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>> PRINCIPAL VAGINA HERE
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DON'T LET THE NAME FOOL YOU.
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I'M VERY MUCH IN CHARGE
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REMINDING YOU THAT TONIGHT IS
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OUR ANNUAL FLU SEASON DANCE.
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I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I
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HAVE TO SAY THIS, BUT IF YOU
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HAVE THE FLU, STAY HOME.
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>> HEY.
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>> THE FLU SEASON DANCE IS ABOUT
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AWARENESS, NOT CELEBRATION.
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>> Morty: [ SIGHS ]
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>> YOU DON'T BRING DEAD BABIES
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TO PASSOVER.
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>> Morty: OKAY. HERE WE GO.
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H-HEY, JESSICA.
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UH...
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>> WHAT'S UP, MORTY?
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[ SNEEZES ]
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>> WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
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>> Morty: UM...
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>> WAIT, WAIT.
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WERE YOU ABOUT TO TALK...TO HER?
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>> Morty: WELL...I MEAN, I WAS
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THINKING ABOUT IT.
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>> DUDE, STAY IN YOUR LEAGUE.
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LOOK AT HOW HOT SHE IS.
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YOU DON'T SEE ME GOING TO A
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BIGGER SCHOOL IN A WEALTHIER
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DISTRICT AND HITTING ON THEIR
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PRETTIEST GIRL.
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>> GEE, THANKS, BRAD.
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>> I THROW BALLS FAR.
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YOU WANT GOOD WORDS?
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DATE A LANGUAGER.
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>> Jerry: TRY NOT TO WORRY ABOUT
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IT, MORTY.
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YOU'RE A GOOD KID, AND THERE'S
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NOT A PREMIUM ON THAT RIGHT NOW,
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BUT YOU'LL BE GETTING GIRLS
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SOMETIME AFTER BRAD'S OUT OF
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SHAPE.
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>> Morty: [ Sighing ] YOU'RE
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MISSING THE POINT, DAD.
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I DON'T WANT GIRLS.
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I WANT JESSICA.
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>> Jerry: AH, WELL, I REMEMBER
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FEELING THAT WAY ABOUT A YOUNG
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LADY NAMED "YOUR MOM," AND
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THAT'S NOT AN URBAN DISS.
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YOUR MOM WAS MY JESSICA.
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I REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME I SAW
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HER.
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I THOUGHT
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>> Rick: "I SHOULD GET HER
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PREGNANT, AND THEN SHE'LL HAVE
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TO MARRY ME."
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>> Jerry: I BEG YOUR PARDON,
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RICK INAPPROPRIATE.
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>> Rick: SORRY, PLEASE PROCEED
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WITH YOUR STORY ABOUT BANGING MY
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DAUGHTER IN HIGH SCHOOL.
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I'M NOT SURE YOU WANT TO TAKE
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ROMANTIC ADVICE FROM THIS GUY,
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MORTY.
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HIS MARRIAGE IS HANGING FROM A
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THREAD.
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>> Jerry: MY MARRIAGE IS FINE,
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THANK YOU.
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>> Rick: JERRY, IT'S YOUR
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HOUSE WHATEVER YOU SAY IT IS
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IS HOW IT IS BUT I THINK A
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BLIND MAN COULD SEE THAT BETH IS
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LOOKING FOR THE DOOR.
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I BARELY HAVE A REASON TO CARE,
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AND EVEN INOTICED.
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>> Morty: COME ON, RICK!
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DON'T TALK ABOUT MY PARENTS LIKE
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THAT.
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>> Rick: LISTEN, MORTY, I HATE
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TO BREAK IT TO YOU, BUT WHAT
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PEOPLE CALL "LOVE" IS JUST A
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CHEMICAL REACTION THAT COMPELS
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ANIMALS TO BREED.
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IT HITS HARD, MORTY, THEN IT
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SLOWLY FADES, LEAVING YOU
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STRANDED IN A FAILING MARRIAGE.
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I DID IT.
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YOUR PARENTS ARE GONNA DO IT.
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BREAK THE CYCLE, MORTY.
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RISE ABOVE. FOCUS ON SCIENCE.
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[ SLURPS ]
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>> Morty: ALL RIGHT, WELL, I'M
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GONNA GO GET DRESSED FOR THE
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DANCE.
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>> Jerry: YEAH, I'M JUST GOING
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TO...CHECK ON YOUR MOM.
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>> Rick: MORTY, HAND ME THAT
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SCREWDRIVER, HUH?
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I'M ALMOST FINISHED MAKING MY
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IONIC DEFIBULIZER, MORTY.
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IT'S GONNA BE GREAT.
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>> Morty: HEY, LISTEN, RICK.
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Y-Y-YOU KNOW HOW YOU SAID THAT,
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YOU KNOW, LOVE IS A CHEMICAL AND
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ALL THAT STUFF FROM EARLIER?
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WELL, I WAS THINKING, YOU KNOW,
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W-W COULD YOU MAKE SOME SORT
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OF CHEMICAL THING HAPPEN INSIDE
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OF JESSICA'S MIND, YOU KNOW, SO
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WHERE SHE FALLS IN LOVE WITH ME
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AND ALL THAT SORT OF THING?
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YOU KNOW, LIKE, MAYBE MAKE SOME
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SORT OF LOVE POTION OR
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SOMETHING?
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>> Rick: MORTY, THAT'S SUCH A
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POOR USE OF MY TIME.
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IT'S BENEATH ME.
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HAND ME THE SCREWDRIVER.
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>> Morty: YOU KNOW WHAT?
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NO, RICK!
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I'M NOT GONNA HAND YOU THE
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SCREWDRIVER.
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I-I'M NOT GONNA HAND YOU
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ANYTHING EVER AGAIN, RICK!
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I'M ALWAYS HELPING YOU WITH THIS
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AND THAT AND THE OTHER THING.
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W-W-W-W-W-WHAT ABOUT ME, RICK?
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W-W-W-W-WHY CAN'T YOU JUST HELP
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ME OUT ONCE ONCE FOR ONCE?
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>> Rick: [ GROANS ]
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YOU'RE GROWING UP FAST, MORTY.
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YOU'RE GROWING INTO A REAL BIG
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THORN STRAIGHT UP INTO MY ASS.
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[ CLEARS THROAT ]
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LISTEN, THIS IS CALLED OXYTOCIN.
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I EXTRACTED IT FROM A VOLE.
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DO YOU KNOW WHAT A VOLE IS,
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MORTY?
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YOU KNOW WHAT A VOLE IS?
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IT'S A IT'S A RODENT THAT
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MATES FOR LIFE, MORTY.
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THIS IS THE CHEMICAL RELEASED IN
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A MAMMAL'S BRAIN, YOU KNOW, THAT
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MAKES IT FALL IN LOVE.
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ALL RIGHT, MORTY, I JUST GOT TO
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[BURPS] COMBINE IT WITH SOME OF
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YOUR DNA.
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>> Morty: OH, WELL, OKAY.
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[ ZIPPER OPENS ]
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>> Rick: A HAIR, MORTY.
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I NEED ONE OF YOUR HAIRS.
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THIS ISN'T "GAME OF THRONES."
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>> Morty: OW!
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>> Rick: ALL RIGHT, MORTY.
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WHOEVER YOU SMEAR THIS STUFF ON
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WILL FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU, AND
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ONLY YOU, FOREVER.
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ARE YOU HAPPY NOW, MORTY?
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>> Morty: HECK, YEAH!
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THANK YOU, GRANDPA RICK.
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HEY, THERE'S NO...DANGERS OR
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ANYTHING, OR SIDE EFFECTS,
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RIGHT?
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>> Rick: W-W-W-WHAT AM I, A
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HACK?
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GO NUTS, MORTY. IT'S FOOLPROOF.
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EH, UNLESS SHE HAS THE FLU.
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>> Jerry: BETH, DO Y-YOU STILL
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LOVE ME?
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>> Beth: UGH, WHAT KIND OF
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QUESTION IS THAT?
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>> Jerry: THE "YES OR NO" KIND?
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[ LAUGHS NERVOUSLY ]
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>> Beth: JERRY, DO YOU WANT
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HOMELESS PEOPLE TO HAVE HOMES?
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>> Jerry: YES.
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>> Beth: ARE YOU GONNA BUILD
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THEM?
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>> Jerry: NO.
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>> Beth: THEN WHAT GOOD WAS THE
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"YES"?
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>> Jerry: WAIT, I-IS LOVING ME
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THE HOUSE OR THE HOMELESS
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PEOPLE?
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>> Beth: LOVING YOU IS WORK,
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JERRY HARD WORK, LIKE
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BUILDING A HOMELESS SHELTER
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NOBODY WANTS TO SAY NO TO DOING
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IT, BUT SOME PEOPLE PUT THE WORK
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IN.
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SO, WHAT DO YOU SAY?
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DO YOU SEE ME WORKING HERE?
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DOES THIS CONVERSATION SEEM
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TEDIOUS TO ME?
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>> Jerry: SORT OF.
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>> Beth: THEN I OBVIOUSLY SORT
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OFLOVE YOU, DON'T I?
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[ CELLPHONE CHIMES ]
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SO STOP ASKING, AND MAYBE I'LL
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LOVE YOU MORE.
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CRAP, THEY NEED ME AT THE HORSE
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HOSPITAL.
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>> Jerry: PUH! THIS LATE?
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>> Beth: THE RACETRACK HAD A
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STARLIGHT DERBY.
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THERE WAS A SEVEN-HORSE
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COLLISION, AND DAVIN'S THERE
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ALONE.
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>> Jerry: [ Thinking ] DAVIN.
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DAVIN.
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DAVIN! DAVIN.
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DAVIN! DAVIN!
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DAVIN! DAVIN!
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>> [ Rapping ] ♪
♪ FLU, YO ♪
♪
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♪
♪ YOU GOT TO BE AWARE ♪
♪
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♪
♪ AWARE OF ALL THE FLU ♪
♪
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♪
♪ UP IN THE AIR ♪
♪
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♪
♪ I'M-A GET ME A SHOT ♪
♪
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♪
♪ AND MAKE THE FLU GO AWAY ♪
♪
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♪
♪ FLU-HATING RAPPER ♪
♪
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♪
♪ JUST RAPPING AWAY ♪
♪
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♪
♪ YO, YO, FLU-HATING RAPPER ♪
♪
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♪
♪ IT'S A FLU-HATING RAPPER ♪
♪
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>> Morty: HEY, THERE, JESSICA.
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WHOA! OH, WHOOPSIE!
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>> OH, MY GOD.
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MORTY.
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YOU LOOK REALLY NICE TONIGHT.
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>> Morty: WOW, THANKS.
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>> I LOVE YOU, MORTY!
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I LOVE YOU SO MUCH IT BURNS!
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>> Morty: OH, MAN!
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I-I LOVE YOU TOO, JESSICA!
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>> [ SPITS ]
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IS THIS PUNK BOTHERING YOU,
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JESSICA?
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>> LEAVE HIM ALONE, JERK!
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I'M IN LOVE WITH HIM!
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HE IS MORE MAN THAN YOU WILL
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EVER BE!
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[ SNEEZES ]
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>> [ Rapping ] ♪
♪ THIS IS ABOUT
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FLU AWARENESS ♪
♪
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♪
♪ GOT TO BE AWARE OF THE FLU IN
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THE AIR-NESS ♪
♪
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♪
♪ YO, I'M A FLU-HATING RAPPER ♪
♪
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>> OH, MAN, MORTY.
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[ SIGHS ]
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I'M REALLY SORRY.
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>> Morty: OH, WELL, N-NO
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PROBLEM, BRAD.
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>> THERE'S SOMETHING SPECIAL
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ABOUT YOU, MORTY SO SPECIAL.
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MMM, YEAH.
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>> Morty: WHOA, TAKE IT EASY!
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>> GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF HIM!
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>> BACK OFF!
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I'M TRYING TO BE WITH MY MAN!
260
00:05:51,850 --> 00:05:52,930
>> THAT'S ENOUGH, BRADLEY!
261
00:05:52,950 --> 00:05:53,830
WE DON'T WANT YOU INJURING YOUR
262
00:05:53,850 --> 00:05:54,600
BALL-THROWING ARM.
263
00:05:54,620 --> 00:05:55,170
>> OH, COME ON,
264
00:05:55,190 --> 00:05:55,800
PRINCIPAL VAGINA.
265
00:05:55,820 --> 00:05:56,430
I JUST...
266
00:05:56,450 --> 00:05:57,099
>> NEVER LEAVE ME, MORTY.
267
00:05:57,120 --> 00:05:58,030
NEVER!
268
00:05:58,050 --> 00:05:59,630
>> Morty: UH, SURE.
269
00:05:59,650 --> 00:06:01,300
I MEAN, O-OF COURSE NOT.
270
00:06:01,320 --> 00:06:03,000
W-WHAT DO YOU THINK THAT WAS ALL
271
00:06:03,020 --> 00:06:04,070
ABOUT?
272
00:06:04,090 --> 00:06:05,470
>> WHO CARES? JUST HOLD ME.
273
00:06:05,490 --> 00:06:07,670
>> LET ME GO! I LOVE YOU, MORTY!
274
00:06:07,690 --> 00:06:08,870
[ SNEEZES ]
275
00:06:08,890 --> 00:06:10,030
LET GO OF ME!
276
00:06:10,050 --> 00:06:11,030
[ SNEEZES ]
277
00:06:11,050 --> 00:06:12,870
MORTY!
278
00:06:17,890 --> 00:06:19,099
>> Jerry: SHE'S GONNA BE ALONE
279
00:06:19,120 --> 00:06:20,230
WITH THAT GUY ALL NIGHT.
280
00:06:20,250 --> 00:06:21,430
>> Summer: YEAH, DAD, DIGGING
281
00:06:21,450 --> 00:06:22,700
AROUND THE INSIDES OF HORSES.
282
00:06:22,720 --> 00:06:23,130
IT'S NOT A VERY ROMANTIC
283
00:06:23,150 --> 00:06:24,030
SETTING.
284
00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:25,100
>> Rick: WELL, SUMMER, THERE'S
285
00:06:25,120 --> 00:06:26,300
ALWAYS THE POSSIBILITY THAT SHE
286
00:06:26,320 --> 00:06:27,500
MADE THE WHOLE WORK THING UP.
287
00:06:27,520 --> 00:06:28,729
MAYBE DAVIN'S DIGGING AROUND IN
288
00:06:28,750 --> 00:06:29,800
HERINSIDES.
289
00:06:29,820 --> 00:06:31,270
>> Summer: GRANDPA, SO GROSS!
290
00:06:31,290 --> 00:06:32,230
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT MY MOM.
291
00:06:32,250 --> 00:06:33,130
>> Rick: WELL, SHE'S MY
292
00:06:33,150 --> 00:06:34,000
DAUGHTER, SUMMER.
293
00:06:34,020 --> 00:06:35,030
I OUTRANK YOU.
294
00:06:35,050 --> 00:06:36,330
OR FAMILY MEANS NOTHING, IN
295
00:06:36,350 --> 00:06:37,900
WHICH CASE DON'T PLAY THAT CARD.
296
00:06:37,920 --> 00:06:38,930
>> Jerry: SHE'S NOT RESPONDING
297
00:06:38,950 --> 00:06:39,870
TO MY TEXTS!
298
00:06:39,890 --> 00:06:41,030
>> Summer: CAREFUL, DAD.
299
00:06:41,050 --> 00:06:42,130
JEALOUSY TURNS WOMEN OFF.
300
00:06:42,150 --> 00:06:43,070
>> Jerry: WELL, ISN'T THAT
301
00:06:43,090 --> 00:06:44,030
CONVENIENT?
302
00:06:44,050 --> 00:06:45,000
>> Rick: NOT FOR THE MEN THEY
303
00:06:45,020 --> 00:06:46,270
CHEAT ON, NO.
304
00:06:46,290 --> 00:06:48,200
>> Jerry: OKAY, I'M...GOING TO
305
00:06:48,220 --> 00:06:49,800
GO OUT...FOR SOME ICE CREAM.
306
00:06:49,820 --> 00:06:51,300
AND MAYBE STOP BY THE
307
00:06:51,320 --> 00:06:53,270
HOSPITAL...TO SUPPORT MY WIFE...
308
00:06:53,290 --> 00:06:54,530
WITH MY CONFIDENCE.
309
00:06:54,550 --> 00:06:55,770
[ DOOR CLOSES ]
310
00:06:55,790 --> 00:06:57,000
>> Summer: GOD, GRANDPA, YOU'RE
311
00:06:57,020 --> 00:06:57,930
SUCH A DICK.
312
00:06:57,950 --> 00:06:59,070
>> Rick: I'M SORRY, SUMMER.
313
00:06:59,090 --> 00:06:59,830
YOUR OPINION MEANS VERY LITTLE
314
00:06:59,850 --> 00:07:00,700
TO ME.
315
00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:01,830
HOW COME YOU'RE NOT AT THIS
316
00:07:01,850 --> 00:07:02,600
STUPID DANCE EVERYONE LOVES SO
317
00:07:02,620 --> 00:07:03,170
MUCH?
318
00:07:03,190 --> 00:07:04,200
>> Summer: SCREW THAT.
319
00:07:04,220 --> 00:07:05,130
I DON'T WANT TO GET SICK.
320
00:07:05,150 --> 00:07:05,930
IT'S FLU SEASON.
321
00:07:05,950 --> 00:07:06,729
>> Rick: IT IS?
322
00:07:06,750 --> 00:07:07,570
>> Summer: YEAH.
323
00:07:07,590 --> 00:07:08,700
>> Rick: UH-OH.
324
00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:10,730
[ HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYS ]
325
00:07:14,190 --> 00:07:15,469
>> Morty: PLEASE JUST LET THIS
326
00:07:15,490 --> 00:07:16,000
WORK OUT.
327
00:07:16,020 --> 00:07:16,930
>> [ MOANS ]
328
00:07:16,950 --> 00:07:19,000
DO IT, MORTY. DO IT.
329
00:07:19,020 --> 00:07:20,169
RIP MY CLOTHES OFF AND MATE WITH
330
00:07:20,190 --> 00:07:21,500
ME FOR LIFE!
331
00:07:21,520 --> 00:07:22,200
[ GROWLS ]
332
00:07:22,220 --> 00:07:23,430
>> Morty: UM...
333
00:07:23,450 --> 00:07:24,870
CAN WE MAYBE GO SOMEWHERE MORE
334
00:07:24,890 --> 00:07:25,870
PRIVATE?
335
00:07:25,890 --> 00:07:27,130
>> JESSICA, GET A HOLD OF
336
00:07:27,150 --> 00:07:27,930
YOURSELF!
337
00:07:27,950 --> 00:07:29,370
[ GRUNTS ]
338
00:07:29,390 --> 00:07:30,700
YOU DON'T DESERVE TO CARRY
339
00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:32,270
MORTY'S GENES.
340
00:07:32,290 --> 00:07:34,500
>> [ Rapping ] ♪
♪ I LOVE MORTY ♪
♪
341
00:07:34,520 --> 00:07:36,930
♪
♪ AND I HOPE MORTY LOVES ME ♪
♪
342
00:07:36,950 --> 00:07:38,770
♪
♪ I'D LIKE TO WRAP MY ARMS
343
00:07:38,790 --> 00:07:40,170
AROUND HIM ♪
♪
344
00:07:40,190 --> 00:07:41,969
♪
♪ AND FEEL HIM INSIDE ME ♪
♪
345
00:07:41,990 --> 00:07:43,370
>> Morty: OH, CRAP.
346
00:07:43,390 --> 00:07:45,669
[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]
347
00:07:45,690 --> 00:07:48,400
>> MORTY!
348
00:07:48,420 --> 00:07:49,430
>> Rick: MORTY, COME ON!
349
00:07:49,450 --> 00:07:50,500
WE GOT TO GET YOU OUT OF HERE.
350
00:07:50,520 --> 00:07:51,669
YOU'RE NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS
351
00:07:51,690 --> 00:07:52,500
BECAUSE IT USUALLY NEVER
352
00:07:52,520 --> 00:07:54,099
HAPPENS, BUT I MADE A MISTAKE.
353
00:07:54,120 --> 00:07:55,130
[ BOTH PANTING ]
354
00:07:55,150 --> 00:07:56,030
COME ON, MORTY.
355
00:07:56,050 --> 00:07:56,770
WE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE.
356
00:07:56,790 --> 00:07:57,170
COME ON.
357
00:07:57,190 --> 00:07:57,900
>> MORTY!
358
00:07:57,920 --> 00:07:58,700
>> Morty: [ WAILS ]
359
00:07:58,720 --> 00:07:59,570
>> ARE YOU OKAY?
360
00:07:59,590 --> 00:08:00,130
>> Morty: I'M FINE!
361
00:08:00,150 --> 00:08:01,100
>> OH, GOOD.
362
00:08:01,120 --> 00:08:02,230
IF ANYTHING EVER HAPPENED TO
363
00:08:02,250 --> 00:08:03,870
YOU, I WOULD KILL MYSELF.
364
00:08:03,890 --> 00:08:05,770
I LOVE YOU BAD, MO-MO!
365
00:08:05,790 --> 00:08:07,630
[ ALL PANTING ]
366
00:08:07,650 --> 00:08:10,000
[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]
367
00:08:10,020 --> 00:08:11,200
>> MORTY, THE PRINCIPAL AND I
368
00:08:11,220 --> 00:08:12,470
HAVE DISCUSSED IT, A-A-AND WE'RE
369
00:08:12,490 --> 00:08:13,600
BOTH INSECURE ENOUGH TO AGREE TO
370
00:08:13,620 --> 00:08:14,830
A THREE-WAY!
371
00:08:19,550 --> 00:08:20,870
>> Rick: I DIDN'T REALIZE WHEN I
372
00:08:20,890 --> 00:08:21,870
GAVE YOU THAT SERUM THAT JESSICA
373
00:08:21,890 --> 00:08:22,870
HAD THE FLU YOU KNOW,
374
00:08:22,890 --> 00:08:23,930
T-T-T-T-T-T-T-THAT MIGHT HAVE
375
00:08:23,950 --> 00:08:24,670
BEEN VALUABLE INFORMATION FOR
376
00:08:24,690 --> 00:08:25,400
ME, MORTY.
377
00:08:25,420 --> 00:08:26,170
>> Morty: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING
378
00:08:26,190 --> 00:08:27,100
ON, RICK?
379
00:08:27,120 --> 00:08:28,230
>> Rick: WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE?
380
00:08:28,250 --> 00:08:29,530
T-T-T-THE SERUM IS PIGGYBACKING
381
00:08:29,550 --> 00:08:30,330
ON THE VIRUS.
382
00:08:30,350 --> 00:08:31,900
IT'S GONE AIRBORNE, MORTY.
383
00:08:31,920 --> 00:08:33,200
>> Morty: OH, CRAP.
384
00:08:33,220 --> 00:08:34,130
WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO, RICK?
385
00:08:34,150 --> 00:08:34,870
>> Rick: IT'S GONNA BE FINE,
386
00:08:34,890 --> 00:08:35,699
MORTY, RELAX.
387
00:08:35,720 --> 00:08:36,900
I WHIPPED UP AND ANTIDOTE.
388
00:08:36,919 --> 00:08:37,729
IT'S BASED ON PRAYING-MANTIS
389
00:08:37,750 --> 00:08:39,030
DNA.
390
00:08:39,049 --> 00:08:40,000
YOU KNOW, PRAYING MANTISES ARE
391
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:40,630
THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF VOLES,
392
00:08:40,650 --> 00:08:41,400
MORTY.
393
00:08:41,419 --> 00:08:42,400
I MEAN, THEY THEY MATE ONCE,
394
00:08:42,419 --> 00:08:43,370
AND THEN THEY, YOU KNOW,
395
00:08:43,390 --> 00:08:44,370
DECAPITATE THE PARTNER.
396
00:08:44,390 --> 00:08:45,930
I MEAN, IT'S A WHOLE RITUAL.
397
00:08:45,950 --> 00:08:47,030
IT'S REALLY GRUESOME AND TOTALLY
398
00:08:47,050 --> 00:08:47,930
OPPOSITE.
399
00:08:47,950 --> 00:08:49,070
THERE'S NO LOVE AT ALL.
400
00:08:49,090 --> 00:08:50,330
I-I-I BASICALLY MIXED THIS WITH
401
00:08:50,350 --> 00:08:51,900
A MORE CONTAGIOUS FLU VIRUS.
402
00:08:51,920 --> 00:08:53,229
IT SHOULD NEUTRALIZE THE WHOLE
403
00:08:53,250 --> 00:08:54,470
THING, MORTY.
404
00:08:54,490 --> 00:08:56,030
IT'LL ALL BE OVER VERY SHORTLY.
405
00:08:56,050 --> 00:08:57,430
[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]
406
00:09:01,090 --> 00:09:02,270
UH, BY THE WAY, MORTY, I KNOW
407
00:09:02,290 --> 00:09:03,400
YOU DIDN'T ASK OR ANYTHING, BUT
408
00:09:03,420 --> 00:09:04,170
I'M NOT INTERESTED IN HAVING SEX
409
00:09:04,190 --> 00:09:05,100
WITH YOU.
410
00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:06,030
THESE SERUMS, THEY DON'T WORK ON
411
00:09:06,050 --> 00:09:06,729
ANYBODY RELATED TO YOU
412
00:09:06,750 --> 00:09:07,570
GENETICALLY.
413
00:09:07,590 --> 00:09:10,530
>> MORTY!
414
00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:12,530
[ ALL GROANING ]
415
00:09:21,450 --> 00:09:22,900
>> Rick: OKAY, WELL, SOMETIMES,
416
00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:23,900
SCIENCE IS MORE ART THAN
417
00:09:23,920 --> 00:09:25,030
SCIENCE, MORTY.
418
00:09:25,050 --> 00:09:26,270
A LOT OF PEOPLE DON'T GET THAT.
419
00:09:34,290 --> 00:09:35,599
>> Jerry: [ GASPS ]
420
00:09:35,620 --> 00:09:38,430
[ TIRES SCREECH ]
421
00:09:38,450 --> 00:09:40,600
COME ON. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
422
00:09:40,620 --> 00:09:41,530
HELLO!
423
00:09:41,550 --> 00:09:43,570
>> MORTY!
424
00:09:43,590 --> 00:09:44,670
>> YOU'RE NOT MORTY!
425
00:09:44,690 --> 00:09:46,500
BRING US MORTY!
426
00:09:54,950 --> 00:09:55,900
[ GUN COCKS ]
427
00:09:55,920 --> 00:09:57,370
>> Jerry: NOBODY'S KILLING ME
428
00:09:57,390 --> 00:09:58,770
UNTIL AFTER I CATCH MY WIFE WITH
429
00:09:58,790 --> 00:10:00,370
ANOTHER MAN.
430
00:10:00,390 --> 00:10:02,199
>> I HAD SEX WITH BILLY.
431
00:10:02,220 --> 00:10:03,070
>> BUT YOU WERE ALREADY
432
00:10:03,090 --> 00:10:04,030
PREGNANT!
433
00:10:04,050 --> 00:10:05,070
>> YEAH, SO WHAT'S THE WORST
434
00:10:05,090 --> 00:10:06,200
THAT COULD HAPPEN?
435
00:10:06,220 --> 00:10:07,670
>> WE INTERRUPT "PREGNANT BABY"
436
00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:08,800
WITH BREAKING NEWS.
437
00:10:08,820 --> 00:10:10,300
>> Summer: [ GROANS ] COME ON.
438
00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:12,000
>> THIS JUST IN MORTY SMITH'S
439
00:10:12,020 --> 00:10:13,370
WHEREABOUTS ARE STILL UNKNOWN.
440
00:10:13,390 --> 00:10:14,500
>> Summer: WHAT THE HELL?
441
00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:15,699
>> THE ONLY THING THAT IS KNOWN
442
00:10:15,720 --> 00:10:17,230
IS...HOW CUTE HE IS.
443
00:10:17,250 --> 00:10:19,070
>> I LOVE HIM SO MUCH, I WANT TO
444
00:10:19,090 --> 00:10:20,530
MAKE LOVE TO HIM AND THEN EAT
445
00:10:20,550 --> 00:10:21,470
HIS HEAD.
446
00:10:21,490 --> 00:10:22,930
>> I LOVE HIM MORE THAN YOU DO,
447
00:10:22,950 --> 00:10:24,000
HAROLD!
448
00:10:24,020 --> 00:10:25,569
>> YOU WISH, YOU STUPID BITCH!
449
00:10:25,590 --> 00:10:26,600
>> MORTY'S MINE!
450
00:10:26,620 --> 00:10:27,770
>> MORTY'S MINE!
451
00:10:27,790 --> 00:10:28,969
>> MEANT TO BE TOGETHER!
452
00:10:28,990 --> 00:10:30,530
>> [ SPEAKING ARABIC]
453
00:10:30,550 --> 00:10:31,700
MORTY!
454
00:10:31,720 --> 00:10:33,900
[ SPEAKING ARABIC]
455
00:10:33,920 --> 00:10:38,199
[ BANGING ON DOOR ]
456
00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:39,970
>> WHERE IS MORTY?
457
00:10:39,990 --> 00:10:42,530
>> Summer: [ SCREAMS ]
458
00:10:51,220 --> 00:10:52,630
[ CONVERSING IN NATIVE
459
00:10:52,650 --> 00:10:53,470
LANGUAGE]
460
00:10:53,490 --> 00:10:55,230
>> Morty: OH, MY GOD, RICK.
461
00:10:55,250 --> 00:10:56,530
THE WHOLE WORLD IS INFECTED!
462
00:10:56,550 --> 00:10:57,900
>> Rick: YEAH, IT'S PRETTY WILD
463
00:10:57,920 --> 00:10:59,030
HOW FAST THAT SPREAD.
464
00:10:59,050 --> 00:11:00,170
I'VE REALLY OUTDONE MYSELF.
465
00:11:00,190 --> 00:11:01,370
>> Morty: OUTDONE YOURSELF?!
466
00:11:01,390 --> 00:11:02,030
W-W A-ARE ARE YOU KIDDING
467
00:11:02,050 --> 00:11:03,030
ME, RICK?
468
00:11:03,050 --> 00:11:04,200
THIS IS NOT OKAY!
469
00:11:04,220 --> 00:11:05,330
NOT ONLY DO THEY ALL WANT TO
470
00:11:05,350 --> 00:11:06,400
HAVE SEX WITH ME, BUT, YOU KNOW,
471
00:11:06,420 --> 00:11:07,170
NOW THEY WANT TO EAT ME
472
00:11:07,190 --> 00:11:08,100
AFTERWARDS!
473
00:11:08,120 --> 00:11:09,030
>> Rick: YEAH, I DON'T KNOW WHAT
474
00:11:09,050 --> 00:11:10,100
I WAS THINKING.
475
00:11:10,120 --> 00:11:10,930
MANTISES ARE THEY OPPOSITE OF
476
00:11:10,950 --> 00:11:11,800
VOLES?
477
00:11:11,820 --> 00:11:13,000
I MEAN, OBVIOUSLY, DNA's A
478
00:11:13,020 --> 00:11:13,870
LITTLE MORE COMPLICATED THAN
479
00:11:13,890 --> 00:11:14,800
THAT.
480
00:11:14,820 --> 00:11:15,970
YOU KNOW WHAT, THOUGH, MORTY?
481
00:11:15,990 --> 00:11:16,830
THIS RIGHT HERE'S GONNA DO THE
482
00:11:16,850 --> 00:11:17,670
TRICK, BABY.
483
00:11:17,690 --> 00:11:18,770
IT'S KOALA MIXED WITH
484
00:11:18,790 --> 00:11:20,829
RATTLESNAKE, CHIMPANZEE, CACTUS,
485
00:11:20,850 --> 00:11:22,770
SHARK, GOLDEN RETRIEVER, AND
486
00:11:22,790 --> 00:11:24,400
JUST A SMIDGE OF DINOSAUR.
487
00:11:24,420 --> 00:11:25,099
SHOULD ADD UP TO NORMAL
488
00:11:25,120 --> 00:11:25,930
HUMANITY.
489
00:11:25,950 --> 00:11:26,970
>> Morty: I DON'T THAT
490
00:11:26,990 --> 00:11:28,070
DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE, RICK.
491
00:11:28,090 --> 00:11:28,830
HOW DOES THAT ADD UP TO NORMAL
492
00:11:28,850 --> 00:11:29,900
HUMANITY?
493
00:11:29,920 --> 00:11:30,870
>> Morty: WHAT, MORTY, YOU WANT
494
00:11:30,890 --> 00:11:31,800
ME TO SHOW YOU MY MATH?
495
00:11:31,820 --> 00:11:32,800
I'M SORRY A-ARE YOU THE
496
00:11:32,820 --> 00:11:33,730
SCIENTIST OR ARE YOU THE KID
497
00:11:33,750 --> 00:11:34,770
THAT WANTED TO GET LAID?
498
00:11:37,150 --> 00:11:38,230
>> [ EXHALES DEEPLY ]
499
00:11:38,250 --> 00:11:39,700
WELL, I'M GLAD WE SAVED ALL
500
00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:40,900
THOSE HORSES, BUT I'M ALMOST
501
00:11:40,920 --> 00:11:42,099
SORRY WE'RE FINISHED.
502
00:11:42,120 --> 00:11:43,070
>> Beth: YES, IT'S SATISFYING
503
00:11:43,090 --> 00:11:43,970
WORK.
504
00:11:43,990 --> 00:11:45,170
>> UNH-UNH-UNH, IT'S, UH
505
00:11:45,190 --> 00:11:46,470
IT'S MORE THAN THE WORK.
506
00:11:46,490 --> 00:11:48,800
I LOVE BEING IN THAT STERILIZED
507
00:11:48,820 --> 00:11:50,970
ROOM, SEALED OFF FROM THE WORLD.
508
00:11:50,990 --> 00:11:51,730
IT'S THE ONLY TIME I CAN REALLY
509
00:11:51,750 --> 00:11:53,270
THINK...AND FEEL.
510
00:11:53,290 --> 00:11:54,300
[ SLOW MUSIC PLAYS ]
511
00:11:54,320 --> 00:11:55,800
>> Beth: HMM, UH, WHAT ARE YOU
512
00:11:55,820 --> 00:11:56,830
DOING?
513
00:11:56,850 --> 00:11:58,000
>> I'M PLAYING AFRICAN DREAM
514
00:11:58,020 --> 00:11:59,100
POP.
515
00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:00,370
WHAT DO YOUDO AFTER A LONG
516
00:12:00,390 --> 00:12:00,900
NIGHT?
517
00:12:00,920 --> 00:12:02,430
[ CLICK ]
518
00:12:02,450 --> 00:12:04,130
>> Beth: OH, HA, UM, HEY, I B
519
00:12:04,150 --> 00:12:05,270
I'D BETTER GET GOING.
520
00:12:05,290 --> 00:12:06,730
UM, JERRY'S BEEN TEXTING SOME
521
00:12:06,750 --> 00:12:07,670
PRETTY HIGH-MAINTENANCE STUFF.
522
00:12:07,690 --> 00:12:08,470
>> BETH...
523
00:12:08,490 --> 00:12:09,430
>> Beth: WHAT IS IT, DAVIN?
524
00:12:09,450 --> 00:12:11,600
>> JUST ONCE, I'D LIKE TO
525
00:12:11,620 --> 00:12:12,600
KNOW
526
00:12:12,620 --> 00:12:13,930
[ SNEEZES ]
527
00:12:13,950 --> 00:12:15,670
...W-W-WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO GIVE
528
00:12:15,690 --> 00:12:16,830
YOUR SON A BATH.
529
00:12:16,850 --> 00:12:18,230
>> Beth: WHAT?!
530
00:12:18,250 --> 00:12:20,800
>> WHAT DOES MORTY'S SKIN SMELL
531
00:12:20,820 --> 00:12:21,770
LIKE?
532
00:12:21,790 --> 00:12:23,069
HOW SOFT...
533
00:12:23,090 --> 00:12:24,330
[ GRUNTS ]
534
00:12:24,350 --> 00:12:26,770
HOW SOFT ARE HIS PRIVATES?
535
00:12:26,790 --> 00:12:28,370
>> Beth: LET GO OF ME, DAVIN!
536
00:12:29,950 --> 00:12:31,170
[ GLASS SHATTERS ]
537
00:12:31,190 --> 00:12:34,630
>> [ ROARS ]
538
00:12:34,650 --> 00:12:36,829
TAKE ME TO MORTY.
539
00:12:36,850 --> 00:12:37,830
>> Jerry: [ GRUNTS ]
540
00:12:37,850 --> 00:12:39,600
>> YOU'RE NOT MORTY.
541
00:12:39,620 --> 00:12:40,830
>> Jerry: NO.
542
00:12:40,850 --> 00:12:43,770
I'M MR. CROWBAR, AND THIS IS
543
00:12:43,790 --> 00:12:45,870
MY FRIEND, WHO IS ALSO A
544
00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:47,170
CROWBAR.
545
00:12:47,190 --> 00:12:49,070
>> THAT'S...STUPID.
546
00:12:49,090 --> 00:12:51,670
>> Jerry: [ GRUNTING ]
547
00:12:51,690 --> 00:12:53,100
YEAH?
548
00:12:53,120 --> 00:12:54,000
WELL, LOOK WHERE BEING SMART GOT
549
00:12:54,020 --> 00:12:54,829
YOU.
550
00:12:54,850 --> 00:12:56,630
>> Beth: JERRY! THANK GOD!
551
00:12:56,650 --> 00:12:57,930
>> Jerry: GOD?
552
00:12:57,950 --> 00:12:59,900
GOD'S TURNING PEOPLE INTO INSECT
553
00:12:59,920 --> 00:13:01,300
MONSTERS, BETH.
554
00:13:01,320 --> 00:13:02,630
I'M THE ONE BEATING THEM TO
555
00:13:02,650 --> 00:13:03,170
DEATH.
556
00:13:03,190 --> 00:13:04,200
THANK ME.
557
00:13:04,220 --> 00:13:05,600
>> Beth: THANK YOU, JERRY.
558
00:13:05,620 --> 00:13:08,700
THANK YOU.
559
00:13:11,320 --> 00:13:12,730
>> Rick: TAKE A GOOD LOOK DOWN
560
00:13:12,750 --> 00:13:13,930
THERE, MORTY, AND SOAK IT IN,
561
00:13:13,950 --> 00:13:15,130
BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, ONCE I PULL
562
00:13:15,150 --> 00:13:15,970
THIS LEVER, IT'S ALL BACK TO
563
00:13:15,990 --> 00:13:16,870
NORMAL.
564
00:13:16,890 --> 00:13:18,069
>> Morty: JUST DO IT ALREADY.
565
00:13:18,090 --> 00:13:19,130
>> Rick: WELL, TECHNICALLY,
566
00:13:19,150 --> 00:13:20,230
MORTY, THERE'S NO RUSH.
567
00:13:20,250 --> 00:13:21,230
I MEAN, YOU KNOW, O-ONCE IT'S
568
00:13:21,250 --> 00:13:22,000
FIXED, IT'S DONE.
569
00:13:22,020 --> 00:13:22,970
IT'S FIXED.
570
00:13:22,990 --> 00:13:24,330
YOU KNOW, WE COULD WE COULD
571
00:13:24,350 --> 00:13:25,900
JUST ENJOY IT FOR A LITTLE BIT.
572
00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:26,730
I MEAN, L-L-L-LOOK AT HOW CRAZY
573
00:13:26,750 --> 00:13:27,430
IT IS.
574
00:13:27,450 --> 00:13:28,770
I MEAN, MORTY, W-W-WHEN'S THE
575
00:13:28,790 --> 00:13:29,770
NEXT TIME YOU'RE GONNA SEE
576
00:13:29,790 --> 00:13:30,870
SOMETHING LIKE THIS?
577
00:13:30,890 --> 00:13:31,970
I MEAN, SOAK IT IN, YOU KNOW?
578
00:13:31,990 --> 00:13:32,830
IT'S IT'S PRETTY NEAT.
579
00:13:32,850 --> 00:13:33,770
IT'S PRETTY INTERESTING.
580
00:13:33,790 --> 00:13:34,630
>> Morty: THAT'S IT, RICK!
581
00:13:34,650 --> 00:13:35,069
I'M PULLING THE LEVER.
582
00:13:35,090 --> 00:13:36,200
[ GRUNTS ]
583
00:13:42,920 --> 00:13:43,470
>> Rick: W-WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE,
584
00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:44,200
MORTY?
585
00:13:44,220 --> 00:13:45,100
LOOKS LIKE I WAS RIGHT AND YOU
586
00:13:45,120 --> 00:13:46,030
WERE WRONG, HUH?
587
00:13:46,050 --> 00:13:47,100
I-I-I-I-I-I-I BET YOU FEEL
588
00:13:47,120 --> 00:13:47,930
PRETTY STUPID RIGHT ABOUT NOW,
589
00:13:47,950 --> 00:13:48,800
HUH?
590
00:13:48,820 --> 00:13:50,000
I-I-I BET YOU FEEL LIKE THE
591
00:13:50,020 --> 00:13:51,199
WORLD'S SMALLEST MAN THAT YOU
592
00:13:51,220 --> 00:13:52,230
WERE DOUBTING ME ABOUT THIS
593
00:13:52,250 --> 00:13:53,370
WHOLE THING, MORTY.
594
00:13:53,390 --> 00:13:54,470
>> Morty: OH, RICK, SOMETHING'S
595
00:13:54,490 --> 00:13:55,070
NOT RIGHT.
596
00:13:55,090 --> 00:13:55,900
>> Rick: [ SIGHS ]
597
00:13:55,920 --> 00:13:56,870
YEAH, YOU.
598
00:13:56,890 --> 00:13:57,900
YOU'RE NOT RIGHT EVER.
599
00:13:57,920 --> 00:13:58,800
>> Morty: NO, NO!
600
00:13:58,820 --> 00:14:00,000
LOOK, YOU IDIOT!
601
00:14:00,020 --> 00:14:01,329
[ ALL SCREAMING ]
602
00:14:12,050 --> 00:14:14,100
[ ALL SPEAKING NATIVE LANGUAGE ]
603
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:17,830
[ ALL GROANING ]
604
00:14:20,650 --> 00:14:24,370
[ ALL ULULATING ]
605
00:14:24,390 --> 00:14:25,100
>> Rick: BET YOU'RE LOVING THIS,
606
00:14:25,120 --> 00:14:26,170
MORTY.
607
00:14:26,190 --> 00:14:27,430
THIS MUST BE THE BEST DAY OF
608
00:14:27,450 --> 00:14:28,200
YOUR LIFE.
609
00:14:28,220 --> 00:14:29,530
YOU GET TO BE THE MAYOR OF
610
00:14:29,550 --> 00:14:30,870
I TOLD YOU TOWN.
611
00:14:30,890 --> 00:14:32,030
[ SLURPS ]
612
00:14:32,050 --> 00:14:32,930
YOU'RE WELCOME.
613
00:14:32,950 --> 00:14:33,700
[ SLURPS ]
614
00:14:42,890 --> 00:14:43,830
>> Jerry: HOLD ON.
615
00:14:43,850 --> 00:14:44,970
>> Beth: [ WHIMPERS ]
616
00:14:44,990 --> 00:14:47,570
[ ENGINE REVS, TIRES SQUEAL ]
617
00:15:02,090 --> 00:15:03,500
[ GUN COCKS ]
618
00:15:03,520 --> 00:15:04,770
>> Jerry: I WISH THAT SHOTGUN
619
00:15:04,790 --> 00:15:05,870
WAS MY PENIS.
620
00:15:05,890 --> 00:15:07,170
>> Beth: IF IT WERE, YOU COULD
621
00:15:07,190 --> 00:15:08,870
CALL ME ERNEST HEMINGWAY.
622
00:15:08,890 --> 00:15:10,230
>> Jerry: I DON'T GET IT, AND I
623
00:15:10,250 --> 00:15:11,230
DON'T NEED TO.
624
00:15:11,250 --> 00:15:12,300
[ BOTH MOANING ]
625
00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:14,230
>> Summer: MOM! DAD!
626
00:15:14,250 --> 00:15:16,800
>> Both: SUMMER!
627
00:15:16,820 --> 00:15:18,070
>> Beth: [ SIGHS ]
628
00:15:18,090 --> 00:15:19,270
>> Jerry: WHERE'S MORTY?
629
00:15:19,290 --> 00:15:20,770
>> Summer: I DON'T KNOW.
630
00:15:20,790 --> 00:15:21,800
DO YOU THINK GRANDPA RICK HAD
631
00:15:21,820 --> 00:15:22,830
SOMETHING TO DO WITH THIS?
632
00:15:22,850 --> 00:15:23,770
>> Jerry: IT'S NOT FAIR TO
633
00:15:23,790 --> 00:15:24,630
ASSUME THAT, SUMMER.
634
00:15:24,650 --> 00:15:25,270
>> Beth: OH, NOT FAIR?
635
00:15:25,290 --> 00:15:26,800
GIVE ME A BREAK.
636
00:15:26,820 --> 00:15:28,700
HE IS A SELFISH, IRRESPONSIBLE
637
00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:30,370
ASS, AND HE LEFT MY MOTHER.
638
00:15:30,390 --> 00:15:32,970
A REAL MAN STANDS BY HIS WOMAN.
639
00:15:32,990 --> 00:15:37,870
[ BOTH MOANING ]
640
00:15:37,890 --> 00:15:39,170
>> Summer: Tchoo.
641
00:15:39,190 --> 00:15:40,930
Tchoo-tchoo-tchoo. Tchoo-tchoo.
642
00:15:40,950 --> 00:15:42,100
>> Rick: BOY, MORTY, I REALLY
643
00:15:42,120 --> 00:15:42,970
CRONENBERGED THE WORLD UP,
644
00:15:42,990 --> 00:15:43,830
DIDN'T I?
645
00:15:43,850 --> 00:15:45,070
WE GOT A WHOLE PLANET OF
646
00:15:45,090 --> 00:15:46,070
CRONENBERGS WALKING AROUND DOWN
647
00:15:46,090 --> 00:15:47,070
THERE, MORTY.
648
00:15:47,090 --> 00:15:48,100
A-AT LEAST THEY'RE NOT IN LOVE
649
00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:49,200
WITH YOU ANYMORE, THOUGH.
650
00:15:49,220 --> 00:15:50,000
THAT'S A HUGE STEP IN THE RIGHT
651
00:15:50,020 --> 00:15:50,800
DIRECTION.
652
00:15:50,820 --> 00:15:51,730
>> Morty: OH, MY GOD!
653
00:15:51,750 --> 00:15:52,970
IT'S A LIVING NIGHTMARE!
654
00:15:52,990 --> 00:15:54,100
HOW COULD YOU BE SO
655
00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:55,370
IRRESPONSIBLE, RICK?
656
00:15:55,390 --> 00:15:57,030
>> Rick: ME IRRESPONSIBLE?!
657
00:15:57,050 --> 00:15:58,270
YOU ALL I WANTED YOU TO DO
658
00:15:58,290 --> 00:15:59,099
WAS HAND ME A SCREWDRIVER,
659
00:15:59,120 --> 00:16:00,030
MORTY!
660
00:16:00,050 --> 00:16:01,300
YOU'RE THE ONE WHO WANTED TO
661
00:16:01,320 --> 00:16:02,870
BE WANTED ME TO BUCKLE DOWN
662
00:16:02,890 --> 00:16:05,000
AND MAKE YOU UP A...ROOFIE-JUICE
663
00:16:05,020 --> 00:16:06,829
SERUM SO YOU COULD ROOFIE THAT
664
00:16:06,850 --> 00:16:08,330
POOR GIRL AT YOUR SCHOOL.
665
00:16:08,350 --> 00:16:10,170
I MEAN, G W-W-W-W-W W
666
00:16:10,190 --> 00:16:11,370
ARE YOU KIDDING ME, MORTY?
667
00:16:11,390 --> 00:16:12,330
YOU'RE GONNA TRY TO TAKE THE
668
00:16:12,350 --> 00:16:13,400
HIGH ROAD ON THIS ONE?
669
00:16:13,420 --> 00:16:14,000
Y-Y-Y-Y-YOU'RE A LITTLE CREEP,
670
00:16:14,020 --> 00:16:14,829
MORTY.
671
00:16:14,850 --> 00:16:15,830
Y-YOU'RE A YOU'RE
672
00:16:15,850 --> 00:16:16,800
YOU'RE YOU'RE JUST A LITTLE
673
00:16:16,820 --> 00:16:17,770
CREEPY...CREEP PERSON.
674
00:16:17,790 --> 00:16:18,829
>> Morty: ALL RIGHT, FINE.
675
00:16:18,850 --> 00:16:19,970
I SHOULD HAVE JUST LISTENED TO
676
00:16:19,990 --> 00:16:20,670
YOU WHEN YOU REFUSED TO MAKE THE
677
00:16:20,690 --> 00:16:21,430
SERUM.
678
00:16:21,450 --> 00:16:22,700
I'M WILLING TO ACCEPT MY PART OF
679
00:16:22,720 --> 00:16:23,730
THE BLAME FOR THIS, RICK.
680
00:16:23,750 --> 00:16:24,570
BUT I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING
681
00:16:24,590 --> 00:16:25,330
YOU KNOW WHAT?
682
00:16:25,350 --> 00:16:26,500
YOU GOT TO ACCEPT YOUR PART OF
683
00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:27,300
THE BLAME!
684
00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:28,430
I'M NOT THE ONE WHO FOULED UP
685
00:16:28,450 --> 00:16:29,230
THE SERUM!
686
00:16:29,250 --> 00:16:30,470
I'M NOT THE ONE WHO WHO
687
00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:31,930
WHO WHO HAPHAZARDLY, YOU
688
00:16:31,950 --> 00:16:33,270
KNOW, MIXED A BUNCH OF NONSENSE
689
00:16:33,290 --> 00:16:34,470
TOGETHER AND CREATED A BUNCH OF
690
00:16:34,490 --> 00:16:35,230
CRONENBERGS!
691
00:16:35,250 --> 00:16:36,300
YOU GOT TO FIX THIS, RICK!
692
00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:36,930
>> Morty: ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT,
693
00:16:36,950 --> 00:16:37,830
MORTY.
694
00:16:37,850 --> 00:16:38,900
YOU KNOW, W-W-W-WE ARE IN A
695
00:16:38,920 --> 00:16:40,270
PRETTY DEEP HOLE, HERE, BUT I DO
696
00:16:40,290 --> 00:16:41,800
HAVE ONE EMERGENCY SOLUTION THAT
697
00:16:41,820 --> 00:16:43,030
I CAN USE THAT'LL KIND OF PUT
698
00:16:43,050 --> 00:16:44,100
EVERYTHING BACK TO NORMAL,
699
00:16:44,120 --> 00:16:45,300
RELATIVELY SPEAKING.
700
00:16:45,320 --> 00:16:46,800
HERE, MORTY, PUT THIS ON WHILE I
701
00:16:46,820 --> 00:16:48,600
DO A LITTLE BIT OF SCOUTING.
702
00:16:51,220 --> 00:16:53,370
[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]
703
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:02,900
>> Morty: WOW, RICK, I GOT TO
704
00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:04,170
SAY YOU REALLY PULLED A
705
00:17:04,190 --> 00:17:05,070
RABBIT OUT OF YOUR HAT THIS
706
00:17:05,089 --> 00:17:06,030
TIME.
707
00:17:06,050 --> 00:17:07,369
I MEAN, I-I REALLY THOUGHT THAT
708
00:17:07,390 --> 00:17:08,930
THE WHOLE PLACE WAS GONNA BE
709
00:17:08,950 --> 00:17:10,300
MESSED UP FOR GOOD, BUT HERE,
710
00:17:10,319 --> 00:17:11,800
YOU DID IT Y-Y-YOU YOU
711
00:17:11,819 --> 00:17:13,099
YOU FIGURED OUT THAT CRAZY
712
00:17:13,120 --> 00:17:14,030
SOLUTION, LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO.
713
00:17:14,050 --> 00:17:14,869
WHOO!
714
00:17:14,890 --> 00:17:15,970
THAT'S SOME GREAT LUCK.
715
00:17:15,990 --> 00:17:17,230
>> Rick: COME ON, MORTY.
716
00:17:17,250 --> 00:17:18,430
LUCK HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT.
717
00:17:18,450 --> 00:17:19,170
I'M GREAT.
718
00:17:19,190 --> 00:17:21,770
THAT'S THE REAL REASON.
719
00:17:21,790 --> 00:17:22,700
NOW, MORTY, WHAT DO YOU SAY,
720
00:17:22,720 --> 00:17:23,430
BUDDY?
721
00:17:23,450 --> 00:17:25,000
WILL YOU HAND ME A SCREWDRIVER
722
00:17:25,020 --> 00:17:26,069
SO I CAN FINISH MY IONIC DIS
723
00:17:26,089 --> 00:17:27,069
DEFIBULIZER?
724
00:17:27,089 --> 00:17:28,230
>> Morty: SURE THING, RICK.
725
00:17:28,250 --> 00:17:29,370
HERE'S A SCREWDRIVER.
726
00:17:29,390 --> 00:17:30,730
>> Rick: ALL RIGHT, MORTY.
727
00:17:30,750 --> 00:17:31,970
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
728
00:17:31,990 --> 00:17:34,100
WE GOT ONE SCREW TURN...AND TWO
729
00:17:34,120 --> 00:17:35,870
SCREW TURNS...AND...
730
00:17:40,950 --> 00:17:42,430
ALL RIGHT, MORTY, HERE WE ARE.
731
00:17:42,450 --> 00:17:43,770
>> Morty: OH, MY GOD, RICK!
732
00:17:43,790 --> 00:17:44,870
IS THAT US?!
733
00:17:44,890 --> 00:17:45,970
W-W-W-WE'RE DEAD!
734
00:17:45,990 --> 00:17:46,800
WHAT IS GOING ON, RICK?
735
00:17:46,820 --> 00:17:47,730
I'M FREAKING OUT!
736
00:17:47,750 --> 00:17:48,800
>> Rick: CALM DOWN, MORTY!
737
00:17:48,820 --> 00:17:49,929
LOOK AT ME! CALM DOWN, MORTY!
738
00:17:49,950 --> 00:17:50,670
>> Morty: NO, I CAN'T DEAL WITH
739
00:17:50,690 --> 00:17:51,400
THIS!
740
00:17:51,420 --> 00:17:52,470
>> Rick: CALM YOURSELF, MORTY.
741
00:17:52,490 --> 00:17:53,430
>> Morty: I CAN'T DEAL WITH
742
00:17:53,450 --> 00:17:54,070
THIS, RICK!
743
00:17:54,090 --> 00:17:55,129
>> Rick: CALM DOWN, MORTY.
744
00:17:55,150 --> 00:17:56,200
>> Morty: THIS CAN'T BE REAL!
745
00:17:56,220 --> 00:17:56,900
>> Rick: YOU GOT TO CALM DOWN,
746
00:17:56,920 --> 00:17:57,830
MORTY.
747
00:17:57,850 --> 00:17:58,429
>> Morty: W-W-W-W-WE'RE RIPPED
748
00:17:58,450 --> 00:17:59,170
APART!
749
00:17:59,190 --> 00:17:59,730
>> Rick: SHUT UP AND LISTEN TO
750
00:17:59,750 --> 00:18:00,870
ME!
751
00:18:00,890 --> 00:18:02,200
IT'S FINE. EVERYTHING IS FINE.
752
00:18:02,220 --> 00:18:03,400
THERE'S AN INFINITE NUMBER OF
753
00:18:03,420 --> 00:18:04,900
REALITIES, MORTY, AND IN A FEW
754
00:18:04,920 --> 00:18:06,070
DOZEN OF THOSE, I GOT LUCKY AND
755
00:18:06,090 --> 00:18:06,830
TURNED EVERYTHING BACK TO
756
00:18:06,850 --> 00:18:07,800
NORMAL.
757
00:18:07,820 --> 00:18:08,970
I JUST HAD TO FIND ONE OF THOSE
758
00:18:08,990 --> 00:18:10,170
REALITIES IN WHICH WE ALSO
759
00:18:10,190 --> 00:18:11,000
HAPPEN TO BOTH DIE AROUND THIS
760
00:18:11,020 --> 00:18:11,930
TIME.
761
00:18:11,950 --> 00:18:13,300
NOW WE CAN JUST SLIP INTO THE
762
00:18:13,320 --> 00:18:14,870
PLACE OF OUR DEAD SELVES IN THIS
763
00:18:14,890 --> 00:18:15,830
REALITY AND EVERYTHING WILL BE
764
00:18:15,850 --> 00:18:16,700
FINE.
765
00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:17,500
WE'RE NOT SKIPPING A BEAT,
766
00:18:17,520 --> 00:18:18,270
MORTY.
767
00:18:18,290 --> 00:18:19,270
NOW, HELP ME WITH THESE BODIES.
768
00:18:19,290 --> 00:18:20,330
>> Morty: THIS IS INSANE.
769
00:18:20,350 --> 00:18:21,430
>> Rick: LOOK, MORTY, I'LL GRAB
770
00:18:21,450 --> 00:18:22,770
MYSELF, YOU GRAB YOURSELF, OKAY?
771
00:18:22,790 --> 00:18:23,970
I MEAN, T-T-T-THAT SEEMS FAIR TO
772
00:18:23,990 --> 00:18:25,030
ME I MEAN, THAT SEEMS LIKE A
773
00:18:25,050 --> 00:18:26,129
FAIR WAY TO DIVVY IT UP.
774
00:18:26,150 --> 00:18:27,170
>> Morty: RICK, WHAT ABOUT THE
775
00:18:27,190 --> 00:18:28,270
REALITY WE LEFT BEHIND?
776
00:18:28,290 --> 00:18:29,370
>> Rick: WHAT ABOUT THE REALITY
777
00:18:29,390 --> 00:18:30,070
WHERE HITLER CURED CANCER,
778
00:18:30,090 --> 00:18:31,000
MORTY?
779
00:18:31,020 --> 00:18:31,730
THE ANSWER IS DON'T THINK ABOUT
780
00:18:31,750 --> 00:18:32,470
IT.
781
00:18:32,490 --> 00:18:33,670
IT'S NOT LIKE WE CAN DO THIS
782
00:18:33,690 --> 00:18:34,700
EVERY WEEK, ANYWAYS.
783
00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:35,570
WE GET THREE OR FOUR MORE OF
784
00:18:35,590 --> 00:18:36,370
THESE, TOPS.
785
00:18:36,390 --> 00:18:37,400
NOW, PICK UP YOUR DEAD SELF AND
786
00:18:37,420 --> 00:18:37,930
COME ON.
787
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:39,230
HASTE MAKES WASTE.
788
00:18:39,250 --> 00:18:40,430
I-I-I DON'T SUPPOSE YOU'VE
789
00:18:40,450 --> 00:18:41,830
CONSIDERED THIS DETAIL, BUT
790
00:18:41,850 --> 00:18:43,200
OBVIOUSLY, IF I HADN'T SCREWED
791
00:18:43,220 --> 00:18:44,800
UP AS MUCH AS I DID, WE'D BE
792
00:18:44,820 --> 00:18:46,000
THESE GUYS RIGHT NOW, SO, AGAIN,
793
00:18:46,020 --> 00:18:47,530
YOU'RE WELCOME.
794
00:18:51,250 --> 00:18:54,630
>> ♪
♪ LOOK ON DOWN FROM THE
795
00:18:54,650 --> 00:18:58,170
BRIDGE ♪
♪
796
00:18:58,190 --> 00:19:03,470
♪
♪ THERE'S STILL FOUNTAINS DOWN
797
00:19:03,490 --> 00:19:08,270
THERE ♪
♪
798
00:19:08,290 --> 00:19:14,100
♪
♪ LOOK ON DOWN FROM THE BRIDGE ♪
♪
799
00:19:14,120 --> 00:19:24,030
♪
♪ IT'S STILL RAINING UP HERE ♪
♪
800
00:19:24,050 --> 00:19:28,200
♪
♪ EVERYBODY SEEMS SO FAR AWAY
801
00:19:28,220 --> 00:19:31,900
FROM ME ♪
♪
802
00:19:31,920 --> 00:19:36,700
♪
♪ EVERYBODY JUST WANTS TO BE
803
00:19:36,720 --> 00:19:39,770
FREE ♪
♪
804
00:19:39,790 --> 00:19:45,800
♪
♪ LOOK AWAY FROM THE SKY ♪
♪
805
00:19:45,820 --> 00:19:49,700
♪
♪ IT'S NO DIFFERENT WHEN YOU'RE
806
00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:51,830
LEAVING HOME ♪
♪
807
00:19:54,590 --> 00:19:59,070
♪
♪ I CAN'T BE THE SAME THING TO
808
00:19:59,090 --> 00:20:01,270
YOU NOW ♪
♪
809
00:20:01,290 --> 00:20:05,200
♪
♪ I'M JUST GONE ♪
♪
810
00:20:05,220 --> 00:20:11,130
♪
♪ JUST GONE ♪
♪
811
00:20:11,150 --> 00:20:19,130
♪
♪ HOW COULD I SAY GOODBYE? ♪
♪
812
00:20:19,150 --> 00:20:22,670
♪
♪ HOW COULD I SAY GOODBYE? ♪
♪
813
00:20:23,320 --> 00:20:25,230
>> Summer: YOU KNOW, THE THING
814
00:20:25,250 --> 00:20:26,930
ABOUT A SHARK...
815
00:20:26,950 --> 00:20:29,530
HE'S GOT LIFELESS EYES...
816
00:20:29,550 --> 00:20:31,530
BLACK EYES, LIKE A DOLL'S EYES.
817
00:20:31,550 --> 00:20:33,230
WHEN HE COMES AT YA, HE DOESN'T
818
00:20:33,250 --> 00:20:34,930
SEEM TO BE LIVING UNTIL HE BITES
819
00:20:34,950 --> 00:20:36,400
YA, AND THEN THE THE BLOOD,
820
00:20:36,420 --> 00:20:37,870
AND THE RED, AND THE WATER...
821
00:20:37,890 --> 00:20:39,130
>> Jerry: [ SIGHS ]
822
00:20:39,150 --> 00:20:40,030
YOU EVER WONDER WHAT HAPPENED TO
823
00:20:40,050 --> 00:20:41,169
RICK AND MORTY?
824
00:20:41,190 --> 00:20:42,800
>> Beth: SOMETIMES.
825
00:20:42,820 --> 00:20:44,300
BUT, I'M ASHAMED TO ADMIT, NOW
826
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:46,600
THAT THEY'RE GONE, I'M FINALLY
827
00:20:46,620 --> 00:20:49,370
HAPPY.
828
00:20:49,390 --> 00:20:50,500
>> Rick: HERE WE ARE,
829
00:20:50,520 --> 00:20:52,000
CRONENBERG MORTY A REALITY
830
00:20:52,020 --> 00:20:53,200
WHERE EVERYONE IN THE WORLD GOT
831
00:20:53,220 --> 00:20:54,230
GENETICALLY CRONENBERGED.
832
00:20:54,250 --> 00:20:55,170
WE'LL FIT RIGHT IN,
833
00:20:55,190 --> 00:20:56,270
CRONENBERG MORTY.
834
00:20:56,290 --> 00:20:57,270
IT'LL BE LIKE WE NEVER EVEN LEFT
835
00:20:57,290 --> 00:20:58,330
CRONENBERG WORLD.
836
00:20:58,350 --> 00:20:59,730
>> Morty: YEAH, CRONENBERG RICK,
837
00:20:59,750 --> 00:21:00,830
BUT, YOU KNOW, I'M GONNA MISS
838
00:21:00,850 --> 00:21:01,930
CRONENBERG WORLD, BECAUSE
839
00:21:01,950 --> 00:21:02,970
EVERYONE WAS CRONENBERGED ALL
840
00:21:02,990 --> 00:21:03,900
ALONG LIKE US FROM THE
841
00:21:03,920 --> 00:21:04,900
BEGINNING, YOU KNOW?
842
00:21:04,920 --> 00:21:06,130
I MEAN, I-I WISH WE HADN'T
843
00:21:06,150 --> 00:21:07,400
GENETICALLY RUINED CRONENBERG
844
00:21:07,420 --> 00:21:08,900
WORLD BEYOND REPAIR LIKE WE DID,
845
00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:10,200
YOU KNOW, AND TURNED EVERYONE
846
00:21:10,220 --> 00:21:11,270
INTO REGULAR, NORMAL PEOPLE JUST
847
00:21:11,290 --> 00:21:12,330
WALKING AROUND.
848
00:21:12,350 --> 00:21:13,630
>> Rick: DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT
849
00:21:13,650 --> 00:21:14,570
THAT SORT OF THING,
850
00:21:14,590 --> 00:21:15,530
CRONENBERG MORTY.
851
00:21:15,550 --> 00:21:16,600
LET'S GO MAKE OURSELVES AT HOME,
852
00:21:16,620 --> 00:21:20,630
HUH?
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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