Original subtitles

C.J.: oh, boy.

Curt: whew!

I think this is gonna be

The big one, baby.

Ella: yep.

C.J.: malik, jazmine,

Hurry up!

Y'all gonna be late for school!

Ella: they should cancel

School.

The weather report says that the

Tornadoes will be throughout

The area.

C.J.: I think they downgraded

It.

Curtis: you never can be too

Safe.

This might be the quiet before

The storm.

C.J.: you guys are

Overdressed.

Jazmine: [ mumbling ]

Curtis: you telling me that's

All I needed was a scarf to shut

Her up?

Malik: I checked on the

Internet, and they said this is

Gonna be the big one.

Curtis: look, you ain't got

To worry about nothing.

'cause even if a tornado comes,

It's gonna blow you about...

Look at that.

What's that -- 2 feet?

You didn't even move!

Now, jazi...

Whoop!

Look. It's a wrap.

Baby, that tornado will blow you

All the way to oz.

Uncle gonna tell you how to get

Home if that happens.

Say, "There's no place like

Home, that's no place --"

Wait a minute.

You don't even have a home.

Jazmine: daddy, I don't want

To go to oz.

C.J.: don't worry, baby.

You won't have to.

Ella: and don't listen to

Your uncle.

Malik: hey, but if a brother

Got to fly or swim, he might not

Be able to turn in his homework.

C.J.: nice try, son.

Curtis: hey, when I was

Coming up, a storm was a good

Thing.

We used to get our skates out,

Get a kite -- whew, boy!

We ride the wind like a pony!

Yee-haw!

Malik: ain't no wind in the

World can carry you like a pony.

Yee-haw!

Curtis: I like your style,

Boy.

He growing on me.

He growing on me.

C.J.: y'all don't have to

Worry.

That tornado is not even gonna

Hit us.

It ain't even start raining yet.

Y'all can still walk to school.

All: whoa!

Ella: close it!

C.J.: I'll drive you.

Angel: is it getting worse

Out there?

Keenan: yeah. It's terrible.

Trees are falling down

Everywhere.

Calvin: yep.

Opportunity knocks.

There are scared honeys all over

The city just waiting to be

Rescued.

Angel: grow up.

Calvin: hey, don't let the

Baby face fool you.

Trust me, baby, I'm grown.

I'm wearing her down.

Keenan: she has a shank in

Your back.

C.J.: I'm actually glad the

Phone lines are down.

That means that the bill

Collectors won't be calling me

Today.

Curtis: will you guys be

Serious?

We're getting phone calls every

Five minutes, which means you're

Probably gonna have to go back

Out there.

Bart: I was struck by

Lightning once.

Keenan: really?

What are the odds of that?

Bart: well, happened to me

Twice.

Curtis: that explains a lot.

Dispatcher: engine company 5,

Wake up, y'all!

There's a car entrapment over on

Juniper and 5th with possible

Injuries.

Now, get on over there.

And while you're there, could

You just check on my dog and

Close my windows?

Curtis: okay, guys, come on.

Let's go, let's go, let's go.

Uh, bart, except for you.

I don't want you to get struck

By lightning again.

Matter of fact, stand over

There.

And, you, go in his place.

Angel: está bien, chief.

Curtis: what the hell she

Say?

Bart: thank god, chief.

Finally I get to take a break.

Curtis: ain't gonna be no

Breaks, bart.

If I don't sit down,

You don't sit down.

Bart: but you are sitting

Down, chief.

Curtis: will you shut up?

Go help with the phones.

Bart: it's a cordless phone.

Can I just lay down and answer

It, chief?

Calvin: whoa. Pops.

It's worse than I thought out

There.

Can I please be a paid

Volunteer?

I'm risking my life.

Curtis: what you talking

About, boy?!

Don't be so dramatic!

It's just rain, okay?!

It's rain!

You can handle it!

I got insurance on you if

Anything happens!

You got to do it for the people,

Okay?!

Just know that I love you!

Bye, son!

Calvin: ow!

Curtis: sorry.

I love that boy.

[ telephone rings ]

Hello? Chief payne.

Larry.

Say what?

No, I ain't sending nobody.

Don't you owe me $100?

I bet you'll pay me back next

Time.

Then drown then!

C.J.: 1...2...

[ thunder crashes ]

Bart: ooh, that storm is

Getting closer, c.J.

Curtis: what are you guys

Doing?

C.J.: tracking the storm.

Bart: yeah, see, chief, if

You count between the lightning

And the thunder, you can tell

How close the storm is.

Curtis: okay.

You guys need a hobby.

[ telephone rings ]

Chief payne.

Oh. Okay. All right.

I can send one.

C.J., they got a power line --

Just went down over on mooreland

And oakwood, so go handle it.

And don't touch the power line.

C.J.: okay.

All right, uncle c.

Reporter: once again,

A tornado has been

Spotted in cobb county.

Ella: wait a minute!

What are you doing?

Claretha: trying to get in

Here!

I'm not gonna front, ella,

I'm scared.

I had to chase my wig for two

Blocks!

Ella: this is not getting any

Better.

I'm gonna call c.J., see if he's

Gonna pick up these kids.

Poor jazi must be scared to

Death.

Hello, c.J.? Hey!

Can you hear me?

Honey, can you -- can you hear

Me?

C.J., I'm going to pick -- I'm

Going to pick up the kids!

C.J.!

I'm gonna go and pick up the

Kids!

The call dropped.

Claretha: oh. Let me try my

Phone.

Breaker, breaker.

This is mother goose.

Does anyone copy?

Breaker, breaker.

This is mother goose.

Does anyone copy?

Oh!

Girl, it's worse than I thought.

Ella: I'm going to get my

Kids.

Come on.

Claretha: oh, no, baby.

You go on ahead.

I'm gonna hold down the fort

Here.

Ella: claretha, put a chin

Strap on that wig and come on!

Ooh. Hurry up.

I got your umbrella, baby.

Oh, no!

Claretha: oh, no!

Ella, my wig is blowing!

Jazmine: [ screaming ]

Ella: jazi!

Jazmine: I don't want to go!

Auntie el! Auntie el!

I don't want to go to oz!

Ella: I got you!

I got you!

Jazmine: there's no place

Like home!

There's no place like home!

Ella: jazmine, get in there!

Get in that house!

[ wind howling ]

Get those coats off my couch.

Claretha: are you guys okay?

Jazmine: malik was more

Scared than me.

Malik: no, I wasn't.

I wasn't scared.

Jazmine: boy, please.

When the thunder was going, you

Screamed like a little girl.

Malik: you did, too.

Jazmine: I am a little girl,

You moron.

Ella: okay, that's enough.

That's enough.

Claretha: yeah, you kids are

Working my one good nerve I have

Left.

Ella: ohh!

[ all screaming ]

Okay, wait, wait, wait.

Let me call c.J.

C.J.?

C.J.? Hey, baby.

Can you hear me?

I -- I have the kids.

C.J.?

C.J.!

Okay, okay, that's it.

Let's go to the firehouse.

Claretha: good idea.

I need to be around some big,

Strong men...

And curtis.

C.J.: hello. Ms. Jamieson?

Hi, I'm here to pick up malik

And jazmine payne.

Nicole: oh, hey, mr. Payne.

Nice to finally meet you.

C.J.: yeah. Same here.

I'm sorry about jazmine stealing

The hamster when I was out of

Town and malik sending you the

Love notes.

My kids are a little crazy.

Nicole: no, it's okay.

Actually, malik and jazmine went

Home with their aunt.

C.J.: oh.

Oh, well, she called me, but I

Didn't really get a chance to

Talk to her.

Nicole: I'm sure they're home

By now.

C.J.: okay.

Well, uh, nice to meet you.

Nicole: okay. Take care.

C.J.: um, listen, are you

Gonna be okay, 'cause I think

You're the only one here.

Nicole: yeah. I'm fine.

I mean, I don't want to drive

In this weather, and...

I have plenty of work to do.

[ thunder rumbles ]

[ crashing ]

C.J.: whoa.

Nicole: whoa.

C.J.: a tree fell.

Right in the parking lot

Entrance.

Nicole: well, it's a good

Thing I didn't park in the lot.

Okay. See ya.

C.J.: hey!

Nicole: I'm just kidding.

Just jokes.

[ sighing ] Okay.

Phone's dead.

My cell has no signal.

C.J.: yeah, me, neither.

Let me check my radio.

Uncle curtis?

Uncle curtis, you copy?

Uncle curtis, come in.

There's no answer.

I guess we're gonna be here a

While.

Nicole: okay.

C.J.: [ sighing ] Oh, man.

How can you work at a time like

This?

Nicole: easy.

Because pacing back and forth

Isn't gonna change anything.

We're stuck here until help

Comes...

Mr. Fireman who is supposed to

Be in charge of fire and rescue.

There's no need to stress if you

Can't control anything.

C.J.: is that a fact, or is

That something you read in a

Fortune cookie?

Nicole: [ chuckles ]

So the fireman has jokes.

No, it's a fact.

Plus I have a ton of work to do.

C.J.: yeah. Me too.

I mean, you know, you're not the

Only one with a job.

Nicole: right, because unless

I set fire to this office, you

Can relax.

Curtis: c.J., do you copy?

C.J.: go for c.J.

Curtis: what's your 20, son?

C.J.: I'm at the kids' school

With ms. Jamieson.

A tree fell.

It's blocking the parking lot

Entrance, so can you send help?

Curtis: the roads are

Flooded.

It'll be a while.

So sit tight.

C.J.: copy that.

Curtis: hey, c.J.

You copy?

C.J.: go for c.J.

Curtis: ms. Jamieson is cute,

Ain't she?

C.J.: uh, y-yeah.

She all right.

Curtis: yeah, boy...

[ laughs ]

I think she's single.

C.J.: goodbye, uncle curtis.

Can you send help, please?

Curtis: all right, boy.

Hey, hey!

Bye, ms. Jamieson.

Nicole: bye, mr. Payne.

He's crazy.

C.J.: [ sighs ]

Nicole: [ exhales ]

C.J.: [ humming softly ]

Nicole: mr. Payne?

Mr. Payne!

C.J.: oh. [ chuckles ]

My bad. I'm sorry.

I'm just a little bored.

That's all. Yeah.

Nicole: okay.

Obviously I'm not gonna get any

Work done.

[ sighs ]

So...

What do you want to do?

C.J.: what do I want to do?

[ chuckles ]

Nicole: play pat-a-cake or

Something?

C.J.: pat-a-cake?

Nicole: mm-hmm.

C.J.: no, I don't want to

Play pat-a-cake.

I'm a grown man.

I don't play pat-a-cake.

Nicole: * miss mary mack,

Mack, mack *

* all dressed in black, black,

Black *

I can't believe you know that.

C.J.: man, I don't know that,

Man, come on.

Are you serious?

Don't forget, I do have a little

Girl.

Nicole: yes, yes, you do.

Jazmine is very, very cute.

She must get that from her

Mother.

C.J.: ho ho! Okay.

Oh, assistant principal got

Jokes, huh?

Nicole: yeah.

C.J.: you got chills.

Are you -- are you cold?

Nicole: a little.

C.J.: you want my jacket?

Nicole: yeah. Thank you.

Thanks.

C.J.: just doing my job.

That's all.

Nicole: you know, being cold

Is not a crisis.

C.J.: [ chuckles ]

It is kind of dangerous to be

Cold.

You could go into shock or,

You know, hypothermia.

You know.

Or you could lose a pinkie toe.

[ both laugh ]

Nicole: so I guess you are a

Comedian.

C.J.: yeah, well, you know,

It comes natural.

So, um, what made you want to

Become a principal?

Nicole: assistant principal.

For now.

C.J.: assistant principal.

Yeah.

Nicole: education is just

Really big in my family.

I come from a long line of

Teachers.

C.J.: really?

Nicole: mm-hmm. Yeah.

And I think it's best to get

Them and reach them while

They're young.

Plus, I love kids, and I think

This is probably one of the most

Important professions there is.

Next to firefighting, of course.

C.J.: well, for me, it was

Either run track -- 'cause I ran

Track -- or fight fires.

Yeah.

But my asthma -- I had a little

Asthma -- and I had a knee

Brace 'cause I had a bad leg.

It kept me from going pro.

But other than that, I was --

Olympics and everything.

Nicole: really?

C.J.: yeah, you know?

Nicole: personally, I think

Saving lives is more important

Than running around some track.

C.J.: well, I think that that

Might be true, but the money in

Professional athletics

[whistles] Is a little better.

Nicole: yeah.

You might be right.

But you should be glad you

Became a fireman, because you

Look good in your uniform.

[ both chuckle ]

C.J.: yeah?

Nicole: yeah.

C.J.: well, uh...

Not as good as you do.

'cause you...

[ whistles ]

...Are killing me right now.

Curtis: all right.

Okay. Okay.

So he lost a few cool points

With the pat-a-cake, but I got

$10 that say he kisses her.

Calvin: I got $20 that says

He doesn't.

Angel: $25 says he does.

Sharing his jacket was a nice

Move.

Keenan: that pit-a-pat thing

Threw me for a loop.

I'm not sure which way to go.

Curtis: shh!

Nicole: I wonder what life is

Really all about.

It definitely isn't about money.

I think it's more about love and

Friendship.

What about you?

C.J.: if I had to guess, I

Would probably say...

Friendship.

Nicole: and why not love?

C.J.: well, as pat benatar

Once said, "Love is a

Battlefield."

Keenan: tell me he did not

Quote pat benatar!

Curtis: what the hell is he

Doing?

Okay. I want to change my bet.

Calvin: no, no.

Make it double or nothing.

Bart: spandex and headbands?

Count me in.

Ella: you guys are so silly.

Why are you listening to that

Man's conversation?

Claretha: you all are really

Being nosy -- oh!

Curtis, turn up the volume.

Jazmine: this is boring.

I'm bored.

Ella: read a book.

Malik: y'all got a lifeboat?

All: shh!

Malik: a flotation device?

All: shh!

Malik: a life jacket?

Curtis: will you hush?!

Malik: can y'all give a

Brother something?

Ella: can you be quiet?

We're trying to hear.

I mean, uh, they trying to

Hear.

Nicole: so, what do you like

To do with your free time?

C.J.: well, I don't really

Have any.

Between my work and my kids, I'm

Pretty busy.

Nicole: well, you have to

Make the time, or otherwise the

Stress will kill you.

Trust me.

C.J.: okay...Oprah.

You know, you're pretty cool,

Ms. Jamieson.

Nicole: call me nicole.

C.J.: nicole? Okay.

Well, uh, you can call me c.J.

Keenan: what does this woman

Look like?

Curtis: she is fine, jack.

Malik: too good for dad.

Nicole: oh, my goodness,

Your ears are red.

Do you want to share your jacket

With me?

C.J.: um...Yeah.

Yeah, I am cold.

So, um, can I ask you a

Question?

Nicole: shoot.

C.J.: would you like to have

Lunch with me?

Nicole: are you asking me on

A date?

C.J.: well, uh, sort of, kind

Of, yeah.

Nicole: yeah.

I-I, uh, I don't think so.

This -- this is just totally

Inappropriate.

You come in here during a time

Of crisis, and you just put the

Moves on me?

C.J.: I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I just thought that --

Nicole: gotcha.

[ both laugh ]

You're not the only comedian in

The room, mr. Funny fireman.

C.J.: so, um, is that a yes?

Nicole: yeah.

Yeah, I would like to go to

Lunch with you.

Oh. Okay.

Okay. What just happened?

C.J.: I don't know, but can

We do it again?

Curtis: what just happened?

What just happened?!

You back in the game!

The player's back!

The player's back!

[ cheering ]

Yeah, boy!

C.J.: oh, the "Talk" button

Was pushed in.

Have you been listening the

Whole time?

Curtis: boy, you was better

Than the soap opera!

I wanted to make some popcorn.

C.J.: uncle c, could you send

Help, please?

We're cold over here.

Curtis: no, you're not.

You sound like you hot to me.

[ laughter ]

We working on it, we working on

It.

Your boy want to talk to you.

Malik: dad, I just want you

To know I have no hard feelings.

Ms. Jamieson chose you.

Hey, ms. Jamieson.

Nicole: h-hey, malik.

Curtis: uh, thanks, son.

Son, who else is listening?

Jazmine: everybody is

Listening, daddy.

We had snacks and everything.

Oh, and by the way, we're gonna

Have a talk when you get home.

C.J.: everybody?

Bart: yeah. Everybody.

That's right.

On three -- 1, 2, 3.

* miss mary mack, mack, mack *

* all dressed in black *

Nicole: I am so embarrassed.

C.J.: that's my family.

[ laughter ]

C.J.: you're right here.

Why don't you answer the phone?

Curtis: I'm eating.

C.J.: hello?

Yeah, this is he.

I don't know any

Nicole jamieson. Who?

How you get this phone number?

Gotcha.

[ laughs ]

Yeah, yeah, I'm glad to see you

Got home safely.

Yeah, I can't wait to see you,

Too.

All right. Take care.

That's your boy.

Curtis: ha ha!

He's back!

The player is back!

He's a little corny,

But he's back.