Original subtitles

Carl, that hurts. Stop it.

I can't breathe. Stop it, Carl.

Kill him!

Are you insane?

I hope you have a good excuse.

It's because of the kid who sat down next to my daughter. I don't like him.

In that case, you're excused.

Yeah.

We're with you, man.

These are hard times for a father.

Don't worry, your daughter's smart. You don't need to be concerned.

-Don't you wanna put something on? -Very funny.

At least he's got a car.

This time it's serious.

-Again? -Yeah, he's different.

-Different? -From the previous ones.

Dad, this is Steve.

Dad, this is Diego.

Dad, this is Tommy, John, and Jordan. We'll be upstairs.

Hold up, no one's going upstairs. No way.

What?

-Different how? -He's a romantic.

Thank you.

And he's not a macho, he encourages women to work.

Alright, go sell it over there.

You don't understand anyway.

So explain.

He's super smart.

-Oh, yeah? -Yeah.

He customized his car all by himself. The engine, the paint and the stereo.

Putting stock parts on a lemon? It that what you call genius?

What about school?

If the school of hard knocks issued degrees, he'd be at least...

in the eighth grade.

-He could've joined us. -I can't make more food magically appear.

At least have him sit down.

Once we know him a little better, maybe. Okay?

Are you done or...?

I'm out, see you later, bye!

About damn time.

Is he drowning?

No, but he sure as hell thinks he is. Look, he's gonna panic now.

What are you doing?

We're making a terrorist talk.

You're teaching him about torture?

-That's not torture. -It's waterboarding.

Call it what you will. If it was torture, the Americans wouldn't do it.

What's torture anyway?

It's when a guy is forced to talk until he incriminates himself.

You'll know, once you get married.

Right, because you and Grandma...

I need fresh air.

Jonathan, I told you already. Don't ever mention Grandma to him.

But why not?

Pick up Afghanistan there and put it away. And untie the poor guy.

And?

The windows were fogged up.

They did nothing wrong.

-They were talking. -So?

Girls talk when they're done. Guys don't talk at all.

I know that little prick had something in mind.

-Our daughter isn't a little girl anymore. -I don't care.

You think you're the only one who ever saw her ass. To change her diapers, at that.

All her boyfriends look like they're gonna run off with her and my TV.

-Talk to her. -I'm not her mom.

Talk to her like fathers do.

Fathers don't talk. They wait for problems to solve themselves.

That's what they do.

You're not into it. It's my daughter again.

Eddie.

What's wrong with him?

It's his daughter's love life again.

Oh. Let's cheer him up.

I don't trust that guy.

It would be easier if I just disliked him, but I hate him.

I suppose.

Miss.

That's not necessary, guys.

-Come on, it'll do you good. -Okay.

You know, I have a daughter as well.

I always told her,

"If you don't respect yourself, no one will."

Women have come a long way, but they need to keep their guard up.

It's the opportunity to give your daughter the most beautiful gift there is.

Self-esteem.

What are you getting at?

Explain to her why you think he's the wrong guy for her.

She's not gonna like me meddling in.

We'll help you.

You just have to use some tact, measure, and psychology.

It's him. Go!

Goddamn it.

Don't hurt me, Mr. Hébert!

I do pity him now.

Should we really do this?

I guarantee he'll leave your daughter alone.

-I'm not sure. -You don't want to?

No, trust me, I really wanna do it. It's just that...

something like that can scar a person.

-Just start with the nuts and-- -No, no. No, I mean psychologically.

Who knows how she'll take it?

She'll never know. He won't brag about being scared of you. Right?

Let him go.

Go ahead. Go.

How's Kevin?

-It's over. -No way.

Since when?

Since yesterday. It's okay, I'm keeping it together.

Obviously, it takes time to mourn

and to learn to be alone again, but I mean...

I must go through these stages before I can meet someone new.

It's my new man.

Dad, this is Sébastien.

She can go out with whoever she wants.

True. Sometimes you seem to mistrust my judgment.

-Not sometimes. Always. -You think you'll marry her to a prince?

Not the prince of darkness, hopefully.

Do you know him well?

Well, yeah. What do you mean?

-Well... -You know.

Is he afraid of garlic? Can he see his reflection in a mirror?

Dad...

-You're not gonna turn to dust, are you? -Will you stop?

What do you do for a living, Sébastien?

Well...

What's life anyway?

It's just a long degeneration

that leads us to death, nothingness, and putrefaction.

Christmas should be jolly this year.

-And? -He's worse.

How so?

At least the last guy was alive.

It's for me!

What's that dress?

It's my new look. You should like it, you always complained about my cleavage.

-Hi. -Hi.

I dig you. Me, too.

You'll see. With this, he'll talk and democracy will be saved.

-Yeah. Talk. -Talk!

Yeah!

Again?

Stop it, this isn't a game.

What's wrong with your kid playing with his grandfather?

What do you want?

Whatever there is.

That reminds me of the games I played as a kid.

Such as?

Do you know how to make a hangman's noose?

You got it? Yeah, that's perfect. Thanks.

Here we go.

You're playing with my brother?

We're heading out.

-Where to? -The graveyard.

You're a wrestler, Mr. Hébert?

-Yeah. -You must know the Undertaker.

Not really.

He's an American wrestler. His character's an undertaker, I loved him as a kid.

An undertaker, huh? Makes sense.

So, you were into wrestling?

Yeah. My makeup's inspired by the Undertaker.

It does have some style.

I can show you how.

Yeah.

Seriously? He looks like a raccoon that had laser hair removal.

Whoa. What are you doing?

This time around, we'll save our democracy.

Jonathan, you and I should have a little talk.

Stop that.

Hi!

Is Sébastien here?

-No, he isn't. -Is he coming soon?

-He won't be eating with us. -Too bad.

Things were going a bit fast between us, I wanted some distance.

That's what you tell someone before you dump them.

We've had some good times, but it's time for a break.

-Didn't it mean anything? -Dad, I'm not breaking up with you.

I know.

I'm a little sad.

-I quite like Sébastien, actually. -I know.

I don't get it, Jaimie.

-He's nice, he's smart. -Well, just date him after I dump him.

What's that?

This?

I'll explain. Lately, I've felt that your imagination needs a little balancing.

Less violence, more tenderness.

You wanna play like a sissy?

No. It's more about inventing situations that are more normal. Healthier.

-Such as? -Such as, such as... I don't know.

Okay. Let's say her husband comes back from work.

"Hi, honey. I hope you had a nice day.

What's for dinner, you say?

Well, mac and cheese, as usual. What did you imagine?

With your lame job, that's all we can afford to eat.

Hey, come over here for a second. What's that smell?

You're drunk. You've been drinking again.

And you wonder why I make you sleep on the couch?

You stupid bum, you have no ambition. You can't even get us

a decent life, you pathetic, miserable, little prick."

Actually, let's not worry about it.

Go get your other toys, the usual ones.

The little soldiers.

I don't want Jaimie to dump Sébastien.

-You don't? -Actually, I quite like him now.

Make up your mind.

Sorry, but I've overhearing what you were saying.

Has it occurred to you that she was acting out on principle?

How so?

It's a step between dependency and independence.

Childhood and adulthood. In other words--

Hey! Turn the music down, we can't hear ourselves talk!

Before freeing themselves from parental authority,

teenagers seek confrontation. It's part of their quest for identity.

Okay, but... what should I do?

Maybe if you pretend to hate him, she'll want to stay with him.

Yeah, let's try that.

You're like a shrink.

Almost. I'm one semester away from my degree.

-What? We all do this to pay for school. -Sure.

-Sure. -Sure.

-Sure. -Of course.

Hi.

Hi.

You're actually exercising? Aren't you gonna lose your zombie look?

Why are you here?

Well, I was in the area. I thought I'd come and say hi.

No, that's a lie.

I came to tell you that I miss you.

Me, too.

Let's end the break.

Watch out!

You're still here?

He's insane.

So in the end, he broke up with her?

-Yeah. -Just because you scraped his bike?

I overdid it. Instead of scaring him, I terrified him.

I wanted to make it look like I hated him so that Jaimie would like him more, but...

You're on the right track, Carl.

I think so, too. It's like a psychological recipe.

It's all about knowing the right dosage of confrontation.

If I get it right, I might be able to make her dump the guys I don't like.

Yeah.

-Want him to join us? -No.

There's nothing to fear, none of my wrestling buddies are here.

We could reach a new stage in our relationship. Right, Kev?

-Is it alright if I call you Kev? -No, Dad. Don't call him Kev.

But I'm warming up to him.

Whatever.

-I am. -Dad.