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1
00:00:02,606 --> 00:00:04,375
♪
2
00:00:07,982 --> 00:00:09,352
[Marge groans]
3
00:00:09,385 --> 00:00:10,655
[Marge] Hmm.
4
00:00:10,689 --> 00:00:13,160
Who are these
perfectly coiffed young men
5
00:00:13,193 --> 00:00:14,864
on all the billboards?
6
00:00:14,930 --> 00:00:16,901
Wolfgang Von Bassdrop?
7
00:00:16,934 --> 00:00:19,607
Pound Sign Von Pound Sign?
8
00:00:19,640 --> 00:00:21,042
Sex Towel?
9
00:00:21,076 --> 00:00:22,913
Glenn the Eruptor?
10
00:00:22,946 --> 00:00:24,182
[scoffs] In my day,
11
00:00:24,215 --> 00:00:26,319
billboards advertised
things that made sense,
12
00:00:26,352 --> 00:00:29,660
like energy drinks or exciting
new windshield repair companies.
13
00:00:29,693 --> 00:00:32,264
Now it's just an endless stream
of lookalike weirdos
14
00:00:32,298 --> 00:00:34,001
who no one has ever heard of.
15
00:00:34,035 --> 00:00:36,707
They're all DJs with residencies
16
00:00:36,740 --> 00:00:38,978
at casinos and nightclubs.
17
00:00:39,011 --> 00:00:41,416
They can make millions
of dollars in one night.
18
00:00:41,449 --> 00:00:45,524
I heard DJ Cheeseface bought
his parents a mansion.
19
00:00:46,561 --> 00:00:47,662
That's right, Homer.
20
00:00:47,695 --> 00:00:49,198
He bought us a mansion.
21
00:00:49,232 --> 00:00:51,135
Son buy mansion?
22
00:00:51,971 --> 00:00:53,807
Bart is son.
23
00:00:55,846 --> 00:00:57,682
[crickets chirping]
24
00:00:57,716 --> 00:01:00,253
[snoring softly]
25
00:01:00,253 --> 00:01:01,791
[shouts, grunting]
26
00:01:01,857 --> 00:01:03,259
What the hell are you doing?
27
00:01:03,293 --> 00:01:05,330
Duh, I'm giving you a glow-up
28
00:01:05,364 --> 00:01:07,201
for your rewarding new career.
29
00:01:07,234 --> 00:01:08,772
Keeping you off the streets
30
00:01:08,805 --> 00:01:10,474
and me in a mansion.
31
00:01:10,508 --> 00:01:12,812
You're going to be
the world's next hot DJ.
32
00:01:12,845 --> 00:01:15,652
You can start by mixing
with all my old records.
33
00:01:15,685 --> 00:01:18,356
Smash Mouth, British
nerd rocker Thomas Dolby.
34
00:01:18,390 --> 00:01:20,861
Akron, Ohio nerd rockers Devo.
35
00:01:20,861 --> 00:01:22,832
And Taco's Puttin' On the Ritz.
36
00:01:22,866 --> 00:01:26,039
Mmm, tacos, pudding and Ritz.
37
00:01:26,072 --> 00:01:28,076
From these musical seeds,
you will grow
38
00:01:28,110 --> 00:01:30,748
a mighty skyscraper
of DJ fame and fortune.
39
00:01:30,782 --> 00:01:32,451
Now get behind those turntables
40
00:01:32,485 --> 00:01:35,659
and start spinning
that big stack of black shellac.
41
00:01:35,692 --> 00:01:37,261
[scratching record]
42
00:01:37,294 --> 00:01:39,799
[playing "She Blinded Me
with Science" by Thomas Dolby]
43
00:01:41,937 --> 00:01:44,341
-Hey, this doesn't suck.
-[playing "Whip It" by Devo]
44
00:01:44,375 --> 00:01:46,479
[both songs continue playing
as a mash-up]
45
00:01:46,513 --> 00:01:48,350
I've always wanted to do
something creative
46
00:01:48,383 --> 00:01:49,954
without actually
creating something.
47
00:01:49,987 --> 00:01:51,189
♪ She blinded me
with science... ♪
48
00:01:51,222 --> 00:01:53,561
Hmm, something's still off.
49
00:01:53,594 --> 00:01:55,363
Ah!
50
00:01:55,430 --> 00:01:57,835
♪ Give the past a slip... ♪
51
00:01:59,204 --> 00:02:01,409
Perfect! Dominate that mix, boy.
52
00:02:01,442 --> 00:02:03,279
Rave against the dawn.
53
00:02:03,313 --> 00:02:06,086
♪ When a problem comes along,
you must whip it ♪
54
00:02:06,119 --> 00:02:10,728
♪ Before the cream sits out
too long, you must whip it... ♪
55
00:02:11,730 --> 00:02:12,866
[yawns]
56
00:02:12,899 --> 00:02:14,769
What's all this ruckus?
57
00:02:14,803 --> 00:02:16,607
It's the middle of the night.
58
00:02:16,640 --> 00:02:19,178
If the boy's gonna succeed
in the DJ world,
59
00:02:19,211 --> 00:02:21,517
he needs to practice
on Ibiza time,
60
00:02:21,550 --> 00:02:23,253
though at this point,
I don't even think
61
00:02:23,286 --> 00:02:25,057
he's good enough for Corfu.
62
00:02:25,090 --> 00:02:27,294
I don't know what
any of those words mean,
63
00:02:27,327 --> 00:02:30,066
but Maggie needs her sleep.
64
00:02:30,100 --> 00:02:32,037
♪ Now whip it ♪
65
00:02:32,071 --> 00:02:33,874
♪ Into shape ♪
66
00:02:33,907 --> 00:02:36,212
♪ Shape it up, get straight... ♪
67
00:02:36,245 --> 00:02:38,984
There, I made her
A Quiet Place box.
68
00:02:39,018 --> 00:02:41,255
From the mind of John Krasinski.
69
00:02:41,289 --> 00:02:43,460
I hate that guy!
70
00:02:43,493 --> 00:02:46,099
Bart cannot be a DJ
in our basement.
71
00:02:46,132 --> 00:02:49,204
Honey, I completely agree.
72
00:02:51,342 --> 00:02:53,446
Enjoy the billboard, pally.
73
00:02:53,479 --> 00:02:55,551
Seems like a good investment
to me.
74
00:02:55,585 --> 00:02:58,356
I don't have a single concern.
75
00:02:58,390 --> 00:03:00,094
[electronic dance music playing]
76
00:03:00,127 --> 00:03:02,164
♪
77
00:03:02,198 --> 00:03:04,803
[lively chatter]
78
00:03:04,836 --> 00:03:06,272
[cheering]
79
00:03:06,305 --> 00:03:09,312
Bart-- I mean Bartholomieux.
80
00:03:09,345 --> 00:03:11,917
When are you planning
to drop the beat?
81
00:03:11,951 --> 00:03:14,389
Apparently, it's very important.
82
00:03:14,422 --> 00:03:17,328
Evening, Homer,
or should I say morning?
83
00:03:17,361 --> 00:03:19,566
Listen, you know I like
to keep my blankets dry
84
00:03:19,599 --> 00:03:23,039
and my parties unpooped,
but, uh, all this, well,
85
00:03:23,073 --> 00:03:24,877
noise, I guess you'd call it,
86
00:03:24,910 --> 00:03:27,915
is making it difficult
for me and my boys to sleep.
87
00:03:27,949 --> 00:03:29,252
It's not noise.
88
00:03:29,285 --> 00:03:31,590
It's a tantalizing journey
into sound.
89
00:03:31,623 --> 00:03:35,698
Well, could you at least ask
Bart to turn it diddly down?
90
00:03:35,698 --> 00:03:37,168
What?!
91
00:03:37,201 --> 00:03:38,871
Turn it diddly down!
92
00:03:38,904 --> 00:03:41,242
[Flanders' voice]
♪ Diddly down, d-diddly down ♪
93
00:03:41,276 --> 00:03:42,846
♪ Did-diddly down,
did-did-did-did... ♪
94
00:03:42,879 --> 00:03:45,819
Whoa, listen to the cool guy
in the song.
95
00:03:45,852 --> 00:03:48,356
[laughs] I wish I was you.
96
00:03:48,389 --> 00:03:50,795
See you later,
DJ Stupid Mustache.
97
00:03:50,861 --> 00:03:53,366
[sighs] Okily-dokily.
98
00:03:53,399 --> 00:03:55,104
[Flanders' voice]
♪ Okily-dokily, Okily-dokily ♪
99
00:03:55,104 --> 00:03:56,941
♪ Did-diddly down,
did-did-did... ♪
100
00:03:56,974 --> 00:03:59,445
[cheering]
101
00:04:00,247 --> 00:04:01,517
♪ Cheese mansion ♪
102
00:04:01,550 --> 00:04:04,321
♪ Mansion made of cheese. ♪
103
00:04:07,027 --> 00:04:08,496
What you got there, Flanders?
104
00:04:08,531 --> 00:04:10,634
Well, sir, it occurred to me
that, uh,
105
00:04:10,668 --> 00:04:12,638
if I'm a little, uh, [chuckles]
106
00:04:12,672 --> 00:04:14,843
inconvenienced
by Bart's musical endeavors,
107
00:04:14,876 --> 00:04:16,947
it's, uh, really up to me
to find a solution.
108
00:04:16,981 --> 00:04:20,286
So I went out and purchased
three pairs of these good boys.
109
00:04:20,320 --> 00:04:22,491
Noice-canceling headphones, eh?
110
00:04:22,526 --> 00:04:24,329
Man, I've always wanted
to try those.
111
00:04:24,362 --> 00:04:26,199
Mind if I take them out
for a test spin?
112
00:04:26,232 --> 00:04:27,735
Well, actually, I--
113
00:04:27,769 --> 00:04:29,606
Thanks, neighbor.
114
00:04:31,543 --> 00:04:32,945
Hello there, Mrs. McCormick.
115
00:04:32,979 --> 00:04:37,087
Dark times shall come
to Evergreen Terrace
116
00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:39,258
before the year is out.
117
00:04:39,291 --> 00:04:42,131
[laughs] Oh, Mrs. McCormick,
118
00:04:42,164 --> 00:04:44,803
I do so enjoy
your dire portents.
119
00:04:44,836 --> 00:04:46,138
[humming]
120
00:04:46,172 --> 00:04:48,009
[electronic dance music playing]
121
00:04:48,042 --> 00:04:50,446
♪
122
00:04:52,685 --> 00:04:55,157
Oh, this beat's
getting pretty big.
123
00:04:55,223 --> 00:04:57,194
Maybe I'll drop it soon.
124
00:04:57,228 --> 00:04:59,431
Or maybe I won't.
125
00:04:59,465 --> 00:05:01,570
For God's sake,
drop it, Bartholomieux!
126
00:05:01,604 --> 00:05:04,743
The tension, while delicious,
is unbearable!
127
00:05:04,776 --> 00:05:06,780
♪
128
00:05:08,784 --> 00:05:10,387
[yelping]
129
00:05:10,421 --> 00:05:12,391
[chuckles, grunts]
130
00:05:12,424 --> 00:05:14,596
[music playing quietly]
131
00:05:18,436 --> 00:05:20,708
[music playing loudly]
132
00:05:20,741 --> 00:05:25,184
Daddy, this noise unto the Lord
isn't joyful.
133
00:05:25,217 --> 00:05:28,658
[babbling gibberish]
134
00:05:28,691 --> 00:05:30,694
♪
135
00:05:35,470 --> 00:05:37,207
[music playing quietly]
136
00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:38,911
[music playing loudly]
137
00:05:38,944 --> 00:05:40,515
[music playing quietly]
138
00:05:40,548 --> 00:05:42,317
[music playing loudly]
139
00:05:42,350 --> 00:05:43,988
[music playing quietly]
140
00:05:44,021 --> 00:05:46,526
[music playing loudly]
141
00:05:56,245 --> 00:05:58,116
[all gasping]
142
00:05:58,149 --> 00:06:00,153
♪
143
00:06:01,857 --> 00:06:03,627
Bart, what happened?
144
00:06:03,660 --> 00:06:07,133
The beat,
I waited too long to drop it.
145
00:06:07,167 --> 00:06:09,171
It was like a tiger in a cage,
146
00:06:09,204 --> 00:06:11,743
and I just kept taunting it.
147
00:06:11,777 --> 00:06:13,346
[crying]
148
00:06:13,379 --> 00:06:15,918
Yates was right:
"Things fall apart.
149
00:06:15,951 --> 00:06:17,588
The center cannot hold."
150
00:06:17,622 --> 00:06:19,593
And when he wrote that in 1918,
151
00:06:19,626 --> 00:06:21,930
they didn't even have DJs.
152
00:06:21,964 --> 00:06:23,399
I'm sorry, Dad,
153
00:06:23,432 --> 00:06:26,105
but I'm out of the DJ game.
154
00:06:26,138 --> 00:06:27,440
But what about my mansion?
155
00:06:27,440 --> 00:06:29,780
I've already started
interviewing butlers.
156
00:06:29,846 --> 00:06:32,484
I used to think
DJs were overpaid frauds,
157
00:06:32,518 --> 00:06:35,725
but I now know they require
the nerves of a surgeon
158
00:06:35,758 --> 00:06:37,696
and the rare gift
of turning music
159
00:06:37,729 --> 00:06:39,833
into faster, louder music.
160
00:06:39,866 --> 00:06:42,605
If anything,
they aren't paid enough.
161
00:06:45,845 --> 00:06:47,014
Sorry, guys.
162
00:06:47,047 --> 00:06:48,551
You can all go home.
163
00:06:48,584 --> 00:06:50,354
-Right, very good, sir.
-As you wish, sir.
164
00:06:50,420 --> 00:06:52,759
It's been an honor, sir.
165
00:06:53,928 --> 00:06:57,234
I'm just glad we were able to
sleep through your big explode-o
166
00:06:57,268 --> 00:07:01,408
thanks to those noise-canceling
headphones your father bought.
167
00:07:01,442 --> 00:07:03,313
Oh, actually, I didn't buy them.
168
00:07:03,346 --> 00:07:05,551
I-I kind of borrowed them
from Flanders.
169
00:07:05,585 --> 00:07:07,956
So Ned and his boys
had to spend the night
170
00:07:07,989 --> 00:07:09,993
enduring that--
no offense, Bart--
171
00:07:10,027 --> 00:07:11,095
racket?!
172
00:07:11,128 --> 00:07:13,568
Homer Simpson,
you return those headphones
173
00:07:13,601 --> 00:07:16,372
and apologize immediately.
174
00:07:16,406 --> 00:07:17,842
Fine. [scoffs]
175
00:07:17,876 --> 00:07:20,013
The things I do for this family.
176
00:07:21,516 --> 00:07:22,985
Oh, hey, Flanders.
177
00:07:22,985 --> 00:07:24,789
I was just bringing back
your headphones.
178
00:07:24,822 --> 00:07:26,860
Oh, you don't look so good.
179
00:07:26,893 --> 00:07:29,432
Did you get beat up
at the circus?
180
00:07:29,499 --> 00:07:31,770
Homer, this sweater is
the one thing
181
00:07:31,804 --> 00:07:34,308
you've never,
ever borrowed from me.
182
00:07:34,341 --> 00:07:36,179
So I'm giving it to you now.
183
00:07:36,212 --> 00:07:37,280
[headphones clatter]
184
00:07:37,347 --> 00:07:39,485
Hmm. Hmm-hmm.
185
00:07:39,519 --> 00:07:42,157
Ah, it's a little small.
186
00:07:42,191 --> 00:07:44,462
Now that I've literally
given you the shirt off my back,
187
00:07:44,495 --> 00:07:49,138
you and I will never have any
reason to interact ever again.
188
00:07:49,171 --> 00:07:54,916
In fact, these are the
last words I'll ever say to you.
189
00:07:55,918 --> 00:07:58,858
Oh, I've never seen Ned
that upset.
190
00:07:58,891 --> 00:08:01,997
Ned Flanders is never
going to speak to me again?
191
00:08:02,030 --> 00:08:02,898
Ever?
192
00:08:02,932 --> 00:08:05,336
I guess I only have two words.
193
00:08:05,370 --> 00:08:06,940
Woo-hoo!
194
00:08:06,974 --> 00:08:08,644
[thunder crashes]
195
00:08:08,677 --> 00:08:11,348
The dark times have begun.
196
00:08:12,183 --> 00:08:16,159
Some days I wish Mrs. McCormick
had never moved here.
197
00:08:16,192 --> 00:08:18,195
♪
198
00:08:25,076 --> 00:08:26,746
So, Flanders thinks
he'll never speak
199
00:08:26,780 --> 00:08:28,183
another word to me again, eh?
200
00:08:28,216 --> 00:08:29,351
Well, I say woo-hoo.
201
00:08:29,384 --> 00:08:30,554
Have I said woo-hoo yet?
202
00:08:30,588 --> 00:08:33,192
You have, Homer.
203
00:08:34,328 --> 00:08:35,665
Well, it bears repeating.
204
00:08:35,698 --> 00:08:38,402
I mean, does he think
I enjoy talking to him?
205
00:08:38,436 --> 00:08:40,206
Because I don't.
206
00:08:40,240 --> 00:08:41,776
[Marge groans]
207
00:08:43,581 --> 00:08:45,150
You're right, if anything,
208
00:08:45,183 --> 00:08:47,621
it should be me that never says
another word to him.
209
00:08:47,655 --> 00:08:51,095
In fact, do you know
who the real victim is?
210
00:08:51,128 --> 00:08:52,331
Is it you?
211
00:08:52,364 --> 00:08:53,767
Bingo.
212
00:08:54,903 --> 00:08:57,140
However, if Flanders thinks
that by not talking to me,
213
00:08:57,174 --> 00:08:59,311
he [laughs] wins,
214
00:08:59,378 --> 00:09:00,882
I cannot allow that to happen.
215
00:09:00,915 --> 00:09:04,923
By this time tomorrow,
he'll be talking my ear off.
216
00:09:04,956 --> 00:09:06,325
Great plan.
217
00:09:07,361 --> 00:09:08,597
[Homer]
It is a great plan,
218
00:09:08,630 --> 00:09:10,199
and I'll tell you why.
219
00:09:11,235 --> 00:09:12,438
I'm asleep, aren't I?
220
00:09:12,471 --> 00:09:13,940
Yes.
221
00:09:14,976 --> 00:09:16,613
[doorbell rings]
222
00:09:16,647 --> 00:09:18,282
Listen up, Flanders,
we need to talk
223
00:09:18,315 --> 00:09:21,255
about this so-called
"vow of silence" of yours.
224
00:09:21,289 --> 00:09:22,858
You go first.
225
00:09:23,661 --> 00:09:25,096
[whimpers]
226
00:09:25,130 --> 00:09:28,537
I've never seen my daddy
so angry before.
227
00:09:28,570 --> 00:09:30,106
It's like a bad movie.
228
00:09:30,139 --> 00:09:32,210
Have you ever seen a movie,
Todd?
229
00:09:32,244 --> 00:09:33,880
No. What happens?
230
00:09:33,914 --> 00:09:36,152
-A lot of stuff.
-Neat!
231
00:09:36,185 --> 00:09:39,559
Oh, my dad has done
so many bad things to your dad,
232
00:09:39,593 --> 00:09:41,896
and I think your dad
has finally had enough.
233
00:09:41,930 --> 00:09:44,535
I really don't think
this is gonna blow over.
234
00:09:44,569 --> 00:09:46,238
-[leaf blower buzzing]
-[Homer] Oh, my God.
235
00:09:46,305 --> 00:09:47,676
Look what's blowing over.
236
00:09:47,709 --> 00:09:49,411
Leaves from my tree.
237
00:09:49,445 --> 00:09:51,315
And they're going
into Flanders' yard.
238
00:09:51,348 --> 00:09:53,887
Neighbors fight over
this kind of thing all the time,
239
00:09:53,954 --> 00:09:57,562
so I bet you have something
to say to me about it.
240
00:09:57,595 --> 00:09:58,697
Oh, come on, Flanders.
241
00:09:58,731 --> 00:10:00,133
Yell or something.
242
00:10:00,166 --> 00:10:01,537
Put me in my place.
243
00:10:01,570 --> 00:10:02,539
-[yells]
-[thuds]
244
00:10:02,572 --> 00:10:03,940
[groaning]
245
00:10:03,974 --> 00:10:07,448
Should we help your dad
or wait till he stops twitching?
246
00:10:07,481 --> 00:10:09,919
I find it's best to wait.
247
00:10:14,562 --> 00:10:16,833
Sir, I'm about to make your day.
248
00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:19,070
I just need
a full oral presentation
249
00:10:19,104 --> 00:10:21,709
on all of your
left-handed wares.
250
00:10:21,743 --> 00:10:23,112
Spoken, please.
251
00:10:26,720 --> 00:10:28,557
Left-handed apple peeler.
252
00:10:28,590 --> 00:10:30,227
Left-handed chip clip.
253
00:10:30,293 --> 00:10:31,697
Left-handed belt buckle.
254
00:10:31,730 --> 00:10:33,299
Big Book
of Left-Handed Compliments.
255
00:10:33,332 --> 00:10:34,334
Hmm.
256
00:10:38,342 --> 00:10:39,344
[gasps]
257
00:10:41,950 --> 00:10:43,052
[sighs]
258
00:10:46,759 --> 00:10:47,795
[Homer gasps]
259
00:10:47,828 --> 00:10:51,202
Oh, I should've known
he'd have a backup Savior.
260
00:10:51,235 --> 00:10:53,205
[hip-hop beat playing]
261
00:10:55,010 --> 00:10:57,648
All the ladies in the house,
go, "Hey!"
262
00:10:57,682 --> 00:10:58,584
[women]
Hey!
263
00:10:58,617 --> 00:11:01,623
All the fellas in the house,
go, "Whoo!"
264
00:11:01,656 --> 00:11:02,625
[men]
Whoo!
265
00:11:02,625 --> 00:11:05,898
All the Flanders in the house,
say anything!
266
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:10,006
Everybody in the house,
give me a second.
267
00:11:10,039 --> 00:11:11,509
-[whimpers]
-[beat stops playing]
268
00:11:11,543 --> 00:11:13,412
[crowd murmuring]
269
00:11:13,446 --> 00:11:15,082
[groans]
270
00:11:19,659 --> 00:11:21,428
[sighs] Oh, boy.
271
00:11:21,462 --> 00:11:22,598
[doorbell rings]
272
00:11:22,631 --> 00:11:23,901
Hiya, Marge.
273
00:11:23,934 --> 00:11:25,705
To what do I owe
my guest appearance
274
00:11:25,738 --> 00:11:27,273
in your blessed day?
275
00:11:27,306 --> 00:11:30,915
Actually, Ned, I was wondering
if you and I could maybe
276
00:11:30,948 --> 00:11:34,422
discuss this situation
between you and Homer.
277
00:11:34,455 --> 00:11:35,456
Of course we could.
278
00:11:35,489 --> 00:11:36,960
Come on in.
279
00:11:38,998 --> 00:11:40,801
♪
280
00:11:40,834 --> 00:11:42,805
[no audio]
281
00:11:42,839 --> 00:11:44,742
[Homer whimpering]
282
00:11:50,821 --> 00:11:52,725
So? So? Did he talk about me?
283
00:11:52,758 --> 00:11:54,394
He sure did.
284
00:11:54,427 --> 00:11:56,398
[sighs] I got to say, Homer,
285
00:11:56,431 --> 00:11:57,902
if I weren't married to you,
286
00:11:57,935 --> 00:12:00,674
I probably wouldn't talk
to you, either.
287
00:12:00,708 --> 00:12:03,112
Oh, I can't take this anymore.
288
00:12:03,145 --> 00:12:04,916
I thought Flanders
not talking to me
289
00:12:04,950 --> 00:12:06,318
would be a magical Mardi Gras,
290
00:12:06,352 --> 00:12:09,157
but instead it's been
a never-ending Lent.
291
00:12:09,191 --> 00:12:11,028
[crying]
292
00:12:11,061 --> 00:12:12,898
Lent!
293
00:12:12,932 --> 00:12:15,136
Then why not do the one thing
you haven't done?
294
00:12:15,169 --> 00:12:16,807
Apologize.
295
00:12:16,840 --> 00:12:17,809
That's it.
296
00:12:17,842 --> 00:12:19,378
I'll write him an apology.
297
00:12:19,411 --> 00:12:21,916
♪
298
00:12:45,496 --> 00:12:47,167
Hmm, mm-hmm.
299
00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:48,504
Mm-hmm.
300
00:12:48,537 --> 00:12:50,874
Actually, Dad, it's good.
301
00:12:50,907 --> 00:12:52,010
Really good.
302
00:12:52,043 --> 00:12:55,316
I had no idea you had
such depths of feeling in you.
303
00:12:55,349 --> 00:12:57,053
I mean, wow.
304
00:12:57,087 --> 00:12:58,991
You did quote the movie
Point Break
305
00:12:58,991 --> 00:13:01,195
more than I expected,
but I really think
306
00:13:01,228 --> 00:13:03,868
Mr. Flanders may finally
forgive you.
307
00:13:03,901 --> 00:13:05,136
I hope you're right.
308
00:13:05,170 --> 00:13:07,975
I bared my whole soul in this
letter, and it feels amazing.
309
00:13:08,009 --> 00:13:11,549
Writers must be the happiest
people in the world.
310
00:13:13,286 --> 00:13:15,356
Knock 'em dead, Dad.
311
00:13:16,793 --> 00:13:18,863
[humming]
312
00:13:19,666 --> 00:13:21,235
[chuckles]
313
00:13:21,268 --> 00:13:24,240
[clattering]
314
00:13:25,310 --> 00:13:26,847
Aah, we've been burgled!
315
00:13:26,914 --> 00:13:30,086
[machine buzzing]
316
00:13:34,060 --> 00:13:36,131
That's our stuff!
What are you doing?
317
00:13:39,338 --> 00:13:42,645
You have to tell me
why you're destroying my stuff!
318
00:13:42,678 --> 00:13:46,251
It's my stuff, you imbecile.
319
00:13:46,284 --> 00:13:49,158
I'm reclaiming everything
you've ever borrowed from me
320
00:13:49,191 --> 00:13:51,495
and destroying it so you can
never borrow it again.
321
00:13:51,530 --> 00:13:54,234
That includes the lock
on your front door.
322
00:13:55,571 --> 00:13:57,641
But what about my apology?
323
00:13:57,675 --> 00:13:59,913
Homer,
your apology was beautiful,
324
00:13:59,946 --> 00:14:02,251
heartfelt and enraging!
325
00:14:02,284 --> 00:14:03,252
Huh?
326
00:14:03,286 --> 00:14:05,190
You know, I gave you a pass
all these years
327
00:14:05,223 --> 00:14:07,394
'cause I thought you were
just too dumb to know better,
328
00:14:07,427 --> 00:14:10,099
but this eloquent plea
for forgiveness
329
00:14:10,133 --> 00:14:13,439
shows you're a thinking,
feeling human being,
330
00:14:13,473 --> 00:14:16,144
and you did that stuff
to me anyway!
331
00:14:17,480 --> 00:14:18,449
[gasps] My couch!
332
00:14:18,483 --> 00:14:20,954
The one thing in this world
I truly love.
333
00:14:20,988 --> 00:14:22,390
It's my couch.
334
00:14:22,457 --> 00:14:25,263
You borrowed it from me
the very first day we met.
335
00:14:25,297 --> 00:14:28,970
[screams] I've got to get over
there and stop this madness!
336
00:14:31,943 --> 00:14:34,280
[tires screech]
337
00:14:34,314 --> 00:14:36,251
Gone to Flanders' to save couch.
338
00:14:36,285 --> 00:14:38,122
Home for dinner.
339
00:14:38,957 --> 00:14:41,027
[gasps] My car.
340
00:14:41,829 --> 00:14:43,432
You killed my car!
341
00:14:43,466 --> 00:14:44,769
Okay, mister,
342
00:14:44,802 --> 00:14:46,672
I'll kill your car.
343
00:14:47,975 --> 00:14:50,714
[tires screech]
344
00:14:50,748 --> 00:14:52,049
[yelps, grunts]
345
00:14:56,225 --> 00:14:57,695
Car fight!
346
00:14:57,728 --> 00:14:59,999
[all chanting]
Car fight! Car fight!
347
00:15:00,032 --> 00:15:01,969
Car fight!
348
00:15:03,773 --> 00:15:05,442
[engines revving]
349
00:15:05,476 --> 00:15:07,180
[grunts angrily]
350
00:15:11,756 --> 00:15:13,960
[both groaning woozily]
351
00:15:21,509 --> 00:15:23,312
I don't want to hear it.
352
00:15:31,328 --> 00:15:33,165
-[gavel banging]
-What do you two chuckleheads
353
00:15:33,198 --> 00:15:34,669
have to say for yourselves?
354
00:15:34,702 --> 00:15:36,138
I hate him more than Joab
355
00:15:36,171 --> 00:15:38,008
hated Abner
in the Book of Samuel.
356
00:15:38,042 --> 00:15:40,146
I hate him more
than Tennessee Tuxedo
357
00:15:40,179 --> 00:15:42,450
hated the tedium of his life
in the zoo.
358
00:15:42,518 --> 00:15:44,288
-I don't know
what to say to you.
-Oh, yeah?
359
00:15:44,321 --> 00:15:46,893
Well, Chumley the Walrus
has a lot more to say
360
00:15:46,926 --> 00:15:49,197
-about this situation--
-[gavel banging]
361
00:15:49,230 --> 00:15:51,368
I have never seen two people
with such a bitter hatred
362
00:15:51,402 --> 00:15:54,542
for each other outside
of happily married couples.
363
00:15:54,575 --> 00:15:57,213
Hmm, well, that gives me an idea
for one of my folksy,
364
00:15:57,280 --> 00:15:59,585
movie premise-like judgments.
365
00:15:59,619 --> 00:16:02,424
Instead of jail,
I sentence the two of you
366
00:16:02,457 --> 00:16:05,129
to 100 hours
of couples counseling.
367
00:16:05,163 --> 00:16:07,000
-[gallery gasps]
-D'oh!
368
00:16:07,033 --> 00:16:09,103
Permission to use profanity,
Your Honor?
369
00:16:09,137 --> 00:16:10,440
I'll allow it.
370
00:16:10,473 --> 00:16:11,809
Marmalade milkshake!
371
00:16:11,843 --> 00:16:13,580
[gallery gasps]
372
00:16:16,184 --> 00:16:18,456
Look, I need you both to know
373
00:16:18,489 --> 00:16:21,094
that this isn't gonna be
an overnight fix.
374
00:16:21,128 --> 00:16:24,300
It could take years
of intensive, soul-baring--
375
00:16:24,334 --> 00:16:27,741
Could you please stop flicking
each other in the eyeballs?
376
00:16:27,775 --> 00:16:30,212
[both groaning]
377
00:16:32,283 --> 00:16:34,121
All right, that does it
for talk therapy.
378
00:16:34,154 --> 00:16:35,891
Luckily, there are drugs.
379
00:16:35,891 --> 00:16:37,995
-I don't do drugs.
-I'll have his.
380
00:16:38,029 --> 00:16:40,399
There have been
amazing advances in the use
381
00:16:40,433 --> 00:16:43,338
of therapeutic psychedelics
for dysfunctional couples.
382
00:16:43,372 --> 00:16:46,145
U-completamine will take you
on a shared journey
383
00:16:46,178 --> 00:16:47,748
that could help
resolve your conflict,
384
00:16:47,781 --> 00:16:50,621
with only a slight risk
of permanent brain explosion,
385
00:16:50,621 --> 00:16:52,056
or "PBE."
386
00:16:52,090 --> 00:16:53,860
I'll happily blow up
both our brains
387
00:16:53,894 --> 00:16:57,333
if there's the slightest chance
of making Ned suck less.
388
00:16:57,367 --> 00:17:00,172
[sighs] I can't live
with this anger anymore.
389
00:17:00,206 --> 00:17:02,310
-Let's just do it.
-[yelps in pain]
390
00:17:02,344 --> 00:17:06,051
[Annette]
The drug is now slowly
entering your bloodstream.
391
00:17:06,084 --> 00:17:07,755
Just relax and remember...
392
00:17:07,788 --> 00:17:09,190
if you see a door, open it.
393
00:17:09,224 --> 00:17:10,794
If you see a road, follow it.
394
00:17:10,827 --> 00:17:12,163
And most importantly...
395
00:17:12,197 --> 00:17:16,739
[distorted, echoing]
we don't take insurance.
396
00:17:16,773 --> 00:17:18,743
[electronic dance music playing]
397
00:17:18,776 --> 00:17:19,746
I'm scared.
398
00:17:19,779 --> 00:17:20,781
Where are we going?
399
00:17:20,814 --> 00:17:23,085
I don't dang-diddly know.
400
00:17:23,820 --> 00:17:25,456
Soul sensors activate.
401
00:17:25,490 --> 00:17:27,695
How many of you
beautiful mutants are ready
402
00:17:27,728 --> 00:17:30,767
to drop some serious
repressed emotions?
403
00:17:30,801 --> 00:17:33,438
[crowd cheering]
404
00:17:36,579 --> 00:17:39,017
[Homer screams]
What the hell is going on?
405
00:17:39,050 --> 00:17:40,687
[Flanders]
We're cartoons.
406
00:17:45,564 --> 00:17:46,966
[screams] Garfunkel!
407
00:17:46,999 --> 00:17:48,302
Turtlenecks!
408
00:17:55,951 --> 00:17:58,155
Good grief!
409
00:17:59,357 --> 00:18:01,930
Why did we turn
into all those famous duos?
410
00:18:01,963 --> 00:18:03,065
Famous?
411
00:18:03,099 --> 00:18:04,868
I didn't recognize any of them.
412
00:18:05,971 --> 00:18:08,609
[both gasping, whimpering]
413
00:18:10,514 --> 00:18:13,018
[Flanders]
Now we have no corporeal form!
414
00:18:13,085 --> 00:18:15,322
[Homer]
Nice going, Flanders.
415
00:18:17,895 --> 00:18:20,266
♪
416
00:18:20,300 --> 00:18:22,804
-[all yelling]
-[elephant trumpeting]
417
00:18:27,246 --> 00:18:28,850
[bird screeches]
418
00:18:29,852 --> 00:18:31,856
[dragon roars]
419
00:18:39,003 --> 00:18:40,874
Everyone's dead.
420
00:18:40,908 --> 00:18:44,715
Which means no one's defending
your brain castle.
421
00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:46,118
[pained whimper]
422
00:18:46,151 --> 00:18:49,457
♪
423
00:18:50,493 --> 00:18:51,394
[gasps]
424
00:18:51,428 --> 00:18:55,270
Flanders' head is full of me.
425
00:18:55,303 --> 00:18:58,710
Homer has a shrine to me?
426
00:19:01,882 --> 00:19:04,120
[both]
I think I get it now.
427
00:19:04,154 --> 00:19:06,424
I see how happy
and successful you are,
428
00:19:06,458 --> 00:19:08,429
so I think
I'm not worthy of you.
429
00:19:08,462 --> 00:19:11,836
I treat you terribly
out of my own insecurity.
430
00:19:11,870 --> 00:19:15,710
Also because you've got awesome
stuff and I like taking it.
431
00:19:15,743 --> 00:19:18,482
And I wish I could savor life
half as much as you do.
432
00:19:18,516 --> 00:19:22,691
But what I truly love is feeling
morally superior to you.
433
00:19:22,725 --> 00:19:25,697
That's why I accept and even
encourage your worst behavior.
434
00:19:25,730 --> 00:19:27,801
Like how you're scratching
your butt
435
00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:29,071
with that statue of me.
436
00:19:29,104 --> 00:19:30,774
[grunting]
437
00:19:30,774 --> 00:19:32,376
What? It's pointy.
438
00:19:32,410 --> 00:19:37,253
So I-I guess what we really want
is the status quo.
439
00:19:37,286 --> 00:19:39,390
Status whoa!
440
00:19:39,390 --> 00:19:42,364
Another U-completamine
breakthrough.
441
00:19:42,397 --> 00:19:44,702
Well, how is it possible
we had the exact same
442
00:19:44,735 --> 00:19:46,438
psychedelic sleigh ride?
443
00:19:46,472 --> 00:19:48,242
And why are you a part of it?
444
00:19:48,275 --> 00:19:49,444
I couldn't tell you.
445
00:19:49,478 --> 00:19:51,516
No one has any idea
how these drugs work.
446
00:19:51,549 --> 00:19:52,918
Bye!
447
00:19:52,951 --> 00:19:54,655
♪
448
00:19:58,229 --> 00:20:00,533
Well, Homer, any thoughts?
449
00:20:02,236 --> 00:20:05,810
-[Flanders sobbing]
-[crying] Oh, Flanders!
450
00:20:05,844 --> 00:20:07,848
[birds chirping]
451
00:20:12,357 --> 00:20:14,494
[Flanders]
Homer, did you take
my paper again?
452
00:20:14,528 --> 00:20:17,033
No. Why would you say that?
453
00:20:17,066 --> 00:20:18,570
Because you're holding it.
454
00:20:18,603 --> 00:20:20,940
Florida has a hockey team?
455
00:20:20,974 --> 00:20:22,844
[sighs] You know what, Homer?
456
00:20:22,878 --> 00:20:24,480
Okily-dokily.
457
00:20:24,515 --> 00:20:28,656
Ned, I got something for you.
458
00:20:28,689 --> 00:20:31,128
My sweater.
459
00:20:31,161 --> 00:20:32,496
Thanks, neighborino.
460
00:20:32,531 --> 00:20:35,670
You're welcome, stupid Flanders.
461
00:20:35,704 --> 00:20:37,641
Captioning sponsored by
20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION
462
00:20:37,675 --> 00:20:40,212
and FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY
463
00:20:40,246 --> 00:20:42,016
and TOYOTA.
464
00:20:42,049 --> 00:20:45,456
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
465
00:20:54,107 --> 00:20:56,679
♪ See my vest ♪
466
00:20:56,712 --> 00:20:59,284
♪ See my vest, see my vest ♪
467
00:20:59,317 --> 00:21:00,654
That was Marge, bitch!
468
00:21:00,687 --> 00:21:02,557
♪ Who controls
the British crown? ♪
469
00:21:02,591 --> 00:21:04,862
♪ Who keeps
the metric system down? ♪
470
00:21:04,895 --> 00:21:06,999
♪ The name's Poochie D,
and I rock the telly ♪
471
00:21:07,033 --> 00:21:08,904
♪ I'm half Joe Camel
and a third Fonzarelli ♪
472
00:21:08,937 --> 00:21:11,407
♪ He can talk, he can talk,
he can talk, he can talk ♪
473
00:21:11,441 --> 00:21:13,779
-♪ I can sing ♪
-♪ Oh, oh, Dr. Zaius ♪
474
00:21:13,813 --> 00:21:16,050
-♪ What'd I say? ♪
-♪ Do the Bartman ♪
475
00:21:16,084 --> 00:21:17,855
-♪ What's it called? ♪
-♪ The Bartman ♪
476
00:21:17,888 --> 00:21:19,691
♪ 'Cause everyone is horrid
except me ♪
477
00:21:19,725 --> 00:21:21,562
-♪ And possibly... ♪
-Hit it!
478
00:21:21,595 --> 00:21:23,867
-♪ Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius ♪
-♪ Brain freeze ♪
479
00:21:23,900 --> 00:21:25,571
♪ Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius ♪
480
00:21:25,604 --> 00:21:28,275
♪ Shaving my shoulders ♪
481
00:21:28,308 --> 00:21:31,047
♪ That name again is Mr. Plow. ♪
482
00:21:33,553 --> 00:21:34,688
Shh!
31696
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