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1
00:00:00,439 --> 00:00:02,466
I'm really glad I
tried being with a girl.
2
00:00:02,467 --> 00:00:04,033
It was such an enlightening
experience for me,
3
00:00:04,068 --> 00:00:06,135
you know, sexually and spiritually.
4
00:00:06,171 --> 00:00:08,103
I feel like I learned a lot about myself.
5
00:00:08,139 --> 00:00:09,238
What did you learn?
6
00:00:09,274 --> 00:00:11,541
I like a dick. I do.
7
00:00:11,576 --> 00:00:12,575
I... you know, it was great
8
00:00:12,610 --> 00:00:13,876
when she was going down on me,
9
00:00:13,911 --> 00:00:15,211
but you're already so good at that,
10
00:00:15,246 --> 00:00:16,712
that at a certain point, I was like,
11
00:00:16,747 --> 00:00:17,713
"Okay, penis please."
12
00:00:17,748 --> 00:00:19,815
But her kissing, wow.
13
00:00:19,850 --> 00:00:21,150
She was a revelation.
14
00:00:21,185 --> 00:00:22,918
- Revelation?
- Oh, yeah.
15
00:00:22,953 --> 00:00:24,519
It was a whole other level.
16
00:00:24,555 --> 00:00:26,488
Other level different? Higher?
17
00:00:26,523 --> 00:00:27,489
Oh, God, way higher.
18
00:00:27,524 --> 00:00:28,991
She knows what girls like.
19
00:00:29,026 --> 00:00:30,659
Or at least she
knows what this girl likes.
20
00:00:30,695 --> 00:00:32,027
Jeez, why didn't you
tell me how bad I was?
21
00:00:32,063 --> 00:00:33,528
No, you're not bad.
22
00:00:33,564 --> 00:00:35,029
It's just she's insanely good.
23
00:00:35,065 --> 00:00:36,265
Well, that's totally unfair,
24
00:00:36,300 --> 00:00:37,432
'cause she's got gorgeous lips.
25
00:00:37,467 --> 00:00:38,766
I got thin lips.
26
00:00:38,802 --> 00:00:40,335
God, she does have gorgeous lips.
27
00:00:40,370 --> 00:00:41,703
They're like soft,
juicy, luscious pillows.
28
00:00:41,738 --> 00:00:43,471
Christ, I got to start using Chapstick.
29
00:00:43,507 --> 00:00:46,341
Babe, babe, this is an
area you can't compete on.
30
00:00:46,376 --> 00:00:48,876
She is a gorgeous girl who
kisses other gorgeous girls
31
00:00:48,912 --> 00:00:51,478
all the time, she's like
the gorgeous girl whisperer.
32
00:00:51,514 --> 00:00:53,414
Well, I want to be the
best kisser you ever had.
33
00:00:53,449 --> 00:00:55,083
Oh.
34
00:00:55,118 --> 00:00:56,884
I want to start kissing
you like a lesbian lover.
35
00:00:56,920 --> 00:00:58,385
Ew!
36
00:00:58,421 --> 00:00:59,687
Well, I thought that's what you want.
37
00:00:59,723 --> 00:01:01,655
No, I want you to kiss like a guy
38
00:01:01,691 --> 00:01:03,524
who learned how to kiss like a lesbian.
39
00:01:03,559 --> 00:01:05,326
Jesus Christ, how am I gonna do that?
40
00:01:05,361 --> 00:01:07,261
I'll take mental notes the
next few times I kiss Davvy.
41
00:01:07,296 --> 00:01:08,696
We're gonna pretend to
be a lesbian couple
42
00:01:08,731 --> 00:01:10,197
- for a little while.
- Why?
43
00:01:10,233 --> 00:01:12,333
Because she has 47,000
followers on Instagram.
44
00:01:12,368 --> 00:01:13,367
That's why.
45
00:01:13,402 --> 00:01:14,368
I want waffles.
46
00:01:14,403 --> 00:01:15,469
You want waffles?
47
00:01:15,504 --> 00:01:16,837
Please take me.
48
00:01:19,542 --> 00:01:22,275
♪ Sex and drugs and rock and roll ♪
49
00:01:22,310 --> 00:01:23,343
♪ All right ♪
50
00:01:24,512 --> 00:01:26,146
♪ All right ♪
51
00:01:26,181 --> 00:01:28,514
♪ 'Cause I don't want to die ♪
52
00:01:28,550 --> 00:01:30,183
♪ Anonymous ♪
53
00:01:30,219 --> 00:01:31,684
♪ No, no ♪
54
00:01:31,720 --> 00:01:33,586
♪ No, no ♪
55
00:01:33,622 --> 00:01:35,856
♪ No, no ♪
56
00:01:37,529 --> 00:01:40,575
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
57
00:01:46,104 --> 00:01:48,286
_
58
00:02:03,084 --> 00:02:06,218
♪ We ♪
59
00:02:06,254 --> 00:02:08,087
♪ Never got control ♪
60
00:02:08,122 --> 00:02:10,256
♪ Lost the whole damn world ♪
61
00:02:10,291 --> 00:02:13,392
♪ Life ♪
62
00:02:13,427 --> 00:02:15,860
♪ Like a paradise ♪
63
00:02:15,896 --> 00:02:19,898
♪ It's just a paradise ♪
64
00:02:19,944 --> 00:02:22,866
_
65
00:02:22,867 --> 00:02:25,837
♪ Visions, visions fading fast ♪
66
00:02:25,872 --> 00:02:29,207
♪ Crystals, crystals that never last ♪
67
00:02:29,242 --> 00:02:32,043
♪ Hello ♪
68
00:02:32,078 --> 00:02:34,412
♪ Who's this? ♪
69
00:02:34,447 --> 00:02:36,580
♪ Don't even worry about it ♪
70
00:02:36,616 --> 00:02:39,284
♪ I'll set up then I'll fail ♪
71
00:02:39,319 --> 00:02:42,620
♪ Mountains, crystals, that never last ♪
72
00:02:42,655 --> 00:02:44,789
♪ I need to know ♪
73
00:02:44,824 --> 00:02:48,258
♪ How you got this number ♪
74
00:02:48,294 --> 00:02:50,628
♪ I got it from a friend of a friend ♪
75
00:02:50,663 --> 00:02:53,130
♪ Of a friend of a friend of a friend ♪
76
00:02:53,165 --> 00:02:55,999
♪ Of a friend, a friend of a friend ♪
77
00:02:56,035 --> 00:03:02,505
♪ I need to hang up, I'm so sorry ♪
78
00:03:02,541 --> 00:03:05,709
♪ Hello ♪
79
00:03:05,744 --> 00:03:10,413
♪ Bye-bye ♪
80
00:03:10,449 --> 00:03:13,050
[chuckles] That was really good.
81
00:03:13,085 --> 00:03:15,485
You want me to ask
Davvy for oral sex advice.
82
00:03:15,520 --> 00:03:17,887
Gigi said she's amazing, like,
the queen of cunnilingus.
83
00:03:17,922 --> 00:03:19,222
Okay, honey, I don't
think you should be
84
00:03:19,257 --> 00:03:21,057
talking to Gigi about
stuff like that, okay?
85
00:03:21,092 --> 00:03:23,125
That's not a normal
mother-daughter area.
86
00:03:23,161 --> 00:03:24,794
We're not a normal
mother-daughter, John.
87
00:03:24,830 --> 00:03:26,329
We have a very healthy relationship.
88
00:03:26,365 --> 00:03:28,064
She brought up the area.
89
00:03:28,099 --> 00:03:29,065
I made a mental note.
90
00:03:29,100 --> 00:03:30,132
Okay, but meanwhile,
91
00:03:30,168 --> 00:03:31,668
Davvy's still fake dating Gigi.
92
00:03:31,703 --> 00:03:33,002
I don't want to be in
the kind of relationship
93
00:03:33,037 --> 00:03:34,337
where my real daughter finds out
94
00:03:34,372 --> 00:03:36,239
from her surrogate
mom that her actual dad
95
00:03:36,274 --> 00:03:38,174
is lousy in bed.
96
00:03:38,209 --> 00:03:39,408
Did that even make sense?
97
00:03:39,443 --> 00:03:40,843
Yes. Unfortunately, it did.
98
00:03:40,879 --> 00:03:42,378
And you are not lousy in bed.
99
00:03:42,413 --> 00:03:44,680
You just need a little
help, like most guys do.
100
00:03:44,715 --> 00:03:46,682
So what, I've been doing it wrong
101
00:03:46,717 --> 00:03:48,184
the last, like, 25 years?
102
00:03:48,219 --> 00:03:49,485
Oh, not the whole time.
103
00:03:49,520 --> 00:03:50,619
What does that mean?
104
00:03:50,654 --> 00:03:52,821
And you're always very...
105
00:03:52,857 --> 00:03:54,656
What?
106
00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:56,358
- Eager.
- Oh, my God.
107
00:03:56,394 --> 00:03:57,893
And sometimes, you wander into
108
00:03:57,928 --> 00:03:59,628
some really great zones and rhythms
109
00:03:59,663 --> 00:04:01,063
- that really get me off.
- Holy shit.
110
00:04:01,098 --> 00:04:02,931
Why not take the chance to sit down
111
00:04:02,966 --> 00:04:04,600
and learn something new that would make
112
00:04:04,635 --> 00:04:07,936
me orgasm every time?
113
00:04:07,971 --> 00:04:10,671
Well, first of all, because
it's embarrassing
114
00:04:10,707 --> 00:04:13,408
to be asking people, you know,
115
00:04:13,443 --> 00:04:16,144
"Teach me how to give head, please."
116
00:04:19,082 --> 00:04:21,716
You could ask Flash.
117
00:04:21,751 --> 00:04:23,718
And why would I ask Flash?
118
00:04:23,753 --> 00:04:25,052
Oh, my God. Don't tell me.
119
00:04:25,087 --> 00:04:26,554
He's great at it, right?
120
00:04:26,589 --> 00:04:27,955
Okay. I won't tell you.
121
00:04:27,990 --> 00:04:29,524
Ugh, classic. Of course, of course.
122
00:04:29,559 --> 00:04:31,058
He's the king of cunnilingus,
123
00:04:31,093 --> 00:04:33,327
and I'm Johnny the
eager little eighth grader.
124
00:04:33,362 --> 00:04:35,530
[groans] It is not a competition.
125
00:04:35,565 --> 00:04:37,131
You are good at kissing.
126
00:04:37,166 --> 00:04:38,666
He's good at oral sex.
127
00:04:38,701 --> 00:04:40,234
It's a tie, okay?
128
00:04:40,269 --> 00:04:41,868
But there's no
question there's definitely
129
00:04:41,904 --> 00:04:45,472
more prestige in the oral sex area.
130
00:04:45,507 --> 00:04:47,207
Honey, honey, tell you what.
131
00:04:47,243 --> 00:04:48,442
Listen.
132
00:04:48,477 --> 00:04:49,743
Let me make you come right now, okay?
133
00:04:49,778 --> 00:04:51,178
I'm... no, listen to me.
134
00:04:51,213 --> 00:04:52,446
I'm totally pumped. I'm really psyched.
135
00:04:52,481 --> 00:04:54,381
I'm completely in the zone.
136
00:04:54,417 --> 00:04:57,751
I can make this happen right now.
137
00:04:57,786 --> 00:05:01,287
Too eager, I know, sorry, shit.
138
00:05:01,323 --> 00:05:03,022
I'm gonna talk to Davvy, okay?
139
00:05:03,058 --> 00:05:04,891
Make sure she
doesn't say anything to Gigi,
140
00:05:04,927 --> 00:05:06,326
and then you are gonna sit down with her
141
00:05:06,361 --> 00:05:08,361
and get some very important information
142
00:05:08,396 --> 00:05:13,499
that we are gonna put to
great use immediately.
143
00:05:13,534 --> 00:05:15,734
Do it for me.
144
00:05:15,770 --> 00:05:18,304
Do it for us.
145
00:05:18,340 --> 00:05:20,206
Please.
146
00:05:20,241 --> 00:05:22,008
All right.
147
00:05:22,043 --> 00:05:25,411
Ugh.
148
00:05:25,447 --> 00:05:26,946
You know what? Maybe...
149
00:05:26,982 --> 00:05:28,614
I just... I'm gonna do
some deep research online.
150
00:05:28,649 --> 00:05:31,722
Because that way
it'll just stay secret, hon.
151
00:05:34,419 --> 00:05:35,905
You afraid of change.
152
00:05:35,906 --> 00:05:37,233
- I'm afraid of change?
- Yeah.
153
00:05:37,234 --> 00:05:38,968
You chickened out on
the whole lesbian thing.
154
00:05:38,969 --> 00:05:40,101
I didn't chicken out.
155
00:05:40,102 --> 00:05:42,371
I turned into a lesbian,
and then I turned back.
156
00:05:42,407 --> 00:05:44,674
That's two changes in
less than 24 hours.
157
00:05:44,709 --> 00:05:46,509
Plus, I tried a new skin cream today,
158
00:05:46,545 --> 00:05:47,677
so that's actually three.
159
00:05:47,712 --> 00:05:49,245
- Right.
- I want a change.
160
00:05:49,280 --> 00:05:50,679
I want a passion.
161
00:05:50,714 --> 00:05:52,181
I want something that
consumes me, you know?
162
00:05:52,216 --> 00:05:53,682
What do you mean?
163
00:05:53,717 --> 00:05:54,917
You should dance. You
should be a dance teacher.
164
00:05:54,952 --> 00:05:56,519
Oh. I'd...
165
00:05:56,554 --> 00:05:58,120
- You love to dance!
- That's a great idea!
166
00:05:58,156 --> 00:05:59,388
Yeah, but you know what,
I don't think you can just
167
00:05:59,424 --> 00:06:00,822
become a dance teacher, honey.
168
00:06:00,858 --> 00:06:02,024
I think you got to get, like, certified.
169
00:06:02,060 --> 00:06:03,492
John, I went to school for dance.
170
00:06:03,528 --> 00:06:04,893
I trained as a dancer.
I was gonna be a dancer
171
00:06:04,929 --> 00:06:06,395
until I met you, and I
am goddamn good at it.
172
00:06:06,431 --> 00:06:07,829
- And you know what?
- Hmm?
173
00:06:07,865 --> 00:06:09,631
Will you kill me? I really want sushi.
174
00:06:09,667 --> 00:06:10,966
- No, we don't need waffles.
- Okay, yeah.
175
00:06:11,001 --> 00:06:12,734
The waffle place is...
176
00:06:12,770 --> 00:06:14,736
I just want something
big in my life, you know?
177
00:06:14,772 --> 00:06:16,404
Like I made a difference.
178
00:06:16,440 --> 00:06:17,906
Like Habitat for Humanity?
179
00:06:17,942 --> 00:06:19,702
No, not a difference
in the world at large,
180
00:06:19,710 --> 00:06:21,376
a difference in my world.
181
00:06:21,411 --> 00:06:23,411
I blew my chance saving the planet
182
00:06:23,447 --> 00:06:25,080
'cause I was too
busy blowing your father
183
00:06:25,115 --> 00:06:26,714
literally and emotionally,
184
00:06:26,749 --> 00:06:28,416
always putting his dreams out in front.
185
00:06:28,452 --> 00:06:29,884
Okay, let's be honest.
186
00:06:29,919 --> 00:06:31,386
It's always been kind
of a two-way street,
187
00:06:31,421 --> 00:06:32,853
like mutual support kind of thing.
188
00:06:32,889 --> 00:06:35,457
Oh, really? Mutual two-way street thing
189
00:06:35,492 --> 00:06:37,292
going on, you mean where
you were out in front
190
00:06:37,294 --> 00:06:39,214
being the star in the
spotlight, and I was shoved
191
00:06:39,229 --> 00:06:41,028
in the back, like, barely lit?
192
00:06:41,064 --> 00:06:43,864
No, honey, this has been
a one-way street, okay?
193
00:06:43,900 --> 00:06:45,466
Me driving you.
194
00:06:45,501 --> 00:06:47,034
You're a 50-year-old man
195
00:06:47,070 --> 00:06:49,470
who still acts like a 15-year-old boy,
196
00:06:49,505 --> 00:06:53,407
and I'm a 45-year-old
woman who acts...
197
00:06:53,442 --> 00:06:55,309
Like a 45-year-old woman.
198
00:06:55,344 --> 00:06:56,643
Okay.
199
00:06:56,678 --> 00:06:57,911
- Honey?
- Oh, my God.
200
00:06:57,946 --> 00:06:59,546
- Let's relax.
- No, no, no, no, no.
201
00:06:59,582 --> 00:07:01,102
If you think about it, when we talked
202
00:07:01,117 --> 00:07:03,350
about you being the lead
singer or just going out
203
00:07:03,385 --> 00:07:04,985
like that one gig where you had to sing,
204
00:07:04,987 --> 00:07:06,953
like, three songs in a row, you
had massive panic attacks.
205
00:07:06,989 --> 00:07:08,589
I know, I know. John, I know, okay?
206
00:07:08,624 --> 00:07:10,957
I know, I just... I wanted...
I wanted something
207
00:07:10,993 --> 00:07:12,273
different for my life, you know?
208
00:07:12,294 --> 00:07:13,693
That's all I'm saying.
209
00:07:13,729 --> 00:07:15,729
I thought everything was
gonna be different.
210
00:07:15,764 --> 00:07:17,263
You're okay.
211
00:07:17,298 --> 00:07:18,732
It's okay.
212
00:07:18,767 --> 00:07:19,866
You want waffles?
213
00:07:19,901 --> 00:07:21,400
Yes, waffles. Let's go.
214
00:07:21,436 --> 00:07:23,569
But, guys, the sushi
joint is right here.
215
00:07:23,605 --> 00:07:24,971
Oh, my God, John, this is exactly
216
00:07:25,007 --> 00:07:26,305
what we're talking about, okay?
217
00:07:26,341 --> 00:07:29,808
You never want to try anything new.
218
00:07:29,844 --> 00:07:31,043
Thanks for doing this, Davvy.
219
00:07:31,078 --> 00:07:32,311
I really appreciate it.
220
00:07:32,347 --> 00:07:33,779
Well, I believe in pussy karma.
221
00:07:33,814 --> 00:07:35,648
You get great head by putting great head
222
00:07:35,683 --> 00:07:37,650
out into the oral sex universe.
223
00:07:37,685 --> 00:07:39,152
Plus, my pottery class was canceled.
224
00:07:39,187 --> 00:07:42,255
So here we are.
225
00:07:42,290 --> 00:07:44,290
Wow, that's the most realistic drawing
226
00:07:44,325 --> 00:07:45,858
of a vagina I've ever seen in my life.
227
00:07:45,893 --> 00:07:47,693
- Thank you.
- Oh, you drew it?
228
00:07:47,728 --> 00:07:48,761
An ex of mine did.
229
00:07:48,796 --> 00:07:49,762
She's an artist.
230
00:07:49,797 --> 00:07:50,829
But it's my vagina.
231
00:07:50,865 --> 00:07:52,297
Oh.
232
00:07:52,332 --> 00:07:54,633
Well, it's...
233
00:07:54,669 --> 00:07:55,834
magnificent.
234
00:07:55,870 --> 00:07:57,202
It's a good pussy. I know.
235
00:07:57,237 --> 00:07:59,204
- I'm blessed.
- Yeah.
236
00:07:59,239 --> 00:08:00,739
Yeah.
237
00:08:00,775 --> 00:08:05,043
So why am I staring at
a drawing of your pussy?
238
00:08:05,078 --> 00:08:06,611
Listen, you're a race car driver,
239
00:08:06,647 --> 00:08:08,146
you want to know an
engine inside and out,
240
00:08:08,182 --> 00:08:09,947
- what makes it run best, right?
- Right.
241
00:08:09,983 --> 00:08:12,484
And every engine's the
same, but also individual,
242
00:08:12,519 --> 00:08:14,619
just like vaginas.
243
00:08:14,655 --> 00:08:16,454
So you might have a
little extra size here,
244
00:08:16,490 --> 00:08:19,190
a little less action
there, but basically,
245
00:08:19,225 --> 00:08:20,591
each pussy has all the same parts.
246
00:08:20,626 --> 00:08:21,993
Right, but you know I, uh...
247
00:08:22,028 --> 00:08:23,427
I've been in several
notable New York City
248
00:08:23,462 --> 00:08:24,929
rock bands over the years.
249
00:08:24,964 --> 00:08:26,597
I've slept with a lot of
chicks, so, you know...
250
00:08:26,632 --> 00:08:28,866
Sure, yeah, but, you know,
just because you're fat,
251
00:08:28,902 --> 00:08:31,969
doesn't make you a chef, hmm?
252
00:08:32,005 --> 00:08:33,365
Let me ask you a couple questions.
253
00:08:33,372 --> 00:08:34,872
Can I ask one question before you start?
254
00:08:34,908 --> 00:08:36,207
Sure.
255
00:08:36,242 --> 00:08:40,344
Is, uh... is that part on every girl?
256
00:08:40,379 --> 00:08:42,179
This is gonna take
longer than I thought.
257
00:08:52,091 --> 00:08:53,824
Mm-mm, no.
258
00:08:53,859 --> 00:08:55,491
No, I'm sorry. No.
259
00:08:55,527 --> 00:08:57,060
That's what I was telling you about.
260
00:08:57,096 --> 00:08:59,029
It's too much tongue way too early.
261
00:08:59,064 --> 00:09:00,530
Too much tongue, okay.
262
00:09:00,565 --> 00:09:01,798
It's okay, relax.
263
00:09:01,834 --> 00:09:03,100
There's no rush.
264
00:09:03,135 --> 00:09:04,500
Just... you know the
amount of time you take
265
00:09:04,536 --> 00:09:05,769
when you're going down on me?
266
00:09:05,804 --> 00:09:06,837
- Yes.
- Okay.
267
00:09:06,872 --> 00:09:08,138
So it's like the same thing.
268
00:09:08,173 --> 00:09:09,839
You know, just nice and easy.
269
00:09:09,874 --> 00:09:11,708
Soft and slow.
270
00:09:11,743 --> 00:09:13,376
- Okay?
- Okay.
271
00:09:13,411 --> 00:09:14,844
Okay.
272
00:09:18,049 --> 00:09:19,549
What are you doing?
273
00:09:19,584 --> 00:09:20,816
I don't know.
274
00:09:20,852 --> 00:09:24,387
I feel like I'm kissing a statue.
275
00:09:24,422 --> 00:09:26,021
Goddamn you, Flash!
276
00:09:26,057 --> 00:09:28,224
- It's fine.
- It's not fine.
277
00:09:28,259 --> 00:09:29,725
Look, I think you're
overthinking it now.
278
00:09:29,761 --> 00:09:31,426
Why don't we just... let's just fuck,
279
00:09:31,462 --> 00:09:33,162
and let's just
forget about kissing, okay?
280
00:09:33,197 --> 00:09:35,117
- No more kissing.
- Well, that ain't gonna happen.
281
00:09:35,133 --> 00:09:36,453
'Cause I'm hung up on the kissing,
282
00:09:36,467 --> 00:09:39,034
and so is Magic Johnson.
283
00:09:39,070 --> 00:09:40,369
Really?
284
00:09:40,404 --> 00:09:41,670
So unfair.
285
00:09:41,705 --> 00:09:42,671
I just want to kiss you like her.
286
00:09:42,706 --> 00:09:44,339
Why can't I learn?
287
00:09:44,375 --> 00:09:47,942
Well, I love how emotionally available
288
00:09:47,978 --> 00:09:49,278
you are right now.
289
00:09:49,313 --> 00:09:50,979
Well, I'm evolving, honey.
290
00:09:55,786 --> 00:09:56,985
Well, you may be evolving,
291
00:09:57,020 --> 00:09:58,887
but your dick is still
stuck in caveman mode.
292
00:09:58,922 --> 00:10:00,488
Thank God.
293
00:10:03,493 --> 00:10:05,226
Oh, yeah.
294
00:10:05,262 --> 00:10:07,996
- Oh, give me a kiss.
- Uh-uh!
295
00:10:08,031 --> 00:10:11,632
No kissing.
296
00:10:11,668 --> 00:10:13,296
Do it again.
297
00:10:17,607 --> 00:10:20,341
♪ Pour a little champagne,
bang, heart attack ♪
298
00:10:20,376 --> 00:10:22,677
♪ Trying to run for
you, can't catch us ♪
299
00:10:22,712 --> 00:10:25,946
♪ We'll never stop even if it kills us ♪
300
00:10:25,981 --> 00:10:28,449
♪ Caffeine, nicotine, sex, pills ♪
301
00:10:28,484 --> 00:10:30,951
♪ We do it for the thrills ♪
302
00:10:30,986 --> 00:10:33,353
♪ Try to run for you, can't catch us ♪
303
00:10:33,388 --> 00:10:36,456
♪ We'll never stop even if it kills us ♪
304
00:10:36,491 --> 00:10:39,059
♪ Alcohol, fireworks, dollar bills ♪
305
00:10:39,094 --> 00:10:41,862
♪ We do it for the thrills ♪
306
00:10:41,897 --> 00:10:44,397
♪ Sippin' till we high, sip,
sippin' till we high ♪
307
00:10:44,433 --> 00:10:46,800
♪ Sippin' till we high,
sip, sippin' till we high ♪
308
00:10:46,836 --> 00:10:49,235
♪ So I want to introduce
you to my best friend ♪
309
00:10:49,270 --> 00:10:52,539
♪ A-D-R-E-N-A-L-I-N-E adrenaline ♪
310
00:10:52,574 --> 00:10:53,906
Gigi and Johnny just
finished the lyrics.
311
00:10:53,942 --> 00:10:55,141
They want to do a full rehearsal.
312
00:10:55,176 --> 00:10:56,543
Okay, great, I'll get my bag.
313
00:10:56,578 --> 00:10:57,744
Why didn't you tell
me I was a bad kisser
314
00:10:57,779 --> 00:10:59,011
when you were seeing me?
315
00:10:59,047 --> 00:11:01,113
Uh, didn't have time?
316
00:11:01,149 --> 00:11:03,616
A whole goddamn year?
317
00:11:03,652 --> 00:11:05,284
Okay, you got to remember,
318
00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:07,053
I had just left Johnny Rock.
319
00:11:07,088 --> 00:11:09,355
Whose ego is so
delicate, you tell him his hair
320
00:11:09,390 --> 00:11:11,790
looks weird, and his
dick doesn't work for a week.
321
00:11:11,826 --> 00:11:13,625
I didn't want to take
the chance of saying
322
00:11:13,661 --> 00:11:15,194
the wrong thing to you and then having
323
00:11:15,230 --> 00:11:18,464
to spend the next seven
days reconvincing your cock.
324
00:11:18,499 --> 00:11:20,666
Besides, you gave such great head,
325
00:11:20,701 --> 00:11:22,167
I didn't care about the kissing.
326
00:11:22,202 --> 00:11:23,335
Thanks.
327
00:11:23,371 --> 00:11:25,036
Gigi's giving me notes,
328
00:11:25,072 --> 00:11:27,406
and every time she
wants to practice, I panic.
329
00:11:27,441 --> 00:11:29,074
Okay, well, you got
to figure that shit out,
330
00:11:29,109 --> 00:11:30,342
or she's gonna dump your ass.
331
00:11:30,378 --> 00:11:31,744
I know.
332
00:11:31,779 --> 00:11:33,111
This is about Gigi's happiness.
333
00:11:33,146 --> 00:11:36,014
I know.
334
00:11:36,049 --> 00:11:37,849
Do you want to practice on me?
335
00:11:37,885 --> 00:11:39,450
Huh?
336
00:11:39,486 --> 00:11:41,719
Well, I mean, who knows
your history of kissing
337
00:11:41,755 --> 00:11:43,721
better than I do?
338
00:11:43,757 --> 00:11:45,390
- Ava, come on.
- Purely clinical.
339
00:11:45,425 --> 00:11:47,926
Like a lab test.
340
00:11:47,961 --> 00:11:49,460
Oh, my God, you're making it weird.
341
00:11:49,496 --> 00:11:52,130
Just kiss me. Come here. Jesus.
342
00:11:52,165 --> 00:11:54,652
Okay, all right.
343
00:11:57,998 --> 00:12:00,132
- You ready?
- Yeah.
344
00:12:11,545 --> 00:12:14,980
Yeah. That's better.
345
00:12:15,015 --> 00:12:17,149
One note, okay?
346
00:12:17,184 --> 00:12:19,151
You need a dash of supple.
347
00:12:19,186 --> 00:12:21,119
You got to relax your
lower lip a little more.
348
00:12:21,155 --> 00:12:24,222
It's still too active.
349
00:12:24,257 --> 00:12:25,490
Okay. Try again?
350
00:12:25,525 --> 00:12:28,459
Yeah.
351
00:12:28,495 --> 00:12:30,228
- You ready?
- Yeah.
352
00:12:52,952 --> 00:12:56,120
[clears throat]
353
00:12:56,155 --> 00:12:58,388
Yeah, that... technically perfect.
354
00:12:58,424 --> 00:13:00,691
- Thanks.
- Mm-hmm, you're welcome.
355
00:13:03,862 --> 00:13:05,495
What are we supposed to be doing?
356
00:13:05,531 --> 00:13:07,497
- Kissing.
- Uh, no, rehearsal.
357
00:13:07,533 --> 00:13:08,898
That's right.
358
00:13:08,934 --> 00:13:11,201
We're going, um, to rehearsal.
359
00:13:11,237 --> 00:13:13,937
- Get my bag.
- Okay.
360
00:13:13,972 --> 00:13:15,405
I'll get my bag.
361
00:13:20,779 --> 00:13:23,512
Feast, you want to
call the show Feast.
362
00:13:23,548 --> 00:13:24,748
I know.
363
00:13:24,783 --> 00:13:25,782
Brilliant, right?
364
00:13:25,817 --> 00:13:27,250
Well, it's not brilliant.
365
00:13:27,285 --> 00:13:29,385
It's the exact opposite of Famine.
366
00:13:29,420 --> 00:13:31,420
It's tastefully ironic.
367
00:13:31,456 --> 00:13:32,688
I like it.
368
00:13:32,724 --> 00:13:34,790
- I love it.
- Of course you love it.
369
00:13:34,825 --> 00:13:36,425
It sounds like there's
going to be a buffet.
370
00:13:36,461 --> 00:13:37,860
That was mean.
371
00:13:37,895 --> 00:13:39,862
I love it because it's good.
372
00:13:39,897 --> 00:13:41,530
It's memorable. It's
got a great ring to it.
373
00:13:41,566 --> 00:13:42,865
That's why I like it.
374
00:13:42,900 --> 00:13:44,260
Thank you, and you guys are gonna
375
00:13:44,269 --> 00:13:45,701
need a title that invites the audience
376
00:13:45,737 --> 00:13:47,136
into the theater, right?
377
00:13:47,171 --> 00:13:49,104
Hey, who remembers
seeing Sting's musical,
378
00:13:49,140 --> 00:13:50,438
"The Last Ship"?
379
00:13:50,474 --> 00:13:51,673
- No.
- Never heard of it.
380
00:13:51,708 --> 00:13:53,175
Neither did anyone else.
381
00:13:53,210 --> 00:13:54,476
I mean, you guys want people to
382
00:13:54,511 --> 00:13:57,179
- come and see the show, correct?
- Yeah.
383
00:13:57,214 --> 00:13:59,054
I want the right people
to come see our show.
384
00:13:59,083 --> 00:14:00,949
Rehab, no one knows what
An Gorta Mor means.
385
00:14:00,985 --> 00:14:02,450
Irish people know.
386
00:14:02,486 --> 00:14:04,219
Educated people know.
387
00:14:04,255 --> 00:14:06,554
Okay, well, I asked
an Irish friend of mine
388
00:14:06,590 --> 00:14:07,922
who teaches at NYU.
389
00:14:07,957 --> 00:14:09,257
You know what he
thought An Gorta Mor was?
390
00:14:09,293 --> 00:14:10,525
A thyroid medication.
391
00:14:10,560 --> 00:14:12,260
What do they teach? Shop?
392
00:14:12,296 --> 00:14:14,596
The original title of
"Hamilton" was "Burr."
393
00:14:14,631 --> 00:14:16,230
Because it was so cold back then.
394
00:14:16,266 --> 00:14:18,300
No, Bam, no, because no one
395
00:14:18,335 --> 00:14:20,067
wanted to see a show about Aaron Burr.
396
00:14:20,103 --> 00:14:22,170
No one wants to see a
show about a fucking ship,
397
00:14:22,205 --> 00:14:24,172
and no one wants to look up words
398
00:14:24,207 --> 00:14:25,907
on a Gaelic-to-English online dictionary
399
00:14:25,942 --> 00:14:27,909
before they go buy a $200 ticket.
400
00:14:27,944 --> 00:14:30,511
We are trying to make a dark, edgy,
401
00:14:30,546 --> 00:14:33,815
real song cycle meets rock
opera production here.
402
00:14:33,850 --> 00:14:36,117
We want to make "Hamilton"
look like a puppet show.
403
00:14:36,152 --> 00:14:37,685
Right, but none of it matters
404
00:14:37,720 --> 00:14:40,321
unless you a get a full
house on opening night.
405
00:14:40,356 --> 00:14:42,856
I got you, as composer and creator,
406
00:14:42,891 --> 00:14:44,758
a 4% piece of the box office.
407
00:14:44,794 --> 00:14:47,127
That is unheard of for
someone in your position.
408
00:14:47,162 --> 00:14:49,996
But 4% of nothing is zero, Rehab.
409
00:14:50,032 --> 00:14:52,299
Think about it.
410
00:14:52,335 --> 00:14:54,267
Feast.
411
00:14:54,303 --> 00:14:55,636
Feast.
412
00:15:00,209 --> 00:15:03,243
Hmm.
413
00:15:03,278 --> 00:15:06,813
You know what you could call the show?
414
00:15:06,849 --> 00:15:08,982
Go fuck yourself.
415
00:15:09,017 --> 00:15:10,617
Noah, you are supposed
to be the new Jew,
416
00:15:10,652 --> 00:15:13,519
but instead you're
acting like the old Jew.
417
00:15:13,555 --> 00:15:16,956
And you are supposed
to be a creative genius
418
00:15:16,991 --> 00:15:20,660
sent here to help me
realize my vision on stage.
419
00:15:20,695 --> 00:15:23,195
But nope. No.
420
00:15:23,231 --> 00:15:27,767
Instead, you are two
typical show business Jews...
421
00:15:27,802 --> 00:15:30,069
you know what I mean... sent to ruin
422
00:15:30,104 --> 00:15:33,305
another Jew's musical endeavor.
423
00:15:33,341 --> 00:15:35,007
You know what? That's a
good name for this show.
424
00:15:35,042 --> 00:15:36,141
Jewsical.
425
00:15:36,177 --> 00:15:37,337
Oh, my God, stop saying Jew.
426
00:15:37,345 --> 00:15:38,345
You say Jew all the time.
427
00:15:38,379 --> 00:15:39,578
Stop saying Jew so much.
428
00:15:39,613 --> 00:15:44,083
Jew, Jew, Jew, Jew, Jew.
429
00:15:44,118 --> 00:15:46,150
Feast blows.
430
00:15:46,186 --> 00:15:48,353
Almost as much as the two of you.
431
00:15:48,389 --> 00:15:51,923
I've got something called artistic
integrity, my friends.
432
00:15:51,958 --> 00:15:53,925
Look that up online.
433
00:15:53,960 --> 00:15:55,827
Feast on this.
434
00:15:55,863 --> 00:15:58,162
- Now, just...
- Shut up!
435
00:15:58,198 --> 00:16:01,299
Feast was Campbell Scott's idea.
436
00:16:01,334 --> 00:16:03,201
Whoa, whoa, whoa, did
you say Campbell Scott?
437
00:16:03,236 --> 00:16:04,869
The Campbell Scott?
438
00:16:04,905 --> 00:16:06,871
He's from the royal
family of American theater.
439
00:16:06,907 --> 00:16:09,807
His father's George C. Scott, Patton.
440
00:16:09,842 --> 00:16:13,544
Rehab, this guy does Shakespeare, bro.
441
00:16:13,579 --> 00:16:16,214
Campbell Scott is the
real goddamn deal, right?
442
00:16:16,249 --> 00:16:19,082
That's great.
443
00:16:19,118 --> 00:16:21,685
You just heard your name
and Shakespeare's name
444
00:16:21,721 --> 00:16:22,920
in the same sentence.
445
00:16:22,955 --> 00:16:26,490
How often does that happen?
446
00:16:26,526 --> 00:16:28,759
Campbell Scott gives your production
447
00:16:28,795 --> 00:16:32,390
immediate and
legitimate artistic integrity.
448
00:16:38,070 --> 00:16:41,871
Do you still remember
December's foggy freeze,
449
00:16:41,907 --> 00:16:44,774
when the ice that clung onto your beard
450
00:16:44,810 --> 00:16:48,518
was screaming agony?
451
00:16:49,915 --> 00:16:53,583
"Hamlet" is my favorite play.
452
00:16:53,618 --> 00:16:55,652
I am totally in.
453
00:16:55,687 --> 00:16:57,219
Yes!
454
00:16:57,255 --> 00:16:58,588
That's not "Hamlet."
455
00:16:58,623 --> 00:17:01,223
Bro, did the play in college.
456
00:17:01,259 --> 00:17:02,692
I think I know "Hamlet."
457
00:17:02,727 --> 00:17:05,095
Yeah, it's Jethro Tull, "Aqualung."
458
00:17:16,899 --> 00:17:24,205
♪ Don't break me too
like they did to you ♪
459
00:17:24,240 --> 00:17:28,575
♪ Don't break me too ♪
460
00:17:28,611 --> 00:17:30,543
♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪
461
00:17:30,579 --> 00:17:32,646
♪ 'Cause I'll make it through ♪
462
00:17:32,681 --> 00:17:34,414
♪ With or without you ♪
463
00:17:34,449 --> 00:17:41,554
♪ So go and throw it all away ♪
464
00:17:41,590 --> 00:17:47,327
♪ Whoa, change ♪
465
00:17:47,362 --> 00:17:50,597
♪ Ooh ♪
466
00:17:50,632 --> 00:17:53,366
♪ ♪
467
00:17:53,401 --> 00:17:56,336
[cheers and applause]
468
00:17:57,939 --> 00:17:59,772
Thank you.
469
00:17:59,807 --> 00:18:02,441
All right, now I'd like to welcome
a very special guest.
470
00:18:02,476 --> 00:18:04,543
She's gonna come up
here and sing a song for you.
471
00:18:04,578 --> 00:18:06,112
[cheering]
472
00:18:06,147 --> 00:18:08,614
Please welcome Ava Delaney.
473
00:18:08,650 --> 00:18:11,550
[cheers and applause]
474
00:18:11,585 --> 00:18:13,352
[mumbles] A minor.
475
00:18:17,191 --> 00:18:18,323
- Good.
- You ready?
476
00:18:18,359 --> 00:18:19,991
One, two, three!
477
00:18:20,027 --> 00:18:22,994
[relaxed rock music]
478
00:18:23,030 --> 00:18:25,894
♪ ♪
479
00:18:30,371 --> 00:18:34,873
♪ Diamond rings don't mean a thing ♪
480
00:18:34,908 --> 00:18:39,510
♪ Not impressed by the
places you've been ♪
481
00:18:39,546 --> 00:18:43,614
♪ Nothing changed since
you've been gone ♪
482
00:18:43,650 --> 00:18:47,952
♪ Time to get you
back where you belong ♪
483
00:18:47,988 --> 00:18:51,088
♪ With me ♪
484
00:18:51,123 --> 00:18:53,724
♪ You belong to me ♪
485
00:18:53,759 --> 00:18:58,028
♪ ♪
486
00:18:58,064 --> 00:19:02,766
♪ Got your scent on
the nape of my neck ♪
487
00:19:02,802 --> 00:19:07,037
♪ Gonna give you
as good as it gets ♪
488
00:19:07,073 --> 00:19:11,541
♪ Hush, now, honey, gonna
welcome you home ♪
489
00:19:11,577 --> 00:19:18,515
♪ Right back here where
you belong to me ♪
490
00:19:18,550 --> 00:19:23,253
♪ Hush, hush, hush ♪
491
00:19:23,288 --> 00:19:26,155
♪ Hush, hush ♪
492
00:19:26,191 --> 00:19:30,827
♪ Don't matter what you was after ♪
493
00:19:30,862 --> 00:19:34,664
♪ Searching the world ♪
494
00:19:34,700 --> 00:19:39,436
♪ 'Cause all that
hollow chitter chatter ♪
495
00:19:39,471 --> 00:19:44,240
♪ Brought you right
back to your original girl ♪
496
00:19:44,275 --> 00:19:49,045
♪ ♪
497
00:19:49,080 --> 00:19:51,614
Hey, to Ava! A star is born.
498
00:19:51,649 --> 00:19:53,582
Oh, no, no, a shooting star, maybe.
499
00:19:53,618 --> 00:19:55,284
Ava, you killed it, okay?
500
00:19:55,319 --> 00:19:56,585
We need to get you out front more.
501
00:19:56,621 --> 00:19:58,420
You need to be singing a song at night.
502
00:19:58,456 --> 00:20:00,389
And we have to come up with
a great stage name, you know,
503
00:20:00,424 --> 00:20:02,157
like Johnny Rock or Flash.
504
00:20:02,192 --> 00:20:03,392
Flava Ava.
505
00:20:03,427 --> 00:20:04,460
No, no, no, I got it.
506
00:20:04,495 --> 00:20:06,662
I got it. Ava Del Riva.
507
00:20:06,697 --> 00:20:09,231
What about just Ava?
508
00:20:09,267 --> 00:20:11,066
Like Sia, but Ava.
509
00:20:11,101 --> 00:20:12,067
- No, no, no.
- Ava X.
510
00:20:12,102 --> 00:20:13,935
- Ava X!
- That's it.
511
00:20:13,971 --> 00:20:15,070
Yes!
512
00:20:15,105 --> 00:20:16,504
- Oh!
- I like that.
513
00:20:16,539 --> 00:20:18,506
I'm dating Ava X.
514
00:20:18,541 --> 00:20:19,581
What do you think of that?
515
00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:21,026
Cheers, cheers, cheers!
516
00:20:21,027 --> 00:20:22,878
- Yeah!
- Ava X.
517
00:20:32,845 --> 00:20:33,811
That was good.
518
00:20:33,846 --> 00:20:36,814
It was... that was very good.
519
00:20:36,849 --> 00:20:38,048
Not better?
520
00:20:38,084 --> 00:20:41,819
It was better.
521
00:20:41,854 --> 00:20:44,321
There was, like, no tongue action.
522
00:20:44,356 --> 00:20:46,657
I thought you didn't like tongue action.
523
00:20:46,692 --> 00:20:47,992
I do. I like it.
524
00:20:48,027 --> 00:20:49,226
I just like it delayed.
525
00:20:49,261 --> 00:20:50,594
How delayed?
526
00:20:50,630 --> 00:20:52,896
I don't know, like a minute or two?
527
00:20:52,932 --> 00:20:55,165
But not the whole
tongue, just a little bit.
528
00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:56,899
- How little?
- I don't...
529
00:20:56,935 --> 00:21:00,203
Just like a tiny little
flick, sometimes more,
530
00:21:00,239 --> 00:21:04,741
other times less, other times way less.
531
00:21:04,776 --> 00:21:08,077
- Are you upset?
- No, just confused.
532
00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:26,328
Oh, hello, Dr. Pavlov.
533
00:21:26,364 --> 00:21:28,063
[moaning]
534
00:21:28,098 --> 00:21:29,464
Oh, yes.
535
00:21:29,499 --> 00:21:31,399
Oh, Johnny.
536
00:21:31,434 --> 00:21:33,934
Oh, no, no, no, no, no... don't stop.
537
00:21:33,970 --> 00:21:35,770
I was just coming
up for some air, honey.
538
00:21:35,805 --> 00:21:37,172
Oh, my God, I can't believe it's
539
00:21:37,207 --> 00:21:39,674
taken you this long to find that spot.
540
00:21:39,709 --> 00:21:43,178
Oh, you could have given
me a little direction.
541
00:21:43,213 --> 00:21:46,013
I didn't even know it was there.
542
00:21:46,049 --> 00:21:47,314
Yeah, there you go.
543
00:21:47,349 --> 00:21:49,016
Oh, yeah.
544
00:21:49,052 --> 00:21:50,818
Oh, that spot... that's...
yeah, that spot...
545
00:21:50,853 --> 00:21:52,519
that spot's... oh, yeah.
546
00:21:52,555 --> 00:21:54,689
Oh, Johnny. [chuckles]
547
00:21:57,598 --> 00:22:02,216
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
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