Original subtitles

[narrator 2] Brought to you by Mirror World.

Need a mirror? Where are you gonna go? Someplace else?

We're Mirror World.

[? lo-fi electronic music playing]

- [clicks] - [? music concludes]

[yawns]

5:00 a.m., why am I awake?

[footsteps approaching]

What's happening?

[yawns] Good morning.

I'm up at 5:00 a.m., like you asked,

to take you to the salon for your big haircut before school.

Oh, yeah.

I usually get my hair cut on a Friday afternoon, and it always looks hecka fresh.

But come Monday morning, it never looks as good.

But now, thanks to Harriet Trimble

creating this new early-morning hair appointment,

I can finally walk into school rocking my salon-quality cut.

See you in an hour or so!

Maybe 90 minutes! Whoo!

- Beryl time. - [tune playing over phone]

That was quick.

Seven minutes.

The entire haircut took... seven minutes.

She wasn't even looking at me.

Her kids were running around, she was gossiping on the phone,

baking muffins, totally distracted.

You're all set!

I don't think it looks very good.

Mama? Mama!

Look what they did to your only child!

Well, sweetie, I think you look good.

[scoffs]

Did you want to go back in, tell her to fix it?

Oh, I don't want to be that person.

[stammers] Oh, I asked for my eggs over easy

and these are over medium.

And can you send them back and make it the way I wanted?

No.

Let's just go.

Seven minutes? [scoffs]

[? pensive music playing]

[sighs]

[groans]

Maybe if I do this.

[groans] Okay, maybe if I push it all back.

[sighs] No.

Maybe if I did a little swoop.

[sighs] No.

[groans] What did she do to me?

It's not right, Beryl!

Wait, what? What are we doing here?

You're going to school.

Looking like this? With this? On my head?

Mom. Mom! I look crazy!

Kiff, I have to get to work.

That's fine. I'll hang out in the car all day. Let's go.

Kiff.

I guess it's a standoff then.

[laughs]

Everyone knows.

- [laughing] - Look at them. [gasps]

This hat hides nothing.

[slurps]

They can see it. [pants] They can see it in my eyes.

[grunts]

Hi, Kiff!

Oh, is that Beryl's sun hat?

It is. But I can't tell you why I'm wearing it.

Okay, I respect your boundaries.

Keep in mind, this was almost 100 years

before the great rubber boom, so trampoline insurance was,

um, uh, still very affordable.

Kiff, will you please remove your hat?

I can't.

I have a condition.

[grunts] Fine.

[Miss Deer Teacher] That one, too.

Look at them, Barry. Pretending they don't notice.

Almost makes it worse.

What's happening?

Seriously? You too, Barry?

You're not going to acknowledge the elephant in the room?

Do we have a new student? An elephant?

Barry! My new haircut! It looks terrible!

It does?

I see it now!

What are you doing?

Kiff and I have to go to the bathroom!

I've heard of synchronized swimming,

but synchronized tinkling?

Oh, this haircut is a nightmare.

Let's go back and have her fix it.

No.

I'm worried that if I go in there and try to explain, I'm...

I'm not gonna be nice.

[pants] And I don't want to be all hot-headed and mad.

I don't want to yell at anybody.

Sit tight, there's something I gotta do.

Oh, here we go.

[man] Hello.

Is this Cam Lensington, professional photographer?

[Cam] It is, yeah.

Okay, can you help me make my friend feel better about her bad haircut?

[Cam] How?

Um, I was thinking you would, like, "discover her" on the street

and just tell her she has amazing hair.

[Cam] Hmm. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I charge 20 nuts for that.

Okay, hold on.

Hey, Sweepy!

Is 20 nuts a fair price to have a professional participate in a ruse?

- Oh, that's a good deal. - Let's do this.

[bell rings]

Uh, Kiff, sorry, I need something out of my backpack.

[sighs] Okay, be quick.

Wow, what a great haircut you have.

Uh, what?

Uh, oh, sorry, I'm a professional photographer and, uh...

[chuckles] I know a great head of hair when I see one.

Oh, wow.

Really? Me?

Yeah, how about a picture?

I think that hairdo could make the cover of Haircut Quarterly,

which is a magazine, a real one.

Huh.

All right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe it's not so bad.

[whispers] Thank you.

I knew it! It's my horrible haircut!

[cries]

What the heck, Cam?

I don't understand. I...

[laughs] Oh, I see what happened. This is my jokey joke camera.

See? [laughs] It was a gag gift from my wife.

Shame on you and your wife.

[pants]

[cries]

[gasps]

I'm out of options, Bar.

I must return to the salon and ask Harriet to fix...

[grunts] ...this.

[inhales, exhales]

[clears throat] Harriet!

There's something I'd like to discuss with you. [chuckles]

Just a sec, hon.

You got this.

What are you... What are you doin'?

Oh, I do this after work. Go over all my amazing haircuts.

And even though they're all amazing,

I- I always know I can do a little better tomorrow.

That's how dedicated I am to my job.

Are you dedicated to this?

Look at it!

Oh, it's you.

I'm sorry to be yelling. I don't want to be yelling,

but this haircut is ruining my life!

I am so glad you came back because there's something I need to tell you.

Kiff, there never was a haircut.

What?

[gasps] Plot twist!

Ooh, muffins.

I only realized it after you left.

There was no hair on the floor.

I was so distracted during our early morning time slot

that none of my snips ever made contact with your hair.

And look... computer enhance...

I'm not even using scissors.

I'm just using my fingers and making snip-snip noises with my mouth.

Mm, Kiff's hair looks the same. I see it now.

Well, I'll be darned.

I must thank you, Kiff, for showing me that 6:00 a.m.

is too early to give anyone a proper haircut.

You're welcome.

Now...

how about we do this for real?

[? emotional opera music playing]

[? music ends]

Now that's...

what I'm talking about!

[chuckles] Fresh lettuce alert!

You're an artist, Harriet.

[? heroic orchestral music playing]

[? music ends]

[? theme music playing]

[? theme music concludes]

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