1 00:00:02,502 --> 00:00:04,087 Okay, a few more announcements. 2 00:00:05,547 --> 00:00:07,841 We booked three rooms at the sober retreat, 3 00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:11,303 so I took the liberty of assigning roommates. 4 00:00:11,303 --> 00:00:12,930 Bonnie, you're with Christy. 5 00:00:14,389 --> 00:00:15,515 Tammy's with me. 6 00:00:16,975 --> 00:00:19,478 Yay, I'm with Jill! We can gab all night. 7 00:00:19,478 --> 00:00:20,938 Ooh, and I brought cards. 8 00:00:20,938 --> 00:00:23,106 Cards and gabbing! 9 00:00:23,106 --> 00:00:24,733 I wonder how many people have relapsed 10 00:00:24,733 --> 00:00:26,276 on one of these weekends. 11 00:00:26,276 --> 00:00:28,779 Trust me, you're gonna love it. 12 00:00:28,779 --> 00:00:31,490 A weekend in nature to focus on your sobriety. 13 00:00:31,490 --> 00:00:32,908 It's transformational. 14 00:00:32,908 --> 00:00:34,660 You don't have to keep selling us. 15 00:00:34,660 --> 00:00:36,703 We're all in the car, and it's moving too fast to jump. 16 00:00:36,703 --> 00:00:38,705 You could have mentioned it's all women. 17 00:00:38,705 --> 00:00:40,624 I did my roots for nothing. 18 00:00:40,624 --> 00:00:42,501 Not for nothing. You needed it. 19 00:00:42,501 --> 00:00:44,419 Ooh! You know what I need? 20 00:00:44,419 --> 00:00:45,754 That right there. 21 00:00:45,754 --> 00:00:47,506 A tricked-out Mercedes Sprinter Van 22 00:00:47,506 --> 00:00:49,258 with the 5,000-pound payload 23 00:00:49,258 --> 00:00:52,010 and a water cooler strapped to its back. 24 00:00:52,010 --> 00:00:53,553 The only thing I understood 25 00:00:53,553 --> 00:00:56,348 in that whole sentence was "Mercedes." 26 00:00:56,348 --> 00:01:00,018 Marone, I see that van in my dreams. 27 00:01:00,018 --> 00:01:03,355 My van dreams are more abduction-oriented. 28 00:01:03,355 --> 00:01:06,775 I usually get away, but they're still upsetting. 29 00:01:06,775 --> 00:01:09,444 A van like that says you're a serious contractor. 30 00:01:09,444 --> 00:01:11,280 Don't suppose there are any 31 00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:13,949 "get your hands on some quick cash" workshops this weekend? 32 00:01:13,949 --> 00:01:15,993 No, they hold those out near the airport. 33 00:01:15,993 --> 00:01:17,828 At least I held mine there. 34 00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:21,331 Wait a minute. If I'm sharing a room, 35 00:01:21,331 --> 00:01:23,375 does that mean I'm sharing a bathroom, too? 36 00:01:23,375 --> 00:01:26,336 We're all sharing one. It's a communal bathroom. 37 00:01:40,225 --> 00:01:42,477 So, nobody else but me needs to use the ladies' room? 38 00:01:42,477 --> 00:01:43,937 I'll go with you. 39 00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:46,231 My knees have been in my chin for three hours. 40 00:01:47,649 --> 00:01:49,067 Ooh.. 41 00:01:49,067 --> 00:01:51,236 We're gonna switch places after this, right? 42 00:01:51,236 --> 00:01:52,654 Yeah, sure. Next time we stop. 43 00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:55,490 Yeah. It's not fair. 44 00:01:55,490 --> 00:01:57,200 Okay, this is that precious moment 45 00:01:57,200 --> 00:01:58,452 when the hostages are left alone. 46 00:01:58,452 --> 00:02:00,329 What's the plan? 47 00:02:00,329 --> 00:02:03,498 Can I not be with Marjorie for one weekend of my life? 48 00:02:03,498 --> 00:02:04,833 Ditto my mom. 49 00:02:04,833 --> 00:02:06,710 That's cool. I'm sick of you, too. 50 00:02:06,710 --> 00:02:08,712 I say we put Wendy with Marjorie. 51 00:02:08,712 --> 00:02:10,839 Why? They're both not here. 52 00:02:10,839 --> 00:02:12,716 Great. I'll take Tammy. Yeah. 53 00:02:12,716 --> 00:02:13,925 That leaves you and me, Bonnie, 54 00:02:13,925 --> 00:02:15,302 and I know you didn't bring cards. 55 00:02:15,302 --> 00:02:16,636 I barely brought underwear. 56 00:02:21,099 --> 00:02:23,268 I thought we were taking turns sitting back here. 57 00:02:23,268 --> 00:02:25,062 Well, that was before you decided 58 00:02:25,062 --> 00:02:28,398 to eat what appears to be an antique hot dog. 59 00:02:28,398 --> 00:02:30,275 You're just jealous. 60 00:02:30,275 --> 00:02:32,611 You're eating mayonnaise on a gas station wiener, honey. 61 00:02:32,611 --> 00:02:34,363 Nobody's jealous. 62 00:02:34,363 --> 00:02:36,365 Tammy, did you bring your sleep mask, 63 00:02:36,365 --> 00:02:38,200 you know, for your night terrors? 64 00:02:38,200 --> 00:02:41,453 Not your problem, 'cause you're bunking with Wendy now. 65 00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:44,664 Wait. What? We made a couple 66 00:02:44,664 --> 00:02:47,376 of small changes to the roommate situation. 67 00:02:47,376 --> 00:02:48,960 And what are they? 68 00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:51,088 They're all different, they're locked. Let it go. 69 00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:57,969 Guys, they have goats. Did you see the goats? 70 00:02:57,969 --> 00:02:59,346 I'll go check us in. 71 00:02:59,346 --> 00:03:01,681 Ooh, free cookies. Want one? 72 00:03:01,681 --> 00:03:03,642 No, thank you. Communal bathroom? 73 00:03:03,642 --> 00:03:05,560 Nothing's going in or out all weekend. 74 00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:11,650 You know, if I had that van, I could go outside right now 75 00:03:11,650 --> 00:03:13,318 and build you your own bathroom. 76 00:03:13,318 --> 00:03:16,321 If only I had enough for a down payment. 77 00:03:16,321 --> 00:03:19,408 Where to get a down payment? 78 00:03:21,993 --> 00:03:23,954 Wendy, you want to go see your goats again? 79 00:03:23,954 --> 00:03:25,956 Hells to the yeah! 80 00:03:28,125 --> 00:03:31,169 You know that's not a real fire. 81 00:03:31,169 --> 00:03:33,255 Six people, five hours, one car. 82 00:03:33,255 --> 00:03:35,173 Let me have this. 83 00:03:35,173 --> 00:03:36,758 That's why I came alone. 84 00:03:36,758 --> 00:03:38,427 Hi. Rebecca. 85 00:03:38,427 --> 00:03:40,429 Christy. First time here? 86 00:03:40,429 --> 00:03:44,683 I actually did think this was a real fire, so, yes. 87 00:03:44,683 --> 00:03:47,269 It's my third year, so, I know all the tricks. 88 00:03:47,269 --> 00:03:49,187 See, I say I have a roommate coming 89 00:03:49,187 --> 00:03:51,398 who then backs out so I get a room to myself. 90 00:03:51,398 --> 00:03:53,191 Smart. 91 00:03:53,191 --> 00:03:56,445 My friend Sheila has broken her leg three years in a row. 92 00:03:56,445 --> 00:04:00,115 Ooh. Maybe next year, my mom can break hers. 93 00:04:00,115 --> 00:04:01,491 You're here with your mom? 94 00:04:01,491 --> 00:04:04,161 Wow. I'm here because of my mom. 95 00:04:04,161 --> 00:04:06,246 I'm both. 96 00:04:10,459 --> 00:04:12,919 Ooh! Nice! 97 00:04:14,671 --> 00:04:17,591 We have lived very different lives. 98 00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:21,595 I'd tip the bellman, but... 99 00:04:21,595 --> 00:04:24,264 apparently, that's me. 100 00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:25,849 Okay. 101 00:04:25,849 --> 00:04:30,312 Goodbye, bedding that has touched other people. 102 00:04:30,312 --> 00:04:32,814 Ooh! Welcome basket! 103 00:04:32,814 --> 00:04:34,441 Is that what that is? 104 00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:36,526 Looks like they started to make one and just gave up. 105 00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:39,196 Water, sunscreen, 106 00:04:39,196 --> 00:04:41,531 a pear in a little Styrofoam coat. 107 00:04:42,574 --> 00:04:44,367 Hold on. 108 00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:46,828 A journal. 109 00:04:46,828 --> 00:04:48,622 Are you thinking what I'm thinking? 110 00:04:48,622 --> 00:04:51,416 We ditch the others and go home? 111 00:04:51,416 --> 00:04:53,960 No, this is the weekend I start writing my book. 112 00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:56,838 I've been waiting for the perfect setting and some paper. 113 00:04:56,838 --> 00:05:00,717 Haven't you been starting that book since we met? 114 00:05:00,717 --> 00:05:01,885 Hey, that's called author-shaming, 115 00:05:01,885 --> 00:05:03,887 and it's not cool. 116 00:05:03,887 --> 00:05:05,805 I'll try to stay out of your hair, 117 00:05:05,805 --> 00:05:09,017 but I may be holed up here avoiding Tammy. 118 00:05:09,017 --> 00:05:10,352 Why? 119 00:05:10,352 --> 00:05:12,354 Why? You heard her. 120 00:05:12,354 --> 00:05:14,689 Van, van, down payment, van. 121 00:05:18,109 --> 00:05:19,861 Well, this is 122 00:05:19,861 --> 00:05:21,321 a lot of hard work. 123 00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:24,366 I should have packed my housekeeper. 124 00:05:24,366 --> 00:05:26,826 I think you're being a little paranoid about Tammy. 125 00:05:26,826 --> 00:05:28,703 If only. 126 00:05:28,703 --> 00:05:31,831 When someone shares their dreams loudly three feet away from me, 127 00:05:31,831 --> 00:05:33,959 it means they want me to pay for those dreams. 128 00:05:33,959 --> 00:05:36,711 People have been hitting me up for loans since the fifth grade. 129 00:05:36,711 --> 00:05:39,047 No one has ever paid me back. 130 00:05:39,047 --> 00:05:41,383 In fifth grade, I was showing boys my bra strap 131 00:05:41,383 --> 00:05:43,176 in exchange for their Doritos. 132 00:05:43,176 --> 00:05:45,262 But your story's painful, too. 133 00:06:05,031 --> 00:06:07,409 What's with all the female ranch hands? 134 00:06:07,409 --> 00:06:09,160 Ranch hands are supposed to be dudes. 135 00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:12,831 It's called a "dude ranch." Where are the dudes?! 136 00:06:12,831 --> 00:06:15,750 Marjorie replaced the socks I packed with these. 137 00:06:15,750 --> 00:06:18,420 "We might hike." 138 00:06:18,420 --> 00:06:20,255 The only reason to ever hike is 139 00:06:20,255 --> 00:06:22,173 if a guy says, "You want to go hiking?" 140 00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:24,718 Why am I here? 141 00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:26,261 You're just in a little slump. 142 00:06:26,261 --> 00:06:27,596 You'll get out of it. 143 00:06:27,596 --> 00:06:29,889 It's more than that. I'm invisible. 144 00:06:29,889 --> 00:06:32,142 No one's ever gonna be attracted to me again. 145 00:06:32,142 --> 00:06:34,185 At my funeral, people will say, 146 00:06:34,185 --> 00:06:37,272 "Why'd that old lawyer lady die alone? 147 00:06:37,272 --> 00:06:39,524 She was kind of cute." 148 00:06:39,524 --> 00:06:41,776 At least you're gonna be a lawyer. 149 00:06:41,776 --> 00:06:45,322 Unlike me, who's just a van-less loser. 150 00:06:45,322 --> 00:06:47,616 Guess my time's up. 151 00:06:47,616 --> 00:06:50,076 You're not a van-less loser. 152 00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:52,912 You just need a... a van. 153 00:06:52,912 --> 00:06:54,539 Hey, what do you think Jill would say 154 00:06:54,539 --> 00:06:55,999 if I asked her for a loan? 155 00:06:55,999 --> 00:06:57,500 It's all about how you ask. 156 00:06:57,500 --> 00:06:59,753 You have to make her feel like it's a win-win. 157 00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:02,505 And it really helps to throw in the big sad eyes. 158 00:07:04,716 --> 00:07:06,176 Wow. I'd give you anything. 159 00:07:06,176 --> 00:07:07,636 Okay. 160 00:07:07,636 --> 00:07:09,679 How's this? 161 00:07:11,181 --> 00:07:12,891 Good, good. 162 00:07:12,891 --> 00:07:15,518 I definitely don't feel like you're gonna murder me at all. 163 00:07:20,899 --> 00:07:22,984 Well, that's rude. 164 00:07:22,984 --> 00:07:27,197 Okay, Tammy, don't blame me when you get blisters. 165 00:07:27,197 --> 00:07:31,701 I am so tired of having to be scout leader. 166 00:07:31,701 --> 00:07:34,120 "Marjorie, will you be my sponsor?" 167 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:36,331 Then does anybody listen to me? No! 168 00:07:39,376 --> 00:07:42,170 Sorry. 169 00:07:42,170 --> 00:07:43,922 No. Honey, I'm sorry. 170 00:07:43,922 --> 00:07:46,633 Here I am venting, and look what it's doing to you. 171 00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,343 I'm giving you a little anxious tummy. 172 00:07:48,343 --> 00:07:49,594 I don't think it's you. 173 00:07:49,594 --> 00:07:51,846 I think it's the gas station hot dog. 174 00:07:51,846 --> 00:07:55,183 Or maybe the gas station mayonnaise. 175 00:07:55,183 --> 00:07:56,851 You don't have to protect me. 176 00:07:56,851 --> 00:07:58,603 I just dumped my toxicity on you. 177 00:07:58,603 --> 00:08:00,146 It's not about you! 178 00:08:03,942 --> 00:08:05,902 Hey. Hey. 179 00:08:05,902 --> 00:08:09,406 Was the drain in your shower completely clogged? 180 00:08:09,406 --> 00:08:13,034 Yeah, I basically took a bath from my ankles down. 181 00:08:13,034 --> 00:08:15,453 The joys of communal bathrooms. 182 00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:17,038 I've seen worse. 183 00:08:17,038 --> 00:08:18,206 College dorm? 184 00:08:18,206 --> 00:08:19,457 Jail. 185 00:08:19,457 --> 00:08:21,084 Just a few nights here and there, 186 00:08:21,084 --> 00:08:23,545 but you know, I dipped my toe. 187 00:08:23,545 --> 00:08:25,296 How long have you been sober? 188 00:08:25,296 --> 00:08:28,425 Coming up on seven years. Nice. 189 00:08:28,425 --> 00:08:31,344 It's weird. Every time I say it, I feel like I'm lying, 190 00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:33,680 like I must've drank at some point. 191 00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:35,265 But nope, seven years. 192 00:08:35,265 --> 00:08:36,766 I've got 12. 193 00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:39,769 I should have 15, but I went out on NyQuil-- 194 00:08:39,769 --> 00:08:42,564 the nighttime sniffling, sneezing, coughing, 195 00:08:42,564 --> 00:08:45,400 "so you can get high as a kite" medicine. 196 00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:48,862 That really should be on the bottle. Right. 197 00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:50,530 Hi, Christy! 198 00:08:57,287 --> 00:08:58,788 Yeesh. 199 00:08:58,788 --> 00:09:01,708 That thing's caught more than dreams. 200 00:09:03,168 --> 00:09:06,463 Hey. What's going on? 201 00:09:06,463 --> 00:09:08,423 Wendy has food poisoning, Marjorie's here now. 202 00:09:08,423 --> 00:09:09,841 The hot dog? 203 00:09:09,841 --> 00:09:12,343 What do you think? It cost 59 cents. 204 00:09:12,343 --> 00:09:15,472 That would've been cheap when I was a child. 205 00:09:15,472 --> 00:09:17,015 Hey, look at that. 206 00:09:17,015 --> 00:09:19,309 You did your own "Marjorie's old" joke. 207 00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:22,437 Well, since Marjorie's moved herself in, 208 00:09:22,437 --> 00:09:23,855 I'm gonna go bunk with Jill. 209 00:09:23,855 --> 00:09:26,316 Don't forget the sunset meeting in the woods! 210 00:09:26,316 --> 00:09:28,359 I'll wear the damn socks! 211 00:09:30,028 --> 00:09:31,780 I did a lap around the building. 212 00:09:31,780 --> 00:09:33,948 Even the cooks in the kitchen are all women. 213 00:09:40,455 --> 00:09:42,373 How can you lay on that bedspread? 214 00:09:42,373 --> 00:09:44,501 Have you never seen 20/20? 215 00:09:44,501 --> 00:09:48,129 I survived a youth hostel in American Samoa. 216 00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:50,423 I think I will prevail over bedding. 217 00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:54,552 I wasn't always this prissy. 218 00:09:54,552 --> 00:09:57,472 I passed out on so many public bathroom floors, 219 00:09:57,472 --> 00:09:59,766 and never even gave it a second thought. 220 00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:01,559 But when you get sober, you realize 221 00:10:01,559 --> 00:10:04,395 the world really is so icky. 222 00:10:04,395 --> 00:10:06,564 Damn it! 223 00:10:06,564 --> 00:10:07,690 What? 224 00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:09,692 Writing! It's hard! 225 00:10:12,070 --> 00:10:15,198 I can talk. How come I can't write? 226 00:10:15,198 --> 00:10:17,659 Well, what's your story about? 227 00:10:17,659 --> 00:10:21,037 I try not to discuss my work when it's still in its infancy. 228 00:10:21,037 --> 00:10:22,831 You don't have squat, do ya? 229 00:10:22,831 --> 00:10:23,915 Nope. 230 00:10:23,915 --> 00:10:26,000 Wendy yacked up her wiener, 231 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:27,627 and Marjorie's bunking in our room, 232 00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:30,421 so I am officially in play. 233 00:10:30,421 --> 00:10:32,048 Here? 234 00:10:32,048 --> 00:10:34,092 Yeah, yeah, I'll just-- I'll crash on the floor. 235 00:10:34,092 --> 00:10:36,219 No, no. You take my bed. 236 00:10:36,219 --> 00:10:37,846 No, you don't have to do that. 237 00:10:37,846 --> 00:10:40,181 It's fine. I'll bunk with Christy. 238 00:10:40,181 --> 00:10:42,100 Okay, listen, before you go, 239 00:10:42,100 --> 00:10:43,768 there was something I wanted to ask you. 240 00:10:43,768 --> 00:10:46,437 No time. Packing up. 241 00:10:46,437 --> 00:10:48,064 But just, could you look at me please? 242 00:10:52,402 --> 00:10:54,696 Are you trying to hypnotize me? 243 00:10:54,696 --> 00:10:57,323 Or move something with your mind? 244 00:10:57,323 --> 00:11:00,869 Jill Kendall, are you familiar with that great feeling you get 245 00:11:00,869 --> 00:11:02,871 when you help a friend? 246 00:11:02,871 --> 00:11:04,622 Well, you have a unique opportunity 247 00:11:04,622 --> 00:11:07,292 to get that great feeling by loaning me money for a van. 248 00:11:07,292 --> 00:11:09,210 It's a win-win in some way. 249 00:11:11,963 --> 00:11:13,631 I promise I'll pay you back. 250 00:11:13,631 --> 00:11:16,259 I'm sorry, Tammy. 251 00:11:16,259 --> 00:11:18,803 I love you, and I want you to succeed, 252 00:11:18,803 --> 00:11:22,015 but I just don't believe in lending money to friends. 253 00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:23,266 Got it. 254 00:11:27,478 --> 00:11:29,480 You were trying to do Christy eyes. 255 00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:36,195 Where the hell is this meeting?! 256 00:11:36,195 --> 00:11:38,072 I told you, we follow the arrows 257 00:11:38,072 --> 00:11:40,325 along the path until the clearing. 258 00:11:40,325 --> 00:11:42,535 We haven't seen an arrow in quite a while, 259 00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:45,330 and FYI, I think the rain washed away the path. 260 00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:47,999 Why didn't we just leave with the rest of the group? 261 00:11:47,999 --> 00:11:49,500 Because the only one in the lobby 262 00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:50,960 when the group left was me. 263 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,295 There's an arrow! 264 00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:55,757 It's pointing straight down. 265 00:11:55,757 --> 00:11:58,259 So the meeting's in hell. 266 00:11:58,259 --> 00:12:01,721 Well, good, then we're here. 267 00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:04,390 Okay, we'll go to the left. 268 00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:07,060 If we're wrong, we'll come back and go to the right. 269 00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:11,105 And this is how we've ended up, 270 00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:14,567 lost and cold. 271 00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:16,861 And it's all Marjorie's fault. 272 00:12:16,861 --> 00:12:18,905 It is Marjorie's fault. 273 00:12:20,949 --> 00:12:22,617 I love you, Adam. 274 00:12:24,410 --> 00:12:26,454 What was that? 275 00:12:38,299 --> 00:12:39,717 Wendy? 276 00:12:39,717 --> 00:12:41,344 What?! 277 00:12:41,344 --> 00:12:43,471 I brought you some soup. 278 00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:45,306 I don't want it! 279 00:12:45,306 --> 00:12:49,060 Wendy, please let me take care of you so I don't have to write. 280 00:12:49,060 --> 00:12:52,563 I have food poisoning, you moron! 281 00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:58,987 Okay, I'm just gonna leave it outside the door. 282 00:13:00,989 --> 00:13:03,533 There were no crackers, by the way. 283 00:13:12,375 --> 00:13:15,420 It's okay, Wayne. They're asleep. 284 00:13:15,420 --> 00:13:18,172 My, you get right to it, don't you? 285 00:13:20,383 --> 00:13:23,928 Thick woolen socks... but that's it. 286 00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:29,892 We will never speak of this again. Never. 287 00:13:41,404 --> 00:13:42,905 Hi. 288 00:13:42,905 --> 00:13:45,241 Hi. Without a lot of questions being asked, 289 00:13:45,241 --> 00:13:47,285 is it okay if I stay with you? 290 00:13:47,285 --> 00:13:49,412 You're here with your mom. I expected you hours ago. 291 00:13:55,376 --> 00:13:57,962 I told you, I don't want any damn food! 292 00:13:57,962 --> 00:14:01,632 What kind of idiot brings food to a person who's barfing? 293 00:14:02,759 --> 00:14:04,761 What? 294 00:14:04,761 --> 00:14:06,763 Did somebody lick your hair? 295 00:14:08,014 --> 00:14:10,016 Why are you here? 296 00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:12,935 'Cause I want to play cards and gab. Let's get to it. 297 00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:17,607 It's just I'd already started visualizing myself 298 00:14:17,607 --> 00:14:19,776 in that sweet van. 299 00:14:19,776 --> 00:14:21,235 Look, I get it. 300 00:14:21,235 --> 00:14:23,279 Jill was the fast, convenient way to get the money, 301 00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:25,114 but you don't need her. 302 00:14:25,114 --> 00:14:27,825 No, I think I do. No, you don't, because you've got you. 303 00:14:27,825 --> 00:14:29,660 You survived prison, 304 00:14:29,660 --> 00:14:31,287 you survived living with Marjorie, 305 00:14:31,287 --> 00:14:32,955 you started your own business and made it 306 00:14:32,955 --> 00:14:35,374 so successful, you need a fancy van to put it in. 307 00:14:35,374 --> 00:14:36,876 You know what you are? 308 00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:38,961 You're a badass sober woman. 309 00:14:38,961 --> 00:14:40,671 I guess. 310 00:14:40,671 --> 00:14:42,924 And think about it. If Jill lent you the money, 311 00:14:42,924 --> 00:14:45,343 you'd have a van and a not-so-silent partner. 312 00:14:45,343 --> 00:14:46,844 She does have opinions. Yeah. 313 00:14:46,844 --> 00:14:49,972 Opinions are what rich people call working. 314 00:14:49,972 --> 00:14:51,265 You're right. I can do it. 315 00:14:51,265 --> 00:14:53,476 Yes, you can, because you're a...? 316 00:14:53,476 --> 00:14:54,852 Badass sober woman. 317 00:14:54,852 --> 00:14:56,229 I can't hear you! 318 00:14:56,229 --> 00:14:57,647 I'm not gonna say it again. 319 00:14:57,647 --> 00:14:59,273 Okay, but you get it. 320 00:14:59,273 --> 00:15:00,900 I do. And you know what? 321 00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:02,735 I'm gonna shut up now so you can get back to writing. 322 00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:03,945 Forget it. 323 00:15:03,945 --> 00:15:05,655 Ooh. I give up. 324 00:15:05,655 --> 00:15:08,366 You'd think a... a-a book about teenage zombie astronauts 325 00:15:08,366 --> 00:15:10,868 would write itself, but it does not. 326 00:15:10,868 --> 00:15:13,704 You need to write about what you know. 327 00:15:15,623 --> 00:15:19,085 I suppose I could make the astronauts middle-aged. 328 00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:21,504 No, no, you need to write about your life! 329 00:15:21,504 --> 00:15:23,673 The stories you tell, the things you've gone through, 330 00:15:23,673 --> 00:15:25,675 that's your book. 331 00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:28,845 You're the baddest badass sober woman ever. 332 00:15:30,388 --> 00:15:32,849 You son of a bitch. 333 00:15:32,849 --> 00:15:34,350 I don't know whether to hug you 334 00:15:34,350 --> 00:15:36,435 or wing this pear off the side of your head. 335 00:15:36,435 --> 00:15:37,728 Do both! 336 00:15:40,273 --> 00:15:42,191 I looked for you at the meeting in the meadow, 337 00:15:42,191 --> 00:15:43,401 but I couldn't find you. 338 00:15:43,401 --> 00:15:46,195 We tried to come, but we got lost. 339 00:15:46,195 --> 00:15:48,698 My mom almost fought a goat. 340 00:15:50,074 --> 00:15:52,535 My sponsor has us on a tight schedule. 341 00:15:52,535 --> 00:15:56,247 She wants us all to be up for a sunrise meditation tomorrow, 342 00:15:56,247 --> 00:15:59,750 which really is just sleeping which I could do right here. 343 00:15:59,750 --> 00:16:02,253 Well, I was gonna go to the sunrise thing, 344 00:16:02,253 --> 00:16:03,796 but if you want to sleep in, 345 00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:06,048 that's cool with me. 346 00:16:14,432 --> 00:16:19,687 No matter what I do, I end up back in bed with my mother. 347 00:16:19,687 --> 00:16:21,230 How 'bout some pear? 348 00:16:21,230 --> 00:16:23,566 They're very good for gut health. 349 00:16:23,566 --> 00:16:25,526 You don't think I know that, Einstein? 350 00:16:25,526 --> 00:16:27,778 I went to frickin' nursing school. 351 00:16:27,778 --> 00:16:32,408 Again, what did we say about lashin' out? 352 00:16:32,408 --> 00:16:34,493 I just hate being sick. 353 00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:36,746 It reminds me of all the times I was hungover, 354 00:16:36,746 --> 00:16:39,916 getting my stomach pumped, feeling humiliated. 355 00:16:39,916 --> 00:16:44,086 I get that. I had my own suite at the ER. 356 00:16:44,086 --> 00:16:47,423 I hated people helping me then and I hate it now. 357 00:16:47,423 --> 00:16:50,092 And let's get real, you don't want to be here. 358 00:16:50,092 --> 00:16:51,260 Sure, I do. 359 00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:52,720 Please, you didn't want to here 360 00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:53,930 before I got sick. 361 00:16:53,930 --> 00:16:55,598 I know and I'm sorry, 362 00:16:55,598 --> 00:16:59,101 but I'm here now, you're here, 363 00:16:59,101 --> 00:17:01,187 there are cards... 364 00:17:03,189 --> 00:17:05,274 So what do you say we deal 'em up? 365 00:17:05,274 --> 00:17:06,943 You don't want to play. 366 00:17:06,943 --> 00:17:08,611 You're right. 367 00:17:08,611 --> 00:17:10,821 Sometimes friends do things they don't want to do 368 00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:13,157 and then they find out they're really glad they did. 369 00:17:13,157 --> 00:17:16,535 Want to make it interesting, play for a few bucks? 370 00:17:16,535 --> 00:17:18,204 Sure, sounds fun. 371 00:17:18,204 --> 00:17:20,456 Okay, Texas Hold'em, limit with a half kill, 372 00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:22,458 we'll run it twice. Okay. 373 00:17:28,339 --> 00:17:30,258 I'll talk you through it. 374 00:17:33,386 --> 00:17:35,346 All right, car's loaded up 375 00:17:35,346 --> 00:17:38,015 and Mom looks like she's about to start honkin' the horn. 376 00:17:38,015 --> 00:17:41,644 Okay. Well, I guess that's that. 377 00:17:41,644 --> 00:17:42,812 What's wrong? 378 00:17:42,812 --> 00:17:45,648 This weekend was a disaster. 379 00:17:45,648 --> 00:17:47,817 I got fragged by my own troops. 380 00:17:47,817 --> 00:17:53,614 I just wanted this retreat to be special for all of you. 381 00:17:53,614 --> 00:17:56,867 And I hear you! 382 00:17:56,867 --> 00:17:59,412 She will leave without us. 383 00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:02,873 Great. Let's go lock this energy in a car for five hours. 384 00:18:04,208 --> 00:18:05,960 Christy. 385 00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:08,587 I'll-I'll meet you out there! 386 00:18:08,587 --> 00:18:10,840 Hey, we were just leaving. 387 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:14,552 I just wanted to say again, I'm sorry I misread the signals. 388 00:18:14,552 --> 00:18:17,054 You mean me showing up in my pajamas 389 00:18:17,054 --> 00:18:18,723 at the traditional booty call hour? 390 00:18:18,723 --> 00:18:21,434 Hard to blame you for that. Yeah. 391 00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:25,980 To be honest, I was very flattered. 392 00:18:25,980 --> 00:18:29,025 It's been a while since anyone's noticed me, so... 393 00:18:29,025 --> 00:18:32,069 Are you kidding? I noticed you the minute you came in. 394 00:18:32,069 --> 00:18:36,115 God, that's my mom. 395 00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:38,534 I better go before she scares the goats. 396 00:18:38,534 --> 00:18:40,870 Well, safe travels. 397 00:18:57,053 --> 00:18:59,347 Tammy, I've been thinking about it, 398 00:18:59,347 --> 00:19:02,433 and I'd be happy to loan you the money for the van. 399 00:19:02,433 --> 00:19:04,060 Wow, thanks. 400 00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:06,479 But you know what? I decided I'm gonna get it myself. 401 00:19:06,479 --> 00:19:08,189 It might take me a little longer, 402 00:19:08,189 --> 00:19:11,150 but I'm gonna do it, 'cause I'm a badass sober woman. 403 00:19:11,150 --> 00:19:13,319 We all are. 404 00:19:13,319 --> 00:19:17,198 Ooh, that truck stop has ceviche! 405 00:19:17,198 --> 00:19:19,408 A hot dog took you down but you're gonna roll the dice 406 00:19:19,408 --> 00:19:21,160 on road fish? 407 00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:24,080 Well, if I get sick, I will let you all take care of me. 408 00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:26,082 Hey, any of you have a spare journal? 409 00:19:26,082 --> 00:19:27,750 I filled mine up. 410 00:19:27,750 --> 00:19:32,671 Take this one. Ignore the angry scratchings on page one. 411 00:19:32,671 --> 00:19:34,965 Read them the part you showed me. 412 00:19:34,965 --> 00:19:36,342 I don't know. 413 00:19:36,342 --> 00:19:38,636 I want to hear. 414 00:19:38,636 --> 00:19:41,347 Okay, be gentle. 415 00:19:41,347 --> 00:19:45,434 "I guess my only memory before I went into foster care 416 00:19:45,434 --> 00:19:49,271 "was the dollhouse my mom gave me on my fourth birthday. 417 00:19:49,271 --> 00:19:52,858 "Of course, we couldn't afford any furniture for the inside, 418 00:19:52,858 --> 00:19:55,194 "so we made everything out of paper. 419 00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:59,532 "Little paper beds, chairs, even a little paper rug. 420 00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:03,119 "I had no idea it was gonna take me a lifetime to get back 421 00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:05,955 to a house where I felt that safe and loved." 422 00:20:05,955 --> 00:20:08,707 It's just a rough draft, but you get the idea. 423 00:20:08,707 --> 00:20:10,376 That's so great. I love it. 424 00:20:10,376 --> 00:20:13,421 That was beautiful. 425 00:20:15,464 --> 00:20:18,926 I kissed a girl! 426 00:20:18,926 --> 00:20:21,220 Couldn't let me have it, could ya?