All language subtitles for Spin City - 01x01 - Pilot

Good morning.

WOMAN:
Good morning.
Hey.

All right, everybody,
listen up.

As of about...
one minute ago,

the sanitation workers union
rejected our final offer.

They are now
officially on strike.

It's happening?

So let's... let's start
looking into alternative
dumpsites, all right?

Vacant lots, barges...

New Jersey.

This strike
could drag on
for days, weeks.

Maybe even months.

Mike, I need something
to tell the press.
They're killing me.

The strike's
over, Paul, finished.

Really?
Oh, yeah.

(EVERYONE SPEAKS AT ONCE)

You're not
lying to me,
are you?

I would be disappointed
if this whole thing wasn't
settled by this afternoon.

God, I love
this job.

Okay, that's only going
to buy us a couple hours,

But I'm not debating
this thing in the press.

It's only going
to hurt negotiations.

Now, you all
know the rules.

Anybody who
tells Paul the truth,

puts ten bucks
in the kitty.

It's going to be
a long day, people.

We got garbage
in the streets.

We got a weather report
calling for temperatures in
the mid-90s with no breeze.

By 11 o'clock, the city's
going to smell like
a giant foot.

People are going to
be hurling themselves
into the East River,

and we all know
who everybody's going
to blame, don't we?

Good morning,
everyone!

Hey, Flaherty,
how's our city?

Oh, couldn't
be better, sir.

That's what
I like to hear.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

The Mayor
is not happy.

Sorry to
hear about that.
How you doing?

I'm okay. Let me see
my own schedule.

Why? You're not going
to have time for any of it.

No. No. No.
No. No. No.

You gave me six nos.
There's only five
things on the list.

That last no,
that's for you.

You can use that
however you want.

Karen.
Yes, Mr. Flaherty?

I need you to get
a Mr. Sabatino
on the phone.

He's the head
of the sanitation
workers union...

Mmm-hmm.
...and he doesn't
want to talk to us,

so you're gonna have
to do me a favor, okay?

You know how,
no matter what happens,
You're always so cheerful,

it just makes us all
want to stab you
through the heart?

Uh-huh.

That's not
going to work
on Mr. Sabatino,

so you got to do me
a favor, all right?

You got to intimidate
this guy, all right?

Tap into
your darker side,

that angry corner
of your soul

where violence reigns

and terror
cracks the whip.

Okey-dokey.

It was just a
run-of-the-mill orgasm.
I didn't mean to scare you.

Could you hold
a second, Mom?

I worked up
some new numbers
for you, Mike.

Talk to me, Nikki.

We're not there yet.

I mean, forget
the health insurance
and the pension plans.

We can't even
come close to

what these
sanitation workers
are asking for.

Give it
another pass.
All right,

but I wouldn't
be optimistic.

Oh, I'll... I'll let you
get back to your mom.

Before she loses
her erection.

(IMPERCEPTIBLE)

So, yes, we do hope that
New Yorkers will continue

to bag and dispose
of their garbage
in the usual manner.

Any other questions?

Anybody have
any questions?

Any questions at all?
Anybody? Anybody?

Yes, Ashley?

So, am I to understand
that you actually believe

that garbage pickup will
resume tomorrow morning?
Yes.

Yes.

With all my heart.

That's interesting,
because I spoke
to Mr. Sabatino

about 15 minutes ago,

and... and I asked him
how long he thought
the strike might last,

and he said,
and I quote,

"How long you got?"

It's not good. No.

Why are you
beating up on Paul?

Guy's just
doing his job.

I don't
blame Paul.

I know who
has his hand
inside the puppet.

Why, thank you.
That's a lovely image.

Got any more
questions?

Yeah, I mean,
what do you hope
to gain by this?

It's a strike.
It's not like people
aren't going to notice.

Why can't you just say
no progress has been made?

'Cause
the second
I do that,

you'd make it out
to be the Mayor's fault.

Oh, so it's not
the Mayor's fault?

I'll just write
the story, uh,

"Garbage unreasonable,
refuses to be taken away."

Why do you people always
focus on the negative?

Mike, the city of New York
generates more garbage

than any other city
in the world.

We're number one.

That's great.
When we came in,
we were number three.

Whatever. You're the one
who has to sleep at night.

That's right.

Okay, then.
Okay.

See you tonight?
My place?

No problem.

All right, the Mayor
prepared to speak
about the strike, James?

I worked on it
all night, Mike.

I have six pages
of spontaneous remarks.

You know, Mike,
if I were deputy mayor,

there never
would have been
a garbage strike.

Stuart, I'm sure
there are 100 reasons

why you think
you deserve my job.

Oh, good!
You read
my manifesto.

(OVER TV)
REPORTERS:
Sir? Mr. Mayor?

REPORTER:
Any comments
on the strike, sir?

"I don't think we need
to be overly concerned."

MAYOR:
I don't think we need
to be overly concerned.

"We all want this
settled quickly."

We all want this
settled quickly. Besides...

Eighty-eight percent.

Good God,
Eighty-eight percent!
Eighty-eight percent of...

...88% of all major

union strikes end
in less than 48 hours,

so this shouldn't
drag on. Thank you.

And there's
your sound bite.

All right.
We're golden.

REPORTER: (OVER TV) Mr. Mayor,
would you consider marching

in the gay pride
parade this week?

What are
you, drunk?

What was that?

I didn't write
that, Mike.

Oh, great.
There go all our
free show tickets.

All right. It's out there.
He said it. Now what?

I tell you,
if we have

one gay person
on the staff,

this whole thing
goes away.

Everybody stop.

I need
a gay person.

Huh?

Who in this room is gay?

Not that
kind of gay.

Oh, come on.

You telling me nobody
is even leaning that way?

Do threesomes count?

Nobody even had
a gay fling?

Nobody here
went to camp?

James?

Why are you
asking me?

All righty, people.

I assume you
all get television.

I'd like to
get a jump-start
on our new problem.

All right, Paul,
we're in great shape.
We are?

Oh, sure. We're an
open administration.

We even
have prominent
gay personnel

on our staff.

We do? Who?

James.

Oh, yeah.

(TELEVISION PLAYING
INDISTINCTLY)

Eleven o'clock.

Workday is over.

Well, you're not
listening to me.

That's not the
Mayor's position.

I got to go.

What do you
want to do?

Oh, I don't know.

What do you
want to do?

We could rent
a movie.

Nah.
I don't
want to.

We could read.

No.

We could play Boggle.

That's it.
I want to
play Boggle.

(TELEPHONE RINGS)

(ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS)

(OVER SPEAKER)
Hey, Mike,
this is Paul.

Listen, we're really
getting beat up on
this parade thing.

It might be a good idea
maybe to have James
in there in the morning,

answer some
questions.
All right.

Get back to me.
I'll see you.

Have James there
to answer questions
about what?

Off the record?

What it's like
to be a gay man in
the Mayor's office.

Since when
is James gay?

Since about 5:15.

(TELEPHONE RINGS)

(ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS)

(OVER SPEAKER)
Mike, it's Stuart.

Sabatino turned
our offer down.

I've rounded
everybody up.

We're on our way over.
Be there in three minutes.

Can we do it?

Well, I could.

(GRUNTS)

I hate to say this,
but this could turn
into an all-nighter.

Oh, great.
That's just
what I need.

You know,
I got a big day tomorrow.
I got to be up at 6:00.

Maybe you
should just crash
at your place tonight.

No. I can't.

Why not?

I don't
have one.

What?

My lease,
it ran out
a few weeks ago,

and I didn't bother
renewing it.

Oh. So, then, uh...

...we live together.

Well, yeah,
I guess.

I feel I should
have been told.

We already
live together.

I mean,
it's not like I snuck
into your apartment.

I've been sleeping
here every night for
a year and a half.

As a guest.

Oh, as a guest? Really?

Look at that picture
over there, Mike.

Oh, my God.

Those aren't my parents.

They're
my parents.

Who did you
think they were?

I thought they came
with the frame.

That's my
dresser, too.

All right. okay.
Well, listen, honey,

a photo and
a dresser doesn't...

Couch.

Coffee table.
Television.

Okay.

The dog.

Not Rex.

You do live here.

Uh-huh.

Where do I live?

I... I can't believe
this is such a
big deal to you.

I mean,
we eat together.
We sleep together.

We vacation
together.

Mike, we're
each other's

"In case of emergency,
please notify" person.

I can't breathe.

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

You might want
to notify yourself.

MAYOR: (OVER TV)
What are you, drunk?

MAYOR: What's
in the journal?

"Sanitation strike
cripples city."

What about
the news?

"Mayor snubs
gay community."
(GASPS)

Anything in
the Post?

"Family dog drives
heart attack victim
to hospital..."

(SMACKS LIPS)

"...as Mayor snubs
gay community."

I love the Post.

Here are your remarks
for the dedication, sir.

"Proud to be here.

"Proud of
a community
on the rise."

Mmm-hmm.

Basically,
you're just...

you're very...

very proud.

You look
terrible, Flaherty.

We were up all night
working on this thing.

Mmm.
Ashley...

Forget I
said that, okay?

I don't want
to bother you.

No bother.
Romantic problems
are, uh...

right up my alley.

I did a little
bird-dogging in my day.

Let's hear it.

All right, uh...
well, the thing is,
Ashley feels...

You know
what you do?

Send her
to a spa.

All is forgiven
in the 100-degree mud.

Or if that doesn't work,
you name a street after her...

or a park.

They love parks.

Those are three...

...really good
suggestions, sir.

Hey.

Hey.

You've been
avoiding me
all morning.

I think
we need to talk.
Don't you?

I think that everything that
needed to be said was said.

I don't know
about that.

You dropped a bomb
on me last night.

I got a feeling
you didn't get
the reaction

you were looking for.

No, not at all.
I find hysterical paralysis

very reassuring.

I just
don't see what
the big problem is.

All we have to do
is get your old
place back.

Mike, will you tell me
why my apartment is
so important to you?

Us. Important to us.

It's our
safety net.

It's a $900-a-month
empty room that allows you
to delude yourself

into thinking
that you haven't
made a commitment.

Well... if it
does all that...

...and
it's only
900 bucks...

(SIGHS)

All right.
All right, look.

You said
commitment,
and, uh...

and I got
a little crazy, okay?

I admit that,
but I know what
you're saying,

and you're right,

so let's
go ahead.

Let's do it.

We live together.

Just like that.

Yeah.

Isn't it great?

I don't
think so, Mike.
(SIGHS)

Now I'm
really confused.

Well, I'm
confused, too.

I mean,
this is hard.
You know?

I think we should just
take some time off.

Would you like
to go to a spa?

Look, I'm sure
with work,

we'll see
each other
all the time.

You know, I think
we should just,

keep the rest
of our relationship
platonic for a while.

Oh, I see. Okay.

Just keep exactly
what we have now.

Just...

without the sex.

I'm gonna have
to vote no on that.

You know what? I really care
about you, Michael. I do.

I love you, but... I ask
for an honest reaction,

you know,
and all I get
is a joke.

I love you,
too, honey.

We're just
different.
That's all,

but, you know,
hey, hey, different is good.

You know,
that's why it's great
that we're together,

because I think
we need people like you

to keep people
like me in check,

and I think
that we need
people like me

to keep people
like you from
overthinking things.

And I think that...
that people...

...who need people...

...the
luckiest people
in the world.

See, we're different.
I would have laughed at that.

Michael, as per
your request,

I have scheduled
a press conference
this afternoon at 5 o'clock

to introduce
a key member
of our staff,

who also happens
to be homosexual,

but guess
what, Mike?

James here says
that he's not gay.

Ten bucks
in the kitty, James.

I can't take this
anymore, Mike.

I can't
take it.

I don't know
what's real
and what's not.

I don't know
day from night,
good from evil.

I'm lost.
I'm lost. I'm lost.

Don't melt down
on me, Paul.

Not today, okay?
I need you.

This is a very
emotional time.

James being gay
surprised all of us.

Especially James.

Come on, Paulie.
For me?

All right,
all right,
all right.

All right, look.
If we're going
to go through

with your charade
of a press conference,

we may as well take
a couple of minutes,

go over the sort of questions
you're going to get asked.

Is it really
going to be
that big a deal?

I mean, it's not like
it's front-page stuff.

Is it?

You might want
to call your parents.

Uh, Janelle, I'd like you
to get Ashley... Schaeffer

on the phone
for me, please.

What?

This is
getting ridiculous.
You've tried 23 times.

I don't care.

I don't feel
like an idiot.

You're not the one
making the calls.

Hey, Mike.
Mike, get over here.

This guy's
killing us.

No. This wasn't
just a slight
to the gay community.

We consider it
to be symptomatic

of a hostile
and repressive
administration.

And until we see
significant changes,

we are going to harass
and haunt the Mayor
at every turn.

We are going to make
his life miserable

over the next
four years

and make sure
there aren't

four years
after that.

Now, what do you people
have to say about that?

What can I say?

You're hired!
I love this guy.
Get him a desk.

Mike, Mike...

Uh, listen.

You know I'd do
anything for you.

I would.

And so
when you asked me
to be gay for you...

...I gave it a lot
of thought, and, uh...

Let me say first off
how honored I am
that you chose me.

James, James...
relax, okay?

You're not
gay anymore.

"Hostile
and repressive."

That's good.
That's a good line.

I thought
"Backward and medieval"
was pretty good, too.

"Morally stunted
and Machiavellian."

Look, it's very easy
to stand outside
throwing rocks.

But please, do not have
the unmitigated audacity...

Two very big words...

...to question what
I believe in, okay?

I'm offering you
a chance to come in,

sit down at the table,
and make policy.

This... this is
the opportunity
of a lifetime.

If I act now, do I get
a free set of steak knives?

The Mayor
made a mistake.

I admit that.

But what do you
want to do?

Do you want
to stay out there

and bitch
about a parade,

or do you want to come in
and make a difference?

You won't be able
to control me.

You know that.

How we doing
in here?

Mr. Mayor,
perfect timing
as usual.

I think we're
pretty close to
making a decision.

Mr. Mayor...
Yes.

...thank you
for asking me

to be a part of
this administration.

I accept...
Oh.

...and I promise you,
as long as you're in office,

I'm going to be
your worst nightmare.

Mike, is that good?

It's good.

Splendid!
Welcome aboard.

MAN: Good night, good night.
WOMAN: Good night.

We're meeting Carter
for a beer to celebrate.

You want
to join us?

Uh, no,
I don't think so.
All right.

We're meeting
at Houlihan's, right?

Yes.

Really?
'Cause I went there
the other night,

and none
of you guys showed.

Imagine that.

Can I talk
to you for
a second?

Yeah.

Talk.

Okay, I thought
that part was going
to take a lot longer,

so I'm not
really prepared...
Oh, to hell with it.

Okay, uh...

Here goes.

(EXHALES)

Are you done?
Because that was
very moving.

Would it make
any difference to you

if I gave up
my own apartment?

I don't know
what good that
would do,

seeing that neither
one of us would have
a place to live then.

Okay, 'cause I sublet
my apartment this afternoon.

Needless to say,
I was hoping

for a completely
different answer.

I just...

figured that if... we're
going to do this for real...

...we should have
a fresh start.

You sure
about this, Mike?

Maybe I didn't know
what all this meant,

but I do now.

I really...

really want us
to live together.

No nets?

I live
for danger.

(DOOR OPENS)
MAYOR: Michael?

Hello.
Walk out with me,
would you, please?

Oh, just
one thing.

Promise to tell me
if we get married.

Okay, sir, what can
I do for you?
Yeah.

Anything
I need
to know?

Uh, well, I've been
back and forth
with Sabatino all day.

I mean, I don't think
the guy realizes

what we're
offering.

I'll give him
another call.

Mike, it's a strike.
There's no quick fix here.

Now, just
let it rest.

You know, the city's
not going to fall apart

because you take
one night off.

I mean,
it probably will,

but it
will anyway.

So, where are
you off to?

A fund-raiser. Um...

Oh, yeah,
Jewish Community Center,

Rego Park.

Well, shalom, sir.

L'chayim, Mike.

(SINGS
HASIDIC SONG)

Good night,
Mr. Flaherty.
Good night, Skippy.

ASHLEY: So, where
should we live?

Chelsea? SoHo?

Tribeca?

What's wrong
with this place?

It's furnished.

Rent's cheap.

Unbelievably short
commute for me.

Okay... let me
just warn you.

(CLEARS THROAT)
Everything we do
here is on record.

Let's go
to a hotel.

What are
you doing?

Just checking
my voicemail.

(ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS)

Mike, look
at your watch.

Whoa, 11:05,
what do you know?

Workday's over.

Honey.

Fine,
it worked
for you.

Yeah, well,
it's working
for you, too.

(ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS)

(OVER SPEAKER) Hey, Mike,
this is Paul. Listen.

I'm at Houlihan's.

Where the hell
is everybody?