1
00:00:04,380 --> 00:00:07,920
George, look at us. We're the
neighborhood watch, and you've got us

2
00:00:07,920 --> 00:00:12,480
criminals. Safety video said we're
supposed to wear our reflector vests.

3
00:00:12,620 --> 00:00:14,480
we have the element of surprise.

4
00:00:15,300 --> 00:00:19,020
97 % of all arrests are made by
undercover cops.

5
00:00:20,980 --> 00:00:24,040
Okay, the vest was too small. My head
didn't fit through the neck hole.

6
00:00:24,660 --> 00:00:27,280
We can't make arrests anyway. We're not
even armed.

7
00:00:28,010 --> 00:00:30,690
I don't need to be armed. My body is my
weapon. Watch out.

8
00:00:32,250 --> 00:00:35,550
I don't want to hear about your two
weeks of judo at the Y again.

9
00:00:36,390 --> 00:00:37,670
You don't think I know what I'm doing?

10
00:00:37,890 --> 00:00:38,890
Grab my shirt.

11
00:00:41,650 --> 00:00:43,450
I'm not going to grab your shirt.

12
00:00:43,910 --> 00:00:45,670
Go ahead. Grab it. What are you afraid
of, punk?

13
00:00:48,210 --> 00:00:49,210
Fine.

14
00:00:50,750 --> 00:00:51,910
Not at the bottom.

15
00:00:52,730 --> 00:00:56,270
Grab the shirt at the bottom. Grab it
like you want to kill me.

16
00:00:56,620 --> 00:00:57,680
That I can do.

17
00:00:59,240 --> 00:01:01,320
You're still not getting it. Here, let
me show you.

18
00:01:06,140 --> 00:01:09,760
It's not what you think, officer. I'm
just teaching her a lesson.

19
00:01:12,720 --> 00:01:14,180
Put your hands in the air.

20
00:01:16,120 --> 00:01:18,580
Now wave them like you just don't care.

21
00:01:24,020 --> 00:01:25,020
Sanchez!

22
00:01:32,259 --> 00:01:34,120
Last night, I made a homeless guy do the
robot.

23
00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:36,940
What are you two doing out here?

24
00:01:37,900 --> 00:01:38,900
Neighborhood watch patrol.

25
00:01:39,420 --> 00:01:41,040
Well, you shouldn't be dressed in dark
clothes.

26
00:01:41,300 --> 00:01:42,300
Didn't you see the video?

27
00:01:43,900 --> 00:01:46,740
I tried to tell her, but you know women,
black is slimming.

28
00:01:47,760 --> 00:01:49,800
Someday your vanity's gonna get us both
killed.

29
00:01:51,500 --> 00:01:52,680
Next time, we're the best.

30
00:01:53,420 --> 00:01:56,180
One of your neighbors called saying
there was some suspicious -looking

31
00:01:56,180 --> 00:01:57,180
walking around in hoodies.

32
00:01:57,500 --> 00:02:00,840
Why would someone report us? Everyone in
the neighborhood knows who we are.

33
00:02:01,340 --> 00:02:04,040
It's Mr. Sorkin, the new guy who just
moved in over there.

34
00:02:04,320 --> 00:02:08,900
All units, we have a 647, a naked woman
on foot chasing a truck at the corner of

35
00:02:08,900 --> 00:02:09,900
Riverside and Pass.

36
00:02:11,080 --> 00:02:12,180
Angie, where's my mom?

37
00:02:14,940 --> 00:02:16,660
I just talked to her. She's at the
house.

38
00:02:17,480 --> 00:02:20,980
Lucky it's not my mom naked. You see a
lot of nasty stuff out here, but there's

39
00:02:20,980 --> 00:02:21,980
no training for that.

40
00:02:35,980 --> 00:02:38,660
Mr. Sorkin, we should go over there and
introduce ourselves.

41
00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:41,920
Angie, I hate meeting new people. I
didn't want to meet our kids after they

42
00:02:41,920 --> 00:02:47,180
born. You tried when they were born.
Because I wasted three Sundays on

43
00:02:47,320 --> 00:02:49,160
and they still shut you up like a
junkie.

44
00:02:56,540 --> 00:02:58,020
Should I help you?

45
00:02:58,360 --> 00:03:01,660
Hi, I'm Angie Lopez, and this is my
husband, George.

46
00:03:01,960 --> 00:03:05,300
We're the neighborhood watch captains.
Oh, thank God.

47
00:03:05,840 --> 00:03:07,960
Chester Sorkin, nice to meet you.

48
00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:11,120
I saw you two in those sweatshirts and
the dark clothes.

49
00:03:11,540 --> 00:03:13,040
I thought you were casing houses.

50
00:03:14,620 --> 00:03:15,620
Casing houses?

51
00:03:15,920 --> 00:03:17,600
Not tonight, we're just stripping cars.

52
00:03:18,680 --> 00:03:20,020
What year is this, 2004?

53
00:03:20,740 --> 00:03:22,980
I don't know you.

54
00:03:23,360 --> 00:03:25,620
My husband wanted us to go undercover.

55
00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:28,000
Oh, I'm glad you told me that.

56
00:03:28,220 --> 00:03:31,900
I could have done something stupid,
mistaking you people for the bad ones.

57
00:03:35,660 --> 00:03:39,040
Did you hear that, Angie? You people,
the bad ones?

58
00:03:39,360 --> 00:03:41,120
George, don't overreact.

59
00:03:41,400 --> 00:03:44,940
Overreact? He saw two Latino people
walking down the street, and he called

60
00:03:44,940 --> 00:03:47,060
cops racist. Okay, I hate him.

61
00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:50,420
You're reading too much into this.

62
00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:51,539
Am I?

63
00:03:51,540 --> 00:03:52,760
Let's get another opinion.

64
00:03:53,060 --> 00:03:57,000
Why don't we wake up the statue of the
sleeping Mexican and ask him?

65
00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,280
Okay, that's a little offensive.

66
00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:04,780
Not a racist. I told you. Hey.

67
00:04:05,150 --> 00:04:07,830
You're lucky you're married to one of
the smart ones.

68
00:04:09,570 --> 00:04:13,470
Let's just go home and we'll figure
something out. Angie, I am not putting

69
00:04:13,470 --> 00:04:16,230
with this. And my mom's going to be mad,
too. That thing looks just like her.

70
00:04:17,769 --> 00:04:21,709
Yeah, it's got a sombrero on. Not the
sleeping Mexican, the garden gnome.

71
00:04:23,630 --> 00:04:27,630
You put my mom in a pointy hat, let her
beard grow, they could be twins.

72
00:05:00,620 --> 00:05:04,060
Jordan just got home. Did you see how
dirty his car is? He probably drives all

73
00:05:04,060 --> 00:05:05,940
the way to Utah so white people can wash
it.

74
00:05:07,720 --> 00:05:10,920
Well, I'm not having any luck here. I've
looked through every city ordinance

75
00:05:10,920 --> 00:05:15,060
they've ever passed, and there is
nothing about keeping a racially

76
00:05:15,060 --> 00:05:16,160
statue on your lawn.

77
00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:20,140
Although, we can still keep chickens in
our carriage house.

78
00:05:24,860 --> 00:05:26,720
George, I'm ready, man. Let's go do
this.

79
00:05:30,790 --> 00:05:31,790
Do what?

80
00:05:31,930 --> 00:05:33,550
Listen, you keep looking on the
computer.

81
00:05:33,890 --> 00:05:36,950
We're going to go over and ask him very
nicely to take the statue down.

82
00:05:37,590 --> 00:05:38,950
Why are you taking Ernie with you?

83
00:05:40,070 --> 00:05:41,730
Because he's very articulate.

84
00:05:41,990 --> 00:05:44,750
Hey, he was on the debate team in high
school, remember? He was the timekeeper.

85
00:05:46,430 --> 00:05:48,590
Yeah, but he was very good at it. Ernie?

86
00:05:49,910 --> 00:05:50,910
Time!

87
00:05:53,690 --> 00:05:56,830
You're going over there to threaten
Sorkin and Ernie is your backup?

88
00:05:57,240 --> 00:05:59,840
What's he going to do, stand there and
scream like a girl while you get hit?

89
00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:03,760
If that's what it takes, eh?

90
00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:08,340
Look, Angie, guys like this don't care
about ordinances. You saw the statue?

91
00:06:08,580 --> 00:06:12,240
He might as well have a neon sign on his
lawn that says all Mexicans are lazy

92
00:06:12,240 --> 00:06:13,240
and dumb.

93
00:06:14,320 --> 00:06:16,020
Do you think he knows I'm a specialist?

94
00:06:18,520 --> 00:06:20,880
Max, this has nothing to do with being
Mexican.

95
00:06:21,280 --> 00:06:24,480
That's because your mom read to you
every night. Now books make you sleepy.

96
00:06:27,080 --> 00:06:30,880
Everyone, just stop. You can't go over
there and get in this guy's face.

97
00:06:31,100 --> 00:06:33,040
What if he's crazy? What if he has a
gun?

98
00:06:33,780 --> 00:06:34,779
She's right.

99
00:06:34,780 --> 00:06:36,100
That's why we need some lumber.

100
00:06:36,540 --> 00:06:38,780
You know what they call this in the
hands of a judo master?

101
00:06:39,240 --> 00:06:41,580
The last thing he touches before he
dies?

102
00:06:43,400 --> 00:06:44,680
What the hell's going on?

103
00:06:44,920 --> 00:06:47,080
A racist just moved in down the block.

104
00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:51,040
He's a white guy that has a statue of a
sleeping Mexican on his lawn.

105
00:06:52,040 --> 00:06:56,710
That is just... like white people, you
know, to take a whole group and say

106
00:06:56,710 --> 00:06:57,850
they're all the same.

107
00:07:00,050 --> 00:07:01,050
Come on, Ernie.

108
00:07:01,270 --> 00:07:04,210
I am not letting you out of this house
with that bat.

109
00:07:04,430 --> 00:07:05,670
Yeah? How you gonna stop me?

110
00:07:08,910 --> 00:07:11,530
Okay, I dare you to give it back to me.
Try it again. I wasn't ready.

111
00:07:13,450 --> 00:07:17,270
You're just gonna get hurt. You've got
the reflexes of a drunk grandma.

112
00:07:34,030 --> 00:07:35,710
with this kind of stuff right away, it
spreads.

113
00:07:36,490 --> 00:07:37,650
I think Dad's right.

114
00:07:38,030 --> 00:07:39,770
There's even racism in my school.

115
00:07:40,170 --> 00:07:43,850
I'm pretty sure I'm getting a D in math
because my teacher hates Latinos.

116
00:07:44,650 --> 00:07:47,290
Max, 50 % of your class is Latino.

117
00:07:48,390 --> 00:07:49,369
No way.

118
00:07:49,370 --> 00:07:52,370
There are like 30 kids and only 15 are
Latino. Oh, God.

119
00:07:56,110 --> 00:07:57,610
You're not helping the cause.

120
00:07:59,430 --> 00:08:03,230
I want you to go up to your room and
don't come back down for 50 % of an

121
00:08:05,770 --> 00:08:07,310
You know we're going to have to go up
there and get him, right?

122
00:08:09,050 --> 00:08:14,270
Look, I'm going to write Mr. Sorkin a
strongly worded letter outlining why we

123
00:08:14,270 --> 00:08:18,490
think his statue is offensive and ask
him to respect our feelings and remove

124
00:08:18,910 --> 00:08:25,170
And I'm going to put it directly into
his mailbox.

125
00:08:25,910 --> 00:08:29,670
I bet if that was a statue of a Cuban
wasting everybody's time by writing a

126
00:08:29,670 --> 00:08:30,670
letter you'd think is offensive.

127
00:08:34,919 --> 00:08:36,580
is mightier than the sword.

128
00:08:36,880 --> 00:08:40,640
Yeah? That's why in Scarface, at the end
of the movie, he walks in and says, Say

129
00:08:40,640 --> 00:08:42,419
hello to my little friend!

130
00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:54,660
George, I just finished the letter, and
I put it on official stationery.

131
00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:56,380
N .W .A.

132
00:08:57,820 --> 00:08:59,860
Ice Cube and Dr. Dre's old group?

133
00:09:01,560 --> 00:09:03,420
You're sending this to a racist?

134
00:09:05,349 --> 00:09:06,349
That NWA?

135
00:09:06,470 --> 00:09:08,190
The Neighborhood Watch Association.

136
00:09:09,150 --> 00:09:11,670
Okay, Angie, but look, I think the
letter should scare him a little. I

137
00:09:11,670 --> 00:09:14,730
white out the little crime dog and sign
it, Wu -Tang Clan!

138
00:09:20,630 --> 00:09:21,630
Oh,

139
00:09:22,450 --> 00:09:23,450
Sorkin, what do you want?

140
00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:26,670
I was wondering if you knew anything
about this.

141
00:09:28,710 --> 00:09:29,910
It's called a sombrero.

142
00:09:30,790 --> 00:09:33,910
Anything else you need to know is on
Telemundo. Thank you for stopping by.

143
00:09:33,910 --> 00:09:34,910
un bueno dia.

144
00:09:37,450 --> 00:09:41,290
Somebody smashed my statue last night,
and I think I know who it was.

145
00:09:41,690 --> 00:09:44,670
Well, it wasn't a Mexican, because we
were up all night drinking tequila, and

146
00:09:44,670 --> 00:09:47,970
after the cockfight, we all fell asleep
in the yard under our hats. Goodbye.

147
00:09:52,050 --> 00:09:53,050
No.

148
00:09:53,950 --> 00:09:55,250
Don't jerk me around, Lopez.

149
00:09:55,670 --> 00:09:58,470
You smashed my statue. Look, man, I
didn't do it.

150
00:09:58,690 --> 00:10:02,550
Oh, come on. You were at my house last
night. I know you saw it. That doesn't

151
00:10:02,550 --> 00:10:04,410
mean anything. Maybe the statue woke up.

152
00:10:04,640 --> 00:10:07,840
realized it was a racist lawn ornament
and smashed itself.

153
00:10:10,100 --> 00:10:13,000
Everyone, everyone calm down.

154
00:10:13,340 --> 00:10:14,820
It's not racist.

155
00:10:15,060 --> 00:10:18,180
It's a piece of art. I paid 50 bucks for
that. And you know what?

156
00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:20,820
It was made by Mexicans in Mexico.

157
00:10:22,040 --> 00:10:23,980
Dude, it's not 1950.

158
00:10:24,480 --> 00:10:27,940
Okay, you live in a neighborhood that's
half Mexican -American. How would you

159
00:10:27,940 --> 00:10:31,980
feel if I had a statue of a white guy in
my lawn accusing people of crimes they

160
00:10:31,980 --> 00:10:32,980
didn't commit? He'd be like that.

161
00:10:36,300 --> 00:10:37,300
You know what?

162
00:10:37,400 --> 00:10:40,960
I don't care whether you like my statue
or not. You don't have the right to

163
00:10:40,960 --> 00:10:43,080
smash it. And that's what I told the
cops.

164
00:10:43,400 --> 00:10:46,140
Hey, I didn't smash it. Yes, you did.

165
00:10:46,560 --> 00:10:47,560
You.

166
00:10:47,820 --> 00:10:48,820
That's the point.

167
00:10:49,380 --> 00:10:52,240
Take a picture. We'll send it down to
Mexico. We'll get a Mickey statue like

168
00:10:52,240 --> 00:10:53,240
that.

169
00:10:54,220 --> 00:10:59,560
Mr. Sorkin, my husband and I are both
hardworking, honest people who would

170
00:10:59,560 --> 00:11:01,880
never, ever destroy someone else's
property.

171
00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:03,560
We don't believe... even violent.

172
00:11:03,940 --> 00:11:06,880
And we have nothing to hide from the
police.

173
00:11:07,180 --> 00:11:08,180
Good day.

174
00:11:09,600 --> 00:11:10,600
You idiot!

175
00:11:10,940 --> 00:11:12,440
Now we have to hide from the police.

176
00:11:14,700 --> 00:11:17,620
Angie, I told you I didn't do it. Why
would I lie to you?

177
00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:21,900
I don't know. Why did my neck turn green
from that gold necklace you bought me?

178
00:11:22,560 --> 00:11:27,360
It's Peruvian gold in Peru. A green neck
is a sign of royalty.

179
00:11:28,980 --> 00:11:32,340
I'm the Prince of Cochina. Come over
here. George, just stop lying.

180
00:11:32,600 --> 00:11:34,420
I know you broke the statue.

181
00:11:35,140 --> 00:11:36,480
Oh, he didn't break it.

182
00:11:37,420 --> 00:11:39,340
How do you know? Because I did.

183
00:11:40,560 --> 00:11:41,560
You see?

184
00:11:42,880 --> 00:11:45,660
You didn't happen to get a picture of
yourself with that garden on, did you?

185
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:48,980
Benny, what were you thinking?

186
00:11:49,340 --> 00:11:50,460
You're on probation.

187
00:11:51,200 --> 00:11:55,620
You know, I have taken crap from people
like that my whole life.

188
00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:59,780
They think Mexicans are all lazy or
they're criminals.

189
00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:04,680
In eighth grade, my teacher had her
wallet stolen, and my locker was the

190
00:12:04,680 --> 00:12:05,680
one they searched.

191
00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:08,580
Please tell me they didn't find it in
there.

192
00:12:10,200 --> 00:12:14,880
Hell no. All they found was a bottle of
scotch, which I paid for myself with my

193
00:12:14,880 --> 00:12:15,900
babysitting money.

194
00:12:17,880 --> 00:12:20,800
What if someone saw you? Nobody saw me.

195
00:12:21,480 --> 00:12:24,520
You're the neighborhood watch, and I had
to tell you that I did it.

196
00:12:27,900 --> 00:12:29,180
Do I want to hear this?

197
00:12:29,560 --> 00:12:32,580
Or should I leave now so I can pass the
lie detector test later?

198
00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:36,080
No, you can stay.

199
00:12:36,380 --> 00:12:39,280
If it has test in the name, you're
probably not going to pass it anyway.

200
00:12:41,980 --> 00:12:47,100
Max, your grandmother did something very
wrong. She went across the street and

201
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:48,480
broke Mr. Sorkin's statue.

202
00:12:48,860 --> 00:12:52,920
Well, hold on, Angie. It's not that
simple. Yes, it is. She broke the law.

203
00:12:53,680 --> 00:12:54,680
Max,

204
00:12:54,920 --> 00:12:56,900
your grandma stood up for something she
believed in.

205
00:12:57,390 --> 00:13:00,730
Was it a crime for Rosa Parks to sit
where she wanted on the bus?

206
00:13:01,310 --> 00:13:04,390
Was it a crime for Cesar Chavez to
protest in the fields?

207
00:13:04,890 --> 00:13:09,430
Was it a crime for President Nixon to
sneak in the hotel and watch Deep

208
00:13:09,550 --> 00:13:10,550
George.

209
00:13:12,350 --> 00:13:13,410
That's not what happened.

210
00:13:13,930 --> 00:13:17,130
I'm pretty sure it was Nixon at the
Watercress Motel. George.

211
00:13:19,050 --> 00:13:23,250
You're making this all sound like your
mom did a good thing. It was vandalism.

212
00:13:23,880 --> 00:13:27,220
No, it wasn't, Angie. Look, I've seen my
mom smash a lot of things.

213
00:13:27,680 --> 00:13:30,660
Piggy banks, car windows, my hopes and
dreams.

214
00:13:32,400 --> 00:13:38,240
But this time, it was for justice. Mom,
I've never said this before, but I'm

215
00:13:38,240 --> 00:13:38,999
proud of you.

216
00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:40,000
Viva la raza!

217
00:13:42,940 --> 00:13:44,880
Weren't you afraid you'd get busted,
Grandma?

218
00:13:45,140 --> 00:13:46,140
Hell no!

219
00:13:46,580 --> 00:13:48,600
Because she was taking care of business,
Mac.

220
00:13:48,900 --> 00:13:52,420
Now Sorkin knows we're not going to take
it, and he's never going to mess with

221
00:13:52,420 --> 00:13:53,420
us again.

222
00:13:53,690 --> 00:13:54,690
Who's messing with you?

223
00:13:54,910 --> 00:13:58,510
A guy on the street put up a racist
statue, and Grandma took it out.

224
00:13:59,590 --> 00:14:02,450
It wasn't a Mexican sleeping in a
sombrero, was it?

225
00:14:02,850 --> 00:14:04,890
Yeah, why, you saw it? Just a minute
ago.

226
00:14:05,430 --> 00:14:06,950
He's putting two of them up now.

227
00:14:07,610 --> 00:14:09,410
One on either side of the burro.

228
00:14:12,510 --> 00:14:14,790
Well, now there's a burro.

229
00:14:16,530 --> 00:14:19,410
One more nighttime raid, and I bet we
get the bandito.

230
00:14:21,050 --> 00:14:22,770
This just proves he's a racist.

231
00:14:23,070 --> 00:14:24,870
And he needs to learn another lesson.
No.

232
00:14:25,330 --> 00:14:31,490
Benny already got lucky once. And if you
go, I swear, by all that is holy, we

233
00:14:31,490 --> 00:14:36,750
will have a fight that will make every
fight we've ever had seem like a little

234
00:14:36,750 --> 00:14:38,270
chat over tea.

235
00:14:42,910 --> 00:14:43,910
She'll get over it.

236
00:14:45,730 --> 00:14:49,470
I say when she goes to sleep, grab a
couple of baseball bats and head over

237
00:14:49,470 --> 00:14:51,910
there. This guy's not going to win. I'm
coming with you.

238
00:14:52,780 --> 00:14:55,660
Look, I appreciate it, Vic, but this
isn't your fight. Oh, I understand.

239
00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:57,780
Just know that I share your pain.

240
00:14:58,340 --> 00:15:02,580
The Cuban people and the Mexican people
have always stood side by side.

241
00:15:05,140 --> 00:15:06,140
When?

242
00:15:07,940 --> 00:15:10,220
Well, I guess at your wedding.

243
00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:13,740
That's the only time I can think of.

244
00:15:15,860 --> 00:15:17,320
Let this be a lesson to you, Max.

245
00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:22,060
There are certain things a Lopez man has
to do no matter what anyone else says.

246
00:15:23,760 --> 00:15:25,080
Then why don't you tell Mom?

247
00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:29,880
Because there are other things a low
-pass man likes to do and wants to keep

248
00:15:29,880 --> 00:15:30,880
doing them.

249
00:15:39,120 --> 00:15:40,120
Mama, wake up.

250
00:15:40,780 --> 00:15:43,180
What the hell took you so long?

251
00:15:43,500 --> 00:15:46,900
I was giving Angie a back rub to put her
to sleep, and she started talking to me

252
00:15:46,900 --> 00:15:49,460
about her day, and the next thing I
know, I was out.

253
00:15:51,310 --> 00:15:53,730
You made me wait so long that I dozed
off, too.

254
00:15:54,970 --> 00:15:58,370
George, we had a job to do and we fell
asleep.

255
00:15:58,690 --> 00:16:00,270
We're sleeping Mexicans.

256
00:16:02,550 --> 00:16:03,730
No, we're not.

257
00:16:04,490 --> 00:16:05,990
See, this is what racism does.

258
00:16:06,330 --> 00:16:09,150
It makes you feel guilty about sleeping.
Everybody sleeps at night.

259
00:16:12,750 --> 00:16:13,750
Hey.

260
00:16:15,110 --> 00:16:17,070
What are you doing outside? You're
supposed to be in bed.

261
00:16:17,350 --> 00:16:19,590
Dad, I've got to show you something.
It's so cool.

262
00:16:31,120 --> 00:16:32,520
Sanchez, come on in. Hey, George.

263
00:16:33,780 --> 00:16:34,820
Is your son home?

264
00:16:35,860 --> 00:16:37,440
Yeah, he's upstairs. Why?

265
00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:40,000
Well, I saw him running down the street.

266
00:16:40,420 --> 00:16:42,380
Then I drove Pat's organs out.

267
00:16:43,240 --> 00:16:44,660
Somebody smashed all the statues.

268
00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:46,520
I think it was Max.

269
00:16:48,980 --> 00:16:49,980
Give me a second.

270
00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:14,220
Can you do me a favor and let me handle
this? I'll make sure that Max pays for

271
00:17:14,220 --> 00:17:15,220
the statues.

272
00:17:16,040 --> 00:17:19,119
Look, George, you're my friend, so I'm
not going to turn him in.

273
00:17:19,540 --> 00:17:21,700
But next time, I might have to.

274
00:17:21,940 --> 00:17:24,280
It's not going to be a next time. I
appreciate it, Hector.

275
00:17:24,660 --> 00:17:25,660
All right, you got it.

276
00:17:26,040 --> 00:17:27,420
And don't worry about Sorkin.

277
00:17:28,079 --> 00:17:31,600
Apparently, your wife circulated a
pretty strongly worded letter that she

278
00:17:31,600 --> 00:17:34,820
to him, and it got the entire
neighborhood fired up enough to start a

279
00:17:35,500 --> 00:17:37,400
It's amazing how effective a letter can
be.

280
00:17:40,750 --> 00:17:44,590
You know, that was my idea. You know,
the pen is mightier than the source.

281
00:17:49,750 --> 00:17:51,030
Officer Sanchez?

282
00:17:52,010 --> 00:17:56,410
If you're here to get my uncle's
blessing to ask me out, do not bother.

283
00:17:56,410 --> 00:17:57,410
ask.

284
00:17:59,210 --> 00:18:02,970
I thought you were dating a fireman.
What is this, your salute to America's

285
00:18:02,970 --> 00:18:03,970
heroes?

286
00:18:05,190 --> 00:18:07,670
Uncle George, you're so funny. Now be
quiet.

287
00:18:09,640 --> 00:18:10,579
free Saturday.

288
00:18:10,580 --> 00:18:11,580
Do you want to go dancing?

289
00:18:12,640 --> 00:18:14,680
I always feel like people are judging
me.

290
00:18:16,740 --> 00:18:17,740
Let's just get a movie.

291
00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:19,820
See you, George. See you.

292
00:18:21,580 --> 00:18:22,580
Oh,

293
00:18:23,780 --> 00:18:25,060
you're up late.

294
00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:29,600
Well, Max, dude, something really stupid
and it's my fault for setting a bad

295
00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:33,260
example for him. Oh, really? I saw K
-Pad getting thrown at a sky bar.

296
00:18:35,600 --> 00:18:36,600
Yeah, well...

297
00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:38,620
I guess we both have important things to
think about.

298
00:18:46,100 --> 00:18:48,480
Relax. Officer Sanchez is gone.

299
00:18:48,800 --> 00:18:49,800
What did he say?

300
00:18:50,160 --> 00:18:52,800
Max, he saw you running. He knows you
broke the statues.

301
00:18:53,860 --> 00:18:54,860
Am I in trouble?

302
00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:56,200
No, he's going to let it go.

303
00:18:56,620 --> 00:18:58,420
Yes! We got Sorkin!

304
00:18:59,180 --> 00:19:00,920
Max, we didn't get anyone.

305
00:19:02,020 --> 00:19:03,700
When I saw you in that video...

306
00:19:04,080 --> 00:19:06,840
You look like a little thug, man. That's
not what I want for you.

307
00:19:07,060 --> 00:19:10,100
But you said there are things a Lopez
man has to do.

308
00:19:10,560 --> 00:19:12,640
And you didn't care when Grandma did it.

309
00:19:14,260 --> 00:19:15,260
Look, have a seat.

310
00:19:20,460 --> 00:19:22,940
I got caught up in the moment. I was
wrong.

311
00:19:23,360 --> 00:19:25,960
Max, I don't want you doing anything
that Grandma does.

312
00:19:26,500 --> 00:19:28,180
Smoking, drinking, identity theft.

313
00:19:30,280 --> 00:19:31,800
She stole someone's identity?

314
00:19:33,699 --> 00:19:35,960
Call her Joey Esparza and see if she
turns around.

315
00:19:38,460 --> 00:19:40,520
But you were proud of her.

316
00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:43,200
Is that why you did this?

317
00:19:43,900 --> 00:19:45,380
Because you thought I'd be proud of you?

318
00:19:45,680 --> 00:19:47,220
Look, I'm always going to be proud of
you.

319
00:19:47,920 --> 00:19:49,820
You said I wasn't helping the cause.

320
00:19:51,360 --> 00:19:53,500
Max, you want to know how you help the
cause?

321
00:19:53,900 --> 00:19:55,000
You get an education.

322
00:19:55,460 --> 00:20:00,300
You be successful so you can buy and
sell fools like Sorkin. Hey, that's how

323
00:20:00,300 --> 00:20:01,300
really change things.

324
00:20:03,399 --> 00:20:04,480
Wait a minute.

325
00:20:05,120 --> 00:20:07,920
You can't really buy people, can you?

326
00:20:09,260 --> 00:20:11,340
Like I said, Max, get an education.