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DURHAM: My father had few friends.
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A cathedral full of acquaintances,
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but few friends.
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Murray Fox was one of them.
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They'd both kill me for saying so.
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- (light laughter)
- A Jew from the Bronx.
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An Irish Catholic from Westport.
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But they-they thought of
each other like brothers.
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And so, on behalf of the Friars,
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hither and yon, past and present,
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it is my deep pleasure
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to honor Murray with this sketch
13
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to join our cadre.
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And to you, Sam,
15
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we bestow the title Honorary
Friar in Perpetuity.
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Thank you.
17
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Oh, my God. Wow.
18
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Um... (clears throat)
19
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my father loved being a Friar,
and he loved coming here,
20
00:00:49,467 --> 00:00:50,934
and this means a lot.
21
00:00:50,935 --> 00:00:53,570
I get a free martini, right? 'Cause...
22
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- (light laughter)
- Um, it's a nice perk.
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00:00:55,740 --> 00:00:57,907
But anyway... thanks, Durham.
24
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Okay. Thank you.
25
00:00:59,477 --> 00:01:03,113
I remember you were always
so much older than me,
26
00:01:03,114 --> 00:01:05,782
and now we're exactly the same age.
27
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How did that happen?
28
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Mm. I don't know.
29
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I do.
30
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It's this hair.
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My God.
32
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You have no right to
have such good hair.
33
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You can do it again if you want.
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(both laugh)
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So, off topic.
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- No.
- What?
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00:01:28,606 --> 00:01:29,973
I don't want to hear about
38
00:01:29,974 --> 00:01:31,741
how you shtupped Anne Bancroft
39
00:01:31,742 --> 00:01:33,943
when you were at the tender age of 15.
40
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- You don't?
- Or any of those.
41
00:01:35,413 --> 00:01:36,813
That's an unsubstantiated
rumor, you know.
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00:01:36,814 --> 00:01:38,248
(laughing): Yeah.
43
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It's true. And look at
you. You, you know...
44
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it's not like you haven't
had your world tour.
45
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No. No. Child actor.
46
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Married. Now I'm dead.
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(laughs) Hardly.
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So, off topic.
49
00:01:51,529 --> 00:01:53,830
Do you think it's true...
50
00:01:53,831 --> 00:01:56,300
do you think your
father and my mother...
51
00:01:56,301 --> 00:01:58,935
During that five-year period
52
00:01:58,936 --> 00:02:01,471
when Cormic and Murray weren't
speaking to each other...
53
00:02:01,472 --> 00:02:03,273
Do you think they, uh... did it?
54
00:02:03,274 --> 00:02:04,608
- What?
- Yeah.
55
00:02:04,609 --> 00:02:07,444
- That was over a script.
- Mm-hmm.
56
00:02:07,445 --> 00:02:09,979
I don't think... N-No.
57
00:02:09,980 --> 00:02:11,481
I don't know. I don't know.
58
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It's not like Cormic was, uh,
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the most faithful of men.
60
00:02:16,304 --> 00:02:18,355
Well, Murray would never...
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00:02:18,356 --> 00:02:21,825
I mean, he was terrified
of my mother's wrath.
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00:02:21,826 --> 00:02:23,393
(Durham chuckles)
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00:02:23,394 --> 00:02:25,729
Your mom was a babe, though. I remember.
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00:02:25,730 --> 00:02:27,997
Yeah. I remember your mom, too.
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00:02:27,998 --> 00:02:29,666
- She was hot.
- She was...
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- Hi, baby.
- Oh.
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- Hey.
- Hi.
68
00:02:32,570 --> 00:02:34,504
- I thought you had to do the...
- I know. Jeremiah's set isn't
69
00:02:34,505 --> 00:02:35,572
- until 11:00.
- Oh.
70
00:02:35,573 --> 00:02:38,074
- I'm Ruth.
- Oh, yes. Sam.
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Sam. Uh, this is Sam.
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We grew up together.
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SAM: Mm-hmm.
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Yeah. We grew up together.
75
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Except he was older. Much older.
76
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- (Durham chuckles)
- So much older.
77
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You know the feeling?
78
00:02:49,541 --> 00:02:50,487
- You know what I mean, Ruth?
- (cell phone buzzing)
79
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Just a second. Hello?
80
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Wait. Actually, no, honey.
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You can't take... No calls.
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You... Will you take that in the lobby?
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Seriously?
84
00:02:56,727 --> 00:02:58,246
Seriously. It's-it's a rule.
85
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(Durham sighs)
86
00:03:00,498 --> 00:03:01,949
- It's a rule.
- RUTH: Hello?
87
00:03:03,584 --> 00:03:05,935
RUTH (fading into distance):
Hey. You're here? Yeah.
88
00:03:05,936 --> 00:03:07,537
- She's adorable.
- S-Stop it.
89
00:03:07,538 --> 00:03:09,339
- Stop it. Stop it.
- I didn't... I'm not even...
90
00:03:09,340 --> 00:03:10,440
- Don't. Don't. Come on.
- Okay.
91
00:03:10,441 --> 00:03:11,875
It's not like I asked for that.
92
00:03:11,876 --> 00:03:14,077
- (grunts)
- This isn't a demographic
93
00:03:14,078 --> 00:03:16,079
- I go casting my net for.
- Mm-hmm.
94
00:03:16,080 --> 00:03:17,155
- It's not...
- Yeah, I mean, because
95
00:03:17,157 --> 00:03:18,348
it's not like there's
96
00:03:18,349 --> 00:03:22,286
a whole swath of women
in their 40s and 50s
97
00:03:22,287 --> 00:03:24,388
who are totally available,
98
00:03:24,389 --> 00:03:27,190
with great minds and better bodies,
99
00:03:27,191 --> 00:03:29,959
- lovely, sweet, amazing,
- Mm.
100
00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:32,228
Next-level, recently divorced,
101
00:03:32,229 --> 00:03:33,730
- well-adjusted,
- I know.
102
00:03:33,731 --> 00:03:36,433
Ready to go out and share a meal,
103
00:03:36,434 --> 00:03:39,202
have a good time, not boring.
104
00:03:39,203 --> 00:03:41,871
And you just skip over all of them.
105
00:03:41,872 --> 00:03:45,375
I mean, you guys just
skip a whole generation.
106
00:03:45,376 --> 00:03:46,376
Or three.
107
00:03:46,377 --> 00:03:47,644
All right, I know, I know.
108
00:03:47,645 --> 00:03:49,379
And-and, by the way, I agree.
109
00:03:49,380 --> 00:03:51,415
You know? I have lived a bunch of life,
110
00:03:51,416 --> 00:03:53,317
and now I'm just glomming onto hers,
111
00:03:53,318 --> 00:03:55,985
you know, and it's... it's not fair.
112
00:03:55,986 --> 00:03:57,987
I-I don't know why she
agrees to it. (chuckles)
113
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- It's, you know...
- Mm-hmm.
114
00:04:00,974 --> 00:04:01,991
I'm speechless.
115
00:04:01,992 --> 00:04:03,259
(whispers): Yeah, it's...
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it's tough.
117
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- I feel for you. I mean...
- (Durham grunts)
118
00:04:08,816 --> 00:04:10,567
But anyway...
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00:04:10,568 --> 00:04:12,569
- I'll leave you to Ruth.
- Oh, come on.
120
00:04:12,570 --> 00:04:14,804
Sam, Sam, come on, she'll be gone in 20.
121
00:04:14,805 --> 00:04:17,190
She is 20, bro.
122
00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:19,309
Let's have dinner later.
123
00:04:19,310 --> 00:04:21,311
Peace out, Friar Durham.
124
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Oh, the hair!
125
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Come on. Sam.
126
00:04:24,515 --> 00:04:26,015
This was fun.
127
00:04:26,016 --> 00:04:27,817
Deuces!
128
00:04:27,818 --> 00:04:30,587
Text me if you change your mind.
129
00:04:30,588 --> 00:04:33,189
♪ Cigarette smoke is in my eyes ♪
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Sync and corrections by btsix
www.addic7ed.com
131
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♪
132
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(bicycle bell rings)
133
00:04:47,171 --> 00:04:49,189
(birds chirp, squawk)
134
00:04:53,026 --> 00:04:54,895
Hi. Thanks.
135
00:04:56,397 --> 00:04:59,148
What are you doing in my hotel?
136
00:04:59,149 --> 00:05:00,950
This is my hotel.
137
00:05:00,951 --> 00:05:03,152
It's definitely my hotel.
138
00:05:03,153 --> 00:05:04,538
Oh, okay.
139
00:05:06,407 --> 00:05:09,793
Um... I didn't think you
were coming in for this.
140
00:05:09,794 --> 00:05:11,961
Yeah, I'm gonna see yours and
a couple other readings.
141
00:05:11,962 --> 00:05:14,864
Oh. Cool.
142
00:05:14,865 --> 00:05:17,534
You know, I'm really
l-looking forward to it.
143
00:05:17,535 --> 00:05:18,702
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
144
00:05:18,703 --> 00:05:20,970
Yeah. Do you have an early call?
145
00:05:20,971 --> 00:05:23,139
No, no, no, not too early.
146
00:05:23,140 --> 00:05:24,741
Not too early.
147
00:05:24,742 --> 00:05:27,243
That's so funny that you're
staying in my hotel.
148
00:05:27,244 --> 00:05:29,045
Well, you have good taste,
I have good taste.
149
00:05:29,046 --> 00:05:30,213
- Mm-hmm.
- Makes sense.
150
00:05:30,214 --> 00:05:32,332
Yeah, we can go with that.
151
00:05:33,367 --> 00:05:34,884
Are you freaked out?
152
00:05:34,885 --> 00:05:37,821
No. No! No. No.
153
00:05:37,822 --> 00:05:39,889
No, no, no, no, no.
154
00:05:39,890 --> 00:05:41,224
No. Just...
155
00:05:41,225 --> 00:05:42,943
(clears throat) Anyway...
156
00:05:44,712 --> 00:05:48,231
I don't want you to think
that I'm rude, but...
157
00:05:48,232 --> 00:05:50,233
I have to, uh, FaceTime my daughters
158
00:05:50,234 --> 00:05:52,101
and go up to my room, but
159
00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:54,838
it's really good... I'm gonna see you...
160
00:05:54,839 --> 00:05:57,273
tomorrow at the reading.
161
00:05:57,274 --> 00:05:59,042
Thank you.
162
00:05:59,043 --> 00:06:01,911
I'm gonna... I just... 'Cause...
163
00:06:01,912 --> 00:06:03,279
(quietly): I mean, it's great.
164
00:06:03,280 --> 00:06:04,714
You have good taste, I have good taste,
165
00:06:04,715 --> 00:06:06,082
we're staying in a hotel.
166
00:06:06,083 --> 00:06:07,584
(loudly): I'll see you tomorrow, Mer.
167
00:06:07,585 --> 00:06:08,718
Good night.
168
00:06:08,719 --> 00:06:11,254
Anyway, seriously, sorry.
169
00:06:11,255 --> 00:06:13,623
I told my daughters that I would Face...
170
00:06:13,624 --> 00:06:15,925
It's better in the room.
I'll see you tomorrow.
171
00:06:15,926 --> 00:06:18,194
Thank you.
172
00:06:18,195 --> 00:06:19,647
Anyway...
173
00:06:21,281 --> 00:06:23,767
♪
174
00:06:23,768 --> 00:06:27,437
♪ If you'd only start to kiss me once ♪
175
00:06:27,438 --> 00:06:31,541
♪ And say "I love you" some more ♪
176
00:06:31,542 --> 00:06:35,545
♪ But you're either very bashful ♪
177
00:06:35,546 --> 00:06:38,982
♪ Or else just a little bit sore ♪
178
00:06:38,983 --> 00:06:43,219
♪ So if you really want to baby me ♪
179
00:06:43,220 --> 00:06:46,956
♪ Then, baby, why not
do the thing right ♪
180
00:06:46,957 --> 00:06:50,293
♪ Because you really disappointed me ♪
181
00:06:50,294 --> 00:06:52,829
♪ When you forgot to
182
00:06:52,830 --> 00:06:56,016
♪ Kiss me good night
183
00:06:57,084 --> 00:06:58,602
♪ Good night.
184
00:06:58,603 --> 00:07:00,136
WOMAN: Hey, Sam.
185
00:07:00,137 --> 00:07:01,938
- Hi.
- We're on the main stage.
186
00:07:01,939 --> 00:07:04,191
Okay, cool.
187
00:07:05,593 --> 00:07:07,677
- (Sam chuckles)
- MARK: Uh-oh.
188
00:07:07,678 --> 00:07:09,112
- Nice.
- Cute.
189
00:07:09,113 --> 00:07:11,314
Yeah. Nice green shirt.
I see you got the memo.
190
00:07:11,315 --> 00:07:13,249
SAM (laughs): Yes!
191
00:07:13,250 --> 00:07:16,119
- You're my brother!
- We hate each other.
192
00:07:16,120 --> 00:07:17,587
- Yeah, this is gonna be hard.
- I know.
193
00:07:17,588 --> 00:07:18,588
- We're gonna have to act.
- Yeah, you think
194
00:07:18,589 --> 00:07:20,189
- you got it in you?
- I think I do.
195
00:07:20,190 --> 00:07:21,825
- I'm not sure about you.
- Me too.
196
00:07:21,826 --> 00:07:24,327
- ♪
- (indistinct chatter)
197
00:07:24,328 --> 00:07:25,862
Good morning, sunshines.
198
00:07:25,863 --> 00:07:27,330
- Good morning.
- OTHERS: Hi!
199
00:07:27,331 --> 00:07:29,817
(indistinct chatter)
200
00:07:32,520 --> 00:07:34,838
Aunt Sissy and I haven't seen
each other since, uh, what?
201
00:07:34,839 --> 00:07:36,806
I saw you at Joe's Pub last month.
202
00:07:36,807 --> 00:07:38,474
- Oh. Last month.
- Yeah.
203
00:07:38,475 --> 00:07:39,843
Thanks, man.
204
00:07:39,844 --> 00:07:41,611
♪
205
00:07:41,612 --> 00:07:43,997
Hi. Didn't read the script.
Did you guys read it?
206
00:07:44,998 --> 00:07:46,783
(sighs)
207
00:07:46,784 --> 00:07:49,352
Everybody, your character's
name is on your script.
208
00:07:49,353 --> 00:07:51,788
Just a few announcements.
We are on a straight six
209
00:07:51,789 --> 00:07:53,790
with a half-hour lunch, and I think
210
00:07:53,791 --> 00:07:56,192
we have an Equity
deputy here... Jon Jon.
211
00:07:56,193 --> 00:07:57,994
- So concerns go to him.
- (whooping)
212
00:07:57,995 --> 00:08:00,830
- Jon Jon!
- Oh, my God. No, not you.
213
00:08:00,831 --> 00:08:02,231
(chuckles) Can we take
another vote, please?
214
00:08:02,232 --> 00:08:04,167
- MARK: Yeah.
- Your deputy commands you.
215
00:08:04,168 --> 00:08:06,402
- (chuckles) Yes, Mama.
- (light laughter)
216
00:08:06,403 --> 00:08:08,738
And I will turn it over
to your director Trevor.
217
00:08:08,739 --> 00:08:10,406
- Yes!
- Trevor!
218
00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:11,875
(clapping)
219
00:08:11,876 --> 00:08:13,176
What's up, guys?
220
00:08:13,177 --> 00:08:14,578
Thank you for coming in today.
221
00:08:14,579 --> 00:08:16,045
Um, I've been working on this play
222
00:08:16,046 --> 00:08:18,715
for a couple years now with Mook.
223
00:08:18,716 --> 00:08:20,516
(whistling, clapping)
224
00:08:20,517 --> 00:08:22,251
I'm gonna speak for the both of us.
225
00:08:22,252 --> 00:08:25,021
We think this play is
pretty tight, so...
226
00:08:25,022 --> 00:08:27,223
we're not really looking
for a bunch of ad-libbing
227
00:08:27,224 --> 00:08:29,659
or suggestions.
228
00:08:29,660 --> 00:08:32,161
So, just do what's on the page.
229
00:08:32,162 --> 00:08:33,897
Basically, after Williamstown,
230
00:08:33,898 --> 00:08:37,000
the play's been getting a lot of buzz,
231
00:08:37,001 --> 00:08:39,035
uh, both here and the West End.
232
00:08:39,036 --> 00:08:42,371
So, basically, I'll stop you
if I have any adjustments.
233
00:08:42,372 --> 00:08:46,542
But otherwise, we're gonna
try for a few reads
234
00:08:46,543 --> 00:08:48,745
and get it up onstage. Cool.
235
00:08:48,746 --> 00:08:50,413
MARK: I-I never get cold sores.
236
00:08:50,414 --> 00:08:51,848
I just feel, like, a little tingle.
237
00:08:51,849 --> 00:08:53,683
- Oh, Jesus.
- NORM: You never get cold sores,
238
00:08:53,684 --> 00:08:56,352
and you got a whole tub of
lysine in your bag? Okay.
239
00:08:56,353 --> 00:08:58,421
Okay, relax, Norm. All right, relax.
240
00:08:58,422 --> 00:08:59,889
- SAM: Wait. I'm moving over.
- NORM: Scary.
241
00:08:59,890 --> 00:09:00,864
Give Daddy a kiss.
242
00:09:00,866 --> 00:09:02,091
- Put it right there.
- (laughing): No.
243
00:09:02,092 --> 00:09:03,559
HOLLAND: Come over here and sit by me.
244
00:09:03,560 --> 00:09:06,529
- I'm immune.
- (laughter)
245
00:09:06,530 --> 00:09:09,416
- Give me one. Now I'm scared.
- Okay. Yeah, you never know.
246
00:09:11,819 --> 00:09:13,803
Deserted truck stop outside of Ames.
247
00:09:13,804 --> 00:09:17,807
Copulating like swine
under a lone sodium lamp.
248
00:09:17,808 --> 00:09:19,960
This is straight out
of a Hopper painting.
249
00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:25,548
Oh, shit. It's me. Sorry.
250
00:09:25,549 --> 00:09:26,488
NORM: I called you.
251
00:09:26,490 --> 00:09:27,884
- That's points right there.
- JON JON: Were you?
252
00:09:27,885 --> 00:09:30,987
- Maybe.
- Either you were or you weren't.
253
00:09:30,988 --> 00:09:33,923
Uh, look, uh, I'm sorry for stopping,
254
00:09:33,924 --> 00:09:35,925
but did I call?
255
00:09:35,926 --> 00:09:39,312
I mean, you did, and you didn't.
256
00:09:40,914 --> 00:09:42,632
Gotcha.
257
00:09:42,633 --> 00:09:46,435
And have shards of broken
bottles shoved down my throat
258
00:09:46,436 --> 00:09:50,339
while being lowered slowly
into a vat of rabid rats.
259
00:09:50,340 --> 00:09:52,660
Um, okay. I'm gonna
stop you right there.
260
00:09:54,261 --> 00:09:56,445
Sam...
261
00:09:56,446 --> 00:09:58,247
I...
262
00:09:58,248 --> 00:10:02,318
really feel like you're
enjoying this torture scenario.
263
00:10:02,319 --> 00:10:04,353
And, like,
264
00:10:04,354 --> 00:10:06,956
you're playing it at an eight,
and I'm gonna need you
265
00:10:06,957 --> 00:10:09,358
to take it down to, like, a six.
266
00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:11,094
(chuckles)
267
00:10:11,095 --> 00:10:12,495
- (whispers): A six.
- TREVOR: Okay, good.
268
00:10:12,496 --> 00:10:14,463
- So, uh, let's take it again.
- MARK: Okay.
269
00:10:14,464 --> 00:10:17,200
Well, I would rather, uh,
get the hairs of my balls
270
00:10:17,201 --> 00:10:18,768
- plucked one by one.
- (Trevor clears throat)
271
00:10:18,769 --> 00:10:21,004
Okay, guys, it's still
a little hot, guys.
272
00:10:21,005 --> 00:10:24,140
Um, the comedy lies
273
00:10:24,141 --> 00:10:26,109
in this being...
274
00:10:26,110 --> 00:10:27,944
a totally...
275
00:10:27,945 --> 00:10:31,681
you know, like...
276
00:10:31,682 --> 00:10:34,951
you know... kind of tone.
277
00:10:34,952 --> 00:10:36,352
Yeah?
278
00:10:36,353 --> 00:10:38,287
- (soft chuckle)
- Uh, yeah.
279
00:10:38,288 --> 00:10:40,189
- Totally.
- We... Uh, we know.
280
00:10:40,190 --> 00:10:41,691
- Sure.
- TREVOR: Oh, crap.
281
00:10:41,692 --> 00:10:43,659
We got to take a lunch. All right.
282
00:10:43,660 --> 00:10:45,628
- Half hour, people.
- That was, like, a seven.
283
00:10:45,629 --> 00:10:48,064
- TREVOR: Thanks.
- SAM: It lies in the tone.
284
00:10:48,065 --> 00:10:49,532
I mean, it's not good, right?
285
00:10:49,533 --> 00:10:51,134
(chuckling): Yeah.
286
00:10:51,135 --> 00:10:52,802
There's no way they're
bringing this to Broadway.
287
00:10:52,803 --> 00:10:54,237
You never know.
288
00:10:54,238 --> 00:10:55,504
We haven't drunk the Kool-Aid yet.
289
00:10:55,506 --> 00:10:56,672
- Just wait.
- (phone rings)
290
00:10:56,673 --> 00:10:58,141
It's the home front.
291
00:10:58,142 --> 00:11:00,143
- I'll be right back.
- Okay.
292
00:11:00,144 --> 00:11:02,145
(door opens, bell jingles)
293
00:11:02,146 --> 00:11:03,412
(door closes)
294
00:11:03,413 --> 00:11:04,765
Huh?
295
00:11:05,833 --> 00:11:07,334
Really?
296
00:11:10,037 --> 00:11:12,155
Oh. Mark.
297
00:11:12,156 --> 00:11:13,857
Huh?
298
00:11:13,858 --> 00:11:15,442
Nice.
299
00:11:17,878 --> 00:11:19,062
(indistinct chatter)
300
00:11:19,063 --> 00:11:21,681
♪
301
00:11:30,223 --> 00:11:32,192
(applause, cheering)
302
00:11:40,868 --> 00:11:42,685
TREVOR: So, we're gonna go
303
00:11:42,686 --> 00:11:44,353
straight through, no intermission.
304
00:11:44,354 --> 00:11:48,191
Let's do the play.
Skewered by Mook Simmonds.
305
00:11:48,192 --> 00:11:50,593
Watch the axe impacting my skull
306
00:11:50,594 --> 00:11:52,595
and have shards of broken bottles
307
00:11:52,596 --> 00:11:54,597
shoved down my throat
308
00:11:54,598 --> 00:11:58,367
while being lowered slowly
into a vat of rabid rats.
309
00:11:58,368 --> 00:11:59,402
Really?
310
00:11:59,403 --> 00:12:01,704
That sounds like joyous rapture.
311
00:12:01,705 --> 00:12:04,057
He told me he wanted to marry you.
312
00:12:05,893 --> 00:12:06,976
What?
313
00:12:06,977 --> 00:12:08,728
He said he was crazy for you.
314
00:12:09,930 --> 00:12:11,981
What are you talking about?
315
00:12:11,982 --> 00:12:14,450
- Maybe you should tell her.
- Absolutely not!
316
00:12:14,451 --> 00:12:15,718
Don't even think about it!
317
00:12:15,719 --> 00:12:17,404
Jon.
318
00:12:19,472 --> 00:12:21,457
- It's time.
- It's time?
319
00:12:21,458 --> 00:12:23,726
♪ Windows on the world...
320
00:12:23,727 --> 00:12:25,328
That's funny, coming from you.
321
00:12:25,329 --> 00:12:27,931
HOLLAND: I don't care about
the gossip of the thing.
322
00:12:27,932 --> 00:12:29,732
I care about the thing!
323
00:12:29,733 --> 00:12:33,402
We're talking wha-what... 30 years?
324
00:12:33,403 --> 00:12:35,671
- It doesn't matter.
- I'm a hundred million years old now.
325
00:12:35,672 --> 00:12:36,840
Doesn't matter to me.
326
00:12:36,841 --> 00:12:38,507
I am sick of it!
327
00:12:38,508 --> 00:12:41,644
I am sick of being the
Lenny to your George.
328
00:12:41,645 --> 00:12:45,014
Okay, I'm not sitting in the
audience watching the movie
329
00:12:45,015 --> 00:12:47,416
of your life!
330
00:12:47,417 --> 00:12:49,418
Your quarter's up.
331
00:12:49,419 --> 00:12:50,786
♪ That floor you're standing on ♪
332
00:12:50,787 --> 00:12:51,921
Now it's your turn.
333
00:12:51,922 --> 00:12:55,158
♪ Ain't gonna sweep itself
334
00:12:55,159 --> 00:12:56,592
GABRIELLE (crying): His whole life
335
00:12:56,593 --> 00:12:58,761
just clamps down.
336
00:12:58,762 --> 00:13:01,831
Literally clamps down.
337
00:13:01,832 --> 00:13:05,334
♪ Painting every room...
338
00:13:05,335 --> 00:13:07,988
I can't do anything.
339
00:13:10,190 --> 00:13:14,027
(cheering, applause)
340
00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:22,651
MAN: Bravo! Bravo!
341
00:13:22,652 --> 00:13:24,320
(cheering, whistling)
342
00:13:24,321 --> 00:13:26,722
- You killed it. You killed it.
- That was awesome.
343
00:13:26,723 --> 00:13:28,992
- Couple things... (laughs)
- (laughs)
344
00:13:28,993 --> 00:13:29,993
I hope they get the funding.
345
00:13:29,995 --> 00:13:31,227
- It was just wonderful.
- Wow.
346
00:13:31,228 --> 00:13:32,495
- MARK: Thanks, Trevor.
- GABRIELLE: Thank you.
347
00:13:32,496 --> 00:13:33,897
The audience really loved it, man.
348
00:13:33,898 --> 00:13:35,698
- Amazing writing.
- Thank you.
349
00:13:35,699 --> 00:13:38,001
You know, I was in an apartment
with my parents on one side
350
00:13:38,002 --> 00:13:40,136
and my brother and his wife
and their baby on the other.
351
00:13:40,137 --> 00:13:41,537
- What was the title?
- 9JKL.
352
00:13:41,538 --> 00:13:43,206
- SAM: And I get afraid...
- Oh.
353
00:13:43,207 --> 00:13:44,908
- Yeah, not a great title.
- ...because I-I feel like
354
00:13:44,909 --> 00:13:46,342
I'm hoarding it. Yeah, well, you are.
355
00:13:46,343 --> 00:13:48,144
- Hi. Hi.
- Hey.
356
00:13:48,145 --> 00:13:49,678
- Oh, sorry.
- We'll see you at Dear John's.
357
00:13:49,679 --> 00:13:51,080
- Oh, okay.
- All right.
358
00:13:51,081 --> 00:13:53,149
Yeah. I'll-I'll meet up with you guys.
359
00:13:53,150 --> 00:13:56,852
Hi. Good? Was it good...?
I think it's good, right?
360
00:13:56,853 --> 00:13:58,754
I was chatting with the
folks from the festival,
361
00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:00,223
and Mook loves you, of course.
362
00:14:00,224 --> 00:14:02,225
Really? Mm.
363
00:14:02,226 --> 00:14:03,826
How come Tressa didn't know?
364
00:14:03,827 --> 00:14:06,113
Oh. Healthy boundary around that.
365
00:14:07,214 --> 00:14:08,597
I mean... (exhales)
366
00:14:08,598 --> 00:14:10,733
I never would have done this.
367
00:14:10,734 --> 00:14:13,836
I never would have been able to even...
368
00:14:13,837 --> 00:14:17,006
be part of this if you hadn't set it up.
369
00:14:17,007 --> 00:14:19,075
How come she didn't know that?
370
00:14:19,076 --> 00:14:20,743
I'm not good at strategies.
371
00:14:20,744 --> 00:14:23,079
Isn't that what a
manager's supposed to do?
372
00:14:23,080 --> 00:14:24,880
(scoffs)
373
00:14:24,881 --> 00:14:28,684
We've been together 20
years. We're like family.
374
00:14:28,685 --> 00:14:32,255
But you're asking me if I
could do a Broadway run?
375
00:14:32,256 --> 00:14:34,623
Well, yes, I would like to.
376
00:14:34,624 --> 00:14:36,960
I would like to say that I did that,
377
00:14:36,961 --> 00:14:38,694
that I was on Broadway.
378
00:14:38,695 --> 00:14:39,862
Then you should do it.
379
00:14:39,863 --> 00:14:41,397
I can talk to Tressa for you.
380
00:14:41,398 --> 00:14:42,898
There are ways to make this work.
381
00:14:42,899 --> 00:14:44,467
Oof.
382
00:14:44,468 --> 00:14:46,535
All right, well, I'll
see you back in L.A.
383
00:14:46,536 --> 00:14:47,903
Wait. What are you doing?
384
00:14:47,904 --> 00:14:50,073
I got to go up to my
room, make some calls.
385
00:14:50,074 --> 00:14:53,076
But the cast... we're all gonna
go have drinks and sing songs.
386
00:14:53,077 --> 00:14:54,810
(chuckling): I need to work.
387
00:14:54,811 --> 00:14:58,114
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no. Please, please.
388
00:14:58,115 --> 00:15:01,650
Okay, let's just go in here for
one drink. One drink, okay?
389
00:15:01,651 --> 00:15:04,287
- Okay, one drink.
- Okay, good.
390
00:15:04,288 --> 00:15:05,921
- (phone rings)
- Ooh. I'm sorry.
391
00:15:05,922 --> 00:15:07,957
- That's all right.
- Wait. Hang on.
392
00:15:07,958 --> 00:15:09,892
Do you mind if I take this?
393
00:15:09,893 --> 00:15:11,427
Yeah, I'll order for you.
394
00:15:11,428 --> 00:15:13,446
Okay. Thanks.
395
00:15:15,315 --> 00:15:17,166
(sighs)
396
00:15:17,167 --> 00:15:18,501
Hello.
397
00:15:18,502 --> 00:15:20,903
- TRESSA: How'd it go?
- The reading?
398
00:15:20,904 --> 00:15:23,106
No, the opera. Yes, the reading.
399
00:15:23,107 --> 00:15:25,308
Well, there's a lot of buzz.
400
00:15:25,309 --> 00:15:28,095
Mer says they're gonna
take it to Broadway.
401
00:15:29,329 --> 00:15:30,513
Oh, Mer's there.
402
00:15:30,514 --> 00:15:32,181
(sighs) Yeah, she's the one
403
00:15:32,182 --> 00:15:33,700
who thought of me for this.
404
00:15:35,302 --> 00:15:37,920
You know, she figured
that the playwright and I
405
00:15:37,921 --> 00:15:40,189
might connect, so...
406
00:15:40,190 --> 00:15:41,757
Mer told you this?
407
00:15:41,758 --> 00:15:44,044
Yeah, after the thing. What?
408
00:15:45,678 --> 00:15:47,763
- So, you want to do it?
- I don't know.
409
00:15:47,764 --> 00:15:50,033
But this is good. It's good.
410
00:15:50,034 --> 00:15:52,701
I'm gonna make this an
easy conversation for you.
411
00:15:52,702 --> 00:15:54,803
What conversation?
412
00:15:54,804 --> 00:15:58,174
You obviously feel the need to
move on to greener pastures.
413
00:15:58,175 --> 00:16:00,809
And I get it. We've been
together a long time.
414
00:16:00,810 --> 00:16:02,478
And we both respect each other.
415
00:16:02,479 --> 00:16:04,980
But you feel the need
to shake things up.
416
00:16:04,981 --> 00:16:07,616
I don't. I'm not saying
that. Have I said that?
417
00:16:07,617 --> 00:16:10,119
And I value our friendship too
much to stand in your way.
418
00:16:10,120 --> 00:16:11,820
This conversation has
been a long time coming.
419
00:16:11,821 --> 00:16:13,222
Since the movie.
420
00:16:13,223 --> 00:16:15,724
And I want you to feel that you
have the support you need,
421
00:16:15,725 --> 00:16:17,326
- so I will step aside.
- Wait. Wait, wait, wait,
422
00:16:17,327 --> 00:16:18,827
wait, wait, wait. Tressa.
423
00:16:18,828 --> 00:16:20,963
You don't need to say
another word. I get it.
424
00:16:20,964 --> 00:16:22,198
Best of luck to you, Sam.
425
00:16:22,199 --> 00:16:23,250
(groans)
426
00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:26,735
(scoffs)
427
00:16:26,736 --> 00:16:28,704
- What, just now?
- Mm-hmm.
428
00:16:28,705 --> 00:16:30,873
- Just now.
- Why?
429
00:16:30,874 --> 00:16:32,708
I don't know. She's jealous.
430
00:16:32,709 --> 00:16:34,877
She gets her feelings hurt all the time.
431
00:16:34,878 --> 00:16:37,080
I can't ever tell her about
anything that goes on.
432
00:16:37,081 --> 00:16:38,847
She's always like, "Well, I wanted to go
433
00:16:38,848 --> 00:16:40,149
to the thing with you."
434
00:16:40,150 --> 00:16:42,017
Why? I didn't invite you.
435
00:16:42,018 --> 00:16:44,553
- You hurt her feelings.
- Yes.
436
00:16:44,554 --> 00:16:47,590
I can't stand working with women.
437
00:16:47,591 --> 00:16:50,393
I hate it. They get so
fricking emotional.
438
00:16:50,394 --> 00:16:52,595
Uh-huh. Anything that
smells like a feeling,
439
00:16:52,596 --> 00:16:53,896
you can't do that. (inhales)
440
00:16:53,897 --> 00:16:55,164
- Can't do that.
- Look,
441
00:16:55,165 --> 00:16:56,765
I get what feelings are,
442
00:16:56,766 --> 00:16:59,335
but I also know how women
are, and it is so boring.
443
00:16:59,336 --> 00:17:01,904
I know this is bait and I
should walk away from it,
444
00:17:01,905 --> 00:17:04,607
but I kind of can't because it's
absurd, what you're saying.
445
00:17:04,608 --> 00:17:06,109
Yeah, it's also kind of true.
446
00:17:06,110 --> 00:17:07,743
Someone should punch you for saying it.
447
00:17:07,744 --> 00:17:09,578
I mean, I know it looks
like I'm getting worked up.
448
00:17:09,579 --> 00:17:11,080
I know it looks like
you're riling me up,
449
00:17:11,081 --> 00:17:13,048
but you're just so wrong.
450
00:17:13,049 --> 00:17:14,950
So essentially wrong.
451
00:17:14,951 --> 00:17:16,519
Women are so much more complicated
452
00:17:16,520 --> 00:17:17,920
than the way you're portraying them.
453
00:17:17,921 --> 00:17:19,188
You're just ragging on them
454
00:17:19,189 --> 00:17:20,723
'cause of your own suppressed,
fearful bullshit,
455
00:17:20,724 --> 00:17:22,525
so you got to put it all over women.
456
00:17:22,526 --> 00:17:23,926
I wish you would just evolve already.
457
00:17:23,927 --> 00:17:25,928
- You evolve.
- You evolve.
458
00:17:25,929 --> 00:17:27,196
You evolve.
459
00:17:27,197 --> 00:17:28,597
(chuckling): You evolve.
460
00:17:28,598 --> 00:17:30,317
(chuckles)
461
00:17:34,787 --> 00:17:37,106
Would you like me to do
something about this?
462
00:17:37,107 --> 00:17:38,974
About Tressa?
463
00:17:38,975 --> 00:17:41,577
No, not about Tressa.
464
00:17:41,578 --> 00:17:42,962
About this.
465
00:17:44,964 --> 00:17:46,149
Oh.
466
00:17:46,150 --> 00:17:47,916
Um...
467
00:17:47,917 --> 00:17:49,918
Oh.
468
00:17:49,919 --> 00:17:52,139
Yes or no?
469
00:17:53,406 --> 00:17:55,108
(sighs)
470
00:17:56,143 --> 00:17:58,111
Yes or no?
471
00:18:03,116 --> 00:18:07,854
I'm not... not saying no.
472
00:18:09,789 --> 00:18:11,458
You're really something else.
473
00:18:12,492 --> 00:18:14,761
Uh, what?
474
00:18:15,795 --> 00:18:18,281
Come on, Sam. Come on.
475
00:18:18,282 --> 00:18:20,749
Look, you say things to me,
476
00:18:20,750 --> 00:18:22,785
and you look at me a certain way,
477
00:18:22,786 --> 00:18:24,820
and I get dizzy.
478
00:18:24,821 --> 00:18:27,656
You know, it feels like flirting.
479
00:18:27,657 --> 00:18:30,092
- But that's not what it is.
- It is.
480
00:18:30,093 --> 00:18:32,495
It feels like flirting because it is.
481
00:18:32,496 --> 00:18:33,996
No, no, no. I'm...
482
00:18:33,997 --> 00:18:35,998
It's a line from Hannah and Her Sisters.
483
00:18:35,999 --> 00:18:38,267
"I'm a little buzzed
from all this flirting."
484
00:18:38,268 --> 00:18:40,336
I'm fine. Either way, I'm fine.
485
00:18:40,337 --> 00:18:42,438
But just so you know, I
didn't misinterpret.
486
00:18:42,439 --> 00:18:44,473
I didn't pick up on something
that wasn't there.
487
00:18:44,474 --> 00:18:46,709
And I'm not even blaming you.
488
00:18:46,710 --> 00:18:48,477
I know better. I do.
489
00:18:48,478 --> 00:18:50,479
I've seen it a thousand times.
490
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:52,215
Seen what?
491
00:18:52,216 --> 00:18:53,716
Oh, that's right.
492
00:18:53,717 --> 00:18:55,384
"I don't know what's happening."
493
00:18:55,385 --> 00:18:57,052
Your entire sense of self
494
00:18:57,053 --> 00:18:59,222
has been scrambled. I get
it. I've scrambled you.
495
00:18:59,223 --> 00:19:00,856
It doesn't make sense for
you to be attracted to me.
496
00:19:00,857 --> 00:19:02,157
I don't have a dick.
497
00:19:02,158 --> 00:19:04,193
Well, I have a sack full
of dicks. But still...
498
00:19:04,194 --> 00:19:06,362
I understand. Confusing.
499
00:19:06,363 --> 00:19:08,797
Wait, go back. You have a sack of them?
500
00:19:08,798 --> 00:19:10,533
(chuckles): No. No.
501
00:19:10,534 --> 00:19:12,468
And yet, my dear,
502
00:19:12,469 --> 00:19:14,237
even if you don't know what it means,
503
00:19:14,238 --> 00:19:15,671
I've been around this block
504
00:19:15,672 --> 00:19:18,641
many, many more times than you have.
505
00:19:18,642 --> 00:19:21,076
So there's no need to gaslight me.
506
00:19:21,077 --> 00:19:22,862
No need.
507
00:19:24,864 --> 00:19:26,399
We'll just call it a draw.
508
00:19:40,580 --> 00:19:42,349
Good night, then.
509
00:19:43,616 --> 00:19:45,618
See you.
510
00:19:54,361 --> 00:19:56,345
GABRIELLE: This song is great.
511
00:19:56,346 --> 00:19:58,080
Okay!
512
00:19:58,081 --> 00:20:01,016
♪ I have often walked ♪
513
00:20:01,017 --> 00:20:04,186
♪ Down this street before ♪
514
00:20:04,187 --> 00:20:06,855
♪ But the pavement always stayed ♪
515
00:20:06,856 --> 00:20:10,192
♪ Beneath my feet before ♪
516
00:20:10,193 --> 00:20:13,296
♪ All at once am I ♪
517
00:20:13,297 --> 00:20:16,599
♪ Several stories high ♪
518
00:20:16,600 --> 00:20:20,035
♪ Knowing I'm on the street ♪
519
00:20:20,036 --> 00:20:23,372
♪ Where you live ♪
520
00:20:23,373 --> 00:20:26,409
♪ Are there lilac trees ♪
521
00:20:26,410 --> 00:20:29,812
♪ In the heart of town? ♪
522
00:20:29,813 --> 00:20:31,480
♪ Can you hear a lark ♪
523
00:20:31,481 --> 00:20:36,285
♪ In any other part of town? ♪
524
00:20:36,286 --> 00:20:39,555
♪ Does enchantment pour ♪
525
00:20:39,556 --> 00:20:42,791
♪ Out of every door? ♪
526
00:20:42,792 --> 00:20:46,228
♪ No, it's just on the street ♪
527
00:20:46,229 --> 00:20:48,664
♪ Where you live ♪
528
00:20:48,665 --> 00:20:50,098
GABRIELLE: Here we go.
529
00:20:50,099 --> 00:20:52,668
♪ And, oh ♪
530
00:20:52,669 --> 00:20:56,439
♪ The towering feeling ♪
531
00:20:56,440 --> 00:20:58,507
♪ Just to know ♪
532
00:20:58,508 --> 00:21:03,412
♪ Somehow you are near ♪
533
00:21:03,413 --> 00:21:08,617
♪ The overpowering feeling ♪
534
00:21:08,618 --> 00:21:13,522
♪ That any second you
may suddenly appear ♪
535
00:21:13,523 --> 00:21:15,157
(woman laughs)
536
00:21:15,158 --> 00:21:18,761
♪ People stop and stare ♪
537
00:21:18,762 --> 00:21:22,164
♪ They don't bother me ♪
538
00:21:22,165 --> 00:21:24,933
♪ For there's nowhere else on Earth ♪
539
00:21:24,934 --> 00:21:28,871
♪ That I would rather be ♪
540
00:21:28,872 --> 00:21:32,441
♪ Let the time go by ♪
541
00:21:32,442 --> 00:21:37,613
♪ I won't care if I ♪
542
00:21:37,614 --> 00:21:39,281
♪ Can be here ♪
543
00:21:39,282 --> 00:21:40,949
♪ On the street ♪
544
00:21:40,950 --> 00:21:44,653
♪ Where you live ♪
545
00:21:44,654 --> 00:21:47,390
♪ And, oh ♪
546
00:21:47,391 --> 00:21:51,059
♪ The towering feeling ♪
547
00:21:51,060 --> 00:21:55,831
♪ Just to know somehow you are near ♪
548
00:21:55,832 --> 00:21:57,966
- I'm here.
- There you are.
549
00:21:57,967 --> 00:22:03,572
♪ The overpowering feeling ♪
550
00:22:03,573 --> 00:22:05,508
♪ That any second ♪
551
00:22:05,509 --> 00:22:09,745
♪ You may suddenly appear ♪
552
00:22:09,746 --> 00:22:12,515
MAN: Hey, Norm, take us home.
553
00:22:12,516 --> 00:22:16,419
♪ People stop and stare ♪
554
00:22:16,420 --> 00:22:19,655
♪ They don't bother me ♪
555
00:22:19,656 --> 00:22:22,425
♪ For there's nowhere else on Earth ♪
556
00:22:22,426 --> 00:22:25,861
♪ That I would rather be ♪
557
00:22:25,862 --> 00:22:31,099
♪ Let the time roll by ♪
558
00:22:31,100 --> 00:22:36,705
♪ I won't care if I ♪
559
00:22:36,706 --> 00:22:41,777
♪ Can be here on the street ♪
560
00:22:41,778 --> 00:22:46,699
♪ Where you live. ♪
561
00:22:48,968 --> 00:22:50,970
(cheering, whooping)
562
00:22:54,984 --> 00:23:01,979
Sync and corrections by btsix
www.addic7ed.com
563
00:23:01,981 --> 00:23:05,267
♪ Daisy, Daisy ♪
564
00:23:05,268 --> 00:23:09,037
♪ Give me your answer, do ♪
565
00:23:09,038 --> 00:23:12,641
♪ I'm half crazy ♪
566
00:23:12,642 --> 00:23:15,744
♪ All for the love of you ♪
567
00:23:15,745 --> 00:23:19,247
♪ It won't be a stylish marriage ♪
568
00:23:19,248 --> 00:23:22,651
♪ I can't afford a carriage ♪
569
00:23:22,652 --> 00:23:25,888
♪ But you'll look sweet upon the seat ♪
570
00:23:25,889 --> 00:23:28,423
♪ Of a bicycle built for two ♪
571
00:23:28,424 --> 00:23:29,725
- JON JON: One more time!
- NORM: Oh!
572
00:23:29,726 --> 00:23:32,928
♪ Daisy, Daisy ♪
573
00:23:32,929 --> 00:23:36,565
♪ Give me your answer, do ♪
574
00:23:36,566 --> 00:23:39,768
♪ I'm half crazy ♪
575
00:23:39,769 --> 00:23:43,005
♪ All for the love of you ♪
576
00:23:43,006 --> 00:23:45,641
♪ It won't be a stylish marriage ♪
577
00:23:45,642 --> 00:23:46,842
GABRIELLE: Dump him.
578
00:23:46,843 --> 00:23:49,812
♪ I can't afford a carriage ♪
579
00:23:49,813 --> 00:23:53,181
♪ But you'll look sweet upon the seat ♪
580
00:23:53,182 --> 00:23:57,022
- ♪ Of a bicycle built for two. ♪
- GABRIELLE: Meow, meow, meow.
40578
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