1
00:00:06,199 --> 00:00:08,700
Oh, man, those Christmas cookies smell
great.

2
00:00:09,040 --> 00:00:11,220
Here, Ernie, I saved this for you.

3
00:00:15,940 --> 00:00:17,060
Look at him go.

4
00:00:17,860 --> 00:00:20,600
This explains why he never got a second
date with that girl that wore chocolate

5
00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:21,600
lip gloss.

6
00:00:22,540 --> 00:00:23,540
Well, good night.

7
00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:28,660
Ernie, Ernie, slow down. You're going to
chip a tooth.

8
00:00:33,260 --> 00:00:35,720
Don't do it, Angie. Your hand smells
like batter. You'll lose an arm.

9
00:00:37,360 --> 00:00:44,300
Look, it's a Cuban Santa

10
00:00:44,300 --> 00:00:48,480
Claus. He doesn't have a sleigh or
reindeer. He's just got a raft pulled by

11
00:00:48,480 --> 00:00:49,480
relatives.

12
00:00:50,380 --> 00:00:51,760
I don't care what you say.

13
00:00:52,260 --> 00:00:53,280
I'm in a great mood.

14
00:00:53,860 --> 00:00:55,860
I just got off the phone with your
sister.

15
00:00:56,160 --> 00:01:00,480
For the first time, the entire Palmetto
family will be in Miami for Christmas.

16
00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:01,920
We're having a reunion.

17
00:01:02,560 --> 00:01:06,420
This is so great. The whole family
hasn't been together in years.

18
00:01:07,440 --> 00:01:10,320
Angie, I can't take your whole family
talking down to me. I thought we were

19
00:01:10,320 --> 00:01:11,320
going to see your Aunt Claudia.

20
00:01:11,780 --> 00:01:14,740
At least when she insults me, I can just
turn down her oxygen tank. She falls

21
00:01:14,740 --> 00:01:15,740
asleep.

22
00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:19,260
You turned down my aunt's oxygen tank?

23
00:01:19,560 --> 00:01:22,140
Of course not. What kind of person do
you think I am? I just pinched the hose

24
00:01:22,140 --> 00:01:23,140
little bit.

25
00:01:24,640 --> 00:01:28,120
What are you worried about, George?
You're a big success, man. Yeah, George.

26
00:01:28,120 --> 00:01:29,120
don't know what you're worried about.

27
00:01:29,760 --> 00:01:36,040
There'll be six doctors there, eight
lawyers, two judges, a state senator,

28
00:01:36,040 --> 00:01:37,360
one factory worker.

29
00:01:38,920 --> 00:01:42,340
Maybe you can tell them what it's like
to eat lunch from a truck.

30
00:01:45,140 --> 00:01:48,180
Maybe you can tell them what it's like
to lie about your age on your Internet

31
00:01:48,180 --> 00:01:49,180
dating ad.

32
00:01:49,380 --> 00:01:50,760
That's right. I went online.

33
00:01:51,260 --> 00:01:52,920
I'm Juicy Maria 818.

34
00:01:55,470 --> 00:01:56,650
I don't know what you're talking about.

35
00:01:57,610 --> 00:02:00,190
Really? You get stood up for coffee last
Saturday?

36
00:02:00,790 --> 00:02:01,790
Damn it!

37
00:02:03,830 --> 00:02:05,210
What about Jessica 1960?

38
00:02:06,590 --> 00:02:09,009
I don't know. Show up at the park, take
your chances.

39
00:02:10,930 --> 00:02:12,470
Fine. I can take a joke.

40
00:02:12,690 --> 00:02:16,450
By the way, you're sitting next to
Catherine Ross at Christmas dinner.

41
00:02:16,750 --> 00:02:21,230
She fell in the shower and she can only
grunt now, so you two should hit it off.

42
00:02:23,210 --> 00:02:25,390
Well, at least your grunts will make
more sense than your English.

43
00:02:26,750 --> 00:02:28,390
Would you two stop it?

44
00:02:28,630 --> 00:02:31,050
George, you're going to have a good time
in Miami.

45
00:02:31,710 --> 00:02:33,210
Daddy, come help me finish the tree.

46
00:02:36,610 --> 00:02:38,390
Man, this Christmas is going to be hell.

47
00:02:38,790 --> 00:02:41,770
All those snobby relatives are going to
treat me like crap. So what if I didn't

48
00:02:41,770 --> 00:02:42,609
go to college?

49
00:02:42,610 --> 00:02:45,790
So what if I worked in a factory? Does
that make me less important than some

50
00:02:45,790 --> 00:02:50,470
senator or a judge or a doctor? Hey,
we're all equal in God's eyes.

51
00:02:51,410 --> 00:02:52,410
Orale, Dalai Lama!

52
00:02:55,809 --> 00:02:56,809
You know what?

53
00:02:58,430 --> 00:02:59,430
I'm not going.

54
00:02:59,990 --> 00:03:01,150
But it's Christmas.

55
00:03:01,370 --> 00:03:02,710
You gotta be with your family.

56
00:03:03,110 --> 00:03:04,470
They'll have a better time without me.

57
00:03:04,770 --> 00:03:07,370
Angie will be with her relatives, and
everybody will be happy to see their

58
00:03:08,110 --> 00:03:10,670
There's no way that Angie's gonna be
cool with this. I know.

59
00:03:11,290 --> 00:03:14,390
That's why I'm gonna tell her that the
Powers brothers are making me work on

60
00:03:14,390 --> 00:03:15,390
Christmas Eve.

61
00:03:15,990 --> 00:03:17,970
You're gonna lie to your wife on
Christmas?

62
00:03:21,710 --> 00:03:23,690
was built on lies to make people feel
better.

63
00:03:24,450 --> 00:03:25,550
What are you talking about?

64
00:03:26,030 --> 00:03:26,909
All right.

65
00:03:26,910 --> 00:03:28,950
It's probably time we had this
conversation. Sit down.

66
00:03:30,290 --> 00:03:34,850
You know how every year you give me your
gift first? Mm -hmm. And then seconds

67
00:03:34,850 --> 00:03:37,030
later, I end up giving you the exact
same gift?

68
00:03:37,270 --> 00:03:38,310
Well, that reminds me.

69
00:03:40,150 --> 00:03:41,390
I got your Christmas gift.

70
00:03:42,390 --> 00:03:43,390
What's that?

71
00:03:43,450 --> 00:03:45,410
Two free rounds of golf at Ocean Pine.

72
00:03:46,030 --> 00:03:47,110
Was that your place? Yeah.

73
00:03:47,510 --> 00:03:48,510
This is great.

74
00:03:49,430 --> 00:03:50,430
Ow.

75
00:03:50,860 --> 00:03:51,860
What'd you get me?

76
00:03:55,120 --> 00:03:56,200
You know, man, this is weird.

77
00:03:56,780 --> 00:03:59,440
You know, this is the same as last year,
like there's some strange connection

78
00:03:59,440 --> 00:04:00,980
between us. That's the way you hang out.

79
00:04:01,280 --> 00:04:08,140
I got you a free

80
00:04:08,140 --> 00:04:09,600
round of golf at Ocean Pines!

81
00:04:09,880 --> 00:04:13,940
How come you didn't get the two -for
-one deal?

82
00:04:14,920 --> 00:04:17,200
I use discounts on games that cheapens
it.

83
00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:23,020
Oh, God, dude, I feel terrible, man.

84
00:04:23,280 --> 00:04:24,460
Here, you should have this back.

85
00:04:25,120 --> 00:04:26,940
All right, well, as long as you learned
a lesson. Yeah.

86
00:04:31,340 --> 00:04:35,780
Damn it, Jack, this isn't fair.

87
00:04:36,440 --> 00:04:38,120
How can you make me work on Christmas
Eve?

88
00:04:38,620 --> 00:04:41,660
I'm going to Miami with my family, and
there's nothing that you can say?

89
00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:44,320
Oh, it's you. Where the hell is your
mom?

90
00:04:46,600 --> 00:04:47,600
She's coming.

91
00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:57,070
Is your... you keep empty no um it's hot
in miami all my clothes are linen but

92
00:04:57,070 --> 00:05:01,550
it really feels like there's nothing in
here you're curious about everything and

93
00:05:01,550 --> 00:05:08,410
you gotta take a test huh get in the car
damn it jack this isn't fair

94
00:05:08,410 --> 00:05:12,590
how can you make me work on christmas
eve i am going to miami with my family

95
00:05:12,590 --> 00:05:17,730
there's nothing that you can say where
the hell is your mom she's coming

96
00:05:21,040 --> 00:05:22,040
Anything in here?

97
00:05:22,260 --> 00:05:23,260
Are you crazy?

98
00:05:23,500 --> 00:05:27,000
Carmen, now when security asks me if
anybody had on my bag, I have to say

99
00:05:27,320 --> 00:05:29,780
You put the whole trip in jeopardy. Get
in the car.

100
00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:34,120
These kids, you can't leave nothing
without touching everything.

101
00:05:36,560 --> 00:05:39,660
Damage check, this isn't fair. How can
you make me work on Christmas Eve? I am

102
00:05:39,660 --> 00:05:42,860
going to Miami with my family, and
there's nothing that you can say that

103
00:05:42,860 --> 00:05:43,860
stop me.

104
00:05:44,700 --> 00:05:45,700
Except that.

105
00:05:47,320 --> 00:05:49,220
I didn't know people's jobs were in
danger.

106
00:05:49,840 --> 00:05:50,840
Well, this is unexpected.

107
00:05:51,060 --> 00:05:52,060
All right.

108
00:05:52,160 --> 00:05:53,180
I'll be there. All right!

109
00:05:54,140 --> 00:05:55,140
I'll be there.

110
00:05:58,180 --> 00:05:59,180
What's going on?

111
00:06:00,940 --> 00:06:02,040
You didn't get it from that?

112
00:06:05,500 --> 00:06:06,500
What?

113
00:06:06,660 --> 00:06:08,580
I can't go to Miami, Ang. I gotta work.

114
00:06:09,400 --> 00:06:10,880
On Christmas Eve?

115
00:06:11,540 --> 00:06:13,420
No. No way. I'm calling Jack.

116
00:06:14,300 --> 00:06:17,100
He said that there was a big screw -up
with the Boeing order, and if we don't

117
00:06:17,100 --> 00:06:19,280
get this stuff out, we're going to lose
the contract and people are going to get

118
00:06:19,280 --> 00:06:20,280
laid off.

119
00:06:21,460 --> 00:06:22,460
Doc?

120
00:06:22,500 --> 00:06:24,140
I know, but what am I supposed to do?

121
00:06:25,900 --> 00:06:29,140
I guess I have to call Aunt Claudia and
tell her that we can't come to Miami. If

122
00:06:29,140 --> 00:06:32,160
you have to work, then we're going to
stay here with you. No, Angie, look.

123
00:06:33,840 --> 00:06:35,540
I don't want you to miss your family
reunion.

124
00:06:36,140 --> 00:06:39,140
Just because my Christmas is going to be
ruined doesn't mean that yours should

125
00:06:39,140 --> 00:06:40,140
be.

126
00:06:44,630 --> 00:06:49,770
George Lopez, sometimes you surprise me.
Just when I was about to have a talk

127
00:06:49,770 --> 00:06:52,890
with you about being selfish, you do
something like this.

128
00:06:57,630 --> 00:07:00,430
You know, this is the holidays. We
shouldn't be critical of each other.

129
00:07:01,470 --> 00:07:03,970
Well, talk about how judgmental you are
after the new year.

130
00:07:06,150 --> 00:07:08,570
Unless you can work on it by then, but
I'm not holding my breath.

131
00:07:10,750 --> 00:07:13,770
Are you sure you're going to be okay? I
mean...

132
00:07:14,040 --> 00:07:17,600
Spending Christmas alone? You won't even
have your mom because she's gambling in

133
00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:19,620
Reno. Angie, I'm going to be fine. Look
at it this way.

134
00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:25,160
You seeing your family on Christmas is
my gift to you. Huh? Let's open it

135
00:07:25,160 --> 00:07:26,160
together.

136
00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:31,840
This is a really sweet thing you're
doing.

137
00:07:34,660 --> 00:07:37,460
Jeff, know the whole time you're gone,
I'll be thinking of you, baby, okay?

138
00:07:38,060 --> 00:07:39,080
I miss you already.

139
00:07:57,550 --> 00:08:00,110
doing with your golf club i'm throwing a
tantrum because i can't be with my

140
00:08:00,110 --> 00:08:06,670
family on christmas why should i have to
suffer why me it'll be okay dad

141
00:08:06,670 --> 00:08:11,330
thanks i never thought of it like that
you better go now max because i feel the

142
00:08:11,330 --> 00:08:15,610
darkness coming back okay be a good boy
all right okay bye -bye now

143
00:08:50,510 --> 00:08:53,990
Then I played a little golf, went to a
movie, smoked a cigar, and organized all

144
00:08:53,990 --> 00:08:57,030
the tools in my garage. Asked me where
my hammer is. Where? By the front door

145
00:08:57,030 --> 00:08:58,270
right there with the little outline,
black.

146
00:09:00,230 --> 00:09:01,330
Dan, you got a lot done.

147
00:09:01,930 --> 00:09:04,670
Finish it up. You don't have to go home,
but you can't stay here.

148
00:09:06,570 --> 00:09:08,070
It's only six. Why are they closing?

149
00:09:08,350 --> 00:09:09,350
Dude, it's Christmas Eve.

150
00:09:09,750 --> 00:09:12,750
Everybody's got to go home to their
families. Not us. We're going out. Two

151
00:09:12,750 --> 00:09:14,230
bachelors, just like back in the day.

152
00:09:15,270 --> 00:09:18,810
Actually, I can't. I got to go to
Bakersfield. We're going to spend

153
00:09:18,810 --> 00:09:19,810
with my Tia Lencha.

154
00:09:21,130 --> 00:09:25,070
Well, Lencha, wasn't she that teacher
that got fired for having an affair with

155
00:09:25,070 --> 00:09:26,070
14 -year -old student?

156
00:09:26,230 --> 00:09:29,670
Yeah, but it's not that weird. You know,
he's tall for his age, and she really

157
00:09:29,670 --> 00:09:31,170
doesn't look like she's in her 50s.

158
00:09:34,190 --> 00:09:36,470
I bet they wouldn't have got caught if
she hadn't have gone to the prom.

159
00:09:38,210 --> 00:09:41,230
You gonna be all right here by yourself?

160
00:09:41,710 --> 00:09:44,750
Me? Are you kidding? You know my mom
never celebrated Christmas.

161
00:09:45,250 --> 00:09:46,430
I'm used to spending it alone.

162
00:09:47,030 --> 00:09:48,030
I kind of like it now.

163
00:09:48,719 --> 00:09:50,100
Okay, then. I'm going. All right.

164
00:09:53,140 --> 00:09:57,140
You sure you're going to be okay?

165
00:09:57,360 --> 00:09:58,680
Yeah, man, I'm going to be fine.

166
00:09:58,920 --> 00:09:59,980
Get out of here. All right.

167
00:10:00,220 --> 00:10:04,240
Hey, Merry Christmas. Okay, Merry
Christmas. Hey, call me all you want

168
00:10:04,240 --> 00:10:05,240
got a lot of holiday minutes.

169
00:10:06,660 --> 00:10:07,660
Seriously,

170
00:10:08,800 --> 00:10:09,800
man, we're closed.

171
00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:11,900
Okay, I'm out of here.

172
00:10:12,720 --> 00:10:15,580
Hey, you know, if you're not doing
anything, man, you want to go catch a

173
00:10:15,960 --> 00:10:18,700
movie. It's Christmas Eve. I'm spending
it with my family.

174
00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:20,480
Don't you have anyone?

175
00:10:21,080 --> 00:10:24,340
Yeah, but I lied and said that I had to
work so I wouldn't have to spend time

176
00:10:24,340 --> 00:10:27,700
with my wife's family. They look down on
me. I wonder why they look down on a

177
00:10:27,700 --> 00:10:29,520
liar who spends Christmas Eve in a bar.

178
00:10:32,120 --> 00:10:32,959
All right.

179
00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:36,900
The truth is I'm a Christmas angel. Send
down here to see if you'd be kind to a

180
00:10:36,900 --> 00:10:38,400
stranger and guess what? You failed.

181
00:10:40,200 --> 00:10:42,720
So good luck driving home on the icy
roads tonight.

182
00:10:43,260 --> 00:10:44,260
This is L .A.

183
00:10:44,980 --> 00:10:50,640
Yeah, that's right. This is L .A., the
city of angels, where miracles can

184
00:10:50,640 --> 00:10:52,300
for those who believe.

185
00:10:52,580 --> 00:10:53,580
Watch out.

186
00:10:56,820 --> 00:10:58,940
Want me to call you, Ted? Yeah, that
would be nice.

187
00:11:25,550 --> 00:11:27,030
What are you doing here? You're supposed
to be gambling.

188
00:11:27,410 --> 00:11:29,050
Oh, I got kicked out of the casino.

189
00:11:30,130 --> 00:11:33,090
Apparently, Tony Orlando doesn't like to
have panties thrown at him.

190
00:11:34,470 --> 00:11:35,970
You went to a Tony Orlando concert?

191
00:11:36,610 --> 00:11:37,970
No, he was playing blackjack.

192
00:11:39,930 --> 00:11:41,110
Hey, what are you doing home?

193
00:11:41,770 --> 00:11:42,770
I didn't go to Miami.

194
00:11:43,430 --> 00:11:46,250
Hey, look, now that you're here, you
don't have to steal my tequila. Why

195
00:11:46,250 --> 00:11:47,250
we just hang out?

196
00:11:47,870 --> 00:11:52,150
Oh, wow, George, that sounds like a lot
of fun, but I gotta get to work.

197
00:11:53,310 --> 00:11:54,310
I'm your boss.

198
00:11:54,460 --> 00:11:56,220
I know the factory's closed. You're
lying to me.

199
00:11:56,660 --> 00:11:59,360
Do I have to make up another one or are
you going to let me off the hook?

200
00:12:00,540 --> 00:12:03,780
Why don't we just spend the holidays
together and have a good time for once?

201
00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:05,640
Yeah, you know what?

202
00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:07,000
You're right, George.

203
00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:10,760
I'm just going to go get some smokes out
of the car and we'll finally have that

204
00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:11,960
Christmas you wanted.

205
00:12:14,980 --> 00:12:16,620
I'm going to hear your car peeling out,
aren't I?

206
00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:18,400
George.

207
00:12:18,480 --> 00:12:19,580
Please, it's Christmas.

208
00:12:20,720 --> 00:12:24,180
I'm just going to coast down the hill
and pop the clutch. You won't hear a

209
00:12:24,180 --> 00:12:25,180
thing.

210
00:12:32,140 --> 00:12:35,120
Merry Christmas, Mommy.

211
00:13:04,319 --> 00:13:06,540
Angie, what are you doing? We talked
about this.

212
00:13:07,520 --> 00:13:08,520
Carmen's sleeping.

213
00:13:09,820 --> 00:13:14,560
Before you get mad, the tree was half
-priced. I told you we don't have money

214
00:13:14,560 --> 00:13:15,940
waste on a Christmas tree.

215
00:13:16,260 --> 00:13:19,140
I'm sorry. This is what normal people do
on Christmas.

216
00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:24,100
My mom used to have a tree in every room
and decorate each one with a different

217
00:13:24,100 --> 00:13:27,080
theme. We were poor, so we had our own
Christmas traditions.

218
00:13:27,580 --> 00:13:28,960
Every Christmas, see, but...

219
00:13:29,200 --> 00:13:31,340
Sneak into the living room, hang my sock
on the fireplace.

220
00:13:32,980 --> 00:13:35,220
Then my shirt and my pants, because we
didn't have a dryer.

221
00:13:37,540 --> 00:13:38,740
Honey, I know.

222
00:13:38,940 --> 00:13:43,660
I know you had it rough. But it's time
to start our own tradition.

223
00:13:44,100 --> 00:13:47,260
It's your daughter's first Christmas. We
should make it special.

224
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:49,760
She's not going to remember any of this,
Angie.

225
00:13:50,100 --> 00:13:52,340
She's three months old. She hasn't even
smiled yet.

226
00:13:52,640 --> 00:13:54,200
What, so Christmas means nothing to you?

227
00:13:54,580 --> 00:13:58,100
No. It means double time at the factory.
That's why I signed on for another

228
00:13:58,100 --> 00:13:59,100
shift.

229
00:14:00,100 --> 00:14:02,260
You're working on Christmas Eve?

230
00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:36,680
Angie. You should want to be with your
family.

231
00:14:37,220 --> 00:14:38,220
Angie, look.

232
00:14:38,680 --> 00:14:40,840
What? Angie, Carmen's smiling.

233
00:14:43,080 --> 00:14:45,140
Her first smile.

234
00:14:46,680 --> 00:14:47,720
She likes the light.

235
00:14:49,300 --> 00:14:50,300
That or it's gas.

236
00:14:52,340 --> 00:14:53,340
No, it's the light.

237
00:14:55,500 --> 00:14:58,320
I'm happy we were able to see her first
smile together.

238
00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:01,180
You know what? I'm going to call the
factory and get out of my shift.

239
00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:04,580
I want to be with my family on Christmas
Eve.

240
00:15:13,060 --> 00:15:14,060
I'm okay.

241
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:15,240
I can handle this.

242
00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:17,580
I like being alone.

243
00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:41,940
We can all sing one together. I'll be
like that.

244
00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:44,000
Jingle bell, jingle bell.

245
00:15:45,260 --> 00:15:49,380
We got other houses to get to. Look,
I'll make hot chocolate and get a candy

246
00:15:49,380 --> 00:15:51,000
cane. We can all stir it. It'll be fun.

247
00:15:52,460 --> 00:15:53,620
Kids, get in the van.

248
00:15:53,840 --> 00:15:54,840
This is not a drill.

249
00:15:58,820 --> 00:15:59,820
Where are you guys going?

250
00:16:13,710 --> 00:16:14,710
Not alone, I got TV.

251
00:16:15,370 --> 00:16:17,910
TV's all I've ever had and TV's all I've
ever needed.

252
00:16:18,170 --> 00:16:19,650
It always cheers me up.

253
00:16:20,450 --> 00:16:22,610
Do holidays make you depressed?

254
00:16:23,050 --> 00:16:24,050
Shut up.

255
00:16:34,390 --> 00:16:37,690
One final touch and I'll have a friend
for Christmas.

256
00:16:44,330 --> 00:16:46,510
Perfect timing. My scotch was getting
warm.

257
00:16:47,790 --> 00:16:48,850
Why are you crying?

258
00:16:49,570 --> 00:16:52,310
I made a big, stupid mistake this
morning.

259
00:16:57,810 --> 00:16:58,830
Come on, George.

260
00:16:59,270 --> 00:17:02,090
The whole family is going to help Santa
deliver toys.

261
00:17:02,830 --> 00:17:03,830
Sorry,

262
00:17:04,050 --> 00:17:07,670
but I have a lot of work to do. You
know, put the tools away in the toy

263
00:17:07,690 --> 00:17:08,810
clean out the reindeer barn.

264
00:17:09,829 --> 00:17:12,630
I don't know what Santa's feeding
Blitzen, but I know how he got his name.

265
00:17:14,670 --> 00:17:16,950
Buckle up, my pointed -eared friend.

266
00:17:17,450 --> 00:17:18,650
It's showtime.

267
00:17:19,710 --> 00:17:20,750
Bye, honey.

268
00:17:21,210 --> 00:17:22,210
Bye, Dad.

269
00:17:22,329 --> 00:17:28,470
Bye. I lied because I thought it'd be
fun to smoke cigars and hang out by

270
00:17:28,470 --> 00:17:29,470
myself.

271
00:17:29,990 --> 00:17:31,230
But now I'm lonely.

272
00:17:32,210 --> 00:17:33,390
Will you be my friend?

273
00:17:33,670 --> 00:17:37,690
No, I have a date with a big jolly guy
in a red suit who likes me to bounce on

274
00:17:37,690 --> 00:17:38,690
his lap.

275
00:17:38,870 --> 00:17:40,670
But Santa's out delivering presents.

276
00:17:41,010 --> 00:17:42,730
Who said anything about Santa?

277
00:17:47,210 --> 00:17:53,990
All alone on Christmas Eve, why'd I let
my family leave?

278
00:17:54,950 --> 00:18:01,470
Tis a season without glee, woe is, woe
is, woe is me.

279
00:18:20,560 --> 00:18:22,300
I need to be on the first flight to
Miami.

280
00:18:23,220 --> 00:18:26,520
I know it's Christmas Eve. Look, I don't
care what it costs, okay?

281
00:18:27,400 --> 00:18:28,880
First class, full price, whatever.

282
00:18:29,860 --> 00:18:31,260
I just need to see my family.

283
00:18:32,620 --> 00:18:33,620
How much?

284
00:18:37,260 --> 00:18:39,580
What if I told you that my mom died and
I'm going to her funeral?

285
00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:42,120
It's still that much?

286
00:18:44,520 --> 00:18:48,380
Actually, I just need to send my mom's
Great Dane to the funeral.

287
00:18:49,470 --> 00:18:51,110
You don't look in those crates, do you?

288
00:18:58,490 --> 00:18:59,530
Here's my death certificate.

289
00:19:00,750 --> 00:19:05,410
I have to say, I never thought I would
see my son try to get a cheaper airline

290
00:19:05,410 --> 00:19:07,310
ticket with a funeral scam.

291
00:19:09,830 --> 00:19:11,030
I'm proud of you, George.

292
00:19:13,070 --> 00:19:14,290
Where did you get this anyway?

293
00:19:14,710 --> 00:19:18,650
Oh. I got it when I went to Graceland. I
just whited out Elvis' name.

294
00:19:21,810 --> 00:19:23,070
Well, thank you very much, Mama.

295
00:19:27,430 --> 00:19:28,430
Hey, honey.

296
00:19:29,430 --> 00:19:31,350
Angie! Merry Christmas!

297
00:19:31,730 --> 00:19:33,910
Oh, my God, I don't believe it. You guys
are home.

298
00:19:34,230 --> 00:19:35,370
I can't believe it.

299
00:19:35,590 --> 00:19:39,110
I wanted to call you from the airport,
but the kids wanted to surprise you.

300
00:19:39,270 --> 00:19:41,510
Look, and I was going to surprise you
guys, too. I was going to fly to Miami

301
00:19:41,510 --> 00:19:42,850
because I missed you guys so much.

302
00:19:43,260 --> 00:19:46,100
And then you left, and the penguin went
to sleep with Santa, and the carolers

303
00:19:46,100 --> 00:19:47,620
came over, but I wasn't wearing any
pants.

304
00:19:48,800 --> 00:19:51,780
Oh, my God. This is Grandma's death
certificate.

305
00:19:52,880 --> 00:19:55,200
Dad killed Grandma, and now he's drunk
and celebrating.

306
00:19:56,000 --> 00:19:58,100
No, I was going to use it to get a
cheaper flight.

307
00:19:58,800 --> 00:20:02,100
Look, I realize that I never want to
spend Christmas without my family again.

308
00:20:03,120 --> 00:20:07,080
The beautiful thing is that you all felt
the same way and flew all the way back

309
00:20:07,080 --> 00:20:08,080
to be with me.

310
00:20:09,340 --> 00:20:13,480
Or... the storm in Chicago and our
flight to Miami was canceled. Max!

311
00:20:14,560 --> 00:20:16,360
It doesn't matter. This is meant to be.

312
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:18,500
This is our Christmas miracle.

313
00:20:21,380 --> 00:20:23,760
The Lopez family is back together.

314
00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:26,760
Anna, we can stop the storm in Chicago.

315
00:20:27,100 --> 00:20:28,100
Over.

316
00:20:31,060 --> 00:20:32,360
Anna, cover blown.

317
00:20:32,620 --> 00:20:33,579
Code red.

318
00:20:33,580 --> 00:20:34,740
Get me out!