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Ty: I can't say how nice it is
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to talk to a guy like you.
Fatherinlawsus.
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King to king.
Fatherinlawsus: Yes, you have
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00:00:08,651 --> 00:00:09,720
a fine city.
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A good place
to raise kids, I hope.
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00:00:11,356 --> 00:00:14,596
Ty: Oh, yes.
Our infant survival rate is 14%.
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I'm very proud of that number.
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Fatherinlawsus: My boy,
you don't know how hard it is
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to find a king
whose junk still works.
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00:00:21,042 --> 00:00:23,013
You know, a lot of your
contemporaries get their
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genitals blown off in war.
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Ty: My sister is a warrior
around here.
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And there she is now,
ravaged by some battle.
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Stupendous: Did you know we're
getting attacked by hordes now?
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We've really made it.
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00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:35,270
Hey, who's this guy?
He's got a sword!
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Fatherinlawsus: Ha ha ha ha!
Ty: Relax, Stupe.
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00:00:37,241 --> 00:00:38,845
This is
Fatherinlawsus the Great.
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A warrior king
whose vast empire
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stretches from one
body of water to another.
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He's seen noodles before!
It's cute.
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00:00:45,559 --> 00:00:47,294
She doesn't even
know what noodles are.
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Stupendous: Why would you let
a conquering warrior king
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00:00:49,466 --> 00:00:53,073
inside the city walls without
letting me murder him first?
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00:00:53,173 --> 00:00:56,012
Where is your army?
Are they disguised as bushes?
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00:00:56,112 --> 00:00:57,414
Are they behind
trees and walls,
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just waiting to jump out
and scream "Surprise!"
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Fatherinlawsus: That is
a great idea for a party.
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You know, one of my guys
has a birthday coming up.
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I should be real mean to him
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and make him think
I forgot about it
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so when we jump out and yell,
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it almost kills him.
Only almost.
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Stupendous: No, it's not
a great idea for a party.
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It's a great idea for an attack.
What is going on here?
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Fatherinlawsus: I understand
your concern, but I found
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a new way to grow my empire.
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Go ahead.
Tell her the news, son.
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Ty: I'm getting married!
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Stupendous: Uhh...kay?
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Shlub: My own son
getting married.
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I'm so proud of you.
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Now let's talk
consummation tent.
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Shall we put it on the porch
so we can all hear
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the erotic noises when
the blessed moment comes?
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Ty: I don't care where it is
as long as the sex bell is front and center.
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The whole city needs to hear
when it goes ring-a-ding-ding.
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Deliria: Oh, I love a wedding
because it's all about
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me and my blessing.
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00:02:13,734 --> 00:02:16,807
Oh, the weird things I'll
expect you to do to please me.
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Congratulations to us.
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Stupendous: I think
you're being stupid.
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Who gets married
to expand an empire?
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Ty: I do, and it's genius.
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00:04:07,962 --> 00:04:09,365
the Fall of the Eel King,
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00:04:09,465 --> 00:04:12,772
The-The Flaming Eagle
of Lord Philmox,
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00:04:12,906 --> 00:04:16,513
The Dark King's Demise
in Calfothorag,
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00:04:16,580 --> 00:04:21,623
The Cauldron Feint, the-the-the
immolation of Emperor Tong!
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00:04:21,723 --> 00:04:24,028
Ty: Those were all weddings?
I thought they were wars.
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Shlub: The Dance of the Dads
is weighing heavily upon me.
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I'm going to ask that fish
for some pointers.
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Ty: So, you're not worried
about a massacre?
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Shlub: Why would I be?
I'm never the target.
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I'm too beloved.
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Fatherinlawsus:
General Stupendous.
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I thought I'd find you here.
You seem upset.
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Stupendous: Well, yeah.
My dumb brother thinks he can do
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whatever he wants on a whim
with the city
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00:04:43,499 --> 00:04:45,437
I've devoted
my life to defending.
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00:04:45,538 --> 00:04:48,711
I could be out there splitting
your guys' skulls in half,
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00:04:48,778 --> 00:04:50,814
and instead I'm
trying on dresses
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and being told things
about pepper.
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So, yeah, I'm a little upset.
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Fatherinlawsus:
I don't blame you. In my heyday,
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I would have hated to be
denied a good fight.
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I bet you think
I'm some old fuddy-duddy
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who can't swing a sword anymore,
so, I just
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00:05:02,806 --> 00:05:04,976
marry off my daughters
for territory.
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00:05:05,110 --> 00:05:06,446
Stupendous: Well, yeah, kinda.
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00:05:06,547 --> 00:05:08,417
Fatherinlawsus:
And you're right. I'm ready to
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retire from warfare,
but I know you're not,
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and I need someone like you
to lead my armies.
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00:05:13,928 --> 00:05:15,297
Stupendous: You do?
Fatherinlawsus: Tell me.
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00:05:15,430 --> 00:05:17,168
Have you
ever commanded an army of
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5,000 pre-castrated soldiers?
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00:05:19,438 --> 00:05:20,909
Stupendous: "Pre-castrated"?
Like you still
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gotta castrate 'em or...
Fatherinlawsus: No, no, no.
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Pre-castrated.
It's already taken care of.
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Stupendous: Wow.
To answer your question, no,
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but I've always wanted to.
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00:05:28,858 --> 00:05:30,260
Fatherinlawsus:
They're very obedient.
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Totally hairless.
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00:05:31,630 --> 00:05:33,634
Stupendous: I bet
they're gorgeous singers.
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00:05:33,701 --> 00:05:36,439
Fatherinlawsus: Their falsettos
could crack marble.
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Here. This is for you.
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00:05:41,282 --> 00:05:43,153
Ty: I should get out
of this wedding. right?
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Hippocampus: Let's just say
if you go through with it,
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I'm planning on having
a stomach bug that day.
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00:05:47,194 --> 00:05:50,066
Ty: But there's also a chance
that there won't be a massacre, right?
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00:05:50,133 --> 00:05:52,404
What's that thing you were
telling me you just invented?
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00:05:52,572 --> 00:05:55,611
The thing where you can
guess how likely it is that something will happen.
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Hippocampus: You mean odds?
Ty: Yeah. What are the odds
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that I get murdered
at my wedding?
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Hippocampus: Dude,
there's no way of knowing
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00:06:01,422 --> 00:06:02,858
unless you have 1,000 weddings.
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00:06:02,925 --> 00:06:05,363
Ty: Oh, if only there was
a way to go through with this
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00:06:05,497 --> 00:06:07,502
and not go through with it
at the same time.
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00:06:07,602 --> 00:06:09,038
Holy moly.
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00:06:09,138 --> 00:06:10,575
Look, do you see that guy?
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Ty: That wretched baker.
What about him?
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Hippocampus: He looks
exactly like you.
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00:06:14,649 --> 00:06:16,553
Ty: What? No, he doesn't.
He's wearing an apron.
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Hippocampus: His face, Ty.
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Ty: You're right.
Hippocampus: You can get that guy
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00:06:21,195 --> 00:06:23,266
to go to the wedding
in your place.
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00:06:23,366 --> 00:06:24,836
Ty: So, if there's a massacre,
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he gets a sword
through his guts, not me.
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And if there isn't,
we just switch back.
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00:06:29,311 --> 00:06:31,850
Either way, Krapopolis keeps
her king, and I'm a genius.
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00:06:31,950 --> 00:06:34,488
Hippocampus: Or you're a guy who
got a good idea from a genius.
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00:06:34,589 --> 00:06:36,358
Ty: That's its own
kind of intelligence.
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00:06:36,458 --> 00:06:38,029
Hey, you! Mr. Bread Guy!
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Baker: Please. Mr. Bread Guy
was my father.
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I just inherited his debt.
You can call me Cyrus.
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Whoa! King Tyrannis?
Well, I'll be!
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Ty: Actually, that's
sort of the idea.
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How would you like to be me?
Pretend to be.
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I mean, just through my wedding.
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00:06:52,591 --> 00:06:54,061
I've learned that royal weddings
can be dangerous.
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00:06:54,195 --> 00:06:56,633
Hippocampus: We're talking
notoriously massacre-prone.
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00:06:56,700 --> 00:06:58,436
Cyrus: Eh, that doesn't
worry me.
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Honestly, in some ways,
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00:06:59,840 --> 00:07:02,077
death would come as a relief.
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Will there be a buffet?
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00:07:07,487 --> 00:07:09,759
Deliria: No, no, no!
The bride's brining tank
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00:07:09,892 --> 00:07:11,863
should be in the corner,
and there should be enough space
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00:07:11,963 --> 00:07:15,003
for her handmaidens to
stand around and get bad updos.
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00:07:15,137 --> 00:07:18,944
This altar is too plain and it
needs a gutter for blood.
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00:07:19,044 --> 00:07:20,648
If I'm going to bless the couple
with fertility,
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I'm going to need
a lot of goats.
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00:07:22,685 --> 00:07:24,188
And can somebody clear
the area in front?
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That's not enough space
for the Dance of the Dads!
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Stupendous, what on earth
are you wearing?
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Is this some kind of prank?
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You're not allowed
to ruin this wedding.
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00:07:31,837 --> 00:07:34,208
Hermes is going to be here,
and that messy bitch
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talks, and holds a grudge.
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Stupendous: It's a gift
from Fatherinlawsus. He says it commands respect.
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Deliria: Oh, if you say so.
Now, don't forget that the sister of the groom
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00:07:42,792 --> 00:07:44,730
ties up her brother
before the ceremony.
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Stupendous: Why do I
do that again?
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Deliria: Well, I could
come up with some symbolism,
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00:07:48,336 --> 00:07:49,839
but really, I just think
it's funny.
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You tie him up
and then, when it's time,
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you toss him
into the consummation tent.
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And those knots
had better be tight.
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Shlub: I come to you sheepishly.
Deliria: What? You usually
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come to me wolfishly.
What's wrong?
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00:08:00,995 --> 00:08:03,433
Shlub:
It's the Dance of the Dads. I'm wondering
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00:08:03,534 --> 00:08:05,002
how important that is to you.
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00:08:05,103 --> 00:08:08,109
Deliria: It's the final offering
before I grant my blessing.
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You know I love a show, and you
know I love dads dancing.
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Why would you ask
how important it is?
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Shlub: I just wanted
to make sure I knew you
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as well as I thought I did,
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00:08:16,526 --> 00:08:18,062
though I have heard
a crazy thing
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00:08:18,196 --> 00:08:20,233
that at some weddings,
there's a dance between
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00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:22,103
the mother of the groom
and the groom.
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00:08:22,204 --> 00:08:24,408
Deliria: What? This wedding
is about pleasing me, remember.
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How would dancing with
my son do that? Where is he, anyway?
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Ty: OK, first things first.
Do you know what this is?
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Cyrus: A lice pick. Thanks!
I've got lice, like, everywhere.
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Ty: Why don't we
work on your accent?
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"Fatherinlawsus, it is a great
honor to join your family."
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00:08:41,777 --> 00:08:44,315
Hippocampus: That's not what
you sound like.
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Cyrus:
I fart all the time and blame Servant No Name,
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00:08:46,986 --> 00:08:48,757
but everyone knows it's me.
Hippocampus: Wow.
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00:08:48,857 --> 00:08:51,329
Ty: First of all, everyone does
that with Servant No Name,
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00:08:51,429 --> 00:08:52,965
but I agree.
That was incredible!
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00:08:53,066 --> 00:08:55,704
Cyrus: All right, get me
in that toga!
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00:08:59,846 --> 00:09:02,451
Ty: Well, fellas, I'm off
to goof around at the bakery.
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00:09:02,552 --> 00:09:04,455
I'll be seeing you both later.
And remember,
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00:09:04,556 --> 00:09:06,492
no funny business
in the consummation tent.
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00:09:06,593 --> 00:09:08,598
I'll be back before the bell.
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00:09:08,698 --> 00:09:10,768
Cyrus: Oh, no.
I never showed him how to be
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00:09:10,868 --> 00:09:13,005
an indentured bread baker!
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00:09:13,740 --> 00:09:15,711
Ty: Excuse me.
Is this the bakery?
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00:09:15,811 --> 00:09:17,213
Bakery Boss: What the hell
is wrong with you, Cyrus?
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00:09:17,280 --> 00:09:19,553
You're not gonna
pay off your debts with jokes.
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00:09:19,686 --> 00:09:22,357
Get to work
or get to be in debt.
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00:09:27,568 --> 00:09:29,973
Ty: Hello--
Oh. Sorry I'm late.
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00:09:30,073 --> 00:09:32,444
Woman: No crust off my bread.
But if you don't get busy,
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00:09:32,578 --> 00:09:34,515
they'll throw you in the fire
and feed your
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00:09:34,615 --> 00:09:36,084
charred bones to the goats.
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00:09:36,218 --> 00:09:39,324
"Yer worth more to me that way."
Ha ha ha!
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00:09:39,457 --> 00:09:43,466
Man: No, no! Aah!
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00:09:44,068 --> 00:09:46,640
Cyrus: Hey, brother. Wink, wink.
Hippocampus: Hello, Ty.
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00:09:46,707 --> 00:09:47,775
No wink.
Just Ty.
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00:09:47,875 --> 00:09:49,411
Cyrus: What are
you up to, Hippo?
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00:09:49,478 --> 00:09:52,284
Hippocampus:
Making a duplicate me. A Hip replacement
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00:09:52,384 --> 00:09:55,390
Cyrus: So you don't have to go
to Ty--I mean, my wedding.
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00:09:55,490 --> 00:09:58,162
Hippocampus: Yes.
Cyrus: Right on. So, it was the craziest thing.
203
00:09:58,262 --> 00:09:59,932
Jonathan here--
Hippocampus: Servant No Name's
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00:10:00,032 --> 00:10:01,636
name is Jonathan?
Cyrus: Uh-huh.
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00:10:01,736 --> 00:10:03,808
So, he was feeding me figs,
which, wow,
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00:10:03,908 --> 00:10:06,546
what an experience, and anyway,
we got to talking,
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00:10:06,647 --> 00:10:08,583
and I thought,
Jonathan is interesting.
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00:10:08,717 --> 00:10:10,186
He's been on a boat, you know.
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00:10:10,253 --> 00:10:11,322
Jonathan: I fled a famine.
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00:10:11,455 --> 00:10:12,825
I was a doctor in my city.
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00:10:12,925 --> 00:10:14,862
Cyrus: And, Hippo, you're
a really smart fish guy.
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00:10:14,929 --> 00:10:16,933
You're, like, the most
impressive guy I know.
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00:10:17,033 --> 00:10:18,871
Hippocampus: Um, thank you.
Cyrus: Anyway, so, yeah,
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00:10:18,971 --> 00:10:20,775
he's a doctor,
he's been on a boat,
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00:10:20,842 --> 00:10:22,143
and I thought you'd hit it off.
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00:10:22,277 --> 00:10:23,813
Hippocampus: You're being
so nice, Ty.
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00:10:23,914 --> 00:10:27,655
So nice and so,
so out of character.
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00:10:27,722 --> 00:10:29,726
Jonathan: He's nice, huh?
I never knew it!
219
00:10:29,826 --> 00:10:32,531
I guess getting married
can change a guy.
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00:10:32,598 --> 00:10:34,034
Shlub: Children!
Come here, please!
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00:10:34,134 --> 00:10:36,706
Cyrus: I think that's our dad.
He's very fun.
222
00:10:36,806 --> 00:10:38,777
Coming, Dad!
Hippocampus: Ugh. OK.
223
00:10:38,911 --> 00:10:41,850
I'm gonna test this out.
Hippo 2, you ready?
224
00:10:45,824 --> 00:10:47,796
Deliria: Put those over there.
225
00:10:47,896 --> 00:10:49,364
Fatherinlawsus: Knock, knock.
226
00:10:49,498 --> 00:10:51,302
We all clear?
I got my daughter here.
227
00:10:51,402 --> 00:10:53,039
Deliria: Wait!
228
00:10:53,139 --> 00:10:54,742
Oh, sorry.
I thought Ty was in the room,
229
00:10:54,842 --> 00:10:56,513
but it was just this plant.
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00:10:58,784 --> 00:10:59,886
Bring her in.
231
00:10:59,986 --> 00:11:03,025
Ah, there's my future
daughter-in-law.
232
00:11:03,125 --> 00:11:04,796
Stupendous: I thought everyone
was supposed to, like,
233
00:11:04,896 --> 00:11:06,900
stand up and make a big deal
about the bride.
234
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:09,337
Deliria: On my big day?
I don't think so.
235
00:11:09,437 --> 00:11:11,341
Fatherinlawsus: Now, that suit
fits your status.
236
00:11:11,441 --> 00:11:14,782
Stupendous: It does, right?
You're really good at guessing sizes.
237
00:11:14,882 --> 00:11:16,285
Fatherinlawsus: What do you say
before the wedding,
238
00:11:16,385 --> 00:11:17,353
you and me go check out
239
00:11:17,453 --> 00:11:18,790
some pre-castrated soldiers?
240
00:11:18,957 --> 00:11:21,262
Deliria: Meaning they're
slated for castration?
241
00:11:21,329 --> 00:11:24,167
Fatherinlawsus: Common mistake.
No. Pre-castrated,
242
00:11:24,267 --> 00:11:25,604
like ready-castrated.
243
00:11:25,704 --> 00:11:27,641
No disassembly required.
244
00:11:27,775 --> 00:11:30,446
Deliria: Oh, of course.
Good deal.
245
00:11:32,050 --> 00:11:34,421
Shlub: Sons, tell me,
how am I doing?
246
00:11:36,291 --> 00:11:38,295
Cyrus: I think you're doing a great job.
247
00:11:38,429 --> 00:11:40,200
Hippo 2: Yes, fah-der.
Shlub: Thanks, boys,
248
00:11:40,333 --> 00:11:42,838
but I know I'm not.
Your mother cares a lot about
249
00:11:42,905 --> 00:11:44,809
the Dance of the Dads,
and I didn't have the heart
250
00:11:44,909 --> 00:11:46,946
to tell her I have
3 left feet.
251
00:11:47,046 --> 00:11:49,619
Hippo, can you make me
one of those contraptions
252
00:11:49,719 --> 00:11:51,990
that keeps time?
Hippo 2: Gargle gargle.
253
00:11:52,123 --> 00:11:54,629
Cyrus: Maybe I can help you.
Shlub: There's no way.
254
00:11:54,696 --> 00:11:56,733
Cyrus: Just relax
and feel the music.
255
00:11:56,833 --> 00:11:58,737
Shlub: Oh, since when
can you dance?
256
00:11:58,837 --> 00:12:01,242
I'm seeing a whole new side
of you.
257
00:12:01,342 --> 00:12:03,379
Hippo, look at Ty and me.
258
00:12:04,816 --> 00:12:06,218
Hippocampus: He seriously
thinks that's me?
259
00:12:06,285 --> 00:12:09,057
Has my dad never
looked at me before?
260
00:12:10,126 --> 00:12:11,863
Ty: This is actually
so simple and beautiful.
261
00:12:11,963 --> 00:12:15,269
Grain and water brought together
with my powerful hands.
262
00:12:15,369 --> 00:12:17,942
Forged in fire. Bread!
263
00:12:18,877 --> 00:12:20,313
Ty: Ha ha!
264
00:12:20,413 --> 00:12:22,785
Woman: No, stop!
265
00:12:22,885 --> 00:12:26,125
Man: What are you doing?
Man 2: You are wasting dough.
266
00:12:26,292 --> 00:12:28,495
Man 3: Please, please,
please stop that. I have kids.
267
00:12:28,630 --> 00:12:30,534
Man 4: You're gonna
get us all killed.
268
00:12:30,634 --> 00:12:32,905
Man 5: That's yeast!
Ty: Ha ha ha!
269
00:12:33,005 --> 00:12:34,810
Woman: This is fun,
but it's escalating
270
00:12:34,910 --> 00:12:37,014
in a way that I don't know
how to deal with.
271
00:12:37,180 --> 00:12:40,253
Ty: Uhh!
OK, OK, I'll stop.
272
00:12:40,353 --> 00:12:42,090
It's weird.
It never occurred to me
273
00:12:42,190 --> 00:12:45,296
that a lowly commoner--like me--
could have feelings.
274
00:12:45,430 --> 00:12:49,270
Woman: Do our lives--I mean,
our baker lives--do they matter?
275
00:12:49,404 --> 00:12:50,708
Ty: Well, the old me
would have thought
276
00:12:50,841 --> 00:12:52,611
you were a common
kitchen wench.
277
00:12:52,745 --> 00:12:54,147
But you're like a real person.
278
00:12:54,281 --> 00:12:56,953
Woman: And the old me would have
thought you were brain dead.
279
00:12:57,053 --> 00:12:59,625
Ty: Really makes you think,
doesn't it?
280
00:12:59,726 --> 00:13:00,828
Uhh!
Woman: Ah!
281
00:13:00,928 --> 00:13:01,963
Stupendous:
Wow, you weren't kidding.
282
00:13:02,030 --> 00:13:03,199
There's not a hair on 'em.
283
00:13:03,299 --> 00:13:04,669
Fatherinlawsus: I thought
I'd bring 'em
284
00:13:04,769 --> 00:13:06,005
as a wedding present.
For you.
285
00:13:06,105 --> 00:13:07,808
Stupendous: You really don't
want 'em anymore?
286
00:13:07,908 --> 00:13:10,446
Fatherinlawsus: The truth is,
I'm just an old softie.
287
00:13:10,547 --> 00:13:13,620
I want to focus on my family.
I want grandchildren.
288
00:13:13,721 --> 00:13:15,958
Grandchildren
and an enormous empire.
289
00:13:16,058 --> 00:13:17,562
That's what it's
all about, right?
290
00:13:17,662 --> 00:13:19,665
I'll be a general to the kids.
291
00:13:19,765 --> 00:13:22,270
General Granddad.
That's me: Papa.
292
00:13:22,370 --> 00:13:24,407
Stupendous: And where does
that leave Ty?
293
00:13:24,509 --> 00:13:27,147
Fatherinlawsus: Well, once I
have the grandkids, we'll just
294
00:13:27,247 --> 00:13:29,485
send him off on our next
military campaign,
295
00:13:29,586 --> 00:13:31,021
one where we know
he's gonna die.
296
00:13:31,121 --> 00:13:32,658
I say "we" but, of course,
297
00:13:32,792 --> 00:13:34,361
I'd leave that decision
up to you.
298
00:13:34,461 --> 00:13:37,233
I think Persia could be fun.
He'll love the kebabs.
299
00:13:37,333 --> 00:13:39,673
They're slightly different
from how they are here,
300
00:13:39,773 --> 00:13:41,909
but again, totally up to you.
301
00:13:44,415 --> 00:13:45,985
Bakery Boss: Well,
this wouldn't kill a hog.
302
00:13:46,085 --> 00:13:47,788
That's one loaf
off your death sentence.
303
00:13:47,889 --> 00:13:49,692
Ty: Aah! I just
realized something,
304
00:13:49,792 --> 00:13:52,798
and when I realize something,
I need to act on it right away.
305
00:13:52,898 --> 00:13:54,903
Ana, will you get out
of here with me?
306
00:13:55,003 --> 00:13:57,441
Ana: Hey, boss, we're leaving,
and if you don't like it,
307
00:13:57,508 --> 00:13:59,812
you can throw more peasants
into the fire.
308
00:13:59,912 --> 00:14:03,085
Man: Why would you say that?
309
00:14:06,994 --> 00:14:09,732
Hermes: Well, well, well.
310
00:14:09,832 --> 00:14:11,937
Deliria: Hermes, darling,
311
00:14:12,037 --> 00:14:13,974
look at the spectacle
they're putting on for me.
312
00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:17,414
Hermes: Seems promising.
The blood gutter on your altar is positively teeming.
313
00:14:17,548 --> 00:14:19,618
Deliria: Oh, you'll have to tell
everyone back on Mount Olympus.
314
00:14:19,719 --> 00:14:22,859
Not that I care about them.
I have enough attention here.
315
00:14:22,959 --> 00:14:24,328
Hermes: I'm gonna get a drink
and talk trash
316
00:14:24,461 --> 00:14:26,633
with some old spinsters.
It'll really make their day.
317
00:14:26,733 --> 00:14:28,937
Deliria: Oh, they're seated
in a pen by the meat.
318
00:14:29,037 --> 00:14:32,043
Hermes: Now, that is an inspired
seating arrangement.
319
00:14:32,143 --> 00:14:35,316
Not bad, Deliria.
Not bad. Super speed!
320
00:14:35,416 --> 00:14:37,721
Deliria: Good. Seems to have
forgotten the eye.
321
00:14:37,855 --> 00:14:39,491
Stupendous, what are you doing?
322
00:14:39,559 --> 00:14:41,461
Your brother should be
all tied up by now.
323
00:14:41,529 --> 00:14:44,067
Bride: Can we move this along,
please? I'm pruning.
324
00:14:44,167 --> 00:14:47,073
Fatherinlawsus: Soon she'll be
your problem, Ty.
325
00:14:47,173 --> 00:14:49,512
The most ungrateful
daughter ever.
326
00:14:51,115 --> 00:14:52,919
Hippo, I need you
to get Stupe for me.
327
00:14:53,052 --> 00:14:54,188
I need to talk to her.
328
00:14:54,288 --> 00:14:56,759
Hippo 2: Stupe! Stupe! Stupe!
329
00:14:56,893 --> 00:14:58,061
Ana: What are we doing
in the palace?
330
00:14:58,162 --> 00:14:59,497
Ty: You aren't gonna
believe this, but
331
00:14:59,599 --> 00:15:00,735
I'm King Tyrannis.
332
00:15:00,835 --> 00:15:03,405
Hippo 2: Stupe, Stupe, Stupe!
333
00:15:03,540 --> 00:15:06,278
Stupendous: Is a weird
not-Hippo Hippo shouting my name?
334
00:15:06,445 --> 00:15:08,148
Hippocampus: Thank you.
Stupendous: What the--
335
00:15:08,282 --> 00:15:09,619
Cyrus: Oof!
Stupendous: OK,
336
00:15:09,719 --> 00:15:10,888
who did I just drop?
337
00:15:10,988 --> 00:15:12,357
Ty: That's Cyrus, the baker
I switched with.
338
00:15:12,457 --> 00:15:14,295
Cyrus: Hello!
Been having a great time!
339
00:15:14,395 --> 00:15:15,898
Ana: What is going on?
Ty: We did a switch.
340
00:15:15,998 --> 00:15:17,167
Now, Stupe, I know
you wanted to do
341
00:15:17,334 --> 00:15:18,570
a massacre on Fatherinlawsus,
342
00:15:18,703 --> 00:15:20,707
and I ordered you not to,
but I've changed my mind.
343
00:15:20,807 --> 00:15:22,344
Follow your bliss.
Massacre him
344
00:15:22,477 --> 00:15:24,081
and his whole family
and do it now.
345
00:15:24,214 --> 00:15:25,684
I've found a regular woman
to marry.
346
00:15:25,785 --> 00:15:27,655
Stupendous and Ana: What?
Ana: Dad!
347
00:15:27,755 --> 00:15:28,958
Ty: Dad?
What do you mean, "Dad"?
348
00:15:29,091 --> 00:15:30,995
Ana: I did a switch, too!
349
00:15:31,095 --> 00:15:33,098
Ty: Oh, no, oh, no, oh, no,
oh, no, oh, no!
350
00:15:33,198 --> 00:15:35,336
Cyrus: A little help, please!
I know I'm not officially
351
00:15:35,436 --> 00:15:38,142
part of the family, but
at this point, I've invested.
352
00:15:42,350 --> 00:15:43,887
Ana: Dad!
Fatherinlawsus: Ana!
353
00:15:43,954 --> 00:15:46,191
Why aren't you plump and juicy
and sopping wet?
354
00:15:46,325 --> 00:15:48,797
Bride: Because I am!
Can someone get me
355
00:15:48,897 --> 00:15:49,966
out of here now, please?
356
00:15:50,066 --> 00:15:51,468
Fatherinlawsus:
Oh, don't tell me.
357
00:15:51,602 --> 00:15:52,838
You did a switch again.
358
00:15:52,905 --> 00:15:55,210
Is that your
identical cousin Sarah in there?
359
00:15:55,343 --> 00:15:57,380
That's just great.
You'll never be
360
00:15:57,515 --> 00:15:59,251
someone else's problem
at this rate.
361
00:15:59,351 --> 00:16:01,656
Ana: They want to do a massacre!
362
00:16:01,756 --> 00:16:03,626
Hermes: I'm here for this.
363
00:16:03,726 --> 00:16:06,132
Don't worry, spinsters.
Nobody's coming for you.
364
00:16:06,265 --> 00:16:08,637
Ty: Fatherinlawsus is your dad?
Ana: Yes. And you just
365
00:16:08,737 --> 00:16:11,008
told your sister to murder him
and my whole family.
366
00:16:11,108 --> 00:16:13,713
Deliria: Why is anyone
listening to a baker?
367
00:16:13,814 --> 00:16:15,316
I demand an offering
of bread so I can
368
00:16:15,416 --> 00:16:17,988
have a base for my stomach
for the rest of the night.
369
00:16:18,122 --> 00:16:20,059
Now, everybody,
back to your seats.
370
00:16:20,159 --> 00:16:21,862
Ty: Mom, it's me!
I'm Tyrannis!
371
00:16:21,996 --> 00:16:23,967
Deliria: But you're wearing
an apron.
372
00:16:24,067 --> 00:16:26,137
Cyrus: Hello, everyone.
I'm Cyrus, just a baker.
373
00:16:26,238 --> 00:16:29,177
Not important enough to kill.
Just putting that out there.
374
00:16:29,277 --> 00:16:30,581
Ty: Please, Fatherinlawsus,
this is all
375
00:16:30,714 --> 00:16:31,850
just a big misunderstanding.
376
00:16:31,950 --> 00:16:33,452
I'm in love
with your daughter.
377
00:16:33,553 --> 00:16:35,558
Fatherinlawsus: Is it true
about the massacre, Stupendous?
378
00:16:35,691 --> 00:16:38,128
Stupendous: Ty told me to do it,
but I don't want to.
379
00:16:38,228 --> 00:16:39,766
Ana: Where did you
find this family?
380
00:16:39,866 --> 00:16:41,302
Did you do
any research
381
00:16:41,402 --> 00:16:42,805
before you promised me to them?
382
00:16:42,905 --> 00:16:44,575
Ty: I ordered her
not to do it once.
383
00:16:44,675 --> 00:16:46,011
Can't we focus on that part?
384
00:16:46,144 --> 00:16:47,615
Look, I'll order her
not to do it again.
385
00:16:47,715 --> 00:16:50,220
Stupe, don't kill them.
Deliria: Oh. I'm confused.
386
00:16:50,320 --> 00:16:51,590
One of them is Tyrannis, yes?
387
00:16:51,690 --> 00:16:55,029
Shlub: One thing's for certain.
That's our Hippo.
388
00:16:55,129 --> 00:16:56,464
Hippo 2: Aah!
389
00:16:57,300 --> 00:16:58,469
Ty: Ana, you have
to believe me.
390
00:16:58,570 --> 00:17:00,039
I never would have
told my sister
391
00:17:00,172 --> 00:17:01,876
to kill your family if I
knew you were you.
392
00:17:01,976 --> 00:17:03,814
In fact, it's really
out of character
393
00:17:03,914 --> 00:17:05,249
that I supported
a massacre at all.
394
00:17:05,349 --> 00:17:07,755
I just did it because
I want to be with you.
395
00:17:07,855 --> 00:17:10,794
Ana: I do get that, but--
Ty: Everybody, please listen up.
396
00:17:10,894 --> 00:17:12,731
Today, I met
the most amazing woman.
397
00:17:12,831 --> 00:17:15,604
I didn't know she was her,
and she didn't know I was me,
398
00:17:15,704 --> 00:17:16,906
but somehow, it just worked.
399
00:17:16,973 --> 00:17:18,475
Ana: Heh, heh.
Come on, Ty, quit it.
400
00:17:18,576 --> 00:17:20,748
Ty: No, I won't quit it.
Because you don't quit love.
401
00:17:20,814 --> 00:17:22,016
And you don't quit weddings
402
00:17:22,150 --> 00:17:23,653
and you don't quit
consummation tents.
403
00:17:23,753 --> 00:17:26,158
We have it in us to fix
everything about today.
404
00:17:26,258 --> 00:17:28,495
I felt something when I was
hurling buns with you,
405
00:17:28,596 --> 00:17:30,466
and it's a feeling
I never want to lose.
406
00:17:30,567 --> 00:17:32,403
Ana: Ty! I think you got
the wrong idea.
407
00:17:32,504 --> 00:17:35,309
I have fun throwing flour around
with everybody.
408
00:17:35,376 --> 00:17:38,382
That wasn't sexual for me.
And it's kind of weird
409
00:17:38,482 --> 00:17:40,219
that you interpreted it
that way.
410
00:17:40,286 --> 00:17:41,790
Ty: So, you don't want
to marry me?
411
00:17:41,957 --> 00:17:43,226
Ana: I don't want
to marry any man.
412
00:17:43,326 --> 00:17:46,431
I'm super gay.
That's why I keep switching.
413
00:17:46,532 --> 00:17:49,003
And if my father
would listen to me,
414
00:17:49,103 --> 00:17:50,372
we could stop this charade.
415
00:17:50,507 --> 00:17:53,412
Fatherinlawsus: Hmm? Huh?
Did you hear something?
416
00:17:54,314 --> 00:17:55,684
Ty: Well, that was a bust.
417
00:17:55,750 --> 00:17:57,320
Stupendous: Do you know what
I'm looking at right now?
418
00:17:57,487 --> 00:18:00,193
Ty: A bunch of
hairless freaks?
419
00:18:00,326 --> 00:18:02,831
Stupendous: They were gonna be
my hairless freaks.
420
00:18:02,898 --> 00:18:04,802
Fatherinlawsus
promised them to me.
421
00:18:04,936 --> 00:18:07,373
5,000 pre-castrated soldiers.
422
00:18:07,473 --> 00:18:09,611
Ty: Wow. Well, that's one
silver lining.
423
00:18:09,712 --> 00:18:12,818
At least now you don't have to
castrate all those guys, right?
424
00:18:12,952 --> 00:18:15,523
Stupendous: No, it's--
ah, whatever.
425
00:18:17,127 --> 00:18:18,329
Ty: Why are you mad at me?
426
00:18:18,396 --> 00:18:20,133
Stupendous: I'm just
feeling really shut out.
427
00:18:20,233 --> 00:18:22,236
I mean, you want
to find other ways
428
00:18:22,303 --> 00:18:24,307
than war for Krapopolis
to expand.
429
00:18:24,407 --> 00:18:25,877
Where does that leave me?
430
00:18:25,978 --> 00:18:28,416
Ty: I want to find all of the
ways for Krapopolis to grow.
431
00:18:28,517 --> 00:18:30,252
I've even been thinking of
slogans like
432
00:18:30,352 --> 00:18:32,223
"The Stone City With Sass."
433
00:18:32,323 --> 00:18:34,728
Stupendous: So, I'm just
supposed to go along with
434
00:18:34,862 --> 00:18:35,997
everything you say?
435
00:18:36,097 --> 00:18:38,737
Fatherinlawsus valued
my opinions.
436
00:18:38,870 --> 00:18:40,206
We were making plans.
437
00:18:40,306 --> 00:18:42,512
We were talking about
conquering Persia.
438
00:18:42,612 --> 00:18:45,316
You never talk to me
about conquering Persia.
439
00:18:45,416 --> 00:18:47,521
Fatherinlawsus: Ah, you're
telling him about Persia.
440
00:18:47,588 --> 00:18:49,525
Look, Ty,
I'm sorry about my daughter,
441
00:18:49,592 --> 00:18:51,763
but the good news is
we're not gonna have to
442
00:18:51,863 --> 00:18:53,332
send you to your death anymore.
443
00:18:53,432 --> 00:18:55,002
Ty: Wait, what?
Stupendous: It's nothing!
444
00:18:55,136 --> 00:18:57,407
Ty: Cyrus, did my sister
ever mention to you
445
00:18:57,474 --> 00:18:59,378
that she and Fatherinlawsus
were going to
446
00:18:59,478 --> 00:19:01,081
send me to die at some point?
447
00:19:01,181 --> 00:19:03,018
Cyrus: No, but to be fair,
448
00:19:03,118 --> 00:19:04,522
we didn't spend that much
time together.
449
00:19:04,622 --> 00:19:06,324
Ty: Really?
How long did it take you
450
00:19:06,424 --> 00:19:08,028
to get rigged up like this?
451
00:19:08,128 --> 00:19:09,698
Cyrus: Um...
Ty: I thought so.
452
00:19:09,832 --> 00:19:11,368
Stupendous: It really wasn't
that big of a deal.
453
00:19:11,468 --> 00:19:13,707
It would be years away.
I wouldn't do it.
454
00:19:13,840 --> 00:19:16,478
He really only cares about
being a grandfather.
455
00:19:16,579 --> 00:19:18,215
Cyrus: What's a grandfather?
456
00:19:18,315 --> 00:19:19,886
I don't think we have them
in the slums.
457
00:19:19,986 --> 00:19:21,756
Stupendous: It's an old man
who's obsessed with
458
00:19:21,856 --> 00:19:23,292
seeing his nose on a baby.
459
00:19:23,425 --> 00:19:26,431
Hermes: That was the
best wedding I've ever been to.
460
00:19:26,533 --> 00:19:28,669
Deliria: You mean "best"
in a bad way.
461
00:19:28,769 --> 00:19:30,674
Hermes: But that's still good.
Think of it this way.
462
00:19:30,774 --> 00:19:33,479
You could be the goddess of
messy events:
463
00:19:33,547 --> 00:19:35,550
weddings gone awry,
girls' weekends
464
00:19:35,650 --> 00:19:37,353
where the goal is
to reset the dynamic,
465
00:19:37,453 --> 00:19:39,090
revenge that you never
know when it's gonna come
466
00:19:39,190 --> 00:19:40,527
for plucking out
somebody's eye,
467
00:19:40,627 --> 00:19:42,631
road trips where one person
is a secret planner.
468
00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:45,771
Anyway, invite me to
your next party. Buh-bye. Super speed!
469
00:19:45,871 --> 00:19:48,008
Deliria: He's going to
tell everyone what a disaster this was.
470
00:19:48,074 --> 00:19:51,181
Shlub: Oh, Deliria, this doesn't
have to be a disaster.
471
00:19:51,247 --> 00:19:52,585
Deliria: Really? How?
472
00:19:52,685 --> 00:19:54,955
Shlub: I talked to
Fatherinlawsus and he agreed.
473
00:19:55,089 --> 00:19:56,425
The Dance of the Dads.
474
00:19:56,559 --> 00:20:00,867
Oh, Shlub!
Shlub: Fatherinlawsus, shall we?
475
00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:03,372
Fatherinlawsus: Why not?
Might as well have a little fun.
476
00:20:03,472 --> 00:20:06,613
Ha ha ha ha! You're very light
on your feet.
477
00:20:06,679 --> 00:20:08,048
Shlub: Thank you.
The stranger
478
00:20:08,148 --> 00:20:09,719
who I thought was my son
taught me.
479
00:20:09,819 --> 00:20:12,223
Tell me, is there
a Mrs. Fatherinlawsus?
480
00:20:12,356 --> 00:20:14,194
Fatherinlawsus: Oh, no.
She died in childbirth,
481
00:20:14,294 --> 00:20:15,631
giving me my
ungrateful daughter.
482
00:20:15,731 --> 00:20:18,637
Shlub: Good.
483
00:20:18,737 --> 00:20:21,609
Cyrus: I haven't been to a lot
of weddings, and I'm wondering--
484
00:20:21,743 --> 00:20:24,480
Ty: No, it's not normal.
485
00:20:27,353 --> 00:20:30,326
Stupendous: I knew it.
They're beautiful singers.
486
00:20:30,426 --> 00:20:34,301
Cyrus: This is nice.
It's nice with you.
487
00:20:34,401 --> 00:20:37,006
Can I stay?
488
00:20:37,140 --> 00:20:40,345
No, seriously. My boss will
kill me if I try and go back.
489
00:20:47,026 --> 00:20:50,768
Bride: Hello? Is it safe
to come out?
490
00:20:50,868 --> 00:20:52,036
Is anyone there?
491
00:20:53,339 --> 00:20:55,577
Hello? Oh, thank God.
492
00:20:55,677 --> 00:20:58,182
I thought if I was quiet,
I could ride out the massacre,
493
00:20:58,282 --> 00:20:59,519
but then everyone
forgot me and--
494
00:20:59,619 --> 00:21:01,689
Man: Shh.
Bride: What? Is it still going on?
495
00:21:01,790 --> 00:21:04,695
Can you help me get out?
Is it--
496
00:21:05,531 --> 00:21:07,200
Oh, my God!
Man: Aah!
497
00:21:07,300 --> 00:21:11,709
Bride: What the--
498
00:21:11,809 --> 00:21:13,178
Oh! Oh, my--
499
00:21:16,652 --> 00:21:18,623
Bride: Hello?
Hippo 2: Har-lo.
500
00:21:18,724 --> 00:21:20,527
Bride: Hippocampus!
Please help me.
501
00:21:20,627 --> 00:21:22,063
I don't know what's going on.
502
00:21:22,130 --> 00:21:23,900
Hippo 2: I don't know
why I was made,
503
00:21:24,000 --> 00:21:27,339
but I think I exist for evil.
504
00:21:29,243 --> 00:21:30,713
Bride: Well, that's just great.
505
00:21:31,014 --> 00:21:32,584
Man: Did you get any of that?
506
00:21:34,721 --> 00:21:35,990
Woman: Bento.
38632
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