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1
00:00:03,535 --> 00:00:07,005
[♪]
2
00:00:15,681 --> 00:00:18,049
♪ love and marriage ♪
3
00:00:18,050 --> 00:00:20,518
♪ love and marriage ♪
4
00:00:20,519 --> 00:00:22,320
♪ go together like ♪
5
00:00:22,321 --> 00:00:24,789
♪ a horse and carriage ♪
6
00:00:24,790 --> 00:00:28,793
♪ this I tell ya, brother ♪
7
00:00:28,794 --> 00:00:30,729
♪ you can't have one ♪
8
00:00:30,730 --> 00:00:33,632
♪ without the other ♪
9
00:00:33,633 --> 00:00:35,934
♪ love and marriage ♪
10
00:00:35,935 --> 00:00:38,536
♪ love and marriage ♪
11
00:00:38,537 --> 00:00:39,938
♪ it's an institute ♪
12
00:00:39,939 --> 00:00:42,340
♪ you can't disparage ♪
13
00:00:42,341 --> 00:00:46,111
♪ ask the local gentry ♪
14
00:00:46,112 --> 00:00:50,649
♪ and they will say
it's elementary ♪
15
00:00:50,650 --> 00:00:55,453
♪ try, try, try
to separate them ♪
16
00:00:55,454 --> 00:00:59,157
♪ it's an illusion ♪
17
00:00:59,158 --> 00:01:04,295
♪ try, try, try
and you will only come ♪
18
00:01:04,296 --> 00:01:07,732
♪ to this conclusion ♪
19
00:01:07,733 --> 00:01:09,834
♪ love and marriage ♪
20
00:01:15,941 --> 00:01:17,809
Okay, kelly,
how much do you need?
21
00:01:17,810 --> 00:01:19,243
Oh, I don't know.
22
00:01:19,244 --> 00:01:21,312
How much does it take
to start a new life?
23
00:01:21,313 --> 00:01:23,748
More than your father
has in his wallet.
24
00:01:23,749 --> 00:01:25,316
Let's see. Here's $5.00.
25
00:01:25,317 --> 00:01:26,584
Bud?
26
00:01:26,585 --> 00:01:29,921
Well, going by the old
"double for virgins" rule,
27
00:01:29,922 --> 00:01:30,822
I get 10.
28
00:01:32,591 --> 00:01:33,624
Mom,
29
00:01:33,625 --> 00:01:35,060
If you let him get away
with that,
30
00:01:35,061 --> 00:01:37,962
When he's 65, he'll be expecting
two gold watches.
31
00:01:39,498 --> 00:01:42,333
Well, let's not bleed daddy dry.
32
00:01:42,334 --> 00:01:44,169
Here's $5.00 for you...
33
00:01:44,170 --> 00:01:46,504
And 20 for me.
34
00:01:47,973 --> 00:01:49,140
Al: Hey, peg!
35
00:01:49,141 --> 00:01:51,142
Have you seen
my wallet?
36
00:01:51,143 --> 00:01:55,146
Gee, uh, I don't know.
What does it look like?
37
00:01:55,147 --> 00:01:56,981
Old, wrinkled,
and empty,
38
00:01:56,982 --> 00:01:58,349
Like my life.
39
00:02:01,087 --> 00:02:02,453
Well, don't worry, honey.
40
00:02:02,454 --> 00:02:05,423
I'm sure it's down here
in your jacket pocket.
41
00:02:05,424 --> 00:02:07,391
Bud, go put this
in daddy's jacket pocket, okay?
42
00:02:17,402 --> 00:02:18,970
Hey, peg.
43
00:02:18,971 --> 00:02:21,206
Are you showing the kids
what you do all day long?
44
00:02:21,207 --> 00:02:23,541
Morning, al.
Morning, daddy.
45
00:02:23,542 --> 00:02:26,344
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
46
00:02:26,345 --> 00:02:28,046
Ah! Here it is.
47
00:02:36,989 --> 00:02:40,759
Jeez, where does it all go?
48
00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:42,560
Gee, why are you asking me?
49
00:02:42,561 --> 00:02:44,028
[nervous chuckle]
50
00:02:44,029 --> 00:02:46,497
You know, al, you just don't
know how to manage your money.
51
00:02:46,498 --> 00:02:48,066
I wish you'd give me
your paycheck.
52
00:02:48,067 --> 00:02:49,333
And let me manage the money.
53
00:02:49,334 --> 00:02:50,635
Yeah, right.
54
00:02:50,636 --> 00:02:52,603
So you can rob me blind,
huh, peg?
55
00:02:52,604 --> 00:02:54,139
Uh-uh.
56
00:02:54,140 --> 00:02:57,308
At least this way I know
exactly what I've got here.
57
00:02:57,309 --> 00:03:00,078
I've got nothing here, peg.
58
00:03:00,079 --> 00:03:01,746
Well, don't worry, al.
59
00:03:01,747 --> 00:03:04,282
I didn't marry you
for your money.
60
00:03:04,283 --> 00:03:07,952
I'm not really sure why I did,
but I know it wasn't money.
61
00:03:07,953 --> 00:03:10,521
Well, it must have been
that old family tradition:
62
00:03:10,522 --> 00:03:15,059
Find a man, kill his dreams,
and move on.
63
00:03:15,060 --> 00:03:16,828
[doorbell rings]
64
00:03:20,299 --> 00:03:21,399
Good morning, al.
65
00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:24,769
Ah, isn't it great to be alive?
66
00:03:24,770 --> 00:03:25,904
Let me just
stand aside
67
00:03:25,905 --> 00:03:27,205
And give you
a better view
68
00:03:27,206 --> 00:03:29,573
Of the little woman.
69
00:03:29,574 --> 00:03:31,810
Hey, peg, listen.
70
00:03:31,811 --> 00:03:33,411
I know you were planning
to fix me
71
00:03:33,412 --> 00:03:34,478
Some nice nothing
for supper,
72
00:03:34,479 --> 00:03:35,814
But you're better freeze it,
73
00:03:35,815 --> 00:03:37,548
Because steve and I are going
to the track tonight.
74
00:03:37,549 --> 00:03:39,818
That really hurts, al.
75
00:03:39,819 --> 00:03:41,219
You know, I purposely
didn't ask you
76
00:03:41,220 --> 00:03:42,553
For any money today,
77
00:03:42,554 --> 00:03:45,389
And now you're going
to go blow it at the track.
78
00:03:45,390 --> 00:03:46,991
That's where
all your money goes, you know.
79
00:03:46,992 --> 00:03:48,226
No, I don't think so, peg.
80
00:03:48,227 --> 00:03:50,428
See, I've never woken up
in the middle of the night
81
00:03:50,429 --> 00:03:52,763
To find a quarter horse
going through my wallet.
82
00:03:54,666 --> 00:03:57,435
Gee, al, if you don't have
enough money for the track--
83
00:03:57,436 --> 00:03:58,769
Aw, heck, we're buddies.
84
00:03:58,770 --> 00:04:01,772
I guess I can find someone else
to go with me.
85
00:04:01,773 --> 00:04:03,441
Ah, thanks, steve,
86
00:04:03,442 --> 00:04:05,243
But I've got enough
for a couple of bets,
87
00:04:05,244 --> 00:04:07,045
And hell, there's always
that fountain at the mall
88
00:04:07,046 --> 00:04:08,379
People throw pennies in.
89
00:04:08,380 --> 00:04:10,081
I can go dredging
on my lunch hour.
90
00:04:10,082 --> 00:04:11,282
Great. Let's go.
91
00:04:11,283 --> 00:04:13,084
I'll drive you to work
and pick you up.
92
00:04:13,085 --> 00:04:14,319
We'll leave from there.
93
00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:16,387
Oh, steve, uh,
if you're going to the track,
94
00:04:16,388 --> 00:04:18,389
Be sure to bet whatever al bets,
95
00:04:18,390 --> 00:04:20,124
Because as you can see,
96
00:04:20,125 --> 00:04:21,625
He's a winner.
97
00:04:26,531 --> 00:04:29,100
Take it easy, al. It happens.
98
00:04:29,101 --> 00:04:30,935
It doesn't happen
to me.
99
00:04:30,936 --> 00:04:32,203
It's never, never
happened to me.
100
00:04:32,204 --> 00:04:33,604
Wha-- what
am I going to do?
101
00:04:33,605 --> 00:04:35,240
How am I going to tell peg?
102
00:04:35,241 --> 00:04:36,640
Look, you just have to be brave.
103
00:04:36,641 --> 00:04:38,910
Just come right out
and tell her,
104
00:04:38,911 --> 00:04:41,612
"peg, I won $1250."
105
00:04:48,187 --> 00:04:49,854
Steve...
106
00:04:49,855 --> 00:04:51,256
It's the first time
in my life
107
00:04:51,257 --> 00:04:52,390
I've won a trifecta.
108
00:04:52,391 --> 00:04:54,859
I've got $1,200 in my pocket.
109
00:04:54,860 --> 00:04:56,961
Do you know what would happen
if I told peg?
110
00:04:56,962 --> 00:05:00,231
Steve, meet peg.
111
00:05:00,232 --> 00:05:02,233
Peg, I've got money.
112
00:05:02,234 --> 00:05:03,768
[turns vacuum on]
113
00:05:07,907 --> 00:05:10,608
Well, I know what I'm going
to do with the 50 bucks I won:
114
00:05:10,609 --> 00:05:11,609
Share it with marcy.
115
00:05:11,610 --> 00:05:15,579
Wow, hondo.
You are much man.
116
00:05:15,580 --> 00:05:18,049
Hey, I'm not ashamed to say
117
00:05:18,050 --> 00:05:21,552
That it gives me great pleasure
to share with my wife.
118
00:05:21,553 --> 00:05:27,091
What I am ashamed to say is
that's a total lie.
119
00:05:27,092 --> 00:05:28,927
But she scares me to death, al.
120
00:05:28,928 --> 00:05:30,962
Well, I want to enjoy my money,
steve,
121
00:05:30,963 --> 00:05:32,363
So I'm going to hide my money
122
00:05:32,364 --> 00:05:34,265
Until I can decide
what I'm going to do with it,
123
00:05:34,266 --> 00:05:35,666
And you're going to do
the same thing.
124
00:05:35,667 --> 00:05:37,668
Oh, why would I do that?
Because you have to.
125
00:05:37,669 --> 00:05:39,304
If marcy finds out
that you won money,
126
00:05:39,305 --> 00:05:42,606
She's going to know I won money,
and then peg here will know.
127
00:05:44,543 --> 00:05:45,944
Al, what you're asking me to do
128
00:05:45,945 --> 00:05:47,511
Goes against everything
I believe in.
129
00:05:47,512 --> 00:05:49,113
You're asking me
to lie to my wife,
130
00:05:49,114 --> 00:05:50,348
To deceive her,
131
00:05:50,349 --> 00:05:51,950
And I'm afraid
I just can't do that...
132
00:05:51,951 --> 00:05:53,284
For less than 50 bucks.
133
00:05:59,891 --> 00:06:02,393
You're a real weenie, steve.
134
00:06:02,394 --> 00:06:05,796
Yes, but a weenie with $50.
135
00:06:14,873 --> 00:06:18,776
Now, I've got to hide this
somewhere peg would never look.
136
00:06:29,254 --> 00:06:31,555
Ah, there's enough
down there already.
137
00:06:46,605 --> 00:06:48,039
Dirty laundry.
138
00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:50,074
She'll never look here.
139
00:07:15,734 --> 00:07:18,169
$2.00 left?
140
00:07:18,170 --> 00:07:19,770
What a loser.
141
00:07:21,740 --> 00:07:23,307
What are you
doing, peg?
142
00:07:23,308 --> 00:07:25,376
Uh, nothing.
143
00:07:25,377 --> 00:07:26,911
I was just a little chilly.
144
00:07:26,912 --> 00:07:28,612
Mind if I wear your shirt?
145
00:07:28,613 --> 00:07:30,348
Yes!
146
00:07:30,349 --> 00:07:31,682
But al, I'm cold.
147
00:07:31,683 --> 00:07:34,018
Well, then,
put on your robe.
148
00:07:34,019 --> 00:07:35,520
Well, I can't sleep
in my robe,
149
00:07:35,521 --> 00:07:38,156
And if I turn on the heat,
then your feet start to fester,
150
00:07:38,157 --> 00:07:40,058
And the dog starts barking,
151
00:07:40,059 --> 00:07:42,593
The kids wake up.
152
00:07:42,594 --> 00:07:44,095
It's just not worth it.
153
00:07:44,096 --> 00:07:45,629
I'm going to wear your shirt.
154
00:07:45,630 --> 00:07:47,831
But I don't like it
when you wear my shirt.
155
00:07:47,832 --> 00:07:49,567
Isn't there any other way
you can keep warm?
156
00:07:54,005 --> 00:07:55,473
Oh, no!
157
00:07:57,609 --> 00:08:00,678
It's either you or the shirt.
158
00:08:07,686 --> 00:08:08,719
Darling!
159
00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:10,521
Oh, ho, ho!
160
00:08:16,195 --> 00:08:18,696
Gee, three days
in a row.
161
00:08:18,697 --> 00:08:21,865
I must be looking
pretty good lately.
162
00:08:21,866 --> 00:08:23,934
Yeah, you're the best, baby.
163
00:08:27,005 --> 00:08:30,007
Oh, al.
You know you love it.
164
00:08:30,008 --> 00:08:31,509
Come on. Admit it.
165
00:08:31,510 --> 00:08:33,010
You and your excuses...
166
00:08:33,011 --> 00:08:35,513
Like that first night,
I was cold,
167
00:08:35,514 --> 00:08:38,082
And you wouldn't
let me use your shirt.
168
00:08:38,083 --> 00:08:39,450
The next night,
169
00:08:39,451 --> 00:08:41,085
You wouldn't let me near
the spare blanket,
170
00:08:41,086 --> 00:08:42,253
And the third night,
171
00:08:42,254 --> 00:08:43,654
I was halfway
to the hot water bottle
172
00:08:43,655 --> 00:08:48,159
When you tackled me
and pinned me to the floor.
173
00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:50,661
What do I have to go for
tonight, tiger,
174
00:08:50,662 --> 00:08:52,530
Your hat?
175
00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:03,741
Oh, by the way, al,
176
00:09:03,742 --> 00:09:06,110
This morning,
I was going through your wallet
177
00:09:06,111 --> 00:09:07,678
Looking for--
178
00:09:07,679 --> 00:09:09,180
By accident,
179
00:09:09,181 --> 00:09:10,381
And I just happened to notice
180
00:09:10,382 --> 00:09:12,416
That you haven't cashed
your paycheck.
181
00:09:12,417 --> 00:09:13,451
Why?
182
00:09:13,452 --> 00:09:18,055
Why, I just haven't had time.
183
00:09:18,056 --> 00:09:20,158
See you around.
184
00:09:20,159 --> 00:09:21,425
Bye, sweetie.
185
00:09:25,964 --> 00:09:28,533
Kids! Family meeting!
186
00:09:35,907 --> 00:09:37,408
What's up, mom?
187
00:09:37,409 --> 00:09:41,445
Kids, I suspect
your father has money.
188
00:09:46,585 --> 00:09:49,053
And his paycheck
was dated three days ago,
189
00:09:49,054 --> 00:09:51,522
And he hasn't cashed it yet.
190
00:09:51,523 --> 00:09:52,590
Mm.
Mm.
191
00:09:52,591 --> 00:09:54,124
So daddy has money.
192
00:09:54,125 --> 00:09:56,194
You know,
it all makes sense now.
193
00:09:56,195 --> 00:09:58,462
Did you notice that last night
he wasn't studying road maps
194
00:09:58,463 --> 00:10:00,565
And fondling his car keys
like usual?
195
00:10:01,933 --> 00:10:05,236
Yeah, and I watched him shave
this morning.
196
00:10:05,237 --> 00:10:08,105
You know, he didn't pause at all
near the jugular.
197
00:10:09,508 --> 00:10:10,841
No kidding?
198
00:10:10,842 --> 00:10:13,043
Well, he's obviously
got more than I thought.
199
00:10:13,044 --> 00:10:15,513
Okay, kids, we are going
to tear this place apart.
200
00:10:15,514 --> 00:10:16,814
Kelly, you take upstairs.
201
00:10:16,815 --> 00:10:18,816
Bud, you go down
into the basement,
202
00:10:18,817 --> 00:10:20,418
And I'll look around down here.
203
00:10:20,419 --> 00:10:22,453
Aw, mom,
I got stuck with the basement
204
00:10:22,454 --> 00:10:24,955
When his tax refund came in.
205
00:10:24,956 --> 00:10:27,057
Now, don't whine.
206
00:10:27,058 --> 00:10:29,760
There is a 10% finder's fee,
and then we split.
207
00:10:29,761 --> 00:10:33,130
20-20-60.
208
00:10:33,131 --> 00:10:34,265
Now, let's go.
209
00:10:38,270 --> 00:10:40,170
[doorbell rings]
210
00:10:42,941 --> 00:10:44,442
What's wrong with al?
211
00:10:44,443 --> 00:10:47,511
I was out on the street
picking up my newspaper
212
00:10:47,512 --> 00:10:48,779
When he pulled out.
213
00:10:48,780 --> 00:10:52,250
He didn't aim his car at me
and gun it.
214
00:10:52,251 --> 00:10:54,785
Oh, boy! He must
have a fortune!
215
00:10:54,786 --> 00:10:58,222
Come on. Help me search.
Al's got money.
216
00:10:58,223 --> 00:11:00,090
So what?
217
00:11:00,091 --> 00:11:03,494
So it's mine,
and he's not giving it to me.
218
00:11:03,495 --> 00:11:06,964
Well, that's kind of cruel,
not sharing with your wife.
219
00:11:06,965 --> 00:11:08,666
Oh, who's talking
about sharing?
220
00:11:08,667 --> 00:11:10,568
I want it all.
221
00:11:10,569 --> 00:11:12,436
Not because I'm greedy,
you understand.
222
00:11:12,437 --> 00:11:13,471
Whoo, two bits.
223
00:11:14,673 --> 00:11:17,308
You see,
it's good for our marriage.
224
00:11:17,309 --> 00:11:20,611
If al has money,
then he doesn't come home.
225
00:11:20,612 --> 00:11:22,012
Will he take a check?
226
00:11:22,013 --> 00:11:23,614
Because I know
the rest of the block
227
00:11:23,615 --> 00:11:25,149
Will kick in.
228
00:11:25,150 --> 00:11:28,919
Yes, I know it sounds good
on the surface,
229
00:11:28,920 --> 00:11:32,256
But the problem is
he doesn't just go away.
230
00:11:32,257 --> 00:11:34,692
He goes away and has fun.
231
00:11:34,693 --> 00:11:37,561
You see, marcy,
my mother taught me two things:
232
00:11:37,562 --> 00:11:38,596
Never feed a man
233
00:11:38,597 --> 00:11:40,831
When you can
feed yourself twice,
234
00:11:40,832 --> 00:11:43,066
And if you're going to rot
on a couch in hell,
235
00:11:43,067 --> 00:11:46,170
The least your husband can do
is to burn right beside you.
236
00:11:48,607 --> 00:11:53,076
Well, love touches us all
in different ways, I suppose.
237
00:11:53,077 --> 00:11:54,345
But early on,
238
00:11:54,346 --> 00:11:56,180
Steve and I decided
to share everything
239
00:11:56,181 --> 00:11:58,115
And keep no secrets
from each other.
240
00:11:58,116 --> 00:12:00,984
Huh. Well, I would keep
a good eye on him, marce,
241
00:12:00,985 --> 00:12:04,288
Because god only knows
what ideas al put in his head
242
00:12:04,289 --> 00:12:05,523
When they went
to the track.
243
00:12:05,524 --> 00:12:07,458
Steve went to the track?
244
00:12:09,328 --> 00:12:11,128
You know,
I thought it was kind of odd
245
00:12:11,129 --> 00:12:13,464
That al went with him
to the library.
246
00:12:16,901 --> 00:12:18,869
Steve has money too.
247
00:12:18,870 --> 00:12:20,904
No, I won't believe it.
248
00:12:20,905 --> 00:12:24,575
He would never keep
something like that from me.
249
00:12:24,576 --> 00:12:25,909
And I'm so sure of it
250
00:12:25,910 --> 00:12:28,446
That I'm going to tear my home
apart piece by piece.
251
00:12:28,447 --> 00:12:32,049
You'll see. I won't find
so much as a dollar.
252
00:12:32,050 --> 00:12:34,051
And if I do,
I'll take his pride and joy
253
00:12:34,052 --> 00:12:36,721
And superglue it
to a ferris wheel.
254
00:12:40,592 --> 00:12:42,727
So did you find anything?
255
00:12:42,728 --> 00:12:45,363
Uh... Aw,
I'm a little tired.
256
00:12:45,364 --> 00:12:47,264
I'm going to go upstairs
and study.
257
00:13:06,451 --> 00:13:08,018
Hi there, shoe man.
258
00:13:13,324 --> 00:13:15,459
I was in last week,
259
00:13:15,460 --> 00:13:18,962
And I can't stop thinking
about you.
260
00:13:20,632 --> 00:13:22,533
Remember me?
261
00:13:22,534 --> 00:13:23,967
Nightly.
262
00:13:25,570 --> 00:13:27,070
I mean, vaguely.
263
00:13:27,071 --> 00:13:29,106
Can I help you?
264
00:13:29,107 --> 00:13:31,341
I don't know how else to say it.
265
00:13:31,342 --> 00:13:33,043
I want you!
266
00:13:33,044 --> 00:13:36,714
Oh, that's so nice.
267
00:13:36,715 --> 00:13:38,783
But I'm married.
268
00:13:38,784 --> 00:13:42,953
Perfect. That means
you're already broken in.
269
00:13:57,903 --> 00:13:59,837
Al.
270
00:13:59,838 --> 00:14:01,171
Al?
271
00:14:09,280 --> 00:14:10,347
What do you want?
272
00:14:10,348 --> 00:14:12,716
Can't you see I'm busy?
273
00:14:17,422 --> 00:14:19,222
Look, al, I--
I have to talk to you.
274
00:14:19,223 --> 00:14:20,324
I'm really feeling guilty
275
00:14:20,325 --> 00:14:22,760
About hiding that money
from marcy,
276
00:14:22,761 --> 00:14:24,762
So could you do me a favor
and spend yours
277
00:14:24,763 --> 00:14:26,029
So I can share mine?
278
00:14:26,030 --> 00:14:28,732
I can't stand the way she looks
at me, with such trust.
279
00:14:28,733 --> 00:14:29,867
You sure?
280
00:14:29,868 --> 00:14:31,469
A lot of guys mistake trust
for that
281
00:14:31,470 --> 00:14:33,604
Just-keep-the-checks-coming-in-
or-you're-out-of-here look.
282
00:14:33,605 --> 00:14:36,106
They're very similar, you know.
283
00:14:36,107 --> 00:14:38,008
Al, what's the big deal?
Just buy something.
284
00:14:38,009 --> 00:14:39,777
It's not as easy
as that, steve.
285
00:14:39,778 --> 00:14:41,779
When you were a kid,
didn't you ever find money
286
00:14:41,780 --> 00:14:43,380
In the street,
and you were so excited,
287
00:14:43,381 --> 00:14:45,182
You couldn't figure out
what to do with it?
288
00:14:45,183 --> 00:14:46,617
No, al.
289
00:14:46,618 --> 00:14:49,152
I gave it to bunny zackmeyer
so I could look up her dress.
290
00:14:52,090 --> 00:14:54,625
I'm talking about
when you were a kid, steve.
291
00:14:54,626 --> 00:14:58,228
Look, could you just give me
a couple of more days?
292
00:14:58,229 --> 00:15:00,197
In the name of friendship.
Huh, buddy?
293
00:15:00,198 --> 00:15:02,633
Okay, in the name
of friendship,
294
00:15:02,634 --> 00:15:05,335
Which, at today's rates,
is another 50 bucks.
295
00:15:05,336 --> 00:15:07,938
You're a weenie, steve.
296
00:15:07,939 --> 00:15:10,941
Yes, but a weenie
with a hundred bucks.
297
00:15:10,942 --> 00:15:12,977
Oh, by the way, al,
you want a ride home?
298
00:15:12,978 --> 00:15:13,978
No, I got my car.
299
00:15:13,979 --> 00:15:15,579
Yeah, I saw it in the lot,
300
00:15:15,580 --> 00:15:17,214
But it might be tough to drive
301
00:15:17,215 --> 00:15:19,082
With all that broken glass
on your seat.
302
00:15:19,083 --> 00:15:20,751
Don't worry.
It wasn't vandalism.
303
00:15:20,752 --> 00:15:21,785
They stole your radio.
304
00:15:23,021 --> 00:15:24,788
Great!
305
00:15:24,789 --> 00:15:26,957
Well, that's actually
what I was thinking,
306
00:15:26,958 --> 00:15:29,226
But it's not something
you say to a friend.
307
00:15:29,227 --> 00:15:30,928
No, steve.
308
00:15:30,929 --> 00:15:34,565
Now I know what to buy,
a new car stereo.
309
00:15:34,566 --> 00:15:35,866
It's perfect.
310
00:15:35,867 --> 00:15:37,434
See, now I can buy something
311
00:15:37,435 --> 00:15:39,537
For one of my favorite
places in the world,
312
00:15:39,538 --> 00:15:40,971
My car.
313
00:15:40,972 --> 00:15:43,607
Because when I'm in my car,
I don't have any wife or kids.
314
00:15:43,608 --> 00:15:45,242
I'm alone. I'm whole.
315
00:15:45,243 --> 00:15:48,178
I'm with the one I love.
316
00:15:48,179 --> 00:15:51,081
And peggy never drives my car,
so she'll never know.
317
00:15:51,082 --> 00:15:52,282
Tee hee.
318
00:15:52,283 --> 00:15:55,419
I get to spend all my money
on me. Oh, man!
319
00:15:55,420 --> 00:15:57,320
I'll have it installed tomorrow.
320
00:15:57,321 --> 00:15:58,722
Come on, let's go buy it now.
321
00:15:58,723 --> 00:16:00,257
But it's a half-hour
till closing.
322
00:16:00,258 --> 00:16:02,693
Ah, the place is a graveyard.
No one comes in here.
323
00:16:02,694 --> 00:16:04,127
Just give me
a couple of minutes.
324
00:16:04,128 --> 00:16:05,729
I'll turn off the lights
in the storeroom.
325
00:16:09,901 --> 00:16:11,435
Ew.
326
00:16:23,848 --> 00:16:26,850
I'm sorry, miss,
but the place is closed.
327
00:16:26,851 --> 00:16:28,118
Gee, that's funny.
328
00:16:28,119 --> 00:16:31,822
Most stores don't close
until I'm in the dressing room.
329
00:16:31,823 --> 00:16:33,256
Oh, well.
330
00:16:38,063 --> 00:16:41,031
Mm-mm-mm.
331
00:16:41,032 --> 00:16:42,566
Ready to go, buddy?
332
00:16:42,567 --> 00:16:43,734
You bet.
333
00:16:43,735 --> 00:16:45,569
I told you
nobody comes in this late.
334
00:17:32,183 --> 00:17:35,152
Peggy: Al, what
are you doing down there?
335
00:17:35,153 --> 00:17:37,955
I'm watching ted koppel.
336
00:17:37,956 --> 00:17:39,556
Go to sleep.
337
00:17:39,557 --> 00:17:41,391
I'm cold.
338
00:17:41,392 --> 00:17:42,793
Wear my shirt.
339
00:17:45,329 --> 00:17:47,031
Go to sleep.
340
00:17:47,032 --> 00:17:49,967
Kelly: Mom, dad,
will you two be quiet?
341
00:17:49,968 --> 00:17:52,102
You woke me up!
342
00:17:58,643 --> 00:18:01,311
♪ I heard it
through the grapevine ♪
343
00:18:01,312 --> 00:18:04,148
♪ not much longer
would you be mine ♪
344
00:18:04,149 --> 00:18:05,382
Click.
345
00:18:05,383 --> 00:18:07,417
♪ to all the girls
I've loved-- ♪
346
00:18:07,418 --> 00:18:09,386
Click.
347
00:18:09,387 --> 00:18:12,122
♪ big wheels
keep on turnin' ♪
348
00:18:12,123 --> 00:18:14,925
♪ proud mary
keep on burnin' ♪
349
00:18:14,926 --> 00:18:16,293
♪ rollin', rollin' ♪
350
00:18:16,294 --> 00:18:17,627
♪ rollin', rollin' ♪
351
00:18:17,628 --> 00:18:19,296
♪ rollin' down the river ♪
352
00:18:19,297 --> 00:18:20,898
♪ rollin' down the river ♪
353
00:18:20,899 --> 00:18:22,232
[thump]
354
00:18:22,233 --> 00:18:24,434
Peggy: Al!
355
00:18:28,639 --> 00:18:32,776
Al, did I just hear ted koppel
singing "proud mary"?
356
00:18:34,445 --> 00:18:36,446
Yeah. It's sweeps month.
357
00:18:38,149 --> 00:18:40,684
So what do you want, peg?
358
00:18:40,685 --> 00:18:41,885
Oh, I thought
I'd come down
359
00:18:41,886 --> 00:18:42,920
So we could cuddle.
360
00:18:42,921 --> 00:18:44,755
We haven't done that
for a long time.
361
00:18:44,756 --> 00:18:47,524
Oh, peg, just once,
couldn't we do something I like?
362
00:18:47,525 --> 00:18:49,126
I don't want
to dig in my ear
363
00:18:49,127 --> 00:18:51,128
And grin like an idiot.
364
00:18:53,865 --> 00:18:54,865
I want to cuddle.
365
00:18:54,866 --> 00:18:55,866
No.
366
00:18:55,867 --> 00:18:57,901
Well, fine.
367
00:18:57,902 --> 00:18:59,469
But I'm staying
down here anyway.
368
00:19:00,839 --> 00:19:01,939
Where are you going?
369
00:19:01,940 --> 00:19:03,741
To the closet. I'm cold.
370
00:19:03,742 --> 00:19:05,508
I just wanted
to throw something over me.
371
00:19:05,509 --> 00:19:07,044
No, don't go in there!
372
00:19:07,045 --> 00:19:08,112
Well, why?
373
00:19:14,853 --> 00:19:17,121
You've got me.
374
00:19:17,122 --> 00:19:18,288
Wait a minute.
375
00:19:18,289 --> 00:19:19,389
Uh...
376
00:19:19,390 --> 00:19:20,423
[nervous chuckle]
377
00:19:20,424 --> 00:19:23,026
Ah, let's go upstairs
and, uh...
378
00:19:23,027 --> 00:19:24,161
Cuddle.
379
00:19:24,162 --> 00:19:27,697
Aw. It's like
before we were married.
380
00:19:27,698 --> 00:19:29,366
Let's get it
over with.
381
00:19:29,367 --> 00:19:32,535
Just like before
we were married.
382
00:19:32,536 --> 00:19:33,804
Oh, by the way, al,
383
00:19:33,805 --> 00:19:35,806
I had to take my car in
to the mechanic.
384
00:19:35,807 --> 00:19:37,808
He's going to need it
for a couple of weeks.
385
00:19:37,809 --> 00:19:39,676
So I'll have to use
your car.
386
00:19:44,682 --> 00:19:46,283
So you want to sell
your car stereo
387
00:19:46,284 --> 00:19:48,919
After just one day.
388
00:19:48,920 --> 00:19:51,121
I don't want to sell it.
I have to.
389
00:19:51,122 --> 00:19:53,523
Peg's going to be
driving my car for two weeks.
390
00:19:53,524 --> 00:19:55,492
That means two weeks
of hiding my stereo.
391
00:19:55,493 --> 00:19:58,095
Do you know what I have to do
to hide my stereo, steve?
392
00:19:58,096 --> 00:20:01,631
Vile, unspeakable acts
no man should have to do.
393
00:20:03,168 --> 00:20:05,135
[peggy hums happily]
394
00:20:07,705 --> 00:20:10,107
Yes, that.
395
00:20:10,108 --> 00:20:12,276
Now, do you have the cash
or don't you?
396
00:20:12,277 --> 00:20:13,977
Here you go.
397
00:20:16,547 --> 00:20:17,848
There's only $1000 here.
398
00:20:17,849 --> 00:20:20,150
Well, I think that's generous.
399
00:20:20,151 --> 00:20:22,519
After all,
the equipment is used.
400
00:20:22,520 --> 00:20:26,656
Peggy: ♪ la-da, ah ah ah ah ♪
401
00:20:26,657 --> 00:20:28,859
And it seems to be
a buyer's market.
402
00:20:31,162 --> 00:20:33,330
You're a real weenie, steve.
403
00:20:33,331 --> 00:20:37,935
Yes, but a weenie with a stereo
and $150 stashed away
404
00:20:37,936 --> 00:20:39,502
That marcy knows nothing about.
405
00:20:41,605 --> 00:20:44,241
So what are you going
to do with the money, al?
406
00:20:44,242 --> 00:20:46,210
What I always knew
I would.
407
00:20:49,380 --> 00:20:51,681
[making flapping sound]
408
00:20:58,323 --> 00:21:02,726
Al, I heard a strange sound.
409
00:21:02,727 --> 00:21:03,760
What was it?
410
00:21:03,761 --> 00:21:05,896
Family, I have
an announcement.
411
00:21:05,897 --> 00:21:06,897
I have money.
412
00:21:06,898 --> 00:21:08,498
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
413
00:21:10,335 --> 00:21:11,335
I'm getting
a new skateboard
414
00:21:11,336 --> 00:21:12,369
And a leather jacket.
415
00:21:12,370 --> 00:21:13,971
Well, I'm going to get
a cd player
416
00:21:13,972 --> 00:21:15,572
And a suede skirt
and some new boots.
417
00:21:15,573 --> 00:21:18,976
Oh, and I'm going
to spend till I drop!
418
00:21:18,977 --> 00:21:21,278
Wait a second,
wait a second.
419
00:21:21,279 --> 00:21:23,280
Think we should
get dad something?
420
00:21:23,281 --> 00:21:25,115
Well, gee,
I'd love to,
421
00:21:25,116 --> 00:21:27,217
But I don't think
we have enough money.
422
00:21:30,922 --> 00:21:34,892
Well, what can I say?
423
00:21:34,893 --> 00:21:37,460
You, my friend, are a loser,
424
00:21:37,461 --> 00:21:39,997
Whereas
I am your consummate winner.
425
00:21:39,998 --> 00:21:42,032
[pounding on door]
426
00:21:42,033 --> 00:21:43,700
Marcy: Steve, get out here
427
00:21:43,701 --> 00:21:47,271
And explain
this $150 I found hidden!
428
00:21:56,347 --> 00:21:58,048
Ah, let me
handle this, buddy.
429
00:22:00,484 --> 00:22:02,752
Marcy, now, let me explain.
430
00:22:02,753 --> 00:22:05,522
Now, steve wasn't hiding
anything from you.
431
00:22:05,523 --> 00:22:08,325
He was doing me a favor.
432
00:22:08,326 --> 00:22:11,461
He was hiding my $150...
433
00:22:20,204 --> 00:22:22,339
Because he would never
hide anything from you.
434
00:22:22,340 --> 00:22:23,974
Right, steve?
435
00:22:28,279 --> 00:22:29,980
Right.
436
00:22:43,727 --> 00:22:45,829
[♪]
30262
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