Original subtitles

Step right up! Only high-quality items!

Any game software?

Like soft ice cream?

This is just junk.

Let's go.

What're you calling JUNK!? Y'little whippersnappers!

- Hey, baby! - Huh?

Buy something! If you're broke, I can take panties on layaway.

Don't be stupid.

You're passing up a deal!

Gramps, whatcha doin'?

Business, obviously.

- "Business"? - What kind?

I get it!

You're sellin' off all the panties you stole.

I would never get so desperate to sell my prized collection!

Delivery here!

But we didn't order any delivery.

Great-Grandma made new type ramen. You taste, Ranma!

You put somethin' in it, didn't you?

Like before with that love potion in the pork buns.

Is just ramen noodles. You will think be too delicious!

What's with all the junk?

It's NOT junk!

Could you help out a poor, old man and buy something?

Let's see.

Is all old useless.

Great-Grandma, I like this very much. I buy!

I thought I had lost this. But here it was.

I buy for ¥ 10.

I'd never sell the magic mirror.

"Magic mirror"?

Alexander the Great brought this mirror down the Silk Road.

It's a legendary mirror imported here from China.

That's a rare find.

You have some impressive antiques.

So where'd you steal THIS one from?

I'm insulted! This holds my dear memories of youthful love!

It was when I was only 1 8.

I traveled to China for training.

And in a small village, I fell in love with a beautiful girl.

But love is forbidden to a warrior in training.

Farewell!

My beloved Happosai!

At least take this--

"Take this with you, so it may be with you where I cannot."

Are you LISTENING to me!?

We're listenin'. So what happened to the girl?

That was the last I ever saw of her.

Really? Too bad.

I'm sure she pined away for me, and is now a poor spinster.

How I suffer from the guilt of it!

That's a good one! Love your imagination!

Chinese women no so weak!

She's probably having lunch with all her grandchildren right now.

You young'uns have no idea what morals were like back then!

I've heard many stories like that.

There was a story like that in MY home town.

But as THAT story goes--

Me-love-yous!

The foreigner made passes at all the women, and was rejected.

Then he stole all our valuables and headed for the hills.

Stop, thief!!

There are bad people all over.

You're trying to hide your guilt, you worthless thief!

What're YOU so mad at? A woman scorned--

Be quiet, you!

My wall! Master, what happened?

This is awful!

And you, my good woman, control yourself.

And now you will return my magic mirror!

What!?

You mean the owner of this mirror is--?

No! You can't be Cologne!

Long time, no see, Happy.

- "Happy"!? - Who's Cologne?

That Great-Grandma's real name.

Only Cologne would know my secret nickname!

She's said "Happy"!

He said "Cologne"!

Great-Grandma, why you never mention him before?

I buried the memory deep where it could never haunt me.

- And you, Gramps? - Do you need to ASK!?

Look at the situation.

You may not understand the pain that long years can bring.

I thought those youthful memories were locked and buried away.

But to bring them to the present is a meaningless, futile effort.

How hollow! Farewell! The fond memories of my youth are ruined!

W-What's going on!?

Wha-- Wha--

N--NO!!

Everyone! Lunch is ready.

That's odd. I was sure I heard their voices.

So what's going on here?

It's not a dream, right?

Saotome, any clues?

I'm in the dark too. How about you, Master?

I dunno.

It happened just as I feared.

What you fear?

This is China's past.

"China's past"!?

If someone cries on the mirror. . .

you're transported to the world of that person's memories.

Not just the person, but everyone nearby at the time.

It's a terrible power!

Sounds like fun!

Since we're here anyway, let's make the best of it.

You're right. And we can buy gifts for Kasumi and Nabiki.

Maybe there's a nice hot-springs.

Let's live it up!

Good idea! Count me in!

- Go away! - Stop it!

Wait up! Let's get hitched!

C'mon!

Don't be stingy!

What a maroon! Serves him right!

That is the young Happosai.

You can't mean that! I looked like--

What was that for!?

Nobody'd believe that one.

I didn't lie! I'd NEVER lie!

Tendo?

Saotome?

What's with you guys!?

Don't ask questions!

Just prepare yourself for battle!

Dad!

We won!

We beat the master!

We did it, Saotome!

You fools!

What are you doing?

To hit him means you're hitting your master!!

- Really? - But I thought you looked like--

Yeah, just like that!

Hey, you! Get up!

Stand up! Do you call yourself a man!?

Don't go actin' all high an' mighty, y'old fart!

"Old fart"!?

You amateur! What's the matter with you!?

If you just try to pick up any old girl. . .

then you're in for a bleak, hapless future!

- Exactly. - No argument here.

Mind yer own business!

Cutie-pie! Marry me!

What're you doing? Stop it!

I'm gonna clean up your dirty mind!

Don' wanna! Lemme alone!

I don't get it. What just happened?

This was my house when I was a girl.

How nostalgic.

That was me as a young girl!

Yeah, how many times have I heard THAT one today?

Think I'm lying? Just watch.

Hey, Cologne!?

Yes?

NO WAY!!

I am your master now! Stand up!

I'm pooped.

You're the worst excuse-- You're gonna wind up a dirty old man!

Who cares!? I'm in my prime right now!

What about it! Youth is a time for sweat and tears!

Don't go wasting it!

W-What!?

Old man, what do you like better: hard training or girls' panties?

Girls' panties!

Would you rather see the hell of practice or a ladies' bathhouse?

The ladies' baths.

Let's take a little break.

Take a long break, you stupid, dirty old man!

Owchie!

Please take time.

May I get warm sake for two gentlemen?

That's a great idea!

We'd thank you for your kindness!

We traveling strangers hate to impose on you.

One look at you, Ma'am, and I sure you no stranger.

That's for sure!

Nothin'.

Cologne-baby!

- Happy, why you here? - Don't be that way.

Stay away!

Cologne-baby--?

You poured tea on me!

That means we suit each other to a "T," right?

The guy's just clueless.

Happy, go home!

Don' wanna! I'm not leaving till you agree to marry me!

Happy!

Don't you listen!?

If explanations aren't enough, we'll beat some sense into you.

You two, again!?

Wanna fight?

Just remember! Bully me now, and I'll bully you back later!

You care about him, don't you?

Please enjoy rice. I go make main course.

All right!

That must be it! She really likes Happy!

- Think so? - Great-Grandma? Is true?

I don't remember. It was so long ago--

I told you so!

I'll be your master and make a man outta you.

So get me seconds!

You ate it all.

What's this?

Pork buns! All right!

I knew it!

I do good thing for Great-Grandma sake!

Now it's time to inventory my collection.

"Collection"?

How sweet!

Hands off! I worked hard to build this up!

Was I doing this, even way back then!?

- Now's the time! - Gimme it back!

- You want it? Then follow me! - That's dirty! You old fart!

I don't have a girlfriend because of your perverted ways!

It's all your fault!

That made no sense!

What's this?

Meet me by Egg Foo Young Lake. Love, Cologne.

It's from Cologne!

I have very important message. Meet me by Egg Foo Young Lake.

Please come. Love, Happy.

Then you go quick.

That's right! Minutes can seem like hours.

I no can go.

Cologne!

I-- I no like Happy.

That's not true! Just be honest with yourself.

Who actually write that letter?

Happy no can write Chinese.

So much for that!

Why are you tryin' to fix them up?

Marryin' Happy is a ticket to eternal misery.

I'm sure Cologne was thinkin' that when she turned him down.

Maybe you're right.

But always have memories!

Woman always treasure memory of love.

- You got it! - Right.

Granny, where ya goin'?

I want to check on a memory--

It's Happy!

Oh, my!

Nihao !

That old fart! He's probably meeting Cologne right now!

Wait. Cologne can't write Japanese--

Hey! Happy's over here!

Oh, no! It's the villagers!

- Did you see Happy? - No, he got away!

But this time he'll pay for all that underwear!

He'll never live through our revenge!

What're you gonna do with that?

This is magic mirror that been in family for generations.

If I sell it, I get enough money--

You're doin' it for Happy? What's so good about that jerk?

You not know Happy's true self!

"His true self"?

The first day I meet Happy--

What wrong!?

Don't mind me. Take care of him!

He was on brink of death, but he only worried about bird!

That when I first see him.

A stuffed bird?

He's just tryin' to get sympathy with that stupid trick.

You wrong!

He train so hard, he no longer know what real and what fake.

Then why're you turnin' him down?

Go ahead and marry him.

He in training.

Marriage just keep him from fate.

Cologne!

Happy!

So that letter WAS a fake!

You're sending me away, just to be alone with this jerk!

Listen!

Let's settle this outside!

What!?

This is stupid!

I feel sick.

No sicker than I feel.

I'll get you!

You're gonna eat Chinese DIRT--

What you do to MY HAPPY!?

Cologne!

Happy!

Cologne!

Happy!

Cologne!

Stay right there!

Cutie-pie!

Cologne, I guess you're the only one left for me!

Help me!!

Damn these villagers! I'm never coming back here again!

Give me back my magic mirror!

Nyah nyah! This is the last this village'll see of me!

Give back my mirror!

I knew that'd happen!

And with my perseverance and hard work, I earned the mirror.

You're awful!

Bad man.

And HE'S our master! Pathetic!

Time to quit being a disciple.

You're inhuman!

How awful! You didn't have to gang up and insult me!

This world is too cruel! I wanna go home!

Stop, you thief!

Don't be stupid! It was always mine!

I worked hard to get that!

Stop it! Stop it!

The old man hasn't learned a thing.

Ranma.

While we were in China, couldn't we have gone to Jusenkyo ?

NO!

Hey, gimme that mirror!

What happen here?

Same as always.

What's everybody doing out here?