All language subtitles for Fast.Foodies.S02E12.720p.WEBRip.x264-GalaxyTV

Tonight is all about

The greatest flavors
known to man --

Fast food.

Bring out my dish -- dish --
dish -- dish -- dish!

This is a celebration
of guilty-pleasure eats

And late-night cravings.

- That's right!
- Oh, he got it!

Three award-winning chefs...

Jeremy,
what are you making?

I'm just doing me.

How do you do it?!

...Will compete for the love

Of some hungry,
hungry celebrities.

Hell yeah!
Who are we clapping for?

Let's go.
...By re-creating...

- We have to nail it perfectly.
- Hold on. That is mcdonald's.

...Then remixing
their favorite fast-food dishes.

It's really ducking good.

Come for the food.

Why are these so good?!

I could eat a thousand of those.

Stay for the crazy.

Why is there a spider
in there?

That's gonna make good tv.

This is...

You did a really good job.
Thank you.

Um... It's fine.

The grand finale!

Guys,
tonight we have --

I have no clue.

Are you serious?
No idea. No idea.

You can't build it up like that
and then shoot us down.

Sorry. I don't really know.
I'm terrified.

I'm nervous.
We don't know...
No, no idea.

This is the first time ever
we don't have any clue.

So, we don't have
the dish or the guest.
No.

We're going into this
completely blind.
Yes.

I mean --

- Here we go!
- Yes!

- Hello!
- Hello.

It's like a hide-and-seek
kinda thing.

Oh, my god.
Nowhere... Nowhere...

Huh.

- Hey, guys! What's going on?
- Oh, my god!

I'm back.

Joel mchale was in the premier
episode of "fast foodies"

When he dropped
portillo's hot dogs.

And now he's back, again,
for tonight.

Bring it in. Yes!

We love this guy.
He's a "fast foodies" alum.

Yay!

The chemistry between the chefs
is pretty irresistible.

I like to think
that I know how to cook,

But they're insanely skilled.

I look like
your dad.

I would do the show every week
just for the food.

Not for the personalities
or the friendships -- the food.

As you know, your show
is called "fast foodies."

I shall now tell you
one of my favorite fast foods.

Are you ready?
- Yeah.

- Are you ready, world?
- Yes!

Thanks a lot.

"Fast foodies"
finale.

Reveal my dish.

Oh, god.

Did you build
a rube goldberg machine?

This took me forever.
I hope this works.

Holy joely!
Holy joely!

- Ooh, holy joely!
- Yep.

That's right.
It's a stainless steel boob.

Guys, are you ready?
- Yes.

We're doing
a switcheroo.

What?

I brought in one of my favorite
fine dining dishes.

Tricky, tricky.
It's joel mchale.

So, you know how
this show works, right?

You bring in
the fast food thing,

And then we make
the fancy thing.

Yeah.
I'm changing it up.

So, you didn't
bring a fast food.

You brought
an actual dish.

As you know,
I was born in Italy.

Look it up --
my parents raised me

And my brothers there
for almost a year.

Really?
No joke.

And my mom learned how to make
this beautiful dish.

It's my favorite dish.

So, when I go to almost any
italian restaurant,

I will order
spaghetti carbonara.

Classic.
Hey!
Ooh!

I brought the chefs
spaghetti carbonara,

An amazing dish
from Italy

Which is pasta, usually pancetta
or some kind of bacon,

And then egg, which coats
all the noodles.

It is decadent and lovely.

I'm still
confused, though.
Okay.

You want us all just to make
a bowl of carbonara?

No.
Here's what we're doing.

Since this is
a fine dining dish,

I would like you to make it
a fast food dish.

I mean,
the drama, right?

I would like to see
the burger version of this,

The taco version,
and the hot dog version.

- Wow.
- Okay.

Any thoughts on where you guys
want to go with this?

- I like the idea of a burger.
- I'm gonna roll hot dog.

Well, I'm from miami, so I'd
really like to switch my taco

To an empanada.

Okay.
That would be great.

I would love
an empanada version.

It's the finale.
We're all very, very nervous.

I think this is a whole kind
of a -- a mind --

A mind mess-up.

My mom says I have to stop
saying the "f" word.

So, I'm trying.

Alright, joel, we're gonna take
your spaghetti carbonara,

And instead of trying
to copycat it,

We are going to turn it
into fast food.

And then we go into our
favorite part of the night,

Which is
the remix round.

We're gonna take
the carbonara

And switch this thing up
like we always do

And turn it into
something magical.

You're gonna do
something else to it?

Yeah, we're gonna remix it
into something fancy again.

That doesn't seem
that hard.

We are still gonna vie
for our new,

Blinged-out
chompionship trophy.

Blinged out
for the finale!

We have to cook.
Let's get in the kitchen.

Yeah.
Come on, joel.
Bye!

Oh.
Come on.

Whew!

Alright, joel, what I am doing
for you is the burger.

My burger is tying back
to the pasta carbonara

Is so many aspects.

My beef patty is threaded
with ground pork,

Crispy pancetta, pancetta fat,
salt, lots of black pepper,

A la carbonara,
and mix those together.

I'm gonna create
a smashburger

And then I'm gonna coat
the entire thing

In a pecorino-white cheddar-
gruyère cheese sauce.

And then I'm going to top it
with a beautifully poached egg.

You're gonna cut into the egg,
and it's gonna ooze everything,

And it's gonna make
the sauce.
Oh, I'm allergic.

Uh -- joel!

Who am I, nikki glaser?

I'm actually turning
the spaghetti carbonara

Into an empanada.

So, the elements that really
tie this back into

Joel mchale's mother's carbonara
is gonna be the english peas,

The benton's bacon,
parmesan cheese.

Those will just be twisted
a little bit

Into a filling made
for the empanada.

I want to take all those flavors
of the carbonara

And get it
into an empanada.

I've never
made them --
- Wait.

So, you're from miami, which is
known for its empanadas,

And you've never
made them?
Never made one.

Are you excited to learn
how to make empanadas with me?

I'm excited for you to learn
how to make empanadas.

- Justin, what's happenin'?
- What up, joel?

So good to see you, man.
It really, really, really is.
Can I help you?

I'm gonna take a hot dog,

I'm gonna roll it
with boiled spaghetti,

And then top it with all of
those classic carbonara flavors.

I'm gonna make a mix between
a béarnaise and an aioli,

Top it with a little
calabrian chili,

Top that off with parmesan
cheese, black pepper -- boom!

I'm gonna take
the carbonara fat,

Egg yolk,
some parmesan cheese,

A little dijon mustard,
sherry vinegar,

And make that
carbonara sauce

That's gonna mimic
the mustard

On top of my
pasta-wrapped hot dog

That we're gonna deep fry.

I'm gonna kind of attack this
like a sonora dog --

You know, like the bacon-wrapped
hot dogs you get deep-fried?

Never heard of it?
Never heard of that.

As soon as
this pasta's done,

We're gonna wrap
some wieners together.

And hot dogs!

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Bam!

Ah, that joel!
Damn it!

For the copycat round,

Joel mchale brings us
a fine dining carbonara dish,

Which we are supposed
to turn into fast food.

So, we have the filling made
here for the empanada,

Which is all the carbonara
flavors -- cheese, peas, bacon.

And then we're gonna put that
in the buttery dough there,

Give it a fry.
That does sound very good.

When you said
the word "fry,"

I began to pay attention
to what you were saying.

Kind of a taco.
That's perfect!

Alright, cool.
I'm gonna go drop it in.

Alright,
my first empanada!

You're gonna wrap
the pasta around --

Around the hot dog.
I just came up with this.

I literally have no idea
if it's gonna work.

I mean, hopefully,
these noodles will deep fry

And get really crispy
and crunchy,

And then we're gonna top it
with that nice sauce.

It's always good to hear
a chef go, "hopefully."

I'm going into this nervous
as

I have never wrapped a hot dog
in pre-cooked spaghetti,

Nor should anybody.

How you gonna get the spaghetti
to hold on there?

Joel, I have no idea.

You just dropped this
crazy idea on us.

That's true.

I think the best
thing about carbonara

Is that runny egg yolk.
Yeah.

So, I'm just
poaching some eggs.

I'll finish them with
a little bit of olive oil,

Some maldon salt.

We're gonna
let those hang out.

The buns are toasted.

I made a little divot
so our egg falls right in there.

And then the whole
thing gets enrobed

In pecorino-cheddar sauce.

What you've described
to me was heaven.

My eggs!
Sorry.
Yeah.

I got lost in your eyes.
I apologize.

See, that's right.
That happens a lot.

Guys,
look what's comin'.

I got it.
I don't need any help.

- Welcome back, joel.
- Hey, we're not done yet.

- Delicious.
- Ahh!

I saw that.
I can only do half.

Alright, joel mchale.

I got the hot dog, and I think
I'm gonna go first.

Let's do it!

I took just a nice
beef hot dog

And I wrapped it
in cooked spaghetti noodles,

And then deep fried that
like a sonora dog.

On top of that, I made a sauce
that is pretty much the base

Of a carbonara --
egg yolks, parmesan,

And then all of
the rendered pancetta fat.

There's also some
dehydrated peas on there

For some crunch,
and a little calabrian chili

To mimic the ketchup
that would go on a hot dog.

So, I would suggest biting
from the end closest to you.

No, I'm gonna go
right in the center.
Alright.

Oh, hamburger style.

- Oh.
- I love that.

This is way better
than it should be.

Right?
It looks ridiculous.

This is really... Stupid.

And it's really good.

- Look at that.
- Ooh, dangerous.

Joel, are you getting some of
that spaghetti carbonara flavor

On my hot dog here?

Definitely tasting
the parmesan.
Yeah.

You can't taste the egg,
but it works really well.

If someone said,
"is this carbonara?"

I would say maybe.

I think chef kristen
should go next.

I would love to.
Our burger, it's ground pork,

Ground beef,
crispy pancetta, pancetta fat.

I smashburgered it,
added cheese,

Pecorino, black pepper,
cheese sauce.

Crack into the egg,

And the egg yolk's gonna
spill over your burger.

- Slow-mo.
- Real slow.

- Oh, yeah.
- Ooooh, yeaaah.

Oh, my gosh.

Dear god, it's good.

Looks like a crime scene
over there.

I know I'm a mess.
It's fine.

Fast food makes you feel
a little guilty,

A lot bit dirty,

And that's really
what I tried to tie in.

Bacon and the egg
definitely hit the carbonara,

And especially
with the pecorino.

And then you've got
this lovely burger.

You could sell this.

Look at jeremy's mouth.

Jeremy, why don't you
go next?

Welcome to jeremy's
empanada shop.

I took all those flavors
of the carbonara

And got them inside that flaky,
delicious, buttery dough.

And I got a little bit
of english peas in there,

Some parmesan,
mozzarella, bacon.

And this little
sauce here

Kind of acts as like your egg
in the carbonara.

It's a little aioli
whipped with buttermilk,

Yogurt, and yuzu kosho.

It's really great.
It's very tasty.

And that sauce,
you should bottle that.

It's so good. I don't know
how close it is to carbonara.

Okay, the pancetta, yes.
The cheese, yes. The peas, yes.

Yeah. It's all there.
It's all there.

It's all there,
just differently.
Yeah.

Good job, everybody.
Well done.

But there can
only be one winner,

And that is up to you.

She's destroyed you
again.

The winner,
ladies and gentlemen --

Kristen, guys.
I'm sorry.

Well done!

The burger with an egg,
with the cheese and the bacon

And that sauce,
it was pretty amazing.

So, kristen, thank you.
- Well done.

Thank you so much, joel,
for that win.

I'm gonna happily take that.
- Moving into that remix round,

I say we take some of
these flavors from the carbonara

And make our own little
chef spin to it.

You guys ready
to do some cooking?

I am full.
See you later, guys.

That was great.
Thank you.

Coming up...
Will justin crack?

Can kristen handle the pressure?

Will jeremy lose his shit?

And is joel actually leaving?

Joel, you have
to eat more.

We've got to cook.

I'm full. I am full.

Oh, hi. How's it going?

The grand finale!
That's right.

To livers!

Look at kristen.
That is classy.

Joel mchale doesn't really play
by the rules, as we all know.

And tonight he's creating his
own version of "fast foodies."

For the copycat round,
a little weird,

We took spaghetti carbonara

And turned it
into a fast food dish.

In the remix round, we're gonna
take this beautiful dish

Of carbonara
and put our own chef spin on it.

So, I'm taking
some beautiful asparagus,

Some hand-shucked
english peas,

And these accoutrements
of crispy bread,

Buttermilk dressing, all these
things that you kind of feel

And taste in a carbonara,
but my own chef spin on it.

So, I'm gonna basically
take some peas here.

If you wouldn't mind
helping me shuck them,
open them up a little bit.

Are you serious?
Yeah.

So, I'm gonna do some
wood-fire grilled asparagus

And a soft poached egg.

I made a bacon jus,

And that will kind of go
around the whole dish.

I don't know,
asparagus carbonara

With a little bit
of buttermilk.
So, what do you call this?

I would call this grilled
asparagus a la carbonara.

"A la" is not really italian,
but okay.

Wow.
He's a strong man.

Ah, yes.
Aah!

Roll pasta while getting a shot
from my buddy joel mchale.

- That's right.
- Life-changing moment.

My remix dish
of joel's pasta carbonara

Is something very dear
to my heart.

It is a classic
japanese mentaiko pasta

Where I'm gonna take
cured pollack roe,

Mix that
with spaghetti noodles,

Mix in some cream,
some black pepper,

All of those flavors
that joel loved

About this pasta carbonara,
but then double up on the egg.

I'm talking caviar.
I'm talking quail egg.

Are you gonna
use pancetta at all?

I am, I'm gonna use
the pancetta fat as --

To emulsify the sauce.
I don't deserve you.

I know.
But you got me.

Is that powdered sugar,
kristen?

It's powdered sugar.
Are you making dessert?

It would --
it would appear to be so.

Uh, this is
a new one for me.

Yes. Carbonara dessert.

- Really? Unreal.
- Yes.

I like this risky --
this risky business.

- Spaghetti carbonara dessert.
- Yes.

My remix dish for joel's
pasta carbonara is dessert.

So, the way I'm bringing back

The essence
of the pasta carbonara

Is not in the form of taste,

But quite literally
in the way it looks.

I have shaved white chocolate
that looks like the cheese,

Mango pearls to replicate
the popping egg yolk,

Orange sherbet to be
the vessel for all of it.

So, this is a little risky
because if we have a guest

That is really digging into
the flavors of carbonara,

Then I'm gonna be
in a little bit of trouble.

We're gonna make
liquid nitrogen ice cream.

- Yeah!
- Okay.

Please be careful.
Please be careful.

Ple-- oh, gaaaah.
- Liquid nitrogen.

It's not usually
an ingredient

In traditional
spaghetti carbonara.

Do you understand
how risky this is?

I do.
We're gonna get there.

I'm just gonna mix the base.
We're gonna take this mix --

Here we go.
Slowly start
to put it in, okay?

Slowly.
Yep.

It's a winter wonderland.

How is it?
Perfect.

Yeah.
Perfect!

Let's get it
in the freezer, stat.

Corner!

Alright,
no one open this freezer!

Guys, for your disadvantage,
joel has to be your sous chef

For three minutes.

And at the end,
you have to do

A shot
of green food coloring.

Ah, like the good old days.

Is it not to be drunk?

It's fine, right?
- Time starts now.

Jeremy is up first.

So, I need
an exact size here.
Alright.

Okay, so, this size.
Okay.

Okay?
Uh-huh.

Does that help?

No, no.
I've got a job for you.

Can I help you?
Yeah.

Okay. What next?

This is great.
Aah! Damn it, joel!

Oh, good news, justin!
I'm available right now.

Oh, yes!

Alright, alright.
Let's not waste it.

Okay.

Uh, yeah, we're gonna
need those, joel.

Oh, I'm sure you do.

This is gonna be great.

Is that crime scene tape?

I think we're --
I think my work is done.

Well, good luck.
Thank you.

This is a mess.

Looks like jeremy's station.

Here's your green
food coloring shots.

Oh, you just drank
the whole thing.

Like a leprechaun blowing
moment, is that what it was?

He's spitting it out!
- Ohhh!

- Oh!
- Aw, jeremy!

That was too much
for jeremy.

Aw, man!

That is cured pollack roe --

Sacs inside of pollack
that has all their eggs in it,

And then we cut it open
and pull the eggs out.

So, I mean, it's just
like any other caviar.

Oh, it's really good.
It's really good.

These sacs grow
inside them,

And there is millions
of eggs in here.

I'm going heavy
on the eggs on this

'cause I think everything
about the carbonara

Was about the egg.
Thank you, pollack sac.

Yeah.

- Hey, guys. Two seasons!
- Two seasons!

- We made it!
- Two seasons and a movie.

Jeremy, why don't you go?

Joel, this is my remix
for tonight.

Ta-da!

Alright,
so you know how this goes.

You have to start eating now.
Jeremy, why don't you go?

Joel, this is my remix
for tonight.

To me, the carbonara
we had earlier

Really highlighted the egg.

So, you can see there's a nice
slow-poached egg yolk

On the bottom,
some caviar, some uni.

The bacon's in that brown jus
on the bottom underneath.

Some english peas that you
helped shuck out of the shell.

And that creamy sauce
you get in carbonara

Is kind of this like buttermilk
cheese thing to the right.

So, the idea is
to get in there,

Mix things up, take your toast,
get weird with it.

Jeremy,
this is so good.

Mmm.

I'd say for you guys
to dive in yourselves,

But not yet.

You gotta watch me eat,
'cause it is so good.

Jeremy,
you are good, man.

Does it tie it back
to the carbonara

That mama used to make?

There are tastes of it --
the egg, the pancetta.

And then, like you said, it got
really wacky and wonderful,

And the egg yolk is
really jammy in the best way.

It is so tasty.

Dang it.

It's good.

Well, I guess I'm next,
and joel, this is my remix.

So, when I tasted
your carbonara,

It immediately brought back
this memory

Of a very, very classic japanese
dish called mentaiko pasta,

Spaghetti noodles mixed
with cured pollack roe.

On top of that is gonna be
a raw quail egg yolk

Garnished with caviar.

I'm gonna use chopsticks?

No, you don't --
you can use whatever you want.

I'd like to use chopsticks,
if that's okay.

Alright.
Here we go.

I'm not great. I'm still
learning how it all works.

Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!

No. Yeah!

Oh, there's a lot
wonderfully going on.

So, the pasta
is beautiful.

That fish roe that you said
from the pollack.

Yep.
And then you got
the scallions,

And there's that
spiciness to it.

And then you've got
the caviar.

And the egg is the thing
that settles it back,

And you can taste
the bacon.
Yeah.

It's good.
Thank you.

I heard kristen might
have been doing dessert,

So chef kish,
what've you got for us?

Alright, joel,
this is my remix.

- Wow.
- Whoo-hoo-hoo!

One thing,
when I eat carbonara,

The one thing
I'm missing is acid.

So, what I did is I took
all that lovely acid

That I want in carbonara,
threw it into a dessert.

So, it's basically
an orange creamsicle

With salted yuzu cream,

Cocoa nibs to mimic
the black pepper,

White chocolate
to be the cheese,

Orange sherbet, and then mango
pearls for your yolk.

That's insane.
Oh, my gosh.

I want to point out the mousse
that is noodles here.

Can you see that?
Can you see?

So, I got it to solidify
with just a touch of gelatin.

As you can see,
I hated it.

And it wasn't too --
it was just so lovely,

And I could eat
another one right now.

It's very different,
but --

But there really are
hints of it,

Kind of like,
oh, yeah.

The only thing I'm missing
is like a big wad of bacon.

Joel, thank you
for coming back

And wrapping up season two
of "fast foodies."

I just need the money.

You can decide who's going home
with that chompionship trophy.

- Chompionship!
- Blinged out for the finale!

You took my mom's
incredible carbonara dish,

Turned it into fast food,
which was brilliant.

And then you turned it
into a complete meal.

It was incredible.

But as we know, there are losers
and there are winners.

The winner tonight is...

All three of you guys!

Geez, louise!
Holy shit!

They were all so different,
but this was a complete meal.

And so I said three-way tie.

- Bring it in, guys.
- That was good.

Because you're all winners,
you're also all losers.

So, bring on
the jumpsuits, everyone!

I like it!

Oh, my god, I'm gonna
wear this everywhere.

I think we should just shoot
some spaghetti

With a t-shirt cannon.
What d'ya say?

You guys ready?

We're ready.

Aah!

That's gonna make good tv.
You, joel mchale.

Did the pasta hurt, guys?

Yeah. That was -- that had
a lot of force behind it.

Joel, thank you so much
for coming back

And wrapping up the finale

Of season two of "fast foodies."
- Thank you!

- Let's get the hell outta here!
- Let's go, guys.

Try not to break-dance
your way out.

The dishes worked
so perfectly together.

Such a progressive meal.
I love these guys.

The fast foodies,
bringin' it.

You guys look great.

It's me and the beastie boys.
- Holy joely!