All language subtitles for Tyler Perrys House of Payne - S05E18 - Paul Mall WEBDL-1080p_track3_[eng]

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:09,700 CALVIN? 2 00:00:09,700 --> 00:00:10,700 YEAH. 3 00:00:10,700 --> 00:00:12,567 WHAT'S THAT IN THE BATHROOM? 4 00:00:12,567 --> 00:00:15,267 A TUB? A SINK? 5 00:00:15,267 --> 00:00:16,300 HMM... 6 00:00:16,300 --> 00:00:17,767 NO, NO, NO. THE TOILET. 7 00:00:17,767 --> 00:00:19,267 I'M SORRY. 8 00:00:19,267 --> 00:00:20,900 NO. IT'S YOUR WET TOWEL. 9 00:00:20,900 --> 00:00:22,033 OH, MAN, I WAS SO CLOSE. 10 00:00:22,033 --> 00:00:23,233 YOU GOT TO GIVE ME CREDIT ON 11 00:00:23,233 --> 00:00:23,867 THAT. 12 00:00:23,867 --> 00:00:25,900 HMM. YOU'RE SO FUNNY TODAY. 13 00:00:25,900 --> 00:00:28,067 I-IT'S A LITTLE BIT FUNNY. 14 00:00:28,067 --> 00:00:29,400 DO YOU KNOW WHERE I FOUND 15 00:00:29,400 --> 00:00:30,800 YOUR TOWEL, CALVIN? 16 00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:32,300 OH. OOH, OKAY. OKAY. 17 00:00:32,300 --> 00:00:33,600 DON'T TELL ME, DON'T TELL ME. 18 00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:36,500 UH, UH, IT WAS PROBABLY NEXT TO 19 00:00:36,500 --> 00:00:37,633 THE BED. 20 00:00:37,633 --> 00:00:38,600 NO. 21 00:00:38,600 --> 00:00:40,567 ON THE FLOOR IN THE BATHROOM, 22 00:00:40,567 --> 00:00:41,167 AGAIN. 23 00:00:41,167 --> 00:00:42,367 WELL, BABE, I WOULD HAVE HUNG 24 00:00:42,367 --> 00:00:43,900 IT ON THE SHOWER ROD, BUT IT'S 25 00:00:43,900 --> 00:00:45,067 FULL OF YOUR PANTYHOSE. 26 00:00:45,067 --> 00:00:46,300 WELL, WHERE ELSE AM I 27 00:00:46,300 --> 00:00:47,800 SUPPOSED TO PUT THEM, CALVIN? 28 00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:49,400 HOW ABOUT THE TOWEL RACK? 29 00:00:49,400 --> 00:00:50,400 I'M NOT USING IT. 30 00:00:50,400 --> 00:00:51,400 [ LAUGHS ] 31 00:00:51,400 --> 00:00:54,533 I KILL MYSELF. I'M GOOD. 32 00:00:54,533 --> 00:00:56,033 YOU KNOW, IT'S REALLY NOT 33 00:00:56,033 --> 00:00:57,000 FUNNY. 34 00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:58,667 WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE LIVING 35 00:00:58,667 --> 00:01:00,833 HERE TOGETHER, SHARING THIS 36 00:01:00,833 --> 00:01:02,767 HOME, AND YOU CONTINUE TO BE 37 00:01:02,767 --> 00:01:03,433 INCONSIDERATE. 38 00:01:03,433 --> 00:01:04,633 I MEAN, HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I 39 00:01:04,633 --> 00:01:05,733 ASKED YOU TO PUT DOWN THE 40 00:01:05,733 --> 00:01:06,867 TOILET SEAT IN THE BATHROOM? 41 00:01:06,867 --> 00:01:07,567 FIVE, RIGHT? 42 00:01:07,567 --> 00:01:08,967 AND FIVE TIMES, I HAVE FALLEN 43 00:01:08,967 --> 00:01:10,167 INTO THE TOILET, CALVIN. 44 00:01:10,167 --> 00:01:11,433 THAT IS NASTY. IT'S COLD. 45 00:01:11,433 --> 00:01:13,267 OKAY. OKAY, OKAY, OKAY. 46 00:01:13,267 --> 00:01:14,267 [ GROANS ] 47 00:01:14,267 --> 00:01:16,733 I'LL REMEMBER. I'LL WORK ON IT. 48 00:01:16,733 --> 00:01:17,900 MAN! 49 00:01:17,900 --> 00:01:19,667 HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY! 50 00:01:19,667 --> 00:01:20,967 YOU DRANK MY ORANGE JUICE? 51 00:01:20,967 --> 00:01:22,633 [ LAUGHS ] 52 00:01:22,633 --> 00:01:25,467 UM, YOUR ORANGE JUICE? 53 00:01:25,467 --> 00:01:26,367 YES, MY ORANGE JUICE. 54 00:01:26,367 --> 00:01:27,600 HOW YOU GONNA LEAVE A SWALLOW IN 55 00:01:27,600 --> 00:01:28,233 THE CONTAINER? 56 00:01:28,233 --> 00:01:29,333 I NEED MORE THAN A SWALLOW. 57 00:01:29,333 --> 00:01:30,300 WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? 58 00:01:30,300 --> 00:01:31,433 CALVIN, I DIDN'T SEE YOUR 59 00:01:31,433 --> 00:01:33,567 NAME ON THE ORANGE JUICE. 60 00:01:33,567 --> 00:01:36,567 CAN YOU READ? CAN YOU READ? 61 00:01:36,567 --> 00:01:38,400 ARE YOU SERIOUS? 62 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:39,867 OKAY, FIRST OF ALL, WHO WRITES 63 00:01:39,867 --> 00:01:41,067 THEIR NAME ON THE BOTTOM, 64 00:01:41,067 --> 00:01:41,500 CALVIN? 65 00:01:41,500 --> 00:01:44,133 I DID IT 'CAUSE YOU'RE SHORT. 66 00:01:44,133 --> 00:01:45,833 AND BY THE WAY, WHAT GROWN 67 00:01:45,833 --> 00:01:47,533 MAN WRITES THEIR NAME ON THE 68 00:01:47,533 --> 00:01:48,967 ORANGE-JUICE CONTAINER? 69 00:01:48,967 --> 00:01:51,533 WELL, WHAT GROWN WOMAN HANGS 70 00:01:51,533 --> 00:01:52,800 THEIR BRA FROM THE DOORKNOB? 71 00:01:52,800 --> 00:01:54,167 WELL, I'VE ALWAYS DONE THAT. 72 00:01:54,167 --> 00:01:55,467 AND I'VE ALWAYS WRITTEN MY 73 00:01:55,467 --> 00:01:56,533 NAME ON THE ORANGE JUICE. 74 00:01:56,533 --> 00:01:57,533 OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT? 75 00:01:57,533 --> 00:01:58,733 YOU NEED TO STOP CHANGING THE 76 00:01:58,733 --> 00:02:00,600 SUBJECT. 77 00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:04,233 OH, YOU MAD, HUH? 78 00:02:04,233 --> 00:02:05,833 I'M GLAD THAT YOU THINK THIS 79 00:02:05,833 --> 00:02:06,500 IS FUNNY. 80 00:02:06,500 --> 00:02:08,467 BUT YES, I AM REALLY MAD BECAUSE 81 00:02:08,467 --> 00:02:10,267 WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE LIVING 82 00:02:10,267 --> 00:02:12,267 TOGETHER, COMING TOGETHER, AND 83 00:02:12,267 --> 00:02:13,533 THAT'S NOT WHAT'S GOING ON HERE. 84 00:02:13,533 --> 00:02:14,833 OKAY, I UNDERSTAND THAT, BUT 85 00:02:14,833 --> 00:02:16,200 YOU NAGGING ME ABOUT STUFF, IT'S 86 00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:17,400 NOT GONNA CHANGE ANYTHING. 87 00:02:17,400 --> 00:02:18,800 OH, NO, YOU DIDN'T. 88 00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:20,300 NAGGING? NAGGING? 89 00:02:20,300 --> 00:02:21,267 I'M NAGGING YOU? 90 00:02:21,267 --> 00:02:22,933 NO, I'M TRYING TO OPEN YOUR EYES 91 00:02:22,933 --> 00:02:24,633 TO SEE THAT, YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU 92 00:02:24,633 --> 00:02:26,167 COULD MAYBE BE A LITTLE MORE 93 00:02:26,167 --> 00:02:27,233 CONSIDERATE SOMETIMES. 94 00:02:27,233 --> 00:02:28,467 SEE? THERE YOU GO. 95 00:02:28,467 --> 00:02:29,600 NAGGING. 96 00:02:29,600 --> 00:02:31,400 YOU KNOW, THIS ISN'T FAIR. 97 00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:33,067 I PICK UP AFTER YOU LIKE I'M 98 00:02:33,067 --> 00:02:33,967 YOUR MOTHER. 99 00:02:33,967 --> 00:02:35,300 WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, HOLD ON 100 00:02:35,300 --> 00:02:36,333 WITH ALL THIS MOTHER STUFF. 101 00:02:36,333 --> 00:02:37,500 YOU'RE NOT MY MOTHER, AND I'M 102 00:02:37,500 --> 00:02:38,067 NOT A CHILD. 103 00:02:38,067 --> 00:02:38,633 YOU KNOW WHAT? 104 00:02:38,633 --> 00:02:39,867 I DON'T NEED TO DEAL WITH THIS. 105 00:02:39,867 --> 00:02:40,833 I'M GOING TO WORK. 106 00:02:40,833 --> 00:02:42,967 OH, N-O-O-O. UNH-UNH. 107 00:02:42,967 --> 00:02:44,267 YOU'RE GONNA GO PICK UP THAT 108 00:02:44,267 --> 00:02:44,733 TOWEL. 109 00:02:44,733 --> 00:02:46,067 OH, N-O-O-O. 110 00:02:46,067 --> 00:02:48,700 UNH-UNH, I'M NOT. 111 00:02:48,900 --> 00:02:51,733 OH, YOU KNOW WHAT? UNH-UNH. 112 00:02:51,733 --> 00:02:53,567 YOU'RE GONNA PICK UP THAT TOWEL, 113 00:02:53,567 --> 00:02:54,533 CALVIN! 114 00:03:03,767 --> 00:03:06,600 OH, THERE YOU ARE. 115 00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:09,400 OKAY, BYE, BABE. GOING TO WORK. 116 00:03:09,400 --> 00:03:10,867 BABY, I'M NEVER GONNA GET 117 00:03:10,867 --> 00:03:12,133 USED TO YOU SAYING THAT. 118 00:03:12,133 --> 00:03:13,467 WELL, CURTIS, YOU BETTER 119 00:03:13,467 --> 00:03:15,267 START...BECAUSE YOU'RE GONNA 120 00:03:15,267 --> 00:03:15,767 BE... 121 00:03:15,767 --> 00:03:18,267 * HEARING IT A LOT 122 00:03:18,267 --> 00:03:19,400 [ LAUGHS ] 123 00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:20,567 OW. 124 00:03:20,567 --> 00:03:21,867 WHY YOU COULDN'T HAVE JUST 125 00:03:21,867 --> 00:03:22,867 GOT A PART-TIME JOB? 126 00:03:22,867 --> 00:03:24,200 WHY YOU GOT TO BE A MANAGER? 127 00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:26,067 WELL, THE OWNER SAW MY 128 00:03:26,067 --> 00:03:27,167 POTENTIAL, BABY. 129 00:03:27,167 --> 00:03:28,433 WELL, I'D LIKE TO POTENTIALLY 130 00:03:28,433 --> 00:03:29,567 WHUP HIS ASS. 131 00:03:29,567 --> 00:03:31,367 CURTIS, LISTEN. 132 00:03:31,367 --> 00:03:32,867 MAKE SURE YOU COME BY AT CLOSING 133 00:03:32,867 --> 00:03:34,700 TONIGHT, BECAUSE I HAVE TO DO 134 00:03:34,700 --> 00:03:36,533 ANOTHER DEPOSIT, OKAY? 135 00:03:36,733 --> 00:03:37,733 ALL RIGHT. 136 00:03:37,733 --> 00:03:39,567 THANK YOU. 137 00:03:39,567 --> 00:03:40,900 HEY, MOM. HOW YOU DOING? 138 00:03:40,900 --> 00:03:41,867 HEY, BABE. 139 00:03:41,867 --> 00:03:43,500 BYE, BABE. SEE YOU. 140 00:03:43,500 --> 00:03:45,500 WAIT. WHERE YOU GOING? 141 00:03:45,500 --> 00:03:47,333 I'M GOING TO WORK. 142 00:03:47,333 --> 00:03:48,667 I WILL NEVER GET USED TO HER 143 00:03:48,667 --> 00:03:49,333 SAYING THAT. 144 00:03:49,333 --> 00:03:50,833 HEY, HEY, DID YOU MAKE MY LUNCH? 145 00:03:50,833 --> 00:03:52,267 IT'S IN THE KITCHEN! 146 00:03:52,267 --> 00:03:53,900 WHAT'S UP, POPS? 147 00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:55,100 HOLD ON. HOLD ON. HOLD ON. 148 00:03:55,100 --> 00:03:56,200 YOU DIDN'T SEE THAT LITTLE 149 00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:57,400 BUTTON ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF THE 150 00:03:57,400 --> 00:03:58,467 DOOR? 151 00:03:58,467 --> 00:03:59,467 YEAH. 152 00:03:59,467 --> 00:04:00,733 IT'S CALLED A DOORBELL. 153 00:04:00,733 --> 00:04:02,067 IT'S FOR PEOPLE WHO DON'T LIVE 154 00:04:02,067 --> 00:04:03,067 HERE. 155 00:04:03,067 --> 00:04:04,167 DING-DONG! 156 00:04:04,167 --> 00:04:06,467 I JUST CAME TO GET MY LUNCH. 157 00:04:06,467 --> 00:04:08,067 WHY DON'T YOU EAT MIRANDA'S 158 00:04:08,067 --> 00:04:08,600 COOKING? 159 00:04:08,600 --> 00:04:10,567 I WANT TO LIVE. 160 00:04:10,567 --> 00:04:12,733 I KNOW IT TASTES LIKE BOOTY. 161 00:04:12,733 --> 00:04:13,900 [ LAUGHS ] 162 00:04:13,900 --> 00:04:15,233 I TOLD YOU NOT TO MARRY HER IN 163 00:04:15,233 --> 00:04:15,900 THE FIRST PLACE. 164 00:04:15,900 --> 00:04:17,067 TOLD YOU SHE COULDN'T COOK. 165 00:04:17,067 --> 00:04:18,367 I HOPE SHE GO TO SLEEP WITH HER 166 00:04:18,367 --> 00:04:19,500 MAKEUP ON HER FUNNY-LOOKING 167 00:04:19,500 --> 00:04:20,800 SELF. 168 00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:23,833 HEY -- HEY, BEAUTIFUL. 169 00:04:23,833 --> 00:04:25,833 UH, UM...HOW'S MY FAVORITE 170 00:04:25,833 --> 00:04:27,467 DAUGHTER-IN-LAW DOING? 171 00:04:27,467 --> 00:04:28,633 MR. PAYNE, I'M YOUR ONLY 172 00:04:28,633 --> 00:04:29,700 DAUGHTER-IN-LAW. 173 00:04:29,700 --> 00:04:30,600 GOOD MORNING. 174 00:04:30,600 --> 00:04:31,533 GOOD MORNING. 175 00:04:31,533 --> 00:04:32,833 WHERE'S CALVIN? IS HE HERE? 176 00:04:32,833 --> 00:04:34,067 YEAH, HE'S IN THE KITCHEN. 177 00:04:34,067 --> 00:04:35,333 HE'S THROWING OUT YOUR FOOD AND 178 00:04:35,333 --> 00:04:36,567 GETTING HIS MAMA'S FOOD 'CAUSE 179 00:04:36,567 --> 00:04:41,067 HE SAID IT MAKE HIM SICK. 180 00:04:41,067 --> 00:04:42,833 HEY, MIRANDA. 181 00:04:42,833 --> 00:04:44,667 CALVIN, I NEED TO TALK TO 182 00:04:44,667 --> 00:04:45,500 YOU. 183 00:04:45,500 --> 00:04:46,800 [ TV TURNS ON ] 184 00:04:46,800 --> 00:04:49,633 WHAT IS IT NOW? 185 00:04:49,633 --> 00:04:51,833 THIS IS MY HOUSE. 186 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:54,100 WHAT YOU LOOKING AT ME FOR? 187 00:04:54,100 --> 00:04:55,967 WHAT IS IT NOW? 188 00:04:55,967 --> 00:04:57,333 YOU NEVER PICKED UP YOUR 189 00:04:57,333 --> 00:05:00,700 TOWEL THIS MORNING. 190 00:05:00,700 --> 00:05:04,167 SO I FIGURED I'D BRING IT HERE 191 00:05:04,167 --> 00:05:06,733 AND LET YOUR MOTHER PICK IT UP. 192 00:05:06,733 --> 00:05:07,900 YOU BETTER PICK UP THAT 193 00:05:07,900 --> 00:05:09,100 TOWEL BEFORE MY MAMA GET HOME. 194 00:05:09,100 --> 00:05:09,900 YOU CRAZY? 195 00:05:09,900 --> 00:05:11,100 HA, I MUST HAVE BEEN CRAZY 196 00:05:11,100 --> 00:05:16,467 THE DAY I MARRIED YOU. 197 00:05:16,467 --> 00:05:18,067 DOES ANYBODY USE A DOORBELL 198 00:05:18,067 --> 00:05:19,067 AROUND HERE? 199 00:05:19,067 --> 00:05:20,267 IS THIS A BAD TIME? 200 00:05:20,267 --> 00:05:22,067 NO, MAN. COME IN. 201 00:05:22,067 --> 00:05:23,533 WHAT'S UP, MR. PAYNE? 202 00:05:23,533 --> 00:05:24,967 HOW YOU DOING, BABY? 203 00:05:24,967 --> 00:05:26,967 GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF ME. 204 00:05:26,967 --> 00:05:27,933 WHAT'S UP, MAN? 205 00:05:27,933 --> 00:05:29,133 I JUST SAW YOU COME IN. 206 00:05:29,133 --> 00:05:30,533 HEY, WHAT YOU DOING TONIGHT? 207 00:05:30,533 --> 00:05:31,200 NOTHING. 208 00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:32,267 WHAT YOU GOT IN MIND? 209 00:05:32,267 --> 00:05:33,267 OH, I GOT A BOY OF MINE FROM 210 00:05:33,267 --> 00:05:34,067 HIGH SCHOOL IN TOWN. 211 00:05:34,067 --> 00:05:35,067 WE'RE GONNA GO OUT AND HIT THE 212 00:05:35,067 --> 00:05:35,533 TOWN UP, BABE. 213 00:05:35,533 --> 00:05:36,367 OH, THAT'S PERFECT. 214 00:05:36,367 --> 00:05:37,367 I CAN GET OUT OF THE HOUSE. 215 00:05:37,367 --> 00:05:38,300 YOU WANT TO COME OUT? 216 00:05:38,300 --> 00:05:38,700 YEAH. 217 00:05:38,700 --> 00:05:40,100 OH, EXCUSE ME. 218 00:05:40,100 --> 00:05:41,333 WE'RE SUPPOSED TO HAVE DINNER 219 00:05:41,333 --> 00:05:42,400 TONIGHT. 220 00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:44,533 WHAT TIME SHOULD I MEET YOU? 221 00:05:44,533 --> 00:05:45,867 OKAY. 222 00:05:45,867 --> 00:05:46,867 [ LAUGHS ] 223 00:05:46,867 --> 00:05:48,200 SO, NOW YOU DON'T LIKE MY 224 00:05:48,200 --> 00:05:48,667 COOKING? 225 00:05:48,667 --> 00:05:50,333 [ GAGS ] 226 00:05:50,333 --> 00:05:51,800 LOOK, BABE, I THINK IT WOULD 227 00:05:51,800 --> 00:05:52,300 BE GOOD. 228 00:05:52,300 --> 00:05:53,467 MAYBE WE NEED SOME SPACE. 229 00:05:53,467 --> 00:05:54,767 REALLY? 230 00:05:54,767 --> 00:05:56,167 SO, AFTER I'VE GONE TO THE 231 00:05:56,167 --> 00:05:57,567 GROCERY STORE AND BOUGHT ALL 232 00:05:57,567 --> 00:05:59,067 THIS FOOD, PLANNED THIS WHOLE 233 00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:00,500 MEAL FOR US, THIS IS EXACTLY 234 00:06:00,500 --> 00:06:01,700 WHAT I'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT. 235 00:06:01,700 --> 00:06:03,433 OKAY, OKAY, OKAY, OKAY! 236 00:06:03,433 --> 00:06:04,200 I'VE GOT AN IDEA. 237 00:06:04,200 --> 00:06:05,467 HOW ABOUT YOU TWO COME JUST OVER 238 00:06:05,467 --> 00:06:06,467 AND YOU GUYS CAN HAVE A 239 00:06:06,467 --> 00:06:07,100 DELICIOUS -- 240 00:06:07,100 --> 00:06:09,067 [ GAGGING ] 241 00:06:09,067 --> 00:06:10,067 WHATEVER. 242 00:06:10,067 --> 00:06:10,967 YOU -- YOU GUYS CAN HAVE A 243 00:06:10,967 --> 00:06:11,967 DELICIOUS HOME-COOKED MEAL, AND 244 00:06:11,967 --> 00:06:12,933 THEN WE CAN GO OUT AFTERWARDS. 245 00:06:12,933 --> 00:06:14,167 I DIDN'T BUY ENOUGH FOOD FOR 246 00:06:14,167 --> 00:06:14,600 HIM. 247 00:06:14,600 --> 00:06:15,533 OKAY. 248 00:06:15,533 --> 00:06:16,900 THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A 249 00:06:16,900 --> 00:06:18,267 ROMANTIC DINNER WITH THE TWO OF 250 00:06:18,267 --> 00:06:19,167 US. 251 00:06:19,167 --> 00:06:20,200 YOU KNOW WHAT? 252 00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:21,600 I-I CAN'T WIN FOR LOSING WITH 253 00:06:21,600 --> 00:06:22,667 YOU. 254 00:06:22,667 --> 00:06:23,767 YOU KNOW WHAT, GUYS? 255 00:06:23,767 --> 00:06:24,767 IT'S ALL GOOD. 256 00:06:24,767 --> 00:06:25,900 DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, MAN. 257 00:06:25,900 --> 00:06:27,067 NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. 258 00:06:27,067 --> 00:06:28,067 NO, NO, NO, NO. NO, NO. 259 00:06:28,067 --> 00:06:29,067 WE'RE GONNA DO THIS. 260 00:06:29,067 --> 00:06:30,067 AT 7:00 TONIGHT. 261 00:06:30,067 --> 00:06:31,167 ARE YOU SURE? 262 00:06:31,167 --> 00:06:32,700 YES, I'M POSITIVE. 263 00:06:32,700 --> 00:06:33,867 OKAY, WELL, I'M GLAD WE'RE 264 00:06:33,867 --> 00:06:34,400 DOING THIS. 265 00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:35,533 SEE, THIS GUY'S GOT THE HOTS 266 00:06:35,533 --> 00:06:36,200 FOR MY SISTER -- 267 00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:39,500 OH, REALLY? HMM? 268 00:06:39,500 --> 00:06:41,167 OH, CONTINUE. I'M SORRY. 269 00:06:41,167 --> 00:06:42,333 UH, NOTHING. 270 00:06:42,333 --> 00:06:43,500 WELL, MERCEDES LIKES THIS GUY, 271 00:06:43,500 --> 00:06:44,733 SO I WANT YOU GUYS TO CHECK HIM 272 00:06:44,733 --> 00:06:45,067 OUT. 273 00:06:45,067 --> 00:06:46,200 I WANT TO MAKE SURE HE'S WORTHY 274 00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:46,933 OF HER, YOU KNOW? 275 00:06:46,933 --> 00:06:48,067 [ CHUCKLES ] 276 00:06:48,067 --> 00:06:50,300 SURE. NOT A PROBLEM. 277 00:06:50,300 --> 00:06:51,467 SO, DOES 7:00 SOUND GOOD? 278 00:06:51,467 --> 00:06:52,567 YOU KNOW WHAT, DIEGO? 279 00:06:52,567 --> 00:06:53,667 LET ME APOLOGIZE, OKAY? 280 00:06:53,667 --> 00:06:55,067 YOU GUYS COME OVER AT 7:00. 281 00:06:55,067 --> 00:06:56,367 WE'RE GONNA HAVE AN ABSOLUTELY 282 00:06:56,367 --> 00:06:57,133 WONDERFUL MEAL. 283 00:06:57,133 --> 00:06:58,467 BRING YOUR APPETITES AND BRING 284 00:06:58,467 --> 00:06:58,967 MERCEDES. 285 00:06:58,967 --> 00:06:59,900 SHE'S COMING, RIGHT? 286 00:06:59,900 --> 00:07:00,367 NO. 287 00:07:00,367 --> 00:07:00,800 OH. 288 00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:02,267 UNH-UNH, I WANT TO CHECK OUT 289 00:07:02,267 --> 00:07:04,467 THIS GUY FIRST. 290 00:07:04,467 --> 00:07:05,933 HMM. 291 00:07:05,933 --> 00:07:09,733 OKAY, I'M...HAVE A NICE DAY. 292 00:07:17,767 --> 00:07:20,600 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 293 00:07:20,600 --> 00:07:21,933 WHEW. 294 00:07:21,933 --> 00:07:24,433 OKAY. ALL RIGHT. 295 00:07:24,433 --> 00:07:27,267 HEY, WHAT IS GOING ON? 296 00:07:27,267 --> 00:07:29,100 OKAY. COME ON, COME ON, COME ON. 297 00:07:29,100 --> 00:07:30,567 DON'T DO THIS TO ME TODAY. 298 00:07:30,567 --> 00:07:31,567 I CAN'T DO THIS. 299 00:07:31,567 --> 00:07:32,733 UH, EXCUSE ME. 300 00:07:32,733 --> 00:07:34,067 YOU NEED SOME HELP? 301 00:07:34,067 --> 00:07:35,367 UH, NO, SIR. THANK YOU. 302 00:07:35,367 --> 00:07:36,800 IT'S JUST THE LOCK IS JAMMED 303 00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:37,300 ALWAYS. 304 00:07:37,300 --> 00:07:37,867 OKAY. 305 00:07:37,867 --> 00:07:38,667 THANK YOU. 306 00:07:38,667 --> 00:07:39,500 [ CHUCKLES ] 307 00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:40,667 COME ON! OW! 308 00:07:40,667 --> 00:07:42,067 WHOA! 309 00:07:42,067 --> 00:07:43,333 THAT'LL TEACH IT. 310 00:07:43,333 --> 00:07:45,633 YOU MIND IF I TAKE A LOOK? 311 00:07:45,633 --> 00:07:47,600 UH, SURE. 'CAUSE I GIVE UP. 312 00:07:47,600 --> 00:07:50,600 HMM. 313 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:53,900 WHOA. HUH. 314 00:07:53,900 --> 00:07:56,067 WHY IS THIS AIR SO HIGH OUT 315 00:07:56,067 --> 00:07:56,500 HERE? 316 00:07:56,500 --> 00:07:57,833 IT IS A LITTLE CHILLY. 317 00:07:57,833 --> 00:08:00,067 CHILLY? IT'S FREEZING, SIR. 318 00:08:00,067 --> 00:08:02,200 APPARENTLY MALL MANAGEMENT DOES 319 00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:03,833 NOT BELIEVE IN HEAT! 320 00:08:03,833 --> 00:08:04,800 IT MUST MAKE IT KIND OF 321 00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:05,900 UNCOMFORTABLE TO WORK IN HERE, 322 00:08:05,900 --> 00:08:06,200 HUH? 323 00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:08,133 WELL, IT'S BAD ENOUGH THAT WE 324 00:08:08,133 --> 00:08:10,700 HAVE TO ALMOST WALK HALF A MILE 325 00:08:10,700 --> 00:08:12,700 FROM THE EMPLOYEES' PARKING LOT. 326 00:08:12,700 --> 00:08:13,667 HALF A MILE? 327 00:08:13,667 --> 00:08:14,967 HALF A MILE, THEN GET HERE 328 00:08:14,967 --> 00:08:16,600 AND FREEZE WHILE WE'RE AT WORK. 329 00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:19,367 THAT IS A LONG WAY TO WALK! 330 00:08:19,367 --> 00:08:20,067 [ LAUGHS ] 331 00:08:20,067 --> 00:08:21,067 YES. 332 00:08:21,067 --> 00:08:23,100 UH, SIR, LOCK NUMBER TWO. 333 00:08:23,100 --> 00:08:24,067 OH. 334 00:08:24,067 --> 00:08:25,300 [ CHUCKLES ] 335 00:08:25,300 --> 00:08:27,700 SO, WHOSE BIG BRILLIANT IDEA 336 00:08:27,700 --> 00:08:29,533 WAS IT ANYWAY TO PUT THE 337 00:08:29,533 --> 00:08:31,067 EMPLOYEES' PARKING LOT ALL THE 338 00:08:31,067 --> 00:08:32,667 WAY ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE 339 00:08:32,667 --> 00:08:33,333 MALL? 340 00:08:33,333 --> 00:08:34,933 PROBABLY THE STUPID MALL 341 00:08:34,933 --> 00:08:35,767 MANAGER. 342 00:08:35,767 --> 00:08:37,333 THANK YOU. 343 00:08:37,333 --> 00:08:39,067 SO, WHAT DO YOU DO HERE? 344 00:08:39,067 --> 00:08:40,300 I'M THE STUPID MALL MANAGER. 345 00:08:40,300 --> 00:08:41,633 MALL MANAGER! I KNEW IT! 346 00:08:41,633 --> 00:08:42,800 [ LAUGHS ] 347 00:08:42,800 --> 00:08:44,467 WHEN IT CAME OUT OF MY MOUTH. 348 00:08:44,467 --> 00:08:46,467 PAUL FOSTER. HOW DO YOU DO? 349 00:08:46,467 --> 00:08:48,467 I'M EMBARRASSED, AND I'M 350 00:08:48,467 --> 00:08:49,467 ELLA PAYNE. 351 00:08:49,467 --> 00:08:50,533 NICE TO MEET YOU, ELLA. 352 00:08:50,533 --> 00:08:51,633 PLEASURE MEETING YOU, SIR. 353 00:08:51,633 --> 00:08:52,800 AND BY THE WAY, YOU'RE RIGHT 354 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:53,900 ABOUT HOW COLD IS UP IN HERE. 355 00:08:53,900 --> 00:08:54,733 DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. 356 00:08:54,733 --> 00:08:55,867 I'M GONNA TAKE A LOOK INTO IT. 357 00:08:55,867 --> 00:08:57,100 I WOULD APPRECIATE THAT. 358 00:08:57,100 --> 00:08:57,767 THANK YOU. 359 00:08:57,767 --> 00:08:58,900 IT WAS NICE TALKING WITH YOU. 360 00:08:58,900 --> 00:08:59,567 OH, YOU, TOO. 361 00:08:59,567 --> 00:09:01,233 OH, AND BY THE WAY, IT WASN'T 362 00:09:01,233 --> 00:09:02,667 MY IDEA TO PUT THE PARKING LOT 363 00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:04,067 ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE MALL. 364 00:09:04,067 --> 00:09:05,833 I'M JUST SAYING. 365 00:09:05,833 --> 00:09:07,067 HAVE A GREAT DAY. 366 00:09:07,067 --> 00:09:07,633 YOU, TOO. 367 00:09:07,633 --> 00:09:09,500 THANK YOU. 368 00:09:12,600 --> 00:09:13,767 YOU KNOW WHAT? 369 00:09:13,767 --> 00:09:15,867 HOW ABOUT TONIGHT I JUST STOP 370 00:09:15,867 --> 00:09:17,200 TALKING AND I AGREE WITH 371 00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:18,333 EVERYTHING YOU SAY? 372 00:09:18,333 --> 00:09:18,933 OH. 373 00:09:18,933 --> 00:09:20,433 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 374 00:09:20,433 --> 00:09:21,833 YOU GONNA GET THE DOOR? 375 00:09:21,833 --> 00:09:23,067 I THOUGHT YOU WEREN'T TALKING 376 00:09:23,067 --> 00:09:26,067 TO ME. 377 00:09:26,067 --> 00:09:30,067 THANK YOU! 378 00:09:30,067 --> 00:09:30,667 HEY, HEY. 379 00:09:30,667 --> 00:09:31,567 WHAT'S UP, BABY? 380 00:09:31,567 --> 00:09:32,467 WHAT'S GOING ON? 381 00:09:32,467 --> 00:09:33,267 HOW YOU DOING? 382 00:09:33,267 --> 00:09:34,267 HEY, HOW YOU DOING? 383 00:09:34,267 --> 00:09:35,233 CALVIN. 384 00:09:35,233 --> 00:09:35,833 HI. 385 00:09:35,833 --> 00:09:37,333 MIRANDA, THIS IS JAVIER. 386 00:09:37,333 --> 00:09:38,533 JAVIER. 387 00:09:38,533 --> 00:09:39,633 HELLO, MIRANDA. 388 00:09:39,633 --> 00:09:40,300 HELLO. 389 00:09:40,300 --> 00:09:41,800 WOW, IT SMELLS REALLY GOOD 390 00:09:41,800 --> 00:09:42,700 IN HERE. 391 00:09:42,700 --> 00:09:44,200 CAN I HELP YOU WITH SOMETHING? 392 00:09:44,200 --> 00:09:45,400 THANK YOU SO MUCH, BUT NO. 393 00:09:45,400 --> 00:09:47,133 PLEASE TAKE A SEAT, AND WE'LL 394 00:09:47,133 --> 00:09:48,333 SERVE YOU SOME HORS D'OEUVRES. 395 00:09:48,333 --> 00:09:49,300 YOU HEAR THAT, CALVIN? 396 00:09:49,300 --> 00:09:50,267 TAKE NOTES. GOT THAT. 397 00:09:50,267 --> 00:09:51,300 YEAH, YEAH. I GOT IT. 398 00:09:51,300 --> 00:09:51,800 I GOT IT. 399 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:53,300 THAT WAS A NICE LITTLE TOUCH ON, 400 00:09:53,300 --> 00:09:54,867 "CAN I HELP YOU WITH ANYTHING?" 401 00:09:54,867 --> 00:09:59,067 HEY, I GOT IT. CHECK. 402 00:09:59,067 --> 00:10:00,967 E-EXCUSE ME. 403 00:10:00,967 --> 00:10:02,467 I like him. 404 00:10:02,467 --> 00:10:04,200 GIVE SOME HORS D'OEUVRES. 405 00:10:04,200 --> 00:10:05,200 HORS D'OEUVRES. 406 00:10:05,200 --> 00:10:07,200 OH, YES, YES, YES, SIR. 407 00:10:07,200 --> 00:10:08,767 I AM STARVING. 408 00:10:08,767 --> 00:10:10,433 MIRANDA, YOU DID NOT HAVE TO DO 409 00:10:10,433 --> 00:10:10,867 THIS. 410 00:10:10,867 --> 00:10:11,867 OH! 411 00:10:11,867 --> 00:10:14,700 [ CHUCKLES ] 412 00:10:14,700 --> 00:10:15,767 MMM. 413 00:10:15,767 --> 00:10:16,667 MMM. 414 00:10:16,667 --> 00:10:17,867 MMM-MMM. 415 00:10:17,867 --> 00:10:18,733 MM-HMM. 416 00:10:18,733 --> 00:10:19,500 MM-HMM? 417 00:10:19,500 --> 00:10:20,233 MMM. 418 00:10:20,233 --> 00:10:21,133 MMM. 419 00:10:21,133 --> 00:10:21,700 MM. 420 00:10:21,700 --> 00:10:22,800 OH, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. 421 00:10:22,800 --> 00:10:23,767 SO, YOU LIKE IT? 422 00:10:23,767 --> 00:10:24,800 All: MMM-MMM. 423 00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:27,233 MM, UM, BABY... 424 00:10:27,233 --> 00:10:28,433 WHAT IS THIS? 425 00:10:28,433 --> 00:10:29,500 OH, IT'S A NEW RECIPE. 426 00:10:29,500 --> 00:10:30,800 THEY'RE MINI FAJITAS WITH 427 00:10:30,800 --> 00:10:32,233 ARTICHOKE AND FISH. 428 00:10:32,233 --> 00:10:33,433 GOOD, HUH? 429 00:10:33,433 --> 00:10:35,067 MM-HMM. 430 00:10:35,067 --> 00:10:36,867 I HAVE TO USE THE RESTROOM. 431 00:10:36,867 --> 00:10:37,867 HMM. 432 00:10:37,867 --> 00:10:39,600 [ COUGHS ] 433 00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:41,100 THESE ARE GREAT, MIRANDA. 434 00:10:41,100 --> 00:10:42,200 OH, YOU LIKE THEM? 435 00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:43,600 OH, I'M SO HAPPY THEY CAME OUT 436 00:10:43,600 --> 00:10:45,000 GOOD, BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHEN YOU 437 00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:46,267 TRY A NEW RECIPE YOU REALLY 438 00:10:46,267 --> 00:10:47,700 NEVER KNOW HOW IT'S GONNA TURN 439 00:10:47,700 --> 00:10:48,033 OUT. 440 00:10:48,033 --> 00:10:48,967 Both: [ LAUGH ] 441 00:10:48,967 --> 00:10:50,167 OH, BUT PLEASE EXCUSE ME. 442 00:10:50,167 --> 00:10:51,433 I'M GONNA RUN TO THE BACK AND 443 00:10:51,433 --> 00:10:52,233 WASH UP A LITTLE. 444 00:10:52,233 --> 00:10:53,300 I'VE BEEN CHOPPING ONIONS. 445 00:10:53,300 --> 00:10:55,133 I JUST NEED TO FRESHEN UP. 446 00:10:55,133 --> 00:10:56,967 OH, I CAN'T WAIT. 447 00:10:56,967 --> 00:11:00,200 [ LAUGHING ] 448 00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:01,067 [ GAGS ] 449 00:11:01,067 --> 00:11:02,100 AH, AH, I THOUGHT YOU SAID 450 00:11:02,100 --> 00:11:02,700 YOU LIKED IT. 451 00:11:02,700 --> 00:11:03,933 YEAH, IT'S CALLED DIPLOMACY, 452 00:11:03,933 --> 00:11:04,233 BRO. 453 00:11:04,233 --> 00:11:05,300 THESE THINGS TASTE LIKE BOOTY. 454 00:11:05,300 --> 00:11:07,067 [ LAUGHS ] 455 00:11:07,067 --> 00:11:08,900 WOW! 456 00:11:08,900 --> 00:11:10,133 YOUR WIFE'S COOKING IS AWFUL, 457 00:11:10,133 --> 00:11:12,067 CALVIN. 458 00:11:12,067 --> 00:11:14,700 BUT...SHE IS VERY BEAUTIFUL. 459 00:11:14,700 --> 00:11:15,733 HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY! 460 00:11:15,733 --> 00:11:16,633 EYES OVER HERE. 461 00:11:16,633 --> 00:11:18,100 THE TV's RIGHT THERE. THANK YOU. 462 00:11:18,100 --> 00:11:19,933 HEY, LISTEN, BEFORE DIEGO 463 00:11:19,933 --> 00:11:22,067 GETS BACK, I WANTED TO ASK YOU 464 00:11:22,067 --> 00:11:22,667 SOMETHING. 465 00:11:22,667 --> 00:11:24,133 WHAT'S UP? 466 00:11:24,133 --> 00:11:26,067 WELL, YOU KNOW, MERCEDES 467 00:11:26,067 --> 00:11:27,200 TALKS A LOT ABOUT YOU. 468 00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:28,267 WHO, ME? 469 00:11:28,267 --> 00:11:29,467 MM, YEAH, YOU GUYS WORK 470 00:11:29,467 --> 00:11:30,533 TOGETHER, RIGHT? 471 00:11:30,533 --> 00:11:31,900 SHE'S A BIG FAN OF YOURS. 472 00:11:31,900 --> 00:11:33,900 WELL, I-I'M A BIG FAN, TOO. 473 00:11:33,900 --> 00:11:35,367 OF HER, NOT ME. 474 00:11:35,367 --> 00:11:37,500 WELL, OF HER WORK, YOU KNOW, 475 00:11:37,500 --> 00:11:38,633 ALL THAT SHE STANDS FOR. 476 00:11:38,633 --> 00:11:40,133 SHE DOES HER JOB WELL, YEAH. 477 00:11:40,133 --> 00:11:40,933 [ CHUCKLES ] 478 00:11:40,933 --> 00:11:42,667 SHE SAID YOU'RE A FUNNY GUY. 479 00:11:42,667 --> 00:11:43,900 YEAH, I'M KIND OF FUNNY, A 480 00:11:43,900 --> 00:11:44,500 LITTLE BIT. 481 00:11:44,500 --> 00:11:47,067 YEAH. YOU KNOW WHAT? 482 00:11:47,067 --> 00:11:49,067 YOU COULD BE MY INSIDE MAN. 483 00:11:49,067 --> 00:11:49,933 EXCUSE ME? 484 00:11:49,933 --> 00:11:52,133 YEAH, WITH MERCEDES, I MEAN. 485 00:11:52,133 --> 00:11:53,867 SEE, DIEGO'S HER BROTHER, SO I 486 00:11:53,867 --> 00:11:55,467 CAN'T ASK HIM, YOU KNOW. 487 00:11:55,467 --> 00:11:56,733 I JUST -- I WANT TO -- IS SHE 488 00:11:56,733 --> 00:11:57,633 SEEING ANYONE? 489 00:11:57,633 --> 00:11:58,900 DOES SHE HAVE ANY HOBB-- LOOK, 490 00:11:58,900 --> 00:12:00,167 I'M NOT REALLY INTERESTED IN 491 00:12:00,167 --> 00:12:00,867 ALL THAT CRAP. 492 00:12:00,867 --> 00:12:02,067 I JUST -- I WANT TO -- HERE'S 493 00:12:02,067 --> 00:12:02,567 THE THING. 494 00:12:02,567 --> 00:12:04,100 I'VE BEEN DRIVING ECONOMY CARS 495 00:12:04,100 --> 00:12:05,500 FOR A WHILE, AND I JUST THINK 496 00:12:05,500 --> 00:12:07,067 IT'S TIME FOR ME TO TEST-DRIVE 497 00:12:07,067 --> 00:12:08,500 THAT MERCEDES, YOU KNOW WHAT I 498 00:12:08,500 --> 00:12:09,100 MEAN? 499 00:12:09,100 --> 00:12:10,067 HA! 500 00:12:10,067 --> 00:12:10,800 HA! 501 00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:11,400 YEAH. 502 00:12:11,400 --> 00:12:12,167 [ LAUGHS ] YEAH. 503 00:12:12,167 --> 00:12:13,233 YOU KNOW, I'M GLAD DIEGO 504 00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:13,800 HOOKED US UP. 505 00:12:13,800 --> 00:12:14,967 WE'RE GONNA -- WE'RE GONNA WORK 506 00:12:14,967 --> 00:12:15,800 OUT GREAT. 507 00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:16,900 YOU'RE GONNA -- YEAH. 508 00:12:16,900 --> 00:12:18,433 YEAH, THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT. 509 00:12:18,433 --> 00:12:19,300 YEAH. [ LAUGHS ] 510 00:12:19,300 --> 00:12:20,067 YOU KNOW WHAT? 511 00:12:20,067 --> 00:12:21,500 LET ME GET YOU ANOTHER HORS 512 00:12:21,500 --> 00:12:22,067 D'OEUVRE. 513 00:12:22,067 --> 00:12:23,567 UH, I'M GOOD WITH THAT. 514 00:12:23,567 --> 00:12:24,733 DIPLOMACY, BRO. 515 00:12:24,733 --> 00:12:26,600 HERE, TAKE TWO. 516 00:12:32,400 --> 00:12:35,067 OKAY, I HAVE TO TELL YOU. 517 00:12:35,067 --> 00:12:36,733 THIS IS GOING TO BE 50% OFF 518 00:12:36,733 --> 00:12:38,900 TOMORROW, SO WHY DON'T I JUST 519 00:12:38,900 --> 00:12:40,800 PUT THIS OVER HERE TO THE SIDE. 520 00:12:40,800 --> 00:12:42,067 * AND YOU COME ON BACK AND GET 521 00:12:42,067 --> 00:12:43,567 IT TOMORROW? * 522 00:12:43,567 --> 00:12:45,067 [ CHUCKLES ] 523 00:12:45,067 --> 00:12:46,567 [ WHISTLES ] 524 00:12:46,567 --> 00:12:48,733 YOU DRIVE A PRETTY HARD BARGAIN. 525 00:12:48,733 --> 00:12:50,200 WELL, I GUESS I CAN'T HELP 526 00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:51,067 MYSELF. 527 00:12:51,067 --> 00:12:52,533 I JUST WISH SOMEONE WOULD HAVE 528 00:12:52,533 --> 00:12:53,900 TOLD ME THAT STUFF WHEN I WAS 529 00:12:53,900 --> 00:12:54,433 SHOPPING. 530 00:12:54,433 --> 00:12:55,867 WELL, THAT'S AWFULLY NICE OF 531 00:12:55,867 --> 00:12:56,233 YOU. 532 00:12:56,233 --> 00:12:57,433 SO, ARE YOU DONE FOR THE 533 00:12:57,433 --> 00:12:57,933 EVENING? 534 00:12:57,933 --> 00:12:59,467 YEAH, AND I THOUGHT I MIGHT 535 00:12:59,467 --> 00:13:01,533 DO SOME SHOPPING FOR A SPECIAL 536 00:13:01,533 --> 00:13:02,067 LADY. 537 00:13:02,067 --> 00:13:02,933 OH. 538 00:13:02,933 --> 00:13:04,767 WELL, WOULD YOU REQUIRE ANY 539 00:13:04,767 --> 00:13:06,267 ASSISTANCE, SIR? 540 00:13:06,267 --> 00:13:07,567 I'M AFRAID SO. 541 00:13:07,567 --> 00:13:08,900 WHEN IT COMES TO SHOPPING, I'M 542 00:13:08,900 --> 00:13:09,833 PRETTY HELPLESS. 543 00:13:09,833 --> 00:13:11,367 I MEAN, MY WIFE USED TO DO ALL 544 00:13:11,367 --> 00:13:12,533 THE SHOPPING FOR ME. 545 00:13:12,533 --> 00:13:13,833 BUT EVER SINCE SHE'S PASSED, 546 00:13:13,833 --> 00:13:15,500 I'VE HAD TO RELY ON NICE PEOPLE 547 00:13:15,500 --> 00:13:16,533 SUCH AS YOURSELF. 548 00:13:16,533 --> 00:13:18,067 WOW. I'M SORRY TO HEAR THAT. 549 00:13:18,067 --> 00:13:20,933 YEAH, YOU KNOW, YOU, UH, KIND 550 00:13:20,933 --> 00:13:22,900 OF REMIND ME OF HER. 551 00:13:22,900 --> 00:13:25,333 I REMIND YOU OF A DEAD WOMAN? 552 00:13:25,333 --> 00:13:26,267 [ CHUCKLES ] 553 00:13:26,267 --> 00:13:28,267 NO, SHE WAS VERY KIND, JUST LIKE 554 00:13:28,267 --> 00:13:28,767 YOU. 555 00:13:28,767 --> 00:13:31,067 I'M JOKING. SORRY. 556 00:13:31,067 --> 00:13:32,100 UH, THANK YOU. 557 00:13:32,100 --> 00:13:34,200 WELL, PAUL, WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING 558 00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:34,667 FOR? 559 00:13:34,667 --> 00:13:36,267 I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA. 560 00:13:36,267 --> 00:13:37,900 WHAT DO WOMEN LIKE? 561 00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:39,867 WELL, UH, YOU ARE PRETTY 562 00:13:39,867 --> 00:13:41,267 HELPLESS, HUH? 563 00:13:41,267 --> 00:13:43,967 SO WHY DON'T WE -- JEWELRY IS 564 00:13:43,967 --> 00:13:45,267 ALWAYS NICE. 565 00:13:45,267 --> 00:13:47,433 ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS. 566 00:13:47,433 --> 00:13:48,600 SO WHAT DO YOU SEE? 567 00:13:48,600 --> 00:13:49,600 WHAT DO YOU LIKE? 568 00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:50,533 UH, OOH. 569 00:13:50,533 --> 00:13:51,500 PUT THAT BACK. 570 00:13:51,500 --> 00:13:53,500 DON'T NOBODY WANT THAT. 571 00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:54,833 [ LAUGHS ] 572 00:13:54,833 --> 00:13:58,167 THIS IS MY FAVORITE. 573 00:13:58,167 --> 00:13:58,833 OH. 574 00:13:58,833 --> 00:14:00,167 IT CAME IN YESTERDAY. 575 00:14:00,167 --> 00:14:01,833 THIS IS VERY NICE. 576 00:14:01,833 --> 00:14:03,533 YOU KNOW, I THINK I'LL TAKE IT. 577 00:14:03,533 --> 00:14:05,100 COULD YOU WRAP IT UP FOR ME, 578 00:14:05,100 --> 00:14:05,667 PLEASE? 579 00:14:05,667 --> 00:14:06,767 CERTAINLY, SIR. 580 00:14:06,767 --> 00:14:07,667 CASH OR CHARGE? 581 00:14:07,667 --> 00:14:09,200 UH, CASH. 582 00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:11,500 I'M WHAT YOU CALL OLD-FASHIONED. 583 00:14:11,500 --> 00:14:13,267 YEAH, AND I LIKE CASH. 584 00:14:13,267 --> 00:14:16,400 [ CHUCKLES ] 585 00:14:16,400 --> 00:14:17,700 PAUL, PAUL, PAUL, PAUL! 586 00:14:17,700 --> 00:14:18,833 PAUL, PAUL, PAUL, PAUL! 587 00:14:18,833 --> 00:14:20,367 YOU FORGOT YOUR GIFT, SIR. 588 00:14:20,367 --> 00:14:22,067 NO, I DIDN'T. 589 00:14:22,067 --> 00:14:24,067 THAT'S FOR YOU. 590 00:14:24,067 --> 00:14:25,267 WAIT. NO. 591 00:14:25,267 --> 00:14:28,667 NO. FOR YOU. 592 00:14:28,667 --> 00:14:29,800 [ CLICKS TONGUE ] 593 00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:36,133 [ GASPING ] 594 00:14:36,133 --> 00:14:36,933 OKAY. 595 00:14:36,933 --> 00:14:39,867 WHAT THE HELL WRONG WITH HIM? 596 00:14:39,867 --> 00:14:41,567 JUST WALKING OUT OF HERE. 597 00:14:41,567 --> 00:14:44,733 PEOPLE CRAZY. 598 00:14:45,067 --> 00:14:48,133 ELLA PAYNE, ARE YOU BLUSHING? 599 00:14:48,133 --> 00:14:49,800 UH...WHY? 600 00:14:49,800 --> 00:14:50,867 I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER THE 601 00:14:50,867 --> 00:14:52,100 LAST TIME I MADE YOU BLUSH, 602 00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:53,633 GIRL. 603 00:14:53,633 --> 00:14:54,833 YOU STILL THINKING ABOUT LAST 604 00:14:54,833 --> 00:14:55,267 NIGHT? 605 00:14:55,267 --> 00:14:57,200 CURTIS. 606 00:14:57,200 --> 00:14:58,267 I AM. 607 00:14:58,267 --> 00:15:00,200 LET'S GO. 608 00:15:02,933 --> 00:15:04,367 SO, THEN WE COME IN, AND WE 609 00:15:04,367 --> 00:15:05,733 HIT THE GUY, AND THE GUY JUST 610 00:15:05,733 --> 00:15:06,833 PASSES OUT, AND IT WAS 611 00:15:06,833 --> 00:15:07,433 HILARIOUS. 612 00:15:07,433 --> 00:15:10,767 [ LAUGHS ] 613 00:15:10,767 --> 00:15:12,100 WELL, YOU KNOW, YOU GUYS, PLEASE 614 00:15:12,100 --> 00:15:12,467 RELAX. 615 00:15:12,467 --> 00:15:13,600 I'M GONNA PUT ON A POT OF 616 00:15:13,600 --> 00:15:14,067 COFFEE. 617 00:15:14,067 --> 00:15:15,267 MNH-MNH-MNH. 618 00:15:15,267 --> 00:15:16,900 LET ME HELP YOU, MIRANDA. 619 00:15:16,900 --> 00:15:19,433 OH, THANK YOU SO MUCH, 620 00:15:19,433 --> 00:15:19,933 JAVIER. 621 00:15:19,933 --> 00:15:21,067 YOU ARE SO SWEET. 622 00:15:21,067 --> 00:15:22,333 OH, PLEASE, DARLING, CALL ME 623 00:15:22,333 --> 00:15:22,800 "JAVY." 624 00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:24,100 OH, JAVY. 625 00:15:24,100 --> 00:15:25,200 BABY, YOU TAKING NOTES? 626 00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:26,400 OH, YEAH, I GOT A WHOLE 627 00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:27,467 NOTEBOOK FULL OF BULL... 628 00:15:27,467 --> 00:15:28,933 [ SNEEZES ] 629 00:15:28,933 --> 00:15:31,067 HEY, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, 630 00:15:31,067 --> 00:15:31,533 BRO. 631 00:15:31,533 --> 00:15:32,733 I'M SURE SHE'S GOT SOME HOT 632 00:15:32,733 --> 00:15:33,567 DESSERT WAITING FOR YOU. 633 00:15:33,567 --> 00:15:34,133 WHOA, WHOA. 634 00:15:34,133 --> 00:15:35,067 THAT'S NOT YOUR BUSINESS. 635 00:15:35,067 --> 00:15:35,800 DIEGO, GET YOUR BOY. 636 00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:36,867 I'M GETTING SICK OF YOU, DUDE. 637 00:15:36,867 --> 00:15:39,333 [ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ] 638 00:15:39,333 --> 00:15:40,600 LOOK, AND I'M ALSO GETTING SICK 639 00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:41,833 OF THE WAY YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT 640 00:15:41,833 --> 00:15:42,267 MERCEDES. 641 00:15:42,267 --> 00:15:42,867 EXCUSE ME? 642 00:15:42,867 --> 00:15:44,067 WHAT ARE YOU SAYING ABOUT MY 643 00:15:44,067 --> 00:15:44,433 SISTER? 644 00:15:44,433 --> 00:15:45,633 I'M NOT SAYING ANYTHING. 645 00:15:45,633 --> 00:15:46,867 DIEGO, COME ON, MAN, YOU'VE 646 00:15:46,867 --> 00:15:47,900 KNOWN ME FOR SO LONG. 647 00:15:47,900 --> 00:15:48,833 WHAT WOULD I SAY? 648 00:15:48,833 --> 00:15:49,867 HE'S JUST BUGGING OUT. 649 00:15:49,867 --> 00:15:51,167 OKAY, FIRST OF ALL, I'M NOT 650 00:15:51,167 --> 00:15:51,800 BUGGING OUT. 651 00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:53,067 SECOND OF ALL, I'M TIRED OF HOW 652 00:15:53,067 --> 00:15:54,333 YOU'RE PLAYING TWO-FACE WITH MY 653 00:15:54,333 --> 00:15:55,600 WIFE, BEING POLITE AND THEN -- 654 00:15:55,600 --> 00:15:56,533 WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. 655 00:15:56,533 --> 00:15:57,233 HOLD ON, MAN. 656 00:15:57,233 --> 00:15:58,200 WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON RIGHT 657 00:15:58,200 --> 00:15:58,833 NOW WITH YOU GUYS? 658 00:15:58,833 --> 00:15:59,467 YOU KNOW WHAT? 659 00:15:59,467 --> 00:16:00,533 I'LL TELL YOU WHAT'S GOING ON. 660 00:16:00,533 --> 00:16:02,167 YOUR LITTLE BUDDY RIGHT HERE, 661 00:16:02,167 --> 00:16:03,500 HE'S ONLY INTERESTED IN HITTING 662 00:16:03,500 --> 00:16:04,400 MERCEDES. 663 00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:06,367 WHAT? THAT'S RIDICULOUS. 664 00:16:06,367 --> 00:16:07,500 OH, NO, NO. 665 00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:08,800 GO AHEAD AND TELL HIM, JAVY. 666 00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:09,933 TELL HIM HOW YOU WANT TO 667 00:16:09,933 --> 00:16:11,267 TEST-DRIVE THAT MERCEDES. 668 00:16:11,267 --> 00:16:12,300 DIEGO, HE'S NOT YOUR BOY. 669 00:16:12,300 --> 00:16:13,433 HE'S JUST TRYING TO GET WITH 670 00:16:13,433 --> 00:16:14,967 YOUR SISTER. 671 00:16:14,967 --> 00:16:16,333 OH. 672 00:16:16,333 --> 00:16:18,533 OH, I SEE WHAT'S HAPPENING HERE. 673 00:16:18,533 --> 00:16:20,200 I THINK I HIT A NERVE, DIDN'T I, 674 00:16:20,200 --> 00:16:21,133 CALVIN? 675 00:16:21,133 --> 00:16:22,067 YEAH? 676 00:16:22,067 --> 00:16:23,067 'CAUSE YOU DON'T WANT ME TO GO 677 00:16:23,067 --> 00:16:25,800 FOR MERCEDES, RIGHT? 678 00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:27,600 'CAUSE YOU WANT TO TAP MERCEDES. 679 00:16:27,600 --> 00:16:28,400 OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT? 680 00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:29,300 THAT'S IT, MAN. HOLD ON. 681 00:16:29,300 --> 00:16:30,467 WHAT ARE YOU DOING DISRESPECTING 682 00:16:30,467 --> 00:16:31,200 THESE PEOPLE, JAVY? 683 00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:32,167 I'M TRYING TO ASK HIM OVER 684 00:16:32,167 --> 00:16:32,500 HERE. 685 00:16:32,500 --> 00:16:33,800 YOU COME INTO A HOUSE. 686 00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:34,833 THAT'S HIS WIFE RIGHT THERE. 687 00:16:34,833 --> 00:16:35,733 THAT IS HIS WIFE. 688 00:16:35,733 --> 00:16:36,933 YEAH, IT IS. RESPECT HER. 689 00:16:36,933 --> 00:16:38,733 RESPECT? YES, RESPECT. 690 00:16:38,733 --> 00:16:40,067 YOU KNOW WHAT? COME ON, RESPECT. 691 00:16:40,067 --> 00:16:41,167 LET'S SHARE SOME SECRETS. 692 00:16:41,167 --> 00:16:41,900 YOU KNOW WHAT? 693 00:16:41,900 --> 00:16:43,167 WHY DON'T YOU GET THE HELL OUT 694 00:16:43,167 --> 00:16:43,767 OF MY HOUSE. 695 00:16:43,767 --> 00:16:45,100 DO I HAVE TO GET OUT? 696 00:16:45,100 --> 00:16:47,067 RESPECT MY HOUSE. 697 00:16:47,067 --> 00:16:47,833 TIME-OUT. 698 00:16:47,833 --> 00:16:49,233 I'D LIKE TO HEAR WHAT HE HAS TO 699 00:16:49,233 --> 00:16:49,733 SAY. 700 00:16:49,733 --> 00:16:51,067 YEAH. SHE WANTS TO HEAR. 701 00:16:51,067 --> 00:16:52,300 COME ON, COME DOWN HERE. 702 00:16:52,300 --> 00:16:53,400 GET OUT OF MY HOUSE! 703 00:16:53,400 --> 00:16:54,500 YOU GUYS CARPOOL TOGETHER. 704 00:16:54,500 --> 00:16:56,100 DIEGO, GET YOUR BOY, GET 705 00:16:56,100 --> 00:16:56,733 YOUR BOY. 706 00:16:56,733 --> 00:16:57,767 SHUT UP! SHUT UP! 707 00:16:57,767 --> 00:16:59,067 YOU GUYS MAKE A CUTE COUPLE. 708 00:16:59,067 --> 00:17:01,833 SHUT UP! SHUT UP! 709 00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:11,500 WHAT'S GOING ON, CALVIN? 710 00:17:11,500 --> 00:17:12,800 THERE AIN'T NOTHING GOING ON, 711 00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:15,267 MIRANDA. 712 00:17:15,267 --> 00:17:16,567 ARE YOU SURE? 713 00:17:16,567 --> 00:17:17,900 BABY, YOU GONNA LET HIM COME 714 00:17:17,900 --> 00:17:19,067 IN HERE AND TALK, AND YOU'RE 715 00:17:19,067 --> 00:17:20,200 JUST GONNA BELIEVE ANYTHING HE 716 00:17:20,200 --> 00:17:20,833 SAY? 717 00:17:20,833 --> 00:17:22,833 SHOULD I? 718 00:17:22,833 --> 00:17:24,667 MIRANDA, YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW 719 00:17:24,667 --> 00:17:25,167 HIM. 720 00:17:25,167 --> 00:17:26,100 I'M YOUR HUSBAND. 721 00:17:26,100 --> 00:17:26,733 [ SCOFFS ] 722 00:17:26,733 --> 00:17:27,867 I'M TELLING YOU, THERE'S 723 00:17:27,867 --> 00:17:30,633 NOTHING GOING ON. 724 00:17:30,633 --> 00:17:31,967 LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT A 725 00:17:31,967 --> 00:17:35,267 WOMAN'S INTUITION, CALVIN. 726 00:17:35,267 --> 00:17:37,233 WE KNOW. 727 00:17:37,233 --> 00:17:38,900 WE KNOW WHEN SOMETHING'S NOT 728 00:17:38,900 --> 00:17:41,700 RIGHT, SO IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING 729 00:17:41,700 --> 00:17:43,067 THAT YOU NEED TO TELL ME, YOU 730 00:17:43,067 --> 00:17:44,467 NEED TO TELL ME NOW. 731 00:17:44,467 --> 00:17:45,933 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 732 00:17:45,933 --> 00:17:47,267 LIKE I SAID, I AIN'T GOT 733 00:17:47,267 --> 00:17:48,900 NOTHING TO TELL YOU. 734 00:17:48,900 --> 00:17:50,067 [ CLEARS THROAT ] 735 00:17:50,067 --> 00:17:52,367 GUYS. SERIOUSLY, I'M SORRY. 736 00:17:52,367 --> 00:17:53,833 HE HAD WAY TOO MUCH TO DRINK, 737 00:17:53,833 --> 00:17:54,833 ALL RIGHT? 738 00:17:54,833 --> 00:17:56,100 LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING. 739 00:17:56,100 --> 00:17:59,067 MIRANDA, I SWEAR THERE IS 740 00:17:59,067 --> 00:18:00,300 NOTHING GOING ON BETWEEN CALVIN 741 00:18:00,300 --> 00:18:01,233 AND MY SISTER. 742 00:18:01,233 --> 00:18:01,833 DIEGO -- 743 00:18:01,833 --> 00:18:03,600 DON'T YOU THINK I WOULD KNOW? 744 00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:06,333 DIEGO, SAVE IT, OKAY? 745 00:18:06,333 --> 00:18:08,067 I KNOW THIS IS YOUR BOY. 746 00:18:08,067 --> 00:18:09,500 I KNOW YOU'RE GONNA COVER FOR 747 00:18:09,500 --> 00:18:10,700 HIM. 748 00:18:10,700 --> 00:18:12,200 I'M GONNA GO TO SLEEP. 749 00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:13,100 I'M GONNA GIVE YOU A LITTLE BIT 750 00:18:13,100 --> 00:18:14,500 OF TIME TO GET YOUR LITTLE LIE 751 00:18:14,500 --> 00:18:15,667 TOGETHER, GET YOUR STORIES 752 00:18:15,667 --> 00:18:17,400 RIGHT. 753 00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:20,333 AND ONCE YOU DO, WHY DON'T YOU 754 00:18:20,333 --> 00:18:22,267 COME TELL ME YOUR NEW TRUTH, 755 00:18:22,267 --> 00:18:22,867 OKAY? 756 00:18:22,867 --> 00:18:24,233 LIKE I SAID, I AIN'T GOT 757 00:18:24,233 --> 00:18:25,467 NOTHING TO TELL YOU. 758 00:18:25,467 --> 00:18:28,400 GET YOUR STORY RIGHT, CALVIN. 759 00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:30,200 OR YOU WON'T HAVE A WIFE TO BE 760 00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:32,167 CONCERNED ABOUT. 761 00:18:38,367 --> 00:18:39,467 MAN, I'M SORRY, DUDE. 762 00:18:39,467 --> 00:18:40,600 I SHOULD HAVE NEVER BROUGHT HIM 763 00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:41,100 HERE. 764 00:18:41,100 --> 00:18:42,433 NO, MAN. IT'S MY FAULT. 765 00:18:42,433 --> 00:18:44,100 I SHOULD HAVE NEVER BLEW UP. 766 00:18:44,100 --> 00:18:45,433 BLEW UP? 767 00:18:45,433 --> 00:18:46,700 DUDE, YOU WERE WATCHING MY BACK 768 00:18:46,700 --> 00:18:47,800 THE WHOLE DAMN TIME. 769 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:48,833 I'M THE ONE THAT SHOULD BE 770 00:18:48,833 --> 00:18:51,233 PROTECTING MY OWN SISTER. 771 00:18:51,233 --> 00:18:52,633 I APPRECIATE IT FOR STEPPING UP 772 00:18:52,633 --> 00:18:55,400 TODAY, MAN. 773 00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:56,567 I'M GONNA GET OUT OF HERE. 774 00:18:56,567 --> 00:18:58,433 IT'S A LITTLE LATE. 775 00:18:58,433 --> 00:19:01,267 KEEP YOUR HEAD UP. 776 00:19:01,267 --> 00:19:04,500 YOU KNOW WHAT? 777 00:19:04,500 --> 00:19:05,967 SOMETIMES I WISH MERCEDES WOULD 778 00:19:05,967 --> 00:19:07,800 BE WITH SOMEONE LIKE YOU. 46753

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