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1
00:00:05,657 --> 00:00:09,618
Come on. Come on, come on, come on.
2
00:00:09,748 --> 00:00:10,836
Come on, come on.
3
00:00:10,967 --> 00:00:12,099
What are you doing?
4
00:00:12,229 --> 00:00:15,145
Oh, I'm waiting to see if that
branch with the crack falls.
5
00:00:15,276 --> 00:00:16,668
How long have you been waiting?
6
00:00:16,755 --> 00:00:20,107
Mm, 23 years, but I
think today's the day.
7
00:00:21,978 --> 00:00:24,546
Nothing prepares one
for the sheer boredom
8
00:00:24,676 --> 00:00:26,069
of endless purgatory.
9
00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:27,549
- We could start a rumor.
- [GASPS]
10
00:00:27,679 --> 00:00:30,160
Ooh, we haven't started
a rumor in a while.
11
00:00:30,291 --> 00:00:31,596
- Mm.
- Can it be devastating?
12
00:00:31,770 --> 00:00:33,555
- Oh, absolutely.
- Mm.
13
00:00:33,729 --> 00:00:35,296
But who should it be about?
14
00:00:35,426 --> 00:00:36,775
Hey, guys.
15
00:00:36,949 --> 00:00:38,690
I just got back from an epic trip.
16
00:00:38,821 --> 00:00:39,996
I went to "Buda-pesht."
17
00:00:40,127 --> 00:00:41,171
You may know it as "Buda-pest,"
18
00:00:41,345 --> 00:00:42,955
but in "Buda-pesht" it's "Buda-pesht."
19
00:00:43,130 --> 00:00:44,914
And it was the Buda-best.
20
00:00:45,088 --> 00:00:46,089
[LAUGHS]
21
00:00:46,176 --> 00:00:47,308
- Uh-huh.
- Can't wait to tell Donna
22
00:00:47,395 --> 00:00:48,395
all about it.
23
00:00:48,483 --> 00:00:49,571
I'm gonna see her next week.
24
00:00:49,701 --> 00:00:51,921
Right, Donna, your island paramour.
25
00:00:52,008 --> 00:00:54,837
Man, this new power has
really opened things up for me.
26
00:00:54,967 --> 00:00:56,752
I never realized how bored I was
27
00:00:56,839 --> 00:00:59,537
just sitting there for 40 years, yeesh.
28
00:00:59,624 --> 00:01:00,712
[LAUGHS]
29
00:01:00,799 --> 00:01:03,672
Anyway, nice to see you
guys. Good to be back.
30
00:01:03,802 --> 00:01:06,153
Good luck with your,
uh, branch there, Sass.
31
00:01:06,283 --> 00:01:07,589
Today could be the day.
32
00:01:07,719 --> 00:01:09,243
Let me know what happens. [CHUCKLES]
33
00:01:09,330 --> 00:01:11,680
Ah.
34
00:01:11,810 --> 00:01:13,769
Random thought, but, uh,
35
00:01:13,856 --> 00:01:15,771
what if we made the rumor about Pete?
36
00:01:15,901 --> 00:01:17,729
Let's make it a doozy.
37
00:01:17,902 --> 00:01:20,167
♪
38
00:01:23,039 --> 00:01:24,997
SAMANTHA: All right,
"Getting Your Groove Back
39
00:01:25,085 --> 00:01:26,825
After a Breakup," here we go.
40
00:01:26,999 --> 00:01:28,479
Yes, this article shall be the salve
41
00:01:28,610 --> 00:01:30,873
to the lingering pain of
my separation from Nigel.
42
00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:33,180
"Number one: take a trip somewhere fun."
43
00:01:33,310 --> 00:01:36,313
ALBERTA: Okay, well,
that one is obviously out.
44
00:01:36,487 --> 00:01:39,350
"Number two: reinvent yourself
with a bold new wardrobe."
45
00:01:39,351 --> 00:01:41,166
- Oh, boy.
- JAY: Guessing that didn't go over well.
46
00:01:41,167 --> 00:01:42,367
Wait, let me see, uh,
47
00:01:42,368 --> 00:01:44,060
"Enjoy a decadent
meal, join a rec league
48
00:01:44,191 --> 00:01:46,454
and meet new people,"
yeah, these aren't helping.
49
00:01:46,584 --> 00:01:48,759
Another great article from
the biased Living media.
50
00:01:48,934 --> 00:01:50,240
TREVOR: Well, that's it.
51
00:01:50,414 --> 00:01:52,241
Looks like I'm gonna
have to quit my job.
52
00:01:52,982 --> 00:01:56,158
I'm-I'm sorry, job? You have a job?
53
00:01:56,289 --> 00:01:58,205
I was keeping it secret so
Mom and Dad didn't freak out,
54
00:01:58,335 --> 00:01:59,684
but yeah.
55
00:01:59,815 --> 00:02:02,252
I've been working remotely
for the last three months
56
00:02:02,383 --> 00:02:04,863
as a financial analyst
at Mahoning Capital.
57
00:02:04,994 --> 00:02:06,648
Apparently, Trevor has
been working remotely
58
00:02:06,778 --> 00:02:08,453
as some sort of financial analyst.
59
00:02:08,684 --> 00:02:10,259
What? How?
60
00:02:10,390 --> 00:02:11,914
TREVOR: I got an
identity on the dark web,
61
00:02:12,044 --> 00:02:13,655
applied online and got the gig.
62
00:02:13,829 --> 00:02:16,484
From there, it was easy.
Sending in my reports,
63
00:02:16,614 --> 00:02:18,007
crushing chats in the company Slack.
64
00:02:18,181 --> 00:02:21,228
It's honestly a great time
for a ghost to have a job.
65
00:02:21,358 --> 00:02:23,099
So he got an identity on the dark web.
66
00:02:23,130 --> 00:02:24,666
How did he even get
through an interview?
67
00:02:24,840 --> 00:02:26,276
I said I needed a written interview
68
00:02:26,407 --> 00:02:28,713
because I have ADHD, which
isn't technically true,
69
00:02:28,844 --> 00:02:30,676
but I also lied about it
in college to get drugs,
70
00:02:30,807 --> 00:02:31,807
so there is a history there.
71
00:02:32,075 --> 00:02:34,230
So why must you quit this job?
72
00:02:34,231 --> 00:02:36,225
Because my boss is demanding our team
73
00:02:36,226 --> 00:02:38,255
attend a mandatory in-person retreat,
74
00:02:38,342 --> 00:02:39,909
which obviously I can't do.
75
00:02:40,040 --> 00:02:43,304
It sucks. Also, it's just rude.
76
00:02:43,434 --> 00:02:45,262
A work thing on a
weekend? People have lives.
77
00:02:45,349 --> 00:02:48,483
- You're dead.
- I'm talking about other people.
78
00:02:51,790 --> 00:02:55,358
Should I get a job? Would
that get my groove back?
79
00:02:55,490 --> 00:02:58,884
Now, a good rumor must be
surprising yet plausible.
80
00:02:59,015 --> 00:03:00,147
- Mm-hmm.
- In life, I once spread a doozy
81
00:03:00,277 --> 00:03:02,410
about Mamie Fish having a back nipple.
82
00:03:02,584 --> 00:03:03,759
- What about Pete's hair?
- Hmm.
83
00:03:03,933 --> 00:03:05,804
Maybe we tell people it's a wig?
84
00:03:05,935 --> 00:03:08,807
- Ooh.
- Or it snaps in place like a Lego piece?
85
00:03:08,981 --> 00:03:10,635
It does look oddly removable.
86
00:03:10,809 --> 00:03:13,812
- Yeah.
- I guess that's what his island girl Donna's into.
87
00:03:13,943 --> 00:03:16,293
That's it. Donna.
88
00:03:16,424 --> 00:03:18,339
What about Donna?
89
00:03:18,513 --> 00:03:20,036
Oh, no...
90
00:03:20,167 --> 00:03:22,430
- Oh...
- Sorry, actually, it's nothing.
91
00:03:22,560 --> 00:03:24,649
- It's not really meant for you to hear.
- No. No, no, no, no.
92
00:03:24,780 --> 00:03:25,781
Thor can keep secret.
93
00:03:25,955 --> 00:03:27,652
Tell no one the baroness died
94
00:03:27,783 --> 00:03:29,567
in season finale of Bodices and Barons.
95
00:03:29,741 --> 00:03:31,482
I haven't seen that yet.
96
00:03:31,613 --> 00:03:33,354
Is excellent, you will enjoy.
97
00:03:33,483 --> 00:03:35,834
Now, what about Donna?
98
00:03:35,965 --> 00:03:37,314
[SIGHS] Okay, fine.
99
00:03:37,401 --> 00:03:40,796
So, rumor has it, Pete's
Caribbean girlfriend Donna
100
00:03:40,970 --> 00:03:42,667
doesn't exist.
101
00:03:43,451 --> 00:03:46,410
- Whoa.
- Peter made the whole thing up.
102
00:03:46,541 --> 00:03:48,890
- I can't... it's very sad.
- It's so sad.
103
00:03:48,891 --> 00:03:50,327
- It's sad.
- So sad. It's so sad.
104
00:03:50,458 --> 00:03:51,850
But remember, Thorfinn,
105
00:03:51,981 --> 00:03:53,809
- mum's the word.
- Mm-hmm.
106
00:03:53,896 --> 00:03:55,724
Thor promise. Is secret.
107
00:03:55,898 --> 00:03:59,467
Sort of like how Baroness died
at hands of own sister Penelope.
108
00:03:59,596 --> 00:04:00,772
- Thorfinn!
- Is great twist.
109
00:04:00,946 --> 00:04:03,340
You will love. [LAUGHS]
110
00:04:04,863 --> 00:04:06,874
TREVOR: Okay, I have great news.
111
00:04:06,875 --> 00:04:09,607
I just Slacked with my
boss Brett, and he is down
112
00:04:09,694 --> 00:04:12,567
to have the work retreat
here at Woodstone.
113
00:04:12,654 --> 00:04:14,873
What? Trevor wants to
have his work retreat here.
114
00:04:15,047 --> 00:04:16,223
How would that even help?
115
00:04:16,353 --> 00:04:17,920
- They won't be able to see him.
- TREVOR: True,
116
00:04:18,050 --> 00:04:19,443
they won't be able to see me,
117
00:04:19,529 --> 00:04:22,446
but they will be able
to see Jay being me.
118
00:04:22,577 --> 00:04:24,970
And now he's suggesting that
you somehow pretend to be him.
119
00:04:25,057 --> 00:04:28,844
[LAUGHS] No. No way.
120
00:04:28,974 --> 00:04:30,280
Wait, how would that even work?
121
00:04:30,367 --> 00:04:31,499
Well, they don't know what I look like,
122
00:04:31,629 --> 00:04:33,457
and I can just tell him what to say.
123
00:04:33,587 --> 00:04:34,719
Or tell you to tell him what to say.
124
00:04:34,893 --> 00:04:37,461
Yeah, Jay could wear one of
those Bluetooth earpieces.
125
00:04:37,592 --> 00:04:39,507
I feel like douchey
Wall Street guys do that.
126
00:04:39,681 --> 00:04:40,725
- Yeah, we do.
- JAY: What is going on?
127
00:04:40,856 --> 00:04:42,813
Why are you so on board?
128
00:04:42,901 --> 00:04:45,164
I'm-I'm not pretending to be a ghost.
129
00:04:45,295 --> 00:04:47,428
No one is asking him to
pretend to be a ghost.
130
00:04:47,558 --> 00:04:50,039
I'm simply asking him to
pretend to be the person
131
00:04:50,126 --> 00:04:52,084
that a ghost is pretending to be.
132
00:04:52,172 --> 00:04:53,173
ISAAC: What's going on, gang?
133
00:04:53,260 --> 00:04:56,698
Oh, Trevor's trying to
get Jay to... [GASPS]
134
00:04:56,828 --> 00:04:58,482
[ALBERTA STAMMERS]
135
00:04:58,656 --> 00:05:00,354
I'm sorry, what the hell is this?
136
00:05:00,484 --> 00:05:02,660
What? Oh, this?
137
00:05:02,747 --> 00:05:06,186
You know, after you all departed,
I finished that magazine article
138
00:05:06,273 --> 00:05:08,405
and I was taken by tip number nine:
139
00:05:08,492 --> 00:05:10,886
"New do, new you."
140
00:05:11,016 --> 00:05:13,018
Hey, hey. Sam. Hey.
141
00:05:13,149 --> 00:05:15,151
Sorry, Isaac d-did something.
142
00:05:15,282 --> 00:05:16,892
It's not important.
143
00:05:17,022 --> 00:05:18,894
"Not important"? The old Isaac
144
00:05:18,981 --> 00:05:21,766
would be offended by
a comment like that.
145
00:05:21,897 --> 00:05:25,770
But the new Isaac says,
"Long hair, don't care."
146
00:05:25,857 --> 00:05:28,337
Sam, please.
147
00:05:28,469 --> 00:05:31,298
Having this job has
made me feel alive again.
148
00:05:31,428 --> 00:05:33,474
I love being back in
the mix with my people:
149
00:05:33,604 --> 00:05:36,563
fun, cool go-getters, instead
of these dead lame-o's.
150
00:05:36,607 --> 00:05:38,740
- No offense.
- No offense taken.
151
00:05:38,870 --> 00:05:40,742
- All good.
- Ugh. I really hate this.
152
00:05:40,872 --> 00:05:42,352
Jay, this job means so much to Trevor.
153
00:05:42,483 --> 00:05:44,876
- We could at least try.
- TREVOR: Also,
154
00:05:45,007 --> 00:05:46,878
I didn't want to make my
finance job about money,
155
00:05:47,009 --> 00:05:49,403
but if you do this, I'll
split my bonus with you.
156
00:05:49,533 --> 00:05:51,535
And he's offering to
split his bonus with us.
157
00:05:52,166 --> 00:05:54,756
- How much?
- Enough to repair the fountain.
158
00:05:54,930 --> 00:05:56,539
He's talking fountain money, Jay.
159
00:05:57,672 --> 00:05:59,543
Okay. [EXHALES] Fine.
160
00:05:59,717 --> 00:06:00,718
Yes.
161
00:06:00,805 --> 00:06:01,850
See? It all worked out.
162
00:06:01,980 --> 00:06:03,330
Oh, stop it.
163
00:06:03,504 --> 00:06:07,769
But I'm just not sure this
sells "Trevor Lefkowitz."
164
00:06:07,899 --> 00:06:09,336
I didn't use my real name.
165
00:06:09,466 --> 00:06:11,990
I picked something hard to google
166
00:06:12,164 --> 00:06:14,210
and impossible to forget.
167
00:06:14,341 --> 00:06:15,777
What name did you use?
168
00:06:17,300 --> 00:06:22,523
H-Hey, guys, it's me, Michael Jackson.
169
00:06:27,925 --> 00:06:29,900
As you all know, my name is Brett,
170
00:06:29,901 --> 00:06:32,010
aka the Brettinator. [CHUCKLES]
171
00:06:32,184 --> 00:06:33,360
I gave him that nickname.
172
00:06:33,490 --> 00:06:35,013
BRETT: Welcome to our team meeting.
173
00:06:35,144 --> 00:06:36,754
I thought it was important
for us to get together IRL,
174
00:06:36,885 --> 00:06:38,234
get some face time
175
00:06:38,365 --> 00:06:39,931
to see if Maggie can
finally take down Dave.
176
00:06:40,062 --> 00:06:41,455
- Hey-yo!
- Ooh.
177
00:06:41,629 --> 00:06:42,760
You guys know I'm engaged.
178
00:06:42,891 --> 00:06:44,371
Nobody cares, Dave, this is happening.
179
00:06:44,458 --> 00:06:45,546
[CHUCKLES]
180
00:06:45,676 --> 00:06:47,025
Classic Maggie. I love it.
181
00:06:47,156 --> 00:06:49,462
So she's harassing him.
182
00:06:49,593 --> 00:06:51,465
I guess that's progress?
183
00:06:51,595 --> 00:06:53,075
It's all good.
184
00:06:53,162 --> 00:06:54,250
BRETT: Uh-oh, MJ,
you're not on the phone
185
00:06:54,424 --> 00:06:56,121
with HR, are you? [LAUGHS]
186
00:06:56,252 --> 00:06:58,950
Uh, no, I'm on a business call.
187
00:06:59,037 --> 00:07:00,387
Stocks.
188
00:07:01,823 --> 00:07:05,653
"Earnings call,
dolla-dolla bills, y'all."
189
00:07:05,783 --> 00:07:08,917
And tell him to raise the roof
when he says it, that's key.
190
00:07:09,047 --> 00:07:11,659
"Earnings call.
Dolla-dolla bills, y'all."
191
00:07:11,789 --> 00:07:14,618
And Trevor says to raise
the roof when you say it.
192
00:07:14,749 --> 00:07:15,750
Earnings call.
193
00:07:15,880 --> 00:07:16,925
[DRUMS ON LEG, SIGHS]
194
00:07:17,099 --> 00:07:18,405
Dolla-dolla bills, y'all.
195
00:07:18,535 --> 00:07:20,450
- [LAUGHING]: Ah!
- Hey, raise the roof.
196
00:07:21,712 --> 00:07:24,541
By the way, Michael, sick
job with the Dreamtek merger.
197
00:07:24,715 --> 00:07:26,282
How did you reach the valuation?
198
00:07:26,369 --> 00:07:29,851
That... is a great question.
199
00:07:29,938 --> 00:07:33,115
How did I come up with the valuation
200
00:07:33,289 --> 00:07:34,769
for the Dreamtek merger?
201
00:07:34,899 --> 00:07:37,772
I ran a DCF with a Monte Carlo sim
202
00:07:37,946 --> 00:07:39,251
to factor in volatility.
203
00:07:39,339 --> 00:07:40,818
Uh...
204
00:07:40,949 --> 00:07:43,038
Mmm.
205
00:07:43,125 --> 00:07:44,431
Oh, you know.
206
00:07:44,561 --> 00:07:48,043
I ran a, uh, a-a-a DTF
down in Monte Carlo.
207
00:07:48,173 --> 00:07:49,740
DTF?
208
00:07:49,871 --> 00:07:52,177
Sounds like me this weekend.
Am I right, Dave? [LAUGHS]
209
00:07:53,091 --> 00:07:55,050
Lock your door, Dave. Maggie's
had a lot of white wine.
210
00:07:55,180 --> 00:07:57,748
You guys, I got big news.
211
00:07:59,184 --> 00:08:00,534
Did you hear about Pete?
212
00:08:00,621 --> 00:08:02,971
Thor told me that his
Caribbean plaything
213
00:08:03,101 --> 00:08:05,756
Donna isn't real. He made her up.
214
00:08:05,930 --> 00:08:07,541
What? Why would he do that?
215
00:08:07,628 --> 00:08:08,890
Oh, I'm not that
surprised. That's his kink.
216
00:08:09,064 --> 00:08:11,196
He likes 'em fake, huh?
217
00:08:11,271 --> 00:08:12,283
Pete's girlfriend is fake?
218
00:08:12,284 --> 00:08:13,547
Pete's girlfriend is fake.
219
00:08:13,721 --> 00:08:15,244
Pete's girlfriend is fake.
220
00:08:15,375 --> 00:08:17,202
Pete? From compliance?
221
00:08:17,333 --> 00:08:19,770
Yep. That's the one.
222
00:08:19,944 --> 00:08:20,945
They have a kid together. I thought.
223
00:08:21,119 --> 00:08:23,557
Nope. Kid's fake, too.
224
00:08:23,687 --> 00:08:26,081
Uh, but I made a major life decision
225
00:08:26,211 --> 00:08:27,865
based on Pete bursting into my wedding
226
00:08:27,996 --> 00:08:30,215
saying how meaningful his
relationship with Donna was,
227
00:08:30,346 --> 00:08:32,783
and you're telling me he made it all up?
228
00:08:32,914 --> 00:08:33,914
Pretty much.
229
00:08:34,785 --> 00:08:37,658
I have to be alone with my thoughts.
230
00:08:37,788 --> 00:08:39,616
Oh.
231
00:08:39,703 --> 00:08:42,793
THORFINN: Yes! Pete with arrow in neck!
232
00:08:42,967 --> 00:08:45,622
He has fake girlfriend!
233
00:08:45,753 --> 00:08:48,669
That is most pathetic, Father! [LAUGHS]
234
00:08:48,799 --> 00:08:50,453
Yes, is very embarrassing!
235
00:08:50,584 --> 00:08:52,629
Which is why you must keep secret!
236
00:08:52,716 --> 00:08:54,683
Why would you say that I made up Donna?
237
00:08:54,714 --> 00:08:56,328
Pete. [CHUCKLES]
238
00:08:56,459 --> 00:08:59,593
Just rumor going around.
Everyone saying so.
239
00:08:59,767 --> 00:09:02,030
But better question is,
240
00:09:02,204 --> 00:09:05,512
why you listening to Thor's
private yellings with son?
241
00:09:05,599 --> 00:09:07,252
Where is this coming from?
242
00:09:07,383 --> 00:09:10,038
Donna is real. She's my girlfriend.
243
00:09:10,168 --> 00:09:13,302
Oh, there you are.
244
00:09:14,216 --> 00:09:15,347
Ow!
245
00:09:15,478 --> 00:09:17,001
What was that sound, Father?
246
00:09:17,132 --> 00:09:20,614
Bjorn miss incredible
moment! Will fill in later!
247
00:09:20,744 --> 00:09:21,744
What was that for?
248
00:09:21,789 --> 00:09:23,225
For your wedding day spectacle
249
00:09:23,355 --> 00:09:25,096
that was rooted in pure fiction.
250
00:09:25,227 --> 00:09:28,273
I left Nigel at the altar based in part
251
00:09:28,404 --> 00:09:30,537
on your tale of this wonderful "Donna."
252
00:09:30,711 --> 00:09:34,105
You fooled me with your pitiful fantasy.
253
00:09:34,236 --> 00:09:35,977
Okay, this has escalated.
254
00:09:36,107 --> 00:09:39,067
I may look laid-back,
but this has my dander up.
255
00:09:39,197 --> 00:09:41,243
I kind of feel like he's
stepping on my thing,
256
00:09:41,330 --> 00:09:43,985
but we don't have to
get into that right now.
257
00:09:44,072 --> 00:09:46,466
Isaac, I would never
make up a story like that.
258
00:09:46,553 --> 00:09:48,903
Donna is real. You've got to believe me.
259
00:09:49,033 --> 00:09:51,209
You've gone too far this time, Peter.
260
00:09:51,295 --> 00:09:55,039
Long hair... do care.
261
00:10:01,089 --> 00:10:03,831
TREVOR: And tell Jay he
needs to do a better job
262
00:10:03,961 --> 00:10:06,220
- selling my anecdotes.
- Trevor thinks you could seem
263
00:10:06,221 --> 00:10:08,101
a little more enthusiastic
about his stories.
264
00:10:08,102 --> 00:10:09,880
Okay, first of all,
that's way too much salt.
265
00:10:10,011 --> 00:10:11,882
And also, he's got to give
me something to work with.
266
00:10:12,013 --> 00:10:13,754
That Pauly Shore thing went nowhere.
267
00:10:13,884 --> 00:10:16,931
"Nowhere"? We shared
an ice cream in Montauk.
268
00:10:17,105 --> 00:10:18,498
Who is Pauly Shore?
269
00:10:18,628 --> 00:10:20,587
A once-in-a-generation
talent, and we went splitsies
270
00:10:20,674 --> 00:10:22,327
on a pint of rocky road, and somehow,
271
00:10:22,458 --> 00:10:24,895
Jay can't even make that interesting.
272
00:10:24,899 --> 00:10:25,980
I got to get back in there.
273
00:10:25,981 --> 00:10:29,204
Hey, do you think I could tell them
that the innkeeper lady's into me?
274
00:10:29,334 --> 00:10:30,684
Think it might buy me
some cred with the gang.
275
00:10:30,814 --> 00:10:31,814
He's not wrong.
276
00:10:31,815 --> 00:10:33,077
[LAUGHS] Okay, fine.
277
00:10:33,208 --> 00:10:35,123
I guess I could be a
little lonely up here,
278
00:10:35,253 --> 00:10:36,907
running this place by myself.
279
00:10:36,994 --> 00:10:38,822
Your character does not
need a backstory, Sam.
280
00:10:38,996 --> 00:10:41,042
[SQUEALS]
281
00:10:42,043 --> 00:10:44,872
Sorry, I was chatting
up that hot innkeeper.
282
00:10:44,959 --> 00:10:46,917
I think she's got a little thing for me.
283
00:10:47,048 --> 00:10:48,528
Take a number, MJ.
284
00:10:48,658 --> 00:10:50,704
She's been giving me eyes all afternoon.
285
00:10:50,834 --> 00:10:51,834
Really?
286
00:10:51,879 --> 00:10:53,750
- Is no one safe?
- BRETT: Okay,
287
00:10:53,837 --> 00:10:55,404
best restaurant in the city right now.
288
00:10:55,535 --> 00:10:57,406
Oh, Le Cirque. Say Le Cirque.
289
00:10:57,537 --> 00:10:58,842
Trevor says it's Le Cirque.
290
00:10:59,016 --> 00:11:01,149
[SIGHS]
291
00:11:01,279 --> 00:11:02,542
Ah... what's he doing?
292
00:11:02,672 --> 00:11:05,370
It used to be Le Cirque 20 years ago,
293
00:11:05,501 --> 00:11:07,895
but now I'd say it's Maxfields,
294
00:11:08,025 --> 00:11:10,288
Carbonara, or Tom and Joe's.
295
00:11:10,375 --> 00:11:13,117
Yeah, but those places
are impossible to get into.
296
00:11:13,204 --> 00:11:15,555
- Yeah.
- Not if you know the chef.
297
00:11:15,685 --> 00:11:17,774
[LAUGHTER]
298
00:11:17,905 --> 00:11:20,255
Okay, he pulled that off, but,
Sam, you got to come get him.
299
00:11:20,385 --> 00:11:21,517
We need the earpiece back in.
300
00:11:21,691 --> 00:11:24,825
Uh, uh, Jay. Um, MJ, Michael Jackson.
301
00:11:24,999 --> 00:11:27,915
I can't remember how you said
you wanted your steak cooked.
302
00:11:28,002 --> 00:11:29,264
Medium-rare.
303
00:11:29,394 --> 00:11:30,613
- [SCOFFS]
- SAMANTHA: Well, actually,
304
00:11:30,787 --> 00:11:33,355
could you come show me? Because...
305
00:11:33,442 --> 00:11:34,791
[SOUTHERN ACCENT]:
I'm all alone up here,
306
00:11:34,965 --> 00:11:36,880
and I don't get to talk to many people
307
00:11:36,967 --> 00:11:39,970
since the mill closed.
Times have been hard.
308
00:11:40,101 --> 00:11:41,537
Is she doing a Southern accent?
309
00:11:41,711 --> 00:11:43,887
You don't have a character, Sam.
310
00:11:43,974 --> 00:11:46,803
Sure, I'll be right there.
311
00:11:48,936 --> 00:11:49,980
Ooh.
312
00:11:50,111 --> 00:11:52,200
Okay,
313
00:11:52,330 --> 00:11:53,810
can I say what we're all thinking?
314
00:11:53,941 --> 00:11:56,683
[SIGHS] I am obsessed with MJ.
315
00:11:56,770 --> 00:11:58,162
He rules.
316
00:11:58,293 --> 00:11:59,860
- [EXHALES]
- ALBERTA: Wow,
317
00:11:59,990 --> 00:12:01,252
- they really like Jay.
- TREVOR: Only because I spent
318
00:12:01,426 --> 00:12:02,906
the last month laying the groundwork.
319
00:12:02,993 --> 00:12:04,342
They don't like Jay.
320
00:12:04,473 --> 00:12:07,041
They like Michael Jackson, aka T-Money.
321
00:12:07,215 --> 00:12:08,215
BRETT: What's crazy is,
322
00:12:08,216 --> 00:12:09,347
before this retreat,
323
00:12:09,434 --> 00:12:11,262
I expected Michael to be so lame.
324
00:12:11,349 --> 00:12:14,048
- What?
- MAGGIE: And old.
325
00:12:14,222 --> 00:12:17,355
His references on Slack
were so dated and cringe.
326
00:12:17,486 --> 00:12:19,096
DAVE: I know, he's
always talking about that
327
00:12:19,227 --> 00:12:21,708
weird ice-skating
rom-com The Cutting Edge.
328
00:12:21,838 --> 00:12:23,797
- Yeah.
- That's a great movie.
329
00:12:23,927 --> 00:12:25,494
Forgive me for being cultured.
330
00:12:25,625 --> 00:12:26,930
I was sure he was gonna be, like, 70.
331
00:12:27,061 --> 00:12:28,802
Totally wrong.
332
00:12:28,932 --> 00:12:31,282
BRETT: Yeah, it turns out he's not
some weird old geezer after all.
333
00:12:31,369 --> 00:12:32,632
Geezer?
334
00:12:32,762 --> 00:12:34,285
Don't listen to them, Trev.
335
00:12:34,416 --> 00:12:36,897
Thor think Le Cirque very cool.
336
00:12:38,246 --> 00:12:40,161
Whatever. Screw this.
337
00:12:41,945 --> 00:12:43,860
[SOUTHERN ACCENT]: I got
the first course for y'all.
338
00:12:43,991 --> 00:12:47,647
It's a corn chowder just
like Meemaw used to make.
339
00:12:47,821 --> 00:12:49,518
That was before the war,
340
00:12:49,692 --> 00:12:52,652
before the winds of change swept
through our little farmstead.
341
00:12:52,782 --> 00:12:55,176
You know, I was out, but I'm back in.
342
00:12:55,306 --> 00:12:57,787
My girl's painting a picture. [CHUCKLES]
343
00:13:02,879 --> 00:13:03,941
SAMANTHA: Hey.
344
00:13:04,272 --> 00:13:06,013
Thor and Alberta told us what happened.
345
00:13:06,143 --> 00:13:07,536
Are you doing okay?
346
00:13:07,667 --> 00:13:09,320
If it makes you feel
better, it's not your fault.
347
00:13:09,451 --> 00:13:10,713
I'm just really charming and likable.
348
00:13:10,844 --> 00:13:13,150
- Jay.
- I'm just quoting the Brettinator.
349
00:13:13,281 --> 00:13:15,631
I just feel like such a fool.
350
00:13:15,762 --> 00:13:20,549
I thought this job was my
chance to relive my glory days,
351
00:13:20,723 --> 00:13:22,507
to pick up where I left off,
352
00:13:22,682 --> 00:13:24,553
but the truth is, it's too late.
353
00:13:24,727 --> 00:13:27,077
The parade has passed me by.
354
00:13:27,208 --> 00:13:30,254
If it help... parade also pass by Thor.
355
00:13:30,341 --> 00:13:32,256
Did not know there was parade.
356
00:13:32,430 --> 00:13:33,823
Did you see parade?
357
00:13:33,954 --> 00:13:36,521
Well, you still have the job.
358
00:13:36,608 --> 00:13:38,654
You could still do
your trading and stuff.
359
00:13:38,785 --> 00:13:40,787
It wasn't about the job.
360
00:13:40,961 --> 00:13:43,746
When I was alive, I was
on my way to being someone,
361
00:13:43,877 --> 00:13:46,575
to making a mark, to becoming a legend.
362
00:13:46,706 --> 00:13:50,318
But now I'm just some dead
guy that nobody remembers.
363
00:13:56,890 --> 00:13:59,631
Look, Trevor, here's the thing.
364
00:13:59,762 --> 00:14:00,762
He's gone, Jay.
365
00:14:00,850 --> 00:14:02,417
Can you just let me make my point?
366
00:14:02,504 --> 00:14:03,766
Who does it hurt?
367
00:14:03,897 --> 00:14:06,464
In my day I see many
die before their time.
368
00:14:06,595 --> 00:14:07,857
Such as Agnar,
369
00:14:07,944 --> 00:14:10,947
who had intestines ripped
out through sphincter.
370
00:14:11,034 --> 00:14:14,559
And Gunhild, who was fed
own eyeballs and beheaded.
371
00:14:14,690 --> 00:14:16,648
- I could go on.
- Please don't.
372
00:14:16,779 --> 00:14:19,434
Feel like posting an update, babe?
373
00:14:19,521 --> 00:14:21,958
Trevor feels like he never got
the chance to make his mark.
374
00:14:22,132 --> 00:14:23,830
Because he died so young.
375
00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:25,962
And he's starting to
realize he never will.
376
00:14:26,049 --> 00:14:28,704
And then Thor tell very
relevant sphincter story.
377
00:14:28,791 --> 00:14:30,314
Please convey.
378
00:14:30,401 --> 00:14:32,752
Yeah, I imagine that must
be really hard for Trevor.
379
00:14:32,882 --> 00:14:34,971
Oh, man, now I'm feeling bad
380
00:14:35,058 --> 00:14:37,060
for the ghost that wanted
to sleep with my sister.
381
00:14:37,191 --> 00:14:39,149
I just wish there was
something we could do.
382
00:14:40,803 --> 00:14:42,196
I think I might have an idea.
383
00:14:42,326 --> 00:14:44,372
Name of sphincter victim was Agnar,
384
00:14:44,502 --> 00:14:46,374
in case have trouble recalling.
385
00:14:50,813 --> 00:14:52,206
Peter, can we talk to you for a moment?
386
00:14:52,336 --> 00:14:54,556
Sure, but I'm pretty cheesed off.
387
00:14:54,643 --> 00:14:56,993
I'm gonna figure out
what sick, twisted person
388
00:14:57,080 --> 00:14:59,343
started this rumor,
and I'm gonna slap them.
389
00:14:59,474 --> 00:15:00,518
With my words.
390
00:15:00,649 --> 00:15:02,129
Using constructive conversation.
391
00:15:02,259 --> 00:15:07,569
We have a confession to make, Peter.
392
00:15:07,699 --> 00:15:09,919
We were the ones that started
that rumor about Donna.
393
00:15:10,006 --> 00:15:11,006
What?
394
00:15:11,051 --> 00:15:12,356
Why would you do that?
395
00:15:13,575 --> 00:15:16,056
We were bored, and it seemed fun.
396
00:15:16,186 --> 00:15:17,361
But why me?
397
00:15:17,492 --> 00:15:19,059
Well, to be honest, I
think we might've been
398
00:15:19,189 --> 00:15:20,625
a little jealous of your power.
399
00:15:20,800 --> 00:15:22,366
We're very happy for you,
400
00:15:22,453 --> 00:15:24,368
but it's not easy hearing
about your escapades.
401
00:15:24,455 --> 00:15:26,196
And then the "Buda-pesht" of it all,
402
00:15:26,283 --> 00:15:28,633
kind of felt like you
were asking for it.
403
00:15:28,764 --> 00:15:30,418
Ah, darn it.
404
00:15:30,548 --> 00:15:33,464
I got so caught up in my hectic
boundary-crossing lifestyle,
405
00:15:33,638 --> 00:15:35,640
I didn't take time to think about
406
00:15:35,727 --> 00:15:37,686
how my travel talk
affects the housebounds.
407
00:15:37,817 --> 00:15:39,557
That's what I call regular ghosts.
408
00:15:39,644 --> 00:15:41,472
- Cool.
- It can't be easy
409
00:15:41,603 --> 00:15:44,040
for Donna either,
dating a 100% free-range.
410
00:15:44,214 --> 00:15:45,259
That's what I call myself.
411
00:15:45,433 --> 00:15:47,652
Well, that notwithstanding,
412
00:15:47,739 --> 00:15:50,612
again, what we did was
wrong, and we are very sorry.
413
00:15:50,742 --> 00:15:52,744
A-And don't worry, we will
tell everyone that we were
414
00:15:52,832 --> 00:15:54,529
the ones that spread the vicious rumor.
415
00:15:54,703 --> 00:15:55,747
Yeah, man, I'm sorry.
416
00:15:55,878 --> 00:15:57,053
[SIGHS] Thanks, I appreciate it,
417
00:15:57,184 --> 00:15:58,881
but I feel like the damage is done.
418
00:15:58,968 --> 00:16:01,144
I mean, how can I
prove that Donna's real?
419
00:16:01,275 --> 00:16:02,667
She can't come here.
420
00:16:02,754 --> 00:16:04,408
You guys clearly can't go there.
421
00:16:04,495 --> 00:16:05,932
I'm the only one with the almost
422
00:16:06,106 --> 00:16:07,585
magical ability to move
between different...
423
00:16:07,716 --> 00:16:09,631
Okay, yeah, I'm hearing it now.
424
00:16:09,718 --> 00:16:11,459
Ooh, this is a great retreat.
425
00:16:11,589 --> 00:16:13,591
From the highs of getting wasted
426
00:16:13,722 --> 00:16:16,029
with you all last night
to the lows of Dave
427
00:16:16,159 --> 00:16:19,165
wimping out and staying
faithful to his fiancée.
428
00:16:19,166 --> 00:16:22,078
MAGGIE: Nice shirt, Dave. Do
they make that in a men's version?
429
00:16:22,209 --> 00:16:23,297
[LAUGHS]
430
00:16:23,471 --> 00:16:26,343
Maggie call Dave woman
in most humorous manner.
431
00:16:26,474 --> 00:16:28,345
[BELL RINGING]
432
00:16:28,476 --> 00:16:29,912
I'd like to say a few words.
433
00:16:30,086 --> 00:16:31,566
You're the man, MJ.
434
00:16:31,740 --> 00:16:33,785
Cool, glad they love Jay.
435
00:16:33,916 --> 00:16:34,916
And just keep listening.
436
00:16:35,004 --> 00:16:37,224
It's true, I am the man. [CHUCKLES]
437
00:16:37,311 --> 00:16:39,443
[LAUGHTER]
438
00:16:39,530 --> 00:16:43,926
But it's only because
I had the best mentor.
439
00:16:44,013 --> 00:16:47,843
A legend by the name
of Trevor Lefkowitz.
440
00:16:47,930 --> 00:16:49,236
What?
441
00:16:49,323 --> 00:16:50,585
JAY: He taught me
everything I know about
442
00:16:50,672 --> 00:16:53,022
finance and hot chicks
443
00:16:53,196 --> 00:16:56,330
and underrated rom-com The Cutting Edge.
444
00:16:56,504 --> 00:16:58,114
Trevor Lefkowitz?
445
00:16:58,288 --> 00:16:59,768
You mean T-Money?
446
00:17:02,379 --> 00:17:04,215
You know him?
447
00:17:04,302 --> 00:17:06,556
We all know Trevor Lefkowitz.
448
00:17:06,688 --> 00:17:08,472
- They do?
- You do?
449
00:17:09,473 --> 00:17:11,431
Sorry. Can I get you guys anything?
450
00:17:11,562 --> 00:17:13,738
Hey, what happened to your accent?
451
00:17:13,912 --> 00:17:15,915
Oh.
452
00:17:16,002 --> 00:17:18,569
That was my twin sister Daisy May.
453
00:17:18,699 --> 00:17:21,485
We were separated at birth, but now
454
00:17:21,616 --> 00:17:23,183
we run an inn together.
455
00:17:23,357 --> 00:17:25,141
She's a laid-back country gal
456
00:17:25,228 --> 00:17:27,622
and I'm a go-go city
slicker, but somehow it works.
457
00:17:27,795 --> 00:17:29,015
Who is this for, Sam?
458
00:17:29,145 --> 00:17:31,843
Anyway, how do you guys know T-Money?
459
00:17:32,018 --> 00:17:34,107
MAGGIE: Well, we don't
know him personally,
460
00:17:34,194 --> 00:17:36,065
but we know the legend.
461
00:17:36,196 --> 00:17:37,196
Back in the day,
462
00:17:37,197 --> 00:17:41,201
Trevor gave his pants to a
junior trader named Pinkus
463
00:17:41,288 --> 00:17:44,204
during a hazing ritual
known as the Run of Fun.
464
00:17:44,334 --> 00:17:46,119
True hero move on Trevor's part.
465
00:17:46,249 --> 00:17:48,295
DAVE: And Pinkus was forever grateful.
466
00:17:48,425 --> 00:17:51,167
When he started his own
firm, he banned hazing,
467
00:17:51,254 --> 00:17:53,082
and then passed the
story down to his mentees.
468
00:17:53,169 --> 00:17:54,954
- They passed it down to us.
- Aw.
469
00:17:55,128 --> 00:17:57,739
T-Money changed the game.
470
00:17:58,522 --> 00:17:59,915
That's incredible.
471
00:18:00,002 --> 00:18:01,786
- He was hot, too.
- Mm.
472
00:18:01,917 --> 00:18:04,093
It just keeps getting better.
473
00:18:04,267 --> 00:18:05,660
How's that for leaving a mark, Trev?
474
00:18:05,790 --> 00:18:07,836
BRETT: We still do the
Run of Fun to this day,
475
00:18:07,967 --> 00:18:12,884
but now it's a fun tribute
to Trevor and his legacy.
476
00:18:13,372 --> 00:18:15,539
They don't like you, Trevor.
477
00:18:15,760 --> 00:18:17,457
They idolize you.
478
00:18:19,938 --> 00:18:21,722
Wait, how could Trevor be your mentor?
479
00:18:21,853 --> 00:18:24,464
Wouldn't you have been
a teenager when he died?
480
00:18:24,551 --> 00:18:26,771
Oh, he was a family friend, and, uh,
481
00:18:26,945 --> 00:18:28,947
I was very advanced.
482
00:18:29,078 --> 00:18:31,558
Like... [WHOOSHES] The timing works.
483
00:18:31,732 --> 00:18:32,907
On the count of three.
484
00:18:33,082 --> 00:18:34,779
One, two, three.
485
00:18:34,909 --> 00:18:36,520
ALL: T-Money!
486
00:18:36,650 --> 00:18:41,090
♪ And I say hey-ey-ey ♪
487
00:18:41,264 --> 00:18:43,570
♪ Hey-ey-ey ♪
488
00:18:43,701 --> 00:18:45,442
♪ I said hey... ♪
489
00:18:45,572 --> 00:18:47,792
[CHUCKLES] Trevor looks so happy.
490
00:18:47,922 --> 00:18:49,141
Good for him.
491
00:18:49,315 --> 00:18:50,621
[ALL GROAN]
492
00:18:50,751 --> 00:18:53,102
That shirt really hikes
up when he's running, huh?
493
00:18:53,232 --> 00:18:55,234
Wonder if they make that
shirt in lady version.
494
00:18:55,365 --> 00:18:56,365
[LAUGHS]
495
00:18:56,409 --> 00:18:57,932
Wait.
496
00:18:58,672 --> 00:18:59,672
I'm going in.
497
00:18:59,717 --> 00:19:00,717
What?
498
00:19:00,805 --> 00:19:03,895
My hair looks too good not
to be flowing in the breeze.
499
00:19:04,025 --> 00:19:09,118
♪ And I say hey-ey-ey ♪
500
00:19:09,248 --> 00:19:12,338
♪ Hey-ey-ey ♪
501
00:19:12,512 --> 00:19:14,688
♪ I said hey ♪
502
00:19:14,819 --> 00:19:18,170
♪ What's going on? ♪
503
00:19:23,477 --> 00:19:25,920
SAMANTHA: Well, Pete, I did
a little research for you,
504
00:19:25,921 --> 00:19:28,746
and I managed to find
some articles about Donna.
505
00:19:28,876 --> 00:19:30,008
She's real, all right.
506
00:19:30,095 --> 00:19:32,358
See, I told you. [LAUGHS]
507
00:19:32,489 --> 00:19:34,186
Wait, why are there articles about her?
508
00:19:34,317 --> 00:19:36,406
Because she sort of murdered her husband
509
00:19:36,536 --> 00:19:37,798
and fled to the Caribbean.
510
00:19:38,019 --> 00:19:39,760
Really?
511
00:19:39,890 --> 00:19:41,327
Oh, shoot.
512
00:19:41,414 --> 00:19:43,067
Yeah, there's actually
an episode of a show
513
00:19:43,198 --> 00:19:45,505
called Vicious Vixens that
delves into the whole situation.
514
00:19:45,635 --> 00:19:47,420
You guys want to watch?
515
00:19:47,594 --> 00:19:48,899
Uh, no, we don't want
to watch an episode
516
00:19:49,030 --> 00:19:50,640
about Pete's psychotic
murdering girlfriend.
517
00:19:50,814 --> 00:19:52,033
Play it.
518
00:19:55,558 --> 00:19:57,952
NARRATOR [ON TV]: They
called her the Slaying Mantis.
519
00:19:58,082 --> 00:19:59,997
Ooh, that's clever.
520
00:20:00,128 --> 00:20:01,564
A cold-blooded killer.
521
00:20:01,738 --> 00:20:02,739
[MAN ON TV SCREAMING]
522
00:20:02,870 --> 00:20:04,132
Whoa, a pitchfork?
523
00:20:04,306 --> 00:20:05,786
Didn't see that coming.
524
00:20:05,916 --> 00:20:06,961
Neither did Gerald, apparently.
525
00:20:07,091 --> 00:20:09,442
NANCY: Do you know Pete?
526
00:20:09,616 --> 00:20:12,227
The guy with the arrow through his neck?
527
00:20:12,401 --> 00:20:14,316
JUDY: Yeah, what about him?
528
00:20:14,447 --> 00:20:18,364
Rumor has it, his hair is
actually some type of wig.
529
00:20:18,538 --> 00:20:21,323
Interesting. I would buy that.
530
00:20:21,454 --> 00:20:24,674
NANCY: Some are saying it
may even be made out of Lego.
531
00:20:24,805 --> 00:20:26,720
Did you guys start that rumor, too?
532
00:20:26,850 --> 00:20:29,026
Oh... yeah.
533
00:20:29,157 --> 00:20:30,637
We didn't... we didn't know
534
00:20:30,767 --> 00:20:32,334
if the Donna rumor
would-would get traction.
535
00:20:32,465 --> 00:20:35,119
So we started the hair thing as a hedge.
536
00:20:35,250 --> 00:20:38,166
JUDY: What a sad loser.
537
00:20:38,297 --> 00:20:39,820
NANCY: Seriously! It's like,
538
00:20:39,950 --> 00:20:42,301
get an afterlife, you freak!
539
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:48,000
- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
39413
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