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WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

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I really like Valentine's Day
in this office.

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It's kind of like grade school.

3
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Everybody gives out
little presents and stuff.

4
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Like, last year, Jim gave me this
card with Dwight's head on it.

5
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It was horrifying
and funny and...

6
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Phyllis.

7
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You could just sign here.

8
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Roy and I
are saving for the wedding.

9
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So I made him promise not
to get me anything too big.

10
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"Happy Valentine's Day, darling.
Love, Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration."

11
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Isn't he sweet?
Oh, yeah.

12
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Wow.

13
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All right, Dwight, as you know
I'm heading to New York today,

14
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doing a presentation
on the branch to the new CFO.

15
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And you want me to come with
you. No. The opposite of that.

16
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I will stay here and run
things on this end. Very good.

17
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Question: Will you be seeing
Jan when you're in New York?

18
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I probably will.
Why do you ask?

19
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Well, it's Valentine's Day.
And you guys, you know...

20
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Well.
...screwed.

21
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What is your problem?

22
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This is a business trip. I
would have to be a raving lunatic

23
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to try to talk to Jan about
what happened between us.

24
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Her words, not mine. She sent
me an e-mail this morning.

25
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But it is Valentine's Day.

26
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It's New York.
The City of Love.

27
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Hey, Pam. You heart NY, right? You
want me to pick you up anything?

28
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That's okay.
All right.

29
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The best present would be, you do
a good job in front of the new CFO.

30
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Dude. I'm going to nail it.

31
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Me in New York? Oh, I own
that city. "Forget about it!"

32
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See you.

33
00:02:18,739 --> 00:02:20,707
Well, here we go,
on our way to New York.

34
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New York, New York.

35
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The city so nice,
they named it twice.

36
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Manhattan is the other name.

37
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So, I broke up with Katy and I
haven't been dating anybody else.

38
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So, this year I don't have to
worry about Valentine's Day.

39
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It's going to be good. I
invited a couple of friends over.

40
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We're gonna play some cards and
I'll end up winning a lot of money,

41
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because they're idiots.

42
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It's gonna be great.

43
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What's this? What is this?

44
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I don't know.
It's on your desk.

45
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Yeah, but who put it here?
And for what purpose?

46
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It was there when I sat down.

47
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"Happy Valentine's Day."

48
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It's me.

49
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I'm the Bobble Head.

50
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Yes!

51
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The meeting isn't till 3:00.

52
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But I always like to come to
New York a little bit early,

53
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and hit
some of my favorite haunts.

54
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Like right here is my
favorite New York pizza joint.

55
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And I'm going to go get me
a New York slice.

56
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Hey, Kelly, what's up?
Nothing.

57
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Oh! Except... Oh, my God, Jim.

58
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Last night, Ryan and I
totally, finally hooked up.

59
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It was awesome. That's great.
I'm really happy for you.

60
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I know, and it was so funny. 'Cause
we were at this bar with his friends,

61
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and I was sitting next to him
the whole night,

62
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and he wasn't making a move.
So in my head I was like,

63
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"Ryan, what's taking you so
long?" And then he kissed me.

64
00:04:05,646 --> 00:04:07,409
And I didn't know what to say. Wow.

65
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So I said,"
Ryan, what took you so long?"

66
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I mean, I just said it to him.
Can you believe that?

67
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Wow. Oh, my God, Jim,
is that embarrassing?

68
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I'm embarrassed.
No. Don't be.

69
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Oh, thank God, because I was
nervous, Jim. No. All right...

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You will not believe I
was so nervous. I bet.

71
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But now... Now I have
a boyfriend. All right.

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I hooked up with her
on February 13th.

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Here it is. The heart of
New York City, Times Square.

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Named for the good times
you have when you're in it.

75
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Most people,
when they come to New York,

76
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they go straight to
the Empire State Building.

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That's pretty touristy.
I come here.

78
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Great places to eat.

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We have Bubba Gump shrimp,
Red Lobster down there.

80
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You know...

81
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This is the heart
of civilization, right here.

82
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Guess what.
Really?

83
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It's from Bob, again.
That's great.

84
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Everybody takes
the subway in New York.

85
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It's fast. It's efficient.
Gets you there on time.

86
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It's a way to... Okay, there's a guy
pooping in a cardboard box down there.

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This is the world-famous
Rockefeller Center,

88
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founded, of course,
by Theodore Rockefeller.

89
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This is the skating rink.

90
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And I think the Rangers
practice there sometimes.

91
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And it's...

92
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That's Tina Fey.

93
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That's Tina Fey
from Saturday Night Live.

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Hello. Hello. Hi.

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Oh, I'm... I'm sorry.

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I thought you were...
Okay. I thought that was...

97
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She looked like... She
looked a lot like Tina Fey.

98
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Hello, hello.

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I thought that was Tina Fey,
but it wasn't. So...

100
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Are you serious? He was here?

101
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When? When I was talking
to the fake Tina Fey?

102
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Come on! Are you serious?

103
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Hello, Angela, did you hear?

104
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Somebody totally rocked the house and
got me the best present I've ever gotten.

105
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Really? I wouldn't know
anything about that.

106
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But I'm glad you enjoyed
it. Oh, I did. I did.

107
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I didn't get anything
for Valentine's Day.

108
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Oh, I bet you will,
before the day is over.

109
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Really? Well, I hope I do.

110
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I would love to live in New York
someday. It's a big dream of mine.

111
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Work at Corporate with Jan.
That would be awesome.

112
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Go to Broadway shows,
eat hot dogs.

113
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Scranton is great, but...

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New York
is like Scranton on acid.

115
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No, on speed. No, on steroids.

116
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Okay, um...

117
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I think,

118
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that's either the Hudson
or the East, so we're back...

119
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Should be back this way.

120
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There's a lot
of pressure on me right now.

121
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It's like Michael Jordan
in the NBA finals,

122
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or like
Stormin' Norman Schwarzkopf.

123
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And this presentation
is Desert Storm.

124
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And as soon as it's over,

125
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we will not have to deal
with those Iraqis anymore.

126
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Let's do it.

127
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No, that's all right. Spend money on her
instead of giving it to us, that's fine.

128
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No. I didn't even have
a seat for you anyway.

129
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Yeah.

130
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All right, man.

131
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Okay, have a good night. Bye.

132
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Phyllis Lapin?
Holy God.

133
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It's from Bob.

134
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Man, that thing's bigger
than I am. No, it's not.

135
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Oh, zip it.
Wow.

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There they are. What's up?

137
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Hey.
Hey, hey.

138
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Michael Scott.
Josh Porter. High five.

139
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Bam.
All right.

140
00:08:07,638 --> 00:08:10,004
You know Dan Gore, from
Buffalo? Yeah, how you doing?

141
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Nobody needs to introduce
this guy. Craiggers.

142
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What's up, buddy?
You have been kicked out

143
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of every strip club in Albany,
is that true? Guilty, yeah.

144
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Well... So, what's
going on? What'd I miss?

145
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Not much. They're, I guess,
running late upstairs.

146
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We're just waiting
for the presentations.

147
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Cool, good, good. Good. Give
us some time to catch up and...

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Pam.
Hi, how're you doing? Good.

149
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Listen, may I speak with you,

150
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privately?

151
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You can't fire me, Dwight,
just 'cause Michael's not here.

152
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No, Pam, just... I'm...

153
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Just...

154
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Please.

155
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You need to get something

156
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for your girlfriend?
Girlfriend, yes.

157
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And the reason I didn't get
anything for this particular person,

158
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who shall remain nameless,

159
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is that she's not really the kind of person
you'd think would be into Valentine's Day.

160
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She's kind of...
Tightly wound?

161
00:09:05,696 --> 00:09:08,563
Exactly.
Okay. Well,

162
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sometimes the gift is really
about the gesture, you know,

163
00:09:11,602 --> 00:09:14,127
like, what it means
instead of what it is.

164
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You mean, like a ham?

165
00:09:18,409 --> 00:09:20,877
No, not like a ham.

166
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It's about doing something,

167
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so that the person knows that
you really care about her,

168
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that you remember her.
Okay, I get it. That's great.

169
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Okay, shut up.
I know exactly what to do.

170
00:09:34,659 --> 00:09:36,339
What about you, Craig?
Did you lose anyone?

171
00:09:36,360 --> 00:09:37,554
Oh, man.

172
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Jan called me in September, and she's
like, "You gotta fire four people,"

173
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and I was just like,
"What?" You know.

174
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Did you? No. I just ignored
her. She is the worst.

175
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Well, she is our boss, so...

176
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She ain't my boss, dude.
I don't work for that bitch.

177
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Hey, come on,
you know, that's not...

178
00:09:54,512 --> 00:09:55,672
What?
Cool it.

179
00:09:55,746 --> 00:09:58,010
You like Jan?
How can you like Jan?

180
00:09:58,082 --> 00:09:59,982
Maybe because
she's my girlfriend.

181
00:10:02,453 --> 00:10:04,819
Was. Or not my girlfriend.
She...

182
00:10:05,556 --> 00:10:07,922
We hooked up and...
You hooked up with Jan?

183
00:10:07,992 --> 00:10:11,450
It's just, you know, it was months
ago. Just... It was just once.

184
00:10:11,529 --> 00:10:14,930
It was, God, just stupid.
Just... Just forget it.

185
00:10:14,999 --> 00:10:17,559
Yeah, let's change the
subject. Yeah, yeah.

186
00:10:20,237 --> 00:10:21,329
I don't know what he's thinking,

187
00:10:21,405 --> 00:10:24,101
but I would just be so psyched
if we just dated forever.

188
00:10:24,175 --> 00:10:26,837
Well, I'd take it slow.

189
00:10:26,911 --> 00:10:30,642
'Cause it seems like a lot of the
time, things like that need to...

190
00:10:33,851 --> 00:10:36,376
Soda.
Cool.

191
00:10:39,457 --> 00:10:43,917
Hey, so, do you want
to do something tonight, or...

192
00:10:43,995 --> 00:10:46,327
Oh, no, not while I'm here.

193
00:10:46,397 --> 00:10:48,388
I mean, I know that it's
Valentine's Day or whatever.

194
00:10:48,466 --> 00:10:52,300
But there's totally no pressure at
all of any kind whatsoever. So...

195
00:10:52,370 --> 00:10:55,066
I can't tonight.
I have plans with my friends.

196
00:10:55,406 --> 00:10:58,136
Okay, that's cool.
Okay.

197
00:10:58,209 --> 00:11:00,439
I completely understand.
Cool.

198
00:11:00,511 --> 00:11:01,603
Okay.

199
00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:24,392
Josh Porter, Stamford.

200
00:11:24,468 --> 00:11:25,594
David.
Nice to meet you.

201
00:11:25,669 --> 00:11:26,795
And Michael Scott, Scranton.

202
00:11:26,871 --> 00:11:28,668
Nice to meet you.
Ditto.

203
00:11:28,739 --> 00:11:31,264
How are you, Jan?
Fine, Michael, thank you.

204
00:11:31,709 --> 00:11:35,110
Okay. So, we are in the process
of doing a complete review

205
00:11:35,179 --> 00:11:36,669
of the company's
financial strength.

206
00:11:36,747 --> 00:11:38,476
All I'd like to do today
is to hear you...

207
00:11:38,549 --> 00:11:40,312
Nervous?
No, I'm not nervous.

208
00:11:40,384 --> 00:11:43,649
Well, I mean, I guess I'd be lying if
I didn't say I was a little nervous.

209
00:11:43,721 --> 00:11:45,780
The new CFO
is judging me on this, too.

210
00:11:45,856 --> 00:11:48,188
And, well, it is Michael, so...

211
00:11:49,460 --> 00:11:51,155
Yeah. I am very nervous.

212
00:11:51,228 --> 00:11:53,287
So, with the 12 new
local accounts,

213
00:11:53,364 --> 00:11:56,265
we had a total of
four percent organic growth,

214
00:11:56,367 --> 00:11:59,859
which was just above our pre-year
targets. Thanks very much.

215
00:11:59,937 --> 00:12:02,997
Thank you.
Okay, Michael.

216
00:12:09,213 --> 00:12:10,942
What is a business?

217
00:12:11,215 --> 00:12:15,709
Is it a collection of numbers
and sales reports?

218
00:12:15,786 --> 00:12:19,381
Sure. But, as you know,
David, and Jan,

219
00:12:19,457 --> 00:12:21,049
it is much more.

220
00:12:39,210 --> 00:12:43,169
Life moves a little slower
in Scranton, Pennsylvania.

221
00:12:43,414 --> 00:12:45,780
And that's the way we like it.

222
00:12:45,850 --> 00:12:48,318
Because at Dunder Mifflin,
Scranton,

223
00:12:48,385 --> 00:12:50,945
we're not just
in the paper business.

224
00:12:51,021 --> 00:12:53,285
We're in the people business.

225
00:12:53,858 --> 00:12:55,485
Let's meet some of the folks

226
00:12:55,559 --> 00:12:58,392
who make the Scranton branch
so special.

227
00:12:58,963 --> 00:13:03,366
This is Stanley Hudson,
one of our talented salesmen.

228
00:13:03,734 --> 00:13:06,100
An African-American
father of two,

229
00:13:06,170 --> 00:13:09,537
Stanley's dedication is no
doubt one of the hallmarks

230
00:13:09,607 --> 00:13:13,771
of the foundation of the business
we're hoping to build our basis on.

231
00:13:14,945 --> 00:13:17,072
Yeah, I shot a bunch
of footage around the office,

232
00:13:17,148 --> 00:13:19,616
edited it together on my Mac.

233
00:13:19,683 --> 00:13:23,016
Was thinking about entering it
in some festivals. Probably won't.

234
00:13:23,087 --> 00:13:25,487
You know,
not what this is about, but...

235
00:13:25,723 --> 00:13:28,624
And finally, Pam Beesly.

236
00:13:28,692 --> 00:13:31,092
Look at her. Look how cute.

237
00:13:31,162 --> 00:13:33,130
Not bad at all.

238
00:13:33,731 --> 00:13:34,959
As the receptionist,

239
00:13:35,032 --> 00:13:38,729
Pam is truly
the gateway to our world.

240
00:13:39,236 --> 00:13:42,535
Well, I hope this gave you
a little taste

241
00:13:42,606 --> 00:13:45,769
of what life is like here
at Dunder Mifflin, Scranton.

242
00:13:45,843 --> 00:13:48,937
What it's like to walk
a mile in Oscar's shoes,

243
00:13:49,013 --> 00:13:51,106
or try on Phyllis' pants.

244
00:13:51,515 --> 00:13:55,849
Next time you're in town,
give us a call. Stop on by.

245
00:13:55,920 --> 00:13:59,583
I'm sure you'll be greeted by a big
smile, and a "How're you doing, pal?"

246
00:13:59,657 --> 00:14:02,490
Maybe even one of Angela's
famous brownies.

247
00:14:02,593 --> 00:14:05,562
And you'll know
that you're home.

248
00:14:15,806 --> 00:14:17,103
Great Scott!

249
00:14:19,009 --> 00:14:20,340
Questions?

250
00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:23,404
Wow.

251
00:14:24,916 --> 00:14:27,578
Okay. Okay, thank you,
Michael, that was great.

252
00:14:27,652 --> 00:14:28,846
Yes, thank you.

253
00:14:28,920 --> 00:14:33,220
But for right now, what I'd really like
to know about is the branch's performance.

254
00:14:33,291 --> 00:14:36,089
So, do you have
that information as well?

255
00:14:36,895 --> 00:14:39,659
Yes. Absolutely, David.

256
00:14:39,731 --> 00:14:42,291
Let me get that for you. I...

257
00:14:47,472 --> 00:14:49,337
Can you sign?
Yeah.

258
00:14:50,275 --> 00:14:51,503
Oscar.

259
00:14:51,876 --> 00:14:54,174
Nothing for me?
Join the club.

260
00:14:57,849 --> 00:15:00,215
Who's it from?
My mom.

261
00:15:12,330 --> 00:15:15,766
It's frustrating, 'cause
we'd be so perfect together.

262
00:15:16,634 --> 00:15:18,795
You know what?
Here's the deal, Kelly.

263
00:15:18,870 --> 00:15:22,772
It would be really nice if he was
into you, right? It'd be great.

264
00:15:22,841 --> 00:15:26,277
But he isn't. So... Yeah, but
it would be so great if he was.

265
00:15:26,344 --> 00:15:28,972
Well, he's not, though.
So you just gotta suck it up.

266
00:15:29,047 --> 00:15:32,016
You just gotta move on,
try to have some fun.

267
00:15:32,083 --> 00:15:34,074
Come to my poker game tonight.

268
00:15:34,152 --> 00:15:35,551
Okay, cool.

269
00:15:36,087 --> 00:15:38,214
Is it okay if I invite Ryan?

270
00:15:45,463 --> 00:15:47,590
And that about does it,
thank you.

271
00:15:47,665 --> 00:15:48,825
Okay.

272
00:15:49,300 --> 00:15:50,562
Craig.

273
00:15:51,369 --> 00:15:54,770
Yeah, here's the deal.
I did not understand

274
00:15:54,839 --> 00:15:59,299
that this was supposed to be a
full-on, like, report or whatnot.

275
00:15:59,878 --> 00:16:04,212
I'm sorry, what did you think
financial presentation meant?

276
00:16:04,282 --> 00:16:08,685
I was under the impression this was more
of, like, a meet-and-greet type deal.

277
00:16:08,987 --> 00:16:12,946
So, does that mean that you don't
have the numbers on your branch?

278
00:16:13,024 --> 00:16:14,821
That is correct. Yes.

279
00:16:14,893 --> 00:16:17,885
Craig, you realize
that we're trying to decide

280
00:16:17,962 --> 00:16:19,953
whether drastic steps
need to be taken.

281
00:16:20,031 --> 00:16:21,623
Look, I'm sorry.
I didn't know.

282
00:16:21,699 --> 00:16:25,362
Well, the point is, that this doesn't
exactly bode well for your branch.

283
00:16:25,436 --> 00:16:26,630
Oh, man. You know what?

284
00:16:26,704 --> 00:16:30,037
Michael made that stupid movie,
he doesn't get in any trouble.

285
00:16:30,108 --> 00:16:32,838
Maybe I should have
slept with you, too.

286
00:16:37,782 --> 00:16:41,650
Okay, okay. All right, this... No,
no, no. I'm not... I'm not... I just...

287
00:16:41,719 --> 00:16:44,187
I just don't know
what to do anymore, Michael.

288
00:16:44,255 --> 00:16:46,223
I mean,
I'm probably gonna get fired.

289
00:16:46,291 --> 00:16:47,519
No, you're not.

290
00:16:47,592 --> 00:16:50,755
Yeah, I... Michael, the CFO
thinks that we slept together.

291
00:16:50,828 --> 00:16:53,388
Don't you understand? People
get fired for much less.

292
00:16:53,464 --> 00:16:57,366
And I just can't believe
that you told everybody.

293
00:16:57,435 --> 00:16:59,300
And we didn't even
sleep together.

294
00:16:59,370 --> 00:17:02,237
Technically, we fell asleep
in the same bed.

295
00:17:02,307 --> 00:17:03,865
So...
Oh, God.

296
00:17:03,942 --> 00:17:05,534
Michael, it was months ago.

297
00:17:05,610 --> 00:17:07,874
It was once. It's over.

298
00:17:09,814 --> 00:17:11,475
Do you understand?

299
00:17:13,151 --> 00:17:15,711
Yes, I'm sorry.

300
00:17:17,322 --> 00:17:21,588
I'll fix it. I will talk
to him. I'll talk to David.

301
00:17:22,594 --> 00:17:24,755
Surely, you cannot be serious.

302
00:17:24,829 --> 00:17:26,296
I am serious.

303
00:17:26,364 --> 00:17:29,094
"And don't call me Shirley."
Airplane!

304
00:17:38,276 --> 00:17:40,608
Women are like wolves.

305
00:17:40,678 --> 00:17:43,647
If you want a wolf,
you have to trap it.

306
00:17:43,948 --> 00:17:45,813
You have to snare it.

307
00:17:46,384 --> 00:17:48,045
And then you have to tame it.

308
00:17:48,119 --> 00:17:50,485
Keep it happy.
Care for it. Feed it.

309
00:17:50,555 --> 00:17:53,752
Lovingly. The way an
animal deserves to be loved.

310
00:17:55,727 --> 00:17:58,457
And my animal deserves
a lot of loving.

311
00:18:03,101 --> 00:18:04,864
Hey, babe.
Hey.

312
00:18:04,936 --> 00:18:07,837
You almost ready to go?
I guess. Yeah.

313
00:18:08,706 --> 00:18:10,264
What's wrong?
Nothing.

314
00:18:10,341 --> 00:18:12,036
It's just that
I had to sit here all day

315
00:18:12,110 --> 00:18:15,307
while Phyllis got, like, an
entire garden delivered to her.

316
00:18:15,380 --> 00:18:17,007
What? You're mad at me?

317
00:18:17,548 --> 00:18:19,846
I mean, I know that we said,
"No big gifts,"

318
00:18:19,917 --> 00:18:22,977
but I was, kind of, hoping you'd
get me something for Valentine's Day.

319
00:18:23,054 --> 00:18:25,454
Well, Valentine's Day
isn't over.

320
00:18:25,523 --> 00:18:29,653
Let's get you home and you are
gonna get the best sex of your life.

321
00:18:32,463 --> 00:18:34,522
You understand this is
a very serious situation.

322
00:18:34,599 --> 00:18:36,396
No, no, no, no, no.
Yes, I... Okay, well...

323
00:18:36,467 --> 00:18:39,436
All right, here's the deal. This
is my fault, this is totally on me.

324
00:18:39,504 --> 00:18:42,200
Before you guys came in,
I was talking to the guys.

325
00:18:42,273 --> 00:18:45,299
We were all chatting
and I made a joke,

326
00:18:45,376 --> 00:18:48,834
a really dumb joke, and Craig,
the idiot, took it seriously.

327
00:18:48,913 --> 00:18:51,780
You made a joke?
I did. It was stupid.

328
00:18:51,849 --> 00:18:55,808
And Craig, you saw him, he's not
the sharpest tool in the shed.

329
00:18:56,287 --> 00:18:58,187
Although he is a tool.

330
00:18:58,823 --> 00:19:01,189
Well, I don't need to explain
to you that even a joke

331
00:19:01,259 --> 00:19:03,159
about sexual relations
with your boss...

332
00:19:03,227 --> 00:19:05,092
I know.
It was borderline at best.

333
00:19:05,163 --> 00:19:09,190
And Jan is a fantastic executive

334
00:19:09,267 --> 00:19:12,065
and has all the integrity
in the world and...

335
00:19:13,204 --> 00:19:16,435
I'm really sorry, and that
will never happen again.

336
00:19:20,778 --> 00:19:23,645
That's fine.
Let's just... Just forget it.

337
00:19:24,148 --> 00:19:25,342
Okay. Good.

338
00:19:36,360 --> 00:19:38,328
Heading out?
Yeah.

339
00:19:39,397 --> 00:19:42,525
All right, Beesly.
Hey, Happy Valentine's Day.

340
00:19:43,801 --> 00:19:44,995
Bye.

341
00:19:49,574 --> 00:19:52,099
Good night, Pam.
Night, Phyllis.

342
00:19:57,215 --> 00:19:58,477
Michael.

343
00:19:58,883 --> 00:20:00,942
Thank you again for that,
really.

344
00:20:01,018 --> 00:20:02,645
It was very nice.
Oh, no big deal.

345
00:20:02,720 --> 00:20:06,486
Really, sorry again. Oh, no,
it's okay. Yeah, it's okay.

346
00:20:07,325 --> 00:20:10,021
So... Happy Valentine's Day.

347
00:20:10,094 --> 00:20:12,324
Yeah, Happy Valentine's Day.

348
00:20:19,971 --> 00:20:21,097
Okay.