Original subtitles

All right, we'll try it out.

Switch me on.

This is new. Rodney's rigged it up for me.

Boys, stop playing with balls near the windows, please.

You know you can't do that.

Thank you. I'm up here. It's me.

I'm in what I call my search phase at the moment,

where I... this is where I come up with my ideas for my musicals.

I seek inspiration.

I look around, take things in.

Uh... about four years ago, I did a show called "Downloadin',"

which was a musical

about a computer that falls in love with its owner.

And I came up with that idea simply from sitting at home

in front of my computer and thinking,

"Oh, imagine if that computer fell in love with me."

Absolutely brilliant... my wife's favorite show.

Switch me on.

Madeleine, don't walk past the rubbish, please.

Pick it up, yes... in the bin.

You could lose 40 house points for that.

Switch me off.

I pride myself on being able to come up with songs in a flash.

I usually... I say to people,

"Give me a word and I'll give you a song."

And I come up with something. Uh...

actually, give me a word and I'll come up with something.

- So we... we get... - Playground.

♪ Playground, play ♪

♪ Come and play in the playground ♪

♪ Playground. ♪

Give me a... give me some...

I'll do a rhyming one this time. Give me uh, like a sentence.

Watching a DVD at your house.

Okay, here we go. Actually, put me on.

♪ Rodney's coming over to watch a DVD ♪

♪ Who's cooking dinner? Not me. ♪

That's how it usually is when you come over, isn't it?

I never... ooh, switch me off. Thank you.

Piss off, year sevens!

If you're in year seven you should not be here. Piss off.

Tomorrow we got Junior School Dance.

It's like... just gay-ass, you know?

Bloody barn dance shit.

- Barn dance. - Polka and shit.

We learn to polka and shit,

all that shit that you learn at school.

- They do free dance at the end... - And we were the best.

- Where they played music, and you can do whatever style dancing you want.

- Yeah, free dance. - We hit the floor and started breaking.

We should do that this year, boy.

Piss off, year sevens! Not even Islander year sevens can be here!

Fuck off!

Keiran thinks he's the best fucking breaker in the whole school,

but he can't break-dance for shit.

He doesn't even know basic moves. He just makes shit up.

He's a little homo who thinks he can break but he can't.

My name's Keiran, and I started at Summer Heights

at the beginning of this term.

I've been breakdancing for about four years now.

I reckon I'm pretty good at it.

I like showing off and entertaining people.

I got into State Champs last year

and won for my age level.

The Junior School Dance should be good.

If I get to break, it'll be good.

I'll do it in front of crowds.

I'd had big crowds at State Champs

and it just made me perform better.

Whoa!

Oh, that's good, 'cause then it's like...

What would you choose, giant tits

or fat with no tits?

I think it's, like, giant tits, 'cause at least then...

- Yeah, giant tits. What am I thinking? ...guys would, like...

Would you ever go out with, like, a fat guy?

- Yeah, would you go out... - No way!

No offense, but I seriously hate all fat people.

Would you ever go out with a public school?

- Public school, for sure. Definitely. - They are actually hot.

I think the fact that they're hot

cancels out the fact that they're public.

I think the biggest thing also is, like, age difference.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

- Like, how much older... - How random. When I was in year 10

I went out with a year-11 guy.

- Are you serious? - Yeah, it was so full-on.

- Everyone at school was freaking out. - But that...

- Can I tell? - Yeah.

- Tell us! - Okay. When she was in year nine

she was going out with this guy, what, like three years older than her.

- It was her brother's friend. - Oh my God!

- I was mature for my age. - Where I live there's this uni student

who went out with a year-six girl.

- Oh my God! - No. That is disgusting.

I'm only joking. I'm only joking.

I was just seeing if you'd believe me.

This is something really random,

but I think some of the year sevens are actually hot at this school.

God, they're like 12 years old, Ja'mie.

- They have acne. - Have you looked at them?

- They have small... - They'll be hot when they get older.

- Like Josh's brother. - Yeah, when they get older.

Josh's brother is hot-ass. What ever happened to the little guy...

he's got like the shaggy mullet, and he wears the wristbands?

- Oh, that's Sebastian. - Sebastian Perrone!

He is hot. I'm in love with Sebastian!

He's cute. I saw him on my first day here.

- He's cute. - The year sevens totally flirt with me.

Have you noticed? Where it's like, "Hold your bag?"

- You know they've got high voices? - You're like their hero.

- Why would you go out with them? - They're totally into me.

But they're hot, like seriously.

You seriously need to see the school counselor.

- It's disgusting. - Admit it. Have a look at year sevens.

They're cute, but put them in lay-by or something.

They're not cute, they're hot!

- She's kind of right. - I would consider going out with one.

- Are you serious? - I'm dead serious.

- I'm starting to, you know... - Go and ask one out then.

Maybe I will, yeah. Maybe I'll go on a date.

Look at you boys.

Where'd you get this shit from?

Where'd you get this shit from?

Hey, miss! See you at Junior Dance!

You're looking good, boys. I'll see you there.

She thinks we look good!

Look at my shoes. Look at my shoes.

- This is the guest star. - They look mad.

- What's this shit? - Holy crap. What's this?

Looks like...

It's come!

It's not come! I didn't come on myself.

- It's come! - It's just milk or something.

Were you thinking of Miss Murray?

What did you do this morning?

It's just yogurt or some shit. Shut up!

You're just jealous. Don't touch it! It's come out of my dick.

So you admit it!

- It is come! - So what if I spoofed on my pants?

So fucking what? It looks good anyway.

I bet you I get some good comments about it today.

Girls like this shit.

I dare you to go up to Miss Wheatley and ask her what it is.

- Miss Wheatley wouldn't even know. - Just ask her.

She's never seen it before. She's not even married.

So? She's probably had some.

- Just ask. - Go up to Miss Wheatley, "Hey, miss,

- do you know what this stain is?" - You really gonna do it?

- Yeah. - Don't do it!

No, don't do it. It's stupid.

I want to do it. You don't even know what this is, Ofa.

A dollar. A dollar, I'll do it.

- A dollar? - A dollar.

A dollar each. You'll end up with $3.

Your shirts are dirty.

Can I have a go at it?

I know it's really random, but can I have a go at it?

- Oh, sorry. - Ja'mie's decided that she

actually wants to go out with Sebastian Perrone.

And so she's over there totally flirting with him now.

- She's flirting with him so bad. - Look at her.

I've got the best phone.

- Really? - It's a Blackberry.

- Who wants it? - I do, I do!

- Oh my God. - You guys are so random!

Go back to your games! I'm not interested anymore.

They so idolize her.

They're obsessed with her. They totally want her so badly.

- Understandably, though. - Exactly.

She's so hot, so... she really wants to be the first year-11 girl

to go out with a year-seven student.

Are there year-seven parties and stuff?

Yeah.

Would you ever invite older girls to them?

- They are seriously flirting so badly. - I know.

- Look. My God. - It's almost embarrassing.

Oh, man, you must be exhausted.

- You gotta do so much physical stuff. - Yeah.

I reckon they would make a cute couple.

- He's pretty cute, yeah, definitely. - Bye, Sebastian.

- He said yes. - Oh my gosh!

That is so cool!

He knew what I wanted straightaway. He was really into it.

We got a lunch date. Yeah, just lunchtime.

Where are you gonna go?

I said meet me at the canteen. I don't know.

- Where do we... - No no. Go to the basketball courts.

- All the couples go there. - Yes! Oh my God.

- It's private there. - It's gonna be so good.

He's so cute. He's way hotter close up.

He's got the best skin,

his nose is so cute.

I have got the most massive butterflies in my stomach right now.

It's gonna be so cool! I can't wait!

Get a spot, get a spot.

Hello, everybody.

I'm sorry to drag you away from what you've been doing.

I have some really very unpleasant news to share with you.

Last night one of our year-11 students

apparently overdosed with Ecstasy

and tragically was found dead this morning.

Now the student is Annabel Dickson of year 11.

Now I know that many of you know her

and she was a very well-liked, very popular student in this school.

The students are going to be obviously quite distressed.

The department is sending out extra counselors

to offer help in the last two periods of the day.

This tragic incident will obviously lead to a lot of media attention,

so for obvious reasons

I ask you not to make any comment to anyone.

Now what I'm going to suggest

is that we might have a moment's silence for Annabel.

Thank you very much for coming now.

Jeez, I can't picture her.

- Did you teach her? - Yeah, last year, science.

- She was absolutely beautiful... - She a slightly tubby girl?

No, that's Trisha Marshall.

- Blonde or brown hair? - Blonde.

Oh God, it's gonna do my head in. I can't picture her at all.

There must be a photo around somewhere of her in this school.

This is gonna mean media attention.

- It's just terrible. - This is freaking me out.

This is a new one.

It seems that any time we extend our trust to Jonah,

he will inevitably abuse it.

I was only showing her 'cause I wasn't sure what it was.

Right, yeah.

What I think, Jonah, is you intentionally provoked Miss Wheatley

by showing her the stains and then asking her what they were.

Now I want you out of those pants and into something clean.

No way, sir! I've got the Junior Dance on.

You are lucky, Jonah, that you are still going.

I could still ban you from it if you're gonna give me any more trouble.

So just get yourself changed.

Fucking gay.

So do you get electives in year seven?

No, you choose electives in year nine.

Oh, cool.

Year seven's such a random year.

So what music are you into?

Hip hop and rock and stuff.

Same! I'm so into hip hop.

My God, we've got so much in common.

I love your wristbands. They're so cute.

- Where'd you get them? - $2 shop.

They're cool. The colors are really good.

They really work with the uniform.

Knowledge and peace.

I love peace. Are you into peace?

Yeah.

I would never go out with a guy that wasn't into peace.

I love your personality, Sebastian. You're so out there.

- How'd you hurt your knee? - I was playing soccer with my friends.

- Oh my God, you fell over. - Yeah.

Oh, so cute.

- Ties are so random, don't you reckon? - Yeah.

What are they? They're, like, just fabric.

- I know. - It's so weird.

- Do you have fat people in your family? - No.

'Cause you know how you get skinny kids

and they end up being really fat when they're older?

Okay.

The school has very definite procedures

for dealing with any antisocial sexual behavior.

And I've got to say I think Jonah is quite confused

about what is appropriate sexually.

Now, Jonah, Mr. Peterson has told me

that you've had a bit of an accident today.

Is there anything you'd like to tell me?

No.

Okay.

Do you ever have wet dreams?

- No, miss. - You don't?

Do you know what wet dreams are?

Yes I do.

Do you ever think of Miss Wheatley in a sexual way?

No. She's ugly, miss.

So what attracted you to me?

Like, what made you want to go out with me?

- Your personality? - Really?

And did you think I was hot, like when you saw me

- on the playground and stuff? - Yeah.

It was pretty obvious from the way you were acting.

So what do you want to know about me?

Um, have you gone out with any other guys?

Yep. I've had 11 actual boyfriends,

and I've pashed like 135 guys.

- Mmm. - Yeah. What about you?

I have never had a girlfriend before.

Oh my God, that's so cute!

So I'll be your first.

That's so cute.

I love your hair.

It's so... I love it.

So...

do you want to, like... do you want to go out? Like officially go out?

All right.

Really?

Oh my God, are you serious? You want to go out?

That is so cool, Sebastian.

Oh my God! That's awesome.

So, like, we'll take it slow at first.

I don't want to get hurt or anything.

Gimme your phone number. Have you got your phone?

I'll give you my number. I've got a Blackberry.

- That's like the best one. - I know. It's so cool.

I'd let you borrow it but it's worth three grand

and my dad'll get pissed off.

- All right. - Okay.

Cool phone number.

Take a photo of me and put it on your screen thing so it comes up when I call.

Show me.

Hot! That's hot-ass! Oh my God.

I'll take some photos of you.

Hot! Look at that, full body.

Just thinking about Annabel. Just take your time.

Today has just rocked everyone's world

and we're all in shock.

Just a reminder, I've got tissues here if anyone needs them.

I worked out who Annabel is, or was.

It turns out she was very good friends with a couple of my year-11 drama girls.

So, yeah, it's been quite a...

a cool little connection there.

So...

who's been to her house? Did you guys ever go to her house?

Yeah.

This is a photo of Annabel that I stole from the front office.

As you can see, she's a beautiful young girl,

so that's disappointing that she's...

done what she did.

It'll be on the news tonight, I reckon.

It'll be good.

No, that's not good.

I spoke to her head teacher in the staff room, and apparently

she was quite known for partying quite hard

and she was into the drinking and the drugs,

so there's a lot of rumors out there.

Is it true that she was anorexic?

She was into the boys in a big way.

She was what the kids would call a "slut,"

which is a terrible thing to say about someone who's just died.

But apparently there's no denying she was one.

...five six seven eight, heel and toe, heel and toe.

One two three four, heel and toe, heel and toe.

Back, two three four.

Shut up! I had to see the nurse.

Fucking sharp, bro.

- Too gay, bro! - Your mother's gay!

Fuck you. Why don't you kill yourself, Thomas?

...heel and toe. Back, two three four.

- Where's Keiran? - He's over there,

in the dance with Sophie. She looks hot.

She might like you in your spicy hot pants.

You might like my fucking fist, homo!

Hey, Jonah, come and have a dance.

Fuck off, miss!

Hardly the words of a gentleman, Jonah.

Sorry, miss.

- You boys ready for free dance? - A little bit.

We're gonna shit all over the year sevens.

Jonah and the Islander boys, you're required to dance like everyone else.

That's bullshit, miss! There's not enough girls to make pairs.

- Make pairs amongst yourselves. - Up you get.

We're not dancing like homos!

Leon, you dance with Ofa. She's a girl.

- Please, she's fat! - Up you get.

- Please! - Come on.

You could at least go and talk to girls.

- Touch her, Leon. - Put your hands around her.

Touch her boobies.

Ja'mie and Sebastian are totally acting like a couple.

They're so cute together.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

It's really weird that they're so perfect together.

They play handball together. They go to the canteen.

They just do everything, like, they're inseparable.

- We going to the canteen or what? - Yeah.

They're really genuine,

like they actually want to see each other.

Can you guys let me off that one? Let me off that one.

Line. She's still in.

Three-chance rule for girls.

They just look so cute together, like,

- you don't notice the age difference. - Not at all.

- You see these adorable, loving... - Yeah...

It's really weird, 'cause like, yeah, they're perfect together.

- I'm so into him. - Really?

Is it love yet?

It's not like deep love, but it's definitely love.

- Really? - Yeah.

I knew that you were gonna love him.

I was on the phone to him last night for like three hours.

- Really? - Are you serious?

He's so funny. Oh my God.

Is the early stage weird though?

- Does it seem like it? - He looks a little bit uncomfortable.

Like, I keep going to hold his hand,

and he's, like, freaking out and doesn't want to.

It takes a long time for guys to warm up to girls,

- to touch them and stuff. - Guys never want to touch you.

- They do after a while. - He's so into you.

- You can so tell. - Can you tell?

- I think it's such a cool thing. - We're meeting at the back gate

and we're gonna walk home together and meet his mom.

- I hope she likes you. - Meeting his parents already.

- I'm so into him. - Do you reckon he's actually the one?

I wasn't surprised, to be honest.

- Is he the one? - Yep, I reckon he's the one.

Oh my God!

That's the end of the formal dance section.

Now we're gonna go into the freestyle dancing.

Now find a bit of space

and remember, no silly behavior will be tolerated.

Do you understand?

This is shit music!

Miss, this is homo music! Put some hip hop on.

Go Keiran!

- Fuck you, Keiran. Have a go. - Yeah, fuck you.

You want a fucking challenge?

- Is that what you fucking want? - Jonah Takalua said he's a fucked up...

Beat that, motherfucker.

Jonah, come here!

- I didn't do anything, sir. - All right, Jonah, you're out.

I'm not jealous of that boy!

Why are you jealous of someone...

- You are out! - I'm not jealous of him!

- That way. - I didn't do anything.

- You promised me, Jonah. - He provoked me.

You just can't... Oh, Jesus, you just...

Elaine, be still, please.

My epiphany came at recess this morning

and I've been on cloud nine ever since.

I've strapped myself to the beast

and I've been writing music and lyrics

and basically I've come up with a concept for my new musical.

And it's about the one and only Annabel Dickson.

Annabel's story is perfect

for musical interpretation.

♪ Annabel, Annabel, Annabel... ♪

I want to get to the truth of Annabel, who she is,

how she became a drug addict;

cover the binge drinking, the sleeping around, the anorexia.

♪ Annabel, you're a slut. ♪

I can't think of a better way to commemorate a student's life than

to write a musical about them.

♪ Annabel Dickson ♪

♪ When girls take drugs and then they die ♪

♪ Who would have thought at Summer Heights High? ♪

♪ On days like these ♪

♪ It's a Bummer Heights High... ♪

There will be a lot of media interest

in the story, of course, which means more audience,

which means more money for the Gregson Performing Arts Center.

So we're all happy.

♪ She's a party girl with a bad habit ♪

♪ A bad habit for drugs ♪

♪ She's a slut and she knows it ♪

♪ She wants to root all the boys ♪

♪ She can't help taking the drugs ♪

♪ On a Saturday night ♪

♪ Ecstasy... ♪

She's been sent by an angel to give me an idea for a musical,

and if it wasn't for her then this show wouldn't be going ahead.

So I'm just over the moon.

Are you seriously gonna break up, Ja'mie?

Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?

I'll be fine. I'm going to meet the little shit at the...

Seriously, I can come with you if you want.

He's such a fucking 12-year-old asshole.

- It's going to be all right. - Just confront him.

- Where have you been? - Class.

- You know why I wanted to meet you? - No.

Where's your phone?

You don't know where your phone is, do you? Because I've got it.

The reason I stole your phone

was to check before I made a massive commitment to you

that you were not cheating on me.

I open your "sent" box and what do I find?

Four messages to Madeleine.

She's just my friend.

Who the fuck is she?

She's my friend.

Friends do not write two text messages in an hour

saying, "See you in English.

Save me a seat."

I don't know why I trusted a year seven.

I don't know what you want from me.

Seriously.

Like, I'm committed to you, okay?

I'm, like, obsessed with you.

I've got a compilation CD in my bag

that I was gonna give you on the way home as a surprise.

I've got you as my background on my MySpace site.

You got nothing to say?

You're not gonna say anything?

I want you to swear on our relationship

that you will never ever cheat on me again.

- Swear. - I don't want to.

Swear on our relationship!

- I don't want to. - Do it!

- I don't want to. - You're a fucking idiot.

Why would you do this to me?

Look at me. I'm fucking hot!

You could have had everything. You could have had all of this.

You just fucking threw it away

with your stupid stupid text messaging!

You're just a...

just an asshole, Sebastian!

Do you want your phone back? 'Cause you're not gonna get it.

I'm gonna keep it. I'm confiscating it.

- Give me my phone back. - No, can't have it.

- No, fuck off. - Give me my phone back.

- You're not getting it back. - Give me my phone back.

Get on your stupid little fucking bike

and get out of my life, 'cause I'm sick of you.

And take your fucking phone and go home.

I fucking hate you forever.

You're a fucking asshole,

and thanks for breaking my heart, you fuckwit!

I dumped him!

- I dumped him! - Oh my God!

Come sit down. Sit down.

- He cheated on me! - Boys are so immature. It's okay.

He's made me feel less hot.

- No, Ja'mie. - Don't let him ruin what you are.

- You are so gorgeous. - Am I hot?

- Yes! - You are hot.

- You are totally... - Am I hot?

- Yes! - You're so beautiful.

I'm left wondering whether it's worthwhile me organizing

these sort of things for the kids.

What do you gotta say to yourself?

Can't even dance without fucking it up?

Don't worry. I'll give him a hiding tonight.

- Let's go. - We'll leave that with you.

What are you bloody wearing? You look like a poof.

Shut up. Don't call me a poof.

The great thing about it is you've got drugs, you've got youth suicide,

you've got anorexia, dealing with all "youth" issues.

The kids can connect with it, can relate to it...

The school is in for an amazing experience.

I now have a show that is so important and so now.

...the show will be set at Summer Heights High,

so we'll have familiar characters.

We'll touch on my involvement

in Annabel's life as one of her teachers...

Margaret's quietly confident.

And she's usually got a good eye for the next big thing,

so she seems very pumped.

My only issue is I want it to be done tastefully

- and not to exploit her. - We're on the same page then, Margaret.

♪ She can't help being a slut ♪

♪ On a Saturday night ♪

♪ Ecstasy Ecstasy ♪

♪ E E E E Ecstasy. ♪

Maybe we can donate the proceeds to the family or a youth charity.

No, that's where you're wrong.

We're going to put the money

into the Performing Arts Center,

back into the drama department that she loved so much.

♪ Days like these ♪

♪ It's a Bummer Heights High... ♪

I've got a feeling this musical could be my finest moment.

♪ Bummer Heights High ♪

♪ That Annabel died. ♪

She accidentally sent it. Find some new friends.

Build a bridge and get over it.

They've gone around the whole school telling everyone I'm a bitch.

Why would I want to be friends with you anyway, you lesbian curly-haired bitch?

...fucking cow!

"Ooh, look at my fringe. Oooh, Asian Asian!"

Why don't you go fuck yourself, public-school bitch?

Mom, it's me. I'm really upset!

I am not saying sorry!

I've got Jonah on an anger management course.

Get fucked. I know how to manage my fucking anger!

Fuck you, miss. Not you.

Write, "Do you love my dick?"

Put him next to good students, he copies their work.

What do you think this is, idiot?

Probably have to call your father.

I've asked you here to address this issue.

Just stop doing what you're doing.

We're in audition week. Ooh!

I really want to recreate the atmosphere

of an inner-city nightclub.

You've got a face like a bloody horse.

How's that making you feel, boys?

♪ I'm a naughty girl with a bad habit... ♪

You're in the show, everyone! Hug me!

I'm a fucking private-school girl!

Guys, I can't breathe.

Stick your fucking cup of tea up your ass.

How do you spell "fuck him up"?

♪... at Summer Heights High. ♪