1 00:00:01,278 --> 00:00:04,731 ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪ 2 00:00:04,898 --> 00:00:08,506 ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪ 3 00:00:08,972 --> 00:00:12,747 ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪ 4 00:00:13,014 --> 00:00:16,200 ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪ 5 00:00:16,988 --> 00:00:20,000 ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪ 6 00:00:21,096 --> 00:00:23,535 ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪ 7 00:00:24,637 --> 00:00:25,705 Ooh! 8 00:00:25,706 --> 00:00:27,309 - Mommy! - Aaaaaaah! 9 00:00:27,375 --> 00:00:29,181 - Duncan! - Duncan! 10 00:00:29,182 --> 00:00:32,192 11 00:00:33,487 --> 00:00:34,937 Okay, Dunkie, don't forget. 12 00:00:34,991 --> 00:00:38,064 - Ten and two like the hands of a clock. - The what of a what? 13 00:00:38,130 --> 00:00:40,703 Honey, kids don't know what clocks are. 14 00:00:40,769 --> 00:00:42,907 Think of it like four and one on a rotary phone. 15 00:00:42,974 --> 00:00:45,478 - Ugh! - Duncan, train! 16 00:00:52,092 --> 00:00:54,631 I made eye contact with the conductor! 17 00:00:54,697 --> 00:00:58,337 - Dunkie, pay attention! - Ugh, you have so many rules. 18 00:00:58,404 --> 00:01:01,611 Look both ways, stay awake, keep your leg inside. 19 00:01:03,147 --> 00:01:05,284 - Ugh. - You think she's tough? 20 00:01:05,351 --> 00:01:07,757 Driving with my dad was terrifying. 21 00:01:09,393 --> 00:01:12,713 Don't use your blinker! They'll know where you're going. 22 00:01:14,403 --> 00:01:17,208 Take your hands off the wheel! Use your knees, damn it. 23 00:01:17,275 --> 00:01:19,714 Don't stop for that cat! 24 00:01:19,781 --> 00:01:22,720 - Sorry, kitty! - Never apologize to a cat! 25 00:01:22,787 --> 00:01:25,358 Of all my sperm, 26 00:01:25,359 --> 00:01:28,029 I can't believe you are the one that made it. 27 00:01:30,669 --> 00:01:33,809 Your Grampy stories are hilarious. 28 00:01:35,478 --> 00:01:37,583 Can we stop and feed that old horse? 29 00:01:39,821 --> 00:01:42,827 No, little girls and horses don't mix. 30 00:01:42,893 --> 00:01:46,066 - He looks nice. - Yeah, well, so did Ted Bundy. 31 00:01:46,133 --> 00:01:48,304 Some animals are just born rotten. 32 00:01:48,370 --> 00:01:50,709 You've heard the expression. You know, 33 00:01:50,776 --> 00:01:53,213 - "Born a rotten animal." - Nobody has, Mom. 34 00:01:53,214 --> 00:01:54,984 You struggled coming up with it. 35 00:01:55,051 --> 00:01:56,721 - Duncan, leg! - Hm? 36 00:01:56,788 --> 00:02:00,394 Ah! I don't wanna die in these shorts! 37 00:02:03,651 --> 00:02:05,571 Ah, if I'm gonna get through "Of Mice and Men," 38 00:02:05,621 --> 00:02:07,381 I'm gonna need a little something, something. 39 00:02:07,405 --> 00:02:09,262 You know you're not allowed to have coffee. 40 00:02:09,329 --> 00:02:11,600 It stunts your growth and curls your hands. 41 00:02:11,667 --> 00:02:14,139 Besides, there's something about a 12-year-old girl 42 00:02:14,205 --> 00:02:16,443 with coffee that's just... tawdry. 43 00:02:16,510 --> 00:02:19,115 - Ugh, leaving, bye. - Hold on, Speedy McGee. 44 00:02:19,182 --> 00:02:21,624 - Where do you think you're going? - Movies with friends. Bye. 45 00:02:21,625 --> 00:02:24,159 Hey, wait a minute, Exit McBrexit. 46 00:02:24,225 --> 00:02:25,963 - Did you take out the trash? - No. 47 00:02:26,029 --> 00:02:27,197 - Fold your jammies? - No. 48 00:02:27,198 --> 00:02:28,466 - Take your bathy? - No. 49 00:02:28,467 --> 00:02:30,227 - Clean your earsies? - No, and I never will! 50 00:02:30,237 --> 00:02:31,439 - Bye! - Jack! 51 00:02:31,440 --> 00:02:34,379 Okay, Duncan, please just pick one chore 52 00:02:34,446 --> 00:02:36,383 - to do before you leave. - Come on, Jack. 53 00:02:36,450 --> 00:02:38,520 I don't wanna always be the bad guy. 54 00:02:38,587 --> 00:02:41,761 - Stop being such a soft touch. - Don't, Dad. 55 00:02:41,828 --> 00:02:43,196 We like that you're a soft touch. 56 00:02:43,197 --> 00:02:46,336 Soft touch Daddy! Ooh! 57 00:02:46,403 --> 00:02:49,209 I am not a soft touch. 58 00:02:49,275 --> 00:02:52,547 You heard your mother... and me. Do your chores! 59 00:02:52,548 --> 00:02:55,302 - I'm so sorry. - Fine. 60 00:02:56,256 --> 00:02:59,864 Bathy, earsy, foldy. Happy? 61 00:02:59,930 --> 00:03:02,168 Be home by 10:00. What time? 62 00:03:02,235 --> 00:03:04,305 - 10:00. - I can't hear you. 63 00:03:04,372 --> 00:03:06,209 - 10:00! - There we go. 64 00:03:06,276 --> 00:03:09,754 - Enjoy your movie, sweetie. - Don't tell me what to do! 65 00:03:13,057 --> 00:03:14,425 That was a scary movie. 66 00:03:14,426 --> 00:03:16,998 When the licensed paranormal investigator 67 00:03:17,065 --> 00:03:21,073 turned out to be unlicensed, I screamed my butt off. 68 00:03:21,139 --> 00:03:24,079 I loved that it was more than just a dumb, scary horror movie. 69 00:03:24,145 --> 00:03:25,531 It had something to say 70 00:03:25,532 --> 00:03:27,985 about how we handle death as a society. 71 00:03:27,986 --> 00:03:30,224 Yeah, my favorite part was when the ghost 72 00:03:30,291 --> 00:03:33,397 represented the guy's grief at the loss of his mother 73 00:03:33,464 --> 00:03:36,403 in that car accident when he was a child. 74 00:03:36,470 --> 00:03:38,775 Were we watching the same movie? 75 00:03:38,842 --> 00:03:42,615 Seriously, you got that? They never actually said it. 76 00:03:42,683 --> 00:03:43,616 Seemed pretty obvious. 77 00:03:43,617 --> 00:03:45,889 Let's get some Kenny Chesney cheesy fries. 78 00:03:45,956 --> 00:03:49,062 Wait, wait, go back to the ghost representing grief. 79 00:03:49,129 --> 00:03:50,699 Wolf, swap seats with me. 80 00:03:52,301 --> 00:03:54,272 Oh, her leg is touching mine! 81 00:03:56,276 --> 00:03:58,413 But angry Mom is texting me. 82 00:03:58,480 --> 00:04:00,785 What would Kenny Chesney do? 83 00:04:00,852 --> 00:04:04,693 Ignore them texts, Duncan. Mia thinks your tractor's sexy. 84 00:04:06,096 --> 00:04:09,369 Dang, my cheesy Chesney fries are mmm-mmm good. 85 00:04:17,518 --> 00:04:19,522 Jack, it's 10:30. 86 00:04:19,589 --> 00:04:22,395 - VH1's "Behind the Music" is on. - Duncan's late. 87 00:04:22,461 --> 00:04:23,981 He's either making out or bleeding out. 88 00:04:23,998 --> 00:04:26,069 - Both aren't good. - Honey, he's fine. 89 00:04:26,136 --> 00:04:28,808 And Def Leppard's drummer hasn't lost his arm yet. 90 00:04:28,875 --> 00:04:31,827 - There it goes. - Come on. We're gonna go get him. 91 00:04:33,350 --> 00:04:36,691 "He brought the muzzle of it close to the back of Lennie's head." 92 00:04:36,757 --> 00:04:38,695 Your brother broke curfew. Get in the car. 93 00:04:38,761 --> 00:04:41,399 - Can I bring my bunny book? - Sure. 94 00:04:41,466 --> 00:04:44,772 And the app also tells you what part of the movie to go pee during. 95 00:04:44,773 --> 00:04:47,011 I didn't know you were such a film buff. 96 00:04:47,078 --> 00:04:50,819 Oh, yeah. I'm an "obstute" observer of the human condition. 97 00:04:50,885 --> 00:04:53,590 Hey, when we're done eating, you want to come over to my house? 98 00:04:53,657 --> 00:04:56,096 We can watch Peacock and chill. 99 00:04:56,162 --> 00:04:58,768 Hoo-wee, Duncan, everything gets hotter 100 00:04:58,835 --> 00:05:00,337 when the sun goes down. 101 00:05:05,414 --> 00:05:07,218 Look at him. He's alive. 102 00:05:07,285 --> 00:05:09,422 That little creep left me on "read." 103 00:05:09,489 --> 00:05:11,009 Drag him out, Mom, but cheat yourself 104 00:05:11,026 --> 00:05:13,186 toward the window so I have a good shot of both of you. 105 00:05:13,210 --> 00:05:15,732 Good luck, honey. Hey, could you grab me some Funyun rings? 106 00:05:15,756 --> 00:05:19,142 I can't go in. There's a hole in my pajamas in a bad spot. 107 00:05:19,208 --> 00:05:20,476 - Go. - Me? 108 00:05:20,477 --> 00:05:21,780 But you're so much better at public scenes 109 00:05:21,781 --> 00:05:23,421 and don't care what the kids think of you. 110 00:05:23,483 --> 00:05:26,089 You're his father. Just go in and say, 111 00:05:26,090 --> 00:05:29,062 "Get your butt in the car, or I'll put it there." 112 00:05:29,128 --> 00:05:32,201 - What if he says "no?" - You don't take "no" for an answer. 113 00:05:32,268 --> 00:05:34,532 Okay. 114 00:05:36,343 --> 00:05:38,513 I'm the father. I'm the father. I'm the father. 115 00:05:38,580 --> 00:05:41,419 Are you sure your parents will be cool with me coming over? 116 00:05:41,486 --> 00:05:43,156 Actually, they're out of town. 117 00:05:43,223 --> 00:05:45,143 Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God. 118 00:05:45,167 --> 00:05:47,813 Duncan Harris, I am your father! 119 00:05:47,866 --> 00:05:49,786 Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God. 120 00:05:49,810 --> 00:05:51,439 Well, this is every teen's fantasy. 121 00:05:51,506 --> 00:05:56,649 - Duncan, you are out past curfew. - I have a good reason. 122 00:05:56,717 --> 00:06:00,624 Whoa, son, I had no idea. Sorry to bother you. 123 00:06:02,161 --> 00:06:03,998 I'm sorry, Duncan, but it's time to go. 124 00:06:04,065 --> 00:06:08,206 - Bid your friends farewell. - Calm down. I'll meet you at home later. 125 00:06:08,273 --> 00:06:10,875 - Let's roll, Mia. - But your father. 126 00:06:10,913 --> 00:06:14,193 Don't worry about him. He's a pushover. 127 00:06:16,891 --> 00:06:21,299 Hell no, you'll meet me now in here and also at home 128 00:06:21,366 --> 00:06:23,837 - 'cause that's where we're going! - Maybe you'd better go. 129 00:06:23,838 --> 00:06:25,838 My parents will be out of town again in six months. 130 00:06:25,862 --> 00:06:27,645 No, you're impressed with me tonight, 131 00:06:27,712 --> 00:06:29,415 and this may never happen again. 132 00:06:29,482 --> 00:06:32,889 Duncan Harris, I am your father! You are still my little boy, 133 00:06:32,890 --> 00:06:36,435 now get your butt in the car, or I will put it there. 134 00:06:40,872 --> 00:06:42,441 [Bleep] you, Jack! 135 00:06:42,508 --> 00:06:44,145 Oh! 136 00:06:44,212 --> 00:06:47,151 Mm, no, uh, uh... 137 00:06:49,455 --> 00:06:53,987 - Huh? - Daaaamn! 138 00:07:02,348 --> 00:07:03,985 Hm. 139 00:07:07,391 --> 00:07:09,578 - Ah! - I cannot believe 140 00:07:09,579 --> 00:07:12,081 those horrible words came out of your mouth, 141 00:07:12,101 --> 00:07:14,438 the mouth that, up until last month, 142 00:07:14,505 --> 00:07:15,841 still had two baby teeth! 143 00:07:15,842 --> 00:07:18,046 - Wait, you were just in bed. - What? 144 00:07:18,113 --> 00:07:21,787 Those are doubles we hire to attend all your school crap. 145 00:07:23,223 --> 00:07:26,062 Hey, don't forget, parent teacher conference next week. 146 00:07:28,266 --> 00:07:30,370 I gotta go. School starts in three hours. 147 00:07:30,437 --> 00:07:31,773 Oh, no, you don't. 148 00:07:31,774 --> 00:07:33,643 Look at what you've done to your father. 149 00:07:33,711 --> 00:07:37,953 - Get in the car. I'm the father. - I'm the father... 150 00:07:38,019 --> 00:07:40,758 What do you have to say for yourself, young man? 151 00:07:40,825 --> 00:07:43,463 I apologize for the toxic atmosphere. 152 00:07:43,530 --> 00:07:46,704 I fired three producers, and you can have your birthday off. 153 00:07:46,770 --> 00:07:49,876 That's a celebrity apology. It's meaningless. 154 00:07:49,943 --> 00:07:52,916 Dad kept yelling at me in front of my friends. 155 00:07:52,983 --> 00:07:55,487 I mean, if you shake a bottle of water long enough, 156 00:07:55,554 --> 00:07:58,360 - it explodes. - You mean can of soda. 157 00:07:58,426 --> 00:08:01,131 You're shaking the water, Mom! I'm out of this dump. 158 00:08:01,132 --> 00:08:02,769 You might feel like a big shot now, 159 00:08:02,836 --> 00:08:06,109 Cussy McFoulmouth, but let me tell you 160 00:08:06,175 --> 00:08:09,415 nobody's impressed, mister, nobody! 161 00:08:09,482 --> 00:08:10,917 He's impressive. 162 00:08:10,918 --> 00:08:12,320 Duncan's impressive! 163 00:08:12,321 --> 00:08:15,093 Back up, everybody. Worldstar coming through. 164 00:08:15,160 --> 00:08:18,066 That was freaking awesome, dude, 165 00:08:18,133 --> 00:08:21,172 and by freaking, I mean what you said. 166 00:08:21,974 --> 00:08:24,880 Oh, hey, Mia, sorry you had to see that last night. 167 00:08:24,946 --> 00:08:26,884 Do you still want to Peacock and chill? 168 00:08:26,950 --> 00:08:30,424 'Cause if not, I can stay home and HBO Max and wax. 169 00:08:30,490 --> 00:08:33,430 Are you kidding? Who knew you had a rebellious side? 170 00:08:33,496 --> 00:08:36,536 And who knew I was so basic that I'd be attracted to it? 171 00:08:36,602 --> 00:08:37,865 Why don't you come over tonight? 172 00:08:37,866 --> 00:08:42,272 - Maybe I will. Maybe I won't. - God, I love this you! 173 00:08:44,853 --> 00:08:47,658 Ugh, I've been nagging him for 15 years. 174 00:08:47,726 --> 00:08:50,363 Where did his anger come from? 175 00:08:50,430 --> 00:08:53,684 - Poor Mommy. - Yeah, she's going through hell. 176 00:08:53,738 --> 00:08:55,540 So here's how we exploit it. 177 00:08:55,607 --> 00:08:57,478 Duncan's giant screwup has just opened 178 00:08:57,544 --> 00:08:58,994 - the window for us. - The window? 179 00:08:59,048 --> 00:09:00,818 The parents are so upset with Duncan, 180 00:09:00,885 --> 00:09:03,022 we have 24 hours to do whatever we want 181 00:09:03,089 --> 00:09:05,093 and not get in trouble. Watch. 182 00:09:08,834 --> 00:09:12,708 - Man, that's good coffee, Mom. - Huh? Oh, thanks, yeah, 183 00:09:12,709 --> 00:09:15,514 - Hazelnut blend. - Oh. 184 00:09:15,580 --> 00:09:17,651 Mommy, Kimberly and I both have fevers, 185 00:09:17,719 --> 00:09:19,723 so we're staying home from school today, okay? 186 00:09:19,790 --> 00:09:22,661 Yeah, okay, sure. Have a good sickness. 187 00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:24,265 The window. 188 00:09:26,269 --> 00:09:27,939 Hey, Ashley, it's Duncan Harris. 189 00:09:28,006 --> 00:09:30,644 Your friend May told me your boss keeps harassing you 190 00:09:30,711 --> 00:09:32,548 to wash your hands before going back to work, 191 00:09:32,614 --> 00:09:34,064 so just want to tell him... 192 00:09:34,118 --> 00:09:35,452 ... Dave. 193 00:09:35,453 --> 00:09:36,924 And that's another 25 bucks. 194 00:09:36,990 --> 00:09:39,863 We over here making Jeremy Piven money. 195 00:09:39,930 --> 00:09:41,934 Duncan, I just read in the school paper 196 00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:43,353 what you said to your dad. 197 00:09:43,354 --> 00:09:44,706 So where'd he hit you? 198 00:09:44,773 --> 00:09:47,444 - He didn't. - Not even with his hand? 199 00:09:47,511 --> 00:09:48,847 A shoe? 200 00:09:48,848 --> 00:09:51,018 A novelty safari belt from his trip to Nigeria 201 00:09:51,085 --> 00:09:54,425 that will leave a imprint of a elephant of your ass? 202 00:09:54,491 --> 00:09:55,941 Some of his tears hit me. 203 00:09:55,962 --> 00:09:57,899 Damn, your dad sounds like a good man. 204 00:09:57,966 --> 00:10:00,604 - Oh, yeah, he's the best. - But you made him cry. 205 00:10:00,670 --> 00:10:03,475 I destroyed him. What are you getting at, Mr. Mitch? 206 00:10:03,476 --> 00:10:05,982 Duncan, all a father has is the false belief 207 00:10:06,048 --> 00:10:08,319 that he's in charge, but you grabbed his power. 208 00:10:08,386 --> 00:10:11,258 - I know it feels really good right now... - Really good. 209 00:10:11,259 --> 00:10:13,730 But who's gonna high-five you after your first kiss? 210 00:10:13,731 --> 00:10:15,099 Who's gonna fart and blame the dog? 211 00:10:15,100 --> 00:10:16,837 Who's gonna speak too long at your wedding 212 00:10:16,904 --> 00:10:18,640 when everyone just wants to drink? 213 00:10:18,707 --> 00:10:21,378 Not your good dad 'cause he's dead. You killed him. 214 00:10:21,379 --> 00:10:24,550 I still don't get what you're... Wait a minute... 215 00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:30,296 Start already. 216 00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:34,571 I get it! Thanks, tiny Duncan. 217 00:10:34,638 --> 00:10:36,342 That kid needs to get hit. 218 00:10:36,409 --> 00:10:38,847 Look, I'm Mommy on her wedding day! 219 00:10:38,914 --> 00:10:40,751 Baby Duncan's in my tummy. 220 00:10:40,818 --> 00:10:42,338 And I just joined her Pedalton class. 221 00:10:42,362 --> 00:10:44,061 I see "Shrink my Fannie Annie" 222 00:10:44,062 --> 00:10:45,760 from Oakdale's with us today. 223 00:10:45,761 --> 00:10:47,966 Who's ready for their revenge body? 224 00:10:48,032 --> 00:10:49,482 I am, Brendan. 225 00:10:50,570 --> 00:10:53,076 I found chocolate syrup under Mommy's bed. 226 00:10:53,142 --> 00:10:54,846 That's a weird place to keep it. 227 00:10:54,913 --> 00:10:58,019 Oh, well. I'm eating for two. 228 00:10:58,086 --> 00:10:58,753 Faster, bitch! 229 00:10:58,754 --> 00:11:01,726 Your husband works too hard for you to look like that. 230 00:11:01,727 --> 00:11:04,298 I'm not wasting our window on this fat-shamer. 231 00:11:04,365 --> 00:11:07,738 - Let's go have some unsupervised fun. - Yeah! 232 00:11:07,739 --> 00:11:10,268 ♪ I don't care ♪ 233 00:11:10,422 --> 00:11:11,779 ♪ I love it ♪ 234 00:11:11,780 --> 00:11:13,549 ♪ I don't care ♪ 235 00:11:16,622 --> 00:11:18,593 ♪ I got this feeling on the summer day ♪ 236 00:11:18,659 --> 00:11:21,064 ♪ When you were gone ♪ 237 00:11:21,065 --> 00:11:22,545 ♪ I crashed my car into the bridge ♪ 238 00:11:22,601 --> 00:11:24,361 ♪ Into the bridge, I watched, I let it burn ♪ 239 00:11:24,385 --> 00:11:26,710 ♪ I threw your... into a bag and pushed... ♪ 240 00:11:26,777 --> 00:11:28,747 ♪ Just yesterday ♪ 241 00:11:28,814 --> 00:11:30,483 ♪ I swaddled you ♪ 242 00:11:30,550 --> 00:11:32,822 ♪ I coddled you ♪ 243 00:11:32,889 --> 00:11:36,095 ♪ Then you F-bombed my heart ♪ 244 00:11:37,464 --> 00:11:40,153 Oh, hey, Dad, Mr. Mitch and I thought 245 00:11:40,154 --> 00:11:42,741 about what I said, and I'm really sorry, 246 00:11:42,742 --> 00:11:44,010 and I'm ready for my punishment. 247 00:11:44,011 --> 00:11:45,915 You don't own an elephant belt, do you? 248 00:11:45,981 --> 00:11:47,885 You're gonna wish we owned an elephant belt 249 00:11:47,952 --> 00:11:49,756 when you hear your punishment. 250 00:11:49,823 --> 00:11:53,162 - Tell him what he's lost, Jack! - I-I think he's learned his lesson. 251 00:11:53,229 --> 00:11:56,870 He's learned nothing! Duncan crossed a line. 252 00:11:56,937 --> 00:11:59,441 He's gone from rad to radicalized. 253 00:11:59,508 --> 00:12:01,045 Yeah, Dad, you have to punish me, 254 00:12:01,112 --> 00:12:03,951 or else you won't bore people at my wedding. 255 00:12:04,017 --> 00:12:06,322 You know, um, sometimes the best punishment 256 00:12:06,388 --> 00:12:10,731 - is no punishment. - Where are you getting this stuff, AOC? 257 00:12:10,798 --> 00:12:13,569 - Punish your son. - Yeah, punish me, Dad. 258 00:12:13,636 --> 00:12:14,859 Smash that guitar over my head 259 00:12:14,860 --> 00:12:16,609 - like in cartoons. - No! 260 00:12:16,676 --> 00:12:17,711 Why not? 261 00:12:17,712 --> 00:12:19,688 Because I respect you for saying what I never had 262 00:12:19,772 --> 00:12:22,024 the guts to say to my father! 263 00:12:23,957 --> 00:12:27,164 Do... uh, do you want me to tell you the story? 264 00:12:27,832 --> 00:12:29,282 - Yeah, sure. - Okay. 265 00:12:29,301 --> 00:12:32,040 One day, when I was still trying to get my band going 266 00:12:32,107 --> 00:12:35,246 and working a part-time job, he came to my work. 267 00:12:36,182 --> 00:12:40,623 - Sorry to interrupt you and your date. - Need something, Dad? 268 00:12:40,691 --> 00:12:42,360 So this is the job you took 269 00:12:42,427 --> 00:12:43,897 instead of working with your old man 270 00:12:43,964 --> 00:12:47,204 - at the dog food factory. - Let's not do this here. 271 00:12:47,270 --> 00:12:49,341 Why? You gonna cry? 272 00:12:49,408 --> 00:12:51,612 Dad, those are for display only. 273 00:12:51,680 --> 00:12:54,407 Oh, tough guy, eh? 274 00:12:55,486 --> 00:12:58,760 - Knock it off! - You gonna cry, rock star? 275 00:12:58,827 --> 00:13:01,065 You gonna run home to your ukulele 276 00:13:01,131 --> 00:13:04,972 - and write a song about me? - It's a guitar! 277 00:13:04,973 --> 00:13:08,714 That's not a guitar. Hank Williams plays a guitar. 278 00:13:08,780 --> 00:13:11,619 - You know what, Dad?! - What? 279 00:13:11,686 --> 00:13:14,324 Mm... I'm going on my break! 280 00:13:14,391 --> 00:13:16,629 Oh, and happy birthday! 281 00:13:16,696 --> 00:13:19,067 That was the day I should have said it to him, 282 00:13:19,134 --> 00:13:21,372 but I didn't have your guts, Duncan. 283 00:13:21,438 --> 00:13:23,810 Plus I was afraid he'd knock me through a window. 284 00:13:23,877 --> 00:13:26,248 Oh, honey, it's never too late 285 00:13:26,315 --> 00:13:28,820 to say something hateful to someone you love. 286 00:13:28,887 --> 00:13:32,026 Duncan, when you said it to me, how did it feel? 287 00:13:32,027 --> 00:13:34,866 Honestly, like cool grass under your feet 288 00:13:34,932 --> 00:13:38,105 - on a hot summer day. - I love that feeling! 289 00:13:38,172 --> 00:13:40,767 Too bad I missed my chance. 290 00:13:41,927 --> 00:13:45,805 Alright! Mm. 291 00:13:46,923 --> 00:13:51,298 No, Dad, we're doing this, and I will be your amoral support. 292 00:13:53,035 --> 00:13:56,341 - Mom, you want in on this action? - No, but take video. 293 00:13:56,342 --> 00:13:58,379 I have to keep an eye on your sisters. 294 00:13:58,446 --> 00:13:59,896 Wait, where are they, anyway? 295 00:13:59,949 --> 00:14:02,345 Dracarys. 296 00:14:05,357 --> 00:14:07,737 Let's go yell at my father! 297 00:14:07,772 --> 00:14:10,329 - Dad and Duncan made up. - Aww, that's nice. 298 00:14:10,396 --> 00:14:13,002 No, Jing, that means the window is closing. 299 00:14:13,068 --> 00:14:14,671 Oh, that sucks! 300 00:14:14,738 --> 00:14:16,675 We can only get away with one more thing. 301 00:14:16,742 --> 00:14:18,947 What have we always wanted to do, 302 00:14:19,014 --> 00:14:21,018 but Mom always says no? 303 00:14:21,084 --> 00:14:22,386 Feed the horsey. 304 00:14:22,387 --> 00:14:24,224 I was gonna say Post Malone our faces, 305 00:14:24,291 --> 00:14:26,161 but we walked all the way here. 306 00:14:26,228 --> 00:14:29,294 ♪ Train kept a-rolling all night long ♪ 307 00:14:29,318 --> 00:14:31,638 ♪ Train kept a-rolling all night long ♪ 308 00:14:31,705 --> 00:14:35,546 Hey! If I'm gonna swear at my dad, I need my pump up music. 309 00:14:35,613 --> 00:14:39,119 We've been sitting outside Grampy's place for an hour. 310 00:14:39,120 --> 00:14:41,258 - Are we doing this or what? - Not yet. 311 00:14:41,325 --> 00:14:42,759 ♪ But I just couldn't tell her ♪ 312 00:14:42,760 --> 00:14:45,279 ♪ No, no, no, no, no ♪ Okay, I'm ready. 313 00:14:49,274 --> 00:14:51,044 I am here to see Dick Harris. 314 00:14:51,111 --> 00:14:52,747 Jackie! 315 00:14:54,952 --> 00:14:57,624 So good to see you, son. 316 00:14:57,690 --> 00:15:01,131 Do it, Dad. End his old ass. 317 00:15:02,533 --> 00:15:04,036 Aw, he wants us to get on. 318 00:15:04,037 --> 00:15:07,056 Do you think we should? Huh? 319 00:15:07,076 --> 00:15:09,481 Yee-haw! Is that right? 320 00:15:09,547 --> 00:15:13,055 And now time to enjoy my post-workout snack 321 00:15:13,122 --> 00:15:14,959 of carrots and sugar cubes. 322 00:15:15,026 --> 00:15:16,896 Hmm, hm. 323 00:15:18,666 --> 00:15:21,138 What the? Kimberly, Jing! 324 00:15:21,204 --> 00:15:23,709 That horse! 325 00:15:23,776 --> 00:15:27,383 And let's not forget your dad and that damn guitar. 326 00:15:27,450 --> 00:15:30,723 - Here we go. - Lock and load that F-bomb. 327 00:15:30,790 --> 00:15:34,030 He played that damn thing so well, 328 00:15:34,097 --> 00:15:37,503 - a regular Hank Williams. - You used to hate my guitar. 329 00:15:37,570 --> 00:15:39,774 You backed over it with your Bonneville. 330 00:15:39,842 --> 00:15:41,411 Ah, I was jealous. 331 00:15:41,478 --> 00:15:44,200 I had the handsomest, most talented kid and I was 332 00:15:44,201 --> 00:15:46,923 a nothing who ground bird beaks into dog food. 333 00:15:46,989 --> 00:15:49,561 I was tearing you down to build myself up. 334 00:15:49,627 --> 00:15:53,135 Heck, if I was you, I'd be telling me off right now. 335 00:15:54,471 --> 00:15:58,112 Actually, Dad, there is something I need to say. 336 00:15:58,178 --> 00:15:59,346 What? 337 00:15:59,347 --> 00:16:02,687 Mm... 338 00:16:02,754 --> 00:16:04,959 F... 339 00:16:05,025 --> 00:16:08,621 - father, I love you! - That's my boy. 340 00:16:08,656 --> 00:16:10,136 Ugh, I didn't listen to that train song 341 00:16:10,202 --> 00:16:14,210 six times for this. I'm grabbing a frosty N-Shure. 342 00:16:14,277 --> 00:16:16,381 He's so beautiful. 343 00:16:16,448 --> 00:16:18,185 I'm gonna call him Princess Jing 344 00:16:18,252 --> 00:16:20,656 - like Daddy's guitar. - He's not mean. 345 00:16:20,723 --> 00:16:22,460 What else is Mom lying about? 346 00:16:22,527 --> 00:16:24,407 I'll bet I can't get pregnant on the first time. 347 00:16:24,431 --> 00:16:27,569 No way, and I'm gonna touch that fence by the power plant. 348 00:16:29,007 --> 00:16:31,278 Girls, get off that horse! It's dangerous! 349 00:16:31,344 --> 00:16:33,282 You're a liar, Mom! Go away! 350 00:16:33,348 --> 00:16:35,586 Yeah, you're crazy, lady! 351 00:16:35,653 --> 00:16:36,453 Oh, ah! 352 00:16:36,454 --> 00:16:39,627 - Whoa! - Ah, I'm sorry, Mommy! 353 00:16:39,694 --> 00:16:42,433 - Save us! - Yeah, help us, lady! 354 00:16:42,500 --> 00:16:45,994 Stand down, Officer Maple Bar. 355 00:16:47,043 --> 00:16:49,714 - Officer Maple Bar? - You know this horse? 356 00:16:49,781 --> 00:16:51,231 We used to work together. 357 00:16:54,691 --> 00:16:57,563 Until one day, I was given the choice 358 00:16:57,630 --> 00:17:01,873 of keeping the horse or taking a new electric cart. 359 00:17:01,939 --> 00:17:04,758 I loved Maple Bar more than anything in the world. 360 00:17:04,777 --> 00:17:07,149 He even saved my life once, 361 00:17:07,216 --> 00:17:10,416 but the cart had a cupholder, so I chose the cart. 362 00:17:14,837 --> 00:17:17,236 You traded him for a cupholder? 363 00:17:17,303 --> 00:17:21,077 - You're the rotten animal! - I'm so sorry, Maple Bar. 364 00:17:21,144 --> 00:17:23,983 Come on, it's a hot day. Let me give you some water. 365 00:17:27,423 --> 00:17:29,995 Maple Bar, no! You were my maid of honor! 366 00:17:35,406 --> 00:17:38,947 I don't blame him. I put the cart before the horse. 367 00:17:40,382 --> 00:17:42,186 Gosh, that's funny! 368 00:17:42,253 --> 00:17:47,029 I made a funny joke by accident. I did an improv! 369 00:17:47,096 --> 00:17:49,067 Sorry we exploited you being mad at Duncan 370 00:17:49,133 --> 00:17:53,008 - to nearly kill ourselves. - Can you ever forgive us? 371 00:17:53,075 --> 00:17:55,612 I can always forgive, but I never forget, 372 00:17:55,679 --> 00:17:58,118 which means I never really forgive. 373 00:18:00,456 --> 00:18:02,326 You done all right for yourself, son. 374 00:18:02,393 --> 00:18:04,464 Beautiful family, your own business, 375 00:18:04,530 --> 00:18:06,768 ponytail Seabiscuit would kill for. 376 00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:09,807 Did you hear that? He accepts us. 377 00:18:09,875 --> 00:18:11,411 Eh. 378 00:18:11,478 --> 00:18:13,382 Where's that damn nurse with my meds? 379 00:18:13,448 --> 00:18:15,519 Hey, where'd the twinkle in your eye go? 380 00:18:15,586 --> 00:18:19,360 - Jackie, can you do me a solid? - Anything for you, Pop. 381 00:18:19,427 --> 00:18:21,197 Change your old man's diaper. 382 00:18:21,264 --> 00:18:23,135 - Whoa, what? - Oh, come on. 383 00:18:23,201 --> 00:18:24,504 When your diaper needed changing, 384 00:18:24,505 --> 00:18:25,955 who made your mom do it? 385 00:18:26,007 --> 00:18:27,911 Oh, never mind. I'll just stew in it. 386 00:18:27,978 --> 00:18:33,783 No, Pop, I won't let you stew in anything besides my love. 387 00:18:36,394 --> 00:18:39,835 Strawberry, butter pecan, banana nut... 388 00:18:39,902 --> 00:18:41,717 man, dying people have the life. 389 00:18:41,752 --> 00:18:43,809 Hey, kid, would you mind giving your grandfather 390 00:18:43,876 --> 00:18:46,447 this pill for his back pain? We're going on strike. 391 00:18:46,448 --> 00:18:48,819 - Sure, no prob and good luck. - Thanks. 392 00:18:48,886 --> 00:18:50,556 Get this to your grandpa soon. 393 00:18:50,622 --> 00:18:52,827 His meds are the only thing keeping him nice 394 00:18:52,894 --> 00:18:55,583 - 'cause when they wear off... - He's a mean, old man 395 00:18:55,584 --> 00:18:58,404 who thinks it's fun to make his son cry? 396 00:18:58,405 --> 00:19:00,859 That's our Dick! 397 00:19:01,444 --> 00:19:03,715 Oh, no, Dad thinks his father loves him! 398 00:19:05,252 --> 00:19:08,993 Dad, you're supposed to take the peanuts out of the shell. 399 00:19:09,060 --> 00:19:11,664 I paid for the shell. I'm gonna eat the shell. 400 00:19:11,731 --> 00:19:13,668 Now hurry up. It's cold, you idiot. 401 00:19:13,735 --> 00:19:16,474 Are you criticizing me while I'm doing 402 00:19:16,541 --> 00:19:19,915 the most loving, disgusting thing a child can do for his father? 403 00:19:19,982 --> 00:19:22,086 Dad, Dad, don't fall for his praise. 404 00:19:22,153 --> 00:19:24,557 - His meds make him... - what the...? 405 00:19:24,624 --> 00:19:25,993 Look away! 406 00:19:27,696 --> 00:19:30,837 Oh, Jackie, you'll do anything to feel loved. 407 00:19:30,904 --> 00:19:33,441 You didn't mean those nice things you said? 408 00:19:33,508 --> 00:19:36,481 And changing you, that was just to humiliate me? 409 00:19:36,548 --> 00:19:39,487 Aww, you gonna cry about it, rock star? 410 00:19:39,554 --> 00:19:41,691 - Say it, Dad! - Say what? 411 00:19:41,758 --> 00:19:45,232 Your dad's not man enough. Why don't you tell me, Slumpy? 412 00:19:45,299 --> 00:19:46,936 Huh? 413 00:19:47,002 --> 00:19:48,705 Ugh. 414 00:19:52,213 --> 00:19:54,050 Start already! 415 00:19:56,154 --> 00:20:00,309 - [Bleep] you, Dick! - Huh? 416 00:20:06,741 --> 00:20:08,191 - Oh! - Ah, ugh! 417 00:20:09,080 --> 00:20:10,081 Oh! 418 00:20:10,082 --> 00:20:12,619 ♪ Train kept a-rolling all night long ♪ 419 00:20:12,620 --> 00:20:15,158 ♪ Train kept a-rolling all night long ♪ 420 00:20:15,225 --> 00:20:16,694 You were right, son! 421 00:20:16,761 --> 00:20:19,567 Cool grass on a hot summer day! 422 00:20:19,634 --> 00:20:21,337 You're the best dad ever! 423 00:20:21,404 --> 00:20:25,512 I promise I will put you in a nicer home than that one. 424 00:20:25,579 --> 00:20:28,418 - Duncan, train! - Yeah, kept a-rolling! 425 00:20:28,485 --> 00:20:30,455 No, train! 426 00:20:32,092 --> 00:20:33,294 Ten and two. 427 00:20:34,530 --> 00:20:38,238 - Whoo! - Yeah! 428 00:20:38,305 --> 00:20:40,475 ♪ Well, get along ♪ 429 00:20:40,542 --> 00:20:43,110 ♪ Sweet little woman get along ♪ 430 00:20:48,525 --> 00:20:50,952 Ooh! Hit me. 431 00:20:54,177 --> 00:20:57,382 - That B12's got a kick. - Yeah, sneaks up on you. 432 00:20:59,053 --> 00:21:01,491 It's Mia. She wants to know if I'm up. 433 00:21:01,558 --> 00:21:04,898 - Ugh, I hate being grounded. - Hey, I blocked you once. 434 00:21:04,965 --> 00:21:07,536 Go to Mia's. I'll cover for you. 435 00:21:07,603 --> 00:21:09,440 Thanks, Dad. 436 00:21:09,507 --> 00:21:11,705 You rock! 437 00:21:12,279 --> 00:21:13,729 Okay, you're up! 438 00:21:19,493 --> 00:21:21,391 Slump over a little bit more. 439 00:21:23,501 --> 00:21:26,838 Aww, my sweet boys. 440 00:21:33,942 --> 00:21:36,907