Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:00,640
9Sync and correction by Mlmlte
9www.addic7ed.com
2
00:00:02,220 --> 00:00:05,019
- Whoa.
- Don't lose her!
3
00:00:05,020 --> 00:00:06,960
[Bleep]!
4
00:00:12,400 --> 00:00:14,530
- Get down!
- Down! Down!
5
00:00:17,440 --> 00:00:19,200
[Cans and bottles rattling]
6
00:00:20,970 --> 00:00:22,269
[Door thuds]
7
00:00:22,270 --> 00:00:24,110
[Dog barking]
8
00:00:32,220 --> 00:00:33,319
Both: Freeze!
9
00:00:33,320 --> 00:00:35,849
[Shrieking]
10
00:00:35,850 --> 00:00:37,590
[Car alarm wailing]
11
00:00:41,430 --> 00:00:44,429
Hey, you see they had
Choco Tacos back there?
12
00:00:44,430 --> 00:00:46,199
Hell, yeah.
You want to get some?
13
00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:47,199
Yeah.
14
00:00:47,200 --> 00:00:49,130
Anybody want a Choco Taco?
15
00:00:50,640 --> 00:00:51,739
Not this guy.
16
00:00:51,740 --> 00:00:53,500
Anybody else want a Choco Taco?
17
00:00:53,510 --> 00:00:56,269
It's like a taco
with ice cream.
18
00:00:56,270 --> 00:00:57,570
It's good.
19
00:00:57,580 --> 00:00:59,079
One year ago...
20
00:00:59,080 --> 00:01:01,079
Vampire, werewolves,
and zombies...
21
00:01:01,080 --> 00:01:04,249
Descended upon California's
San Fernando Valley.
22
00:01:04,250 --> 00:01:09,089
Authorities remain baffled
by their origins.
23
00:01:09,090 --> 00:01:11,759
♪ Love is nasty
'cause it gets so rotten♪
24
00:01:11,760 --> 00:01:14,429
♪ I think it's time to put
this body in the ground♪
25
00:01:14,430 --> 00:01:18,829
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh♪
26
00:01:18,830 --> 00:01:20,100
♪ We're losing all control♪
27
00:01:20,101 --> 00:01:22,429
♪ The buildings
all turn to dust♪
28
00:01:22,430 --> 00:01:24,100
♪ And I think
it's getting closer♪
29
00:01:24,101 --> 00:01:26,669
♪ 'Cause
they're coming for us♪
30
00:01:26,670 --> 00:01:28,169
Anybody know what tonight is?
31
00:01:28,170 --> 00:01:31,939
Do not tell me it is
the season finale of Glee.
32
00:01:31,940 --> 00:01:33,979
I [Bleep] Hate that show.
33
00:01:33,980 --> 00:01:35,179
Yes, Carla?
34
00:01:35,180 --> 00:01:36,609
One-year anniversary
35
00:01:36,610 --> 00:01:38,819
of the first zombie sighting,
Captain.
36
00:01:38,820 --> 00:01:40,220
That's exactly right, Carla.
37
00:01:40,221 --> 00:01:41,650
Here, you got a little
captain ass on your nose.
38
00:01:41,651 --> 00:01:43,119
One year ago today,
39
00:01:43,120 --> 00:01:45,060
zombies began besmirching
our fine community.
40
00:01:45,061 --> 00:01:47,220
[Mic boom bangs wall]
Sorry. Sorry, sir.
41
00:01:47,230 --> 00:01:48,759
Sorry. I'm sorry.
42
00:01:48,760 --> 00:01:50,829
That's right,
I said "besmirching,"
43
00:01:50,830 --> 00:01:53,729
and with the zombies
came vampires and werewolves
44
00:01:53,730 --> 00:01:57,769
and my personal promise
that I would not rest
45
00:01:57,770 --> 00:02:01,609
until we had eradicated
this problem completely.
46
00:02:01,610 --> 00:02:02,910
Uh, captain, I thought you said
47
00:02:02,911 --> 00:02:05,009
we're supposed to contain
the problem.
48
00:02:05,010 --> 00:02:06,080
You tell me.
Are you satisfied
49
00:02:06,081 --> 00:02:07,579
containing the problem?
50
00:02:07,580 --> 00:02:08,909
'Cause if you are,
51
00:02:08,910 --> 00:02:10,410
the door is right there.
52
00:02:10,420 --> 00:02:12,120
It says "contain"
right there over your head.
53
00:02:15,090 --> 00:02:16,150
Can I move on, please?
54
00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:18,419
Thank you.
Where's your partner?
55
00:02:18,420 --> 00:02:20,059
Uh, he's in the, uh, can, sir.
56
00:02:20,060 --> 00:02:21,660
He had himself
a couple Choco tacos.
57
00:02:21,661 --> 00:02:23,260
I always tell him
he's lactose intolerant,
58
00:02:23,261 --> 00:02:25,100
but he doesn't listen to me--
Fascinating story, Stubeck.
59
00:02:25,101 --> 00:02:28,029
Okay, you tell officer Pierce
we are on high alert tonight.
60
00:02:28,030 --> 00:02:29,830
Do you understand me?
We're picking up chatter,
61
00:02:29,840 --> 00:02:31,440
and the vamps are
definitely up to something,
62
00:02:31,441 --> 00:02:33,070
and I, for one,
am taking no chances.
63
00:02:33,071 --> 00:02:34,769
So let's be vigilant.
64
00:02:34,770 --> 00:02:36,369
Let's stick together.
65
00:02:36,370 --> 00:02:38,740
And let's make sure these
nice people from channel five
66
00:02:38,741 --> 00:02:41,949
get home in one piece
with their story, all right?
67
00:02:41,950 --> 00:02:43,280
Thank you.
Thank you, captain.
68
00:02:43,281 --> 00:02:44,679
My name's Rodney.
69
00:02:44,680 --> 00:02:47,050
I've got some tips that'll help
you sound better on tv.
70
00:02:47,051 --> 00:02:48,520
Yeah, well, I got
a tip for you, too, Rodney.
71
00:02:48,521 --> 00:02:49,820
All right,
a little more than a tip.
72
00:02:49,821 --> 00:02:50,990
You know what I mean?
73
00:02:50,991 --> 00:02:52,790
I can show a man
what it is to be a woman.
74
00:02:52,791 --> 00:02:54,189
Final piece of business.
75
00:02:54,190 --> 00:02:56,329
We got a new addition
to our unit.
76
00:02:56,330 --> 00:02:59,099
Officer Landry.
Kristen, stand up, would you?
77
00:02:59,100 --> 00:03:00,599
Hey, everyone.
78
00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:03,169
Now, she is a rookie,
79
00:03:03,170 --> 00:03:05,899
but I'm sure she's
no stranger to zombies.
80
00:03:05,900 --> 00:03:07,240
Actually, I've never seen one
81
00:03:07,241 --> 00:03:08,609
in person.
82
00:03:08,610 --> 00:03:09,640
That's all right.
83
00:03:09,641 --> 00:03:11,580
Take you about two hours
around here
84
00:03:11,581 --> 00:03:13,479
to pop your cherry, huh?
85
00:03:13,480 --> 00:03:15,949
Speaking metaphorically,
of course.
86
00:03:15,950 --> 00:03:18,079
I don't mean to suggest
that you are a virgin.
87
00:03:18,080 --> 00:03:20,280
Then again,
I don't mean to suggest
88
00:03:20,290 --> 00:03:21,919
that you are not a virgin.
89
00:03:21,920 --> 00:03:23,249
Any more questions?
90
00:03:23,250 --> 00:03:25,989
Great. Let's get out there
and kill something.
91
00:03:25,990 --> 00:03:27,259
Yeah!
92
00:03:27,260 --> 00:03:31,030
[Rock music]
93
00:03:34,930 --> 00:03:36,530
Because that's
where they live, man.
94
00:03:36,540 --> 00:03:38,199
[Bleep], I live in the valley.
95
00:03:38,200 --> 00:03:40,269
Now, you want to buy me
a crib up in Malibu
96
00:03:40,270 --> 00:03:41,940
overlooking the ocean
with a barbecue pit,
97
00:03:41,941 --> 00:03:44,340
then you go right ahead--
I sure as hell won't stop you.
98
00:03:44,341 --> 00:03:46,940
Yeah, you know,
you could fit in there.
99
00:03:46,950 --> 00:03:49,009
Yeah.
Yeah, I can picture that.
100
00:03:49,010 --> 00:03:51,579
You know, yeah,
you living in a beach house,
101
00:03:51,580 --> 00:03:55,049
drinking margaritas
with Mel Gibson.
102
00:03:55,050 --> 00:03:58,189
No, no, no, not Mel Gibson.
103
00:03:58,190 --> 00:03:59,889
[Both laughing]
104
00:03:59,890 --> 00:04:02,589
[Siren wailing]
105
00:04:02,590 --> 00:04:06,260
[Rock music]
106
00:04:08,670 --> 00:04:11,769
We're staking out this motel
for vampire prostitution.
107
00:04:11,770 --> 00:04:14,639
Blood for sex is a big problem
in the valley.
108
00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:17,139
Lot of desperate guys, no cash,
109
00:04:17,140 --> 00:04:19,340
willing to do whatever
it takes to get a little action.
110
00:04:19,350 --> 00:04:20,479
That's right.
111
00:04:20,480 --> 00:04:21,910
Take those off.
It's nighttime.
112
00:04:21,911 --> 00:04:23,349
[Scoffs] Whatever, dude.
113
00:04:23,350 --> 00:04:24,519
Come on.
114
00:04:24,520 --> 00:04:27,149
[Sighs]
115
00:04:27,150 --> 00:04:29,089
Uh, what was I saying?
116
00:04:29,090 --> 00:04:31,919
[Imitating Stubeck]
Zombies, vampires.
117
00:04:31,920 --> 00:04:33,920
- I don't talk like that.
- Whatever.
118
00:04:33,930 --> 00:04:36,389
I don't.
119
00:04:36,390 --> 00:04:38,829
[Dramatically] Zombies...
120
00:04:38,830 --> 00:04:40,299
Vampires.
121
00:04:40,300 --> 00:04:42,230
I know a lot of guys
who'd cut bait and run,
122
00:04:42,231 --> 00:04:43,399
but not me.
123
00:04:43,400 --> 00:04:44,600
Want to know why?
124
00:04:49,670 --> 00:04:50,970
Damn right.
125
00:04:50,980 --> 00:04:53,179
I risk it all for them.
I'm proud to.
126
00:04:53,180 --> 00:04:56,549
You want to know why I do it?
127
00:04:56,550 --> 00:04:58,249
I do it for them.
Nice.
128
00:04:58,250 --> 00:05:00,649
Let me see that.
I said I do this for my family!
129
00:05:00,650 --> 00:05:03,189
I've had this jpeg so long,
it's like my family.
130
00:05:03,190 --> 00:05:05,160
Technically, I guess
that makes it incest.
131
00:05:05,161 --> 00:05:07,060
La-la-la-la...
Stop it. Come on, grow up!
132
00:05:07,061 --> 00:05:08,159
Stop it!
133
00:05:08,160 --> 00:05:10,429
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
Here we go.
134
00:05:10,430 --> 00:05:11,600
A fish has taken the bait.
135
00:05:11,601 --> 00:05:13,299
What fish?
136
00:05:13,300 --> 00:05:15,270
A fish is ta--
Jesus [Bleep], Billy.
137
00:05:15,271 --> 00:05:16,900
A man is going in
with a prostitute.
138
00:05:16,901 --> 00:05:18,240
- Oh!
- Come on, let's go.
139
00:05:18,241 --> 00:05:19,970
Well, let's go.
Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!
140
00:05:19,971 --> 00:05:21,740
- What are you doing?
- I'm gonna take some pictures.
141
00:05:21,741 --> 00:05:23,410
- No, stop it! Put that away.
- Come on.
142
00:05:23,480 --> 00:05:25,170
Don't. All right,
let me get my gun.
143
00:05:25,230 --> 00:05:25,960
Give me a good one.
144
00:05:26,650 --> 00:05:28,809
A little pissed.
Yeah, yeah, right there.
145
00:05:28,810 --> 00:05:30,050
[Camera shutter clicks]
146
00:05:30,051 --> 00:05:31,250
Got it.
147
00:05:32,580 --> 00:05:34,960
All right, everybody,
hands in the air.
148
00:05:36,750 --> 00:05:38,679
Wow, your hands
are really cold.
149
00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:40,620
All right, everybody,
hands in the air!
150
00:05:40,621 --> 00:05:42,889
That means you,
vampire [Bleep].
151
00:05:42,890 --> 00:05:45,859
Seriously? Vampire [Bleep]?
Be a professional.
152
00:05:45,860 --> 00:05:47,220
I wasn't doing anything.
153
00:05:47,230 --> 00:05:49,389
Sofia, how many times
are we gonna do this?
154
00:05:49,390 --> 00:05:51,530
Come on, Stubeck,
just leave a working girl alone.
155
00:05:51,531 --> 00:05:52,630
You weren't working.
156
00:05:52,631 --> 00:05:54,430
You were humping
this guy for blood.
157
00:05:54,431 --> 00:05:55,630
- No.
- Am I right?
158
00:05:55,631 --> 00:05:58,030
What are you doing?
Stop talking to them.
159
00:05:58,040 --> 00:05:59,339
[Speaking Spanish]
160
00:05:59,340 --> 00:06:00,939
I'm sorry.
I don't speak vampire!
161
00:06:00,940 --> 00:06:02,739
It's Spanish, you idiot.
Relax.
162
00:06:02,740 --> 00:06:04,270
Come on, Sofia,
you know the drill.
163
00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:05,579
Hands behind your back.
164
00:06:05,580 --> 00:06:06,680
This isn't what it looks like.
165
00:06:06,681 --> 00:06:08,680
I thought she was
just a human prostitute.
166
00:06:08,681 --> 00:06:09,910
[Mockingly] "This isn't
what it looks like.
167
00:06:09,911 --> 00:06:11,080
I thought she was
a human prostitute."
168
00:06:11,081 --> 00:06:12,250
What are we, in a cow pasture?
169
00:06:12,251 --> 00:06:13,180
'Cause I smell bull[Bleep].
170
00:06:13,181 --> 00:06:14,220
Go check the back.
171
00:06:14,221 --> 00:06:16,619
I'm gonna go check the back.
172
00:06:16,620 --> 00:06:17,720
I just told you to do that.
173
00:06:17,721 --> 00:06:18,920
You're following
an order right now.
174
00:06:18,921 --> 00:06:20,220
Hey, if I don't
get to have sex,
175
00:06:20,230 --> 00:06:21,560
then can I get my blood back?
176
00:06:21,561 --> 00:06:22,830
'Cause I'm feeling,
like, kind of faint.
177
00:06:22,831 --> 00:06:23,960
Shut up.
Don't kick.
178
00:06:23,961 --> 00:06:28,729
Smells like
a cat's balls in here.
179
00:06:28,730 --> 00:06:29,829
Aah!
180
00:06:29,830 --> 00:06:31,600
Oh.
181
00:06:34,910 --> 00:06:35,909
Oh, my God!
182
00:06:35,910 --> 00:06:37,970
- Die, pig!
- Kill him!
183
00:06:37,980 --> 00:06:39,539
Aah!
184
00:06:39,540 --> 00:06:40,740
- Oh, my God!
- Kill him!
185
00:06:40,750 --> 00:06:41,950
- [Grunting]
- Oh, my God! My God!
186
00:06:41,951 --> 00:06:44,279
Kill him!
187
00:06:44,280 --> 00:06:46,019
- Oh, my God!
- [Laughing]
188
00:06:46,020 --> 00:06:47,780
Oh, my God!
189
00:06:47,790 --> 00:06:50,749
No! I'll give you
all the blood you want!
190
00:06:50,750 --> 00:06:53,519
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
191
00:06:53,520 --> 00:06:54,590
Sit down and shut up!
192
00:06:54,591 --> 00:06:55,659
Whoa!
193
00:06:55,660 --> 00:06:56,960
Oh, my God, he's so strong!
194
00:06:56,961 --> 00:06:58,759
Oh, my God!
195
00:06:58,760 --> 00:07:00,259
Oh, my God! No!
196
00:07:00,260 --> 00:07:02,929
[Sofia laughing]
197
00:07:02,930 --> 00:07:04,740
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
198
00:07:04,741 --> 00:07:06,639
[Man crying] St...
199
00:07:06,640 --> 00:07:08,339
Dude, this is,
like, a $500 boom!
200
00:07:08,340 --> 00:07:09,669
Come on!
201
00:07:09,670 --> 00:07:10,969
Ohh!
Kill him!
202
00:07:10,970 --> 00:07:14,409
Unh!
203
00:07:14,410 --> 00:07:16,509
- Aah!
- Oh, my God!
204
00:07:16,510 --> 00:07:17,980
Oh, my God, oh, my God,
oh, my God, oh, my God,
205
00:07:17,981 --> 00:07:19,650
oh, my God, oh, my God,
oh, my God, oh, my God!
206
00:07:19,651 --> 00:07:21,020
- Shut up!
- Oh, my--
207
00:07:22,720 --> 00:07:27,119
- you know what they say
about boom poles, don't you?
208
00:07:27,120 --> 00:07:29,659
You never hear them coming.
209
00:07:29,660 --> 00:07:31,590
[Groaning]
210
00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:33,330
That was actually
a pretty good one.
211
00:07:33,331 --> 00:07:34,899
Effin' "a."
212
00:07:34,900 --> 00:07:36,899
And then you ruin it.
213
00:07:36,900 --> 00:07:38,530
[Snarls]
214
00:07:38,540 --> 00:07:40,969
[Rock music]
215
00:07:40,970 --> 00:07:45,409
♪♪
216
00:07:45,410 --> 00:07:47,909
[Copier beeping]
217
00:07:47,910 --> 00:07:51,049
How you handling everything
we threw at you so far?
218
00:07:51,050 --> 00:07:54,919
Well, I've been sitting
at my desk for four hours.
219
00:07:54,920 --> 00:07:56,089
I know that.
220
00:07:56,090 --> 00:07:57,919
I've been watching you.
221
00:07:57,920 --> 00:07:59,919
Not continually, of course.
222
00:07:59,920 --> 00:08:01,920
I've been catching up
on some paperwork.
223
00:08:01,930 --> 00:08:04,059
That's actually
a small fraction of what I do.
224
00:08:04,060 --> 00:08:06,829
I'm out on the beat
quite a bit, as it were.
225
00:08:06,830 --> 00:08:08,500
I would love to be out
on the beat.
226
00:08:08,501 --> 00:08:11,299
In time, kristen, in time.
227
00:08:11,300 --> 00:08:14,169
It--it's actually, um...
It's pronounced "Kirsten."
228
00:08:14,170 --> 00:08:16,569
What'd I say?
229
00:08:16,570 --> 00:08:18,009
Kristen.
230
00:08:18,010 --> 00:08:19,309
Say it your way.
231
00:08:19,310 --> 00:08:20,309
Kirsten.
232
00:08:20,310 --> 00:08:21,650
Okay, I'm gonna be honest.
233
00:08:21,651 --> 00:08:23,610
I'm gonna have
a little trouble with that.
234
00:08:23,620 --> 00:08:26,379
But anyway...
"Girsten,"
235
00:08:26,380 --> 00:08:27,820
let me explain
something to you.
236
00:08:27,821 --> 00:08:30,389
The valley of Los Angeles is
a long way away from Kansas.
237
00:08:30,390 --> 00:08:31,390
I'm not from Kansas.
238
00:08:31,391 --> 00:08:33,019
I'm from carefree, Arizona.
239
00:08:33,020 --> 00:08:34,020
Carefree, Arizona,
240
00:08:34,030 --> 00:08:36,159
where we are carefree.
[Laughs]
241
00:08:36,160 --> 00:08:37,360
What'd you do in carefree?
242
00:08:37,361 --> 00:08:38,630
You don't look like a golfer.
243
00:08:38,631 --> 00:08:40,559
Actually, I'm a 14 handicap.
244
00:08:40,560 --> 00:08:41,800
Means nothing to a zombie.
245
00:08:41,801 --> 00:08:43,899
You gonna kill a zombie
with a golf club?
246
00:08:43,900 --> 00:08:45,799
Well, yeah.
You want to...Unh!
247
00:08:45,800 --> 00:08:47,599
Destroy the brain, right?
248
00:08:47,600 --> 00:08:49,139
That's exactly right.
249
00:08:49,140 --> 00:08:51,380
Shoot 'em through the eyes,
run 'em over with a truck,
250
00:08:51,381 --> 00:08:52,909
crush his head in
with a crowbar.
251
00:08:52,910 --> 00:08:56,379
How's a crowbar
different than a golf club?
252
00:08:56,380 --> 00:08:59,619
You ever try to get
out of the sand with a crowbar?
253
00:08:59,620 --> 00:09:02,919
Well, well, well, if it isn't
my favorite prostitute.
254
00:09:02,920 --> 00:09:04,789
I'm kidding.
255
00:09:04,790 --> 00:09:06,819
I don't have
a favorite prostitute...
256
00:09:06,820 --> 00:09:08,190
Not in this country, anyway.
257
00:09:08,191 --> 00:09:10,759
Caught our friend here
draining the red vein, captain.
258
00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:12,930
Billy almost got his brains
bashed in by her pimp,
259
00:09:12,931 --> 00:09:14,730
but we managed to impale
the assailant
260
00:09:14,731 --> 00:09:16,230
with a boom pole
through the chest.
261
00:09:16,231 --> 00:09:17,670
- Kabob'd the bastard, huh?
- That's right.
262
00:09:17,671 --> 00:09:18,970
- Where's Billy now?
- In the can, sir.
263
00:09:18,971 --> 00:09:20,440
- Choco taco?
- And a slurpee.
264
00:09:20,441 --> 00:09:22,069
That's gonna hurt coming out.
265
00:09:22,070 --> 00:09:23,710
Your partner killed
the wrong vampire.
266
00:09:23,711 --> 00:09:26,809
Well, I guess we'll have to
live with that, then, won't we?
267
00:09:26,810 --> 00:09:29,549
- Yeah, we'll see about that.
- Ooh! Scary!
268
00:09:29,550 --> 00:09:30,979
You enjoy lockup, Sofia.
269
00:09:30,980 --> 00:09:32,979
I'm going home
to my nice, warm bed...
270
00:09:32,980 --> 00:09:35,319
Which I use for sleeping,
not sex.
271
00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:36,889
You want to know why?
272
00:09:36,890 --> 00:09:39,520
I'm a happily married man.
273
00:09:42,130 --> 00:09:45,259
Billy, let's blow this joint!
274
00:09:45,260 --> 00:09:46,330
[Pounds on door]
275
00:09:46,331 --> 00:09:47,599
Billy!
276
00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:49,969
Oh!
277
00:09:49,970 --> 00:09:51,399
Billy?
278
00:09:51,400 --> 00:09:55,300
[Ominous music]
279
00:09:55,310 --> 00:09:57,810
[Bleep]!
280
00:10:00,910 --> 00:10:03,080
Billy!
281
00:10:14,820 --> 00:10:16,949
Sofia's not talking,
but whoever snatched Billy
282
00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:18,420
sent me this video
on his phone.
283
00:10:18,421 --> 00:10:19,650
It's giving me the creeps.
284
00:10:19,660 --> 00:10:21,219
Check it out.
285
00:10:21,220 --> 00:10:22,720
[Radio playing pop song
in background]
286
00:10:22,730 --> 00:10:24,859
Well, that's the naked chicks.
287
00:10:24,860 --> 00:10:26,489
Hang on.
288
00:10:26,490 --> 00:10:28,599
"Celebrity nip slips."
289
00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:30,060
Hang on.
290
00:10:30,070 --> 00:10:31,200
Go right down--
291
00:10:31,201 --> 00:10:32,929
- [snarling]
- Aah! Unh!
292
00:10:32,930 --> 00:10:34,969
Man, Billy's got
a lot of porn on this thing.
293
00:10:34,970 --> 00:10:36,040
"Inactive glands."
294
00:10:36,041 --> 00:10:37,909
Aah!
295
00:10:37,910 --> 00:10:39,209
All right, here we go.
296
00:10:39,210 --> 00:10:40,610
[Spanish accent]
Greetings, pig.
297
00:10:40,611 --> 00:10:42,779
If you are watching
this video...
298
00:10:42,780 --> 00:10:44,110
Are you sure that's Billy?
299
00:10:44,111 --> 00:10:47,349
No, but I can't say
it's not him, right?
300
00:10:47,350 --> 00:10:48,479
[Muffled] Hey!
301
00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:50,449
[Inaudible]
302
00:10:50,450 --> 00:10:52,889
Here's the part
where they tell me
303
00:10:52,890 --> 00:10:54,590
to go to Griffith park
with the body...
304
00:10:54,591 --> 00:10:56,589
- [Growling]
- Aah!
305
00:10:56,590 --> 00:10:57,889
Unarmed and alone.
306
00:10:57,890 --> 00:10:59,660
Well, I guess that's
what we got to do, then.
307
00:10:59,661 --> 00:11:00,859
Seriously?
308
00:11:00,860 --> 00:11:01,859
Unh!
309
00:11:01,860 --> 00:11:03,100
Did they say what they'd do
310
00:11:03,101 --> 00:11:04,600
if you went in there
with backup?
311
00:11:04,601 --> 00:11:05,770
Yeah, they'll kill Billy.
312
00:11:05,771 --> 00:11:07,799
Well, there you go, then.
313
00:11:07,800 --> 00:11:10,100
They always say that.
They have to say that.
314
00:11:10,110 --> 00:11:11,910
Well, it doesn't mean
they won't do it.
315
00:11:11,911 --> 00:11:13,370
I'm not going without backup.
316
00:11:13,380 --> 00:11:14,709
Don't be such a girl.
317
00:11:14,710 --> 00:11:17,309
- [Growling]
- Unh!
318
00:11:17,310 --> 00:11:19,949
Fine, I'll think about it.
319
00:11:19,950 --> 00:11:22,019
[Taps glass]
320
00:11:22,020 --> 00:11:23,849
How's she working out?
321
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:25,049
Eh, you know,
322
00:11:25,050 --> 00:11:26,950
I'm not that impressed.
Yeah.
323
00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:29,959
[Rock music]
324
00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:34,729
♪♪
325
00:11:34,730 --> 00:11:35,759
- Yo.
- Hmm?
326
00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:37,929
Guess what I rented last night.
327
00:11:37,930 --> 00:11:39,330
- Hmm?
- Big fat Greek wedding.
328
00:11:39,340 --> 00:11:40,669
What'd you think?
329
00:11:40,670 --> 00:11:41,999
Eh, not for me.
330
00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:43,910
[Over radio] Unit 23,
unit 23, do you copy?
331
00:11:43,911 --> 00:11:46,839
Officer Rinaldi here.
Copy.
332
00:11:46,840 --> 00:11:48,640
We have a report of a 1-11
in progress
333
00:11:48,641 --> 00:11:51,379
at Wiggly's donuts,
1327 Chatsworth.
334
00:11:51,380 --> 00:11:52,949
Please report. Over.
335
00:11:52,950 --> 00:11:56,720
Affirmative. Officer Johnson
and I are en route. Over.
336
00:11:58,090 --> 00:11:59,919
Slow-Walker zombie.
337
00:11:59,920 --> 00:12:02,659
The fresh ones,
they move pretty well,
338
00:12:02,660 --> 00:12:04,330
but when they've been
undead too long,
339
00:12:04,331 --> 00:12:05,659
we call that a 1-11.
340
00:12:05,660 --> 00:12:07,290
Uh-huh,
at Wiggly's donuts.
341
00:12:07,300 --> 00:12:08,660
Now, that's
what I'm talking about.
342
00:12:08,661 --> 00:12:10,760
You know, I can go
for a bear claw right now.
343
00:12:10,770 --> 00:12:13,299
- [Laughs] Right.
- Hit those lights, baby.
344
00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:16,499
[Siren wailing]
345
00:12:16,500 --> 00:12:19,309
[Rock music]
346
00:12:19,310 --> 00:12:22,379
♪♪
347
00:12:22,380 --> 00:12:25,349
Yeah, yeah.
[Laughs]
348
00:12:25,350 --> 00:12:27,449
[Muzak playing]
Sure. Yeah.
349
00:12:27,450 --> 00:12:28,979
Cool.
350
00:12:28,980 --> 00:12:30,480
What the hell are you doing?
351
00:12:30,490 --> 00:12:31,720
What you mean,
what the hell I'm doing?
352
00:12:31,721 --> 00:12:32,990
I'm getting a dozen.
353
00:12:32,991 --> 00:12:34,989
You can't wait?
354
00:12:34,990 --> 00:12:39,189
Um, I don't think
he's going anywhere.
355
00:12:39,190 --> 00:12:40,630
You know, you're not helping
the cop stereotype
356
00:12:40,631 --> 00:12:42,629
with this doughnut crap.
357
00:12:42,630 --> 00:12:43,830
[Scoffs] Who cares?
358
00:12:43,831 --> 00:12:46,899
It's the only stereotype
worth living up to.
359
00:12:46,900 --> 00:12:50,139
Hey, check it out,
John-John.
360
00:12:50,140 --> 00:12:52,209
Big man's still got
a doughnut in his mouth.
361
00:12:52,210 --> 00:12:54,539
That's not a doughnut.
That's a hand.
362
00:12:54,540 --> 00:12:56,740
What? A hand?
[Objects clattering]
363
00:12:56,750 --> 00:12:58,209
Oh, I'm sorry.
364
00:12:58,210 --> 00:12:59,379
My bad.
365
00:12:59,380 --> 00:13:00,380
I didn't see it.
366
00:13:00,381 --> 00:13:01,380
Aah! Jesus!
367
00:13:01,381 --> 00:13:04,749
[Snarling]
368
00:13:04,750 --> 00:13:06,389
Jesus, John-John!
369
00:13:06,390 --> 00:13:08,319
What?
370
00:13:08,320 --> 00:13:10,089
You want to check the back?
371
00:13:10,090 --> 00:13:11,130
Sound's still speeding.
372
00:13:11,131 --> 00:13:12,959
Shut the [Bleep] Up.
Be still.
373
00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:14,300
No, I don't want to
check the back!
374
00:13:14,301 --> 00:13:16,929
I want to get a bear claw!
Check the back.
375
00:13:16,930 --> 00:13:18,399
[Bleep] Damn!
376
00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:20,599
Oh-ho-ho.
377
00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:22,699
Oh, we're pulling our gun
out now. I see.
378
00:13:22,700 --> 00:13:24,370
You see how dark it is
back there?
379
00:13:24,371 --> 00:13:25,940
It's like
the [Bleep]Damn black hole.
380
00:13:25,941 --> 00:13:27,309
Check the back.
381
00:13:27,310 --> 00:13:29,939
[Door thuds] Mother[Bleep]!
382
00:13:29,940 --> 00:13:31,949
[Ominous music]
383
00:13:31,950 --> 00:13:34,649
♪♪
384
00:13:34,650 --> 00:13:36,780
- Oh, [Bleep]!
- What happened?
385
00:13:36,790 --> 00:13:39,619
[Panting]
386
00:13:39,620 --> 00:13:41,790
Nothing.
It's just--it's nothing.
387
00:13:44,960 --> 00:13:47,959
[Rock music]
388
00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:55,900
♪♪
389
00:14:03,210 --> 00:14:05,479
Anybody here?
390
00:14:05,480 --> 00:14:07,479
Hello!
391
00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:09,749
Callate.
392
00:14:09,750 --> 00:14:11,319
You surprised me.
393
00:14:11,320 --> 00:14:12,949
I didn't hear you coming.
394
00:14:12,950 --> 00:14:14,589
Be still.
395
00:14:14,590 --> 00:14:16,790
Yeah, completely still.
396
00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:24,299
Where's Mateo?
397
00:14:24,300 --> 00:14:26,799
I'm sorry.
I'm--I'm lost.
398
00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:28,600
Are we here to exchange
the same--
399
00:14:28,601 --> 00:14:30,969
- where's the body?
[Vampires snarling]
400
00:14:30,970 --> 00:14:33,109
You don't get Billy
401
00:14:33,110 --> 00:14:35,839
until we get the body.
402
00:14:35,840 --> 00:14:38,409
All right. Yeah,
you could have just asked me.
403
00:14:38,410 --> 00:14:40,149
- I did ask you.
- Yeah, kind of,
404
00:14:40,150 --> 00:14:42,679
but I don't understand
what you're saying, so...
405
00:14:42,680 --> 00:14:44,080
The body!
406
00:14:44,090 --> 00:14:46,619
Yeah, absolutely, the body.
407
00:14:46,620 --> 00:14:48,619
Hang on.
408
00:14:48,620 --> 00:14:50,520
Where's Billy?
409
00:14:50,530 --> 00:14:52,859
You'll see Billy.
410
00:14:52,860 --> 00:14:57,360
First I want to see Mateo.
411
00:14:57,370 --> 00:14:59,469
Which is...
412
00:14:59,470 --> 00:15:00,500
- The body.
- The body.
413
00:15:00,501 --> 00:15:02,499
Got it.
We're on the same page.
414
00:15:02,500 --> 00:15:04,870
Great.
I'll get him.
415
00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:17,849
Uh, do you guys want
to help me out with this?
416
00:15:17,850 --> 00:15:19,920
I have a lower-back thing.
It flares up sometimes.
417
00:15:19,921 --> 00:15:21,919
Okay.
Got it.
418
00:15:21,920 --> 00:15:23,960
There we go.
We got it. Great.
419
00:15:25,790 --> 00:15:29,329
On your knees.
420
00:15:29,330 --> 00:15:30,800
Hands to your head!
421
00:15:34,180 --> 00:15:37,179
[Rock music]
422
00:15:37,180 --> 00:15:42,349
♪♪
423
00:15:42,350 --> 00:15:45,219
Hands to your head!
424
00:15:45,220 --> 00:15:46,590
[Zipper opens]
425
00:15:48,290 --> 00:15:49,730
Okay, where's Billy?
426
00:15:53,860 --> 00:15:56,460
You stay still.
427
00:15:56,470 --> 00:15:59,229
Revisalo.
428
00:15:59,230 --> 00:16:00,370
[Zipper opens]
429
00:16:18,820 --> 00:16:20,590
[Whistles]
430
00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:25,389
[Groaning]
431
00:16:25,390 --> 00:16:27,529
What'd you do to him,
you son of a bitch?
432
00:16:27,530 --> 00:16:30,399
He killed my brother, Cochino!
433
00:16:30,400 --> 00:16:32,970
Corta la cuerda.
434
00:16:35,100 --> 00:16:36,500
No.
435
00:16:36,510 --> 00:16:38,569
No.
436
00:16:38,570 --> 00:16:41,510
Cambie mi mente.
437
00:16:47,250 --> 00:16:48,379
Matalo!
438
00:16:48,380 --> 00:16:49,680
Stay back!
439
00:16:49,690 --> 00:16:52,889
Stay back!
440
00:16:52,890 --> 00:16:54,090
[Remote chirps]
441
00:16:54,091 --> 00:16:55,259
Aah!
442
00:16:55,260 --> 00:16:57,689
[Vampires groaning]
443
00:16:57,690 --> 00:16:59,360
Come on, buddy,
let's get out of here!
444
00:16:59,361 --> 00:17:00,530
Lean back, lean back!
445
00:17:00,531 --> 00:17:01,760
All right, hop!
446
00:17:01,770 --> 00:17:03,030
Hop, hop, hop! Hop!
447
00:17:03,031 --> 00:17:04,729
[Gunshot]
448
00:17:04,730 --> 00:17:07,269
Dive! Dive!
Feet up!
449
00:17:07,270 --> 00:17:09,539
[Gunshots]
450
00:17:09,540 --> 00:17:12,369
Jesus, dude, you let one
rip in here
451
00:17:12,370 --> 00:17:13,640
before you got out?
452
00:17:13,641 --> 00:17:15,139
Dead vampire, Billy.
453
00:17:15,140 --> 00:17:17,179
Dead vampire.
454
00:17:17,180 --> 00:17:18,150
[Snarls]
455
00:17:24,620 --> 00:17:26,820
[Crying]
456
00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:30,830
[Growling]
457
00:17:33,230 --> 00:17:34,399
Mother[Bleep].
458
00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:37,230
[Zombie screaming]
459
00:17:43,910 --> 00:17:45,070
Aah!
460
00:17:46,810 --> 00:17:47,809
[Hissing]
461
00:17:47,810 --> 00:17:50,279
Jesus!
462
00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:51,849
[Grunting]
463
00:17:51,850 --> 00:17:53,980
[John-John shouts]
464
00:17:55,150 --> 00:17:58,549
[Boom mic guy screaming]
465
00:17:58,550 --> 00:18:02,259
[Bleep]!
466
00:18:02,260 --> 00:18:05,359
[Screaming and sobbing]
467
00:18:05,360 --> 00:18:07,059
Oh, God!
468
00:18:07,060 --> 00:18:08,159
Ohh!
469
00:18:08,160 --> 00:18:10,629
- Whoa! Whoa! Shut up!
- Aah!
470
00:18:10,630 --> 00:18:12,170
- Shut the [Bleep] Up!
- Calm down, man.
471
00:18:12,171 --> 00:18:13,939
- All right!
- [Bleep] Damn!
472
00:18:13,940 --> 00:18:15,039
All right!
473
00:18:15,040 --> 00:18:16,270
Acting like a [Bleep].
474
00:18:16,271 --> 00:18:17,709
Calm down.
475
00:18:17,710 --> 00:18:19,309
[Bleep], get some balls.
476
00:18:19,310 --> 00:18:20,979
Whoo.
477
00:18:20,980 --> 00:18:22,809
[Laughing] [Mockingly] Ha ha!
478
00:18:22,810 --> 00:18:26,479
I mean, this [Bleep] Night.
479
00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:28,619
Aah!
480
00:18:28,620 --> 00:18:32,349
Aah! Aah!
481
00:18:32,350 --> 00:18:34,819
[Gunshot]
482
00:18:34,820 --> 00:18:38,359
[Exhales deeply]
483
00:18:38,360 --> 00:18:40,329
Oh, check this [Bleep].
484
00:18:40,330 --> 00:18:42,999
What are you guys looking at?
485
00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,769
You got bit, man.
486
00:18:44,770 --> 00:18:47,039
It means you're done.
487
00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:48,839
Real done.
488
00:18:48,840 --> 00:18:50,139
[Laughs nervously]
489
00:18:50,140 --> 00:18:52,009
What are you guys
talking about?
490
00:18:52,010 --> 00:18:53,509
I'm your sound guy!
491
00:18:53,510 --> 00:18:56,609
It's the valley, man.
492
00:18:56,610 --> 00:18:59,249
There's lots of sound guys.
493
00:18:59,250 --> 00:19:00,880
[Loud smack]
494
00:19:07,020 --> 00:19:09,889
We deal with this all the time.
495
00:19:09,890 --> 00:19:11,389
Good evening, officer.
496
00:19:11,390 --> 00:19:13,100
Sir, I'm gonna need you
to turn the truck off.
497
00:19:13,101 --> 00:19:14,259
[Sighs] Okay.
498
00:19:14,260 --> 00:19:16,260
Turn into a werewolf tonight?
499
00:19:16,270 --> 00:19:19,269
I, um--
I know how this looks.
500
00:19:19,270 --> 00:19:22,069
I was at the library,
and I--[Grunts]
501
00:19:22,070 --> 00:19:23,270
You're clearly
a werewolf right now.
502
00:19:23,271 --> 00:19:24,639
You're halfway there.
503
00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:26,280
You're shirt's ripped up.
You got a hairy belly.
504
00:19:26,281 --> 00:19:27,480
I was waiting for a computer.
505
00:19:27,481 --> 00:19:29,009
I couldn't get online.
506
00:19:29,010 --> 00:19:30,280
Well, you know the deal.
It's a full moon.
507
00:19:30,281 --> 00:19:31,550
You gotta lock
yourself in, all right?
508
00:19:31,551 --> 00:19:32,550
So turn around.
We're gonna turn 'em around
509
00:19:32,551 --> 00:19:33,680
and cuff 'em, okay?
510
00:19:33,681 --> 00:19:34,950
He'll sleep it off.
It's fine.
511
00:19:34,951 --> 00:19:36,350
- Just turn around--
- Officer, did you see that guy?
512
00:19:36,351 --> 00:19:37,449
What?
513
00:19:37,450 --> 00:19:40,859
Hey, come on!
Get him!
514
00:19:40,860 --> 00:19:44,129
My partner never knows
when to get people.
515
00:19:44,130 --> 00:19:47,999
[Panting] [Wolf howls]
516
00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:49,729
All right, you're free to go.
517
00:19:49,730 --> 00:19:52,869
He's free to go.
518
00:19:52,870 --> 00:19:54,869
If they can run like that,
we let them go.
519
00:19:54,870 --> 00:19:56,580
[Panting] Hoo!
520
00:19:56,880 --> 00:19:58,750
9Sync and correction by Mlmlte
9www.addic7ed.com34619
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.