Original subtitles

So you sure you don't need anything before me

and your unc go back home?

Malik!

Uh-- no, no, no.

I'm good.

Thanks for visiting.

Well, hey, wait a minute now.

Why are you rushing me?

I just want to make sure that you get home before the street

lights come on.

Oh, I see.

We throwing salt in your game.

You're embarrassed.

No.

Hey, Lik!

I got your future wife.

Yeah.

Now why would I be embarrassed?

I would like to introduce you to Savannah.

Guess where she's from?

Savannah.

Biology major.

Single.

Well, hello.

Uh-- this is my nephew, Malik.

Romance major.

Single.

A little desperate.

Wait. Hold on.

Savannah!

Savannah!

Malik, what are you doing?

You're letting her get away.

Come on, man!

We're trying to teach you from the Payne Player Handbook!

Chapter 1-- The Art of Tearing That A Up!

He-- he ain't ready for that chapter.

No.

Look, I am ready.

I just don't need your help.

Sup?

My boy!

I saw-- I caught that right there.

You see?

He got it.

He got it in him.

All right, Malik!

So you finally took my advise, huh?

Yeah.

And it got me slapped in the cafeteria.

Uh-- but you know, actually, I'm thinking

about pledging a fraternity.

That's all the swag I need.

Malik Phi Lik!

[grunting]

That's what I'm talk--

[grunting]

Yeah.

Uh-- now why would I be embarrassed?

I'll meet you in the car.

[grunting]

Listen, uh-- sorry.

Sorry about that.

That's-- that's his uncle.

Well, son, you sure you're ready to join a fraternity?

Well, yeah.

It should be fun.

And you know, a lot of prominent men

join frats when they go to college.

Like who?

Well, uh-- Martin Luther King Jr.,

Charles Drew, Johnnie Cochran.

And what about those idiot frat

boys that stole the fire truck?

Now that was pretty hilarious.

And so very wrong.

Malik, you are not in school to waste our money.

We spend a lot on room and board.

Look, if I make it as a pledge,

then I get to live on campus for free.

Free, free?

Yeah.

Free thousand, free hundred dollars, and free-teen cents.

All right.

Look, man, as long as you don't make a fool of yourself

and you stay away from those wild parties.

I got it, dad-- no wild parties.

What you know about--

[grunting]

Now why would I be embarrassed?

[music playing]

Woo!

This beat has got me bent!

Oh, bring the Payne, my brothers!

Bring the Payne!

[theme music]

[music playing]

Hey, Malik!

You need to get down, man!

The brothers are watching you, dude.

Yeah.

And I'm watching the ladies.

Hey, how you doing?

Looks like you need a little Payne in your life.

No, man.

I mean the Omega Sigma Rho brothers are watching you.

Yeah.

Well, maybe they can learn a little something.

Hey, so, uh-- I heard this is your favorite song

and I'm about to be your favorite freshman.

Come on.

Hey, here they come. Here they come.

You need to go. Bye, bye.

See you.

What's up, guys?

I'm Drew, President of Omega Sigma Rho.

Sebastian Gardner, sir.

I wanted to meet you for like ever!

I'm Malik Payne.

Oh, you mean, Bring The Payne, right?

Well, sometimes I go by that.

I don't like to brag, but, uh--

I can bring it every now and then.

Right.

So what do you guys think of the party?

Well, I think you could turn it up a little bit.

Well, I-- I think it's off the rope.

You mean off the chain?

That, too.

You know, our fraternity is not just about lunacy

and debauchery.

Well, then you are not trying hard enough.

You wouldn't be here if you weren't interested in joining,

right?

Absolutely.

I 100% cannot wait to--

Dude!

I'm just going to go.

What about you?

Well, I'm still a little bit undecided

on if I'm going to join or not.

I haven't been convinced yet.

So, uh-- what else did your fraternity do?

We, uh-- mentor young men, like yourselves.

And we also have a strong impact on the community.

Hey-- hey, where are they going?

They're going streaking.

Oh, hey! Come on, Malik!

Uh-- no.

I'm not going to be running down the street in my underwear

with some guys.

They're going, too.

Um-- where can I sign up?

As of now, you all are officially

pledges of Omega Sigma Rho.

Congratulations.

Well, bring on the streakers on the debauchery.

Fall in line!

You will address me as Big Brother Drew Nasty!

Oh, my.

Who is he talking to? - Shh.

Part of the process.

Get in line.

You pledges will do what I say, when I say.

And you will learn the following greeting--

[SINGING] Big Brother Drew--

zoom, zoom, zoom-- what must they do--

zoom, zoom, zoom-- to be just like you?

Oh, please! Oh, please!

Oh, please!

Just get down to the knees, sir!

Now you say it, backwards.

Sir.

Drew, brother, please, please, please,

break my knees, knees, knees.

Now you say it backwards.

Oh, please, Big Brother, what must I do to be just like you?

You think you smart, pledge?

Tell me your name again.

Uh-- Malik Payne.

No.

Your nickname.

And say it with some enthusiasm like you had last night.

Oh!

Bring The Pain, Big Brother!

Well, if you insist.

Hey, yo, Woody.

Woody, my brother, someone says they want to bring the pain.

Big Brother, sir!

He didn't know what he was talking about, sir!

Oh, really?

Then how about you take his pain?

Oh, no, no. I--

Shut up, pledge.

You think you're in charge?

No, sir.

Assume the position.

Wha--

Now!

Uh-- yes, sir.

Woody, if you would, please.

[paddle smacking]

[screaming]

Say the wood feels good, Big Brother.

The wood feels good, Big Brother.

[paddle smacking]

[groaning]

The wood feels good, Big Brother.

[paddle smacking]

[shrieking]

The wood feels good, Big Brother.

[paddle smacking]

[screaming]

The wood feels good, Big Brother.

Wait.

Where's Sebastian?

We were supposed to meet the Big Brothers here at 4:00.

I'm here.

Are you still limping from being paddled?

What can I say?

I mean, this is what it takes.

[puffing inhaler]

Is it really worth all that?

My dad and granddad were both in the frat.

And they pledged a lot harder than this.

Yeah.

Well, what did they do?

Build pyramids?

No.

Look, my dad built his business with his frat brother's help.

And, you know, they all did it and now

they're really successful.

Yeah.

And how many of them walk with a limp?

Just my granddad.

That's his [inaudible].

[yelling]

Tick-tock!

Tick-tock!

Someone check the time!

It's 4:00 in the morning, Big Brother.

And?

And all is well that ends well?

No.

It's 4:00 in the morning and 12 seconds, 13 seconds.

My, how time flies when I'm with my Big Brothers.

Now that's how you tell time, right there.

Now you tell me the time.

Big Brother, I forgot my watch.

I'm tired and I can't focus.

I understand.

Maybe some push ups will help you focus.

Drop down and give me 1,500.

- Push ups? - No.

Lollipops. What do you think?

I can't. Man, my--

All right. Quit.

Go home.

Tell your-- your daddy and your granddaddy

that you don't have what it takes.

You can't do what they did.

Mm hm.

Get down there, boy.

See, that's a real pledge right there.

The rest of you, grab a brick and don't put it down.

Not you, Payne.

No, you assume the position.

The other position.

You think this is a game?

Uh-- sir, no, sir.

You know what it takes to get in this frat?

Uh-- a cashier's check and a well written essay?

Blood, sweat, and tears!

Look at your frat brother down there, doing push ups.

That's what it takes.

Get up, pledge.

I said, get up!

Um-- I don't think he's breathing.

Let's go.

Uh-- Sebastian?

Sebastian!

Somebody, please, call 9-1-1!

Yo, Payne, let me talk to you for a second.

You know this is your fault, right?

What? What did I do you?

You were the one who was supposed

to be doing the push ups.

Yeah.

But you're the one who made him do it.

That's not what I saw, is it?

Is it?

Am I also the one who paddled him?

Paddle?

I don't see a paddle?

The one Woody's holding?

Who is Woody?

Are you-- are you feeling OK?

Let me give you some advice--

now you can keep your mouth shut and you'll be one of us

in a few weeks, or you can run your mouth

and everyone on the yard can find our you're a punk.

Hey, Big Brother Drew.

Hey, Sebastian.

You all right, man?

Yeah.

It's an asthma attack.

[coughing]

[puffing inhaler]

Um-- I think we better shut it down for the night.

Wait, wait, wait.

What?

I didn't get to hold a brick.

I can keep going. - What?

Are you crazy?

I don't know if you noticed or not,

you almost died doing eight push ups.

And what have you done, Payne?

You know, I should make you get down and--

Make him do what?

What's going on here?

Early morning study session.

I was talking to the students who aren't carrying any books.

Uh-- we were just, uh--

uh--

Morning calisthenics, sir.

I-- I kind of felt faint.

That's all.

Is that true?

So everybody's got the same story, is that right?

Yes, sir.

All for one, one for all.

So should I suspend one of you or all of you?

You got to go through something a little painful.

Like the military?

Like marriage.

It doesn't matter because when my dad gets home,

he's going to kill me.

Look, don't worry about your daddy, OK?

You did what you had to do, you heard?

Come on!

I got your back.

Uncle got your back!

Malik!

What were you thinking?

What the hell was you thinking?

And what if the dean decides to suspend you?

Speak up!

Unc, please.

OK.

I'll just step out here.

Uncle Curtis, you said you had my back.

I got-- I got--

I got your back.

Hey, C.J.!

What?

[WHISPERING] Don't forget a belt. Don't forget--

All right.

Why didn't you just walk away?

Well, look, they were hurting my pledge brother.

Damn the pledge brother.

What about school?

We talked about this.

I told you not to waste our money.

Now you're about to get kicked out your freshman year.

Wha-- what do you want me to do?

I want you to find a solution.

We didn't raise you like this.

Look, I can't keep running behind, trying

to take care of your problems.

Can't you just one more time?

For old times sake?

No, Malik.

You made the decision to join the frat,

then you got yourself in trouble.

You're going to have to make a decision

to get yourself out of it.

What if I can't do it?

Then I'm going to have to come up there to that campus

and jump on them frats myself.

Do you want that?

Uh-- yeah.

Oh.

[coughing]

[puffing inhaler]

Yo, Malik!

Where you been?

Oh, did you have your discipline hearing with Dr. Mitchell?

Yeah.

I told him that I was going to get my butt kicked.

Why would you do that?

I mean, the brothers aren't going to haze

us anymore, right, guys?

Uh-- no.

I was talking about my dad.

I mean, this will all blow over.

What?

Blow over?

We might get suspended.

Look, this happens at campuses every year.

It's not that big of a deal.

Yeah-- well, tell that to them.

Tick-tock!

Tick-tock!

What time is it?

Uh-- it is eight minutes after midnight, Big--

No.

No.

It's time we settle some unfinished business.

When we last left our pledges, they were in the midst

of some mighty good wood.

Let's tune in and see what happens this week.

But, uh-- what about the suspension?

How could there be a suspension

if no one said anything?

Assume the position.

Now!

What-- I can't let you do it.

It's not right. - What?

No. It's OK, Malik.

I can do it, man. - No!

It's not OK, all right?

You can't keep picking on him.

He's in enough pain, uh--

Big Brother.

You're right.

What was I thinking?

He has suffered enough.

So you assume the position or I'll take

it out on all the rest of them.

Now!

Oh, I'm sorry, I was just thinking.

Now what we have here, gentlemen,

is a failure to communicate.

Bring The Pain is about to get the pain.

Oh, Father that art in heaven--

No.

Let me here you say the wood is good.

The pine is divine.

Now this is going to hurt you a lot more

than it's going to hurt me.

Uh-- give me some space.

What's going on here?

Ow!

You stupid or are just stupid, huh?

Sweet Jesus!

Oh, thank you, mom!

Oh, I love you, the Easter bunny.

Woo!

Malik, I'm sorry I didn't get here any sooner.

Oh, no.

You got here just in enough time.

You, boys-- you're coming with me.

Now we're never going to get in!

You snitched!

Well, look, if taking care of my pledge brothers

is snitching, then, yeah, I am a snitch.

Now what am I going to tell my granddad and my dad?

Man!

Malik?

Oh, hey, Dr. Mitchell.

Coffee?

Uh-- no, thank you.

Look, son, I want you to know that you did the right thing.

Did I?

Because I just can't believe people

would put themselves through something like that.

Hey, what kind of idiot would do that?

Well, you are looking at one of those idiots.

You're in a fraternity?

I'm Omega Sigma Rho.

Pledged in the spring of 1975.

Well, if you had the chance to do it all over again,

would you?

Look, son, despite what happened here,

I don't want you to get the wrong idea about fraternities.

They have a rich history on college campuses

all across the country and they do serve the community well.

Well, what's going to happen to Omega Sigma Rho?

Are they suspended?

No, but it'll be a while before they

have another pledge class.

What?

Like till next semester?

Try next century.

I'm proud of you, son.

Malik, you did the right thing, buddy.

Thanks.

I'm just doing what you taught me.

So you still want to join a frat?

Well, you know, I've actually been thinking about it.

And I don't know.

Maybe.

Then go bus them dishes.

What?

And after you get done with that, I need you to wash my car

and shine my shoes.

But dad, I got to go back to school.

Why are you doing this?

Because I'm pledging you into the Dad Frat!

Now drop down and give me 20.

$20?

20 push ups!

OK.

Dad, look, I really think that--

Woo.

I can see you.