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1
00:00:26,693 --> 00:00:28,227
"Hi, Dave.
2
00:00:28,228 --> 00:00:30,162
"I wanted to introduce myself.
3
00:00:30,163 --> 00:00:31,697
"My name is Laurent,
4
00:00:31,698 --> 00:00:34,533
"and I'm your foreign exchange
student for the semester.
5
00:00:34,534 --> 00:00:36,068
"I like to play soccer.
6
00:00:36,069 --> 00:00:38,137
"Our team is very good.
7
00:00:38,138 --> 00:00:41,407
"I love meeting new people
and experiencing new things.
8
00:00:41,408 --> 00:00:42,474
"I want to let you know
9
00:00:42,475 --> 00:00:44,176
"that I have a girlfriend
back here,
10
00:00:44,177 --> 00:00:47,179
"but she's fine with me having
some fun while I'm in the USA.
11
00:00:47,180 --> 00:00:50,816
"I have enclosed a picture
of me and my best friend.
12
00:00:50,817 --> 00:00:53,085
I can't wait to meet you."
13
00:01:18,144 --> 00:01:20,212
Yo, calm down, fudge packer.
14
00:01:20,213 --> 00:01:22,247
I'm doing
some very important work here.
15
00:01:22,248 --> 00:01:23,982
What is that?
16
00:01:23,983 --> 00:01:25,751
You, you have anything
that could play this?
17
00:01:25,752 --> 00:01:27,052
No, man, not 8 millimeter.
18
00:01:27,053 --> 00:01:28,887
Damn it.
19
00:01:28,888 --> 00:01:30,756
Shantz, your math assignment,
20
00:01:30,757 --> 00:01:31,890
gave you a B-minus
21
00:01:31,891 --> 00:01:33,359
just so we don't ruffle
any feathers.
22
00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:34,993
Sweet!
My genius!
23
00:01:34,994 --> 00:01:36,795
All right, so you have
a geometry test today.
24
00:01:36,796 --> 00:01:39,631
It's on proof of triangles
and polygons.
25
00:01:39,632 --> 00:01:42,101
Triangles and--
and polygons?
26
00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:43,102
Polygons.
27
00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:44,169
Dude, that's--
28
00:01:44,170 --> 00:01:46,605
What, that's in Washington
for history.
29
00:01:46,606 --> 00:01:48,073
I did--
dude, I promise you.
30
00:01:48,074 --> 00:01:49,241
I studied last night.
31
00:01:49,242 --> 00:01:51,276
The polygon
is in Washington, D.C.
32
00:01:51,277 --> 00:01:52,611
No, no,
that's the Pentagon, man.
33
00:01:52,612 --> 00:01:54,313
That's the Pentagon.
34
00:01:54,314 --> 00:01:55,314
Shit.
35
00:01:58,752 --> 00:02:02,021
# I look outside to see
my dream a ways #
36
00:02:03,623 --> 00:02:05,591
Get your powdered-cologne ass
out here!
37
00:02:11,097 --> 00:02:12,998
So she's blowing me.
38
00:02:12,999 --> 00:02:14,366
My grandpa calls.
39
00:02:14,367 --> 00:02:15,367
Oh, no!
40
00:02:15,368 --> 00:02:16,769
Grandpa Ernest.
41
00:02:16,770 --> 00:02:17,936
And you know what I do?
42
00:02:17,937 --> 00:02:20,172
I talk on the phone
the whole time.
43
00:02:20,173 --> 00:02:21,273
Oh, watch this.
I'm gonna get her.
44
00:02:21,274 --> 00:02:22,374
There she is.
There she is.
45
00:02:22,375 --> 00:02:23,375
Get her.
46
00:02:25,578 --> 00:02:27,713
Hey, guys.
47
00:02:27,714 --> 00:02:30,315
Yeah, bro,
she smelled that shit.
48
00:02:33,553 --> 00:02:35,888
Hey, yo, Dave,
get your ass out here
49
00:02:35,889 --> 00:02:37,990
before Robin comes over
and molests me.
50
00:02:39,459 --> 00:02:41,093
Dave better bang that chick
this year.
51
00:02:41,094 --> 00:02:42,094
For a girl like that
52
00:02:42,095 --> 00:02:43,595
to be a virgin,
53
00:02:43,596 --> 00:02:45,698
that's like having wings
and never flying.
54
00:02:45,699 --> 00:02:47,099
That's pretty deep, Jay.
55
00:02:47,100 --> 00:02:48,100
Thanks.
56
00:02:48,101 --> 00:02:49,568
Been saving that one
for a while.
57
00:02:51,271 --> 00:02:52,771
What's up, Dave?
58
00:02:52,772 --> 00:02:54,707
Hey, wiener breath.
59
00:02:56,476 --> 00:02:57,543
You want road head?
60
00:02:57,544 --> 00:02:59,011
I'll give you a blow job
right now.
61
00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:01,080
You know what, Shantz?
You're stupid.
62
00:03:01,081 --> 00:03:03,549
If you're so smart, bro,
you wouldn't have got caught.
63
00:03:03,550 --> 00:03:05,217
Oh, come on,
that was totally worth it.
64
00:03:05,218 --> 00:03:06,385
The look on Lonnatini's face?
65
00:03:06,386 --> 00:03:07,419
That was priceless.
66
00:03:07,420 --> 00:03:09,588
Do the face. Do the face.
67
00:03:12,959 --> 00:03:14,560
Jay, because of us
getting caught,
68
00:03:14,561 --> 00:03:16,695
you now have
some hot piece of tail
69
00:03:16,696 --> 00:03:18,597
staying in your house
for the next three months.
70
00:03:18,598 --> 00:03:19,832
You should be licking
my taint.
71
00:03:19,833 --> 00:03:21,233
Keep asking, buddy.
72
00:03:21,234 --> 00:03:22,501
Never gonna happen.
73
00:03:22,502 --> 00:03:24,970
Look, it will be
an easy "A," okay?
74
00:03:24,971 --> 00:03:27,139
And next year, we'll be laughing
about this at "O" State,
75
00:03:27,140 --> 00:03:28,741
so let's just do
this thing.
76
00:03:28,742 --> 00:03:29,975
Yes!
- Yo!
77
00:03:35,949 --> 00:03:36,949
It's great.
78
00:03:36,950 --> 00:03:38,150
Oh, Disco Danny.
79
00:03:38,151 --> 00:03:40,085
What's up, dude?
80
00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:43,889
Don't fight it.
81
00:03:43,890 --> 00:03:44,890
Ow, fuck.
82
00:03:44,891 --> 00:03:45,891
Bro, bro,
get it away.
83
00:03:45,892 --> 00:03:47,092
What is wrong
with you?
84
00:03:47,093 --> 00:03:48,694
Three years and haven't
gotten it right.
85
00:03:48,695 --> 00:03:51,063
Dude, I feel sorry
for your dick, man.
86
00:03:53,533 --> 00:03:54,900
I get it.
I get it.
87
00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:56,969
Oh, dude, Dave,
check this out, man.
88
00:03:56,970 --> 00:03:58,170
Found it
in my dad's basement.
89
00:03:58,171 --> 00:03:59,438
What is it?
90
00:03:59,439 --> 00:04:01,040
Think it's some kind
of old-school porn.
91
00:04:01,041 --> 00:04:02,274
Is it a film?
92
00:04:02,275 --> 00:04:03,609
Yeah.
93
00:04:03,610 --> 00:04:06,345
There's a light
right there.
94
00:04:06,346 --> 00:04:09,415
She's got
the 70's hip-to-hip.
95
00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:11,250
Look at that.
96
00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:13,352
LL?
What's LL, man?
97
00:04:13,353 --> 00:04:16,221
Uh, "long-haired ladies,"
I guess.
98
00:04:18,024 --> 00:04:20,659
Ladies and gentlemen,
your attention please.
99
00:04:20,660 --> 00:04:21,960
People.
100
00:04:23,530 --> 00:04:25,464
People!
101
00:04:26,933 --> 00:04:29,635
Shut your gaping holes!
102
00:04:32,272 --> 00:04:34,173
All right.
103
00:04:34,174 --> 00:04:36,542
Now, you're all here
because your exchange students
104
00:04:36,543 --> 00:04:37,676
are arriving today.
105
00:04:37,677 --> 00:04:38,944
Wait, wait a second.
106
00:04:38,945 --> 00:04:43,649
I thought we were
the exchange students.
107
00:04:47,420 --> 00:04:48,987
Oh, man.
108
00:04:48,988 --> 00:04:51,957
I was all ready to go
to Amsterdam, man.
109
00:04:54,194 --> 00:04:58,630
Ah, crap, I even broke up
with my girlfriend.
110
00:04:58,631 --> 00:04:59,665
And I quit my job
111
00:04:59,666 --> 00:05:02,001
at Hotdog on a Stick, man.
112
00:05:02,002 --> 00:05:03,502
I told my dad off.
113
00:05:05,572 --> 00:05:08,974
It was hard to pack
the sleeping bag.
114
00:05:08,975 --> 00:05:10,309
That's a great example
115
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:11,944
of what happens
when you're dumb.
116
00:05:13,913 --> 00:05:16,248
Is everyone else sure
they're in the right place?
117
00:05:16,249 --> 00:05:17,349
Yes, ma'am.
- Right here.
118
00:05:17,350 --> 00:05:18,784
Present.
119
00:05:18,785 --> 00:05:19,852
Good.
120
00:05:19,853 --> 00:05:20,919
Here are the files
121
00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:23,022
for each of your
foreign exchange students.
122
00:05:23,023 --> 00:05:24,456
They are being dropped off
123
00:05:24,457 --> 00:05:27,960
at 3:00
in the school parking lot.
124
00:05:27,961 --> 00:05:30,629
You all are going to be
shining examples
125
00:05:30,630 --> 00:05:32,731
of what our beautiful school
can produce.
126
00:05:32,732 --> 00:05:34,767
Uh, Principle Lonnatini,
127
00:05:34,768 --> 00:05:38,337
the four of us would like
to gracefully withdraw
128
00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:40,339
from this wonderful opportunity
129
00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:42,241
to allow other
deserving students the chance--
130
00:05:42,242 --> 00:05:44,076
Zip it, meathead.
131
00:05:45,945 --> 00:05:47,980
After third period,
I'd like to see the four of you
132
00:05:47,981 --> 00:05:49,314
in my office.
133
00:05:49,315 --> 00:05:51,817
Dude, this is gonna
totally suck balls, man.
134
00:05:51,818 --> 00:05:53,352
You and Jay get
hot, horny girl babes.
135
00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:55,621
I get some eastern blockhead.
136
00:05:55,622 --> 00:05:57,056
Dude, come on, man.
137
00:05:57,057 --> 00:05:58,590
I deserve it, all right?
138
00:05:58,591 --> 00:06:00,993
After all these years waiting
for Robin to come around.
139
00:06:00,994 --> 00:06:01,994
Whatever.
140
00:06:01,995 --> 00:06:03,562
Oh, fuck, Mia Ho.
Turn around.
141
00:06:03,563 --> 00:06:04,563
Who's ho?
142
00:06:04,564 --> 00:06:05,564
Mia Ho.
143
00:06:05,565 --> 00:06:08,000
Just turn around please.
144
00:06:08,001 --> 00:06:09,301
Hi, Dave.
145
00:06:09,302 --> 00:06:11,670
Hey, what's up, Ho?
146
00:06:11,671 --> 00:06:12,838
Hi, Shantz.
147
00:06:12,839 --> 00:06:14,473
Oh, my god, Dave.
148
00:06:14,474 --> 00:06:16,709
This week's issue of
The Hughes Herald is brilliant.
149
00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:18,477
The piece you did
on the school marching band
150
00:06:18,478 --> 00:06:19,645
was genius.
151
00:06:19,646 --> 00:06:21,180
I really like
that you used my name in it.
152
00:06:21,181 --> 00:06:22,181
That was so sweet.
153
00:06:22,182 --> 00:06:24,516
Well, you know, I used
154
00:06:24,517 --> 00:06:26,085
everyone in the band's name,
so it's...
155
00:06:26,086 --> 00:06:27,853
Oh. I know.
156
00:06:27,854 --> 00:06:29,355
But it's totally sweet.
157
00:06:29,356 --> 00:06:30,456
So you want to hang out later?
158
00:06:30,457 --> 00:06:31,924
Oh, sorry,
159
00:06:31,925 --> 00:06:33,592
but he can't.
160
00:06:33,593 --> 00:06:34,727
We're having a party tonight
161
00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:36,495
to loosen up
our foreign exchange students.
162
00:06:36,496 --> 00:06:38,397
Maybe another time, Ho.
163
00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:39,598
All right.
164
00:06:39,599 --> 00:06:43,335
Shantz, why do you always
call me by my last name?
165
00:06:43,336 --> 00:06:44,336
It's a jock thing.
166
00:06:44,337 --> 00:06:45,604
I do it to everybody.
167
00:06:45,605 --> 00:06:47,506
Hey, Boyle,
what's up, buddy?
168
00:06:47,507 --> 00:06:48,507
It's what I do.
169
00:06:48,508 --> 00:06:49,508
Keepin' it real.
170
00:06:49,509 --> 00:06:50,509
All right.
171
00:06:50,510 --> 00:06:51,910
Whatever.
172
00:06:51,911 --> 00:06:54,113
Well, anyway,
maybe another time, Dave.
173
00:06:56,216 --> 00:06:58,350
Any time.
174
00:06:58,351 --> 00:07:00,652
All righty.
175
00:07:00,653 --> 00:07:03,322
Anyhoo.
176
00:07:03,323 --> 00:07:05,991
My little Davie ready to bang
some French chicks or what, huh?
177
00:07:05,992 --> 00:07:07,092
I don't know.
- Come on.
178
00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:08,560
Shantz, I don't know, man.
179
00:07:08,561 --> 00:07:10,596
I really don't want to
screw shit up with Robin and me.
180
00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:13,499
Wow, you know, for a girl,
you got a lousy rack.
181
00:07:13,500 --> 00:07:14,900
Fuck you.
182
00:07:14,901 --> 00:07:16,635
Oh, hey, Robin.
183
00:07:16,636 --> 00:07:18,971
Hey, Shantz.
184
00:07:18,972 --> 00:07:20,773
Dave, are you going
to French with me?
185
00:07:22,709 --> 00:07:24,009
French with you?
186
00:07:27,781 --> 00:07:30,516
Class, French class.
187
00:07:30,517 --> 00:07:31,517
Right.
188
00:07:31,518 --> 00:07:32,985
Uh, no,
actually,
189
00:07:32,986 --> 00:07:34,687
I forgot to do my homework,
so I think I'm gonna skip.
190
00:07:34,688 --> 00:07:36,221
Oh.
- Yeah.
191
00:07:40,994 --> 00:07:44,496
So what are you ladies
doing tonight?
192
00:07:44,497 --> 00:07:46,832
Nothing, actually.
193
00:07:46,833 --> 00:07:47,833
What are you guys doing?
194
00:07:47,834 --> 00:07:48,834
Um, we're just--
195
00:07:48,835 --> 00:07:49,835
Jay's house.
- Yup.
196
00:07:49,836 --> 00:07:50,936
Love for the foreigners.
197
00:07:50,937 --> 00:07:51,937
All right?
Be there.
198
00:07:51,938 --> 00:07:53,405
Awesome.
199
00:07:53,406 --> 00:07:54,807
You two should wear
something low-cut
200
00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:56,141
and easy to remove, okay?
201
00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:58,711
Obviously, I'm gonna kill Jay
for not telling me sooner.
202
00:07:58,712 --> 00:08:00,412
I got to go get me
an outfit.
203
00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:02,247
Okay, so I'll see you tonight.
204
00:08:02,248 --> 00:08:04,350
Yeah, I'll see you tonight.
205
00:08:05,752 --> 00:08:08,354
I love you.
206
00:08:08,355 --> 00:08:09,355
Ball check.
207
00:08:09,356 --> 00:08:10,823
Oh, fuck.
208
00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:12,324
Did you just--
- Jesus Christ.
209
00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:13,759
Did you just say
"I love you"?
210
00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:15,694
The fuck's
the matter with you?
211
00:08:15,695 --> 00:08:19,131
Hey, let me remind you about
who you are to Robin, okay?
212
00:08:19,132 --> 00:08:21,800
No nooky, no ass,
no poontang, no booty,
213
00:08:21,801 --> 00:08:23,736
no sweet, supple vagina,
214
00:08:23,737 --> 00:08:25,504
no bobbin' on the knob
like corn on the cob,
215
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:28,007
no getting your pee-pee wet,
no skin flute symphony,
216
00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:30,309
no labia lip-lock,
no beatin' the guts,
217
00:08:30,310 --> 00:08:32,544
no cervix sucker punch,
no mushroom massage,
218
00:08:32,545 --> 00:08:35,014
no mouth hug,
no long stride lefty,
219
00:08:35,015 --> 00:08:37,182
you know, if you were
a little crooked like me,
220
00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:38,417
no spraying the swimmers--
221
00:08:38,418 --> 00:08:40,185
All right, Shantz, Shantz,
shut the fuck up.
222
00:08:40,186 --> 00:08:41,487
I get it,
Jesus Christ.
223
00:08:41,488 --> 00:08:42,755
Fuck, my stomach.
224
00:08:42,756 --> 00:08:45,724
Look, I'm just trying
to make a point, Dave, okay?
225
00:08:45,725 --> 00:08:47,326
It's senior year.
226
00:08:47,327 --> 00:08:48,927
I ask you again,
227
00:08:48,928 --> 00:08:50,996
when are finally gonna get
your little in the middle?
228
00:08:50,997 --> 00:08:52,931
I don't know,
all right?
229
00:08:52,932 --> 00:08:54,533
Look, all I know is,
when it happens,
230
00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:56,368
I want it to be perfect,
okay?
231
00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:59,138
I want there to be fireworks
and Marvin Gaye playing,
232
00:08:59,139 --> 00:09:00,839
and most importantly,
233
00:09:00,840 --> 00:09:02,307
I want it to be with Robin,
okay?
234
00:09:02,308 --> 00:09:04,610
Look, you got to
forget about Robin.
235
00:09:04,611 --> 00:09:07,546
Forget about her.
236
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,648
Mia Ho.
237
00:09:09,649 --> 00:09:12,151
Mia Ho is the way to go.
238
00:09:12,152 --> 00:09:14,053
You know she wants it.
239
00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:15,888
And that Asian pussy
is so tight,
240
00:09:15,889 --> 00:09:20,025
it'll make even
that little pecker feel big.
241
00:09:20,026 --> 00:09:21,860
You know what, you're a bitch,
but you're right.
242
00:09:21,861 --> 00:09:23,529
I know you're just
looking out for me, man.
243
00:09:23,530 --> 00:09:25,531
I'm sorry about that, dude.
- Thank you, thank you.
244
00:09:25,532 --> 00:09:26,799
I'm sorry, man.
245
00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:28,233
Why is there
a poster of you up there?
246
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:29,234
What?
247
00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:30,235
Oh!
248
00:09:30,236 --> 00:09:31,770
You're a dick.
249
00:09:31,771 --> 00:09:33,739
Principle Lonnatini, you--
250
00:09:33,740 --> 00:09:35,174
you really like bush,
251
00:09:35,175 --> 00:09:36,175
don't you?
252
00:09:36,176 --> 00:09:38,177
Yes, yes, I--
253
00:09:38,178 --> 00:09:39,712
I love bush.
254
00:09:39,713 --> 00:09:42,981
I mean, wow,
you really, really love bush
255
00:09:42,982 --> 00:09:43,982
don't you?
256
00:09:43,983 --> 00:09:46,251
Yes, I do.
257
00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:50,589
As much as I love bush,
I prefer a nice landing strip.
258
00:09:52,325 --> 00:09:54,226
A good shave
is always nice.
259
00:09:59,032 --> 00:10:00,933
You mean like a Brazilian wax?
260
00:10:02,869 --> 00:10:03,869
What?
261
00:10:03,870 --> 00:10:05,437
Did she just say that?
262
00:10:09,075 --> 00:10:10,809
God damn you.
263
00:10:10,810 --> 00:10:12,277
You know, this is exactly
264
00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:14,913
why I brought you all in here.
265
00:10:14,914 --> 00:10:19,885
Your complete lack of respect
for anything important
266
00:10:19,886 --> 00:10:20,919
is an insult
267
00:10:20,920 --> 00:10:23,989
to every natural-born American.
268
00:10:23,990 --> 00:10:27,559
I know you may want to coast
through your last semester
269
00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:31,397
like the worthless
little parasites that you are,
270
00:10:31,398 --> 00:10:33,932
suckling on the teat
271
00:10:33,933 --> 00:10:37,469
of this United States
government-funded institution.
272
00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:40,706
You remind me
of an itchy little rash
273
00:10:40,707 --> 00:10:43,509
that you get one night
under the bleachers
274
00:10:43,510 --> 00:10:46,612
with your dress
pulled over your head
275
00:10:46,613 --> 00:10:51,250
and all your classmates yelling,
"Katie Rottencrotch!"
276
00:10:51,251 --> 00:10:53,352
Rottencrotch?
277
00:10:54,421 --> 00:10:56,221
Those wounds never heal.
278
00:10:57,290 --> 00:11:00,826
But this is a beautiful school,
279
00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:03,662
full of beautiful Americans
that shower every day,
280
00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:05,764
and they don't speak
any other language
281
00:11:05,765 --> 00:11:09,835
but good old-fashioned
American English.
282
00:11:09,836 --> 00:11:12,271
You know, I don't know
who I want in this school less,
283
00:11:12,272 --> 00:11:14,907
you four
284
00:11:14,908 --> 00:11:18,344
or those burrito-munching
sand turds.
285
00:11:18,345 --> 00:11:19,745
I have spent
286
00:11:19,746 --> 00:11:23,549
my entire life being pro-life,
287
00:11:23,550 --> 00:11:26,452
but I'm rethinking it now.
288
00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:28,587
Get out.
289
00:11:31,858 --> 00:11:34,059
Hashbrown,
290
00:11:34,060 --> 00:11:35,994
are you with us on this problem?
291
00:11:35,995 --> 00:11:37,496
Uh, yeah, yeah, sure.
292
00:11:37,497 --> 00:11:39,832
Good, well, then I'm sure
you wouldn't mind
293
00:11:39,833 --> 00:11:41,400
coming up
to help us out with it.
294
00:11:43,169 --> 00:11:44,169
Word.
295
00:11:52,746 --> 00:11:54,546
You skipped a grade, right, son?
296
00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:56,548
Two actually.
297
00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:58,283
I have a lot of friends
at M.I.T.
298
00:11:58,284 --> 00:12:00,252
I'll put the good word
in for you if you want.
299
00:12:00,253 --> 00:12:02,788
Actually, I'm going to State,
but thank you anyway.
300
00:12:02,789 --> 00:12:04,857
State?
You're better than that.
301
00:12:08,061 --> 00:12:10,062
Think about it.
302
00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:12,531
So, Chelsea, you coming
to my party tonight?
303
00:12:12,532 --> 00:12:14,066
I don't know.
304
00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:15,801
Well, if you don't come,
305
00:12:15,802 --> 00:12:16,802
I can't come.
306
00:12:16,803 --> 00:12:18,103
It's your party, Jay.
307
00:12:18,104 --> 00:12:19,738
Wouldn't you come anyway?
308
00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:22,641
Probably,
309
00:12:22,642 --> 00:12:25,744
but if you come,
I am guaranteed
310
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:27,112
to come.
311
00:12:27,113 --> 00:12:28,647
Well, I want to come.
312
00:12:28,648 --> 00:12:29,815
Who doesn't want to come?
313
00:12:29,816 --> 00:12:31,450
Great, but it's not that easy
314
00:12:31,451 --> 00:12:32,685
for me to just come.
315
00:12:32,686 --> 00:12:34,720
There's a lot of work
to be done
316
00:12:34,721 --> 00:12:36,689
before I can just come.
317
00:12:36,690 --> 00:12:38,357
We can do that work together.
318
00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:42,061
I'm just saying, you coming
will definitely
319
00:12:42,062 --> 00:12:44,129
make me come without a doubt.
320
00:12:44,130 --> 00:12:47,733
Even if I just heard you
say the words,
321
00:12:47,734 --> 00:12:49,702
"Jay, I'm coming,"
322
00:12:49,703 --> 00:12:51,770
that alone would probably
make me come.
323
00:12:51,771 --> 00:12:54,206
Well, maybe I'll come.
324
00:12:54,207 --> 00:12:56,642
Maybe you will,
but from what I hear,
325
00:12:56,643 --> 00:12:59,578
that's more up to the girl
than it is the guy.
326
00:13:00,580 --> 00:13:01,714
What?
327
00:13:01,715 --> 00:13:03,015
Nothing.
328
00:13:03,016 --> 00:13:06,852
So, you coming?
329
00:13:06,853 --> 00:13:08,754
Oh, I'm coming.
330
00:13:21,468 --> 00:13:22,468
Push it more.
331
00:13:22,469 --> 00:13:23,602
Five more.
332
00:13:23,603 --> 00:13:25,204
Five more.
You're looking swollen.
333
00:13:25,205 --> 00:13:27,473
Yes.
334
00:13:27,474 --> 00:13:29,842
Hey, Shantz, you want
to hop in here and get a set?
335
00:13:29,843 --> 00:13:31,010
We can always use a third cock.
336
00:13:31,011 --> 00:13:33,012
Damn it.
337
00:13:33,013 --> 00:13:35,014
I got to graduate
with a 2.3 average
338
00:13:35,015 --> 00:13:36,015
to get the scholarship.
339
00:13:36,016 --> 00:13:37,049
Big deal, man.
340
00:13:37,050 --> 00:13:39,752
Dude, you know
I have, like, a 1.9.
341
00:13:39,753 --> 00:13:42,454
A little help.
A little help.
342
00:13:42,455 --> 00:13:44,023
So her sister stumbles in,
and I'm like,
343
00:13:44,024 --> 00:13:47,192
"bitch, you wake him up,
you keep him up."
344
00:13:47,193 --> 00:13:48,193
No.
345
00:13:48,194 --> 00:13:49,328
It's true.
346
00:13:49,329 --> 00:13:50,996
Hey, did I mention
she was a college chick?
347
00:13:50,997 --> 00:13:52,398
See, shit like that
is gonna happen
348
00:13:52,399 --> 00:13:53,399
every day at State.
349
00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:56,435
The fantastic fornicating four.
350
00:13:56,436 --> 00:13:58,003
Hey, guys,
I got a problem.
351
00:13:58,004 --> 00:14:01,040
We know, Shantz,
but herpes is not treatable.
352
00:14:01,041 --> 00:14:02,041
Shut up, jerk-off.
353
00:14:02,042 --> 00:14:03,676
I can still kick your ass.
354
00:14:03,677 --> 00:14:05,110
Touch�.
355
00:14:05,111 --> 00:14:07,046
Look, it might only be
the three amigos.
356
00:14:07,047 --> 00:14:09,481
I got to get my GPA up to a 2.3,
or I don't get in.
357
00:14:09,482 --> 00:14:10,616
That's some shit.
358
00:14:10,617 --> 00:14:13,652
Dude, Shantz,
you've got to be joking me.
359
00:14:13,653 --> 00:14:15,421
In other words,
it's a sure thing, slam dunk.
360
00:14:15,422 --> 00:14:18,090
I'm never gonna make it.
361
00:14:18,091 --> 00:14:19,892
That's almost straight "A"s.
362
00:14:19,893 --> 00:14:21,994
That's all "A"s
and a B-plus.
363
00:14:21,995 --> 00:14:24,730
You're screwed
and not in a good way.
364
00:14:24,731 --> 00:14:26,398
No, uh-uh.
365
00:14:26,399 --> 00:14:27,933
We got to have faith, man.
366
00:14:27,934 --> 00:14:29,702
Look, this is
what we've always wanted
367
00:14:29,703 --> 00:14:30,903
since we were kids,
all right?
368
00:14:30,904 --> 00:14:32,971
We're going to State
together.
369
00:14:32,972 --> 00:14:35,274
Dave, Shantz, my man,
don't you worry.
370
00:14:35,275 --> 00:14:36,742
From now on,
I will do all your papers,
371
00:14:36,743 --> 00:14:37,743
and no more "B"s.
372
00:14:37,744 --> 00:14:38,744
We'll get you there.
373
00:14:38,745 --> 00:14:39,978
Thanks, man.
374
00:14:39,979 --> 00:14:42,114
You know, I could probably
get my hands and some tests,
375
00:14:42,115 --> 00:14:43,582
have Hashbrown
fill them out for you.
376
00:14:43,583 --> 00:14:45,017
We'll make it happen.
- Thanks, guys.
377
00:14:45,018 --> 00:14:46,185
We'd never leave you hangin',
bro.
378
00:14:46,186 --> 00:14:49,321
Next year, we'll be living up
the college life
379
00:14:49,322 --> 00:14:51,724
with fuckin' titties
and just drinking--
380
00:14:51,725 --> 00:14:53,425
You smell that?
381
00:14:53,426 --> 00:14:55,194
Smells like three-legged deer,
fellas.
382
00:14:55,195 --> 00:14:56,729
Three-legged deer?
383
00:14:56,730 --> 00:14:57,930
Easy prey.
384
00:14:57,931 --> 00:14:59,264
Oh, right, right,
I get it.
385
00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:07,573
Anita?
386
00:15:07,574 --> 00:15:08,874
Si.
387
00:15:08,875 --> 00:15:10,709
You must be Jake.
388
00:15:10,710 --> 00:15:11,810
It's a pleasure
to meet you.
389
00:15:11,811 --> 00:15:13,312
Nice to meet you.
390
00:15:13,313 --> 00:15:14,747
Hey, guys,
this is Anita.
391
00:15:14,748 --> 00:15:16,281
She's from Brazil.
392
00:15:16,282 --> 00:15:18,684
So do you speak Brazilian,
or...
393
00:15:18,685 --> 00:15:20,119
Mexican?
394
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:21,286
Spanish.
395
00:15:21,287 --> 00:15:22,488
Portuguese.
396
00:15:22,489 --> 00:15:25,057
Oh, I failed geology.
397
00:15:25,058 --> 00:15:26,859
Nice to meet you.
398
00:15:26,860 --> 00:15:29,895
Nice to meet you.
399
00:15:29,896 --> 00:15:32,164
Good morning, Gordon.
400
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:35,434
Listen, Drago,
it's Shantz, man,
401
00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:37,102
Shantz, Shantz.
402
00:15:37,103 --> 00:15:38,671
Okay?
403
00:15:38,672 --> 00:15:39,938
What do we call you?
404
00:15:39,939 --> 00:15:41,740
Emelianenko Tronovsky.
405
00:15:42,909 --> 00:15:43,909
A million ankles?
406
00:15:43,910 --> 00:15:45,411
Emelianenko.
407
00:15:45,412 --> 00:15:46,712
Mil--
408
00:15:48,048 --> 00:15:49,148
Screw it.
409
00:15:49,149 --> 00:15:52,284
We're gonna call you
Russian Dude, okay?
410
00:15:52,285 --> 00:15:53,318
Is that cool?
- Da.
411
00:15:53,319 --> 00:15:55,020
Come meet the crew,
Russian Dude.
412
00:15:56,990 --> 00:15:59,124
Hello, you must be--
413
00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:00,125
Hashbrown, man.
414
00:16:00,126 --> 00:16:01,460
Nice to meet you, Ganja.
415
00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:03,796
Actually, it is Gan-ya.
416
00:16:03,797 --> 00:16:06,065
Yeah, that's what I said.
417
00:16:07,300 --> 00:16:08,634
Okay.
418
00:16:09,903 --> 00:16:11,670
Hi, bonjour.
419
00:16:11,671 --> 00:16:14,106
Which one of you
is Laurent?
420
00:16:14,107 --> 00:16:16,241
Oh, no, I'm Sophie.
421
00:16:16,242 --> 00:16:18,944
Oui, oui, Laurent.
422
00:16:18,945 --> 00:16:20,779
Yes, Laurent.
423
00:16:20,780 --> 00:16:21,980
Is she on the bus still?
424
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,682
No, no, I am--
425
00:16:23,683 --> 00:16:26,819
me, I am Laurent.
426
00:16:26,820 --> 00:16:28,887
You're--
427
00:16:28,888 --> 00:16:32,458
Um, I think we're having
a miscommunication actually.
428
00:16:32,459 --> 00:16:34,093
You see, you're a guy,
429
00:16:34,094 --> 00:16:35,327
and my foreign exchange student
430
00:16:35,328 --> 00:16:37,096
this hot blond
from France named
431
00:16:37,097 --> 00:16:38,530
Laurent.
432
00:16:38,531 --> 00:16:43,535
And plays soccer
and has a girlfriend.
433
00:16:43,536 --> 00:16:45,704
Fuck.
434
00:16:45,705 --> 00:16:46,939
You're the guy in the picture,
435
00:16:46,940 --> 00:16:49,308
huh, not the girl?
436
00:16:49,309 --> 00:16:52,378
Well, you are Dave, eh?
437
00:16:52,379 --> 00:16:53,612
That's me.
438
00:16:55,415 --> 00:16:58,450
Besides yourself, Dave,
do you know where I can find
439
00:16:58,451 --> 00:17:01,553
some American virgins?
440
00:17:01,554 --> 00:17:04,423
Uh, no, no, I don't.
441
00:17:04,424 --> 00:17:05,591
That's okay.
442
00:17:05,592 --> 00:17:06,825
I will find them.
443
00:17:06,826 --> 00:17:08,327
So, Anita,
444
00:17:08,328 --> 00:17:10,362
why did you come
to America?
445
00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:11,730
I come to study.
446
00:17:11,731 --> 00:17:15,367
In Brazil, there is only so much
you can learn about America.
447
00:17:15,368 --> 00:17:19,238
But to really learn
the economics,
448
00:17:19,239 --> 00:17:23,676
the psychology, the politics,
you must live in the country.
449
00:17:23,677 --> 00:17:28,047
Well, I will teach you
everything you need to know.
450
00:17:28,048 --> 00:17:29,248
Hey, Mom.
451
00:17:29,249 --> 00:17:33,819
Oh, honey,
they're here.
452
00:17:33,820 --> 00:17:35,788
Hello,
my name is Laurent.
453
00:17:35,789 --> 00:17:37,523
It is truly an honor
to meet you.
454
00:17:37,524 --> 00:17:40,959
Oh--okey dokey.
455
00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:42,094
Uh, boys--
456
00:17:42,095 --> 00:17:45,831
Dave, do you want to show
Laurent to his room?
457
00:17:45,832 --> 00:17:46,999
Yeah, sounds great.
458
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:49,468
Okay, Laurent,
to the east wing over here,
459
00:17:49,469 --> 00:17:50,936
we have the ballroom.
460
00:17:50,937 --> 00:17:53,105
Down here to the left,
we have an invisible leprechaun.
461
00:17:53,106 --> 00:17:55,507
It's been there for years.
462
00:17:55,508 --> 00:17:57,910
And this guys,
according to the paperwork,
463
00:17:57,911 --> 00:17:59,011
that's my father.
464
00:17:59,012 --> 00:18:00,012
Hello.
465
00:18:00,013 --> 00:18:01,013
Laurent.
466
00:18:01,014 --> 00:18:03,148
Oui, Laurent.
467
00:18:03,149 --> 00:18:04,583
Welcome to America.
- Thank you.
468
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:05,684
It's nice to have you.
469
00:18:05,685 --> 00:18:08,187
Just stay as long as you like.
470
00:18:08,188 --> 00:18:09,488
Let's not get crazy, pops.
471
00:18:09,489 --> 00:18:11,657
All right, anyway,
so moving on,
472
00:18:11,658 --> 00:18:14,993
down here to the right
is your bedroom.
473
00:18:14,994 --> 00:18:16,662
I think he's gay.
474
00:18:21,634 --> 00:18:24,269
So what's this thing?
475
00:18:24,270 --> 00:18:26,939
Amorita.
476
00:18:26,940 --> 00:18:30,409
She's the goddess of love.
477
00:18:30,410 --> 00:18:31,410
My culture says,
478
00:18:31,411 --> 00:18:33,145
if you keep her with you
wherever you go,
479
00:18:33,146 --> 00:18:37,282
you will eventually meet
the one you're destined for.
480
00:18:37,283 --> 00:18:38,917
Oh, yeah?
481
00:18:38,918 --> 00:18:41,720
Well, my culture says,
if at first you don't succeed,
482
00:18:41,721 --> 00:18:45,591
try and try
and try again.
483
00:18:45,592 --> 00:18:50,829
I think our cultures
are a little different.
484
00:18:50,830 --> 00:18:54,233
You are what they call a player,
aren't you?
485
00:18:54,234 --> 00:18:56,268
Pero amore.
486
00:18:56,269 --> 00:18:58,137
Have you ever had a girlfriend?
487
00:18:58,138 --> 00:18:59,138
Sure.
488
00:18:59,139 --> 00:19:00,939
I had two just last week.
489
00:19:04,077 --> 00:19:05,077
Will you excuse me?
490
00:19:05,078 --> 00:19:06,245
I'd like to finish unpacking.
491
00:19:06,246 --> 00:19:08,213
Whatever floats it.
492
00:19:08,214 --> 00:19:11,183
But in the states,
a tight skirt works a lot better
493
00:19:11,184 --> 00:19:13,185
than that troll.
494
00:19:13,186 --> 00:19:14,119
Just so you know.
495
00:19:21,294 --> 00:19:22,327
Delish, Mom.
496
00:19:22,328 --> 00:19:24,596
We really hate to eat
and have the runs,
497
00:19:24,597 --> 00:19:25,898
but seriously we really got
498
00:19:25,899 --> 00:19:27,499
to take this show on the road,
little lady.
499
00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:30,169
Now, Dave,
your mother is no lady.
500
00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:31,470
Marv.
501
00:19:31,471 --> 00:19:33,472
Yo!
502
00:19:33,473 --> 00:19:35,040
You people hear
the damn doorbell, huh?
503
00:19:35,041 --> 00:19:36,308
Oh, Gordon.
504
00:19:36,309 --> 00:19:37,643
Well, I never.
505
00:19:37,644 --> 00:19:39,178
Oh, never say never,
Mrs. L.
506
00:19:39,179 --> 00:19:40,579
I'll lay some pipe around here.
507
00:19:40,580 --> 00:19:42,147
Huh?
508
00:19:43,783 --> 00:19:45,784
Look, I'm sorry, pops,
509
00:19:45,785 --> 00:19:46,952
but we really got to go.
510
00:19:46,953 --> 00:19:48,420
We don't want to be late
for the party.
511
00:19:48,421 --> 00:19:50,989
Yeah, what's going on
at this party, Dave?
512
00:19:50,990 --> 00:19:52,491
Just some harmless fun.
513
00:19:52,492 --> 00:19:53,559
You know, a bunch of friends
514
00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:55,160
getting together
to play some games,
515
00:19:55,161 --> 00:19:57,229
like donkey punch.
516
00:19:57,230 --> 00:19:58,831
Donkey punch?
517
00:19:58,832 --> 00:20:00,099
Like pin the tail?
518
00:20:00,100 --> 00:20:01,433
Yeah, yeah,
something like that.
519
00:20:01,434 --> 00:20:02,501
Oh, wow.
520
00:20:02,502 --> 00:20:04,503
Yeah, and we also play
this one called
521
00:20:04,504 --> 00:20:05,771
the rusty trombone.
522
00:20:05,772 --> 00:20:06,772
It's great.
523
00:20:06,773 --> 00:20:07,973
Yeah, I'll teach you sometime.
524
00:20:07,974 --> 00:20:09,308
Okay.
Definitely, definitely.
525
00:20:09,309 --> 00:20:10,309
It's great.
526
00:20:10,310 --> 00:20:11,710
What was the one
we played last week
527
00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:14,646
with that--
oh, Dirty Sanchez.
528
00:20:14,647 --> 00:20:17,116
It takes a while to learn,
but it's great.
529
00:20:17,117 --> 00:20:18,851
Boys, boys,
530
00:20:18,852 --> 00:20:24,356
have you ever played
the Pittsburgh Platter Frenchman?
531
00:20:24,357 --> 00:20:26,025
Huh?
532
00:20:26,026 --> 00:20:28,994
Or how about
the Filching Frenchman?
533
00:20:29,996 --> 00:20:31,497
Ooh, Marv.
534
00:20:31,498 --> 00:20:33,832
Educated man
your pops here.
535
00:20:33,833 --> 00:20:36,802
Ooh la la.
536
00:20:38,038 --> 00:20:39,038
All right,
we got to go.
537
00:20:39,039 --> 00:20:40,272
Hashbrown's in the car.
538
00:20:40,273 --> 00:20:41,373
Adios, Marv.
539
00:20:41,374 --> 00:20:42,374
Be good, all right.
540
00:20:42,375 --> 00:20:46,779
Uh, Dave, listen.
541
00:20:46,780 --> 00:20:50,516
A nice clean coat of paint
542
00:20:50,517 --> 00:20:53,819
doesn't necessarily mean
the car is new.
543
00:20:54,988 --> 00:20:57,489
You know
what I'm saying?
544
00:20:57,490 --> 00:20:59,425
Yo, yo, yo!
545
00:20:59,426 --> 00:21:00,592
Hey, nice getup,
douche bag.
546
00:21:00,593 --> 00:21:01,593
Is it Gay Jay Day?
547
00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:02,761
Yes, sir.
548
00:21:02,762 --> 00:21:04,430
Hey, you got anything
that can play this?
549
00:21:04,431 --> 00:21:05,431
Absolutely.
- Uh-uh.
550
00:21:05,432 --> 00:21:06,699
Come on.
551
00:21:06,700 --> 00:21:08,367
Hey, Jiminy Cricket,
how's it going?
552
00:21:08,368 --> 00:21:09,635
Okay, all right.
553
00:21:09,636 --> 00:21:10,636
Whoo! What's going on?
554
00:21:10,637 --> 00:21:11,837
Up top
who's gay.
555
00:21:11,838 --> 00:21:13,272
You? Got you.
That's what I thought.
556
00:21:13,273 --> 00:21:14,606
Hey, you hear about
that volcano?
557
00:21:15,608 --> 00:21:18,043
That's what
I'm talking about.
558
00:21:18,044 --> 00:21:19,845
I'm sorry about that.
559
00:21:19,846 --> 00:21:21,080
Hey, what's up?
560
00:21:21,081 --> 00:21:22,648
Dude, wanted out back.
561
00:21:22,649 --> 00:21:23,882
Why don't you guys go ahead,
562
00:21:23,883 --> 00:21:26,985
and we'll meet up with you
in a little bit.
563
00:21:26,986 --> 00:21:28,887
Hey, want to meet
a friend of mine?
564
00:21:28,888 --> 00:21:31,156
Ooh, is she
a girlfriend, yeah?
565
00:21:31,157 --> 00:21:33,492
Uh, more of just
a normal friend.
566
00:21:33,493 --> 00:21:35,194
Ah, a normal friend.
567
00:21:35,195 --> 00:21:37,629
Perhaps your normal friend
is up for some screwing, eh?
568
00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:39,798
Whoa, whoa, whoa, what?
569
00:21:39,799 --> 00:21:41,533
You know, Dave,
the screw.
570
00:21:41,534 --> 00:21:43,769
No, no, no, I got--
I got what you were saying,
571
00:21:43,770 --> 00:21:46,372
but listen,
Robin's not like that, okay?
572
00:21:46,373 --> 00:21:47,673
She's a good girl.
573
00:21:47,674 --> 00:21:49,174
She's not like these hos.
574
00:21:49,175 --> 00:21:51,443
If you miss this next shot,
you have to drink
575
00:21:51,444 --> 00:21:53,445
that entire pitcher of beer.
576
00:21:53,446 --> 00:21:54,546
Ooh!
577
00:21:54,547 --> 00:21:57,549
Oh, you want to up the ante.
578
00:21:58,718 --> 00:21:59,718
Yeah,
579
00:21:59,719 --> 00:22:01,053
we'll take that challenge.
580
00:22:01,054 --> 00:22:05,824
But if I make this next shot,
the next thing you girls lose
581
00:22:05,825 --> 00:22:06,825
is your shirts.
582
00:22:06,826 --> 00:22:07,860
Whoo!
583
00:22:07,861 --> 00:22:09,428
Okay, Jay.
584
00:22:09,429 --> 00:22:12,798
But haven't you already
seen mine before?
585
00:22:12,799 --> 00:22:13,832
And mine?
586
00:22:13,833 --> 00:22:15,067
Yes.
587
00:22:15,068 --> 00:22:17,803
Hey, I'm just giving the people
what they want.
588
00:22:22,142 --> 00:22:23,776
Well, come on.
- Do it.
589
00:22:25,278 --> 00:22:27,579
Tits! Tits! Tits!
590
00:22:27,580 --> 00:22:29,448
Show us the hand warmers.
591
00:22:33,720 --> 00:22:35,721
I have toilet!
592
00:22:35,722 --> 00:22:38,657
I have toilet!
593
00:22:38,658 --> 00:22:41,460
Oh, good morning,
American girls.
594
00:22:45,699 --> 00:22:48,367
Hey, listen,
don't be a French asshole, okay?
595
00:22:48,368 --> 00:22:51,503
Me? Never, Dave.
596
00:22:51,504 --> 00:22:52,504
Hey.
597
00:22:52,505 --> 00:22:55,274
How are you?
- Good.
598
00:22:55,275 --> 00:22:56,442
Um, sorry.
599
00:22:56,443 --> 00:22:57,643
Laurent, this is Robin.
600
00:22:57,644 --> 00:22:59,478
Robin, this is
my exchange student, Laurent.
601
00:22:59,479 --> 00:23:01,413
Hi.
602
00:23:05,118 --> 00:23:07,052
Thank you.
603
00:23:08,188 --> 00:23:10,189
He's from France.
604
00:23:10,190 --> 00:23:11,190
That's awesome.
605
00:23:11,191 --> 00:23:12,191
Yeah.
606
00:23:12,192 --> 00:23:13,359
You have nice friends,
Dave.
607
00:23:13,360 --> 00:23:14,693
Thank you.
608
00:23:16,930 --> 00:23:20,099
And that's how you get
free cable for life.
609
00:23:22,702 --> 00:23:24,536
Hashbrown,
I'm not feeling anything.
610
00:23:24,537 --> 00:23:26,739
Dude, you never get high
611
00:23:26,740 --> 00:23:28,007
the first time.
612
00:23:28,008 --> 00:23:31,076
Take it from the Dalai Lama
of marijuana, pal.
613
00:23:32,078 --> 00:23:34,179
Third time's the charm.
614
00:23:34,180 --> 00:23:35,247
Have some more, man.
615
00:23:35,248 --> 00:23:36,248
Really?
616
00:23:36,249 --> 00:23:37,516
It's true, man.
617
00:23:37,517 --> 00:23:40,052
It took me four times, man,
618
00:23:40,053 --> 00:23:41,553
and when I finally got high--
619
00:23:41,554 --> 00:23:43,822
let's just put it this way.
620
00:23:43,823 --> 00:23:48,093
Do not ever have
your passport on you.
621
00:23:50,196 --> 00:23:54,266
All right, Ganja, here's
a new American word for you:
622
00:23:54,267 --> 00:23:55,768
Munchies.
623
00:23:55,769 --> 00:23:57,002
Munchies.
624
00:23:57,003 --> 00:23:58,003
Munchies.
625
00:23:58,004 --> 00:23:59,938
Munchies.
626
00:23:59,939 --> 00:24:02,207
I am gonna introduce you girlies
to the Loch Ness Monster.
627
00:24:02,208 --> 00:24:04,343
Have you ever heard of
the Loch Ness Monster, huh?
628
00:24:04,344 --> 00:24:05,377
Shantz, where's Dave?
629
00:24:05,378 --> 00:24:07,312
I can tell you
where he's not.
630
00:24:07,313 --> 00:24:08,714
He's not with two chicks
right now,
631
00:24:08,715 --> 00:24:09,748
but I am.
632
00:24:09,749 --> 00:24:12,251
Get the hell out of my way, ho.
633
00:24:12,252 --> 00:24:13,452
Damn it.
634
00:24:13,453 --> 00:24:16,188
Now, how do you say
menage a trois
635
00:24:16,189 --> 00:24:18,323
in your France language?
636
00:24:18,324 --> 00:24:20,159
I will never look
at the Eiffel Tower
637
00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:21,293
the same way again.
638
00:24:21,294 --> 00:24:24,463
I know.
That's why they built it.
639
00:24:24,464 --> 00:24:26,498
You know, my parents
once took me to Paris.
640
00:24:26,499 --> 00:24:27,733
Where did you say
you were from?
641
00:24:27,734 --> 00:24:28,734
Paris.
642
00:24:28,735 --> 00:24:29,735
I love Paris.
643
00:24:29,736 --> 00:24:30,803
There are great clubs there
644
00:24:30,804 --> 00:24:34,006
where I go to hit on
sexy American women.
645
00:24:34,007 --> 00:24:36,308
I went--
I visited Paris, Texas,
646
00:24:36,309 --> 00:24:38,510
one time to visit
some relatives, yeah.
647
00:24:38,511 --> 00:24:39,812
My uncle has a club foot.
648
00:24:39,813 --> 00:24:41,380
It's not very sexy at all.
649
00:24:54,961 --> 00:24:57,396
Oh, Laurent, you are
so much more of a man than Dave.
650
00:24:57,397 --> 00:25:00,899
Dave is such a pussy.
651
00:25:00,900 --> 00:25:01,934
Toss my salad.
652
00:25:01,935 --> 00:25:03,736
I would dip the sauce
all day.
653
00:25:10,176 --> 00:25:11,343
Hi, Dave.
654
00:25:11,344 --> 00:25:13,178
I've been looking
all over for you.
655
00:25:13,179 --> 00:25:14,546
I'm so glad that you're here.
656
00:25:14,547 --> 00:25:16,148
This is the coolest party,
and all the people are so cool.
657
00:25:16,149 --> 00:25:17,983
Well, not everyone because some
of the people are really stupid.
658
00:25:17,984 --> 00:25:18,984
But not you; you're cool.
659
00:25:18,985 --> 00:25:20,719
But you know that,
and I know that.
660
00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:22,654
This--oh, this one guy
in the back was throwing up.
661
00:25:22,655 --> 00:25:23,655
Mia,
662
00:25:23,656 --> 00:25:25,124
Why do you talk so much?
663
00:25:25,125 --> 00:25:27,626
Well, Dave, I guess I was trying
to make conversation, you know?
664
00:25:27,627 --> 00:25:30,195
Conversing conversationally
about conversational things
665
00:25:30,196 --> 00:25:33,032
like your converse.
666
00:25:33,033 --> 00:25:34,933
I like your shoes.
667
00:25:34,934 --> 00:25:36,268
I'll be right back.
668
00:25:38,638 --> 00:25:41,173
Robin?
669
00:25:41,174 --> 00:25:44,243
Toilet!
670
00:25:44,244 --> 00:25:46,879
It means, well,
the way to the soul
671
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:48,614
is through the eyes.
672
00:25:48,615 --> 00:25:51,183
The mouth is the way
to the heart.
673
00:25:51,184 --> 00:25:53,919
That's so interesting.
674
00:25:53,920 --> 00:25:55,521
I suck at French.
675
00:25:55,522 --> 00:25:57,790
I thought you said
something about "tie me up."
676
00:25:57,791 --> 00:25:59,558
It was beautiful.
677
00:25:59,559 --> 00:26:00,626
Come here, chicas.
678
00:26:00,627 --> 00:26:02,061
Don't be shy;
I won't bite.
679
00:26:04,164 --> 00:26:07,466
Ooh, owie, owie,
my knee is killing me.
680
00:26:07,467 --> 00:26:09,368
Would you mind just giving it
a rub, Sophie,
681
00:26:09,369 --> 00:26:10,669
a little massage?
682
00:26:10,670 --> 00:26:13,105
Massage on my way
683
00:26:13,106 --> 00:26:14,273
to the Loch Ness Monster.
684
00:26:14,274 --> 00:26:15,307
It's gonna get you.
685
00:26:16,843 --> 00:26:19,712
Ooh, smells like home,
doesn't it?
686
00:26:19,713 --> 00:26:21,046
What do you mean?
687
00:26:21,047 --> 00:26:22,748
France, it's smell--
688
00:26:22,749 --> 00:26:23,949
screw it.
689
00:26:23,950 --> 00:26:25,851
Anyways, you girls
want to get crazy or what?
690
00:26:25,852 --> 00:26:26,919
Oui, oui.
691
00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:29,421
Oh, there's nothing wee
about it, baby.
692
00:26:29,422 --> 00:26:31,323
I love France.
693
00:26:31,324 --> 00:26:32,825
My pants,
get 'em off.
694
00:26:34,194 --> 00:26:36,462
Toilet, toilet.
695
00:26:36,463 --> 00:26:38,230
Are you kidding me?
696
00:26:40,700 --> 00:26:41,867
No, no, no,
wait, wait, wait,
697
00:26:41,868 --> 00:26:43,302
stop, stop, stop, stop!
698
00:26:43,303 --> 00:26:45,437
I can't understand
a damn thing you're saying, bro!
699
00:26:45,438 --> 00:26:46,972
France, wait!
700
00:26:46,973 --> 00:26:49,575
Wait! Wait!
701
00:26:49,576 --> 00:26:52,811
I shit my pants.
702
00:26:58,585 --> 00:27:03,856
Oh, you spill on yourself,
but...
703
00:27:05,959 --> 00:27:08,694
Hey, why don't we go
take a walk?
704
00:27:08,695 --> 00:27:10,496
Oh, okay.
705
00:27:10,497 --> 00:27:11,597
Okay?
706
00:27:11,598 --> 00:27:12,931
I'm just gonna get
my purse.
707
00:27:12,932 --> 00:27:14,867
Of course.
708
00:27:19,839 --> 00:27:21,840
We're back
from our recon mission.
709
00:27:21,841 --> 00:27:23,375
Well done, guys.
710
00:27:25,812 --> 00:27:26,945
Stoner giggle.
711
00:27:38,324 --> 00:27:39,658
Jess, do you have
my purse?
712
00:27:39,659 --> 00:27:41,493
No, sorry,
I don't.
713
00:27:41,494 --> 00:27:43,062
Dave, you have my purse.
714
00:27:43,063 --> 00:27:44,063
Oh, yeah.
715
00:27:44,064 --> 00:27:46,465
You're such a lifesaver.
716
00:27:46,466 --> 00:27:48,233
So you and Laurent
717
00:27:48,234 --> 00:27:49,702
seem to be hitting it off
pretty well.
718
00:27:49,703 --> 00:27:51,737
Yeah, he's so cool.
719
00:27:51,738 --> 00:27:53,472
I'm really happy
he's living with you.
720
00:27:53,473 --> 00:27:55,808
Yeah, no,
he's super awesome.
721
00:27:55,809 --> 00:27:58,143
Yeah, he's cool;
his accent's cute.
722
00:27:58,144 --> 00:28:00,346
I don't think he knows
what he's saying half the time.
723
00:28:00,347 --> 00:28:01,647
We're going
on a walk actually.
724
00:28:01,648 --> 00:28:04,116
Okay.
725
00:28:04,117 --> 00:28:05,918
Laurent?
726
00:28:09,656 --> 00:28:12,591
Well, he really seems
to be enjoying America.
727
00:28:12,592 --> 00:28:14,426
Yeah.
728
00:28:18,865 --> 00:28:22,701
Would you like me
to walk you home?
729
00:28:22,702 --> 00:28:24,436
Yeah?
- Yeah.
730
00:28:24,437 --> 00:28:25,504
All right.
731
00:28:25,505 --> 00:28:26,505
I love France!
732
00:28:26,506 --> 00:28:27,506
I love it!
733
00:28:27,507 --> 00:28:28,507
I love France!
734
00:28:28,508 --> 00:28:29,608
Have you seen
the naked guy?
735
00:28:29,609 --> 00:28:31,510
My grandma lives
next door.
736
00:28:31,511 --> 00:28:32,978
Yeah, I saw that bastard
banging her.
737
00:28:34,347 --> 00:28:36,181
Hey, who's ready
for the Shantz sandwich, huh?
738
00:28:38,184 --> 00:28:39,718
And I'll be
the Jay-onaise.
739
00:28:39,719 --> 00:28:41,020
Yeah, Jay, come on.
740
00:28:45,759 --> 00:28:46,759
Up top, baby!
741
00:28:46,760 --> 00:28:47,726
Up top!
742
00:28:47,727 --> 00:28:49,261
Yes!
743
00:28:53,400 --> 00:28:55,868
This year is just flying by,
you know?
744
00:28:55,869 --> 00:28:57,102
I know.
You're right.
745
00:28:57,103 --> 00:28:58,971
Now we got the dance
coming up here soon,
746
00:28:58,972 --> 00:29:03,542
and then, what,
graduation right after that.
747
00:29:03,543 --> 00:29:06,145
Look, I know it's coming up
really soon and everything,
748
00:29:06,146 --> 00:29:10,849
but who are you going
to the dance with?
749
00:29:10,850 --> 00:29:13,919
Nobody.
750
00:29:13,920 --> 00:29:16,855
Cool.
751
00:29:16,856 --> 00:29:17,990
Hey, look.
752
00:29:17,991 --> 00:29:19,358
Remember that?
753
00:29:19,359 --> 00:29:21,493
We spent hours
on that dumb thing.
754
00:29:21,494 --> 00:29:22,661
It wasn't dumb, Dave.
755
00:29:22,662 --> 00:29:24,663
It was fun.
756
00:29:24,664 --> 00:29:25,564
That's where we met.
757
00:29:25,565 --> 00:29:27,132
Yup.
758
00:29:27,133 --> 00:29:28,600
All right, come on.
759
00:29:28,601 --> 00:29:29,868
For old time's sake.
760
00:29:29,869 --> 00:29:30,869
I don't know.
761
00:29:30,870 --> 00:29:32,104
You know,
it's no Eiffel Tower.
762
00:29:32,105 --> 00:29:33,105
Don't be a dick.
763
00:29:33,106 --> 00:29:34,106
I know.
764
00:29:34,107 --> 00:29:35,307
What was I thinking?
765
00:29:35,308 --> 00:29:37,810
Well, he's French.
766
00:29:37,811 --> 00:29:39,712
You know, he's cute,
plays soccer.
767
00:29:39,713 --> 00:29:40,946
You sound like
a perfect match.
768
00:29:40,947 --> 00:29:42,815
Shut up.
769
00:29:42,816 --> 00:29:46,251
If we want to be moving
monetarily towards a surplus,
770
00:29:46,252 --> 00:29:50,689
it's not a question of morals.
771
00:29:50,690 --> 00:29:52,491
It's a question
of what's fiscal favorable.
772
00:29:52,492 --> 00:29:57,329
The U.S. Government can't afford
to not tax marijuana.
773
00:29:57,330 --> 00:29:57,830
Salty...
774
00:29:59,499 --> 00:30:01,066
or sweet.
775
00:30:01,067 --> 00:30:02,501
I got it.
776
00:30:02,502 --> 00:30:03,335
Both.
777
00:30:04,838 --> 00:30:06,839
Chocolate-covered jerky.
778
00:30:08,742 --> 00:30:11,310
What is jerky?
779
00:30:11,311 --> 00:30:12,845
That's beef, man.
780
00:30:14,948 --> 00:30:16,315
Don't waste it.
781
00:30:16,316 --> 00:30:18,283
I mean, there's still
good jerky on there, man.
782
00:30:18,284 --> 00:30:20,919
So have you put
any more thought
783
00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:22,654
into going to "O" State
with us?
784
00:30:22,655 --> 00:30:23,689
It's gonna be
a lot of fun.
785
00:30:23,690 --> 00:30:25,391
I know.
786
00:30:25,392 --> 00:30:29,228
Colorado, the skiing
and the hiking.
787
00:30:29,229 --> 00:30:31,397
And they have a really good
veterinary school there too.
788
00:30:31,398 --> 00:30:34,366
Yeah, yeah,
I guess.
789
00:30:34,367 --> 00:30:35,534
I'll miss you.
790
00:30:35,535 --> 00:30:36,969
I mean, you know,
we'll all miss you,
791
00:30:36,970 --> 00:30:38,070
like, as friends
and stuff.
792
00:30:38,071 --> 00:30:39,071
Of course.
- Yeah.
793
00:30:39,072 --> 00:30:40,739
I'll miss you guys too.
794
00:30:40,740 --> 00:30:43,909
Yeah, definitely.
795
00:30:43,910 --> 00:30:44,910
Here we are.
796
00:30:44,911 --> 00:30:46,378
Yeah, here we are.
797
00:30:50,417 --> 00:30:52,885
So...
798
00:30:54,554 --> 00:30:56,388
Good night?
799
00:30:58,625 --> 00:31:00,759
Well, good night.
800
00:31:00,760 --> 00:31:02,394
Yeah.
801
00:31:02,395 --> 00:31:03,529
Yeah, good night.
802
00:31:03,530 --> 00:31:05,431
Okay.
803
00:31:05,432 --> 00:31:06,432
Tell your mom
I say hello.
804
00:31:06,433 --> 00:31:07,366
Yeah.
805
00:31:11,104 --> 00:31:14,406
Why am I so fucking bad at this?
God.
806
00:31:29,723 --> 00:31:31,390
So, Jay--
807
00:31:31,391 --> 00:31:32,624
I told you you'd come.
808
00:31:32,625 --> 00:31:34,927
Jay.
809
00:31:34,928 --> 00:31:37,262
See you later.
810
00:31:37,263 --> 00:31:38,430
See you later.
811
00:31:42,602 --> 00:31:45,437
Don't judge me.
812
00:31:49,609 --> 00:31:53,012
Yo, why does this happen
every time we party?
813
00:31:53,013 --> 00:31:55,080
Oh, I'm sorry, bro.
814
00:31:55,081 --> 00:31:56,548
I thought you were
my girlfriend.
815
00:31:56,549 --> 00:31:59,618
You don't even have
a girlfriend.
816
00:31:59,619 --> 00:32:00,719
You know
what I mean.
817
00:32:00,720 --> 00:32:04,223
No, I don't know
what you mean.
818
00:32:04,224 --> 00:32:05,224
Relax, Jackson.
819
00:32:05,225 --> 00:32:06,725
It's just a little morning wood.
820
00:32:06,726 --> 00:32:11,964
# it's like I don't know
who you are #
821
00:32:11,965 --> 00:32:16,068
# everyone changes
now you've gone a bit too far #
822
00:32:16,069 --> 00:32:19,838
# it just goes on and on,
and I just can't hold on #
823
00:32:19,839 --> 00:32:24,343
# this sounds like
my new favorite song #
824
00:32:24,344 --> 00:32:27,112
# but it's blowing up my radio #
825
00:32:27,113 --> 00:32:30,783
# when I try to tune you out
but there's no doubt #
826
00:32:30,784 --> 00:32:35,220
# you're gonna be stuck
inside my head #
827
00:32:35,221 --> 00:32:40,726
# all over again #
828
00:32:48,902 --> 00:32:54,373
# I'm sick
of everything I hear #
829
00:32:54,374 --> 00:32:59,278
# wish I could close my eyes
and you just disappear #
830
00:32:59,279 --> 00:33:02,081
Remember, spring
fling is in two weeks.
831
00:33:02,082 --> 00:33:04,483
So find your dates now.
832
00:33:04,484 --> 00:33:07,786
Robin, I haven't seen you
for a while.
833
00:33:07,787 --> 00:33:09,355
You see me every day,
Laurent.
834
00:33:09,356 --> 00:33:10,656
Yeah, every day.
835
00:33:10,657 --> 00:33:14,126
Oh, well, I haven't
talked to you for a while.
836
00:33:14,127 --> 00:33:15,194
How have you been?
837
00:33:15,195 --> 00:33:16,195
I'm fine.
838
00:33:16,196 --> 00:33:17,029
Yeah, she's fine.
839
00:33:18,898 --> 00:33:22,267
Okay, so I've been thinking
about this a lot lately,
840
00:33:22,268 --> 00:33:24,636
and I thought perhaps
we should get together?
841
00:33:24,637 --> 00:33:25,637
Why?
842
00:33:25,638 --> 00:33:26,939
Yeah, why?
843
00:33:26,940 --> 00:33:28,674
I don't know.
844
00:33:28,675 --> 00:33:31,677
Maybe pick up
where we left off?
845
00:33:31,678 --> 00:33:32,678
Ew.
846
00:33:32,679 --> 00:33:34,813
Okay, look, Laurent,
847
00:33:34,814 --> 00:33:36,248
I thought you were a cool guy.
848
00:33:36,249 --> 00:33:38,250
And now I know
you're not cool.
849
00:33:38,251 --> 00:33:39,918
You're insecure.
850
00:33:39,919 --> 00:33:41,887
And I found out
what attache vous really means.
851
00:33:43,189 --> 00:33:44,890
Thank you for the offer.
852
00:33:44,891 --> 00:33:46,158
Yeah, thanks
for the offer.
853
00:33:46,159 --> 00:33:47,426
Bye-bye.
854
00:33:47,427 --> 00:33:49,962
Dave, you look great today.
855
00:33:49,963 --> 00:33:52,464
Yeah, Dave,
really hot.
856
00:33:52,465 --> 00:33:54,667
And not French at all.
857
00:33:54,668 --> 00:33:56,502
Thanks, girls.
858
00:33:56,503 --> 00:33:57,670
This is great.
859
00:33:57,671 --> 00:34:00,305
Seriously, you smell
really, really good.
860
00:34:00,306 --> 00:34:03,442
Let's get out of here.
861
00:34:03,443 --> 00:34:06,078
I say,
"ah, skeet, skeet, skeet!"
862
00:34:06,079 --> 00:34:07,079
What is skeet?
863
00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:08,080
Oh, it's--
864
00:34:08,081 --> 00:34:09,081
Shantz!
865
00:34:09,082 --> 00:34:10,683
I hear you're doing well
866
00:34:10,684 --> 00:34:11,750
in your classes lately.
867
00:34:11,751 --> 00:34:14,253
Yeah, of course.
868
00:34:14,254 --> 00:34:16,088
Been using the old noggin.
869
00:34:17,624 --> 00:34:19,825
Well, keep up
the good work.
870
00:34:19,826 --> 00:34:22,928
Will do.
871
00:34:22,929 --> 00:34:25,197
Mm.
872
00:34:25,198 --> 00:34:27,700
That's a scary woman.
873
00:34:27,701 --> 00:34:29,401
I bet she's crazy
in bed though.
874
00:34:29,402 --> 00:34:30,602
Hoo.
875
00:34:30,603 --> 00:34:31,870
If she were
a few years younger,
876
00:34:31,871 --> 00:34:37,476
I would take it upon myself
to tame that wild beast.
877
00:34:37,477 --> 00:34:40,913
You see, Jay,
that is your problem.
878
00:34:40,914 --> 00:34:41,914
You look at a woman
879
00:34:41,915 --> 00:34:45,250
as if she is a challenge
to conquer,
880
00:34:45,251 --> 00:34:48,153
like climbing a mountain
or winning a stupid game.
881
00:34:48,154 --> 00:34:51,023
It is too bad
that such good looks and charm
882
00:34:51,024 --> 00:34:52,624
are wasted on such a pig.
883
00:34:55,729 --> 00:34:59,465
Damn, that is
one fiery Mexican.
884
00:34:59,466 --> 00:35:01,533
She's Brazilian, bro.
885
00:35:01,534 --> 00:35:03,302
Whatever.
886
00:35:03,303 --> 00:35:05,270
Wait, wait,
hold on.
887
00:35:05,271 --> 00:35:06,438
That was just a game, okay?
888
00:35:06,439 --> 00:35:08,240
I was--
I was kidding.
889
00:35:08,241 --> 00:35:10,709
It's like I can't
control myself, you know?
890
00:35:10,710 --> 00:35:13,412
I'd like to,
but I just can't.
891
00:35:13,413 --> 00:35:15,147
No, you can.
892
00:35:16,583 --> 00:35:18,650
You just don't.
893
00:35:19,819 --> 00:35:21,220
Hey, Dave--
894
00:35:21,221 --> 00:35:25,457
Oh, Dave, Dave, Dave,
895
00:35:25,458 --> 00:35:28,327
why haven't you
screwed Robin yet, eh?
896
00:35:28,328 --> 00:35:30,229
She was all over you yesterday.
897
00:35:30,230 --> 00:35:31,463
I don't know, Laurent.
898
00:35:31,464 --> 00:35:32,898
I just--
we have
899
00:35:32,899 --> 00:35:33,899
this great friendship.
900
00:35:34,901 --> 00:35:36,201
That's your problem, Dave.
901
00:35:36,202 --> 00:35:38,303
A girl doesn't want
to screw a friend.
902
00:35:38,304 --> 00:35:40,806
If you want to score,
you got to know the game, man.
903
00:35:40,807 --> 00:35:42,107
What do you mean,
"the game"?
904
00:35:43,576 --> 00:35:46,945
Robin wants a guy who is smooth.
905
00:35:46,946 --> 00:35:48,814
She wants a man
906
00:35:48,815 --> 00:35:50,015
who knows what he wants
907
00:35:50,016 --> 00:35:51,617
and who knows
how to be strong, eh?
908
00:35:51,618 --> 00:35:54,553
She doesn't want a friend
who she can talk to.
909
00:35:54,554 --> 00:35:56,021
Look at this sentimental shit.
910
00:35:56,022 --> 00:35:57,222
Where you get
all this crap?
911
00:35:57,223 --> 00:36:00,659
Why don't you just lay off,
all right?
912
00:36:00,660 --> 00:36:02,561
Just tell me
what I should do.
913
00:36:02,562 --> 00:36:03,662
Okay.
914
00:36:03,663 --> 00:36:09,768
Well, you have testicle hairy,
eh?
915
00:36:09,769 --> 00:36:10,736
Are you hitting on me?
916
00:36:11,771 --> 00:36:13,339
You wish, Dave.
917
00:36:13,340 --> 00:36:15,974
Look, if you're asking me
if I'm a man, Laurent,
918
00:36:15,975 --> 00:36:17,209
Poster child.
919
00:36:17,210 --> 00:36:19,912
I mean, you Americans
are so gross and hairy
920
00:36:19,913 --> 00:36:21,447
like a bush baby.
921
00:36:21,448 --> 00:36:24,683
A girl likes a man
who's smooth.
922
00:36:24,684 --> 00:36:27,519
You could start
by shaving your balls.
923
00:36:27,520 --> 00:36:28,520
What?
924
00:36:28,521 --> 00:36:31,090
Dave, trust me.
925
00:36:31,091 --> 00:36:32,925
Do the girls not like me?
926
00:36:35,462 --> 00:36:37,563
Damn it.
927
00:36:37,564 --> 00:36:41,166
Okay, Laurent, what--
how do I--
928
00:36:41,167 --> 00:36:43,836
First you will take a scissors,
cut off all the hair.
929
00:36:43,837 --> 00:36:45,504
Then you take razor,
shave it bald,
930
00:36:45,505 --> 00:36:47,139
spritz cologne.
931
00:36:47,140 --> 00:36:48,140
You are a man.
932
00:36:48,141 --> 00:36:49,975
All Frenchmen know this, Dave.
933
00:36:49,976 --> 00:36:51,443
I don't care
if all Frenchmen know it,
934
00:36:51,444 --> 00:36:52,678
but isn't that
gonna itch like hell?
935
00:36:52,679 --> 00:36:56,448
What do you think
Gold Bond Powder is for?
936
00:36:57,851 --> 00:36:59,251
Gold Bond Powder.
937
00:36:59,252 --> 00:37:00,352
What?
938
00:37:00,353 --> 00:37:03,188
Gold Bond Powder.
939
00:37:03,189 --> 00:37:04,256
Oh.
940
00:37:04,257 --> 00:37:05,491
Gold Bond Powder.
941
00:37:05,492 --> 00:37:06,492
Oui.
942
00:37:06,493 --> 00:37:07,493
What do you think it's for,
943
00:37:07,494 --> 00:37:09,028
Gold Bond Powder?
944
00:37:17,504 --> 00:37:18,437
Agh!
945
00:37:24,177 --> 00:37:25,978
Ow! Fuck.
946
00:37:30,316 --> 00:37:31,984
Oh!
947
00:37:35,155 --> 00:37:37,923
Holy shit!
948
00:37:37,924 --> 00:37:40,459
If you were smarter than me,
you wouldn't do what I say.
949
00:37:40,460 --> 00:37:42,461
You know what I'm saying?
950
00:37:42,462 --> 00:37:44,697
I don't know
what you're saying.
951
00:37:44,698 --> 00:37:45,731
Hey, Shantz.
952
00:37:45,732 --> 00:37:47,166
Long time no see.
953
00:37:47,167 --> 00:37:48,667
What's going on, ladies?
954
00:37:48,668 --> 00:37:50,436
Kind of starting to look
like a regular
955
00:37:50,437 --> 00:37:53,038
National League meeting
over here.
956
00:37:53,039 --> 00:37:54,673
National League.
957
00:37:54,674 --> 00:37:57,176
I think you mean
United Nations, cock breath.
958
00:37:57,177 --> 00:37:58,544
Blow me, Jay.
959
00:37:58,545 --> 00:38:00,612
Yeah, maybe you don't know
what we're talking about,
960
00:38:00,613 --> 00:38:03,182
but I bet Osama over here knows.
961
00:38:03,183 --> 00:38:04,283
Why don't you shut the hell up
962
00:38:04,284 --> 00:38:05,284
before something bad
happens to you.
963
00:38:05,285 --> 00:38:06,485
Relax, man.
964
00:38:06,486 --> 00:38:08,654
I'm just messing
with the little towel head.
965
00:38:08,655 --> 00:38:10,789
Yeah, well, leave him alone.
966
00:38:10,790 --> 00:38:13,792
And, Jackson,
do me a favor.
967
00:38:13,793 --> 00:38:15,394
Football season ended
five months ago.
968
00:38:15,395 --> 00:38:17,296
Take off the damn jersey.
969
00:38:17,297 --> 00:38:20,632
Fine.
970
00:38:20,633 --> 00:38:22,634
Dude, you're looking good.
971
00:38:22,635 --> 00:38:24,536
You been hitting
the gym more?
972
00:38:28,875 --> 00:38:30,542
Are these guys
your friends?
973
00:38:32,078 --> 00:38:33,679
Look, you got to give him
a break.
974
00:38:33,680 --> 00:38:35,881
His brother's
over in Iraq right now.
975
00:38:35,882 --> 00:38:37,049
I am from India.
976
00:38:37,050 --> 00:38:39,051
What is his fucking problem?
977
00:38:39,052 --> 00:38:40,285
You know what,
978
00:38:40,286 --> 00:38:42,287
I'm gonna go knock some sense
into them.
979
00:38:42,288 --> 00:38:43,522
See you guys later.
980
00:38:43,523 --> 00:38:45,290
Bring me back a tooth.
- Will do.
981
00:38:45,291 --> 00:38:47,593
I don't want to be
a downer or anything.
982
00:38:47,594 --> 00:38:48,761
I mean, I really like America,
983
00:38:48,762 --> 00:38:51,263
but sometimes
it's not so easy here.
984
00:38:51,264 --> 00:38:52,664
Yeah, we understand that,
man.
985
00:38:52,665 --> 00:38:53,866
I mean, we live here,
you know?
986
00:38:53,867 --> 00:38:55,501
It's hard.
987
00:38:55,502 --> 00:38:57,503
You know, we should just
get the hell out of here.
988
00:38:57,504 --> 00:39:03,442
Yes, let's cut fifth period
and go get high.
989
00:39:03,443 --> 00:39:05,210
I was actually talking about
this weekend.
990
00:39:05,211 --> 00:39:06,345
We should do something--
991
00:39:06,346 --> 00:39:08,614
You know, just get out of here
for the weekend.
992
00:39:08,615 --> 00:39:09,682
We can go camping.
993
00:39:09,683 --> 00:39:10,683
I'm down.
994
00:39:10,684 --> 00:39:12,117
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
995
00:39:12,118 --> 00:39:13,285
If you guys want to go,
996
00:39:13,286 --> 00:39:14,319
meet at my house Friday night;
997
00:39:14,320 --> 00:39:15,320
we'll leave from there.
998
00:39:15,321 --> 00:39:17,089
Hey, butt buddies.
999
00:39:17,090 --> 00:39:18,691
What the hell's wrong
with you guys, huh?
1000
00:39:18,692 --> 00:39:20,092
He ain't nothing
to you.
1001
00:39:22,062 --> 00:39:23,896
Oh, gentlemen.
1002
00:39:23,897 --> 00:39:25,898
Look, it's little Shantz.
1003
00:39:25,899 --> 00:39:28,000
And what position
do you play?
1004
00:39:28,001 --> 00:39:30,669
Uh, tailback, why?
1005
00:39:30,670 --> 00:39:33,038
You think you can be
a quarterback next year?
1006
00:39:33,039 --> 00:39:35,841
Our starter is the top returning
quarterback in the country.
1007
00:39:35,842 --> 00:39:38,277
That's fine, Hunter,
1008
00:39:38,278 --> 00:39:40,846
but our starting QB
is graduating.
1009
00:39:40,847 --> 00:39:43,115
So we could use
a talent like Shantz.
1010
00:39:43,116 --> 00:39:44,383
And since there's
1011
00:39:44,384 --> 00:39:45,784
no possible way that Shantz
1012
00:39:45,785 --> 00:39:48,921
is making these test grades
on his own,
1013
00:39:48,922 --> 00:39:51,957
I figure you can start for us
next year
1014
00:39:51,958 --> 00:39:53,826
when you repeat senior year.
1015
00:39:53,827 --> 00:39:54,827
Yeah, man.
1016
00:39:54,828 --> 00:39:56,395
Hut, hut, hut!
1017
00:39:56,396 --> 00:39:58,831
Ha, ha, ha,
good one, janitor.
1018
00:39:58,832 --> 00:40:00,666
Remember,
1019
00:40:00,667 --> 00:40:02,868
when it howls at the moon,
it's a wolf.
1020
00:40:02,869 --> 00:40:06,638
And when it howls at the sun,
it's a cock.
1021
00:40:08,475 --> 00:40:10,843
So, how's your bones?
1022
00:40:10,844 --> 00:40:13,045
A little itchy,
and a little painful,
1023
00:40:13,046 --> 00:40:14,246
but you know what?
1024
00:40:14,247 --> 00:40:15,948
For the most part,
I'm feeling pretty good.
1025
00:40:15,949 --> 00:40:17,950
You know, I think I'm about
to go ask Robin right now
1026
00:40:17,951 --> 00:40:18,951
to go camping with us.
1027
00:40:18,952 --> 00:40:20,786
No, you're not.
1028
00:40:20,787 --> 00:40:21,787
Why not?
1029
00:40:21,788 --> 00:40:23,155
Dave, you must wait
1030
00:40:23,156 --> 00:40:24,156
till she asks you, eh?
1031
00:40:26,459 --> 00:40:28,827
Ah, cool,
all right, all right.
1032
00:40:28,828 --> 00:40:32,965
Oh, here comes Mia.
Got to go.
1033
00:40:32,966 --> 00:40:34,233
Hey, Mia.
1034
00:40:34,234 --> 00:40:35,634
Aren't you excited?
1035
00:40:35,635 --> 00:40:37,202
Excited about what?
1036
00:40:37,203 --> 00:40:38,604
For the camping trip
this weekend.
1037
00:40:38,605 --> 00:40:40,172
What camping trip?
1038
00:40:40,173 --> 00:40:44,643
Oh, Dave did not tell you yet,
did he?
1039
00:40:44,644 --> 00:40:46,912
We're all going camping
this weekend.
1040
00:40:46,913 --> 00:40:48,147
Sounds like fun.
1041
00:40:48,148 --> 00:40:49,581
Yeah.
1042
00:40:49,582 --> 00:40:52,317
You know, Dave
really wants you to go.
1043
00:40:52,318 --> 00:40:54,520
He's just afraid
to ask you.
1044
00:40:54,521 --> 00:40:55,688
Really?
1045
00:40:55,689 --> 00:40:56,689
Yes, really.
1046
00:40:56,690 --> 00:40:57,923
You should come.
1047
00:40:57,924 --> 00:40:59,258
I have to go now,
1048
00:40:59,259 --> 00:41:01,660
but I will see you this weekend,
okay?
1049
00:41:01,661 --> 00:41:03,062
Okay.
1050
00:41:03,063 --> 00:41:04,697
Friday, after school,
Dave's house.
1051
00:41:06,332 --> 00:41:07,399
Bye.
1052
00:41:07,400 --> 00:41:08,200
Yes.
1053
00:41:20,980 --> 00:41:22,114
Hey.
1054
00:41:22,115 --> 00:41:24,216
You seem awful happy.
1055
00:41:24,217 --> 00:41:25,217
What can I say?
1056
00:41:25,218 --> 00:41:27,086
Everything's clean.
1057
00:41:27,087 --> 00:41:29,388
Okay.
1058
00:41:29,389 --> 00:41:32,024
So word is, you're going
to the lake this weekend.
1059
00:41:32,025 --> 00:41:33,225
Yeah.
1060
00:41:33,226 --> 00:41:34,760
When were you
gonna invite me?
1061
00:41:34,761 --> 00:41:37,229
Oh, I just didn't think
you and mother nature got along.
1062
00:41:38,798 --> 00:41:40,466
What's that supposed to mean?
1063
00:41:40,467 --> 00:41:42,101
Is that, like, a period joke?
1064
00:41:42,102 --> 00:41:45,571
No, it's not a period--
no.
1065
00:41:45,572 --> 00:41:47,039
Anyway, look, I was gonna
invite you.
1066
00:41:47,040 --> 00:41:48,040
I just--
1067
00:41:48,041 --> 00:41:49,174
It's okay, Dave.
1068
00:41:49,175 --> 00:41:50,743
Laurent already invited me.
1069
00:41:53,279 --> 00:41:55,414
What do you mean
Laurent already invited you?
1070
00:41:55,415 --> 00:41:57,750
Yeah, he's been really nice
lately; I don't know.
1071
00:41:57,751 --> 00:41:59,985
He said he wanted me
to be there.
1072
00:41:59,986 --> 00:42:02,588
Unless you don't want me to go.
1073
00:42:02,589 --> 00:42:05,824
No, no, of course--
of course I--
1074
00:42:05,825 --> 00:42:08,127
Shh!
1075
00:42:08,128 --> 00:42:10,195
Of course I want...
1076
00:42:10,196 --> 00:42:12,931
This painting
is from early in her career
1077
00:42:12,932 --> 00:42:15,267
and is the piece
that really launched her career.
1078
00:42:16,569 --> 00:42:18,737
So if you look closely,
you'll see
1079
00:42:18,738 --> 00:42:21,040
the wonderful textures
and brush strokes.
1080
00:42:21,041 --> 00:42:22,074
You can almost feel
1081
00:42:22,075 --> 00:42:24,443
the artist's passion
and urgency
1082
00:42:24,444 --> 00:42:26,278
with which she painted
this masterpiece.
1083
00:42:26,279 --> 00:42:28,580
So let's move on.
1084
00:42:28,581 --> 00:42:31,083
Didn't I see this in
Ass Pirates II:
1085
00:42:31,084 --> 00:42:34,420
Curse of the Pearl Necklace?
1086
00:42:34,421 --> 00:42:37,256
This the most gorgeous example
of true art
1087
00:42:37,257 --> 00:42:39,391
that I have ever seen.
1088
00:42:39,392 --> 00:42:41,326
There is fire.
There is beauty.
1089
00:42:41,327 --> 00:42:43,929
There is passion.
1090
00:42:43,930 --> 00:42:45,698
So you can go
get out of here.
1091
00:42:45,699 --> 00:42:47,766
Oh, really?
1092
00:42:47,767 --> 00:42:51,837
Because to me, it looks like
my bedroom most weekends.
1093
00:42:51,838 --> 00:42:52,838
Women.
1094
00:42:52,839 --> 00:42:56,642
You are a fool.
1095
00:42:56,643 --> 00:42:58,243
It's my favorite painting
in the museum.
1096
00:42:58,244 --> 00:43:02,247
It's just so, so--
so righteous.
1097
00:43:02,248 --> 00:43:04,216
Isn't it?
1098
00:43:04,217 --> 00:43:09,288
Very fearless,
very honest.
1099
00:43:09,289 --> 00:43:12,191
Did you know that the painter
was born in 1945
1100
00:43:12,192 --> 00:43:14,860
and died in 1975?
1101
00:43:14,861 --> 00:43:16,562
I know.
1102
00:43:16,563 --> 00:43:17,963
Such a short life
1103
00:43:17,964 --> 00:43:21,367
but such an amazing body
of work.
1104
00:43:21,368 --> 00:43:22,634
Did you know that she was
1105
00:43:22,635 --> 00:43:24,970
a very accomplished
guitar player as well.
1106
00:43:24,971 --> 00:43:28,107
Really?
1107
00:43:28,108 --> 00:43:29,842
No, I did not know that.
1108
00:43:31,177 --> 00:43:32,711
I play guitar.
1109
00:43:32,712 --> 00:43:33,979
That is wonderful.
1110
00:43:33,980 --> 00:43:35,547
Wow, yeah,
and did you know--
1111
00:43:35,548 --> 00:43:36,548
and did you know
1112
00:43:36,549 --> 00:43:39,051
that she's 17 years old
1113
00:43:39,052 --> 00:43:41,086
and in high school?
1114
00:43:41,087 --> 00:43:42,654
Did you know that?
1115
00:43:42,655 --> 00:43:44,056
No, I didn't.
1116
00:43:44,057 --> 00:43:47,426
First off,
my age is not an issue.
1117
00:43:47,427 --> 00:43:49,128
Second, who I talk to
1118
00:43:49,129 --> 00:43:50,596
is none of your business.
1119
00:43:50,597 --> 00:43:55,100
I'm just trying to protect you
from this cock mongrel.
1120
00:43:55,101 --> 00:43:57,936
Cock mongrel.
Wow, good one.
1121
00:43:57,937 --> 00:44:01,573
You are the one
who is being a cock,
1122
00:44:01,574 --> 00:44:05,477
whatever it is, Jay.
1123
00:44:05,478 --> 00:44:09,448
Now leave me alone, please.
1124
00:44:09,449 --> 00:44:13,185
Whatever.
1125
00:44:13,186 --> 00:44:14,687
He's an idiot.
1126
00:44:16,322 --> 00:44:17,423
Laurent,
1127
00:44:17,424 --> 00:44:19,525
why'd you ask Robin
to the river?
1128
00:44:19,526 --> 00:44:20,859
Because she needs
a good fucking.
1129
00:44:20,860 --> 00:44:22,327
What?
1130
00:44:22,328 --> 00:44:23,962
What?
- Um...
1131
00:44:23,963 --> 00:44:25,364
For you, Dave.
1132
00:44:25,365 --> 00:44:28,500
I ask because this way,
Robin will go to the river,
1133
00:44:28,501 --> 00:44:30,903
but you can play it cool,
you know?
1134
00:44:30,904 --> 00:44:34,573
Hmm, play it cool.
1135
00:44:34,574 --> 00:44:37,042
Okay, yeah, yeah,
I like that.
1136
00:44:37,043 --> 00:44:38,043
Good job.
1137
00:44:38,044 --> 00:44:39,044
Thank you so much, man.
1138
00:44:39,045 --> 00:44:41,246
I appreciate it.
1139
00:44:41,247 --> 00:44:44,983
I've just been stressing out
about it.
1140
00:44:44,984 --> 00:44:45,984
Dude, oh, shit.
1141
00:44:45,985 --> 00:44:46,719
Be right back.
1142
00:45:01,801 --> 00:45:03,902
Hi, Dave.
1143
00:45:03,903 --> 00:45:06,071
Mia, what are you doing here?
1144
00:45:06,072 --> 00:45:07,740
Going camping, silly.
1145
00:45:07,741 --> 00:45:10,342
What does it look like?
1146
00:45:10,343 --> 00:45:11,910
Nice job, son.
1147
00:45:13,980 --> 00:45:17,016
Those Japanese
get good mileage.
1148
00:45:17,017 --> 00:45:18,417
You know, your mom and I
1149
00:45:18,418 --> 00:45:19,852
used to fit
two of us in there, buddy.
1150
00:45:19,853 --> 00:45:21,153
Dad, please.
1151
00:45:21,154 --> 00:45:24,156
Listen, choosing a girlfriend,
son,
1152
00:45:24,157 --> 00:45:28,394
Is a little like
buying a used car.
1153
00:45:28,395 --> 00:45:30,295
If the oil doesn't smell right,
1154
00:45:30,296 --> 00:45:33,265
there's probably something wrong
with the vehicle.
1155
00:45:59,459 --> 00:46:00,826
Pizza parlor.
1156
00:46:04,164 --> 00:46:07,266
Robin, will you go with me
to the bathroom?
1157
00:46:07,267 --> 00:46:08,567
Yeah, of course.
1158
00:46:08,568 --> 00:46:09,835
Anita, do you want to come?
1159
00:46:09,836 --> 00:46:11,603
We'll show you
how we rough it in America?
1160
00:46:11,604 --> 00:46:13,772
Oh, have you seen pictures
of my hometown?
1161
00:46:13,773 --> 00:46:17,309
This place is like a major city
where I come from.
1162
00:46:17,310 --> 00:46:18,544
Come on.
1163
00:46:18,545 --> 00:46:20,312
Thank you.
1164
00:46:20,313 --> 00:46:23,649
You got to man up, soldier.
1165
00:46:23,650 --> 00:46:24,683
You know, Robin isn't gonna
come over
1166
00:46:24,684 --> 00:46:25,984
and blow you
in front of all of us.
1167
00:46:25,985 --> 00:46:27,453
I don't need to hear this
from you guys
1168
00:46:27,454 --> 00:46:29,955
every five seconds;
I know, I know, I know.
1169
00:46:29,956 --> 00:46:30,989
Look, I got her here.
1170
00:46:30,990 --> 00:46:32,591
You know, I got
the perfect opportunity.
1171
00:46:32,592 --> 00:46:35,961
I just--
I don't know what to say.
1172
00:46:35,962 --> 00:46:39,665
Mm, well, I would say
1173
00:46:39,666 --> 00:46:42,334
in the signature
Shantz supersexy whisper,
1174
00:46:42,335 --> 00:46:45,037
"let me sneak it in, baby."
1175
00:46:45,038 --> 00:46:46,505
It works almost every time.
1176
00:46:46,506 --> 00:46:48,140
Why am I not surprised?
1177
00:46:48,141 --> 00:46:50,075
Hey, that's just my skeezy,
all right?
1178
00:46:50,076 --> 00:46:51,677
You know, Jay over here
1179
00:46:51,678 --> 00:46:53,645
might be the better man
to ask about this.
1180
00:46:53,646 --> 00:46:55,547
You got that right.
1181
00:46:55,548 --> 00:46:57,449
I am a vaginologist.
1182
00:46:57,450 --> 00:46:59,585
So hey, feel free
to ask me anything.
1183
00:46:59,586 --> 00:47:04,556
Okay, vaginologist,
with Robin, how do I--
1184
00:47:04,557 --> 00:47:07,359
All right, Dave,
1185
00:47:07,360 --> 00:47:10,562
I'm gonna let you in
on the secret to getting laid.
1186
00:47:10,563 --> 00:47:14,967
All girls are insecure.
1187
00:47:14,968 --> 00:47:18,203
Wait, that's your secret?
1188
00:47:18,204 --> 00:47:21,273
That alone isn't the secret.
1189
00:47:21,274 --> 00:47:23,842
It's how you use
that vital information.
1190
00:47:23,843 --> 00:47:25,144
What do you do if you just,
1191
00:47:25,145 --> 00:47:28,380
I don't know,
1192
00:47:28,381 --> 00:47:29,948
really like a girl?
1193
00:47:29,949 --> 00:47:31,884
Well...
1194
00:47:32,952 --> 00:47:33,952
I don't know, Dave.
1195
00:47:33,953 --> 00:47:35,988
I mean, that stuff
1196
00:47:35,989 --> 00:47:38,490
will get you laid for sure,
1197
00:47:38,491 --> 00:47:40,225
but I don't know, bro.
1198
00:47:40,226 --> 00:47:43,028
I've never really
liked a girl before,
1199
00:47:43,029 --> 00:47:44,129
so I couldn't tell you.
1200
00:47:44,130 --> 00:47:45,130
Oh, right, right, right.
1201
00:47:45,131 --> 00:47:46,165
So you're telling me
1202
00:47:46,166 --> 00:47:48,500
you know all this shit
about girls,
1203
00:47:48,501 --> 00:47:51,070
but you can't see
dead in front of you?
1204
00:47:51,071 --> 00:47:52,571
Come on, dude.
1205
00:47:52,572 --> 00:47:53,839
And I can't take
your advice.
1206
00:47:53,840 --> 00:47:54,907
I mean,
how am I supposed--
1207
00:47:54,908 --> 00:47:56,542
Hey, try this, man.
1208
00:47:56,543 --> 00:47:58,444
Just tell her.
1209
00:47:58,445 --> 00:47:59,611
Tell her how you feel.
1210
00:48:03,750 --> 00:48:06,118
Yeah, that sounds cool.
1211
00:48:06,119 --> 00:48:09,054
Try that.
1212
00:48:09,055 --> 00:48:10,956
You know what?
1213
00:48:10,957 --> 00:48:12,558
I think I might just give that
a shot.
1214
00:48:12,559 --> 00:48:17,129
Dave, you pussy.
1215
00:48:19,165 --> 00:48:21,734
Hey, Russian Dude...
1216
00:48:21,735 --> 00:48:22,735
Good morning.
1217
00:48:22,736 --> 00:48:24,036
Look, grab the ammo.
1218
00:48:24,037 --> 00:48:25,204
Hey, nice English.
1219
00:48:25,205 --> 00:48:26,605
Listen, I just spotted
fresh feces
1220
00:48:26,606 --> 00:48:28,107
about 60 paces inward.
1221
00:48:28,108 --> 00:48:29,274
I got 'em on the run,
buddy.
1222
00:48:29,275 --> 00:48:30,509
You're my eyes today,
soldier.
1223
00:48:30,510 --> 00:48:31,510
Hey, look!
1224
00:48:31,511 --> 00:48:33,012
Eyes.
Let's go.
1225
00:48:33,013 --> 00:48:35,147
Hey, come on, let's go!
1226
00:48:37,050 --> 00:48:38,183
I wanted to apologize
1227
00:48:38,184 --> 00:48:40,185
about the thing
with the museum guy.
1228
00:48:40,186 --> 00:48:41,320
I thought he was a jerk,
1229
00:48:41,321 --> 00:48:43,088
and I was just trying
to be a good guy.
1230
00:48:43,089 --> 00:48:44,456
It's okay, Jay.
1231
00:48:44,457 --> 00:48:46,859
I know you're just trying
to help.
1232
00:48:46,860 --> 00:48:49,261
But you should give him
a chance.
1233
00:48:49,262 --> 00:48:52,064
Give him a chance?
1234
00:48:52,065 --> 00:48:54,166
He's going to take me
to the dance next week.
1235
00:48:55,935 --> 00:48:58,203
So don't be
a cock mongrel.
1236
00:49:01,341 --> 00:49:04,076
Whoo-hoo, hoo!
1237
00:49:04,077 --> 00:49:05,344
Dasvidanya!
1238
00:49:05,345 --> 00:49:07,780
Bird down.
We got a bird down.
1239
00:49:07,781 --> 00:49:10,182
Holy shit, Russian Dude,
that was awesome.
1240
00:49:10,183 --> 00:49:11,417
Hey, how'd you do that?
1241
00:49:11,418 --> 00:49:13,585
Bird, morning, yes,
1242
00:49:13,586 --> 00:49:16,088
fly, bang-bang.
1243
00:49:16,089 --> 00:49:17,056
Fuckin' a bang-bang!
1244
00:49:17,057 --> 00:49:18,090
Whoo!
1245
00:49:18,091 --> 00:49:19,358
You two.
1246
00:49:19,359 --> 00:49:21,026
Put the weapon down
1247
00:49:21,027 --> 00:49:22,327
and step away
1248
00:49:22,328 --> 00:49:24,363
from the carcass.
1249
00:49:24,364 --> 00:49:28,867
Hello, Mr. Forest Ranger man.
1250
00:49:28,868 --> 00:49:30,302
Can I help you?
1251
00:49:30,303 --> 00:49:34,707
License and registration,
please.
1252
00:49:43,450 --> 00:49:46,985
What's this, a-hole?
1253
00:49:46,986 --> 00:49:49,688
This is your driver's license.
1254
00:49:49,689 --> 00:49:52,224
You didn't
run the damn thing over.
1255
00:49:54,461 --> 00:49:57,329
I need to see
your hunting license.
1256
00:49:57,330 --> 00:49:59,231
Uhh.
1257
00:50:01,634 --> 00:50:05,004
We--we don't have one.
1258
00:50:05,005 --> 00:50:09,375
I didn't think so.
1259
00:50:09,376 --> 00:50:14,213
You boys are in
some very serious trouble.
1260
00:50:16,750 --> 00:50:17,750
I want you
1261
00:50:17,751 --> 00:50:20,753
to hug that tree.
1262
00:50:23,256 --> 00:50:25,758
Embrace the timber.
1263
00:50:35,535 --> 00:50:36,535
Gordon--
1264
00:50:36,536 --> 00:50:37,870
It's Shantz, man.
1265
00:50:37,871 --> 00:50:38,871
It's Shantz.
1266
00:50:38,872 --> 00:50:40,506
Shut up.
1267
00:50:40,507 --> 00:50:41,940
Gordon Lally.
1268
00:50:41,941 --> 00:50:43,342
Where do I know
1269
00:50:43,343 --> 00:50:44,777
that name from?
1270
00:50:47,280 --> 00:50:49,682
You're not Todd's kid,
are you?
1271
00:50:49,683 --> 00:50:52,751
Uh, yeah, that's--
that's my dad.
1272
00:50:52,752 --> 00:50:57,823
Well, hell, I didn't recognize
you without diapers on, buddy.
1273
00:50:57,824 --> 00:51:01,760
You know, I've got a warm spot
in my heart for you.
1274
00:51:01,761 --> 00:51:07,399
You see, my wife and I
used to swing with your parents.
1275
00:51:07,400 --> 00:51:09,201
I had my first
1276
00:51:09,202 --> 00:51:12,271
man-on-man meat munch
with your father,
1277
00:51:12,272 --> 00:51:14,673
although he did
most of the munching,
1278
00:51:14,674 --> 00:51:16,809
if you know what I mean.
1279
00:51:16,810 --> 00:51:17,910
Wait, huh?
1280
00:51:17,911 --> 00:51:20,412
Under the circumstances,
1281
00:51:20,413 --> 00:51:23,315
I think I'm gonna
let you boys slide.
1282
00:51:25,418 --> 00:51:27,519
You don't know how many times
1283
00:51:27,520 --> 00:51:30,356
your dad took the dump truck
for me.
1284
00:51:30,357 --> 00:51:32,725
Talk about a wingman.
1285
00:51:32,726 --> 00:51:35,494
Good times.
1286
00:51:35,495 --> 00:51:37,496
Good times.
1287
00:51:37,497 --> 00:51:40,032
Okay, thanks a lot, man.
1288
00:51:40,033 --> 00:51:44,803
Oh, and tell your dad
Long Larry says hey.
1289
00:51:47,507 --> 00:51:48,507
Hey, Shantz.
1290
00:51:48,508 --> 00:51:49,508
Hmm?
1291
00:51:49,509 --> 00:51:51,310
How was the hunting
for beaver?
1292
00:51:51,311 --> 00:51:53,045
Oh, it was good.
1293
00:51:53,046 --> 00:51:54,847
But you know,
I couldn't catch any beaver
1294
00:51:54,848 --> 00:51:56,281
as good as your mom's was
last night.
1295
00:51:56,282 --> 00:51:58,584
Oh! Boom!
1296
00:51:58,585 --> 00:51:59,852
I know what you're saying, dude.
1297
00:51:59,853 --> 00:52:01,453
I'd still be pounding
your mama's beaver
1298
00:52:01,454 --> 00:52:03,055
if it wasn't for her
catching chlamydia.
1299
00:52:03,056 --> 00:52:05,057
Oh! Yeah?
1300
00:52:05,058 --> 00:52:07,393
Well, that's why I only
bang your mom in the ass.
1301
00:52:07,394 --> 00:52:09,161
Oh!
1302
00:52:09,162 --> 00:52:10,295
Burn.
1303
00:52:10,296 --> 00:52:12,097
You know, I got
a little nervous though
1304
00:52:12,098 --> 00:52:14,133
when you got anal warts from
Russian Dude's mom over there.
1305
00:52:14,134 --> 00:52:15,868
Ooh!
1306
00:52:15,869 --> 00:52:17,770
Tronovsky's mama
is angel.
1307
00:52:17,771 --> 00:52:19,638
Whoa, whoa,
calm down, Russian Dude.
1308
00:52:19,639 --> 00:52:21,040
Calm down.
It's cool.
1309
00:52:21,041 --> 00:52:23,308
Hey, he didn't mean
anything by it, all right?
1310
00:52:23,309 --> 00:52:25,077
That's just how we talk
in America, you know?
1311
00:52:25,078 --> 00:52:27,012
My mom left me when I was, like,
two years old,
1312
00:52:27,013 --> 00:52:28,380
so who gives a shit, right?
1313
00:52:28,381 --> 00:52:29,448
It's just meant to be funny.
1314
00:52:29,449 --> 00:52:31,116
"Ha, ha, ha," funny?
1315
00:52:31,117 --> 00:52:32,718
All right, just look, watch.
1316
00:52:32,719 --> 00:52:34,753
Jay,
1317
00:52:34,754 --> 00:52:36,221
Your mama's so fat...
1318
00:52:36,222 --> 00:52:37,222
Oh, yeah?
1319
00:52:37,223 --> 00:52:38,557
How fat is she?
1320
00:52:38,558 --> 00:52:41,727
She's so fat, she uses
a submarine as a vibrator.
1321
00:52:41,728 --> 00:52:43,729
Oh!
1322
00:52:46,199 --> 00:52:47,933
Ganja, why don't you try one?
1323
00:52:47,934 --> 00:52:49,702
Okay.
1324
00:52:49,703 --> 00:52:53,405
Your mother is bad at math.
1325
00:52:53,406 --> 00:52:54,773
Not quite, Ganja,
1326
00:52:54,774 --> 00:52:56,442
but you know what,
you're on the right track.
1327
00:52:56,443 --> 00:52:57,443
Gentlemen
1328
00:52:57,444 --> 00:52:59,745
and lady, Ganj and I
1329
00:52:59,746 --> 00:53:01,880
have a first-class ticket
to Bluntsville.
1330
00:53:01,881 --> 00:53:03,716
So if anyone
would like to join us,
1331
00:53:03,717 --> 00:53:05,417
we'll be over there.
1332
00:53:08,455 --> 00:53:10,522
Your mother eats cow testicles?
1333
00:53:11,524 --> 00:53:13,625
Not bad, Ganja,
not bad.
1334
00:53:13,626 --> 00:53:15,194
Well done.
1335
00:53:15,195 --> 00:53:16,195
Bonsoir!
1336
00:53:16,196 --> 00:53:17,262
The Frenchman!
1337
00:53:17,263 --> 00:53:19,031
Ten bucks says
that Jay's next mama joke
1338
00:53:19,032 --> 00:53:21,533
is the one
about the elephant trunks.
1339
00:53:21,534 --> 00:53:23,335
The--oh, the--
he loves that one, the...
1340
00:53:24,504 --> 00:53:25,871
Oh!
- Oh, Jesus.
1341
00:53:25,872 --> 00:53:30,609
You--
- Yeah, I'm fine.
1342
00:53:30,610 --> 00:53:31,977
Oh, yeah, by the way,
is it just me
1343
00:53:31,978 --> 00:53:33,846
or is it
completely obvious with--
1344
00:53:33,847 --> 00:53:35,914
Oh, obvious.
1345
00:53:35,915 --> 00:53:38,684
You know, I think--
I think Jay really likes Anita.
1346
00:53:38,685 --> 00:53:40,119
He just doesn't know
how to tell her.
1347
00:53:40,120 --> 00:53:41,954
Yeah, and I think
she likes him too.
1348
00:53:41,955 --> 00:53:44,456
I think she's just waiting
for him to make a move.
1349
00:53:48,695 --> 00:53:50,095
Yeah, well, you know Jay.
1350
00:53:50,096 --> 00:53:52,765
He can--
he can be such a--
1351
00:53:52,766 --> 00:53:54,533
Pussy.
1352
00:53:54,534 --> 00:53:55,634
Pussy, exactly.
1353
00:53:55,635 --> 00:53:58,637
Uh, listen, Robin,
1354
00:53:58,638 --> 00:54:00,773
the reason I brought you
out here actually...
1355
00:54:00,774 --> 00:54:02,608
Pussy?
1356
00:54:02,609 --> 00:54:06,879
Uh, no--
no, not about pussy.
1357
00:54:06,880 --> 00:54:09,181
Uh, just about--
1358
00:54:09,182 --> 00:54:12,017
I've been thinking about
a lot of stuff lately and--
1359
00:54:12,018 --> 00:54:15,320
Okay, Dave.
1360
00:54:15,321 --> 00:54:18,924
Uh, yeah, and--
you know, it's just--
1361
00:54:18,925 --> 00:54:20,492
I've been wanting
to tell you something
1362
00:54:20,493 --> 00:54:22,628
for a really long time now.
1363
00:54:22,629 --> 00:54:24,229
Dave, are you okay?
1364
00:54:24,230 --> 00:54:25,364
Yeah, no, I'm fine.
1365
00:54:25,365 --> 00:54:26,532
It's just the jeans.
1366
00:54:26,533 --> 00:54:28,167
They're new,
and you know.
1367
00:54:28,168 --> 00:54:29,168
Are you sure you're okay?
1368
00:54:29,169 --> 00:54:30,336
Yeah, no, I'm fine.
1369
00:54:30,337 --> 00:54:31,503
Um, actually, do you mind
1370
00:54:31,504 --> 00:54:33,372
just waiting right--
just, like, right here?
1371
00:54:33,373 --> 00:54:34,640
I'll be right back.
1372
00:54:34,641 --> 00:54:36,408
I think I hear Laurent
calling me.
1373
00:54:36,409 --> 00:54:37,409
Yeah, I'll be right back.
1374
00:54:37,410 --> 00:54:38,510
Laurent, I'm coming, buddy.
1375
00:54:38,511 --> 00:54:40,479
Your mom's tits are so saggy,
1376
00:54:40,480 --> 00:54:42,748
it's like she is an elephant
with two trunks.
1377
00:54:44,751 --> 00:54:46,485
Oh, yeah, well,
your mom is so ugly,
1378
00:54:46,486 --> 00:54:48,854
Laurent wouldn't even bang her
in the face.
1379
00:54:48,855 --> 00:54:51,523
Wait, I mean,
don't bring me into this, okay?
1380
00:54:59,165 --> 00:55:00,432
Ahh.
1381
00:55:00,433 --> 00:55:03,602
Now, Russian Dude,
tell me, "your mama."
1382
00:55:03,603 --> 00:55:04,603
My mama.
1383
00:55:04,604 --> 00:55:05,671
What is it, Dave?
1384
00:55:05,672 --> 00:55:06,805
My balls.
1385
00:55:06,806 --> 00:55:08,273
My balls,
they itch like crazy, okay?
1386
00:55:08,274 --> 00:55:09,575
Do you know where
the Gold Bond Powder is at?
1387
00:55:09,576 --> 00:55:11,076
I thought you bring this.
1388
00:55:11,077 --> 00:55:12,311
Yeah, I did,
but I can't find it,
1389
00:55:12,312 --> 00:55:14,213
all right?
1390
00:55:14,214 --> 00:55:15,514
Here. Perfect.
1391
00:55:17,584 --> 00:55:20,219
Laurent, this--
this is peanut butter.
1392
00:55:20,220 --> 00:55:21,954
Oui, oui,
penis butter.
1393
00:55:21,955 --> 00:55:24,123
It is an old French remedy,
huh?
1394
00:55:24,124 --> 00:55:26,025
Trust me.
It will kill the itch.
1395
00:55:27,394 --> 00:55:28,560
So what do I do,
I just put it--
1396
00:55:28,561 --> 00:55:29,762
Yeah, you just--
1397
00:55:29,763 --> 00:55:30,996
Yeah, you rub on
the balls.
1398
00:55:30,997 --> 00:55:31,997
What do you think?
1399
00:55:31,998 --> 00:55:34,466
Put on the balls, ya?
1400
00:55:34,467 --> 00:55:35,768
Mon freir, okay.
1401
00:55:35,769 --> 00:55:36,535
Go, go.
1402
00:55:38,371 --> 00:55:45,077
So, Mia Ho, have you made
your move on Dave yet?
1403
00:55:45,078 --> 00:55:47,146
I'm kind of trying to play
hard to get with him.
1404
00:55:47,147 --> 00:55:50,282
No, Mia, you can't
play hard to get with Dave.
1405
00:55:50,283 --> 00:55:52,651
You have to grab that bull
by his horn, eh?
1406
00:55:52,652 --> 00:55:53,619
You think so?
1407
00:55:53,620 --> 00:55:54,987
Oui, of course.
1408
00:55:54,988 --> 00:55:56,989
Look, when he comes out
of there,
1409
00:55:56,990 --> 00:55:59,224
you go to that bull,
you grab his horn,
1410
00:55:59,225 --> 00:56:01,293
and you tug this horn,
eh?
1411
00:56:01,294 --> 00:56:03,729
Oh, thanks, Laurent.
1412
00:56:03,730 --> 00:56:05,297
You're a really good friend.
1413
00:56:05,298 --> 00:56:07,199
No problem, Mia Ho.
1414
00:56:07,200 --> 00:56:10,102
There is a very romantic spot
just this way
1415
00:56:10,103 --> 00:56:11,603
overlooking the river.
1416
00:56:11,604 --> 00:56:13,138
Oh, awesome.
1417
00:56:13,139 --> 00:56:14,039
Yes, very nice.
1418
00:56:16,676 --> 00:56:17,676
Hi, Dave.
1419
00:56:18,845 --> 00:56:22,781
I will leave you two alone
for a moment.
1420
00:56:22,782 --> 00:56:25,117
Hey, let's go
take a walk.
1421
00:56:25,118 --> 00:56:27,486
Actually, Laurent and I,
we were just about--oh.
1422
00:56:27,487 --> 00:56:29,521
No, thanks, Ganja.
1423
00:56:29,522 --> 00:56:30,656
That's the devil's juice.
1424
00:56:30,657 --> 00:56:32,057
That alcohol stuff
will mess up your brain, man.
1425
00:56:33,426 --> 00:56:34,460
Yeah,
1426
00:56:34,461 --> 00:56:35,561
I guess you're right.
1427
00:56:38,498 --> 00:56:40,432
Robin, are you okay?
1428
00:56:40,433 --> 00:56:41,934
Yeah, I'm fine. Why?
1429
00:56:41,935 --> 00:56:43,602
Oh, I just can't believe Dave
1430
00:56:43,603 --> 00:56:46,005
would leave you
out here all alone.
1431
00:56:46,006 --> 00:56:47,806
He said
he was coming right back.
1432
00:56:47,807 --> 00:56:49,074
Mm.
1433
00:56:51,311 --> 00:56:54,947
So there's something
I've been meaning to tell you.
1434
00:56:54,948 --> 00:56:56,281
Laurent told me
how you feel.
1435
00:56:56,282 --> 00:56:57,850
Laurent--
wait, Laurent what?
1436
00:56:57,851 --> 00:57:00,352
You know,
Dave is my friend and all,
1437
00:57:00,353 --> 00:57:05,124
but sometimes
he says things which--
1438
00:57:05,125 --> 00:57:06,892
oh, never mind.
1439
00:57:06,893 --> 00:57:08,093
Now, what is it, Laurent?
1440
00:57:08,094 --> 00:57:10,195
Sometimes Dave says things
about women
1441
00:57:10,196 --> 00:57:15,167
which I find
so objectifying, eh?
1442
00:57:15,168 --> 00:57:16,168
Dave?
1443
00:57:17,170 --> 00:57:18,804
Laurent, you're crazy.
1444
00:57:18,805 --> 00:57:22,074
Dave's the sweetest guy
that I know.
1445
00:57:22,075 --> 00:57:25,911
Well, perhaps you don't know him
too well, eh?
1446
00:57:25,912 --> 00:57:27,279
Wait, what did he say?
1447
00:57:27,280 --> 00:57:29,615
How you wanted to get me
out here all alone
1448
00:57:29,616 --> 00:57:31,550
and how you were too shy to.
1449
00:57:31,551 --> 00:57:32,618
Um, listen, Mia--
1450
00:57:37,157 --> 00:57:38,090
Dave?
1451
00:57:44,030 --> 00:57:46,865
No--Robin! Robin! Robin!
1452
00:57:46,866 --> 00:57:49,134
Don't leave me, Dave!
1453
00:57:49,135 --> 00:57:51,203
Not like this.
1454
00:57:51,204 --> 00:57:53,939
Robin.
1455
00:57:53,940 --> 00:57:54,940
Robin, please.
1456
00:57:54,941 --> 00:57:56,141
Hey, please, stop.
1457
00:57:56,142 --> 00:57:58,377
Listen, I'm sorry okay?
I just--
1458
00:57:58,378 --> 00:58:00,679
No, you have nothing
to be sorry about, Dave.
1459
00:58:00,680 --> 00:58:02,815
Just go have fun
with Mia Ho--
1460
00:58:02,816 --> 00:58:05,317
or your ho
or whose ever ho she is.
1461
00:58:05,318 --> 00:58:09,088
Just don't ask me to wait
in the woods for you, okay?
1462
00:58:09,089 --> 00:58:10,889
I understand that,
but you got to understand;
1463
00:58:10,890 --> 00:58:12,524
listen, she pulled me
into the woods, okay?
1464
00:58:12,525 --> 00:58:13,592
And she--
1465
00:58:13,593 --> 00:58:15,361
That's just bad form,
Dave.
1466
00:58:15,362 --> 00:58:17,162
Come, Robin,
for a walk.
1467
00:58:19,399 --> 00:58:22,668
We were still talking.
1468
00:58:25,805 --> 00:58:26,805
Oh, hey, son.
1469
00:58:26,806 --> 00:58:27,806
Hi, Dad.
1470
00:58:27,807 --> 00:58:29,808
Wait, wait, wait.
Come here.
1471
00:58:29,809 --> 00:58:30,676
So...
1472
00:58:32,612 --> 00:58:33,579
Tell me about it.
1473
00:58:33,580 --> 00:58:34,613
Did you
1474
00:58:34,614 --> 00:58:36,181
Get a car?
1475
00:58:36,182 --> 00:58:37,983
I don't drive.
1476
00:58:37,984 --> 00:58:42,254
You know, a car
with a working engine?
1477
00:58:42,255 --> 00:58:43,756
You know?
1478
00:58:43,757 --> 00:58:46,191
No, you know, a car.
1479
00:58:47,660 --> 00:58:49,728
A car
that you could have sex with?
1480
00:58:49,729 --> 00:58:54,633
Oh, um, about that, Dad,
1481
00:58:54,634 --> 00:58:55,701
I want a new car.
1482
00:58:55,702 --> 00:58:57,336
You know,
I don't want a used one.
1483
00:58:57,337 --> 00:59:00,305
And to be honest with you,
it seems like all the new ones
1484
00:59:00,306 --> 00:59:02,274
are not for sale.
1485
00:59:02,275 --> 00:59:04,343
Wait, what do you mean,
is it--
1486
00:59:04,344 --> 00:59:06,145
Here you go, bro.
1487
00:59:06,146 --> 00:59:07,146
What's up, Marv?
1488
00:59:07,147 --> 00:59:08,313
Hey.
- Oh!
1489
00:59:08,314 --> 00:59:10,315
I got to tell you,
my friend,
1490
00:59:10,316 --> 00:59:12,484
I think I mastered
the Pittsburgh Platter.
1491
00:59:12,485 --> 00:59:14,653
Boom!
- Oh!
1492
00:59:14,654 --> 00:59:15,821
Master it.
1493
00:59:15,822 --> 00:59:17,289
That's right.
You better believe it.
1494
00:59:17,290 --> 00:59:18,490
Tell me about it.
1495
00:59:18,491 --> 00:59:20,459
We're gonna save that
one for later, not now.
1496
00:59:20,460 --> 00:59:21,460
Dad.
1497
00:59:21,461 --> 00:59:22,461
Okay.
- Later, Marv.
1498
00:59:22,462 --> 00:59:23,529
Later, all right?
1499
00:59:23,530 --> 00:59:24,596
I want to hear
all about it.
1500
00:59:24,597 --> 00:59:25,764
Yeah, you will.
1501
00:59:25,765 --> 00:59:28,067
No, just go. Just go.
1502
00:59:28,068 --> 00:59:30,936
Hey, did you get peanut butter
in my sleeping bag?
1503
00:59:30,937 --> 00:59:33,372
Will the following
students please report
1504
00:59:33,373 --> 00:59:36,041
to Miss Lonnatini's office
immediately:
1505
00:59:36,042 --> 00:59:37,076
Dave Llennart,
1506
00:59:37,077 --> 00:59:38,410
Jay Noble,
1507
00:59:38,411 --> 00:59:39,478
Hashime Brown,
1508
00:59:39,479 --> 00:59:41,380
and Gordon Lally.
1509
00:59:41,381 --> 00:59:43,248
That is all.
1510
00:59:45,218 --> 00:59:46,385
Yo.
1511
00:59:46,386 --> 00:59:48,420
Gordon, Gordon, Gordon.
1512
00:59:48,421 --> 00:59:49,755
Got you a gift.
1513
00:59:52,459 --> 00:59:55,027
I got for you because you've
really hit
1514
00:59:55,028 --> 00:59:56,762
a grand slam.
1515
00:59:56,763 --> 00:59:57,830
You've really kicked it
1516
00:59:57,831 --> 00:59:59,531
through the uprights
this semester.
1517
01:00:00,700 --> 01:00:03,435
Thanks, I've been working
really hard.
1518
01:00:03,436 --> 01:00:04,770
You can tell.
1519
01:00:06,740 --> 01:00:10,242
Your Spanish this year
has just been unfaltering.
1520
01:00:10,243 --> 01:00:13,145
It's been so good
1521
01:00:13,146 --> 01:00:15,381
I guess I would have to say...
1522
01:00:21,755 --> 01:00:22,988
Oui, oui.
1523
01:00:22,989 --> 01:00:25,190
Yeah.
1524
01:00:25,191 --> 01:00:27,926
And I think what's blown me away
most this semester though
1525
01:00:27,927 --> 01:00:32,998
is that paper that you wrote
for your economics class.
1526
01:00:32,999 --> 01:00:35,367
Legalization
1527
01:00:35,368 --> 01:00:37,336
and Globalization:
1528
01:00:37,337 --> 01:00:40,005
A Necessity
for the American Economy.
1529
01:00:40,006 --> 01:00:44,009
Wow, that is really something.
1530
01:00:44,010 --> 01:00:45,177
Good job, Shantz,
1531
01:00:45,178 --> 01:00:46,679
Unbelievable.
1532
01:00:46,680 --> 01:00:48,514
I remember this one.
1533
01:00:48,515 --> 01:00:49,581
Oh, do you?
1534
01:00:49,582 --> 01:00:50,716
"Shantz."
1535
01:00:50,717 --> 01:00:54,420
You are a lying, cheating
little bitch.
1536
01:00:54,421 --> 01:00:58,023
And you got your little bastard
flying monkey friends
1537
01:00:58,024 --> 01:00:59,692
to help you cheat.
1538
01:00:59,693 --> 01:01:02,728
And lucky for you,
I can't prove that.
1539
01:01:02,729 --> 01:01:05,831
But what I can do is,
I can base your grades
1540
01:01:05,832 --> 01:01:07,933
solely on your finals.
1541
01:01:07,934 --> 01:01:10,235
Yeah,
oh, you look worried.
1542
01:01:10,236 --> 01:01:12,404
I wouldn't worry about cheating,
1543
01:01:12,405 --> 01:01:14,807
because I made up a new test
1544
01:01:14,808 --> 01:01:17,509
especially just for you.
1545
01:01:17,510 --> 01:01:18,677
That's right.
1546
01:01:18,678 --> 01:01:21,180
So have fun
at the dance tonight.
1547
01:01:31,224 --> 01:01:32,591
Hell yeah.
1548
01:01:32,592 --> 01:01:33,892
Nice.
1549
01:01:33,893 --> 01:01:35,394
No, I think
this looks great.
1550
01:01:35,395 --> 01:01:38,464
# it's a daydream
dipped in benzine #
1551
01:01:38,465 --> 01:01:43,335
# it's a medicated frenzy #
1552
01:01:43,336 --> 01:01:44,603
Robin?
1553
01:01:44,604 --> 01:01:46,405
Yeah, it's kind of
a little gift for her.
1554
01:01:46,406 --> 01:01:48,107
Time to get ready, brother.
1555
01:01:52,512 --> 01:01:54,780
Okay, one, two, three.
1556
01:01:56,349 --> 01:01:59,718
So where's Robin?
1557
01:01:59,719 --> 01:02:00,719
I don't know, man.
1558
01:02:00,720 --> 01:02:02,688
Where's Anita?
1559
01:02:02,689 --> 01:02:04,490
What do you mean?
1560
01:02:04,491 --> 01:02:06,191
I'm just wondering.
1561
01:02:06,192 --> 01:02:07,559
I don't know.
1562
01:02:07,560 --> 01:02:10,796
Probably with some guy,
some museum guy.
1563
01:02:10,797 --> 01:02:12,131
I don't know.
I don't care.
1564
01:02:12,132 --> 01:02:13,499
You know?
1565
01:02:13,500 --> 01:02:14,900
I don't care.
1566
01:02:14,901 --> 01:02:16,535
Whatever you say, man.
1567
01:02:16,536 --> 01:02:18,137
If you don't care,
I don't care.
1568
01:02:18,138 --> 01:02:19,805
Right on.
1569
01:02:19,806 --> 01:02:21,273
Right on.
1570
01:02:21,274 --> 01:02:22,341
Don't care.
1571
01:02:47,434 --> 01:02:48,901
And the messed up thing
about it, man,
1572
01:02:48,902 --> 01:02:53,706
is I really like hamburgers.
1573
01:02:53,707 --> 01:02:56,141
I really like hamburgers.
1574
01:02:56,142 --> 01:03:01,280
Dude, did you guys know
that we bombed Japan twice?
1575
01:03:01,281 --> 01:03:03,449
God, that's really messed up,
man.
1576
01:03:03,450 --> 01:03:05,150
Just wait till you get
to chapter nine, man.
1577
01:03:05,151 --> 01:03:08,887
We do some shit
in the '60s.
1578
01:03:08,888 --> 01:03:11,090
# let's take a ride in my car #
1579
01:03:11,091 --> 01:03:14,159
# hey, shorty, how's it feel
to ride with a star? #
1580
01:03:14,160 --> 01:03:16,095
# if you want to ride,
let's roll #
1581
01:03:16,096 --> 01:03:18,464
# you know I got time
so hop inside #
1582
01:03:18,465 --> 01:03:19,465
# let's go cruisin'#
1583
01:03:19,466 --> 01:03:21,033
# let's take a ride in my car #
1584
01:03:21,034 --> 01:03:22,901
Hi, Ganja.
1585
01:03:22,902 --> 01:03:24,103
Hi.
1586
01:03:24,104 --> 01:03:25,971
Where did you learn
to do that?
1587
01:03:25,972 --> 01:03:27,806
I watch a lot of B.E.T.
1588
01:03:27,807 --> 01:03:29,074
Oh.
1589
01:03:29,075 --> 01:03:30,709
Do you--
do you want to dance?
1590
01:03:30,710 --> 01:03:33,178
Okay.
1591
01:03:35,515 --> 01:03:37,583
Hey.
1592
01:03:37,584 --> 01:03:39,051
Do you think
we could talk for a second?
1593
01:03:39,052 --> 01:03:40,586
Yeah.
1594
01:03:40,587 --> 01:03:42,921
I get it,
you and Mia.
1595
01:03:42,922 --> 01:03:44,256
She has a great rack.
1596
01:03:44,257 --> 01:03:46,258
I get it,
so don't worry.
1597
01:03:46,259 --> 01:03:47,926
What? Me and Mia?
1598
01:03:47,927 --> 01:03:48,927
Mm-hmm.
1599
01:03:48,928 --> 01:03:51,096
Robin, it's--
- What?
1600
01:03:51,097 --> 01:03:53,332
Robin, I don't like Mia.
1601
01:03:53,333 --> 01:03:54,333
When we went camping,
1602
01:03:54,334 --> 01:03:55,701
she was attacking me
in the woods.
1603
01:03:55,702 --> 01:03:57,036
She attacked you?
1604
01:03:57,037 --> 01:03:59,038
Yes, that's--
1605
01:03:59,039 --> 01:04:00,639
listen, I don't feel
like you believe me.
1606
01:04:00,640 --> 01:04:03,242
And I'm not so great
at explaining how I feel,
1607
01:04:03,243 --> 01:04:05,310
so do you mind just listening
to a song that I brought?
1608
01:04:05,311 --> 01:04:06,979
I think
it explains everything.
1609
01:04:06,980 --> 01:04:08,213
Yeah.
1610
01:04:09,315 --> 01:04:10,716
Yo.
1611
01:04:21,227 --> 01:04:23,395
# ice cold bitches
here comes the heat wave #
1612
01:04:23,396 --> 01:04:25,698
# only eat pussy
that rock the clean shave #
1613
01:04:25,699 --> 01:04:26,732
What are you trying to say,
Dave?
1614
01:04:28,868 --> 01:04:30,302
Yo, bro,
this isn't the song--
1615
01:04:30,303 --> 01:04:32,338
You know what, Dave,
it's okay.
1616
01:04:32,339 --> 01:04:34,907
I don't need to be objectified
by you.
1617
01:04:34,908 --> 01:04:35,741
Robin.
1618
01:04:37,777 --> 01:04:40,412
Dave, why you keep screwing up
with Robin?
1619
01:04:40,413 --> 01:04:41,647
You do this on purpose, eh?
1620
01:04:41,648 --> 01:04:43,816
No, man, this fucking guy
back here.
1621
01:04:43,817 --> 01:04:46,251
It's the wrong song.
1622
01:04:46,252 --> 01:04:47,252
She looks upset.
1623
01:04:47,253 --> 01:04:48,754
I will go help her.
1624
01:04:50,557 --> 01:04:52,257
Hey, bro,
1625
01:04:52,258 --> 01:04:54,293
that was the wrong song.
1626
01:04:54,294 --> 01:04:55,561
Are you okay?
1627
01:04:55,562 --> 01:04:57,162
I want you to play
the right song.
1628
01:04:57,163 --> 01:04:58,230
It's the gold one.
1629
01:04:58,231 --> 01:04:59,932
It says, like, "I heart Robin"
or "I love"--
1630
01:04:59,933 --> 01:05:01,000
All right, man,
all right.
1631
01:05:01,001 --> 01:05:02,001
It's--
- all right.
1632
01:05:02,002 --> 01:05:03,569
Oh, you put it--
yeah, you already put it
1633
01:05:03,570 --> 01:05:04,870
On your computer;
I know you did.
1634
01:05:06,272 --> 01:05:09,274
Thank you so--
1635
01:05:13,580 --> 01:05:17,383
You know, man,
never mind, never mind.
1636
01:05:17,384 --> 01:05:18,851
I...
1637
01:05:18,852 --> 01:05:21,720
I want you to know,
I respect our friendship
1638
01:05:21,721 --> 01:05:26,759
and consider us to be,
how you say, best buds.
1639
01:05:26,760 --> 01:05:28,193
Thanks, Laurent.
1640
01:05:28,194 --> 01:05:29,795
I could really use a friend
right now.
1641
01:05:32,665 --> 01:05:34,466
What are you doing?
1642
01:05:34,467 --> 01:05:36,168
What?
1643
01:05:36,169 --> 01:05:38,437
You just finished telling me
what good friends we are.
1644
01:05:38,438 --> 01:05:40,205
Oui, sure we're friends,
1645
01:05:40,206 --> 01:05:41,807
friends who fuck is all.
1646
01:05:44,944 --> 01:05:47,713
Bitch.
1647
01:05:47,714 --> 01:05:50,649
# every dance on the floor
is a quick glance #
1648
01:05:50,650 --> 01:05:52,484
# now stop, stand still,
drink a pole #
1649
01:05:52,485 --> 01:05:54,653
# and freeze, froze,
freeze-frame #
1650
01:05:54,654 --> 01:05:56,355
# he's a pro
she's for sho' #
1651
01:05:56,356 --> 01:05:57,489
# but he's lame #
1652
01:05:57,490 --> 01:05:59,591
# it's like we do best #
1653
01:05:59,592 --> 01:06:02,394
# coming all the way
from the U.S. To japan #
1654
01:06:02,395 --> 01:06:05,531
# overseas, I oversee
who knows is me #
1655
01:06:05,532 --> 01:06:07,266
# this is the man #
1656
01:06:13,273 --> 01:06:20,779
Anita, I--
I haven't seen you all night.
1657
01:06:20,780 --> 01:06:24,350
Hey, what's wrong?
1658
01:06:24,351 --> 01:06:25,851
Museum guy?
1659
01:06:28,355 --> 01:06:30,689
You want me to get Shantz
to kick his ass?
1660
01:06:31,991 --> 01:06:33,859
Shut up, Jay.
1661
01:06:35,895 --> 01:06:38,130
You know, I'm glad
he's not here,
1662
01:06:38,131 --> 01:06:40,866
because if he were,
then you would be with him
1663
01:06:40,867 --> 01:06:44,370
and not with me.
1664
01:06:46,906 --> 01:06:49,141
You want to go home?
1665
01:06:49,142 --> 01:06:52,044
Yeah.
1666
01:06:52,045 --> 01:06:54,380
That would be really nice.
1667
01:07:13,733 --> 01:07:16,035
Dave, have you seen
my red shirt?
1668
01:07:16,036 --> 01:07:18,070
No. Hey, put out
that cigarette, okay?
1669
01:07:18,071 --> 01:07:19,071
We're not France.
1670
01:07:19,072 --> 01:07:20,072
My mom'll kill you.
1671
01:07:20,073 --> 01:07:22,241
Are you okay, Dave?
1672
01:07:22,242 --> 01:07:24,009
You're not still mad about me,
are you, Dave?
1673
01:07:24,010 --> 01:07:26,412
I don't want
to talk about it.
1674
01:07:26,413 --> 01:07:29,715
Dave, let me go
smooth things over with Robin.
1675
01:07:29,716 --> 01:07:31,283
She did not understand
what I was saying
1676
01:07:31,284 --> 01:07:32,284
at the dance last night.
1677
01:07:32,285 --> 01:07:33,585
I will ride with her
this morning
1678
01:07:33,586 --> 01:07:35,788
and explain everything.
1679
01:07:35,789 --> 01:07:37,423
Whatever.
1680
01:07:56,242 --> 01:07:57,910
See you guys.
1681
01:07:57,911 --> 01:07:59,244
See ya.
1682
01:08:11,725 --> 01:08:13,258
Do you think Laurent's
banging her?
1683
01:08:13,259 --> 01:08:16,228
No, but he's probably fucking
your mama.
1684
01:08:16,229 --> 01:08:18,230
Yeah, now you're getting it,
Ganja.
1685
01:08:18,231 --> 01:08:19,732
Dave, I'm telling you,
1686
01:08:19,733 --> 01:08:21,100
Mia Ho is the way to go.
1687
01:08:21,101 --> 01:08:22,301
I mean, come on, think about it.
1688
01:08:22,302 --> 01:08:23,469
You got to forget about Robin.
1689
01:08:23,470 --> 01:08:24,703
She's going to Colorado,
1690
01:08:24,704 --> 01:08:26,138
and we will be banging
all the women.
1691
01:08:26,139 --> 01:08:27,373
Am I right?
1692
01:08:27,374 --> 01:08:30,976
Yeah, but Robin is...
1693
01:08:38,151 --> 01:08:39,551
I was wrong, Dave.
1694
01:08:39,552 --> 01:08:41,754
I want to be objectified
by you.
1695
01:08:41,755 --> 01:08:43,322
Objectify us.
1696
01:08:43,323 --> 01:08:45,791
Hi, Dave.
1697
01:08:45,792 --> 01:08:48,694
Oh, oh, yeah.
1698
01:08:48,695 --> 01:08:49,795
I tried.
1699
01:08:49,796 --> 01:08:53,132
She is very much being a bitch.
1700
01:08:53,133 --> 01:08:55,501
You look like shit, Dave.
1701
01:08:55,502 --> 01:08:58,037
Look, guys, I'm gonna have
my mom take me in a little bit.
1702
01:08:58,038 --> 01:08:59,505
I got to--
I'm not ready for that quiz.
1703
01:08:59,506 --> 01:09:03,976
So see you at school.
1704
01:09:03,977 --> 01:09:05,644
Oh.
1705
01:09:21,461 --> 01:09:23,829
Guys--
oh, I'm sorry.
1706
01:09:23,830 --> 01:09:25,564
I can't find Robin's box.
1707
01:09:26,700 --> 01:09:27,700
I know, Dave,
1708
01:09:27,701 --> 01:09:29,234
but listen,
what you got to do
1709
01:09:29,235 --> 01:09:30,669
is just take it easy.
1710
01:09:30,670 --> 01:09:32,037
No, no, not--
1711
01:09:32,038 --> 01:09:33,038
Fucking idiot.
1712
01:09:33,039 --> 01:09:35,040
Not, not Robin's box.
1713
01:09:35,041 --> 01:09:37,476
Oh, the Robin box.
1714
01:09:37,477 --> 01:09:38,711
I thought you meant Robin's box.
1715
01:09:38,712 --> 01:09:39,712
No.
1716
01:09:39,713 --> 01:09:40,746
The--the--
1717
01:09:40,747 --> 01:09:42,848
Can you guys come
help me find it please?
1718
01:09:42,849 --> 01:09:44,683
I smell french toast.
1719
01:09:46,953 --> 01:09:49,221
Maybe I got this all wrong.
Maybe he didn't take it.
1720
01:09:49,222 --> 01:09:52,124
Are you sure you didn't just
misplace it somewhere?
1721
01:09:52,125 --> 01:09:53,125
Yeah, I'm pretty sure.
1722
01:09:53,126 --> 01:09:54,360
I mean, I keep it in my room,
1723
01:09:54,361 --> 01:09:56,295
and my searched my room
pretty well this morning.
1724
01:09:56,296 --> 01:09:58,997
Maybe your mom took it.
1725
01:09:58,998 --> 01:10:00,399
Oh, shit.
1726
01:10:00,400 --> 01:10:02,801
She was supposed to clean
my room this morning.
1727
01:10:02,802 --> 01:10:04,336
I'm sorry, guys.
1728
01:10:04,337 --> 01:10:06,138
Why didn't you
think about that before?
1729
01:10:06,139 --> 01:10:07,406
It didn't occur to me.
1730
01:10:07,407 --> 01:10:08,707
Fuck.
1731
01:10:08,708 --> 01:10:09,808
It's okay.
It's okay, dude.
1732
01:10:09,809 --> 01:10:11,343
Just call your mom
and make sure.
1733
01:10:11,344 --> 01:10:13,512
And next time, Dave,
think before you freak out.
1734
01:10:13,513 --> 01:10:14,646
I will. I'm sorry.
1735
01:10:14,647 --> 01:10:16,081
I'm really embarrassed
about this.
1736
01:10:16,082 --> 01:10:17,082
I'm sorry.
1737
01:10:17,083 --> 01:10:18,083
For a split second there,
1738
01:10:18,084 --> 01:10:19,084
I could've sworn--
1739
01:10:19,085 --> 01:10:20,953
I could've sworn that--
1740
01:10:20,954 --> 01:10:23,122
Oh, dude,
you should probably...
1741
01:10:23,123 --> 01:10:24,123
Oh, yeah, sorry.
1742
01:10:25,458 --> 01:10:28,027
Okay, okay, I'm sorry.
1743
01:10:28,028 --> 01:10:31,163
I took it to Robin's house
this morning to embarrass you.
1744
01:10:31,164 --> 01:10:32,164
She was not there.
1745
01:10:32,165 --> 01:10:33,799
I left it on the porch.
1746
01:10:33,800 --> 01:10:35,768
What? You did what?
1747
01:10:35,769 --> 01:10:36,869
Are you fucking crazy?
1748
01:10:36,870 --> 01:10:38,303
She's gonna think
I'm insane.
1749
01:10:38,304 --> 01:10:39,972
What the hell's
the matter with you?
1750
01:10:39,973 --> 01:10:41,440
Oh, my god,
he's been sabotaging me
1751
01:10:41,441 --> 01:10:42,775
this whole time, haven't you?
1752
01:10:42,776 --> 01:10:44,109
Oh, my god.
1753
01:10:44,110 --> 01:10:46,045
I brought you
all the way from France.
1754
01:10:46,046 --> 01:10:47,913
You come,
and you live in my house,
1755
01:10:47,914 --> 01:10:50,883
and you--
you make me shave my balls.
1756
01:10:50,884 --> 01:10:52,651
And then you made me
put peanut butter on my balls.
1757
01:10:52,652 --> 01:10:54,286
And then you stole
my girl's box.
1758
01:10:54,287 --> 01:10:55,320
Dude, wait, wait,
1759
01:10:55,321 --> 01:10:57,189
you shaved your balls?
1760
01:10:57,190 --> 01:10:58,257
Doesn't that itch?
1761
01:10:58,258 --> 01:11:00,225
And you put peanut butter
on your balls?
1762
01:11:00,226 --> 01:11:01,660
What the hell's the matter
with you?
1763
01:11:01,661 --> 01:11:02,895
He told me it would work.
1764
01:11:02,896 --> 01:11:03,896
I was jealous, Dave.
1765
01:11:03,897 --> 01:11:04,897
Jealous?
1766
01:11:04,898 --> 01:11:06,699
Yes.
1767
01:11:06,700 --> 01:11:08,200
You have everything here.
1768
01:11:08,201 --> 01:11:12,371
I live with your family,
but they're not my family.
1769
01:11:12,372 --> 01:11:16,475
I hang out with your friends,
but they're not my friends.
1770
01:11:16,476 --> 01:11:19,678
And Robin--
I couldn't help myself.
1771
01:11:19,679 --> 01:11:21,513
She's a virgin, Dave.
1772
01:11:21,514 --> 01:11:23,449
And I thought she like me.
1773
01:11:23,450 --> 01:11:25,651
But she really likes you, Dave.
1774
01:11:25,652 --> 01:11:28,053
You're all she talks about,
1775
01:11:28,054 --> 01:11:30,122
Dave this and Dave that.
1776
01:11:30,123 --> 01:11:32,791
You're the one
she really loves, Dave.
1777
01:11:34,594 --> 01:11:36,829
I am sorry, Dave.
1778
01:11:36,830 --> 01:11:40,132
But I promise, I will spend
all my time left in America
1779
01:11:40,133 --> 01:11:41,834
trying to make things better.
1780
01:11:41,835 --> 01:11:44,336
No, you know what, just don't
do a damn thing, Laurent.
1781
01:11:44,337 --> 01:11:45,337
You've done enough.
1782
01:11:45,338 --> 01:11:47,339
From now on, it's my way.
1783
01:11:47,340 --> 01:11:48,273
I'll see you guys later.
1784
01:11:52,078 --> 01:11:55,981
Hm, looks like
our little boy's grown up.
1785
01:11:55,982 --> 01:11:56,982
Wow.
1786
01:11:56,983 --> 01:11:58,283
Yes.
1787
01:11:58,284 --> 01:11:59,852
It would seem the little man--
1788
01:11:59,853 --> 01:12:00,853
Hey, shut up, Laurent.
1789
01:12:00,854 --> 01:12:02,821
Okay.
1790
01:12:12,198 --> 01:12:14,500
Robin, why couldn't we have
just taken the final exam
1791
01:12:14,501 --> 01:12:16,835
like everyone else?
1792
01:12:16,836 --> 01:12:19,905
The frog is just laying there
like he's gonna--
1793
01:12:19,906 --> 01:12:23,375
And the smell is just--
1794
01:12:23,376 --> 01:12:25,344
Are we done yet?
1795
01:12:28,281 --> 01:12:30,749
Yes, we're done.
1796
01:12:30,750 --> 01:12:36,555
And it kind of has a smell
like a cherry tree with manure.
1797
01:12:36,556 --> 01:12:39,525
It's not that bad.
1798
01:12:39,526 --> 01:12:40,959
Dave?
1799
01:12:40,960 --> 01:12:43,295
The fuck is this?
1800
01:12:44,431 --> 01:12:45,798
Listen, Robin,
I'm sorry.
1801
01:12:45,799 --> 01:12:47,132
I'm sorry.
1802
01:12:47,133 --> 01:12:50,736
Robin, I'm sorry about the box,
okay?
1803
01:12:50,737 --> 01:12:52,638
I--I--
it's not what you think.
1804
01:12:52,639 --> 01:12:55,841
Really, I mean, I told Laurent
never to touch--
1805
01:12:55,842 --> 01:12:57,276
never to touch your box, right?
1806
01:12:57,277 --> 01:13:01,714
And then, of course, he does.
1807
01:13:01,715 --> 01:13:03,916
You know what,
it's not that I'm psycho really,
1808
01:13:03,917 --> 01:13:04,917
because I just--
1809
01:13:04,918 --> 01:13:06,585
I made it for you
a long time ago,
1810
01:13:06,586 --> 01:13:08,387
And I was--every year,
I planned on, you know,
1811
01:13:08,388 --> 01:13:09,455
just giving it to you.
1812
01:13:09,456 --> 01:13:10,656
And then I just--
I don't know.
1813
01:13:10,657 --> 01:13:11,957
I ended up keeping it
for myself.
1814
01:13:11,958 --> 01:13:13,859
Dave, Dave,
slow down.
1815
01:13:18,064 --> 01:13:20,099
Listen, Robin,
I know--
1816
01:13:20,100 --> 01:13:23,335
I know that I've never been good
at telling you how I feel.
1817
01:13:23,336 --> 01:13:24,336
That's pretty obvious.
1818
01:13:24,337 --> 01:13:25,771
It's just--
1819
01:13:25,772 --> 01:13:28,140
Oh, it doesn't matter.
1820
01:13:28,141 --> 01:13:29,208
The thing with Mia and me,
1821
01:13:29,209 --> 01:13:29,908
it was just--
1822
01:13:36,883 --> 01:13:39,118
Do you ever notice
that when you're around,
1823
01:13:39,119 --> 01:13:41,387
something bad
always happens?
1824
01:13:41,388 --> 01:13:42,454
Look, I'm sorry about that.
1825
01:13:42,455 --> 01:13:43,455
Here.
1826
01:13:43,456 --> 01:13:45,924
Please don't.
1827
01:13:52,432 --> 01:13:53,432
That was great.
1828
01:13:53,433 --> 01:13:54,433
Perfect timing.
1829
01:13:54,434 --> 01:13:55,901
You could've puked on Jez,
all right?
1830
01:13:55,902 --> 01:13:57,436
She likes that, I heard.
1831
01:14:00,473 --> 01:14:02,441
I puked.
1832
01:14:02,442 --> 01:14:03,942
I'm Jez.
1833
01:14:09,516 --> 01:14:13,585
Listen, Robin,
I know you're mad right now,
1834
01:14:13,586 --> 01:14:15,454
and I understand, okay, but...
1835
01:14:17,290 --> 01:14:19,358
Look, I have to tell you,
1836
01:14:19,359 --> 01:14:20,559
I've been listening
1837
01:14:20,560 --> 01:14:22,261
to what everybody else
has been telling me,
1838
01:14:22,262 --> 01:14:25,864
and you know,
I tried playing it cool.
1839
01:14:25,865 --> 01:14:27,333
I even tried playing
a romantic song,
1840
01:14:27,334 --> 01:14:32,271
but that backfired.
1841
01:14:32,272 --> 01:14:34,773
I shaved my balls.
1842
01:14:34,774 --> 01:14:39,645
I shaved my balls for you,
Robin.
1843
01:14:39,646 --> 01:14:41,814
And honestly
I just haven't been listening
1844
01:14:41,815 --> 01:14:43,015
to what my heart's been saying.
1845
01:14:43,016 --> 01:14:49,521
And the truth is
that I love you.
1846
01:14:49,522 --> 01:14:52,691
I love you so much
that I can't explain it,
1847
01:14:52,692 --> 01:14:54,626
And I want to be with you so bad
1848
01:14:54,627 --> 01:14:58,664
that I'm standing in the hallway
right now covered in vomit,
1849
01:14:58,665 --> 01:15:01,100
surrounded by a bunch of people,
1850
01:15:01,101 --> 01:15:02,434
professing my love to a door,
1851
01:15:02,435 --> 01:15:04,636
and it's really not exactly
now I planned on--
1852
01:15:07,140 --> 01:15:08,007
Forget it.
1853
01:15:11,311 --> 01:15:17,516
That's very sweet, Dave,
but you can't afford me.
1854
01:15:17,517 --> 01:15:18,517
Clean up your vomit.
1855
01:15:25,625 --> 01:15:35,434
# far away from now on
looking back is so hard #
1856
01:15:35,435 --> 01:15:39,038
# useless and misled #
1857
01:15:39,039 --> 01:15:40,339
No, you hang up.
1858
01:15:40,340 --> 01:15:45,010
# broken before
you could start #
1859
01:15:45,011 --> 01:15:49,515
# forget about what's innocent #
1860
01:15:49,516 --> 01:15:53,986
# and laying beneath
all the stars #
1861
01:15:53,987 --> 01:15:58,891
# 'cause I see what's in you #
1862
01:15:58,892 --> 01:16:03,996
# I believe you will too #
1863
01:16:03,997 --> 01:16:08,667
# it's time to go, time to go
your own way #
1864
01:16:08,668 --> 01:16:13,906
# it's time to go, time to go
your own way #
1865
01:16:13,907 --> 01:16:21,513
# it's time to go, time to go
find your place #
1866
01:16:21,514 --> 01:16:26,585
# forward from what's lost #
1867
01:16:26,586 --> 01:16:31,457
# moving past where you are #
1868
01:16:31,458 --> 01:16:33,225
The blowout
to end all blowouts.
1869
01:16:33,226 --> 01:16:34,226
Yes, sir.
1870
01:16:34,227 --> 01:16:35,861
Biga tasko.
1871
01:16:35,862 --> 01:16:38,263
Man, we got to find a way
to play this damn tape.
1872
01:16:38,264 --> 01:16:41,066
Hey, hey.
1873
01:16:41,067 --> 01:16:42,434
What's the news, dude?
Tell me.
1874
01:16:45,872 --> 01:16:47,139
I say we need a party.
1875
01:16:47,140 --> 01:16:48,507
Come on, there's no test
1876
01:16:48,508 --> 01:16:49,508
that Shantz can't ace.
1877
01:16:49,509 --> 01:16:50,876
All right, guys.
1878
01:16:50,877 --> 01:16:51,877
Party starts at 10:00.
1879
01:16:51,878 --> 01:16:55,547
You best be drunk by then.
1880
01:16:55,548 --> 01:16:59,651
# maybe I just don't
understand you anymore #
1881
01:16:59,652 --> 01:17:04,656
# you won't remember
how I feel today #
1882
01:17:04,657 --> 01:17:08,694
# I still remember
every one of the good days #
1883
01:17:08,695 --> 01:17:12,631
# but I know it seems
like we're losing time #
1884
01:17:14,401 --> 01:17:15,534
What are you doing?
1885
01:17:15,535 --> 01:17:18,103
Yes, and I love you too.
1886
01:17:18,104 --> 01:17:20,172
Class of 2008.
1887
01:17:23,943 --> 01:17:28,881
After four years of classes,
tests, and studying,
1888
01:17:28,882 --> 01:17:30,949
I've come to realize
many, many things.
1889
01:17:30,950 --> 01:17:34,787
Number one, school is
1890
01:17:34,788 --> 01:17:37,956
bullshit!
1891
01:17:37,957 --> 01:17:39,692
Math is gay!
1892
01:17:39,693 --> 01:17:40,693
That's right, buddy.
1893
01:17:40,694 --> 01:17:42,761
Math is gay.
1894
01:17:42,762 --> 01:17:44,096
But you know what's not gay?
1895
01:17:44,097 --> 01:17:45,097
Friendship.
1896
01:17:45,098 --> 01:17:47,266
Three cheers to that.
1897
01:17:47,267 --> 01:17:48,267
And I've come to learn
1898
01:17:48,268 --> 01:17:51,303
that loyalty is the most
important thing.
1899
01:17:51,304 --> 01:17:53,672
You can't teach loyalty, man.
1900
01:17:53,673 --> 01:17:56,241
You can't teach that.
1901
01:17:56,242 --> 01:17:59,011
So whether I've known you
for 18 years...
1902
01:18:01,014 --> 01:18:02,614
or just this year,
1903
01:18:02,615 --> 01:18:03,782
I want to let you know
1904
01:18:03,783 --> 01:18:05,317
that you always have
a place right here
1905
01:18:05,318 --> 01:18:06,518
in my heart.
1906
01:18:06,519 --> 01:18:07,986
Jay, have my baby!
1907
01:18:10,290 --> 01:18:12,991
Go, Lions!
1908
01:18:12,992 --> 01:18:15,094
Are you sure
that you don't want to go?
1909
01:18:15,095 --> 01:18:17,029
Yes, I'm sure.
1910
01:18:17,030 --> 01:18:19,665
I'm not going
to his stupid party.
1911
01:18:19,666 --> 01:18:20,933
Screw him.
1912
01:18:20,934 --> 01:18:23,802
I really think
you should go.
1913
01:18:23,803 --> 01:18:25,437
Come on,
Dave loves you.
1914
01:18:25,438 --> 01:18:26,805
You know that,
right?
1915
01:18:26,806 --> 01:18:29,475
I wish I had
someone like him.
1916
01:18:29,476 --> 01:18:34,847
But until then, I'm just gonna
keep doing what I'm doing best.
1917
01:18:34,848 --> 01:18:35,848
How do I look?
1918
01:18:35,849 --> 01:18:38,150
You're gonna have a great time.
1919
01:18:38,151 --> 01:18:40,085
Are you sure
you don't want to go?
1920
01:18:40,086 --> 01:18:41,854
Yes, go.
1921
01:18:41,855 --> 01:18:45,391
God, I'm fine.
1922
01:18:48,695 --> 01:18:50,362
Me fix movie.
1923
01:18:50,363 --> 01:18:51,864
Whoo!
1924
01:18:51,865 --> 01:18:53,265
We got vintage porn!
1925
01:18:53,266 --> 01:18:54,667
We got vintage porn!
1926
01:18:54,668 --> 01:18:55,768
I love you!
1927
01:18:55,769 --> 01:18:56,769
I love this guy!
1928
01:19:04,744 --> 01:19:06,779
Hey, guys.
1929
01:19:06,780 --> 01:19:08,814
What's going on, man?
1930
01:19:08,815 --> 01:19:09,815
What's up, bro?
1931
01:19:09,816 --> 01:19:12,117
Here, have my beer.
1932
01:19:12,118 --> 01:19:13,919
I'm just glad
to have you guys around.
1933
01:19:13,920 --> 01:19:14,920
It's really good to know
1934
01:19:14,921 --> 01:19:18,323
that the next four or five years
1935
01:19:18,324 --> 01:19:19,825
we'll all be together.
1936
01:19:19,826 --> 01:19:20,826
Next stop,
1937
01:19:20,827 --> 01:19:24,329
"O" State.
1938
01:19:24,330 --> 01:19:26,732
Actually, Dave...
1939
01:19:26,733 --> 01:19:28,100
What?
1940
01:19:29,436 --> 01:19:31,203
After 12 years of school, man,
1941
01:19:31,204 --> 01:19:33,105
I just don't think
I'm ready to go back yet.
1942
01:19:33,106 --> 01:19:36,608
And there are some places
outside of America
1943
01:19:36,609 --> 01:19:39,678
that I'd like
to see first.
1944
01:19:39,679 --> 01:19:42,014
Like Brazil.
1945
01:19:42,015 --> 01:19:43,282
That's great, man.
1946
01:19:43,283 --> 01:19:45,784
I'm so happy for you guys.
1947
01:19:45,785 --> 01:19:46,885
And at least I'll have
1948
01:19:46,886 --> 01:19:48,921
these two knuckleheads
with me, right?
1949
01:19:48,922 --> 01:19:50,255
M.I.T. offered me
a full ride.
1950
01:19:50,256 --> 01:19:53,859
I got to take it.
1951
01:19:53,860 --> 01:19:55,194
Wait, are you serious?
1952
01:19:55,195 --> 01:19:59,164
Yeah, it's what I want to do.
1953
01:19:59,165 --> 01:20:00,799
Cool, man.
1954
01:20:00,800 --> 01:20:03,135
Well, since we're on the topic,
Dave....
1955
01:20:05,205 --> 01:20:06,872
Sorry, buddy.
1956
01:20:06,873 --> 01:20:09,274
I'm just not that smart.
1957
01:20:09,275 --> 01:20:12,211
But I don't understand.
1958
01:20:12,212 --> 01:20:13,679
I know I said I aced it,
1959
01:20:13,680 --> 01:20:16,148
but I just wanted to make sure
we all had a good time tonight.
1960
01:20:19,019 --> 01:20:20,486
I get it.
1961
01:20:20,487 --> 01:20:21,954
You guys
are totally messing with me.
1962
01:20:21,955 --> 01:20:22,955
Don't do that, man.
1963
01:20:22,956 --> 01:20:23,956
Come on, let's--
1964
01:20:23,957 --> 01:20:25,991
Bro, we're not.
1965
01:20:25,992 --> 01:20:28,093
Sorry, man.
1966
01:20:28,094 --> 01:20:31,930
I mean, what happened
to friends forever
1967
01:20:31,931 --> 01:20:34,667
and all that shit, huh?
1968
01:20:34,668 --> 01:20:36,268
It's good to know.
1969
01:20:36,269 --> 01:20:37,169
See you guys later.
1970
01:20:39,839 --> 01:20:41,173
He took it all right.
1971
01:20:54,020 --> 01:20:55,454
How you doing, man?
1972
01:20:55,455 --> 01:20:57,990
Remember that time
we got really, really drunk
1973
01:20:57,991 --> 01:20:59,958
and took a piss
on that guy's car?
1974
01:20:59,959 --> 01:21:01,460
Yes.
1975
01:21:01,461 --> 01:21:03,195
I feel like the car.
1976
01:21:05,765 --> 01:21:07,166
It's not over, Dave.
1977
01:21:07,167 --> 01:21:09,134
I'm gonna come visit you,
bro.
1978
01:21:09,135 --> 01:21:10,135
Yeah, I know.
1979
01:21:10,136 --> 01:21:11,437
It's just, I don't know, man,
1980
01:21:11,438 --> 01:21:13,339
I thought things were supposed
to be different.
1981
01:21:13,340 --> 01:21:14,707
This isn't
how the story should end.
1982
01:21:20,246 --> 01:21:21,213
Nicely done.
1983
01:21:24,551 --> 01:21:25,551
Hi, Robin.
1984
01:21:25,552 --> 01:21:26,752
Thank you.
1985
01:21:26,753 --> 01:21:27,753
For what?
1986
01:21:27,754 --> 01:21:30,723
The pictures,
the letters.
1987
01:21:30,724 --> 01:21:33,692
My favorite lotion.
1988
01:21:33,693 --> 01:21:36,128
Dave, that's the sweetest thing
1989
01:21:36,129 --> 01:21:38,197
anyone's ever done for me.
1990
01:21:38,198 --> 01:21:39,598
I wish you would've told me
1991
01:21:39,599 --> 01:21:43,035
how you felt earlier.
1992
01:21:43,036 --> 01:21:45,771
Robin, listen,
I've been in love with you
1993
01:21:45,772 --> 01:21:47,706
since the fifth grade.
1994
01:21:50,010 --> 01:21:51,010
I got you a present.
1995
01:21:51,011 --> 01:21:55,014
The sock in the box
was gross.
1996
01:21:55,015 --> 01:21:56,248
So I got you these.
1997
01:21:58,451 --> 01:22:01,520
Um, thanks?
1998
01:22:01,521 --> 01:22:04,857
I mean, they're
a little gay though.
1999
01:22:04,858 --> 01:22:08,694
They're for me.
2000
01:22:08,695 --> 01:22:10,029
I want to spend
the next four years
2001
01:22:10,030 --> 01:22:11,764
making up
for the past seven.
2002
01:22:14,234 --> 01:22:18,137
I'd like that.
2003
01:22:18,138 --> 01:22:19,705
You know what?
2004
01:22:19,706 --> 01:22:20,639
Come with me.
2005
01:22:20,640 --> 01:22:22,274
Okay.
2006
01:22:22,275 --> 01:22:27,680
# now that you're far enough
behind me #
2007
01:22:27,681 --> 01:22:30,916
# I shake it off
and walk away #
2008
01:22:30,917 --> 01:22:33,585
# so I can breathe again #
2009
01:22:33,586 --> 01:22:39,558
# wake up these feelings
deep inside of me #
2010
01:22:39,559 --> 01:22:43,862
# I'm ever so used
to being lost #
2011
01:22:43,863 --> 01:22:46,465
# but now #
2012
01:22:46,466 --> 01:22:49,268
# I'm up
and I'm never coming down #
2013
01:22:49,269 --> 01:22:52,104
# don't think
that I'll ever hit the ground #
2014
01:22:52,105 --> 01:22:55,607
# die free
and I'm looking out for me #
2015
01:22:55,608 --> 01:22:57,576
# this time around #
2016
01:22:57,577 --> 01:23:00,846
# I'm up
and I'm never coming down #
2017
01:23:00,847 --> 01:23:03,382
# don't think that I'll ever hit
the ground #
2018
01:23:03,383 --> 01:23:07,252
# die free
and I'm looking out for me #
2019
01:23:07,253 --> 01:23:13,158
# this time around #
2020
01:23:13,159 --> 01:23:14,326
Hit it, big guy.
2021
01:23:14,327 --> 01:23:15,894
Oh, yes!
2022
01:23:15,895 --> 01:23:16,895
Bend her over!
2023
01:23:16,896 --> 01:23:17,896
Bend her over!
2024
01:23:17,897 --> 01:23:19,531
Whoo!
2025
01:23:19,532 --> 01:23:21,567
That's what you call
a manage a trois, frenchy.
2026
01:23:21,568 --> 01:23:22,568
That's what you call--
2027
01:23:22,569 --> 01:23:24,636
Whoa, whoa,
wait a minute.
2028
01:23:24,637 --> 01:23:27,072
Shantz, is that your dad?
2029
01:23:27,073 --> 01:23:28,807
Oh, my god.
2030
01:23:28,808 --> 01:23:30,442
What the hell
is he doing?
2031
01:23:31,444 --> 01:23:32,611
It's Long Larry.
2032
01:23:32,612 --> 01:23:34,013
Stop it, stop it, stop it.
2033
01:23:34,014 --> 01:23:35,014
Just cut it!
Just cut it!
2034
01:23:35,015 --> 01:23:36,015
Stop!
2035
01:23:36,016 --> 01:23:40,085
Turn it off!
2036
01:23:48,461 --> 01:23:53,832
# it's like I don't know
who you are #
2037
01:23:53,833 --> 01:23:55,367
# everyone changes #
2038
01:23:55,368 --> 01:23:58,103
# now you've gone
a bit too far #
2039
01:23:58,104 --> 01:24:01,907
# it just goes on and on
and I just can't hold on #
2040
01:24:01,908 --> 01:24:06,345
# this sounds like
my new favorite song #
2041
01:24:06,346 --> 01:24:09,014
# when it's blowing up
my radio #
2042
01:24:09,015 --> 01:24:12,418
# when I try to tune you out
but there's no doubt #
2043
01:24:12,419 --> 01:24:17,056
# you're gonna be stuck
inside my head #
2044
01:24:17,057 --> 01:24:20,192
# all over again #
2045
01:24:30,770 --> 01:24:36,075
# I'm sick
of everything I hear #
2046
01:24:36,076 --> 01:24:41,480
# wish I could close my eyes
and you just disappear #
2047
01:24:41,481 --> 01:24:46,819
# 'cause you always have to be
the star #
2048
01:24:46,820 --> 01:24:51,056
# but your sparkle fades
until I can't feel you anymore #
2049
01:24:51,057 --> 01:24:54,793
# it just goes on and on
and I just can't hold on #
2050
01:24:54,794 --> 01:24:59,331
# this sounds like
my new favorite song #
2051
01:24:59,332 --> 01:25:02,001
# when it's blowing up
my radio #
2052
01:25:02,002 --> 01:25:05,404
# when I try to tune you out
but there's no doubt #
2053
01:25:05,405 --> 01:25:10,175
# you're gonna be stuck
inside my head #
2054
01:25:10,176 --> 01:25:13,445
# all over again #
2055
01:25:32,932 --> 01:25:34,733
# I wake up
we make up #
2056
01:25:34,734 --> 01:25:37,936
# everything feels
like it should again #
2057
01:25:37,937 --> 01:25:42,408
# but everything's all wrong #
2058
01:25:42,409 --> 01:25:46,679
# it just goes on and on
and I just can't hold on #
2059
01:25:46,680 --> 01:25:51,083
# this sounds like
my new favorite song #
2060
01:25:51,084 --> 01:25:53,652
# when it's blowing up
my radio #
2061
01:25:53,653 --> 01:25:57,056
# when I try to tune you out
but there's no doubt #
2062
01:25:57,057 --> 01:26:01,694
# you're gonna be stuck
inside my head #
2063
01:26:01,695 --> 01:26:03,562
# all over again #
2064
01:26:03,563 --> 01:26:07,766
# it just goes on and on
and I just can't hold on #
2065
01:26:07,767 --> 01:26:12,438
# this sounds like
my new favorite song #
2066
01:26:12,439 --> 01:26:16,007
# all over
again #
2067
01:26:20,975 --> 01:26:21,975
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