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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,312 --> 00:00:02,044 ADULT SHELDON: In any ecosystem, 2 00:00:02,047 --> 00:00:06,671 you'll find a delicate balance between predator and prey. 3 00:00:06,674 --> 00:00:08,429 Some well-known predators 4 00:00:08,432 --> 00:00:11,468 include Panthera leo, 5 00:00:11,471 --> 00:00:13,138 Ursus arctos, 6 00:00:13,141 --> 00:00:16,362 and star of the 1987 film Predator, 7 00:00:16,364 --> 00:00:18,164 Predator. 8 00:00:18,166 --> 00:00:20,020 Now, examples of prey 9 00:00:20,023 --> 00:00:23,303 include Oryctolagus cuniculus, 10 00:00:23,305 --> 00:00:25,405 Gallus gallus domesticus, 11 00:00:25,407 --> 00:00:28,317 and weighing in at 58 pounds soaking wet, 12 00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:30,343 Diminutive homo novus... 13 00:00:30,345 --> 00:00:32,372 Curiously, a close relative 14 00:00:32,375 --> 00:00:34,914 of Gallus gallus domesticus. 15 00:00:34,916 --> 00:00:36,215 ♪ Two, three, four ♪ 16 00:00:36,217 --> 00:00:38,318 ["FIX ME" BY BLACK FLAG PLAYS] 17 00:00:38,320 --> 00:00:40,987 [KIDS SHOUTING] 18 00:00:40,989 --> 00:00:43,434 ♪ Fix me, fix my head ♪ 19 00:00:43,437 --> 00:00:45,879 ♪ Fix me please, I don't want to be dead... ♪ 20 00:00:46,885 --> 00:00:48,051 LUIS: Cooper. 21 00:00:48,054 --> 00:00:49,462 Your stop. 22 00:00:49,464 --> 00:00:53,098 Would you mind dropping me off closer to my house? 23 00:00:53,101 --> 00:00:55,067 You know I'm not allowed to do that. 24 00:00:55,070 --> 00:00:57,070 What if I did your taxes? 25 00:00:57,072 --> 00:00:58,679 Sorry, kiddo. 26 00:01:02,477 --> 00:01:05,244 I could've gotten you a nice refund. 27 00:01:05,246 --> 00:01:06,779 ADULT SHELDON: The perilous journey 28 00:01:06,781 --> 00:01:08,781 from the bus stop to my front door 29 00:01:08,783 --> 00:01:11,451 was 97.5 meters. 30 00:01:11,453 --> 00:01:14,434 FYI, insisting on using the metric system 31 00:01:14,437 --> 00:01:17,991 in East Texas is another reason I was hunted by predators. 32 00:01:30,572 --> 00:01:32,772 ♪ ♪ 33 00:01:49,190 --> 00:01:52,195 [PANTING] Homo novus needs a Yoo-hoo. 34 00:01:53,795 --> 00:01:56,763 ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪ 35 00:01:56,765 --> 00:01:59,565 ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪ 36 00:01:59,567 --> 00:02:02,168 ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪ 37 00:02:02,170 --> 00:02:05,075 ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪ 38 00:02:05,078 --> 00:02:11,781 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.Addic7ed.com -- 39 00:02:17,385 --> 00:02:18,684 Jiu-jitsu? 40 00:02:18,686 --> 00:02:21,587 I've decided to learn self-defense. 41 00:02:21,589 --> 00:02:23,387 - Why? - I'm quite small, 42 00:02:23,390 --> 00:02:25,658 and will be for several years, 43 00:02:25,660 --> 00:02:27,660 maybe even more if I'm a late bloomer. 44 00:02:27,662 --> 00:02:30,229 Your dad's big, maybe you'll take after him. 45 00:02:30,231 --> 00:02:31,597 We both like my mom. 46 00:02:31,599 --> 00:02:33,933 I think that's where the similarities end. 47 00:02:33,935 --> 00:02:35,635 You know, one of the books mentioned 48 00:02:35,637 --> 00:02:37,637 a Vietnamese martial art. 49 00:02:37,639 --> 00:02:39,839 Vovinam. I'm a blue belt. 50 00:02:39,841 --> 00:02:41,974 - Wow. - Don't be impressed. 51 00:02:41,976 --> 00:02:44,143 It's what you get when your mom buys the uniform. 52 00:02:44,145 --> 00:02:45,912 Do you remember any of it? 53 00:02:45,914 --> 00:02:48,593 I don't even know where the belt is. 54 00:02:51,686 --> 00:02:52,852 The book says jiu-jitsu 55 00:02:52,854 --> 00:02:54,687 is based on using your attacker's 56 00:02:54,689 --> 00:02:56,028 momentum against them. 57 00:02:56,031 --> 00:02:58,791 It's just physics. Come at me. 58 00:02:58,793 --> 00:03:00,660 Like, run at you? 59 00:03:00,662 --> 00:03:03,550 Well, I'm new to this, so maybe just walk quickly. 60 00:03:03,553 --> 00:03:05,114 And what happens when I get to you? 61 00:03:05,117 --> 00:03:07,433 I'll use your inertia to take you down. 62 00:03:07,435 --> 00:03:08,835 Okay. 63 00:03:08,837 --> 00:03:10,236 ♪ Hit it ♪ 64 00:03:10,238 --> 00:03:12,215 ♪ It takes two to make a thing go right ♪ 65 00:03:12,218 --> 00:03:14,373 [GRUNTING] 66 00:03:14,375 --> 00:03:16,976 And when does inertia take me down? 67 00:03:16,978 --> 00:03:18,937 [STRAINING]: Any second. 68 00:03:18,940 --> 00:03:21,140 ♪ I got an idea that I wanna share ♪ 69 00:03:21,143 --> 00:03:23,644 ♪ You don't like it, so what? I don't care... ♪ 70 00:03:23,647 --> 00:03:25,613 I don't understand. 71 00:03:25,616 --> 00:03:27,586 I'm using physics. 72 00:03:27,589 --> 00:03:28,945 [GRUNTING] 73 00:03:28,948 --> 00:03:31,125 ♪ All of my followers 'cause all I want is respect... ♪ 74 00:03:31,128 --> 00:03:34,794 This leg lock is called an Outside Ashi Garami. 75 00:03:34,796 --> 00:03:36,162 What happens next? 76 00:03:36,164 --> 00:03:38,695 That depends, is this your foot or mine? 77 00:03:38,698 --> 00:03:40,582 ♪ It takes two to make it outta sight. ♪ 78 00:03:40,585 --> 00:03:42,468 ♪ ♪ 79 00:03:42,470 --> 00:03:45,296 LUIS: Cooper. Your stop. 80 00:04:00,889 --> 00:04:02,555 [PANTING] 81 00:04:07,729 --> 00:04:09,162 Ahh. 82 00:04:10,798 --> 00:04:12,976 I bowled a new high score last night. 83 00:04:12,979 --> 00:04:14,164 Nice. 84 00:04:14,167 --> 00:04:17,375 - I got two turkeys. - What's a turkey? 85 00:04:17,378 --> 00:04:19,005 It's three strikes in a row. 86 00:04:19,007 --> 00:04:20,895 Why do they call it a turkey? 87 00:04:20,898 --> 00:04:24,677 Well, when they first invented bowling, 88 00:04:24,679 --> 00:04:28,075 they used to just throw frozen turkeys at the pins. 89 00:04:28,078 --> 00:04:30,489 Eventually, they switched to balls 90 00:04:30,492 --> 00:04:33,019 to cut down on the smell. 91 00:04:33,021 --> 00:04:34,654 Why you lying to her? 92 00:04:34,656 --> 00:04:37,089 I find it keeps my mind sharp. [CHUCKLES] 93 00:04:37,091 --> 00:04:39,225 Sheldon, breakfast! 94 00:04:39,227 --> 00:04:40,893 SHELDON: Be right there! 95 00:04:44,732 --> 00:04:46,866 MARY: Sheldon! 96 00:04:46,868 --> 00:04:49,226 Coming! 97 00:04:56,911 --> 00:04:58,177 [RUSTLING] 98 00:05:01,683 --> 00:05:03,216 Hello. 99 00:05:03,218 --> 00:05:04,793 MARY: Shelly, you all right? 100 00:05:04,796 --> 00:05:06,681 Yes. I must be a little sore 101 00:05:06,684 --> 00:05:09,388 from doing jiu-jitsu with Tam yesterday. 102 00:05:09,391 --> 00:05:11,207 Why were you doing jiu-jitsu? 103 00:05:11,210 --> 00:05:14,193 We're boys. Roughhousing is what we do. 104 00:05:15,930 --> 00:05:17,563 [POPPING] 105 00:05:19,434 --> 00:05:22,335 - What was that? - What was what? 106 00:05:22,337 --> 00:05:23,636 That sound. 107 00:05:23,638 --> 00:05:25,273 What sound? 108 00:05:25,276 --> 00:05:26,812 [POPPING] 109 00:05:31,031 --> 00:05:32,445 What's all this? 110 00:05:32,447 --> 00:05:35,081 An extra layer of protection. 111 00:05:35,083 --> 00:05:36,656 Protection from what? 112 00:05:36,659 --> 00:05:39,417 Sweetie, is someone bothering you? 113 00:05:39,420 --> 00:05:42,288 - Yes. - Who is it? 114 00:05:42,290 --> 00:05:44,059 I'd rather not talk about it. 115 00:05:44,062 --> 00:05:45,825 No, I want a name right now. 116 00:05:45,827 --> 00:05:47,039 Mary. 117 00:05:47,042 --> 00:05:48,327 Have you been hurting him? 118 00:05:48,329 --> 00:05:50,296 Only with my words. 119 00:05:50,298 --> 00:05:51,831 Tell me who it is, Shelly. 120 00:05:51,833 --> 00:05:53,065 Mary, slow down. 121 00:05:53,067 --> 00:05:54,734 Don't tell me to slow down. 122 00:05:54,736 --> 00:05:56,736 - Someone is bullying him. - Okay. 123 00:05:56,738 --> 00:05:58,281 Okay. 124 00:05:58,284 --> 00:06:00,751 Sheldon, you can't go to school wearing all that. 125 00:06:00,754 --> 00:06:02,195 Go to your room and take it off. 126 00:06:02,198 --> 00:06:03,530 Yes, sir. 127 00:06:03,533 --> 00:06:06,134 [RUSTLING, POPPING] 128 00:06:06,137 --> 00:06:07,680 You go with him. 129 00:06:07,683 --> 00:06:09,227 But my cereal's gonna get soggy. 130 00:06:09,230 --> 00:06:10,950 - Go. - [SIGHS] 131 00:06:10,952 --> 00:06:12,890 I'd like one nice morning. 132 00:06:15,089 --> 00:06:16,859 Why aren't you more upset about this? 133 00:06:16,862 --> 00:06:19,520 I am. I just think we should proceed with caution. 134 00:06:19,523 --> 00:06:22,340 - Someone is hurting our son. - I understand. 135 00:06:22,343 --> 00:06:24,330 But handling bullies is tricky. It... 136 00:06:24,332 --> 00:06:26,465 It's easy to make things worse. 137 00:06:26,467 --> 00:06:28,301 And what makes you the expert? 138 00:06:28,303 --> 00:06:31,237 Honey, I was a bully. 139 00:06:31,239 --> 00:06:32,538 MEEMAW: He's right. 140 00:06:32,540 --> 00:06:34,874 You get involved in this in the wrong way, 141 00:06:34,876 --> 00:06:37,810 and they'll take it out on Sheldon. 142 00:06:37,812 --> 00:06:40,562 Well, I'm sorry, but I can't just stand by. 143 00:06:47,288 --> 00:06:49,422 Georgie, I need to talk to you, and wake up, 144 00:06:49,424 --> 00:06:50,990 you're gonna be late. 145 00:06:50,992 --> 00:06:54,293 Got it covered. I slept in my clothes. 146 00:06:54,295 --> 00:06:57,433 Oh, Lord. Look, somebody has been picking on your brother. 147 00:06:57,436 --> 00:06:58,668 You know anything about it? 148 00:06:58,671 --> 00:06:59,778 No. 149 00:06:59,781 --> 00:07:02,335 You better not be covering for anybody. 150 00:07:02,337 --> 00:07:04,236 I'm not. Most kids at school ignore him, 151 00:07:04,238 --> 00:07:05,804 and the girls all think he's cute. 152 00:07:05,807 --> 00:07:07,273 It's kind of annoying. 153 00:07:07,275 --> 00:07:09,675 Well, I need you to look after him. 154 00:07:09,677 --> 00:07:10,687 Why? 155 00:07:10,690 --> 00:07:13,546 Because I'm your mother, and I'm asking you nicely. 156 00:07:13,548 --> 00:07:15,047 What if I don't want to? 157 00:07:15,049 --> 00:07:17,843 I don't care, you're doing it. 158 00:07:19,854 --> 00:07:21,620 How was that nice? 159 00:07:21,622 --> 00:07:24,390 So there I was flying above the city, 160 00:07:24,392 --> 00:07:26,759 but when I woke up, I couldn't fly. 161 00:07:26,761 --> 00:07:29,195 That's like the dream you had where you were dating Madonna, 162 00:07:29,197 --> 00:07:31,161 but when you woke up, you weren't. 163 00:07:31,164 --> 00:07:32,365 Exactly. 164 00:07:32,367 --> 00:07:34,667 You ever have the ones where your teeth are falling out? 165 00:07:34,669 --> 00:07:37,737 Better my teeth than my hair, but... 166 00:07:37,739 --> 00:07:40,606 - Sheldon? - Over here. 167 00:07:40,608 --> 00:07:43,075 - What are you doing? - Hiding. 168 00:07:43,077 --> 00:07:44,310 From who? 169 00:07:46,995 --> 00:07:49,020 Is Billy the one giving you trouble? 170 00:07:49,023 --> 00:07:50,116 No. 171 00:07:50,118 --> 00:07:52,218 His dad? 172 00:07:52,220 --> 00:07:53,926 No... 173 00:07:53,929 --> 00:07:56,456 ♪ ♪ 174 00:07:56,459 --> 00:07:57,732 No. 175 00:07:59,761 --> 00:08:01,627 She's a demon. 176 00:08:05,922 --> 00:08:07,637 The little Sparks girl? 177 00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:10,068 You're kidding. She seems so sweet. 178 00:08:10,071 --> 00:08:12,805 He says she slaps him around, takes his lunch money. 179 00:08:12,808 --> 00:08:15,296 She even put a tadpole down his shirt. 180 00:08:15,298 --> 00:08:18,621 Poor kid, he tucks in those shirts. 181 00:08:28,377 --> 00:08:30,978 - She looks harmless. - She's cute. 182 00:08:30,980 --> 00:08:33,280 So she probably gets away with stuff. 183 00:08:33,282 --> 00:08:34,961 I'm like that. 184 00:08:36,500 --> 00:08:38,764 I wonder if stray cats poop in that sandbox. 185 00:08:38,767 --> 00:08:39,966 MARY: George. 186 00:08:42,358 --> 00:08:44,344 You need to talk to her parents. 187 00:08:44,347 --> 00:08:45,746 Me? Why me? 188 00:08:45,749 --> 00:08:48,863 Because you're more intimidating than me. 189 00:08:48,865 --> 00:08:50,750 That's rich. 190 00:09:00,977 --> 00:09:02,276 Hey, Billy. 191 00:09:02,278 --> 00:09:04,243 Hello, Missy's dad. 192 00:09:04,246 --> 00:09:07,380 - Is your father home? - Yes. 193 00:09:07,383 --> 00:09:09,950 Could you get him for me? 194 00:09:09,952 --> 00:09:11,563 Happy to. 195 00:09:11,566 --> 00:09:13,820 Dad, it's Missy's dad! 196 00:09:13,823 --> 00:09:16,274 He's also Sheldon's dad! 197 00:09:16,277 --> 00:09:17,791 HERSCHEL: Well, howdy, neighbor. 198 00:09:17,793 --> 00:09:18,836 Hey, Herschel. 199 00:09:18,839 --> 00:09:20,528 What brings you by? Chickens too loud? 200 00:09:20,530 --> 00:09:22,880 - Nah, they been fine. - Good, good. 201 00:09:22,883 --> 00:09:24,765 Fried up the noisy one last week. 202 00:09:24,767 --> 00:09:26,919 That shut him up. Anyway, how can I help? 203 00:09:26,922 --> 00:09:28,536 Uh, well... 204 00:09:28,538 --> 00:09:31,505 It's come to my attention that, uh... 205 00:09:31,507 --> 00:09:34,408 Sheldon's run into a bit of trouble with your daughter. 206 00:09:34,410 --> 00:09:35,943 What kind of trouble? 207 00:09:35,945 --> 00:09:38,913 He says she been beating on him. 208 00:09:38,915 --> 00:09:42,082 - My Bobbi? - Yeah. 209 00:09:42,084 --> 00:09:43,851 This one? The six-year-old? 210 00:09:45,288 --> 00:09:46,587 Bobbi, get over here! 211 00:09:46,589 --> 00:09:49,957 You realize I've taken dumps bigger than this kid. 212 00:09:49,959 --> 00:09:52,391 - Hi, Daddy. - Hey, babydoll, uh, 213 00:09:52,394 --> 00:09:56,024 Mr. Cooper says that you've been picking on Sheldon. 214 00:09:56,027 --> 00:09:59,099 - Now, is that true? - No, Daddy. 215 00:09:59,101 --> 00:10:00,634 Are you sure? 216 00:10:00,636 --> 00:10:03,537 Okay, go wash up for dinner. 217 00:10:03,539 --> 00:10:06,305 I don't know what to tell you, George. 218 00:10:06,308 --> 00:10:07,740 I mean, is it, is it possible 219 00:10:07,743 --> 00:10:09,565 your son has a little crush on her? 220 00:10:09,568 --> 00:10:11,568 Oh, I don't think he's wired that way. 221 00:10:11,571 --> 00:10:13,958 Oh, are you saying that he's a... 222 00:10:13,961 --> 00:10:16,984 No, no, I'm saying he's a bookworm. [CHUCKLES] 223 00:10:16,986 --> 00:10:20,220 Unless she's math or a dictionary, he ain't interested. 224 00:10:20,222 --> 00:10:21,822 - Mm. - Yeah. 225 00:10:21,824 --> 00:10:24,391 Thanks for hearin' me out. 226 00:10:24,393 --> 00:10:26,805 Your wife sent you over here, didn't she? 227 00:10:26,808 --> 00:10:28,630 - I don't want to talk about it. - [CHUCKLES] 228 00:10:28,633 --> 00:10:29,829 I bet she did! 229 00:10:29,832 --> 00:10:31,131 Not talkin' about it! 230 00:10:31,133 --> 00:10:32,633 Tell her I said hi! 231 00:10:32,635 --> 00:10:34,468 [CHUCKLES] 232 00:10:36,782 --> 00:10:38,138 How'd it go? 233 00:10:38,140 --> 00:10:40,507 Uh, good. Yeah. 234 00:10:40,509 --> 00:10:41,977 I handled it. 235 00:10:41,980 --> 00:10:43,446 Oh, thank the Lord. 236 00:10:43,449 --> 00:10:45,278 Yeah. Me and the Lord. 237 00:10:45,281 --> 00:10:46,758 Team effort. 238 00:10:50,486 --> 00:10:52,686 [WHIRRING] 239 00:11:02,598 --> 00:11:04,732 Hello, Bobbi. 240 00:11:04,734 --> 00:11:07,301 You told on me. 241 00:11:07,303 --> 00:11:09,336 Well, actually, my brother 242 00:11:09,338 --> 00:11:12,773 figured it out, so, technically, I would argue that I didn't. 243 00:11:12,775 --> 00:11:14,875 Doesn't matter. 244 00:11:14,877 --> 00:11:17,444 Uh, I should let you know, 245 00:11:17,446 --> 00:11:19,146 I've read a book on jiu-jitsu. 246 00:11:19,148 --> 00:11:22,383 And I'm prepared to throw it at you. 247 00:11:25,094 --> 00:11:27,521 [SCREAMING] 248 00:11:27,523 --> 00:11:29,323 Shelly, it's just Bactine. 249 00:11:30,159 --> 00:11:31,325 Aah! 250 00:11:31,327 --> 00:11:33,883 I didn't even put it on you yet. 251 00:11:33,886 --> 00:11:35,663 [SHUSHING SOFTLY] 252 00:11:35,665 --> 00:11:37,998 You want to tell me what happened? 253 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:40,802 Bobbi Sparks came into the garage... 254 00:11:40,805 --> 00:11:42,375 And she attacked you? 255 00:11:42,378 --> 00:11:45,271 Not exactly. I tried to use jiu-jitsu on her, 256 00:11:45,274 --> 00:11:46,807 but I tripped and fell. 257 00:11:46,809 --> 00:11:50,634 Aw, baby. I'm so sorry you're havin' to deal with this. 258 00:11:50,637 --> 00:11:51,826 It's okay. 259 00:11:51,829 --> 00:11:54,372 German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche said, 260 00:11:54,375 --> 00:11:57,351 "That which does not kill us makes us stronger." 261 00:11:57,353 --> 00:11:59,469 And do you feel stronger? 262 00:12:00,489 --> 00:12:02,222 No. 263 00:12:03,426 --> 00:12:04,858 How are the knees? 264 00:12:04,860 --> 00:12:06,427 Better, thank you. 265 00:12:06,429 --> 00:12:08,162 Good. 266 00:12:08,164 --> 00:12:10,919 And regarding this jiu-jitsu stuff, you should know 267 00:12:10,922 --> 00:12:13,454 that a man's not supposed to raise his hand to a woman. 268 00:12:13,457 --> 00:12:16,086 Oh, I won't. I don't want to hurt myself again. 269 00:12:19,537 --> 00:12:23,005 Did you ever have a bully when you were growing up? 270 00:12:23,008 --> 00:12:24,899 Have you met your grandma? 271 00:12:26,982 --> 00:12:29,483 I thought you said you handled it next door. 272 00:12:29,485 --> 00:12:31,250 I did say that. 273 00:12:33,571 --> 00:12:34,688 Where you goin'? 274 00:12:34,690 --> 00:12:36,454 To handle it. 275 00:12:36,457 --> 00:12:38,759 [QUIETLY]: Should've been you in the first place. 276 00:12:38,761 --> 00:12:39,993 What? 277 00:12:39,996 --> 00:12:41,161 Good luck! 278 00:12:41,163 --> 00:12:43,697 [DOOR SHUTS] 279 00:12:43,699 --> 00:12:46,967 Way to go, Scooby! That's my newshound! 280 00:12:47,951 --> 00:12:50,685 Missy, I could really use your help. 281 00:12:50,688 --> 00:12:51,772 With what? 282 00:12:51,774 --> 00:12:54,241 I'm being bullied by Bobbi Sparks. 283 00:12:54,243 --> 00:12:55,909 Hilarious. Go on. 284 00:12:55,911 --> 00:12:57,144 Madame Doo! 285 00:12:57,146 --> 00:12:58,679 That's me! 286 00:12:58,681 --> 00:13:02,451 Mom says a man should never raise his hand to a woman. 287 00:13:02,454 --> 00:13:04,974 But I believe I've found a loophole. 288 00:13:04,977 --> 00:13:07,020 You're a woman, so you're allowed to hit her 289 00:13:07,022 --> 00:13:08,288 as much as you want. 290 00:13:08,290 --> 00:13:09,758 Why would I do that? 291 00:13:09,761 --> 00:13:11,225 Because I'm willing to pay you. 292 00:13:11,227 --> 00:13:12,292 How much? 293 00:13:12,295 --> 00:13:14,451 My life savings, four dollars. 294 00:13:14,454 --> 00:13:16,169 That's a good start. 295 00:13:16,172 --> 00:13:18,665 Now, let's talk TV privileges. 296 00:13:18,667 --> 00:13:19,933 What do you want? 297 00:13:19,935 --> 00:13:22,569 Complete control every afternoon for two months. 298 00:13:22,571 --> 00:13:24,772 That's when Professor Proton is on. 299 00:13:24,774 --> 00:13:26,977 I know. Sucks for you. 300 00:13:28,310 --> 00:13:29,743 [SIGHS] 301 00:13:33,649 --> 00:13:36,150 I'm on fire! 302 00:13:36,152 --> 00:13:37,985 [LAUGHS] 303 00:13:37,987 --> 00:13:39,353 Hello, Brenda. 304 00:13:39,355 --> 00:13:41,021 Oh, hey, Mary. 305 00:13:41,023 --> 00:13:42,055 How many lanes you need? 306 00:13:42,057 --> 00:13:44,424 Actually, I'm here to talk to you. 307 00:13:44,426 --> 00:13:47,099 Seems that our kids are havin' a little problem. 308 00:13:47,102 --> 00:13:48,996 Yeah. Herschel told me. 309 00:13:48,998 --> 00:13:50,964 Oh, good, good. 310 00:13:50,966 --> 00:13:53,474 So, I was wondering what you're plannin' to do about it, 311 00:13:53,477 --> 00:13:56,044 'cause the situation doesn't seem to be gettin' any better. 312 00:13:56,047 --> 00:13:57,716 Well, if you haven't noticed, 313 00:13:57,719 --> 00:13:59,439 I'm at work right now. 314 00:13:59,441 --> 00:14:01,375 I see that. 315 00:14:01,377 --> 00:14:02,711 But you understand 316 00:14:02,714 --> 00:14:05,012 that your daughter's being abusive to my son. 317 00:14:05,014 --> 00:14:08,382 Well, maybe your son needs to grow a pair. 318 00:14:08,384 --> 00:14:10,317 And in due time, he will. 319 00:14:10,319 --> 00:14:11,985 But right now, I expect you 320 00:14:11,987 --> 00:14:14,154 to teach your children how to behave. 321 00:14:15,887 --> 00:14:18,287 Connie Tucker to the front desk, please. 322 00:14:18,290 --> 00:14:20,027 Connie Tucker. 323 00:14:20,029 --> 00:14:21,562 Why are you calling her? 324 00:14:21,564 --> 00:14:23,794 You say my daughter's harassing your son. 325 00:14:23,797 --> 00:14:26,366 Well, her daughter's harassing me. 326 00:14:26,368 --> 00:14:28,302 Hey, Mary. 327 00:14:28,304 --> 00:14:30,470 - What are you doin' here? - Well, 328 00:14:30,472 --> 00:14:33,340 I was hopin' to have a rational conversation about Shelly, 329 00:14:33,342 --> 00:14:35,475 but there's only one person being rational. 330 00:14:35,478 --> 00:14:37,177 [GRUNTS] Uh, and it ain't you. 331 00:14:37,180 --> 00:14:39,279 Could you excuse us for just a minute? 332 00:14:42,751 --> 00:14:44,551 Do you understand that you are in the place 333 00:14:44,553 --> 00:14:46,753 where I socialize three to four days a week? 334 00:14:46,755 --> 00:14:49,156 So you care more about bowling than your grandson? 335 00:14:49,158 --> 00:14:50,490 Of course not. I'm just saying 336 00:14:50,493 --> 00:14:52,259 maybe there's a better way to go about it. 337 00:14:52,261 --> 00:14:54,661 Now, I'm warnin' you, Brenda is one mean... 338 00:14:54,663 --> 00:14:56,396 I know you don't like bad language, 339 00:14:56,398 --> 00:14:59,066 but we are in a bowling alley... One mean bitch. 340 00:14:59,068 --> 00:15:01,576 Well, I can be mean, too. 341 00:15:01,579 --> 00:15:04,271 Okay, you listen to me. You get your kid 342 00:15:04,273 --> 00:15:05,405 in line or I... 343 00:15:05,407 --> 00:15:07,607 What are you doing? 344 00:15:07,610 --> 00:15:08,642 Get out of here. 345 00:15:08,644 --> 00:15:10,277 This is my place of business. 346 00:15:11,547 --> 00:15:13,881 And now I see where your daughter gets it. 347 00:15:13,883 --> 00:15:14,899 BRENDA: You know what? 348 00:15:14,902 --> 00:15:16,701 I have been nothin' but nice 349 00:15:16,704 --> 00:15:18,919 to you and your family since the day y'all moved in, 350 00:15:18,921 --> 00:15:20,240 and I'm over it. 351 00:15:20,243 --> 00:15:21,755 Watching you walk around all holier 352 00:15:21,757 --> 00:15:23,131 than thou, like you're better 353 00:15:23,134 --> 00:15:24,271 than everyone else. 354 00:15:24,274 --> 00:15:25,359 Well, guess what, 355 00:15:25,361 --> 00:15:26,719 you're not. 356 00:15:28,564 --> 00:15:31,102 I'm gonna pray for you. 357 00:15:34,329 --> 00:15:37,604 She says that to me all the time. 358 00:15:37,607 --> 00:15:39,860 I'm not even sure she does it. 359 00:15:48,202 --> 00:15:49,468 How'd it go? 360 00:15:49,471 --> 00:15:51,562 I don't want to talk about it. 361 00:15:51,565 --> 00:15:53,631 [SNIFFS] Is that pine? 362 00:15:53,633 --> 00:15:55,266 We're not talkin' about it. 363 00:15:55,268 --> 00:15:57,435 - [DOORBELL RINGS] - And you get that! 364 00:16:02,974 --> 00:16:04,140 Herschel. 365 00:16:04,143 --> 00:16:05,175 Hey, George. 366 00:16:05,178 --> 00:16:06,768 It has come to my attention 367 00:16:06,771 --> 00:16:09,447 that your wife went to speak with my wife 368 00:16:09,449 --> 00:16:11,082 at her place of work, 369 00:16:11,084 --> 00:16:12,984 - and, uh... - She send you over here? 370 00:16:12,986 --> 00:16:16,187 Uh, the-the important thing is that I'm here to tell you 371 00:16:16,189 --> 00:16:18,990 that, uh, Mary's behavior was inappropriate. 372 00:16:18,992 --> 00:16:20,725 You know, it's interesting. 373 00:16:20,727 --> 00:16:22,660 When I came to your house, you were laughin', 374 00:16:22,662 --> 00:16:23,732 and... 375 00:16:23,735 --> 00:16:25,296 now you're all serious. 376 00:16:25,298 --> 00:16:26,765 Why is that? 377 00:16:26,767 --> 00:16:28,733 What do you say we go talk about this 378 00:16:28,735 --> 00:16:30,535 somewhere a little more comfortable? 379 00:16:30,537 --> 00:16:32,303 MARY [SHARPLY]: Who's at the door? 380 00:16:37,644 --> 00:16:39,844 [CHICKENS CLUCKING] 381 00:16:41,515 --> 00:16:44,015 Make yourself at home. 382 00:16:44,017 --> 00:16:45,116 Oh, boy. 383 00:16:45,118 --> 00:16:46,451 You hang out in here? 384 00:16:46,453 --> 00:16:47,552 Sure. 385 00:16:47,554 --> 00:16:48,820 Once you get used to the smell, 386 00:16:48,822 --> 00:16:50,661 it's not so bad. [CHUCKLES] 387 00:16:50,664 --> 00:16:52,236 I coach a high school football team. 388 00:16:52,239 --> 00:16:53,479 This smells like petunias. 389 00:16:53,482 --> 00:16:55,026 [LAUGHS] I like to... 390 00:16:55,028 --> 00:16:57,474 take a break from the family and... 391 00:16:57,477 --> 00:17:00,298 come out here and watch the games. 392 00:17:00,300 --> 00:17:02,000 - Ooh! - [CHUCKLES] 393 00:17:02,002 --> 00:17:03,322 [MUSIC PLAYING] 394 00:17:03,325 --> 00:17:05,203 Your wife don't mind? 395 00:17:05,205 --> 00:17:06,337 She don't know. 396 00:17:06,339 --> 00:17:07,839 She's scared to death of chickens. 397 00:17:07,841 --> 00:17:09,674 - Is that right? - Once I found out, 398 00:17:09,676 --> 00:17:12,177 buildin' this coop was a no-brainer. 399 00:17:12,179 --> 00:17:14,112 [LAUGHING] 400 00:17:14,114 --> 00:17:16,443 ♪ I sure did love... ♪ 401 00:17:20,720 --> 00:17:22,387 You were gone so long. 402 00:17:22,389 --> 00:17:23,755 How did it go? 403 00:17:23,757 --> 00:17:25,466 Well... 404 00:17:25,469 --> 00:17:27,358 [ENGLISH ACCENT]: One lump or two? 405 00:17:27,360 --> 00:17:29,761 Two, please. 406 00:17:29,763 --> 00:17:31,429 Billy? 407 00:17:31,431 --> 00:17:34,099 Why would I want lumpy tea? 408 00:17:34,101 --> 00:17:35,533 Isn't he pretty? 409 00:17:35,535 --> 00:17:36,701 Very pretty. 410 00:17:36,703 --> 00:17:38,970 I feel pretty. 411 00:17:38,972 --> 00:17:43,308 ♪ Girl, you know it's true ♪ 412 00:17:43,310 --> 00:17:45,376 ♪ My love... ♪ 413 00:17:45,378 --> 00:17:47,245 I handled it. 414 00:17:47,247 --> 00:17:49,314 Thank you so much. 415 00:17:49,316 --> 00:17:51,028 We're family. It's what we do. 416 00:17:52,752 --> 00:17:55,854 [HERSCHEL AND GEORGE SR. CHUCKLING] 417 00:17:55,856 --> 00:17:58,523 Listen, I'm sorry my wife went down to the bowling alley. 418 00:17:58,525 --> 00:18:01,536 Please, I'm sorry Brenda made me come to your door. 419 00:18:01,539 --> 00:18:02,672 I'm not. 420 00:18:02,675 --> 00:18:05,063 This is the most fun I've had all week. 421 00:18:05,065 --> 00:18:08,263 I-I feel bad about the whole thing with the kids. 422 00:18:08,266 --> 00:18:10,167 Hey, it happens. 423 00:18:10,170 --> 00:18:12,904 I know, but Bobbi shouldn't be beatin' on Sheldon like that. 424 00:18:12,906 --> 00:18:14,643 - It's not okay. - What's not okay 425 00:18:14,646 --> 00:18:16,941 is Sheldon gettin' beat up by a little girl. 426 00:18:16,943 --> 00:18:18,409 Well... 427 00:18:18,411 --> 00:18:19,711 Yeah. 428 00:18:19,713 --> 00:18:21,546 [BOTH CHUCKLING] 429 00:18:21,548 --> 00:18:23,540 Look, I'll talk to Bobbi. 430 00:18:23,543 --> 00:18:25,643 I don't know if it'll help, but I'll try. 431 00:18:25,646 --> 00:18:27,952 - Hey, you're a good man. - Mm. 432 00:18:27,954 --> 00:18:30,421 Yeah, I-I should be headin' back. 433 00:18:30,423 --> 00:18:31,755 Mm. 434 00:18:31,758 --> 00:18:34,425 All right, well, look, come on by anytime. 435 00:18:34,427 --> 00:18:35,994 Yeah. 436 00:18:35,996 --> 00:18:38,697 You know, we should obably get our stories straight 437 00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:40,732 before we talk to our respective... 438 00:18:40,734 --> 00:18:42,435 - mates. - Sure. 439 00:18:42,438 --> 00:18:44,269 What do you want to say? 440 00:18:44,271 --> 00:18:45,937 How 'bout this? 441 00:18:45,939 --> 00:18:47,939 We had words, 442 00:18:47,941 --> 00:18:49,674 it almost got ugly, 443 00:18:49,676 --> 00:18:51,142 but we came to an understanding. 444 00:18:51,144 --> 00:18:52,255 - I like that. - Yeah. 445 00:18:52,258 --> 00:18:53,558 You want to take a swing at me? 446 00:18:53,561 --> 00:18:54,626 Make it look real? 447 00:18:54,629 --> 00:18:58,115 I have a freakishly high tolerance for pain. 448 00:18:58,118 --> 00:19:00,411 No, no. But you're sweet for offering. 449 00:19:00,414 --> 00:19:03,081 - You have a good night. - You, too, pal. [CHUCKLES] 450 00:19:03,084 --> 00:19:04,388 BRENDA: Herschel! 451 00:19:04,391 --> 00:19:06,244 Where the hell are you?! 452 00:19:06,247 --> 00:19:07,559 Shh. 453 00:19:07,561 --> 00:19:10,128 [QUIETLY]: I built a hidey-hole under here, 454 00:19:10,130 --> 00:19:13,398 but there's only room for one of us. 455 00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:15,767 Where is that fat dumb-ass? 456 00:19:15,769 --> 00:19:19,571 Believe it or not, that means I'm gettin' lucky tonight. 457 00:19:19,573 --> 00:19:22,106 Y'all have an odd relationship. 458 00:19:22,108 --> 00:19:24,842 Love is a mysterious thing. 459 00:19:24,844 --> 00:19:26,614 BRENDA: Herschel! 460 00:19:30,952 --> 00:19:33,851 ADULT SHELDON: Existing in a world of predators isn't easy, 461 00:19:33,854 --> 00:19:37,225 but we prey have developed several natural defenses 462 00:19:37,228 --> 00:19:38,494 to help us survive. 463 00:19:38,497 --> 00:19:40,024 There's playing dead, 464 00:19:40,027 --> 00:19:42,480 - warning calls, camouflage... - [BICYCLE BELL RINGS] 465 00:19:42,483 --> 00:19:44,396 ♪ ♪ 466 00:19:44,398 --> 00:19:47,299 And, last but certainly not least, 467 00:19:47,301 --> 00:19:48,967 good old-fashioned running away. 468 00:19:48,969 --> 00:19:50,302 [SCREAMING] 469 00:19:55,876 --> 00:19:58,131 A little screaming never hurts either. 470 00:19:59,256 --> 00:20:02,327 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.Addic7ed.com -- 32201

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