Original subtitles

- C.J.: Get up and help your mom with the twins.

- Come on, Dad, she's got it.

She's woman, hear her roar. Roar.

- That boy think he know everything.

- You were the same way. - Was I?

- Were you? - Yes, you were.

- I got four kids, and you about to have one.

- MALIK: True, we all make mistakes.

- You done brought her in here,

you're gonna have a child together.

- This is going to be hard,

but you've gotta figure it out.

- We don't know each other.

You don't be understanding me.

- We got married, and I was pregnant with Malik.

And we made it through.

- We'll figure this out together, right?

- Yeah, we're gonna be great parents.

- I know I'm gonna be laughing when I get the TV on.

Get the batteries out. - Come on. Come on.

Hey!

- Hey.

- MIRANDA: Come on.

- You're just gonna walk in?

- Is Ms. Ella here?

- Nope.

- Don't you wanna say hi to your grandson?

- Nope.

- Uncle Curtis.

- Well, I--I met him before.

Hey, little man.

What you doing?

- You are not right.

- Come here.

What's your name?

I said what's name, man? - MIRANDA: [laughs]

- Hi. - Yeah!

What's his name?

- You don't know his-- this is your grandson.

- Yeah, I can't remember.

- Are you really acting like that?

- I'm acting like my son is divorcing you.

- I know that.

- So why are you here?

- Because I need to talk to Ms. Ella.

I need a babysitter.

- She's not here, and she cannot babysit.

- Well--well, how 'bout you? Can you?

- Can I what?

- Babysit.

- But, girl, no!

Going somewhere with that.

No, not anybody babysit.

- Okay. - What?

I got somewhere I gotta go.

- MIRANDA: Well-- - I'll go do too.

- Tell him! - Okay, okay.

- Tell him.

- Now he wanna tell me his name.

- Well, say, "Where are we supposed to go?"

- I don't know where you all going, but I got places to be.

- Where?

- At my house alone.

- [unintelligible]

- Oh, I know he did.

- Okay, look, Uncle Curtis,

I have a really big client who just called last minute.

Please.

- You know what you gotta do?

You need to call that really big client

at the last moment, let him know you ain't gonna make it.

- Please?

- Where--where is his daddy?

Where's his daddy? - He's--he's at work.

- Pbbft!

Your daddy ain't got no job!

- Yes, he does.

He's at work, and I need a babysitter.

- Miranda, I can't watch him.

- Why not? - Why not?

- Yes, why not? Ask him, "Grandpa, please."

- Don't you put him like that into this.

- Can you do the sad face we practice?

Look. Look at Mommy.

Look at Mommy. - CURTIS: Oh my Lord.

- Please.

Please. - Okay.

- Oh. - I can't--I can't--

I didn't wanna tell you this,

I got whooping cough.

[coughs] - What?

- You know, you can't have no kids around it.

You don't want that precious little child around that.

- Well, why didn't you tell me that?

- 'Cause I didn't want you worried about me, Miranda.

[coughing]

- MELINDA: Okay. - I'm about to hoof.

- Okay, okay, I'm leaving. - CURTIS: Okay.

Save your life and take your life with you.

- Can you tell Aunt Ella that I called, please?

- [gasps] - Oh, no, no, no, no.

No, no, no, no. - CURTIS: [gasping]

I'm sorry!

I'm sorry, Miranda!

- ♪

♪

♪♪

- I wanna show you something. Come on.

Come on, right over here.

Yeah.

There you go. - What is this?

- Well, this is a stove.

- I know that's a stove.

- Well, you just left it? What--

- What do you want me to do with it?

- I would love for you to cook.

- Uh, Malik, I'm the one that's pregnant.

- Yes, I know that.

But we gotta be in this thing together.

- Uh, am I missing something?

You ain't carrying no baby.

You ain't gonna get no stretch marks or nothing.

Am I missing something?

- Yeah. Yeah, you are.

- What am I missing?

- Dinner.

- Hold up.

Where is this coming from?

- What do you mean? My mom cooks for my dad.

- And?

- And my aunt cooks for my uncle.

- Well, I'm neither one of them people.

And they old.

- Well, look, we gonna have to figure something out.

- Hey, this is what I'm gonna figure out.

I'm gonna go lay on that couch, you cook.

- Excuse me?

- That's where I'll be.

- Son? - You know what?

I'm not about to put up with this.

- Son? - Yes?

- Leave it alone.

- What do you mean? - Just what I said.

- Dad, she's got to do something.

- She's not doing anything?

- No, she just living here... rent free.

Doing nothing. Look at her.

Ain't paying no bills.

Ain't cooking nothing.

It's just pathetic.

I'm doing all this studying here, slaving.

- Uh, son? - Yeah?

- This my house. - True.

- And you know what you need?

A job.

You're 'bout to be working.

- What? - C.J.: Yeah.

I got you a job.

- Dad, come on.

- Look, you 'bout to have a baby coming.

And I don't want no part of that.

- What do you mean? You're the grandfather.

- Boy, I am too young and too sexy to be a grandfather.

What I meant was, I don't want no part

of taking care of your kid.

- [scoffs] Dad, come on.

- M-Malik, what--what did you think?

Were you thinking this was gonna be easy?

- No, actually, I wasn't.

- Well, that's what's being a father is.

You gotta take responsibility and do the right thing.

- But, Dad, I'm letting her live her life.

- This is our house!

- Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, I got that.

I got that.

- You ain't paying no damn bills here.

- I got that too, alright.

- So, what you gonna do, you're gonna get this job,

and you're gonna go out and you're gonna get

your own apartment--you and her.

- [scoffs] Come on, Dad.

- No, no, no, I'm serious.

They gonna see you tomorrow at noon,

so get to cooking, and then go in there

and rub your soon-to-be wife's feet.

- I got to rub her feet?

- That's what being a daddy is.

You rub feet.

- But, Dad, her feet are not that nice.

- You chose them feet.

- [knocking at door]

- Somebody go get the door.

I'm gonna go tee-tee.

- Y'all don't do nothing.

Come in.

- Come on, baby. Come on, baby.

Hi. - Hey. Come on in.

- Ooh, thank you so much.

- Sure. Sure.

- I'm so grateful that you could watch him.

- Yeah. Yeah. Yes, I can.

- I would call Calvin, but he's at work.

- No, no, it's fine. We can watch him.

- Are you sure it's not too much?

- No. No, not at all.

- MIRANDA: Okay.

Alright.

Can you please not tell Calvin?

- I won't say a word.

- MIRANDA: Okay.

Thank you so much.

- Sure. Sure.

And take your time. - Really?

- Yeah, no rush to get back.

- Okay, C.J., you-- I can't believe

that are so kind. Thank you so much.

- Thank you. I try. - BOTH: [laughs]

- Okay, I'm gonna go, okay? - Okay.

- Bye-bye. Mommy'll see you later.

Hugs. Hugs.

Oh, thank you, baby. I love you.

Thank you, C.J.

See you soon. Stay here with Uncle C.J.

Okay. - Hey! Christian!

What's happening, buddy?

- Who is this?

- This is Christian. - What?

- Well, um, what's he doing here?

- Well...

you two will be babysitting.

- Wait, what? - Yes.

- Uh, no, Dad. - Yes.

- We have things to do.

- C.J.: I know.

But first you gonna find out what it's like to raise a baby.

- Uh, come on, you gotta be kidding me.

- C.J.: Now, you two, enjoy yourselves.

- Oh.

Wait, where are you going?

- I'm going out for awhile.

- Well, you gotta be kidding me.

- Boy!

- What are we supposed to do with him?

- Get ready.

- Get him ready--Dad, what are you doing?

Take him. Dad.

- And don't forget.

The twins are upstairs taking a nap.

- Oh, what?

Oh, you gotta be kidding me.

- See ya!

- I don't know what to do with him.

Oh God, I smell something.

Please take him. - Hmm-mm.

- Take him. Take him.

- Hmm-hmm. - Take him.

- CURTIS: [laughing]

- Hi.

- Bye.

Where you been?

- At the Help Center, babe.

- Oh, you gonna thank me.

- Thank you for what?

- That girl came over here.

- What girl came over here?

- You know, the one with the kid.

- What woman with the kid?

- Miranda.

- Oh, well, what did she want?

- Baby, you ain't gonna believe this.

- What?

- She wanted me to babysit.

- What?

- Uh, right.

- Okay, wait a minute, I gotta call her.

She don't know that child.

- Who is that child?

- Curtis, that is your grandchild.

- Who had him?

- She had him.

She was married to Calvin, your only child.

Which gives you your only grandchild.

- You know she's trying to take all his money, right?

- Curtis, Calvin don't have no money.

- Duh.

I know.

And if she take half of that,

you know what gonna happen.

- Baby, if she take half of nothing,

what's gonna happen?

- You know what's gonna happen.

- If she-- - He gonna be trying

living here.

- Let me call her right back.

- What are you calling for? You ain't gotta call her.

- Baby, please, please. - Oh, baby, you are the worst.

- The worst? - That's not what--

- Hey, hey, hey, Miranda.

It's me. - Ooh.

- Hey. Yes. What?

- She lying.

- Oh, no, no, no.

You know what? I don't mind, but--

- Oh, don't you say that.

Don't you say that. - I would have loved to.

- Will you stop lying?

- Oh, you know I love my little grandbaby.

[clicking] Kiss him for me.

- She lying, Randa. - You know, he loves him too.

Yes, he does. - Yeah,

you know that ain't right.

- He's just being silly.

You know Curtis.

- Uh, you ain't talking to nobody.

- You okay, baby? Okay.

Alright, I'll see you later.

- Miranda, say something. - [laughs]

- CURTIS: Say something, Miranda.

- Oh, I heard him. - What she say, Ella?

- Why do you care?

- I have a heart.

- Is that what you call it?

Is that what you call it?

- That hurts me, Ella.

I care about them--them kids.

Did she find a babysitter? - Yes, she did.

- Who? - ELLA: C.J.

- C.J. fell for that mess?

- Curtis, she needed help.

- You know what? Y'all getting weak.

Y'all getting weak.

- Curtis, that is a helpless child.

- That is not.

- What you mean that is-- - That ba--

I look in that baby's eyes, Ella.

- Okay.

- That baby's a little charmer.

- How do you know?

- Look at me.

- That's why I asked.

How do you know?

[laughing]

- Too bad you're the only one laughing.

- [knocking at door] - Come in!

- I'm missing my show. - It's C.J.

- Don't say "Come in." - Come on in!

Hey. - Could be somebody else

with a kid. - Hello.

- Hi, there. - Hi.

- Okay, what--what are you doing here?

- I just came by.

- I thought you were babysitting.

- No.

- Miranda said you were.

- No.

- You left the baby over there by itself?

- No.

- Yeah, that's something I would have did.

- I know. - Curtis.

- And it wouldn't be right.

- No, it wouldn't be right.

- That's why I do it.

- No, he's at the house with Malik and Lisa.

I'm giving them a taste of what it will be like.

- Oh. That's good. - [laughing]

- That's good. - Start 'em young, boy.

Start 'em young. - Uh-huh.

- You give him some ones?

- Curtis!

That's not what I'm talking about.

- With the tens?

- I left 'em with the twins, too.

- Oh, don't you stay over here too long, 'cause I wanna

make sure that they are being looked after the right way.

- No, I'm just gonna stay for about 30 minutes,

and then I'll get back over there.

- I know those kids are giving them the business.

- I'm sure they are.

- It's 29 minutes.

I set the timer.

Wait a--wait--'cause I want you gone.

- ♪

- [kids chattering] - You gotta do something.

- Me? - Yes, you!

- I don't know what to do. Cut it out.

- You've been living with these kids how long

and you don't know how to calm them down?

- Aren't you the-- whoa.

Throw that over there.

Aren't you the one gonna have a baby?

- I ain't never had one before!

- Isn't your motherly instinct supposed to kick in

or something? I don't know. - LISA: Huh-uh.

Huh-uh. - Alright. alright.

Kids!

Kids, just--

catch him, he trying to break out!

- Hey.

- It's--it's not working.

- I know, I don't know what I'm doing.

I tried to tell you. - CHRISTIAN: No!

- What?

Sit. - Huh?

- Oh.

Sit up. - Just--

And stay there.

Freeze. - MALIK: There you go.

- CHRISTIAN: Freeze. - Freeze.

No? Just--

Well, you deal with it.

I'm going upstairs.

- What? You can't just leave me like this!

- I don't know them!

- Wait, Lisa!

- That little one, he real Chucky like.

- This is crazy!

- I know, right, these kids is out of control!

- Then, please, help me!

They're about to break something!

- You better call on the Lord, maybe he'll calm 'em down.

- ♪

- Okay.

- ♪

- You wanna play with this?

[unintelligible]

- ♪

- MALIK: What are you doing? Stop it.

Oh my gosh, I'm feeling violent.

Cut it out!

Alright, everybody, sit down!

You're still standing! Just sit down!

- ♪

- You want snacks? We could get snacks.

It's snack time.

No. Oh, stop!

- [kids chattering] - Oh, Dad.

Thank God you're back.

- Hey.

How you doing?

- I'm not doing good. Look at this mess.

- And what did you do?

- I don't know what to do.

- Well, you better learn.

You got one coming. - [scoffs]

Dad, am I even ready for this?

- No. Not at all.

- Well, were you ready?

- No, but I was older than you.

I had a job.

And I was more prepared.

- Yeah, I know. I know.

You keep saying that.

- Well, I hope you can see it now.

Look at this. - Yeah.

Believe me, I've been hit enough, I know.

- Where's Lisa?

- She's upstairs.

She just left me with these little demons.

- They're not demons.

They're angels. They-- they your brother and sister.

And cousin.

Look, look, look, they are a lot of single people

raising children.

And it helps if you got a partner that wants to help you.

- Well, that's not her.

- Well, that's something y'all need to talk about.

- Yeah. Yeah, I guess you're right.

- Yeah.

Now I'm gonna take the kids upstairs and read a book.

- Uh, good luck trying to do that.

- Hey!

Front and center.

Now we gonna go upstairs and we gonna read a book.

Okay?

- Hey, why y'all didn't do that for me?

- Uh, I got a question. Did they eat?

- Yeah, they ate everything in the kitchen.

- You let 'em eat all that sugar?

- Well, that's what they wanted.

- That's why they're bouncing all over the walls.

Come on, kids, let's go upstairs.

Christian! Let's go, buddy.

- Mm. No.

Play with the box. - Ah!

Here we go! Ah, you see that?

You see that? - Yeah.

Wait, how did you get them to do that?

- I'm a dad.

Let's go, buddy. - No.

- C.J.: Lisa, your man wanna talk to you.

- ♪

- ♪

- Them little kids is something else.

I don't know about that baby.

I mean, he like the seed of something.

[whispers] Chucky.

Hi. Hi.

- Look, you really left me down here.

Look, we need to talk about this.

- You mad?

Look, why we can't do what your daddy just did?

- We're not my dad.

- Whatever.

I'm hungry. What you cook for dinner?

- What would make you think I would have time to cook?

Look at this!

Lisa, look, we need to talk.

- I know, ri-i-ight.

- You know I love you.

- And I love you too. - Come on.

This ain't gonna work if we ain't on the same page.

- What? You breaking up with me?

- No, no, I'm just saying, look, we need to be

on the same page. - Oh, okay, what that mean?

- Well, first, I'm gonna need you to pitch in

around here.

- Wait, you want me to go back to work on the pole?

- No, no, that's not what I'm saying.

- 'Cause I do have a job.

I'm baking this baby.

- I know. I know that.

But you're not disabled.

- Yes, I am.

That's what pregnancy is.

- No. Look, I'm gonna need you to help out

around the house, do some chores,

and help with the kids.

- That's a lot.

I think I'd rather go back to work.

I done seen pregnant girls on the pole before.

- No, no, look, that's not what I'm talking about.

- I know you didn't want me to do that.

- No, I didn't.

- Then what you mean?

You gotta be plain.

- Uh, my gosh, she's playing mental gymnastics with me.

- Don't be using them big old words with me.

Gym-nas-isis.

- Guh, you know what? [laughs]

Never mind. Never mind.

- Okay, can I go find something to eat then?

- Yeah, yeah, you do you.

- Okay.

- [sighs] Oh my God.

- Who gonna clean all this up?

- Lord, please help me.

Guide my tongue, oh Lord.

[laughs]

- ♪

- ♪

- ♪