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00:00:04,758 --> 00:00:07,826
This season on
"The Tournament of All Stars,"
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00:00:07,827 --> 00:00:11,792
18 queens competed
in 3 brackets.
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00:00:11,793 --> 00:00:13,861
And tonight...
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00:00:13,862 --> 00:00:18,274
the top All Stars face off
in the semifinals,
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00:00:18,275 --> 00:00:20,585
as they continue their quest
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00:00:20,586 --> 00:00:24,240
for a coveted spot in
the "Drag Race" Hall of Fame.
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The All Star returning
to the competition is...
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00:00:39,896 --> 00:00:42,102
Good evening.
I'm Rowdy Ru.
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And I'm Rowdy Ru Jr., but
you can call me Little RuRu.
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00:00:45,793 --> 00:00:49,792
Tonight our top queens
of all three brackets
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00:00:49,793 --> 00:00:53,033
are back
for the semifinals of...
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00:00:53,034 --> 00:00:55,895
both:
"The Tournament of All Stars."
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Bring back our semifinalists.
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From Bracket 1...
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00:01:07,793 --> 00:01:10,240
here comes the Dawn
16
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and A'keria C. Davenport.
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Bitch,
we are so fucking back.
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00:01:17,586 --> 00:01:19,240
I think
she's been working out.
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00:01:19,241 --> 00:01:20,930
I kind of chewed up
Bracket 1,
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00:01:20,931 --> 00:01:22,688
spit it out, pissed on it.
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And I'm just here
to do more of the same.
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The semifinals,
they have commenced.
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And, bitch,
I feel cunt about it.
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I have no choice
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but to knock these girls out
one by one.
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And I'm ready.
Bing, bing, bing.
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Oh, well, put that
in your pipe and smoke it.
28
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Mm-hmm.
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00:01:40,965 --> 00:01:42,550
Yeah, she's here.
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00:01:46,413 --> 00:01:50,723
Up next, from Bracket 2,
it's Crystal Methyd...
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00:01:50,724 --> 00:01:54,274
and the reverend doctor,
Silky Nutmeg Ganache.
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00:01:56,793 --> 00:01:59,723
It's Punkie Brewster
all growed up.
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00:01:59,724 --> 00:02:01,895
The circus is back in town,
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and I'm gonna ringlead
these girls to the finals
35
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and that $200,000, period.
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Why, this is the silkiest
Ganache I've ever had.
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I'm not snatching no crown.
I'm here to earn the crown.
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See, there's a difference.
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Some girls have to snatch it
but not Silky Nutmeg Ganache.
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00:02:25,206 --> 00:02:28,930
And from Bracket 3,
it's Kennedy Davenport,
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00:02:28,931 --> 00:02:33,067
Jasmine Kennedie, and Sam Star.
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♪ Don't play no games ♪
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She really needs to start
dressing up
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for these functions.
- Well...
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00:02:38,551 --> 00:02:40,102
I am prepared,
46
00:02:40,103 --> 00:02:43,412
and I am definitely
in competition mode.
47
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It's gonna be
a fight to the finish.
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00:02:45,620 --> 00:02:47,412
The best of the brackets
have returned,
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00:02:47,413 --> 00:02:48,895
and, baby, the game is on.
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You're in a bald hat.
I'm sorry.
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00:02:51,344 --> 00:02:53,516
What are you talking about?
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I'm Little Ruru.
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3 girls from Bracket 3--
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I think that means
we're pretty hot competition.
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00:02:58,827 --> 00:03:00,447
Sorry, girls who
didn't make it through.
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Don't make me get the belt.
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Buckle up, bitches.
Let the games begin.
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Yee-haw.
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00:03:11,965 --> 00:03:15,895
And now, the moment
you've all been waiting for,
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the winner
of the wild-card lottery.
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The comeback queen rejoining
the competition is...
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Gay.
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It's Joey Jay.
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I'm back, back, back again.
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No matter how many times
you go to church,
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00:03:46,586 --> 00:03:49,033
you will never be able
to pray this gay away.
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00:03:49,034 --> 00:03:50,895
Hi, gay.
- Hi, gay.
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00:03:50,896 --> 00:03:53,240
I didn't qualify
with points,
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so I'm sure some
of the girls are like,
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we're not worried about her.
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But the girls have to remember
RuPaul and Michelle chose this.
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So, obviously,
I'm here for a reason.
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Condragulations, All Stars.
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You are one step closer
to the grand prize
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00:04:11,172 --> 00:04:13,412
of $200,000.
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- Oh, my God.
- Okay.
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00:04:14,655 --> 00:04:18,205
Starting today
and for the next two weeks,
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"Tournament of All Stars"
semifinal rules
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00:04:21,379 --> 00:04:22,930
are in full effect.
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First, the points you earned
in the preliminary round
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00:04:27,241 --> 00:04:29,102
have been wiped,
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00:04:29,103 --> 00:04:33,412
so you're all starting
on a level playing field.
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For the next two episodes,
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I will name
one top All Star of the week,
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and she will receive
a cash tip
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of $10,000.
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Then the two bottom All Stars
will lip-sync for their lives.
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But the decision
of who lip-syncs
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will not be mine to make.
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It will be...
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yours.
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00:05:01,068 --> 00:05:03,067
- All right.
- Okay.
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00:05:03,068 --> 00:05:05,412
- Wanted a twist, huh?
- I love you all.
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00:05:05,413 --> 00:05:07,240
Oh, God.
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00:05:07,241 --> 00:05:09,378
After I name
the top All Star,
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00:05:09,379 --> 00:05:11,930
the other queens
will rank each other
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00:05:11,931 --> 00:05:14,412
in a new and improved
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00:05:14,413 --> 00:05:18,136
Rate-A-Queen, the MVQ edition.
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00:05:18,137 --> 00:05:20,964
- Gag.
- Oh, gosh.
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00:05:20,965 --> 00:05:24,895
It's always something.
It's always something.
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00:05:24,896 --> 00:05:26,240
Ugh.
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The two All Stars
that receive the lowest rating
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from their fellow queens
will lip-sync for their lives,
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and one will be eliminated.
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Hmm.
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Gag.
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00:05:39,655 --> 00:05:42,447
Now, let's reignite
this competition.
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00:05:42,448 --> 00:05:44,723
For this week's Maxi Challenge,
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00:05:44,724 --> 00:05:48,412
you are cordially invited
to perform
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at the Tell Me Something Good
story hour.
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Okay.
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Each of you needs
to command the stage
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as you tell
an entertainting story
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that offers a life lesson
to your younger self.
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Okay.
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Now, to help you prepare,
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you'll come
to my storytelling workshop,
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where we will be joined by our
extra-special guest judge--
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actor and comedian
Evan Mulrooney.
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- Ooh.
- Oh, my God.
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- Gorgeous day.
- Come on, Evan.
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All Stars,
start your engines.
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00:06:23,965 --> 00:06:26,516
And may
the best drag queen win.
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Sickening.
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It could still be me.
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Not only are
eliminations back,
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we also have
this Rate-A-Queen situation.
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What's the prize package, again?
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'Cause this is a lot.
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♪ "RuPaul's Drag Race" ♪
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The winner of
"RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars"
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will snatch an official
makeup collaboration
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00:06:47,862 --> 00:06:50,826
with Anastasia Beverly Hills
cosmetics,
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a coveted spot in
the "Drag Race" Hall of Fame,
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and a cash prize of $200,000,
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with our extra-special
guest judge Evan Mulrooney.
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♪ "RuPaul's Drag Race" ♪
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♪ May the best drag queen win,
best drag queen win ♪
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00:07:09,586 --> 00:07:11,033
Well, they did
ask for the boss.
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Okay.
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00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:16,447
- Back, back, back again.
- We have made it back...
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- We're here.
- In this room.
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Come on.
Everyone's in sportswear.
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Bitch.
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This is when the party
is actually getting started.
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I'm so excited to meet the best
of the best of each bracket.
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Oh, my God.
Hey, diva.
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00:07:29,137 --> 00:07:31,999
I think I'm most surprised to
see 4 girls from Bracket 3.
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Can you believe
that 4 of us are here?
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That's crazy.
- No.
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And now that I know
that Rate-A-Queen is here,
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hopefully they like me.
153
00:07:39,103 --> 00:07:41,171
- How many points did you have?
- I got 8.
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Girl, probably
the most of the season.
155
00:07:42,896 --> 00:07:44,757
- Yeah. I think so.
- You was whupping the girls.
156
00:07:44,758 --> 00:07:46,274
Oh, I was whupping
their asses.
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00:07:46,275 --> 00:07:47,895
Oh, you was dog-walking
the girls.
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I mean,
like, a little bit, yeah.
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But doesn't matter now.
- Nope.
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It's an even
fucking playing field.
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Okay.
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I'm not sure if the level
of competition has risen
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or just my blood pressure.
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But I ain't scared.
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Just because me
and Christa got 6
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and some of you other hos
got 7 and 8,
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that don't mean that we ain't
gonna come stomp you.
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- Where are we finna be at?
- I don't know, girl.
169
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Where you want to go?
- I was over here.
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00:08:13,896 --> 00:08:15,826
But Ms. Silky was
already right there,
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so I don't want to be all
the Black girls on one side.
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We can go over there.
Where do you want to go, girl?
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00:08:20,965 --> 00:08:23,654
Well, y'all talking about
that, how's that gonna go?
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- What?
- You and Silk.
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00:08:25,103 --> 00:08:27,343
- It has to go nowhere.
- It has to go nowhere.
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00:08:27,344 --> 00:08:28,999
Unfortunately,
I don't know her.
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Oh.
178
00:08:30,068 --> 00:08:32,481
Everybody knows
that me and Silky
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had a friendship
that was very deeply rooted.
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But there's been
no communication
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00:08:37,068 --> 00:08:38,964
between the two of us
for over a year now.
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And some things
have transpired off camera
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that has now put me
in a position
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00:08:44,068 --> 00:08:46,274
where I can't even
acknowledge her.
185
00:08:46,275 --> 00:08:49,033
Where's my stuff?
186
00:08:49,034 --> 00:08:51,723
Ooh, there's too many
strong men around here
187
00:08:51,724 --> 00:08:53,999
for me to carry my own things.
- Okay.
188
00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:56,412
Coming into semifinals,
I feel very confident
189
00:08:56,413 --> 00:08:57,723
in going all the way.
190
00:08:57,724 --> 00:09:01,309
I am so happy with what
I delivered in my bracket.
191
00:09:01,310 --> 00:09:02,792
Oh, girl...
192
00:09:02,793 --> 00:09:04,792
As if life wasn't
already hard.
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00:09:04,793 --> 00:09:08,378
And I am very proud
to see A'keria here.
194
00:09:08,379 --> 00:09:10,343
That's my family.
She's my niece.
195
00:09:10,344 --> 00:09:13,274
The Davenport dynasty
is together.
196
00:09:13,275 --> 00:09:14,343
Yes, ma'am.
197
00:09:14,344 --> 00:09:15,861
And with this Rate-A-Queen,
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00:09:15,862 --> 00:09:20,792
having somebody that I know
have my back in the Werk Room
199
00:09:20,793 --> 00:09:23,171
is, like, top-tier.
200
00:09:23,172 --> 00:09:24,240
You come over here with us,
201
00:09:24,241 --> 00:09:25,619
you come over here
with the veterans.
202
00:09:25,620 --> 00:09:27,826
This rule format--
I'm expecting everyone here
203
00:09:27,827 --> 00:09:29,757
to act a damn fool
the whole time.
204
00:09:29,758 --> 00:09:31,378
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
- What does that mean?
205
00:09:31,379 --> 00:09:32,585
Playing games,
206
00:09:32,586 --> 00:09:33,999
lying, scheming.
- Yeah, yeah.
207
00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:35,757
Coming back
to the semifinals,
208
00:09:35,758 --> 00:09:37,895
I thought this was
good old-fashioned
209
00:09:37,896 --> 00:09:39,343
standard classic "Drag Race."
210
00:09:39,344 --> 00:09:41,654
Show your pretty dresses,
and, you know,
211
00:09:41,655 --> 00:09:44,102
the judges will decide.
212
00:09:44,103 --> 00:09:47,343
Now this is a game
of social-strategy warfare.
213
00:09:47,344 --> 00:09:49,964
Ooh, look at our tour sisters
back together.
214
00:09:49,965 --> 00:09:51,516
- Yay.
- Oh, my God.
215
00:09:51,517 --> 00:09:53,067
- Family.
- We did tour together.
216
00:09:53,068 --> 00:09:55,585
We all did.
We had all 36 states together.
217
00:09:55,586 --> 00:09:57,550
- And now we're competing.
- I know.
218
00:09:57,551 --> 00:09:59,068
But maybe, you know...
219
00:10:01,482 --> 00:10:04,550
You know, the Rate-A-Queen
is very interesting.
220
00:10:04,551 --> 00:10:06,481
In my preliminary round,
221
00:10:06,482 --> 00:10:09,862
my social aspect of the game
wasn't the best.
222
00:10:12,034 --> 00:10:13,274
Obviously.
223
00:10:13,275 --> 00:10:14,585
I put April.
224
00:10:14,586 --> 00:10:16,826
Silky got me good.
225
00:10:16,827 --> 00:10:18,447
So, in the semifinals,
226
00:10:18,448 --> 00:10:21,240
I'm not gonna count
on anyone looking out for me.
227
00:10:21,241 --> 00:10:22,930
- I'm a little gagged.
- Gagged.
228
00:10:22,931 --> 00:10:24,895
'Cause that means
everyone has an opinion now.
229
00:10:24,896 --> 00:10:26,171
I know.
230
00:10:26,172 --> 00:10:27,999
We all usually do.
231
00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:29,343
This is gaggy,
232
00:10:29,344 --> 00:10:31,585
'cause we control
the girls in the bottom now.
233
00:10:31,586 --> 00:10:33,481
You're blocking
my camera, bitch.
234
00:10:33,482 --> 00:10:34,895
Then move.
Find another one.
235
00:10:34,896 --> 00:10:36,412
You move,
you little feather duster.
236
00:10:36,413 --> 00:10:38,550
Oh, I love rating.
Yeah, I'm professional, baby.
237
00:10:38,551 --> 00:10:39,757
I rate queens every day.
238
00:10:39,758 --> 00:10:42,895
Honey, I look at them
and go, trash, horrible.
239
00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:45,792
Jasmine,
you can shut the fuck up.
240
00:10:45,793 --> 00:10:47,757
No. Did I shut up
the first time?
241
00:10:47,758 --> 00:10:49,619
- You'll learn.
- No, I don't think I will.
242
00:10:49,620 --> 00:10:51,274
I don't think
you will either, girl.
243
00:10:51,275 --> 00:10:52,757
Put a cork in it, girl.
244
00:10:52,758 --> 00:10:54,378
It gets a little
nerve-racking just in general
245
00:10:54,379 --> 00:10:55,792
because it's a social game.
246
00:10:55,793 --> 00:10:58,550
So maybe I should shut up.
247
00:10:58,551 --> 00:10:59,723
Probably won't.
248
00:10:59,724 --> 00:11:01,757
Now I have to be nice?
249
00:11:01,758 --> 00:11:03,826
Jasmine, go ahead
and get packed, girl.
250
00:11:12,827 --> 00:11:14,343
- Ooh.
- We got to give storyteller.
251
00:11:14,344 --> 00:11:16,240
- Ooh! Oh!
- They choreographed the dance.
252
00:11:16,241 --> 00:11:18,309
It's time
to write our material
253
00:11:18,310 --> 00:11:20,309
for the Tell Me Something Good
story hour.
254
00:11:20,310 --> 00:11:23,274
And I'm ready
to tell a story, bitch--
255
00:11:23,275 --> 00:11:26,757
Dr. Seuss style,
Mother Goose style.
256
00:11:26,758 --> 00:11:29,757
It is my time
to redeem myself...
257
00:11:29,758 --> 00:11:32,343
because the last time
I did a similar challenge,
258
00:11:32,344 --> 00:11:33,861
I was in the bottom.
259
00:11:33,862 --> 00:11:36,067
For this challenge,
you have to be willing
260
00:11:36,068 --> 00:11:38,964
to act a fool,
to be a complete idiot.
261
00:11:38,965 --> 00:11:41,792
And I know that's hard
for you, Sam.
262
00:11:41,793 --> 00:11:43,999
I was definitely too focused
on being perfect.
263
00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:46,895
So, this time,
we're gonna have fun.
264
00:11:46,896 --> 00:11:48,550
I hope.
265
00:11:49,862 --> 00:11:51,792
I'm just hoping
I can impress the girls,
266
00:11:51,793 --> 00:11:54,619
and, you know,
if I'm not in the top,
267
00:11:54,620 --> 00:11:56,516
hopefully the girls don't put
me on the bottom.
268
00:11:56,517 --> 00:11:57,999
You know?
- Right.
269
00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:00,585
The social aspect--
270
00:12:00,586 --> 00:12:02,964
I think
that we have an advantage
271
00:12:02,965 --> 00:12:04,550
because there's four
from our bracket.
272
00:12:04,551 --> 00:12:05,930
I hope we can use that.
273
00:12:05,931 --> 00:12:08,102
Are we going to have
a Bracket 3 alliance?
274
00:12:08,103 --> 00:12:11,619
I hope so, because to have
the majority of the group
275
00:12:11,620 --> 00:12:13,861
have my back--sickening.
276
00:12:13,862 --> 00:12:15,654
No, they're very quiet
over there.
277
00:12:15,655 --> 00:12:16,757
Think they're scheming?
278
00:12:16,758 --> 00:12:18,240
Do you think
they're scheming?
279
00:12:18,241 --> 00:12:19,481
Joey likes to scheme.
280
00:12:19,482 --> 00:12:21,067
I don't know--
Joey was, like, a little snippy
281
00:12:21,068 --> 00:12:22,412
with me during Bracket 3.
282
00:12:22,413 --> 00:12:24,343
And also, too, like,
I am the vibe checker.
283
00:12:24,344 --> 00:12:26,412
And there was something
about her energy.
284
00:12:26,413 --> 00:12:28,240
She was always
maybe a little sly.
285
00:12:28,241 --> 00:12:30,585
So, you know, I definitely have
an eye on her.
286
00:12:30,586 --> 00:12:32,931
- Do you want to scheme?
- What are we scheming about?
287
00:12:34,793 --> 00:12:37,343
Our alliance could be,
like, if you flop,
288
00:12:37,344 --> 00:12:39,585
I won't put you last.
289
00:12:39,586 --> 00:12:41,585
Jasmine is probably
the girl in the room
290
00:12:41,586 --> 00:12:43,585
that I'm the closest with.
291
00:12:43,586 --> 00:12:45,516
But I'm not very close
with her.
292
00:12:45,517 --> 00:12:47,757
I've met her
maybe two or three times.
293
00:12:47,758 --> 00:12:49,102
We're both from New York.
294
00:12:49,103 --> 00:12:50,826
And I want to have something.
295
00:12:50,827 --> 00:12:53,067
Like, I want to make sure that,
like, someone knows
296
00:12:53,068 --> 00:12:54,585
that, like, I'm in their court
297
00:12:54,586 --> 00:12:56,448
so that hopefully
they'll be in my court.
298
00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:01,309
I'm not even gonna lie.
299
00:13:01,310 --> 00:13:03,378
I was supposed to give you
that last point.
300
00:13:03,379 --> 00:13:05,654
And I really beat myself up
for that
301
00:13:05,655 --> 00:13:07,585
because I didn't think
I would make it to the top.
302
00:13:07,586 --> 00:13:09,067
Yeah, I know
where your mind was.
303
00:13:09,068 --> 00:13:11,102
And, you know, I don't want
you to think
304
00:13:11,103 --> 00:13:14,412
that, like, I did that
out of any malice or ill will.
305
00:13:14,413 --> 00:13:16,240
I really did think I was gonna
make it to the top.
306
00:13:16,241 --> 00:13:19,412
We're all here for ourselves,
but, like, I am here for you...
307
00:13:19,413 --> 00:13:20,930
I'm here for you.
308
00:13:20,931 --> 00:13:24,274
In the meantime, until we get
to that last second, you know.
309
00:13:24,275 --> 00:13:27,240
I believe that Silky
really genuinely feels bad.
310
00:13:27,241 --> 00:13:29,274
So I forgive my sister.
311
00:13:29,275 --> 00:13:32,067
Going forward, you know,
I'm not gonna, like,
312
00:13:32,068 --> 00:13:33,930
put all my trust in Silky.
313
00:13:33,931 --> 00:13:37,447
But I think that she will have
my back a little bit more
314
00:13:37,448 --> 00:13:39,723
than she did before,
when it comes to Rate-A-Queen.
315
00:13:39,724 --> 00:13:42,585
All of my challenges
that I've won on "Drag Race"
316
00:13:42,586 --> 00:13:44,895
have been nothing but comedy.
- Mm-hmm.
317
00:13:44,896 --> 00:13:48,516
So I'm thinking about talking
about where it started--
318
00:13:48,517 --> 00:13:51,274
being a class clown--
and just tell some stories
319
00:13:51,275 --> 00:13:53,412
about getting my ass whupped
in school.
320
00:13:53,413 --> 00:13:54,999
- Like, you got bullied?
- No.
321
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:55,999
Oh, your mama beat you?
322
00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:57,585
- Yeah.
- She should.
323
00:13:57,586 --> 00:14:00,688
I feel strong on the stage
with a mic in my hand,
324
00:14:00,689 --> 00:14:03,447
so I'm excited
about this challenge.
325
00:14:03,448 --> 00:14:05,757
This is the opportunity
for us to, like,
326
00:14:05,758 --> 00:14:08,999
just relax
and have fun with it.
327
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:11,274
I'm a very organic speaker.
328
00:14:11,275 --> 00:14:14,033
I don't like to write
a script full out
329
00:14:14,034 --> 00:14:16,999
because what I have written
would ultimately be
330
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:19,481
too rehearsed,
and then I start to fuck up.
331
00:14:19,482 --> 00:14:21,067
I'm nervous.
332
00:14:21,068 --> 00:14:23,792
Do you have funny moments
that you can talk about?
333
00:14:23,793 --> 00:14:25,205
I don't think I'm a comedian,
334
00:14:25,206 --> 00:14:27,240
so I don't know how to say,
you know...
335
00:14:27,241 --> 00:14:29,550
knock, knock, who's there?
336
00:14:31,068 --> 00:14:35,240
Yeah, like,
it's just not my gig.
337
00:14:35,241 --> 00:14:37,619
To tell a story
to my younger self
338
00:14:37,620 --> 00:14:39,619
in hopes that
it will be funny--
339
00:14:39,620 --> 00:14:42,619
it's kind of,
like, ugh, cringey.
340
00:14:42,620 --> 00:14:44,999
But I say whatever comes
to my mind.
341
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:47,723
So it's, like...
it could be funny.
342
00:14:47,724 --> 00:14:50,309
I'm really stuck
on what I want to talk about.
343
00:14:50,310 --> 00:14:52,757
I don't--I don't know.
344
00:14:52,758 --> 00:14:54,240
I don't even know
what to tell you.
345
00:14:54,241 --> 00:14:55,930
What?
Don't eat noodles?
346
00:14:55,931 --> 00:14:58,930
If I could tell
my younger self something...
347
00:14:58,931 --> 00:15:00,792
it'll be, bitch,
brace yourself.
348
00:15:02,620 --> 00:15:04,136
How are you guys?
349
00:15:04,137 --> 00:15:06,412
Oh, thank you so much for
joining us for today's meeting.
350
00:15:06,413 --> 00:15:08,688
Is this the table read?
351
00:15:08,689 --> 00:15:11,205
Yes, this is the table read.
352
00:15:11,206 --> 00:15:13,240
It's time for our table read
353
00:15:13,241 --> 00:15:16,412
with Mama Ru and Evan Mulrooney
354
00:15:16,413 --> 00:15:19,412
for our Tell Me Something Good
storytelling time.
355
00:15:19,413 --> 00:15:21,757
Now, I'm not going
to ask you to tell us
356
00:15:21,758 --> 00:15:25,723
what your story is that you're
gonna do on the main stage.
357
00:15:25,724 --> 00:15:28,309
But I want you
to tell us a story,
358
00:15:28,310 --> 00:15:32,274
and then Evan and I will help
shape that story,
359
00:15:32,275 --> 00:15:36,619
if it needs it,
into a better, tight storyline.
360
00:15:36,620 --> 00:15:39,861
All right, so who wants
to start first?
361
00:15:39,862 --> 00:15:43,792
Now, Jasmine, your first kiss,
your first car,
362
00:15:43,793 --> 00:15:44,964
or your first wig.
363
00:15:44,965 --> 00:15:48,136
Ooh, let's do first kiss.
364
00:15:48,137 --> 00:15:51,136
So there's this man,
like a Matthew McConaughey...
365
00:15:51,137 --> 00:15:52,895
- Okay.
- Very, very rugged.
366
00:15:52,896 --> 00:15:54,171
Yeah.
367
00:15:54,172 --> 00:15:55,930
Always kind of, like,
looking me up and down.
368
00:15:55,931 --> 00:15:57,964
One day, he took me aside,
and, you know--
369
00:15:57,965 --> 00:16:00,274
- Where were you? What--
- I was at church.
370
00:16:00,275 --> 00:16:02,033
Oh, at church.
Uh-huh.
371
00:16:02,034 --> 00:16:04,481
I was sitting there,
you know, on my knees...
372
00:16:07,413 --> 00:16:10,067
Praying that, you know,
one day,
373
00:16:10,068 --> 00:16:12,550
God would give me someone
that could treat me right.
374
00:16:12,551 --> 00:16:15,895
It's already hilarious!
375
00:16:15,896 --> 00:16:18,067
He held me
on the chinny-chin-chin.
376
00:16:18,068 --> 00:16:19,067
Uh-huh.
377
00:16:19,068 --> 00:16:21,033
- And he kissed me...
- Oh, God!
378
00:16:21,034 --> 00:16:22,964
On the cheek as a blessing.
379
00:16:22,965 --> 00:16:24,861
How beautiful.
380
00:16:24,862 --> 00:16:26,654
Girl, RuPaul
is loving my lies
381
00:16:26,655 --> 00:16:27,826
and fables about the priest.
382
00:16:27,827 --> 00:16:30,309
So, if she's giggling
this hard now,
383
00:16:30,310 --> 00:16:32,757
I can't wait to see how she is
when I tell my story.
384
00:16:32,758 --> 00:16:34,895
- And Dawn is back.
- Hi. How are you?
385
00:16:34,896 --> 00:16:36,723
Hi, Dawn.
Did you go back to Brooklyn?
386
00:16:36,724 --> 00:16:38,274
I sure did.
387
00:16:38,275 --> 00:16:40,585
So what was the first thing
you did when you got back home?
388
00:16:40,586 --> 00:16:43,585
Oh, my God. The first thing
I did was, well, went to bed.
389
00:16:43,586 --> 00:16:45,585
And then the second
I woke up,
390
00:16:45,586 --> 00:16:48,861
I was really interested
in feeding my soul.
391
00:16:48,862 --> 00:16:50,412
So I got on Grindr.
392
00:16:53,931 --> 00:16:58,067
I think this challenge
does play to my strengths...
393
00:16:58,068 --> 00:17:01,999
if only just because
I love just say stupid shit.
394
00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:03,585
- I have one question.
- Shoot.
395
00:17:03,586 --> 00:17:05,723
So I'm very long-winded.
396
00:17:05,724 --> 00:17:08,895
And I could tell a story, and
I can add, add, add, add, add.
397
00:17:08,896 --> 00:17:11,930
How do I stay within the lines
but make sure
398
00:17:11,931 --> 00:17:15,309
I keep the punch line and
the three parts of the story?
399
00:17:15,310 --> 00:17:18,757
Child, I can go and tell
what each person wore,
400
00:17:18,758 --> 00:17:21,861
'cause I still remember it,
what they breath smelled like.
401
00:17:21,862 --> 00:17:23,826
But I also be up there
for ten minutes.
402
00:17:23,827 --> 00:17:28,102
I think where people go
astray with storytelling
403
00:17:28,103 --> 00:17:30,585
is starting to talk
about things
404
00:17:30,586 --> 00:17:32,102
that don't add to the story.
405
00:17:32,103 --> 00:17:35,723
Don't go into this rabbit hole
of embellishing things
406
00:17:35,724 --> 00:17:37,861
that don't matter.
- Mm-hmm.
407
00:17:37,862 --> 00:17:40,757
Listening to that advice,
it's very encouraging.
408
00:17:40,758 --> 00:17:43,585
Especially after winning
my how-to challenge
409
00:17:43,586 --> 00:17:46,447
in my preliminary bracket,
I know I can do this.
410
00:17:46,448 --> 00:17:48,412
You know what I want to do?
I want to go around the table.
411
00:17:48,413 --> 00:17:50,826
I want to say,
when you think of A'keria,
412
00:17:50,827 --> 00:17:53,309
what's the first thing
you think of, right?
413
00:17:53,310 --> 00:17:55,999
So this exercise is to give
you an idea of the consensus
414
00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:57,585
of how you make fun
of yourself.
415
00:17:57,586 --> 00:17:59,861
'Cause when I think of A'keria,
I say, ooh, all that ass.
416
00:17:59,862 --> 00:18:01,274
Yeah.
417
00:18:01,275 --> 00:18:03,274
So, A'keria, when you think
of Sam Star, first thing.
418
00:18:03,275 --> 00:18:04,619
- Country.
- Country?
419
00:18:04,620 --> 00:18:07,136
What about you, Jasmine?
- Cousin fucker.
420
00:18:10,275 --> 00:18:13,481
That was one time!
421
00:18:13,482 --> 00:18:15,792
- That's funny, though.
- Write that down.
422
00:18:15,793 --> 00:18:17,240
Jasmine, what do
you think of Joey Jay?
423
00:18:17,241 --> 00:18:20,309
- Chicken feathers.
- Chicken feathers!
424
00:18:20,310 --> 00:18:21,757
That's the first thing
I think of.
425
00:18:21,758 --> 00:18:23,412
- What a bitch.
- All right, all right.
426
00:18:23,413 --> 00:18:25,240
A'keria, what's the first thing
you think of Joey Jay?
427
00:18:25,241 --> 00:18:26,309
Two points.
428
00:18:29,137 --> 00:18:31,240
I'm still here, bitches.
429
00:18:31,241 --> 00:18:34,033
I'm still sitting
with all y'all.
430
00:18:34,034 --> 00:18:35,585
I am a wild card.
431
00:18:35,586 --> 00:18:38,240
So they probably don't see me
as competition.
432
00:18:38,241 --> 00:18:40,757
You know, Joey Jay is gay.
433
00:18:40,758 --> 00:18:42,757
- And dumb.
- And dumb.
434
00:18:42,758 --> 00:18:45,447
Even if you included
a story of how dumb you are,
435
00:18:45,448 --> 00:18:48,136
if the story--
I walked into the club--
436
00:18:48,137 --> 00:18:49,585
And I hit my head.
437
00:18:51,586 --> 00:18:53,378
And you hit your head, yes.
438
00:18:53,379 --> 00:18:55,792
'Cause I walked
into the club.
439
00:18:55,793 --> 00:18:58,930
I have a dumb sense of humor,
440
00:18:58,931 --> 00:19:02,378
which I'm gonna 100% use
that to my advantage.
441
00:19:02,379 --> 00:19:03,757
Everybody's got a notepad.
442
00:19:03,758 --> 00:19:05,723
What have you been writing
in these notepads?
443
00:19:05,724 --> 00:19:07,378
- Love letters.
- Recipes.
444
00:19:07,379 --> 00:19:09,619
- My name.
- I drew a picture of you both.
445
00:19:09,620 --> 00:19:12,171
- Of course you did.
- Thank you.
446
00:19:12,172 --> 00:19:13,585
Of course you did.
447
00:19:13,586 --> 00:19:16,067
Crystal, tell us a great story.
448
00:19:16,068 --> 00:19:18,723
Ooh. Um...
449
00:19:18,724 --> 00:19:20,171
I don't know.
450
00:19:20,172 --> 00:19:23,343
Uh, you know, like, when you
get called on by a teacher
451
00:19:23,344 --> 00:19:25,516
and you're not expecting it,
it's very that.
452
00:19:25,517 --> 00:19:28,585
A story about, I don't know,
your first bicycle.
453
00:19:28,586 --> 00:19:31,412
I'm a visual girl.
I hated English.
454
00:19:31,413 --> 00:19:33,171
I always
hated writing stories.
455
00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:37,102
However, there is no choice
but to meet those expectations
456
00:19:37,103 --> 00:19:38,861
and answer the call.
457
00:19:38,862 --> 00:19:40,861
It was Christmas,
and me and my brother
458
00:19:40,862 --> 00:19:44,102
were both gifted
electrical scooters.
459
00:19:44,103 --> 00:19:46,412
And before I even put
my foot on the pedal,
460
00:19:46,413 --> 00:19:49,205
my brother drove off the curb,
face-planted.
461
00:19:49,206 --> 00:19:51,343
Stands up, face bloody.
462
00:19:51,344 --> 00:19:53,792
And I never rode
the motor scooter ever.
463
00:19:53,793 --> 00:19:55,654
- Wow.
- And I still haven't.
464
00:19:57,758 --> 00:19:59,585
See, where you
went wrong, Crystal...
465
00:20:00,862 --> 00:20:03,067
In terms of storytelling
in general,
466
00:20:03,068 --> 00:20:05,516
we want to have
a place to go, right?
467
00:20:05,517 --> 00:20:08,412
Like, where can you go
from there?
468
00:20:08,413 --> 00:20:10,412
I'm gonna...
469
00:20:10,413 --> 00:20:12,309
Pull something out of my ass.
470
00:20:12,310 --> 00:20:14,723
We're working
an overnight shift tonight.
471
00:20:14,724 --> 00:20:16,136
Good luck...
472
00:20:16,137 --> 00:20:18,102
and don't fuck it up.
473
00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:25,757
- Good mor-ting.
- Oh, my God, Tina Burner.
474
00:20:25,758 --> 00:20:28,171
We're back.
475
00:20:28,172 --> 00:20:30,274
Challenge day.
476
00:20:30,275 --> 00:20:33,895
Today we will tell our
Tell Me Something Good stories
477
00:20:33,896 --> 00:20:35,654
on the main stage.
478
00:20:35,655 --> 00:20:38,412
My whole approach
is making a fool of myself,
479
00:20:38,413 --> 00:20:40,550
which usually runs in my favor.
480
00:20:40,551 --> 00:20:42,481
I'm feeling very good
about this challenge.
481
00:20:42,482 --> 00:20:43,792
I memorized it, so...
482
00:20:43,793 --> 00:20:46,067
Yeah, are you gonna be using
note cards, Silky?
483
00:20:46,068 --> 00:20:47,274
No, I'm not using cards.
484
00:20:47,275 --> 00:20:48,585
- No cards?
- No cards.
485
00:20:48,586 --> 00:20:50,412
Love it.
You, Crystal?
486
00:20:50,413 --> 00:20:52,240
You know,
I'm just gonna wing it.
487
00:20:53,758 --> 00:20:55,999
Child, you know you playing.
488
00:20:56,000 --> 00:20:58,136
Crystal is very calculated.
489
00:20:58,137 --> 00:21:00,550
Sure, she was struggling
in that workshop,
490
00:21:00,551 --> 00:21:05,205
but knowing that old kooky,
conceptual bitch...
491
00:21:05,206 --> 00:21:07,205
baby, I know it's probably
gonna be a good story.
492
00:21:07,206 --> 00:21:08,619
I ain't even gonna lie.
493
00:21:08,620 --> 00:21:13,102
After the workshop with Ru,
I got some more ideas...
494
00:21:13,103 --> 00:21:15,067
- Yeah.
- To spice it up.
495
00:21:15,068 --> 00:21:18,343
I did some changes,
some additions.
496
00:21:18,344 --> 00:21:20,723
- Fucking cousins?
- Exactly.
497
00:21:20,724 --> 00:21:21,895
Got it.
498
00:21:21,896 --> 00:21:23,895
How are you feeling
about Rate-A-Queen?
499
00:21:26,172 --> 00:21:27,481
I don't know.
500
00:21:27,482 --> 00:21:29,826
I think I'm genuinely
just gonna wait and see
501
00:21:29,827 --> 00:21:32,757
who I think didn't do
the best for now.
502
00:21:32,758 --> 00:21:34,205
- Yeah.
- You know what I mean?
503
00:21:34,206 --> 00:21:35,757
I feel like it's so early.
504
00:21:35,758 --> 00:21:39,240
I'd like to think that my
Bracket 3 sisters have my back,
505
00:21:39,241 --> 00:21:42,240
as I would them.
506
00:21:42,241 --> 00:21:44,412
Like, I'm just wondering
if, like, the brackets
507
00:21:44,413 --> 00:21:46,861
are gonna, like, stick
with each other.
508
00:21:46,862 --> 00:21:49,067
Mm-hmm.
I don't know.
509
00:21:49,068 --> 00:21:51,205
- I don't know.
- I haven't talk to them.
510
00:21:51,206 --> 00:21:54,067
But Sam's not giving me
anything to work with.
511
00:21:54,068 --> 00:21:57,757
So, at this point,
it is a mindfuck.
512
00:21:57,758 --> 00:22:00,585
I'm trying to build these bonds
and relationships.
513
00:22:00,586 --> 00:22:03,861
Who would y'all consider
to be your closest friend
514
00:22:03,862 --> 00:22:05,067
here at the moment?
515
00:22:05,068 --> 00:22:06,585
I think...
516
00:22:06,586 --> 00:22:10,171
I have a lot of people
that I'm close to.
517
00:22:10,172 --> 00:22:12,102
Like, I'm friends
with everyone.
518
00:22:12,103 --> 00:22:16,895
Well, I'm close to A'keria
because she's my niece.
519
00:22:16,896 --> 00:22:19,930
Yeah, I mean, I know Silky
and Jasmine the most.
520
00:22:19,931 --> 00:22:21,792
I spent the most time
with them.
521
00:22:21,793 --> 00:22:23,240
How about you, A'keria?
522
00:22:23,241 --> 00:22:25,930
Kennedy. That's the closest
person I'm in here.
523
00:22:25,931 --> 00:22:27,378
And...?
524
00:22:29,482 --> 00:22:30,861
Yeah.
525
00:22:30,862 --> 00:22:32,482
You know,
Jasmine, I realize...
526
00:22:36,275 --> 00:22:39,413
I just don't expect A'keria
to rank me fairly.
527
00:22:43,068 --> 00:22:45,585
But, honestly, I don't have
any words for her any longer,
528
00:22:45,586 --> 00:22:49,171
and it's because of what
she said on social media.
529
00:22:49,172 --> 00:22:51,930
She told everybody
that I was talentless.
530
00:22:51,931 --> 00:22:54,240
She talked
about my weight-loss journey.
531
00:22:54,241 --> 00:22:55,930
She questioned my character,
532
00:22:55,931 --> 00:22:58,585
about me being a good person
and a reverend.
533
00:22:58,586 --> 00:23:01,172
Uh-uh. It just
don't sit well with me.
534
00:23:03,310 --> 00:23:04,550
Mm-hmm.
535
00:23:04,551 --> 00:23:06,067
You have other people,
too, that, you know,
536
00:23:06,068 --> 00:23:08,447
like, are there for you and,
like, will watch out for you,
537
00:23:08,448 --> 00:23:09,964
so...
538
00:23:09,965 --> 00:23:12,067
With this whole
Rate-A-Queen thing,
539
00:23:12,068 --> 00:23:14,343
I'ma try to play it,
for the most part, fairly,
540
00:23:14,344 --> 00:23:18,274
because if I was to do
some shady business,
541
00:23:18,275 --> 00:23:19,723
the girls could find out
542
00:23:19,724 --> 00:23:22,102
and automatically come
for me next week.
543
00:23:22,103 --> 00:23:24,585
I would say
I would probably be closest
544
00:23:24,586 --> 00:23:26,240
to all the Bracket 3 girls,
545
00:23:26,241 --> 00:23:28,067
I mean, just because
we've had so much time
546
00:23:28,068 --> 00:23:29,412
to get to know each other.
547
00:23:29,413 --> 00:23:30,895
- Yes.
- Mm-hmm.
548
00:23:30,896 --> 00:23:32,481
How do you feel like the
points went down in Bracket 3?
549
00:23:32,482 --> 00:23:35,067
I feel like we were
all eager to play the game,
550
00:23:35,068 --> 00:23:36,999
but we didn't have
very many opportunities
551
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:39,412
to be alone with someone,
so, like--
552
00:23:39,413 --> 00:23:41,861
I don't know.
I saw you a couple times.
553
00:23:43,413 --> 00:23:45,240
Well, I'm just saying.
I'm just saying.
554
00:23:45,241 --> 00:23:47,067
You wanted to go there,
we could go there.
555
00:23:47,068 --> 00:23:48,585
I didn't go anywhere, girl.
556
00:23:48,586 --> 00:23:50,999
Vibe change tonight.
557
00:23:51,000 --> 00:23:52,654
Oh, my God, girl.
558
00:23:52,655 --> 00:23:54,861
I was okay with how
the game was played.
559
00:23:54,862 --> 00:23:57,481
I just honestly feel
like I couldn't rely
560
00:23:57,482 --> 00:23:59,240
on anybody at that time.
561
00:23:59,241 --> 00:24:01,309
It seems like y'all have
a lot of drama
562
00:24:01,310 --> 00:24:02,826
in y'all bracket.
563
00:24:02,827 --> 00:24:04,550
We got a little.
564
00:24:04,551 --> 00:24:07,619
Being that this is
my fourth time competing,
565
00:24:07,620 --> 00:24:12,205
I feel like I was put
in the category of a threat
566
00:24:12,206 --> 00:24:13,757
in this tournament.
567
00:24:13,758 --> 00:24:15,309
So, hell, yeah,
that's gonna apply
568
00:24:15,310 --> 00:24:16,654
to the Rate-A-Queen situations,
569
00:24:16,655 --> 00:24:18,999
because now if I don't win
the challenge,
570
00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:20,723
they are gonna use
that opportunity
571
00:24:20,724 --> 00:24:22,033
to put me in the bottom.
572
00:24:22,034 --> 00:24:23,792
My season was the first
that had Rate-A-Queen.
573
00:24:23,793 --> 00:24:25,067
Ooh.
574
00:24:25,068 --> 00:24:27,723
Well, did the cast vote
based on performance,
575
00:24:27,724 --> 00:24:29,550
or did they use
a little bit of strategy?
576
00:24:29,551 --> 00:24:31,033
There were definitely
friendships
577
00:24:31,034 --> 00:24:32,240
taken into account, you know?
578
00:24:32,241 --> 00:24:33,861
It's like, if you've known
someone for years
579
00:24:33,862 --> 00:24:35,481
and they didn't do
a good job,
580
00:24:35,482 --> 00:24:37,067
you're not gonna
put them seventh.
581
00:24:37,068 --> 00:24:39,171
You're gonna put them
fourth or fifth.
582
00:24:39,172 --> 00:24:42,895
So there's definitely, like...
583
00:24:42,896 --> 00:24:45,585
a piece of dread
going into this.
584
00:24:45,586 --> 00:24:47,757
You know, even though me
and Jasmine spoke briefly
585
00:24:47,758 --> 00:24:49,412
about an alliance yesterday,
586
00:24:49,413 --> 00:24:52,585
she has personal relationships
with a bunch of other people.
587
00:24:52,586 --> 00:24:54,205
And then the rest
of these girls--
588
00:24:54,206 --> 00:24:56,550
I can't trust them
as far as I can throw them.
589
00:24:56,551 --> 00:24:58,964
They know that
I tore up Bracket 1.
590
00:24:58,965 --> 00:25:01,861
And if they see a chance
to get me out of here,
591
00:25:01,862 --> 00:25:03,447
I don't think
they wouldn't take it.
592
00:25:17,689 --> 00:25:19,102
♪ Cover girl ♪
593
00:25:19,103 --> 00:25:21,343
♪ Put the bass in your walk ♪
594
00:25:24,172 --> 00:25:25,585
♪ Walk ♪
595
00:25:25,586 --> 00:25:28,826
♪ Cover girl,
put the bass in your walk ♪
596
00:25:28,827 --> 00:25:31,619
♪ Head to toe,
let your whole body talk ♪
597
00:25:31,620 --> 00:25:32,826
Mama.
598
00:25:32,827 --> 00:25:33,930
♪ Cover girl ♪
599
00:25:33,931 --> 00:25:35,447
And what?
600
00:25:35,448 --> 00:25:36,930
Welcome to the main stage
601
00:25:36,931 --> 00:25:40,171
of "RuPaul's Drag Race:
Tournament of All Stars."
602
00:25:40,172 --> 00:25:43,274
Here's the story
of a lovely lady.
603
00:25:43,275 --> 00:25:44,585
It's Michelle Visage.
604
00:25:44,586 --> 00:25:47,930
And that's the way
we all became the Shady bunch.
605
00:25:47,931 --> 00:25:51,378
And Victoria Porkchop Parker
as Alice.
606
00:25:51,379 --> 00:25:53,723
Yes, there's only one.
607
00:25:53,724 --> 00:25:56,550
Style superstar,
Carson Kressley.
608
00:25:56,551 --> 00:25:58,240
Do you like your stories?
609
00:25:58,241 --> 00:26:01,447
Oh, yes, "All My Children,"
"The Bold And The Beautiful."
610
00:26:01,448 --> 00:26:03,688
Is "Passions" still on?
611
00:26:03,689 --> 00:26:05,930
In Slovenia, yeah.
612
00:26:05,931 --> 00:26:08,550
You can't judge a book
by its cover.
613
00:26:08,551 --> 00:26:10,550
It's Evan Mulrooney.
614
00:26:10,551 --> 00:26:13,343
Ru, I'm a lot dumber
than I look.
615
00:26:16,862 --> 00:26:20,585
This week we challenged
our All Stars to entertaint us
616
00:26:20,586 --> 00:26:22,343
with their storytelling.
617
00:26:22,344 --> 00:26:24,447
Tonight on the runway,
category is
618
00:26:24,448 --> 00:26:27,412
Red Carpet Realness.
619
00:26:27,413 --> 00:26:29,654
All Stars, start your engines.
620
00:26:29,655 --> 00:26:33,067
And may
the best drag queen win.
621
00:26:33,068 --> 00:26:34,240
Welcome
622
00:26:34,241 --> 00:26:36,723
to the Tell Me Something Good
story hour.
623
00:26:38,137 --> 00:26:40,999
Welcome, Dawn.
624
00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:43,378
- Come on, Dawn.
- Work, Dawn.
625
00:26:43,379 --> 00:26:45,895
- Doing great, sweetie.
- Good job, Dawn.
626
00:26:45,896 --> 00:26:48,585
Dawn, what words of wisdom
627
00:26:48,586 --> 00:26:51,205
do you have
for your younger self?
628
00:26:51,206 --> 00:26:53,723
I think what I'd want to say
to my younger self
629
00:26:53,724 --> 00:26:55,895
is to always savor
the great times
630
00:26:55,896 --> 00:26:57,688
that you have
with your friends.
631
00:26:57,689 --> 00:27:02,516
Like, this one time,
you are at the beach house
632
00:27:02,517 --> 00:27:04,481
with three
of your best friends--
633
00:27:04,482 --> 00:27:07,619
Amy, Sarah, and Josh,
all right?
634
00:27:07,620 --> 00:27:11,999
It's a beautiful,
tropical, exotic location...
635
00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:13,343
North Carolina.
636
00:27:13,344 --> 00:27:15,067
all:
Ooh.
637
00:27:15,068 --> 00:27:18,861
So I procured some marijuana,
and Sarah brought the pipe.
638
00:27:18,862 --> 00:27:20,447
So we start passing
that shit around.
639
00:27:20,448 --> 00:27:22,964
I look up and see
that Josh is standing
640
00:27:22,965 --> 00:27:26,999
this close to the mirror,
convinced that he is a puppet.
641
00:27:27,000 --> 00:27:29,688
And then Sarah,
she is checking her heart rate,
642
00:27:29,689 --> 00:27:32,274
convinced that it is
1,000 beats per minute.
643
00:27:32,275 --> 00:27:33,999
And then Amy--oh, my God,
644
00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:36,343
Amy comes up to me,
her cute little ass,
645
00:27:36,344 --> 00:27:41,067
and she says, hey, so I think
I'm having trouble breathing,
646
00:27:41,068 --> 00:27:43,654
and I might be choking.
647
00:27:43,655 --> 00:27:46,585
So I called 911.
648
00:27:46,586 --> 00:27:48,136
Yeah.
649
00:27:48,137 --> 00:27:50,412
Hello, 911.
What's your emergency?
650
00:27:50,413 --> 00:27:52,723
And then I said...
651
00:27:52,724 --> 00:27:54,067
help!
652
00:27:54,068 --> 00:27:58,033
My friends are fucking dying!
653
00:27:58,034 --> 00:28:00,274
So the cops are almost
definitely on the way.
654
00:28:00,275 --> 00:28:02,136
- Uh-oh.
- I grabbed that jar of weed.
655
00:28:02,137 --> 00:28:06,585
I'm gonna bury it
in the backyard.
656
00:28:06,586 --> 00:28:09,964
I run to the backyard,
and I start digging.
657
00:28:09,965 --> 00:28:11,550
I bury my little weed.
658
00:28:11,551 --> 00:28:14,205
I get up.
659
00:28:14,206 --> 00:28:18,240
My hands--
they're covered in dirt.
660
00:28:18,241 --> 00:28:21,412
So I decide to start licking
661
00:28:21,413 --> 00:28:24,654
the dirt off of my fingers.
662
00:28:24,655 --> 00:28:25,895
And then...
663
00:28:25,896 --> 00:28:27,412
a knock on the door.
664
00:28:28,862 --> 00:28:31,550
And there standing
in the doorway...
665
00:28:31,551 --> 00:28:33,895
is beach patrol?
666
00:28:33,896 --> 00:28:37,619
Two 21-year-old dudes
with surfboards.
667
00:28:37,620 --> 00:28:40,067
These dudes with surfboards
end up telling us
668
00:28:40,068 --> 00:28:42,481
to maybe not smoke so much
next time,
669
00:28:42,482 --> 00:28:45,585
but that moment has taught me
that I will always go
670
00:28:45,586 --> 00:28:49,033
to the end of the Earth
to protect not just myself
671
00:28:49,034 --> 00:28:51,240
but also all of my friends.
672
00:28:51,241 --> 00:28:52,861
Thank you.
673
00:28:52,862 --> 00:28:55,757
- Yay.
- Work, bitch.
674
00:28:55,758 --> 00:28:59,516
I do like Dawn, but I could
just have used more jokes.
675
00:28:59,517 --> 00:29:01,309
Thank you.
676
00:29:01,310 --> 00:29:03,964
Hey, hey, it's Joey Jay.
677
00:29:03,965 --> 00:29:06,171
Yay, JoJo.
678
00:29:09,689 --> 00:29:14,274
Joey, what words of wisdom do
you have for your younger self?
679
00:29:14,275 --> 00:29:16,757
You're gonna grow up poor.
680
00:29:16,758 --> 00:29:20,619
But after years of hard work,
you will be older.
681
00:29:20,620 --> 00:29:22,930
Let me tell you about my dad.
682
00:29:22,931 --> 00:29:25,723
He was a magician.
683
00:29:30,413 --> 00:29:33,619
He did this one trick where
he disappeared for 34 years,
684
00:29:33,620 --> 00:29:35,655
and we still can't find him.
685
00:29:40,482 --> 00:29:42,067
Come on, Joey.
686
00:29:42,068 --> 00:29:44,895
The winter after I turned 18,
I would sneak out,
687
00:29:44,896 --> 00:29:46,964
and I would steal
my mother's car.
688
00:29:46,965 --> 00:29:48,619
I would pick up my best friend.
689
00:29:48,620 --> 00:29:51,067
We would then drive 84 miles
690
00:29:51,068 --> 00:29:53,274
to go to the club
for chicken night.
691
00:29:53,275 --> 00:29:54,999
That means that it's 18 and up.
692
00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:56,861
I remember it so vividly,
693
00:29:56,862 --> 00:29:59,861
standing there
in a black velour dress.
694
00:29:59,862 --> 00:30:03,757
There she was,
Desiree Matthews.
695
00:30:03,758 --> 00:30:08,550
She voluptuously moved her big
hips and slithered towards me.
696
00:30:08,551 --> 00:30:12,895
Hey, daddy, you ever choke on
a hot dog with a real woman?
697
00:30:20,482 --> 00:30:22,654
Six months later,
I finally come clean to my mom
698
00:30:22,655 --> 00:30:24,723
about the club
and about Desiree.
699
00:30:24,724 --> 00:30:27,309
After grounding me, of course,
she goes, wait a minute.
700
00:30:27,310 --> 00:30:28,654
Des and I were roommates.
701
00:30:28,655 --> 00:30:32,067
She used to change
your diapers.
702
00:30:35,724 --> 00:30:37,171
Holy shit.
703
00:30:37,172 --> 00:30:39,378
I went right to that
very next chicken night.
704
00:30:39,379 --> 00:30:41,654
I swished my little gay ass
up and down the club
705
00:30:41,655 --> 00:30:44,102
and searched for Desiree like
I was on a mission from God.
706
00:30:44,103 --> 00:30:46,723
She sees me
and slithers back over.
707
00:30:46,724 --> 00:30:48,412
Hey, daddy, you ever choke--
708
00:30:48,413 --> 00:30:50,757
And I cut her off
from the same pickup line.
709
00:30:50,758 --> 00:30:53,723
I pull out a picture, and I go,
do you know this woman?
710
00:30:53,724 --> 00:30:55,309
That's Mom.
711
00:30:55,310 --> 00:30:59,412
She says to me, oh, my gosh,
I will take good care of you.
712
00:30:59,413 --> 00:31:01,033
Fast forward a year.
713
00:31:01,034 --> 00:31:04,102
And she's like, Joey,
you have the face for drag.
714
00:31:04,103 --> 00:31:06,757
So a couple shots of whiskey
later, I started painting.
715
00:31:06,758 --> 00:31:09,103
Maybe this is my calling.
716
00:31:14,103 --> 00:31:15,999
Being the first
openly gay contestant
717
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:18,067
on "RuPaul's Drag Race"...
718
00:31:21,758 --> 00:31:25,965
Has opened so many doors
for me, front and back.
719
00:31:30,655 --> 00:31:33,550
So, Joey, you don't need
two parents.
720
00:31:33,551 --> 00:31:36,412
You've had a fairy godmother
the entire time.
721
00:31:36,413 --> 00:31:39,412
- Yes.
- Thank you so much.
722
00:31:39,413 --> 00:31:43,723
- Yeah, JoJo!
- Good work, Joey!
723
00:31:43,724 --> 00:31:46,688
That was funny, bitch.
724
00:31:46,689 --> 00:31:49,550
Up next,
welcome Jasmine Kennedie.
725
00:31:49,551 --> 00:31:51,067
Come on, Jasmine.
726
00:31:53,068 --> 00:31:54,895
all: Ooh!
- Damn.
727
00:31:54,896 --> 00:31:56,343
Yes.
728
00:31:56,344 --> 00:31:59,895
Jasmine, what words of wisdom
729
00:31:59,896 --> 00:32:02,102
do you have
for your younger self?
730
00:32:02,103 --> 00:32:03,619
Hey, Kyle...
731
00:32:03,620 --> 00:32:04,792
pay attention.
732
00:32:04,793 --> 00:32:06,274
I'm gonna hold off
on telling you
733
00:32:06,275 --> 00:32:08,585
about the time you came out
as trans on TV,
734
00:32:08,586 --> 00:32:10,240
you iconic little bitch.
735
00:32:10,241 --> 00:32:11,757
But, instead,
I'm gonna tell you
736
00:32:11,758 --> 00:32:13,757
about the very first time
you came out.
737
00:32:13,758 --> 00:32:16,447
I was 15 years old,
living in Binghamton, New York.
738
00:32:16,448 --> 00:32:18,585
Living life as a boy
in Upstate New York,
739
00:32:18,586 --> 00:32:20,343
boys were expected
to play sports.
740
00:32:20,344 --> 00:32:23,723
So I went to every basketball
and football game
741
00:32:23,724 --> 00:32:25,481
in uniform...
742
00:32:25,482 --> 00:32:29,033
as a male cheerleader!
- Yay.
743
00:32:29,034 --> 00:32:31,930
Mom traveled for work,
and Dad would work nights,
744
00:32:31,931 --> 00:32:34,895
so me and my sister, Carly,
had a lot of time alone.
745
00:32:34,896 --> 00:32:38,171
One fateful night, I was
playing with my mom's makeup,
746
00:32:38,172 --> 00:32:40,516
putting on the nastiest
smokey eye in the world.
747
00:32:40,517 --> 00:32:43,240
All of a sudden,
I heard my phone ring.
748
00:32:50,551 --> 00:32:52,067
Hello?
749
00:32:52,068 --> 00:32:53,757
Kyle, where are you?
750
00:32:53,758 --> 00:32:55,412
You're supposed
to be at the school
751
00:32:55,413 --> 00:32:56,964
cheering at a basketball game.
752
00:32:56,965 --> 00:32:59,171
Get here now.
753
00:32:59,172 --> 00:33:02,309
Okay.
754
00:33:02,310 --> 00:33:05,585
Panic ran through my body.
755
00:33:05,586 --> 00:33:07,412
How could I go to school
looking like this?
756
00:33:07,413 --> 00:33:09,861
So I scrubbed my face,
ran down to the school,
757
00:33:09,862 --> 00:33:11,240
and into the gym I went,
758
00:33:11,241 --> 00:33:14,067
until my classmates
started interrogating me.
759
00:33:14,068 --> 00:33:17,412
Kyle, are you wearing makeup?
760
00:33:17,413 --> 00:33:19,861
First of all, rude.
761
00:33:19,862 --> 00:33:21,930
How dare they think
762
00:33:21,931 --> 00:33:24,793
a closeted male cheerleader
would be wearing makeup?
763
00:33:26,724 --> 00:33:29,343
Second of all,
I didn't think I was anymore!
764
00:33:29,344 --> 00:33:31,688
So, after all night
getting interrogated,
765
00:33:31,689 --> 00:33:33,585
it was time for me to go home.
766
00:33:33,586 --> 00:33:36,757
And who do I see?
None other than my mom!
767
00:33:36,758 --> 00:33:39,550
Kyle, are you wearing makeup?
768
00:33:39,551 --> 00:33:41,136
I couldn't hold it anymore.
769
00:33:41,137 --> 00:33:42,723
I snapped.
770
00:33:42,724 --> 00:33:45,585
Yes, Mom, because I'm gay
and I like makeup!
771
00:33:45,586 --> 00:33:48,516
Do you have a problem
with that?
772
00:33:48,517 --> 00:33:49,792
Oh, my God.
773
00:33:49,793 --> 00:33:51,861
My mom stood shocked
for a second,
774
00:33:51,862 --> 00:33:53,585
and then she giggled.
775
00:33:53,586 --> 00:33:55,654
My mom said, it's okay.
776
00:33:55,655 --> 00:33:57,895
I already knew.
777
00:33:57,896 --> 00:33:59,792
What?
778
00:33:59,793 --> 00:34:02,136
How could you have known?
779
00:34:02,137 --> 00:34:05,240
But in that moment,
I was only one thing--
780
00:34:05,241 --> 00:34:06,481
relieved.
781
00:34:06,482 --> 00:34:08,585
I have the best mom
in the world,
782
00:34:08,586 --> 00:34:10,481
and I'm so happy
she accepted me
783
00:34:10,482 --> 00:34:12,309
for who I thought
I was at the time
784
00:34:12,310 --> 00:34:14,930
and still accepts me
for who I am today.
785
00:34:14,931 --> 00:34:17,240
You know, life can be hard,
and it can be scary,
786
00:34:17,241 --> 00:34:19,378
but it's even scarier
to not live your life
787
00:34:19,379 --> 00:34:21,205
as who you were meant to be,
788
00:34:21,206 --> 00:34:22,999
'cause somewhere
out in the world,
789
00:34:23,000 --> 00:34:25,412
there's a Kyle
who just wants the right
790
00:34:25,413 --> 00:34:28,550
and the opportunity
to be a Jasmine.
791
00:34:28,551 --> 00:34:29,964
Thank you.
792
00:34:29,965 --> 00:34:33,792
Good job, Jasmine.
793
00:34:33,793 --> 00:34:36,240
Jasmine's story
is just like her--
794
00:34:36,241 --> 00:34:38,757
a bit melodramatic but sweet.
795
00:34:38,758 --> 00:34:41,412
Yay, Jasmine.
796
00:34:41,413 --> 00:34:43,895
And now Kennedy Davenport.
797
00:34:43,896 --> 00:34:47,412
- Come on, Kennedy.
- Come on, Kennedy.
798
00:34:47,413 --> 00:34:49,205
- Damn.
- Yes.
799
00:34:49,206 --> 00:34:50,792
Welcome, Kennedy.
800
00:34:50,793 --> 00:34:54,688
What do you have to say
to your younger self?
801
00:34:54,689 --> 00:34:57,757
Don't worry, little Ruben.
802
00:34:57,758 --> 00:35:00,240
It gets greater later.
803
00:35:00,241 --> 00:35:03,102
Listen, I was a class clown.
804
00:35:03,103 --> 00:35:05,792
And growing up in the '80s,
805
00:35:05,793 --> 00:35:09,723
we were still getting
our ass whupped in school.
806
00:35:09,724 --> 00:35:11,412
It was this teacher,
807
00:35:11,413 --> 00:35:14,412
and she was
the only person that I knew
808
00:35:14,413 --> 00:35:18,068
that was on a water diet
that never lost any weight.
809
00:35:20,000 --> 00:35:21,205
She couldn't take me.
810
00:35:21,206 --> 00:35:23,309
I would be having
my own conversation
811
00:35:23,310 --> 00:35:25,378
while she was teaching
the class.
812
00:35:25,379 --> 00:35:29,378
And this bitch just put me
in the back of the classroom.
813
00:35:29,379 --> 00:35:30,895
But I was still laughing,
814
00:35:30,896 --> 00:35:33,826
until she just finally got
tired and said,
815
00:35:33,827 --> 00:35:35,585
go to the principal's office.
816
00:35:35,586 --> 00:35:37,309
Now, the principal--
817
00:35:37,310 --> 00:35:40,378
just picture
George Jefferson...
818
00:35:40,379 --> 00:35:42,412
as a woman.
819
00:35:42,413 --> 00:35:44,930
And she had
this Ping-Pong paddle.
820
00:35:44,931 --> 00:35:47,274
And she said, since you want
to act like a little kid,
821
00:35:47,275 --> 00:35:48,964
I'm gonna put you over my knee.
822
00:35:48,965 --> 00:35:50,136
Ooh!
823
00:35:50,137 --> 00:35:52,930
She put me over her knee
and whupped me.
824
00:35:52,931 --> 00:35:54,447
Well, you know what?
825
00:35:54,448 --> 00:35:58,585
The worst thing you can hear
with Mama is,
826
00:35:58,586 --> 00:36:01,171
don't let the people have
to call me.
827
00:36:01,172 --> 00:36:02,861
Y'all know what that means.
- Mm-hmm.
828
00:36:02,862 --> 00:36:05,309
I need y'all help.
Y'all gonna help me?
829
00:36:05,310 --> 00:36:06,550
all:
Yes.
830
00:36:06,551 --> 00:36:09,412
I want y'all
to give me three rings.
831
00:36:09,413 --> 00:36:11,516
all:
Ring, ring, ring.
832
00:36:11,517 --> 00:36:15,033
Hello? Your child
is acting up in school.
833
00:36:15,034 --> 00:36:16,240
Oh, don't worry about it.
834
00:36:16,241 --> 00:36:17,689
I'll be right there
in a minute.
835
00:36:19,551 --> 00:36:21,240
Ooh.
836
00:36:21,241 --> 00:36:22,378
Okay.
837
00:36:22,379 --> 00:36:23,964
Oh, man.
838
00:36:23,965 --> 00:36:25,481
Uh-oh, she got the belt.
839
00:36:25,482 --> 00:36:29,378
He did what, now?
840
00:36:29,379 --> 00:36:30,999
Oh. Oh.
841
00:36:31,000 --> 00:36:33,895
Didn't I tell you--
842
00:36:38,620 --> 00:36:40,240
Shut up!
843
00:36:43,517 --> 00:36:45,343
I said shut up.
844
00:36:47,620 --> 00:36:48,861
- Oh.
- Ooh.
845
00:36:51,275 --> 00:36:53,723
The moral of the story--
846
00:36:53,724 --> 00:36:55,550
it's okay being
the class clown.
847
00:36:55,551 --> 00:36:57,757
You may have gotten your ass
whupped in the '80s,
848
00:36:57,758 --> 00:36:59,481
but it puts you
in a place like this,
849
00:36:59,482 --> 00:37:03,136
where you win all
of the comedy challenges.
850
00:37:05,172 --> 00:37:06,930
Thank you.
851
00:37:09,275 --> 00:37:10,999
Well, now I'm depressed.
852
00:37:20,310 --> 00:37:21,619
Welcome back
853
00:37:21,620 --> 00:37:23,723
to the Tell Me Something Good
story hour.
854
00:37:23,724 --> 00:37:26,136
Our next storyteller is
855
00:37:26,137 --> 00:37:29,550
Silky Nutmeg Ganache.
856
00:37:32,413 --> 00:37:34,171
Silky, Silky, Silky...
857
00:37:34,172 --> 00:37:38,826
what words of wisdom do you
have for your younger self?
858
00:37:38,827 --> 00:37:40,930
You will become
an international star,
859
00:37:40,931 --> 00:37:43,136
and you will owe it
all to the Church.
860
00:37:43,137 --> 00:37:45,516
The little nine-year-old boy
you see,
861
00:37:45,517 --> 00:37:49,447
we called him Big Weegie.
862
00:37:49,448 --> 00:37:52,895
Big Weegie attended
a small, little church
863
00:37:52,896 --> 00:37:54,930
in Moss Point, Mississippi.
864
00:37:54,931 --> 00:37:58,688
At this church, all
the children were in the choir,
865
00:37:58,689 --> 00:38:00,930
and the choir director--
866
00:38:00,931 --> 00:38:04,240
she directed with
a wooden spoon in her hand.
867
00:38:04,241 --> 00:38:05,654
Ooh.
868
00:38:05,655 --> 00:38:07,619
Y'all may know her
as the choir director,
869
00:38:07,620 --> 00:38:09,757
but I knew her as my mama.
870
00:38:09,758 --> 00:38:11,412
- Ooh.
- Okay.
871
00:38:11,413 --> 00:38:14,136
It was one miraculous
choir rehearsal,
872
00:38:14,137 --> 00:38:17,723
and the choir director
came up to me, and she said,
873
00:38:17,724 --> 00:38:20,585
I want you to lead
the choir this Sunday.
874
00:38:20,586 --> 00:38:23,343
And then she took
that wooden spoon
875
00:38:23,344 --> 00:38:25,378
and pressed it
against my little nose,
876
00:38:25,379 --> 00:38:26,861
and she said,
877
00:38:26,862 --> 00:38:29,412
you better not cut up
in front of all these folks
878
00:38:29,413 --> 00:38:31,240
and embarrass me.
- Uh-oh.
879
00:38:31,241 --> 00:38:34,102
Little old me
was just so excited.
880
00:38:34,103 --> 00:38:37,654
I get to lead the choir
for the very first time.
881
00:38:37,655 --> 00:38:39,412
Sunday morning came,
882
00:38:39,413 --> 00:38:42,136
and, baby, I put on
my white Nancy boots.
883
00:38:45,034 --> 00:38:47,067
Yes.
884
00:38:47,068 --> 00:38:49,895
The pastor said, choir...
885
00:38:49,896 --> 00:38:51,688
please come up and sing a song.
886
00:38:51,689 --> 00:38:56,447
I ran to the microphone,
I grabbed it...
887
00:38:56,448 --> 00:38:58,619
I went to the front
of the church, and I said...
888
00:38:58,620 --> 00:39:02,033
♪ Let the church say yeah ♪
889
00:39:02,034 --> 00:39:05,136
The first lady got up,
and she said,
890
00:39:05,137 --> 00:39:07,758
you better praise Him,
Big Weegie.
891
00:39:09,758 --> 00:39:11,826
You would have thought
I was Serena Williams,
892
00:39:11,827 --> 00:39:14,930
the way I crip-walked
all over that church, baby.
893
00:39:14,931 --> 00:39:16,412
I sang, and I danced.
894
00:39:16,413 --> 00:39:19,309
I said, J-J-J-J-J-Jesus.
895
00:39:20,758 --> 00:39:23,895
The Deacon got up,
and he ran around the church.
896
00:39:23,896 --> 00:39:25,619
Oh, he ran.
897
00:39:25,620 --> 00:39:27,826
The spirit was so high, y'all.
898
00:39:27,827 --> 00:39:30,274
And then the Lord
had spoke to me.
899
00:39:30,275 --> 00:39:32,757
I just felt like
I had to tell everybody.
900
00:39:32,758 --> 00:39:36,067
So I had said
in front of the church...
901
00:39:36,068 --> 00:39:37,758
sexual chocolate!
902
00:39:40,551 --> 00:39:42,585
Work!
903
00:39:42,586 --> 00:39:45,412
And when I brought
my head back down,
904
00:39:45,413 --> 00:39:47,378
I saw my mama.
- Uh-oh.
905
00:39:47,379 --> 00:39:50,136
And I knew
she was gonna beat my ass.
906
00:39:50,137 --> 00:39:51,447
Ooh.
907
00:39:51,448 --> 00:39:53,412
I just started to walk
to the back of church.
908
00:39:53,413 --> 00:39:56,205
Sister Pearly stopped me,
and she said,
909
00:39:56,206 --> 00:39:58,447
you are very talented.
910
00:39:58,448 --> 00:40:02,688
Don't let the foolishness
outshine your little light.
911
00:40:02,689 --> 00:40:04,654
And then Sister Pearly
said to me,
912
00:40:04,655 --> 00:40:07,999
yo mama still gonna beat
your ass.
913
00:40:08,000 --> 00:40:09,447
Thank you.
914
00:40:09,448 --> 00:40:11,205
- Whoo.
- Work it.
915
00:40:11,206 --> 00:40:12,654
Good job, baby.
916
00:40:12,655 --> 00:40:15,757
- Let the church say "amen."
- Amen.
917
00:40:15,758 --> 00:40:18,895
Up next,
A'keria C. Davenport.
918
00:40:18,896 --> 00:40:21,895
Okay, sister.
919
00:40:23,793 --> 00:40:25,550
- Yes, ma'am.
- There's the body.
920
00:40:25,551 --> 00:40:29,240
A'keria, what words
of wisdom do you have
921
00:40:29,241 --> 00:40:30,826
for your younger self?
922
00:40:30,827 --> 00:40:33,171
Now, listen,
you may feel alone now,
923
00:40:33,172 --> 00:40:37,550
but one day, you will
definitely be seen and loved.
924
00:40:37,551 --> 00:40:39,757
I was a little bitty kid.
925
00:40:39,758 --> 00:40:41,895
Didn't really have
a lot of friends.
926
00:40:41,896 --> 00:40:43,171
So, when I got older,
927
00:40:43,172 --> 00:40:46,067
pageantry became something
that I felt love in.
928
00:40:46,068 --> 00:40:48,378
I used to do pageants
in dollar-store wigs.
929
00:40:48,379 --> 00:40:50,826
I was gluing rhinestones
to my skin.
930
00:40:50,827 --> 00:40:53,826
I was desperate
to win a pageant.
931
00:40:53,827 --> 00:40:57,240
Needless to say,
I was constantly losing.
932
00:40:57,241 --> 00:40:59,412
I got with my gay mom.
933
00:40:59,413 --> 00:41:02,481
Oh, how I love this lady.
We're on the road one time.
934
00:41:02,482 --> 00:41:04,895
I just did registration
for a pageant.
935
00:41:04,896 --> 00:41:07,964
We're laying across the bed at
this little mozi-wozi motel.
936
00:41:07,965 --> 00:41:09,550
And all of a sudden,
she jumps up.
937
00:41:09,551 --> 00:41:12,516
She says, bitch,
I know what you can do.
938
00:41:12,517 --> 00:41:14,412
You should let me pump you.
- Ooh.
939
00:41:14,413 --> 00:41:16,205
So I'm like,
okay, girl, you know,
940
00:41:16,206 --> 00:41:18,550
so I can get that
voluptuous shape.
941
00:41:18,551 --> 00:41:20,309
We get in the car,
we're driving on down.
942
00:41:20,310 --> 00:41:22,378
I'm thinking we're finna go
to a doctor's office.
943
00:41:22,379 --> 00:41:24,102
And then, boom...
944
00:41:24,103 --> 00:41:26,067
we at the feed store.
945
00:41:26,068 --> 00:41:27,861
Wait, bitch.
This for animals.
946
00:41:27,862 --> 00:41:29,723
What are we doing here?
947
00:41:29,724 --> 00:41:32,067
She said, girl,
I got to get some syringes.
948
00:41:32,068 --> 00:41:34,861
So we're walking.
I look.
949
00:41:34,862 --> 00:41:37,550
There's a rabbit needle.
Okay, not too bad.
950
00:41:37,551 --> 00:41:39,585
Okay, we still walking.
951
00:41:39,586 --> 00:41:42,550
We get to the horse needle.
- Ooh-ooh.
952
00:41:42,551 --> 00:41:44,550
Now, I know I want
to be built like a stallion,
953
00:41:44,551 --> 00:41:46,516
but not that bad, baby.
954
00:41:46,517 --> 00:41:49,067
I get back to the hotel room.
I'm excited.
955
00:41:49,068 --> 00:41:50,895
She said, girl,
you got to go get naked.
956
00:41:50,896 --> 00:41:52,619
So I pull my drawers up.
957
00:41:52,620 --> 00:41:54,826
You know how my briefs--
I was still a boy at that time.
958
00:41:54,827 --> 00:41:57,481
Well, I'm still
a boy now, child.
959
00:41:57,482 --> 00:41:59,067
And she said, girl, you got
to lay on your stomach.
960
00:41:59,068 --> 00:42:01,136
So I laid her on my stomach.
961
00:42:01,137 --> 00:42:03,447
And she said,
I'm going to count to three.
962
00:42:03,448 --> 00:42:06,481
She said, one, two...
963
00:42:06,482 --> 00:42:09,412
By three, the bitch was
already inside of me.
964
00:42:09,413 --> 00:42:11,861
Oh, I wanted to jump up,
but I couldn't,
965
00:42:11,862 --> 00:42:14,171
because she had already
did one side.
966
00:42:14,172 --> 00:42:16,412
I laid my ass on down
and got the other one.
967
00:42:16,413 --> 00:42:19,964
Needless to say,
still lost the pageant.
968
00:42:19,965 --> 00:42:22,550
So moral of the story is,
969
00:42:22,551 --> 00:42:25,412
sometimes you do things
that you'll regret.
970
00:42:25,413 --> 00:42:28,895
But every lesson
is a life lesson.
971
00:42:28,896 --> 00:42:30,930
And I don't live
with any regret.
972
00:42:30,931 --> 00:42:34,412
It is what it is,
and I am who I am today--
973
00:42:34,413 --> 00:42:36,861
fine, healthy, and free.
974
00:42:36,862 --> 00:42:39,240
Thank you.
- Hey.
975
00:42:39,241 --> 00:42:40,688
Come on, A'keria.
976
00:42:42,448 --> 00:42:44,964
Up next, Sam Star.
977
00:42:44,965 --> 00:42:46,619
Yes, Samantha.
978
00:42:50,137 --> 00:42:53,240
Sam, is there anything
you'd like to say
979
00:42:53,241 --> 00:42:55,550
to your younger self?
980
00:42:55,551 --> 00:42:57,688
Little baby Samantha,
981
00:42:57,689 --> 00:43:01,171
you're not gonna have
to serve to serve.
982
00:43:01,172 --> 00:43:04,826
If you couldn't tell
from my outfit or my accent,
983
00:43:04,827 --> 00:43:07,757
I am from all the way down
in Alabama.
984
00:43:07,758 --> 00:43:09,999
And we're known
for many things--
985
00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:12,723
denim, fringe...
986
00:43:12,724 --> 00:43:14,826
cousin fucking.
987
00:43:14,827 --> 00:43:18,412
Shout-out to Cousin Billy.
I love you.
988
00:43:18,413 --> 00:43:21,136
But if you know a lot
about the South,
989
00:43:21,137 --> 00:43:24,999
you know that it's like a damn
religion to be into sports.
990
00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:27,757
And as a little kid,
I wanted to blend in,
991
00:43:27,758 --> 00:43:30,585
and I tried my best
to be like the other boys.
992
00:43:30,586 --> 00:43:33,240
So I said,
why not give sports a try?
993
00:43:33,241 --> 00:43:35,723
My dad was very excited.
994
00:43:35,724 --> 00:43:38,723
The first sport that I wanted
to try out was soccer.
995
00:43:38,724 --> 00:43:40,378
Girl, it was a disaster.
996
00:43:40,379 --> 00:43:43,585
The only thing that I liked
about soccer was my cleats,
997
00:43:43,586 --> 00:43:46,792
because it was kind of like
I was wearing high heels, okay?
998
00:43:46,793 --> 00:43:49,103
Soccer is gonna be strike one.
999
00:43:50,689 --> 00:43:53,240
Damn it!
1000
00:43:53,241 --> 00:43:57,067
Next up, I thought,
let me try out baseball.
1001
00:43:57,068 --> 00:44:00,792
Girl, they always made me
play the outfield.
1002
00:44:00,793 --> 00:44:04,102
I didn't mind, though, because
I did like to braid the grass.
1003
00:44:04,103 --> 00:44:06,826
I also didn't mind the view
I got of Rickey,
1004
00:44:06,827 --> 00:44:09,412
who played second base, 'cause
he had a nice tight ass.
1005
00:44:09,413 --> 00:44:11,930
- Uh-huh.
- Shout-out to you, Ricky.
1006
00:44:11,931 --> 00:44:16,240
So that is gonna have to be
our strike two.
1007
00:44:19,586 --> 00:44:23,240
In middle school, I said,
let me try out tennis.
1008
00:44:23,241 --> 00:44:26,585
The shorts were shorter,
and the boys were cuter.
1009
00:44:26,586 --> 00:44:28,550
My crush Blake played with me.
1010
00:44:28,551 --> 00:44:30,654
But when I found out
he only cared
1011
00:44:30,655 --> 00:44:32,895
about hitting the balls
and not on me,
1012
00:44:32,896 --> 00:44:34,516
I lost interest quickly.
1013
00:44:34,517 --> 00:44:37,136
That's gonna be
our strike three.
1014
00:44:40,241 --> 00:44:41,930
Now, little baby Samantha,
1015
00:44:41,931 --> 00:44:44,171
they're gonna say
that you are not athletic.
1016
00:44:44,172 --> 00:44:45,481
But don't worry, bitch.
1017
00:44:45,482 --> 00:44:48,171
Just wait till you find a wig
and a pair of heels,
1018
00:44:48,172 --> 00:44:49,723
and you're gonna realize
1019
00:44:49,724 --> 00:44:51,723
you're not gonna have
to be great at sports
1020
00:44:51,724 --> 00:44:56,343
to one day become an All Star!
1021
00:44:56,344 --> 00:44:57,964
Thank you!
1022
00:44:57,965 --> 00:45:00,447
Samantha.
1023
00:45:00,448 --> 00:45:01,861
Yee-haw.
1024
00:45:01,862 --> 00:45:04,826
Welcome to the stage
Crystal Methyd.
1025
00:45:04,827 --> 00:45:07,861
- Come on, Crystal.
- All right, Crystal.
1026
00:45:07,862 --> 00:45:09,447
Whoo-whoo.
1027
00:45:09,448 --> 00:45:13,274
Crystal, words of wisdom
for your younger self?
1028
00:45:13,275 --> 00:45:15,930
Ahoy, little sailor.
1029
00:45:15,931 --> 00:45:19,585
Let me tell you,
life ain't all calm waters.
1030
00:45:19,586 --> 00:45:22,412
It's a voyage full of mutiny,
1031
00:45:22,413 --> 00:45:24,826
strange ports, and sea beasts.
1032
00:45:26,000 --> 00:45:29,792
It's 1997.
I'm only six years old.
1033
00:45:29,793 --> 00:45:33,930
And my family's just set sail
from sunny California
1034
00:45:33,931 --> 00:45:37,274
and dropped anchor
in Ozark, Missouri.
1035
00:45:37,275 --> 00:45:39,757
I was super anxious
about starting school.
1036
00:45:39,758 --> 00:45:42,102
My mom introduced me
to our neighbor Danny,
1037
00:45:42,103 --> 00:45:45,378
who was a fifth grader
with brown hair and freckles--
1038
00:45:45,379 --> 00:45:48,343
totally my type at the time.
1039
00:45:48,344 --> 00:45:50,274
And the rules were simple.
1040
00:45:50,275 --> 00:45:52,585
When Danny gets on the bus,
you get on.
1041
00:45:52,586 --> 00:45:55,205
And when Danny gets off,
you get off.
1042
00:45:55,206 --> 00:45:59,309
Well, on this particular day,
Danny didn't get on the bus.
1043
00:45:59,310 --> 00:46:01,309
He was probably doing
something sporty,
1044
00:46:01,310 --> 00:46:03,654
like football or wrestling.
1045
00:46:03,655 --> 00:46:06,136
And as I fantasized
about all the cute costumes
1046
00:46:06,137 --> 00:46:07,895
Danny might be wearing,
1047
00:46:07,896 --> 00:46:11,447
Bob, the bus driver,
started on our route home.
1048
00:46:11,448 --> 00:46:13,343
I played with my little
friendship bracelet
1049
00:46:13,344 --> 00:46:16,136
that I'd given myself
as I stared out the window,
1050
00:46:16,137 --> 00:46:19,585
when, suddenly,
my house sailed by.
1051
00:46:19,586 --> 00:46:23,654
The only safe harbor that
I knew, gone in an instant.
1052
00:46:23,655 --> 00:46:25,585
So there I am,
1053
00:46:25,586 --> 00:46:29,171
a city girl from California
in misery,
1054
00:46:29,172 --> 00:46:31,102
going to who-knows-where.
1055
00:46:31,103 --> 00:46:34,171
Should I say something to Bob?
What would I even say?
1056
00:46:34,172 --> 00:46:35,516
I'm only six.
1057
00:46:35,517 --> 00:46:38,240
Who am I to criticize this man
on how to do his job?
1058
00:46:38,241 --> 00:46:40,585
So I clung to my backpack,
1059
00:46:40,586 --> 00:46:43,067
and I watched
as every single child
1060
00:46:43,068 --> 00:46:45,067
got dropped off home safe.
1061
00:46:45,068 --> 00:46:47,964
And I rode until the bus
went back to the bus depot.
1062
00:46:47,965 --> 00:46:49,550
Oh.
1063
00:46:49,551 --> 00:46:51,723
I thought, well,
this is where I'm gonna live
1064
00:46:51,724 --> 00:46:54,102
the rest of my life.
1065
00:46:54,103 --> 00:46:56,999
I started going through
my backpack for rations.
1066
00:46:57,000 --> 00:46:59,067
Score!
A granola bar.
1067
00:46:59,068 --> 00:47:01,309
We're eating good tonight.
1068
00:47:01,310 --> 00:47:04,309
As I laid out all my supplies
on the seat,
1069
00:47:04,310 --> 00:47:07,654
I was totally unaware
of Bob doing final rounds,
1070
00:47:07,655 --> 00:47:09,619
when he looked down at me.
1071
00:47:09,620 --> 00:47:11,343
Well, shit, he said.
1072
00:47:11,344 --> 00:47:15,585
So Bob, my personal chauffeur,
drove me home.
1073
00:47:15,586 --> 00:47:20,033
Needless to say, my mom never
let me ride the bus again.
1074
00:47:20,034 --> 00:47:22,723
Now, little Cody, in life,
1075
00:47:22,724 --> 00:47:25,205
you are going to go
through difficult situations
1076
00:47:25,206 --> 00:47:26,550
and feel lost.
1077
00:47:26,551 --> 00:47:28,067
You're gonna learn
the importance
1078
00:47:28,068 --> 00:47:31,067
of using your voice
so you are not left adrift.
1079
00:47:31,068 --> 00:47:32,412
Thank you.
1080
00:47:32,413 --> 00:47:35,723
- Yay.
- Whoo.
1081
00:47:35,724 --> 00:47:38,343
She's a land ho.
1082
00:47:38,344 --> 00:47:40,723
♪ Mother of the house ♪
1083
00:47:40,724 --> 00:47:43,481
Category is
Red Carpet Realness.
1084
00:47:43,482 --> 00:47:45,930
Up first, Dawn.
1085
00:47:45,931 --> 00:47:47,861
This is how they do it
on Mars.
1086
00:47:47,862 --> 00:47:51,067
This dress is an homage
to my Emmys red carpet,
1087
00:47:51,068 --> 00:47:53,102
the first red carpet
I ever walked.
1088
00:47:53,103 --> 00:47:55,550
I wore the same color--
seafoam.
1089
00:47:55,551 --> 00:47:58,274
She has me sea-foaming
at the mouth.
1090
00:47:58,275 --> 00:48:01,619
I am cinched within an inch
of my fucking life.
1091
00:48:01,620 --> 00:48:04,723
I literally can't breathe.
My tits look amazing.
1092
00:48:04,724 --> 00:48:07,516
And I have elf ears on.
Duh.
1093
00:48:07,517 --> 00:48:09,033
I feel good.
1094
00:48:09,034 --> 00:48:10,999
♪ Bitch, get back
when I step on the runway ♪
1095
00:48:11,000 --> 00:48:12,619
Silky Nutmeg Ganache.
1096
00:48:12,620 --> 00:48:14,274
Oh.
1097
00:48:14,275 --> 00:48:17,171
Honey, that's sexual chocolate.
- Okay.
1098
00:48:17,172 --> 00:48:18,309
Yes.
1099
00:48:18,310 --> 00:48:20,619
Baby, I don't do
spooky dookie,
1100
00:48:20,620 --> 00:48:22,723
but if I did,
this is how it would look--
1101
00:48:22,724 --> 00:48:25,136
a black gothic swan.
1102
00:48:25,137 --> 00:48:28,412
The titties hurt.
The waist, cinched.
1103
00:48:28,413 --> 00:48:29,826
And, baby, look at this hair.
1104
00:48:29,827 --> 00:48:31,550
It's a showstopper.
1105
00:48:31,551 --> 00:48:33,516
♪ Mother of the house ♪
1106
00:48:33,517 --> 00:48:35,585
Crystal Methyd.
1107
00:48:35,586 --> 00:48:37,136
Ooh.
- Ooh.
1108
00:48:37,137 --> 00:48:39,688
Her insane clown pussy
is on fire.
1109
00:48:39,689 --> 00:48:40,826
It is.
1110
00:48:40,827 --> 00:48:43,033
I don't usually wear gowns,
1111
00:48:43,034 --> 00:48:47,067
so I am wearing
a high-fashion '60s clown car
1112
00:48:47,068 --> 00:48:48,757
menswear-inspired suit.
1113
00:48:48,758 --> 00:48:51,412
My butt looks
so good in these pants.
1114
00:48:51,413 --> 00:48:54,757
Everything is tailored
to perfection.
1115
00:48:54,758 --> 00:48:58,481
You know what?
Mama gives good headpiece.
1116
00:48:58,482 --> 00:49:01,136
I would bell-bottom for her.
1117
00:49:03,310 --> 00:49:05,274
Kennedy Davenport.
1118
00:49:05,275 --> 00:49:08,240
The higher the hair,
the closer to menopause.
1119
00:49:08,241 --> 00:49:10,412
That is a fact.
1120
00:49:10,413 --> 00:49:13,930
Red Carpet Realness is one
of my favorite categories,
1121
00:49:13,931 --> 00:49:16,757
because I get
to be beautiful, opulent,
1122
00:49:16,758 --> 00:49:19,585
and feel rich, when I'm not.
1123
00:49:21,068 --> 00:49:22,895
Get a load of that peach.
1124
00:49:22,896 --> 00:49:26,550
I've lost a little weight,
so I am in this gown.
1125
00:49:26,551 --> 00:49:29,378
And, baby, my heart
is talking to Jesus, okay?
1126
00:49:29,379 --> 00:49:31,792
♪ Bitch, get back
when I step on the runway ♪
1127
00:49:31,793 --> 00:49:34,033
A'keria C. Davenport.
1128
00:49:34,034 --> 00:49:36,895
Is that a peacock,
or is she just happy to see us?
1129
00:49:36,896 --> 00:49:38,999
This is a work of art.
1130
00:49:39,000 --> 00:49:43,033
This is one of my favorite
dresses I've ever made.
1131
00:49:43,034 --> 00:49:46,481
I am completely shining
from head to toe.
1132
00:49:46,482 --> 00:49:49,930
Every petal has
its own reflective rhinestone.
1133
00:49:49,931 --> 00:49:53,067
I have my 20-inch liquid
beaded fringe for my arm.
1134
00:49:53,068 --> 00:49:55,378
This looks very light.
1135
00:49:55,379 --> 00:49:59,033
I know Ru is asking
for this dress on the inside.
1136
00:49:59,034 --> 00:50:00,999
You can have it for 200,000.
1137
00:50:01,000 --> 00:50:02,550
And the bead goes on.
1138
00:50:02,551 --> 00:50:04,412
♪ Mother of the house ♪
1139
00:50:04,413 --> 00:50:09,378
The first homosexual to ever
grace our stage, Joey Jay.
1140
00:50:09,379 --> 00:50:11,412
- Well, the first openly.
- That's right.
1141
00:50:11,413 --> 00:50:12,999
A pioneer.
1142
00:50:13,000 --> 00:50:17,378
I am wearing
a crystal-dripping gown
1143
00:50:17,379 --> 00:50:19,378
with gold detailing.
1144
00:50:19,379 --> 00:50:21,309
Just your average Joe.
1145
00:50:21,310 --> 00:50:23,861
I'm not just attending
an awards show.
1146
00:50:23,862 --> 00:50:26,654
I've just accepted 18 Oscars.
1147
00:50:26,655 --> 00:50:28,136
I feel good, bitch.
1148
00:50:28,137 --> 00:50:30,516
♪ Bitch, get back
when I step on the runway ♪
1149
00:50:30,517 --> 00:50:32,309
Sham Shtar.
1150
00:50:32,310 --> 00:50:34,930
I wonder what Sam's cousin
will think of this.
1151
00:50:34,931 --> 00:50:38,033
Girl, I'm giving
old-school red carpet puss.
1152
00:50:38,034 --> 00:50:39,999
I'm giving you
big blonde updo.
1153
00:50:40,000 --> 00:50:42,826
But the best part
of the outfit--
1154
00:50:42,827 --> 00:50:44,964
I have heels on my tits,
1155
00:50:44,965 --> 00:50:47,412
heels on my hips,
matching heels on.
1156
00:50:47,413 --> 00:50:49,723
Yes, this bitch is pumped.
1157
00:50:49,724 --> 00:50:52,136
I wonder if she used
a horse needle.
1158
00:50:52,137 --> 00:50:53,723
Yes.
1159
00:50:53,724 --> 00:50:55,654
♪ Mother of the house ♪
1160
00:50:55,655 --> 00:50:57,205
Jasmine Kennedie.
1161
00:50:57,206 --> 00:51:01,136
Now, that looks like a woman
who can fix my credit score.
1162
00:51:01,137 --> 00:51:02,585
Locks.
1163
00:51:02,586 --> 00:51:04,826
That's what I'm giving
with this runway--money.
1164
00:51:04,827 --> 00:51:07,102
I have my beautiful chignon
1165
00:51:07,103 --> 00:51:08,585
with my little waves
in the front
1166
00:51:08,586 --> 00:51:12,861
and streaks of navy blue
and my red lip and red pumps.
1167
00:51:12,862 --> 00:51:15,723
She's certainly giving me
Old Holly-wood.
1168
00:51:15,724 --> 00:51:18,067
Oh.
1169
00:51:26,068 --> 00:51:27,757
Welcome, queens.
1170
00:51:27,758 --> 00:51:32,067
"Tournament of All Star" rules
are in full effect.
1171
00:51:32,068 --> 00:51:35,999
Tonight I'll name the one
top All Star of the week,
1172
00:51:36,000 --> 00:51:40,033
who will receive
a cash tip of $10,000.
1173
00:51:40,034 --> 00:51:43,067
Then the rest of you
will Rate-A-Queen
1174
00:51:43,068 --> 00:51:47,585
to determine the bottom two
All Stars of the week.
1175
00:51:47,586 --> 00:51:49,757
Those two will lip-sync
for their lives,
1176
00:51:49,758 --> 00:51:54,309
and one All Star
will be eliminated.
1177
00:51:54,310 --> 00:51:57,136
Now it's time
for the judges' critiques,
1178
00:51:57,137 --> 00:52:00,274
starting with Dawn.
1179
00:52:00,275 --> 00:52:02,240
When I got high
for the first time in my life,
1180
00:52:02,241 --> 00:52:03,964
I also called
the police on myself.
1181
00:52:03,965 --> 00:52:05,619
But instead
of hiding the evidence,
1182
00:52:05,620 --> 00:52:07,792
I told the cops that I got
the weed from my mom,
1183
00:52:07,793 --> 00:52:08,964
which was true.
1184
00:52:08,965 --> 00:52:10,619
One thing I would say
about the story is,
1185
00:52:10,620 --> 00:52:12,757
I wanted to see
a little bit more embellishing
1186
00:52:12,758 --> 00:52:14,378
about your friends,
who the dealer was,
1187
00:52:14,379 --> 00:52:15,550
where you got the weed from.
1188
00:52:15,551 --> 00:52:17,412
It was my dad.
1189
00:52:17,413 --> 00:52:18,585
See, kismet.
1190
00:52:18,586 --> 00:52:21,067
It did wander
a little bit for me.
1191
00:52:21,068 --> 00:52:22,550
My recommendation
to everybody is,
1192
00:52:22,551 --> 00:52:25,205
if you can get there quicker,
do it.
1193
00:52:25,206 --> 00:52:27,102
This look...
1194
00:52:27,103 --> 00:52:29,274
it's unbelievably good.
1195
00:52:29,275 --> 00:52:31,585
I love how it's architectural.
1196
00:52:31,586 --> 00:52:33,585
And it just kind of swoops
and wraps around
1197
00:52:33,586 --> 00:52:35,136
and makes you look
10 feet tall.
1198
00:52:35,137 --> 00:52:37,999
Dawn, you always know
how to pull yourself together.
1199
00:52:38,000 --> 00:52:40,792
You have quite the eye.
1200
00:52:40,793 --> 00:52:43,619
Up next, Silky Nutmeg Ganache.
1201
00:52:43,620 --> 00:52:44,723
This look--
1202
00:52:44,724 --> 00:52:46,930
ooh, come on,
"Ebony" Fashion Fair.
1203
00:52:46,931 --> 00:52:49,378
Sexual chocolate.
1204
00:52:49,379 --> 00:52:50,723
Gorgeous.
1205
00:52:50,724 --> 00:52:53,171
Now, you better preach,
Pastor,
1206
00:52:53,172 --> 00:52:56,930
because I was so engrossed
in your storytelling.
1207
00:52:56,931 --> 00:52:59,067
Y'all may know her
as the choir director,
1208
00:52:59,068 --> 00:53:01,136
but I knew her as my mama.
1209
00:53:01,137 --> 00:53:05,102
I was very impressed
with how you held back,
1210
00:53:05,103 --> 00:53:08,343
'cause I know, bitch,
you can go on and on and on.
1211
00:53:08,344 --> 00:53:10,999
Up next, Crystal Methyd.
1212
00:53:11,000 --> 00:53:14,033
This look tonight--this is
crazy and it shouldn't work.
1213
00:53:14,034 --> 00:53:16,792
But it's
so beautifully crafted.
1214
00:53:16,793 --> 00:53:18,309
It's just fantastic.
1215
00:53:18,310 --> 00:53:21,688
Yeah, in your story, that
Napoleon look was dynamite.
1216
00:53:21,689 --> 00:53:23,309
It was so fun.
1217
00:53:23,310 --> 00:53:27,033
The wordplay, the misery,
Missouri--so clever.
1218
00:53:27,034 --> 00:53:30,723
A city girl from California
in misery.
1219
00:53:30,724 --> 00:53:33,550
This was so tight and
polished and professional.
1220
00:53:33,551 --> 00:53:36,378
It was so heartfelt and funny
at the same time.
1221
00:53:36,379 --> 00:53:37,895
It was that perfect mixture
1222
00:53:37,896 --> 00:53:42,447
of melancholy
and ridiculousness
1223
00:53:42,448 --> 00:53:44,033
that is Crystal Methyd.
1224
00:53:44,034 --> 00:53:47,205
What did you leave
out of the story?
1225
00:53:47,206 --> 00:53:50,481
That I had started
killing rats for food.
1226
00:53:54,551 --> 00:53:57,067
- Glad you left that out.
- Yeah.
1227
00:53:57,068 --> 00:53:59,481
Up next, Kennedy Davenport.
1228
00:53:59,482 --> 00:54:01,999
Ooh, Kennedy,
there was so much whupping
1229
00:54:02,000 --> 00:54:05,033
going on in that story,
but the characters were funny.
1230
00:54:05,034 --> 00:54:06,999
I don't know necessarily
what the big takeaway
1231
00:54:07,000 --> 00:54:08,274
of the story was,
1232
00:54:08,275 --> 00:54:10,861
but I was scared for my life
1233
00:54:10,862 --> 00:54:12,516
when you came out
as your mother.
1234
00:54:12,517 --> 00:54:16,067
And the commitment
to that switch was awesome.
1235
00:54:16,068 --> 00:54:18,343
You certainly know
how to dress for a red carpet.
1236
00:54:18,344 --> 00:54:20,895
Here, in this outfit,
it's all there--
1237
00:54:20,896 --> 00:54:22,343
beginning, middle, and end.
1238
00:54:22,344 --> 00:54:24,792
And that's what was missing
from your story.
1239
00:54:24,793 --> 00:54:27,378
It wasn't concise enough.
1240
00:54:27,379 --> 00:54:29,723
I would love
for it to have been
1241
00:54:29,724 --> 00:54:32,412
about one very specific time
1242
00:54:32,413 --> 00:54:34,895
that was easier to follow,
you know?
1243
00:54:34,896 --> 00:54:36,067
Yes, ma'am.
1244
00:54:36,068 --> 00:54:39,654
Up next,
A'keria C. Davenport.
1245
00:54:39,655 --> 00:54:41,826
This look tonight is art.
1246
00:54:41,827 --> 00:54:43,205
Who did it?
- I did.
1247
00:54:43,206 --> 00:54:46,895
A'keria,
from every bugle bead
1248
00:54:46,896 --> 00:54:49,895
to every scale,
it's so beautiful.
1249
00:54:49,896 --> 00:54:52,136
It reminds me
of a Mugler dress.
1250
00:54:52,137 --> 00:54:55,826
- Alien.
- Yes, it is extraordinary.
1251
00:54:55,827 --> 00:54:57,343
Thank you.
1252
00:54:57,344 --> 00:55:00,171
I really enjoyed your story.
It was such a unique story.
1253
00:55:00,172 --> 00:55:02,619
I was like, the feed store and
all the different needle sizes.
1254
00:55:02,620 --> 00:55:05,171
There's a rabbit needle.
Okay, not too bad.
1255
00:55:05,172 --> 00:55:08,447
I thought that was just
so interesting.
1256
00:55:08,448 --> 00:55:10,895
But I think
that behind the changing area
1257
00:55:10,896 --> 00:55:12,171
wasn't needed.
1258
00:55:12,172 --> 00:55:13,861
That kind of takes us
out of the moment.
1259
00:55:13,862 --> 00:55:15,792
We're like, where's she going?
What's she doing?
1260
00:55:15,793 --> 00:55:17,378
And that can get you
in trouble.
1261
00:55:17,379 --> 00:55:18,895
You know, it takes
a lot of bravery
1262
00:55:18,896 --> 00:55:20,516
to tell that story
and to be that honest.
1263
00:55:20,517 --> 00:55:21,930
It's really fascinating.
1264
00:55:21,931 --> 00:55:25,550
I think it's a six-part
HBO series, honestly.
1265
00:55:25,551 --> 00:55:28,240
Up next, Joey Jay.
1266
00:55:28,241 --> 00:55:29,619
So your storytelling--
1267
00:55:29,620 --> 00:55:32,757
that gag with
the sound-effect machine...
1268
00:55:32,758 --> 00:55:34,861
we were all hysterical
because of it.
1269
00:55:34,862 --> 00:55:37,343
Your writing is top-notch.
- Thank you.
1270
00:55:37,344 --> 00:55:39,895
And I just think maybe
getting away from the cards
1271
00:55:39,896 --> 00:55:41,757
would have helped a little bit.
1272
00:55:41,758 --> 00:55:43,412
I think having the cue cards
1273
00:55:43,413 --> 00:55:46,309
along with the sound board
was brilliant.
1274
00:55:46,310 --> 00:55:50,481
I loved the idea of, like, the,
like, real coordinated, okay...
1275
00:55:50,482 --> 00:55:53,274
- Yeah, play to your strengths.
- Perfect.
1276
00:55:53,275 --> 00:55:54,688
Keep it stupid, girl.
1277
00:55:54,689 --> 00:55:56,688
I think this look tonight
is gorgeous.
1278
00:55:56,689 --> 00:55:59,378
For me, I would have liked
a black shoe,
1279
00:55:59,379 --> 00:56:01,895
only so it brings out
the chiffon.
1280
00:56:01,896 --> 00:56:04,447
But it's just
really pretty, Joey.
1281
00:56:04,448 --> 00:56:07,274
You know, Joey Jay,
"All Stars" is designed
1282
00:56:07,275 --> 00:56:10,481
to lift up some of the girls
who didn't get to shine before,
1283
00:56:10,482 --> 00:56:12,826
and you are
the perfect example of that,
1284
00:56:12,827 --> 00:56:14,999
and we are all here for it.
1285
00:56:15,000 --> 00:56:17,585
Up next, Sam Star.
1286
00:56:17,586 --> 00:56:19,688
First and foremost, you...
1287
00:56:19,689 --> 00:56:22,550
had me at "cousin fucking."
1288
00:56:22,551 --> 00:56:24,930
I was in.
- Your story was fine.
1289
00:56:24,931 --> 00:56:27,481
I was just craving
a little bit more detail.
1290
00:56:27,482 --> 00:56:29,205
How did football go?
How did soccer go?
1291
00:56:29,206 --> 00:56:31,171
Just make it
more authentic to you.
1292
00:56:31,172 --> 00:56:33,826
I think tonight this is
so fun, this is so quirky--
1293
00:56:33,827 --> 00:56:36,240
the heels that you have
on this dress.
1294
00:56:36,241 --> 00:56:38,964
I think for me,
the length is bothering me.
1295
00:56:38,965 --> 00:56:41,033
I feel like it should be
to the ground
1296
00:56:41,034 --> 00:56:43,309
or a little bit shorter.
1297
00:56:43,310 --> 00:56:45,102
But this color
looks gorgeous on you.
1298
00:56:45,103 --> 00:56:47,861
- Thank you.
- Jasmine Kennedie.
1299
00:56:47,862 --> 00:56:50,930
Your story ended up
being really heartfelt.
1300
00:56:50,931 --> 00:56:53,240
I actually really loved
your performance.
1301
00:56:53,241 --> 00:56:54,861
It felt very theatrical.
1302
00:56:54,862 --> 00:56:56,102
There's a moment
1303
00:56:56,103 --> 00:56:57,895
where you sat down
and answered the phone,
1304
00:56:57,896 --> 00:56:59,550
and it felt
very film noir to me.
1305
00:56:59,551 --> 00:57:00,688
Hello?
1306
00:57:00,689 --> 00:57:03,205
Dial T for trans.
1307
00:57:03,206 --> 00:57:04,447
Yes.
1308
00:57:04,448 --> 00:57:07,688
I charge big bucks
every minute, okay?
1309
00:57:07,689 --> 00:57:10,930
You look like one
of Truman Capote's swans
1310
00:57:10,931 --> 00:57:14,067
who all the other wives hate.
1311
00:57:14,068 --> 00:57:16,378
- They do.
- Hate to love.
1312
00:57:16,379 --> 00:57:18,378
And I loved your story, too.
It was really good.
1313
00:57:18,379 --> 00:57:19,861
Thank you so much.
1314
00:57:19,862 --> 00:57:22,240
Thank you, All Stars.
I think we've heard enough.
1315
00:57:22,241 --> 00:57:23,516
Based on your
1316
00:57:23,517 --> 00:57:26,205
Tell Me Something Good
performances
1317
00:57:26,206 --> 00:57:30,240
and your Red Carpet Realness
runway presentations,
1318
00:57:30,241 --> 00:57:32,240
I've made some decisions.
1319
00:57:35,344 --> 00:57:39,033
Tonight you all captured
our imaginations.
1320
00:57:39,034 --> 00:57:42,826
But the greatest story
ever told was by...
1321
00:57:45,379 --> 00:57:46,895
Crystal Methyd.
1322
00:57:46,896 --> 00:57:48,241
Ah!
1323
00:57:49,827 --> 00:57:51,826
Condragulations.
1324
00:57:51,827 --> 00:57:53,826
You're the top All Star
of the week.
1325
00:57:53,827 --> 00:57:55,067
Thank you so much.
1326
00:57:55,068 --> 00:57:57,757
You've won a cash tip
of $10,000,
1327
00:57:57,758 --> 00:58:00,550
courtesy of Clutch Glue,
1328
00:58:00,551 --> 00:58:02,930
the original fashion glue.
1329
00:58:02,931 --> 00:58:04,274
Love it.
1330
00:58:04,275 --> 00:58:07,343
For the rest of you,
it's time to Rate-A-Queen,
1331
00:58:07,344 --> 00:58:09,654
MVQ edition.
1332
00:58:09,655 --> 00:58:13,343
You'll rank your competitors
from top to bottom.
1333
00:58:13,344 --> 00:58:15,136
And the bottom two
1334
00:58:15,137 --> 00:58:18,412
will lip-sync for their lives.
1335
00:58:18,413 --> 00:58:21,585
So, while you Rate-A-Queen,
1336
00:58:21,586 --> 00:58:25,861
the judges and I will play
dirty charades.
1337
00:58:25,862 --> 00:58:29,067
You may leave the stage.
- Bye.
1338
00:58:34,068 --> 00:58:38,378
It's time for Rate-A-Queen,
and I am terrified, girl.
1339
00:58:38,379 --> 00:58:41,412
We have to rank the queens
from top to bottom
1340
00:58:41,413 --> 00:58:43,033
and that is going to decide
1341
00:58:43,034 --> 00:58:44,688
who is going gonna be
lip-syncing this week.
1342
00:58:44,689 --> 00:58:47,757
I'm so sorry to my sisters
in advance.
1343
00:58:47,758 --> 00:58:49,999
Never thought
I'd see this shit again.
1344
00:58:50,000 --> 00:58:53,240
There's a small part of me that
just wants to be really messy.
1345
00:58:53,241 --> 00:58:57,654
Based on the critiques,
I could be at risk here.
1346
00:58:57,655 --> 00:58:59,757
Yeah, I'm going
full strategy here.
1347
00:58:59,758 --> 00:59:01,688
Okay.
1348
00:59:01,689 --> 00:59:04,309
I'm nervous that the girls
might put me in the bottom
1349
00:59:04,310 --> 00:59:05,792
because I'm the wild card.
1350
00:59:05,793 --> 00:59:08,654
And that could
make me an outsider.
1351
00:59:08,655 --> 00:59:11,412
So let's play the game.
1352
00:59:11,413 --> 00:59:15,274
My number-one MVQ goes
to Kennedy Davenport,
1353
00:59:15,275 --> 00:59:17,240
because I know my ass
isn't gonna lip-sync
1354
00:59:17,241 --> 00:59:20,102
against her tonight if
the girls are gonna be shady.
1355
00:59:20,103 --> 00:59:24,378
My number one, Joey Jay.
Her set was very funny.
1356
00:59:24,379 --> 00:59:26,550
- My number-one MVQ...
- My number-one MVQ...
1357
00:59:26,551 --> 00:59:28,826
Is going to Sam Star.
1358
00:59:28,827 --> 00:59:30,550
Her efforts were shown
all night,
1359
00:59:30,551 --> 00:59:32,964
even though the judges
may not have agreed.
1360
00:59:32,965 --> 00:59:36,067
My number-two MVQ,
Jasmine Kennedie.
1361
00:59:36,068 --> 00:59:38,102
I love how she told her story.
1362
00:59:38,103 --> 00:59:40,585
- My number-two...
- MVQ...
1363
00:59:40,586 --> 00:59:43,585
Joey Jay, 'cause I thought
Joey Jay was gonna win.
1364
00:59:43,586 --> 00:59:47,136
My number-three MVQ,
Sam Star.
1365
00:59:47,137 --> 00:59:49,654
Even though the length
of the dress was god-awful,
1366
00:59:49,655 --> 00:59:50,930
I still think
she looked beautiful.
1367
00:59:50,931 --> 00:59:54,964
My number-three MVQ, A'keria.
1368
00:59:54,965 --> 00:59:58,757
My number-four MVQ,
based on critiques,
1369
00:59:58,758 --> 01:00:00,240
Silky.
1370
01:00:00,241 --> 01:00:04,102
My number-five MVQ,
I'm gonna say Kennedy.
1371
01:00:04,103 --> 01:00:06,240
The one person I would look
out for would be Kennedy.
1372
01:00:06,241 --> 01:00:09,343
But because of her critiques
on the runway,
1373
01:00:09,344 --> 01:00:12,723
I really can't do anything
too obvious with saving her.
1374
01:00:12,724 --> 01:00:14,136
That'll put a target
on my back.
1375
01:00:14,137 --> 01:00:16,930
My number-five MVQ, A'keria.
1376
01:00:16,931 --> 01:00:19,309
She's the one that I'm trying
to edge out of the bottom.
1377
01:00:19,310 --> 01:00:20,757
Even though
I love her to death,
1378
01:00:20,758 --> 01:00:23,067
my number-six MVQ
is gonna be Kennedy.
1379
01:00:23,068 --> 01:00:25,757
This might be
our only opportunity
1380
01:00:25,758 --> 01:00:27,240
to have her in the bottom.
1381
01:00:27,241 --> 01:00:28,688
She's a fierce competitor.
1382
01:00:28,689 --> 01:00:31,412
My number-six MVQ
will go to Dawn.
1383
01:00:31,413 --> 01:00:32,964
I was just underwhelmed.
1384
01:00:32,965 --> 01:00:35,412
My number-six MVQ, Dawn.
1385
01:00:35,413 --> 01:00:38,240
My number-six MVQ,
A'keria,
1386
01:00:38,241 --> 01:00:41,343
because mama had a runaway
out this world.
1387
01:00:41,344 --> 01:00:42,585
But at the same time,
1388
01:00:42,586 --> 01:00:44,378
I didn't laugh one time
during her story.
1389
01:00:44,379 --> 01:00:46,723
And that's the tea.
1390
01:00:46,724 --> 01:00:49,343
That is the tea.
1391
01:00:49,344 --> 01:00:50,964
- And that's...
- The tea.
1392
01:00:50,965 --> 01:00:53,999
- It's the motherfucking tea.
- Wish me luck.
1393
01:00:54,000 --> 01:00:55,343
And that's the tea.
1394
01:00:55,344 --> 01:00:56,689
Shut up.
1395
01:00:59,275 --> 01:01:01,481
Welcome back, All Stars.
1396
01:01:01,482 --> 01:01:04,964
Your fellow queens
have made some decisions.
1397
01:01:08,689 --> 01:01:10,964
Based on
the Rate-A-Queen results,
1398
01:01:10,965 --> 01:01:14,205
the bottom-two All Stars
of the week are...
1399
01:01:19,344 --> 01:01:22,481
Kennedy Davenport...
1400
01:01:22,482 --> 01:01:25,378
and A'keria C. Davenport.
1401
01:01:25,379 --> 01:01:30,240
I'm sorry, my dears, but you
are both up for elimination.
1402
01:01:30,241 --> 01:01:33,516
The rest of you may step
to the back of the stage.
1403
01:01:33,517 --> 01:01:36,412
all:
Thank you.
1404
01:01:36,413 --> 01:01:37,895
I love y'all.
1405
01:01:41,034 --> 01:01:43,378
- I love you.
- I love you, too, bitch.
1406
01:01:45,724 --> 01:01:49,343
Two All Stars
stand before me.
1407
01:01:49,344 --> 01:01:53,654
Ladies, this is your
last chance to impress me
1408
01:01:53,655 --> 01:01:57,482
and save yourself
from elimination.
1409
01:01:59,000 --> 01:02:01,136
The time has come...
1410
01:02:01,137 --> 01:02:03,792
For you to lip-sync
1411
01:02:03,793 --> 01:02:07,274
for... your... life!
1412
01:02:09,103 --> 01:02:12,205
I hate that I have
to lip-sync against my niece
1413
01:02:12,206 --> 01:02:15,447
because it's not gonna be easy
sending her home.
1414
01:02:15,448 --> 01:02:18,550
But the lip sync is mine.
1415
01:02:18,551 --> 01:02:21,240
As Davenports,
we both have an understanding
1416
01:02:21,241 --> 01:02:22,757
of what it is to compete,
1417
01:02:22,758 --> 01:02:24,723
so I'm gonna have
to come twice as hard
1418
01:02:24,724 --> 01:02:26,723
because I know
what she's capable of.
1419
01:02:26,724 --> 01:02:29,136
Ms. Kennedy, I'm going
to throw the kitchen sink
1420
01:02:29,137 --> 01:02:30,343
at your ass tonight.
1421
01:02:30,344 --> 01:02:32,447
Good luck...
1422
01:02:32,448 --> 01:02:35,516
and don't fuck it up.
1423
01:02:46,862 --> 01:02:49,792
♪ All my life ♪
1424
01:02:49,793 --> 01:02:53,826
♪ On a search to find ♪
1425
01:02:53,827 --> 01:02:57,412
♪ The love who'll stay
for eternity ♪
1426
01:02:57,413 --> 01:03:01,171
♪ The heaven sent
to fulfill my needs ♪
1427
01:03:01,172 --> 01:03:04,550
♪ But when I turn around ♪
1428
01:03:04,551 --> 01:03:08,585
♪ Again love
has knocked me down ♪
1429
01:03:08,586 --> 01:03:10,550
♪ My heart got broken ♪
1430
01:03:10,551 --> 01:03:12,792
♪ Oh, it hurt so bad ♪
1431
01:03:12,793 --> 01:03:16,240
♪ I'm sad to say
love wins again ♪
1432
01:03:16,241 --> 01:03:19,447
♪ So I place my heart
under lock and key ♪
1433
01:03:19,448 --> 01:03:20,999
♪ Ooh, yeah ♪
1434
01:03:21,000 --> 01:03:23,516
♪ To take some time
and take care of me ♪
1435
01:03:23,517 --> 01:03:25,792
♪ But I turn around ♪
1436
01:03:25,793 --> 01:03:30,723
♪ And you're standing here ♪
1437
01:03:30,724 --> 01:03:33,654
♪ Standing here ♪
1438
01:03:33,655 --> 01:03:37,895
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
1439
01:03:37,896 --> 01:03:39,619
♪ No, nobody ♪
1440
01:03:39,620 --> 01:03:42,205
♪ No, no, no, no, no, no ♪
1441
01:03:47,413 --> 01:03:49,550
♪ No, no, no
- Come on!
1442
01:03:49,551 --> 01:03:51,378
♪ No, no, no ♪
1443
01:03:51,379 --> 01:03:54,895
♪ No, no, no ♪
1444
01:03:54,896 --> 01:03:56,688
♪ No, no, no, no, no ♪
1445
01:03:56,689 --> 01:03:58,550
♪ No, no, no, no ♪
1446
01:04:05,137 --> 01:04:07,309
♪ Nobody's supposed
to be here ♪
1447
01:04:07,310 --> 01:04:08,343
♪ Yeah ♪
1448
01:04:08,344 --> 01:04:10,654
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
1449
01:04:10,655 --> 01:04:14,274
♪ I've tried it
over and over ♪
1450
01:04:19,586 --> 01:04:21,895
♪ No, no, no ♪
1451
01:04:21,896 --> 01:04:25,585
♪ Nobody's supposed
to be here ♪
1452
01:04:25,586 --> 01:04:28,895
♪ Came along,
and you changed ♪
1453
01:04:28,896 --> 01:04:32,792
♪ Yeah, my heart ♪
1454
01:04:32,793 --> 01:04:35,861
♪ Oh, no, no, no, no, no ♪
1455
01:04:35,862 --> 01:04:40,274
♪ Nobody's supposed
to be here ♪
1456
01:04:40,275 --> 01:04:43,412
♪ Came along and changed ♪
1457
01:04:43,413 --> 01:04:45,585
♪ My mind ♪
1458
01:04:45,586 --> 01:04:46,826
♪ Oh ♪
1459
01:04:53,793 --> 01:04:56,102
Oh, my God.
1460
01:04:58,275 --> 01:05:01,895
Y'all better start
the semifinals, bitch!
1461
01:05:01,896 --> 01:05:04,550
Now that is a lip sync
1462
01:05:04,551 --> 01:05:07,481
for the herstory books.
1463
01:05:07,482 --> 01:05:10,826
All Stars,
I've made my decision.
1464
01:05:18,655 --> 01:05:21,895
A'keria C. Davenport,
shantay, you stay.
1465
01:05:21,896 --> 01:05:23,723
- Thank you.
- Wow.
1466
01:05:29,965 --> 01:05:32,757
A'keria, you may join
the other girls.
1467
01:05:39,448 --> 01:05:40,861
- Good job.
- Thank you.
1468
01:05:40,862 --> 01:05:42,895
Kennedy Davenport,
1469
01:05:42,896 --> 01:05:45,930
you are and will always be
1470
01:05:45,931 --> 01:05:49,033
a legendary queen.
1471
01:05:49,034 --> 01:05:50,585
Now...
1472
01:05:50,586 --> 01:05:53,447
sashay away.
1473
01:05:53,448 --> 01:05:54,516
Thank you.
1474
01:05:56,758 --> 01:05:58,481
- Kennedy.
- I love you, Kennedy.
1475
01:05:58,482 --> 01:06:01,654
We love you, sis.
I'm sorry.
1476
01:06:01,655 --> 01:06:06,343
Well, damn it. I missed it.
1477
01:06:06,344 --> 01:06:08,481
- I'm gonna miss you.
- You too.
1478
01:06:08,482 --> 01:06:11,067
I feel like I did very good
in this tournament,
1479
01:06:11,068 --> 01:06:15,033
and I was a real contender
and a threat.
1480
01:06:15,034 --> 01:06:17,240
But the book is not done.
1481
01:06:17,241 --> 01:06:21,309
It's not finished.
It's just another chapter.
1482
01:06:21,310 --> 01:06:25,516
It's always the girls.
1483
01:06:25,517 --> 01:06:27,619
Condragulations, All Stars.
1484
01:06:27,620 --> 01:06:30,102
And, remember,
if you can't love yourself,
1485
01:06:30,103 --> 01:06:32,378
how in the hell
you gonna love somebody else?
1486
01:06:32,379 --> 01:06:34,274
Can I get an "amen" up in here?
1487
01:06:34,275 --> 01:06:35,378
all:
Amen.
1488
01:06:35,379 --> 01:06:37,481
All right,
now let the music play.
1489
01:06:37,482 --> 01:06:48,482
♪ Good luck,
and don't eff it up, up, up ♪
1490
01:06:50,379 --> 01:06:52,378
♪ Good luck, and don't ♪
1491
01:06:52,379 --> 01:06:54,550
♪ Good luck, and don't, unh ♪
1492
01:06:54,551 --> 01:06:58,067
♪ Good luck,
and don't eff it up, up, up ♪
1493
01:06:58,068 --> 01:06:59,723
♪ Good luck, and don't ♪
1494
01:06:59,724 --> 01:07:02,067
♪ Good luck, baby ♪
1495
01:07:02,068 --> 01:07:05,826
♪ Good luck,
and don't eff it up, up, up ♪
1496
01:07:05,827 --> 01:07:07,309
♪ Good luck, and don't ♪
1497
01:07:07,310 --> 01:07:09,723
♪ Good luck, baby ♪
1498
01:07:09,724 --> 01:07:14,448
♪ Good luck,
and don't eff it up, up, up ♪