All language subtitles for The Sopranos - S05E10 - Cold Cuts.eng.SDH

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

Fuck this. I'm calling Carlo.

[DIALING]

Yeah, they didn't show.
The Vespa scooters.

We gotta wait.

TONY: Carlo was furious.

His guys waited by the
Hackensack River all fucking night.

Fucking Vespas never got into my hands.

This is Port Newark.

Where were your longshoremen?

There's heightened security
at the ports. Al-Qaeda.

Done, Johnny.

I gotta go.

JOHN: Nice job, Billy boy.

Carlo was told it was a go. If it didn't
happen, how come nobody called?

A lot of things didn't happen
that seem like they happened.

Your cousin didn't whack Joey.

The Vespas never got into my hands.

-Eye on the ball, Keaton! Hustle!
-Come on. Go, Soph!

Hey, Soph is open! She's open!

-Over here!
-She's gotta be at least 11.

Don't put up with that, Lissie!

Careful with those elbows, number seven!

Hey, out of bounds! Out of bounds!

Lissie, go!

-They're just a bunch of losers!
-Hey, no negatives, you.

Come on, Putts, charge
the ball! Charge it!

Ah!

Foul! That kid tripped my kid.

That's legal. She was going for the ball.

-She was not.
-Score! Score! Come on!

Your kid is out of control. She's
been tripping and pushing all summer.

Oh, shut up and get out of here.

Don't tell me to shut up.

What are you, crazy?

-Please, come on. Somebody!
-[WHISTLE BLOWS]

-How do you like it now, bitch?
-Help!

No, her kid kicked my kid. Get off!

[MOANS]

-Cost you a hundred.
-Call.

Sit down. Sit, sit.

I talked to John.

The Vespa scooters came in.

But there was no opportunity to grab
them because of security at the ports.

Jesus Christ. The young
crowd is crazy for these scooters.

He owes me half that fucking load.

-You're not buying it?
-I don't know what to think.

He's getting awfully
cute with his remarks.

All I know is his behavior at
that kid's funeral was a disgrace.

It's a big part of my
livelihood, the port.

I will say, very interesting timing, T.

You and John had that
little chat at the funeral

whatever that was.

Suddenly, no Vespas.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

All right, I gotta take this.

Take one of Carlo's guys. Start
hanging around down Port Newark.

Find out what the fuck is going on.

The property taxes, I know.

Hello to you too.

I thought you should know
your sister, Janice, got arrested.

-What?
-In Essex County this afternoon

an incident of sports
rage among soccer moms

led to the arrest of a Verona
woman with ties to the Mafia.

Our Gillian Glessner was on
the scene. What about it, Gillian?

Think that other mother better go into
the soccer-mom protection program?

GILLIAN: Maybe she should, Carl.

It started here at Summit Avenue Park…

Club soccer match.

An altercation between soccer moms

that sent one mother to
the hospital and one to jail.

Denise McCarthy, a parent,
witnessed the violence.

I just feel so bad for the kids.

Parents taping the
match captured the melee.

-Come on! Somebody!
-How do you like it now, bitch?

Her kid kicked my kid.

Charges are still pending but

we know that the woman shown
here being taken into custody

is Janice Baccalieri, sister of reputed
New Jersey mob boss, Anthony Soprano.

Guess you could call
it a Mafia-related hit.

We spoke with psychologist Bela Kakuk.

It's a growing problem in our society.

Psychologists are finding that certain

individuals are
particularly prone to rage.

Almost any frustration, inconvenience,

or perceived inconsideration
will set them off.

Motherfucker!

Janice, open the door!

-Where is she?
-It wasn't my fault!

My name was all over the TV

because of your bullshit!

It's not that simple, Ton.

Apparently, the woman's
kid was picking on Sophia.

Why wasn't she collared?

I am suing the township
for wrongful arrest…

-No, you're not!
-And the YSO.

No, no, you're not!

What you're gonna do is call
Neil. You're gonna plea it down.

You're gonna pay the fine and not
turn this into one of your cause célèbres.

Anybody's side but mine.

That bitch is lucky I didn't kill her.

Well, we know that.

What?

-You and your fucking temper, Janice.
-Get out.

This is the end of it.

Get out!

Tony.

I know this looks bad.

But on the other hand, she
called Sophia her daughter.

I don't give a fuck.

All right, I do give a fuck.

But how many times I gotta
tell you, get control of your wife!

-[KNOCKING]
-JANICE: Sophia?

[KNOCKS AGAIN]

Sophia?

I'm so embarrassed.

I don't wanna see
any of my friends again.

Well, when you're a parent, you'll see.

You'll defend your children
like a lion with her cubs.

You're not my parent.

What did you say?

I'm here.

And I try to care very much.

-Now, get to sleep.
-You gonna punch me?

Jan? Can I talk to you?

Sophia, go to sleep.

We'll talk tomorrow. I'm exhausted.

No, now.

What, I don't have a say in things?

Janice, I think you
need professional help.

Oh, I'll be having an extra
session with Sandy, believe me.

Sandy, Sandy. What does she do?

She says you were picked on by your
father and asks you to read screenplays.

I think there's anger specialists.

And I think you should
see a weight-loss specialist.

You don't see it in yourself.

I heard you with Sophia.

You were getting along much better.

She says one little
thing, and you get nasty.

I'm so sore.

This is not an isolated incident.

They won't let you shop
up at the corner anymore.

Those coffee beans were
burnt, Bobby. You tasted them.

Janice, I like a
spitfire type. I told you.

-But me and the kids can't live like this.
-Like what?

This was a nice house.

Peaceful. I don't know.

There wasn't all this
yelling and tension.

How could you understand?

Your dad was a sweetheart

even when he had emphysema.

My house, it was dog-eat-dog.

Well, be that as it may, the past and all

if you don't go to these anger
classes they have or whatever

this with us ain't gonna work out.

[PEOPLE CHATTER AS CHIPS FALL]

What do you think he clears here?

Two crap tables, blackjack, roulette.

You gotta figure he's grabbing anywhere
from 2500 to 5 G's a night for himself.

It used to be you, didn't it?

Teacher's pet. [LAUGHS]

-Stop making meatballs, Paulie.
-I'm just saying.

Now you know what I went through.

Okay, it's the same
Gina had at her wedding.

We should see how it looks on your face.

-Chrissy.
-[HORN HONKS]

[HONKING CONTINUES]

What the fuck?

-What's up?
-Hey there, cos.

Guess who called me today.

-How'd you find me?
-Not gonna guess?

-Okay, who?
-Our friend with the orchard.

-No shit. He okay?
-Yeah.

-Sold the place. Moving to Florida.
-He should. Getting on in years.

-Oh, shit.
-You still got your canned peaches there.

I just had the car serviced.
Watch what you say.

I gotta move that shit?

-Again?
-That developer's going up there.

Obviously, it wouldn't be
good for you or our friend

if somebody opened the canned fruit.

So you and your cousin are
going there to take care of it.

-I'll do it.
-I'm worried about the old guy.

I told you, I'll do it.

The thing is, my old man's
got a few jars up there also.

Could make problems for my uncle.

It's gonna be a lot of work

which, with Louise around,
can only be done at night.

-That's true.
-This has to be done

in two weeks, the latest.

Bulldozers are coming.

What, you picking out wedding cakes?

-Yeah.
-Hope you have better luck than I did.

Why, you didn't like your cake?

Your luck's been fucking great
and listen to you cursing it out.

Got something you wanna say?

-All right.
-So call me.

Well, who is this Uncle Pat anyway?

He was a knock-around
guy like Tony's dad.

But they let him retire to
this farm Upstate New York.

Sounds funny but it wasn't.

He had the hiccups for, like, a year.

-Jeez.
-Great guy.

Had a daughter but
she lived with her mom.

Us boys each got sent up there
summers when we hit 12 or 13.

He'd school us.

Did he have the hiccups?

No, I told you, that went away.

What, you think it's fucking funny?

He almost committed
suicide because of it.

How would you like it?

Where's my Barneys underpants
with the ventilated cotton?

Still in the dryer.

Tell you one thing.

I need fucking Tony B. up
there like I need a third nut.

God, all this resentment.
He is your cousin.

Yeah? Should have
seen him when I was little.

Him and Tony both.

How they broke my balls

teased me.

One time, I was spending the summer

up at Uncle Pat's farm,
just like they used to. I was 11.

They came up… They were, like, 19.
…to shoot guns.

They didn't take me with them.

When I tramped through
the stickers and found them

they said I had to
be initiated into a club

by being tied to a tree alone
in the orchard for an hour.

I was on that tree until
3:00 in the fucking morning.

I worshipped these two guys.

Tony Soprano, especially.

When he was by himself, he
used to push me on my Big Wheels

he'd teach me curse words.

When he was by himself.

Where's the Tinactin?

Right on the night table.

And here we are again.

Tony B. goes wrong, and Tony
lays a 200-K-a-year cash cow on him.

Christopher, don't get mad, okay?

I know we kind of touched on it a
couple of times but… You're so unhappy.

What if we left here?

Went far away.

And you went into something else.

-Like what?
-I don't know, like…

Pick up your writing, maybe.

Male modeling.

I'll get back to the writing someday,

but from a position of great wealth.

Far as male modeling,
I'd probably be a success,

but I wouldn't want to be
around those fucking people.

I'm a soldier, Adriana.

When you gonna understand that?

What the fuck!

Carmela.

-What?
-There's no water in the pool.

Yeah, I had it drained. The
electricity costs a fortune.

I can't afford it. You're
the only one who uses it.

I thought we were getting along better.

So you polluted all the decent lawyers in
New Jersey so they can't represent me?

-You couldn't play fair.
-I'm not the one that wanted it!

Okay, so let's just pretend

that you weren't begging
for it in millions of ways

because I am worn out here.

[DOOR OPENS AND SHUTS]

Fucking…

He's a nice kid, Finn.

Right?

Right.

We gonna throw them an engagement party?

Well, if we can be civil.

She's so young.

Same age we were.

It wasn't all bad.

Last time, I asked you to jot
down one or two situations,

or people that trigger your anger.

So much that when you think
about it, you get angry all over again.

Anybody got…?

Let's give Bradley a chance this time.

My partner parked me in
again. I couldn't find the keys.

-I woke him up, and he starts yelling.
-Describe the feelings.

-I think…
-My stepkids do that all the time.

They leave their bikes in the garage,

and if I wanna pull in, I gotta
get out and move the bikes

with a car of groceries.

[YELLING] Doris, can't you keep
Billy's bike out of the driveway?

It was a famous commercial from the '60s.

Bufferin.

Guy has a headache, and
he takes it out on his wife.

Back to Bradley

I'm trying to get into his actual
physical sensations of anger.

He saw red. Who wouldn't?

She's right. I mean, why is he in here?

Why isn't his roommate in
therapy for selfishness issues?

There are things that are irritating
and annoying and out of our control.

What we can control is our
response to those triggers.

So people just get a free
pass? The whole world?

I told you about my supervisor
checking my work and nobody else's.

-I wonder why.
-Because you're a minority.

-Exactly. That's why I'm in here.
-JANICE: Uh huh.

-You seem angry about Evelyn's problem.
-It makes me mad.

It doesn't make you
mad. You make you mad.

I come from a biased
family, but I was different.

I put all my faith and my hopes

into the civil rights movement.
I left home, and I marched.

And for what?

So they could ride around in
their SUVs, blasting that rap shit?

And you can't say anything
because they might have guns?

Wait a fucking minute. Who's "they"?

If the shoe fits…

This is fucking priceless.

Okay, let's not time travel here.
Let's try to stay in the present.

Janice, you're angry.
Let's stay with that.

What are your actual
physical feelings right now?

I'd like to punch you in the face.

Your hands are clenched.

Did you realize that?

You're provoking me to make a point and

maybe that's your
job, but I don't like it.

Look at you. You're not even listening.

-Hello, he's talking to me.
-EVELYN: No.

You and me, we do
most of the talking in here.

The man is trying to say that those
people outside, they do the thing,

but we're the ones that get upset and
start carrying on. That's all he's saying.

The Hudson Valley.

That Legend of Sleepy Hollow cartoon.

Scared the piss out of me as a kid.

Would you mind watching your shoe?

Oh, sure.

It's a $50,000 vehicle. I
don't want it scuffed up.

Uncle Pat's farm.

When you're 12, 13, man,
it's like fucking heaven, right?

Running around in the woods.

Driving that tractor.

He made me clear the brush by the
fence with a fucking scythe, though.

Yeah, I had to do that. Tony too.

And water his fucking tomatoes
and his [SPEAKING ITALIAN]

Changed, though, you know, Pat's.

After Louise came back there to live

it wasn't just you
and Pat and his stories.

They used to call me Ichabod Crane.

-Who?
-Some very sorry people, that's who.

The Carmela front.

Did you two ever discuss
that evening you made love?

It was a one-time deal.

-I've moved on.
-What about the depression?

Your revelation about your cousin

his prison sentence.

You were very upset.

I haven't had a lot of
time to think about that.

My sister.

She attacked some woman

-at her stepkid's soccer game.
-You've mentioned her temper before.

She got charged with
aggravated assault and

-resisting arrest.
-Excellent.

Let's talk about that.

-What?
-Rage.

-Why?
-Depression is rage turned inward.

Tell me about the Soprano temper.

Well, the thing is,
it's bad for business.

Clouds your judgment.

John, he always had a terrible temper.

-John…?
-Gotti.

In the end, I think it hurt him.

See, we forget that in the old
days, the ones that came over

that started this thing

they didn't get mad.

They just smiled and nodded
and made sure you got it later.

That's the whole, beautiful
point. You know what they say:

"Revenge is like serving cold cuts."

Yeah, I think it's, "Revenge
is a dish best served cold."

-So, what did I say?
-But why revenge all the time?

Where does it come from, this insatiable
anger you and your sister share?

I wondered how long it'd
take for her to come up.

Your mother? What about your father?

You never saw her
chop off someone's finger.

Told you about that, didn't I?

Yes.

-Oh, Jesus, I wish I hadn't.
-Why?

I dress up nice and
everything when I come here.

Okay, let's stick to the subject.

-Which is what?
-Your own intolerance for frustration.

"Thank you for holding.

Your call is important to us."

If it's so important to you,
answer the fucking phone!

Stay with that.

It's a level of bullshit,
bullshit, bullshit!

Each idea they come up with that's
supposed to make things better

-makes things worse.
-Okay, right. I agree.

"The center cannot hold."

-"The falcon cannot hear the falconer."
-What the fuck are you talking about?

We live in a time of
technological and spiritual crisis.

But you feel you're above all of it.

Certainly above any
inconvenience or annoyance.

And if things don't go your way

instead of being merely disappointed
or inconvenienced, you blow.

My sister's…

She's taking anger management classes.

You know, maybe she's on the right track.

Is this something you'd consider?

No.

Well, but I'll admit, it's not good
for me, all this fucking agitation.

Wears me out.

Fucking exhausted all the time.

Where did we start off?

I don't know.

Depression is rage turned inward.

Yeah, yeah.

[CRICKETS CHIRPING]

This is nice.

For inner city kids like
me, this was important.

Inner city? You lived by the
largest shopping mall in Jersey.

It's over now. She's sticking
me in that home in Florida,

and that's the last I'll ever see of her.

I'll be right down the road, Pop.

I got a beautiful condo.

Thinks she's gonna meet
some old, lonely widower.

Louise, it's time for dessert.

I'm getting it.

And do me a favor.

Be as polite as you are
when it's just the two of us.

We know where Chrissy buried
the guy. But with Uncle Johnny's

you gotta help us out.

Well

I'm not exactly sure,

but there was two of them.

The Johnson brothers.

You don't remember where?

It was a long time ago.

TONY B: We can't excavate
the whole fucking place.

Because you know what Tony's gonna say.

Let him come up here and dig then.

Please. He's a heart
attack waiting to happen.

That's no joke.

Our bodies are 86 percent water.

His last blood test, he
was 65 percent zeppole.

When he heard the term "pie in the sky,"
he volunteered for the 82nd Airborne.

That's pretty good.

I learned in recovery that he's just
tamping down his feelings, T, by eating.

I should talk to him.

It's a shame, because he
used to be the funnest guy.

When was that?

He's got the world by the balls and
acts like everything's a big imposition.

Being at the top, he's isolated himself.

Yeah, it's just him and his money.

Hello.

-Who is this guy, anyway?
-My first.

Czechoslovakian guy.

This is the second time I'm moving him.

[GROANS]

-Come here, you little fuck.
-Guys, wait…

-Come here, you little fuck.
-It wasn't me…

Help! Please, don't kill me.

What the fuck are you running for?

The night of the 12th,
there was a ship from Italy

with these containers
of Vespa motor scooters.

I don't know anything
about any fucking Vespas!

We know they got here.
What happened to them?

I don't know. I wasn't here.

Well, apparently he says he wasn't here.

Who picked up

our motherfucking, cocksucking Vespas?

In two seconds

this is going up your ass.

It was the guys from New York.

Phil Leotardo and them.

Listen

thanks for doing this.

-You didn't have to.
-Fuck that. You're my little cousin.

Think I can imagine what
you may be hearing about me.

And what happened in New York.

-All I can say is, there's no truth to it.
-I didn't think nothing.

As for Tony putting me in at the casino,
I knew people were gonna resent that.

But I went away for a long
time. Stood up for this family.

And you, or anybody,
can think what they like,

-but I feel I had a little coming to me.
-Hey, absolutely.

I was telling Benny the other
day. He was complaining.

And what I said about Tony before?
You know I love him like a brother.

I love him too.

We saw the guy down the
pier. John has the Vespas.

And to think of how
supportive you were of him.

-The whole little Carmine fiasco.
-It's fucking payback.

Johnny has it in his head that my cousin
had something to do with Joey Peeps.

Johnny should be out
looking for the real killers

instead of spending his
time on that golf course.

A whole fucking shipment of
cheese coming in next month.

The imported provolone.

I guess we can kiss that
goodbye too now, right?

Motherfucker!

Carmela, hi. What are you doing here?

My son is a senior here now. We were
electing party chairs for senior night.

Oh, right.

So how are you?

-Fine.
-You were pretty upset when you left,

and I wanted to call.

I began to rue what happened,
and I was probably a little…

I'm going back with my husband.

Oh, well, that's good.

Well, all the best.

[BIRD AND INSECT NOISES]

You don't drink no more?

Clean and sober 14 months.

Yeah, your mother has that problem.

Good for you.

That's right.

What?

The Johnson brothers' bodies.

I know where they are.

Over by the fence in the northwest corner

because that night I
noticed one of my pickers

had stuck a Swiss Colony bottle
upside down on one of the fence posts.

I was goddamn mad they were
drinking on the job, I'll tell you.

It's still there, the glass bottle.

-Are you fucking sure?
-Lunch!

-Look what I got for you.
-Thank you.

-Sandwich?
-Oh, very good.

-Here, Pop.
-Oh, thank you.

-Beautiful.
-For you.

This is mail from three
fucking weeks ago.

The girl didn't even show up today.

Call the service and get somebody new.

Two classes, she's telling
people how to run their life.

Don't let it stop you from
taking your kids to the rink.

[DOG BARKS OUTSIDE]

You have every right to be mad at me,

and I apologize.

I know it's bad for the
family. For… For business.

But I'm working on it.

Yeah, I know. Bobby told me.

-So how's that going?
-Anger management?

It's the best thing that
ever happened to me.

It's such a relief to let
go of all that shit. And

I never realized what an
angry person I was and

how it fed itself.

So they got you on tranquilizers?

No.

Basically

it's taking responsibility
for your anger,

and, you know, learning to
recognize your feelings of anger,

and that they're just feelings.
You don't have to act on them.

People want that so
they can walk all over you.

A lot of anger is self-importance.

-Self-importance?
-Problems with authority.

Dr. Seepman locks the door promptly at seven.

People wig out if they don't get in.

Start banging on the
door. It's a big lesson.

I was making everybody
in my life miserable.

Yelling and screaming or
pouting and feeling victimized,

but I feel so much better
now. About everything.

It's like this great
sadness is beginning to lift.

-Sadness?
-Yeah.

Well, I'm happy for you.

Thank you.

I am.

[POLICE SIREN]

LOUISE: Your bid, Chrissy.

You expecting someone?

There he is.

My God, I don't believe it.

Who's that, Anthony?

What's the matter? You all right?

God, you're big.

Look at those shoulders.

-Jan sends her love. And Bob too.
-Did you eat?

Louise, don't ask him. He's a guest.

Just go get him a plate.

Sit down.

You look good.

Feel good.

So how we doing?

Took care of mine last night. The
Johnson brothers, we'll get tonight.

Uncle Pat was like Johnny
Mnemonic. Right, Uncle Pat?

We're playing pinochle. Take a hand.

-This is the life, huh?
-I'm with you.

Yeah, we were just saying that.

Here's to a job well done.

This place hasn't changed much, huh?

Met some pretty nice college
girls the other night, huh, Ton?

She liked you. Miss Raven-Hair.

-Pat seems good, huh?
-Yeah.

Louise seems fat.

The human body is 86 percent water.

But Louise's last blood test,
she was 65 percent zeppole.

That's a good one.

I knew a guy. When he was
gonna eat Philly cheese steak

the mayor of Philly would have
to call out the National Guard.

What the fuck's so funny about that?

Doesn't even make sense.

Well, he's drunk.

Him? No way.

He's in recovery.

Well, if you recover your
fucking balls, give us a call.

We might like to hang out.

No, seriously, it's not funny.
He's… He's a 12-stepper. Right?

Well, yeah. You know that. That's right.

Maybe he could take a couple of steps
out the door so we could have some fun.

Come on, don't get pissy now.
He's just having a joke. That's all.

Sobriety's hard enough work
without having to get mocked for it.

Oh, Jesus Christ. Why don't
you have a fucking drink?

Because you're driving
everybody crazy with this shit.

The fucking higher power
yammering and the sweets,

and the key lime pie and the… Jesus.

Order a fucking bull shot,
will you? Do me a favor.

I'm sorry. I…

-Didn't realize I was being a jerk off.
-No, no.

-No, no, no.
-Look, it's just, you know, come on.

Hey, you're doing the right thing.

You're doing the right thing.

Do you like his car? Schwarzenegger's.
Pretty fucking great, huh?

Oh, yeah, the Humvee,
yeah. Yeah, it's nice.

Kind of steep, though.

You told me you didn't pay.
You gave the guy a hum job.

For the Humvee.

-Maybe he'd like to hum me.
-Who, a friend of Bill over here?

-Fucking wits over here.
-Bill? I'll say.

That? That's not a bill, that's a beak.

You know

that was you he made that
joke about the zeppole content.

On the way home, we can
drop him off at Beakskill.

Well, if beaks could kill,
that one certainly would.

You know, I could have
called you Ichabod Crane.

But I didn't.

What the fuck's he talking
about? Ichabod Crane?

Nothing.

Well, here's to the Johnson brothers

whoever the fuck they were.

-Johnson brothers.
-Johnson brothers.

…back pain? Is your pain…

…carrying case and are ergonomically…

…Port Newark in New Jersey

-…ninety-five…
-…but one example.

Six million containers
enter US ports every year,

yet fewer than two percent of them
are opened and inspected by US Customs.

It is physically impossible to check
every container without essentially

stopping global commerce.

But what keeps officials from
sleeping at night they say

is terrorists could use
shipping containers

to smuggle in a weapon
of mass destruction.

It is within capabilities of
lslamic fundamentalists

to track a container with a
global positioning system,

and detonate a nuclear or
biological weapon hidden inside.

-Son of a bitch.
-In fact a terrorist could even use

a shipping container to
smuggle himself into the country.

There he is.

What I saw on TV last night

the ports are wide open.
Government's not doing shit.

-Louise, where's my butter substitute?
-LOUISE: Right in front of you.

You hear what I just
said? I knew it was bad,

but do you realize
there's 7 million containers?

The news team put
radioactive shit in one of them.

-Wasn't even detected.
-Please, my ears.

Sit down. Sit. Come on.

I made eggs.

Could have been a goddamn A-bomb.

-LOUISE: You want coffee?
-TONY: Yeah.

Fucking terrible nightmares.

Yeah, it knocked the edge
right the hell off your appetite.

-What's the matter with you?
-No, it is some scary shit.

Not my problem much longer.

Speaking of scary shit, was that
you in the bathroom this morning?

Oh, yeah. I thought they already
dropped a biological weapon.

All right, I gotta go.

I thought we were
gonna do a little hunting.

-You hear the turkeys this morning?
-No, I gotta take off.

Uncle Pat, take care of yourself.

Be careful of the alligators down there.

All right, tough guy.

[CLUB MUSIC PLAYS]

Hey, Ton. What'd you do?
Knock over a roadside stand?

My uncle's farm.

Less than a hundred miles from here.

It's like a whole different world.

The bullshit really falls away up there.

Hear about that shit with the ports?

I know customs agents are bad for us,
but anti-terrorism-wise, they do nothing.

What's it gonna take?
A fucking nuclear bomb?

They caught one of these Al-Qaeda
cocksuckers trying to sneak in here.

-Thank God they got him.
-There's enough they don't catch.

You gotta realize the
administration's busy, though, too.

Handing out non-competitive
building contracts to their friends.

Hell, we can all understand that.

We're fucking sitting ducks here.
The only thing between our homes,

and Port Newark is a chain-link fence.

There's a nuclear bomb in a
container and we're fucking dead.

That's why you gotta live for today.

-What'd you say?
-That's why you gotta live for today.

Talking about
annihilation, you stupid fuck!

Your kids! My kids! Burning into cinders!

I can't even think about it.

You stupid…

Can't even fucking think about it.

Think about it now.

Thinking about it now?

-Right now?
-Hey, Tony.

Yeah, yeah, take it easy.
Take it easy. Take a walk.

[GROANS]

-Get some air.
-Take it easy.

-Take a walk outside.
-Take it easy.

All right, everybody.

-Take it easy. Take it easy.
-Come on.

[KNOCKING AT DOOR]

-I wake you up?
-Yeah.

I just come from the hospital.
You said you wanted to know.

Oh, how's he doing?

-Hey.
-Hey.

-Sorry.
-It's all right.

Doctor has a peel at 1.

-Hi.
-How you doing, hon?

-Call me?
-Yeah.

Bye.

-See you later.
-That the dermatology nurse?

-Yeah.
-Nice looking.

Well, they get the best
skin treatments half-price.

So, what'd they say? He's
gonna be okay, the kid?

He's big, strapping. He'll be all right.

But he's got some hearing loss in one
ear. Looks like it could be permanent.

Skip, the poor fuck knows
he should keep his mouth shut.

Go over there.

You make sure he gets the best.

Thing is, Ton, he's quitting the Bing.

And he told Sil, "And I'd appreciate
it if Tony don't come visit me."

He don't wanna see you.

I told him, watch his mouth.

These things happen, T. That's
why I don't like to talk politics.

-You did?
-Please, I couldn't believe it myself.

-Well, are you going back with Tony?
-No.

-Then why'd you say it?
-I don't know, it just came out.

Asshole. He was gonna call me.

-Did he?
-Jerk.

Come in.

Hi.

Uncle Pat.

-Where's A.J.?
-He's not coming.

You lose them to their friends
for a bit but he'll be back.

-Hi, Uncle Ton.
-Hey.

Soph?

-Before dinner?
-Half?

-Thank you.
-Mahatma Gandhi over here. Nice.

-Hey, Tony.
-Hey.

-I thought I heard your voice.
-Hello?

-Good game on later.
-Yeah?

I think we're on the "Do Not Call" list.

No, no, we're happy with our service.

Are those telemarketers?
Just hang up. Hang up!

We're just sitting down to dinner.
Okay. Please don't call again.

Thank you, thank you.

Bobby, Soph, come on.

It's a G5. It's got a
64-bit architecture.

They speak a different
language with computers.

I saw a show on computers, how
the prices have dropped so low

that you can buy one for $500
at Costco, that's more powerful

than the one that they used to
put the astronauts on the moon.

Good eggplant, Jan.

Yeah, delicious.

Wonder where Harpo's
eating his Sunday dinner?

What?

-Just wondering what Harpo's up to.
-Who's Harpo?

That's Hal, Janice's son.

-You have a son?
-You didn't tell us that.

You know that song, "Harpo's
Song" by Phoebe Snow?

Because that's the song
you named Harpo after, right?

He's half French-Canadian, Harpo.

All right, Tony, make fun of
a boy because of his name.

I wonder what's French-Canadian
for "I grew up without a mother"?

[FRENCH ACCENT]
Sacrebleu, where is me mama?

Son of a bitch. You
fucking son of a bitch!

-Come on!
-Daddy!

-Daddy!
-You miserable fuck!

I don't got a right to
ask? I'm the boy's uncle.

Easy, sweetie, easy.

Easy, sweetie, easy.

Hate him. I hate him…