1 00:00:02,920 --> 00:00:03,962 Jian-Yang, are-- are you copying 2 00:00:03,962 --> 00:00:06,044 all those companies for the Chinese markets? 3 00:00:06,670 --> 00:00:08,503 -Oh, no. ♪ 4 00:00:09,753 --> 00:00:11,336 RICHARD HENDRICKS: Are you suggesting that 5 00:00:11,336 --> 00:00:14,044 someone in here is leaking info to Gavin Belson? 6 00:00:14,044 --> 00:00:15,878 Tell me about these... fridges. 7 00:00:15,878 --> 00:00:17,420 It's a company secret. 8 00:00:17,420 --> 00:00:19,795 Do you want to save a fortune, or not? 9 00:00:19,795 --> 00:00:20,670 Well, yes. 10 00:00:20,962 --> 00:00:22,920 In exchange, I need you to do something for me, 11 00:00:22,920 --> 00:00:25,128 with regard to the people who hacked your refrigerators. 12 00:00:25,378 --> 00:00:27,044 I'm going to destroy their lives. 13 00:00:27,628 --> 00:00:30,962 Jared, do you think it's... time we hire a COO? 14 00:00:30,962 --> 00:00:32,837 You're 20-30 pounds underweight. 15 00:00:32,837 --> 00:00:34,086 Don't worry about him. 16 00:00:34,086 --> 00:00:36,128 We're gonna find you a much better COO. 17 00:00:36,753 --> 00:00:37,920 You want the job? 18 00:00:38,503 --> 00:00:41,420 -All right-- Ugh. All right. 19 00:00:49,086 --> 00:00:51,586 Okay, everybody, um, thanks for coming. 20 00:00:51,586 --> 00:00:52,920 Uh, sorry about the venue. 21 00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:55,420 We had a minor security issue. 22 00:00:55,420 --> 00:00:56,670 I didn't feel comfortable 23 00:00:56,670 --> 00:00:58,336 hosting you guys at-- at our offices. 24 00:00:58,336 --> 00:01:00,211 But, hey, at least out here, 25 00:01:00,211 --> 00:01:01,586 we don't run the risk 26 00:01:01,586 --> 00:01:03,586 of running into anyone from the tech industry. 27 00:01:03,586 --> 00:01:05,962 Yeah, they're all so old. 28 00:01:05,962 --> 00:01:08,044 But they look so happy. Yeah. 29 00:01:08,044 --> 00:01:09,545 Richard: It's weird. 30 00:01:09,545 --> 00:01:11,503 I don't understand it either. 31 00:01:11,503 --> 00:01:13,336 Anyway, I wanted you guys to meet, 32 00:01:13,336 --> 00:01:16,294 because despite being a very diverse 33 00:01:16,294 --> 00:01:18,878 and talented group of young web developers-- 34 00:01:18,878 --> 00:01:22,003 Goodscape, huh? Social coding platform. 35 00:01:22,003 --> 00:01:24,044 Tholio, analytics firm. 36 00:01:24,044 --> 00:01:25,712 Plucky, music streaming. 37 00:01:25,712 --> 00:01:27,211 FirstSight, dating site. 38 00:01:27,211 --> 00:01:28,712 Gay dating site. 39 00:01:28,712 --> 00:01:31,378 Okay, technically, you're a dating site, 40 00:01:31,378 --> 00:01:33,378 but specifically, a gay one. 41 00:01:33,378 --> 00:01:35,503 Which is a subset, so I'm not wrong. 42 00:01:35,503 --> 00:01:37,795 Anyway, uh, despite all our differences, 43 00:01:37,795 --> 00:01:40,253 we all have one thing in common, right? 44 00:01:40,253 --> 00:01:42,169 A signed agreement with me 45 00:01:42,169 --> 00:01:44,712 to build and launch your websites, 46 00:01:44,712 --> 00:01:47,878 not on the tired, bloated, old web, 47 00:01:47,878 --> 00:01:51,128 but on the new Internet of the future. 48 00:01:51,128 --> 00:01:52,503 The Pipernet. 49 00:01:52,503 --> 00:01:55,461 Which is why, from this day forward, 50 00:01:55,461 --> 00:01:57,461 I'm going to be naming the eight of you... 51 00:01:57,461 --> 00:01:59,044 the OctoPipers. 52 00:02:02,003 --> 00:02:03,545 Until something better, TBD. 53 00:02:03,545 --> 00:02:04,837 So when can we tell people? 54 00:02:04,837 --> 00:02:06,253 Soon! Actually, very soon. 55 00:02:06,253 --> 00:02:09,837 Uh, next Tuesday, Gavin Belson is, uh... 56 00:02:09,837 --> 00:02:11,336 launching his Box Three. 57 00:02:11,336 --> 00:02:13,336 So, um, the day before, 58 00:02:13,336 --> 00:02:16,712 we are going to announce our partnerships with you all, 59 00:02:16,712 --> 00:02:18,211 and beat him to the punch. 60 00:02:18,211 --> 00:02:20,128 Shit. He's gonna be super pissed. 61 00:02:20,128 --> 00:02:21,753 Man: He's really gonna come after us. 62 00:02:21,753 --> 00:02:24,044 Yeah, he is, but fuck him. 63 00:02:24,044 --> 00:02:25,586 Not butt fuck him. 64 00:02:25,586 --> 00:02:27,503 Just... You don't have to explain 65 00:02:27,503 --> 00:02:29,545 that kinda stuff. I-I know what you mean. 66 00:02:29,545 --> 00:02:31,420 Yeah, I know. Look-- look. 67 00:02:31,420 --> 00:02:33,420 As long as we stick together, 68 00:02:33,420 --> 00:02:35,586 and support each other, we can crush him. 69 00:02:35,586 --> 00:02:38,003 Because what we are doing is amazing, okay? 70 00:02:38,003 --> 00:02:40,211 We are building the world's first truly open, 71 00:02:40,211 --> 00:02:43,294 truly free de-centralized Internet. 72 00:02:43,294 --> 00:02:46,753 And I tell you what, I got a sneak preview for you guys, okay? 73 00:02:46,753 --> 00:02:48,420 Because as of this morning, 74 00:02:48,420 --> 00:02:51,628 messaging is live. What! 75 00:02:51,628 --> 00:02:53,503 Cool. Yeah. 76 00:02:53,503 --> 00:02:54,962 Really? So cool! 77 00:02:54,962 --> 00:02:56,545 So... 78 00:02:56,545 --> 00:02:58,795 right now, I will send to you all 79 00:02:58,795 --> 00:03:00,294 the very first message 80 00:03:00,294 --> 00:03:04,086 ever to be sent on a de-centralized, peer-to-peer Internet. 81 00:03:04,086 --> 00:03:05,795 Ready? 82 00:03:07,253 --> 00:03:08,962 "Hit her." 83 00:03:08,962 --> 00:03:11,795 I don't get it. Are you talking about me? 84 00:03:11,795 --> 00:03:13,128 I meant to say "Hi there." 85 00:03:13,128 --> 00:03:15,461 Well, it definitely says "Hit her." 86 00:03:15,461 --> 00:03:17,294 I'll try it again. There's a new one. 87 00:03:17,294 --> 00:03:18,920 There. "Hi there." 88 00:03:18,920 --> 00:03:20,837 "Hi there, Hitler." 89 00:03:20,837 --> 00:03:21,962 Goddammit. 90 00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:24,169 Hey, Richard? 91 00:03:24,169 --> 00:03:25,461 You don't have any issue with us 92 00:03:25,461 --> 00:03:27,962 being an exclusively gay site, do you? 93 00:03:27,962 --> 00:03:28,962 What? No! 94 00:03:28,962 --> 00:03:30,628 No, it's-- it's totally cool. 95 00:03:30,628 --> 00:03:33,670 Oh! Wait a minute, no, I don't mean you are anti-gay. 96 00:03:33,670 --> 00:03:35,169 I mean the opposite. Like, are you worried 97 00:03:35,169 --> 00:03:37,086 that we're excluding straight people? 98 00:03:37,086 --> 00:03:38,336 Oh. I just remember you said, 99 00:03:38,336 --> 00:03:40,753 you want your new Internet to be open for everybody, 100 00:03:40,753 --> 00:03:43,628 and, you know, I just want to make sure we're jibing with your vision. 101 00:03:43,628 --> 00:03:46,128 Deedee, we are psyched to have you aboard. 102 00:03:46,128 --> 00:03:48,461 Exclude all the straight people you want. 103 00:03:48,461 --> 00:03:49,628 You sure? Yep. 104 00:03:49,628 --> 00:03:51,586 Because we're not snobs about it. 105 00:03:51,586 --> 00:03:53,003 I mean, between you and me, 106 00:03:53,003 --> 00:03:54,169 I'm dreadfully boring. 107 00:03:54,169 --> 00:03:56,253 I might as well be straight myself. 108 00:03:56,253 --> 00:03:58,128 I've been with the same man for seven years. 109 00:03:58,128 --> 00:03:59,586 I go to church every Sunday. 110 00:03:59,586 --> 00:04:00,670 Look, it-- it's all good. 111 00:04:00,670 --> 00:04:03,461 FirstSight is a gay dating site. 112 00:04:03,461 --> 00:04:06,211 And-- and I will sing it from the rooftops. 113 00:04:06,211 --> 00:04:07,420 Alright, well, thank you, Richard. 114 00:04:07,420 --> 00:04:08,670 I think this is gonna be great. 115 00:04:08,670 --> 00:04:09,878 Cool. 116 00:04:11,461 --> 00:04:12,795 Yeah. Okay. 117 00:04:12,795 --> 00:04:14,712 Don't be weird. I didn't know what we'd be doing. 118 00:04:14,712 --> 00:04:16,712 ♪ ♪ 119 00:04:19,461 --> 00:04:20,962 Richard: So... 120 00:04:20,962 --> 00:04:22,795 everybody is very psyched. 121 00:04:22,795 --> 00:04:24,878 You know who else is psyched? I'll give you a hint. 122 00:04:24,878 --> 00:04:27,837 They have four thumbs, and they are these two guys. 123 00:04:27,837 --> 00:04:30,003 I am very excited. I am giddy! 124 00:04:30,003 --> 00:04:31,712 Okay, what-- what happened? 125 00:04:31,712 --> 00:04:33,712 We found the mole. 126 00:04:33,712 --> 00:04:35,003 What? Yeah. 127 00:04:35,003 --> 00:04:36,294 Who 128 00:04:36,294 --> 00:04:38,003 Good old-fashioned police work. 129 00:04:38,003 --> 00:04:41,169 I skimmed through all 40,000 of the staff's outgoing emails. 130 00:04:41,169 --> 00:04:42,712 Yeah? And in addition to learning 131 00:04:42,712 --> 00:04:44,920 that we need to revise the office dating policy, 132 00:04:44,920 --> 00:04:47,545 because it is, essentially, the Olympic Village out there, 133 00:04:47,545 --> 00:04:49,628 I learned that someone has been sending 134 00:04:49,628 --> 00:04:51,211 a number of encrypted messages 135 00:04:51,211 --> 00:04:53,503 but using Gilfoyle's purloined NSA tools-- 136 00:04:53,503 --> 00:04:56,586 I can't hold this smile forever, Jared. Get to the good stuff. 137 00:04:56,586 --> 00:04:59,336 One of our coders has been sending info 138 00:04:59,336 --> 00:05:00,878 straight to Hooli High Command. 139 00:05:03,753 --> 00:05:05,003 Richard: Wow. 140 00:05:05,003 --> 00:05:07,545 How the fuck did the mole get all this information? 141 00:05:07,545 --> 00:05:11,420 By exploiting our most glaring weakness. 142 00:05:11,420 --> 00:05:13,545 ♪ You were working as a waitress ♪ 143 00:05:13,545 --> 00:05:15,712 ♪ In a cocktail bar ♪ 144 00:05:15,712 --> 00:05:19,253 ♪ When I met Jeff ♪ 145 00:05:29,795 --> 00:05:32,044 No, no, no. You guys have it all wrong. 146 00:05:32,044 --> 00:05:34,086 Okay? There's no way Jeff is the mole. 147 00:05:34,086 --> 00:05:35,712 Okay? It's not Jeff. 148 00:05:35,712 --> 00:05:37,420 Right, Jeff? 149 00:05:38,503 --> 00:05:40,128 Jeff? 150 00:05:41,169 --> 00:05:43,003 What about Dave and Buster's, Jeff? 151 00:05:44,294 --> 00:05:46,169 What about that time I got a bullseye in Skee-Ball 152 00:05:46,169 --> 00:05:47,336 and yelled out, "Bazinga!" 153 00:05:47,336 --> 00:05:48,962 And you said, "Okay." 154 00:05:48,962 --> 00:05:51,003 You can't fake enthusiasm like that. 155 00:05:52,294 --> 00:05:53,628 Well, I did. 156 00:05:53,628 --> 00:05:55,336 Jared: You Judas. 157 00:05:55,336 --> 00:05:57,336 You cow-handed poltroon! 158 00:05:57,336 --> 00:05:59,128 We-- We thought you were a Stallion! 159 00:05:59,128 --> 00:06:00,962 You're no Stallion. 160 00:06:00,962 --> 00:06:02,628 What is it with you guys and stallions? 161 00:06:02,628 --> 00:06:04,795 What's with you being a rat fuck? 162 00:06:04,795 --> 00:06:07,962 You signed a very aggressive Non-Disclosure Agreement... 163 00:06:07,962 --> 00:06:09,795 which you are in breach of. 164 00:06:09,795 --> 00:06:12,795 Which means, we can fire you, obviously, 165 00:06:12,795 --> 00:06:16,128 and then have you arrested, and thrown in jail. 166 00:06:16,128 --> 00:06:19,545 But Gavin would then know we are on to you, 167 00:06:19,545 --> 00:06:22,044 so here's the deal. 168 00:06:22,044 --> 00:06:24,044 You're gonna come into the office every day, 169 00:06:24,044 --> 00:06:25,920 and sit down at your fucking workstation, 170 00:06:25,920 --> 00:06:27,670 and pretend like nothing's wrong. 171 00:06:27,670 --> 00:06:28,878 Fine. 172 00:06:30,003 --> 00:06:31,670 Uh, that was mine. 173 00:06:33,795 --> 00:06:35,128 Bummer. 174 00:06:35,128 --> 00:06:38,169 "The irony is, the Internet, which we all use 175 00:06:38,169 --> 00:06:40,003 "to search for billions of things, 176 00:06:40,003 --> 00:06:44,128 "has itself long been searching for something. 177 00:06:45,253 --> 00:06:47,086 And here it is." 178 00:06:47,086 --> 00:06:48,962 Okay, then I turn and gesture. 179 00:06:52,795 --> 00:06:55,003 "The Box Three. 180 00:06:55,003 --> 00:06:57,044 Signature Edition." 181 00:06:58,753 --> 00:07:00,545 Then I come back to the podium. 182 00:07:01,837 --> 00:07:03,461 "I put my name on this, 183 00:07:03,461 --> 00:07:05,962 "because I personally stand behind 184 00:07:05,962 --> 00:07:10,962 "the new SAS-slash SSD-slash-NVMe drive bays, 185 00:07:10,962 --> 00:07:13,169 "the 24-core processors. 186 00:07:13,169 --> 00:07:18,712 "I stand behind the ECC DDR4 SD-RAM LR-DIMMs 187 00:07:18,712 --> 00:07:22,044 "and their exceptional reliability. 188 00:07:22,044 --> 00:07:24,044 Will you stand with me?" 189 00:07:35,712 --> 00:07:37,628 About the spotlight, should it be wider? 190 00:07:37,628 --> 00:07:39,211 I had the same thought. As did I. 191 00:07:39,211 --> 00:07:41,044 I can speak with the technical team. Please. 192 00:07:42,086 --> 00:07:43,878 Any word from our mole at Pied Piper? 193 00:07:43,878 --> 00:07:45,712 I'm confident that if there were anything to report, 194 00:07:45,712 --> 00:07:47,211 we'd have heard about it by now, sir. 195 00:07:47,211 --> 00:07:48,628 Alright! 196 00:07:48,628 --> 00:07:51,169 I'm off to Jackson Hole for a couple of days to clear my mind, 197 00:07:51,169 --> 00:07:52,461 and center myself. 198 00:07:52,461 --> 00:07:54,962 I'll be off the grid. Not to be disturbed for any reason. 199 00:07:54,962 --> 00:07:56,420 Understood? Scott: Absolutely. 200 00:07:56,420 --> 00:07:59,128 Is there anything else you'd like us to take care of? Oh. 201 00:07:59,128 --> 00:08:00,878 The bear is sticky with honey. 202 00:08:00,878 --> 00:08:02,086 See ya soon. 203 00:08:07,628 --> 00:08:11,294 "The bear is sticky with honey." 204 00:08:11,294 --> 00:08:13,044 What does he mean by that? 205 00:08:13,044 --> 00:08:15,086 I don't know. 206 00:08:15,086 --> 00:08:17,086 Hello, Stallions. 207 00:08:17,086 --> 00:08:20,503 You continue to be the best of the best. 208 00:08:20,503 --> 00:08:22,753 I commend you. 209 00:08:22,753 --> 00:08:23,920 And then there's you. 210 00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:25,128 The anti-Stallion. 211 00:08:25,128 --> 00:08:27,461 Move your hand off your fucking mouse, now. 212 00:08:31,795 --> 00:08:35,128 And I was going to take you to see BattleBots live with me, 213 00:08:35,128 --> 00:08:37,461 but no longer... "friend." 214 00:08:37,461 --> 00:08:39,670 Now who looks stupid? 215 00:08:39,670 --> 00:08:40,837 ♪ ♪ 216 00:08:40,837 --> 00:08:42,461 Yeah, so, um... 217 00:08:42,461 --> 00:08:45,920 our new developers just agreed to our terms, 218 00:08:45,920 --> 00:08:48,169 Richard : and are now officially on board. 219 00:08:48,169 --> 00:08:51,420 Richard is a master at getting consent. 220 00:08:51,420 --> 00:08:53,461 That's great news, guys. 221 00:08:53,461 --> 00:08:54,795 Eight new partners. 222 00:08:54,795 --> 00:08:58,003 Yeah! Actually, we're calling them the OctoPipers. 223 00:09:01,795 --> 00:09:03,670 Uh, until a better name comes along. 224 00:09:03,670 --> 00:09:05,795 Just wanted to give that one its day in court. 225 00:09:05,795 --> 00:09:08,253 Well, we have some more good news for you, Richard. 226 00:09:08,253 --> 00:09:09,253 You remember last year, 227 00:09:09,253 --> 00:09:11,169 Laurie and I funded K 228 00:09:11,169 --> 00:09:13,503 Largest independent gaming company in the Valley? 229 00:09:13,503 --> 00:09:15,503 Uh, yeah, of course! 230 00:09:15,503 --> 00:09:18,169 Um, actually, now that you-- you bring them up, 231 00:09:18,169 --> 00:09:19,962 I-I didn't want to be too forward, 232 00:09:19,962 --> 00:09:21,837 but I was hoping that one day, 233 00:09:21,837 --> 00:09:24,670 we could talk to them about joining our 'net. 234 00:09:24,670 --> 00:09:26,962 Well, what if I told you that day is today? 235 00:09:26,962 --> 00:09:27,962 What? 236 00:09:27,962 --> 00:09:30,336 In addition to being business associates, 237 00:09:30,336 --> 00:09:32,795 the CEO and I take medically prescribed 238 00:09:32,795 --> 00:09:34,670 and supervised MDMA together. 239 00:09:34,670 --> 00:09:37,211 I'm taking it for severe post-partum depression. 240 00:09:37,211 --> 00:09:39,670 I do not know why he is taking it. 241 00:09:39,670 --> 00:09:41,878 Regardless, when I saw him yesterday, 242 00:09:41,878 --> 00:09:45,670 he was quite euphoric about speaking to you regarding a deal. 243 00:09:45,670 --> 00:09:47,336 K The creators of the game 244 00:09:47,336 --> 00:09:49,878 "Undead Sex Offender"? They're-- they're huge. 245 00:09:49,878 --> 00:09:53,545 Yeah! Yeah, partnering with a company of that size this early 246 00:09:53,545 --> 00:09:55,044 would put us months ahead. 247 00:09:55,044 --> 00:09:57,253 This is not a done deal. 248 00:09:57,253 --> 00:10:00,253 K-Hole is protective of its brand. 249 00:10:00,253 --> 00:10:01,712 They will want to speak to you 250 00:10:01,712 --> 00:10:03,461 regarding who else you are dealing with. 251 00:10:03,461 --> 00:10:05,878 Okay, right, well, um... 252 00:10:05,878 --> 00:10:07,420 why don't I just bring the OctoPipers? 253 00:10:07,420 --> 00:10:10,503 New name to come, though it's pretty popular around here. 254 00:10:10,503 --> 00:10:13,962 Uh, they can talk to K-Hole. 255 00:10:13,962 --> 00:10:16,003 Tell them why they joined. 256 00:10:16,003 --> 00:10:19,044 Allowing you to speak less? 257 00:10:19,044 --> 00:10:20,753 Good strategy. Alright. 258 00:10:20,753 --> 00:10:22,920 K-Hole will be expecting you this afternoon. 259 00:10:24,169 --> 00:10:25,503 Knock 'em dead, Richard. 260 00:10:27,294 --> 00:10:29,920 Whatever you are doing, stop it now. 261 00:10:31,420 --> 00:10:34,586 Um, yeah. We're just... high-fiving. 262 00:10:34,586 --> 00:10:35,753 Bye. 263 00:10:35,753 --> 00:10:37,253 K-Hole. I can't believe it! 264 00:10:37,253 --> 00:10:39,294 I'm bursting. I'm bursting! 265 00:10:39,294 --> 00:10:41,336 Um, here, I printed driving directions. 266 00:10:41,336 --> 00:10:43,086 Oh, it's okay, I got my phone. 267 00:10:43,086 --> 00:10:45,253 Well, I have marked available bathrooms along the route. 268 00:10:50,003 --> 00:10:51,670 Okay, here we go. 269 00:10:51,670 --> 00:10:54,670 Richard, you never return my calls. 270 00:10:54,670 --> 00:10:57,253 You mean the hundreds of voicemails you've left 271 00:10:57,253 --> 00:11:00,795 where you just called me a terrible CEO with no dick? 272 00:11:00,795 --> 00:11:02,878 Yes! You're talking to other companies. 273 00:11:02,878 --> 00:11:05,378 That is not public information. 274 00:11:05,378 --> 00:11:07,503 Jian-Yang: I'm a part owner in Pied Piper. 275 00:11:07,503 --> 00:11:10,420 You need to make a deal with my companies. 276 00:11:10,420 --> 00:11:12,962 You mean your incubator's spurious knock-offs 277 00:11:12,962 --> 00:11:15,169 of legitimate American businesses? 278 00:11:15,169 --> 00:11:18,461 "New Expedia," "New Snapchat," "New Zillow"? 279 00:11:18,461 --> 00:11:20,878 But they're for Chinese market. 280 00:11:20,878 --> 00:11:23,128 It's a very sophisticated strategy. 281 00:11:23,128 --> 00:11:25,294 Okay, look, taking existing companies 282 00:11:25,294 --> 00:11:28,670 and just calling them "new" isn't sophisticated. That's theft. 283 00:11:28,670 --> 00:11:30,503 You make a new Internet. 284 00:11:32,420 --> 00:11:33,753 That is different. 285 00:11:33,753 --> 00:11:35,420 I-- Look, we're not gonna make any deals 286 00:11:35,420 --> 00:11:37,336 with any of your companies, okay? 287 00:11:40,962 --> 00:11:42,336 Don't pick up. 288 00:11:45,128 --> 00:11:47,586 Richard, hello. 289 00:11:47,586 --> 00:11:48,795 It's Jian-Yang. 290 00:11:48,795 --> 00:11:51,920 You are a shitty CEO. 291 00:11:54,003 --> 00:11:57,753 As long as I own 10% of Pied Piper, 292 00:11:57,753 --> 00:11:59,378 I will make chaos. 293 00:11:59,378 --> 00:12:01,336 Okay. 294 00:12:02,628 --> 00:12:04,086 I thought you hated that car. 295 00:12:04,086 --> 00:12:06,628 Aviato car smells like a dead pig. 296 00:12:06,628 --> 00:12:10,003 You're aware that Russ Hanneman urinated in that car, no? 297 00:12:11,294 --> 00:12:12,336 This car? 298 00:12:12,336 --> 00:12:13,336 Mm-hmm. 299 00:12:16,712 --> 00:12:17,712 Uh... 300 00:12:17,712 --> 00:12:19,878 are you just gonna leave it here? Yes. 301 00:12:19,878 --> 00:12:21,169 Well... 302 00:12:22,211 --> 00:12:23,378 looks like I have a reason to find 303 00:12:23,378 --> 00:12:25,420 Pied Piper's official towing company. 304 00:12:25,420 --> 00:12:26,670 I'm gonna get some bids. 305 00:12:26,670 --> 00:12:28,044 Yeah, while you're at it, 306 00:12:28,044 --> 00:12:30,420 see if you can find someone to bash that guy's face in. 307 00:12:30,420 --> 00:12:33,545 Uh, I-I can do some research. 308 00:12:39,211 --> 00:12:41,753 Maybe turn your phone off during the meeting. 309 00:12:41,753 --> 00:12:43,586 You're a shitty CEO! 310 00:12:49,670 --> 00:12:51,712 Richard: Thanks again, Colin, for having us. 311 00:12:51,712 --> 00:12:53,461 Uh, the fact that a company like yours 312 00:12:53,461 --> 00:12:56,086 with such a pristine reputation it sitting down with us 313 00:12:56,086 --> 00:12:57,878 is, honestly, incredibly flattering. 314 00:12:57,878 --> 00:12:59,044 It's cool. 315 00:12:59,044 --> 00:13:00,503 Ooh, wow. 316 00:13:00,503 --> 00:13:02,962 That'll be a closed casket. Yeah. 317 00:13:02,962 --> 00:13:04,461 Alright, well, we thought the best way 318 00:13:04,461 --> 00:13:05,420 to introduce the Pipernet 319 00:13:05,420 --> 00:13:07,586 would be through the eight developers 320 00:13:07,586 --> 00:13:08,628 that have already signed on. 321 00:13:08,628 --> 00:13:10,878 Who we are calling the OctoPipers. 322 00:13:11,878 --> 00:13:13,086 That's dumb. 323 00:13:13,086 --> 00:13:16,169 Um, anyway, let's introduce you to the group. 324 00:13:16,169 --> 00:13:18,962 Um, we've got a great analytics tool 325 00:13:18,962 --> 00:13:20,753 by a former Google guru. 326 00:13:20,753 --> 00:13:22,586 Wish I'd have thought of that one. Cool. 327 00:13:22,586 --> 00:13:25,336 Uh, music streaming with an AI taste predictor 328 00:13:25,336 --> 00:13:27,003 that is off the charts. 329 00:13:27,003 --> 00:13:28,003 Good space. 330 00:13:28,003 --> 00:13:30,503 Yes, and this handsome devil over here, 331 00:13:30,503 --> 00:13:33,128 is creating a very promising gay dating site. 332 00:13:33,128 --> 00:13:36,169 That's cool. Yeah, but don't worry, he's not snobby about it. 333 00:13:36,169 --> 00:13:37,461 He's actually pretty boring. 334 00:13:37,461 --> 00:13:39,336 I don't mean that as an insult. Those are his words. 335 00:13:39,336 --> 00:13:41,545 Long-term relationship. Doesn't smoke, doesn't drink. 336 00:13:41,545 --> 00:13:44,086 And him and his man go to church every Sunday. 337 00:13:44,086 --> 00:13:45,878 So... 338 00:13:45,878 --> 00:13:48,211 loves Bible studies, right? 339 00:13:48,211 --> 00:13:50,586 Just a straight-up boring, ordinary guy, 340 00:13:50,586 --> 00:13:51,753 but obviously not straight. 341 00:13:51,753 --> 00:13:55,211 Very gay, and also a Christian, right? 342 00:13:56,586 --> 00:13:58,461 Richard: Okay, so, that went well. 343 00:13:58,461 --> 00:14:01,712 It started out a little weird, but things really picked up-- Why did you do that? 344 00:14:01,712 --> 00:14:03,753 Why did you say that? Say what? 345 00:14:03,753 --> 00:14:05,753 Richard, you just told a room full of tech people 346 00:14:05,753 --> 00:14:07,086 that I'm a Christian. 347 00:14:07,086 --> 00:14:08,420 Oh. 348 00:14:08,420 --> 00:14:10,461 Okay, but-- but you are, aren't you? 349 00:14:10,461 --> 00:14:12,795 Yes, but I told you that in confidence. 350 00:14:12,795 --> 00:14:14,586 I said "between you and me." 351 00:14:14,586 --> 00:14:17,253 I'm not openly Christian. 352 00:14:17,253 --> 00:14:18,753 Thanks a lot, man. 353 00:14:18,753 --> 00:14:19,795 You just outed me. 354 00:14:19,795 --> 00:14:22,253 Oh, I'm sorry, Deedee. I didn't-- 355 00:14:22,253 --> 00:14:25,253 Okay, um, should we hug? 356 00:14:25,253 --> 00:14:27,128 I can not make it weird this time. 357 00:14:30,420 --> 00:14:31,837 I'm-- I'm sorry, Richard. 358 00:14:31,837 --> 00:14:33,670 You know that my default position 359 00:14:33,670 --> 00:14:36,753 is blind support of whatever you do, but... 360 00:14:36,753 --> 00:14:38,128 this was not your best moment. 361 00:14:38,128 --> 00:14:40,253 Guys, it can't be that big of a deal, right? 362 00:14:40,253 --> 00:14:41,503 Why should it be? 363 00:14:41,503 --> 00:14:43,294 America loves Christians. 364 00:14:43,294 --> 00:14:44,378 Muslims are the enemy. 365 00:14:44,378 --> 00:14:46,128 Well, that's true in most of America, 366 00:14:46,128 --> 00:14:48,712 but not in Silicon Valley, sadly. 367 00:14:48,712 --> 00:14:51,545 "Sadly"? You can be openly polyamorous. 368 00:14:51,545 --> 00:14:53,670 And people here will call you brave. 369 00:14:53,670 --> 00:14:56,962 You can put micro-doses of LSD in your cereal, 370 00:14:56,962 --> 00:14:58,670 and-- and people will call you a pioneer. 371 00:14:58,670 --> 00:15:02,294 But the one thing you cannot be is a Christian. 372 00:15:02,294 --> 00:15:04,336 I find their theology to be illegitimate, 373 00:15:04,336 --> 00:15:06,586 and it's clear that they are the source 374 00:15:06,586 --> 00:15:08,628 of the majority of the world's problems. 375 00:15:08,628 --> 00:15:11,044 But, fuck, Richard, even I wouldn't just... 376 00:15:11,044 --> 00:15:12,670 out a Christian like that. 377 00:15:12,670 --> 00:15:14,461 Yeah, it was kinda fucked up. 378 00:15:14,461 --> 00:15:17,545 Cool man, thanks. 379 00:15:17,545 --> 00:15:20,211 Hey, I thought he wasn't supposed to chime in. 380 00:15:20,211 --> 00:15:21,878 Yeah, he's not, but... 381 00:15:23,211 --> 00:15:25,044 based on its merits, I'll allow that one. 382 00:15:25,044 --> 00:15:27,420 Guys, come on. 383 00:15:27,420 --> 00:15:28,878 It can't be that bad. 384 00:15:28,878 --> 00:15:30,169 Richard! 385 00:15:30,169 --> 00:15:32,420 What the fuck did you do over there? 386 00:15:32,420 --> 00:15:35,712 So I just got off the phone with Colin over at K-Hole, 387 00:15:35,712 --> 00:15:37,253 and while he loves your tech, 388 00:15:37,253 --> 00:15:39,044 he's considering blowing up the deal. 389 00:15:39,044 --> 00:15:40,044 What? 390 00:15:40,044 --> 00:15:42,044 Just because one of my CEOs is Christian? 391 00:15:42,044 --> 00:15:43,878 It freaks people out in the Valley! 392 00:15:43,878 --> 00:15:46,211 Okay, so what do you want me to do, Monica? 393 00:15:46,211 --> 00:15:48,962 You want me to drop Deedee just because he's Christian? 394 00:15:48,962 --> 00:15:51,670 The company's not Christian. It's gay... 395 00:15:51,670 --> 00:15:52,878 which is fine, right? 396 00:15:52,878 --> 00:15:54,753 Yeah! No, that-- that plays great. 397 00:15:54,753 --> 00:15:57,712 Look, cutting all ties to Deedee and FirstSight 398 00:15:57,712 --> 00:16:00,253 will definitely send a strong message to Colin. 399 00:16:00,253 --> 00:16:01,586 And it might be the only way. 400 00:16:01,586 --> 00:16:04,086 Like killing somebody to prove you're not a narc, 401 00:16:04,086 --> 00:16:06,086 or showing a john your genitals 402 00:16:06,086 --> 00:16:07,962 to prove you're a legitimate male prostitute 403 00:16:07,962 --> 00:16:09,128 and not an undercover cop. 404 00:16:09,128 --> 00:16:11,878 What? Because cops aren't allowed to do that. 405 00:16:11,878 --> 00:16:13,294 And worst case scenario, 406 00:16:13,294 --> 00:16:15,128 the john walks off with a free peek. 407 00:16:15,128 --> 00:16:17,586 Oh, that's the towing company. Excuse me. 408 00:16:18,753 --> 00:16:20,336 Forget it. 409 00:16:20,336 --> 00:16:21,878 Monica, I'm not doing it. 410 00:16:21,878 --> 00:16:24,086 I mean, I'm not dropping him. 411 00:16:24,086 --> 00:16:25,920 Alright. Fine. 412 00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:27,837 Fine. I-I will call Colin, 413 00:16:27,837 --> 00:16:29,628 and try and smooth things over for you, 414 00:16:29,628 --> 00:16:31,336 but you need to handle Deedee. 415 00:16:31,336 --> 00:16:33,712 Okay, apologize for outing him, of course, 416 00:16:33,712 --> 00:16:36,545 but you need to make sure he keeps quiet about this. 417 00:16:36,545 --> 00:16:38,586 Alright, 'cause it's not just about losing K-Hole, 418 00:16:38,586 --> 00:16:39,962 it's way worse than that. 419 00:16:39,962 --> 00:16:41,211 Let's put it this way. 420 00:16:41,211 --> 00:16:43,211 Would you want to go from being a rock band 421 00:16:43,211 --> 00:16:46,795 to being... a Christian rock band? 422 00:16:47,962 --> 00:16:49,336 Oh, shit. 423 00:16:49,336 --> 00:16:52,378 "The bear is sticky with honey." 424 00:16:52,378 --> 00:16:54,545 Those were his exact words. 425 00:16:54,545 --> 00:16:55,753 But what does that mean? 426 00:16:55,753 --> 00:16:57,461 Well, Gavin speaks in parables. 427 00:16:57,461 --> 00:17:00,128 I think what Gavin is saying is... 428 00:17:00,128 --> 00:17:01,670 "consider the bear." 429 00:17:01,670 --> 00:17:04,336 And all this pizazz is like the honey. 430 00:17:04,336 --> 00:17:06,378 And it's become too sticky. 431 00:17:06,378 --> 00:17:07,795 There's too much of it. It's all over him. 432 00:17:07,795 --> 00:17:10,712 Incorrect. No, see, the whole launch is the bear, 433 00:17:10,712 --> 00:17:12,461 and the honey is the pizazz. 434 00:17:12,461 --> 00:17:14,211 The bear needs more pizazz. 435 00:17:14,211 --> 00:17:16,878 The bear is ravenous for pizazz. 436 00:17:16,878 --> 00:17:18,211 You don't speak for Gavin. 437 00:17:18,211 --> 00:17:20,753 I don't need to. This is the word of Gavin. 438 00:17:20,753 --> 00:17:22,545 Alright, forget it. 439 00:17:22,545 --> 00:17:24,253 You do it your way, I'll do it mine. Okay, fine. 440 00:17:24,253 --> 00:17:27,128 Gonna show you. Make it clear for all of you. Okay, follow me. 441 00:17:27,128 --> 00:17:29,670 Jared: Well, congratulations on becoming 442 00:17:29,670 --> 00:17:31,837 Pied Piper's official towing company. 443 00:17:31,837 --> 00:17:33,503 Uh-huh, yeah, great. 444 00:17:33,503 --> 00:17:34,628 So should I bill this to you, 445 00:17:34,628 --> 00:17:37,044 or is Mr. Bighetti gonna take care of it? 446 00:17:37,044 --> 00:17:39,878 "Bighetti"? It's registered under his name. 447 00:17:39,878 --> 00:17:41,211 I'm sorry. Can I...? 448 00:17:43,336 --> 00:17:47,003 ♪ ♪ 449 00:17:47,003 --> 00:17:49,003 Richard: Anyway, it was a mistake. 450 00:17:49,003 --> 00:17:50,336 I'm sorry I outed you. 451 00:17:50,336 --> 00:17:51,962 I just wish we could go back to normal. 452 00:17:51,962 --> 00:17:54,336 You know, just like, how things were. 453 00:17:54,336 --> 00:17:55,753 A CEO and a gay CEO. 454 00:17:55,753 --> 00:17:57,670 I don't even know what normal is anymore, Richard. 455 00:17:57,670 --> 00:17:59,795 It's been such a crazy 24 hours, you know? 456 00:17:59,795 --> 00:18:02,420 Gossip travels so fast in the Valley. 457 00:18:02,420 --> 00:18:04,503 I'll be lucky if my parents ever talk to me again. 458 00:18:04,503 --> 00:18:06,044 Your parents aren't Christian? 459 00:18:06,044 --> 00:18:07,294 I'm from Palo Alto. 460 00:18:07,294 --> 00:18:10,294 You know, my dad says my lifestyle makes him sick. 461 00:18:10,294 --> 00:18:11,795 He just wants his gay son back. 462 00:18:11,795 --> 00:18:13,920 And he's okay with the gay part? 463 00:18:13,920 --> 00:18:15,545 He's gay. Oh. 464 00:18:15,545 --> 00:18:16,878 But the crazy part is, 465 00:18:16,878 --> 00:18:19,670 when I finally got home and I got in bed, 466 00:18:19,670 --> 00:18:22,128 I had the soundest sleep I've had in years. 467 00:18:22,128 --> 00:18:25,044 Exhaustion. No! Relief, Richard. 468 00:18:25,044 --> 00:18:26,545 I'm out, okay? 469 00:18:26,545 --> 00:18:27,753 My nightmare's over. 470 00:18:27,753 --> 00:18:29,586 I don't ever have to go back in the closet again, 471 00:18:29,586 --> 00:18:32,211 and I've got you to thank for it. 472 00:18:34,211 --> 00:18:35,211 Check it out. 473 00:18:36,628 --> 00:18:38,545 Oh, oh, oh. 474 00:18:38,545 --> 00:18:39,795 You like it? 475 00:18:39,795 --> 00:18:42,962 It's good. I guess... maybe it's just a little busy? 476 00:18:42,962 --> 00:18:45,003 Like, um, there's one word too many. 477 00:18:45,003 --> 00:18:47,378 One word? Well, I like the gay part. 478 00:18:47,378 --> 00:18:48,878 If anything, it could be more gay. 479 00:18:48,878 --> 00:18:50,586 You should gay it up, 480 00:18:50,586 --> 00:18:53,003 and then, I like the "proud" part. 481 00:18:53,003 --> 00:18:54,211 It's just the... 482 00:18:54,211 --> 00:18:56,044 Christian part. 483 00:18:56,044 --> 00:18:58,461 Look, Richard, this is great, 484 00:18:58,461 --> 00:19:01,545 because now I can be gay and a Christian. 485 00:19:01,545 --> 00:19:03,336 Or just be gay! 486 00:19:03,336 --> 00:19:05,253 You know, you could be a-- a twink. 487 00:19:05,253 --> 00:19:06,420 A bear, an otter. 488 00:19:06,420 --> 00:19:08,461 A circuit queen, a chub, a pup. 489 00:19:08,461 --> 00:19:10,086 A gipster, a daddy chaser, 490 00:19:10,086 --> 00:19:11,545 a leatherman, a lady boy. 491 00:19:11,545 --> 00:19:12,795 You could be a Donald Duck, 492 00:19:12,795 --> 00:19:14,837 which is a gay guy who got kicked out of the Navy. 493 00:19:14,837 --> 00:19:16,044 Yeah, I-- I know what it is. 494 00:19:16,044 --> 00:19:17,378 How do you know so many gay things? 495 00:19:17,378 --> 00:19:19,753 I worked with a guy. 496 00:19:21,253 --> 00:19:22,795 Just... 497 00:19:22,795 --> 00:19:24,086 don't be a Christian. 498 00:19:24,086 --> 00:19:26,086 Wow. 499 00:19:26,086 --> 00:19:27,253 After all you put me through, 500 00:19:27,253 --> 00:19:28,962 it turns out, you're biased too. 501 00:19:28,962 --> 00:19:30,628 No! No, no, no! I'm not! 502 00:19:30,628 --> 00:19:33,128 I swear to you I'm not. I'm chill AF. 503 00:19:33,128 --> 00:19:34,336 It's just everybody else. 504 00:19:34,336 --> 00:19:37,628 Look, if you go Christian, I lose K-Hole games. 505 00:19:37,628 --> 00:19:40,003 I cannot let that happen. I know it sucks. 506 00:19:40,003 --> 00:19:41,753 It's shitty, but it's the truth. 507 00:19:41,753 --> 00:19:44,169 I'm gonna make things easy for you, Richard. 508 00:19:44,169 --> 00:19:45,294 I'm out. 509 00:19:46,670 --> 00:19:48,545 Of the closet? No! 510 00:19:48,545 --> 00:19:50,420 The new Internet! 511 00:19:50,420 --> 00:19:52,128 The Internet you said was gonna be 512 00:19:52,128 --> 00:19:54,670 "The first truly free and open Internet." 513 00:19:54,670 --> 00:19:55,962 Open for everyone. 514 00:19:55,962 --> 00:19:57,336 Whatever happened to that, huh? 515 00:19:57,336 --> 00:19:58,795 ♪ ♪ 516 00:19:58,795 --> 00:20:00,378 Nice place. 517 00:20:00,378 --> 00:20:01,795 Oh, thanks, yeah. 518 00:20:01,795 --> 00:20:04,128 Oh, wow! That's a nice touch. 519 00:20:04,128 --> 00:20:05,378 Big Head: Yeah, thanks! 520 00:20:05,378 --> 00:20:07,962 The Monterey Bay Aquarium was testing their sonar, 521 00:20:07,962 --> 00:20:11,628 and found this thing, like, two miles under the ocean. 522 00:20:11,628 --> 00:20:13,336 And I figure, Erlich and I already bought it, 523 00:20:13,336 --> 00:20:14,878 so I might as well hold onto it. 524 00:20:14,878 --> 00:20:16,795 Plus, it weighs like 8,000 pounds, 525 00:20:16,795 --> 00:20:18,503 so I couldn't move it if I wanted to. 526 00:20:18,503 --> 00:20:20,837 Well, and it also kinda works as your mascot. 527 00:20:20,837 --> 00:20:22,336 Right 528 00:20:22,336 --> 00:20:24,044 Oh, yeah, 'cause "Nelson." 529 00:20:25,169 --> 00:20:27,712 Oh, I meant because it's a big head. 530 00:20:27,712 --> 00:20:29,837 I guess that works, too. 531 00:20:30,795 --> 00:20:32,128 So, what's up, man? 532 00:20:32,128 --> 00:20:34,420 Um, well, I wanted to ask you-- 533 00:20:34,420 --> 00:20:36,420 Oh! Big Head! 534 00:20:36,420 --> 00:20:38,461 Now I get it. 535 00:20:38,461 --> 00:20:40,336 Sorry. Is-- is it possible 536 00:20:40,336 --> 00:20:43,003 that the general partnership that you formed with Erlich 537 00:20:43,003 --> 00:20:44,294 is still in effect? 538 00:20:44,294 --> 00:20:46,169 Oh. No way. 539 00:20:46,169 --> 00:20:48,003 You definitely dissolved it? 540 00:20:48,003 --> 00:20:49,420 Yeah, my dad insisted. 541 00:20:49,420 --> 00:20:52,336 I remember he filled out this whole form for me, 542 00:20:52,336 --> 00:20:53,461 and made me sign it, 543 00:20:53,461 --> 00:20:54,920 mail it in and everything. 544 00:20:54,920 --> 00:20:58,003 Yeah, 'cause I-- I remember I had the paperwork in one hand, 545 00:20:58,003 --> 00:21:00,336 and the menu for Mr. Chow's in the other. 546 00:21:00,336 --> 00:21:01,378 And then-- 547 00:21:08,044 --> 00:21:09,420 ♪ ♪ 548 00:21:13,753 --> 00:21:15,128 Oh, no way! 549 00:21:15,128 --> 00:21:16,753 Still have the paperwork. 550 00:21:16,753 --> 00:21:18,878 Guess I must have sent the menu. 551 00:21:18,878 --> 00:21:21,128 Big Head, this is great news. 552 00:21:21,128 --> 00:21:22,294 Scott: Gavin? 553 00:21:22,294 --> 00:21:23,962 I think you're really going to love the changes 554 00:21:23,962 --> 00:21:25,420 that my team has made to the presentation. 555 00:21:25,420 --> 00:21:28,169 I think you might like ours even better. 556 00:21:28,169 --> 00:21:29,712 Sorry, what changes? 557 00:21:29,712 --> 00:21:30,962 We are presenting two paths, 558 00:21:30,962 --> 00:21:33,211 and you alone will decide which one we walk, Gavin. 559 00:21:33,211 --> 00:21:34,712 What the fuck are you talking about? 560 00:21:34,712 --> 00:21:36,545 I thought the presentation was fine as it is. 561 00:21:36,545 --> 00:21:38,878 Wait. What? You did? 562 00:21:38,878 --> 00:21:40,837 Goddammit! 563 00:21:40,837 --> 00:21:42,128 Why is this still here? 564 00:21:42,128 --> 00:21:43,962 I said it was too sticky. 565 00:21:43,962 --> 00:21:46,128 Don't you listen to anything I say? 566 00:21:47,211 --> 00:21:49,211 The bear... Sticky with honey. 567 00:21:49,211 --> 00:21:51,003 So what did you change? 568 00:21:51,003 --> 00:21:52,586 Uh, the spotlight. 569 00:21:52,586 --> 00:21:54,962 Yes! We're making it wider just like you asked. 570 00:21:54,962 --> 00:21:56,378 Good. 571 00:21:56,378 --> 00:21:58,545 You know what? Let's show you to your dressing room. Yeah. 572 00:21:58,545 --> 00:22:00,253 And whenever you're ready, you let us know, 573 00:22:00,253 --> 00:22:01,420 we'll show you that spotlight, huh? 574 00:22:01,420 --> 00:22:03,712 You're gonna love it. Sarah: We did it! 575 00:22:03,712 --> 00:22:06,044 We had to fly him in from Tucson, but we got the bear. 576 00:22:10,461 --> 00:22:12,503 Gavin hates the bear. You failed! 577 00:22:12,503 --> 00:22:14,294 Put everything back the way it was. 578 00:22:14,294 --> 00:22:16,420 And widen the spotlight! 579 00:22:16,420 --> 00:22:18,253 Guess what, asshole. 580 00:22:18,253 --> 00:22:19,920 Leon told me he wanted your ticket, 581 00:22:19,920 --> 00:22:22,962 'cause he wants to go see BattleBots with me. 582 00:22:24,253 --> 00:22:26,545 But then he remembered he actually had plans that night 583 00:22:26,545 --> 00:22:28,878 with a bunch of people, doesn't know what they're doing, 584 00:22:28,878 --> 00:22:29,920 their plans are sort of fluid, 585 00:22:29,920 --> 00:22:31,962 plus, it's like friends from his old work, 586 00:22:31,962 --> 00:22:33,753 so it'd be weird if I hung out with them. 587 00:22:34,795 --> 00:22:36,294 Anyway... 588 00:22:36,294 --> 00:22:39,586 looks like you and I are going to see BattleBots. 589 00:22:39,586 --> 00:22:41,003 You're going to hang out with me, 590 00:22:41,003 --> 00:22:42,795 and have fun, whether you like it or not. 591 00:22:42,795 --> 00:22:45,795 And what goes best with BattleBots? 592 00:22:45,795 --> 00:22:48,044 That's right. Chicken wings. 593 00:22:48,044 --> 00:22:52,003 That's why you get a sweet $50 gift card to Dave and Buster's. 594 00:22:52,003 --> 00:22:54,920 Serves you right for fucking us over. 595 00:22:54,920 --> 00:22:56,294 Wash your fucking hair. 596 00:22:58,003 --> 00:23:01,169 And you know what happens when I get drunk, Jeff? 597 00:23:01,169 --> 00:23:03,336 I get so sincere. 598 00:23:03,336 --> 00:23:04,920 It's really awkward. 599 00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:06,545 Fuck you, Jeff. 600 00:23:06,545 --> 00:23:08,169 Oh, um, can you drive? 601 00:23:08,169 --> 00:23:09,920 ♪ ♪ 602 00:23:09,920 --> 00:23:12,503 Well, I spoke to La Flamme, 603 00:23:12,503 --> 00:23:13,712 and it's official. 604 00:23:13,712 --> 00:23:16,461 Big Head is still legally Erlich's next of kin. 605 00:23:16,461 --> 00:23:19,461 So Jian-Yang's whole gambit was for naught. 606 00:23:19,461 --> 00:23:20,670 Wow, really? 607 00:23:20,670 --> 00:23:23,378 Big Head owns Erlich's house, and 10% of Pied Piper. 608 00:23:23,378 --> 00:23:26,086 I called the sheriff and started eviction proceedings. 609 00:23:26,086 --> 00:23:27,545 We're gonna get everything back. 610 00:23:27,545 --> 00:23:31,753 Oh, also, the, uh, OctoPipers are arriving for the meeting. 611 00:23:31,753 --> 00:23:34,044 It's a good thing that FirstSight dropped out, right? 612 00:23:34,044 --> 00:23:35,795 'Cause we're back down to eight developers, 613 00:23:35,795 --> 00:23:37,294 so you can keep that name. 614 00:23:37,294 --> 00:23:39,670 Actually, uh, no, we can't. 615 00:23:41,211 --> 00:23:42,753 Wait, what? 616 00:23:42,753 --> 00:23:44,962 I'm glad this worked out. Yeah. 617 00:23:44,962 --> 00:23:46,211 Thanks for dropping FirstSight. 618 00:23:46,211 --> 00:23:48,461 Jesus, my board would have nailed me to a cross. 619 00:23:48,461 --> 00:23:52,294 Well, I think we're just about ready to get going here, uh... 620 00:23:52,294 --> 00:23:53,378 Oh. Hey! 621 00:23:53,378 --> 00:23:55,712 Oh, good, there he is. What's he doing here? 622 00:23:55,712 --> 00:24:00,545 He is here because I asked him to be. 623 00:24:00,545 --> 00:24:02,211 I want him to be one of our developers. 624 00:24:02,211 --> 00:24:04,545 What? No! Fuck that guy! 625 00:24:04,545 --> 00:24:06,003 Hey, man, how's it goin'? 626 00:24:06,003 --> 00:24:07,420 Richard. Deedee. 627 00:24:07,420 --> 00:24:08,712 Can I talk to you? Yeah! 628 00:24:08,712 --> 00:24:10,378 No, no, no. Actually, look! 629 00:24:10,378 --> 00:24:12,211 Look, guys, I... 630 00:24:12,211 --> 00:24:14,878 I asked you to be a part of this 631 00:24:14,878 --> 00:24:18,378 because I thought you were willing to take a chance 632 00:24:18,378 --> 00:24:19,837 on my idea. 633 00:24:19,837 --> 00:24:21,712 An entirely new Internet. 634 00:24:21,712 --> 00:24:23,670 An Internet that is everything 635 00:24:23,670 --> 00:24:26,503 the old Internet is supposed to be, but isn't. 636 00:24:26,503 --> 00:24:28,837 Truly free and truly open. 637 00:24:28,837 --> 00:24:30,420 Well, I'm sorry, gang. 638 00:24:30,420 --> 00:24:33,586 Truly open means "open to everyone." 639 00:24:33,586 --> 00:24:36,503 No matter how repugnant their views are. 640 00:24:36,503 --> 00:24:38,420 How ignorant or stupid, 641 00:24:38,420 --> 00:24:40,628 or, to be honest, totally fucking wrong. 642 00:24:40,628 --> 00:24:42,586 And, look, who are we to judge, right? 643 00:24:42,586 --> 00:24:44,044 There's some people out there that believe 644 00:24:44,044 --> 00:24:46,044 that we're living in a computer simulation. 645 00:24:46,044 --> 00:24:48,086 Well, that is supported by the evidence. 646 00:24:49,211 --> 00:24:50,169 What? 647 00:24:50,169 --> 00:24:52,336 Uh, it's basic probability theory. 648 00:24:52,336 --> 00:24:55,712 Right, uh, Richard, can I talk to you for just a sec? Yes, of course. 649 00:24:56,920 --> 00:24:59,294 Uh, that's bullshit actually. 650 00:24:59,294 --> 00:25:00,378 It's been disproven. 651 00:25:00,378 --> 00:25:01,712 But why does that even matter? 652 00:25:01,712 --> 00:25:03,962 In a few years, we'll all be working for robots. 653 00:25:03,962 --> 00:25:05,420 No, that's stupid. 654 00:25:05,420 --> 00:25:06,753 The robots will be working for us. 655 00:25:06,753 --> 00:25:08,586 Robots? Who gives a fuck about robots? 656 00:25:08,586 --> 00:25:11,003 It's the artificial super intelligence we should be worried about. 657 00:25:11,003 --> 00:25:12,586 Exactly, and that's why we have to stop it. 658 00:25:12,586 --> 00:25:14,753 Stop it? No, that's the us I'm talking about. 659 00:25:14,753 --> 00:25:16,628 We have to bring it into existence. 660 00:25:16,628 --> 00:25:19,503 Otherwise, it'll find out who didn't believe in it, and punish them. 661 00:25:19,503 --> 00:25:21,753 Clark: Right. Guys, I was wrong. 662 00:25:21,753 --> 00:25:24,294 Um, Deedee is... 663 00:25:24,294 --> 00:25:27,503 not in. He's actually very much out. 664 00:25:27,503 --> 00:25:28,837 So... 665 00:25:28,837 --> 00:25:31,378 do-over on the whole speech. 666 00:25:31,378 --> 00:25:32,753 Fuck that guy! 667 00:25:32,753 --> 00:25:34,128 Christians suck! 668 00:25:34,128 --> 00:25:36,962 And, uh, here's a good side effect though. 669 00:25:36,962 --> 00:25:39,003 Uh, we all get to keep the name OctoPipers. 670 00:25:41,586 --> 00:25:44,712 You know what? Why don't we just take a quick five? 671 00:25:44,712 --> 00:25:46,837 And then, we'll BRB, 672 00:25:46,837 --> 00:25:48,545 and then, go teams. 673 00:25:48,545 --> 00:25:50,545 So just-- let's have a-- 674 00:25:54,169 --> 00:25:55,670 What just happened? 675 00:25:55,670 --> 00:25:57,670 Deedee's out? 676 00:25:57,670 --> 00:25:59,545 Yeah, well, he said 677 00:25:59,545 --> 00:26:02,003 that right after he bailed on us, 678 00:26:02,003 --> 00:26:05,169 he went out and made a deal with our competitor. 679 00:26:05,169 --> 00:26:09,336 But we don't have any competitors. Richard? 680 00:26:11,628 --> 00:26:13,294 Richard: Fuckin' Jian-Yang. 681 00:26:13,294 --> 00:26:15,503 I'm gonna tear him a new asshole. 682 00:26:15,503 --> 00:26:18,461 It wasn't enough to do New Snapchat or New Expedia, 683 00:26:18,461 --> 00:26:20,336 he had to do New Pied Piper too? 684 00:26:20,336 --> 00:26:21,795 Where did he get our code? 685 00:26:21,795 --> 00:26:23,712 He was always stealing snacks from the office. 686 00:26:23,712 --> 00:26:25,420 He could've lifted it from anywhere. 687 00:26:25,420 --> 00:26:27,837 I guess that's what happened to my lavender cheese. 688 00:26:27,837 --> 00:26:30,211 Richard: Jian-Yang! Open up! 689 00:26:35,503 --> 00:26:36,837 Gilfoyle: What the fuck? 690 00:26:36,837 --> 00:26:39,712 Why does every home I've ever loved get stripped? 691 00:26:40,795 --> 00:26:43,378 Is that Erlich in the bucket? 692 00:26:43,378 --> 00:26:45,378 ♪ ♪ 693 00:26:50,545 --> 00:26:51,712 Uh... 694 00:26:51,712 --> 00:26:53,044 "Richard... 695 00:26:53,044 --> 00:26:57,086 "Hello, I went to China to do new new Internet. 696 00:26:59,712 --> 00:27:02,294 "Thank you. Enjoy your house. 697 00:27:02,294 --> 00:27:03,753 "I love you. 698 00:27:03,753 --> 00:27:05,420 Jian-Yang." 699 00:28:20,962 --> 00:28:22,169 I'm here with Pied Piper CEO Richard Hendricks, 700 00:28:22,169 --> 00:28:24,128 and newly minted COO Jared Dunn. 701 00:28:24,128 --> 00:28:26,169 Tell me what your new internet is, 702 00:28:26,169 --> 00:28:28,461 and why Gavin Belson should be afraid of it. 703 00:28:31,169 --> 00:28:32,294 ♪ ♪ 704 00:28:32,545 --> 00:28:34,753 HOOVER: Sir, I had no idea they were this far along. 705 00:28:34,753 --> 00:28:35,795 You must be furious. 706 00:28:36,169 --> 00:28:37,294 That's the thing. 707 00:28:38,253 --> 00:28:39,169 I'm not. 708 00:28:40,461 --> 00:28:42,962 So, we're just giving a random company 709 00:28:42,962 --> 00:28:45,044 a bunch of free compute power on our network? 710 00:28:45,044 --> 00:28:46,670 Some company called Eklow. 711 00:28:46,670 --> 00:28:47,795 BERTRAM GILFOYLE: The AI company? 712 00:28:47,795 --> 00:28:50,128 Follow me, I'll introduce you to her. 713 00:28:50,128 --> 00:28:51,169 Sorry 714 00:28:52,169 --> 00:28:53,169 Fiona. 715 00:28:54,169 --> 00:28:56,336 -Good morning. 716 00:28:57,628 --> 00:28:59,253 ♪ 717 00:28:59,253 --> 00:29:00,503 Yeah, sure. Yep. 718 00:29:00,503 --> 00:29:02,962 ♪ ♪