All language subtitles for Gilligans Island - 1x25 - The Matchmaker_track3_[eng]

* Just sit right back
and you'll hear a tale *

* A tale of a fateful trip *

* That started from this tropic
port aboard this tiny ship *

* The mate was
a mighty sailin' man *

* The Skipper brave and sure *

* Five passengers
set sail that day *

* For a three hour tour *

* A three hour tour *

[thunder rumbling]

* The weather started
getting rough *

* The tiny ship was tossed *

* If not for the courage
of the fearless crew *

* The Minnow would be lost *

* The Minnow would be lost *

* The ship set ground
on the shore *

* Of this uncharted
desert isle *

* With Gilligan *

* The Skipper too *

* The millionaire *

* And his wife *

* The movie star *

* And the rest *

* Are here on Gilligan's Isle *

[snoring]

Dear, the opening of the opera

the horse show,
two debutant balls.

What the hell are you
talking about?

Oh, nothing, dear.
Go back to sleep.

It's not your fault, anyway.

Ah, ah, ah. Thank you.

What's-what's
not my fault?

Well, that we're sitting
out the entire social season

on this silly little island.

Well, you're actually right.
It's-it's not my fault.

I don't mind missing
the other things.

But, Thurston,
the weddings. Oh!

If there was just something
I could do here

like a charity ball
or a benefit luncheon

or-or making a perfect match.

Chin up, Lovey.

We won't be on this
deary little island forever.

Thurston, Thurston. Can't the
captain of a ship marry people?

Yes, as a matter
of fact he can. Why?

Why didn't I think
about that before?

They're the most perfect match.
A little off beat of course.

But then that's terribly chic
and it's the right season too.

Lovey, what on earth
are you talking about?

Well, the wedding of course.
I have a thousand things to do.

If I'm not asking too much,
whose wedding?

I don't understand, no one here,
but Gilligan and Mary Ann.

Exactly.
Romeo and Juliet.

Nuptials between
Gilligan and Mary Ann.

They're not even aware
of each other's existence.

Of course they are, dear.
Look at them out there.

With some encouragement
they could be madly in love.

Gilligan, you should
have told me. You set that trap?

- I might have broken a leg.
- I'm sorry you fell in.

- Here, let me rub it.
- Oh, no, that's alright.

- What were you trying to catch?
- An anteater.

- An anteater? Whatever for?
- For Ginger, the poor girl.

You mean, she told you
to catch an anteater?

No, the Skipper did.

He said she had ants
in her belfry, whatever that is.

So I tried to help
her get rid of 'em.

I'm sure the Skipper said
bats in her belfry.

Bats?

Where am I gonna
find a bat eater?

I don't even know
what they look like.

Gilligan and Mary Ann
haven't shown

the slightest romantic
inclination towards each other.

Of course not, dear.

If they could manage
on their own

they wouldn't need me,
would they?

Lovey, I want you to stop
this ridiculous plan of action

at once!

Alright, darling,
if you insist

but it would be so easy.

First we get them thinking
about marriage in general.

No!

And then we get them
thinking about each other.

No.

And get them thinking about

the perfect marriage
in the flesh.

- That's us, dear.
- No. I mean, yes, yes, us.

It'd all be so easy. We'll let
nature take its course.

And then I'll work on Mary Ann
and you work on Gilligan.

No! I'll have no part of this

cold blooded, nefarious,
female scheme.

Yes, my boy, man doesn't
start living until

after he is married.

Mr. Howell, that must
have cost a fortune.

Everything I have costs
a fortune, Gilligan, my boy.

Except this camera.
It costs more than a fortune.

It's solid gold, it's custom
made, actually it's priceless.

It's beautiful.

It's true I like the finer
things in life and so could you.

I never could
be a millionaire.

Ha ha, don't sell yourself
short, Gilligan.

Do you think that I was always
healthy, handsome and wealthy?

- Sure.
- No, on the contrary.

When I was a youth, I was pale,
sickly-looking inept

rather like you, my boy.

- You're kidding?
- Yes, I started to go downhill.

And then I met Lovey
and that woman changed me.

She took me and she hammered,
pounded, and molded me.

- That must have hurt.
- It's a figure of speech.

Take the camera.
Take a picture of me

next to this rather
rare plant for my album.

Sure thing, Mr. Howell.

Remember, behind every famous
man there stands a woman.

Look at Napoleon and Josephine.
Look at Caesar and Cleopatra.

Look where you are going,
Gilligan!

Oh, no.

I think I got your picture.

Have you ever seen
a grown man cry?

Frightening sight.

- They'll be awfully pretty.
- Thank you, dear.

Thurston loves
these colorful ascots.

You certainly like to please
him, don't you?

It's all I live for.

To be a good wife is to be
a completely fulfilled woman.

You'll find out yourself
some day. I hope.

I do too, I want
to get married.

Of course,
you do, dear.

Every girl at your age does,
but time goes so fast.

Yes, it does.
Doesn't it?

We could be marooned
on this island for years.

And years and years.

Of course there are eligible
bachelors right here.

For me?
Well, who?

I'm much too young
for the Skipper.

The professor and I have
nothing in common.

Gilligan, well..

Gilligan?
Gilligan, a husband?

Flowers from Gilligan?
Are you sure?

Of course, I was here
when he put them on the bunk.

- And he said they were for me?
- Uh-hm. Don't be so surprised.

After all, you're a girl
and he's..

Well, whatever he is,
he's kind of cute.

Gee, I just..

Imagine he's having a crush on
you and we discovered it now.

It reminds me of a movie
I was in once.

He loved her with
a burning passion.

And she loved him
like a flaming fire.

It was a good movie.

Sounds more like a commercial
for a gas company.

Hi, girls. I wanted to see if
you got the flowers, Mary Ann.

See, I told you. Why didn't
you say something to him?

- I didn't know what to say.
- Just be sweet to him.

I mean he's a shy
frightened fawn.

Just like in the movies.

See you.

Flowers from Gilligan.

Gilligan, I-I just wanna say,
don't be fooled by appearances.

- Okay?
- Okay.

What I mean is

sometimes a person
can't show what they feel.

- Do you know what I mean?
- Nope.

Gilligan, try to understand.

Sometimes a certain girl feels
the same way as certain fellow

feels about her,
but she just can't show it.

Get it?

Oh!

Oh, oh.

I just felt I should
say something.

Oh, I'm glad you didn't.

I'm glad you like me
as much as I like you.

I'll tell you what, don't
you worry about your belfry.

I'll find you that bat eater.

Belfry?

Well, our little buddy here is
becoming quite a social lad.

Yes, how come he gets a special
invitation to the Howells.

Mrs. Howell wanna thank me
for helping her.

She picked flowers and had
me give 'em to Mary Ann.

Had you give them
to Mary Ann?

She wanted to thank Mary Ann
for helping with the sewing.

- Was there a note?
- I don't think. Why?

Well, you left the flowers
for Mary Ann without a note.

She'll think
you gave them to her.

Why would she think that?
She didn't help me with sewing.

Gilligan, your innocence is
exceeded only by your naivety.

You left yourself wide open for
a dilly of misunderstanding.

Many men have been brought
to their knees

by lot less than
flowers. Right?

Oh, right, Professor.

Did you notice the way Mary Ann
kept passing him the toast?

And yesterday it was the coconut
milk. Highly indicative.

I want to tell you
there's no telling

what's playing around
that pretty little head.

What you're trying to put
me on won't work.

Mary Ann doesn't have
a crush on me. Ginger does.

Oh, Gilligan,
come and take this chair.

It's the most
comfortable.

Thank you for
inviting me tonight.

It's the least we could do
for your help this morning.

But I broke your priceless,
solid gold camera.

Yes, you did.

[knock on door]

Oh, there's someone
at the door. Come in.

Oh, Mary Ann.
What a surprise!

- It is? You did ask me over.
- Oh, yes, of course.

Gilligan dropped in too.
Isn't that nice?

- Hi, Gilligan.
- Hi, Mary Ann.

Ah, now isn't this cozy?
Sit right down here.

Thurston, haven't we got some
champagne cooling in the stream.

One of our
last bottles.

Oh, marvelous!
We must get it at once.

Now you two children
sit there and chat.

We'll be right back.

[blowing]

Ah-huh.

Something bothering you,
Mary Ann?

Oh, no. No, Gilligan. I..

Well, I do want to thank you
for the flowers.

Oh, I didn't give you those
flowers, Mrs. Howell did.

Mrs. Howell?

- Ginger said you left them.
- I did, for Mrs. Howell.

Oh, I guess I just..

Oh, I thought maybe..

Oh.

Then you mean that
you and, uh, Ginger was..

The guys were right.

I guess it was a little
misunderstanding, huh?

Yeah, I guess..
Tell you what, Mary Ann.

I'd spend all morning
picking flowers for someone

I-I'd certainly pick
those flowers for someone

as sweet and nice
as you are.

Oh. That's an awfully
sweet thing to say, Gilligan.

Well, it's awfully sweet thing
of you to think that, hm.

I'm not half
as sweet as you.

Well, I'm not..
You are twice as sweet as me.

Heavens, what a conversation.

Things are going
swimmingly.

They're getting sweet on each
other, I'll say that much.

Thurston, let's show them
what real happiness is.

Well, here we are. Will you do
the honors, sweetheart?

Yes, delighted my pet.

Gilligan, could we have a little
light on the subject, please?

Here we are.

I'm gonna tell
you children the secret.

This is sort of a celebration.

Twenty years ago tonight

Mr. Howell proposed to me
and I accepted.

Aw, how beautifully romantic.

Thurston always had
a knack for romance.

He took me to the most
enchanting little restaurant

The Tour d'Argent.

Do you remember, sweetheart?

Well, how could I forget
a prime bid of income property

on West 47th Street.

- It was on 52nd street, dear.
- No, no, dear.

West 47th Street
and we had pate de foie gras.

Uh, Thurston, dear, we were
having pheasant under glass.

His memory isn't quite
what it was.

Yes, well, of course,
what difference does it make?

Anyhow, here's to 20 years
of wedded bliss.

Bad year.

Here's to the most devoted

considerate husband
in the world.

Here, I'll drink to that.

Here's to Lovey
who looks as lovely tonight

as she did 20 years ago.

May I say, 20 years ago
what a vision of loveliness

she was sitting there
in a flaming red dress.

Flaming red dress? I never
had a red dress in my life!

You must have rented it

because that's what
you had on that night.

Thurston, you must be
remembering somebody else.

No. I can see her
in that red dress

sitting there,
clicking her nails.

Clicking my nails?

Yes, it's a nervous habit
she has, clicking her nails.

Oh, shall we make
another toast?

Yeah. Here is to 20 years
of harmony and bliss.

If I click my nails,
it's only to drown

out the noise
of his sniffing.

- I beg your pardon?
- I said, "sniffing."

Twenty years of it!

Well, I hadn't known
it bothered you before.

It doesn't, not nearly
so much as his throat clearing.

We haven't spoke
of that before.

[clearing throat]

Just as I never spoke
of your snoring.

My snoring?

- How dare you say such a thing.
- It took nerve.

Mr. Howell and Mrs. Howell..

Oh, what vulgarity!

But what I can expect of man

who doesn't know
the difference between

his oyster fork
and a shrimp fork?

That's gone far enough.

I won't go any farther

because I shall
never speak to you again.

As long as we have witnesses,
you mind putting it in writing.

- Do something.
- Um, yeah.

Here's to a perfect marriage.

I heard there's a popular saying
for who has had it.

I want you gentlemen
to clear space for me

and I'll list my simple
requirement.

First of all, tea at seven.
Gilligan, you're caddy.

Skipper, I want you to rinse out
and wash that luggage.

That beast of a man can go
where he chooses.

I'm not staying alone.
Be a darling, help me.

I left my hair dryer outside.

Well, here we are,
one big happy family

having our happy midday meal.

Yes, it certainly is
a beautiful day, isn't it?

It's a lovely day.

Don't you think so,
Mrs. Howell?

Might I have
the coconut milk please?

[coughing]

I don't think I could
be heard over the noise

at the far end of the table

'Ginger, would you please pass
the coconut milk?'

Sure.

Gilligan, would you ask
the lady who sits there

clicking like a parking meter
if she's through with the salt?

Your husband for 20 years would
like you to pass the salt.

Tell that gentlemen
with the nasal disturbance

that I have not finished.

Why don't you two
stop this foolishness?

Yes, your disagreement really
has no basis, you know.

What's a few insults when you've
been married for 20 years?

Besides whether they even were
insults is highly debatable.

Are you kidding?
He said that she snored.

You can hardly call that
an insult, could you?

Well, I would.

Don't you think
that's a bit immature?

No, I think it's an insult.

Perhaps that proves
my point.

Well, aren't we
the smart one?

I needn't take
that tone of voice.

Frankly, I don't blame
her a bit.

Excuse me, I'm gonna finish
my meal elsewhere.

All this is because Mr. Howell
can't remember anything?

I can remember everything.

Be quiet, Gilligan.
You're just making things worse.

Don't blame him, after all
it was you who started it.

- Says who?
- Says me.

- Well, say it to yourself.
- I certainly will.

Gilligan, come with me.

I haven't finished.

Gilligan, come with me.

I'm finished.

Gilligan, we've got
a red light emergency

and we've got to nip it
right in the bud, right now.

- Or nobody will be talking.
- Exactly.

How did it all start?

Let's see, the Professor
said to Ginger, "I'd like to--"

No, I mean with the Howells.
How did it start?

Mrs. Howell asked Mr. Howell
for the coconut milk and--

I know this is hard for you

but do you remember
clear back to last night?

- Can you do that?
- I'll do my best.

- Morale of the group is on you.
- Aye aye, sir.

What were the Howells doing
when they started their fight?

They were showing Mary Ann
and me how happy they were.

- No, no, no.
- Yes, yes, yes.

Because they were
celebrating the anniversary

of Mr. Howell's proposal to
Mrs. Howell in the Tour d'Argent

on 47th street.
I remember it all.

Right, she was trying to make
everything so romantic.

That's our answer.

Ginger, have you been to this
place, the Tour d'Argent?

I've been to the Tour d'Argent.
It's very romantic.

Well, then, we will recreate
the place as best we can.

We'll get the Howells there,
in some sort of a pretext.

We'll set them up
with fond memories.

- That should get them together.
- That's a wonderful idea.

- I'll be the entertainer.
- I'll be the chef.

Can I be the bus boy
with a white jacket?

You can be the waiter.

Let's proceed with
operation reconciliation.

Come on.

Well, this is more like it.

One big happy family again.

We'll have a little
run through.

Ginger, would you be
Mrs. Howell?

Yes.

I'll be Mr. Howell.

Ah-h.
Are you ready, Gilligan?

After you, peer.

- What?
- I heard that in a movie once.

Watch this, Skipper.

- Soup, madame?
- Very good, thank you.

Here we go.

- There.
- That's very good, Gilligan.

But there's one thing.
Relax and bow lower.

- Oh.
- Soup, monsieur?

- See you tonight, girls.
- Okay, see you.

Gilligan, Gilligan.

Remember tonight, we're trying
to bring back

romantic memories
for the Howells, right?

Right, Skipper.

And for our plan to work
we've got to make

a perfect duplicate of that
perfect evening 20 years ago.

- Right, Skipper.
- Right.

Now, please don't spill the soup
on the Howells tonight.

You can depend
on me, Skipper.

Thanks, buddy.
Come on.

If you could just come
this way, monsieur.

You might let me in on these
play-acting shenanigans

as long as
you're using my abode.

Thank you.

- Your menu, monsieur.
- Menu?

Oh, what on earth
is going on here?

A-ha, just as I suspected.
Collusion.

A little surprise, Mrs. Howell.
Come here.

We've prepared a very
special dinner for you.

In that case you might
have selected a more

congenial partner for me.

At least she's
sitting with him.

Gilligan.

Good evening and welcome
to the Tour d'Argent.

- Tour d'Argent?
- Just as I thought. Collusion.

And now ladies and gentlemen,
from the Tour d'Argent

in the heart of glamorous
West 47th Street--

West 52nd Street.

We are happy to present
the one and only

the incomparable
mademoiselle, Ginger.

[slow instrumental music]

[singing in French]

- Lovely voice?
- Yes.

Hold my hand,
Thurston, darling.

[continues singing]

[all clapping]

Flowers. Would you like
a corsage for madame, monsieur?

Yes, I would very much.
Here you are, my dear.

- Keep the change.
- Merci.

So, there you are, my darling.

Oh, Thurston, for me?

Well, the little thing
has to make a living.

Darling, you're always
so generous.

They're smiling.
When do I get my turn?

Right away, Gilligan.

Little alcohol on these
turtle tit bits and presto..

...flaming hors d'oeuvres.

- Howells are gonna eat these?
- Of course.

No wonder they made good.
Nothing scares them.

Gilligan, you put the fire out
before you serve them.

- Gilligan--
- Don't worry, I'll be careful.

Thank you.

Here you are.
Nice flaming hors d'oeuvres.

Gilligan, what are you doing?

Oh, Gilligan.
Allow me, madame.

Show off.

Yes.

Now comes your moment
of truth, little buddy.

Be of good cheer, Skipper.

I will not spill
the soup on the Howells.

And now ladies and gentlemen
for her second number

Ginger will present a dance
she created in her film

"The Hula Girl
and the Fullback."

[Hawaiian music]

No!

[music stops]

Why me, Professor,
always me?

I wish some other couple could
know the joys of wedded bliss.

Oh, no, no. Not again.

- Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Howell.
- Lovely day, isn't it?

- Thank heavens.
- I wasn't talking about them.

Oh, good grief.

Marvelous combination
and it's the right season too.

- Oh, Ginger, Professor.
- Lovey, Lovey, we can't.

Ah, no, not again.
Not again.

Lovey, baby.

* Now, this is the tale
of the castaways *

* They're here for
a long, long time *

* They'll have to make
the best of things *

* It's an uphill climb *

* The first mate
and his Skipper too *

* Will do their very best *

* To make the others
comfortable *

* In the tropic island nest *

* No phone, no lights,
no motorcars *

* Not a single luxury *

* Like Robinson Crusoe *

* Its primitive as can be *

* So join us here
each week my friends *

You're sure to get a smile *

* From seven stranded
castaways *

* Here on Gilligan's isle *