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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,869 "Will & Grace" is recorded in front of 2 00:00:01,893 --> 00:00:04,493 a live studio audience. 3 00:00:06,287 --> 00:00:08,265 Mmm. 4 00:00:08,289 --> 00:00:11,035 - Is this weird? - No, I think it's so sweet 5 00:00:11,059 --> 00:00:13,337 that you go "Mm" every time we kiss. 6 00:00:13,361 --> 00:00:14,905 It's like I'm on a tasting menu. 7 00:00:14,929 --> 00:00:16,974 No, I... I... 8 00:00:16,998 --> 00:00:18,575 I meant that we live in the same building. 9 00:00:18,599 --> 00:00:20,644 I mean, that's not a problem, right? 10 00:00:20,668 --> 00:00:23,247 That part's great. 11 00:00:23,271 --> 00:00:25,805 - Good night. - Okay. 12 00:00:29,911 --> 00:00:32,156 - Where have you been, missy? - Oh, God! 13 00:00:32,180 --> 00:00:35,559 Your mother and I have been worried sick. 14 00:00:35,583 --> 00:00:37,938 Grace Louise, if you're in a family way, 15 00:00:37,962 --> 00:00:39,615 we'll raise it as your little sister 16 00:00:39,639 --> 00:00:41,721 - even if it's a boy. - Mm. 17 00:00:42,523 --> 00:00:44,593 So how was the date? 18 00:00:44,617 --> 00:00:47,762 Uhh! So good! 19 00:00:47,786 --> 00:00:49,142 Tell me everything! 20 00:00:49,143 --> 00:00:51,822 What's his name? What's his favorite "Real Housewife"? 21 00:00:51,846 --> 00:00:54,425 Where did you meet him? 22 00:00:54,449 --> 00:00:57,962 James. He's straight. 23 00:00:57,986 --> 00:00:59,630 The laundry room, last week. 24 00:00:59,654 --> 00:01:03,300 Big whoop. I fooled around with two guys at a laundry mat. 25 00:01:03,324 --> 00:01:06,409 First I fluffed them and then I folded them. 26 00:01:07,962 --> 00:01:09,573 Of course, this was before I was in 27 00:01:09,597 --> 00:01:12,443 a monogamous relationship with my boyfriend Drew. 28 00:01:12,467 --> 00:01:14,860 You are really getting good at saying that. 29 00:01:14,884 --> 00:01:17,870 You don't make that pinched anus face anymore. 30 00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:20,584 - I've been practicing. - Mm. 31 00:01:20,608 --> 00:01:22,623 So how's your mom doing with it? 32 00:01:22,647 --> 00:01:25,192 Oh, sadly, Mother's not on board. 33 00:01:25,216 --> 00:01:29,215 It gets in way of her dream of us retiring together. 34 00:01:30,208 --> 00:01:31,442 So how's this gonna work... 35 00:01:31,466 --> 00:01:32,610 you dating a guy in the building? 36 00:01:32,634 --> 00:01:34,211 'Cause I've seen you get the mail 37 00:01:34,235 --> 00:01:35,779 in nothing but a mud mask and that big t-shirt 38 00:01:35,803 --> 00:01:40,017 that says, "It was me. I let the dogs out." 39 00:01:40,041 --> 00:01:41,552 James and I are adults. 40 00:01:41,576 --> 00:01:44,121 There's no reason why this has to be weird or complicated. 41 00:01:44,145 --> 00:01:45,523 All right. 42 00:01:45,547 --> 00:01:47,725 Ooh! Mmm. 43 00:01:47,749 --> 00:01:49,226 Hi, James. 44 00:01:49,250 --> 00:01:50,828 Mm-hmm. 45 00:01:50,852 --> 00:01:52,296 Mm-hmm. 46 00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:54,465 Okay. Mm-hmm. 47 00:01:54,489 --> 00:01:56,600 Okay. 48 00:01:56,624 --> 00:01:59,709 It's over. James thinks it's too weird and complicated. 49 00:02:00,428 --> 00:02:02,695 What? He broke up with you? 50 00:02:03,532 --> 00:02:05,476 Okay. You know the drill. 51 00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:07,445 We'll open wine, I'll find sugar. 52 00:02:07,469 --> 00:02:09,030 There's frozen pie crust. 53 00:02:09,054 --> 00:02:10,548 Do you want me to thaw it or do you just wanna 54 00:02:10,572 --> 00:02:12,483 go at it as it is, it's your call. 55 00:02:12,507 --> 00:02:14,218 Now, I'm gonna show you how to get over a guy 56 00:02:14,242 --> 00:02:16,454 - the gay way. - Does it involve cardio? 57 00:02:16,478 --> 00:02:18,277 - Kind of. - Ugh. 58 00:02:18,301 --> 00:02:21,458 Mother always said the best way to get over one guy 59 00:02:21,482 --> 00:02:25,552 is to get under, behind and sideways with another one. 60 00:02:30,878 --> 00:02:38,964 Synced & corrected by -robtor- www.addic7ed.com 61 00:02:38,988 --> 00:02:40,180 All right. 62 00:02:40,648 --> 00:02:42,480 I am off to the tennis club. 63 00:02:42,504 --> 00:02:43,881 I know what you're thinking, didn't I 64 00:02:43,905 --> 00:02:45,266 already work out this morning? 65 00:02:45,290 --> 00:02:47,979 Yes, but if I burn off a few more calories 66 00:02:48,003 --> 00:02:50,348 after work, I can hit the Pressed Juicery. 67 00:02:50,372 --> 00:02:52,143 I know, those things are pure sugar. 68 00:02:52,167 --> 00:02:53,936 But what can I say? I love 'em. 69 00:02:53,960 --> 00:02:56,672 Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 70 00:02:56,696 --> 00:02:58,073 Oh, my God. I didn't know 71 00:02:58,097 --> 00:03:00,806 this was gonna be a story about juice. 72 00:03:03,035 --> 00:03:05,347 You know what? Back it up, start from the beginning 73 00:03:05,371 --> 00:03:07,282 and really drag it out this time. 74 00:03:07,306 --> 00:03:09,485 Okay? 75 00:03:09,509 --> 00:03:13,128 You know what's great about us working together 76 00:03:13,152 --> 00:03:15,724 and being around each other all day now? 77 00:03:15,748 --> 00:03:17,659 'Cause I don't. 78 00:03:17,683 --> 00:03:19,761 All the hens in the accounting department 79 00:03:19,785 --> 00:03:21,029 think you're a drip. 80 00:03:21,053 --> 00:03:22,498 I am the accounting department. 81 00:03:22,522 --> 00:03:24,522 Then you know. 82 00:03:25,542 --> 00:03:26,971 Good-bye. 83 00:03:33,196 --> 00:03:36,734 - What are you watching? - M'story. 84 00:03:37,563 --> 00:03:39,072 It's called "M'Servants," 85 00:03:39,096 --> 00:03:42,139 filmed live from m'kitchen. 86 00:03:42,998 --> 00:03:45,678 - You spy on your staff? - More than that. 87 00:03:45,702 --> 00:03:47,879 I control everything that happens in the manse 88 00:03:47,903 --> 00:03:48,886 from this phone. 89 00:03:48,910 --> 00:03:50,461 Alarms, temperature, music, 90 00:03:50,485 --> 00:03:53,216 when it's time for the INS duck and cover. 91 00:03:55,977 --> 00:03:58,089 It's like an interactive telenovela. 92 00:03:58,113 --> 00:04:00,591 Check it. Margot's greatest fear 93 00:04:00,615 --> 00:04:02,660 is having to tell the missus that she broke 94 00:04:02,684 --> 00:04:04,996 yet another tray of glasses. 95 00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:12,074 AmericasCardroom.com brings poker back Million Dollar Sunday Tournament every Sunday 96 00:04:13,962 --> 00:04:18,331 They're Waterford. It'll take her years to pay me back. 97 00:04:20,869 --> 00:04:23,398 This is... this is the most invasive, 98 00:04:23,422 --> 00:04:25,550 morally bankrupt thing I... 99 00:04:25,574 --> 00:04:27,674 jeez Louise, those guys are hot. 100 00:04:28,469 --> 00:04:30,258 Yeah, well, they wouldn't be on TV if they weren't. 101 00:04:30,282 --> 00:04:31,855 It's not the BBC. 102 00:04:32,881 --> 00:04:35,460 That's Cook 103 00:04:35,484 --> 00:04:36,609 and that's Pastry Chef. 104 00:04:36,633 --> 00:04:39,050 My theory is they're fighting over a girl. 105 00:04:39,051 --> 00:04:41,396 But it's hard to be sure because they speak 106 00:04:41,420 --> 00:04:43,058 in their secret code. 107 00:04:44,257 --> 00:04:45,727 You mean Spanish? 108 00:04:47,894 --> 00:04:50,939 Whoa, did you see that smoldering look? 109 00:04:50,963 --> 00:04:52,157 I think they're in love. 110 00:04:52,181 --> 00:04:53,609 That's sexual tension. 111 00:04:53,633 --> 00:04:56,400 It's the same look Lindsey Graham gives John McCain. 112 00:04:58,004 --> 00:05:00,048 - They're gay? - Mm-hmm. 113 00:05:00,072 --> 00:05:02,577 They don't look alike. 114 00:05:08,041 --> 00:05:10,659 Karen, we shouldn't be watching them like this. 115 00:05:10,683 --> 00:05:13,250 Come to my desk. I have a bigger screen. 116 00:05:19,887 --> 00:05:21,198 What about him? He looks straight. 117 00:05:21,222 --> 00:05:23,666 You're into that now, right? 118 00:05:24,700 --> 00:05:27,692 Hooking up with a stranger... it's not me. 119 00:05:27,899 --> 00:05:29,077 Because you're a prude. 120 00:05:29,101 --> 00:05:30,605 I'm not a prude. 121 00:05:31,136 --> 00:05:33,114 I've had sex in an elevator. 122 00:05:33,138 --> 00:05:35,550 In the words of the horse-loving beauty 123 00:05:35,574 --> 00:05:37,070 Shania Twain... 124 00:05:38,176 --> 00:05:39,823 that don't impress me much. 125 00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:43,692 Oh, it's my mother. 126 00:05:43,716 --> 00:05:45,827 She can't stand it when I don't pick up. 127 00:05:45,851 --> 00:05:47,867 And decline. 128 00:05:49,121 --> 00:05:51,165 Oh, my God. Hello. 129 00:05:51,189 --> 00:05:54,023 So she wants to drive a Silverado. 130 00:05:55,213 --> 00:05:57,355 Grace Adler. 131 00:05:57,379 --> 00:05:59,056 Well, what a surprise. 132 00:05:59,080 --> 00:06:01,759 Oh, Jack, Jack, um... 133 00:06:01,783 --> 00:06:03,227 this is Jerry Wise, 134 00:06:03,251 --> 00:06:05,863 - my college lit professor. - Hello. 135 00:06:05,887 --> 00:06:07,832 Professor Wise is a legend. 136 00:06:07,856 --> 00:06:10,167 I mean, so inspirational. 137 00:06:10,191 --> 00:06:14,572 He used to say, I would rather be a success as a fish 138 00:06:14,596 --> 00:06:16,941 than a failure as a fish 139 00:06:16,965 --> 00:06:20,405 trying to be a bird. 140 00:06:28,163 --> 00:06:29,956 I don't get that. 141 00:06:31,541 --> 00:06:33,998 Well, I hope that you're still being a fish. 142 00:06:34,022 --> 00:06:35,555 Oh, please. Me a bird? 143 00:06:37,959 --> 00:06:40,383 None of this means anything, right? 144 00:06:42,764 --> 00:06:44,909 Grace, it's very nice seeing you again. 145 00:06:44,933 --> 00:06:47,100 Bye. 146 00:06:48,069 --> 00:06:50,314 - I slept with him in college. - Impressed? 147 00:06:50,338 --> 00:06:52,954 Please, I fooled around with so many professors 148 00:06:52,978 --> 00:06:55,808 in college and they all magna came loudly. 149 00:06:57,630 --> 00:06:59,441 Karen, I love this show, but the will-they-won't-they 150 00:06:59,465 --> 00:07:01,226 - is killing me. - Honey, I've turned 151 00:07:01,250 --> 00:07:02,678 the heat up as high as it'll go, 152 00:07:02,702 --> 00:07:04,847 but there's still no gay porn. 153 00:07:06,234 --> 00:07:07,368 That's 'cause a good gay porno 154 00:07:07,392 --> 00:07:09,125 needs the right kinda music. 155 00:07:09,475 --> 00:07:11,623 Or so I've read in academic journals. 156 00:07:20,920 --> 00:07:23,832 - Ohh. - It's happening. 157 00:07:23,856 --> 00:07:26,090 It's happening! 158 00:07:33,466 --> 00:07:34,676 - So close! - Devil! 159 00:07:34,700 --> 00:07:36,278 Okay, we blew it 160 00:07:36,302 --> 00:07:37,746 with the music, that's on me. 161 00:07:37,770 --> 00:07:40,215 That's it. I'm switching over to my limo. 162 00:07:40,239 --> 00:07:43,969 When we last left Driver, he was upside down in a ditch. 163 00:07:43,993 --> 00:07:46,421 No, no, no, no, no. I'm... 164 00:07:46,445 --> 00:07:48,654 I'm too invested in the love story. 165 00:07:48,678 --> 00:07:50,155 Well, so am I. 166 00:07:50,179 --> 00:07:52,658 Gosh, I haven't rooted this hard for a gay couple 167 00:07:52,682 --> 00:07:56,209 to get together on TV since Frasier and Niles. 168 00:07:57,663 --> 00:07:58,829 They were brothers. 169 00:07:58,853 --> 00:08:00,338 I know. 170 00:08:02,515 --> 00:08:04,093 What do you think they're saying? 171 00:08:04,117 --> 00:08:06,228 What's keeping these two guys apart? 172 00:08:06,252 --> 00:08:08,163 If only we could break their secret code! 173 00:08:08,187 --> 00:08:10,621 Yeah. Again, Spanish. 174 00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:13,736 - Hi, sexy. - Ah! 175 00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:15,993 It's the Verizon Guy! 176 00:08:18,898 --> 00:08:21,777 Hi, Neil. Can I... can I mute you a sec? 177 00:08:21,801 --> 00:08:25,631 Ugh, rescheduling a second date with this guy for years. 178 00:08:25,655 --> 00:08:27,956 Every time I think I'm rid of him, he pops back up 179 00:08:27,980 --> 00:08:29,426 like Geraldo Rivera. 180 00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:33,405 Hey, Neil. 181 00:08:33,429 --> 00:08:35,240 Tonight's on the books, stud. 182 00:08:35,264 --> 00:08:37,159 "Friday night, Will gets Neiled. 183 00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:40,078 Eggplant, eggplant, smiley face." 184 00:08:40,102 --> 00:08:43,148 The smiley face will be yours. 185 00:08:43,172 --> 00:08:46,018 Uh, I... I'm afraid I'm gonna have to cancel again. 186 00:08:46,042 --> 00:08:47,486 No! No, Mama. 187 00:08:52,951 --> 00:08:55,452 - Moms, right? - He knows the servants' 188 00:08:55,476 --> 00:08:57,643 secret code! 189 00:08:58,489 --> 00:09:00,768 That's right, his mom's from Argentina. 190 00:09:00,792 --> 00:09:03,170 It's the one interesting thing about him. 191 00:09:03,194 --> 00:09:05,472 So lover, about tonight? 192 00:09:05,496 --> 00:09:09,109 - I... think tonight will work. - Mm-hmm. 193 00:09:09,133 --> 00:09:11,111 Can you pop by the office? 194 00:09:11,135 --> 00:09:13,013 So you wanna play secretary, huh? 195 00:09:13,037 --> 00:09:14,481 Take a little dick-tation 196 00:09:14,505 --> 00:09:15,916 - from Mr... - Okay, bye. 197 00:09:15,940 --> 00:09:18,100 - Go flirt with someone! - No, Jack. 198 00:09:18,124 --> 00:09:19,234 Let's just go home. 199 00:09:19,258 --> 00:09:20,736 Women are different. We can't just 200 00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:23,438 go up to any rando and say, "Let's have sex." 201 00:09:23,462 --> 00:09:25,714 Trust me, I'm well aware of the subtle and delicate 202 00:09:25,738 --> 00:09:28,676 mating rituals of the heterosessual woman. 203 00:09:32,338 --> 00:09:35,050 - She did that. She likes you. - Oh! 204 00:09:35,074 --> 00:09:36,340 I don't like you. 205 00:09:36,811 --> 00:09:38,878 I mean, I... I don't know if I like you 206 00:09:38,902 --> 00:09:40,329 because I don't know you. 207 00:09:40,353 --> 00:09:42,365 Well, it's my loss. Because you're the most 208 00:09:42,389 --> 00:09:43,933 beautiful woman who's come in here all day. 209 00:09:48,161 --> 00:09:50,031 Just today? 210 00:09:51,364 --> 00:09:54,710 Ahh, the fish has become the bird. 211 00:09:58,872 --> 00:10:00,483 No, mother, I couldn't answer the phone 212 00:10:00,507 --> 00:10:02,368 because I was helping Grace hook up with a waiter. 213 00:10:02,392 --> 00:10:03,419 Jack! 214 00:10:03,443 --> 00:10:05,388 Tell her it was a hot waiter. 215 00:10:05,412 --> 00:10:07,612 And in the ladies' room. 216 00:10:08,233 --> 00:10:09,443 Aren't you impressed now? 217 00:10:09,467 --> 00:10:11,478 I once had sex in the ladies' room 218 00:10:11,502 --> 00:10:13,388 in the Statue of Liberty. 219 00:10:14,672 --> 00:10:16,975 Only woman I've ever been inside of. 220 00:10:18,898 --> 00:10:20,265 No, you're gonna let me speak. 221 00:10:20,289 --> 00:10:21,622 No, you're gonna let me speak, Mother! 222 00:10:21,646 --> 00:10:22,913 James... Jack... 223 00:10:22,937 --> 00:10:25,092 I can't with this right now. 224 00:10:25,116 --> 00:10:27,181 Because he's my boyfriend, Drew. 225 00:10:27,205 --> 00:10:29,450 Deal with it, okay... no, you do not hang up on me. 226 00:10:29,474 --> 00:10:30,951 Do not... Judith! 227 00:10:33,812 --> 00:10:34,978 Are those for me? 228 00:10:35,002 --> 00:10:36,991 Grace, I'm an idiot. I panicked. 229 00:10:37,015 --> 00:10:39,160 I'm just out of a divorce and you live in the building 230 00:10:39,184 --> 00:10:40,728 and none of that means anything 231 00:10:40,752 --> 00:10:44,565 because there is a crazy, beautiful moon out right now 232 00:10:44,589 --> 00:10:48,256 and there is no one that I would rather look at it with. 233 00:10:48,943 --> 00:10:51,249 I'd look at the moon with you. 234 00:10:51,273 --> 00:10:53,341 Wow, you made that so easy. 235 00:10:53,365 --> 00:10:55,009 I mean, this is my problem. 236 00:10:55,033 --> 00:10:57,144 I... I get so worried about things getting complicated. 237 00:10:57,168 --> 00:10:58,702 It's not. There is nothing 238 00:10:58,726 --> 00:11:01,032 complicated about this at all. 239 00:11:03,281 --> 00:11:05,182 - Dad? - Mm. 240 00:11:05,206 --> 00:11:06,843 J.J. 241 00:11:07,962 --> 00:11:10,046 Hi. 242 00:11:20,923 --> 00:11:22,096 I was just coming up to grab 243 00:11:22,120 --> 00:11:23,650 those Knicks tickets, but here you are 244 00:11:23,674 --> 00:11:25,003 - Here we all are. - Yeah. 245 00:11:25,027 --> 00:11:26,997 So this is the woman in the building 246 00:11:27,021 --> 00:11:28,751 - that you've been talking about. - Yep. 247 00:11:28,775 --> 00:11:30,492 And don't you get any ideas, bub. 248 00:11:30,516 --> 00:11:33,851 Oh, that's crazy! 249 00:11:35,078 --> 00:11:36,789 Okay, okay, James, you know what? 250 00:11:36,813 --> 00:11:39,348 Um, why don't you go in there and, um, open 251 00:11:39,372 --> 00:11:41,727 that beautiful bottle of pinot. 252 00:11:41,751 --> 00:11:43,786 Um, I'm going to drill your son... 253 00:11:43,810 --> 00:11:45,977 grill your son... 254 00:11:46,739 --> 00:11:49,068 Grill your son about... about you. 255 00:11:49,092 --> 00:11:51,053 Okay, all right. But don't give too much away. 256 00:11:51,077 --> 00:11:53,294 He better not! 257 00:11:54,063 --> 00:11:56,742 Okay, today was fun, but let's just agree it never happened. 258 00:11:56,766 --> 00:11:58,377 No. I wanna see you again. 259 00:11:58,401 --> 00:12:00,486 - No! No, no. - oh, just have coffee with me. 260 00:12:00,510 --> 00:12:02,848 No, I am... I am seeing your father. 261 00:12:02,872 --> 00:12:04,316 I'll fight him for you. Dad! 262 00:12:04,340 --> 00:12:06,976 What?! Shh! 263 00:12:07,277 --> 00:12:08,387 Okay, okay, okay. 264 00:12:08,411 --> 00:12:10,189 We'll have... we'll have coffee. 265 00:12:10,213 --> 00:12:11,929 And... and maybe a biscotti. 266 00:12:12,581 --> 00:12:14,625 Okay, two biscottis, 'cause I like to dip one 267 00:12:14,649 --> 00:12:16,194 And then eat the other one and... 268 00:12:16,218 --> 00:12:18,096 Okay, but can you... can you please, please 269 00:12:18,120 --> 00:12:19,697 just... just go, just go. 270 00:12:19,721 --> 00:12:21,432 J.J., do you have time for wine? 271 00:12:21,456 --> 00:12:22,867 He doesn't. 272 00:12:22,891 --> 00:12:25,341 - No, I have time. - What? 273 00:12:26,595 --> 00:12:28,556 - Mmm. - Ohh! 274 00:12:33,832 --> 00:12:35,576 Talk to us. What... what are they saying? 275 00:12:35,600 --> 00:12:37,244 Mm, someone's an eager beaver. 276 00:12:37,268 --> 00:12:40,159 To which I say... damn. 277 00:12:42,332 --> 00:12:44,664 Just translate, Univision. 278 00:12:50,902 --> 00:12:52,413 Ooh, new development: 279 00:12:52,437 --> 00:12:54,048 the pastry chef just asked the cook 280 00:12:54,072 --> 00:12:55,339 to Atlantic City for the weekend. 281 00:12:55,363 --> 00:12:57,185 Yes! Yes! And... and what'd he say? 282 00:12:57,209 --> 00:12:58,252 He says he can't. He's got a thing. 283 00:12:58,276 --> 00:12:59,620 - Ah! I knew it! - Ohh. 284 00:12:59,644 --> 00:13:01,088 You see, Cook is stringing him along 285 00:13:01,112 --> 00:13:02,046 'cause he likes him, but he thinks 286 00:13:02,070 --> 00:13:03,135 he can do better. 287 00:13:03,159 --> 00:13:04,842 - You called that one, honey. - Mm-hmm. 288 00:13:04,866 --> 00:13:08,496 - He's a total cook tease. - Yeah. 289 00:13:08,520 --> 00:13:10,264 You know, if this was a real telenovela, 290 00:13:10,288 --> 00:13:12,733 a new love interest would arrive to make Cook jealous. 291 00:13:12,757 --> 00:13:14,068 This show needs a new character. 292 00:13:14,092 --> 00:13:16,230 I can have Shia LaBeouf there in an hour! 293 00:13:16,254 --> 00:13:18,906 Just tap a mirror three times with a razor blade and LaBeouf! 294 00:13:18,930 --> 00:13:20,424 He appears like magic. 295 00:13:24,809 --> 00:13:27,561 Okay, here you go. And I totally understand 296 00:13:27,585 --> 00:13:30,636 if you don't have time to finish this glass of wine. 297 00:13:31,806 --> 00:13:33,851 So tell us about this new lady of yours. 298 00:13:33,875 --> 00:13:36,320 J.J. texted me, said he met an older woman today. 299 00:13:36,344 --> 00:13:37,721 Not that much older. 300 00:13:37,745 --> 00:13:39,888 I'm... I'm guessing. I mean, how would I know? 301 00:13:39,912 --> 00:13:41,325 I don't know. I mean, I literally don't know. 302 00:13:41,349 --> 00:13:43,794 - I'm just taking your word. - Yeah, she's awesome. 303 00:13:43,818 --> 00:13:46,363 She walked into the bar and lit up the place. 304 00:13:46,387 --> 00:13:48,165 That's how I felt when I met grace. 305 00:13:48,189 --> 00:13:50,801 She walked into the laundry room and just lit it up. 306 00:13:52,760 --> 00:13:55,072 - To beginnings. - To beginnings. 307 00:13:55,096 --> 00:13:57,229 And happy endings. 308 00:14:00,031 --> 00:14:03,714 Okay, I think that's enough indoor drinking, uh, for now. 309 00:14:03,738 --> 00:14:07,571 Um, oh! James, we forgot to look at the moon. 310 00:14:07,595 --> 00:14:09,404 - Oh, okay. - Oh, come on, come on. 311 00:14:09,428 --> 00:14:11,873 Okay, you go first, and I will be right there. 312 00:14:11,897 --> 00:14:16,244 And you better run so that you are not late to that game. 313 00:14:16,268 --> 00:14:18,446 Oh, you would be such a great mom. 314 00:14:18,470 --> 00:14:20,148 You really know how to handle my son. 315 00:14:20,172 --> 00:14:22,372 She does. 316 00:14:23,475 --> 00:14:25,053 - When can I see you? - Okay, you gotta go. 317 00:14:25,077 --> 00:14:27,088 - No, first tell me who's BETTER: Me or my dad. 318 00:14:27,112 --> 00:14:28,523 What? Ew, no! 319 00:14:28,547 --> 00:14:29,991 - I will never say that. - I'm not leaving 320 00:14:30,015 --> 00:14:31,109 - until you tell me. - Grace? 321 00:14:31,133 --> 00:14:33,728 Okay, you're better. Uh, James... 322 00:14:33,752 --> 00:14:36,030 - James, how's the moon? - Not as bright as you. 323 00:14:36,054 --> 00:14:38,666 I'm not as bright as you think I am. 324 00:14:38,690 --> 00:14:41,769 J.J., I, uh, I forgot to give you these tickets, buddy. 325 00:14:41,793 --> 00:14:43,204 Uh, who you going to the game with? 326 00:14:43,228 --> 00:14:45,178 Grandpa. I texted him that I was up here. 327 00:14:45,202 --> 00:14:46,724 Oh, and there he is. 328 00:14:46,748 --> 00:14:48,454 Okay. Good-bye. 329 00:14:49,468 --> 00:14:51,901 Well, hello. 330 00:14:55,774 --> 00:14:57,265 Hi, Pop. 331 00:15:09,797 --> 00:15:11,352 Hola. 332 00:15:19,680 --> 00:15:20,868 We speak English. 333 00:15:20,892 --> 00:15:22,536 I did not know that. 334 00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:25,005 What is a tennis instructor doing in the kitchen? 335 00:15:25,029 --> 00:15:26,457 Looking for someone to play with. 336 00:15:28,649 --> 00:15:30,294 What is that music?! 337 00:15:30,318 --> 00:15:32,629 Mrs. Walker asked me to give one member 338 00:15:32,653 --> 00:15:35,132 of the kitchen staff a free lesson. 339 00:15:35,156 --> 00:15:36,467 And I pick you. You've got 340 00:15:36,491 --> 00:15:39,470 the perfect frame for tennis. 341 00:15:39,494 --> 00:15:41,048 And other stuff. 342 00:15:41,662 --> 00:15:43,140 Well, thank you. 343 00:15:43,164 --> 00:15:44,975 - I've never really played. - Oh, it's easy. 344 00:15:44,999 --> 00:15:47,633 Just wrap your fingers around that. 345 00:15:50,087 --> 00:15:52,894 - You feel that? - I do. 346 00:15:53,591 --> 00:15:55,354 Get your hands off him! 347 00:15:56,260 --> 00:15:58,155 Why? 348 00:15:58,179 --> 00:16:00,240 'Cause you have unresolved feelings for him 349 00:16:00,264 --> 00:16:02,042 you've never expressed 'cause you're waiting 350 00:16:02,066 --> 00:16:03,577 for something better to come along 351 00:16:03,601 --> 00:16:04,995 and now you realize he's the one you really want? 352 00:16:05,019 --> 00:16:06,580 Well, basically, yes. 353 00:16:06,604 --> 00:16:08,654 That's a really good guess. 354 00:16:09,857 --> 00:16:11,552 Alejandro... 355 00:16:14,862 --> 00:16:16,459 Oh! 356 00:16:22,453 --> 00:16:24,587 My work here is done. 357 00:16:26,924 --> 00:16:29,453 Grace Adler. Twice in one day. 358 00:16:29,477 --> 00:16:31,271 - How wonderful. - You know each other? 359 00:16:31,295 --> 00:16:35,025 I had him in college. I... he was my professor... 360 00:16:35,049 --> 00:16:37,611 - in college. - I remember when Grace 361 00:16:37,635 --> 00:16:39,112 first walked into my class. 362 00:16:39,136 --> 00:16:41,192 She lit up the room. 363 00:16:42,139 --> 00:16:45,202 - She did. - Oy, gevalt. 364 00:16:45,226 --> 00:16:47,421 Mm, she was a special student. 365 00:16:47,445 --> 00:16:49,456 Actually, she was very special 366 00:16:49,480 --> 00:16:52,292 - because Grace and I... - Oh, my God! 367 00:16:52,316 --> 00:16:54,127 We forgot to look at the moon. 368 00:16:54,151 --> 00:16:55,462 Someone... someone's gotta check on it. 369 00:16:55,486 --> 00:16:57,047 What if something happened to it? 370 00:16:57,071 --> 00:16:58,298 Okay... oh, yeah, so you want me to look for it? 371 00:16:58,322 --> 00:16:59,716 - Please! - Okay, okay. 372 00:16:59,740 --> 00:17:01,051 Would you, please? And J.J., don't be so rude. 373 00:17:01,075 --> 00:17:02,970 Go get your grandfather a drink. 374 00:17:02,994 --> 00:17:04,972 Oh, gosh. Please, please, please, 375 00:17:04,996 --> 00:17:06,773 please don't tell your son and your grandson 376 00:17:06,797 --> 00:17:08,058 about our history. 377 00:17:08,082 --> 00:17:11,979 I am... I'm kinda seeing James right now. 378 00:17:12,003 --> 00:17:15,732 I've been thinking about you all day. 379 00:17:15,756 --> 00:17:18,270 Let's recreate that magic. 380 00:17:19,594 --> 00:17:22,239 I just told you I am seeing your son. 381 00:17:22,263 --> 00:17:24,276 But I'm better, right? 382 00:17:25,600 --> 00:17:27,828 - Really? - When can I see you? 383 00:17:27,852 --> 00:17:29,329 Oh, gosh, I don't know. 384 00:17:29,353 --> 00:17:32,076 Maybe next week for a biscotti. 385 00:17:32,607 --> 00:17:35,252 Two biscottis, maybe. 386 00:17:35,276 --> 00:17:37,471 You know, I think maybe I oversold the moon. 387 00:17:37,495 --> 00:17:39,756 Um, it's a moon. That's it. 388 00:17:39,780 --> 00:17:41,675 Okay, you know what? I wanna make a toast. 389 00:17:41,699 --> 00:17:44,678 To the Knicks, who start on time. 390 00:17:44,702 --> 00:17:47,014 - Mm-hmm. - Right? 391 00:17:47,038 --> 00:17:49,254 - Yeah. - There it is. 392 00:17:50,791 --> 00:17:53,092 - Mmm. - Oh, God. 393 00:17:56,347 --> 00:17:58,048 Okay, J.J., you better get going. 394 00:17:58,072 --> 00:17:59,526 - Yeah. - The only time he wants to 395 00:17:59,550 --> 00:18:01,361 spend time with me is when I'm with a pretty girl. 396 00:18:01,385 --> 00:18:02,362 - Oh. - I think I'm good 397 00:18:02,386 --> 00:18:03,864 with my own pretty girl. 398 00:18:03,888 --> 00:18:06,450 I once had the prettiest girl in the world. 399 00:18:06,474 --> 00:18:08,459 Great, great. So you had 400 00:18:08,483 --> 00:18:10,120 the prettiest girl in the world. 401 00:18:10,144 --> 00:18:11,538 Once again, you win, Dad. 402 00:18:11,562 --> 00:18:13,040 You're the one who made it a competition. 403 00:18:13,064 --> 00:18:14,458 You make everything a competition. 404 00:18:14,482 --> 00:18:15,876 Maybe you didn't have the prettiest girl 405 00:18:15,900 --> 00:18:17,628 in the world I had the prettiest girl. 406 00:18:17,652 --> 00:18:19,796 Dear God, for once in my life, let me win! 407 00:18:19,820 --> 00:18:21,870 I have the prettiest girl in the world! 408 00:18:21,894 --> 00:18:24,885 Oh, you never had the prettiest girl in the world! 409 00:18:24,909 --> 00:18:26,186 - Oh, God... - Stop! No! 410 00:18:26,210 --> 00:18:29,383 I can't stand this anymore! Stop! 411 00:18:30,081 --> 00:18:33,749 I am the prettiest girl in the world! 412 00:18:39,006 --> 00:18:41,318 You are fighting over me. 413 00:18:41,342 --> 00:18:42,986 - What? - All of use? 414 00:18:43,010 --> 00:18:44,565 Grandpa! 415 00:18:45,596 --> 00:18:47,574 All right, here goes. 416 00:18:47,598 --> 00:18:49,376 I slept with you in college 'cause I was 417 00:18:49,400 --> 00:18:50,994 working through a dad issue. 418 00:18:51,018 --> 00:18:52,996 I slept with you today as a rebound 419 00:18:53,020 --> 00:18:54,331 to get over you. 420 00:18:54,355 --> 00:18:56,619 You slept with my son... 421 00:18:57,858 --> 00:18:59,920 and my father? 422 00:18:59,944 --> 00:19:03,090 You really have to put it into context. 423 00:19:03,114 --> 00:19:04,558 You lost, Dad. All right, Grace said 424 00:19:04,582 --> 00:19:06,059 - she'd go out with me. - No, no, she asked me 425 00:19:06,083 --> 00:19:07,511 out next week for coffee. 426 00:19:07,535 --> 00:19:10,091 And who knows what else. Rawr. 427 00:19:10,788 --> 00:19:13,183 - What is wrong with you?! - Okay, okay, 428 00:19:13,207 --> 00:19:14,685 I... I said I would go out with you. 429 00:19:14,709 --> 00:19:16,436 But only so that you wouldn't tell your dad 430 00:19:16,460 --> 00:19:17,771 that I slept with you. 431 00:19:17,795 --> 00:19:19,606 And I said I would go out with you 432 00:19:19,630 --> 00:19:22,359 just so that you wouldn't tell your son and your grandson 433 00:19:22,383 --> 00:19:24,194 that I slept with you. 434 00:19:24,218 --> 00:19:26,780 But in my defense... 435 00:19:26,804 --> 00:19:31,952 I have not meant a single word of what I have said tonight, 436 00:19:31,976 --> 00:19:34,588 except to you, James. 437 00:19:34,612 --> 00:19:37,374 James, I really, really, really like you. 438 00:19:37,398 --> 00:19:39,543 And I really don't see any reason why 439 00:19:39,567 --> 00:19:41,817 this has to be complicated. 440 00:19:44,121 --> 00:19:46,266 And as I'm saying this, I realize that 441 00:19:46,290 --> 00:19:49,386 this will not work and so you tell me what day 442 00:19:49,410 --> 00:19:51,638 you do the laundry and I will work around your schedule. 443 00:19:51,662 --> 00:19:54,141 - Generally, Saturday mornings. - Oh, really? 'Cause that's 444 00:19:54,165 --> 00:19:55,809 - when I like to... okay. - Oh, my God. 445 00:19:55,833 --> 00:19:58,333 - We should go to the game. - Yeah. 446 00:19:58,803 --> 00:20:01,336 - Oh, God. - I'll call you. Rawr. 447 00:20:13,434 --> 00:20:16,740 - I know him, he's... - James' father. 448 00:20:17,605 --> 00:20:21,001 - And that's... - Grandson. 449 00:20:21,025 --> 00:20:23,414 - So you... - Mm-hmm. 450 00:20:25,696 --> 00:20:27,293 Respect. 451 00:20:32,369 --> 00:20:35,098 Ah, honey, you did it! 452 00:20:35,122 --> 00:20:36,600 Oh, it was so much fun! 453 00:20:36,624 --> 00:20:38,985 - Aww. - Hey, maybe working with you 454 00:20:39,009 --> 00:20:42,439 - won't be complete torture. - Right back at you, Wilma. 455 00:20:42,463 --> 00:20:45,192 It's so interesting, Pastry Chef was making 456 00:20:45,216 --> 00:20:47,611 these pirouettes that were just perfect. 457 00:20:47,635 --> 00:20:49,196 Whenever I do them, they're always too thick 458 00:20:49,220 --> 00:20:52,449 and the ratio between ganache and cookie is all wrong 459 00:20:52,473 --> 00:20:53,867 - and they... they... - Hold up, hold up, hold up. 460 00:20:53,891 --> 00:20:56,787 Whoa! Wait a minute. 461 00:20:56,811 --> 00:20:59,539 LMAO, I did not know this was gonna 462 00:20:59,563 --> 00:21:02,659 be a story about gay cookies. 463 00:21:02,683 --> 00:21:06,329 Oh! Okay, so back it up, start at the beginning. 464 00:21:06,353 --> 00:21:08,570 But wait until I leave. 465 00:21:09,940 --> 00:21:11,587 Oh... 466 00:21:12,409 --> 00:21:14,660 Karen, you forgot... 467 00:21:25,942 --> 00:21:31,660 Synced & corrected by -robtor- www.addic7ed.com 468 00:21:32,305 --> 00:21:38,310 -= www.OpenSubtitles.org =- 33712

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