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[ CHEERING ON TELEVISION ]
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HALLELUJAH.
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HEY, BABY.
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HOW WAS CHURCH?
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YOU WOULD KNOW IF YOU WOULD
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GO WITH ME SOMETIME.
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[ LAUGHS ]
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OH, BABY, I DON'T WANT TO KNOW
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THAT BAD.
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I NEED YOUR ATTENTION,
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PLEASE.
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COME ON, BABY.
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WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
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NOW, THE PASTOR TOLD US ALL
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TO JUST "GO HOME AND FAST!"
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WAIT A MINUTE, BABY, WAIT
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A MINUTE, ARE YOU SURE HE SAID
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THAT YOU SHOULD "GO HOME AND
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FAST," OR DID HE SAY "GO HOME
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FAST"?
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BECAUSE HE'S PROBABLY JUST
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TRYING TO GET Y'ALL OUT THE
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CHURCH.
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YOU KNOW, Y'ALL LIKE TO DANCE
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ALL DAY.
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HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH.
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CURTIS, HE WAS TALKING ABOUT
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FASTING -- LIKE WHEN JESUS
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FASTED FOR 40 DAYS IN THE
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WILDERNESS?
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OH, NO, I WON'T!
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NO, HE WASN'T!
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HE WASN'T TALKING TO ME!
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I AIN'T GIVING UP MY SECOND
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LOVE!
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I AM NOT -- STOP EATING FOR --
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I'M GOING TO EAT SOMETHING RIGHT
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NOW!
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DON'T EVEN GET IT IN YOUR HEAD,
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ELLA, IT AIN'T GOING TO HAPPEN.
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I'M THE ANTI-FASTER!
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YEAH, AUNTIE ELLA, THAT IS
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CRUEL AND UNUSUAL PUNISHMENT --
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MAKE NO SENSE.
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GIVE ME SOMETHING,
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UNCLE CURTIS, BEFORE SHE MAKE
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ME FAST.
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ALWAYS BRINGING CHURCH HOME.
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THE POINT BEHIND THE WHOLE
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MATTER IS THAT YOU GIVE UP
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SOMETHING SO WE CAN CONCENTRATE
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ON EACH OTHER.
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OKAY, WELL, I'LL GIVE UP
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CHORES.
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I'LL GIVE UP BEETS AND LIVER.
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I'LL GIVE UP COOKING.
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GOOD ONE.
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I'LL GIVE UP WORK.
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YOU ALREADY GAVE THAT UP.
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AND I'LL GIVE UP CALVIN.
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PROBLEM SOLVED.
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THOSE THINGS DO NOT COUNT.
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FASTING IS SACRIFICING SOMETHING
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YOU ENJOY.
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OKAY?
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OKAY, SO, SINCE YOU ALL WON'T
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CHOOSE, I'LL CHOOSE FOR
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EVERYONE, ALL RIGHT?
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UH...
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I GOT IT.
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HA, I GOT IT -- NO ELECTRONIC
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DEVICES FOR ONE WEEK.
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All: WHAT THE HELL?
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WHAT THE --
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HA -- I WISH YOU WOULD.
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I'D HIT YOU SO HARD IN YOUR
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CHEST, YOUR MAMA COUGH.
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AMEN!
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JAZ --
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OKAY, LISTEN, IT WILL NOT KILL
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YOU TO GIVE UP THESE THINGS FOR
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A FEW DAYS.
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IT'S ABOUT FAMILY, THAT'S IT.
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BABY, WE GIVING UP
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ELECTRONICS -- I'M WITH YOU.
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I'M WITH -- I WISH I WENT TO
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CHURCH WITH YOU THIS MORNING,
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I'D HAVE CAUGHT THE LIGHT WAY
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THEN.
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I'M WITH YOU -- NO ELECTRONICS.
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RIGHT.
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OH, THANK YOU.
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THIS IS GREAT.
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OH, THIS IS GREAT.
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THANK YOU, BABY.
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THANK YOU, BABY.
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OKAY --
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NO ELECTRONICS!
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THANK YOU!
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I'LL CHANGE.
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OKAY, BABY, WE GOT YOU, WE
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WITH YOU.
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HEY, CALVIN, GIVE ME THE REMOTE.
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I REALLY ENJOYED YOU IN
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"AMISTAD," BRO.
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THAT WAS TIGHT.
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CAN I HELP YOU?
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YEAH --
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OH, MY GOODNESS!
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CHAD RANDOLPH?
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OH, YOU -- YOU CHAD RANDOLPH,
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THE MOVIE STAR?
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YEAH, MAN.
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YEAH, YEAH, THAT'S -- THAT'S ME.
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HEY, IS THIS IN THE CUT
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BARBERSHOP?
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WHAT TIPPED YOU -- WAS
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IT THE BARBER POLE OR THE
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SIGN IN THE WINDOW SAYING
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"IN THE CUT BARBERSHOP"?
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YEAH, THAT'S GOOD, MAN,
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THAT'S GOOD, I LIKE THAT.
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I TRY, I TRY.
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HEY, LISTEN, I WANT TO KNOW
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IF IT'D BE COOL IF I HUNG OUT
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HERE FOR A COUPLE DAYS, OBSERVE
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THINGS?
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I'M DOING SOME RESEARCH FOR MY
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NEW MOVIE.
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IT'S CALLED "BEVERLY HILLS
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CUTS."
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YEAH, I PLAY A CRIME-FIGHTING
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BARBER.
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OOH.
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[ IMITATES KUNG FU ]
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OH --
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ANYWAY, IT'S NEVER BEEN DONE
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BEFORE, SO --
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AND THERE'S A REASON WHY --
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[ IMITATES KUNG FU ]
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HEY, WHAT'S HAPPENING?
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I COME UP TO SEE THE GAME.
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Y'ALL GOT THE SCORE?
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NO.
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CALVIN BROKE THE TV.
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WHAT -- WHAT?!
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WHERE'S HE AT?
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WELL, HE BROKE IT, SO WE
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SENT HIM TO FIX IT.
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WELL, FORGET ABOUT CALVIN,
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AND FORGET ABOUT THAT STUPID
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GAME.
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OOH.
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'CAUSE WE HAVE THE BIGGEST
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STAR OF THE YEAR IN HERE!
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OH, COME ON.
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THAT'S MY MAN!
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SHEMAR MOORE!
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NO, MORE LIKE SHEMAR LESS.
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CHAD. CHAD RANDOLPH.
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LOOK, GUYS, I'M JUST HERE
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TRYING TO DO SOME RESEARCH.
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YOU KNOW, HOW TO BE A REAL
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BARBER...
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FOR MY NEXT MOVIE.
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[ GIGGLES ]
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AND YOU CHOSE THIS DUMP?
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CURTIS, I KNOW YOU AIN'T
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TALKING ABOUT MY BARBERSHOP.
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HOLD UP, YOU HEARD ABOUT
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THE SKILLS ALL THE WAY IN
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BEVERLY HILLS?
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WHAT?! WE ON THE MAP!
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NO!
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TOLD YOU.
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NO. NO!
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WE'RE FAMOUS.
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YOU GUYS ARE JUST DOWN THE
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STREET FROM MY HOTEL.
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SO WHAT'S THE DEAL?
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ARE WE COOL?
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CAN THE CHAD STAY?
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I DON'T KNOW.
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CAN DE CHAD STAY, DE CURTIS?
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[ GIGGLES ]
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I DON'T KNOW, DE FLOYD.
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I GUESS IT DEPENDS ON YOU DE
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FEEL.
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[ BOTH LAUGH ]
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YOU ARE SO DE CRAZY.
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[ BOTH LAUGH ]
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AND YOU ARE DE MAN.
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[ BOTH LAUGH ]
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[ British accent ] "MAYBE WE
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CAN HAVE A SPOT OF TEA."
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WELL, IF YOU SAY, IT'S OKAY.
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"AS A MATTER OF FACT, LET'S
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GO BACK TO MIGHTY ENGLAND.
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WE HAVE TRANSPORTATION."
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WE HAVE DE TRANSPORTATION.
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YES -- DE AMISTAD.
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[ BOTH LAUGH ]
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DE AMISTAD!
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[ African accent ] "GIVE US DE
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FREE!"
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[ BOTH LAUGH ]
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[ African accent ] "GIVE US
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DE DIAMONDS!"
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"I DON'T HAVE DE DIAMONDS!"
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"GIVE US DE FREE!"
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"I DON'T HAVE DE DIAMONDS!"
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"GIVE US DE FREE."
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[ Normal voice ] WAIT A
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MINUTE, HOLD UP.
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[ African accent ] GIVE US DE
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MONEY.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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HEY!
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WHOO!
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AMISTAD CAN RUN, TOO!
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WHY IS IT SO BRIGHT IN HERE?
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HMM?
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HEY, I-I NEVER REALIZED WE HAD A
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SKYLIGHT.
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MAN, I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR
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A TV ALL DAY!
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[ SIGHS ]
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ANYBODY FIND OUT WHAT THE FINAL
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SCORE OF THE GAME WAS?
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NOPE.
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AUNT ELLA TOOK ALL THE TVs.
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SHE EVEN MADE KEVIN'S MOM
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TAKE HIS AWAY.
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HEY, HOLD UP, HOLD UP.
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I NEVER KNEW WE HAD A SKYLIGHT.
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HEY, MALIK, GO ON YOUR LAPTOP,
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SEE IF YOU CAN GET THE SCORE OF
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THE GAME FOR ME.
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I CAN'T GO TO MY LAPTOP.
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IT'S ELECTRONIC.
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DUH!
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YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS
243
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ELECTRONIC -- A PACEMAKER.
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YOU GOING TO NEED ONE YOU TALK
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TO ME LIKE THAT AGAIN.
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AUNT ELLA AIN'T GOING TO LET
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YOU USE IT.
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WELL, I STILL GOT MY RESISTER
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RADIO.
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[ LAUGHS ]
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YOU MEAN TRANSISTOR RADIO.
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WHATEVER.
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"CURTIS, I TOOK THE BATTERIES
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OUT SO YOU CAN SPEND MORE TIME
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WITH YOUR FAMILY.
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LOVE, ELLA."
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GOD, OH, I'M SICK OF HER!
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SHE TRYING TO KILL ME!
259
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HEY, YOU CAN CHECK THE SCORE
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IF YOU CALL THE SPORTS HOTLINE
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ON YOUR CELLPHONE.
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I DIDN'T EVEN THINK ABOUT
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THAT.
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I DIDN'T EVEN THINK ABOUT THAT.
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GOOD MOVE. GOOD MOVE.
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FORGOT ABOUT THAT.
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UH-UH-UH-UH-UH-UH-UH.
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I'LL TAKE THAT.
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IN FACT, I'LL TAKE ALL
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CELLPHONES.
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MM-HMM.
272
00:06:57,233 --> 00:06:58,067
WAIT A MINUTE, ELLA, YOU
273
00:06:58,067 --> 00:06:58,667
CAN'T DO THAT!
274
00:06:58,667 --> 00:07:00,133
THAT -- THAT'S PUBLIC SAFETY
275
00:07:00,133 --> 00:07:00,833
ISSUE!
276
00:07:00,833 --> 00:07:01,733
RIGHT -- WHAT IF THERE'S AN
277
00:07:01,733 --> 00:07:02,567
EMERGENCY AND WE NEED TO CALL
278
00:07:02,567 --> 00:07:03,967
EACH OTHER?
279
00:07:03,967 --> 00:07:04,700
HA!
280
00:07:04,700 --> 00:07:05,700
YOU'RE ALL HERE IN THE SAME
281
00:07:05,700 --> 00:07:06,533
ROOM.
282
00:07:06,533 --> 00:07:10,367
DUH!
283
00:07:10,367 --> 00:07:12,567
THANK YOU.
284
00:07:12,567 --> 00:07:14,100
AND YOU.
285
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:15,633
AND THANK YOU.
286
00:07:15,633 --> 00:07:16,600
I FEEL LIKE WE'RE BEING
287
00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:17,767
ROBBED.
288
00:07:17,767 --> 00:07:20,600
STICK 'EM UP.
289
00:07:20,600 --> 00:07:22,167
AH!
290
00:07:22,167 --> 00:07:23,900
WELL, THIS IS GREAT.
291
00:07:23,900 --> 00:07:26,433
OH, OH, MY CELLIE -- PLEASE.
292
00:07:26,433 --> 00:07:27,967
NO, I'LL BE BACK FOR YOU, OKAY?
293
00:07:27,967 --> 00:07:30,167
DON'T -- DON'T BE AFRAID.
294
00:07:30,167 --> 00:07:31,067
WOULD YOU TWO LIKE TO GO
295
00:07:31,067 --> 00:07:32,433
OUTSIDE AND PLAY?
296
00:07:32,433 --> 00:07:34,500
EW!
297
00:07:34,500 --> 00:07:37,067
THERE IS DIRT OUTSIDE!
298
00:07:37,067 --> 00:07:38,433
JAZMINE -- YOU KNOW, FORGET
299
00:07:38,433 --> 00:07:40,100
IT, FORGET IT, FORGET IT.
300
00:07:40,100 --> 00:07:40,767
COME ON, CURTIS.
301
00:07:40,767 --> 00:07:41,567
CURTIS, COME ON, BABY, HAVE
302
00:07:41,567 --> 00:07:43,733
A SEAT.
303
00:07:43,733 --> 00:07:46,767
AND, BABY, GIVE ME THAT BACKUP
304
00:07:46,767 --> 00:07:49,100
CELLPHONE.
305
00:07:49,100 --> 00:07:49,800
WHO YOU TALKING TO?
306
00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:51,567
THE BACKUP CELLPHONE.
307
00:07:51,567 --> 00:07:52,867
WE GOT NO BACKUP CELLPHONE.
308
00:07:52,867 --> 00:07:55,567
CURTIS.
309
00:07:55,567 --> 00:07:56,867
COME ON, NOW!
310
00:07:56,867 --> 00:08:00,833
OKAY.
311
00:08:00,833 --> 00:08:02,067
OOH, MY FATHER WARNED ME ABOUT
312
00:08:02,067 --> 00:08:02,767
YOU.
313
00:08:02,767 --> 00:08:05,733
THANK YOU.
314
00:08:05,733 --> 00:08:07,067
WHAT DO WE DO NOW?
315
00:08:07,067 --> 00:08:08,067
OKAY.
316
00:08:08,067 --> 00:08:09,733
ALL RIGHT, THE WHOLE POINT
317
00:08:09,733 --> 00:08:12,100
BEHIND THIS IS THAT WE SPEND
318
00:08:12,100 --> 00:08:17,400
QUALITY TIME TOGETHER.
319
00:08:17,400 --> 00:08:19,067
LET'S GO TO THE MOVIES --
320
00:08:19,067 --> 00:08:20,500
TOGETHER.
321
00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:21,200
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
322
00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:22,900
WE'RE GONNA STAY RIGHT HERE
323
00:08:22,900 --> 00:08:25,067
TOGETHER.
324
00:08:25,067 --> 00:08:27,800
NOW, LET'S TALK.
325
00:08:27,800 --> 00:08:28,967
SURE WISH I HAD MY DOGGONE
326
00:08:28,967 --> 00:08:29,700
SCORE OF THAT GAME...
327
00:08:29,700 --> 00:08:32,700
[ ALL TALKING INDISTINCTLY ]
328
00:08:37,733 --> 00:08:38,933
YES, I'LL -- I'LL GO AND MAKE
329
00:08:38,933 --> 00:08:39,667
SOME LEMONADE.
330
00:08:39,667 --> 00:08:41,533
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
331
00:08:41,533 --> 00:08:43,533
OH -- EH, EH, EH, EH, EH, EH!
332
00:08:45,767 --> 00:08:47,233
HELP ME!
333
00:08:47,233 --> 00:08:48,767
HELP ME!
334
00:08:48,767 --> 00:08:51,067
I'M GETTING MARRIED IN AN HOUR,
335
00:08:51,067 --> 00:08:53,367
AND I TRIED TO CUT MY OWN HAIR!
336
00:08:53,367 --> 00:08:54,967
OOH!
337
00:08:54,967 --> 00:08:57,067
CODE BLUE, CODE BLUE!
338
00:08:57,067 --> 00:08:58,067
GET THIS MAN IN A CHAIR, STAT!
339
00:08:58,067 --> 00:08:59,533
ALL RIGHT, CLEAR, CLEAR!
340
00:08:59,533 --> 00:09:01,233
CLEAR! OW, MAN!
341
00:09:01,233 --> 00:09:01,900
WHAT THE HECK?
342
00:09:01,900 --> 00:09:03,067
OKAY, GET ME 15 cc's OF
343
00:09:03,067 --> 00:09:04,900
BERGAMOT, GIVE ME 10 cc's OF
344
00:09:04,900 --> 00:09:06,300
SOME LAVENDER, GIVE ME SOME
345
00:09:06,300 --> 00:09:07,733
SALVE, GET THE CHICKEN GREASE
346
00:09:07,733 --> 00:09:08,867
OFF THE STOVE, GET ME SOME
347
00:09:08,867 --> 00:09:10,933
FLOUR, AND GET MY BLENDER.
348
00:09:10,933 --> 00:09:11,600
CHICKEN GREASE?
349
00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:12,533
MAN, WHAT YOU DOING, BAKING A
350
00:09:12,533 --> 00:09:13,267
CAKE?
351
00:09:13,267 --> 00:09:14,600
DELANTE, ANESTHESIA.
352
00:09:14,600 --> 00:09:17,467
WAIT, ANA-- WHAT?
353
00:09:17,467 --> 00:09:18,200
THERE IT IS.
354
00:09:18,200 --> 00:09:19,067
ALL RIGHT, YOU READY, KIKI?
355
00:09:19,067 --> 00:09:20,067
HEY, YO, I DON'T THINK THAT'S
356
00:09:20,067 --> 00:09:21,067
GONNA BE ENOUGH.
357
00:09:21,067 --> 00:09:23,567
DELANTE, GO IN THE BACK, IN
358
00:09:23,567 --> 00:09:25,900
THE SAFE, AND GET THE CUTMASTER
359
00:09:25,900 --> 00:09:27,733
2000.
360
00:09:27,733 --> 00:09:31,533
THE CUTMASTER 2000?
361
00:09:31,533 --> 00:09:33,067
THIS IS SERIOUS.
362
00:09:33,067 --> 00:09:34,300
OH, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, IS
363
00:09:34,300 --> 00:09:35,300
THIS GONNA HURT?
364
00:09:35,300 --> 00:09:36,200
HEY, YO, MAN UP!
365
00:09:36,200 --> 00:09:38,200
I'M SORRY!
366
00:09:43,667 --> 00:09:47,067
LOCK AND LOAD!
367
00:09:47,067 --> 00:09:47,967
SORRY, SORRY, THAT'S IN THE
368
00:09:47,967 --> 00:09:48,633
SCRIPT.
369
00:09:48,633 --> 00:09:50,067
YOU GUYS, GO, GO.
370
00:09:50,067 --> 00:09:51,133
HEY, WAIT -- "LOCK AND LOAD"?
371
00:09:51,133 --> 00:09:52,333
HEY, HEY, I KNOW YOU!
372
00:09:52,333 --> 00:09:54,700
YEAH, YOU'RE TERRENCE HOWARD!
373
00:09:54,700 --> 00:09:56,067
HEY, WHAT YOU DOING HERE, MAN?
374
00:09:56,067 --> 00:09:58,400
CHAD. CHAD RANDOLPH!
375
00:09:58,400 --> 00:09:59,333
OH, YEAH, YOU MUCH TALLER IN
376
00:09:59,333 --> 00:10:01,333
PERSON.
377
00:10:03,867 --> 00:10:05,833
ALL RIGHT, Y'ALL...
378
00:10:05,833 --> 00:10:07,933
I'M GOING IN.
379
00:10:07,933 --> 00:10:10,767
OH, LORD!
380
00:10:10,767 --> 00:10:15,467
[ SCREAMS ]
381
00:10:15,467 --> 00:10:17,300
ONE BIG, HAPPY FAMILY OUT
382
00:10:17,300 --> 00:10:18,700
HERE IN THE BACKYARD ALL
383
00:10:18,700 --> 00:10:22,667
TOGETHER -- NO ELECTRONICS!
384
00:10:22,667 --> 00:10:23,400
THIS IS GREAT!
385
00:10:23,400 --> 00:10:25,133
ISN'T THIS GREAT?
386
00:10:25,133 --> 00:10:26,767
All: NO.
387
00:10:26,767 --> 00:10:28,733
DEFINITELY NO.
388
00:10:28,733 --> 00:10:31,200
OKAY, LET'S TRY TO JUST ENJOY
389
00:10:31,200 --> 00:10:33,233
THE SILENCE.
390
00:10:33,233 --> 00:10:34,800
SEE, GOD SPEAKS IN A STILL,
391
00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:35,767
SMALL VOICE.
392
00:10:35,767 --> 00:10:36,933
CAN'T YOU HEAR HIM?
393
00:10:36,933 --> 00:10:37,833
[ GASPS ]
394
00:10:37,833 --> 00:10:39,900
CAN'T YOU JUST HEAR HIM?
395
00:10:39,900 --> 00:10:41,933
* AAH
396
00:10:41,933 --> 00:10:43,367
THE HEAVENS JUST OPENED.
397
00:10:43,367 --> 00:10:44,367
I HEAR HIM!
398
00:10:44,367 --> 00:10:45,400
YES.
399
00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:47,067
YOU KNOW WHAT?
400
00:10:47,067 --> 00:10:50,167
ME, TOO.
401
00:10:50,167 --> 00:10:51,567
I CAN HEAR HIM.
402
00:10:51,567 --> 00:10:52,433
WHAT DID HE SAY, BABY?
403
00:10:52,433 --> 00:10:53,833
HE SAYS HE HAS A MESSAGE FOR
404
00:10:53,833 --> 00:10:55,900
ALL HIS CHILDREN.
405
00:10:55,900 --> 00:10:57,333
WHAT IS HE SAYING, MALIK?
406
00:10:57,333 --> 00:10:59,167
HE SAYS "TO FIND IT OUT, GO
407
00:10:59,167 --> 00:11:00,500
LOOK AT THE TV."
408
00:11:00,500 --> 00:11:02,733
[ LAUGHS ]
409
00:11:02,733 --> 00:11:06,800
[ COUGHS ]
410
00:11:06,800 --> 00:11:07,967
OKAY, EVERYBODY, JUST --
411
00:11:07,967 --> 00:11:08,933
OKAY.
412
00:11:08,933 --> 00:11:11,633
CAN WE JUST -- LET'S JUST TALK,
413
00:11:11,633 --> 00:11:12,533
OKAY?
414
00:11:12,533 --> 00:11:13,433
YOU TOOK OUR CELLPHONES,
415
00:11:13,433 --> 00:11:14,133
REMEMBER?
416
00:11:14,133 --> 00:11:16,067
WELL --
417
00:11:16,067 --> 00:11:19,567
TO EACH OTHER!
418
00:11:19,567 --> 00:11:20,700
OKAY, JAZMINE, COME ON, I KNOW
419
00:11:20,700 --> 00:11:21,900
YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY.
420
00:11:21,900 --> 00:11:24,133
COME ON.
421
00:11:24,133 --> 00:11:24,800
NO.
422
00:11:24,800 --> 00:11:27,167
NO?
423
00:11:27,167 --> 00:11:28,200
OKAY, C.J., WHAT ABOUT YOU?
424
00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:29,700
COME ON, BABY, WHAT ABOUT YOU?
425
00:11:29,700 --> 00:11:30,567
I'M COOL.
426
00:11:30,567 --> 00:11:31,867
"I'M COOL."
427
00:11:31,867 --> 00:11:33,667
OKAY, EVERYONE, TELL SOMETHING
428
00:11:33,667 --> 00:11:36,300
ABOUT YOURSELF THAT NO ONE ELSE
429
00:11:36,300 --> 00:11:37,200
KNOWS.
430
00:11:37,200 --> 00:11:38,433
OOH, I GOT ONE, I GOT ONE.
431
00:11:38,433 --> 00:11:41,333
OKAY, CURTIS -- CURTIS, YES?
432
00:11:41,333 --> 00:11:42,233
C.J. DOESN'T KNOW HE'S
433
00:11:42,233 --> 00:11:42,967
ADOPTED.
434
00:11:42,967 --> 00:11:45,100
WHAT?
435
00:11:45,100 --> 00:11:46,567
WELL, NOW WE GOT SOMETHING
436
00:11:46,567 --> 00:11:48,567
TO TALK ABOUT!
437
00:11:51,733 --> 00:11:52,833
I'M ADOPTED?
438
00:11:52,833 --> 00:11:53,633
IS THIS A JOKE?
439
00:11:53,633 --> 00:11:54,333
FAST OVER!
440
00:11:54,333 --> 00:11:55,800
EVERYBODY, GO WATCH TV!
441
00:11:55,800 --> 00:12:02,400
NO, EVERYBODY, SIT DOWN.
442
00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:04,133
IS THIS TRUE, AUNT ELLA?
443
00:12:04,133 --> 00:12:09,100
[ WHIMPERS ]
444
00:12:09,100 --> 00:12:13,233
[ GRUNTS ]
445
00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:17,900
YES, C.J., IT IS TRUE.
446
00:12:17,900 --> 00:12:20,400
SOMETHING HERE JUST DOES NOT
447
00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:21,533
BELONG.
448
00:12:21,533 --> 00:12:23,067
JAZMINE.
449
00:12:23,067 --> 00:12:27,733
DUCK, DUCK, DUCK, DUCK...
450
00:12:27,733 --> 00:12:30,967
GOOSE.
451
00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:32,133
YOU'RE A GOOSE, DADDY.
452
00:12:32,133 --> 00:12:33,233
OH, YEAH?
453
00:12:33,233 --> 00:12:36,300
DUCK, DUCK, DUCK -- GEESE.
454
00:12:36,300 --> 00:12:39,100
[ LAUGHS ]
455
00:12:39,100 --> 00:12:40,567
FLOCK OF GEESE.
456
00:12:40,567 --> 00:12:41,400
SO, YOU'RE SAYING THAT
457
00:12:41,400 --> 00:12:42,833
UNCLE CURTIS -- HE'S REALLY NOT
458
00:12:42,833 --> 00:12:44,167
OUR UNCLE CURTIS?
459
00:12:44,167 --> 00:12:48,800
HE'S JUST "MR. PAYNE"?
460
00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:50,467
ALL THIS TIME, YOU'RE TELLING
461
00:12:50,467 --> 00:12:52,067
ME THAT WE'VE BEEN LIVING WITH
462
00:12:52,067 --> 00:12:56,100
TOTAL STRANGERS?
463
00:12:56,100 --> 00:12:58,900
WE ARE NOT STRANGERS!
464
00:12:58,900 --> 00:13:00,733
WE ARE FAMILY, AND I DON'T CARE
465
00:13:00,733 --> 00:13:02,633
IF HE IS ADOPTED.
466
00:13:02,633 --> 00:13:03,433
YEAH, MALIK, JAZMINE, GO
467
00:13:03,433 --> 00:13:04,267
IN YOUR ROOM AND LET YOUR DAD
468
00:13:04,267 --> 00:13:05,867
TALK TO MY PARENTS --
469
00:13:05,867 --> 00:13:09,067
MR. AND MRS. PAYNE.
470
00:13:09,067 --> 00:13:10,167
SHUT UP, CALVIN.
471
00:13:10,167 --> 00:13:12,500
UM, EXCUSE ME, MA'AM, UH...
472
00:13:12,500 --> 00:13:13,933
EXCUSE ME, WE'RE NOT SUPPOSED
473
00:13:13,933 --> 00:13:17,633
TO TALK TO STRANGERS.
474
00:13:17,633 --> 00:13:18,433
I'M TRYING TO GET MY
475
00:13:18,433 --> 00:13:19,333
CELLPHONE.
476
00:13:19,333 --> 00:13:21,633
UH, EXCUSE ME, MA'AM, SINCE WE
477
00:13:21,633 --> 00:13:23,667
USED TO, UH, BE FASTING AS A
478
00:13:23,667 --> 00:13:25,433
FAMILY, AND NOW THAT THIS WHOLE
479
00:13:25,433 --> 00:13:26,600
THING HAPPENED AND WE'RE NOT A
480
00:13:26,600 --> 00:13:29,567
FAMILY, CAN I GET MY CELLPHONE
481
00:13:29,567 --> 00:13:32,233
BACK?
482
00:13:32,233 --> 00:13:33,100
MALIK, YOU BETTER GET OUT OF
483
00:13:33,100 --> 00:13:33,867
HERE.
484
00:13:33,867 --> 00:13:37,567
AND YOU BETTER GO WITH HIM.
485
00:13:37,567 --> 00:13:39,800
HEY, POPS...
486
00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:41,867
AM I ADOPTED, TOO?
487
00:13:41,867 --> 00:13:44,233
UNFORTUNATELY, NO.
488
00:13:44,233 --> 00:13:45,533
DANG.
489
00:13:45,533 --> 00:13:46,833
I PUT YOU UP FOR ADOPTION
490
00:13:46,833 --> 00:13:47,600
WHEN YOU WERE IN THE THIRD
491
00:13:47,600 --> 00:13:48,433
GRADE, BUT NOBODY WOULD TAKE
492
00:13:48,433 --> 00:13:49,633
YOU.
493
00:13:49,633 --> 00:13:51,700
THIS IS NOT A JOKE.
494
00:13:51,700 --> 00:13:52,633
YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT MY WHOLE
495
00:13:52,633 --> 00:13:53,567
LIFE IS A LIE?
496
00:13:53,567 --> 00:13:56,133
OH, C.J., PLEASE!
497
00:13:56,133 --> 00:13:58,500
YOUR WHOLE LIFE IS NOT A LIE!
498
00:13:58,500 --> 00:14:02,733
NO, IT'S NOT, NEPHEW.
499
00:14:02,733 --> 00:14:03,733
EXCEPT FOR THE PART WHERE YOU
500
00:14:03,733 --> 00:14:06,567
COME FROM.
501
00:14:06,567 --> 00:14:08,433
AND THE PART ABOUT WHO YOUR
502
00:14:08,433 --> 00:14:13,067
FAMILY IS.
503
00:14:13,067 --> 00:14:15,100
C.J.!
504
00:14:15,100 --> 00:14:16,400
C.J., YOUR BIRTHDAY IS YOUR
505
00:14:16,400 --> 00:14:19,600
BIRTHDAY!
506
00:14:19,600 --> 00:14:21,600
I THINK.
507
00:14:24,067 --> 00:14:24,967
HEY, DANA, WILL YOU HELP ME
508
00:14:24,967 --> 00:14:25,700
RUN SOME LINES?
509
00:14:25,700 --> 00:14:29,067
SURE.
510
00:14:29,067 --> 00:14:30,700
COOL. I'LL DIRECT.
511
00:14:30,700 --> 00:14:31,500
YEAH, OKAY.
512
00:14:31,500 --> 00:14:33,833
UM, SO, ANYWAY, THIS IS THE PART
513
00:14:33,833 --> 00:14:35,467
IN THE MOVIE WHERE I HAVE TO
514
00:14:35,467 --> 00:14:36,433
TELL MY WIFE THAT I'M GOING
515
00:14:36,433 --> 00:14:37,867
UNDERCOVER AT THE BARBERSHOP.
516
00:14:37,867 --> 00:14:38,833
OKAY.
517
00:14:38,833 --> 00:14:39,833
AND I MIGHT NOT BE BACK,
518
00:14:39,833 --> 00:14:41,067
SO...
519
00:14:41,067 --> 00:14:42,267
OKAY, GOT IT.
520
00:14:42,267 --> 00:14:43,133
OKAY? ALL RIGHT.
521
00:14:43,133 --> 00:14:45,567
READY? ACTION.
522
00:14:45,567 --> 00:14:47,067
GIVE ME A MINUTE.
523
00:14:47,067 --> 00:14:51,300
[ INHALING, EXHALING DEEPLY ]
524
00:14:51,300 --> 00:14:52,067
OKAY.
525
00:14:52,067 --> 00:14:52,700
ACTION.
526
00:14:52,700 --> 00:14:54,867
DARLA!
527
00:14:54,867 --> 00:14:56,833
I HAVE TO GO UNDERCOVER...
528
00:14:56,833 --> 00:14:59,467
AT THE BARBERSHOP...
529
00:14:59,467 --> 00:15:01,667
AND I MIGHT NOT COME BACK.
530
00:15:01,667 --> 00:15:04,200
BUT IF SOMETHING HAPPENS TO ME,
531
00:15:04,200 --> 00:15:06,267
I WANT YOU TO KNOW...
532
00:15:06,267 --> 00:15:08,867
I'LL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!
533
00:15:08,867 --> 00:15:10,700
[ CHUCKLES ]
534
00:15:10,700 --> 00:15:12,100
OH.
535
00:15:12,100 --> 00:15:15,267
I'LL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!
536
00:15:15,267 --> 00:15:17,300
[ SIGHS ]
537
00:15:17,300 --> 00:15:20,967
I'LL ALWAYS --
538
00:15:20,967 --> 00:15:21,833
DANA, BABY, YOU GOT A LINE
539
00:15:21,833 --> 00:15:22,900
THERE.
540
00:15:22,900 --> 00:15:24,100
OH, I'M SORRY. OKAY.
541
00:15:24,100 --> 00:15:25,267
[ CHUCKLES ]
542
00:15:25,267 --> 00:15:25,933
OKAY.
543
00:15:25,933 --> 00:15:27,267
[ CLEARS THROAT ]
544
00:15:27,267 --> 00:15:29,433
DIRK!
545
00:15:29,433 --> 00:15:31,100
PLEASE DON'T GO!
546
00:15:31,100 --> 00:15:33,467
LISTEN!
547
00:15:33,467 --> 00:15:36,833
I...AM A BARBER!
548
00:15:36,833 --> 00:15:38,200
OKAY.
549
00:15:38,200 --> 00:15:41,333
THIS IS WHAT I DO.
550
00:15:41,333 --> 00:15:43,667
[ CLEARS THROAT ]
551
00:15:43,667 --> 00:15:47,067
BUT BEFORE YOU GO...
552
00:15:47,067 --> 00:15:49,100
GIVE ME ONE LAST KISS...
553
00:15:49,100 --> 00:15:50,400
BECAUSE YOU MIGHT GET INJURED...
554
00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:51,067
[ EXHALES ]
555
00:15:51,067 --> 00:15:51,833
...OR MAIMED...
556
00:15:51,833 --> 00:15:52,567
AH.
557
00:15:52,567 --> 00:15:54,733
...OR KILLED!
558
00:15:54,733 --> 00:15:56,700
AS A BARBER?
559
00:15:56,700 --> 00:15:58,700
NO WONDER YOUR MOVIES SUCK.
560
00:16:05,067 --> 00:16:06,833
[ SIGHS ]
561
00:16:06,833 --> 00:16:09,333
C.J., IT'S ABOUT TIME.
562
00:16:09,333 --> 00:16:10,933
THANK YOU FOR COMING HOME.
563
00:16:10,933 --> 00:16:12,233
HEY.
564
00:16:12,233 --> 00:16:13,267
WHERE ARE THE KIDS?
565
00:16:13,267 --> 00:16:14,833
THEY'RE IN THE BED.
566
00:16:14,833 --> 00:16:15,500
COME ON, SIT DOWN.
567
00:16:15,500 --> 00:16:17,500
WE NEED TO TALK.
568
00:16:20,767 --> 00:16:22,767
YEAH.
569
00:16:27,333 --> 00:16:28,233
HOW COME YOU TWO NEVER TOLD ME
570
00:16:28,233 --> 00:16:29,833
I WAS ADOPTED?
571
00:16:29,833 --> 00:16:31,700
C.J.!
572
00:16:31,700 --> 00:16:33,900
WELL, AFTER YOUR PARENTS DIED,
573
00:16:33,900 --> 00:16:35,067
THAT WAS NOT THE RIGHT TIME TO
574
00:16:35,067 --> 00:16:35,733
TELL YOU.
575
00:16:35,733 --> 00:16:37,500
IT WOULD'VE BEEN TOO MUCH.
576
00:16:37,500 --> 00:16:39,067
YEAH, I MEAN, IT JUST --
577
00:16:39,067 --> 00:16:40,333
THERE NEVER WAS A GOOD TIME TO
578
00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:41,767
TELL YOU.
579
00:16:41,767 --> 00:16:43,300
YOU GOT MARRIED EARLY.
580
00:16:43,300 --> 00:16:44,767
YOU MARRIED EARLY, C.J.
581
00:16:44,767 --> 00:16:45,500
YES.
582
00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:47,600
WASN'T GONNA TELL YOU THEN.
583
00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:48,700
AND THEN, THREE MONTHS AFTER
584
00:16:48,700 --> 00:16:51,800
YOU MARRIED, YOU HAD MALIK --
585
00:16:51,800 --> 00:16:54,267
WASN'T A GOOD TIME TO TELL YOU.
586
00:16:54,267 --> 00:16:55,167
YOU KNOW, AND THEN WE THOUGHT
587
00:16:55,167 --> 00:16:56,433
ABOUT -- WHEN WE STARTED TALKING
588
00:16:56,433 --> 00:16:58,233
ABOUT TELLING YOU AGAIN, JAZZY
589
00:16:58,233 --> 00:16:58,900
WAS COMING UP.
590
00:16:58,900 --> 00:16:59,900
EVERYBODY -- "OH, WE GOT TO --
591
00:16:59,900 --> 00:17:01,567
WE GOT JAZZY."
592
00:17:01,567 --> 00:17:02,667
AND SO, THAT WASN'T -- WASN'T
593
00:17:02,667 --> 00:17:04,900
GONNA TELL YOU THEN.
594
00:17:04,900 --> 00:17:05,767
MY PARENTS DIED
595
00:17:05,767 --> 00:17:06,800
WHEN I WAS 15 YEARS OLD.
596
00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:08,167
YOU MEAN TO TELL ME IN ALL THAT
597
00:17:08,167 --> 00:17:09,433
TIME, YOU COULDN'T FIND THE
598
00:17:09,433 --> 00:17:10,767
RIGHT MOMENT TO TELL ME I WAS
599
00:17:10,767 --> 00:17:13,667
ADOPTED?
600
00:17:13,667 --> 00:17:15,967
OKAY, C.J.?
601
00:17:15,967 --> 00:17:16,767
HAVE YOU EVER LOOKED AT THE
602
00:17:16,767 --> 00:17:18,800
FAMILY PICTURES?
603
00:17:18,800 --> 00:17:20,933
THIS ONE -- HAVE YOU EVER --
604
00:17:20,933 --> 00:17:21,933
I MEAN, HAVE YOU EVER TOOK A
605
00:17:21,933 --> 00:17:23,633
GLANCE?
606
00:17:23,633 --> 00:17:24,633
SEE, LOOK AT IT -- LOOK AT IT
607
00:17:24,633 --> 00:17:25,500
NOW.
608
00:17:25,500 --> 00:17:28,500
HINDSIGHT IS ALWAYS 20/20, WHICH
609
00:17:28,500 --> 00:17:31,067
ADDS UP TO 40.
610
00:17:31,067 --> 00:17:32,133
AND WE CAN'T -- LOOK AT IT --
611
00:17:32,133 --> 00:17:32,933
LOOK, BABY, YOU WAS CUTE IN
612
00:17:32,933 --> 00:17:33,533
THAT.
613
00:17:33,533 --> 00:17:34,200
AH.
614
00:17:34,200 --> 00:17:35,067
YOU WAS CUTE IN THAT ONE.
615
00:17:35,067 --> 00:17:35,733
[ CHUCKLES ]
616
00:17:35,733 --> 00:17:36,667
YOU STILL DON'T GET IT?
617
00:17:36,667 --> 00:17:37,333
THANK YOU.
618
00:17:37,333 --> 00:17:38,167
STILL DON'T GET IT.
619
00:17:38,167 --> 00:17:39,333
OKAY, LOOK.
620
00:17:39,333 --> 00:17:40,667
OKAY.
621
00:17:40,667 --> 00:17:41,933
OKAY, HERE.
622
00:17:41,933 --> 00:17:42,833
LOOK AT.
623
00:17:42,833 --> 00:17:43,500
CURTIS?
624
00:17:43,500 --> 00:17:45,200
WHAT?
625
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:46,133
I'M JUST GONNA BREAK IT DOWN FOR
626
00:17:46,133 --> 00:17:47,567
HIM, THAT'S ALL.
627
00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:49,667
OKAY, HERE WE GO.
628
00:17:49,667 --> 00:17:52,133
WE GOT A BLACK CRAYON.
629
00:17:52,133 --> 00:17:54,067
THIS IS YOUR FATHER.
630
00:17:54,067 --> 00:17:56,300
THIS IS -- THIS IS MY BROTHER,
631
00:17:56,300 --> 00:17:56,967
OKAY?
632
00:17:56,967 --> 00:17:58,533
BLACK CRAYON.
633
00:17:58,533 --> 00:17:59,233
OKAY.
634
00:17:59,233 --> 00:18:00,233
OH, AND ANOTHER DARK ONE --
635
00:18:00,233 --> 00:18:01,067
THIS IS ANOTHER BLACK CRAYON.
636
00:18:01,067 --> 00:18:02,700
THIS IS YOUR MOTHER.
637
00:18:02,700 --> 00:18:07,067
THIS IS YOUR MOTHER.
638
00:18:07,067 --> 00:18:09,067
THIS IS YOU.
639
00:18:09,067 --> 00:18:10,333
IT JUST AIN'T -- IT JUST
640
00:18:10,333 --> 00:18:12,367
AIN'T...
641
00:18:12,367 --> 00:18:13,567
IT JUST AIN'T -- IT JUST
642
00:18:13,567 --> 00:18:16,933
DON'T -- IT AIN'T -- IT LIKE...
643
00:18:16,933 --> 00:18:17,667
LOOK LIKE THAT.
644
00:18:17,667 --> 00:18:20,467
HE JUST CAN'T -- "OH, HE COMING,
645
00:18:20,467 --> 00:18:21,133
HE COMING.
646
00:18:21,133 --> 00:18:21,800
WHERE YOU AT?
647
00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:22,467
LOOK HOW BIG."
648
00:18:22,467 --> 00:18:23,633
AND THEN YOU CAME.
649
00:18:23,633 --> 00:18:24,867
YOU CAME.
650
00:18:24,867 --> 00:18:26,533
AND IT JUST AIN'T...
651
00:18:26,533 --> 00:18:27,267
KIND OF LOOK LIKE --
652
00:18:27,267 --> 00:18:28,067
IT JUST AIN'T --
653
00:18:28,067 --> 00:18:29,133
LOOK LIKE -- RIGHT THERE.
654
00:18:29,133 --> 00:18:29,900
RIGHT.
655
00:18:29,900 --> 00:18:30,567
RIGHT.
656
00:18:30,567 --> 00:18:33,333
RIGHT. RIGHT!
657
00:18:33,333 --> 00:18:34,667
LIKE THAT.
658
00:18:34,667 --> 00:18:36,867
C.J., LISTEN, BABY.
659
00:18:36,867 --> 00:18:39,967
YOU ARE A PART OF THIS FAMILY.
660
00:18:39,967 --> 00:18:42,533
AND NOT ONE TIME HAVE WE EVER
661
00:18:42,533 --> 00:18:43,800
TREATED YOU LIKE YOU WERE
662
00:18:43,800 --> 00:18:44,867
ADOPTED.
663
00:18:44,867 --> 00:18:47,367
NEVER.
664
00:18:47,367 --> 00:18:49,300
YEAH, I GUESS YOU'RE RIGHT.
665
00:18:49,300 --> 00:18:50,533
YOU GUYS HAVE TREATED ME LIKE
666
00:18:50,533 --> 00:18:51,867
YOU WERE MY REAL PARENTS.
667
00:18:51,867 --> 00:18:52,867
YES.
668
00:18:52,867 --> 00:18:53,567
YEAH.
669
00:18:53,567 --> 00:18:54,267
YEAH.
670
00:18:54,267 --> 00:18:55,367
THAT'S BECAUSE WE BOTH LOVE
671
00:18:55,367 --> 00:18:56,267
YOU, C.J.
672
00:18:56,267 --> 00:18:58,300
WELL, SPEAK FOR YOURSELF.
673
00:18:58,300 --> 00:18:59,333
I MEAN, "LOVE" IS SUCH A BIG
674
00:18:59,333 --> 00:19:01,433
WORD.
675
00:19:01,433 --> 00:19:02,300
CURTIS?
676
00:19:02,300 --> 00:19:03,100
I LOVE YOU.
677
00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:07,067
LOVE YOU, TOO, BABY.
678
00:19:07,067 --> 00:19:09,067
MMM!
39907
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