All language subtitles for The Chosen S04E07 The Last Sign 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DD 5 1 H 264-playWEB_track3_eng

Drop the stick.

Who are you?
How did you find this place?

Matthew.

For heaven's sake, why the hood?

Well, you can
never be too sure.

You should have sent word
so we would be prepared.

I thought the point was people
weren't supposed to find out.

Zee has people
who sneak letters in and out.

You know that.

Etienna, who is it? What's happening?

An impromptu guest, my lady.

Mary.

Matthew.

I hope this isn't

an inconvenient time.Oh, no.

Still unusually pleasant
to look at.

I see your eyesight
is starting to go.

All right. Inside, both of you.
It's getting cold.

The others will never forgive me
if I let you catch your death.

Come.

Careful. It's very dark.

Watch where you step.

I can't believe
you came all this way, Matthew.

With the danger.

And at your age.Our age.

It was important.

Mm-hm.

Mary, I finished it.Hm?

The book?

I couldn't risk
sending it by courier.

And I wanted you to be the first
one to read it. Please.

And I want
to hear your thoughts.

I had to be here for it.

I can't believe it.

Oh...

You worked so hard
and for so long.

This will be a treasure
for all time.

I'm here to see about that.Hmm.

It will outlive us.
We know that much.

I know I'm right.

Over by the fire, you two.
We've got to warm you up.

Ah, yes.

Thank you.Welcome.

Thank you.

Mary.

Before we say anything further,

I'm afraid
I have some bad news.

I've gotten used to that.

This I could have sent word of,

but I thought since
I was coming here to see you,

I would tell you in person.

Who is it?

Little James.

How did it happen? Where?

Mary, you--No, I want to know.

I can handle it. Tell me.

Lower Egypt.

King Hyrcanus had him
run through with a spear.

What about Onya and the girls?

Mercifully, they were
not there to see it.

Oh, thanks be to God.Zee's men are moving them

to stay with Nympha
and her husband at Colossae.

Paul's been sending letters
to the church there.

They should be safe there.

I'll send a letter to Onya.

What would you say to her?

He's not suffering anymore.

He was in pain
his entire life...

and he so rarely complained.

Yes.

Here.Thank you, Etienna.

Delicious.

I'm going to stay up all night
and read your manuscript.

I want to relive it all.

Even the hard parts.

Is something wrong?

That is why you came, isn't it?

No. It is.

It's just, um,
something I noticed.

My desk?

I write letters there.

I apologize.

I don't mean to pry.

I just noticed as I passed by,

those scraps
don't look like letters.

You read them?

No. No, no, no,
Mary I would never.

I just...

The pieces sitting there
struck me as odd.

Matthew, let me
read your volume.

Don't busy yourself
with my scribblings.

I'm sure they're more
substantial than scribblings.

Why are we talking about this?Parchment is expensive.

You live in a cave
on a mountainside

far from merchants
or civilization.

No one in your position
or mine wastes paper.

It's true. I'm not wasteful.

Mary, I value your thoughts
and I am eager to hear them all.

Will you allow me?

Oh. It's fine.

You know I'm here for you,
now and always.

I've been having dreams lately.

About some of the darker times.

In my life and His...

and others among us.

I wanted to write them down
so I don't forget.

I'm trying to...

assemble them into something.

I don't know.
Just-- Just for me.

No one else.I understand.

I'm sorry to have pried.

I would only want you to share

if you felt
comfortable sharing, hm?

Perhaps I can share them
with you.

My oldest friend.

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Oh, child, come on in ♪

♪ Jump in the water ♪

♪ Got no trouble
With the mess you been ♪

♪ You walk on the water ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ You walk on the water ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ You walk on the water ♪

♪ Oh, child ♪

♪ You walk on the water ♪

♪ Got no trouble ♪

♪ You walk on the water ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ You walk on the water ♪

Oh, thank you.

Maybe just this other arm.
There.

This is heavy. Leave some.JAMES: A little bit.

I took some stuff out.
It's okay.

Okay.Okay, okay, okay.

Okay.

Okay, there.Ah, thank you.

Here you go.Thank you, Zee. Mm.

James. I made this for you.
For the journey today.

Will be stronger
than the one you had before.

You fought bravely yesterday
when they came to arrest Him.

Didn't even hesitate.

We were never going
to let that happen.

Mmm.

What about me?
Do I get a walking stick?

Are you badly injured?

Just joking.This isn't a day for jokes.

It remains to be seen.

We'll either sit shiva
or we won't.

Is everyone
checked out of their rooms?

Yes.

Judas, you paid the innkeeper?

Yes, Rabbi.

We're ready, master.Mmm.

All right.
Let's not waste any more time.

Please.

I was thinking
about what you said.

Thank you, by the way.

What?

The new sandals.

I didn't realize
how uncomfortable

the expensive ones were.

I'm actually looking forward
to the walk today.

That makes one of us.

So, what did you mean last night
about going to Lazarus?

I said what I said."That we may die with him"?

If we go back into Judea
and they kill us,

like they tried to yesterday...

then that is God's will.

And if it's God's will
for us to die with Jesus,

at least I won't
have to feel anything anymore.

That's what I thought
you meant.

Thomas, in our faith,
it's generally frowned upon

to wish for one's own death.

In the final words
of the last Book of Moses,

God says that if it is between
"life and death,

blessing and curse..."

we should "choose life."

I wonder what that means when
one doesn't have the choice.

I'm just saying
you should hope to live.

It's the nature of life
itself, John.

That's what everyone
has been saying for weeks.

Only time differentiates
one from the other.

We are in the middle

of remarkably unusual
circumstances, Thomas.

No, John, this isn't
an unusual circumstance.

We have been forced to accept
that death is a part of life.

Water?

Uh, I'm good. Thanks.

Peter,

last night my mind was cloudy
from being hit in the head.

Did I say something
about Jairus' daughter?

Keep your voice low.

I did.

Maybe it doesn't matter now.

Lazarus is dead,

Jesus said
he's going to wake him,

and we both know
what that means.

What that can mean. Yeah.

Jesus said he was glad

that he wasn't there
to prevent Lazarus' death,

that whatever's about
to happen next will be His will,

which means
we have nothing to fear.

You make it sound
so simple, hmm?

Pain has a way of, uh,
flattening things.

What was it like
before I got here?

Quieter.

Do you mean I talk too much?

Sometimes.

But I meant
we were relatively unknown.

There was no fame...

or infamy.

No one had
even tried to stone us yet.

That wasn't allyour fault.

Well, if it's not me...

has something gone wrong?

I believe it has, Judas.

Lazarus is dead.

That's what I mean.

We're on the way to our third
shiva in less than a year.

And?

He's the Messiah.

Shouldn't we be winning,
not losing constantly?

This stumbling around

in sackcloth and ashes
all the time...

hardly looks like glory.

Hey.

Only Jesus knows

what true glory looks like.

It certainly can't be this.

Perhaps.

"We'll sit shiva or we won't."

Weren't you the one
who read the letter

saying Lazarus is dead?Yes.

But then there's
what Jesus said after.

"Asleep. Awaken."

Are you familiar
with the "Song of David"?

"How long, O Lord"?

I've heard the first few lines.

I don't have that one memorized.Oh, Mary.

I'm not trying to tell
you how to live your life,

but it's a good one
to commit to memory.

Aren't they all?

Well, it starts
with these big questions.

"How long, O Lord?

Have you forgotten me forever?

How long will you
hide your face from me?"

Mm, been there.

But it ends with acceptance

and even praise.

"But I have trusted
in your steadfast love.

My heart will rejoice
in your salvation.

I will sing to the Lord

because he has
dealt bountifully with me."

Done that.
Hmm.

Although not very pretty.

But in the middle,
there's this line.

"Consider and answer me,
O Lord my God.

Light up my eyes, lest I sleep
the sleep of death."

Sleep and death.

Sometimes they're used
interchangeably.

It appears only God knows
the difference.

Hmm.

Does that answer your question

about why I said
we'll sit shiva or we won't?

You know, before we went
on our missions,

I asked Jesus about the irony

of giving me the ability
to heal others

while still bearing
the burden of my limp.

Did he answer?

He explained some of it,

and it was beautiful.Mmm.

That doesn't mean
that I'm not still in pain.

The pangs were
already getting steadily worse

even before
what happened yesterday, and...

I don't know. I guess
what I'm getting at is...

if Jesus wakes Lazarus
from his sleep...

won't that just present
even bigger questions

than the one
that I've wrestled with?

Of course it will.

And we'll deal with them then.

There's no use
agonizing about it now.

Is all of this
what you expected?

Little James, I-I...

I wouldn't wish what I went
through on anybody, but...

being lost to myself
all those years

means that I never
expected anything.

Except darkness.

Constant shadow.

Screeches in the night.

Strange voices.

Even the daylight felt dark,

with only these rare moments

where flecks of light
would shine through.

And now it's flipped.

Ever since He called my name,

everything has been right,
more or less...

with the occasional moments
of darkness

that hurt
just as much as before,

only now they're the exception
and not the rule.

I've had so much practice
with grief...

and loss.

Unanswerable questions.

Now I'm just grateful...

for the light.

I'm not special, of course.
Please understand.

This is not
an enviable perspective to have.

It's been gained
only by torment.

Mmm.

Well.

I wish that my own torment

would grant me
the same level of acceptance

and wisdom that you've found.

I still have a long way to go.

And you have grown.

I've known you and Thaddeus
the longest,

ever since that first Shabbat
in my tiny apartment

when I had no idea
what I was doing.

Well, to be fair, neither did
Thaddeus and I, so...

I could tell.

None of us could have dreamed

where all of this was headed.

We still can't.

Still.

Arnan.

Martha, may Adonai comfort you,

together with all the mourners
of Zion and Jerusalem.

This earth is a worse place
without him.

He was taken from us
far too soon.

Mary, this is Arnan
from Jerusalem.

An old business partner
of my brother's.

The Golden Age of construction
in the holy city has ended

with the death of Lazarus.

Truly, there was no greater
ironsmith in all of the land.

He was like family

and the beloved friend
of my son's.

He was beloved by all.

Oh, Jabez.Arnan.

Our family lawyer.

Is everything in order?

As you would expect
from Lazarus.

Martha, you and your sister
will be well taken care of.

His property, assets,
and all the money

will pass directly to you,

with a special clause
that the resources be used,

in part, to include the ongoing
protection and care of one Mary,

daughter of Joachim of Nazareth.

Lazarus never said anything.

Why does it not surprise me

that Lazarus is friends
with people from Nazareth?

He was never elitist, Arnan.We grew up there.

Well, I, uh...
I apologize, sisters.

I meant no disrespect
by that comment.

Martha, most of the money
is in the bank,

but there is some in the safe
in the back of the office--

Can we do this later?

Certainly. If you need anything
in the short term...

Oh, and, uh, as I was arriving
to your house,

Nephtali told me to tell you

there is a group approaching
Bethany to see Lazarus.

How many?He said over ten,

coming from the Jordan.

And he said,
"Tell her Heis coming."

He? Who is "He"?

Lord, if you had been here...

my brother would not have died.

Martha--I'm trying not to be angry...

You didn't come sooner, Lord.

I'm just...

Confused.

And devastated.

I understand.

But even now I know...

whatever you ask from God...

God will give you.

My child...Right?

Whatever it is
to give us hope or relief...

I know you can.

Your brother will rise again.

I know he will rise again
with all of us

in the resurrection
at the end of the age.

That's a long time to wait.

That's not the resurrection
I'm talking about.

I am the life
that overcomes death.

I don't understand.

I am the resurrection
and the life.

Whoever believes in me,
even if he dies,

will live.

And whoever lives and believes
in me shall never die.

Do you believe this?

I believe you are the Christ...

the Son of God,
who is coming into the world.

So even what
I do not understand...

I believe.

Now that I'm here...

physical death does not
interrupt our eternal life.

I believe you're the Christ.

That I know.

That's all I need for now.

Quickly, go and get your sister.

Master, should we--?We will wait here.

Forgive me, Rabbi.

Are we supposed to be
understanding

what you are saying?

Yeah, I must admit, um...

I'm wondering the same thing.

I suppose not yet.

Thomas, I--I don't trust my hearing, John.

And I'm too afraid to confirm
what I thought I just heard.

No.

I'm okay.

For now.

He is here
and is calling for you.

Me?

Now?

He's here?

Who are they talking about?I do not know.

Sister of Lazarus,
may Adonai comfort you,

together with all--

I guess she's gone to the tomb
to weep there.

She ought not be alone.

What's wrong?The family plot is that way.

Yes, but you said
people are approaching Bethany

from Jordan, right?

This is the eastern gate.

Lord.

If you were here,
my brother would not have died.

We sent word.

Why didn't you come?

Why did you wait?

Why?

I will show you why.

Where have you laid him?

Lord, come and see.

Who is this man?
Is he friends with Lazarus?

Is he family?

I've never seen him.

I've never seen him like that.

What did he mean?

"I'll show you why"?
Who was that intended to?

He said Lazarus wouldn't die
from his sickness.

What is happening here?

I don't know. I will show you why.

He's healed
countless sick people,

opened the eyes of the blind.

Could he have kept Lazarus
from dying?

Stay calm, okay?He's weeping.

What are you gonna do?Is he mad at us?

Both of you,
stop asking questions.

We'll just watch.

Okay?

Come on, brother.Here you go, Thomas.

Take away the stone.

He said, "Take away the stone."

Was I unclear?MARTHA: Lord.

By this time,
there will be an odor.

He's been dead for four days.

Martha.

Surely you know
that is a minor matter.

Did I not tell you
that if you believed,

you will see the glory of God?

Your only priority
in this moment is faith.

I say to you again,
remove the stone.

Ready? One, two, three.

Come on. Use your legs.

Father.

I thank you
that you have heard me.

I know
that you always hear me...

but I said this on account
of the people standing around,

that they may believe
that you sent me.

"Sent?"

What is he doing?

He already told us last night.
Remember?

He said so that we and many
others might believe in him.

We already believe in him.Not everyone for everything.

Lazarus...

come out!

Laz-- Lazarus!

Laz!

Unbind him.

Get him out of those wrappings.

Martha?

Yes, brother.

I'm here.

What has happened?

You're...

You're back.

Jesus.

Was I...

Am I dreaming?

This is no dream.

You just woke up.

I was asleep?

Back in the land of the living,
brother.

Thank you.

I'm sorry it had to be this way,

but also not, because there is
a higher plan in all of it.

I trust you.

Um...

I know you like
to keep me humble,

but I am naked
underneath these wrappings.

And you could use a bath.

And I'm starving.

Don't be so dramatic.
It's only been four days.

Four days?

The longest nap of your life.

Oh! Oh, gentle.

It's real.

The stories of Jesus of Nazareth
are true.

Of Nazareth?

I have to go back to Jerusalem.

What is it?Jesus of Nazareth.

You know who that is?I've heard his name before.

I have to go back right now.

We have to find out
what happened.

I think it's clear
what just happened.

But how?

Whoa, whoa. Everyone,
go back to your homes.

There is no longer a shiva.
Thank you.

Why aren't you telling people
not to share this?

Why did you do this
in front of so many?

Because it's time, Big James.

You'll understand.

This is everything.

Don't you see?

This miracle will
bring everyone together.

I mean, now,
no one can deny Him.

Thomas.

It's all right.
You'll be all right.

It's all right. Here.

Let's just get you some water.

Get some water.

Have some water. Here,
here, here.

What have you done?

Thomas.

Please. We'll talk.

When?

Soon?

I am tired
of all this "soon" talk.

Thomas, don't. Not, not here--Yes. Right here.

Rabbi, look me in my eyes.

I am.

I always will.That's not an answer!

Why him and not Ramah?

Why not your own cousin, John?
This is sick.

Sorry to interrupt, but we need
a word with him immediately.

Our Rabbi has things
to attend to. Please, please.

Thomas...

I don't expect you
to understand now.

I don't.

What the Father allows...

what I allow,

in order to bring about
my Father's will

and the faith and growth
of His Church.

It can be crushing for you...

And yes, even for me.

It's too much. It's too much.
I don't understand.

I know...

and that hurts my heart.

But please.

Please stay with me, Thomas.

You'll understand in time.

What you just did...

the miracle,
you made a Sadducee very upset.

Good.

The Sadducee has already left
for Jerusalem.

I know his kind.
He will make trouble.

I imagine he will.

And you don't care?

I do care.

It's why I did this.

Now, I must go
be with our friend.

It's okay.

Is your strength coming back?

More and more with every minute.

What about the old aches?Ah!

The click in your knee?Well...

...still there.

Wouldn't be you without it.

No, it-- Oh!

Mm-hm. Okay. That's enough.

What was it like?

I told you,
it was a deep sleep.

You didn't see Eemaor Abba?

Uncle Lamech
with his creepy one eye?

Mary!He terrified me

when I was little.

Remember you used
to call him Cyclops?

Abbanever liked that.

No.

Said the old Greek poems
were pagan.

I wonder if he will have
both eyes in the resurrection.

If there was only someone here
we could ask.

Rabbi.How are we doing?

He still has
the click in his knee.

Ah.LAZARUS: Yes, we are grateful,

but we do have some ideas
for next time.

Well, the Father only grants me
one miracle per person, so...

Oh, okay.

Uh, if I could, may I have
a moment alone with Lazarus?

What are we going to say? "No"?

Finish that.I will.

Stay warm.I will, thank you.

They take very good care of you.It's like having two mothers.

Well, three with yours.

Well, must be nice.

It has its moments.

I almost just said out loud,
"What a day."

Yeah.

That wouldn't quite cover it.

Why are you looking at me
like that?

You're just sitting there.

And?

Look at this place,
in total disarray,

and you're not busying yourself
trying to clean it up.

Give me some of that, hm?

I wish there was some way
we could repay him.

What do you give
to someone who can...

raise the dead?

And we've heard the stories
of him

multiplying loaves and fish
in Decapolis.

What could he possibly need?

Well, surely
he doesn't needanything.

Maybe that's the whole point.

So feeling better?

Understatement.

Well, you certainly
look better.

Thank you.

I should think
I would look really refreshed

after a four-day nap.

Mmm.

Four-day sleep.

But it wasn't really.

I know that.

Why did you do it?I should have anticipated

you'd have questions.I am serious.

Why me?

It was not so much
"who" as "when."

I'm glad it was you, of course.I don't understand.

I'm out of time, Laz.

This was the last.

"The last" what?

Public sign.

You will do
no more big miracles?

Not this side of...

"This side of"?

I have a confession.You have done no wrong.

Not a confession of sin.

Something to acknowledge
you don't know.

Certainly, there is
no depth to that.

Your sisters, they sent word
of your illness

to our lodgings in Perea,
before the end of the feast.

I told them not to do that.Even so...

I didn't come
to Bethany right away.

I had something to do,

a sermon to preach in Jerusalem.

In the temple?Mm.

How'd that go?

Besides the attempted stoning
from the leaders,

uh, I thought
it was above average.

Stoning?

I guess you're not
holding back anymore.

No.

I can't.

The time has come.

What they tried yesterday,
they will soon succeed in doing.

The stoning or the arresting?

You will see.

No, no. Hold on.
Don't do that to me again.

Lazarus, please, just listen.

The waiting, the four days

that your sisters
grieved and suffered...

I need you to know
it was not out of cruelty--

I would never think that of you.But so that the glory

of my Father might be revealed
to all in what happened today.

That was painful for me to watch

those of you
who suffered through this.

Even more painful to know

that it was necessary
for those who witnessed it,

especially my own followers.

But there are those for whom
this will set off

a series of events.

Has it not been that way

with religious leaders
since the beginning?

This is different.

They now have
firmer grounds for punishment.

They're men.
They must save face.

You have become undeniable.I can't have that.

And my followers
will not understand.

I have told them three times.

It's as if they're
incapable of hearing it.

I myself feel
incapable of hearing it.

Even after what happened today?I'm human.

So am I.

But, my friend,
you are the Son of God.

I am.

So I don't understand.

Most won't.

To be frustrated is human,

and I am frustrated

that my students
are constantly missing it.

And they're forgetting
what I have done.

And I'm angry
how the religious leaders

twist the faith into
a craven theater of pretense.

And I dread...

I dread what is to come.

The cup I must drink...

to fulfill my Father's will.

You're scaring me.You've been to the grave...

and you're afraid?

For you.

I love you.

I do not want
to see you suffer.

The Son of Man
must suffer many things.

No, I can't hear this.

The prophet Isaiah
gave you many warnings.

Hm?

Yes.

Yes.

"He was...

despised and rejected by men.

A man of sorrows..."

"Acquainted with grief."

They were just...

words on a scroll.

Now that they are about you...

flesh and blood...

it's another story.

A story nearing its end.

I am tired of you
telling me to trust him.

I'm not going
to trust him anymore.

This is not the time--THOMAS: You saw what he did!

Keep your voice down.All of you saw what he did.

Have a seat--No. Why don't you sit down?

I'm going to stay here.
Look what happened to your head.

Look what happened to Peter.JOHN: Thomas...

You all saw it!Do you have to go out to them?

I'll discuss everything in
detail at the Passover dinner.

I ask him for one thing!

Nothing will be left unsaid.

What if that was your eema? What would you do?

As for the heartbroken...Or someone you love?

...he cannot accept my love
or words tonight.

Don't touch me. I won't calm down.

His brothers will carry him.

See the bigger picture--There is no bigger picture here!

Come. Let's get you
something to eat.

I'm not going to sleep, okay? I'm not tired.

Thomas, I'm just--
No! Don't, don't, don't!

You'll have to replace that.Yeah, Matthew? Why?

Because when Lazarus
loses something,

he deserves
to have it restored?

When other people lose--It's the polite thing to do.

The polite thing to do
is not to break the jar.

I am done with polite.
I am done with all of it.

You don't mean that.Tell me what I mean, Andrew.

Look, you're hurting.

We get it.No, you don't.

If you did,
you'd be as offended as I am.

Thomas, there is no use
putting suffering

on a scale and weighing it.What happened today

should make us
all more united than ever.

We need to set aside
our personal grievances

and be prepared for things
to change in a big way.

Wait, wait, wait!

He doesn't mean you.
He didn't say that.

Don't worry. Let's just
take a moment, all right?

I hate what he's going through.
I do.

But think about
what happened today.

Dozens of mourners saw it
with their own eyes.

The religious leaders,

they'll finally have to admit
who he truly is,

and they'll work with him

to unify us
against our oppressors.

This is one of the greatest days

in the history of our people!

I agree. We just need
to be more sensitive around him.

The Jerusalem religious leaders
don't like it

when anyone is more powerful
than them, Judas.

Mm. I'm not sure this moment
means what you think it does.

If they don't like him,
he can snuff them out

like a lamp with a single word.

That's all it would take.

I'm still wondering
about that myself.

What?"With a word."

Why didn't Jesus just
speak healing from a distance

the way he did for Gaius' son?

He wanted us to see.

To see the stone rolled away...

to see Lazarus walk out
of the tomb with burial strips.

He also wants us to participate.

He could have rolled the stone

and unwrapped Laz
with a word too.

He told us last night, Matthew.
"That we might believe."

It certainly worked for me.

If Jerusalem hears this
and believes,

could this be
the beginning of the army?

When has he said anything
about an army? Ever?

He threw away my dagger.I'm sorry,

but some of you
are thinking too...

Look, the time for restraint
and modesty has passed.

He has asked nothing from us but
to come with him and to observe.

Why are we discussing
anything beyond that?

Because we could
lose Thomas over this.

Look, he told us yesterday...

no one and nothing
could snatch us from his hand.

Well, he said that
of his "true sheep."

Those who hear his voice
and believe.

Maybe Thomas isn't
one of the "true sheep"?

Has the devil gotten into you?

How dare you?Take it back.

Everyone, please!I said, take it back!

Do not dishonor Jesus
by acting this way.

She's right.

Look, the hour is late.

A lot has happened
in the last two days.

Let's just rest.Yeah, you know, I am sorry.

Truly, I--

No. I'm sorry! Truly.
That's not how-- How I meant it.

I love Thomas. I'm just...

I'm just excited, I don't--

James. James.ANDREW: Little James!

I-I'm all right.

I'm fine, I'm fine.

Hey, hey.

It's been coming in waves,
the pangs.

From our fight yesterday?

His pain was already
getting worse

before the attack.

Thomas has a point.

Why everyone and everything
else, but not Little James?

I don't want to talk
about me tonight, okay?

I think we just need
to listen to what Peter said

and get some rest.How can you, in this condition?

That's between me and God.

As should be most of the things

that people have been
arguing about tonight.

We want you to be okay.Thank you.

But standing around and watching
won't do anything about it.

Mary and Martha
have prepared our rooms,

the same ones we had last time.

They won't sleep until we do.

It's disrespectful
to keep them up late like this.

She's right.

I'm going.

Philip, Nathanael, we were
in the same room last time.

Let's go.

What about--I'll stay until it passes.

I just need a few minutes.

Go ahead. We'll be up.

Peter and I can
collect John and Thomas.

Adonai in heaven knows
it'll take all three of us.

Little James,
you sure you're all right?

We've got him. It'll be okay.

Thank you, Matthew.

Here we go.

I just need to sit.I got him. Hold on.

I got you. I got you.Come here.

Thank you.

I guess you got your answer.

What?

We won't sit shiva.

Not tonight.

But I still feel grief.

I feel it too.

I think that's because
Judas was right.

This was
his biggest public sign yet.

We no longer
have to wonder or guess

about when "soon" will be.

The more I read
the songs of David,

the more I felt the need
to write one of my own.

Please just know that
whatever this is going to be,

it's not finished.

You so rarely
let people into your mind.

The times you did,
I was always grateful.

"Darkness is not
the absence of light.

That would be too simple.

It is more uncontrollable
and sinister.

Not a place, but a void.

I was there once.

More than once.

And although I could not
see or hear you,

you were there.

Waiting.

Because the darkness
is not dark to you.

At least, not always.

You wept...

not because
your friend was dead...

but because soon you would be.

And because
we couldn't understand it...

or didn't want to, or both...

the coming darkness
was too deep for us to grasp.

But then so is the light.

One had to come
before the other.

It was always that way with you.

It still is.

Tears fell from your eyes,
and then ours...

before every light in the world
went out.

And time itself
wanted to die with you.

I go back
to that place sometimes,

or rather, it comes
back to me uninvited.

The night that was eternal...

until it wasn't.

Bitter, and then sweet...

but somehow the bitter remained
in the sweet

and has never gone away.

You told us
it would be like that.

Not with your words,
but with how you lived.

The man of sorrows,
acquainted with grief.

That grief wasn't
what we wanted to see...

so we tried to look away,

and in so doing
fulfilled your very essence.

'One from whom people
hide their faces.'

But soon
we couldn't hide from it

any more than we could
stop the sun from setting...

or rising.

I remember you wishing
there could be another way.

And looking back, I do too.

I still don't know
why it has to be this way.

The bitter often mingled
with the sweet.

Maybe I never will.

At least, not this side of..."

♪ My Lord ♪

♪ My Lord ♪

♪ My Lord ♪

♪ My Lord ♪

♪ My Lord ♪