All language subtitles for Bill.W..2012.720p.WEBRip.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX]

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BILL WILSON WAS, FIRST AND

FOREMOST, AN ALCOHOLIC IN

RECOVERY.

HE WAS A STINKING, ROTTEN DRUNK

WHO, BY SOME DIVINE GRACE, WAS

GRANTED SOBRIETY, WAS EMPOWERED

TO BRING TO THE WORLD THIS

FELLOWSHIP, THIS MESSAGE.

BUT I THINK, LIKE ANY GIFT OF

THIS MAGNITUDE, SIMPLY TO

PROTECT HIM, HE WAS NOT GRANTED

THE FULL KNOWLEDGE OF WHAT THE

PRICE WOULD BE.

HE WAS SPELLBINDING ON HIS

OWN STORY ANYTIME I EVER HEARD

HIM.

AND I THINK EVERYBODY ELSE HAD

THAT SAME SENSE BECAUSE I THINK

WHAT PEOPLE REALIZED THEY WERE

LISTENING TO WAS THE FOUNDING

MYTH, I GUESS WOULD BE... IT WAS

NOT MYTH.

IT'S REALITY, SIMPLY A STORY OF

A FOUNDING, AND THAT'S WHAT THIS

WAS.

AND IT WAS ENDLESSLY WANTED AND

EFFECTIVE.

ONE DAY I WAS SITTING IN A

BROKERAGE SHOP, AND I FELL INTO

A CONVERSATION WITH A MAN WHO

PROVED TO BE AN HEIR TO A GREAT

FORTUNE.

AND I BEGAN MY SALES TALK ON HOW

CHEAP SECURITIES WORK, HOW A

SYNDICATE OUGHT TO BE PUT

TOGETHER TO GATHER THESE THINGS

UP.

AND HE FELL IN WITH THE IDEA.

AND I WAS TO BE THE MANAGER.

MOREOVER, I WAS TO HAVE 1/3

INTEREST.

WELL, BY THE TIME WE GOT THAT

FAR IN THE CONVERSATIONS, THEY

DISCOVERED ABOUT MY DRINKING.

SO, THEY CAME TO ME, AND THEY

SAID, "LOOK, BILL, WE KNOW YOU

GOT A REAL LIQUOR PROBLEM.

WOULD YOU BE WILLING, DURING THE

LIFE OF THIS THING, TO SIGN AN

AGREEMENT THAT YOU WILL NOT

DRINK, THAT IF YOU DO DRINK,

YOUR INTEREST IN IT WILL BE

ENDED?"

YOU KNOW, THE CURIOUS THING IS,

I REALLY BELIEVED THAT I COULD

STAY SOBER WHEN THE INCENTIVE

WAS SO GREAT.

THE WORK BEGAN.

MONEY CAME IN.

WE BEGAN TO BUY SECURITIES.

BUT NOW SEE WHAT HAPPENED.

[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]

ONE DAY SOME OLD BUSINESS

ACQUAINTANCES CALLED ME UP.

THEY SAID, "BILL, WE HEAR YOU'RE

SOBER."

THEY SAID, "WELL, WON'T YOU GO

OVER IN JERSEY AND DO A PIECE OF

WORK FOR US?"

I SAID, "SURE."

THAT EVENING WE PUT UP AT A

SMALL HOTEL, AND ONE OF THE BOYS

BRINGS OUT A JUG.

AND I SAID, "WELL, WHAT YOU GOT

THERE?"

[ LAUGHTER ]

"WHY," THEY SAY, "THAT'S

APPLEJACK, JERSEY LIGHTNING."

"NO. NO, THANKS.

NO, I'M NOT DRINKING.

I CAN'T HANDLE IT."

THEY FALL TO PLAYING CARDS.

EVERY NOW AND THEN, THE JUG

COMES MY WAY.

WITH EASE, I SAY, "NO, THANKS,"

BECAUSE I CAN SEE MY NAME ON

THAT CONTRACT.

SO, QUITE EASILY I SAY NO...

♪ I'M HAPPY ♪

♪ MY CARES HAVE FLOWN AWAY ♪

♪ A NEW DAY WITH NOTHING... ♪

UNTIL ABOUT 10:30,

PERHAPS.

[ LAUGHTER ]

SOMETHING OCCURRED WITHIN ME.

AND IF THAT COULD BE EVER FULLY

EXPLAINED, WE WOULD COMPLETELY

COMPREHEND THE MYSTERY OF THIS

OBSESSION OF DRINKING.

"WHY, BILL WILSON, IN ALL YOUR

DRINKING, IN EUROPE AND THE

STATES, NEVER IN ALL YOUR LIFE

HAVE YOU HAD ANY APPLEJACK, NOT

ONE SINGLE DRINK OF JERSEY

LIGHTNING."

[ LAUGHTER ]

AND THAT IDEA BEGAN TO TAKE HOLD

AND POSSESS ME SO THAT WHEN THAT

JUG WAS PASSED TO ME, A CURTAIN

HAD FALLEN BETWEEN ME AND

REALITY.

SO, I SAID, "THANKS VERY MUCH.

I WILL HAVE ONE LITTLE SHOT THIS
TIME.

IT COULDN'T HURT ME AT ALL."

YOU KNOW, AT THE END OF THE

LAST CENTURY, THEY WERE TALKING

ABOUT THE MOST IMPORTANT PEOPLE

IN THE CENTURY.

FROM MY PERSONAL PERSPECTIVE,

THERE'S NOT A MORE IMPORTANT

PERSON IN THE 20th CENTURY THAN

BILL WILSON.

I'D BE A DEAD MAN WITHOUT HIM.

HE HAD PROBABLY 30,000

WONDERFUL OPPORTUNITIES NOT TO

GO FORWARD WITH A.A.,

DISCOURAGEMENTS THAT AN ORDINARY

MAN WOULD HAVE TAKEN AS

SUFFICIENT.

BUT HE WAS NOT THAT SORT.

HE WAS NOT AN ORDINARY MAN.

HE LOOKED LIKE ONE AND... WELL,

HE WAS TALL, HE WAS RATHER

GOOD-LOOKING, IN A DIGNIFIED

SORT OF WAY, BUT BY AND LARGE HE

DIDN'T SEEM SOMEONE YOU WOULD

SAY, "WELL, HERE'S A BEETHOVEN

OR HERE'S A WHATEVER."

BUT HE WAS AN ABSOLUTELY UNUSUAL
MAN.

THERE'S NO QUESTION ABOUT THAT,

IN MY OPINION.

[ "UNACCOMPANIED CELLO SUITE" BY

[BACH PLAYS ]

HIS FATHER LEFT IMMEDIATELY,

AND HIS MOTHER WOULD SOON

FOLLOW.

SHE LEFT BILL AND HIS SISTER,

DOROTHY, WITH HER PARENTS TO

BECOME A DOCTOR, NEVER TO BE

FULLY A PART OF HIS LIFE AGAIN.

[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]

[ WATER SPLASHES ]

WELL, BACK IN THOSE DAYS,

THERE WAS AS MUCH OR MORE STIGMA

BON DIVORCE IN A SMALL YANKEE

TOWN AS THERE WAS ON BEING THE

TOWN DRUNK... ALMOST.

SO, AT 10 YEARS OF AGE, I HEARD

THE GOSSIP OF THE NEIGHBORS.

I BEGAN TO FEEL DIFFERENT.

I BEGAN TO FEEL THAT I DIDN'T

BELONG.

THEN, TOO, I WAS AWKWARD,

PHYSICALLY AWKWARD, PRETTY

HOMELY, JUST LIKE I AM NOW,

EXCEPT THEN I CARED MUCH, AND

NOW I DON'T CARE A DAMN.

[ LAUGHTER ]

AND THEN THIS FIERCE DESIRE TO

WIN OUT OVER THESE HANDICAPS

TOOK POSSESSION OF ME.

MY GRANDFATHER, SEEING THIS

TRAIT IN ME, WANTED TO ENCOURAGE

IT, SO HE WAS ALWAYS PROPOSING

THE IMPOSSIBLE.

ONE DAY HE SAID, "UNCLE

CLARENCE'S FIDDLE IS UP THERE IN

THE TRUNK, BUT, WILLY, I DON'T

THINK YOU GOT ANY EAR FOR

MUSIC."

RIGHT UP TO THAT TRUNK, OUT WITH

THE FIDDLE, PUT A CHIP ON IT FOR

A BRIDGE, GET SOME WIRE STRINGS

AT THE GROCERY STORE, AND I

FIDDLE, FIDDLE, FIDDLE, UNTIL I

DROVE HIM JUST NUTS, A DESIRE SO

FIERCE THAT IT TURNED INTO WHAT

THE MEDICS CALL A NEUROSIS, AN

OBSESSION... TO BE WHAT?

THE FIRST VIOLIN OF THE HIGH

SCHOOL ORCHESTRA.

AND BILL WOULD OFTEN TELL

THIS STORY.

AND HE ALWAYS DID INSTANTS,

SOMETHING THAT BECAME

VERY CHARACTERISTIC OF HIS LIFE

FROM THAT DAY FORWARD... MAYBE

IT ALREADY HAD BEEN... BUT WHAT

HE CALLED POWER DRIVES.

HE WOULD SET HIS EYE ON

SOMETHING, AND HE WOULD WORK

LIKE A FIEND TO GET IT DONE.

HE GOT TO BE PRESIDENT OF THE

CLASS, CAPTAIN OF THE BASEBALL

TEAM, FIRST VIOLINIST IN THE

ORCHESTRA.

BUT THERE WAS STILL ONE THING

MISSING FROM HIS LIFE.

I'D HAD A TERRIBLE

INFERIORITY ABOUT GALS UNTIL

FINALLY THE MINISTER'S DAUGHTER

TOOK ME UP.

I SAY "TOOK ME UP" BECAUSE

THAT'S THE WAY WOMEN
DO IT, YOU KNOW.

[ LAUGHTER ]

HE HAD BECOME ENAMORED OF...

AND APPARENTLY IT WAS

RECIPROCATED... A GIRL NAMED

BERTHA BAMFORD.

SO, NOW I'M IN LOVE FOR THE

FIRST TIME.

I'M DELIRIOUSLY HAPPY.

I'M A SUCCESS.

I'M THE NUMBER-ONE FELLA ALL

OVER THE PLACE.

AND THIS HAS NEVER BEEN VERY

WELL EXPLAINED, BUT APPARENTLY

THE PARENTS AND BERTHA WENT OFF

TO NEW YORK, AND THE NEXT THING

KNOWN BACK IN MANCHESTER IS

BERTHA HAS DIED IN AN OPERATION

IN NEW YORK CITY.

IT WAS SO SUDDEN AND SHATTERING

THAT IT SIMPLY TOOK YEARS FOR

HIM TO GET OVER IT.

AND WOULD THAT BE TRUE OR A

NORMAL BOY?

HOW ABNORMAL WAS BILL, TO HAVE

THAT HAPPEN TO HIM?

I DON'T KNOW.

MAYBE MY EXPERIENCE CAN HAVE

SOME VALUE TO SOMEBODY ELSE.

THE MOST POWERFUL THING I WILL

EVER HAVE... AND A LOT OF IT IS

WHAT I WANT TO KEEP IN MIND.

THE MOST POWERFUL GIFT THAT I

CAN GIVE ANYBODY IS WHERE I WAS

BROKEN AND HEALED.

WHEN I CAN SHARE WITH SOMEBODY

WHERE MY LIFE WAS BROKEN AND

HEALED WILL BE THE GREATEST GIFT

I CAN GIVE ANY ALCOHOLIC AND A

LOT OF OTHER PEOPLE, TOO.

[ BELL CHIMING ]

[ UP-TEMPO PIANO MUSIC PLAYING ]

BILL'S LOVE FOR LOIS HAD A

HITCH, THOUGH.

HE WAS A COUNTRY BOY AND FELT HE

COULD NEVER RISE UP TO THE LEVEL

OF HER FAMILY'S SOPHISTICATION.

BUT HE WAS DETERMINED TO DO

RIGHT BY HER.

EVEN BEFORE THEY WERE

MARRIED, THEY SEEMED TO HAVE A

WHOLE BUNCH OF, YOU KNOW, IDEALS

THAT THEY WERE PLANNING ON

LIVING UP TO AND THEORIES ABOUT

THE WAY TO LIVE AND BE HEALTHY

AND SMART AND WELL-READ AND

EDUCATED AND THEY HAD ALL OF

THOSE PLANS AND ONE OF THEM WAS

THAT THEY DIDN'T BELIEVE IN

DRINKING.

AND HE WRITES TO HER IN THE

SUMMER OF 1917, AND SHE PUTS A

NOTE ON THE SIDE OF THE LETTER

THAT SAYS "FIRST DRINK."

AND SHE STARS IT.

SO, IT SAYS, "DARLING ONE, I

WENT TO A MOST PECULIAR PARTY

SUNDAY NIGHT.

A LADY AND THREE DAUGHTERS

ENTERTAINED US."

HE HAS THIS EXPERIENCE OF

FINDING OUT THAT THIS STUFF

THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT IS THE

ELIXIR OF THE GODS,
FOR HEAVEN'S SAKES.

I MEAN, IT DOES PERFECTLY

MARVELOUS THINGS FOR YOU.

YOU TALK. THE WOMEN LISTEN.

EVEN THE MEN LISTEN.

BILL STARTED DRINKING, AND

BEING ALCOHOLIC FROM THE START,

HE GOT DRUNK EVERY TIME HE

DRANK.

ALTHOUGH I WORRIED SOME ABOUT

THIS, I WAS NOT DEEPLY CONCERNED

BECAUSE, LIKE MOST YOUNG WIVES,

I THOUGHT I COULD CHANGE HIM...

[ LAUGHTER ]

AND THAT OUR LIFE TOGETHER

WOULD BE SO HAPPY AND COMPLETE

THAT HE WOULD NOT NEED AN

ARTIFICIAL STIMULUS.

BUT ALL WENT FAIRLY WELL, YOU

KNOW?

EVERYBODY WAS VERY JOLLY.

IT'S WARTIME, AND A FEW DRINKS

HERE AND THERE... AS BILL

HIMSELF SAID, WRITING ABOUT IT,

EVERYBODY WAS DRINKING AND

HAVING A GRAND TIME, AND HE WAS,

TOO.

THE FIRST TIME I DRANK, IT

WAS A MAGICAL EXPERIENCE FOR ME.

IT WAS... IT WAS LIKE I HAD BEEN

HOLDING MY BREATH MY WHOLE LIFE

AND I FINALLY EXHALED.

AND I JUST... I FELT LIKE I FIT

IN WITH EVERYONE ELSE, AND I

FINALLY FOUND MY PLACE IN LIFE.

IT FELT GROWN-UP, MATURE, AND I

EVEN WAS ABLE TO INTERACT WITH

GUYS THAT NIGHT ON A LEVEL THAT

I HAD NEVER BEEN ABLE TO DO SO.

AND SO IT WAS A SOLUTION FOR ME

FROM THE VERY FIRST NIGHT.

I REMEMBER THAT THERE WERE THREE

OF US GIRLS AND WE HAD FOUR

DRINKS AND WE EACH GOT ONE AND

THEN THERE WAS ONE LEFT OVER.

AND I GUARDED THAT DRINK FROM

THE VERY FIRST NIGHT.

I HAD TO HAVE MORE FROM THE VERY

FIRST TIME.

[ FIREWORKS EXPLODING ]

[ CROWD CHEERING ]

WHEN BILL CAME BACK FROM THE

WAR, IT APPARENTLY NEVER

OCCURRED TO BILL TO GO BACK TO

VERMONT.

FROM THE BEGINNING... AND HE

DOESN'T EVEN SAY VERY MUCH ABOUT

THIS... BUT WE ARE IN NEW YORK.

HE CONNECTS WITH SOME PEOPLE IN

THE WORLD OF FINANCE AND HAD A

KNACK FOR IT.

[ BELL RINGING ]

BILL WILSON IS SOMETIMES

REFERRED TO AS A WALL STREET

BROKER, AND HE NEVER REALLY WAS

A BROKER.

HE GOT THE IDEA IN THE 1920s,

WHEN PEOPLE WERE INVESTED SORT

OF WILDLY ON RUMORS, OF GOING

AROUND AND INVESTIGATING THESE

FIRMS AND FINDING OUT WHAT WAS

REALLY GOING ON.G OUT WHAT WAS

SO, BILL CONVINCED LOIS TO

QUIT HER JOB, HOP ON HER

MOTORCYCLE, AND RISK EVERYTHING

FOR A CHANCE AT SUCCESS.

HE BOUGHT SHARES OF STOCK SO HE

COULD LOOK AT THE BOOKS OF

COMPANIES THAT INTERESTED HIM

AND THEN WROTE VERY DETAILED

REPORTS TO SEND TO HIS FRIENDS

ON WALL STREET.

AND ONE WAY TO FIND OUT WHAT

WAS GOING ON IN THE PLANT IS

HEADED FOR THE NEAREST BAR AT

QUITTING TIME AND, YOU KNOW,

SORT OF HOISTED A FEW WITH THE

WORKERS WHO WERE OUT, TO FIND

OUT WHAT WAS GOING
ON IN THE FACTORY.

AND HE DID THIS IN A LOT

OF PLACES.

AND I THINK THAT HIS SKILL WAS

BEING ABLE TO TAKE LOTS OF

DISCRETE PIECES OF INFORMATION

AND SEE WHAT THE WHOLE PICTURE

WAS THAT THEY MADE UP.

WHAT WILSON BROUGHT BACK TO THE

PEOPLE WHO HIRED HIM WAS STUFF

THAT REALLY ALLOWED
THEM TO GET RICH.

THESE WERE ORDINARY JOES THAT

WERE MAKING A LOT OF MONEY FAST,

AND BILL WAS ONE OF THEM.

YOU KNOW, HE HAD RENTED AN

APARTMENT IN BROOKLYN, AND IT'S

NOT BEING ENOUGH, SO HE RENTS

THE ONE NEXT DOOR AND KNOCKS

DOWN THE WALL BETWEEN AND HAS A

BIG LIVING ROOM.

AND SO I DON'T THINK THEY EVER

HAD A TERRIBLE TIME PERSONALLY

WITH EACH OTHER, EXCEPT OVER THE

BOOZE.

AND SHE WAS FOREVER FORGIVING OF

HIM.

I MEAN, I DON'T KNOW WHY.

I WOULDN'T.

[ SOFT JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING ]

LOIS SAID THAT SHE DIDN'T

KNOW WHETHER SHE OR BILL WANTED

TO HAVE CHILDREN MORE.

LOIS HAD HAD THREE MISCARRIAGES

IN THEIR EARLY MARRIAGE, AND AT

ONE POINT THEY FINALLY TRIED TO

ADOPT.

AND THEY WAITED FOR THIS BABY TO

COME, AND THE BABY NEVER CAME,

BUT IT WAS LATER ON IN LIFE THAT

HER CHILDHOOD FRIEND FESSED UP

TO HER THAT THE ADOPTION AGENCY

HAD CONTACTED THEM FOR A

REFERENCE AND THAT SHE WAS

UNABLE TO GIVE A GOOD REFERENCE

BECAUSE OF BILL'S DRINKING.

ALCOHOLISM IS A TREACHEROUS

DISEASE.

[ HORN HONKS ]

IT IS VERY DIFFICULT TO ADMIT TO

BEING AN ALCOHOLIC BECAUSE

THERE'S A REAL BARRIER TO

RECOGNIZING THIS.

[ SOFT JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING ]

ADDICTION IS THIS BELIEF THAT

SOMETHING OUTSIDE OF ME CAN FIX

SOMETHING THAT'S WRONG WITHIN

ME.

I CAN FIND A NEW MEDICINE.

I CAN FIND A NEW WOMEN.

I CAN FIND A NEW CAR.

I CAN FIND A NEW BOAT.

I CAN FIND A NEW JOB.

I CAN FIND A NEW...

NO.

THE EMPTINESS IS STILL THERE.

[ DOG BARKING ]

[ SIREN WAILS ]

AROUND THE SAME TIME THAT

BILL IS STARTING TO REALLY

REALIZE THAT HE'S POWERLESS OVER

HIS DRINKING, SHE WRITES A

LETTER TO HIM EXPLAINING HOW

AWFUL SHE'S FEELING, AND SHE

SAYS, "IT SEEMS EACH NIGHT AS IF

I COULDN'T GO THROUGH ANOTHER,

AND YET ANOTHER COMES AND YET

ANOTHER TILL MY HEART IS LIKE A

STONE WITHIN ME.

IT IS SO HEAVY, AND A GREAT

DULLNESS SPREADS OVER ME TILL

ALL THINGS GOOD OR BAD TASTE

ALIKE."

SHE SAID SHE HAD A TERRIBLE TIME

STAYING MAD AT HIM BECAUSE HE

WAS SO PATHETIC AND SO SINCERE

ABOUT WANTING TO QUIT.

BILL HAD REALLY HIT BOTTOM

WHEN HE MET A MAN WHO WOULD HELP

TURN HIS LIFE AROUND.

LIKE BILL, DR. SILKWORTH LOST

EVERYTHING IN THE CRASH OF '29,

BUT HE FOUND A HOME IN A

DRYING-OUT PLACE CALLED

TOWNS HOSPITAL.

HE HAD A KNACK FOR WORKING WITH

DRUNKS, AND THOUGH HE COULDN'T

OFFER A CURE FOR ALCOHOLISM, HE

TREATED IT AS A DISEASE.

NO FORMAL
INTRODUCTIONS TODAY.

I AGREED TO ABIDE BY THE RULES

OF ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS.

BILL, DO YOU WANT TO JUST START

RIGHT OUT BY TELLING US HOW AND

WHEN YOU FOUNDED A.A.?

YES.

IF YOU DON'T MIND, I'LL START A

LITTLE BIT IN THE MIDDLE.

ALL RIGHT.

IN THE SUMMER OF 1934, I LAY

IN A DRYING-OUT HOSPITAL ON

CENTRAL PARK WEST.

MY WIFE WAS DOWNSTAIRS TALKING

TO THE DOCTOR, AND SHE WAS

ASKING THE DOCTOR WHY I COULDN'T

STOP DRINKING.

AND THE GOOD MAN WAS OBLIGED TO

TELL HER THAT I HAD AN OBSESSION

OF THE MIND THAT CONDEMNED ME TO

DRINK AGAINST MY WILL SO THAT IF

THE DRINKING WAS CONTINUED, I

WOULD BE DESTINED TO GO MAD OR

TO DIE.

IN FACT, HE TOLD HER, FRANKLY,

THAT SHE WOULD SOON HAVE TO LOCK

ME UP IF MY LIFE WAS TO BE

SAVED.

WHEN THE PSYCHIATRIC ASYLUMS

BECAME ALMOST THE ONLY RESOURCE

THAT ALCOHOLICS HAD OUTSIDE OF

JAILS IN THE OPENING DECADES OF

THE 20th CENTURY, THERE WAS A

SENSE... THERE WAS A KIND OF

BELIEF THAT THERE WAS NO SUCH

THING AS ALCOHOLISM AS A PRIMARY

DISORDER.

THERE WAS ONLY UNTREATED

UNDERLYING PSYCHIATRIC ILLNESS.

SO, WHAT THAT MEANT WAS

ALCOHOLICS WERE SUBJECTED TO

MANDATORY STERILIZATION LAWS,

ALONG WITH THE MENTALLY ILL.

IT MEANT THEY WERE SUBJECTED TO

THE HEYDAYS OF ELECTRO AND CHEMO

CONVULSIVE THERAPIES.

IT MEANS THEY WERE SUBJECTED TO

PSYCHO SURGERY, PARTICULARLY

PRE-FRONTAL LOBOTOMIES...

ON THE THEORY THAT THERE WAS

AN ALCOHOLIC PERSONALITY AND IF

THEY ALTERED THAT PERSONALITY BY

BRAIN SURGERY, THAT IT WOULD

CURE THEIR ALCOHOLISM.

I WELL REMEMBER LEAVING THE

HOSPITAL.

AND I SUPPOSE IT WAS MAINLY FAIR

AND CONSTANT VIGILANCE THAT KEPT

ME SOBER FOR THE NEXT FEW

MONTHS.

THEN CAME THAT DAY WHEN YOU HAD

TO WORK IN THE DEPARTMENT STORE.

IT WAS NOVEMBER 11, 1934,

ARMISTICE DAY.

AND I PROPOSED TO GO TO

STATEN ISLAND TO PLAY SOME GOLF

ALL BY MYSELF.

SO, BILL GETS OUT TO

STATEN ISLAND, WHERE THIS PUBLIC

GOLF COURSE IS, AND HE'S RIDING

ON A BUS.

AND THE GUY SITTING NEXT TO HIM

HAS GOT A RIFLE, A TARGET RIFLE

OF SOME SORT, AND THEY GET INTO

A CONVERSATION ABOUT THIS

WONDERFUL RIFLE THE GUY'S GOT.

AND THEY'RE HAVING A

CONVERSATION, AND ALL OF A

SUDDEN... ACCIDENT.

SO, WE SAT AT A TABLE.

I ORDERED A GINGER ALE.

"WHAT?" HE SAID.

"DON'T YOU DRINK?"

"NO," I SAID, "I AM AN

ALCOHOLIC.

I AM A GUY WHO HAS AN OBSESSION.

THIS OBSESSION
DRIVES ME TO DRINK.

ACCORDING TO THE DOCTORS, I'VE

GOT A PHYSICAL SENSITIVITY THAT

CAN DAMAGE ME TO GO MAD OR DIE

IF I KEEP IT UP.

THAT'S HOW BAD I AM.

THAT'S WHY I'M DRINKING GINGER

ALE."

"WELL, OKAY," THE FELLA SAID.

"PLEASE GO RIGHT ON."

[ LAUGHTER ]

SO, HERE HE'S TELLING THIS

GUY THIS STORY AND DRINKING HIS

GINGER ALE.

THE NEW BUS ARRIVES.

THEY GET ON THE BUS.

THEY GO TO WHEREVER THEY WERE

GONNA GO, THE END OF THE LINE,

AND NOW IT'S LUNCHTIME.

THE GUY SAYS, "WHY DON'T WE GO

IN AND HAVE SOME LUNCH?"

WE GOT INTO THAT BARROOM.

THAT BUZZ THAT WE ALL KNOW IN

BARS WAS RISING.

MY MIND AGAIN BEGAN TO WANDER

BACK TO THE DAYS WHEN I COULD

DRINK.

THE OBSESSION WAS DESCENDING

UPON ME.

SUDDENLY, THE BARTENDER COMES

ALONG, BEAMING, AND HE HAS ONE

IN EACH HAND, AND HE PLANKED THE

DRINKS DOWN IN FRONT OF US AND

SAID, "BOYS, HAVE ONE ON THE

HOUSE.

IT'S ARMISTICE DAY."

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

MY NEW FRIEND LOOKED AT ME IN

ASTONISHMENT.

AND HE SAID, "MY GOD, MAN.

AFTER WHAT YOU'VE JUST BEEN

TELLING ME AN HOUR AGO, YOU CAN

DO THIS?

ARE YOU CRAZY?"

AND I SAID, "YES, THAT'S JUST

IT.

I AM CRAZY."

I THINK HE WAS AT A POINT

WHERE HE REALLY, REALLY THOUGHT

THAT SELF-KNOWLEDGE WAS GONNA

KEEP HIM SOBER.

UNDERSTANDING THE PROBLEM,

UNDERSTANDING HOW IT WORKED IN

HIM WAS GONNA KEEP HIM SOBER.

I MEAN, IT WASN'T EVEN THAT HIS

NOSE WAS RUBBED IN IT.

IT WAS LIKE HE WAS SMACKED UP

THE SIDE OF THE HEAD WITH A BAT,

YOU KNOW?

IT WAS JUST... IT WAS SO CLEAR

THAT HE BELIEVED, IN THE DEPTHS

OF HIS SOUL, THE LAST THING HE

SHOULD BE DOING... THE LAST

THING HE SHOULD BE DOING IS

PICKING UP A DRINK.

PICKS UP A DRINK.

MY NAME IS PHIL, AND I'M AN

ALCOHOLIC.

I HAD A BRIEF PERIOD IN

NEW YORK CITY WHERE I GOT GOOD

JOBS AND LOST THEM, WHICH IS

SORT OF THE STORY OF MY LIFE.

I WOULD GET VERY GOOD JOBS.

PEOPLE WOULD HAVE A LOT OF

CONFIDENCE IN ME.

I WAS ABLE TO NOT DRINK.

I KNEW THAT I HAD TO WATCH MY

DRINKING... NOT REALLY STOP, BUT

WATCH MY DRINKING.

BUT I WOULD ALWAYS PICK UP A

DRINK AND DESTROY EVERYTHING.

[ GUITAR PLAYING JAZZ MUSIC ]

♪ YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH ♪

AND I WOULD ALWAYS SAY,

"NEVER, NEVER, NEVER AGAIN."

SOMEWHERE ALONG THE WAY, I

PICKED UP THE DRINK, AND THE

WHOLE THING HAPPENED ALL OVER

AGAIN, EXCEPT WORSE.

I HUSTLED 42nd STREET.

I DID JUST ABOUT ANYTHING WITH

ANYBODY, AS LONG AS A DRINK WAS

INVOLVED, AND FINALLY WOUND UP

AT THE BOWERY, AT THE MEN'S

SHELTER AT THIRD STREET.

AND BY THE TIME I GOT THERE, I

HAD PRETTY MUCH DETERMINED THAT

I COULDN'T FUNCTION, THAT THIS

WORLD WAS NOT A PLACE FOR ME.

AND I THINK I HAD JUST ABOUT

BOTTOMED OUT.

I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT WAS WRONG

WITH ME.

I DIDN'T KNOW FROM ALCOHOLISM.

BUT I WAS READY TO LISTEN AND

MAYBE NOT DEBATE SO MUCH INSIDE

MY HEAD BECAUSE I WAS A GREAT

DEBATER, ESPECIALLY IF ANYBODY

SAID ANYTHING ABOUT MY DRINKING.

I COULD ALWAYS JUSTIFY IT, YOU

KNOW?

HE CAME IN.

I LOOKED ACROSS THE KITCHEN

TABLE.

I PUSHED HIM A TUMBLER OF GIN,

AND HE SAID, "NO, THANKS."

I SAID, "WHAT?"

"NO, THANKS," HE SAID.

"I'M NOT DRINKING."

AND HE LOOKED ACROSS THE TABLE

AT ME, AND WITH A HALF-SMILE, HE

SAID, "WELL, I'VE GOT RELIGION."

GEE, MIGHT AS WELL HAVE HIT ME

IN THE FACE WITH A WET MOP.

[ LAUGHTER ]

OH, BOY. WHAT A DISAPPOINTMENT.

"WELL," I SAID AT LAST, RATHER

WEAKLY, "WHAT BRAND IS IT?"

"WELL," HE SAID, "I WOULDN'T

CALL IT 'BRAND.'"

IT'S JUST COMMON-SENSE IDEAS

THAT I'VE PICKED UP FROM A GROUP

OVER HERE.

THEY CALL THEM THE OXFORD GROUP.

SIX MONTHS AGO, I GOT RELEASED

FROM MY DESIRE TO DRINK BY

PRACTICING VERY SIMPLE

PRINCIPLES.

♪ NOW WE SEE NATIONS FREE ♪

♪ ON THE MARCH FOR GOD ♪

WHAT EBBY BROUGHT TO BILL WAS

THE WHOLE OXFORD GROUP MESSAGE,

WHICH WAS, "YOU BECOME PART OF

OUR GROUP AND YOU ACKNOWLEDGE

THE EXISTENCE OF A HIGHER POWER

AND CLEAN HOUSE," MEANING CLEAN

UP YOUR LIFE AND SO ON...

SOMETHING LIKE THAT, WHICH

ULTIMATELY, OF COURSE, IS

EXPRESSED EXQUISITELY IN THE

A.A. PROGRAM IN THE 12 STEPS.

LOIS COMES HOME ONE DAY AND

FINDS THIS LETTER ON HER COFFEE

TABLE FROM BILL, AND IT SAYS,

"DEAR LOIS, I THINK I SAID THAT

IF MATTERS APPROACHED A CRISIS,

THE INEVITABLE RESULT OF THE

FIRST DRINK, I
SHOULD GO TO TOWNS.

I AM GOING THERE.

I SHALL NOT DELAY A MOMENT.

YOURS YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW

DEARLY... BILL."

AND THEN, WITH NO

PARTICULARLY HOPE OR FAITH, I

CRIED OUT AS A CHILD IN THE

DARK, "IF THERE IS A GOD, WILL

HE SHOW HIMSELF?"

AND THEN IT SEEMED THAT THAT

ROOM LIT UP IN A GREAT GLARE.

I WAS TRANSPORTED INTO AN

ECSTASY.

IT SEEMED THAT I STOOD ON THE

TOP OF A MOUNTAIN AND A GREAT

CLEAN WIND WAS BLOWING, NOT OF

AIR, BUT OF SPIRIT.

AND I WAS FREE.

AT LENGTH, OF COURSE, I REALIZED

I'M STILL ON THE BED, BUT I AM

IN A DIFFERENT WORLD.

A GREAT PEACE HAS SETTLED DOWN.

WELL, FOR ME, THAT WAS THE

BEGINNING OF FEELING THAT

EVERYTHING WAS COMPLETELY ALL

RIGHT, THAT INDEED NOW I WAS A

PART OF LIFE AT LAST, THAT I HAD

TOUCHED THE ULTIMATE REALITY OF

A LOVING GOD.

THE KIND OF THING THAT BILL

HAD IS A THING THAT ABSOLUTELY

TAKES THE ENTIRE HUMAN PERSONA

OR THE COMPLEX OF MIND, BODY,

SOUL, PSYCHOLOGY, THE WHOLE

THING, AND SHAKES IT UP AND SETS

IT DOWN AGAIN, AND IT'S ALL NEW.

IT'S DIFFERENT.

IT IS LIFE CHANGE.

AND BILL SAID, "I KNEW I WAS A

FREE MAN."

OH, BOY, IT WOULD BE FUN TO HAVE

SUCH AN EXPERIENCE, WOULDN'T IT,

THAT WHATEVER IS WRONG, IT'S ALL

RIGHT?

GOD IS IN HIS HEAVEN.

ALL IS WELL WITH THE WORLD.

THAT IS THE BOTTOM LINE OF THIS

KIND OF EXPERIENCE.

AND YOU GO FORTH AS BILL WILSON

DID, AND YOU DO WHAT YOU CAN TO

MAKE THINGS BETTER.

AND HE SPENDS MONTHS

WANDERING AROUND, IN AND OUT OF

BARS, GRABBING HOLD OF DRUNKS,

TELLING THEM THEY GOT TO GET

THIS.

WELL, VERY NICE IF THEY CAN, BUT

OF COURSE NONE OF THEM COULD.

HE DIDN'T GET A SINGLE SOUL TO

SOBER UP...

AND THAT'S WHEN SILKWORTH

DRAGGED HIM IN AND SAID, "YOU'RE

GOING AT THIS WRONG.

THIS ISN'T GONNA WORK.

YOU CAN'T GET PEOPLE TO SIT DOWN

AND HAVE YOUR KIND OF SPIRITUAL

EXPERIENCE.

IT ISN'T GONNA HAPPEN."

TELL THEM HOW BAD IT IS.

GO BACK TO THE PRE-CONDITION.

TELL THEM THEY'RE HOPELESS.

AT THIS POINT, BILL WAS

OFFERED THE CHANCE TO GO TO

AKRON, OHIO, TO TAKE CONTROL OF

A RUBBER MACHINE
CORPORATION THERE.

IF HE COULD WIN THE CONFIDENCE

OF ITS SHAREHOLDERS, HE WOULD

BECOME PRESIDENT AND, MORE

IMPORTANTLY, START MAKING MONEY

AGAIN.

WE GET TO AKRON.

THE DEAL BLOWS UP IN MY FACE.

MY FRIENDS DEPART IN DISGUST.

I AM IN THE MAYFLOWER HOTEL WITH

$10 IN MY POCKET... NOT ENOUGH

FOR A FARE HOME.

FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE THAT

EXPERIENCE IN TOWNS HOSPITAL,

I BEGAN TO BE AFRAID.

IT WAS SATURDAY AFTERNOON.

THE BARROOM WAS FILLING UP.

I FOUND MYSELF WALKING UP AND

DOWN IN THE MAYFLOWER LOBBY.

AND THERE STOOD A CHURCH

DIRECTOR.

AND ABSENTLY, I KEPT LOOKING AT

HIM.

THEN SUDDENLY I WAS SEIZED WITH

A REAL PANIC.

I SAID TO MYSELF, "LOOK, MY

FRIEND, YOU'RE IN A FAIR WAY TO

GET DRUNK."

AND THEN IT OCCURRED TO ME THAT

EVEN THOUGH THE EFFORT I HAD

MADE WITH OTHER ALCOHOLICS HAD

APPARENTLY BROUGHT NOTHING TO

THEM, IT HAD BROUGHT A GREAT

DEAL TO ME.

I NEED ANOTHER ALCOHOLIC TO SO

THAT I CAN FORGET MY TROUBLES BY

TALKING TO HIM.

I NEED HIM AS MUCH AS HE NEEDS

ME.

BILL WAS FAMOUS IN TELLING

HIS STORIES, FOR MAKING THEM

SOUND GOOD AND NOT FUSSING TOO

MUCH WITH PRECISE DETAIL.

AND SO THE VERSION OF THE STORY

THAT COMES DOWN TO US IS THAT HE

CALLED REVEREND TUNKS.

[ LAUGHTER ]

HENRIETTA'S BEEN PRAYING FOR

HER GOOD FRIEND DR. BOB, WHO'S A

CHRONIC ALCOHOLIC AND CAN'T STOP

DRINKING.

THEY'RE READY TO FORECLOSE ON

HIS HOME.

HIS LIFE IS A MESS.

HIS PRACTICE WAS ABOUT DEFUNCT.

HE WAS OUT OF FRIENDS AT THE

TIME HE HAD GONE INTO THE

OXFORD GROUP.

HE WAS READING THE BIBLE.

HE WAS PRAYING.

HE WAS DOING EVERYTHING THE

OXFORD GROUP SAID TO DO, AND YET

HE WAS FACING FAILURE EVERY

TIME.

SO, I THINK IT WAS REALLY

DIFFICULT FOR BOB TO HAVE THE

HOPE THAT THE PRAYERS WOULD BE

ANSWERED.

[ LAUGHTER ]

AND ALL WE KNOW IS THAT

APPARENTLY BILL TOLD BOB WHAT HE

KNEW ABOUT ALCOHOLISM AND WHAT

HIS EXPERIENCE HAD BEEN.

YOU STOP AND THINK OF IT.

BACK AT THAT FAMOUS MEETING IN

AKRON, BILL IS SITTING THERE,

TALKING TO AN OLDER MAN... 15

YEARS OLDER... WHO IS A DOCTOR.

BUT WHERE IS DR. BOB?

HE'S LOST IN THE ALCOHOLIC

LABYRINTH, CAN'T GET OUT OF IT,

TRAPPED.

AND SO BILL WILSON, LITTLE OLD

STOCKBROKER FROM NEW YORK, SITS

DOWN AND STARTS TELLING HIM HOW

BAD IT IS.

WELL, BOB STOPPED DRINKING.

SO, FOR A FEW WEEKS, THINGS WERE

LOOKING UP.

THEN BOB WENT OFF TO A YEARLY

MEDICAL CONVENTION IN

ATLANTIC CITY.

HE WAS BLIND FROM THE START, AS

AN OCCASION FOR DRINKING.

AND HE CONTINUED TO DRINK ON THE

TRAIN HOME, HAD SENSE ENOUGH AND

WIT ENOUGH TO GET HOME.

AT THIS POINT, BILL THOUGHT HE

HAD BOMBED, THAT HIS NEW FRIEND,

BOB SMITH, WAS NOT GONNA MAKE

IT.

AND ANNE PLEADED WITH HIM TO

STAY AND GIVE BOB ONE MORE

CHANCE.

AND NOW THE JOB WAS TO GET

BOB READY FOR THIS OPERATION.

THEY HAD THESE
CURES THEY WENT IN FOR.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT STAGE OF THE

GAME... THEY INVOLVED SAUERKRAUT

AND KARO SYRUP AND KIND OF WILD

STUFF, YOU KNOW?

BUT THEY WERE DOING THEIR BEST.

WELL, HE WAS STILL
IN RUGGED SHAPE.

ANNE AND I DROVE HIM TO THE

HOSPITAL.

JUST OUTSIDE, HE HAD A FINAL

BOTTLE OF BEER AND ONE GOOFBALL,

WENT INSIDE, AND PERFORMED THAT

OPERATION.

BILL AND ANNE WAITED BACK

HOME FOR WORD.

HOURS PASSED. NO CALL.

DINNERTIME PASSED. NOT A WORD.

AND BOB'S TRACK RECORD COULD

ONLY MEAN ONE THING.

AND WHAT HE'S DOING... AND

THEY DON'T FIND THIS OUT FOR

SOME HOURS... IS GOING AROUND

AKRON, TALKING TO EVERYBODY HE'S

BEEN SKULKING AWAY FROM, TELLING

THEM HE'S A DRUNK WHO HAS QUIT

DRINKING AND INTENDS TO CHANGE

HIS LIFE.

BILL'S SUCCESS WITH BOB

INVIGORATED BOTH OF THEM.

THEY DECIDED TO WORK TOGETHER TO

HELP AS MANY OTHERS AS THEY

COULD.

THIS PARTNERSHIP WOULD ONLY BE

BROKEN BY BOB'S DEATH 15 YEARS

LATER.

WELL, CERTAINLY, BILL SPENT

THE SUMMER IN 1935 IN AKRON

WITH... HE WAS STAYING WITH

DR. BOB, AND CERTAINLY THEY WERE

WORKING WITH DRUNKS.

THEY WERE DOING THAT.

BUT I DON'T THINK THAT WAS

REALLY THE REASON THAT BILL

SPENT AS MUCH TIME AS HE DID IN

AKRON.

BILL DIDN'T GIVE UP THE DREAM OF

BEING SUCCESSFUL WITH THIS PROXY

FIGHT HE HAD GOING.

AND I THINK ONE OF THE THINGS

THAT WAS DRIVING THAT WAS THAT

BILL FELT HIS FAILURE IN THE

PAST HAD BEEN CAUSED BY THE FACT

THAT HE HAD ALWAYS GIVEN UP AND

GIVEN IN TOO EASILY.

SO, THERE'S SOME GREAT LETTERS

BETWEEN BILL AND LOIS DURING

THAT TIME FRAME, WHERE SHE

CLEARLY WANTS HIM TO COME HOME.

SHE MISSES HIM.

AND HE SAYS, "I REALLY HAVE TO

STAY HERE."

HE HUNG IN THERE AND HE FOUGHT

AND HE FOUGHT AND HE FOUGHT

UNTIL FINALLY IT WAS ABSOLUTELY

CLEAR THAT THERE WAS NO

POSSIBILITY OF HIM BEING

SUCCESSFUL IN THIS.

AND ONCE HE'D DONE THAT, IT WAS

OKAY FOR HIM TO PACK UP AND GO

BACK HOME TO NEW YORK.

[ "UNACCOMPANIED CELLO SUITE" BY

[BACH PLAYING ]

BILL GOES BACK TO NEW YORK

WITH A GREAT DEAL OF ENTHUSIASM,

STARTS CARRYING THIS MESSAGE IN

A NEW WAY, AND VERY QUICKLY

PICKS UP TWO NEW RECRUITS...

HANK P. AND FITZ M.

AND HENRY G. PARKHURST WAS THE

FIRST DRUNK BILL SOBERED UP

TOWNS HOSPITAL AFTER HE RETURNED

FROM AKRON IN SEPTEMBER OF 1935.

SO, HE HAD A SPECIAL BOND WITH

HANK.

THE NEXT FEW YEARS WERE A

GREAT EXPERIMENT.

BILL WAS WILLING TO TRY ANYTHING

TO HELP PEOPLE GET SOBER.

BY THIS POINT, HANK PARKHURST

HAD BECOME BILL'S RIGHT-HAND MAN

IN NEW YORK, AND TOGETHER THEY

FOUGHT THROUGH THE FAILURE'S TO

FIND OUT WHAT WORKED.

I HAD GOT BACK INTO BUSINESS

BRIEFLY, BUT AGAIN WALL STREET

COLLAPSE AND TOOK ME WITH IT,

AS USUAL.

FAILURE, FAILURE, FAILURE WAS

OUR CONSTANT COMPANION.

WHAT BILL WILSON

FUNDAMENTALLY UNDERSTOOD WAS THE

ISSUE WITH ALCOHOLISM, IN TERMS

OF RECOVERY, IS NOT STOPPING

DRINKING.

IT'S NOT STARTING DRINKING.

SO, THIS IS THE FIRST SOCIETY

THAT MADE A SIGNIFICANT

DISTINCTION BETWEEN THE ACT OF

STOPPING DRINKING AND BUILDING A

LIFE THAT ALLOWED YOU NOT TO

RETURN TO DRINKING.

I HAD FOUND OUT ABOUT THIS

MEETING.

OF ALL THINGS, THEY HAD A WOMAN

SPEAKER.

AND I KEPT THINKING, "THESE

PEOPLE DRINK LIKE I DO, AND YET

THEY'RE STAYING SOBER.

HOW DO THEY DO IT?"

AND SHE SAID, "THE WAY WE DO

IT, " SHE SAID, " IS WE TURN OUR

LIFE AND OUR WILL OVER TO THE

CARE OF GOD, AS WE UNDERSTAND

HIM, FOR 24 HOURS AT A TIME."

SHE SAID, "JUST ONE DAY AT A

TIME."

AND I LOOKED AT THE CLOCK.

AND IT WAS ABOUT 10:00.

TOMORROW NIGHT, IT'S THURSDAY

NIGHT.

AT 10:00, McGUIRE'S WILL STILL

BE OPEN.

I DON'T KNOW HOW I MIGHT FEEL,

BUT I'M GONNA TURN MY LIFE AND

MY WILL OVER TO HIM.

UP TO THIS TIME, A.A. WAS

UTTERLY SIMPLE.

WE DIDN'T EVEN HAVE A NAME.

WE JUST CALLED OURSELVES A BUNCH

OF DRUNKS TRYING TO GET SOBER.

BUT IT WASN'T UNTIL ONE LATE

FALL AFTERNOON WE BEGAN TO PUT

DOWN THE NAMES OF THOSE PEOPLE

IN AKRON, IN NEW YORK, AND THE

LITTLE SPRINKLING IN CLEVELAND

WHO HAD BEEN DRY AWHILE.

AND DESPITE THE LARGE NUMBERS OF

FAILURES, IT FINALLY BURST IN ON

US THAT 40 PEOPLE HAD REALLY

SIGNIFICANT DRY TIME BEHIND

THEM.

I SHALL NEVER FORGET THAT GREAT

AND HUMBLING HOUR OF

REALIZATION, THAT NEW LIFE HAD

BEGUN TO SHINE UPON THE CHILDREN

OF THE NIGHT.

BILL RUSHED BACK TO NEW YORK

TO RAISE MONEY SO THEY COULD

SPREAD THE WORD ABOUT THEIR NEW

ANSWER FOR ALCOHOLISM.

BUT HE COULDN'T FIND ANYONE

WILLING TO HELP.

HE COMPLAINS TO HIS

BROTHER-IN-LAW.

HIS BROTHER-IN-LAW IS A VERY

SUCCESSFUL DOCTOR.

AND HIS BROTHER-IN-LAW SAYS,

"YOU KNOW, I KNOW THIS GUY WHO

WORKS FOR THE ROCKEFELLERS."

COULD THERE BE A BETTER

CONNECTION FOR A GUY WHO'S IN

NEW YORK CITY AND HE'S LOOKING

FOR FUNDING FOR A PROJECT THAT'S

GONNA GET PEOPLE SOBER?

THE ROCKEFELLERS HAD BEEN

POURING A LOT OF MONEY INTO THIS

TEMPERANCE MOVEMENT FOR YEARS

AND YEARS AND YEARS.

THEY WANT YOUR SWEET,

INNOCENT GIRLS TO TAKE YOUR

BOOZE SO THEY CAN BE ENTICED

INTO HONKY-TONKS BY SLICK-HAIRED

VULTURES WHO PREY ON THE FLOWER

OF AMERICAN WOMANHOOD!

I SAY ALCOHOL MUST GO!

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

EVEN THOUGH PROHIBITION

EVENTUALLY FAILED, ROCKEFELLER

WAS STILL INTERESTED IN THE

PROBLEM.

AND BILL WAS ABLE TO MEET WITH

SOME OF HIS CLOSEST ADVISORS,

WHO TOOK A REAL INTEREST IN

HELPING BILL FIND A WAY TO

SPREAD THE WORD.

FOR THE BETTER PART OF A YEAR,

BILL AND BOB, ALONG WITH HANK IN

NEW YORK, TRIED TO
SOLVE THIS PROBLEM.

FINALLY, THE ANSWER CAME IN

WRITING A BOOK TO SHOW OTHERS

HOW THEY LEARNED TO STAY SOBER.

BUT WRITING A BOOK WOULDN'T PUT

FOOD ON THE TABLE.

SO, THE STORY GOES THAT HANK

WENT DOWN TO THE STATIONERY

STORE AND GOT A BLANK

STOCK-CERTIFICATE PAD AND

STARTED MAKING OUT STOCK

CERTIFICATES FOR WORKS

PUBLISHING.

WE WRITE ACROSS THE TOP OF

THEM, "WORKS PUBLISHING COMPANY,

PAR VALUE $25."

[ LAUGHTER ]

SO, WE TAKE THE PAD OF THESE

STOCK CERTIFICATES TO THE NEXT

A.A. MEETING, WHERE YOU

SHOULDN'T MIX MONEY WITH

SPIRITUALITY, YOU KNOW?

AND THE DRUNKS ALL GAVE US THIS

STONY LOOK.

[ LAUGHTER ]

AND I SAID, "WHAT THE HELL?"

[ LAUGHTER ]

"YOU MEAN TO SAY YOU'RE ASKING

US TO BUY STOCK IN A BOOK THAT

YOU AIN'T WRITTEN YET?"

[ LAUGHTER ]

THEY DIDN'T HAVE ANYBODY IN

NEW YORK CITY THAT COULD FORK

OVER $25, SO THEY COME UP WITH A

TIME PAYMENT PLAN... $5 A MONTH

FOR FIVE MONTHS TO PAY FOR YOUR

$25... AND THEY STARTED SELLING

SHARES OF STOCK.

[ KEYS CLACKING ]

NOW, THERE'S THESE LEGENDARY

STORIES THAT THERE WERE HUGE,

HUGE, HUGE FIGHTS OVER THE WORDS

AND THE VERBIAGE USED.

WELL, THE FACT OF THE MATTER IS,

IN THE BEGINNING, THAT WAS NOT

THE CASE.

THE EARLIER CHAPTERS TALK ABOUT

ALCOHOLISM AS THEY UNDERSTAND

THE PROBLEM.

AND I DON'T THINK THINK THERE

WAS A LOT OF ARGUMENT OVER HOW

THEY UNDERSTOOD THE PROBLEM.

THE ARGUMENTS COME UP ON "HOW DO

WE UNDERSTAND THE SOLUTION?"

SO THEN CAME THAT NIGHT WHEN

WE WERE UP AROUND CHAPTER FIVE,

WHERE WE REALLY HAD TO SAY WHAT

THE BOOK WAS ALL ABOUT AND HOW

THIS DEAL WORKED.

ON THIS PARTICULAR EVENING, THE

IDEA CAME TO ME, "WELL, WE NEED

A DEFINITE STATEMENT, A CONCRETE

PRINCIPLE THAT THESE DRUNKS

CAN'T WIGGLE OUT FROM."

IT WAS A 6-STEP PROGRAM THEN.

SO, I STARTED TO WRITE, TRYING

TO BUST IT UP INTO LITTLE

PIECES.

AND WHEN I'VE GOT THE PIECES SET

DOWN ON THAT PIECE OF YELLOW

PAPER, I PUT NUMBERS ON AND WAS

RATHER AGREEABLY SURPRISED WHEN

IT CAME OUT AT 12.

I SAID, "WELL, THAT'S A GOOD,

SIGNIFICANT FIGURE IN

CHRISTIANITY AND MYSTIC LORE.

THEN I NOTICED THAT, INSTEAD OF

LEAVING THE GOD IDEA TO THE

LAST, I'D GOT IT UP FRONT, BUT I

DIDN'T PAY MUCH ATTENTION TO

THAT.

AND, WELL, NEXT MEETING COMES

ALONG... BOY,
PANDEMONIUM BROKE LOOSE.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY CHANGING

THE PROGRAM?

THIS THING IS
OVERLOADED WITH GOD.

WE DON'T LIKE THIS.

YOU GOT THESE GUYS
ON THEIR KNEES.

STAND THEM UP."

[ LAUGHTER ]

BILL WAS REALLY INTERESTED IN

WHAT WORKED, YOU KNOW?

I THINK... ONE OF THE THINGS I

LOVE ABOUT ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

IS THE FACT THAT IT'S WITHOUT

DOGMA, IT'S WITHOUT THEOLOGY.

THERE'S NO REQUIREMENT TO

HAVE ANY RELIGION AT ALL.

THE PHRASE "GOD AS WE UNDERSTOOD

HIM" WAS INCLUDED IN THE STEPS

TO MAKE THE PROGRAM AVAILABLE TO

EVERYONE.

BILL WAS LOOKING FOR MORE OF

AN OPEN-ENDED THING, OPENING UP

THE SOLUTION TO MORE AND MORE

POSSIBILITIES, SO THAT IT'S A

BIGGER TENT, A BIGGER UMBRELLA

FOR PEOPLE TO GET UNDER.

ONE OF THE THINGS THAT INTRIGUES

ME, HISTORICALLY, ABOUT THE

STEPS IS HOW WELL THOSE STEPS

HAVE HELD UP IN TIME.

PART OF THAT IS THEY'RE BROAD

ENOUGH TO BE ABLE TO BE

RE-INTERPRETED OVER TIME... AND

I'M TALKING HISTORICALLY NOW...

BUT THEY'RE ALSO BROAD ENOUGH TO

BE RE-INTERPRETED OVER THE LIFE

OF LONG-TERM RECOVERY.

IN OTHER WORDS, THE SAME 12

STEPS THAT PEOPLE CAN UNDERSTAND

HOURS AND DAYS INTO THEIR

RECOVERY ARE RE-INTERPRETED FOR

PEOPLE IN 5 YEARS AND

RE-INTERPRETED FOR PEOPLE WHO

ARE 10 AND 15 AND 20 AND 30 AND

40 AND 50 YEARS INTO RECOVERY...

SO THAT WHAT BEGAN AS A PROGRAM

OF "HOW DO I STOP DRINKING?" ARE

THE SAME STEPS THAT WILL BE USED

BY OTHER PEOPLE FOR PROFOUND

SPIRITUAL GROWTH LONG AFTER THE

POINT OF ANY APPETITE FOR

ALCOHOL HAS LONG AGO

DISAPPEARED.

I WAS IN PRISON.

AND I WENT TO A MEETING ONE DAY,

AND A FELLA CAME IN FROM

OUTSIDE.

AND HE SPENT THE ENTIRE MEETING.

HE'S TALKING ABOUT THAT PROCESS

OF INVENTORY.

THE FOURTH STEP IN OUR PROGRAM

IS THE INVENTORY STEP... FOURTH

AND FIFTH, HAVING TO DO ABOUT

IDENTIFYING WHAT WE CALL CAUSES

AND CONDITIONS, SORT OF

EXAMINING MY LIFE... YOU KNOW,

WHAT IS IT THAT DRIVES ME IN

SUCH A STRANGE KIND OF WAY?

AND SO I LISTENED TO THAT FELLOW

AND WENT BACK, AND I SAID, "ALL

RIGHT, I'M GONNA DO THAT."

AND I SAT DOWN ON THE BUNK

MYSELF.

AND I INTENDED TO WRITE A LITTLE

STORY ABOUT WHAT A VICTIM OF

CIRCUMSTANCES I WAS, AND I

REALLY WASN'T THIS KIND OF GUY,

YOU KNOW?

THAT'S WHAT I HAD IN MIND.

BUT LITERALLY, WHAT HAPPENED...

I WROTE TWO LINES ABOUT THAT.

AND THEN IT WASN'T A CLAP OF

THUNDER OR ANYTHING, BUT ALL AT

ONCE I THINK THAT DELUSION CAME

TO AN END, AND I SAW WITH

CLARITY WHO I WAS.

THAT DAY I SURRENDERED.

AND I ACKNOWLEDGED DEEP, DEEP

DOWN THAT I CAN'T DRINK.

THAT WAR IS OVER.

IT IS OVER.

AND 50 YEARS LATER, I HAVE NEVER

DOUBTED FOR ONE SECOND.

I UNDERSTOOD FROM THE

BEGINNING THAT I WAS LISTENING

TO UNCOMMON WISDOM.

I HAD THAT VERY WORD.

THESE PEOPLE KNOW SOMETHING THAT

I DIDN'T KNOW, I MEAN, EVEN SUCH

IDIOTICALLY SIMPLE THINGS IS

IT'S THE FIRST DRINK THAT DOES

IT.

I DIDN'T KNOW THAT.

ONE OF THE LAST TWO OR THREE

DRUNKS I WENT ON, I MADE A

FORMAL RESOLVE THAT I WOULD HAVE

BUT TWO DRINKS.

WELL, YOU HAVE THE FIRST ONE,

AND THE FELLOW MAKING THE NEXT

DECISION IS A DIFFERENT FELLOW.

HE'S CHEMICALLY CHANGED FROM THE

FIRST... THE GUY WHO BOUGHT THE

FIRST DRINK, YOU SEE?

AND I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND THAT.

I DIDN'T KNOW.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE THE SAME

FELLOW ALL ALONG.

NO, NO, YOU'RE DIFFERENT.

IT WAS A ROUGH HAUL TO GET

THESE, BUT THE BOOK WAS FINALLY

FINISHED.

NEARLY 5,000 COPIES SAT IN A

WAREHOUSE, HELD HOSTAGE FOR LACK

OF PAYMENT.

THEN A HUGE RADIO STAR AGREED TO

HAVE AN A.A. FRIEND OF HIS ON

HIS SHOW AND PROMOTE THE BOOK.

BILL AND HANK SAW A GOLDEN

OPPORTUNITY IN THIS AND SENT

POSTCARDS TO 20,000 DOCTORS.

IN AKRON, NEW YORK,

CLEVELAND, THE AREAS WITHIN THE

RADIO, WE VISION THE BOOKS GOING

OUT IN CARLOADS.

LITTLE RUTHIE HOCK,

HANK PARKHURST, AND I JUST

COULDN'T WAIT TO GET OVER TO SEE

WHAT WAS COMING INTO THAT BOX.

WE STUCK IT OUT FOR FOUR DAYS.

AND FINALLY WE WENT AND LOOKED

IN THE BOX, AND YOU COULD SEE A

FEW OF THESE CARDS.

AND I HAD A TERRIBLE SINKING

SENSATION.

BUT HANK WAS AN INCORRIGIBLE

OPTIMIST.

HE SAID, "WELL, THEY COULDN'T

PUT THEM ALL IN THE BOX."

HE SAID, "THEY GOT SEVERAL

MAILBAGS FULL OUT THERE."

[ LAUGHTER ]

SO, THE CLERK CAME WITH THE

CARDS.

HANK SAID, "AIN'T THERE ANY

MORE?"

"NO."

WE TOOK THEM OVER TO THE DESK

AND WE COUNTED THEM AND THERE

WERE 12.

AND 10 OF THEM WERE FROM

DOCTORS... OBVIOUSLY STEWED,

THEMSELVES...

[ LAUGHTER ]

WHO LAMBASTED THE HELL OUT OF

US.

AND WE HAD EXACTLY TWO

ORDERS FOR THE BOOK

"ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS."

AND AT THAT VERY OPPORTUNE

MOMENT, THE HOUSE IN WHICH LOIS

AND I LIVED WAS FORECLOSED, AND

WE AND OUR FURNITURE WERE SET

OUT IN THE STREET.

AND THAT WAS THE STATE OF THE

BOOK "ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS" IN

THE SUMMER OF 1939 AND THE STATE

OF GRACE THAT THE WILSONS WERE

IN.

AS LOIS PUT IT, SHE AND THE

DRUNKS AND BILL ALL HAD TO GO.

THEY LOST THE ONLY HOME SHE HAD

EVER KNOWN, THE HOME SHE HAD

BEEN BORN IN.

THEY LIVED, AS BILL PUT IT,

ENTIRELY AT THE GOODWILL OF A.A.

MEMBERS FOR TWO YEARS.

WHAT WOULD WE DO?

AN A.A. LENT US A SUMMER CAMP.

ANOTHER A.A. LENT US A CAR.

THE FOLKS AROUND NEW YORK BEGAN

TO PASS THE HAT FOR GROCERIES

FOR THE WILSONS.

IT WAS REALLY A VERY

CONFUSING AND DIFFICULT TIME.

I REMEMBER GOING THROUGH

GRAND CENTRAL, WONDERING WHERE

WE'D LIGHT NEXT.

WE WERE VERY TIRED THAT DAY, AND

WE WALKED OFF THE MAIN FLOOR AND

SAT ON ONE OF THOSE GORGEOUS

MARBLE STAIRWAYS LEADING UP TO

THE BALCONY.

AND WE BOTH BEGAN TO CRY AND

SAY, "WELL, WILL WE EVER HAVE A

HOME?"

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

[ PIANO PLAYING "AMAZING GRACE ]

BILL HAD A COUPLE
OF JOB OFFERS.

ONE WAS FROM TOWNS, AND THEN HE

HAD ANOTHER ONE, AS WELL.

AND HE WAS, YOU KNOW,

ECSTATIC... "GOD, I'M FINALLY

GETTING BACK TO WORK, AND, YOU

KNOW, I CAN SUPPORT MY WIFE AND

BUY FOOD AND PUT, YOU KNOW, FOOD

ON THE TABLE."

AND HE WENT INTO THE GROUP AND

EXPLAINED THIS, AND THEY ALL

JUST WERE FROWNING BACK AT HIM.

AND THEY WERE LIKE, "BILL, DON'T

DO THIS.

YOU CAN'T DO THIS."

AND SO, YOU KNOW, HE WAS PUT IN

THE PLACE OF HAVING NO MONEY, NO

JOB, AND THEN BEING ASKED TO

CONTINUE TO HAVE NO MONEY AND NO

JOB AND A WIFE TO FEED AND

HIMSELF TO FEED.

BUT BILL THOUGHT IT WOULD

ONLY BE FOR A FEW MORE YEARS,

EXPECTING THAT HE COULD THEN

MOVE ON BECAUSE THE FELLOWSHIP

WOULD BE STRONG ENOUGH TO

SURVIVE ON ITS OWN.

WELL, I THINK ONE OF THE

BIGGEST SHOCKS TO EARLY

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS... AND, I

THINK, TO BILL WILSON... WAS THE

FACT THAT FIVE MONTHS AFTER THE

BOOK COMES OUT, HANK PARKHURST

IS DRINKING.

[ KEYS CLACKING ]

THAT MUST HAVE BEEN A CRUSHING

AND PAINFUL THING FOR

BILL WILSON.

I MEAN, THEY'D BEEN BUSINESS

PARTNERS TOGETHER.

THEY'RE IN THE SAME
OFFICE TOGETHER.

THEY PUT THIS BOOK PROJECT

TOGETHER.

THEY TALKED TO THE ROCKEFELLER

PEOPLE TOGETHER.

I MEAN, HANK WAS A REALLY

CRITICAL, CRITICAL FACTOR IN THE

SUCCESS OF ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS.

AND BILL WILSON CAN'T DO

ANYTHING TO GET HIM SOBER.

I WAS FULL OF FEAR, AND I

DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO LIVE LIFE ON

LIFE'S TERMS.

I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO FACE THE

WORLD.

I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO WORK.

AND SO I DID WHAT ANYBODY'S

GONNA DO WHEN THEY'RE THAT

COMPLETELY MISERABLE, IS I

STARTED DRINKING AGAIN.

AND I WAS OFF AND RUNNING

IMMEDIATELY, BUT
IT WASN'T THE SAME.

IT WAS MORE PHYSICAL, LIKE I

JUST ABSOLUTELY... YOU KNOW, IT

WAS... I MEAN, SURE, I DON'T

THINK LIKE TO THINK TO MUCH OR I

DON'T LIKE TO BE PRESENT, BUT IT

WAS REALLY, REALLY LIKE I

COULDN'T PHYSICALLY STOP

DRINKING.

AND I WENT TO THE DETOX ROUND

AND I WOULD BE OUT AND I WOULD

CALL A.A. PEOPLE AND THEY WOULD

COME PICK ME UP AND TAKE ME TO A

MEETING AND I WOULD GET TO THE

MEETING AND I WOULD WALK OUT THE

BACK DOOR.

I WOULDN'T EVEN STAY
FOR THE MEETING.

I WAS JUST TRYING TO GET A RIDE

ACROSS TOWN.

AND I'D TRY TO GET MONEY OFF OF

THEM, OR THEY'D COME PICK ME UP

AND TAKE ME AND MAKE ME TAKE A

SHOWER 'CAUSE APPARENTLY I STUNK

TOO BAD TO GO TO THE MEETINGS.

SO THEY'D MAKE ME TAKE A SHOWER

AND THEN TAKE ME, YOU KNOW, TO

THE MEETING.

AND EVERY DAY THEY'D PICK ME UP.

[ Voice breaking ] THEY WOULD

ACT... THEY WOULD ACT LIKE

THAT'S THE FIRST TIME I WAS

GONNA GET SOBER.

YOU KNOW, LIKE THEY NEVER GOT

SICK OF ME, THEY NEVER, UM...

THEY NEVER GOT SICK
OF ME, YOU KNOW?

THEY NEVER ACTED LIKE I WAS

WEARING THEM OUT
OR I WAS WHATEVER.

IT WAS ALWAYS NEW.

[ "UNACCOMPANIED CELLO SUITE"

[BY BACH PLAYS ]

MEANWHILE, LOIS AND I HAD

MOVED TO THE CLUB AT OLD 24th

STREET, TAKING A ROOM UPSTAIRS,

NEXT TO TOM MULHALL, THE

CARETAKER.

AND IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER, WE

SLID THROUGH THE YEAR 1940 ON

THIS BASIS.

IT'S VERY INTERESTING, THE

CHANGE, I THINK, THAT TOOK PLACE

IN BILL WILSON'S UNDERSTANDING

OF WHAT ALCOHOLISM WAS.

AND WHERE THIS CHANGE BEGAN WAS

THAT STORY AGAIN GOING BACK

THAT'S RETOLD SO OFTEN... BILL'S

AT THE 24th STREET CLUBHOUSE.

HE'S TOLD THERE'S ANOTHER DRUNK

WHO WANTS TO SEE HIM.

FATHER DOWLING... BY THE WAY, A

NON-ALCOHOLIC... WAS A CHRONIC

ARTHRITIC WHO REALLY SPENT THE

WHOLE OF HIS LIFE IN GREAT PAIN.

AND SO TO FIND A SITUATION WHERE

THERE CAN BE SHARED HONESTY,

WHERE TWO PEOPLE LET EACH OTHER

KNOW HOW MUCH THEY HURT... IT'S

ONLY IN THAT SETTING, IT SEEMS,

THAT HEALING CAME TAKE PLACE,

THIS HEALING OF THE SPIRIT, OF

THE SOUL, OF WHATEVER PART IS

BEING TORN APART INSIDE OF US.

AND PART OF BILL'S WORKING WITH

ALCOHOLICS WAS HE HAD THIS

THIRST FOR MORE ALWAYS, AND HE

TELLS DOWLING HOW THIS THIRST IS

JUST SOMETHING THAT... [ SIGHS ]

"WILL IT EVER BE QUENCHED?"

AND DOWLING'S ANSWER IS, "NO,

NEVER, BILL, BECAUSE WE ARE

MEANT TO THIRST."

THE QUESTION IS, "WHERE DO WE

AIM WHAT WE THIRST FOR?" AND

THAT HIS THIRST TO HELP

ALCOHOLICS WAS SURELY AN

EXPRESSION OF HIS SEEKING OF

GOD.

SO, WHAT HAPPENED... WHEN

A.A. BEGAN TO BE SUCCESSFUL, IT

WAS ELECTRIFYING.

I KID YOU NOT.

IT WAS ELECTRIFYING TO THE

PEOPLE IN THE PROGRAM AND TO

ANYBODY WHO CAME UP AND LOOKED

AT IT... FOR EXAMPLE, LIKE

JACK ALEXANDER, WHO IN '41 DID

THE ARTICLE FOR

SATURDAY EVENING POST.

HE CAME TO SCOFF.

HE CAME TO DERIDE.

HE WAS SENT TO BLOW UP THIS

CRAZY NOTION THAT THIS SPIRITUAL

PROGRAM WAS GONNA WORK.

HE STAYED TO HONOR IT.

[ UP-TEMPO CLASSICAL MUSIC

[PLAYING ]

IN FACT, THE POSTAT THAT

TIME SAID NO PICTURES, NO

ARTICLE.

SO, IF YOU WILL LOOK UP THE

MARCH 1, 1941 ISSUE OF

THE SATURDAY POST, YOU WILL SEE

A PICTURE OF THE INTERIOR OF THE

CLUB AND A PLAQUE OF US SITTING

BEFORE THE FIRE.

[ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING ]

AND WITH THE ADVENT OF THAT

PIECE, THERE WAS A PRODIGIOUS

RUSH OF INQUIRY.

[ MUSIC CONTINUES ]

DURING THIS YEAR, SOMETHING VERY

GOOD HAPPENED TO LOIS AND ME.

A MRS. HELEN GRIFFIN APPEARED AT

OUR CLUBHOUSE MEETING AT 24th

STREET.

SHE BEGAN TO TALK OF HER HOUSE

IN WESTCHESTER.

SHE SAID WE COULDN'T LIVE

FOREVER IN THE CLUB, WE'D NEED A

PLACE LIKE THAT.

THE WOMEN WAS 48 YEARS OLD

WHEN SHE BECAME HOMELESS.

WHEN THEY FINALLY DID MAKE IT TO

STEPPING STONES, BILL WRITES A

LETTER TO DR. BOB WHERE HE SAYS,

"THANK GOD THAT GIRL'S FINALLY

BEING TAKEN CARE OF AT LAST.

[ LAUGHTER ]

AND I'M A GEMINI.

[ LAUGHTER ]

I JUST WANT TO TELL YOU, I

STARTED DOING BILL'S WORK IN

'50, AND THEN IN '54 I STARTED

GOING UP TO BEDFORD HILLS.

ON FRIDAY AFTERNOON, BILL WOULD

PICK ME UP IN THE STATION.

THEN WE'D GO HOME, AND BILL

WOULD SAY, "LET'S SIT DOWN AND

DO SOME OF THE OLD CHESTNUTS."

LOIS AND BILL HAD MARVELOUS

SESSIONS WITH THE VIOLIN AND THE

CELLO.

AND SATURDAY MORNING... THAT WAS

THE WORK DAY.

AND BILL WOULD BE DICTATING,

WHICH HE LIKED TO DO.

THAT'S WHY HE'D GET UP... 'CAUSE

HE LIKED TO DICTATE AT HOME.

HE DIDN'T LIKE TO COME DOWN TO

THE OFFICE AND DO ALL THAT

DICTATING.

AND HOWEVER, I WAS TO LEARN

LATER ON WHAT WAS GOING ON IN

THIS ERA OF THE '40s THAT WAS

SUPPOSED TO BE AN ERA OF UNITY,

AND MOST OF THE TIME IT WAS AN

ERA OF DIS-UNITY.

GROUPS BEGAN TO SPRING UP

EVERYWHERE, LIKE MUSHROOMS.

WE BEGAN TO BE BOMBARDED BY

GROUP PROBLEMS.

BILL WAS THE LIGHTNING ROD.

PEOPLE WERE ALWAYS SENDING HIM

LETTERS... "OH, YOU KNOW, OUR

GROUP'S FIGHTING ABOUT THIS,"

AND, "WHAT ARE WE
GONNA DO ABOUT THAT?"

AND HE WOULD SEND BACK SOME SORT

OF SOLUTION.

AND THEN SOMEBODY WOULD BE

CHARGING FOR

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS ADMISSION,

AND SOMEBODY ELSE WOULD COMPLAIN

AND SEND HIM A LETTER.

SO, HE'D WRITE ABOUT THAT.

WE HAD AN A.A. GROUP IN

RICHMOND, VIRGINIA, THAT DRINKS

BEER AT THEIR MEETING.

WE HAVE WOMEN COMING INTO THE

FELLOWSHIP.

DR. BOB THOUGHT THAT IF THERE

WERE WOMEN AROUND, THE MEN

WOULDN'T GET SOBER.

AND ONE OF DR. BOB'S FAMOUS

SAYINGS WAS, "UNDER EVERY SKIRT,

THERE'S A SLIP."

WE HAVE THE FIRST ATTEMPTS

TO RACIALLY INTEGRATE GROUPS.

BILL HAD GONE OUT TO THE

ROCKLAND STATE HOSPITAL AND MET

A COUPLE OF BLACK ALCOHOLICS

THERE.

AND HE INVITED THEM TO COME TO

THE MEETING IN NEW YORK WHEN

THEY GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL.

WELL, WHEN THEY SHOWED UP,

MEMBERS OBJECTED.

SO, THEY TOOK A VOTE ON WHETHER

THESE TWO MEMBERS COULD BELONG

TO THE GROUP.

NOW, THESE WERE A.A. MEMBERS,

PEOPLE WHO HAD THE 12 STEPS AND

THE SPIRITUAL PROGRAM AND

EVERYTHING ELSE.

AND THEY VOTED TO EXCLUDE THESE

TWO BLACK MEN THAT BILL HAD

INVITED TO THE MEETING.

WELL, INSTEAD OF HAVING A

KNOCKDOWN, DRAG-OUT FIGHT ABOUT

IT, BILL ASKED THEM TO TAKE

ANOTHER VOTE, AND THIS VOTE WAS

WHETHER BLACK PEOPLE SHOULD HAVE

THE PROGRAM, WHETHER THEY WERE

ENTITLED TO HAVE THE A.A

PROGRAM.

AND SO THEY DID VOTE AND AGREED

THAT THEY SHOULD HAVE THE

PROGRAM.

WELL, THEN BILL GOT THEM TO LET

THE TWO MEN COME TO THE MEETING

AS OBSERVERS.

AND BILL BEGAN TO THINK

ABOUT, "WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?"

BECAUSE HE HAD... IF YOU WILL,

IF I MAY PUT IT THIS WAY, HE HAD

SOLVED THE PROBLEM OF THE

INDIVIDUAL DRUNK GETTING SOBER.

NOW, HOW DO THESE INDIVIDUAL

DRUNKS HANG TOGETHER LONG ENOUGH

TO STAY SOBER?

AND THAT'S WHERE THE TRADITIONS

COME IN.

BILL SAW THAT A.A., AS A

MOVEMENT, WOULD CEASE TO EXIST

IF THERE WEREN'T SOME SET OF

PRACTICES TO GUIDE IT.

BUT HE ALSO KNEW HOW LOUD THE

OBJECTIONS WOULD BE TO THE

THOUGHT OF ANY KIND OF

STRUCTURE.

SO HE MADE GREAT USE OF A.A.'s

NATIONAL NEWSLETTER,

THE GRAPEVINE, TO EXPLAIN THE

CONCEPTS BEHIND THE 12

TRADITIONS.

NOW, IT WASN'T ALL GOING

FORWARD WITH GREAT GUNS.

THERE WAS A LOT OF DISSENSION, A

LOT OF SECOND THOUGHT, A LOT OF

DISAGREEMENT AND ANGER.

AND BILL WAS NOT ONE TO GIVE IN.

AS I SAY, HE COULD DO A LITTLE

ARM-TWISTING WHEN IT WAS

NECESSARY.

BILL KNEW HE NEEDED TO HAVE

THE FELLOWSHIP'S APPROVAL TO

MOVE FORWARD WITH THE 12

TRADITIONS, AND WITH BOB'S

BLESSING HE SET OUT ON A

CROSS-COUNTRY TRIP TO GET IT.

YOU KNOW, ODD HE WENT TO

THREE YEARS OF NIGHT SCHOOL AND

LAW, AND HE NEVER
PICKED UP HIS DEGREE.

HE WAS DRUNK THE TIME HE WAS

SUPPOSED TO DO IT, BUT I ALWAYS

THOUGHT IT PAID OFF BECAUSE A.A.

IS A BRILLIANT INSTANCE, IN MY

OPINION, OF THE DESIGN OF

STRUCTURE OF AN ORGANIZATION FOR

SURVIVAL.

A GENIUS.

"GENIUS" IS NOT A
WORD I USE LIGHTLY.

I THINK THE MAN IS A GENIUS FOR

WHAT HE DID WITH THE 12

TRADITIONS OF

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS.

WE JUST WOULD NOT BE HERE

WITHOUT THE 12 TRADITIONS.

WE WOULD NOT BE HERE.

AND HE SHARED SO MUCH.

BILL JUST DIDN'T TALK ABOUT

ALCOHOLISM ALL THE
TIME TO PEOPLE.

HE TALKED ABOUT DEPRESSIONS.

I'VE HEARD PEOPLE COME UP TO HIM

AND SAY, "THANK YOU FOR SAVING

MY LIFE TWICE."

WITH THE PASSING OF DR. BOB,

IN 1950, BILL LOST THE ONLY

PERSON WHO REALLY UNDERSTOOD HIS

POSITION AND COULD HELP HIM

CARRY THE WEIGHT OF A.A.'s

SUCCESS.

BILL WILSON WAS REALLY

WORRIED ABOUT HOW ALCOHOLICS

ANONYMOUS WAS GONNA CONTINUE TO

RUN AND TO WORK.

HE WAS WRITING PIECES, SAYING,

"I NEED A REAL LIFE.

I JUST CAN'T BE DOING THIS

ANYMORE.

THIS THING SHOULD BE

SELF-SUSTAINING."

SO, IN 1955, BILL WAS

PREPARING FOR ST. LOUIS, WHERE

HE FORMALLY TURNED OVER

LEADERSHIP OF A.A. TO THE

MEMBERS THEMSELVES.

BACK IN 1948, DR. BOB AND I

WROTE A JOINT PIECE IN

THE GRAPEVINE.

AND WE SAID, "WHY CAN'T WE JOIN

A.A., TOO?"

WELL, THIS IS THE DAY WE JOIN

A.A.

THIS IS THE DAY YOU'LL COME OF

AGE.

BILL FORMALLY HANDED OVER THE

LEADERSHIP OF A.A. TO THE

FELLOWSHIP.

HE HAD WANTED THIS FOR 10 YEARS,

AND FINALLY THE TIME HAD COME.

BUT THE CONSTANT DEMANDS OF A.A.

HAD DRAINED BILL AND PLACED A

STRAIN ON HIS MARRIAGE TO LOIS.

THE RENTAL HOUSE BECAME NOT JUST

A HAVEN FOR BILL AND LOIS, BUT

ALSO A REFUGE FROM THE

UNRELENTING ADORATION OF THE

FELLOWSHIP.

BILL WOULD ALWAYS HAVE TROUBLE

LETTING GO OF A.A., BUT A.A.

REFUSED TO LET GO OF HIM.

HE HAD BECOME NUMBER-ONE MAN IN

THE ONE PLACE HE DIDN'T WANT

IT... A SOCIETY WHERE EVERYONE

WAS EQUAL BUT HIM.

HERE'S THE MAN WHO FOUNDED

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, BUT HE

COULDN'T BE A PLAYER IN A.A.

'CAUSE HE WAS JUST TURNED INTO

SOME SORT OF ICON, SOME SORT OF

GOD.

[ APPLAUSE ]

IT CAME HOME TO BE STRONGLY WHEN

MY SPONSOR WENT TO MEXICO

SEVERAL YEARS AGO, AND HE

MENTIONS THE FACT THAT HE HAD

MET BILL WILSON AND SHOOK HIS

HAND.

AND EVERYBODY IN THE MEETING

LINED UP AND SHOOK MY SPONSOR'S

HAND BECAUSE THAT WAS THE HAND

THAT SHOOK BILL WILSON'S HAND.

I MEAN, I JUST... I DON'T KNOW

HOW BILL WILSON DEALT WITH THAT.

[ LAUGHTER ]

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

THERE'S A RENEGADE QUALITY TO

BILL WILSON THAT, AT THE TIME,

EVERYBODY ELSE IS READY TO

CELEBRATE THE
ACHIEVEMENTS OF A .A.

BILL'S OBSESSED WITH THE PEOPLE

WHO STILL AREN'T
MAKING IT IN A .A.

AND THAT OBSESSION IS GOING TO

LEAD HIM INTO SOUND BOUNDARY

AREAS THAT COULD BRING GREAT

CONTROVERSY TO A.A...

BILL WILSON'S
EXPERIMENTS WITH LSD.

LSD... THOSE THREE LETTERS

CONJURE UP SOME DECADENT

INJURY... TIMOTHY LEARY IN THE

HEYDAY OF HAIGHT-ASHBURY.

BUT THIS WAS BEFORE THEN, WHEN

IT WAS STILL A DRUG OF PROMISE,

NOT A DRUG OF ABUSE.

ONE SURE WAY TO PROVE THAT

VALUE OF A MEDICAL PRODUCT IS BY

HOSPITAL TESTING UNDER DOCTORS'

SUPERVISION, AND THAT'S WHY I'M

PROUD TO RECOMMEND SURIN.

TAKE COMEBACK.

COMEBACK EASES...

THIS WAS THE 1950s, A TIME

WHEN THE WONDERS OF MODERN

MEDICINE SEEMED ABLE TO FIX

ANYTHING THAT WAS WRONG WITH US.

WE HAVE EARLY REPORTS COMING

FROM TWO PSYCHIATRISTS, HOFFER

AND OSMOND, REALLY PROCLAIMING

THIS AS A POTENTIAL BREAKTHROUGH

IN THE TREATMENT OF ALCOHOLISM.

AND IN THE CONTEXT, THEY'RE

DESCRIBING SOME ALCOHOLICS

BEGINNING TO HAVE A SPIRITUAL

BREAKTHROUGH UNDER THE INFLUENCE

OF THESE LSD-GUIDED EXPERIENCES

THAT ARE REALLY CONTRIBUTING TO

THEIR DEVELOPMENT OF SUSTAINED

SOBRIETY, IN INDIVIDUALS WHERE

MANY OTHER METHODS HAD FAILED.

MY NAME IS NORM.

I'M AN ALCOHOLIC.

WELL, I WENT TO A.A. IN AN

EFFORT TO QUIT.

I WANTED TO QUIT.

AND A.A. JUST DIDN'T WORK FOR

ME.

I HEARD ABOUT LSD, A DRUG THAT

SOME DOCTORS IN WESTERN CANADA

HAD FOUND OUT ABOUT AND FELT

THAT IT MIGHT HELP.

I TOOK IT SEVERAL TIMES IN

HOSPITAL SETTINGS, IN DOCTORS'

OFFICES.

EACH EXPERIENCE LASTED FOR

SEVERAL HOURS AND DID CAUSE ME

TO DO A LOT OF THINKING ABOUT

MYSELF.

AND THEN THE DOCTOR ASKED ME IF

I WOULD LIKE TO TAKE LSD AGAIN.

AND MY EXPERIENCE WAS INSTANT.

IT CHANGED MY LIFE.

IT CHANGED MY THINKING.

IT CHANGED THE WAY I LOOK AT

THINGS.

AND THAT HAPPENED IN SECONDS.

AND IT WAS OVER.

THE WHOLE EXPERIENCE WAS OVER.

I NEVER WANTED LSD AGAIN.

I WENT BACK TO A.A. AND WORKED

VERY HARD AT IT FOR A LONG TIME.

AND HE REALLY DID GO THROUGH

A PERIOD OF DEEP INFATUATION

WITH THIS DRUG IN THE THOUGHT

THAT THIS MIGHT BOTH

REVOLUTIONIZE THE TREATMENT OF

ALCOHOLISM AND ALSO BE A TOOL

FOR GREAT SPIRITUAL

ENLIGHTENMENT.

IT'S UNIMAGINABLY DIFFICULT

TO BE THAT PERSON WHOM SO MANY

RECOVERING ALCOHOLICS ARE

LOOKING UP TO WITH SUCH

EXPECTANCY, WITH SUCH UNSPOKEN

DEMANDS.

AND THIS WAS AN EXTRAORDINARY

BURDEN TO CARRY.

AND I THINK, AS HIS LIFE WENT

ON, HIS SPIRITUALITY WAS BEING

DRAINED BY THE THING HE CREATED.

AND MORE IMPORTANTLY, AS THE

YEARS WENT ON, HE FELT HIMSELF

TO BE FARTHER AND FARTHER

REMOVED FROM THAT EXPERIENCE,

THAT ENLIGHTENMENT THAT GAVE HIM

THE GIFT THAT HE GAVE TO US.

BILL USED LSD ON AND OFF FOR

OVER FIVE YEARS AS A WAY TO

EXPLORE HIS OWN SPIRITUALITY, TO

RECHARGE HIMSELF.

BUT WHEN LSD BECAME A DRUG OF

ABUSE, BILL, LIKE THE DOCTORS

WHO HAD HELPED HIM, HAD TO BACK

AWAY FROM USING IT.

SO, BILL'S SEARCH FOR WHAT HE

CALLED EMOTIONAL SOBRIETY

CONTINUED.

HE WANTED TO BE FREE OF THE

DEPRESSION AND ANXIETY THAT

PLAGUED HIM.

THEN DR. ABRAM HOFFER INTRODUCED

HIM TO NIACIN, ALSO CALLED

VITAMIN B3, AS A POSSIBLE

SOLUTION.

AFTER ABOUT TWO WEEKS, HE WAS

WELL.

HE LOST HIS TENSION, ANXIETY,

DEPRESSION, HIS INSOMNIA.

HE WAS ABLE TO SLEEP.

AND OF COURSE HE WAS, THEREFORE,

VERY MUCH HAPPIER THAN HE HAD

BEEN.

HE SAW NIACIN AS SOME KIND OF

A CURE OR AN AID IN DEALING WITH

DEPRESSION.

AND HE STARTED HANDING IT OUT TO

PEOPLE.

HE WROTE THE EQUIVALENT OF THREE

SMALL BOOKS ABOUT VITAMIN B3.

AND I THINK THIS IS PART OF THE

ENTREPRENEUR IN HIM.

HE NEEDED SOMETHING NEW TO WORK

ON.

SO, HE BECAME VERY

ENTHUSIASTIC, AND HE BECAME SO

ENTHUSIASTIC HE MADE THE

INTERNATIONAL HEADQUARTERS

PRETTY ANGRY AT HIM.

BILL DEVELOPS A PROFESSIONAL

RELATIONSHIP WITH A WOMAN,

HELEN WYNN, WHO'S OCCUPIED WITH

BILL IN THE VITAMIN B3 THERAPY

AND IN BILL'S EXPERIMENTATION

WITH LSD.

JOE WAS A...

[ LAUGHS ]

NELL DIDN'T NECESSARY WANT TO

TALK THAT MUCH ABOUT HELEN'S

RELATIONSHIP, BUT WHAT DID DID

SAY WAS THAT IN MOST OF BILL'S

DARKEST MOMENTS, HELEN PRETTY

MUCH COMFORTED HIM AND BROUGHT

HIM BACK TO LIFE, YOU KNOW,

POSSIBLY EVEN BILL'S WANTING TO

COMMIT SUICIDE, BILL'S WANTING

TO JUST, YOU KNOW, CRAWL

UNDERNEATH THE BED AND NEVER

COME OUT.

AND HELEN WYNN JUST HELPED HIM

THROUGH THAT AND HELPED HIM

THROUGH HIS DARKEST DAYS.

MY MOTHER... BLESS HER

SOUL... WAS HELEN WYNN.

SHE WAS A VERY INSPIRING HUMAN

BEING.

SHE WAS VERY JOYFUL.

SHE WAS VERY LIFE-GIVING.

HE WAS VERY INTELLIGENT.

SHE WAS VERY GRACIOUS.

SHE WAS VERY GOOD AT WHAT SHE

DID, AND SHE HAD HAD SOME

PUBLICITY WHEN SHE WAS AN

ACTRESS... PROBABLY FOR SOME OF

HER DRINKING ESCAPADES, TOO,

I THINK.

HE AND YOU AND JED THINK I'M

A BUM, WHILE YOU'RE JUST A

PERFECT WOMAN, JUST A LILY-WHITE

ANGEL.

STOP.

HOW DARE YOU TALK LIKE THAT?

GUESS WHOSE FATHER'S RIGHT.

HELEN WYNN WAS A VERY

COMPETENT EDITOR OF

THE GRAPEVINE AND SHE WROTE TO

ME IN THE MID-'50s AND ASKED ME

TO WRITE AN ARTICLE AND WE

SEEMED TO GET ALONG REAL WELL.

AND I MET HER IN 1958.

AND SHE WAS JUST MOVING UP TO

PLEASANTVILLE.

SHE HAD A YOUNG SON.

BUT IT WAS HER RELATIONSHIP WITH

BILL THAT APPARENTLY TERMINATED

HER EMPLOYMENT.

I THINK FROM THE VERY START,

THEY WERE EXTREMELY AWARE THAT

THEIR ATTRACTION TO EACH OTHER

WAS FRAUGHT WITH DIFFICULTY

BECAUSE BOTH OF THEM...

PARTICULARLY BILL... WAS

EXTREMELY CONCERNED ABOUT THE

FUTURE OF A.A.

I DO KNOW THAT COST THEM A GREAT

DEAL.

THE VERY ESSENCE OF A.A. IS

ABOUT THIS SPIRITUALITY OF

IMPERFECTION AND THE IDEA THAT,

WITHIN THAT, YOU WOULD ELEVATE

ONE OF THE CO-FOUNDERS AS SORT

OF THE PERFECT PERSON.

I DON'T THINK THERE'S ANY

ILLUSION TO THAT.

I THINK, IF ANYTHING, IT SORT OF

ADDS TESTAMENT THAT THIS

RECOVERY THING IS COMPLEX, THAT

PEOPLE CAN STAY SOBER AND HAVE

OTHER FLAWS THAT THEY'RE STILL

GONNA CONTINUE TO WRESTLE WITH

AND WORK ON.

THAT'S THE NATURE OF RECOVERY.

AND IN THIS PARTICULAR

INSTANCE, MY MOTHER ALSO

SUFFERED FROM DEPRESSION AND

DOUBT AND FEAR.

SO, IT WAS A BLESSING AND A

REVELATION TO BILL TO BE ABLE TO

BE SO OPEN AND TRUSTING AND

FEARLESS WITH ANOTHER HUMAN

BEING WHO LOVED HIM HIM FOR WHOM

HE WAS FOR SURE.

HE RECOGNIZED WHO AND WHAT MY

MOTHER WAS AND TOOK ENORMOUS

PLEASURE IN HER COMPANY.

AND I...

GOD BLESS THEM.

[ SIGHS ]

IT'S HARD FOR ME TO BELIEVE

THAT SHE COULDN'T HAVE KNOWN

ABOUT IT.

BUT LOIS WAS A VERY PRACTICAL

WOMAN, AND I THINK SHE COULD

HAVE UNDERSTOOD THIS ABOUT BILL

AND ACCEPTED IT IN HER WAY.

YOU KNOW, BILL AND LOIS HAD HAD

53 YEARS TOGETHER WHEN HE DIED.

AND SHE WAS REALLY
DEVOTED TO HIM.

HE WAS THE MAN IN HER LIFE.

IT WOULD HAVE BEEN VERY HARD FOR

THEM TO SEPARATE, I THINK.

SOME SUGAR, LADY.

YOU KNOW, BILL ADOPTED THE

ST. FRANCIS PRAYER IN HIS LATER

YEARS, GOT IT FROM

FATHER DOWLING, HIS SPIRITUAL

ADVISOR.

AND IT'S ALMOST A FORMULA.

I'VE OFTEN SAID I DON'T KNOW

THAT BILL WAS BEING AT ALL PIOUS

IN TAKING THIS PRAYER UP.

IF YOU PRESENT ME WITH HATE,

WHAT'S MY RESPONSE?

MY NORMAL, NATURAL HUMAN

RESPONSE IS TO HATE YOU,

GOOD AND SOLID.

BUT WHAT OLD FRANCIS SAID WAS,

"WHEN YOU CONFRONT THAT..."

AND BILL WILSON CONFRONTED A LOT

OF THIS IN HIS LIFE LATER ON.

PEOPLE WHO DIDN'T LIKE HIM AND

WERE JEALOUS OF HIM... YOU TURN

AROUND, AND YOU SPILL BACK OVER

THEM BENIGNITY, KINDNESS,

COMPASSION, LOVE, YOU KNOW?

THAT'S ABSOLUTELY MARVELOUS, A

MARVELOUS THING, AND BILL DID

IT.

BILL'S VISIBILITY AS THE

LEADER OF A.A. BEGAN TO REACH

SOCIETY AT LARGE.

HE WAS OFFERED AN HONORARY

DEGREE FROM YALE UNIVERSITY, BUT

BILL TURNED IT DOWN BECAUSE HE

FELT HE NEEDED TO SET THE BEST

POSSIBLE EXAMPLE FOR ANONYMITY,

CONCERNED THAT EGO-DRIVEN

MEMBERS MIGHT FOLLOW AND

THREATEN A.A.'s VERY SURVIVAL.

LIKEWISE, HE TURNED DOWN TIME

MAGAZINE'S OFFER FOR A COVER

STORY.

BILL'S CONCERNS FOR A.A.'s

FUTURE WERE TIED TO THE STATE OF

HIS OWN HEALTH.

HE WAS A LIFELONG SMOKER AND HAD

DEVELOPED EMPHYSEMA.

IN RETROSPECT, HE NEVER

REALLY RECOVERED FROM THAT FALL.

FROM EVER AFTERWARDS, HE WAS A

LITTLE MORE HESITANT AND A

LITTLE SLOWER AND SO ON,

PROGRESSIVELY SO.

BUT I MUST TELL YOU ABOUT HIS

LAST APPEARANCE.

IT WAS AT ONE OF THESE

INTERNATIONAL CONVENTIONS DOWN

IN MIAMI, FLORIDA.

AND HE CAME SUNDAY, AND THERE'S

A CLOSING PART OF THE PROGRAM.

AND AS WE WERE ALL IN THIS GREAT

BIG ROOM, BY GOD, UP ON THE

STAGE, THE CURTAINS PART, AND OF

COURSE THE PLACE JUST WENT WILD

WITH APPLAUSE AND CHEERS AND

WHAT HAVE YOU.

AND HE, WITH EFFORT, GOT HIMSELF

TO HIS FEET AND JUST MADE A

VERY, VERY SHORT TALK.

DEAR FOLKS, THERE'S ALWAYS

SOMETHING NEW IN ONE'S A.A.

LIFE.

AND WHAT DO YOU THINK IT IS WITH

ME THIS MORNING?

IT IS THAT I AM ABSOLUTELY

SPEECHLESS.

[ LAUGHTER ]

SO, I CAN ONLY SAY MAY GOD

BLESS AND KEEP YOU AND

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS FOREVER.

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

HE HAD AN OXYGEN MASK ON.

HE COULD HARDLY BREATHE.

AND I HELD HIS HAND FOR A FEW

MINUTES.

MY MOTHER WAS THERE, SOME OTHER

PEOPLE.

AND I THINK EVERYONE STOOD AT

THE BRINK OF POWERLESSNESS AND

BEWILDERMENT AND JUST STOOD

THERE WATCHING.

AND THINKING ABOUT HOW SICK

BILL WAS BEFORE HE DIED, I DON'T

THINK THE AVERAGE PERSON

REALIZES HOW SICK YOU CAN BE

WHEN YOU HAVE EMPHYSEMA AND WHEN

YOUR LUNGS AREN'T WORKING, WHEN

YOU'RE NOT GETTING ANY AIR.

IT'S TORTURE.

HE WAS SO SUFFERING FROM LACK

OF OXYGEN TO HIS BRAIN THAT HE

WAS ACTUALLY HALLUCINATING.

THE STORY CAME UP THAT, ON

HIS DEATHBED, BILL ASKS FOR

ALCOHOL.

THERE'S NOTHING TO BE SURPRISED

AT.

THIS IS THE MOST NATURAL THING

IN THE WORLD FOR AN ALCOHOLIC

WHO'S UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF

DRUGS, OBVIOUSLY.

SOME OF THE BRAIN CELLS AND

CHEMICALS ARE NOT ACTING

NORMALLY, AND I FIND NOTHING

UNUSUAL AND NOTHING TO BE

SCANDALIZED IN IT.

THIS IS THE NATURE OF

ALCOHOLISM.

THIS IS THE NATURE OF

ALCOHOLISM.

ALCOHOLISM IS... BILL REFERRED

TO ALCOHOL IN THE BOOK

"ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS" AS

"CUNNING, BAFFLING, AND

POWERFUL."

THEY SAW THIS EXTRAORDINARY

MAN WHO HAD GIVEN THIS

EXTRAORDINARY GIFT TO THE WORLD

DOING BATTLE WITH HIS PERSONAL

DEMONS WHO CAME TO HAUNT HIM, TO

ATTACK HIM AT THE END...

FIGHTING FOR HIS LIFE,

FIGHTING FOR HIS BREATH,

FIGHTING TO STAY CONSCIOUS,

FIGHTING TO KEEP EYE CONTACT, TO

HOLD ONE'S HAND, TO SAY, "I'M

STILL HERE."

THE CO-FOUNDER OF THE MOST

SUCCESSFUL EFFORT EVER TO HELP

ALCOHOLICS STAY DRY DIED LATE

SUNDAY, AND, AS HE HAD PROVIDED,

THEN GAVE UP HIS ANONYMITY.

HE WAS WILLIAM G. WILSON, "BILL"

TO THE THOUSANDS OF DRUNKS WHO

FOUND HELP IN HIS EXAMPLE, AND

WHEN HE DIED AT 76, HE HAD NOT

HAD A DRINK IN 36 YEARS.

AND HE ONCE EXPLAINED WHY A.A.s

STAY ANONYMOUS... "NOT TO AVOID

A STIGMA, " HE SAID, " BUT TO KEEP

OUR FOOL EGOS FROM RUNNING HOG

WILD AFTER MONEY AND FAME AT

A.A.'s EXPENSE."

IT'S NOT ANYTHING I'M

INCLINED TO SPILL OVER ABOUT,

BUT I AM ETERNALLY GRATEFUL THE

MAN LIVED AND DID WHAT HE DID.

YOU SAID, "WELL, SOMEBODY ELSE

MIGHT HAVE DONE IT."

YEAH, BUT HE'S THE ONE WHO DID

IT FOR ME, YOU SEE?

HE PILOTED THIS COURSE OUT OF

THE VERY DEEP WOODS THAT

ALCOHOLISM IS.

I THINK HIS CONTRIBUTION TO THE

HUMAN RACE IS OF AN ORDER THAT

HAS NOT YET BEEN FULLY REALIZED.

[ BACH'S "UNACCOMPANIED CELLO

SUITE NO. 5 IN C MINOR, BWV

1011-PRELUDE" [PLAYING ]

I'VE NOT TOLD THIS WHOLE

STORY A LOT, BUT I GOT TO BE

EDITOR OF THE GRAPEVINE.

AND, UH, NOT VERY LONG SOBER...

I THINK I WAS EDITOR FROM '63 TO

'68, AND I WAS SOBER ONLY FOUR

YEARS WHEN I GOT THE JOB.

SO, I GOT INTO IT AND WENT ALONG

FINE, ALL OF FIVE YEARS.

I THINK I WAS SOMETHING OF A

FAIR-HAIRED BOY BECAUSE I WAS

THE FIRST EDITOR IN SOME YEARS

WHO HADN'T CUT UP
AND CARRIED ON.

AND SO WE PUT AN ISSUE OUT THAT

HAD ON THE COVER
"WINDS OF CHANGE."

WELL, THAT'S NOT A GREAT WORD TO

USE AROUND A.A. CIRCUITS.

IF I HAD IT TO DO OVER, I THINK

I'D HAVE THOUGHT THAT ONE

THROUGH AGAIN.

[ CHUCKLES ]

YOU TALK ABOUT ISSUES THAT

DIDN'T MAKE THE GRADE.

I REALIZE WITHIN A FEW DAYS OF

THE EMERGENCE OF THIS ON THE

SCENE THAT I HAD CREATED A

STORM.

BUT THE THING I GOT FROM IT WAS

A LASTING, PERMANENT MEMORY OF

BILL WILSON OPERATING IN A

CRISIS.

THE CRISIS WAS ME.

AND THEY HAD TO... THEY HAD TO

MUZZLE THIS BIRD WHO WAS ABOUT

TO RUN AWAY WITH THEIR MAGAZINE.

I THOUGHT I WAS IN A FOR A

DRUBBING, YOU KNOW,
BUT NONE AT ALL.

HE SUGGESTED THAT I HAD PERHAPS

BEEN A TAD IMPRUDENT.

AND THEN WE WANDERED OFF,

TALKING ABOUT THE OXFORD GROUP

AND ITS DIFFICULTIES AND THIS

AND THAT, JUST A LOVELY

CONVERSATION.

THAT'S ALL THERE WAS TO IT.

IT WAS MY EXIT INTERVIEW.

BUT AT THIS POINT, ALL I'M DOING

IS RECORDING THAT HE WAS A VERY

GREAT GUY TO GET FIRED BY.

[ BACH'S "UNACCOMPANIED CELLO

SUITE NO. 6 IN D MAJOR, BWV

1012: GAVOTTE I/II" [PLAYS ]