1
00:01:42,083 --> 00:01:45,575
{lively chatter)

2
00:03:05,042 --> 00:03:07,624
{chatter continues)

3
00:03:23,292 --> 00:03:25,783
{echoing laughter)

4
00:03:34,417 --> 00:03:37,284
- (chime)
- (automated voice) Till number one.

5
00:03:37,375 --> 00:03:38,706
{machine whirs)

6
00:03:43,625 --> 00:03:46,241
- (chime)
- (automated voice) Till number one.

7
00:03:52,625 --> 00:03:55,332
- (chime)
- (automated voice) Till number one.

8
00:04:06,375 --> 00:04:08,582
Good morning, sir,
welcome to Waingel's Bank.

9
00:04:08,667 --> 00:04:10,373
My name is Sheila.
How can I help you?

10
00:04:10,458 --> 00:04:12,449
{choral music plays)

11
00:04:16,167 --> 00:04:17,703
{phone rings)

12
00:04:21,458 --> 00:04:25,952
01632 960786?

13
00:04:26,042 --> 00:04:28,454
- (man) You all righl?
- Yeah, all right. You?

14
00:04:28,542 --> 00:04:30,783
- (man) Yeah, yeah.
- Do you want me to get him?

15
00:04:30,875 --> 00:04:38,498
- (man) Uh, yeah.
- Vince! Vince! Telephone!

16
00:04:38,583 --> 00:04:41,541
- (Vince) Is that Gwen?
- No, your dad.

17
00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:54,366
- All right?
- (man) Don'task. You?

18
00:04:54,458 --> 00:04:56,369
(laughs) Yeah, you?

19
00:04:56,458 --> 00:04:59,450
(choral music continues)

20
00:05:06,792 --> 00:05:08,407
(Vince laughs in distance)

21
00:05:16,292 --> 00:05:19,739
(synth music)

22
00:06:03,833 --> 00:06:05,323
(footsteps)

23
00:06:09,833 --> 00:06:12,825
- (Sheila) What are you doing?
- Going round Dad's.

24
00:06:12,917 --> 00:06:14,077
What about supper?

25
00:06:14,167 --> 00:06:16,203
What supper?
You didn‘t tell me anything?

26
00:06:16,292 --> 00:06:18,453
Don't give me that! Of course you knew.

27
00:06:18,542 --> 00:06:20,157
What else do I do every evening?

28
00:06:20,250 --> 00:06:22,241
Just put it in the fridge.
I can have it tomorrow.

29
00:06:22,333 --> 00:06:25,325
Vince, you are pushing me to the edge,
do you know that?

30
00:06:25,792 --> 00:06:28,374
Eat your dinner,
then you can go to your dad's.

31
00:06:28,458 --> 00:06:31,370
- Leave it out, Mum.
- Well, what are you going to eat?

32
00:06:31,458 --> 00:06:33,039
Stacy's making a curry.

33
00:06:33,125 --> 00:06:34,410
Who's Stacy?

34
00:06:34,500 --> 00:06:36,036
His new bird.

35
00:06:39,625 --> 00:06:40,740
He didn‘t tell you?

36
00:06:44,958 --> 00:06:46,368
(front door shuts)

37
00:06:55,875 --> 00:06:56,864
(tuts)

38
00:07:18,500 --> 00:07:19,706
(camera clicks)

39
00:07:21,625 --> 00:07:22,614
(camera clicks)

40
00:07:23,708 --> 00:07:24,697
(camera clicks)

41
00:07:25,875 --> 00:07:26,955
(camera clicks)

42
00:07:58,125 --> 00:08:00,116
0h! Freezing out there!

43
00:08:00,208 --> 00:08:01,869
(Vince) I thought you'd be back at six.

44
00:08:02,500 --> 00:08:04,832
Long queue in the post office.

45
00:08:04,917 --> 00:08:07,875
You'd think it'd be empty
after Christmas.

46
00:08:07,958 --> 00:08:09,289
(Vince) Starving here!

47
00:08:10,125 --> 00:08:13,697
Forgot already what you were
hanging on about last night?

48
00:08:13,792 --> 00:08:15,157
Fridge dinners and all that?

49
00:08:15,250 --> 00:08:18,492
Or have you gone oft
the idea of stale food...

50
00:08:19,583 --> 00:08:22,655
Oh, sorry.

51
00:08:22,750 --> 00:08:24,991
I didn't know you had company.

52
00:08:25,542 --> 00:08:27,203
How's it going, Gwen?

53
00:08:27,583 --> 00:08:31,155
- (Vince) She's modelling.
- Pardon me, then.

54
00:08:32,125 --> 00:08:34,582
I'm cooking for three then, am I?

55
00:08:35,250 --> 00:08:39,493
- Gwen? Vince? Anyone?
- Yes, please.

56
00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:41,490
Have you offered her anything?

57
00:08:42,125 --> 00:08:43,615
We only just started.

58
00:08:44,542 --> 00:08:46,624
Gwen, would you like a drink?

59
00:08:52,083 --> 00:08:53,072
Let's have a look.

60
00:08:54,958 --> 00:08:56,573
(sighs)

61
00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:05,868
Very good!
He's made you look really lovely, Gwen.

62
00:09:07,583 --> 00:09:09,244
| wish I had that talent.

63
00:09:21,958 --> 00:09:23,368
(Gwen moans softly)

64
00:09:26,875 --> 00:09:28,615
( Vince moans softly)

65
00:09:46,917 --> 00:09:50,239
(Gwen moans softly)

66
00:09:51,208 --> 00:09:52,698
( Vince moans softly)

67
00:10:01,542 --> 00:10:04,033
(Gwen moans loudly)

68
00:10:19,833 --> 00:10:21,789
(phone rings)

69
00:10:24,292 --> 00:10:29,207
(Sheila on answerphone)
You've reached 01632 960786.

70
00:10:29,292 --> 00:10:31,749
I'm not in right now,
but if you leave a message,

71
00:10:31,833 --> 00:10:33,164
lll get straight back to you.

72
00:10:33,250 --> 00:10:34,490
(answerphone beeps)

73
00:10:34,583 --> 00:10:39,703
(man) This is a message for Sheila.
lt's Adonis. Box number 1592.

74
00:10:39,792 --> 00:10:42,534
I got your letter and your photo.

75
00:10:42,625 --> 00:10:44,161
I've got a few other dates this week,

76
00:10:44,250 --> 00:10:46,286
but give me a call
and I'll see if i can slot you in.

77
00:10:46,750 --> 00:10:51,119
My number is 01632 960322.

78
00:11:14,625 --> 00:11:16,616
(strong accent) A purchase on a horizon,

79
00:11:16,708 --> 00:11:18,915
a panoply of temptation.

80
00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:20,536
Can a curious soul desist?

81
00:11:20,958 --> 00:11:23,074
I'm just looking. thank you.

82
00:11:23,458 --> 00:11:26,370
The hesitation in your voice
soon to be an echo

83
00:11:26,458 --> 00:11:29,291
in the recesses
of the spheres of retail.

84
00:11:46,083 --> 00:11:48,244
(hushed conversation)

85
00:12:04,875 --> 00:12:08,788
Imagine, 60 percent vanished
from this sensational garment.

86
00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:14,197
In apprehensions
lie the crevices of clarity.

87
00:12:15,917 --> 00:12:17,828
(Sheila) Isn't it a little risque?

88
00:12:17,917 --> 00:12:21,705
A provocation.
For what else must one wear?

89
00:12:21,792 --> 00:12:23,908
I'm just going on a date.

90
00:12:24,000 --> 00:12:30,997
A date? Well? And what kind of date?
Food and drinks?

91
00:12:31,083 --> 00:12:32,994
Food and drinks, yeah.

92
00:12:33,083 --> 00:12:35,620
An embellishment of occasion,
for instance,

93
00:12:35,708 --> 00:12:38,450
but also the emphasis
of comfort and pleasure.

94
00:12:39,042 --> 00:12:42,739
Thus you will destroy two birds
with a stone.

95
00:13:23,792 --> 00:13:24,907
(shop assistant gasps)

96
00:13:27,417 --> 00:13:30,454
Imagine, the dress is your image

97
00:13:30,542 --> 00:13:34,706
and from me onto what you project
through an illusion.

98
00:13:37,375 --> 00:13:42,620
One sensation of mind,
one fabric in recollection of touch.

99
00:13:42,708 --> 00:13:44,039
(sighs)

100
00:13:44,125 --> 00:13:47,197
But this is how I see
your night romance.

101
00:13:47,917 --> 00:13:49,703
I predict the fantasy.

102
00:13:50,375 --> 00:13:53,822
Isn't it small? What size is this?

103
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:55,490
Thirty-six.

104
00:13:56,333 --> 00:13:58,198
But I'm not a thirty-six.

105
00:13:59,708 --> 00:14:03,576
In a number is only
the equation of actuality.

106
00:14:04,167 --> 00:14:08,365
Dimensions and proportions transcend
the prisms of our measurements.

107
00:14:10,250 --> 00:14:12,366
- You're not getting any more in?
- (tuts)

108
00:14:12,458 --> 00:14:14,699
(exhales)

109
00:14:16,292 --> 00:14:21,241
There's a lucky man somewhere
in the vista of this mysterious mirror.

110
00:14:22,375 --> 00:14:23,785
May I ask his name?

111
00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:27,036
His name's Adonis.

112
00:14:27,125 --> 00:14:30,788
Adonis? I see him.

113
00:14:30,875 --> 00:14:32,331
I like him.

114
00:14:36,792 --> 00:14:39,989
And it's not clinging too tightly here?

115
00:14:40,083 --> 00:14:43,905
Desist warning attention
to the askew perception of self.

116
00:14:44,875 --> 00:14:48,163
Lightest trivia
and the local vectors of frivolity

117
00:14:48,250 --> 00:14:51,208
are the topics
Adonis will be discussing tonight.

118
00:14:52,750 --> 00:14:55,332
I don't normally wear
this kind of thing.

119
00:14:55,833 --> 00:14:59,701
Darings eclipse
the dark circumference of caution.

120
00:15:00,875 --> 00:15:04,618
Be bold.
Your date will compliment you.

121
00:15:24,250 --> 00:15:26,241
(air escapes)

122
00:15:28,583 --> 00:15:30,699
(capsule rattles through tubes)

123
00:15:36,500 --> 00:15:37,489
Touch it.

124
00:15:39,583 --> 00:15:40,698
Feel it here.

125
00:15:58,625 --> 00:16:03,824
And may I interest you in other desired
supposes in our exclusive boutique?

126
00:16:03,917 --> 00:16:06,533
I'm fine for now, thank you.

127
00:16:06,625 --> 00:16:09,162
Then I would like you to announce
your locus of residence

128
00:16:09,250 --> 00:16:11,957
followed by the numbers
to your telephone.

129
00:16:12,625 --> 00:16:14,331
Sheila Woolchapel,

130
00:16:14,417 --> 00:16:18,786
16 Ferndale Road,
Thames Valley-on-Thames.

131
00:16:18,875 --> 00:16:25,030
01632 960786.

132
00:16:55,542 --> 00:16:57,373
(hushed, echoing voices)

133
00:17:09,167 --> 00:17:10,373
(abrupt silence)

134
00:17:10,958 --> 00:17:12,198
(metallic clunk)

135
00:17:14,667 --> 00:17:16,123
(air escapes)

136
00:17:22,667 --> 00:17:23,952
Thank you.

137
00:17:24,417 --> 00:17:27,614
The pleasure is all mine,
Sheila Woolchapel.

138
00:17:27,708 --> 00:17:32,031
Adonis will be waiting
and he will compliment you.

139
00:17:36,792 --> 00:17:39,784
- (chime)
- (automated voice) Till number one.

140
00:17:42,375 --> 00:17:44,741
- (chime)
- (automated voice) Till number one.

141
00:17:44,833 --> 00:17:46,073
(buzzer sounds)

142
00:17:55,708 --> 00:17:58,871
(coins rattle)

143
00:18:21,500 --> 00:18:24,116
(phone rings)

144
00:18:27,750 --> 00:18:30,457
(assistant) Sheila Woo/chapel,

145
00:18:30,542 --> 00:18:35,161
16 Ferndale Road,
Thames Valley-on-Thames.

146
00:18:35,250 --> 00:18:36,456
Telephonic code:

147
00:18:36,542 --> 00:18:44,290
zero and one and six and three
and two and nine and six and zero

148
00:18:44,375 --> 00:18:48,493
and seven and eight and six and stop.

149
00:18:49,625 --> 00:18:52,697
(Gwen) Well, maybe I can actually,
you know...

150
00:18:55,083 --> 00:18:56,698
No, I'm not.

151
00:19:00,625 --> 00:19:04,163
I'm off. Your dinner’s in the fridge.

152
00:19:07,583 --> 00:19:09,414
(Vince) What have you done to your hair?

153
00:19:10,667 --> 00:19:11,656
Why?

154
00:19:12,500 --> 00:19:13,831
Looks like the council cut it.

155
00:19:14,833 --> 00:19:15,913
Thanks.

156
00:19:16,833 --> 00:19:18,664
You're not dating, are you?

157
00:19:19,667 --> 00:19:22,329
Why? Aren't I allowed to?

158
00:19:22,417 --> 00:19:23,577
Bit soon?

159
00:19:24,042 --> 00:19:26,374
(exhales) I didn't know
there was a time limit.

160
00:19:27,208 --> 00:19:29,073
I thought you wanted
to get back with Dad.

161
00:19:29,167 --> 00:19:34,332
That was a while ago,
and obviously your dad had other ideas.

162
00:19:36,458 --> 00:19:41,998
Oh, and tell that femme fatale of yours
to get off the phone.

163
00:19:42,083 --> 00:19:44,165
It's gonna cost me a fortune.

164
00:19:48,042 --> 00:19:54,117
(Sheila on answerphone)
You've reached 01632 960786.

165
00:19:54,208 --> 00:19:58,577
l'm not in right now, but if you leave
a message I'll get straight back to you.

166
00:19:58,667 --> 00:20:00,032
(answerphone beeps)

167
00:20:00,125 --> 00:20:02,207
(Adonis) lt's Adonis again.

168
00:20:02,292 --> 00:20:05,830
Amesos Greek restaurant, 7:30.

169
00:20:05,917 --> 00:20:09,785
Ill be wearing a dark Donningtonio suit
and oan'ying a rose.

170
00:20:09,875 --> 00:20:14,289
l'm tall, slim, short back and sides.

171
00:20:14,375 --> 00:20:17,082
If you don't find me, Ill find you.

172
00:21:33,792 --> 00:21:34,781
0h!

173
00:21:34,875 --> 00:21:37,617
- (Adonis) Box number 1592?
- (Sheila) Yeah.

174
00:21:37,708 --> 00:21:40,666
- (Adonis) Did I scare you?
- No, it's fine.

175
00:21:40,750 --> 00:21:43,708
(Adonis) I've got some love vouchers
that will give us ten percent off

176
00:21:43,792 --> 00:21:45,407
as long as we share the same pudding.

177
00:21:45,500 --> 00:21:49,698
Pudding? Sounds good. Join me.

178
00:22:00,292 --> 00:22:01,748
(opens briefcase)

179
00:22:03,958 --> 00:22:05,823
(rustling)

180
00:22:08,125 --> 00:22:10,582
- As promised.
- Oh, thank you.

181
00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:20,161
- What?
- You look different.

182
00:22:20,708 --> 00:22:21,823
How?

183
00:22:22,750 --> 00:22:24,035
Well, your hair.

184
00:22:25,333 --> 00:22:26,789
Hair grows back.

185
00:22:39,583 --> 00:22:40,743
(creaking)

186
00:22:45,292 --> 00:22:48,659
- Do you know what you're having?
- (Adonis) In a minute, 0K?

187
00:22:49,583 --> 00:22:51,119
The moussaka looks good.

188
00:23:06,375 --> 00:23:08,457
(Sheila) So, you like dancing then?

189
00:23:09,792 --> 00:23:11,748
Not tonight, I sprained my ankle.

190
00:23:11,833 --> 00:23:15,951
God, I didn't mean tonight.
Just in general. You like dancing?

191
00:23:16,042 --> 00:23:17,031
Yeah.

192
00:23:24,083 --> 00:23:27,905
It says in your lonely hearts
advertisement that you like laughing.

193
00:23:29,083 --> 00:23:30,072
Yeah.

194
00:23:32,417 --> 00:23:33,577
What kind of things?

195
00:23:34,125 --> 00:23:35,865
Funny things.

196
00:23:35,958 --> 00:23:39,200
- What about cooking?
- What is this, an exam?

197
00:23:42,542 --> 00:23:44,407
(waiter) Friendly evenings, guests.

198
00:23:44,500 --> 00:23:47,663
Welcome to Amesos.
My name is Vlassis and you are?

199
00:23:48,958 --> 00:23:50,573
Sheila Woolchapel.

200
00:23:51,958 --> 00:23:53,164
Adonis Jackson.

201
00:23:53,250 --> 00:23:55,582
(Vlassis) And may I take
your lucky orders?

202
00:23:59,333 --> 00:24:00,322
Madam?

203
00:24:00,833 --> 00:24:04,621
Oh, there will be the lzatziki
for the starter

204
00:24:04,708 --> 00:24:08,030
and vegetable moussaka for the main.

205
00:24:08,125 --> 00:24:10,332
Instantly, madam. You, sir?

206
00:24:17,083 --> 00:24:20,075
Um... (clears throat)
I will come back for your lucky order.

207
00:24:26,417 --> 00:24:28,749
{Adonis munches noisily)

208
00:24:34,708 --> 00:24:36,790
(sighs)

209
00:25:02,792 --> 00:25:09,322
Vince? Vince? Get a move on.
l'm desperate. Vince?

210
00:25:13,500 --> 00:25:16,992
Sorry, I didn't know
you were staying over.

211
00:25:17,083 --> 00:25:18,573
(Gwen) Didn't Vince tell you?

212
00:25:19,750 --> 00:25:21,490
Well, maybe I didn't hear.

213
00:25:21,583 --> 00:25:23,039
I hope it's not a problem.

214
00:25:23,125 --> 00:25:24,865
Of course not, no.

215
00:25:26,042 --> 00:25:27,077
Nice night out?

216
00:25:27,167 --> 00:25:30,159
Yes, thank you. Caught up with a friend.

217
00:25:30,250 --> 00:25:33,367
Where's Vince?
He didn't answer when I called him.

218
00:25:33,875 --> 00:25:36,457
He must've knocked himself out.

219
00:25:36,542 --> 00:25:41,115
It's always the way with him. As soon as
he comes, he's out for the count.

220
00:25:41,208 --> 00:25:44,405
Must be the pressure
of those mock exams.

221
00:25:44,500 --> 00:25:45,990
It should get better by February.

222
00:25:47,542 --> 00:25:49,498
Did you get anything nice in the sales?

223
00:25:49,583 --> 00:25:50,993
Not much. You?

224
00:25:51,083 --> 00:25:53,620
I found a very tasteful
pair of Carpathian stockings

225
00:25:53,708 --> 00:25:57,405
from Bentley and Soper‘s.
Seventy percent off.

226
00:25:58,167 --> 00:26:00,499
Now that's what I call a bargain.

227
00:26:01,542 --> 00:26:03,282
I'm sorry
if I was too long in the shower.

228
00:26:04,042 --> 00:26:06,954
I won't keep you waiting
as I know you're desperate.

229
00:26:42,125 --> 00:26:43,581
(metallic squeak)

230
00:26:49,833 --> 00:26:51,198
(metallic squeak)

231
00:27:04,917 --> 00:27:06,453
(creaking)

232
00:27:22,875 --> 00:27:25,082
(excited chatter)

233
00:27:25,167 --> 00:27:26,498
(applause)

234
00:27:48,500 --> 00:27:49,831
(sighs)

235
00:28:00,625 --> 00:28:03,241
- (Vince) What are you doing?
- You tell me.

236
00:28:03,333 --> 00:28:05,745
- How did this end up in here?
- (Vince) Eh?

237
00:28:06,333 --> 00:28:09,370
The next time your girlfriend
wants to try something on,

238
00:28:09,458 --> 00:28:11,244
how about asking me first?

239
00:28:11,333 --> 00:28:13,995
- (Vince) You got a screw loose?
- Don't talk to me like that.

240
00:28:14,083 --> 00:28:16,574
(Vince) Gwen wouldn't be seen dead
in something like that.

241
00:28:16,667 --> 00:28:19,374
- So how did it end up in there, then?
- How would I know?

242
00:28:19,458 --> 00:28:21,870
I don't like people
going through my things, Vince.

243
00:28:21,958 --> 00:28:25,906
- Touche! Neither do I.
- Don't you touché me.

244
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:29,197
I've had enough of her
making a mini-bar from my wine

245
00:28:29,292 --> 00:28:32,125
and now helping herself to my wardrobe.

246
00:28:32,208 --> 00:28:35,530
She's turning my house into a boudoir
and I'm not having it.

247
00:28:35,625 --> 00:28:38,332
It's becoming a bit disgusting
if you must know.

248
00:28:38,417 --> 00:28:39,406
Leave it out, Mum.

249
00:28:39,500 --> 00:28:41,786
No, I'm not going to leave it out,
young Vincent.

250
00:28:41,875 --> 00:28:45,197
I'll say it again
because nothing gets through your head.

251
00:28:45,292 --> 00:28:49,035
To be frank,
I find Gwen a bit disgusting.

252
00:28:49,750 --> 00:28:52,787
And the sooner
you take that on board, the better.

253
00:28:57,458 --> 00:29:00,325
(echoing voices)

254
00:29:10,333 --> 00:29:11,743
(echoing yell)

255
00:29:17,917 --> 00:29:18,906
(Sheila) Hello.

256
00:29:53,042 --> 00:29:54,907
(Sheila) I hope you didn't move
without me.

257
00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:56,581
Don't get paranoid, Mum.

258
00:29:57,292 --> 00:29:59,704
Now where were we?

259
00:29:59,792 --> 00:30:01,373
Your turn, Don Juan.

260
00:30:18,542 --> 00:30:20,954
- Oh, my God, what's that?
- What?

261
00:30:21,792 --> 00:30:23,248
That looks nasty.

262
00:30:24,167 --> 00:30:25,703
Just some sort of rash.

263
00:30:25,792 --> 00:30:27,532
Ugh, I hope it isn't catchy.

264
00:30:27,625 --> 00:30:29,456
Yeah, what is that?
I saw it the other day.

265
00:30:29,542 --> 00:30:34,161
I don't know. An allergy of some sort.
Maybe the washing powder.

266
00:30:34,250 --> 00:30:36,912
- You should get it looked at, Mum.
- Don't scare me.

267
00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:40,913
I'm not scaring you. Just get a cream
and Bob's your uncle. For your sake.

268
00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:43,286
(Gwen) Myfinancial advisor
had something similar.

269
00:30:43,375 --> 00:30:45,536
Some kind of blood infection.

270
00:30:45,625 --> 00:30:47,490
Ended up having to
amputate her right arm.

271
00:30:47,583 --> 00:30:50,370
- (Vince scoffs) Don't give me that.
- Seriously!

272
00:30:50,458 --> 00:30:53,325
The doctor kept sending her
home saying it was some kind of allergy

273
00:30:53,417 --> 00:30:55,032
and she ended up really ill.

274
00:30:56,250 --> 00:30:58,457
But it's fine now.

275
00:30:58,542 --> 00:31:01,739
She eventually learnt to write
left-handed.

276
00:31:01,833 --> 00:31:04,119
Beautiful handwriting too.

277
00:31:04,958 --> 00:31:05,993
Your turn.

278
00:31:10,292 --> 00:31:11,407
(dice rattles)

279
00:31:25,333 --> 00:31:26,823
(Vince) Oh, dear.

280
00:31:30,833 --> 00:31:32,573
Tough decision.

281
00:31:43,958 --> 00:31:45,789
(whirs loudly)

282
00:32:02,000 --> 00:32:03,456
(Vince in French)

283
00:32:03,667 --> 00:32:05,407
(Gwen in French)

284
00:32:10,667 --> 00:32:12,498
Do you have to talk French all the time?

285
00:32:13,083 --> 00:32:15,244
He has to practise for his A levels.

286
00:32:15,333 --> 00:32:17,369
{loud clanging)

287
00:32:26,583 --> 00:32:27,789
Actually.

288
00:32:28,333 --> 00:32:30,415
(washing machine whirs in distance)

289
00:32:31,375 --> 00:32:34,082
- Sorry.
- (exhales)

290
00:32:38,542 --> 00:32:40,203
- (laughs)
- (distant clatter)

291
00:32:40,292 --> 00:32:41,782
(Vince) What was that?

292
00:32:42,333 --> 00:32:44,540
- (Sheila) Turn it off.
- (Vince) I've turned it off!

293
00:32:44,625 --> 00:32:46,115
Pull the plug out!

294
00:32:47,292 --> 00:32:48,998
(scraping)

295
00:32:50,250 --> 00:32:53,663
Sit on it or something! 0h!

296
00:32:55,042 --> 00:32:57,124
- (slicing)
- (screams)

297
00:32:57,208 --> 00:32:58,698
(heavy thudding)

298
00:32:59,958 --> 00:33:01,118
(Vince) Mum!

299
00:33:03,458 --> 00:33:05,494
- (thudding intensifies)
- (Sheila groans)

300
00:33:12,375 --> 00:33:13,831
(Sheila screams)

301
00:33:15,458 --> 00:33:16,914
What's going on with this thing?

302
00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:18,911
(metallic screeching)

303
00:37:12,458 --> 00:37:15,370
(9’35”)

304
00:37:17,375 --> 00:37:18,740
(exhales sharply)

305
00:37:20,833 --> 00:37:21,868
(exhales sharply)

306
00:37:23,875 --> 00:37:25,456
(exhales)

307
00:37:47,417 --> 00:37:48,782
(indistinct)

308
00:37:51,042 --> 00:37:53,749
- (chime)
- (automated voice) Till number two.

309
00:37:58,250 --> 00:38:00,036
(man) Thanks for coming in, Sheila.

310
00:38:00,125 --> 00:38:03,367
Look at that, still finding
pine needles everywhere. (laughs)

311
00:38:03,458 --> 00:38:07,326
Allover our sofa back home as well.
Must get a plastic tree next year.

312
00:38:07,417 --> 00:38:09,499
Yeah, we must. How's it going, Sheila?

313
00:38:09,583 --> 00:38:11,574
- Yeah, everything's fine.
- (man) Ah.

314
00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:13,410
What happened to your hand?

315
00:38:13,500 --> 00:38:16,867
Nothing much.
Washing machine went bananas.

316
00:38:16,958 --> 00:38:19,665
Well, we know a very good repair company
if you need anyone.

317
00:38:19,750 --> 00:38:22,617
- What's that, Staverton's?
- Yeah. Staverton's Wash. In your area.

318
00:38:22,708 --> 00:38:24,744
They did wonders with our machine,
didn't they, Clive?

319
00:38:24,833 --> 00:38:26,915
Yeah, they did.
A really good mechanic.

320
00:38:27,000 --> 00:38:30,492
So how are things going? Do you feel
on top of things at the moment?

321
00:38:30,583 --> 00:38:32,369
Yeah, I think so.

322
00:38:32,458 --> 00:38:35,416
We didn't see you
at the Christmas bowling the other week.

323
00:38:35,500 --> 00:38:37,991
Oh, I think I had a lot on
with my son that night.

324
00:38:38,083 --> 00:38:40,119
Hmm. Interesting.

325
00:38:40,208 --> 00:38:43,621
Sheila, Pete Mathinson
spoke to us the other day.

326
00:38:43,708 --> 00:38:47,200
Now he's really impressed with how
you're all doing. Lots of good feedback.

327
00:38:47,292 --> 00:38:50,705
Yeah, he also noticed how attuned you
were to the Waingel's Wavelength.

328
00:38:50,792 --> 00:38:53,124
Yeah. One thing he flagged
with us though.

329
00:38:53,208 --> 00:38:55,244
He wasn't sure about your handshake.

330
00:38:57,125 --> 00:39:00,037
Pete thinks you're doing really well,
likes the way you smell as well,

331
00:39:00,125 --> 00:39:03,197
but to tell you the truth,
the handshake did come up

332
00:39:03,292 --> 00:39:07,490
and Pete commented on how
perhaps it wasn't meaningful enough.

333
00:39:08,042 --> 00:39:10,954
Sheila, Pete wanted you
to have this article here.

334
00:39:11,042 --> 00:39:14,330
Um... It's about the importance
of a meaningful handshake.

335
00:39:14,417 --> 00:39:16,282
Sure, I'll take a look.

336
00:39:16,375 --> 00:39:18,206
(man) It's written
in a fun, easy language

337
00:39:18,292 --> 00:39:21,034
and there's a cartoon at the end
that summarises the key points.

338
00:39:21,125 --> 00:39:23,707
And Sheila, if you want, we'd be happy
to try out a role-play scenario

339
00:39:23,792 --> 00:39:26,659
- which involves handshaking.
- It doesn't have to be a bank scenario.

340
00:39:26,750 --> 00:39:28,581
We have a range of costumes
we could all try on.

341
00:39:28,667 --> 00:39:31,033
- It's OK, I'll practise at home.
- Hm.

342
00:39:31,417 --> 00:39:33,829
One other thing, Sheila.

343
00:39:33,917 --> 00:39:38,240
One of your colleagues noticed
that you tend to visit the ladies' room

344
00:39:38,333 --> 00:39:40,824
prior to clocking out for feeding time.

345
00:39:41,917 --> 00:39:43,498
Who told you this?

346
00:39:43,583 --> 00:39:45,790
It wouldn't be professional of us
to say her name.

347
00:39:45,875 --> 00:39:49,538
I normally clock out
and instantly leave the building.

348
00:39:49,625 --> 00:39:51,411
Well, if it's a one-off we understand,

349
00:39:51,500 --> 00:39:54,617
but we just wanted to flag it up
with you, in case Pete finds out.

350
00:39:54,708 --> 00:39:56,539
A minute or two
might not seem significant,

351
00:39:56,625 --> 00:39:58,456
but when we spoke to your colleague,

352
00:39:58,542 --> 00:40:01,534
she did some calculations
and rightly reminded us

353
00:40:01,625 --> 00:40:04,913
that if these unwarranted toilet visits
were to take place

354
00:40:05,000 --> 00:40:07,332
at an estimate of
two minutes per visit,

355
00:40:07,417 --> 00:40:11,080
you would accrue
over four hundred minutes every year.

356
00:40:11,167 --> 00:40:14,489
And to tell you the truth, two minutes
for a visit to the toilet is generous.

357
00:40:14,583 --> 00:40:16,824
Well, in my experience
its two and a half.

358
00:40:16,917 --> 00:40:18,748
I timed myself
right before this meeting.

359
00:40:18,833 --> 00:40:22,496
(sighs) It was a one-off,
I can assure you.

360
00:40:23,083 --> 00:40:26,120
Whoever it was who informed you
of my transgression

361
00:40:26,208 --> 00:40:30,998
obviously doesn't notice
that I'm regularly in ten minutes early.

362
00:40:31,083 --> 00:40:33,165
Maybe you could do the maths on that.

363
00:40:34,583 --> 00:40:37,416
- What do you think?
- Is fantastic.

364
00:40:37,500 --> 00:40:38,990
And the shawl?

365
00:40:39,083 --> 00:40:42,701
The shawlest vantage
praises January customer

366
00:40:42,792 --> 00:40:47,912
for she is in purchase
of our sacred domain. Cheers.

367
00:40:50,125 --> 00:40:52,036
It's a little tight
around the shoulders.

368
00:40:52,125 --> 00:40:54,958
I knew I'd need a size up
after Christmas.

369
00:40:55,042 --> 00:40:58,580
When your stature is emphasised,
it is my duty to provide you

370
00:40:58,667 --> 00:41:03,206
with a notion of proportion
that reflects your ideal of dimension.

371
00:41:03,292 --> 00:41:04,702
Wait here.

372
00:41:36,625 --> 00:41:38,365
(eerie echoing noise)

373
00:41:38,458 --> 00:41:41,495
Our perspectives
on the spectres of mortality

374
00:41:41,583 --> 00:41:45,701
must not be compromised
by an askew index of commerce.

375
00:41:46,958 --> 00:41:48,789
- (ripping)
- (assistant gasps)

376
00:41:50,958 --> 00:41:51,947
I'm sorry.

377
00:41:53,000 --> 00:41:55,582
The model, the affliction.

378
00:41:56,417 --> 00:41:57,532
What happened?

379
00:41:59,250 --> 00:42:01,036
A calamity.

380
00:42:01,125 --> 00:42:05,494
Imagine. Jill Woodmere. Yes, she.

381
00:42:05,583 --> 00:42:09,405
Our range in garments she defined
through a rapture ofdisplay.

382
00:42:10,542 --> 00:42:15,161
And here, the last dress she wore.
Oh, how she adored it.

383
00:42:15,250 --> 00:42:16,740
I'm sorry.

384
00:42:34,667 --> 00:42:36,328
The rhombic coat?

385
00:42:37,625 --> 00:42:40,742
The rhombic coat, yes. I'll try it on.

386
00:42:41,208 --> 00:42:43,699
Sorry, one last thing.

387
00:42:43,792 --> 00:42:46,454
How many of those
dresses were in stock?

388
00:42:46,542 --> 00:42:49,158
One. Only the one.

389
00:42:49,750 --> 00:42:52,492
And the model wore that same dress?

390
00:42:53,167 --> 00:42:58,912
Yes. But imagine, she extensively
showered before that photograph.

391
00:44:43,167 --> 00:44:46,910
(moans)

392
00:44:53,542 --> 00:44:54,907
(Sheila) Vince?

393
00:44:55,000 --> 00:44:55,989
(knocking at door)

394
00:44:56,958 --> 00:44:58,198
Vince?

395
00:45:52,250 --> 00:45:54,081
(dialling tone)

396
00:45:54,167 --> 00:45:56,533
(gentle, old Greek music)

397
00:45:58,208 --> 00:46:02,281
Zach? Sheila, box number 6832.

398
00:46:05,042 --> 00:46:08,409
I have some love vouchers here
with some exciting discounts.

399
00:46:08,500 --> 00:46:11,287
That's if you don't mind
sharing a pudding with me.

400
00:46:23,583 --> 00:46:25,824
(vibrator buzzes)

401
00:46:35,500 --> 00:46:39,448
- (moans)
- (vibrator buzzes)

402
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:44,993
(moaning continues)

403
00:46:57,375 --> 00:47:00,162
- (Zach) You look familiar, you know?
- Oh, no, don't scare me.

404
00:47:00,250 --> 00:47:03,697
Seriously, I've seen you somewhere
before, I don't know where, but...

405
00:47:03,792 --> 00:47:04,998
Do you bank at Waingel's?

406
00:47:05,458 --> 00:47:07,870
Ah, I thought it was
something like that.

407
00:47:08,583 --> 00:47:11,905
I remember now.
You fined me for going over my limit!

408
00:47:12,000 --> 00:47:15,913
Oh, not me, I don't fine.
I just follow orders from above.

409
00:47:16,417 --> 00:47:17,953
I think I still have a letter from you

410
00:47:18,042 --> 00:47:20,579
asking me to make an appointment
with your managers.

411
00:47:20,667 --> 00:47:23,409
You were kind of stem, but I liked it.

412
00:47:23,500 --> 00:47:24,535
(laughs)

413
00:47:29,708 --> 00:47:31,664
{distant moaning)

414
00:47:35,292 --> 00:47:37,078
(vibrator buzzes)

415
00:48:02,167 --> 00:48:04,032
(Gwen screams)

416
00:48:04,125 --> 00:48:07,288
(screams echo)

417
00:48:09,875 --> 00:48:10,955
(screams)

418
00:48:11,042 --> 00:48:14,000
- What happened? What happened?
- (screams)

419
00:48:14,083 --> 00:48:16,825
(Vince) It's OK, it's OK.

420
00:48:16,917 --> 00:48:20,284
- (Gwen pants)
- (Vince) Come here, it's OK.

421
00:48:20,375 --> 00:48:22,787
(slow song)

422
00:48:35,542 --> 00:48:38,375
It's hard to make friends in this town.

423
00:48:38,458 --> 00:48:39,789
I know.

424
00:48:42,458 --> 00:48:43,743
Is itjust me?

425
00:48:44,667 --> 00:48:47,283
No, it's OK. Don't think about it.

426
00:48:49,292 --> 00:48:52,864
It's hard to make friends here,
it really is.

427
00:48:56,625 --> 00:48:59,367
You met many others through this?

428
00:49:00,500 --> 00:49:02,912
A few. You?

429
00:49:04,167 --> 00:49:06,078
One or two. (sighs)

430
00:49:09,417 --> 00:49:11,874
I don't need to meet anyone anymore.

431
00:49:13,125 --> 00:49:14,114
Me neither.

432
00:51:08,125 --> 00:51:11,242
"You who wear me will know me."

433
00:51:12,250 --> 00:51:13,706
What's that supposed to mean?

434
00:51:13,792 --> 00:51:15,532
(Zach) It's just a design feature.

435
00:51:15,625 --> 00:51:17,035
Cheap bit of mystery.

436
00:51:18,125 --> 00:51:21,037
You think anyone buying these things
gives a damn what it all means?

437
00:51:21,125 --> 00:51:22,365
(scrapes pan)

438
00:51:23,583 --> 00:51:25,323
Would you think I'm bonkers

439
00:51:25,417 --> 00:51:27,954
lfl told you I think something's wrong
with that dress?

440
00:51:28,042 --> 00:51:29,077
(Zach) Of course not.

441
00:51:29,167 --> 00:51:32,739
I haven't met a woman who didn't think
there was something wrong with a dress.

442
00:51:36,167 --> 00:51:38,624
A woman who modelled it died.

443
00:51:39,375 --> 00:51:43,288
And? Half the clothes I bought in the
charity shop are from people who died.

444
00:51:44,417 --> 00:51:47,033
Don't run yourself around
all this hocus pocus.

445
00:51:47,125 --> 00:51:48,706
Personally, I like you in it.

446
00:51:49,667 --> 00:51:51,157
- Really?
- (Zach) Yeah, really.

447
00:51:51,667 --> 00:51:54,374
- You're not just saying that?
- (Zach) You look good in it.

448
00:51:55,375 --> 00:51:57,582
OK, you look good in most things,

449
00:51:58,083 --> 00:52:01,405
but that dress definitely shows you off.

450
00:52:04,542 --> 00:52:05,873
Put it on.

451
00:52:10,917 --> 00:52:13,499
Don't tell me you're scared of a dress?

452
00:54:46,458 --> 00:54:48,289
(Zach) You don't want to go
into town today?

453
00:54:48,375 --> 00:54:49,911
Oh, it's a nightmare on Saturdays.

454
00:54:50,000 --> 00:54:53,538
Why don't we stay here?
You know, acclimatise you to Vince.

455
00:54:53,958 --> 00:54:55,289
No one's rushing you there.

456
00:54:56,250 --> 00:54:59,492
ljust think it'll be good for him
to see me back on my feet a little bit.

457
00:55:00,417 --> 00:55:02,248
He was a little short with me
on the phone.

458
00:55:02,333 --> 00:55:04,369
- He's in a bad way.
- (man shouts in the distance)

459
00:55:04,458 --> 00:55:06,449
The separation really got to him.

460
00:55:06,542 --> 00:55:09,124
Not helped by my ex
trying to pit him against me.

461
00:55:09,208 --> 00:55:10,948
- (Zach) Join the club.
- (man) Darren!

462
00:55:11,042 --> 00:55:13,454
- (screams)
- (dog growls)

463
00:55:13,542 --> 00:55:15,999
- No!
- (man) Darren, get off!

464
00:55:16,083 --> 00:55:18,324
Get off! Get off, Darren!

465
00:55:19,750 --> 00:55:21,741
- Darren, get off!
- (fabric rr'ps)

466
00:55:22,125 --> 00:55:26,494
- (Zach) Get off! Get off!
- (screams) My leg!

467
00:55:26,583 --> 00:55:27,993
- (dog growls)
- (Zach) Get it off!

468
00:55:28,083 --> 00:55:29,619
- (fabric rr'ps)
- (screams)

469
00:55:29,708 --> 00:55:32,666
(man) Darren, you bastard! Darren!

470
00:55:32,750 --> 00:55:35,708
- (door slams)
- (Vince) Mum!

471
00:55:37,708 --> 00:55:39,198
- Mum!
- Up here!

472
00:55:40,833 --> 00:55:42,573
(Vince) Took me ages to get your stuff!

473
00:55:42,667 --> 00:55:45,955
They asked for my ID and everything
then they gave me some punk's rucksack.

474
00:55:46,042 --> 00:55:47,373
I've no idea why they...

475
00:55:48,250 --> 00:55:50,832
Vince, this is Zach.

476
00:55:51,542 --> 00:55:53,078
A friend from work.

477
00:55:54,000 --> 00:55:55,080
Pleased to meet you.

478
00:55:55,167 --> 00:55:58,409
All right. Where do you want me
to put these, then?

479
00:55:58,875 --> 00:56:01,457
No point, they're all ripped to pieces.

480
00:56:01,542 --> 00:56:04,534
Eh? This one's not ripped.

481
00:56:04,625 --> 00:56:08,288
- Of course it's ripped.
- It's brand spanking new, almost.

482
00:56:12,083 --> 00:56:13,823
It should be ripped.

483
00:56:13,917 --> 00:56:16,750
The dog ripped it to pieces.
It should be ripped!

484
00:56:16,833 --> 00:56:19,620
I tell you, it should be ripped!

485
00:56:25,250 --> 00:56:26,365
(metallic squeaking)

486
00:56:41,250 --> 00:56:43,457
(metallic squeaking)

487
00:56:49,750 --> 00:56:51,706
(metallic squeaking)

488
00:56:51,792 --> 00:56:53,373
(pants)

489
00:56:53,458 --> 00:56:54,823
(metallic squeaking)

490
00:56:56,458 --> 00:56:58,824
- (pants)
- (metallic squeaking)

491
00:56:58,917 --> 00:57:01,750
(pants)

492
00:57:04,125 --> 00:57:06,241
(metallic squeaking)

493
00:57:14,458 --> 00:57:19,657
l have reached the dimension of remorse,
Sheila Woolchapel. The dress.

494
00:57:19,750 --> 00:57:23,368
I can't claim with its reacceptance
if its purchase is not evidenced.

495
00:57:23,458 --> 00:57:25,039
I had the receipt.

496
00:57:25,125 --> 00:57:26,786
I don't know where it's gone.

497
00:57:33,875 --> 00:57:36,457
Look, honestly, I don't need the refund.

498
00:57:36,542 --> 00:57:38,954
Just let me exchange it
for something else.

499
00:57:39,042 --> 00:57:41,954
A casual exchange seldom expresses
a lady's self-assurance

500
00:57:42,042 --> 00:57:47,958
- and her embodiment of fashion...
- You know what? Just take the dress.

501
00:57:48,042 --> 00:57:50,704
I don't need anything back,
just take it.

502
00:57:52,792 --> 00:57:56,455
Lamentations can be fairly addressed
to Miss Kolliston.

503
00:57:56,958 --> 00:58:03,113
Distinction avows her noble hearing.
Psst! Psst!

504
00:58:03,208 --> 00:58:04,414
Forget it.

505
00:58:15,417 --> 00:58:20,286
Like a whisper in an ocean,
like a feather in a storm,

506
00:58:20,875 --> 00:58:27,371
a dress of deduction finds its character
in a prism of retail abstraction.

507
00:58:28,458 --> 00:58:30,164
I don't understand.

508
00:58:31,375 --> 00:58:35,118
Miss Luckmoore
experienced a transaction of ecstasy,

509
00:58:35,958 --> 00:58:39,496
and | ask if you could
mutually sanctity her claim?

510
00:58:39,583 --> 00:58:44,998
Look, this is nothing personal,
but I'm done with the sales, thank you.

511
00:58:45,083 --> 00:58:50,203
But your dismissal of such a prestigious
consumerist festivity leaves me bereft.

512
00:58:51,208 --> 00:58:54,700
Did Miss Luckmoore
engage with the doctrine of the store

513
00:58:54,792 --> 00:59:00,458
and did the experience consolidate your
perception of the paradigm of retail?

514
00:59:01,042 --> 00:59:02,532
I've got to go back to work.

515
00:59:02,625 --> 00:59:05,992
Just a goodwill gesture
for the inaugural consumer.

516
00:59:06,083 --> 00:59:10,201
A fantastic offer,
I inferred to myself in jest.

517
00:59:11,083 --> 00:59:14,371
I just don't see
why I couldn't return this dress.

518
00:59:14,458 --> 00:59:19,782
The very purpose of this seasonal retail
occasion is to expunge.

519
00:59:20,167 --> 00:59:21,782
Returning what has already left

520
00:59:21,875 --> 00:59:25,823
the ladies' fashion boutique of Bentley
and Soper's Trusted Department Store

521
00:59:25,917 --> 00:59:29,284
goes against the nature of things.

522
00:59:39,708 --> 00:59:41,790
Such a pretty dress.

523
00:59:47,875 --> 00:59:50,082
I hope Adonis complimented you.

524
00:59:58,083 --> 00:59:59,198
Pitcroft!

525
01:00:03,875 --> 01:00:04,955
(door opens)

526
01:00:06,583 --> 01:00:09,120
- (door closes)
- How's your leg, Sheila?

527
01:00:10,875 --> 01:00:12,035
(man) Better, thank you.

528
01:00:12,708 --> 01:00:13,914
Clive knows the local vet

529
01:00:14,000 --> 01:00:17,037
and he can confirm that
he destroyed the dog on your behalf.

530
01:00:17,833 --> 01:00:19,289
(Clive) He also wanted you to know

531
01:00:19,375 --> 01:00:22,572
that he took great pleasure
in denying the dog its last biscuit.

532
01:00:23,750 --> 01:00:25,786
It must be a pain
not being able to drive.

533
01:00:25,875 --> 01:00:28,457
The doctor reckons
I can start back tomorrow.

534
01:00:28,542 --> 01:00:32,785
Oh, good, good.
Um, Sheila, can we have a word?

535
01:00:34,917 --> 01:00:36,373
Of course.

536
01:00:39,417 --> 01:00:40,452
(sighs)

537
01:00:43,708 --> 01:00:44,868
How was your weekend?

538
01:00:45,542 --> 01:00:46,952
Well, interesting.

539
01:00:47,042 --> 01:00:48,657
(Clive) Anything nice in the sales?

540
01:00:48,750 --> 01:00:50,832
Just a dress,
but that was the other week.

541
01:00:51,833 --> 01:00:53,039
Good bargains.

542
01:00:53,458 --> 01:00:56,416
Sheila, I was pleased to see your name
down on the bowling list again.

543
01:00:56,500 --> 01:00:59,116
Even though I don't think you
should be in Ruth's team, but still,

544
01:00:59,208 --> 01:01:01,950
we have a nice balance of numbers
this month, so well done.

545
01:01:02,042 --> 01:01:03,452
Should be an interesting match.

546
01:01:03,542 --> 01:01:05,658
Yeah. Looking fonrvard to it.

547
01:01:05,750 --> 01:01:09,698
Now, Sheila, we caught up
with Pete Mathinson this morning.

548
01:01:09,792 --> 01:01:11,328
Really meaningful meeting, um...

549
01:01:11,417 --> 01:01:13,749
just reviewing where we're going
with various things.

550
01:01:14,542 --> 01:01:17,989
He was very impressed
with how you're getting on, all good.

551
01:01:18,083 --> 01:01:20,574
Only he mentioned that
you waved at his mistress

552
01:01:20,667 --> 01:01:23,784
just by Landrake's tuck shop
last weekend.

553
01:01:23,875 --> 01:01:26,116
Yeah, I remember, she waved back.

554
01:01:26,208 --> 01:01:30,872
Hm. You see, she asked Pete
to call up a meeting about the incident

555
01:01:30,958 --> 01:01:32,949
and we all came to the conclusion

556
01:01:33,042 --> 01:01:37,661
that the waving can only be construed
as informal salutation.

557
01:01:39,375 --> 01:01:41,081
I don't understand.

558
01:01:41,167 --> 01:01:44,580
Technically, the mistress of a boss
is classified as a superior

559
01:01:44,667 --> 01:01:46,328
according to company policy,

560
01:01:46,417 --> 01:01:50,114
hence her surprise
at such a casual mode ofgreeting.

561
01:01:50,208 --> 01:01:52,870
Yeah, she urged us to term it
as insolent Salutation

562
01:01:52,958 --> 01:01:55,244
but she gets ahead of herself sometimes.

563
01:01:55,333 --> 01:01:57,540
She smiled. She waved back!

564
01:01:57,625 --> 01:02:01,322
Sheila, when we worked
at the other branch in town

565
01:02:01,417 --> 01:02:05,535
we had a member of staff very similar
to you; diligent, hard working.

566
01:02:05,625 --> 01:02:09,914
Only, Clive and I noticed
a core of the inscrutable about her.

567
01:02:10,000 --> 01:02:12,161
Not remotely
on the Waingel's Wavelength.

568
01:02:12,250 --> 01:02:15,697
We didn't think anything of it until
we discovered she was in the habit

569
01:02:15,792 --> 01:02:19,535
of injecting foolhardy substances
into her bloodstream on a regular basis.

570
01:02:19,625 --> 01:02:22,207
(Clive) Now we're not suggesting
you're inclined that way.

571
01:02:22,292 --> 01:02:26,740
But nonetheless,
a story shared and all that.

572
01:02:27,792 --> 01:02:30,454
And those mysterious toilet breaks
before feeding time.

573
01:02:30,542 --> 01:02:33,284
One mysterious toilet break.

574
01:02:34,833 --> 01:02:36,869
You would tell us
if there was something?

575
01:02:36,958 --> 01:02:39,745
Then we can keep Pete
and the Police Force out of this.

576
01:02:39,833 --> 01:02:43,997
Well, it'sjust been busy with my son
and the school holidays.

577
01:02:45,375 --> 01:02:47,832
What's wrong, Sheila? You can tell us.

578
01:02:47,917 --> 01:02:52,786
Nothing! Just a few bad sleeping dreams.

579
01:02:53,667 --> 01:02:55,123
Can you give us an example?

580
01:02:56,500 --> 01:03:01,244
Well, just this one the other night,
urn...

581
01:03:02,583 --> 01:03:06,906
I was very close to my mother,
in real life, I mean.

582
01:03:07,917 --> 01:03:13,116
My father died when I was young
and she and I grew even closer.

583
01:03:13,708 --> 01:03:15,323
I loved her dearly.

584
01:03:16,583 --> 01:03:21,407
I didn't have enough space
to store all her things after she died,

585
01:03:21,500 --> 01:03:24,207
which always makes me sad.

586
01:03:24,917 --> 01:03:29,411
I gave everything to charity,
but wished I'd kept something.

587
01:03:30,583 --> 01:03:34,656
But in this sleep,
i found one of her old dresses.

588
01:03:35,208 --> 01:03:40,407
lt smelt of her perfume,
which I hadn't come across in years.

589
01:03:40,500 --> 01:03:44,163
Brought me right back,
made everything feel all right again.

590
01:03:45,292 --> 01:03:50,036
lput the dress on
and I looked in the mirror,

591
01:03:50,125 --> 01:03:51,865
but it wasn't me at all.

592
01:03:52,333 --> 01:03:54,995
It was my mother from the grave

593
01:03:55,083 --> 01:03:58,621
with the same jet-black dyed hair.

594
01:04:00,125 --> 01:04:02,741
I remember when she bought this dye.

595
01:04:02,833 --> 01:04:07,122
She was so fed up of the old ones
dripping off in the rain,

596
01:04:07,208 --> 01:04:11,907
but this one was permanent.
More than her flesh.

597
01:04:17,000 --> 01:04:22,370
I caught a bus and everyone hid
under their seats when they saw me.

598
01:04:22,458 --> 01:04:23,868
Racists.

599
01:04:23,958 --> 01:04:26,870
I stank of my mother‘s corpse.

600
01:04:27,208 --> 01:04:30,120
The stench made the driver vomit

601
01:04:31,167 --> 01:04:35,365
and we went off a cliff and I woke up.

602
01:04:40,208 --> 01:04:41,914
And what colour was the bus?

603
01:04:42,458 --> 01:04:45,450
It was the colour
of Thames Valley-on-Thames.

604
01:04:46,917 --> 01:04:49,875
Yeah, it was that colour.

605
01:04:57,875 --> 01:04:59,285
(door slams)

606
01:05:07,833 --> 01:05:10,370
I'm dropping some stuff off
at the charity shop

607
01:05:10,458 --> 01:05:12,870
if you've got anything
that needs taking.

608
01:05:14,833 --> 01:05:17,290
Is that a yes or a no?

609
01:05:17,375 --> 01:05:18,706
(Vince) Maybe!

610
01:05:19,208 --> 01:05:21,494
Well, you go on Monday, then.

611
01:05:21,583 --> 01:05:26,452
And don't forget to bring the stuff
on the back seat. Yes?

612
01:05:27,125 --> 01:05:28,160
(Vince) Yes!

613
01:05:28,250 --> 01:05:32,823
OK. I'll see you in the morning.
I've left you some food in the fridge.

614
01:05:32,917 --> 01:05:34,202
(Vince) Where are you going?

615
01:05:35,042 --> 01:05:37,033
I'm gonna stay with someone.

616
01:05:37,583 --> 01:05:39,414
(Vince) What? You mean slaphead?

617
01:05:39,500 --> 01:05:41,411
His name's Zach.

618
01:05:42,208 --> 01:05:44,164
(Vince) I thought you said
he was a mate.

619
01:05:44,250 --> 01:05:46,866
Well, he's something more than that now.

620
01:05:57,167 --> 01:06:01,957
(woman on radio) What I always do is,
because I love queueing for the sales,

621
01:06:02,042 --> 01:06:07,162
i find it really exciting,
and l have done it all night, actually.

622
01:06:07,250 --> 01:06:08,490
Yes, it's great fun.

623
01:06:08,583 --> 01:06:11,450
There's a great camaraderie, you know.

624
01:06:11,542 --> 01:06:14,249
And everybody's good.
They keep your place

625
01:06:17,833 --> 01:06:23,248
But the advice i always give,
when you go in, don't follow the crowd,

626
01:06:23,333 --> 01:06:27,030
because they all go up
the main central escalator.

627
01:06:27,750 --> 01:06:31,413
But I always dive
to the side of the store

628
01:06:31,500 --> 01:06:35,869
where i know there's another staircase
and run up there to the first floor

629
01:06:35,958 --> 01:06:40,748
because i know what I want
because l'd been the week before

630
01:06:40,833 --> 01:06:44,075
and I knew i wanted
this, you know, particular dress.

631
01:06:44,167 --> 01:06:45,953
- And there it was...
- (Sheila gasps)

632
01:06:46,625 --> 01:06:49,947
(car engine revs)

633
01:06:53,667 --> 01:06:57,364
- (screams)
- (tyres soreech)

634
01:06:58,333 --> 01:06:59,743
(screams)

635
01:07:00,667 --> 01:07:03,500
(glass smashes)

636
01:07:18,125 --> 01:07:21,242
(groans)

637
01:07:31,042 --> 01:07:32,282
(9’35”)

638
01:07:35,417 --> 01:07:36,782
(groans)

639
01:08:03,417 --> 01:08:04,907
(phone rings)

640
01:08:12,167 --> 01:08:13,623
(ringing continues)

641
01:08:21,542 --> 01:08:27,082
(Sheila, upset)
You've reached 01632 960786.

642
01:08:27,167 --> 01:08:31,240
l'm not in right now, but if you leave
a message I'll get straight back to you.

643
01:08:31,333 --> 01:08:32,413
(answerphone beeps)

644
01:08:32,500 --> 01:08:34,661
(woman) Pick up the phone,
it's the Police Force.

645
01:08:34,750 --> 01:08:36,536
Pick up the phone this instant.

646
01:08:45,125 --> 01:08:48,993
- (shop bell rings)
- (man reads football scores on radio)

647
01:08:51,583 --> 01:08:52,868
(clothes rack squeaks)

648
01:09:00,125 --> 01:09:02,537
(assistant) If you need anything,
don't hesitate to ask.

649
01:09:02,625 --> 01:09:03,956
(woman) Oh, thank you.

650
01:09:09,750 --> 01:09:11,911
Oh, that does look nice on you.

651
01:09:12,000 --> 01:09:14,537
Really? I might freeze to death in this.

652
01:09:14,625 --> 01:09:17,822
Think about your summer cruise
along the Adriatic

653
01:09:17,917 --> 01:09:19,908
with the breeze running through
that dress

654
01:09:20,000 --> 01:09:23,618
as you sip your sparkling wine
with the captain on deck.

655
01:09:28,458 --> 01:09:32,246
- (shop bell rings)
- (door closes)

656
01:09:32,333 --> 01:09:34,870
(sighs) I can't afford a cruise
this summer.

657
01:09:35,667 --> 01:09:37,749
Well, if you need any help,
just let me know.

658
01:09:37,833 --> 01:09:39,198
(woman) Thank you.

659
01:09:46,708 --> 01:09:48,744
(man) All right, mate.
Just that, please.

660
01:10:08,583 --> 01:10:13,077
Welcome to Amesos, dear guest.
My name is Sandro. And you are?

661
01:10:13,375 --> 01:10:14,956
Uh... Reg Speaks.

662
01:10:15,042 --> 01:10:16,828
(Sandro) May I take your lucky order?

663
01:10:17,625 --> 01:10:19,832
Just a kebab will be fine. And chips.

664
01:10:19,917 --> 01:10:21,623
Kebab and chips, instantly.

665
01:10:21,708 --> 01:10:26,873
Uh... Sorry, no bags on the table.
Is not nice. And drinks?

666
01:10:27,292 --> 01:10:31,956
- (men cheer)
- Reggie!

667
01:10:32,042 --> 01:10:37,241
(men chant) Down it! Down it!
Down it! Down it! Down it!

668
01:10:37,333 --> 01:10:39,289
- (cheering)
- (man) Oi, oi!

669
01:10:39,375 --> 01:10:40,535
I'm soaked!

670
01:10:40,625 --> 01:10:42,911
(man laughs)
Never mind, Reg. Never mind.

671
01:10:43,000 --> 01:10:48,540
As your best man, I come equipped,
excuse me, for every eventuality.

672
01:10:48,625 --> 01:10:52,948
You need new clothing?
Look no further. (laughs)

673
01:10:53,042 --> 01:10:55,033
I always knew you had a feminine side.

674
01:10:55,125 --> 01:10:57,992
What choice has he got with Babs around?

675
01:10:58,083 --> 01:11:01,496
Well, don'tjust look at it. I didn't
just buy it for the missus, you know!

676
01:11:01,583 --> 01:11:04,495
- I can't put it on in here.
- (mimics) "I can't put it on in here."

677
01:11:04,583 --> 01:11:05,948
- Go on, get it on.
- It won't fit me.

678
01:11:06,042 --> 01:11:08,124
It'll fit you,
don't worry about that, go on.

679
01:11:08,208 --> 01:11:10,324
Yeah, come on,
you big girl's blouse, get it on!

680
01:11:10,417 --> 01:11:13,375
- Come on, Reg! Don't let the side down!
- (laughter)

681
01:12:10,333 --> 01:12:13,905
(cheering)

682
01:12:16,458 --> 01:12:18,323
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

683
01:12:18,417 --> 01:12:21,329
- Wait, where's the dummy?
- Oi! Clipper!

684
01:12:23,458 --> 01:12:25,915
(laughter)

685
01:12:27,250 --> 01:12:28,660
(man) Speech! Speech

686
01:12:28,750 --> 01:12:33,540
(men chant) Speech! Speech! Speech!
Speech! Speech! Speech!

687
01:12:33,625 --> 01:12:36,037
Oh, you bloody tosspot.
I'll do it, all right?

688
01:12:36,125 --> 01:12:39,617
Reg here has been hanging
around my house,

689
01:12:39,708 --> 01:12:44,748
or more specifically,
my daughter's bedroom, since he was 17.

690
01:12:44,833 --> 01:12:47,074
Now we all love Reg, don't we? Don't we?

691
01:12:47,958 --> 01:12:51,701
I mean, he always gets a round in,
good at five-a-side,

692
01:12:51,792 --> 01:12:55,785
and I gotta say,
he's always good around Babs.

693
01:12:57,000 --> 01:12:58,786
And that ain't no easy task.

694
01:12:58,875 --> 01:13:00,456
- You can say that again.
- (laughter)

695
01:13:00,542 --> 01:13:03,830
But seriously,
we've got a good 'un here.

696
01:13:04,750 --> 01:13:06,331
He's solid, our Reg.

697
01:13:07,875 --> 01:13:12,323
But if you ever, ever
mess with my Babs,

698
01:13:12,417 --> 01:13:15,614
I'll take you straight down,
make no mistake. You got that?

699
01:13:16,833 --> 01:13:18,494
Steady on, Bananas.

700
01:13:18,583 --> 01:13:22,201
No, no, it has to be said.
Best to get it out of the way now.

701
01:13:22,292 --> 01:13:25,159
- Now come on, son. Give us a hug!
- (men cheer)

702
01:13:25,250 --> 01:13:30,699
- No, no, no, come on, that's enough!
- Reg Speaks! I salute you! (laughs)

703
01:13:30,792 --> 01:13:33,374
- To Reg and Babs!
- (men) To Reg and Babs!

704
01:13:33,458 --> 01:13:35,790
And here's to your first divorce!

705
01:13:35,875 --> 01:13:37,706
Oi, 0!! Less of that, all right?

706
01:13:37,792 --> 01:13:39,373
(disco music)

707
01:14:13,083 --> 01:14:15,495
(men jeering in the distance)

708
01:14:44,042 --> 01:14:46,328
(voice echoes)

709
01:14:46,417 --> 01:14:47,998
(echoing voice continues)

710
01:14:52,042 --> 01:14:53,998
(men laugh)

711
01:14:55,625 --> 01:14:59,038
(women) But he doesn't have to roll
his eyes at every suggestion I make.

712
01:14:59,125 --> 01:15:02,242
It's always this "I know better"
attitude whenever I deal with Andre.

713
01:15:02,333 --> 01:15:05,951
At this rate, I'll get Reg to DJ,
assuming he recovers.

714
01:15:06,042 --> 01:15:08,328
It's a chamber of booze
and methane in here.

715
01:15:08,417 --> 01:15:10,578
I'm surprised
it hasn't killed the canary.

716
01:15:11,917 --> 01:15:13,248
No idea.

717
01:15:14,125 --> 01:15:17,288
He'll stuff it down him and it's always
the same. He never puts on any weight.

718
01:15:17,375 --> 01:15:20,242
No idea how the jammy bastard does it.
It's so unfair.

719
01:15:20,333 --> 01:15:21,448
(canary cheeps)

720
01:15:21,750 --> 01:15:25,072
Look, let me know if Andre is willing
to be more flexible with the music

721
01:15:25,167 --> 01:15:27,704
otherwise we don't pay. Simple as that.

722
01:15:28,458 --> 01:15:30,323
Exactly. See you later.

723
01:15:41,208 --> 01:15:44,530
0!! Stop squeezing my spots, yeah?

724
01:15:44,625 --> 01:15:46,035
Knew that would wake you.

725
01:15:46,125 --> 01:15:47,831
Just ease it on, Babs.

726
01:15:47,917 --> 01:15:49,828
Good night, then?

727
01:15:50,250 --> 01:15:53,208
Wish I had a tape of you banging on
about how you weren't gonna drink.

728
01:15:53,292 --> 01:15:56,125
It's not the drink,
it's just a dirty kebab.

729
01:15:56,208 --> 01:15:59,245
Yeah, right. Don't know why
you hang outwith that lot.

730
01:15:59,333 --> 01:16:01,039
You know what they'll get you into.

731
01:16:01,125 --> 01:16:04,367
We didn't do anything.
It's just a dirty kebab.

732
01:16:04,458 --> 01:16:06,790
Dirty kebab my arse, Reg Speaks.

733
01:16:06,875 --> 01:16:09,332
All you had to do
was not accept the drinks.

734
01:16:09,417 --> 01:16:11,533
I didn't want to let the side down.

735
01:16:12,542 --> 01:16:14,373
You gonna lay in bed like that all day?

736
01:16:16,417 --> 01:16:19,159
You know Andre
now wants to do a soundcheck?

737
01:16:22,000 --> 01:16:23,240
(groans)

738
01:16:23,333 --> 01:16:25,540
What's a... What's a soundcheck?

739
01:16:25,625 --> 01:16:27,206
He wants to check all the gear.

740
01:16:27,292 --> 01:16:30,580
He says it takes three hours. It's gonna
cut right through the wedding.

741
01:16:30,667 --> 01:16:32,874
It's just playing records, innit?

742
01:16:32,958 --> 01:16:34,664
Well, you speak to him, then.

743
01:16:34,750 --> 01:16:37,412
I can't deal with
that weasel-mouthed diva any more.

744
01:16:37,500 --> 01:16:38,910
Every time I question something,

745
01:16:39,000 --> 01:16:41,662
hejust comes back at me
claiming he's a perfectionist.

746
01:16:41,750 --> 01:16:43,081
Not now, yeah?

747
01:16:45,000 --> 01:16:47,787
- What's that?
- Huh? What?

748
01:16:48,375 --> 01:16:50,707
(screwdriver clicks)

749
01:16:57,458 --> 01:17:00,495
Oi! Cottrell wants to take you on.

750
01:17:00,583 --> 01:17:02,198
(sighs) About what?

751
01:17:02,292 --> 01:17:04,123
You didn't invite him to the stag.

752
01:17:04,208 --> 01:17:07,450
But, |-| didn't think
it was his thing.

753
01:17:08,417 --> 01:17:10,408
You try telling that to Cottrell.

754
01:17:36,333 --> 01:17:38,119
Gary said you wanted to see me.

755
01:18:02,125 --> 01:18:05,822
(woman) So how Iong's it gonna take
to get that spare whatever you call it?

756
01:18:05,917 --> 01:18:09,364
- Probably about ten days.
- (woman) Ten days?

757
01:18:10,375 --> 01:18:13,367
Well, could be sooner if I can get
one of my colleagues to drop it over.

758
01:18:13,458 --> 01:18:16,200
- Too busy to do it yourself?
- I'll be on my honeymoon then.

759
01:18:16,292 --> 01:18:19,455
Honeymoon? Oh. Congratulations.

760
01:18:19,542 --> 01:18:22,500
And what's the destination? Tenerlfe?

761
01:18:22,583 --> 01:18:25,575
Uh, Lost John's Cave. Up in Lancs.

762
01:18:26,375 --> 01:18:29,082
- The wife's got a thing about caves.
- (woman) Oh.

763
01:18:29,167 --> 01:18:32,489
- Already calling her the wife?
- She's called me worse.

764
01:18:32,583 --> 01:18:34,574
And what's the wife's name?

765
01:18:35,708 --> 01:18:39,826
Her name's Babs. She works
at Ambrook's Razors, dispatch manager.

766
01:18:39,917 --> 01:18:42,954
Ambrook's? Yeah, my sister used to
go out with a bloke from Ambrook's.

767
01:18:43,042 --> 01:18:44,282
Really nice fella, too.

768
01:18:44,375 --> 01:18:46,832
Oh, that, um...
that must be Phil Keeble.

769
01:18:46,917 --> 01:18:49,283
Why? No one else nice at Ambrook's?

770
01:18:51,042 --> 01:18:52,703
What's your fiancee like?

771
01:18:53,792 --> 01:18:55,282
She's all right, yeah.

772
01:18:55,750 --> 01:18:57,240
How long have you been together?

773
01:18:57,333 --> 01:18:59,790
Fourteen, fifteen years.
Something like that.

774
01:18:59,875 --> 01:19:01,615
(woman) Why get married now?

775
01:19:02,417 --> 01:19:06,160
I dunno. It'sjust always been Babs.

776
01:19:06,583 --> 01:19:08,323
You've never been out with anyone else?

777
01:19:08,417 --> 01:19:10,703
- (Reg) No.
- Never tempted?

778
01:19:12,042 --> 01:19:13,498
Not really. It'sjust Babs.

779
01:19:13,583 --> 01:19:15,995
(woman) You're telling me
you never ever get tempted?

780
01:19:16,083 --> 01:19:19,621
You never even look at another woman
walking down the street?

781
01:19:21,792 --> 01:19:24,955
I can see there's also a problem with the
way the belt rides over the pump pulley.

782
01:19:25,042 --> 01:19:26,748
Small-talk time's up, then?

783
01:19:27,542 --> 01:19:29,749
I've got Mrs Beckley
up the road at five.

784
01:19:30,208 --> 01:19:31,573
Really?

785
01:19:33,333 --> 01:19:35,244
What's your name, young sir?

786
01:19:36,542 --> 01:19:38,453
Uh, Reg Speaks.

787
01:19:39,417 --> 01:19:41,032
Reg Speaks.

788
01:19:42,958 --> 01:19:46,030
My ex-husband used to say
he never looked at other women.

789
01:19:46,125 --> 01:19:50,073
He's probably selling the same lie
to his new wife as we speak.

790
01:19:50,625 --> 01:19:53,788
What I'd give to know what goes on
in the male mind.

791
01:19:55,000 --> 01:19:56,911
Any thoughts?

792
01:19:58,125 --> 01:20:01,288
It doesn't ride properly
over the transmission drive.

793
01:20:01,917 --> 01:20:03,532
All that tension on the belt

794
01:20:03,625 --> 01:20:06,332
is creating havoc with the washers
on the clutch shalt.

795
01:20:07,667 --> 01:20:09,908
The transmission mounting bolts
have come loose,

796
01:20:10,000 --> 01:20:12,207
which might have been
affecting the washer.

797
01:20:12,292 --> 01:20:15,910
The clutch assembly seems to have lost
connection with the low-speed solenoid,

798
01:20:16,000 --> 01:20:19,037
but I can check the motor wiring
at the transmission block.

799
01:20:19,875 --> 01:20:23,538
The agitator hub seems to be intact
along with the transmission shaft,

800
01:20:24,250 --> 01:20:27,242
but the plungers are no Iongerfitting
into the wigwags.

801
01:20:28,125 --> 01:20:30,161
If you let me have a look
at the wigwag terminals,

802
01:20:30,250 --> 01:20:32,582
I can be more specific
about the problem,

803
01:20:33,125 --> 01:20:34,114
but looking at it now,

804
01:20:34,208 --> 01:20:37,371
I can see the wigwag drive shaft
is no longer working... (voice fades)

805
01:20:37,458 --> 01:20:39,619
(no sound)

806
01:20:42,750 --> 01:20:44,741
Why did you invite Chris Dale
to the wedding?

807
01:20:44,833 --> 01:20:45,993
Not now.

808
01:20:46,083 --> 01:20:48,574
In other words,
yet another pointless guest of yours.

809
01:20:48,667 --> 01:20:51,374
- He taught me judo.
- Yeah, when you were 17

810
01:20:51,458 --> 01:20:55,030
and even then you legged it when
Roj Lines wanted your dinner money!

811
01:20:55,125 --> 01:20:58,617
Half the people on that list never
bothered to invite us to their weddings.

812
01:20:58,708 --> 01:21:00,494
And you can definitely
drop Greg and Tina.

813
01:21:00,583 --> 01:21:03,416
- Why?
- Because they invited themselves!

814
01:21:03,500 --> 01:21:06,537
Other thing with them is
that opens the door to Dave and Sarah,

815
01:21:06,625 --> 01:21:09,947
Justin and Linda, Nick and Charlie,
and Adrian and Russ.

816
01:21:10,042 --> 01:21:11,077
Invite Greg and Tina

817
01:21:11,167 --> 01:21:13,954
and you automatically
have to invite those jokers as well.

818
01:21:14,042 --> 01:21:15,327
Nip it in the bud.

819
01:21:16,500 --> 01:21:18,161
- Are you listening?
- Yes!

820
01:22:12,292 --> 01:22:13,327
(Babs) Look.

821
01:22:16,375 --> 01:22:17,410
What do you think?

822
01:22:18,958 --> 01:22:20,539
It's all right, yeah.

823
01:22:20,625 --> 01:22:22,832
Wash the stink out
and it could be all right on me.

824
01:22:23,625 --> 01:22:24,740
You like me in it?

825
01:22:24,833 --> 01:22:28,451
Yeah. Maybe try it with some tights.

826
01:22:28,917 --> 01:22:29,906
Why?

827
01:22:30,958 --> 01:22:33,916
I dunno. It's a bit nippy out there.

828
01:22:34,000 --> 01:22:36,742
I've told you a million times,
they make my legs itch.

829
01:22:36,833 --> 01:22:38,789
You don't need anything else with this.

830
01:22:38,875 --> 01:22:40,490
It's fine by itself, look.

831
01:22:41,292 --> 01:22:43,157
Where did Clipper get it from?

832
01:22:43,250 --> 01:22:45,241
Some shop or other, I dunno.

833
01:22:45,333 --> 01:22:47,119
It's a size 36.

834
01:22:48,625 --> 01:22:49,990
How come you fit into it?

835
01:22:50,083 --> 01:22:51,243
Yeah.

836
01:22:51,667 --> 01:22:53,328
- You listening?
- I like it, yeah!

837
01:22:53,417 --> 01:22:57,535
(Babs) You don't get it, do you?
How comes you fit into a size 36?

838
01:22:58,917 --> 01:23:01,374
(eerie echoing noise)

839
01:23:03,833 --> 01:23:06,540
(echoing voices)

840
01:23:09,208 --> 01:23:10,789
Reg!

841
01:23:13,583 --> 01:23:16,746
- (Reg) Not the fleece!
- It stinks! Wear the other one.

842
01:23:21,542 --> 01:23:25,330
(Mr Lundy whispers) Like a whisper
in an ocean, like a feather in a storm,

843
01:23:25,417 --> 01:23:31,162
a dress of deduction finds its character
in a prism of retail abstraction.

844
01:23:31,250 --> 01:23:34,083
(Babs) See? It's a 38 and it's tight.

845
01:23:34,167 --> 01:23:37,079
- Get a size up, then.
- (Babs) So, you think it's tight?

846
01:23:38,125 --> 01:23:41,288
No, I thought that's what you just said.

847
01:23:47,583 --> 01:23:49,119
(mutters) Bloody useless.

848
01:23:54,167 --> 01:23:55,247
(groans)

849
01:23:57,125 --> 01:23:58,160
(sighs)

850
01:24:06,917 --> 01:24:09,784
(man groans)

851
01:24:09,875 --> 01:24:15,916
Villainy! Now the horrid repercussions
will abate your rank, madam!

852
01:24:22,167 --> 01:24:23,247
You!

853
01:24:27,792 --> 01:24:30,955
(Babs) Over 45 minutes they had me
on hold and then the line goes dead.

854
01:24:31,042 --> 01:24:32,623
That's my whole lunch break gone.

855
01:24:32,708 --> 01:24:34,539
(Reg) You could've had your sandwiches
while you were on hold.

856
01:24:34,625 --> 01:24:37,162
(Babs) How am I supposed to eat
if I'm all worked up like that?

857
01:24:37,250 --> 01:24:39,491
I should've never gone
for that store card.

858
01:24:39,583 --> 01:24:42,120
All that bloody hassle
just for a stupid free umbrella

859
01:24:42,208 --> 01:24:44,199
which you ended up losing.

860
01:24:44,292 --> 01:24:46,203
Even when I went in there
to try and cancel it,

861
01:24:46,292 --> 01:24:48,453
the woman kept me waiting
for 30 minutes.

862
01:24:48,542 --> 01:24:50,533
No apology, nothing.

863
01:24:51,250 --> 01:24:52,285
Reg?

864
01:24:54,417 --> 01:24:57,989
Reg? Reg, are you listening?

865
01:24:59,333 --> 01:25:00,664
Reg?

866
01:25:04,292 --> 01:25:06,704
(woman) Let me just try this on you.

867
01:25:06,792 --> 01:25:08,123
See if it fits.

868
01:25:11,542 --> 01:25:14,579
There, that'll keep you warm and cosy.

869
01:25:15,583 --> 01:25:19,872
He's very patient, isn't he? Not like
most of the boys we get in here.

870
01:25:20,500 --> 01:25:22,206
What's your name, young sir?

871
01:25:22,292 --> 01:25:25,910
(Bab) Reginald! Get a move on
or we're going to miss the badminton.

872
01:25:28,792 --> 01:25:30,282
You need to ask Clipper
where he got it from.

873
01:25:30,375 --> 01:25:32,161
Knowing him,
it's some second-hand shop.

874
01:25:32,250 --> 01:25:33,740
(Reg) What's that got to do with it?

875
01:25:33,833 --> 01:25:36,825
(Babs) Think about it! We both got
the same rash, we both wore the dress.

876
01:25:36,917 --> 01:25:39,374
You never heard of scabies?

877
01:25:39,458 --> 01:25:42,495
Reg? Reg!

878
01:25:43,417 --> 01:25:44,702
W hat?

879
01:25:56,042 --> 01:25:59,409
- (Babs) You think we'll need a new one?
- Hopefully not. Let's see, yeah?

880
01:25:59,500 --> 01:26:02,867
- (Babs) What was wrong with it?
- Basket drive went bananas.

881
01:26:03,500 --> 01:26:04,489
The basket drive?

882
01:26:04,583 --> 01:26:08,201
Yeah, the basket drive.
Just went bananas.

883
01:26:08,292 --> 01:26:10,453
And the spin tube bearings
are knackered.

884
01:26:11,083 --> 01:26:13,415
I tried to check the clutch surface
for any damage

885
01:26:13,500 --> 01:26:16,867
and found that the rivets were
rubbing up against the clutch pulley.

886
01:26:16,958 --> 01:26:20,075
There's also the possibility
that the drain hose is kinked,

887
01:26:20,167 --> 01:26:23,955
but I can put that into writing for you
after a more thorough inspection.

888
01:26:25,042 --> 01:26:27,408
The clutch plate is no longer a plate

889
01:26:27,500 --> 01:26:31,038
and the switch striker
is neither switching nor striking.

890
01:26:31,125 --> 01:26:32,865
Ifl can get to the wigwag solenoid,

891
01:26:32,958 --> 01:26:35,791
there is a chance I can find out
why the washer didn't drain.

892
01:26:36,750 --> 01:26:40,743
The blocked pump isn't helping matters
and the agitator leaves me at a loss.

893
01:26:42,500 --> 01:26:46,539
I can also see that the wigwag terminals
are not where they're supposed to be,

894
01:26:46,625 --> 01:26:47,990
which leads me to the conclusion

895
01:26:48,083 --> 01:26:50,324
that this washing machine
is dysfunctional...

896
01:26:50,417 --> 01:26:51,827
(voice fades)

897
01:26:53,625 --> 01:26:54,990
(wind howls)

898
01:27:47,792 --> 01:27:49,157
(screwdriver clicks)

899
01:27:50,875 --> 01:27:55,164
- Oi! Cottrell's looking for you.
- What now?

900
01:27:55,250 --> 01:28:00,415
One of your neighbours reported you.
Just tell me you didn't do it.

901
01:28:00,500 --> 01:28:02,582
I had to, it was an emergency.

902
01:28:02,667 --> 01:28:04,578
You know the rules, Reg!

903
01:28:04,667 --> 01:28:08,114
You fix your own machine,
it still has to go through the books.

904
01:28:08,208 --> 01:28:12,531
- I bought my own spare parts.
- And? Who paid for your training?

905
01:28:13,792 --> 01:28:16,829
You've really let the side down,
do you know that?

906
01:28:16,917 --> 01:28:20,205
Now get in there
before Cottrell takes me on as well.

907
01:30:02,750 --> 01:30:03,785
(sniffs)

908
01:30:18,542 --> 01:30:20,908
- (Babs) I've had it with Andre.
- (door slams)

909
01:30:21,000 --> 01:30:22,206
If he vetoes one more song.

910
01:30:22,292 --> 01:30:24,908
I'm gonna stick that turntable
up his miserable backside!

911
01:30:25,000 --> 01:30:27,036
(Bananas) Where'd you learn
to talk like that?

912
01:30:27,125 --> 01:30:30,083
Oh, it's easy for you to say. You're not
the one having to deal with him.

913
01:30:30,167 --> 01:30:34,365
Every time I say no to something,
he just says, "Why? Why? Why?"

914
01:30:34,458 --> 01:30:36,790
(Reg) Maybe I can make
a compilation tape.

915
01:30:36,875 --> 01:30:39,036
- Save us a bit of money too.
- You're joking, right?

916
01:30:39,125 --> 01:30:41,491
Your record collection
wouldn't even get a flea jumping.

917
01:30:41,583 --> 01:30:44,074
Ease it on, Babs.
I'm only trying to help.

918
01:30:47,083 --> 01:30:48,698
(Babs) What's this doing down here?

919
01:30:51,042 --> 01:30:52,782
(Reg) Sorry, I didn't see that there.

920
01:30:57,750 --> 01:30:59,866
- What are you doing? They stay there.
- Why?

921
01:31:01,708 --> 01:31:02,914
(groans loudly)

922
01:31:03,292 --> 01:31:05,704
Now come in the kitchen you two.
I've got a cheesecake for you both.

923
01:31:05,792 --> 01:31:07,282
Oh, lovely. Cheers, darling.

924
01:31:11,458 --> 01:31:12,573
You're not worried?

925
01:31:13,542 --> 01:31:15,874
- About what?
- That.

926
01:31:17,333 --> 01:31:19,699
It's probably just
the washing powder we use.

927
01:31:19,792 --> 01:31:22,033
- You don't think it's scabies?
- No.

928
01:31:22,125 --> 01:31:23,865
- An allergy?
- No.

929
01:31:25,250 --> 01:31:28,617
- Something venereal?
- You tell me.

930
01:31:28,708 --> 01:31:30,915
- I haven't slept around.
- Me neither.

931
01:31:32,333 --> 01:31:34,574
- Does that mean you love me, then?
- Yeah.

932
01:31:52,042 --> 01:31:53,407
(canary cheeps)

933
01:31:56,458 --> 01:31:59,495
(wings flap frantically)

934
01:31:59,583 --> 01:32:01,164
(clattering)

935
01:32:05,542 --> 01:32:07,407
(Babs) She's asphyxiated.

936
01:32:07,500 --> 01:32:09,411
(Reg) How can a dress asphyxiate it?

937
01:32:09,500 --> 01:32:12,867
Well, how else did she die?
She's barely a year old.

938
01:32:12,958 --> 01:32:16,121
- Could be carbon monoxide.
- We'd be dead then.

939
01:32:16,208 --> 01:32:20,156
- Not if it's a small leak.
- You're scaring me now.

940
01:32:20,250 --> 01:32:22,912
I'll come back
and take a look on my lunch break.

941
01:32:23,000 --> 01:32:25,787
No way can you get home
and back in an hour.

942
01:32:28,875 --> 01:32:31,412
- If the flame turns orange, call me.
- Yeah, yeah.

943
01:32:33,292 --> 01:32:34,452
What are you doing?

944
01:32:35,333 --> 01:32:37,039
Uh... You're going to be late.

945
01:32:38,167 --> 01:32:41,705
Go! Before Cottrell shoves a firework
up your backside.

946
01:32:45,083 --> 01:32:47,870
Reg, go! I've got to do my hair.

947
01:32:53,250 --> 01:32:54,706
(Clive) Thanks for coming in, Reg.

948
01:32:54,792 --> 01:32:57,033
When our neighbour heard
you were coming in for a loan,

949
01:32:57,125 --> 01:32:59,912
- he wanted to pass on his greetings.
- Oh, who was that?

950
01:33:00,000 --> 01:33:02,116
(Clive) Mr Watlington,
your physics teacher.

951
01:33:02,208 --> 01:33:03,197
Oh, right.

952
01:33:03,292 --> 01:33:06,284
(man) He also wanted to pass on
his apologies for hitting you so often.

953
01:33:06,375 --> 01:33:07,364
It's OK.

954
01:33:07,458 --> 01:33:09,494
It was a bit of
a Reg Speaks evening, in fact.

955
01:33:09,583 --> 01:33:12,905
(chuckles) He kept telling us
about you at school,

956
01:33:13,000 --> 01:33:16,242
and to tell you the truth,
he was sad to hear about your finances

957
01:33:16,333 --> 01:33:18,244
when we showed him
your loan application.

958
01:33:18,667 --> 01:33:20,248
Now, with that in mind, of course,

959
01:33:20,333 --> 01:33:23,325
we'd love to consider
your thoughtful request.

960
01:33:23,417 --> 01:33:25,658
But given that Staverton's kicked you out,

961
01:33:25,750 --> 01:33:27,866
we're somewhat reluctant to sign it off.

962
01:33:27,958 --> 01:33:29,914
What about here?
I heard there was a job going.

963
01:33:30,000 --> 01:33:31,956
(Clive) Sorry, that's taken, I'm afraid.

964
01:33:32,042 --> 01:33:34,954
Though I did see a sign at Dentley and Sopers
saying they were looking for someone

965
01:33:35,042 --> 01:33:37,784
in the male alliance
of clothing and costume.

966
01:33:37,875 --> 01:33:39,786
No, no, but looking in the sense

967
01:33:39,875 --> 01:33:41,831
- that one of the staff has disappeared.
- Oh.

968
01:33:41,917 --> 01:33:44,750
They'rejust trying to find him.
They're not advertising a job.

969
01:33:44,833 --> 01:33:47,370
Oh, silly me. It's my mistake.

970
01:34:09,458 --> 01:34:13,326
Now, the only loan we can offer
is the deferred employment package.

971
01:34:13,417 --> 01:34:14,497
DEP.

972
01:34:14,583 --> 01:34:16,574
It's what we like to call
a motivational loan.

973
01:34:16,667 --> 01:34:18,532
It helps our customers
get back on their feet

974
01:34:18,625 --> 01:34:20,911
and back into the job market.

975
01:34:21,000 --> 01:34:22,865
With that kind of interest rate?

976
01:34:22,958 --> 01:34:24,619
That's just advisory.

977
01:34:25,917 --> 01:34:32,072
Reg, Clive and I had someone over
from Staverton's a few years back

978
01:34:32,167 --> 01:34:33,828
and we still think a lot about

979
01:34:33,917 --> 01:34:37,114
how nicely he talked us through
the whole process of fixing our machine.

980
01:34:37,208 --> 01:34:40,826
And we thought seeing as we'll be having
Reg Speaks in the room,

981
01:34:40,917 --> 01:34:43,203
maybe he could do
something similar for us?

982
01:34:44,333 --> 01:34:46,198
It would mean a lot to us, Reg.

983
01:34:46,708 --> 01:34:48,414
But there's no machine here.

984
01:34:49,000 --> 01:34:50,786
You could pretend there's one.

985
01:34:50,875 --> 01:34:52,706
(Clive) Nobody needs to know.

986
01:34:52,792 --> 01:34:54,202
But I can'tjust...

987
01:34:54,292 --> 01:34:58,240
Just try. Then we can look
at more favourable rates for you.

988
01:34:59,625 --> 01:35:00,660
It'll be fun.

989
01:35:04,625 --> 01:35:05,785
Um...

990
01:35:09,542 --> 01:35:12,579
Plungers on old machines
tend to stop retracting,

991
01:35:12,667 --> 01:35:15,124
which means a knock-on effect
with the washer.

992
01:35:17,792 --> 01:35:20,704
A-Also the belt drive had come off.

993
01:35:24,042 --> 01:35:30,322
The inlet valve might have been blocked,
but I can't verify that.

994
01:35:30,417 --> 01:35:32,157
It s-seems...

995
01:35:32,250 --> 01:35:35,617
It's OK. It's OK, Reg.
No one's forcing you.

996
01:35:37,792 --> 01:35:40,625
If it helps. we could kick it off
in a role-play scenario.

997
01:35:40,917 --> 01:35:43,829
Yeah. A lot of loan applicants
find our Tudor courtroom scenario

998
01:35:43,917 --> 01:35:45,202
puts them at ease.

999
01:35:45,292 --> 01:35:47,157
(Clive)
Clothes still needed washing then.

1000
01:35:47,250 --> 01:35:48,581
That's right. (chuckles)

1001
01:35:52,542 --> 01:35:53,873
What's the matter, Reg?

1002
01:35:53,958 --> 01:35:56,825
You spoke so clearly and nicely
when you first came in.

1003
01:35:56,917 --> 01:35:59,033
Oh, no, um, nothing.

1004
01:35:59,125 --> 01:36:02,117
I-I'm just a bit tender
these days, that's all.

1005
01:36:04,000 --> 01:36:05,115
How come?

1006
01:36:06,500 --> 01:36:11,824
Just a sleeping dream I had last night.
It's been on my mind all day.

1007
01:36:12,917 --> 01:36:14,282
(Clive) Interesting.

1008
01:36:14,375 --> 01:36:18,789
We're here for you Reg. Sometimes
it can help to discuss these things.

1009
01:36:21,542 --> 01:36:26,866
Well, Babs, my fiancee, was in labour.

1010
01:36:26,958 --> 01:36:29,916
l was late, so at that point,
the door was locked.

1011
01:36:32,542 --> 01:36:35,409
I tried to take on her pain
just to make her feel better.

1012
01:36:35,500 --> 01:36:37,616
(screams)

1013
01:36:40,333 --> 01:36:41,368
(no sound)

1014
01:36:41,458 --> 01:36:42,914
(Babs screams)

1015
01:36:46,000 --> 01:36:46,989
(no sound)

1016
01:36:47,083 --> 01:36:49,369
(Reg) I kept screaming
to show how much I cared,

1017
01:36:49,458 --> 01:36:52,120
but it just seemed to annoy everyone.

1018
01:36:53,792 --> 01:36:56,909
I kept knocking on the window
in the hope that they'd let me in.

1019
01:37:00,333 --> 01:37:02,164
(screams)

1020
01:37:02,250 --> 01:37:04,115
(no sound)

1021
01:37:05,458 --> 01:37:09,406
The baby came out of Babs in this dress
that looked exactly the same

1022
01:37:09,500 --> 01:37:11,707
as the one I wore
on my stag night at ZinZan's.

1023
01:37:12,875 --> 01:37:16,413
I wanted to wave at my little girl,
but she wasn't having it.

1024
01:37:18,125 --> 01:37:20,958
She made it clear
that i should sling my hook.

1025
01:37:21,042 --> 01:37:22,703
(no sound)

1026
01:37:27,750 --> 01:37:30,332
- (man) What was her name?
- Babs Junior.

1027
01:37:31,958 --> 01:37:32,947
Interesting.

1028
01:37:33,042 --> 01:37:36,955
Reminds me ofa dream Stash and I had
when we put the sand dunes in the wash.

1029
01:37:37,042 --> 01:37:41,456
Oh, yeah, that. Kept bypassing
the spin cycle, I remember now.

1030
01:37:42,083 --> 01:37:43,243
Was it an old machine?

1031
01:37:43,333 --> 01:37:45,790
No, no, it was brand new.
Wasn't it, Stash?

1032
01:37:45,875 --> 01:37:47,615
Yeah, very strange.

1033
01:37:47,708 --> 01:37:50,825
Did you check the belt
if it was broken or loose?

1034
01:37:50,917 --> 01:37:52,782
That could have been
the problem with it.

1035
01:37:52,875 --> 01:37:56,914
(Stash) That's what we were wondering,
but maybe it was something else.

1036
01:37:57,000 --> 01:37:58,240
What do you think, Reg?

1037
01:37:59,375 --> 01:38:02,663
It's probably a problem with the wigwag
and its rotational pull.

1038
01:38:03,375 --> 01:38:06,492
Plungers on doors
sometimes don't align with the seal,

1039
01:38:06,583 --> 01:38:08,744
but the lid switch is often to blame.

1040
01:38:09,542 --> 01:38:12,500
The inner tub
might've sustained serious dents

1041
01:38:12,583 --> 01:38:15,450
resulting in the belt drive
loosening or coming oft,

1042
01:38:16,042 --> 01:38:18,829
but that's usually a problem
with older machines.

1043
01:38:19,667 --> 01:38:23,489
The lid switch and its actuator,
the motor coupler or door lock assembly

1044
01:38:23,583 --> 01:38:27,531
are the first things to check when
a new machine bypasses the spin cycle.

1045
01:38:28,833 --> 01:38:32,200
The agitator drive shaft and spin tube
linked to the transmission

1046
01:38:32,292 --> 01:38:34,658
can come loose from the tub struts.

1047
01:38:35,333 --> 01:38:37,540
If the helix doesn't release the brake

1048
01:38:37,625 --> 01:38:40,492
and the belt tensioner
doesn't allow slippage... (voice fades)

1049
01:40:03,167 --> 01:40:04,202
Imagine,

1050
01:40:04,292 --> 01:40:08,365
trading will cease at a premature hour
on this, the twelfth day of sales.

1051
01:40:08,917 --> 01:40:11,124
There lie other boutiques
to your discernment.

1052
01:40:11,208 --> 01:40:12,414
But I'm in the store now.

1053
01:40:12,500 --> 01:40:15,867
You can't just turf me out.
Customer rules and all that.

1054
01:40:15,958 --> 01:40:18,574
You must conclude your perusal
immediately, then.

1055
01:40:18,667 --> 01:40:21,784
Excuse me? I've worked in retail.

1056
01:40:21,875 --> 01:40:23,740
Once the customer
steps through the door,

1057
01:40:23,833 --> 01:40:27,246
you see it through to the last.
That's what I had to do.

1058
01:40:27,333 --> 01:40:30,825
The doors you passed through
are doors in perpetual revolve

1059
01:40:30,917 --> 01:40:33,158
and thus not a veritable indication

1060
01:40:33,250 --> 01:40:35,787
of the time in which you thought
you might have set heel

1061
01:40:35,875 --> 01:40:39,788
in Dentley and Soper's
Trusted Department Store, mate.

1062
01:40:39,875 --> 01:40:41,331
You call those doors revolving?

1063
01:40:41,417 --> 01:40:42,452
Hm-hmm.

1064
01:40:42,542 --> 01:40:44,954
Listen, I'm here
to choose a dress, yeah?

1065
01:40:45,042 --> 01:40:48,910
Pick something up, try it on,
pay for it, and then leave you in peace.

1066
01:40:49,000 --> 01:40:52,197
By the time you've thought of another
excuse to get me out, I'll be done,

1067
01:40:52,292 --> 01:40:53,407
mate!

1068
01:40:55,167 --> 01:40:59,866
This dress. So shabby, so unkempt.

1069
01:40:59,958 --> 01:41:04,622
We have rules here about presentation,
about hygiene, about conduct.

1070
01:41:05,375 --> 01:41:07,366
A required pedigree of shopping

1071
01:41:07,458 --> 01:41:10,905
is an aspiration
we flowerfully seal to our hearts.

1072
01:41:11,000 --> 01:41:15,039
Please, return in a different dress
and we will welcome you back.

1073
01:41:15,917 --> 01:41:18,954
If you let me buy a new dress, I will.

1074
01:41:19,042 --> 01:41:20,157
(in distance) Psst!

1075
01:41:43,208 --> 01:41:48,373
I now announce you extension time.
Congratulations.

1076
01:41:49,292 --> 01:41:51,203
I never thought I'd say this,

1077
01:41:51,292 --> 01:41:53,499
but you lot could all do with
a good shag.

1078
01:41:53,625 --> 01:41:56,037
(both laugh)

1079
01:42:00,125 --> 01:42:03,743
(laughs)

1080
01:42:04,417 --> 01:42:07,864
(distorted synth music)

1081
01:43:11,625 --> 01:43:15,493
Such an intimate document
of finesse and joy.

1082
01:43:15,583 --> 01:43:18,450
Nice to see a catalogue
with ladies bigger than me for once.

1083
01:43:19,208 --> 01:43:21,950
Pray tell, your measurements would be?

1084
01:43:23,792 --> 01:43:26,408
- Guess.
- Thirty-six.

1085
01:43:27,667 --> 01:43:30,158
- Really?
- Thirty-six.

1086
01:43:31,333 --> 01:43:32,618
You're not just saying that?

1087
01:43:32,958 --> 01:43:34,118
Thirty-six.

1088
01:43:34,917 --> 01:43:39,616
Thirty-six. I had a sleeping dream
I was a size thirty-six.

1089
01:43:40,750 --> 01:43:43,116
And I went out with my friends
to ZinZan's to celebrate,

1090
01:43:43,208 --> 01:43:45,369
but it wasn't ZinZan's.

1091
01:43:46,083 --> 01:43:47,414
It was here.

1092
01:43:48,875 --> 01:43:50,365
That was where it was.

1093
01:43:51,583 --> 01:43:55,155
It was in this room
and in this catalogue.

1094
01:43:55,958 --> 01:43:59,371
Every image was of me in this slip
getting skinnier and skinnier,

1095
01:43:59,458 --> 01:44:01,414
but the measurements written next to me

1096
01:44:01,500 --> 01:44:03,036
were getting bigger and bigger.

1097
01:44:03,542 --> 01:44:05,624
I rang the staff bell for assistance.

1098
01:44:06,500 --> 01:44:08,957
Two ladies came to my aid and told me

1099
01:44:09,042 --> 01:44:10,498
to put my head between my knees

1100
01:44:10,583 --> 01:44:12,619
whilst they tried
to correct the catalogue.

1101
01:44:14,333 --> 01:44:17,370
(whispers) 36, 38.

1102
01:44:18,417 --> 01:44:19,702
(whispering)

1103
01:44:20,750 --> 01:44:22,240
36, 38.

1104
01:44:23,667 --> 01:44:25,203
36, 38.

1105
01:44:26,625 --> 01:44:28,536
36, 38.

1106
01:44:28,625 --> 01:44:30,957
(whispering)

1107
01:44:31,042 --> 01:44:32,998
(pencil scribbles)

1108
01:44:36,583 --> 01:44:39,165
(whispering continues)

1109
01:44:42,875 --> 01:44:45,116
36, 38.

1110
01:44:49,083 --> 01:44:51,119
36, 38.

1111
01:44:53,708 --> 01:44:56,074
(whispering continues)

1112
01:45:23,333 --> 01:45:24,573
(hinges creak)

1113
01:45:24,667 --> 01:45:26,032
(thud)

1114
01:45:26,917 --> 01:45:28,407
(Babs) And then they buried me.

1115
01:45:29,292 --> 01:45:31,908
Here in this Trusted Department Store.

1116
01:45:33,625 --> 01:45:35,035
And then they buried me.

1117
01:45:36,958 --> 01:45:38,198
(yawns)

1118
01:45:39,625 --> 01:45:41,616
Your changing room is waiting for you

1119
01:45:41,708 --> 01:45:46,281
and your dress to coalesce
into a simple union ofwonder.

1120
01:45:55,167 --> 01:45:57,249
(whispering)

1121
01:46:03,458 --> 01:46:05,790
(synth music)

1122
01:46:31,292 --> 01:46:33,999
(tannoy) Attention, consumers.
Attention, consumers.

1123
01:46:34,083 --> 01:46:36,039
Your shopping will conclude now.

1124
01:46:36,125 --> 01:46:39,242
Pay us for your items
and return to your houses.

1125
01:46:39,333 --> 01:46:41,449
(whispering)

1126
01:46:53,375 --> 01:46:54,410
(thud)

1127
01:46:58,458 --> 01:47:00,198
(coins jingle)

1128
01:47:02,000 --> 01:47:03,706
Thank you very much. Goodbye.

1129
01:47:03,792 --> 01:47:08,115
Goodbye to you too, dear Audrey.
(blows kiss) Fantastic.

1130
01:47:15,083 --> 01:47:18,450
There will be this asphodel blouse
and a pair of those funeral stockings.

1131
01:47:18,875 --> 01:47:20,160
Instantly!

1132
01:47:21,125 --> 01:47:24,288
Excuse me, l was here first.

1133
01:47:24,375 --> 01:47:26,036
No, you weren't.

1134
01:47:26,125 --> 01:47:29,413
Going through that tray doesn't give you
the right to bypass the queue.

1135
01:47:29,500 --> 01:47:31,365
You came here after me.

1136
01:47:31,458 --> 01:47:34,040
No, I didn't. Now if you don't mind...

1137
01:47:34,125 --> 01:47:36,582
Such fascination of marvel.

1138
01:47:36,667 --> 01:47:40,330
Its touch to the skin,
its contour on the body.

1139
01:47:40,417 --> 01:47:43,124
I will be sewed first.
There'll be this cinnamon bra.

1140
01:47:43,208 --> 01:47:45,119
Thank you very much.

1141
01:47:49,667 --> 01:47:50,998
(gasps) Ladies!

1142
01:47:52,333 --> 01:47:53,698
(gasps) Hey!

1143
01:47:54,792 --> 01:47:57,534
- (groans)
- (shoppers gasp)

1144
01:48:03,167 --> 01:48:04,703
(distant yelling)

1145
01:48:10,042 --> 01:48:11,953
- (groans)
- (shoppers gasp)

1146
01:48:12,750 --> 01:48:14,081
(screaming)

1147
01:48:16,000 --> 01:48:18,457
(synth music)

1148
01:48:34,333 --> 01:48:37,291
(shoppers yell)

1149
01:48:40,333 --> 01:48:42,039
(distant yelling)

1150
01:49:04,875 --> 01:49:06,035
(9’35”)

1151
01:49:07,250 --> 01:49:09,787
(yelling continues)

1152
01:49:09,875 --> 01:49:11,490
(woman screams)

1153
01:49:11,583 --> 01:49:12,868
(9’35”)

1154
01:49:44,958 --> 01:49:47,495
(alarm sounds)

1155
01:49:50,500 --> 01:49:53,162
(Babs pants)

1156
01:49:53,292 --> 01:49:56,489
Blame! Blame!

1157
01:49:56,583 --> 01:49:59,700
(alarm continues)

1158
01:49:59,792 --> 01:50:01,783
- (banging on door)
- (Babs yells)

1159
01:50:04,500 --> 01:50:08,869
(Luckmoore) Blame! Blame!

1160
01:50:12,208 --> 01:50:14,073
(alarm continues)

1161
01:50:17,292 --> 01:50:18,873
(tannoy) A dramatic affliction

1162
01:50:18,958 --> 01:50:21,745
has compromised
our Trusted Department Store.

1163
01:50:21,833 --> 01:50:23,698
Get out graciously.

1164
01:50:24,833 --> 01:50:26,619
(screaming)

1165
01:50:26,708 --> 01:50:31,281
A dramatic affliction has compromised
our Trusted Department Store.

1166
01:50:31,375 --> 01:50:34,867
- Get out graciously.
- (Babs cries)

1167
01:50:34,958 --> 01:50:37,370
- (alarm continues)
- (screaming)

1168
01:50:37,958 --> 01:50:40,040
A dramatic affliction has compromised

1169
01:50:40,125 --> 01:50:42,457
- our Trusted Department Store.
- (banging)

1170
01:50:42,542 --> 01:50:43,782
Get out graciously.

1171
01:50:43,875 --> 01:50:45,786
(screaming)

1172
01:50:49,125 --> 01:50:53,573
A dramatic affliction has compromised
our Trusted Department Store.

1173
01:50:53,667 --> 01:50:55,658
Get out graciously.

1174
01:50:55,750 --> 01:50:57,706
(evil laughter)

1175
01:50:59,917 --> 01:51:02,078
(distorted) A dramatic affliction
has compromised

1176
01:51:02,167 --> 01:51:04,123
our Trusted Department Store.

1177
01:51:04,208 --> 01:51:06,324
Get out graciously.

1178
01:51:06,417 --> 01:51:08,453
(evil laughter)

1179
01:51:11,125 --> 01:51:13,457
(distorted) A dramatic affliction
has compromised

1180
01:51:13,542 --> 01:51:17,706
our Trusted Department Store.
Get out graciously.

1181
01:51:17,792 --> 01:51:19,748
(evil laughter)

1182
01:51:21,875 --> 01:51:24,287
(distorted) A dramatic affliction
has compromised

1183
01:51:24,375 --> 01:51:28,414
our Trusted Department Store.
Get out graciously.

1184
01:51:28,500 --> 01:51:30,491
(evil laughter)

1185
01:51:31,875 --> 01:51:33,706
(alarm continues)

1186
01:51:35,333 --> 01:51:37,039
(distorted announcement)

1187
01:51:41,833 --> 01:51:42,913
(evil laughter)

1188
01:51:44,375 --> 01:51:46,366
(distorted announcement)

1189
01:51:51,125 --> 01:51:52,205
(evil laughter)

1190
01:51:55,750 --> 01:51:58,867
(distorted announcement)

1191
01:52:02,292 --> 01:52:03,748
(evil laughter)

1192
01:52:07,125 --> 01:52:08,706
(distorted announcement)

1193
01:52:13,667 --> 01:52:15,157
(evil laughter)

1194
01:52:26,500 --> 01:52:28,331
(sewing machine whirs)

1195
01:52:31,792 --> 01:52:33,248
(lift creaks)

1196
01:52:56,417 --> 01:52:58,078
(creaking)

1197
01:53:00,625 --> 01:53:02,957
(sewing machine whirs)

1198
01:53:04,833 --> 01:53:06,573
(creaking)

1199
01:53:06,667 --> 01:53:08,407
(sewing machine whirs)

1200
01:53:09,458 --> 01:53:11,414
(sewing machine whirs)

1201
01:53:12,500 --> 01:53:14,286
(sewing machine whirs)

1202
01:53:15,458 --> 01:53:16,948
(sewing machine whirs)

1203
01:53:29,792 --> 01:53:31,748
(glass crunches underfoot)

1204
01:53:54,000 --> 01:53:56,082
(indistinct muttering)

1205
01:54:18,583 --> 01:54:20,448
(muttering continues)

1206
01:54:47,458 --> 01:54:49,824
(muttering fades)

1207
01:58:02,000 --> 01:58:03,991
Subtitles: BTI Studios