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EERIE MUSIC PLAYS

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00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:11,640
Go on, take it!

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It's the first test.

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It's the first test.

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It'll be hilarious. Can't wait
to see her face.

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This is taking ages. Hurry up.
Write faster!

7
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She's coming!

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<font color="white">Who is responsible for</font>
this sacrilege?!

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I tell you now, whoever did this,

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00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:42,160
no secret is hidden
from the Holy Father.

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You know who you are. And the wrath
of the Lord will be upon you

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and His punishment will be
harsh and righteous,

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<font color="white">and commensurate with the mortal</font>
sin of blasphemy!

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GIRLS CHAT AND LAUGH

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You've some weird and deviant ways,
Rosalind Booth.

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Natalie, have you anything you wish
to say to me about this afternoon?

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No, Sister Cunegonde.

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WIND BLOWS

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<font color="white">CREAKING</font>

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SCREAMING

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GIRLS CRY

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Sister!

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SHE SCREAMS

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We'll see if 24 hours
of isolation can tame this

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rebellious spirit
of yours, Rosalind.

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In this room you will read,
reflect on your sins,

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<font color="white">and learn penitence</font>
through the power of prayer.

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And you will truly see God,
and learn to love Him through the

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blessed Saint Barnabas, and repent
the error of your heathen ways.

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So are you going to
tell us what happened?

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Did you actually see God?
<font color="lime">Come on, tell us.</font>

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Course I didn't "see God."

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What do you think? Absolutely
nothing happened in there.

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Nothing at all.

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MUSIC: "Danse Macabre"
by Camille Saint-Saens

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'Yes, and although today one simply
thinks of oneself as this

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<font color="white">'jobbing writer-director-presenter-</font>

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'political-theorist-cum-social
anthropologist, having trained

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'initially, of course, in the areas
of medicine and bio-chemistry,

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'I still find these areas
utterly fascinate me.

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'There's a lady in Sweden,
<font color="white">for example, who for 11 years</font>

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'now has been sending me videos
of her husband's colonoscopies.

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'And while it's true that to
a specialist in rectal polyps

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'his abdomen is positively stacked
with treasures, what's curious

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'is her passion for meticulously
<font color="white">documenting their progress.</font>

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'Like some form of anal archivist
recording his posterior

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'for posterity, as it were.'

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Well, there we must leave it.

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As ever, Franklin Tartikoff,

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it's been illuminating,

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entertaining, and an absolute...

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MEDIA FILE BEEPS

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<font color="white">PHONE RINGS</font>

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Ah, Nigel!

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Yes, some of these dates
they've sent for the book tour,

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I don't think are going to work,
unfortunately.

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July 15th, I'll be up to
my eyes in The Winslow Boy.

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That's Terence Rattigan, for any
<font color="white">tabloid reporters listening in.</font>

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And the third and fourth of August,

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I'll still be colour grading
Robin Cook.

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And then, I'm afraid, the last week
of November's not good for me,

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as I'll be dead. Any chance they
could bring that one forward at all?

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00:08:01,520 --> 00:08:03,000
<font color="white">DOORBELL RINGS</font>

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00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:06,440
Well, no. That prognosis,
I'm told, is amazingly accurate,

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00:08:06,440 --> 00:08:09,680
based on this new software that
can sample the echocardiogram

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and then calculate the exact
rate of ventricular atrophy.

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As a tool for assessing life
expectancy in terminal heart

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<font color="white">disease, it's one of the most</font>
exciting new clinical

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developments I can remember.

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Peter!

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Franklin.

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Morning. Come on up,
the coffee's on. How are you?

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Are you well?

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Fine thanks, yes. And how's Ros?

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Glad to get that funeral
<font color="yellow">out of the way this morning?</font>

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Oh, yes. An old school friend,
apparently.

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She's been obsessing about it
for days. I don't know why.

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Grace Elizabeth Elstow
left this world too early,

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but it was, at least, a world
she had come to terms with.

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<font color="cyan">She understood the temporary</font>
nature of existence,

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that man is no more meaningful
than a mountain of molecules,

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beautifully, but pointlessly
composited for one brief life span,

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before reverting,
without consequence,

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to an infinity of dust.

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<font color="yellow">Not quite the Pope's Easter message,</font>

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but...I suppose it's what
she would have wanted.

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Dear Beth. You were their
one success story.

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Funny how we all spin off
in different directions.

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That's Grace and Kate, then, now.
Both gone.

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<font color="yellow">Just the two of us left.</font>

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You...got my text?

92
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And?

93
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You went back. What did you see?

94
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Too much.

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I hoped...

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Maybe I hoped it had all gone away.

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All I know is, the sooner they
pull that wretched place down,
the better.

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<font color="yellow">But they'll still be with us, Ros.</font>

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The ghosts will never leave us

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00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:03,560
as long as we go
on running from the past.

101
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We were just children. We didn't
deserve that! I'm sorry, Beth.

102
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I can't see the point.

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It's 50 years now.
For God's sake,

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<font color="cyan">can't we please just</font>
let it go and move on!

105
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Ah yes, I see what you're
saying about the arrhythmia.

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It's like a form of
systolic syncopation, almost.

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Art Tatum in the atrium.

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PHONE RINGS

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Ah! That'll be Fariba.

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<font color="white">Said she'd call the minute</font>
she landed. Do you mind?

111
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No, no, we're almost done.

112
00:10:36,240 --> 00:10:39,520
Sweetheart!
How was life in the jungle?

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Yes, going to be clearing a
space soon for that BAFTA
documentary award!

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I tell you, 108 days with the
<font color="lime">most primitive people on Earth -</font>

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00:10:47,640 --> 00:10:50,920
109 if you count
the baggage staff at Jakarta -

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just so opens your eyes

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to life,

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survival, existence.

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Well, listen, I can't wait
to see the footage.

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00:11:00,560 --> 00:11:03,000
No, I can imagine.

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00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:06,240
Yeah, I only
<font color="white">went to Bhubaneswar.</font>

122
00:11:06,240 --> 00:11:09,200
Pottering around
the Buddhist shrine...

123
00:11:09,200 --> 00:11:11,200
Peter. You're just off?

124
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:14,640
Yes. I've made one slight adjustment
to your husband's medication.

125
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If I could leave it with you?

126
00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:17,480
Yes. Of course.

127
00:11:21,160 --> 00:11:23,720
And I'll be in touch
<font color="yellow">again next week.</font>

128
00:11:23,720 --> 00:11:26,320
Yes. Right. Bye then, Peter.

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FRANKLIN: The student bar would be
empty by 10 o'clock...

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CAR ENGINE STARTS

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00:12:01,080 --> 00:12:02,640
Interesting.

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00:12:02,640 --> 00:12:07,000
Yes, but not something you'd
have much use for. It's a god.

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00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:08,800
Tarua-Ran. Oh, yes?

134
00:12:08,800 --> 00:12:14,160
<font color="lime">Which means, roughly translated,</font>
"What cannot be explained."

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00:12:14,160 --> 00:12:17,440
It's like they're living on a whole
different spiritual plane to us.

136
00:12:17,440 --> 00:12:20,320
Gosh. We think we know
all the answers.

137
00:12:20,320 --> 00:12:23,280
We don't even know
the questions.

138
00:12:23,280 --> 00:12:26,440
And how's Brad?
<font color="lime">You been keeping him warm for me?</font>

139
00:12:26,440 --> 00:12:30,440
Yes. Yes, we see him from
time to time, don't we? Mm-hmm.

140
00:12:30,440 --> 00:12:31,560
Is he all right?

141
00:12:31,560 --> 00:12:34,040
What do you think?
16 weeks on his own?

142
00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:36,600
The poor man'll be pining
for you desperately.

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00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:38,320
Oh!

144
00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:44,560
Whoa!

145
00:12:46,880 --> 00:12:49,000
<font color="white">THEY LAUGH</font>

146
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:50,880
I think that's what
DH Lawrence would call

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00:12:50,880 --> 00:12:53,160
"the hastening gravitation
of spirit towards spirit

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00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:54,600
"and body towards body."

149
00:12:55,720 --> 00:12:57,320
Give me that again?

150
00:12:57,320 --> 00:12:58,520
Whoa!

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00:12:58,520 --> 00:12:59,560
HE LAUGHS

152
00:13:00,800 --> 00:13:03,800
No, I meant the bit about
<font color="white">DH Lawrence.</font>

153
00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:05,240
You know, we need to look lively,

154
00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:07,000
before the owners of
this place catch us.

155
00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:08,080
When are they due back?

156
00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:09,400
The end of February.

157
00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:14,520
So they fly south for the winter

158
00:13:14,520 --> 00:13:17,360
and leave you to mind the shop.
Got to be a cushy number.

159
00:13:17,360 --> 00:13:18,640
<font color="yellow">And the rest.</font>

160
00:13:18,640 --> 00:13:21,400
There's all the maintenance work,
sorting out the animal feed.

161
00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:23,720
And picking up strange women
at petrol stations.

162
00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:25,560
I should have known you
worked on a farm

163
00:13:25,560 --> 00:13:28,560
when you had to sit on that little
stool to put your hands up my shirt.

164
00:13:28,560 --> 00:13:30,360
<font color="white">Nice part of the world, though.</font>

165
00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:34,520
What's that place?
Like a stately home or something?

166
00:13:34,520 --> 00:13:37,440
Oh, Waxwood Hall. Yeah,
used to be an old convent school.

167
00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:40,880
There was some weird story
back in the '60s.

168
00:13:40,880 --> 00:13:43,320
These girls who all
woke up with, like,

169
00:13:43,320 --> 00:13:45,440
<font color="yellow">strange red rings on their head.</font>

170
00:13:45,440 --> 00:13:48,360
Think one of them was actually
found dead the next morning.

171
00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:50,680
You know what it's like,
local superstitions.

172
00:13:50,680 --> 00:13:53,160
There's been talk around
this place ever since.

173
00:13:53,160 --> 00:13:55,440
"Dark forces" at work
in that building

174
00:13:55,440 --> 00:13:57,440
<font color="yellow">you really don't want</font>
to meddle with...

175
00:13:57,440 --> 00:14:00,360
PHONE RINGS

176
00:14:00,360 --> 00:14:02,960
Oh, course, she's back
this week, I forgot.

177
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:08,160
Girl I was sort of seeing,
till she, erm...

178
00:14:08,160 --> 00:14:10,280
Hey! How the hell are you?

179
00:14:10,280 --> 00:14:14,080
Oh, just the usual.
Slopping about the farm.

180
00:14:14,080 --> 00:14:16,240
<font color="yellow">Sorting out the livestock.</font>

181
00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:18,800
But listen, we should get
together for a catch up.

182
00:14:18,800 --> 00:14:20,640
Yeah, when's good for you?

183
00:14:20,640 --> 00:14:23,320
I don't know, Brad.
when's good for you?

184
00:14:23,320 --> 00:14:25,360
Not just this minute, I'm guessing.

185
00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:44,240
MUSIC STOPS

186
00:14:44,240 --> 00:14:45,480
JONATHAN MUMBLES

187
00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:47,440
APPLAUSE

188
00:14:52,520 --> 00:14:55,880
<font color="lime">Oh, I know! And he was so looking</font>
forward to catching up
with you today.

189
00:14:55,880 --> 00:14:59,560
But them's the breaks, I'm afraid,
when you're running
a global advertising agency.

190
00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:01,520
Cos you and my dad go back 30 years,

191
00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:03,880
directing those
SDP party politicals.

192
00:15:03,880 --> 00:15:06,440
<font color="white">Oh, yes, Roy Jenkins.</font>
"With not a little rancour."

193
00:15:06,440 --> 00:15:08,840
I think we went to 16 takes.

194
00:15:08,840 --> 00:15:11,520
Oh, I never got a chance to
introduce you all properly,

195
00:15:11,520 --> 00:15:13,360
did I, to my husband, Jonathan?

196
00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:15,960
Don't think you know Jack -
producer extraordinaire.

197
00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:18,480
You still based in Euston,
<font color="lime">have I remembered that right?</font>

198
00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:20,840
And Davina and Rosalind.

199
00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:23,000
And Franklin Tartikoff,
you obviously know.

200
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:26,080
Though to me you'll always be
the Right Reverend Leslie Clitoris.

201
00:15:26,080 --> 00:15:28,480
I mean, priceless. Some of the
stuff you got away with,

202
00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:30,240
<font color="yellow">those early satire shows on radio.</font>

203
00:15:30,240 --> 00:15:31,720
You remember the mad Catholic bishop

204
00:15:31,720 --> 00:15:34,080
who tied women's legs
together in a reef knot?

205
00:15:34,080 --> 00:15:38,920
Gosh, yes. Leslie Clitoris. The BBC
had no idea what we were saying.

206
00:15:38,920 --> 00:15:41,040
They thought he was the chap
who wrote The Saint.

207
00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:42,360
THEY LAUGH

208
00:15:42,360 --> 00:15:45,000
<font color="cyan">So, anyway.</font>
This is all news to us, Polly?

209
00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:46,920
What was it, a whirlwind courtship?

210
00:15:46,920 --> 00:15:48,920
More like an emergency airlift!

211
00:15:48,920 --> 00:15:52,280
Poor man was living in a windmill,
weren't you, when I first met him.

212
00:15:52,280 --> 00:15:54,840
Thinking up conjuring
tricks for a living.

213
00:15:54,840 --> 00:15:57,520
So you know, bit of a reboot
<font color="lime">required there, but...</font>

214
00:15:57,520 --> 00:16:01,640
Good for us all periodically,
I think. To metamorphose, move on.

215
00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:03,000
I was born a man.

216
00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:05,520
Exactly. Oh! Mustn't
forget, by the way,

217
00:16:05,520 --> 00:16:07,640
it's Jack and Davina's
anniversary today,

218
00:16:07,640 --> 00:16:10,520
so many congratulations
to you both!

219
00:16:10,520 --> 00:16:13,880
<font color="yellow">To the lucky husband and his</font>
lovely wife! Many more to come.

220
00:16:15,080 --> 00:16:18,320
So where's he taking you after this,
somewhere exciting?

221
00:16:21,960 --> 00:16:23,280
What?

222
00:16:24,760 --> 00:16:28,920
No, it's just all this "he",
and "husband and wife."

223
00:16:28,920 --> 00:16:30,720
I'm very sorry.

224
00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:33,000
No, no, darling,
<font color="cyan">I'm sure he understands.</font>

225
00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:34,240
A few years ago, Jonathan,

226
00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:37,360
I had some identity issues
with my gender.

227
00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:39,360
We discussed it, we resolved it.

228
00:16:39,360 --> 00:16:43,240
I was Geoffrey Hyde, I'm now
Jacqueline. It's done.

229
00:16:43,240 --> 00:16:45,600
We've moved on. We're very happy.

230
00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:49,160
So great, when people can work
<font color="lime">these things out.</font>

231
00:16:49,160 --> 00:16:51,280
So, sorry, what are you saying?
That you...

232
00:16:51,280 --> 00:16:53,720
Made what we both felt
was the mature decision.

233
00:16:53,720 --> 00:16:57,000
And in case you're wondering,
I got to keep all my male genitalia.

234
00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:58,320
Oh, right.

235
00:16:58,320 --> 00:17:00,520
I keep it in a jar in
my production office.

236
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:01,760
<font color="cyan">You know what it's like.</font>

237
00:17:01,760 --> 00:17:03,760
Pairs of shoes you
don't wear any more,

238
00:17:03,760 --> 00:17:06,200
you still can't bear to throw away.

239
00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:09,520
And the name, I suppose -
Jacqueline - sort of appropriate

240
00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:11,640
with your identity issues?

241
00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:15,880
Jacqueline Hyde?

242
00:17:15,880 --> 00:17:17,640
How do you mean, exactly?

243
00:17:18,640 --> 00:17:20,320
<font color="white">Actually, talking of satire,</font>

244
00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:23,440
did you have any luck with that
demo tape? I meant to ask.

245
00:17:23,440 --> 00:17:26,560
Some quite extraordinary
performances...
Let's go and say hi...

246
00:17:26,560 --> 00:17:29,400
Can I say something
embarrassing, Jonathan?

247
00:17:29,400 --> 00:17:32,280
I'm such an admirer
<font color="cyan">of all your cognitive work.</font>

248
00:17:32,280 --> 00:17:35,280
It takes a pretty
stubborn mind sometimes

249
00:17:35,280 --> 00:17:37,080
to fly the flag for common sense

250
00:17:37,080 --> 00:17:39,720
when everyone else around you
seems to believe in fairies.

251
00:17:39,720 --> 00:17:41,360
That's... I realise, obviously,

252
00:17:41,360 --> 00:17:43,360
that's a closed chapter
in your life now,

253
00:17:43,360 --> 00:17:45,560
<font color="cyan">but just so you know...</font>

254
00:17:45,560 --> 00:17:46,920
you have a fan.

255
00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:59,880
MACHINE BEEPS AND CLICKS

256
00:18:17,120 --> 00:18:21,240
I'll be away then now.
And see you later.

257
00:18:21,240 --> 00:18:24,520
Yes. Enjoy your "bridge night."

258
00:18:35,480 --> 00:18:38,920
CHANTING ON TV

259
00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:43,560
Hi, how are you?

260
00:18:46,720 --> 00:18:51,440
Indeed. In some ways
the perfect night for it.

261
00:18:51,440 --> 00:18:53,640
<font color="white">THUNDER CRASHES</font>

262
00:18:53,640 --> 00:18:55,240
We both know he knows.

263
00:18:55,240 --> 00:18:58,560
Is there anything on this God-awful
Earth he doesn't know?

264
00:18:58,560 --> 00:19:02,360
It's just that, to say that to me,
to even allude...

265
00:19:02,360 --> 00:19:05,840
It's the first time ever he's tried
to rattle me with subtext.

266
00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:10,600
This time next year,
<font color="yellow">things'll be different.</font>

267
00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:12,240
Yes, knowing him,

268
00:19:12,240 --> 00:19:15,600
he'll suddenly develop a
miracle cure in his coffee break.

269
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:21,760
I have to go.

270
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:48,200
WOMAN SOBS

271
00:20:02,440 --> 00:20:05,400
THUNDER CRASHES

272
00:20:08,120 --> 00:20:11,880
WOMAN SOBS

273
00:20:20,880 --> 00:20:22,480
DOOR RATTLES

274
00:20:23,920 --> 00:20:27,640
Fariba? You in there,
<font color="cyan">darling? What's happening?</font>

275
00:20:27,640 --> 00:20:29,520
Fariba, please open the door!

276
00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:31,560
ROSALIND BANGS ON DOOR

277
00:20:42,080 --> 00:20:44,040
ROSALIND GASPS

278
00:20:47,040 --> 00:20:48,880
Oh, no! Fariba!

279
00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:52,120
Oh, God, oh, God! What's happened?!

280
00:20:52,120 --> 00:20:54,880
Talk to me, will you?!

281
00:20:54,880 --> 00:20:57,440
Fariba! Fariba!

282
00:20:57,440 --> 00:20:59,360
Open the door!

283
00:20:59,360 --> 00:21:01,160
BANGS ON DOOR

284
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:02,720
<font color="cyan">Talk to me, will you?</font>

285
00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:05,160
Fariba?

286
00:21:05,160 --> 00:21:08,080
Fariba, can you hear me?

287
00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:09,720
Fariba!

288
00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:28,120
Yes, you've got to
come over here now!

289
00:21:46,080 --> 00:21:48,720
Oh, God, oh, God.

290
00:21:48,720 --> 00:21:51,240
Fariba, can you hear me?

291
00:21:51,240 --> 00:21:53,440
BANGING ON DOOR

292
00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:18,320
Shh...

293
00:22:18,320 --> 00:22:20,640
I called the police.
<font color="cyan">I called the ambulance.</font>

294
00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:21,840
Well done, well done.

295
00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:29,280
In God's name...

296
00:22:30,440 --> 00:22:32,520
FARIBA GROANS

297
00:22:32,520 --> 00:22:35,240
My darling, are you all right?
Can you talk?

298
00:22:35,240 --> 00:22:37,760
Talk to me, what happened here?

299
00:22:37,760 --> 00:22:40,480
This is insane.

300
00:22:40,480 --> 00:22:42,000
You're making this up!

301
00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:44,720
What happened?
<font color="cyan">Why can't you tell us?</font>

302
00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:47,080
Because I... I don't know.

303
00:22:47,080 --> 00:22:50,440
I came up here...
I found him like that...

304
00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:54,360
I heard somebody coming upstairs,
and I locked the door.

305
00:22:54,360 --> 00:22:57,120
Whoever did that, I didn't know,
they might still be in the house,

306
00:22:57,120 --> 00:22:59,400
outside there, with a gun
<font color="lime">to your head...</font>

307
00:22:59,400 --> 00:23:02,920
I... I couldn't think straight!

308
00:23:02,920 --> 00:23:05,680
But you never moved from
that door the whole time.

309
00:23:06,800 --> 00:23:10,360
I mean, for God's sake,
he was in here, you both saw him!

310
00:23:10,360 --> 00:23:13,160
This is just surreal, isn't it?

311
00:23:14,360 --> 00:23:16,040
Where the hell did he go?

312
00:23:16,040 --> 00:23:18,760
THUNDER CRASHES

313
00:23:20,080 --> 00:23:23,200
<font color="white">PEOPLE CHATTER</font>

314
00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:24,760
Can you please move...

315
00:23:33,240 --> 00:23:36,480
Sorry, I thought he might
have a small window, but

316
00:23:36,480 --> 00:23:39,920
I'm afraid we're looking at
back-to-back appointments
all morning.

317
00:23:39,920 --> 00:23:43,240
Then he's got lunch with his
co-directors at Claridge's at one,

318
00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:46,080
<font color="cyan">and from three to five he'll</font>
be at his club in town, so...

319
00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:47,480
Erm, yes!

320
00:23:47,480 --> 00:23:49,000
Can I stop you there?

321
00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:51,160
I think we've got our wires crossed
here, haven't we?

322
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:54,640
It's just, I googled the name
and this company came up, but

323
00:23:54,640 --> 00:23:57,440
obviously got the wrong Jonathan
<font color="white">Creek here entirely, haven't I?</font>

324
00:23:57,440 --> 00:24:00,640
So, very sorry to
have troubled you. Bye.

325
00:24:42,160 --> 00:24:45,760
Oh! Oh, God! I'm sorry,
I'm sorry! Sorry.

326
00:24:47,280 --> 00:24:48,800
What are you like?

327
00:24:50,160 --> 00:24:52,240
It wasn't deliberate,
I swear to you, honestly.

328
00:24:52,240 --> 00:24:54,640
INTERCOM BUZZES

329
00:24:54,640 --> 00:24:56,840
<font color="cyan">'Sorry, Mr Creek, just to warn you.</font>

330
00:24:56,840 --> 00:24:59,680
'There was a rather strange woman
hanging about earlier on.

331
00:24:59,680 --> 00:25:02,160
'I got security to escort
her off the premises,

332
00:25:02,160 --> 00:25:05,280
'but just in case she manages
to worm her way back in...

333
00:25:05,280 --> 00:25:08,200
'She looked like the sort
that doesn't give up.'

334
00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:11,040
<font color="yellow">I'll bear that in mind.</font>
Thank you, Angelika.

335
00:25:11,040 --> 00:25:13,600
Said she thought you might
have a small window.

336
00:25:13,600 --> 00:25:15,080
Has she ever been in this room?

337
00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:16,920
Look, if all you've come here
to do is smirk

338
00:25:16,920 --> 00:25:18,840
at the fact that I've
finally managed to

339
00:25:18,840 --> 00:25:21,960
<font color="yellow">turn my life around, progress</font>
my career, do something

340
00:25:21,960 --> 00:25:26,240
a bit more grown-up and responsible
and creatively challenging.

341
00:25:26,240 --> 00:25:30,320
Only I've got a very important
presentation to Weetabix in five
minutes, so if you don't mind...

342
00:25:30,320 --> 00:25:31,560
All right, get out.

343
00:25:31,560 --> 00:25:33,760
<font color="white">I'm sorry, I'm sorry - no!</font>
I'm sorry.

344
00:25:33,760 --> 00:25:37,440
Look, three years. People can change,
it's none of my business.

345
00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:39,160
So look, I'll keep this short, OK?

346
00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:41,240
Cos this won't be on
your radar yet, probably.

347
00:25:41,240 --> 00:25:44,280
It's only just breaking, but...

348
00:25:44,280 --> 00:25:46,440
A dead man in a room, right,

349
00:25:46,440 --> 00:25:49,480
<font color="white">seen and photographed by witnesses,</font>

350
00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:51,600
completely evaporates into thin air.

351
00:25:51,600 --> 00:25:54,400
Walls, floor, ceiling all rock solid,

352
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:57,360
no way he could have got out through
the window, or through the door,

353
00:25:57,360 --> 00:26:00,880
which was being watched the whole
time, and yet when they went in...

354
00:26:00,880 --> 00:26:03,440
I mean, it is just mind-blowing.

355
00:26:04,960 --> 00:26:07,800
<font color="yellow">There'll be an explanation.</font>

356
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:09,720
It'll all be
very weird and wonderful.

357
00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:12,880
Once you've fathomed it, everyone
will be deeply underwhelmed,

358
00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:15,080
and you'll wonder why you bothered,
so.

359
00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:17,560
Ordinarily, agreed. But this one
is so bulletproof,

360
00:26:17,560 --> 00:26:18,880
<font color="white">from what they're saying,</font>

361
00:26:18,880 --> 00:26:21,360
it's like nothing
you've ever come across.

362
00:26:21,360 --> 00:26:23,680
There's a lot of mad talk
in this village already

363
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:26,040
about supernatural forces.

364
00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:29,120
And now with this
Franklin Tartikoff character

365
00:26:29,120 --> 00:26:32,360
just apparently turning into dust,
<font color="white">like some kind of vampire...</font>

366
00:26:32,360 --> 00:26:33,960
Franklin Tartikoff?

367
00:26:37,520 --> 00:26:40,480
Sorry, I didn't realise
you were...in a meeting.

368
00:26:41,960 --> 00:26:43,600
You know we're...

369
00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:46,520
Yes. This was just... Absolutely.

370
00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:49,280
Best of luck with that, then.

371
00:26:49,280 --> 00:26:50,880
Sounds like you'll need it.

372
00:27:01,440 --> 00:27:03,920
What's the latest news?
<font color="cyan">What's going on?</font>

373
00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:06,960
Please step back. Please step back.
There's nothing to see here.

374
00:27:06,960 --> 00:27:09,840
Move all back. This is private
property, ladies and gentlemen,

375
00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:11,280
please move back.

376
00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:33,920
Ow!

377
00:28:04,960 --> 00:28:07,880
FARIBA CRIES

378
00:28:07,880 --> 00:28:10,240
KNOCK ON DOOR

379
00:28:11,240 --> 00:28:13,800
<font color="lime">We found this in the kitchen,</font>
Mrs Tartikoff.

380
00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:16,160
Could you enlighten us at all?

381
00:28:16,160 --> 00:28:18,440
My husband's bat detector.

382
00:28:18,440 --> 00:28:21,640
He'd been tracking this soprano
pipistrelle for the past week,

383
00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:24,080
appeared to have come
out of hibernation.

384
00:28:24,080 --> 00:28:28,000
Oh, in fact, that's something I
<font color="cyan">should really have warned you about.</font>

385
00:28:42,960 --> 00:28:44,920
JOEY GASPS

386
00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:51,360
Copy that, Sergeant.

387
00:28:51,360 --> 00:28:54,720
I can report the bat net
has just been safely located.

388
00:28:56,640 --> 00:28:59,600
Joey Ross. Joey Ross...

389
00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:03,600
Bear with me
just a few seconds.

390
00:29:03,600 --> 00:29:05,320
I could switch to voice recognition,

391
00:29:05,320 --> 00:29:08,360
<font color="lime">but calling up a Wikipedia file</font>
is not without risks.

392
00:29:08,360 --> 00:29:12,160
Now, according to this, you run
a website which catalogues

393
00:29:12,160 --> 00:29:15,200
and explains real life
paranormal experiences,

394
00:29:15,200 --> 00:29:17,640
in occasional collaboration with...

395
00:29:17,640 --> 00:29:19,440
Well, well, well!

396
00:29:19,440 --> 00:29:21,960
A name that immediately
<font color="lime">sprang to mind, of course,</font>

397
00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:24,280
when this little puzzle
first presented itself.

398
00:29:24,280 --> 00:29:26,440
He and I had the pleasure of
working together once,

399
00:29:26,440 --> 00:29:28,880
on the curious matter
of the limping man... Oh!

400
00:29:28,880 --> 00:29:31,880
..some years before a sniper's
<font color="lime">bullet put me in this contraption.</font>

401
00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:34,280
So you wouldn't be...

402
00:29:34,280 --> 00:29:35,720
Gideon Pryke?

403
00:29:35,720 --> 00:29:37,480
They tried to retire me, of course,

404
00:29:37,480 --> 00:29:39,440
but I still have
the use of one finger,

405
00:29:39,440 --> 00:29:41,080
which was enough to argue my case.

406
00:29:41,080 --> 00:29:43,760
And, please God, the world's
moved on since Raymond Burr...

407
00:29:43,760 --> 00:29:46,160
<font color="lime">Sergeant Cudlipp!</font>

408
00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:48,480
The heel of a man's shoe,
size 11 I'd imagine,

409
00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:50,560
directly below the victim's study.

410
00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:54,080
Get me a cast, as quick as you like,
and roll out Operation Dandini.

411
00:29:54,080 --> 00:29:56,800
Yeah, I think that's where
DC O'Brien would have been, sir,

412
00:29:56,800 --> 00:29:58,240
when he was checking out
<font color="white">the windows.</font>

413
00:29:58,240 --> 00:30:00,320
Except DC O'Brien's tread
is quite dissimilar,

414
00:30:00,320 --> 00:30:03,080
and this chap appears to have
been standing hard against the wall

415
00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:04,440
with his nose in the bricks.

416
00:30:04,440 --> 00:30:07,280
Unusual behaviour during a
thunderstorm, what do you think?

417
00:30:08,440 --> 00:30:09,720
No problem, Guv.

418
00:30:12,240 --> 00:30:13,440
<font color="lime">Assigned to me just this week</font>

419
00:30:13,440 --> 00:30:16,240
by someone upstairs who knows
bugger all about bugger all.

420
00:30:16,240 --> 00:30:18,760
But you've got some form
in this line of inquiry.

421
00:30:18,760 --> 00:30:21,640
What say we go and pool
our early observations?

422
00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:32,600
'Franklin Tartikoff, whose dead body
was discovered late last night

423
00:30:32,600 --> 00:30:35,320
<font color="cyan">'by his adopted daughter</font>
Fariba Tartikoff,

424
00:30:35,320 --> 00:30:39,360
'only to vanish, minutes later,
right under everyone's nose.

425
00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:42,000
'But then, hopes of a solution
rose this morning with

426
00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:45,240
'the arrival of the formidable
investigator Gideon Pryke,

427
00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:49,080
'who famously suffered near-fatal
<font color="cyan">injuries five years ago</font>

428
00:30:49,080 --> 00:30:53,000
'while rescuing a child's puppy
during the Chinese Embassy siege

429
00:30:53,000 --> 00:30:55,640
'and whose unique ability...'

430
00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:58,800
Do you know, I'm not sure now
about these blonde highlights.

431
00:30:58,800 --> 00:31:01,360
Think next time
I might go more Titian.

432
00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:03,520
What does that involve,
<font color="yellow">formaldehyde?</font>

433
00:31:03,520 --> 00:31:07,000
Hmm? What were you
watching just then?

434
00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:12,360
Look, the poor man's dead,
there's nothing we can do about it.

435
00:31:12,360 --> 00:31:14,600
Where's that little knob?

436
00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:16,080
I'm sorry? You know!

437
00:31:16,080 --> 00:31:19,440
The one we have to keep turning down
when your brain gets overheated.

438
00:31:19,440 --> 00:31:21,600
<font color="lime">Look, whatever it</font>
is that's happened...

439
00:31:21,600 --> 00:31:23,160
PHONE RINGS

440
00:31:23,160 --> 00:31:26,880
Probably your managing director
and father-in-law. Excuse me.

441
00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:32,720
PHONE RINGS

442
00:31:32,720 --> 00:31:34,520
Jonathan Creek.

443
00:31:35,640 --> 00:31:38,200
Oh, hi. Hi.

444
00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:40,400
Yeah, of course, who hasn't?

445
00:31:40,400 --> 00:31:42,160
I don't know what to say.

446
00:31:42,160 --> 00:31:43,960
<font color="cyan">'I shouldn't have rung you,</font>
it's just...'

447
00:31:43,960 --> 00:31:47,080
You're the only one
I can say this to.

448
00:31:47,080 --> 00:31:49,720
Jonathan...I'm frightened.

449
00:31:50,800 --> 00:31:52,640
'Frightened that...'

450
00:31:52,640 --> 00:31:58,040
every certainty, everything I've
ever believed, is about to vanish...

451
00:31:58,040 --> 00:32:01,120
like my husband, and never return.

452
00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:11,240
<font color="white">And this was taken...</font>

453
00:32:11,240 --> 00:32:12,640
According to the statements,

454
00:32:12,640 --> 00:32:15,400
about 13 minutes before
they broke down the door.

455
00:32:17,680 --> 00:32:20,360
So I can take it we're not
looking at any tomfoolery with

456
00:32:20,360 --> 00:32:23,440
floorboards, or hidden panels, or...

457
00:32:23,440 --> 00:32:26,160
So his body was just here.

458
00:32:26,160 --> 00:32:29,240
<font color="white">We don't know whether he'd been shot,</font>
or stabbed or what.

459
00:32:29,240 --> 00:32:30,880
Let alone why.

460
00:32:30,880 --> 00:32:34,640
His daughter was just here
- who then fainted.

461
00:32:36,440 --> 00:32:38,920
And this'll be, what,

462
00:32:38,920 --> 00:32:40,680
like an airing cupboard?

463
00:32:42,680 --> 00:32:44,520
Aargh! Red hot!

464
00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:49,200
Dunno. He wasn't really dead,

465
00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:51,880
<font color="white">and he got in the tank</font>
and boiled away?

466
00:32:51,880 --> 00:32:54,160
Oh, God, this is
freaking me out already.

467
00:32:54,160 --> 00:32:55,600
Where the hell do you even start?

468
00:32:55,600 --> 00:32:57,360
You disappoint me.

469
00:32:57,360 --> 00:33:01,280
I would have thought the pictures on
the stairs were rather suggestive?

470
00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:04,000
Well, there go our two dinner
<font color="cyan">parties this weekend.</font>

471
00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:06,840
He needs me over there, apparently,
for this top-table powwow.

472
00:33:06,840 --> 00:33:09,680
Sounds like they're only projecting
single-digit growth now

473
00:33:09,680 --> 00:33:10,960
across the affiliates.

474
00:33:10,960 --> 00:33:13,720
So that's me off to JFK,
crack of dawn.

475
00:33:13,720 --> 00:33:16,400
Better get myself sorted.
<font color="cyan">I'm so sorry, angel.</font>

476
00:33:16,400 --> 00:33:17,720
Oh, well.

477
00:33:47,880 --> 00:33:49,200
SHE CLICKS HER FINGERS

478
00:33:52,000 --> 00:33:54,160
The hand in his pocket!

479
00:33:54,160 --> 00:33:56,080
Which is a bit of a
weird one for starters

480
00:33:56,080 --> 00:33:59,440
but according to those photos out
there, he had that habit, apparently,

481
00:33:59,440 --> 00:34:03,320
of always leaving his thumb outside,
<font color="white">just like hooked over the edge.</font>

482
00:34:03,320 --> 00:34:06,600
Except here it isn't.

483
00:34:06,600 --> 00:34:08,240
The whole hand's inside.

484
00:34:08,240 --> 00:34:10,440
From which we might
fairly conclude...

485
00:34:10,440 --> 00:34:13,240
That he didn't put
his hand in his pocket.

486
00:34:13,240 --> 00:34:16,600
Someone else put it there
deliberately, after he was dead.

487
00:34:17,720 --> 00:34:19,080
<font color="white">But for what reason?</font>

488
00:34:19,080 --> 00:34:20,840
Well, when we know that,

489
00:34:20,840 --> 00:34:23,080
I suspect we'll have the key
to the whole mystery.

490
00:34:23,080 --> 00:34:25,640
In the meantime, I draw your
attention to a disc that was

491
00:34:25,640 --> 00:34:27,440
sitting there in his DVD drive.

492
00:34:27,440 --> 00:34:30,320
Fatally corrupted, unfortunately,
so the contents are unknown.

493
00:34:30,320 --> 00:34:32,600
<font color="white">"GP". Perhaps they knew</font>
you were coming.

494
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:36,360
Could be a dead end, of course.

495
00:34:36,360 --> 00:34:38,640
But you might be intrigued
to hear what the SOCO boys

496
00:34:38,640 --> 00:34:40,360
found on his computer keyboard.

497
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:41,680
What?

498
00:34:41,680 --> 00:34:44,960
Nothing. Which, I think you'll
agree, is decidedly fishy.

499
00:34:44,960 --> 00:34:47,960
<font color="lime">There wasn't a single</font>
fingerprint on one of the keys.

500
00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:50,440
Constable Atkins.

501
00:34:50,440 --> 00:34:53,040
I want a complete shakedown of
every notebook, BlackBerry,

502
00:34:53,040 --> 00:34:54,680
tablet and diary in the house.

503
00:34:54,680 --> 00:34:58,120
You're looking for a name
with the initials GP.

504
00:34:58,120 --> 00:35:00,200
An inside job? Possibly.

505
00:35:00,200 --> 00:35:02,800
<font color="lime">We'll give that daughter of his</font>
the benefit of the doubt for now,

506
00:35:02,800 --> 00:35:04,080
but only for now.

507
00:35:04,080 --> 00:35:05,800
Rest assured, someone around here

508
00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:07,920
knows a lot more
than they're saying

509
00:35:07,920 --> 00:35:10,360
and by jingo, I'll have it
out of them before we're done.

510
00:35:10,360 --> 00:35:12,160
Until tomorrow?

511
00:35:16,600 --> 00:35:18,640
<font color="yellow">OK? </font><font color="lime">OK, good.</font>

512
00:35:20,240 --> 00:35:24,200
Oh. It's going to be a
miserable weekend for you,

513
00:35:24,200 --> 00:35:27,680
rattling around here on
your own like a spare part.

514
00:35:27,680 --> 00:35:29,400
What are you going do with yourself?

515
00:35:29,400 --> 00:35:30,680
God only knows.

516
00:35:35,800 --> 00:35:38,680
Just come back in one piece, OK? OK.

517
00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:43,840
<font color="yellow">And love to your dad!</font>

518
00:36:12,640 --> 00:36:16,640
Listen, Fariba.
That day in the field with Brad...

519
00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:18,600
Is of no consequence to us now.

520
00:36:20,120 --> 00:36:22,440
That's not who we are.

521
00:36:22,440 --> 00:36:24,000
It's not what we are.

522
00:36:26,120 --> 00:36:29,120
Something inside us

523
00:36:29,120 --> 00:36:32,240
deep and infinite
that can't be measured.

524
00:36:32,240 --> 00:36:36,760
That was never created
<font color="lime">and can never die.</font>

525
00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:38,440
Do you buy into that, Joey?

526
00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:43,520
We talk about belief, religion.

527
00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:45,560
I see only wisdom.

528
00:36:45,560 --> 00:36:48,960
The wisdom to accept
what we can never know.

529
00:36:48,960 --> 00:36:54,440
This is where you part company
slightly, I gather, from your, erm...

530
00:37:01,480 --> 00:37:04,840
I was three years old when
<font color="lime">they rescued me from the floods.</font>

531
00:37:05,840 --> 00:37:09,080
Mayabunder in the Andaman Islands.

532
00:37:09,080 --> 00:37:11,880
He was out there doing
a series about Marco Polo.

533
00:37:14,440 --> 00:37:17,960
Growing up in the West, I don't
know... Did I lose something?

534
00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:24,520
Maybe that's why I went back,
to find out.

535
00:37:24,520 --> 00:37:28,120
Transubstantiation
<font color="lime">of the body into spirit.</font>

536
00:37:29,520 --> 00:37:32,720
Can a human being
just float away into thin...

537
00:37:32,720 --> 00:37:34,800
If you don't mind me
giving it the once over.

538
00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:36,160
PRYKE: Shall we say half an hour?

539
00:37:36,160 --> 00:37:38,160
Anything else you need,
just give me a shout.

540
00:37:38,160 --> 00:37:40,880
<font color="cyan">Otherwise, all yours then, Mr Creek.</font>

541
00:37:40,880 --> 00:37:43,160
It's good to have you
back in the saddle.

542
00:37:45,760 --> 00:37:47,560
Well, this is poor.

543
00:37:47,560 --> 00:37:52,840
But then, I call in Don Draper to
solve a crime, what do I expect?

544
00:37:52,840 --> 00:37:55,360
So what changed your mind then,
in the end?

545
00:37:55,360 --> 00:37:58,880
No, it's just...you look at
<font color="yellow">this picture by the police</font>

546
00:37:58,880 --> 00:38:03,240
when they got here against the one
she took out there on the landing...

547
00:38:03,240 --> 00:38:07,240
Why can't I shake off the
feeling there's something missing?

548
00:38:07,240 --> 00:38:09,560
Err, yes. A dead body?

549
00:38:09,560 --> 00:38:11,440
Sort of why we're all here.

550
00:38:13,520 --> 00:38:16,160
No, it's too subliminal still.
<font color="yellow">Just won't come.</font>

551
00:38:17,760 --> 00:38:21,880
So you noticed the hand in the
pocket with no thumb sticking out?

552
00:38:21,880 --> 00:38:24,720
Yes. And that shoe print
under the window

553
00:38:24,720 --> 00:38:26,080
that was flush against the wall?

554
00:38:26,080 --> 00:38:27,520
Yes.

555
00:38:27,520 --> 00:38:30,680
And the small piece of squashed
<font color="yellow">Blu-tack lying over there on the</font>
floor?

556
00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:32,200
Y...

557
00:38:32,200 --> 00:38:34,280
What's that got to do with anything?

558
00:38:35,880 --> 00:38:38,640
Nothing, possibly.

559
00:38:38,640 --> 00:38:42,520
Or it could be the most significant
detail in the whole case.

560
00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:45,680
I suppose the "GP"
on that corrupted disc

561
00:38:45,680 --> 00:38:48,520
<font color="yellow">is unlikely to be our doctor friend.</font>

562
00:38:48,520 --> 00:38:51,600
Even if he is sleeping
with the wife.

563
00:38:51,600 --> 00:38:53,640
Where the hell did you get that from?

564
00:38:54,680 --> 00:38:55,920
She told me.

565
00:38:55,920 --> 00:38:57,600
Why go on pretending?

566
00:38:58,720 --> 00:39:00,200
Franklin and I...

567
00:39:01,440 --> 00:39:04,360
It was never that sort of marriage.

568
00:39:04,360 --> 00:39:07,160
We both knew that
<font color="cyan">almost from the start.</font>

569
00:39:07,160 --> 00:39:10,520
He was just simply the most
astonishing, provocative

570
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:13,080
and intellectually gifted man
I'd ever known.

571
00:39:13,080 --> 00:39:15,840
As hard as it was,
I'd prepared myself to lose him.

572
00:39:15,840 --> 00:39:17,360
But not like this.

573
00:39:19,080 --> 00:39:23,080
One other point, Mrs Tartikoff,
<font color="lime">you may be able to help us with.</font>

574
00:39:23,080 --> 00:39:25,960
A text my sergeant
found on your phone,

575
00:39:25,960 --> 00:39:27,720
dated January 3rd.

576
00:39:27,720 --> 00:39:32,240
"Remember 1968,
the year of the Circles."

577
00:39:32,240 --> 00:39:34,560
From someone called Beth.

578
00:39:34,560 --> 00:39:36,520
Yes. Someone I knew at school.

579
00:39:36,520 --> 00:39:39,760
St Barnabas Roman Catholic,
not far from here.

580
00:39:39,760 --> 00:39:42,840
<font color="cyan">One of our old classmates</font>
had just died, and...

581
00:39:44,600 --> 00:39:47,320
No doubt you've already checked
up on the history of it all.

582
00:39:47,320 --> 00:39:48,720
No doubt I have.

583
00:39:48,720 --> 00:39:51,400
A rather queer business in which
a 14-year-old girl was found

584
00:39:51,400 --> 00:39:55,360
dead in bed,
with a red ring on her face.

585
00:39:55,360 --> 00:39:57,480
<font color="lime">No apparent explanation</font>
for what killed her,

586
00:39:57,480 --> 00:40:01,200
but the general consensus
was "sheer terror."

587
00:40:02,240 --> 00:40:05,800
More red rings were subsequently
reported on several other girls,

588
00:40:05,800 --> 00:40:07,440
but they lived to tell the tale.

589
00:40:09,480 --> 00:40:14,120
You can imagine the effect
it had on us - young,
<font color="cyan">impressionable schoolchildren.</font>

590
00:40:14,120 --> 00:40:18,200
Anyway, bizarre as it was,
it's all ancient history now,

591
00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:21,640
but there is something else,
Inspector, you might
be interested in

592
00:40:21,640 --> 00:40:26,080
that's rather more current,
and rather more sinister.

593
00:40:26,080 --> 00:40:29,160
And so this is saying what, exactly?

594
00:40:29,160 --> 00:40:33,040
<font color="white">They think there might be</font>
some kind of local secret society
in the village.

595
00:40:33,040 --> 00:40:35,080
This appeared 18 months ago,

596
00:40:35,080 --> 00:40:37,720
and I know plenty of people
say it's still going on.

597
00:40:37,720 --> 00:40:40,400
Arcane activities. You can
never get anyone to talk

598
00:40:40,400 --> 00:40:43,360
about it, of course, but we've
<font color="cyan">no idea what they're up to.</font>

599
00:40:43,360 --> 00:40:45,960
What, a few rolled-up trouser legs
and the odd moose head?

600
00:40:45,960 --> 00:40:48,680
I don't think we'll lose any sleep
over this one, Mrs Tartikoff.

601
00:40:48,680 --> 00:40:49,800
But rest assured,

602
00:40:49,800 --> 00:40:53,040
if I spot any dodgy handshakes in
the village, I'll let you know.

603
00:40:53,040 --> 00:40:56,240
<font color="cyan">Yes, well, I need to be getting off</font>
now, to this seminar.

604
00:40:56,240 --> 00:40:59,400
I am contactable,
if you need anything else.

605
00:40:59,400 --> 00:41:02,800
I understand, Mrs Tartikoff.
Life goes on.

606
00:41:02,800 --> 00:41:03,920
What?

607
00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:07,240
If I could ask you not to leave
the country until our enquiries
are completed...

608
00:41:09,360 --> 00:41:12,800
<font color="white">Load of old bollocks that was!</font>
Are you blind?

609
00:41:12,800 --> 00:41:16,800
That secret society thing was
so obviously just to get us
all out of this room. Why?

610
00:41:16,800 --> 00:41:19,720
Cos there was something in this
drawer, didn't you notice?

611
00:41:19,720 --> 00:41:22,320
That she very niftily locked away
<font color="white">when all that talk came up,</font>

612
00:41:22,320 --> 00:41:25,400
about her old school. So come on,
have you got all the gubbins?

613
00:41:25,400 --> 00:41:27,920
No, I have not got all the gubbins!

614
00:41:27,920 --> 00:41:30,920
This is a blatant intrusion into
the privacy of a grieving woman.

615
00:41:30,920 --> 00:41:33,440
Oh, don't be such an infant!
I'll do it myself.

616
00:41:36,000 --> 00:41:37,520
<font color="white">You know, you want to be careful.</font>

617
00:41:37,520 --> 00:41:40,440
Women who butter you up like that,
they're usually after something.

618
00:41:40,440 --> 00:41:43,080
Who said she was buttering
me... Put down that foot file!

619
00:41:43,080 --> 00:41:47,000
I demand that y... Do you have
you any idea the damage
you're doing with that?

620
00:41:47,000 --> 00:41:48,880
Right.

621
00:41:48,880 --> 00:41:50,480
<font color="white">OK.</font>

622
00:41:50,480 --> 00:41:53,400
Pound to the penny, this is what
she didn't want us to see.

623
00:41:53,400 --> 00:41:57,000
Postmark, same date as that text.

624
00:42:00,240 --> 00:42:02,520
Her down here on the right,
would you say?

625
00:42:02,520 --> 00:42:04,240
With three of her old buddies.

626
00:42:05,960 --> 00:42:08,960
Waxwood Cove, March '68.

627
00:42:08,960 --> 00:42:11,160
Waxwood Hall I thought that place
<font color="white">was called,</font>

628
00:42:11,160 --> 00:42:13,160
but named after somewhere
on the coast maybe?

629
00:42:13,160 --> 00:42:16,680
They all went to on a field
trip once, or... Mmm.

630
00:42:16,680 --> 00:42:18,960
And what have we got here
when it's at home?

631
00:42:18,960 --> 00:42:20,760
Some sort of schoolgirl's code?

632
00:42:20,760 --> 00:42:22,880
With a drawing of a hangman.

633
00:42:24,080 --> 00:42:27,240
<font color="white">Come on, you put all this together</font>
with "the year of the circles",

634
00:42:27,240 --> 00:42:32,440
why was she so keen to convince us
it was all just ancient history?

635
00:42:32,440 --> 00:42:36,160
And why did the word
'circles' have a capital C?

636
00:42:36,160 --> 00:42:38,880
Just get the feeling all that
weird stuff that happened there,

637
00:42:38,880 --> 00:42:41,160
<font color="white">there's got to be a connection.</font>

638
00:42:41,160 --> 00:42:43,640
Something that still haunts her
to this day

639
00:42:43,640 --> 00:42:47,040
and has somehow wormed its way
into every corner of her life.

640
00:42:49,320 --> 00:42:51,560
So, where exactly is this
Waxwood Hall?

641
00:43:05,960 --> 00:43:08,800
You know there's some interesting
stuff here, about this place

642
00:43:08,800 --> 00:43:10,640
<font color="white">when you start looking for it.</font>

643
00:43:10,640 --> 00:43:13,520
It says here, another thing
a lot of ex-pupils talked about

644
00:43:13,520 --> 00:43:16,000
was something called
the "quiet room",

645
00:43:16,000 --> 00:43:19,240
which was like a room where the
nuns would put unruly pupils

646
00:43:19,240 --> 00:43:21,800
with just some bread and water
and a bible

647
00:43:21,800 --> 00:43:26,160
<font color="white">"to study and contemplate and redeem</font>
themselves through prayer."

648
00:43:26,160 --> 00:43:28,800
Like being banged up in solitary
for the night.

649
00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:30,360
But what's weird is, listen to this:

650
00:43:30,360 --> 00:43:34,720
"Notwithstanding their rebellious
nature, many of the girls
who were thus confined

651
00:43:34,720 --> 00:43:38,720
<font color="white">"actually said they had seen God</font>
in the room, with several others

652
00:43:38,720 --> 00:43:43,920
"claiming they had actually been
touched by the blessed saint
as they reached out to him."

653
00:43:47,680 --> 00:43:50,880
METALLIC TWANGING NOISE

654
00:44:19,720 --> 00:44:22,800
Well, I think that gives the lie
to our "seaside trip".

655
00:44:22,800 --> 00:44:27,240
<font color="yellow">Question is why would you label</font>
a photo that was taken in that
room upstairs "Waxwood Cove"?

656
00:44:27,240 --> 00:44:30,520
Jonathan, I've got a horrible feeling
we're not alone in this place.

657
00:44:30,520 --> 00:44:33,200
I just heard this, I don't know what
it was, like this strange

658
00:44:33,200 --> 00:44:37,400
metallic twanging noise. Seemed to be
<font color="white">coming from down there, somewhere.</font>

659
00:44:41,000 --> 00:44:42,160
Wait here.

660
00:45:52,440 --> 00:45:55,520
Listen, I think
I might've sussed that code!

661
00:45:55,520 --> 00:45:58,160
Did they leave any chalk in here? Ah!

662
00:45:58,160 --> 00:46:01,600
There's a definite feeling in here.

663
00:46:01,600 --> 00:46:06,000
You shudder to imagine what it
was like living in this place.

664
00:46:06,000 --> 00:46:08,400
The clue is the hangman!

665
00:46:08,400 --> 00:46:11,880
<font color="white">You think about the hangman game -</font>
what's the first thing you do,

666
00:46:11,880 --> 00:46:14,120
before you try and guess the word?

667
00:46:14,120 --> 00:46:17,320
You draw a small horizontal
line for each letter.

668
00:46:18,840 --> 00:46:22,680
Except on this, it's the other way
round, which means...

669
00:46:25,040 --> 00:46:28,800
..if we fill in all
<font color="white">the base-lines afterwards...</font>

670
00:46:47,400 --> 00:46:48,400
Mmm.

671
00:46:49,800 --> 00:46:51,800
What do you mean, "Mmm"?

672
00:46:51,800 --> 00:46:54,360
That's got to be worth more than
"Mmm" any day of the week!

673
00:46:54,360 --> 00:46:56,920
I'd like to see you manage
to work that one out.

674
00:47:07,240 --> 00:47:08,760
But, no, very good.

675
00:47:11,240 --> 00:47:13,760
Question is,
<font color="yellow">WHAT would be at midnight?</font>

676
00:47:15,400 --> 00:47:17,440
It's easy to think that
"year of the Circles"

677
00:47:17,440 --> 00:47:20,440
referred to those rings that
appeared on their heads,

678
00:47:20,440 --> 00:47:24,360
but I don't know. The capital C
threw up another possibility that

679
00:47:24,360 --> 00:47:27,840
would dovetail rather neatly with
<font color="yellow">that photo taken upstairs.</font>

680
00:47:27,840 --> 00:47:32,720
Waxwood Cove quite obviously makes
no sense as a place name.

681
00:47:32,720 --> 00:47:35,920
But what if the end of that photo
had been cut off

682
00:47:35,920 --> 00:47:38,880
to remove something, or someone
else, from the picture

683
00:47:38,880 --> 00:47:41,600
and at the same time
<font color="yellow">part of the writing went with it.</font>

684
00:47:42,920 --> 00:47:46,040
Well it's...it's hardly a theory
we can test at this stage,

685
00:47:46,040 --> 00:47:50,360
but how much more tenable is the
idea of a Waxwood Coven

686
00:47:50,360 --> 00:47:55,000
and a group of mutinous Catholic
schoolgirls adopting the name of a
witch from Greek mythology -

687
00:47:55,000 --> 00:47:59,160
<font color="yellow">let's say, for example,</font>
the Four Circes

688
00:47:59,160 --> 00:48:06,160
which didn't quite make it
past the predictive text option
on that phone message. Oh, wow.

689
00:48:06,160 --> 00:48:09,320
So you think they might have had
their own little secret society

690
00:48:09,320 --> 00:48:12,160
that had something to do with those
<font color="white">rings and the girl that died?</font>

691
00:48:14,080 --> 00:48:19,120
Whatever it was that happened
that night, this suggests
they knew it was coming.

692
00:48:19,120 --> 00:48:22,680
And it's something she's still
trying to deal with.

693
00:48:25,320 --> 00:48:30,280
Well, I wonder where this
"quiet room" was, when it's at home.

694
00:49:43,680 --> 00:49:45,960
Ah! Agh!

695
00:49:49,680 --> 00:49:51,160
<font color="white">SHOUTS: Jonathan!</font>

696
00:50:00,960 --> 00:50:04,400
Joey? What happened? Are you OK?

697
00:50:04,400 --> 00:50:07,960
What...in the name of Hell
was all that about?!

698
00:50:18,240 --> 00:50:19,400
Back in a sec.

699
00:50:54,880 --> 00:50:57,960
So I guess we know now
how those nuns made them

700
00:50:57,960 --> 00:51:00,760
all feel they'd been
"touched by the Lord".

701
00:51:00,760 --> 00:51:04,520
<font color="yellow">It would appear someone round</font>
here's doing a rather naff
job of trying to frighten us off.

702
00:51:04,520 --> 00:51:07,760
Yes, not that naff!
Can we please just leave?

703
00:51:14,240 --> 00:51:15,320
Thank you.

704
00:51:17,600 --> 00:51:20,080
Fun and games for you there then,
Mr Creek.

705
00:51:20,080 --> 00:51:22,800
And I wonder what you'll
<font color="lime">make of this little gem.</font>

706
00:51:22,800 --> 00:51:27,280
Submitted by a local busybody
with a handy bit of surveillance kit
on his property.

707
00:51:27,280 --> 00:51:31,160
These are off a CCTV from the top
of a pole outside his house.

708
00:51:31,160 --> 00:51:34,440
Timed at 1.17am on the night
of Tartikoff's death.

709
00:51:36,320 --> 00:51:39,920
Like some kind of straw effigy.
<font color="white">Being burnt at the stake?</font>

710
00:51:43,720 --> 00:51:47,240
What do you think? WI been
watching The Wicker Man again?

711
00:51:47,240 --> 00:51:49,600
We popped along to that spot
this morning.

712
00:51:49,600 --> 00:51:51,800
Found nothing but a sea of ash,
of course.

713
00:51:51,800 --> 00:51:54,440
Anyway, have to love you
and leave you, I'm afraid.

714
00:51:54,440 --> 00:51:57,480
<font color="lime">Looks like we've found our elusive</font>
"GP" finally.

715
00:51:57,480 --> 00:52:00,800
Entry in the deceased's personal
organiser. Next Monday at ten,

716
00:52:00,800 --> 00:52:04,000
he had a meeting arranged with
a certain Greta Portland.

717
00:52:04,000 --> 00:52:06,920
Not many of those on the electoral
roll, but we have turned up one

718
00:52:06,920 --> 00:52:10,520
<font color="lime">in South Derbyshire, so anything</font>
exciting, I'll give you a bell.

719
00:52:14,880 --> 00:52:19,680
So, there you go, that's us both
booked in upstairs for later.

720
00:52:19,680 --> 00:52:22,520
You never worry at all what the
missus might make of all this?

721
00:52:22,520 --> 00:52:25,000
Remember,
she only knows you as Clark Kent.

722
00:52:26,720 --> 00:52:28,800
<font color="white">So that's it then now, is it?</font>

723
00:52:28,800 --> 00:52:32,920
Pulling women out of elephants
and sawing rabbits in half.
All done with.

724
00:52:32,920 --> 00:52:35,360
All done with, thank you.

725
00:52:35,360 --> 00:52:38,400
It's a little thing called "growth",
you should try it some time.

726
00:52:41,800 --> 00:52:45,440
Course, he never said, did he,
<font color="white">where those pictures were taken,</font>

727
00:52:45,440 --> 00:52:48,400
but if we're talking fields
and farms,

728
00:52:48,400 --> 00:52:50,680
I think I might know someone
who can help.

729
00:52:51,880 --> 00:52:54,640
So just a very quick recap,
if I may.

730
00:52:54,640 --> 00:52:57,800
This guy Brad, you think may be
able to help us,

731
00:52:57,800 --> 00:53:00,360
<font color="yellow">you don't actually know his surname.</font>

732
00:53:00,360 --> 00:53:02,320
Or where he comes from.

733
00:53:02,320 --> 00:53:05,800
Or his phone number, or his address.

734
00:53:05,800 --> 00:53:09,240
Or anything about his background, or
basically anything about him at all.

735
00:53:09,240 --> 00:53:12,040
Well, no,
we didn't really get that far.

736
00:53:12,040 --> 00:53:13,720
You only got as far as sex.

737
00:53:13,720 --> 00:53:17,080
<font color="white">Well, yes. It was a very cold day.</font>

738
00:53:17,080 --> 00:53:20,440
A very cold day? Of all the spurious
mitigation!

739
00:53:20,440 --> 00:53:22,280
What happened to putting on a scarf?

740
00:53:24,320 --> 00:53:26,200
I despair of the modern generation.

741
00:53:26,200 --> 00:53:28,520
Hey, don't take your bedroom
frustrations out on me!

742
00:53:28,520 --> 00:53:31,080
Just cos you're off the market now.
<font color="yellow">I beg your pardon?</font>

743
00:53:31,080 --> 00:53:33,240
And the reason I didn't pursue it,

744
00:53:33,240 --> 00:53:35,880
was when I found out she was still
technically in the frame,

745
00:53:35,880 --> 00:53:38,280
I just thought
I should fall on my sword.

746
00:53:38,280 --> 00:53:41,000
But not before you'd
fallen on his sword!

747
00:53:43,520 --> 00:53:46,120
God, you can't turn it off,
<font color="white">can you? What now?</font>

748
00:53:47,600 --> 00:53:49,360
This piece of timber...

749
00:53:50,760 --> 00:53:53,560
..has been very recently fixed
across that post,

750
00:53:53,560 --> 00:53:55,240
about six feet off the ground.

751
00:53:56,520 --> 00:53:57,760
And we know that how?

752
00:53:59,440 --> 00:54:02,920
Pattern of old slug trails,
you can just make out.

753
00:54:06,360 --> 00:54:11,200
And these hooks, with what appear
<font color="yellow">to be wisps of rope through them...</font>

754
00:54:12,800 --> 00:54:14,320
..it's almost like...

755
00:54:16,880 --> 00:54:20,080
Ah. Funnily enough,
we were just talking about you.

756
00:54:37,600 --> 00:54:39,400
KNOCK AT DOOR

757
00:54:50,080 --> 00:54:51,560
Can we talk?

758
00:55:08,680 --> 00:55:11,200
MOBILE PHONE RINGS

759
00:55:12,760 --> 00:55:13,880
Fariba Tartikoff.

760
00:55:14,960 --> 00:55:16,160
Sorry?

761
00:55:17,520 --> 00:55:20,640
Sorry, it's a terrible line. Just
<font color="lime">one second, can you hold on?</font>

762
00:55:20,640 --> 00:55:23,520
I'm just seeing
if I can get a better signal here.

763
00:55:23,520 --> 00:55:25,120
Ah, hello?

764
00:55:25,120 --> 00:55:26,760
Eileen...sorry?

765
00:55:28,360 --> 00:55:30,240
Eileen Aubrey?

766
00:55:30,240 --> 00:55:31,600
No, no, no!

767
00:55:31,600 --> 00:55:35,400
Of course I know your work,
obviously, yes! Yeah, sure,

768
00:55:35,400 --> 00:55:40,160
I can do. Any reason why we have
<font color="lime">to meet there or...?</font>

769
00:55:43,400 --> 00:55:45,800
No, that's fine.

770
00:55:45,800 --> 00:55:47,120
OK.

771
00:55:50,400 --> 00:55:52,520
OK, yeah, got that.

772
00:55:53,960 --> 00:55:55,920
Right, well, I'll see you then.

773
00:56:03,760 --> 00:56:06,800
You and I, Jonathan,
we both see the world as it is.

774
00:56:08,640 --> 00:56:12,520
Gods and spirits, and magic,
and miracles!

775
00:56:12,520 --> 00:56:14,800
The eternal refuge of the credulous.

776
00:56:16,240 --> 00:56:20,280
<font color="cyan">And yet...and yet. </font><font color="yellow">I know.</font>

777
00:56:20,280 --> 00:56:23,800
For all the niggling little pointers
in this case, that seemed to

778
00:56:23,800 --> 00:56:29,040
promise so much, as things stand,
you have to say, what happened

779
00:56:29,040 --> 00:56:33,720
in that room with your husband
just isn't physically possible.

780
00:56:39,360 --> 00:56:42,520
<font color="cyan">I've never told this to anyone,</font>
but...

781
00:56:42,520 --> 00:56:45,880
I had, once, an experience
at school.

782
00:56:45,880 --> 00:56:49,080
In which you were locked in a room
with bread and water and a bible,

783
00:56:49,080 --> 00:56:52,000
and a portrait of St Barnabas,
and you had a vision of God?

784
00:56:54,480 --> 00:56:58,600
Along with a whole load
<font color="yellow">of other pupils who were sent</font>
to the "quiet room".

785
00:56:58,600 --> 00:57:01,920
Not quite the miracle it
seemed at the time, I would suggest.

786
00:57:04,200 --> 00:57:08,240
But the reason you buried it,
I'm guessing now,

787
00:57:08,240 --> 00:57:11,680
is because you couldn't face
the idea of being judged...

788
00:57:11,680 --> 00:57:16,680
<font color="yellow">for a mortal sin, committed by you</font>
and your Catholic school friends

789
00:57:16,680 --> 00:57:21,760
who belonged to this, whatever it
was called, Waxwood Hall
witches' coven.

790
00:57:24,680 --> 00:57:26,120
The Sisters of Circe.

791
00:57:28,400 --> 00:57:31,840
There's a nice Woody Allen story
about a guy goes to the opera

792
00:57:31,840 --> 00:57:34,160
and accidentally
<font color="yellow">falls into the orchestra pit.</font>

793
00:57:34,160 --> 00:57:36,120
Too proud to admit his mistake,

794
00:57:36,120 --> 00:57:39,920
he goes back every night for a month
and does exactly the same thing.

795
00:57:41,120 --> 00:57:44,560
There's an echo of that here,
isn't there?

796
00:57:44,560 --> 00:57:48,760
Those red rings that appeared
on all the other girls' heads

797
00:57:48,760 --> 00:57:52,640
<font color="yellow">just had to be a smokescreen</font>
you deliberately repeated,

798
00:57:52,640 --> 00:57:58,160
to make other people think the first
one was part of some bigger,
supernatural mystery.

799
00:58:00,600 --> 00:58:03,320
I can speculate, Rosalind,
till the cows come home,

800
00:58:03,320 --> 00:58:07,840
about what happened
that day, "at midnight"...

801
00:58:09,840 --> 00:58:14,320
<font color="yellow">..but some kind of initiation rite</font>
for the new girl
that went horribly wrong?

802
00:58:19,040 --> 00:58:23,840
The cruellest irony - she was
so desperate to join.

803
00:58:23,840 --> 00:58:27,480
Of course we told her she'd
first of all have to prove herself.

804
00:58:27,480 --> 00:58:31,200
Survive this fiendish endurance
test we'd prepared for her.

805
00:58:34,280 --> 00:58:37,840
<font color="white">The time has come.</font>
Midnight is upon us all.

806
00:58:37,840 --> 00:58:41,880
The witching hour.
The witching hour.

807
00:58:41,880 --> 00:58:45,040
Prepare you now to join
the daughters of Lucifer.

808
00:58:45,040 --> 00:58:47,920
The sisters of Circes.
And nor shall you cry.

809
00:58:50,640 --> 00:58:53,000
Prepare to face your darkness.

810
00:58:59,680 --> 00:59:04,520
<font color="cyan">What we had no way of knowing -</font>
how could we possibly have known -

811
00:59:04,520 --> 00:59:06,800
She had an allergy to bees.

812
00:59:06,800 --> 00:59:11,720
Something we found out, by purest
chance, weeks, months later.

813
00:59:13,120 --> 00:59:17,680
To my dying day, I'll never forget
the way she struggled!

814
00:59:19,320 --> 00:59:22,560
She was trying to tell us
<font color="cyan">her life was in danger.</font>

815
00:59:23,960 --> 00:59:27,440
Somewhere along the line,
her heart gave out.

816
00:59:27,440 --> 00:59:33,040
The fear, the sheer terror,
she just stopped breathing.

817
00:59:35,320 --> 00:59:36,760
How did this happen?!

818
00:59:38,840 --> 00:59:40,000
What could we do?

819
00:59:41,600 --> 00:59:45,680
To our eternal shame,
we did nothing.

820
00:59:48,880 --> 00:59:50,440
None of this ever happened.

821
00:59:53,240 --> 00:59:57,040
<font color="cyan">Our minds were already so crammed</font>
with make-believe.

822
00:59:57,040 --> 01:00:02,680
Was it one more act of rebellion
to create this monstrous lie

823
01:00:02,680 --> 01:00:05,400
we'd have to live with
for the rest of our days?

824
01:00:06,880 --> 01:00:09,120
Sister!

825
01:00:09,120 --> 01:00:12,200
SCREAMS

826
01:00:12,200 --> 01:00:15,920
Even when she wrote to me, Beth,
<font color="cyan">and sent me the photo...</font>

827
01:00:18,600 --> 01:00:23,120
..how could I bear, even now,
to look into those eyes?

828
01:00:31,080 --> 01:00:35,080
How could I seek forgiveness
when there was no one there?

829
01:00:37,680 --> 01:00:39,080
You see my problem?

830
01:00:40,880 --> 01:00:45,720
Existence of a supreme being may
be one for another day,

831
01:00:45,720 --> 01:00:49,080
but whoever those fingers
<font color="yellow">belonged to,</font>

832
01:00:49,080 --> 01:00:52,640
you touched in that room, it
certainly wasn't God or any saint.

833
01:00:54,680 --> 01:00:58,880
If it wasn't for the setting
of a girls' convent school,

834
01:00:58,880 --> 01:01:05,040
any kind of instant religious
experience in the mid-1960s
wouldn't take a lot of explaining.

835
01:01:05,040 --> 01:01:08,040
Especially when you
<font color="yellow">factor in a supply of sugar cubes.</font>

836
01:01:10,600 --> 01:01:14,040
Did they even have any idea
what they were playing about with?

837
01:01:54,280 --> 01:01:56,120
Polly's in New York, did you say?

838
01:01:58,080 --> 01:01:59,480
Yeah, till Monday.

839
01:02:01,680 --> 01:02:03,240
She's a lucky girl.

840
01:02:14,520 --> 01:02:16,200
RINGS DOORBELL

841
01:02:33,840 --> 01:02:36,520
MOBILE PHONE RINGS

842
01:02:39,480 --> 01:02:41,000
Jonathan Creek.

843
01:02:41,000 --> 01:02:43,960
<font color="yellow">Yeah, she was here, only just left.</font>

844
01:02:43,960 --> 01:02:47,520
Actually we...we got to the bottom
of a couple of things, which...

845
01:02:49,000 --> 01:02:50,680
Sorry - when was this? 'Down here!'

846
01:02:50,680 --> 01:02:53,240
Someone called Eileen Aubrey?

847
01:02:53,240 --> 01:02:57,640
Wanted her to meet up at eight
o'clock tonight in the "East Barn".

848
01:02:57,640 --> 01:02:59,520
<font color="white">'I looked up the name,'</font>

849
01:02:59,520 --> 01:03:02,040
she writes for
one of these TV trade papers,

850
01:03:02,040 --> 01:03:03,880
but at that time of night?

851
01:03:03,880 --> 01:03:06,080
Don't know, someone's up
to something round here.

852
01:03:06,080 --> 01:03:07,840
What if it's some kind of set-up?

853
01:03:09,440 --> 01:03:13,400
I mean, I don't know. Whoever tried
to throttle me in that room,
<font color="white">what if...(INAUDIBLE)</font>

854
01:04:11,480 --> 01:04:15,080
ORIENTAL MUSIC PLAYS

855
01:04:32,320 --> 01:04:36,000
You're not telling me this is what
that secret society was all about?

856
01:04:36,000 --> 01:04:38,720
Only one of your soppy
Magic Circle outfits.

857
01:04:51,760 --> 01:04:54,720
That's what it was that was
missing from that photo.

858
01:04:58,240 --> 01:05:00,440
I can see it now, plain as day.

859
01:05:02,880 --> 01:05:05,440
<font color="yellow">Africa. </font><font color="white">What?</font>

860
01:05:05,440 --> 01:05:07,880
APPLAUSE BELOW

861
01:05:07,880 --> 01:05:10,640
No sign of Fariba here, I notice.

862
01:05:10,640 --> 01:05:13,160
And it's just coming up
to eight o'clock now.

863
01:05:18,360 --> 01:05:19,520
Hang on.

864
01:05:20,680 --> 01:05:22,400
East Barn, you said?

865
01:05:23,960 --> 01:05:27,480
But if the moon's over there...
No, I wrote it down.

866
01:05:27,480 --> 01:05:30,120
<font color="white">That's exactly what she put.</font>

867
01:05:30,120 --> 01:05:33,120
You didn't say she put a full stop!

868
01:05:33,120 --> 01:05:36,280
So? Cos it's not East Barn at all,
is it?

869
01:05:36,280 --> 01:05:40,240
EA - Eileen Aubrey. St Barnabas.

870
01:05:41,880 --> 01:05:43,600
We're in the wrong place!

871
01:06:13,200 --> 01:06:15,800
METALLIC TWANGING SOUND

872
01:07:11,120 --> 01:07:12,560
Look out! Ah! No!

873
01:07:17,200 --> 01:07:18,680
<font color="lime">No!</font>

874
01:07:18,680 --> 01:07:22,160
They said you might be...in
some...some danger.

875
01:07:22,160 --> 01:07:24,920
I followed you here.
Don't try to talk!

876
01:07:39,400 --> 01:07:41,960
Oh!
SHE SOBS

877
01:08:02,760 --> 01:08:07,600
You always said there are some
things we can never know.

878
01:08:13,760 --> 01:08:18,560
So, is this where
I have to admit you were right?

879
01:08:36,960 --> 01:08:38,560
<font color="cyan">What a bore.</font>

880
01:08:53,920 --> 01:08:56,720
This won't take us long,
ladies and gentlemen.

881
01:08:56,720 --> 01:08:59,040
But on the back of last night's
tragic developments,

882
01:08:59,040 --> 01:09:01,680
I thought it might be a good idea
to just pool our thoughts

883
01:09:01,680 --> 01:09:05,400
and see if we can't nudge this one,
finally, into the back of the net.

884
01:09:05,400 --> 01:09:08,280
<font color="lime">Sceptic, as I was, about all that</font>
secret society nonsense,

885
01:09:08,280 --> 01:09:11,320
it turns out to have been
at the very heart of this illusion.

886
01:09:11,320 --> 01:09:14,240
An illusion as ingenious
as it was macabre.

887
01:09:14,240 --> 01:09:17,640
And perpetrated, it seems,
for the most perverse of motives.

888
01:09:19,120 --> 01:09:22,800
The disappearing body deprived us
<font color="lime">of one crucial piece of information</font>

889
01:09:22,800 --> 01:09:26,360
that would have unravelled
this case in seconds.

890
01:09:26,360 --> 01:09:28,200
HOW the victim was killed.

891
01:09:29,560 --> 01:09:33,240
No body, but there was a photo.

892
01:09:34,840 --> 01:09:38,840
A photo that confirmed what everyone
saw - Franklin Tartikoff lying

893
01:09:38,840 --> 01:09:42,760
against the wall, one arm behind his
<font color="yellow">back, the other hand in his pocket.</font>

894
01:09:43,880 --> 01:09:45,240
Distinctly odd.

895
01:09:45,240 --> 01:09:48,680
And clearly deliberately
engineered by another party.

896
01:09:48,680 --> 01:09:49,640
But why?

897
01:09:51,240 --> 01:09:54,960
A fleeting image last night
of a revolving pumpkin

898
01:09:54,960 --> 01:09:56,680
suddenly unlocked it for me.

899
01:09:58,320 --> 01:10:00,960
What it was that had changed
<font color="yellow">between these two pictures,</font>

900
01:10:00,960 --> 01:10:03,760
before and after the body
disappeared.

901
01:10:03,760 --> 01:10:08,640
The logic of which led directly to
the reason why that hand

902
01:10:08,640 --> 01:10:11,520
had to be kept out of sight
in that pocket.

903
01:10:13,800 --> 01:10:15,760
Because there was no hand.

904
01:10:20,920 --> 01:10:24,080
For all his credentials
<font color="yellow">as this iconic polymath,</font>

905
01:10:24,080 --> 01:10:26,520
there was a lighter side,
wasn't there, to your father,

906
01:10:26,520 --> 01:10:30,320
that was all of a piece
with his early work in TV and radio.

907
01:10:30,320 --> 01:10:32,880
And yet another passion,

908
01:10:32,880 --> 01:10:35,920
that he took a mischievous
delight in keeping secret.

909
01:10:38,040 --> 01:10:39,400
Nemo dicite.

910
01:10:40,680 --> 01:10:44,840
<font color="lime">"Tell no one". The society was</font>
very strict about all that.

911
01:10:46,400 --> 01:10:50,680
Like everything he turned his mind
to, magic became quite a skill.

912
01:10:51,960 --> 01:10:57,440
Rather like yourself,
he had all these amazing ideas
for different props.

913
01:10:57,440 --> 01:11:00,480
He'd design, I'd put together.

914
01:11:01,480 --> 01:11:05,000
Then we'd meet up to make sure
<font color="lime">it all worked.</font>

915
01:11:05,000 --> 01:11:07,360
THUNDER RUMBLES

916
01:11:07,360 --> 01:11:09,280
MOBILE PHONE RINGS

917
01:11:09,280 --> 01:11:10,640
Hey.

918
01:11:11,840 --> 01:11:12,920
Yeah, all set.

919
01:11:15,480 --> 01:11:17,800
In some ways, the perfect
night for it.

920
01:11:26,880 --> 01:11:29,520
'It took me three weeks to build.

921
01:11:29,520 --> 01:11:33,600
'A woman sawn in half and the blade
appears to go right through,
<font color="lime">into the wood.</font>

922
01:11:34,960 --> 01:11:38,880
'We were all set to give it
a trial run...when it happened.'

923
01:11:43,800 --> 01:11:47,240
CHAINSAW ENGINE REVS

924
01:12:08,080 --> 01:12:09,560
HE COUGHS

925
01:12:13,240 --> 01:12:16,400
'There was only one person
I could think of turning to.'

926
01:12:20,520 --> 01:12:21,560
Franklin...

927
01:12:24,280 --> 01:12:27,400
I always knew...
there was something else.

928
01:12:28,760 --> 01:12:30,560
<font color="lime">The way he was with me...</font>

929
01:12:31,920 --> 01:12:33,920
..it wasn't such a secret
round here.

930
01:12:35,720 --> 01:12:38,440
What if no one believed me?

931
01:12:38,440 --> 01:12:40,400
What if they thought I'd done this?

932
01:12:42,840 --> 01:12:45,120
THUNDERCLAPS

933
01:12:46,400 --> 01:12:47,440
Look...

934
01:12:49,680 --> 01:12:52,920
All I could think
about was my mother.

935
01:12:52,920 --> 01:12:54,120
Somehow,

936
01:12:54,120 --> 01:12:57,600
<font color="cyan">if I could make it look like he'd</font>
never left the house,

937
01:12:57,600 --> 01:13:00,400
at least she'd be spared
the worst of that horror.

938
01:13:00,400 --> 01:13:01,400
OK, look at me...

939
01:13:01,400 --> 01:13:05,920
'It was like, in some weird way,
I was being tested.

940
01:13:05,920 --> 01:13:08,280
'This was my chance
to make it happen,

941
01:13:09,520 --> 01:13:11,200
<font color="cyan">'what cannot be explained.'</font>

942
01:14:55,600 --> 01:14:58,400
SHE KNOCKS
Fariba?

943
01:14:58,400 --> 01:15:01,120
'I could make it seem like he'd been
attacked in that room.'

944
01:15:01,120 --> 01:15:02,880
SHE GASPS
Oh, God.

945
01:15:02,880 --> 01:15:04,520
Fariba!

946
01:15:10,440 --> 01:15:13,040
SHE HYPERVENTILATES
'The body would disappear,

947
01:15:13,040 --> 01:15:16,080
<font color="cyan">'but she would absolutely swear it</font>
had been there.

948
01:15:16,080 --> 01:15:18,800
'It would look like the
flap had just slipped back again.

949
01:15:18,800 --> 01:15:20,360
'She'd go off and ring the police

950
01:15:20,360 --> 01:15:23,640
'and I'd have, maybe ten minutes
to take it all apart.

951
01:15:23,640 --> 01:15:27,200
'When she never moved from outside
door, I had to improvise.'

952
01:16:01,640 --> 01:16:04,880
<font color="cyan">'Amazingly, I found a few</font>
minutes before the police arrived,

953
01:16:04,880 --> 01:16:06,040
'to recover it all.'

954
01:16:16,120 --> 01:16:19,640
The fact that that globe had
revolved 180 degrees,

955
01:16:19,640 --> 01:16:21,400
of course, proved nothing.

956
01:16:21,400 --> 01:16:24,040
But it was enough to trigger
the only real insight

957
01:16:24,040 --> 01:16:25,720
that made any sense here,

958
01:16:25,720 --> 01:16:28,480
<font color="yellow">that all we actually need</font>
to think we've seen a body

959
01:16:28,480 --> 01:16:30,280
is the head.

960
01:16:30,280 --> 01:16:33,200
The rest, more or less,
we don't even question.

961
01:16:33,200 --> 01:16:34,960
Except for the hands.

962
01:16:36,200 --> 01:16:39,000
That was where it all started
to unravel.

963
01:16:41,160 --> 01:16:42,400
Maybe...

964
01:16:44,400 --> 01:16:47,280
<font color="cyan">Maybe I just dared to hope somewhere</font>
in that night of hell,

965
01:16:47,280 --> 01:16:50,120
there was some... purpose.

966
01:16:51,400 --> 01:16:55,400
That I could take her to a place
where science would desert her.

967
01:16:58,920 --> 01:17:00,280
Before she left us,

968
01:17:02,120 --> 01:17:04,200
something deeper,

969
01:17:04,200 --> 01:17:07,160
more meaningful
might find its way into her life.

970
01:17:22,120 --> 01:17:26,240
<font color="cyan">Of course we still don't know who,</font>
or what, made that statue come down.

971
01:17:26,240 --> 01:17:29,440
Or why the flat of a retired
postmistress called Greta Portland

972
01:17:29,440 --> 01:17:31,880
had been turned over
and not a penny stolen.

973
01:17:33,040 --> 01:17:34,360
Accident?

974
01:17:34,360 --> 01:17:35,880
Coincidence?

975
01:17:35,880 --> 01:17:37,400
Maybe.

976
01:17:37,400 --> 01:17:41,480
<font color="cyan">Or maybe there's one more sting in</font>
the tail here yet we can't foresee.

977
01:17:48,400 --> 01:17:50,520
One for the professionals,
I think.

978
01:17:55,040 --> 01:17:56,400
TEXT MESSAGE ALERT

979
01:18:08,040 --> 01:18:09,600
Oh...

980
01:18:11,120 --> 01:18:16,280
There you go, staring us right in
the face again as usual. What?

981
01:18:16,280 --> 01:18:17,920
I'll tell you in a bit.

982
01:18:17,920 --> 01:18:20,760
<font color="yellow">Suffice to say, that on this</font>
occasion, predictive text

983
01:18:20,760 --> 01:18:23,280
would've have done us all a very big
favour.

984
01:18:23,280 --> 01:18:25,640
DIALS A NUMBER

985
01:18:43,960 --> 01:18:47,160
Yes, got that.

986
01:18:47,160 --> 01:18:49,440
That's great.

987
01:18:49,440 --> 01:18:52,440
Erm, I do kind of need to, yes.

988
01:18:52,440 --> 01:18:55,280
'If this checks out, God only knows
<font color="yellow">what's gonna kick off.'</font>

989
01:18:55,280 --> 01:18:56,800
Oh, great(!)

990
01:18:56,800 --> 01:18:58,920
And so what about Arabella's 40th?

991
01:18:58,920 --> 01:19:01,520
I mean, what time are you going
to be..?

992
01:19:01,520 --> 01:19:03,000
I'll give you a call, OK?

993
01:19:03,000 --> 01:19:05,960
Oh, and if anyone else comes
asking for that address,

994
01:19:05,960 --> 01:19:08,000
'very sorry, but you can't help.'

995
01:19:08,000 --> 01:19:09,360
<font color="yellow">OK?</font>

996
01:19:09,360 --> 01:19:10,840
Take care, bye.

997
01:19:12,560 --> 01:19:14,320
CAR ENGINE STARTS

998
01:19:31,120 --> 01:19:34,920
So this person I'm about to meet,
when you say keep an open mind,

999
01:19:34,920 --> 01:19:37,040
what's that supposed to...

1000
01:19:38,480 --> 01:19:40,720
Jonathan, hi. I got your message.

1001
01:19:40,720 --> 01:19:42,400
Jacqueline, this is Joey.

1002
01:19:44,240 --> 01:19:47,000
So I think you've got a DVD
<font color="yellow">we might be interested in.</font>

1003
01:19:57,280 --> 01:20:00,760
How often does it happen?
We all type "great" and get "Greta".

1004
01:20:03,280 --> 01:20:06,080
I'd even seen
it on a guest list a few weeks ago.

1005
01:20:06,080 --> 01:20:08,560
Don't think you know Jack, producer
extraordinaire?

1006
01:20:08,560 --> 01:20:11,040
You still based in Euston,
have I remembered that right?

1007
01:20:11,040 --> 01:20:13,960
<font color="white">Talking of sat navs, have</font>
you had any luck with that demo tape?

1008
01:20:13,960 --> 01:20:16,600
I meant to ask...
FADES OUT

1009
01:20:16,600 --> 01:20:18,560
I had some fanciful notion,

1010
01:20:18,560 --> 01:20:21,760
if we could sell it as a series,
he might come on board...

1011
01:20:21,760 --> 01:20:23,360
in an advisory capacity.

1012
01:20:27,280 --> 01:20:29,640
'So if we can maintain that
<font color="lime">fiction,</font>

1013
01:20:29,640 --> 01:20:32,120
'which seems to be working well for
us at the moment,

1014
01:20:32,120 --> 01:20:35,600
'if we can get 50% of the media to
swallow our story

1015
01:20:35,600 --> 01:20:37,240
'then we're home and dry.'

1016
01:20:37,240 --> 01:20:39,640
My God, is that..?

1017
01:20:39,640 --> 01:20:41,400
How did you get hold of this?

1018
01:20:41,400 --> 01:20:44,080
INDISTINCT VOICES ON TV

1019
01:20:52,880 --> 01:20:55,320
<font color="white">LOUD MUSIC AND MUTED TV VOICES</font>

1020
01:21:22,600 --> 01:21:24,600
Well, I'm gobsmacked.

1021
01:21:24,600 --> 01:21:26,880
You imagine if this went public?

1022
01:21:26,880 --> 01:21:29,360
This is what everyone's been saying,
for the last ten years.

1023
01:21:29,360 --> 01:21:31,720
I mean, complete and absolute proof

1024
01:21:31,720 --> 01:21:34,560
they were all lying through their
teeth. It's lethal.

1025
01:21:34,560 --> 01:21:37,880
<font color="yellow">What's known in the business,</font>
I think, as 'a smoking gun'.

1026
01:21:37,880 --> 01:21:39,880
Or at least it would be...

1027
01:21:39,880 --> 01:21:41,440
if any of it was real.

1028
01:21:42,560 --> 01:21:45,040
The production,
we were more than happy with.

1029
01:21:45,040 --> 01:21:48,200
Uncanny look-alikes and some
brilliant mimics for the voices.

1030
01:21:48,200 --> 01:21:51,920
I just felt, as late-night satire,
<font color="cyan">it was all a bit clunky.</font>

1031
01:21:52,960 --> 01:21:56,160
Whereas Franklin, I know,
would've given it some wit.

1032
01:21:56,160 --> 01:22:00,240
But how scary is it, that certain
people in very high places

1033
01:22:00,240 --> 01:22:02,640
appear to have somehow got wind of
this footage,

1034
01:22:02,640 --> 01:22:05,600
and took it completely
at face value?

1035
01:22:05,600 --> 01:22:08,840
<font color="yellow">Then everything we're told never</font>
happens in real life,

1036
01:22:08,840 --> 01:22:11,240
tracking down every copy of the DVD,

1037
01:22:11,240 --> 01:22:14,280
and neutralising anyone who might
have known about it...

1038
01:22:15,680 --> 01:22:18,440
..has been going on,
right under our noses.

1039
01:22:19,480 --> 01:22:22,400
Oh, God. Because Fariba works in
documentaries,

1040
01:22:22,400 --> 01:22:24,800
<font color="white">she could've been a threat.</font>

1041
01:22:24,800 --> 01:22:27,240
And that chainsaw coming to
bits...

1042
01:22:28,800 --> 01:22:30,680
You don't think that was..?

1043
01:22:35,720 --> 01:22:37,680
Oh, shit.

1044
01:22:37,680 --> 01:22:39,280
SHE WHIMPERS

1045
01:22:41,040 --> 01:22:44,200
Oh, God. Polly...
Uh-uh-uh.

1046
01:22:44,200 --> 01:22:47,520
How is that a smart move?
Come on.

1047
01:22:47,520 --> 01:22:51,160
<font color="cyan">It's OK, you can all relax.</font>

1048
01:22:51,160 --> 01:22:52,760
Oh God, Jonathan.

1049
01:22:52,760 --> 01:22:55,760
We've just got one little
job to take care of

1050
01:22:55,760 --> 01:22:57,520
and then we'll be out of your hair.

1051
01:23:00,960 --> 01:23:02,600
THEY SCREAM

1052
01:23:16,200 --> 01:23:18,400
Just so we've got all bases covered.

1053
01:23:18,400 --> 01:23:21,280
You don't need to do this,
none of that's real!

1054
01:23:23,040 --> 01:23:24,320
<font color="cyan">Insurance policy.</font>

1055
01:23:25,480 --> 01:23:28,840
We'll see what you make of this
locked room.

1056
01:23:28,840 --> 01:23:30,080
OK!

1057
01:23:31,080 --> 01:23:34,640
I hate to be a killjoy, but that's
not going to work, I'm afraid.

1058
01:23:37,080 --> 01:23:38,360
No, no...

1059
01:23:38,360 --> 01:23:40,480
You think so?

1060
01:23:41,480 --> 01:23:43,040
Try me.

1061
01:23:54,160 --> 01:23:55,560
No!

1062
01:24:01,960 --> 01:24:04,240
Yes, it's dangerous stuff, petrol.

1063
01:24:04,240 --> 01:24:06,280
<font color="white">When I got my lads to</font>
search your car,

1064
01:24:06,280 --> 01:24:08,520
I couldn't quite work out what
it was doing there.

1065
01:24:08,520 --> 01:24:11,080
So I had them replace it with
diluted apple juice.

1066
01:24:11,080 --> 01:24:13,440
Hell of a lot safer,
and healthier too, you'll find.

1067
01:24:13,440 --> 01:24:15,400
I don't think so, matey-girl.

1068
01:24:21,480 --> 01:24:22,920
<font color="white">God, you lot took your time!</font>

1069
01:24:22,920 --> 01:24:26,360
Go on, back to the nick with them,
the fun's over.

1070
01:24:26,360 --> 01:24:27,520
Move!

1071
01:24:27,520 --> 01:24:30,000
All done? All done!

1072
01:24:30,000 --> 01:24:32,080
VOICES DROWNED OUT BY MUSIC

1073
01:24:51,480 --> 01:24:54,320
It all had to start somewhere.

1074
01:24:54,320 --> 01:24:56,320
I'm afraid it started with me.

1075
01:24:56,320 --> 01:24:59,480
A man
<font color="lime">who couldn't keep his mouth shut.</font>

1076
01:25:02,120 --> 01:25:05,640
That last day,
I went round to check him over.

1077
01:25:06,680 --> 01:25:08,840
I found myself alone
in the study.

1078
01:25:08,880 --> 01:25:10,320
Ah, that'll be Fariba,

1079
01:25:10,320 --> 01:25:12,840
she told me she'd call me
when she landed. Do you mind?

1080
01:25:12,840 --> 01:25:13,840
No, no...

1081
01:25:21,320 --> 01:25:24,600
'It was devastating stuff,
<font color="lime">as I thought.</font>

1082
01:25:25,640 --> 01:25:29,600
'I mean, absolute
political dynamite.

1083
01:25:29,600 --> 01:25:33,520
'I may have mentioned it the next
day to a friend at the golf club.

1084
01:25:33,520 --> 01:25:35,360
'A gentleman...

1085
01:25:35,360 --> 01:25:38,400
'Well, let's say rather well
placed in Whitehall.'

1086
01:25:41,320 --> 01:25:44,760
We can only guess how far it went
...up the ladder.

1087
01:25:45,880 --> 01:25:47,280
<font color="cyan">Far enough, at any rate,</font>

1088
01:25:47,280 --> 01:25:49,760
for a couple of specialists
to be planted on my team

1089
01:25:49,760 --> 01:25:52,200
having
already set about their dirty work.

1090
01:26:00,960 --> 01:26:03,400
Took me a while to rumble that
one, I'm afraid.

1091
01:26:03,400 --> 01:26:06,480
Who else could've beaten me
to that false lead in Derbyshire?

1092
01:26:06,480 --> 01:26:08,600
<font color="cyan">They'll take the rap for all this</font>
today,

1093
01:26:08,600 --> 01:26:10,360
but that's about all.

1094
01:26:10,360 --> 01:26:12,520
Far too smart to leave any
footprints.

1095
01:26:12,520 --> 01:26:14,480
Bit like the people they're
protecting?

1096
01:26:14,480 --> 01:26:16,200
Well, we all know how it works.

1097
01:26:16,200 --> 01:26:19,200
Smooth tongue, big smile
and the right hand gestures,

1098
01:26:19,200 --> 01:26:21,840
<font color="cyan">you really CAN get away with murder.</font>

1099
01:26:21,840 --> 01:26:23,600
Anyway, thanks.

1100
01:26:23,600 --> 01:26:25,240
No, thank you.

1101
01:26:25,240 --> 01:26:26,920
Enjoy the rest of your Sunday.

1102
01:26:31,600 --> 01:26:32,760
In deciphering the puzzle,

1103
01:26:32,760 --> 01:26:35,200
my attention was drawn to several
key details...

1104
01:26:35,200 --> 01:26:38,840
the prints of the shoes, which
landed in an unusual position
<font color="lime">against the wall,</font>

1105
01:26:38,840 --> 01:26:41,040
the way the globe had turned around,

1106
01:26:41,040 --> 01:26:43,720
suggesting it might have been opened
up and used as...

1107
01:26:43,720 --> 01:26:45,120
some kind of hiding place

1108
01:26:45,120 --> 01:26:47,880
and you go through all the various
clues. I mean, it's brilliant!

1109
01:26:47,880 --> 01:26:51,360
Obviously, I know his nibs here's
<font color="white">got no taste any more for that kind</font>
of publicity.

1110
01:26:51,360 --> 01:26:53,400
Wouldn't do his new career
in the City much good.

1111
01:26:53,400 --> 01:26:55,880
Oh, God no. You've got to keep his
name out. Thank you.

1112
01:26:55,880 --> 01:26:57,400
THEY LAUGH AND DOORBELL RINGS

1113
01:26:57,400 --> 01:27:00,400
So, filming an advert for Weetabix,
how does that work, then?

1114
01:27:00,400 --> 01:27:03,360
<font color="white">You get the rushes every day,</font>
presumably?! Stop it!

1115
01:27:03,360 --> 01:27:05,440
JOEY LAUGHS
She's a riot.

1116
01:27:05,440 --> 01:27:09,080
No, listen... I think
you've made the right decision.

1117
01:27:09,080 --> 01:27:11,320
I will admit,
I couldn't see it at first,

1118
01:27:11,320 --> 01:27:15,080
but all this post-modern detective
<font color="white">malarkey, you're right.</font>

1119
01:27:15,080 --> 01:27:16,800
It's a young man's game.

1120
01:27:16,800 --> 01:27:20,240
You don't want to get to the point
where you're embarrassing yourself.

1121
01:27:20,240 --> 01:27:21,920
And she'll be good for you.

1122
01:27:21,920 --> 01:27:23,240
Nice choice.

1123
01:27:23,240 --> 01:27:25,560
Thank you.

1124
01:27:25,560 --> 01:27:28,280
From someone called Brad...

1125
01:27:28,280 --> 01:27:31,120
Oh was, was he that guy
<font color="lime">that you, um..?</font>

1126
01:27:35,440 --> 01:27:36,640
"Forgive me, Jonathan,

1127
01:27:36,640 --> 01:27:39,520
"but you'll understand why
I couldn't bear to keep this.

1128
01:27:39,520 --> 01:27:41,600
"Although it may seem ghoulish,

1129
01:27:41,600 --> 01:27:43,240
"I felt you were the one person

1130
01:27:43,240 --> 01:27:46,320
"who would truly appreciate
its finer points."

1131
01:27:46,320 --> 01:27:47,720
Ah.

1132
01:27:47,720 --> 01:27:51,160
<font color="white">So there you go, then. A little</font>
toy for you to play with.

1133
01:27:51,160 --> 01:27:53,280
CHAINSAW AND JOEY LAUGHS

1134
01:27:53,280 --> 01:27:55,720
So where did you first meet this
character anyway?

1135
01:27:55,720 --> 01:27:57,760
At a miserable bastards convention?

1136
01:27:57,760 --> 01:28:00,800
Oh, don't! Don't know what you'd be
<font color="white">doing there. </font><font color="lime">That's another story.</font>

1137
01:28:00,800 --> 01:28:02,840
Friend of mine took me to see this
magic show,

1138
01:28:02,840 --> 01:28:06,080
which is just so not my scene.
Oh, I know what you mean.

1139
01:28:06,080 --> 01:28:08,920
It's this weird little world
they all live in, don't they?

1140
01:28:08,920 --> 01:28:11,520
THEY know it's a con,
<font color="white">WE know it's a con,</font>

1141
01:28:11,520 --> 01:28:13,200
they know we know it's a con,

1142
01:28:13,200 --> 01:28:15,880
and at the end of the day, you're
all like, who's fooling who?

1143
01:28:15,880 --> 01:28:17,360
You might want to get out more.

1144
01:28:17,360 --> 01:28:20,080
And here's an idea,
don't be such a dick.

1145
01:28:21,400 --> 01:28:23,840
Oh. Sorry, how was it?

1146
01:28:23,840 --> 01:28:25,360
Did you have any joy?

1147
01:28:26,960 --> 01:28:29,120
<font color="yellow">Sadly not.</font>

1148
01:28:29,120 --> 01:28:31,120
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd


