7
00:00:39,666 --> 00:00:41,252
I've actually done my best

8
00:00:41,335 --> 00:00:43,712
to really
not think about this...

9
00:00:43,795 --> 00:00:45,089
...for 30 years,

10
00:00:45,172 --> 00:00:47,716
let alone
talk out loud about it.

11
00:00:49,343 --> 00:00:51,803
Society has a weird view
towards women

12
00:00:51,887 --> 00:00:53,389
in these relationships.

13
00:00:53,472 --> 00:00:55,224
There's so much misogyny.

14
00:00:55,307 --> 00:00:56,683
You're sort of pigeonholed

15
00:00:56,767 --> 00:00:59,186
into this "girlfriend"
or "ex-girlfriend,"

16
00:00:59,269 --> 00:01:03,231
or you're... these roles,
and you're supposed to...

17
00:01:03,314 --> 00:01:05,484
sort of be cut
as a pathetic figure.

18
00:01:08,778 --> 00:01:11,073
I've gone as far
from being an artist

19
00:01:11,156 --> 00:01:13,116
in New York City
as one can imagine,

20
00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:17,162
and I think that is a lot
because of his death.

21
00:01:18,622 --> 00:01:22,167
♪ No... ♪

22
00:01:22,251 --> 00:01:27,381
He heard the whole of his person
in the music.

23
00:01:29,007 --> 00:01:32,468
Writing his second record
was so daunting.

24
00:01:32,552 --> 00:01:35,305
♪ Tonight, as I stand... ♪

25
00:01:35,389 --> 00:01:38,559
It was
a huge step forward for him.

26
00:01:39,893 --> 00:01:42,020
But I haven't been able
to listen.

27
00:01:44,314 --> 00:01:47,317
That might sound crazy,
but I can't.

28
00:01:56,952 --> 00:01:59,955
♪ Just like a woman, yes... ♪

29
00:02:00,038 --> 00:02:02,666
I certainly
was a flawed parent.

30
00:02:03,333 --> 00:02:05,085
♪ Just like a woman ♪

31
00:02:05,168 --> 00:02:06,962
But he sure got me, you know?

32
00:02:07,045 --> 00:02:08,714
And he got exactly
where I came from,

33
00:02:08,797 --> 00:02:09,840
and understood...

34
00:02:11,508 --> 00:02:14,803
why I made the choices
I made in my life.

35
00:02:16,763 --> 00:02:22,894
No one has ever loved me
more or better...

36
00:02:24,187 --> 00:02:25,481
than he.

37
00:02:46,793 --> 00:02:48,712
Every human being has music

38
00:02:48,795 --> 00:02:50,130
that only they can make.

39
00:02:51,340 --> 00:02:55,135
And it's... my deepest form
of communication with people.

40
00:02:56,928 --> 00:03:00,474
It'll always keep on changing,
it'll always defy anything

41
00:03:00,557 --> 00:03:03,685
that tries to...
put people in a box.

42
00:03:08,899 --> 00:03:13,487
♪ This is our last goodbye ♪

43
00:03:13,570 --> 00:03:18,908
♪ I hate to feel the love
Between us die ♪

44
00:03:18,991 --> 00:03:22,079
♪ But it's over ♪

45
00:03:22,162 --> 00:03:25,499
♪ Just hear this
And then I'll go ♪

46
00:03:25,582 --> 00:03:31,254
♪ You gave me more to live for
More than you'll ever know ♪

47
00:03:31,338 --> 00:03:32,548
There are things
I want to do

48
00:03:32,631 --> 00:03:33,851
that I've never heard of.

49
00:03:34,174 --> 00:03:35,092
It's my life.

50
00:03:35,175 --> 00:03:40,638
♪ Yeah, this is
Our last embrace ♪

51
00:03:40,722 --> 00:03:45,561
♪ Must I dream
And always see your face? ♪

52
00:03:45,644 --> 00:03:48,980
I just love when men use
their voice so unselfconsciously.

53
00:03:49,064 --> 00:03:51,275
I mean, he was literally
the best singer I've ever heard.

54
00:03:51,358 --> 00:03:55,445
And he was so amazed
by what female singers could do.

55
00:03:55,529 --> 00:03:58,281
Feminine, masculine,
he was and is my favorite.

56
00:03:58,365 --> 00:04:03,203
♪ Kiss me, please kiss me ♪

57
00:04:03,286 --> 00:04:06,248
♪ But kiss me
Out of desire, babe... ♪

58
00:04:06,331 --> 00:04:08,500
When you really dig
into the lyrics,

59
00:04:08,583 --> 00:04:13,088
it's so sacred,
him recognizing his own...

60
00:04:13,171 --> 00:04:15,257
I guess
you could call it "mortality."

61
00:04:15,340 --> 00:04:20,429
♪ I'll only make you cry
This is our last goodbye ♪

62
00:04:20,512 --> 00:04:23,682
I wanna be
songwriter Jeff.

63
00:04:23,765 --> 00:04:24,975
Jeff Buckley, songwriter.

64
00:04:25,058 --> 00:04:31,356
♪ Oh, oh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh ♪

65
00:04:31,440 --> 00:04:33,191
He had a way of playing

66
00:04:33,275 --> 00:04:36,278
the most beautiful songs
you've ever heard.

67
00:04:36,361 --> 00:04:38,238
He could literally have been
doing anything musically

68
00:04:38,321 --> 00:04:39,573
that he wanted to do.

69
00:04:39,656 --> 00:04:45,704
♪ Offer signs that it's over ♪

70
00:04:45,787 --> 00:04:48,081
♪ Oh, oh ♪

71
00:04:51,585 --> 00:04:58,008
♪ It's o... o... over ♪

72
00:05:09,478 --> 00:05:11,813
First time I heard Jeff sing...

73
00:05:12,814 --> 00:05:16,234
he was in the bassinet.

74
00:05:20,822 --> 00:05:23,408
One time I came in
and I could hear him.

75
00:05:23,492 --> 00:05:27,037
He was vocalizing to the radio.

76
00:05:35,253 --> 00:05:38,215
The day I heard
"Ain't No Mountain High Enough,"

77
00:05:38,298 --> 00:05:40,050
boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

78
00:05:40,133 --> 00:05:42,636
I thought, "Ooh, damn!"

79
00:05:42,719 --> 00:05:45,972
"He's a singer."

80
00:05:48,850 --> 00:05:50,644
Music charged my life.

81
00:05:51,520 --> 00:05:52,938
A good childhood?

82
00:05:53,021 --> 00:05:54,231
Uh...

83
00:05:56,316 --> 00:05:57,400
it was a childhood.

84
00:06:09,371 --> 00:06:10,914
My mom's a first-generation

85
00:06:10,997 --> 00:06:13,041
Panamanian immigrant.

86
00:06:13,124 --> 00:06:17,671
Very good girl, brought up
with Voodoo-Catholic values.

87
00:06:17,754 --> 00:06:19,631
You know,
brought over to Anaheim,

88
00:06:19,714 --> 00:06:21,131
you know, that hellhole

89
00:06:21,216 --> 00:06:22,968
in Southern California
where Disneyland is.

90
00:06:33,019 --> 00:06:36,231
My parents had
high hopes for me.

91
00:06:36,314 --> 00:06:39,276
You know, immigrant parents,
their eldest child.

92
00:06:39,359 --> 00:06:42,237
I wanted to be an actress,
and sing and dance

93
00:06:42,320 --> 00:06:43,906
and play the piano,

94
00:06:43,989 --> 00:06:47,075
but I had soiled the family name

95
00:06:47,158 --> 00:06:51,079
and dishonored them,
having premarital sex.

96
00:06:54,541 --> 00:06:56,835
I met Timothy
in French class.

97
00:06:58,253 --> 00:07:01,673
He would do things
like pull one hair on my...

98
00:07:01,756 --> 00:07:03,217
Right?
And I would turn around,

99
00:07:03,300 --> 00:07:06,177
and he would be
looking up.

100
00:07:06,261 --> 00:07:09,639
We were two kids
from abusive, crazy homes

101
00:07:09,723 --> 00:07:13,018
and we just knew the world
better than anybody else.

102
00:07:14,477 --> 00:07:18,565
♪ Now you wanna know
The reason ♪

103
00:07:18,648 --> 00:07:20,442
Seventeen at the time,

104
00:07:20,525 --> 00:07:23,236
I was already
a teenage pregnant mom.

105
00:07:23,320 --> 00:07:27,157
♪ Why I cheated on you ♪

106
00:07:27,240 --> 00:07:28,909
My parents thought
maybe I should

107
00:07:28,992 --> 00:07:31,202
give the baby up for adoption.

108
00:07:31,286 --> 00:07:32,746
But there was no choice for me

109
00:07:32,829 --> 00:07:34,581
but to go through
with the pregnancy.

110
00:07:34,664 --> 00:07:37,208
And I knew from the fifth month

111
00:07:37,292 --> 00:07:39,961
that I was never going
to see Tim again.

112
00:07:41,254 --> 00:07:45,091
♪ This little man had to try ♪

113
00:07:45,175 --> 00:07:47,469
First of all,
he was with somebody else.

114
00:07:47,552 --> 00:07:50,221
♪ To make love feel new again ♪

115
00:07:50,305 --> 00:07:54,392
Plus, he was determined
to be a singer-songwriter.

116
00:07:55,477 --> 00:07:57,687
This child was on me.

117
00:07:58,896 --> 00:08:00,983
♪ 'Cause there's just
A few things, honey... ♪

118
00:08:01,066 --> 00:08:02,817
He split before I was born.

119
00:08:03,944 --> 00:08:06,612
You know, he decided
not to be a father to me.

120
00:08:07,989 --> 00:08:09,032
You don't serve
your country, man.

121
00:08:09,115 --> 00:08:10,534
You serve life,
you serve people.

122
00:08:12,202 --> 00:08:14,705
TV, from the very beginning,
and also public schools,

123
00:08:14,788 --> 00:08:16,349
have been the great lobotomizer.

124
00:08:17,624 --> 00:08:19,626
Everything in the outer world
is not the world.

125
00:08:19,709 --> 00:08:21,753
Cars, how much perfume
you wear...

126
00:08:21,836 --> 00:08:23,005
The world is what's inside

127
00:08:23,088 --> 00:08:25,090
and what cats
pull out of themselves

128
00:08:25,173 --> 00:08:27,300
-all through time.
-I said to him,

129
00:08:27,384 --> 00:08:30,720
"You gotta go
pursue your dreams, you go."

130
00:08:30,804 --> 00:08:33,849
But... my dreams
of being an actress

131
00:08:33,932 --> 00:08:35,558
or being a concert pianist...

132
00:08:36,559 --> 00:08:37,560
that was all gone.

133
00:08:44,275 --> 00:08:47,904
Jeff and I
sort of raised each other.

134
00:08:54,536 --> 00:08:56,038
Well,
his father wasn't there,

135
00:08:56,121 --> 00:08:59,416
but this woman loved him
with all her heart

136
00:08:59,499 --> 00:09:01,877
and didn't hesitate

137
00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:06,006
to make him feel loved
at every chance she had.

138
00:09:06,089 --> 00:09:09,300
He would come and put
his little hands on my face,

139
00:09:09,384 --> 00:09:12,095
and say, "We're gonna be okay,
Mommy, right?"

140
00:09:12,178 --> 00:09:14,639
And I'd go, "Yes, we are, honey.
We're just fine."

141
00:09:16,141 --> 00:09:20,228
He... had to take care of her.

142
00:09:20,311 --> 00:09:24,774
And he was feeling like
she had been hurt...

143
00:09:25,650 --> 00:09:27,819
and feeling horrible about that.

144
00:09:29,154 --> 00:09:34,868
♪ Perhaps it is the color
Of the sun cut flat ♪

145
00:09:34,951 --> 00:09:40,957
♪ And covering the crossroads
I'm standing at ♪

146
00:09:41,041 --> 00:09:44,127
Jeff was like having
a grandfather watching over me

147
00:09:44,210 --> 00:09:47,089
and telling me who was
okay to date and who wasn't.

148
00:09:47,172 --> 00:09:52,343
♪ But Mama
You've been on my mind... ♪

149
00:09:52,427 --> 00:09:55,180
When I was a kid, I always
felt really proud if I could roll a joint

150
00:09:55,263 --> 00:09:56,431
for all the grownups
at the party.

151
00:09:56,514 --> 00:09:58,058
I never did it,
but, like, I always...

152
00:09:58,141 --> 00:09:59,768
"I wanna do it, let me do it!"

153
00:09:59,851 --> 00:10:02,938
I now remember the day
that my mom called me over

154
00:10:03,021 --> 00:10:05,107
to the reclining chair
and tried to explain to me

155
00:10:05,190 --> 00:10:07,442
that if I told anybody
that they did this stuff,

156
00:10:07,525 --> 00:10:09,903
they would go to jail.

157
00:10:11,821 --> 00:10:16,493
♪ And all because of the man ♪

158
00:10:17,243 --> 00:10:19,162
♪ That got away... ♪

159
00:10:19,245 --> 00:10:21,873
When Jeff was little,
before I even made coffee,

160
00:10:21,956 --> 00:10:26,253
music would go on, constant.
Constant, constant, constant.

161
00:10:26,336 --> 00:10:29,214
Judy Garland.
"The Man That Got Away."

162
00:10:29,297 --> 00:10:30,340
I love that song.

163
00:10:31,591 --> 00:10:33,301
And it was very important to us.

164
00:10:36,679 --> 00:10:38,556
♪ Oh, I want
A whole lotta love... ♪

165
00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:42,769
My stepfather, Ronald,
he was a car mechanic.

166
00:10:42,852 --> 00:10:45,105
He was the one that
introduced me to Led Zepplin.

167
00:10:45,188 --> 00:10:46,700
And that changed my whole life.

168
00:10:48,483 --> 00:10:50,652
Ron would turn
the stereo on loud enough,

169
00:10:50,735 --> 00:10:54,280
the whole block could hear,
and there would be Little Jeff

170
00:10:54,364 --> 00:10:56,574
laying on top of the speakers

171
00:10:56,658 --> 00:11:00,370
with his little body
vibrating to the music.

172
00:11:00,453 --> 00:11:04,332
Music, it was my mother,
it was my father.

173
00:11:04,415 --> 00:11:06,835
It was the best thing
in my life.

174
00:11:10,296 --> 00:11:14,509
I see in the newspaper
this quarter-page ad.

175
00:11:14,592 --> 00:11:16,386
Tim Buckley
made a name for himself

176
00:11:16,469 --> 00:11:19,181
as one of pop music's
genuine innovators.

177
00:11:19,264 --> 00:11:21,057
Over the course of nine albums,

178
00:11:21,141 --> 00:11:23,018
he incorporated
the prettiest of folk music,

179
00:11:23,101 --> 00:11:25,436
the most extreme
of free-form jazz,

180
00:11:25,520 --> 00:11:27,856
and the raunchiest
of rock and blues.

181
00:11:27,939 --> 00:11:31,026
And I thought, "Wow,
maybe this is an opportunity

182
00:11:31,109 --> 00:11:34,195
for my son
to get to know his father."

183
00:11:35,864 --> 00:11:38,325
I looked at Jeff
and said, "Hey...

184
00:11:38,408 --> 00:11:41,286
would you like to go
see your dad perform?"

185
00:11:48,251 --> 00:11:52,505
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

186
00:11:52,589 --> 00:11:56,593
♪ I'm singin', Sally go 'round ♪

187
00:11:56,676 --> 00:11:58,553
Jeff was rocking
to the music...

188
00:11:58,636 --> 00:12:01,264
♪ The saddest thing
In this whole wide world... ♪

189
00:12:01,347 --> 00:12:03,850
...and looking up at his dad.

190
00:12:03,933 --> 00:12:06,645
Tim had his eyes closed,
but he had to know he was there,

191
00:12:06,728 --> 00:12:08,230
had to be aware of his presence.

192
00:12:08,313 --> 00:12:10,398
♪ Sally, don't you go down ♪

193
00:12:12,650 --> 00:12:14,486
When he went back
to the green room,

194
00:12:14,569 --> 00:12:16,947
I looked down and said,
"Do you wanna go see him now?"

195
00:12:17,030 --> 00:12:19,741
And I could feel Jeff
clutching my skirt...

196
00:12:19,824 --> 00:12:21,618
...you know,
kind of hanging on,

197
00:12:21,701 --> 00:12:23,494
pressing close
and looking around.

198
00:12:25,205 --> 00:12:28,708
I couldn't see Tim at first,
and then I heard, "Jeff!

199
00:12:30,126 --> 00:12:32,879
Hi, bud. How are you doing?"

200
00:12:32,962 --> 00:12:35,465
Jeff sat on his lap
and he started talking,

201
00:12:35,548 --> 00:12:37,800
what his favorite color was,

202
00:12:37,884 --> 00:12:41,137
"My dog's name is King,"
what grade he was in.

203
00:12:45,350 --> 00:12:47,269
About ten minutes later,
Tim said,

204
00:12:47,352 --> 00:12:49,771
"We'd like to take him home
with us tonight."

205
00:12:50,730 --> 00:12:54,984
I'm going, "Okay."

206
00:12:55,068 --> 00:12:57,279
"Yeah, you can
take him home right now,

207
00:12:57,362 --> 00:12:58,738
but you better not fuck up."

208
00:13:02,158 --> 00:13:05,245
I stayed with him a week.
Easter vacation.

209
00:13:08,998 --> 00:13:11,417
He had an adopted son,
he had a new wife,

210
00:13:11,501 --> 00:13:13,211
he had a whole other family.

211
00:13:15,255 --> 00:13:17,589
Four days later,
I got a telephone call.

212
00:13:17,674 --> 00:13:20,009
Tim had to get back
into the studio,

213
00:13:20,093 --> 00:13:23,304
and put Jeff on a bus
in Santa Monica.

214
00:13:27,558 --> 00:13:31,020
"It was so much fun.
My dad has a lot of friends.

215
00:13:31,104 --> 00:13:32,397
And he gave me this."

216
00:13:34,691 --> 00:13:36,442
I said, "You save that, buddy."

217
00:13:40,196 --> 00:13:41,698
No calls were returned.

218
00:13:44,951 --> 00:13:46,536
It was two months before.

219
00:13:51,332 --> 00:13:53,584
I have a great deal
of pain and anger,

220
00:13:53,668 --> 00:13:56,129
but I have a great deal
of love and compassion...

221
00:13:56,838 --> 00:13:57,839
for Tim.

222
00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:04,262
Some things that he did
completely embarrass me to hell.

223
00:14:04,345 --> 00:14:07,640
But the things that were great
hold up against anything.

224
00:14:09,475 --> 00:14:13,146
Jeff wasn't even mentioned
in any of the obituaries.

225
00:14:14,230 --> 00:14:15,649
By the time
I was in high school,

226
00:14:15,732 --> 00:14:17,191
got my first electric guitar.

227
00:14:18,067 --> 00:14:20,570
It was a black
Memphis Les Paul copy.

228
00:14:21,696 --> 00:14:23,406
Yeah, just fell in
with the wrong crowd

229
00:14:23,489 --> 00:14:25,367
and got a band together,
of course.

230
00:14:27,368 --> 00:14:29,996
♪ Eternal life
Is now on my trail ♪

231
00:14:33,583 --> 00:14:39,881
♪ Got my red glitter coffin, man
Just need one last nail ♪

232
00:14:42,592 --> 00:14:44,927
♪ While all these
Ugly gentlemen ♪

233
00:14:45,011 --> 00:14:48,890
♪ Play out their foolish games ♪

234
00:14:51,017 --> 00:14:56,398
♪ There's a flaming red horizon
That screams our names ♪

235
00:15:01,986 --> 00:15:08,326
At 15, Jeff was practicing
Al Di Meola every night.

236
00:15:08,409 --> 00:15:10,704
That was a fixation I had
up until the time

237
00:15:10,787 --> 00:15:14,624
I was maybe 16.
And I can play anything I hear.

238
00:15:21,923 --> 00:15:24,426
My high school bullies
called me "faggot."

239
00:15:24,509 --> 00:15:27,137
And their fucking new-wave
girlfriends stenciled, "Geek,"

240
00:15:27,220 --> 00:15:30,973
on my fucking Ovation Viper
electric guitar case.

241
00:15:31,057 --> 00:15:32,350
♪ Roxanne ♪

242
00:15:34,060 --> 00:15:37,730
♪ You don't have to put on
The red light ♪

243
00:15:37,814 --> 00:15:42,819
Jeff had an ability
to mimic the vocal cadences,

244
00:15:42,902 --> 00:15:45,738
and the inflections of people
he was listening to.

245
00:15:45,822 --> 00:15:47,281
♪ Roxanne ♪

246
00:15:49,117 --> 00:15:52,995
♪ You don't have to wear
That dress tonight ♪

247
00:15:54,288 --> 00:15:55,790
♪ Walk the streets for... ♪

248
00:15:57,166 --> 00:15:59,627
It's in exact album... It's...

249
00:15:59,710 --> 00:16:00,920
'Cause, you know,
a lot of people

250
00:16:01,003 --> 00:16:02,756
-would tune it down a step...
-Yeah, yeah.

251
00:16:02,839 --> 00:16:04,381
...so they could hit the note.
This is the exact...

252
00:16:04,464 --> 00:16:05,550
It's album pitch.

253
00:16:05,633 --> 00:16:07,594
♪ You don't have to put on
The red light... ♪

254
00:16:07,677 --> 00:16:09,679
It's the same key.

255
00:16:14,559 --> 00:16:17,061
I used to wanna be
a guitar aficionado.

256
00:16:19,814 --> 00:16:21,608
But the thing
I was going to learn

257
00:16:21,691 --> 00:16:23,276
to do best was songwriting.

258
00:16:23,943 --> 00:16:24,944
Music and words.

259
00:16:26,946 --> 00:16:28,656
I decided to make
a woman of music

260
00:16:28,739 --> 00:16:30,450
and give myself to her.

261
00:16:31,408 --> 00:16:33,119
And at another point,
I decided to make

262
00:16:33,202 --> 00:16:35,872
a man of music
and give myself to him.

263
00:16:37,540 --> 00:16:40,041
When you're a kid, people assume

264
00:16:40,126 --> 00:16:43,087
that you have no mind
of your own,

265
00:16:43,171 --> 00:16:44,797
which, at a very early age,
I did.

266
00:16:48,426 --> 00:16:51,513
I put so many things
onto music for me...

267
00:16:51,596 --> 00:16:55,600
so that I wouldn't shrink
into a black...

268
00:16:57,268 --> 00:16:59,061
universe.

269
00:17:06,903 --> 00:17:10,406
St. Ann's in Brooklyn
wanted Jeff to sing

270
00:17:10,490 --> 00:17:13,117
at a tribute to Tim.

271
00:17:16,454 --> 00:17:19,332
♪ I never asked to fly ♪

272
00:17:19,415 --> 00:17:20,625
I said, "No."

273
00:17:20,708 --> 00:17:22,252
♪ Remember when you came to me ♪

274
00:17:22,335 --> 00:17:24,670
"I will never, ever
perform that music."

275
00:17:26,255 --> 00:17:28,007
"I've got my own music."

276
00:17:30,426 --> 00:17:31,886
I said,
"You know what, son?

277
00:17:31,969 --> 00:17:33,054
Give it some thought.

278
00:17:33,137 --> 00:17:35,431
There's gonna be
some really amazing artists

279
00:17:35,515 --> 00:17:36,516
in the line-up."

280
00:17:37,433 --> 00:17:38,476
So, I said, "Okay,

281
00:17:38,559 --> 00:17:41,145
but I just wanna
come on and sing, and come off.

282
00:17:41,229 --> 00:17:42,522
This is not a springboard.

283
00:17:42,605 --> 00:17:44,065
This is something
really personal."

284
00:17:44,148 --> 00:17:45,274
And they told me,

285
00:17:45,358 --> 00:17:47,193
"Well, we don't know
how good he is

286
00:17:47,276 --> 00:17:49,028
so we'll put him
with other artists

287
00:17:49,111 --> 00:17:52,073
to fill in any gaps
in his talents."

288
00:17:52,156 --> 00:17:53,616
Dangerous situations

289
00:17:53,699 --> 00:17:54,742
appeal to me.

290
00:17:55,618 --> 00:17:57,537
There had been a bit of buzz

291
00:17:57,620 --> 00:17:59,664
that Tim Buckley's son
would be there.

292
00:17:59,747 --> 00:18:00,748
I figured, "Hey,

293
00:18:00,831 --> 00:18:02,441
what's the worst
that can happen?"

294
00:18:12,843 --> 00:18:14,011
Um...

295
00:18:16,347 --> 00:18:19,016
The luminaries
of downtown were there.

296
00:18:20,309 --> 00:18:23,145
This could be exactly
what I dreamed for him.

297
00:18:23,229 --> 00:18:25,856
Uh...

298
00:18:26,774 --> 00:18:27,859
I didn't know who he was,

299
00:18:27,942 --> 00:18:30,987
and I'm working,
doing sound and lighting,

300
00:18:31,070 --> 00:18:33,656
but he was so nervous.
He was so...

301
00:18:33,739 --> 00:18:35,783
Like, his hair
was just in front of his face,

302
00:18:35,866 --> 00:18:39,870
and he seemed so awkward.

303
00:18:39,954 --> 00:18:43,583
Long time ago,
when I was a little kid,

304
00:18:43,666 --> 00:18:46,877
my mom sat on a bed
and she put this record on,

305
00:18:47,670 --> 00:18:49,213
and I heard my father's voice.

306
00:18:50,506 --> 00:18:53,009
He had on
his father's coat,

307
00:18:53,509 --> 00:18:54,927
and he started to play

308
00:18:55,011 --> 00:18:58,973
his dad's song
about leaving him as a child.

309
00:18:59,056 --> 00:19:02,727
♪ I never asked
To be your mountain ♪

310
00:19:02,810 --> 00:19:06,188
-♪ I never asked to fly ♪
-And he was weeping.

311
00:19:06,272 --> 00:19:09,442
♪ Remember when you came to me ♪

312
00:19:09,525 --> 00:19:11,861
♪ And told me of his lies ♪

313
00:19:13,070 --> 00:19:16,282
♪ You didn't understand
My love ♪

314
00:19:16,365 --> 00:19:18,784
♪ You don't know why I try ♪

315
00:19:19,910 --> 00:19:23,331
♪ And the rain
Was falling on that day ♪

316
00:19:23,414 --> 00:19:26,334
♪ And damn the reason why ♪

317
00:19:26,751 --> 00:19:27,877
♪ Oh ♪

318
00:19:28,794 --> 00:19:32,757
♪ Sweet! Sweet! ♪

319
00:19:33,591 --> 00:19:37,553
♪ Sweet lover! ♪

320
00:19:41,557 --> 00:19:43,351
It did become Jeff's concert.

321
00:19:49,523 --> 00:19:52,318
I was like,
"This can't be real."

322
00:19:56,530 --> 00:19:57,782
He told me he walked away

323
00:19:57,865 --> 00:20:00,493
with no less
than 60 business cards

324
00:20:00,576 --> 00:20:02,036
in his pockets.

325
00:20:02,119 --> 00:20:03,663
My friend,
he said he heard

326
00:20:03,746 --> 00:20:05,665
Tim Buckley's haunted voice.

327
00:20:05,748 --> 00:20:08,125
It's not his voice
and it's not my voice.

328
00:20:08,209 --> 00:20:09,794
It's the voice
that's been passed down

329
00:20:09,877 --> 00:20:12,880
through every man in the family.

330
00:20:15,174 --> 00:20:17,010
He came out
and sat next to me and said,

331
00:20:17,093 --> 00:20:18,260
"What do you think?"

332
00:20:19,595 --> 00:20:21,347
I was thinking,
"My opinion here...

333
00:20:21,430 --> 00:20:22,682
...does not matter,"

334
00:20:22,765 --> 00:20:25,685
but that was really stunning,
like, just so beautiful.

335
00:20:31,440 --> 00:20:32,984
He was asking
if he could walk me

336
00:20:33,067 --> 00:20:36,320
to the subway
and gets on the train with me,

337
00:20:36,404 --> 00:20:37,905
and took it all the way
into Manhattan,

338
00:20:37,988 --> 00:20:39,115
and we're talking and talking.

339
00:20:39,198 --> 00:20:40,450
And we stayed on that train,

340
00:20:40,533 --> 00:20:44,495
and we went all the way up
to the last stop.

341
00:20:44,578 --> 00:20:45,705
Besides reading
and movies,

342
00:20:45,788 --> 00:20:47,165
what I really like
is night prowling,

343
00:20:47,248 --> 00:20:49,875
finding out-of-the-way places
where the misfits go.

344
00:20:52,253 --> 00:20:54,046
You're making me laugh so much.

345
00:20:56,382 --> 00:20:57,550
Then we got
into downtown,

346
00:20:57,633 --> 00:21:00,678
and we went all the way
to Coney Island and back.

347
00:21:01,929 --> 00:21:08,018
♪ I will take to any task
I'll do anything you ask ♪

348
00:21:08,102 --> 00:21:10,855
♪ If you really ♪

349
00:21:10,938 --> 00:21:16,777
♪ Love me still ♪

350
00:21:19,321 --> 00:21:21,824
He was so interested
in what I did...

351
00:21:21,907 --> 00:21:23,368
...which really surprised me

352
00:21:23,451 --> 00:21:25,828
'cause I was doing
experimental theater.

353
00:21:27,163 --> 00:21:30,040
It was really less
about money and fame,

354
00:21:30,124 --> 00:21:32,334
and more about
pushing the boundaries.

355
00:21:33,878 --> 00:21:35,546
Nobody I knew my own age

356
00:21:35,629 --> 00:21:37,673
was really interested
in any of that,

357
00:21:37,757 --> 00:21:39,300
but he was someone who

358
00:21:39,383 --> 00:21:41,051
drank up the world
like a sponge.

359
00:21:48,934 --> 00:21:50,895
♪ You make me feel so young ♪

360
00:21:50,978 --> 00:21:52,438
Thank you.

361
00:21:52,521 --> 00:21:56,109
♪ You make me feel like
Spring has sprung ♪

362
00:21:56,192 --> 00:21:58,402
I was in a play with Rebecca,

363
00:21:58,486 --> 00:21:59,821
I was in high school.

364
00:21:59,904 --> 00:22:02,406
And Jeff just felt
very electric to me.

365
00:22:05,951 --> 00:22:08,204
Jeff had
a real lust for life.

366
00:22:09,497 --> 00:22:11,082
The East Village
at that time

367
00:22:11,165 --> 00:22:13,626
was such a collection
of every eccentric

368
00:22:13,709 --> 00:22:15,544
that did not fit in
anywhere else.

369
00:22:17,880 --> 00:22:19,757
♪ You and I... ♪

370
00:22:19,840 --> 00:22:24,094
He saw so many people
breaking down the status quo.

371
00:22:24,178 --> 00:22:28,808
Artists were being banned.
The NEA was being censored.

372
00:22:28,891 --> 00:22:31,185
New York was the place
for this amazing stuff...

373
00:22:31,268 --> 00:22:33,229
...stuff
I can't even describe to you.

374
00:22:35,439 --> 00:22:37,024
Sometimes he would
just disappear,

375
00:22:37,107 --> 00:22:38,860
and I'd get a call
from a friend later, going,

376
00:22:38,943 --> 00:22:41,070
"Jeff showed up
at my house today."

377
00:22:41,153 --> 00:22:43,197
Every moment was so spontaneous.

378
00:22:45,324 --> 00:22:48,160
He would make
very elaborate outgoing messages

379
00:22:48,244 --> 00:22:50,454
like old-time radio shows.

380
00:22:51,997 --> 00:22:55,251
And now,
the continuing adventures of...

381
00:22:55,334 --> 00:22:57,086
Spinach the Cat...

382
00:22:57,169 --> 00:23:00,005
His most famous
being Spinach the Cat.

383
00:23:00,089 --> 00:23:02,132
...house cat on the edge.

384
00:23:02,216 --> 00:23:04,927
And now, your host,
Quentin Snobbery!

385
00:23:05,010 --> 00:23:06,262
Jeff didn't have a job

386
00:23:06,345 --> 00:23:08,264
so he had a lot of time
on his hands.

387
00:23:08,347 --> 00:23:11,517
Jeff used to look specifically
for Michael Bolton tapes

388
00:23:11,600 --> 00:23:12,977
so he could put
the piece of tape

389
00:23:13,060 --> 00:23:15,104
over the top and record over it.

390
00:23:17,022 --> 00:23:19,233
He would line up tape recorders
'cause there was no samplers,

391
00:23:19,316 --> 00:23:21,152
there was
no digital computer, nothing.

392
00:23:21,235 --> 00:23:24,321
He basically created
this little studio

393
00:23:24,405 --> 00:23:26,574
all for this...
...outgoing message.

394
00:23:26,657 --> 00:23:28,075
Pressing this sound effect

395
00:23:28,158 --> 00:23:29,827
for when the crowd cheers.

396
00:23:29,910 --> 00:23:31,996
This sound effect
when the cat meows.

397
00:23:32,079 --> 00:23:34,331
It was an hour long.

398
00:23:34,415 --> 00:23:35,833
And so people,

399
00:23:37,167 --> 00:23:40,880
they had to listen
to this hour-long soap opera.

400
00:23:42,548 --> 00:23:43,674
He asked me,

401
00:23:43,757 --> 00:23:46,093
"Do you think
this part is too much?"

402
00:23:46,176 --> 00:23:50,264
I thought, "The whole thing
is too much."

403
00:23:50,347 --> 00:23:51,390
Join us next time

404
00:23:51,473 --> 00:23:55,978
for the continuing adventures
of Spinach the Cat.

405
00:23:56,061 --> 00:23:57,647
Girlfriend...

406
00:23:57,730 --> 00:24:00,649
I love you.
I love...

407
00:24:00,733 --> 00:24:03,360
I think
Jeff had this desire

408
00:24:03,444 --> 00:24:07,907
to be liked and loved,
and to connect with people.

409
00:24:15,289 --> 00:24:17,750
Jeff started
calling me "Butterfly."

410
00:24:20,085 --> 00:24:24,840
I think he saw me at that point
of coming out of a cocoon.

411
00:24:30,971 --> 00:24:33,808
We were these two
sensitive young souls

412
00:24:33,891 --> 00:24:37,227
searching for where you fit in
and feel empowered and loved,

413
00:24:37,311 --> 00:24:39,271
and found each other.

414
00:24:39,355 --> 00:24:45,569
♪ I once was open
At one with a traveling heart ♪

415
00:24:45,653 --> 00:24:49,281
But I called him...
...the Scratchy Fish,

416
00:24:49,365 --> 00:24:53,953
'cause he was always
not shaving, very bristly.

417
00:24:54,036 --> 00:24:57,164
And he started
making these stories,

418
00:24:57,247 --> 00:24:58,916
almost like children's stories.

419
00:24:58,999 --> 00:25:00,793
This is Scratchy Fishy,

420
00:25:00,876 --> 00:25:02,294
this is their home,

421
00:25:02,378 --> 00:25:06,299
and this is Butterfly,
and they're getting married.

422
00:25:06,382 --> 00:25:09,885
The story he wove
about a butterfly and a fish

423
00:25:09,969 --> 00:25:12,429
was that they could
never be together.

424
00:25:13,722 --> 00:25:16,600
♪ Just like the ocean ♪

425
00:25:16,684 --> 00:25:22,439
♪ Always in love with the moon ♪

426
00:25:23,273 --> 00:25:28,112
♪ It's overflowing now ♪

427
00:25:28,195 --> 00:25:31,407
♪ Inside you ♪

428
00:25:31,490 --> 00:25:32,742
You could see in his eyes

429
00:25:32,825 --> 00:25:34,785
that he would sometimes go
to this place

430
00:25:34,868 --> 00:25:37,496
that I think
was very inaccessible

431
00:25:37,579 --> 00:25:39,331
to anyone but himself.

432
00:25:39,415 --> 00:25:41,375
He just would check out.

433
00:25:43,085 --> 00:25:47,756
♪ In the half-light ♪

434
00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:50,467
♪ You saw me ♪

435
00:25:50,551 --> 00:25:54,972
♪ As I am ♪

436
00:26:01,186 --> 00:26:04,481
♪ The stars
Have lost their glitter ♪

437
00:26:05,190 --> 00:26:08,152
♪ The winds have grown colder ♪

438
00:26:08,235 --> 00:26:12,365
I wanted to be a... you know,
a chanteuse.

439
00:26:12,448 --> 00:26:15,743
♪ Don't know what happened ♪

440
00:26:15,826 --> 00:26:22,332
♪ It's all a crazy game ♪

441
00:26:22,416 --> 00:26:25,002
Secretly, I think
I wanted to be Nina Simone.

442
00:26:25,085 --> 00:26:30,007
♪ -♪ I love all things about you ♪

443
00:26:30,090 --> 00:26:32,969
Although she would advise
against this strongly, I'm sure.

444
00:26:33,052 --> 00:26:34,720
-♪ Your heart ♪
-♪ Your heart... ♪

445
00:26:34,803 --> 00:26:39,224
Sometimes, I think I wanted
to be Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan.

446
00:26:44,063 --> 00:26:45,439
He was my Elvis.

447
00:27:10,756 --> 00:27:12,341
To be a scrappy

448
00:27:12,424 --> 00:27:15,010
young White kid
from Orange County

449
00:27:15,094 --> 00:27:19,014
covering Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan
or Nina Simone,

450
00:27:19,098 --> 00:27:20,516
you just have to give it up.

451
00:27:20,599 --> 00:27:22,559
He must've been
working his ass off.

452
00:27:25,354 --> 00:27:27,023
There was a tiny little club

453
00:27:27,106 --> 00:27:29,858
in the East Village
called Sin-e.

454
00:27:29,942 --> 00:27:32,778
♪ -You could probably fit in

455
00:27:32,861 --> 00:27:35,781
maybe 30 or 40 people
at the most,

456
00:27:35,864 --> 00:27:38,242
and it would be
super, super crowded.

457
00:27:38,325 --> 00:27:43,872
And Jeff was washing dishes,
he was serving people coffee,

458
00:27:43,956 --> 00:27:45,624
and then every now and then...

459
00:27:46,708 --> 00:27:48,377
he would just get up and play.

460
00:27:48,460 --> 00:27:50,295
Check. That's cool.

461
00:27:50,379 --> 00:27:53,090
I'm a ridiculous person.

462
00:27:53,173 --> 00:27:55,301
And you're lucky
you've paid no money to see me.

463
00:27:57,302 --> 00:28:00,556
It was
an Irish-run coffee shop.

464
00:28:00,639 --> 00:28:03,725
A great little place
to see somebody in the raw.

465
00:28:06,145 --> 00:28:08,438
This is a perfect place
for music lovers.

466
00:28:08,522 --> 00:28:09,940
It's not like playing
at a rock club.

467
00:28:10,023 --> 00:28:11,567
It's not like playing at a ball.

468
00:28:11,650 --> 00:28:13,569
This is a good place
to get real.

469
00:28:13,652 --> 00:28:14,903
Turn it up.

470
00:28:14,987 --> 00:28:17,031
It was so homey
in here.

471
00:28:17,114 --> 00:28:20,326
It just smelled
of, like, espresso.

472
00:28:20,409 --> 00:28:22,911
He'd be in the middle
of some, like, ballad

473
00:28:22,995 --> 00:28:25,664
and you just hear that...

474
00:28:27,708 --> 00:28:29,459
♪ And we sat on our own star ♪

475
00:28:29,543 --> 00:28:31,712
♪ And dreamed of the way
That I was... ♪

476
00:28:31,795 --> 00:28:33,338
The Sin-e community

477
00:28:33,422 --> 00:28:36,216
became a place
of such encouragement for him.

478
00:28:37,301 --> 00:28:40,596
It really became a home
where he could experiment.

479
00:28:40,679 --> 00:28:42,890
♪ It's a fabulous time ♪

480
00:28:42,973 --> 00:28:44,016
♪ For a Guinness ♪

481
00:28:44,099 --> 00:28:47,644
♪ You know the brown liquor ♪

482
00:28:58,363 --> 00:28:59,615
The Buttocks of Steel tour.

483
00:28:59,698 --> 00:29:01,075
Jeff Buckley.

484
00:29:01,158 --> 00:29:03,828
In the beginning,
there were just a few people.

485
00:29:03,911 --> 00:29:06,747
Then all of a sudden,
it was, like, packed.

486
00:29:06,830 --> 00:29:08,541
I'll play the seat-finding song.

487
00:29:08,624 --> 00:29:11,085
Crowds, you know,
spilling out into the street.

488
00:29:12,586 --> 00:29:13,921
Everybody, stop.

489
00:29:15,172 --> 00:29:17,007
He was really
an entertainer there

490
00:29:17,090 --> 00:29:18,800
as much as a musician.

491
00:29:18,884 --> 00:29:20,302
By the way,
all these songs are

492
00:29:20,385 --> 00:29:22,012
for the lovers in the audience.

493
00:29:22,095 --> 00:29:25,307
♪ - He mostly did covers.

494
00:29:25,390 --> 00:29:27,976
And then
he started introducing

495
00:29:28,060 --> 00:29:29,561
some original material.

496
00:29:30,687 --> 00:29:31,897
It went from laughing

497
00:29:31,980 --> 00:29:33,736
to jaw-dropping, you know?

498
00:29:34,358 --> 00:29:36,151
It's a song about a dream.

499
00:29:50,415 --> 00:29:54,795
♪ Ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh ♪

500
00:29:54,878 --> 00:29:59,967
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

501
00:30:01,843 --> 00:30:06,265
♪ Oh, oh ♪

502
00:30:06,348 --> 00:30:10,102
♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

503
00:30:13,897 --> 00:30:18,777
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

504
00:30:19,695 --> 00:30:26,159
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

505
00:30:26,743 --> 00:30:33,709
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

506
00:30:34,293 --> 00:30:38,964
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

507
00:30:39,047 --> 00:30:40,257
That was the first time
I ever saw

508
00:30:40,340 --> 00:30:42,217
Jeff Buckley. At Sin-e.

509
00:30:42,301 --> 00:30:44,261
♪ I'm lying in my bed ♪

510
00:30:44,344 --> 00:30:46,221
♪ The blanket is warm ♪

511
00:30:46,305 --> 00:30:50,142
♪ This body will never be safe
From harm ♪

512
00:30:50,225 --> 00:30:54,355
♪ I still feel your hair
Black ribbons of coal ♪

513
00:30:54,438 --> 00:30:56,023
♪ Touch my skin ♪

514
00:30:56,106 --> 00:31:01,528
♪ To keep me whole ♪

515
00:31:04,573 --> 00:31:07,242
I mean... a pin could drop.

516
00:31:08,452 --> 00:31:10,663
I wasn't thinking about
being a music executive.

517
00:31:10,746 --> 00:31:12,831
I was just a fan.

518
00:31:12,914 --> 00:31:16,084
♪ Oh, if only
You'd come back to me ♪

519
00:31:17,294 --> 00:31:21,048
♪ If you laid at my side ♪

520
00:31:21,131 --> 00:31:24,843
♪ Wouldn't need no mojo pin ♪

521
00:31:24,926 --> 00:31:30,015
♪ To keep me satisfied ♪

522
00:31:30,098 --> 00:31:32,267
I was there with Columbia.

523
00:31:33,310 --> 00:31:35,396
I... I think we were all
sort of stopped

524
00:31:35,479 --> 00:31:36,980
in our tracks that night.

525
00:31:48,367 --> 00:31:51,036
♪ Oh, precious, precious
Silver and gold ♪

526
00:31:51,119 --> 00:31:52,705
The whole
record company gauntlet

527
00:31:52,788 --> 00:31:55,165
started infesting my gigs.

528
00:31:55,248 --> 00:31:59,044
They were all there, the people
from Elektra, Arista, Sony.

529
00:31:59,127 --> 00:32:02,631
♪ And pray to love ♪

530
00:32:04,591 --> 00:32:06,093
It was a bit of a cotillion.

531
00:32:07,052 --> 00:32:08,470
But that's the way it goes.

532
00:32:11,723 --> 00:32:13,725
We'd all heard
so many nightmares

533
00:32:13,809 --> 00:32:17,938
about large labels
and lack of creative expression,

534
00:32:18,021 --> 00:32:20,774
but I think he went into it
feeling like he'd been reassured

535
00:32:20,857 --> 00:32:22,151
that he was gonna get that.

536
00:32:22,234 --> 00:32:26,196
♪ Well, it's you
I've waited my life to see ♪

537
00:32:26,279 --> 00:32:29,283
♪ It's you I've searched
So hard... ♪

538
00:32:29,366 --> 00:32:31,577
I knew that they were just
sitting there with bated breath,

539
00:32:31,660 --> 00:32:33,078
waiting for the new Tim Buckley

540
00:32:33,161 --> 00:32:35,622
to come up and pick up
where his father left off.

541
00:32:35,705 --> 00:32:40,085
I hated it. I couldn't stand it.
Fucking bullshit.

542
00:32:40,168 --> 00:32:42,254
What do you think
you inherited from your father?

543
00:32:42,337 --> 00:32:43,839
People who remember my father.

544
00:32:46,758 --> 00:32:48,093
Next question.

545
00:32:49,594 --> 00:32:52,180
I went around and sampled
record company people

546
00:32:52,264 --> 00:32:54,099
to find where I fit in.

547
00:32:54,182 --> 00:32:56,351
Jeff had a little bit of fear

548
00:32:56,435 --> 00:32:57,686
about the fact
that he didn't have

549
00:32:57,769 --> 00:32:59,104
more original material.

550
00:32:59,187 --> 00:33:00,773
I would never tell him
what to do,

551
00:33:00,856 --> 00:33:02,482
but I was like, "Go small."

552
00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:06,403
I went to Sony.
Well, Columbia.

553
00:33:06,486 --> 00:33:07,988
When you walk in,
the first thing you see

554
00:33:08,071 --> 00:33:11,158
is Bob Dylan on the wall,
looking beautiful.

555
00:33:11,241 --> 00:33:13,869
A foot away is Miles.

556
00:33:13,952 --> 00:33:16,955
Foot away is Monk,
Duke Ellington,

557
00:33:17,038 --> 00:33:18,540
Chambers Brothers, Mahalia.

558
00:33:18,623 --> 00:33:20,917
♪ Sometimes I feel... ♪

559
00:33:21,001 --> 00:33:23,295
It was purely emotional.
I was like, "Yeah, this is...

560
00:33:23,378 --> 00:33:25,755
I wanna be... here."

561
00:33:28,425 --> 00:33:31,136
Columbia has
such a storied legacy

562
00:33:31,219 --> 00:33:34,973
of Leonard Cohen and Bob Dylan
and Bruce Springsteen.

563
00:33:35,056 --> 00:33:38,685
What we all felt
sitting in that room was that

564
00:33:38,768 --> 00:33:40,937
he would one day
be in that pantheon.

565
00:33:44,690 --> 00:33:45,692
I said, "Gentlemen,

566
00:33:45,775 --> 00:33:47,819
you won't be able
to dictate anything to me.

567
00:33:47,902 --> 00:33:50,279
I'm just gonna make something
I've never heard before."

568
00:33:50,362 --> 00:33:51,615
And the people
that I settled with

569
00:33:51,698 --> 00:33:53,909
were pretty fine with that idea.

570
00:33:53,992 --> 00:33:55,536
He was told
that it was, like,

571
00:33:55,619 --> 00:33:56,828
one of the biggest deals

572
00:33:56,911 --> 00:34:00,707
an unknown person
had ever gotten.

573
00:34:00,790 --> 00:34:03,627
He brought home the contract.
It was, like, 40 pages long.

574
00:34:03,710 --> 00:34:05,504
I'd never seen
anything like it.

575
00:34:08,047 --> 00:34:09,883
It should have been just joy,

576
00:34:09,966 --> 00:34:12,427
but I think suddenly,
things changed.

577
00:34:17,933 --> 00:34:19,101
I would come home from work

578
00:34:19,184 --> 00:34:20,853
and I'd come up
the six flights of stairs,

579
00:34:20,936 --> 00:34:23,480
and I would get to the door
and put my key in the door,

580
00:34:23,563 --> 00:34:25,565
and I'd hear him stop.

581
00:34:26,191 --> 00:34:28,068
Before the record contract,

582
00:34:28,151 --> 00:34:30,028
he would sing and play for me
all the time.

583
00:34:31,530 --> 00:34:35,200
I said to him,
"Do you need a place to work?"

584
00:34:35,283 --> 00:34:37,786
The pressure to write songs
and not be interrupted

585
00:34:37,869 --> 00:34:39,287
was so intense.

586
00:34:41,414 --> 00:34:42,832
I'm going to write...

587
00:34:44,376 --> 00:34:47,879
a hundred songs in five weeks.

588
00:34:49,130 --> 00:34:52,050
Means 20 songs a week.

589
00:34:55,512 --> 00:34:57,639
He struggled with the lyrics.

590
00:34:57,722 --> 00:35:01,393
I'm a horrible critic.
I'm my own worst critic.

591
00:35:01,476 --> 00:35:04,145
He was obsessed
with Morrissey and Dylan.

592
00:35:04,813 --> 00:35:07,691
So, he had a very high standard.

593
00:35:07,774 --> 00:35:11,152
He didn't wanna be known
as the guy who only does covers.

594
00:35:12,737 --> 00:35:14,072
My hope had been that

595
00:35:14,155 --> 00:35:15,699
we would work
on the relationship

596
00:35:15,782 --> 00:35:17,451
and live together,

597
00:35:17,534 --> 00:35:19,869
but he would find another space
where he could

598
00:35:19,953 --> 00:35:23,415
get this record contract
fulfilled.

599
00:35:23,498 --> 00:35:25,875
That was naive
to hope...

600
00:35:25,959 --> 00:35:28,628
...'cause he moved out
completely.

601
00:35:37,637 --> 00:35:38,680
People are, like, saying,

602
00:35:38,763 --> 00:35:39,932
"Look, I'll give you
all this money.

603
00:35:40,015 --> 00:35:41,683
Look, I'll be your manager,
Look, I'll be your agent.

604
00:35:41,766 --> 00:35:44,603
Look, I got this place I want
you to play. Blah, blah, blah."

605
00:35:44,686 --> 00:35:46,313
And I just wanna make
something special,

606
00:35:46,396 --> 00:35:48,023
not even care
about anything else,

607
00:35:48,106 --> 00:35:51,735
money, or prestige,
or a tour, or nothing.

608
00:35:51,818 --> 00:35:55,905
♪ There's the moon
Asking to stay ♪

609
00:35:55,989 --> 00:36:01,495
♪ Long enough for the clouds
To fly me away ♪

610
00:36:01,578 --> 00:36:03,246
Try it again.

611
00:36:05,540 --> 00:36:09,836
♪ There's the moon
Asking to stay ♪

612
00:36:09,919 --> 00:36:13,048
♪ Long enough for the clouds
To fly me away ♪

613
00:36:13,131 --> 00:36:15,425
Coming up with
a record's worth of material

614
00:36:15,508 --> 00:36:18,428
with musicians and a producer
and engineers waiting,

615
00:36:18,511 --> 00:36:20,681
and everybody is dependent on you...

616
00:36:20,764 --> 00:36:23,267
...you know, it's like,
"Tick-tock, start making magic."

617
00:36:23,350 --> 00:36:24,935
Let's try it again.

618
00:36:25,018 --> 00:36:26,645
Come into my world.

619
00:36:26,728 --> 00:36:28,272
My journals are the lyrics

620
00:36:28,355 --> 00:36:29,814
for the albums.

621
00:36:30,815 --> 00:36:32,859
The songs just come
out of poems,

622
00:36:32,942 --> 00:36:34,861
and sometimes
poems come out of dreams.

623
00:36:37,447 --> 00:36:39,324
♪ And she weeps on my arm ♪

624
00:36:39,407 --> 00:36:46,206
♪ Walking to the bright lights
In sorrow ♪

625
00:36:46,289 --> 00:36:52,253
♪ Oh, drink a bit of wine
We both might go tomorrow ♪

626
00:36:52,337 --> 00:36:55,715
This is a song called "Grace."
It's basically a death prayer.

627
00:36:58,051 --> 00:36:59,928
♪ Ooh! ♪

628
00:37:00,011 --> 00:37:01,638
I always describe it as,
you know,

629
00:37:01,721 --> 00:37:04,766
not fearing anything,
anyone, any man, any woman,

630
00:37:04,849 --> 00:37:08,895
any war, any gun,
any sling or arrow

631
00:37:08,978 --> 00:37:10,939
aimed at your heart
by other people.

632
00:37:12,691 --> 00:37:16,194
♪ It reminds me of the pain ♪

633
00:37:16,277 --> 00:37:19,906
♪ I might leave ♪

634
00:37:19,989 --> 00:37:24,202
♪ Leave behind ♪

635
00:37:24,285 --> 00:37:27,539
Because there is somebody,
finally, who loves you for real.

636
00:37:30,750 --> 00:37:33,878
You can achieve
a real state of grace

637
00:37:33,962 --> 00:37:35,669
through somebody else's love
in you.

638
00:37:46,307 --> 00:37:47,392
Jeff would say,

639
00:37:47,475 --> 00:37:49,670
"Oh, we should bring strings in
on this song."

640
00:37:51,187 --> 00:37:54,566
We had this idea
to write interesting backgrounds

641
00:37:54,649 --> 00:37:57,986
that fit the voice,
actual lines...

642
00:37:58,069 --> 00:38:00,238
you know, counter lines.

643
00:38:00,321 --> 00:38:02,574
Karl came
from the jazz world.

644
00:38:02,657 --> 00:38:04,159
He was more appealing to Jeff

645
00:38:04,242 --> 00:38:06,661
than somebody who does
pop string arrangements.

646
00:38:06,745 --> 00:38:08,913
Britney Spears would call,
and I said,

647
00:38:08,997 --> 00:38:11,290
"No, that's... You're calling
the wrong person."

648
00:38:13,376 --> 00:38:15,253
Jeff listened to Bill Evans.

649
00:38:15,336 --> 00:38:17,255
He listened to Shostakovich.

650
00:38:19,215 --> 00:38:21,176
Have you heard
of any pop singers

651
00:38:21,259 --> 00:38:24,512
even knowing
who Shostakovich is?

652
00:38:24,596 --> 00:38:27,932
♪ -♪ And the rain is falling ♪

653
00:38:28,016 --> 00:38:30,602
♪ And I believe... ♪

654
00:38:30,685 --> 00:38:31,728
It was the same way

655
00:38:31,811 --> 00:38:33,814
that Led Zeppelin
used orchestrations.

656
00:38:33,897 --> 00:38:35,607
Any orchestra leader
would have loved

657
00:38:35,690 --> 00:38:37,358
to have had their day with Jeff,

658
00:38:37,442 --> 00:38:39,903
to be able
to just go to the moon.

659
00:38:41,571 --> 00:38:46,284
People who sing high lose power.
And Jeff actually gains power.

660
00:38:46,367 --> 00:38:49,287
His range
was, like, four octaves.

661
00:38:49,370 --> 00:38:51,289
You think
you're coming to a peak,

662
00:38:51,372 --> 00:38:52,999
and then he goes
one step further

663
00:38:53,082 --> 00:38:54,626
and then he goes
another step further.

664
00:38:54,709 --> 00:38:58,213
♪ Oh! ♪

665
00:38:58,296 --> 00:39:01,925
♪ Oh! ♪

666
00:39:02,008 --> 00:39:03,760
♪ Oh! ♪

667
00:39:03,843 --> 00:39:07,430
♪ Oh, oh, oh! ♪

668
00:39:07,514 --> 00:39:10,225
♪ Yeah, whoo... ♪

669
00:39:10,308 --> 00:39:11,727
"Grace" is one of those songs

670
00:39:11,810 --> 00:39:13,520
that would inspire me
to pick up the guitar and play,

671
00:39:13,603 --> 00:39:16,105
and then I'd start to kind of...

672
00:39:16,189 --> 00:39:17,774
find something
that made me feel like that,

673
00:39:17,857 --> 00:39:20,318
and fail miserably at it,
put the guitar back.

674
00:39:20,401 --> 00:39:23,154
♪ Oh, oh! ♪

675
00:39:31,329 --> 00:39:32,497
Jeff said,

676
00:39:32,580 --> 00:39:35,250
"I want you to shoot
my album cover."

677
00:39:35,333 --> 00:39:38,253
I had all the contact sheets,
and Jeff just went...

678
00:39:39,087 --> 00:39:42,340
"Boing! That's it.
That's the cover."

679
00:39:42,423 --> 00:39:43,759
It's completely iconic.

680
00:39:43,842 --> 00:39:46,720
He already looks like
he's Sinatra.

681
00:39:46,803 --> 00:39:48,847
The folks
at the company didn't like

682
00:39:48,930 --> 00:39:50,640
the glittery gold jacket.

683
00:39:50,723 --> 00:39:53,142
"Yeah, that's
a little too effeminate."

684
00:39:53,226 --> 00:39:54,310
And Jeff's like,

685
00:39:54,394 --> 00:39:57,063
"You gave me creative control.
I choose that."

686
00:39:57,146 --> 00:40:00,441
♪ And I feel them
Drown my name ♪

687
00:40:00,525 --> 00:40:04,028
♪ So easy to know ♪

688
00:40:04,112 --> 00:40:07,866
♪ And forget with this kiss ♪

689
00:40:07,949 --> 00:40:11,452
♪ And I'm not afraid to go ♪

690
00:40:11,536 --> 00:40:12,871
♪ But it goes ♪

691
00:40:12,954 --> 00:40:19,335
♪ So slow! ♪

692
00:40:25,633 --> 00:40:27,719
Seven originals, three covers.

693
00:40:30,179 --> 00:40:32,056
♪ Wait in the fire ♪

694
00:40:32,140 --> 00:40:34,309
♪ Wait in the fire ♪

695
00:40:34,392 --> 00:40:37,478
♪ Oh, oh, oh! ♪

696
00:40:37,562 --> 00:40:39,940
He made a record
that no one else could ever

697
00:40:40,023 --> 00:40:42,400
have come close to making
as a first record.

698
00:40:42,483 --> 00:40:43,860
It's uncanny.

699
00:40:43,943 --> 00:40:46,821
Now it's like
a legendary album.

700
00:40:46,905 --> 00:40:49,699
People know me better for that
than for my own music.

701
00:40:51,826 --> 00:40:55,997
♪ Wait in the fire ♪

702
00:41:02,211 --> 00:41:04,964
-That was all right.
-It was great.

703
00:41:08,009 --> 00:41:09,218
I remember...

704
00:41:10,219 --> 00:41:12,764
putting it in the CD player
in my car...

705
00:41:17,644 --> 00:41:19,187
and I was...

706
00:41:20,438 --> 00:41:25,318
overwhelmed with the mastery,
and the musicianship...

707
00:41:26,235 --> 00:41:27,612
and the poetry.

708
00:41:29,572 --> 00:41:30,573
And, uh...

709
00:41:31,950 --> 00:41:33,910
and... and the
vocal performances...

710
00:41:35,286 --> 00:41:37,122
were beyond anything

711
00:41:37,205 --> 00:41:40,458
I had imagined
he was capable of.

712
00:41:56,140 --> 00:41:59,519
Boy!
France, Australia, UK, huge.

713
00:41:59,602 --> 00:42:02,563
Grace was huge!
It was a monster hit.

714
00:42:03,356 --> 00:42:05,358
US, moderate.

715
00:42:11,239 --> 00:42:13,867
As a child,
I lived in Los Angeles.

716
00:42:13,950 --> 00:42:16,244
I mean,
you see people getting signed,

717
00:42:16,327 --> 00:42:18,621
dreams totally inflated falsely.

718
00:42:19,622 --> 00:42:22,125
But I really admire
artists allowed to fail,

719
00:42:22,208 --> 00:42:23,292
allowed to be human,

720
00:42:23,376 --> 00:42:25,461
allowed to make
the most glorious dances

721
00:42:25,545 --> 00:42:28,214
they could ever imagine
and totally fall,

722
00:42:28,297 --> 00:42:30,299
and get back up,
'cause it's all human.

723
00:42:30,383 --> 00:42:33,219
But if you're like this side of,
you know, Danny Partridge,

724
00:42:33,302 --> 00:42:35,179
it's like...
it's totally impossible.

725
00:42:37,098 --> 00:42:39,183
It's the era of grunge.

726
00:42:39,267 --> 00:42:41,310
And Jeff was
a real counterweight to that.

727
00:42:41,394 --> 00:42:44,105
He was part
of this downtown New York scene.

728
00:42:47,608 --> 00:42:50,070
Back then,
Jeff defied genres.

729
00:42:50,153 --> 00:42:52,280
Jeff tested boundaries.

730
00:42:53,656 --> 00:42:56,534
Jeff challenged
traditional male, female roles.

731
00:42:57,493 --> 00:42:59,787
So, his music
was not easy to fit

732
00:42:59,871 --> 00:43:03,708
into the dozen radio categories.

733
00:43:08,629 --> 00:43:11,632
And yet
Jeff was also influenced

734
00:43:11,716 --> 00:43:14,343
by some of the artists
that came out

735
00:43:14,427 --> 00:43:17,013
in the late '80s and early '90s
from Seattle.

736
00:43:18,765 --> 00:43:21,559
Soundgarden was playing
in London,

737
00:43:21,642 --> 00:43:24,854
and I don't think
I quite realized

738
00:43:24,937 --> 00:43:28,608
what a huge
Soundgarden fan Jeff was.

739
00:43:28,691 --> 00:43:31,736
♪ You've been taken ♪

740
00:43:32,737 --> 00:43:34,864
Oh my goodness,
this is where he could be

741
00:43:34,947 --> 00:43:38,159
like a little... you know,
annoying brother,

742
00:43:38,242 --> 00:43:41,704
like, "You have to take me.
I'm coming with you."

743
00:43:43,790 --> 00:43:46,501
He just magically
showed up one day,

744
00:43:46,584 --> 00:43:48,753
and it was on.

745
00:43:48,836 --> 00:43:51,506
It was a beautiful,
beautiful friendship

746
00:43:51,589 --> 00:43:53,425
between he and Chris.

747
00:43:53,508 --> 00:43:56,385
There was a sense of mischief
with this...

748
00:43:57,512 --> 00:44:01,307
almost soulmate understanding.

749
00:44:01,390 --> 00:44:03,643
Chris Cornell
does it really well.

750
00:44:03,726 --> 00:44:05,937
He's, like,
one of the few people I've met

751
00:44:06,020 --> 00:44:09,774
that makes his life work,
his ordinary life,

752
00:44:09,857 --> 00:44:12,068
'cause without ordinary life,
there's no art.

753
00:44:14,946 --> 00:44:18,199
How would you
like your fans to think of you?

754
00:44:18,282 --> 00:44:20,827
Just as... Really as a guy

755
00:44:20,910 --> 00:44:23,955
that's just, like,
a really good storyteller.

756
00:44:24,038 --> 00:44:27,125
Just somebody who does
a job that they enjoy.

757
00:44:27,208 --> 00:44:29,169
Of course, it was incredible

758
00:44:29,252 --> 00:44:33,798
that so many people
reacted to his music,

759
00:44:33,881 --> 00:44:36,592
but the fame
that went along with that

760
00:44:36,676 --> 00:44:38,886
was not the fun part.

761
00:44:40,721 --> 00:44:43,724
Even when he acted confident,
it was kind of an act.

762
00:44:43,808 --> 00:44:47,061
It was him channeling that
bravely as a character,

763
00:44:47,145 --> 00:44:49,189
but I still think
that really insecure person

764
00:44:49,272 --> 00:44:50,565
was always there.

765
00:44:50,648 --> 00:44:52,025
Well, everybody
is sensitive,

766
00:44:52,108 --> 00:44:56,362
but sometimes,
men don't wanna recognize it.

767
00:44:56,445 --> 00:44:58,490
I don't even want people
to really think of me as a face

768
00:44:58,573 --> 00:45:01,701
or a name or a body
or anything, just the music,

769
00:45:01,784 --> 00:45:02,906
'cause when I'm dead...

770
00:45:04,078 --> 00:45:05,914
that's the only thing
that'll be around.

771
00:45:13,796 --> 00:45:16,174
How he was being
examined under a microscope

772
00:45:16,257 --> 00:45:17,675
was so intense,

773
00:45:17,758 --> 00:45:21,888
'cause that quality he had
to disappear in the moment...

774
00:45:23,556 --> 00:45:26,226
ultimately amounted to...

775
00:45:26,309 --> 00:45:28,477
not showing up
where I was.

776
00:45:30,771 --> 00:45:32,648
One night, he didn't come home,

777
00:45:32,732 --> 00:45:35,443
and this was Valentine's Day.

778
00:45:35,526 --> 00:45:37,070
By 3:00 or 4:00 in the morning,

779
00:45:37,153 --> 00:45:40,448
I was calling hospitals
around New York City.

780
00:45:40,531 --> 00:45:42,283
And then he just sauntered in.

781
00:45:42,992 --> 00:45:44,785
He had been out with friends.

782
00:45:46,078 --> 00:45:49,123
♪ Maybe I'm too young ♪

783
00:45:50,499 --> 00:45:54,837
♪ To keep good love
From going wrong ♪

784
00:45:55,755 --> 00:45:57,257
♪ But tonight... ♪

785
00:45:57,340 --> 00:45:59,300
Hi, Rebecca, it's nine o'clock,

786
00:45:59,383 --> 00:46:01,427
and I fucking couldn't get
into your show

787
00:46:01,510 --> 00:46:03,555
'cause I got there too close
to eight o'clock.

788
00:46:03,638 --> 00:46:06,724
I'm so disappointed.
I really wanna see you.

789
00:46:09,727 --> 00:46:13,105
♪ Too young to hold on ♪

790
00:46:14,065 --> 00:46:18,569
♪ And too old
To just break free and run ♪

791
00:46:20,780 --> 00:46:22,615
During his record-release party,

792
00:46:22,698 --> 00:46:27,579
I had a backstage pass.
He'd handwritten my name on it.

793
00:46:27,662 --> 00:46:30,957
His manager was at the door,
and he went,

794
00:46:31,040 --> 00:46:33,251
"You can't go in now.
Sit over there."

795
00:46:33,334 --> 00:46:35,920
Two hours went by.

796
00:46:36,003 --> 00:46:37,589
I went to the door
and I turned the handle,

797
00:46:37,672 --> 00:46:39,340
and I walked in...

798
00:46:39,423 --> 00:46:41,259
...and it was
a mostly empty room.

799
00:46:41,342 --> 00:46:43,886
♪ Sometimes a man
Gets carried away... ♪

800
00:46:43,970 --> 00:46:46,806
They said Jeff left,
like, over an hour ago.

801
00:46:46,889 --> 00:46:49,809
He must have gone
out a back door.

802
00:46:49,892 --> 00:46:52,019
The next morning,
he was so apologetic,

803
00:46:52,103 --> 00:46:53,938
and really upset...

804
00:46:55,481 --> 00:46:57,650
but I felt resigned.

805
00:46:58,693 --> 00:47:00,653
I didn't wanna be an appendage.

806
00:47:00,736 --> 00:47:01,821
I didn't wanna be in his world

807
00:47:01,904 --> 00:47:03,781
if he didn't really
want me there.

808
00:47:09,912 --> 00:47:14,583
♪ So, I'll wait for you
And I'll burn ♪

809
00:47:15,793 --> 00:47:19,797
♪ Will I ever see
Your sweet return? ♪

810
00:47:19,880 --> 00:47:22,175
The hard part
about letting go was like,

811
00:47:22,258 --> 00:47:25,511
"I hope
he will have good people,"

812
00:47:25,594 --> 00:47:28,222
because he didn't have
any self-protection.

813
00:47:28,306 --> 00:47:31,934
♪ It's never over ♪

814
00:47:32,018 --> 00:47:37,940
♪ She's the tear that hangs
Inside my soul forever ♪

815
00:47:41,235 --> 00:47:45,323
♪ Love, lover ♪

816
00:47:46,073 --> 00:47:52,330
♪ Love, love, oh, lover ♪

817
00:47:52,413 --> 00:47:56,250
♪ Love, love, love! ♪

818
00:47:56,334 --> 00:48:01,464
♪ Lover ♪

819
00:48:01,547 --> 00:48:06,510
♪ You should've come over ♪

820
00:48:07,970 --> 00:48:09,263
♪ 'Cause it's not ♪

821
00:48:09,347 --> 00:48:14,643
♪ Too late ♪

822
00:48:25,363 --> 00:48:27,656
When Rebecca and him split,

823
00:48:27,740 --> 00:48:31,035
he just kind of looked like
a different person for a while.

824
00:48:38,834 --> 00:48:41,379
There was a time
when I was in New York

825
00:48:41,462 --> 00:48:43,672
and we spent
some time together, and...

826
00:48:43,756 --> 00:48:45,842
♪ - ...we met at a bar.

827
00:48:45,925 --> 00:48:48,594
And this jazz band
is really loud,

828
00:48:48,677 --> 00:48:50,596
so it was impossible
for us to talk.

829
00:48:51,806 --> 00:48:56,728
We started
writing each other messages.

830
00:48:56,811 --> 00:48:59,939
For a lot of it, I think
he was trying to be seductive...

831
00:49:01,399 --> 00:49:02,608
but... ...you know,

832
00:49:02,691 --> 00:49:04,736
it was, like, really not
where I wanted to go.

833
00:49:09,198 --> 00:49:14,412
There was a very boundary-less
kind of liquid feeling to him.

834
00:49:14,495 --> 00:49:17,373
He felt very desperate
to self-medicate

835
00:49:17,456 --> 00:49:20,626
with, you know, making us
into a sexual relationship.

836
00:49:23,212 --> 00:49:25,840
I remember getting
kind of frustrated

837
00:49:25,923 --> 00:49:29,301
and writing,
"You need love, not sex."

838
00:49:31,804 --> 00:49:33,764
Generally,
I love to rush in there

839
00:49:33,848 --> 00:49:36,183
and try to fix a broken guy,

840
00:49:36,267 --> 00:49:42,106
but that liquid, watery quality
just felt very tidal-wavy.

841
00:49:45,359 --> 00:49:47,445
He was very hard on himself.

842
00:49:47,528 --> 00:49:49,655
Like, sometimes,
I got the sense that...

843
00:49:50,948 --> 00:49:54,785
he felt that there were
good and evil forces,

844
00:49:54,869 --> 00:49:56,662
you know, at play within him.

845
00:50:04,628 --> 00:50:07,006
Music, I don't know,
it'll save you.

846
00:50:07,548 --> 00:50:08,674
One, two, three!

847
00:50:12,052 --> 00:50:14,847
♪ Lover, you should come over ♪

848
00:50:14,930 --> 00:50:17,892
♪ Lover, you should've
Come over, whoo-hoo! ♪

849
00:50:17,975 --> 00:50:21,479
♪ Lover, don't forget
To bring the Coors, whoo! ♪

850
00:50:21,562 --> 00:50:25,733
Matt Johnson on drums.
Bass player, Mick Grøndahl.

851
00:50:25,816 --> 00:50:27,610
-I'm Mick Grøndahl.
-And I'm Jeff Buckley.

852
00:50:27,693 --> 00:50:29,945
And you're watching
120 Minutes on MTV.

853
00:50:30,821 --> 00:50:33,157
He asked me
to join the band too.

854
00:50:33,240 --> 00:50:35,284
Sometimes I think Jeff wanted me

855
00:50:35,367 --> 00:50:39,497
because I was a connection
to Rebecca and those memories.

856
00:50:40,456 --> 00:50:41,874
I think that it was clear

857
00:50:41,957 --> 00:50:44,710
that Michael didn't know
how to play the guitar.

858
00:50:44,793 --> 00:50:47,338
Yeah, all right,
there were tube socks.

859
00:50:47,421 --> 00:50:48,464
They were tube socks.

860
00:50:48,547 --> 00:50:50,383
But it was
about personality.

861
00:50:50,466 --> 00:50:51,592
It was about people.

862
00:50:51,675 --> 00:50:53,386
I would have
my amp really quiet.

863
00:50:53,469 --> 00:50:55,555
Jeff would slowly
turn it back up,

864
00:50:55,638 --> 00:50:57,431
you know, and I'd get all tight.

865
00:50:57,515 --> 00:50:59,851
He always told me not to be
afraid of the mistakes.

866
00:50:59,934 --> 00:51:00,976
"Don't use your brain

867
00:51:01,060 --> 00:51:03,145
the way you were using it
30 seconds ago.

868
00:51:03,229 --> 00:51:06,023
You know?
In fact, don't use it at all."

869
00:51:06,106 --> 00:51:07,650
Matt, in particular,
was just so good

870
00:51:07,733 --> 00:51:09,985
at following Jeff,
wherever Jeff was going.

871
00:51:13,531 --> 00:51:16,576
That musical chemistry they had
is very hard to come by.

872
00:51:16,659 --> 00:51:17,869
My name is Jeff Buckley,

873
00:51:17,952 --> 00:51:20,079
this is my band,
and this is our tacky abode.

874
00:51:20,162 --> 00:51:22,165
On the outside, it looks like
a huge black phallus of death.

875
00:51:22,248 --> 00:51:24,625
It's a Velcro clock.

876
00:51:24,708 --> 00:51:26,961
He's like,
"Okay, I want you."

877
00:51:27,044 --> 00:51:29,255
Until I got sober...

878
00:51:29,338 --> 00:51:32,216
...drugs and alcohol
had been a big part of my life,

879
00:51:32,299 --> 00:51:33,759
which we connected on,

880
00:51:33,842 --> 00:51:36,262
because of, you know,
his father's situation.

881
00:51:42,017 --> 00:51:43,311
It's a huge cliché

882
00:51:43,394 --> 00:51:45,271
that, you know,
bands are like families.

883
00:51:45,354 --> 00:51:47,022
But they are.

884
00:51:50,401 --> 00:51:53,529
♪ Thank you! ♪

885
00:51:56,615 --> 00:52:01,453
The infamous
American Legion Hall concert...

886
00:52:02,329 --> 00:52:06,333
was the first one
that Jeff was in town

887
00:52:06,417 --> 00:52:09,003
since he started the tour.

888
00:52:09,086 --> 00:52:12,340
All of
the relatives, the friends of the relatives,

889
00:52:12,423 --> 00:52:14,300
the relatives of the friends
of the relatives,

890
00:52:14,383 --> 00:52:15,718
all wanted to go to the concert.

891
00:52:16,885 --> 00:52:21,098
We filled
the last two rows.

892
00:52:21,181 --> 00:52:23,267
The Tasmanian Devil was...

893
00:52:23,350 --> 00:52:25,728
The... The pack showed up.

894
00:52:25,811 --> 00:52:29,440
And there was no beer left,
there was nothing left.

895
00:52:29,523 --> 00:52:30,733
Everything was,
like, wiped out...

896
00:52:30,816 --> 00:52:32,818
...before the show.

897
00:52:32,901 --> 00:52:34,070
Let's just say that

898
00:52:34,153 --> 00:52:36,322
as soon as
there was an opportunity

899
00:52:36,405 --> 00:52:38,907
to become part
of the inner circle

900
00:52:38,991 --> 00:52:43,454
of a rock star,
it was very attractive.

901
00:52:43,537 --> 00:52:47,625
The promoters came to me
and said, "We have a situation."

902
00:52:47,708 --> 00:52:50,461
I go outside, and I...

903
00:52:50,544 --> 00:52:52,547
...realize it's Jeff's mother...

904
00:52:52,630 --> 00:52:56,008
...sitting in a car with her...
one of her girlfriends,

905
00:52:56,091 --> 00:52:59,762
just smoking pot, you know,
"Hi, Gene, what's up, hey?"

906
00:52:59,845 --> 00:53:02,431
"Well, Mary, listen,
you gotta, um, you know...

907
00:53:02,514 --> 00:53:05,351
you gotta curtail this.
You're gonna get arrested."

908
00:53:05,434 --> 00:53:07,728
And I go back inside
to tell Jeff

909
00:53:07,811 --> 00:53:09,188
that the show's
gonna be canceled

910
00:53:09,271 --> 00:53:10,982
'cause his mother was outside
in the parking lot,

911
00:53:11,065 --> 00:53:13,734
smoking pot.

912
00:53:13,817 --> 00:53:16,236
Hey! Are you there?

913
00:53:16,320 --> 00:53:18,280
This is your big, sexy son.

914
00:53:18,364 --> 00:53:21,575
I think you should really not,
like, set yourself up like that,

915
00:53:21,659 --> 00:53:24,912
when you like,
fucking light up a doob,

916
00:53:25,496 --> 00:53:27,122
light up a fucking joint.

917
00:53:27,206 --> 00:53:30,209
"What? We're in the parking lot.
It's like...

918
00:53:30,292 --> 00:53:33,796
It's California. What?"
"No, no, no, no, no."

919
00:53:40,803 --> 00:53:43,847
We ended up in Iowa City,
and opening up for us

920
00:53:43,931 --> 00:53:46,726
were The Dambuilders,
and then the Grifters.

921
00:53:46,809 --> 00:53:48,144
My booking agent said

922
00:53:48,227 --> 00:53:53,065
Tim Buckley's son, Jeff,
who had taken New York by storm,

923
00:53:53,148 --> 00:53:55,484
was going to be on this tour
as the headliner.

924
00:53:57,319 --> 00:54:00,072
Joan Wasser
was one of the heavyweights

925
00:54:00,155 --> 00:54:04,410
in the music world,
being a tough-ass cool female

926
00:54:04,493 --> 00:54:08,205
coming up in the '90s
through the music scene.

927
00:54:08,288 --> 00:54:09,998
♪ Control! ♪

928
00:54:13,043 --> 00:54:14,169
♪ Wake up... ♪

929
00:54:14,253 --> 00:54:16,009
Lots of power, lots of shiny.

930
00:54:16,255 --> 00:54:18,215
You know, lots of shiny.

931
00:54:18,298 --> 00:54:23,220
When I saw him,
it was definitely a vibe.

932
00:54:23,303 --> 00:54:26,682
We were just sort of
checking each other out.

933
00:54:30,436 --> 00:54:34,815
♪ And I'll rise like an ember
In your name ♪

934
00:54:36,108 --> 00:54:39,570
Jeff stood right
in front of me the entire show

935
00:54:39,653 --> 00:54:41,071
and watched me.

936
00:54:42,823 --> 00:54:47,494
♪ I know everybody here
Wants you ♪

937
00:54:47,578 --> 00:54:48,829
He was rocking a, like,

938
00:54:48,912 --> 00:54:51,582
"I'm worshiping a goddess" vibe.

939
00:54:51,665 --> 00:54:56,044
♪ I know everybody here
Thinks they need you ♪

940
00:54:56,128 --> 00:54:58,964
♪ -Not subtle. Not subtle.

941
00:54:59,047 --> 00:55:02,718
And then hearing him,

942
00:55:02,801 --> 00:55:06,346
the thing that I thought of was,
"That's Nina Simone."

943
00:55:07,014 --> 00:55:11,935
♪ I lost myself ♪

944
00:55:12,019 --> 00:55:15,856
♪ On a cool damp night ♪

945
00:55:15,939 --> 00:55:19,652
♪ I gave myself
In that misty light ♪

946
00:55:19,735 --> 00:55:24,907
♪ I was hypnotized
By a strange delight ♪

947
00:55:24,990 --> 00:55:31,079
♪ Under a lilac tree... ♪

948
00:55:31,163 --> 00:55:33,999
He sang
the whole show to me.

949
00:55:34,708 --> 00:55:36,460
It was like...

950
00:55:36,543 --> 00:55:39,630
"Man, this guy really knows
how to work..."

951
00:55:39,713 --> 00:55:41,548
"...work me right now."

952
00:55:43,592 --> 00:55:46,303
I was feeling like,
"Oh, I got this,"

953
00:55:46,386 --> 00:55:48,889
and then being like,
"Oh, I don't got this."

954
00:55:48,972 --> 00:55:51,266
This person is too powerful.

955
00:55:51,350 --> 00:55:55,729
♪ Lilac wine ♪

956
00:55:55,813 --> 00:56:01,151
♪ Is sweet and heady ♪

957
00:56:01,944 --> 00:56:08,033
♪ Where's my love? ♪

958
00:56:10,953 --> 00:56:15,499
♪ Lilac wine ♪

959
00:56:15,582 --> 00:56:21,672
♪ I feel unsteady ♪

960
00:56:21,755 --> 00:56:28,720
♪ Where's my love? ♪

961
00:56:29,346 --> 00:56:31,515
♪ Listen to me ♪

962
00:56:31,598 --> 00:56:36,770
♪ Why is everything so hazy? ♪

963
00:56:36,854 --> 00:56:38,981
♪ Isn't that she? ♪

964
00:56:39,064 --> 00:56:41,316
♪ Or am I ♪

965
00:56:41,400 --> 00:56:48,198
♪ Just going crazy, dear? ♪

966
00:56:52,411 --> 00:56:56,498
That night,
these jocky guys

967
00:56:56,582 --> 00:56:58,166
were, like, making fun of me.

968
00:56:58,250 --> 00:57:01,211
I had this
very cartoony type of hair,

969
00:57:01,295 --> 00:57:03,380
so I was pretty used to that.

970
00:57:03,463 --> 00:57:06,133
But Jeff leapt up and said,

971
00:57:06,216 --> 00:57:09,553
"You wouldn't know a woman
if she slapped you in the face!"

972
00:57:09,636 --> 00:57:13,056
I was like, "Oh, God,
that's so romantic, I love it."

973
00:57:13,140 --> 00:57:16,101
And like, "Fuck that,
I don't need defending."

974
00:57:17,185 --> 00:57:21,565
But I came to learn
that he was someone who was...

975
00:57:21,648 --> 00:57:24,902
a really staunch defender
of women.

976
00:57:24,985 --> 00:57:27,863
♪ I feel unsteady... ♪

977
00:57:27,946 --> 00:57:29,907
All people are sensitive,

978
00:57:29,990 --> 00:57:33,660
but his sensitivity
wasn't crushed...

979
00:57:34,536 --> 00:57:38,540
like some men's sensitivity
has been.

980
00:57:39,541 --> 00:57:41,585
♪ Listen to me ♪

981
00:57:41,668 --> 00:57:43,337
It stayed intact.

982
00:57:43,420 --> 00:57:47,132
♪ I cannot see clearly
Isn't that she... ♪

983
00:57:47,215 --> 00:57:49,009
You're talking about
two amazingly talented people

984
00:57:49,092 --> 00:57:51,053
who immediately connected.

985
00:57:51,136 --> 00:57:52,763
First thing I thought of,
"Oh my God,

986
00:57:52,846 --> 00:57:56,850
they're gonna become a band,
and it's just gonna... rule."

987
00:58:02,689 --> 00:58:05,901
♪ I know how you like it
Child of mine, quick and tight ♪

988
00:58:05,984 --> 00:58:09,196
♪ Girls can't stand it
When you're doin' it right... ♪

989
00:58:09,279 --> 00:58:10,948
Jeff toured a lot.

990
00:58:11,031 --> 00:58:14,201
It was a slow growth
of that following.

991
00:58:15,535 --> 00:58:16,996
♪ Doin' it right ♪

992
00:58:17,079 --> 00:58:21,041
We toured almost
consistently for two years.

993
00:58:21,124 --> 00:58:23,419
What's life
been like since Grace came out?

994
00:58:23,502 --> 00:58:24,587
Work, work,
work, work, work.

995
00:58:24,670 --> 00:58:26,588
♪ I gotta kick 'em out! ♪

996
00:58:27,881 --> 00:58:32,678
His label,
they wanted him to be their...

997
00:58:35,055 --> 00:58:37,016
And he was like,
"Well, I have another idea

998
00:58:37,099 --> 00:58:38,517
of what that means."

999
00:58:38,600 --> 00:58:42,771
Being famous without content,
that really irks me.

1000
00:58:42,854 --> 00:58:45,148
He did get discredited
by certain, like,

1001
00:58:45,232 --> 00:58:48,694
"cool" musicians
because of the branding.

1002
00:58:48,777 --> 00:58:52,197
He was chosen to be
in People magazine's

1003
00:58:52,280 --> 00:58:54,366
"50 Most Beautiful People,"

1004
00:58:54,449 --> 00:58:55,993
or whatever the hell
that was called.

1005
00:58:56,076 --> 00:58:59,246
The poor relatives, I think
one of them walked up to him,

1006
00:58:59,329 --> 00:59:01,123
"Look, Jeff!
Look what I've got!"

1007
00:59:01,206 --> 00:59:03,375
And he took her Sharpie
and just went...

1008
00:59:05,168 --> 00:59:08,630
We went to every news stand
and bought every single one.

1009
00:59:08,714 --> 00:59:10,090
Spent hundreds of dollars

1010
00:59:10,173 --> 00:59:12,259
so that no one would see it
in his neighborhood.

1011
00:59:12,342 --> 00:59:15,095
This entire show is dedicated
to People magazine.

1012
00:59:15,178 --> 00:59:17,973
♪ Let me kick out
The jams, yeah! ♪

1013
00:59:18,056 --> 00:59:21,351
It was becoming an increasingly
stressful environment.

1014
00:59:21,435 --> 00:59:23,645
♪ Oh, I kick 'em out! ♪

1015
00:59:23,729 --> 00:59:25,314
You're very much
a public person now.

1016
00:59:25,397 --> 00:59:26,773
How does that feel?

1017
00:59:26,857 --> 00:59:30,569
Well... I'm public
with the camera,

1018
00:59:30,652 --> 00:59:32,863
but don't like TV.

1019
00:59:34,614 --> 00:59:37,242
What does your TV station
wanna know about me?

1020
00:59:47,169 --> 00:59:48,962
Once we got to Europe,

1021
00:59:49,046 --> 00:59:52,632
I remember we felt a little...
...sense of relief.

1022
01:00:00,307 --> 01:00:01,976
Jeff Buckley is being hailed

1023
01:00:02,059 --> 01:00:03,393
as the next Bob Dylan.

1024
01:00:06,980 --> 01:00:09,274
He has talent to burn,
and we recommend

1025
01:00:09,357 --> 01:00:10,967
that you give this album
a listen.

1026
01:00:13,111 --> 01:00:15,405
♪ People came there
From some... ♪

1027
01:00:15,489 --> 01:00:18,158
The album
was doing better over there.

1028
01:00:21,411 --> 01:00:24,123
Radiohead came
to a show in London

1029
01:00:24,206 --> 01:00:26,125
and was so inspired by Jeff

1030
01:00:26,208 --> 01:00:28,752
that they left the concert
and went right to the studio

1031
01:00:28,835 --> 01:00:31,004
and recorded
"Fake Plastic Trees."

1032
01:00:32,756 --> 01:00:34,674
In Paris,
we went to the opera

1033
01:00:34,758 --> 01:00:35,926
and walked along the Seine,

1034
01:00:36,009 --> 01:00:38,386
and went to every café
that we could.

1035
01:00:40,847 --> 01:00:42,432
They fell in love with him.

1036
01:00:42,516 --> 01:00:44,392
And who wouldn't fall in love

1037
01:00:44,476 --> 01:00:46,853
when you do justice
to an Édith Piaf song?

1038
01:00:50,023 --> 01:00:51,525
What about Édith Piaf?

1039
01:00:51,608 --> 01:00:56,530
-What's your attraction to her?
-To her sound, her voice.

1040
01:00:59,825 --> 01:01:02,369
Her sexiness, the romance.

1041
01:01:03,286 --> 01:01:04,955
Her tragedy.

1042
01:01:10,127 --> 01:01:12,212
No one could rock like Jeff.

1043
01:01:12,295 --> 01:01:13,922
But once you do "Hallelujah..."

1044
01:01:14,005 --> 01:01:17,092
...God help you.

1045
01:01:32,065 --> 01:01:34,359
This is for Leonard,
wherever you are.

1046
01:01:34,442 --> 01:01:36,236
And this is for Nina Simone.

1047
01:01:39,072 --> 01:01:43,410
♪ And I ♪

1048
01:01:43,493 --> 01:01:48,290
♪ Heard there was
A secret chord ♪

1049
01:01:48,373 --> 01:01:52,335
♪ That David played
And it pleased the Lord ♪

1050
01:01:52,419 --> 01:01:58,341
♪ But you don't really care
For music, do ya? ♪

1051
01:02:00,343 --> 01:02:04,514
♪ But it goes like this
The fourth, the fifth ♪

1052
01:02:04,598 --> 01:02:08,435
♪ The minor fall
And the major lift ♪

1053
01:02:08,518 --> 01:02:14,941
♪ The baffled king
Composing Hallelujah ♪

1054
01:02:15,025 --> 01:02:18,820
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1055
01:02:18,904 --> 01:02:22,199
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1056
01:02:22,866 --> 01:02:26,161
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1057
01:02:26,620 --> 01:02:33,335
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1058
01:02:41,801 --> 01:02:43,637
We were both on the road.

1059
01:02:43,720 --> 01:02:45,639
You know, it was,
like, so romantic.

1060
01:02:45,722 --> 01:02:48,391
Like, impossibly romantic.

1061
01:02:50,185 --> 01:02:56,024
But when we were together,
we created a space

1062
01:02:56,107 --> 01:03:00,487
where nothing was too scary
to talk about.

1063
01:03:02,030 --> 01:03:04,449
We both needed that so badly.

1064
01:03:05,909 --> 01:03:09,829
♪ And she tied you
To her kitchen chair ♪

1065
01:03:09,913 --> 01:03:13,792
♪ She broke your throne
And she cut your hair ♪

1066
01:03:13,875 --> 01:03:19,839
♪ And from your lips
She drew the Hallelujah ♪

1067
01:03:21,341 --> 01:03:24,344
-♪ Hallelujah ♪
-INTERVIEWER:

1068
01:03:31,685 --> 01:03:36,022
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1069
01:03:39,484 --> 01:03:41,736
My high school bullies
are undoubtedly living

1070
01:03:41,820 --> 01:03:44,156
a completely pathetic life.

1071
01:03:44,239 --> 01:03:48,118
♪ Maybe there's a God above ♪

1072
01:03:48,201 --> 01:03:51,121
♪ But all I've ever learned
From love ♪

1073
01:03:51,204 --> 01:03:57,043
♪ Was how to shoot somebody
Who outdrew ya... ♪

1074
01:03:58,169 --> 01:04:02,174
We felt like
we found the person

1075
01:04:02,257 --> 01:04:04,926
that we felt the most safe with.

1076
01:04:05,844 --> 01:04:07,971
Nothing was off-limits.

1077
01:04:08,054 --> 01:04:09,973
♪ It's a cold
And it's a broken Hallelujah ♪

1078
01:04:10,056 --> 01:04:13,476
We could just be free, really,
for the first time.

1079
01:04:13,560 --> 01:04:15,895
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1080
01:04:16,980 --> 01:04:19,691
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1081
01:04:20,650 --> 01:04:23,987
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1082
01:04:24,988 --> 01:04:31,953
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1083
01:04:52,057 --> 01:04:53,433
What is the connecting thread?

1084
01:04:53,516 --> 01:04:55,269
Because you'll do a cover
of Bad Brains

1085
01:04:55,352 --> 01:04:59,231
or of The Smiths,
or of Édith Piaf, or...

1086
01:04:59,314 --> 01:05:02,525
Hmm. Probably my mindless
hero worship.

1087
01:05:03,777 --> 01:05:05,737
♪ Hey, hey, mama said
The way you move ♪

1088
01:05:05,820 --> 01:05:08,823
♪ Gonna make you sweat
Gonna make you groove ♪

1089
01:05:08,907 --> 01:05:09,992
This is Jimmy Page,
and this is...

1090
01:05:10,075 --> 01:05:13,870
I'm Robert Plant,
and we're at the 99th festival

1091
01:05:13,953 --> 01:05:16,790
of this tour, Europennes.
And it's, uh...

1092
01:05:16,873 --> 01:05:19,584
-Sorry, "Eurockéennes."
-I don't care!

1093
01:05:19,667 --> 01:05:21,836
We're at
the Eurockéennes festival, eh?

1094
01:05:22,420 --> 01:05:23,588
Vive le rock!

1095
01:05:29,844 --> 01:05:31,263
I don't think
Jeff had ever seen

1096
01:05:31,346 --> 01:05:33,098
Page and Plant live.

1097
01:05:33,181 --> 01:05:35,350
My main
musical influences,

1098
01:05:35,433 --> 01:05:40,688
love, anger, depression, joy,
and Zeppelin.

1099
01:05:40,772 --> 01:05:42,482
It was like he was going
to Mecca or something.

1100
01:05:44,484 --> 01:05:47,070
♪ I will live my life happily
Without you... ♪

1101
01:05:47,153 --> 01:05:49,155
Backstage at the festival,

1102
01:05:49,239 --> 01:05:51,408
I felt something
over my shoulder.

1103
01:05:51,991 --> 01:05:53,159
It was like heat.

1104
01:05:54,452 --> 01:05:58,457
And I turned around,
Jeff was walking towards me.

1105
01:05:58,540 --> 01:06:00,959
He put his hand
on my shoulder, said, "Hey,

1106
01:06:01,042 --> 01:06:02,669
I love
your slide-guitar playing.

1107
01:06:02,752 --> 01:06:04,254
Could you show me
some slide-guitar stuff?"

1108
01:06:04,337 --> 01:06:08,049
And I said, "Well, Jeff,
you can probably show me

1109
01:06:08,133 --> 01:06:10,135
some... some slide-guitar stuff."

1110
01:06:10,218 --> 01:06:12,178
He said, "No, please, show me,"
you know?

1111
01:06:12,262 --> 01:06:14,556
And he said, "Hey,
Page and Plant are playing.

1112
01:06:14,639 --> 01:06:17,267
When I get off, if we go
straight there, we'll make it.

1113
01:06:17,350 --> 01:06:19,394
You know, we'll meet
at the side of the stage."

1114
01:06:19,477 --> 01:06:22,605
And we were both really excited,
obviously, to see them.

1115
01:06:27,277 --> 01:06:29,112
After Jeff's show,

1116
01:06:29,195 --> 01:06:31,490
I go around,
where I'm in the pit.

1117
01:06:35,076 --> 01:06:36,953
We're looking for Jeff
constantly.

1118
01:06:39,330 --> 01:06:42,013
Trying to watch the show.
We're trying to look for Jeff.

1119
01:06:42,792 --> 01:06:44,127
We looked up.

1120
01:06:45,545 --> 01:06:47,380
He's just out of my periphery.

1121
01:06:49,048 --> 01:06:51,217
"Oh, shit!"

1122
01:06:51,301 --> 01:06:53,803
There's Jeff,
hanging all the way up,

1123
01:06:53,887 --> 01:06:55,180
off the scaffolding.

1124
01:06:57,515 --> 01:06:59,684
Zeppelin is at full throttle,

1125
01:06:59,767 --> 01:07:04,939
and Jeff is, with every decibel

1126
01:07:05,023 --> 01:07:07,150
coursing through his veins...

1127
01:07:07,233 --> 01:07:09,194
You can call it death-defying.

1128
01:07:13,573 --> 01:07:16,618
♪ Oh-oh! ♪

1129
01:07:16,701 --> 01:07:17,994
The volume of music

1130
01:07:18,077 --> 01:07:20,121
as it passes into your body

1131
01:07:20,205 --> 01:07:23,667
turns you into an instrument
that your own ears hear.

1132
01:07:23,750 --> 01:07:26,586
There's a great deal of comfort,
in the same way

1133
01:07:26,669 --> 01:07:29,589
that a baby's greatly comforted
by their mother.

1134
01:07:32,509 --> 01:07:35,762
He looked at us and gave us
a wave, like... like...

1135
01:07:36,888 --> 01:07:39,474
said, like, "Come on up!"

1136
01:07:39,557 --> 01:07:41,726
Like, "The water's warm."

1137
01:07:45,563 --> 01:07:49,401
Music, it was my mother,
it was my father.

1138
01:07:57,951 --> 01:07:59,702
When he was
back in New York,

1139
01:07:59,786 --> 01:08:02,789
we went and saw
Nusrat play at Town Hall.

1140
01:08:06,584 --> 01:08:09,378
After the show,
we went backstage.

1141
01:08:09,461 --> 01:08:12,591
Nusrat, very, like, placid.

1142
01:08:12,674 --> 01:08:16,720
And here was this, like,
bouncing-around Jeff.

1143
01:08:16,803 --> 01:08:18,637
Nusrat did not speak
any English,

1144
01:08:18,720 --> 01:08:20,222
and Jeff was trying
to connect with him,

1145
01:08:20,305 --> 01:08:23,100
and then
he just started s... Oh!

1146
01:08:36,823 --> 01:08:38,908
Nusrat, like,
looked at him, like...

1147
01:08:40,451 --> 01:08:42,329
"What the fuck is going on?"

1148
01:08:47,792 --> 01:08:49,877
This smile came on his face,

1149
01:08:49,961 --> 01:08:53,590
and it was just
instant respect and love.

1150
01:08:56,676 --> 01:08:58,720
That is a universal language.

1151
01:09:01,848 --> 01:09:03,767
I didn't only
just listen to things.

1152
01:09:03,850 --> 01:09:07,686
I totally, absolutely
lionized everybody

1153
01:09:07,769 --> 01:09:09,396
having anything to do with it.

1154
01:09:11,649 --> 01:09:16,655
Some of Jeff's heroes
eventually became fans of him.

1155
01:09:16,738 --> 01:09:19,491
I was at a show at Roseland
where Paul McCartney

1156
01:09:19,574 --> 01:09:23,036
and Linda McCartney came,
and it was just amazing.

1157
01:09:23,119 --> 01:09:24,329
There's this one shot

1158
01:09:24,412 --> 01:09:26,039
where he's looking at me,
going like...

1159
01:09:26,122 --> 01:09:28,166
..."Can you believe it?"

1160
01:09:29,042 --> 01:09:30,961
But some of those heroes

1161
01:09:31,044 --> 01:09:34,130
also recognized
his father's work as well.

1162
01:09:34,213 --> 01:09:37,216
That was difficult for him,
'cause, like, Linda McCartney

1163
01:09:37,300 --> 01:09:39,719
knew his father better
than he did.

1164
01:09:43,473 --> 01:09:46,253
In these situations,
I'm hoping that I'm understood.

1165
01:09:47,685 --> 01:09:49,636
But with comparisons,
I'm not understood.

1166
01:09:50,146 --> 01:09:51,564
I have my own way.

1167
01:09:52,690 --> 01:09:53,941
Jeff would buy

1168
01:09:54,025 --> 01:09:57,111
all of Tim's CDs
at Tower Records,

1169
01:09:57,195 --> 01:10:00,490
listen to them,
and then throw them out.

1170
01:10:02,992 --> 01:10:04,827
♪ Levee's gonna break ♪

1171
01:10:04,911 --> 01:10:06,955
Led Zeppelin
was being inducted in '95

1172
01:10:07,038 --> 01:10:08,248
into the Rock and Roll
Hall of Fame.

1173
01:10:08,331 --> 01:10:09,916
♪ If it keeps on rainin'... ♪

1174
01:10:09,999 --> 01:10:12,752
I'd never seen Jeff
so starstruck.

1175
01:10:13,628 --> 01:10:15,380
And he just started pointing,

1176
01:10:15,463 --> 01:10:18,841
"You're the one that's been
in my head all these years.

1177
01:10:19,384 --> 01:10:20,677
It's you!"

1178
01:10:22,303 --> 01:10:24,347
At one point
during the evening,

1179
01:10:24,430 --> 01:10:27,266
Robert Plant said something
to Jeff, like,

1180
01:10:27,350 --> 01:10:29,545
"You're the greatest new singer
in the world."

1181
01:10:30,728 --> 01:10:35,025
It freaked Jeff out.
He turned white.

1182
01:10:35,108 --> 01:10:38,611
Got up, I don't know
what he did, where he went,

1183
01:10:38,695 --> 01:10:40,739
but he was missing
for, like, two days.

1184
01:10:40,822 --> 01:10:42,699
Hi, it's me.

1185
01:10:42,782 --> 01:10:45,076
Where you've been?
Where are you?

1186
01:10:45,159 --> 01:10:46,244
Hi, Jeff.

1187
01:10:46,327 --> 01:10:48,788
I haven't heard from you.
I assume you're blowing me off.

1188
01:10:48,871 --> 01:10:50,498
It's like you've disappeared.

1189
01:10:50,581 --> 01:10:51,708
Where could you be?

1190
01:10:51,791 --> 01:10:53,376
Where could you be right now?

1191
01:10:53,459 --> 01:10:56,629
♪ This is your mom
You can call me ♪

1192
01:11:00,049 --> 01:11:02,176
♪ I need to hear from you now ♪

1193
01:11:02,260 --> 01:11:04,929
I noticed
Jeff's depression

1194
01:11:05,012 --> 01:11:06,389
started to kick in.

1195
01:11:06,472 --> 01:11:08,433
Your mailbox is full.

1196
01:11:09,475 --> 01:11:11,227
There was so much on his mind,

1197
01:11:11,310 --> 01:11:14,647
but he wasn't talking about it.
And he just felt heavy.

1198
01:11:28,369 --> 01:11:29,662
We all, like,

1199
01:11:29,746 --> 01:11:32,874
experimented
with taking drugs and stuff.

1200
01:11:32,957 --> 01:11:35,418
It was sometimes a bit crazy,
but, like...

1201
01:11:35,501 --> 01:11:39,130
he def... I never got, like,
an addict vibe from him at all.

1202
01:11:39,213 --> 01:11:41,883
Yeah, there was
dipping and dabbling and stuff.

1203
01:11:42,592 --> 01:11:44,010
Some more than others.

1204
01:11:45,344 --> 01:11:47,097
I teach you no more karate,
you little...

1205
01:11:47,180 --> 01:11:48,848
But I couldn't be around it.

1206
01:11:50,266 --> 01:11:53,269
Next year then, will that mean
a new Jeff Buckley album?

1207
01:11:53,352 --> 01:11:54,604
I have to work on it this year.

1208
01:11:54,687 --> 01:11:57,774
-Mm.
-So, something will be out...

1209
01:11:57,857 --> 01:12:00,526
No, you know what?
I can't make any promises now.

1210
01:12:00,610 --> 01:12:02,612
I'll be a corpse
by then.

1211
01:12:04,489 --> 01:12:06,491
Ladies and gentlemen,
Jeff Buckley.

1212
01:12:06,574 --> 01:12:07,784
It's a great... Thank you, sir.

1213
01:12:10,578 --> 01:12:13,289
I feel like, as his fame grew,

1214
01:12:13,372 --> 01:12:17,502
the demands of success
started to irritate him.

1215
01:12:18,628 --> 01:12:20,338
The label was kind of
breathing down his back

1216
01:12:20,421 --> 01:12:22,674
for the second album.

1217
01:12:22,757 --> 01:12:27,720
I think he was weighed down
by the debt that he owed them.

1218
01:12:27,804 --> 01:12:31,557
Millions of dollars
in debt with no hits

1219
01:12:31,641 --> 01:12:33,893
on your next record yet.

1220
01:12:33,976 --> 01:12:36,271
Well, you're never
gonna get out of the hole.

1221
01:12:36,354 --> 01:12:40,316
No one ever gets out
of owing a record label money

1222
01:12:40,399 --> 01:12:42,058
because that's how
it's structured.

1223
01:12:43,277 --> 01:12:47,907
That probably
would've been very scary

1224
01:12:47,990 --> 01:12:50,201
to Jeff, and maybe he thought

1225
01:12:50,284 --> 01:12:53,830
that the type of deal
that he had

1226
01:12:53,913 --> 01:12:57,250
may have been a little bit of
a deal with the devil sometimes.

1227
01:12:57,333 --> 01:12:58,835
That's your bed.

1228
01:12:58,918 --> 01:13:01,254
And you made it,
and you have to lie in it.

1229
01:13:01,337 --> 01:13:05,675
Jeff started to spiral
around this fear that he has

1230
01:13:05,758 --> 01:13:08,594
of the loss
of his artistic freedom.

1231
01:13:08,678 --> 01:13:10,138
Columbia Records' meetings

1232
01:13:10,221 --> 01:13:11,597
would be very...

1233
01:13:13,432 --> 01:13:14,726
full of pressure, you know,

1234
01:13:14,809 --> 01:13:17,061
when Jeff
didn't want to do something.

1235
01:13:17,144 --> 01:13:19,605
Every parasite needs its host,
and we are them.

1236
01:13:19,689 --> 01:13:21,774
-I'm Jeff Buckley.
-And I'm Michael Tighe.

1237
01:13:21,858 --> 01:13:23,735
We've been
guest-parasite hosting tonight.

1238
01:13:26,863 --> 01:13:29,365
The label wanted
the next record to come out,

1239
01:13:29,448 --> 01:13:31,701
but they were still touring.

1240
01:13:31,784 --> 01:13:34,704
"Make another... album."

1241
01:13:34,787 --> 01:13:38,249
"Please." Oh my God.

1242
01:13:41,252 --> 01:13:43,296
You've taken
your time, haven't you?

1243
01:13:43,379 --> 01:13:44,464
I mean, you haven't rushed

1244
01:13:44,547 --> 01:13:46,799
into recording
the follow-up album.

1245
01:13:46,883 --> 01:13:48,510
Only because
of being on the road so long.

1246
01:13:48,593 --> 01:13:50,220
Do you
anticipate that it's gonna take

1247
01:13:50,303 --> 01:13:52,222
-months and months and months?
-If it takes any longer,

1248
01:13:52,305 --> 01:13:54,473
you'll find me swinging
from a noose.

1249
01:13:54,557 --> 01:13:57,643
Get in the van,
eight hours a day, every day,

1250
01:13:57,727 --> 01:13:59,395
for, like,
two and a half years, bro.

1251
01:13:59,478 --> 01:14:02,106
Like, can I just have
some fucking space?

1252
01:14:02,189 --> 01:14:05,484
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh! ♪

1253
01:14:09,071 --> 01:14:12,450
Then? I was nuts.
I was fucking nuts.

1254
01:14:13,075 --> 01:14:14,744
And the last thing I need

1255
01:14:14,827 --> 01:14:18,080
is another nuts motherfucker
next to me.

1256
01:14:19,332 --> 01:14:23,544
All right! And obviously,
Jesus on the drums.

1257
01:14:24,128 --> 01:14:25,338
Thank you!

1258
01:14:27,173 --> 01:14:29,217
You could really feel
the disconnect

1259
01:14:29,300 --> 01:14:31,093
between Jeff and Matt.

1260
01:14:32,386 --> 01:14:34,430
And I think Jeff felt...

1261
01:14:34,513 --> 01:14:36,974
like he was being abandoned
by a brother.

1262
01:14:38,434 --> 01:14:41,980
♪ Sometimes I feel
Like I don't have a partner ♪

1263
01:14:46,025 --> 01:14:47,151
So, Matty quit the band,

1264
01:14:47,234 --> 01:14:48,653
said he was done.

1265
01:14:51,072 --> 01:14:54,492
I myself am erratic.
Music is erratic.

1266
01:14:54,575 --> 01:14:56,619
If people look upon music

1267
01:14:56,702 --> 01:14:58,496
as something
to have control over

1268
01:14:58,579 --> 01:15:02,333
or something to be...
...uniform and predictable,

1269
01:15:02,416 --> 01:15:04,377
then it's their funeral.

1270
01:15:06,379 --> 01:15:08,381
I'm gonna come home.

1271
01:15:09,048 --> 01:15:10,049
I'll record, definitely.

1272
01:15:10,132 --> 01:15:11,259
I just wanna come home
and experiment

1273
01:15:11,342 --> 01:15:12,802
and get all these ideas out.

1274
01:15:16,180 --> 01:15:18,099
Where would you
like to see yourself

1275
01:15:18,182 --> 01:15:19,851
in ten years...
ten years from now?

1276
01:15:19,934 --> 01:15:22,269
I don't see myself
ten years from now. At all.

1277
01:15:26,565 --> 01:15:27,942
"I just don't."

1278
01:15:29,110 --> 01:15:32,655
Just a blank movie screen.
Just a void.

1279
01:15:33,572 --> 01:15:34,782
What can I tell you?

1280
01:15:38,911 --> 01:15:43,249
I heard Grace
in the summer of '96,

1281
01:15:43,332 --> 01:15:46,961
and within two weeks,
I would meet Jeff.

1282
01:15:47,044 --> 01:15:50,006
"We need a drummer. We'd love...
You come try out."

1283
01:15:50,089 --> 01:15:51,590
♪ Oh, you and I... ♪

1284
01:15:51,674 --> 01:15:55,594
Jeff had so much...
fear around this record.

1285
01:15:56,220 --> 01:15:57,388
He wasn't ready.

1286
01:15:58,556 --> 01:16:00,766
He is questioning everything.

1287
01:16:00,850 --> 01:16:04,896
"Was the first album a fluke?
Am I an imposter?"

1288
01:16:07,690 --> 01:16:12,862
Grace was a compilation
of everything that he had done

1289
01:16:12,945 --> 01:16:14,780
until he was 27.

1290
01:16:14,864 --> 01:16:18,117
You wonder,
"Do I have another record in me?

1291
01:16:18,200 --> 01:16:20,369
Do I need another 27 years?"

1292
01:16:20,453 --> 01:16:22,580
Then you have
the record company guys

1293
01:16:22,663 --> 01:16:25,750
coming down to check in on us
and see our progress.

1294
01:16:25,833 --> 01:16:28,461
I was like,
"Are you kidding me?"

1295
01:16:28,544 --> 01:16:31,714
We wanted to be able
to supply the inspiration

1296
01:16:31,797 --> 01:16:33,508
that would get him
to the next level,

1297
01:16:33,591 --> 01:16:36,302
but I think he felt
he had to do that on his own.

1298
01:16:36,385 --> 01:16:42,349
♪ Sleeping with his arms
Around the hips of fate ♪

1299
01:16:42,433 --> 01:16:46,979
♪ And his tears
Scattered 'round the world ♪

1300
01:16:47,063 --> 01:16:52,276
♪ Angel, go give him
His dreams ♪

1301
01:16:52,359 --> 01:16:59,075
♪ And my cold, black visions ♪

1302
01:17:01,368 --> 01:17:03,996
So many of the people
he admired had...

1303
01:17:04,830 --> 01:17:06,457
somehow self-destructed.

1304
01:17:07,374 --> 01:17:08,793
People think that, mm...

1305
01:17:10,044 --> 01:17:14,924
my father and the EP
is all there is to talk about.

1306
01:17:15,007 --> 01:17:17,635
And then to have Jeff
come from a father

1307
01:17:17,718 --> 01:17:19,637
who had died young,

1308
01:17:19,720 --> 01:17:22,389
he was really trying
to be healthier.

1309
01:17:23,682 --> 01:17:25,684
On his 29th birthday,

1310
01:17:25,768 --> 01:17:29,188
Jeff turned to me and said,
"I've now outlived my father."

1311
01:17:29,271 --> 01:17:33,359
It was a really strange reality
for him to face.

1312
01:17:33,442 --> 01:17:36,737
♪ Eyes to the burning... ♪

1313
01:17:37,988 --> 01:17:41,951
He said, "I have to
tell you something about me."

1314
01:17:42,993 --> 01:17:44,703
I'm not gonna last that long.

1315
01:17:47,331 --> 01:17:50,417
I just have to tell you
what it feels like,

1316
01:17:50,501 --> 01:17:52,002
"because I wanna warn you."

1317
01:17:53,129 --> 01:17:55,589
And I said,
"I'm not going anywhere."

1318
01:17:58,217 --> 01:18:00,678
And because
of his father dying...

1319
01:18:02,429 --> 01:18:05,099
...I thought,
"Of course you think that.

1320
01:18:05,182 --> 01:18:07,184
That makes
all the sense in the world."

1321
01:18:16,360 --> 01:18:20,573
♪ Don't be like the one
Who made me so old ♪

1322
01:18:20,656 --> 01:18:25,703
♪ Don't be like the one
Who left behind his name ♪

1323
01:18:25,786 --> 01:18:30,833
♪ 'Cause they're waiting for you
Like I waited for mine ♪

1324
01:18:30,916 --> 01:18:34,170
♪ And nobody ever came ♪

1325
01:18:34,253 --> 01:18:41,093
♪ Nobody ever... ♪

1326
01:18:46,765 --> 01:18:49,643
At the end of three years
of touring, who do you know?

1327
01:18:50,269 --> 01:18:52,563
What sort of life do you have?

1328
01:18:52,646 --> 01:18:55,024
It's a little corrosive
and a little frustrating.

1329
01:18:55,107 --> 01:18:57,193
And that's why
I have to go away.

1330
01:18:58,444 --> 01:19:00,738
I have to find someplace
and really sink into it.

1331
01:19:21,634 --> 01:19:24,303
Jeff found this house
on Rembert Street.

1332
01:19:27,097 --> 01:19:33,395
He didn't have a lawnmower,
so it became overgrown.

1333
01:19:35,272 --> 01:19:38,275
I would visit him
for a week a month.

1334
01:19:41,362 --> 01:19:45,991
I remember lying with him
in the grass.

1335
01:19:49,536 --> 01:19:51,038
No one could see us.

1336
01:19:52,414 --> 01:19:53,916
Joan had said to me,

1337
01:19:53,999 --> 01:19:57,169
"Take care of Jeff.
Keep his feet on the ground,"

1338
01:19:57,253 --> 01:19:58,754
and I took that seriously.

1339
01:20:01,507 --> 01:20:06,345
There seemed to be...
some normalcy, some grounding.

1340
01:20:06,428 --> 01:20:08,514
-Some cooking.
-Some cooking, food.

1341
01:20:09,473 --> 01:20:12,184
And I feel
that Jeff came here

1342
01:20:12,268 --> 01:20:15,604
where there's not as much
external stimulation...

1343
01:20:17,064 --> 01:20:19,275
in order to process...

1344
01:20:21,443 --> 01:20:23,988
and not just to create.

1345
01:20:24,071 --> 01:20:30,244
♪ Take the pain
Until it all rings hollow ♪

1346
01:20:32,162 --> 01:20:34,207
Without ordinary life,
there's no art.

1347
01:20:37,334 --> 01:20:41,964
Balanced meals, reading,
sleeping, relationships.

1348
01:20:43,966 --> 01:20:48,053
♪ Lilac wine ♪

1349
01:20:48,137 --> 01:20:49,221
Love.

1350
01:20:51,348 --> 01:20:57,355
♪ I feel I'm ready... ♪

1351
01:20:57,438 --> 01:21:00,107
It felt like
he felt safe there.

1352
01:21:02,276 --> 01:21:05,446
He would wear my dresses
in the house sometimes,

1353
01:21:06,113 --> 01:21:07,698
and loved wearing them.

1354
01:21:09,283 --> 01:21:11,994
He just wanted to be anonymous

1355
01:21:12,077 --> 01:21:15,998
and be able to talk to anybody
in the bookstore,

1356
01:21:16,081 --> 01:21:19,335
not worrying
if they were talking to him

1357
01:21:19,418 --> 01:21:21,170
because they knew who he was.

1358
01:21:29,303 --> 01:21:32,056
Early one morning,
I went to pick him up,

1359
01:21:32,765 --> 01:21:34,767
and he was crying.

1360
01:21:34,850 --> 01:21:37,103
I said, "Do you wanna talk about
what's going on?"

1361
01:21:37,186 --> 01:21:40,272
And he said
it had to do with his mom.

1362
01:21:40,356 --> 01:21:43,067
Yeah, well...

1363
01:21:44,735 --> 01:21:47,321
One day, I went to visit
a friend in Los Angeles.

1364
01:21:47,404 --> 01:21:49,615
I didn't have Internet
at the time.

1365
01:21:49,698 --> 01:21:52,117
And she had a computer
all set up, and she says,

1366
01:21:52,201 --> 01:21:55,246
"Oh, you know, here's
a chat room all about Jeff."

1367
01:21:55,329 --> 01:21:57,498
So, I sat there and read
some of the comments,

1368
01:21:57,581 --> 01:21:59,417
and they were
just a bunch of bullshit.

1369
01:22:01,001 --> 01:22:03,379
So I said,
"Hi, I'm his mom.

1370
01:22:03,462 --> 01:22:05,964
I want you to know
none of that is true."

1371
01:22:06,548 --> 01:22:07,674
Well...

1372
01:22:09,593 --> 01:22:11,512
that did not go over well.

1373
01:22:11,595 --> 01:22:14,432
It got back to his manager
that I was,

1374
01:22:14,515 --> 01:22:17,142
you know,
"dealing with the fan club"

1375
01:22:17,226 --> 01:22:19,812
and saying things
that he didn't want me to say,

1376
01:22:19,895 --> 01:22:22,856
et cetera, et cetera,
and he got really pissed at me.

1377
01:22:24,233 --> 01:22:25,526
Hey, Mama.

1378
01:22:25,609 --> 01:22:28,654
You've gotta
fucking grow up, all right?

1379
01:22:28,737 --> 01:22:31,782
You can't be a girl anymore, Ma,
you gotta be a woman.

1380
01:22:32,366 --> 01:22:33,534
I had to be the man.

1381
01:22:33,617 --> 01:22:35,536
I had to be the man
in your house.

1382
01:22:37,329 --> 01:22:40,833
Just get the anger and the pain
that was rested upon you.

1383
01:22:40,916 --> 01:22:43,377
You get rid of that shit.

1384
01:22:43,460 --> 01:22:45,296
'Cause that's in me.

1385
01:22:45,379 --> 01:22:48,215
Everything you experienced
at home, it's in me.

1386
01:22:55,013 --> 01:22:57,099
We never had a "falling out."

1387
01:22:58,016 --> 01:22:59,685
And it was serious.

1388
01:22:59,768 --> 01:23:01,729
And we didn't spend Christmas
together that year.

1389
01:23:01,812 --> 01:23:05,649
He went to Northern California
and spent it with his stepdad.

1390
01:23:14,283 --> 01:23:18,704
Jeff got real serious
and turned, took my hands,

1391
01:23:18,787 --> 01:23:22,207
looked down, very dejected,

1392
01:23:22,291 --> 01:23:25,586
and said very quietly,
"I don't know how to be a man."

1393
01:23:39,016 --> 01:23:41,768
He was looking
at who raised him

1394
01:23:41,852 --> 01:23:44,563
and formed his ability

1395
01:23:44,646 --> 01:23:47,357
to deal with life
on a day-to-day basis.

1396
01:23:48,275 --> 01:23:51,236
He was looking
for answers, really,

1397
01:23:51,945 --> 01:23:53,906
from a ghost, from his father.

1398
01:24:01,371 --> 01:24:05,125
♪ Once I was a soldier ♪

1399
01:24:07,294 --> 01:24:11,298
♪ And I fought
On foreign sands for you ♪

1400
01:24:11,381 --> 01:24:14,801
Jeff could shift gears,
though, very quickly.

1401
01:24:19,806 --> 01:24:22,518
His mind worked like a... radio

1402
01:24:22,601 --> 01:24:25,854
that was tuned
to all frequencies at once.

1403
01:24:25,938 --> 01:24:29,316
♪  ♪ -

1404
01:24:30,651 --> 01:24:32,945
♪ Manic depression... ♪

1405
01:24:34,279 --> 01:24:37,658
How you doin'? Hi. Hi. Hello.

1406
01:24:38,867 --> 01:24:40,870
I wanted to, uh...

1407
01:24:40,953 --> 01:24:44,248
share a little bit
of what's happening with me.

1408
01:24:45,374 --> 01:24:47,126
We're in big trouble over here.

1409
01:24:48,460 --> 01:24:52,839
He said, "I realized something.
I think I'm manic depressive."

1410
01:24:54,049 --> 01:24:55,217
I didn't know what that meant.

1411
01:24:55,300 --> 01:24:57,386
I thought immediately
of the Jimi Hendrix song.

1412
01:25:00,097 --> 01:25:04,768
We know so much now about
chemical imbalances and stuff.

1413
01:25:04,851 --> 01:25:09,607
And we just...
I didn't, and nobody did then.

1414
01:25:14,403 --> 01:25:16,572
He was
in a really heightened state

1415
01:25:16,655 --> 01:25:20,284
and was having
really disturbing visions,

1416
01:25:20,909 --> 01:25:23,495
like visiting the devil.

1417
01:25:23,579 --> 01:25:25,581
He took me into the attic.

1418
01:25:25,664 --> 01:25:29,001
There was a dead bird
laying on the floor

1419
01:25:29,084 --> 01:25:31,044
and his black skull candle.

1420
01:25:33,297 --> 01:25:35,591
He sent a fax
to the office and he's like,

1421
01:25:35,674 --> 01:25:37,759
"I got the cover
for the next album."

1422
01:25:40,721 --> 01:25:43,515
We comment,
"And this is too X-rated.

1423
01:25:43,599 --> 01:25:45,392
We can't send this to Sony."

1424
01:25:45,475 --> 01:25:48,437
He said that he dreamed
he had a brain tumor

1425
01:25:48,520 --> 01:25:52,024
and he thought
that he was going to die.

1426
01:25:52,107 --> 01:25:55,319
It was what I understand now

1427
01:25:55,402 --> 01:25:57,738
to be a psychotic break.

1428
01:25:57,821 --> 01:25:59,657
The same thing
was going on with Hendrix

1429
01:25:59,740 --> 01:26:01,575
and Joplin and Morrison.

1430
01:26:01,658 --> 01:26:04,077
Chemical imbalance mixed
with some sort of trauma

1431
01:26:04,161 --> 01:26:07,122
that's only sustainable
for so much time,

1432
01:26:07,205 --> 01:26:10,083
until either it gets fixed
or it fixes you.

1433
01:26:11,335 --> 01:26:12,920
I'll never forget,
he always said,

1434
01:26:13,003 --> 01:26:14,505
"I'm not gonna end up

1435
01:26:14,588 --> 01:26:17,299
like my father,
with a tag on my toe."

1436
01:26:24,723 --> 01:26:26,809
Jeff had gone
to the zoo numerous times

1437
01:26:26,892 --> 01:26:29,645
and loved the butterfly house.

1438
01:26:34,858 --> 01:26:36,485
But he felt like the guy

1439
01:26:36,568 --> 01:26:41,156
working in the butterfly house
was mistreating the chrysalis.

1440
01:26:42,658 --> 01:26:46,036
He felt he could be more gentle.

1441
01:26:50,624 --> 01:26:52,710
Hi, Rebecca. It's Jeff.

1442
01:26:52,793 --> 01:26:56,546
Sweet dreams, and, uh,
play lots of music.

1443
01:26:57,214 --> 01:26:59,049
Sing beautiful songs.

1444
01:27:00,258 --> 01:27:02,969
The last conversation we had,

1445
01:27:03,053 --> 01:27:05,597
he woke me up with a phone call.

1446
01:27:12,562 --> 01:27:15,399
He was wanting
to clarify the past.

1447
01:27:15,482 --> 01:27:21,947
♪ And in that orchard
There was a hold ♪

1448
01:27:22,030 --> 01:27:23,396
He was apologizing.

1449
01:27:24,741 --> 01:27:28,662
I remember saying...
"It takes two, you know,

1450
01:27:28,745 --> 01:27:31,915
to mess things up
the way we did, and this is...

1451
01:27:31,998 --> 01:27:33,917
It's all good."

1452
01:27:34,000 --> 01:27:36,086
He said he was doing work
on his childhood

1453
01:27:36,169 --> 01:27:39,423
and that they were looking
for someone to help him,

1454
01:27:39,506 --> 01:27:41,299
presumably a counselor.

1455
01:27:41,383 --> 01:27:43,969
I'm gonna work my ass off, baby.

1456
01:27:44,052 --> 01:27:46,138
I'll, uh, I'll see you
on the other side.

1457
01:27:47,723 --> 01:27:50,434
For, like, two weeks,
he, like, just called

1458
01:27:50,517 --> 01:27:54,730
everybody he knew,
just to, like, have... contact.

1459
01:27:58,984 --> 01:28:01,570
I remembered him
calling me and saying,

1460
01:28:01,653 --> 01:28:04,740
"I realized that you were right
about stuff and..."

1461
01:28:04,823 --> 01:28:07,909
You know, I wasn't even sure
what he meant by that

1462
01:28:07,993 --> 01:28:10,495
and I didn't know
how to follow it up, and...

1463
01:28:11,705 --> 01:28:12,706
it's sad.

1464
01:28:14,958 --> 01:28:18,837
Jeff was very quiet
and didn't say anything.

1465
01:28:19,796 --> 01:28:21,965
I told him I loved him.

1466
01:28:22,048 --> 01:28:27,053
♪ And in that orchard
There was a hold ♪

1467
01:28:27,137 --> 01:28:31,933
I said to him, "I have photos
of you from your childhood.

1468
01:28:32,017 --> 01:28:35,353
Would you like me
to send them to you?"

1469
01:28:35,437 --> 01:28:39,107
And like in a really soft voice,
he said, "I'd like that."

1470
01:28:41,067 --> 01:28:45,322
I said, "You just got to
let go and not care...

1471
01:28:46,615 --> 01:28:48,742
if mistakes are made."

1472
01:29:04,716 --> 01:29:11,014
Barristers became
his second Sin-e of a kind

1473
01:29:11,097 --> 01:29:14,518
where he could go
and work out music...

1474
01:29:15,101 --> 01:29:16,645
♪ Fall in light... ♪

1475
01:29:16,728 --> 01:29:20,774
...without having
the entirety of, say,

1476
01:29:20,857 --> 01:29:23,068
New York City find out about it.

1477
01:29:24,194 --> 01:29:26,864
♪ Feel no shame
For what you are... ♪

1478
01:29:26,947 --> 01:29:29,157
I have been
everything on stage.

1479
01:29:29,241 --> 01:29:30,868
I've been wrong.
I've been completely ugly.

1480
01:29:30,951 --> 01:29:33,370
I've been stupid.
I've been angry.

1481
01:29:33,453 --> 01:29:35,121
I've been totally in love.

1482
01:29:35,205 --> 01:29:37,708
I've been beautiful.
I've been hideous.

1483
01:29:37,791 --> 01:29:39,501
I've... I've lost my pants.

1484
01:29:40,460 --> 01:29:43,672
Uh. But I've never been bored.

1485
01:29:43,755 --> 01:29:46,925
I've never been dead on stage.
I've never been dead.

1486
01:29:48,426 --> 01:29:51,263
♪ Feel no shame
For what you are... ♪

1487
01:29:51,346 --> 01:29:52,931
He left that
on my answering machine.

1488
01:29:53,014 --> 01:29:54,892
"Michael,
it's starting to click.

1489
01:29:54,975 --> 01:29:58,562
It's starting to feel like
the way the Grace songs felt."

1490
01:29:58,645 --> 01:30:01,982
♪ Fall in light... ♪

1491
01:30:02,065 --> 01:30:04,526
He hadn't played anyone
any of it.

1492
01:30:04,609 --> 01:30:08,739
His band was joining him
really soon

1493
01:30:08,822 --> 01:30:11,867
to start recording the record.

1494
01:30:11,950 --> 01:30:14,369
Just sometimes a song
gets into you, and...

1495
01:30:14,452 --> 01:30:16,246
and just gets into you.

1496
01:30:16,329 --> 01:30:18,248
You know, it just happens to you
in a moment.

1497
01:30:21,126 --> 01:30:23,858
Me, Michael, and Mick
each got a four-track tape.

1498
01:30:24,963 --> 01:30:28,383
♪ Twenty-nine pearls
In your kiss ♪

1499
01:30:28,466 --> 01:30:30,468
♪ A singing smile ♪

1500
01:30:30,552 --> 01:30:35,974
♪ Coffee smell and lilac skin
Your flame in me ♪

1501
01:30:36,057 --> 01:30:40,186
I could feel that those songs
had come from a very pure place.

1502
01:30:40,270 --> 01:30:42,940
♪ A little bit young
And hassled... ♪

1503
01:30:43,023 --> 01:30:45,984
He was doing it all
on headphones.

1504
01:30:46,067 --> 01:30:47,903
I said, "Jeff,
you could get speakers

1505
01:30:47,986 --> 01:30:49,154
and it would fill the room."

1506
01:30:52,866 --> 01:30:56,578
♪ I disgust you ♪

1507
01:30:56,661 --> 01:31:01,666
♪ Feel the power
You cut the truth into you ♪

1508
01:31:01,750 --> 01:31:03,794
He got
where he needed to go.

1509
01:31:03,877 --> 01:31:06,129
♪ I could kiss you ♪

1510
01:31:06,212 --> 01:31:10,258
♪ With lines of escape
In my mouth ♪

1511
01:31:10,342 --> 01:31:12,803
He's like, "I want
to open up a bank account,

1512
01:31:12,886 --> 01:31:16,306
buy this house,
and I wanna buy a car."

1513
01:31:16,389 --> 01:31:20,644
He was really happy
and having so...

1514
01:31:22,395 --> 01:31:23,605
much fun.

1515
01:31:26,149 --> 01:31:30,820
♪ They say
Everything can be replaced ♪

1516
01:31:33,281 --> 01:31:38,495
♪ But every distance
Is not near... ♪

1517
01:31:38,578 --> 01:31:42,457
Jeff was supposedly on
the way to the rehearsal space.

1518
01:31:42,540 --> 01:31:45,293
He was
with the guitar tech, Foti.

1519
01:31:48,088 --> 01:31:51,174
They ended up going down
to Wolf River.

1520
01:31:52,926 --> 01:31:54,344
It was typical Jeff.

1521
01:31:54,427 --> 01:31:55,846
He thought,
"Oh, it's so beautiful.

1522
01:31:55,929 --> 01:31:57,639
I'm gonna go in fully clothed."

1523
01:31:59,099 --> 01:32:01,852
No one swims down there.
It was muddy.

1524
01:32:01,935 --> 01:32:04,354
I don't know about currents.
There were boats.

1525
01:32:04,437 --> 01:32:07,983
♪ From the west
Down to the east ♪

1526
01:32:08,066 --> 01:32:09,693
He was listening
to "Whole Lotta Love"

1527
01:32:09,776 --> 01:32:11,444
by Led Zeppelin.

1528
01:32:12,070 --> 01:32:14,614
♪ Any day now ♪

1529
01:32:14,698 --> 01:32:16,783
Love, anger, depression, joy...

1530
01:32:16,866 --> 01:32:18,869
♪ Any day now ♪

1531
01:32:18,952 --> 01:32:20,120
...and Zeppelin.

1532
01:32:20,203 --> 01:32:24,457
♪ I shall be released ♪

1533
01:32:27,168 --> 01:32:30,088
♪ Any day now ♪

1534
01:32:30,964 --> 01:32:34,050
♪ Any day now ♪

1535
01:32:34,968 --> 01:32:39,556
♪ I shall be released ♪

1536
01:32:39,639 --> 01:32:42,559
He probably went in the water

1537
01:32:42,642 --> 01:32:44,394
as soon as we hit the tarmac.

1538
01:32:48,273 --> 01:32:51,192
We got to the house,
and it was kind of in disarray.

1539
01:32:51,276 --> 01:32:53,737
♪ - I kept thinking

1540
01:32:53,820 --> 01:32:56,614
I was gonna hear the screen door
squeak open in the back

1541
01:32:56,698 --> 01:32:59,993
and slam, you know, and then
he'd come to the kitchen

1542
01:33:00,076 --> 01:33:02,537
and we'd be like, "Yo!"
And he'd be like, "What's up?"

1543
01:33:05,665 --> 01:33:07,709
Gene picks up the phone and...

1544
01:33:09,127 --> 01:33:11,046
just said, "Let's go."

1545
01:33:14,883 --> 01:33:16,885
I thought he just swam across.

1546
01:33:18,887 --> 01:33:22,099
It was very quiet
and peaceful down there.

1547
01:33:22,182 --> 01:33:25,393
The sun's setting.
You know, it's gonna be dusk.

1548
01:33:28,646 --> 01:33:30,774
Now there's, like, helicopters.

1549
01:33:40,366 --> 01:33:41,910
I picked up the phone
and said "Hello?"

1550
01:33:41,993 --> 01:33:42,994
And someone said,

1551
01:33:43,078 --> 01:33:45,288
"This is Memphis
Police Department."

1552
01:33:48,291 --> 01:33:49,511
And I said, "I'm coming."

1553
01:33:55,673 --> 01:33:57,509
The car pulled up in front...

1554
01:33:57,592 --> 01:34:02,514
...and it was
Sergeant Mary Grace Johnson

1555
01:34:02,597 --> 01:34:05,391
of the Homicide Department.

1556
01:34:05,475 --> 01:34:09,562
And she said, "You know,
we have to have the sunshine..."

1557
01:34:11,523 --> 01:34:13,274
'Cause that'll bring
the body up.

1558
01:34:16,277 --> 01:34:19,656
"If we wanna find him,
you have to stop the rain."

1559
01:34:51,855 --> 01:34:54,316
I was sitting
in his attic two or three days

1560
01:34:54,399 --> 01:34:55,859
after he went into the river.

1561
01:34:55,942 --> 01:34:58,069
And I just remember
breathing in,

1562
01:34:58,153 --> 01:35:02,866
and my breath, like,
just kept going in.

1563
01:35:02,949 --> 01:35:04,325
Like, I just... I had, like,

1564
01:35:04,409 --> 01:35:06,911
the biggest inhalation
that I've ever had.

1565
01:35:06,995 --> 01:35:09,706
And I just felt like
my lungs puffing up

1566
01:35:09,789 --> 01:35:11,041
with air and, like,

1567
01:35:11,124 --> 01:35:13,418
my spine straightening,
you know?

1568
01:35:14,085 --> 01:35:15,170
And., um...

1569
01:35:16,796 --> 01:35:18,381
something switched in me,

1570
01:35:18,464 --> 01:35:23,720
and I kind of felt like
he was... gone.

1571
01:35:35,607 --> 01:35:37,609
Singer-songwriter
Jeff Buckley's body

1572
01:35:37,692 --> 01:35:39,569
finally surfaced
late Wednesday afternoon

1573
01:35:39,652 --> 01:35:42,780
at the foot of Memphis's famed
musical corridor, Beale Street.

1574
01:35:42,864 --> 01:35:44,741
As a friend watched helplessly
from shore,

1575
01:35:44,824 --> 01:35:47,493
Buckley disappeared under
the wake of a passing boat.

1576
01:35:47,577 --> 01:35:49,621
The irony
wasn't lost on anyone

1577
01:35:49,704 --> 01:35:51,748
that a man who lived
for his music

1578
01:35:51,831 --> 01:35:54,125
would be found dead
at the foot of Beale Street,

1579
01:35:54,209 --> 01:35:56,085
where he'd performed before.

1580
01:36:00,924 --> 01:36:03,927
I was in Texas
visiting family.

1581
01:36:04,010 --> 01:36:08,306
I was staring at Brays Bayou,
watching the water.

1582
01:36:09,599 --> 01:36:11,684
That was the same time
when Jeff died.

1583
01:36:18,691 --> 01:36:20,526
It was more than I could bear.

1584
01:36:26,866 --> 01:36:30,620
♪ Well, I heard
There was a secret chord ♪

1585
01:36:30,703 --> 01:36:33,748
♪ That David played
And it pleased the Lord ♪

1586
01:36:33,831 --> 01:36:35,208
It was an undertow.

1587
01:36:35,291 --> 01:36:38,628
The Army Corps of Engineers
had actually

1588
01:36:38,711 --> 01:36:42,006
specifically dug
that viaduct area out

1589
01:36:42,090 --> 01:36:44,884
to keep it clear of debris,
so it dropped off.

1590
01:36:44,968 --> 01:36:48,554
And, obviously,
being fully clothed and weighted

1591
01:36:48,638 --> 01:36:50,473
and out there
for about 20 minutes,

1592
01:36:50,556 --> 01:36:54,519
plus an undertow,
his drowning made sense.

1593
01:36:54,602 --> 01:37:01,602
♪ Hallelujah
Hallelujah ♪

1594
01:37:01,734 --> 01:37:05,196
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1595
01:37:05,280 --> 01:37:10,451
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1596
01:37:10,535 --> 01:37:13,246
The autopsy report said
he had a beer in his system.

1597
01:37:13,329 --> 01:37:14,789
That's it.

1598
01:37:14,872 --> 01:37:18,042
I asked Rolling Stone
to please publish the report

1599
01:37:18,126 --> 01:37:20,712
to show that drugs
had nothing to do with it.

1600
01:37:20,795 --> 01:37:23,756
What's a shame is that the story
was very sensationalistic.

1601
01:37:23,840 --> 01:37:26,259
It was very much like,
"Well, we don't know."

1602
01:37:26,342 --> 01:37:29,721
And, unfortunately,
I can't tell you how many people

1603
01:37:29,804 --> 01:37:32,890
I've ran into
in the last 20-something years

1604
01:37:32,974 --> 01:37:34,476
who are like,
"Oh, yeah, he died of drugs,"

1605
01:37:34,559 --> 01:37:37,354
or, "Oh, he followed
in his father's footsteps."

1606
01:37:37,437 --> 01:37:42,942
♪ And from your lips
She drew the Hallelujah ♪

1607
01:37:43,526 --> 01:37:47,113
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1608
01:37:47,739 --> 01:37:50,491
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1609
01:37:51,242 --> 01:37:54,704
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1610
01:37:54,787 --> 01:38:00,752
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1611
01:38:03,254 --> 01:38:04,923
Jeff was one
of the greatest singers

1612
01:38:05,006 --> 01:38:06,549
of all time.

1613
01:38:06,632 --> 01:38:09,969
♪ Well, baby
I've been here before ♪

1614
01:38:10,053 --> 01:38:12,847
♪ I've seen this room
And I've walked this floor ♪

1615
01:38:12,930 --> 01:38:14,932
I didn't fully comprehend

1616
01:38:15,016 --> 01:38:17,518
how dope he was
when he was alive.

1617
01:38:19,270 --> 01:38:22,857
It was my first band
and he was my boy,

1618
01:38:22,940 --> 01:38:24,650
and everything
just felt natural.

1619
01:38:25,443 --> 01:38:26,527
It was...

1620
01:38:27,820 --> 01:38:32,116
a perfect example of, you know,
youth is wasted on the young.

1621
01:38:33,826 --> 01:38:36,954
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1622
01:38:37,538 --> 01:38:40,375
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1623
01:38:41,250 --> 01:38:44,546
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1624
01:38:44,629 --> 01:38:47,131
♪ Hallelujah... ♪

1625
01:38:47,215 --> 01:38:50,218
He had said, "You should
come out to Memphis.

1626
01:38:50,301 --> 01:38:51,886
It's beautiful here."

1627
01:38:51,969 --> 01:38:54,013
And I said,
"When your record's done,

1628
01:38:54,097 --> 01:38:56,182
I'd really love that."

1629
01:38:56,265 --> 01:38:59,894
♪ Well, there was a time
When you let me know ♪

1630
01:38:59,977 --> 01:39:02,980
♪ What's really going on below ♪

1631
01:39:03,064 --> 01:39:08,444
♪ But now you never show that
To me, do ya? ♪

1632
01:39:08,986 --> 01:39:10,238
We were so young.

1633
01:39:11,322 --> 01:39:13,032
Like...

1634
01:39:14,200 --> 01:39:16,160
we'd... you know,
all of those things

1635
01:39:16,244 --> 01:39:20,415
that felt so urgent and scary,
those fall away.

1636
01:39:22,625 --> 01:39:24,627
And...

1637
01:39:25,795 --> 01:39:29,132
you know,
I would have loved to see him...

1638
01:39:30,007 --> 01:39:31,843
have those things fall away.

1639
01:39:31,926 --> 01:39:34,262
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1640
01:39:34,345 --> 01:39:39,475
♪ Hallelujah ♪

1641
01:39:52,321 --> 01:39:55,366
Hey, Maruka. Hey, Mama.

1642
01:39:55,450 --> 01:39:57,368
This is your son.

1643
01:39:57,452 --> 01:39:59,745
There are some things
I have to tell you.

1644
01:40:02,123 --> 01:40:04,417
It's very special to me...

1645
01:40:04,500 --> 01:40:07,879
that you are a person
that a child came from.

1646
01:40:10,047 --> 01:40:14,302
And you are a person
that fought for their child.

1647
01:40:14,385 --> 01:40:16,471
You know,
you fought for the child.

1648
01:40:18,389 --> 01:40:20,308
You got some fuckin' cojones...

1649
01:40:20,391 --> 01:40:22,518
...baby.

1650
01:40:23,644 --> 01:40:25,813
Ma, you know...

1651
01:40:27,023 --> 01:40:28,858
anybody can be famous, Mary.

1652
01:40:29,901 --> 01:40:32,111
Anybody can be
fucking famous, baby.

1653
01:40:32,195 --> 01:40:36,574
But it takes a real spirit,
you hear me?

1654
01:40:36,657 --> 01:40:40,661
It takes a real spirit...
to raise a kid.

1655
01:40:42,788 --> 01:40:44,541
You know, you brought me
into the world.

1656
01:40:46,167 --> 01:40:48,836
A lot of my phrasing
is from you, you know?

1657
01:40:48,920 --> 01:40:51,756
A lot of my phrasing
when I sing is from you.

1658
01:40:53,758 --> 01:40:56,469
I'm glad you're my mother.

1659
01:40:56,552 --> 01:40:58,650
I'm glad you gave me the things
you gave me.

1660
01:41:01,682 --> 01:41:02,892
-Yeah.
-Yeah.

1661
01:41:02,975 --> 01:41:04,602
You know how much
I love you, Ma.

1662
01:41:04,685 --> 01:41:06,103
I love you too.

1663
01:41:06,187 --> 01:41:08,689
I love you.
I love you so much.

1664
01:41:09,857 --> 01:41:12,193
I love you.

1665
01:41:15,196 --> 01:41:16,822
Thank you, Ma.

1666
01:41:19,033 --> 01:41:23,955
♪ Well, maybe I'm just too
young ♪ -

1667
01:41:24,038 --> 01:41:25,998
♪ To keep good love ♪

1668
01:41:26,082 --> 01:41:33,005
♪ From going wrong ♪

1669
01:41:35,341 --> 01:41:37,093
♪ Oh! ♪

1670
01:41:38,219 --> 01:41:44,559
♪ Oh, oh, oh! ♪

1671
01:41:44,642 --> 01:41:50,607
♪ Yeah, whoa, oh, oh ♪

1672
01:41:50,690 --> 01:41:56,195
♪ Oh, lover
You should've come over ♪

1673
01:41:59,407 --> 01:42:04,453
♪ Well, I feel too young
To hold on ♪

1674
01:42:05,746 --> 01:42:10,752
♪ And I'm much too old
To break free and run ♪

1675
01:42:10,835 --> 01:42:16,882
♪ Too deaf, dumb, and blind
To see the damage I've done ♪

1676
01:42:16,966 --> 01:42:22,847
♪ Sweet lover
You should've come over ♪

1677
01:42:24,056 --> 01:42:27,435
♪ How long will I wait
For you? ♪

1678
01:42:27,518 --> 01:42:31,147
♪ Lover, lover, lover ♪

1679
01:42:31,230 --> 01:42:34,358
♪ Love, love, love ♪

1680
01:42:34,442 --> 01:42:37,903
♪ Lover, lover! ♪

1681
01:42:37,987 --> 01:42:44,493
♪ Lover! ♪

1682
01:42:45,703 --> 01:42:50,458
♪ You should've come over ♪

1683
01:42:51,792 --> 01:42:58,716
♪ 'Cause it's not too late ♪

1684
01:43:09,477 --> 01:43:11,103
Thanks a lot, everybody.

1685
01:43:11,187 --> 01:43:12,396
Goodnight.

1686
01:43:18,653 --> 01:43:20,154
You were beautiful.

1687
01:43:20,905 --> 01:43:22,615
Thanks a lot. And I love you.

1688
01:43:30,873 --> 01:43:34,544
♪ Lady, all the troubles
Are my fright ♪

1689
01:43:34,627 --> 01:43:37,630
♪ I disgust you ♪

1690
01:43:38,506 --> 01:43:41,050
♪ Feel the power ♪

1691
01:43:41,133 --> 01:43:46,263
♪ You cut the truth into you ♪

1692
01:43:46,347 --> 01:43:53,187
♪ Why do you think
I did not on this rely? ♪

1693
01:43:53,270 --> 01:43:55,565
♪ I could kiss you ♪

1694
01:43:55,648 --> 01:43:59,402
♪ With lines of escape
In my mouth ♪

1695
01:43:59,485 --> 01:44:03,322
♪ Ah-ha-ha ♪

1696
01:44:10,788 --> 01:44:13,249
♪ Please let me bring back ♪

1697
01:44:13,332 --> 01:44:17,336
♪ These gifts of mine
To the woman ♪

1698
01:44:18,212 --> 01:44:20,548
♪ Stars shined on my back ♪

1699
01:44:20,631 --> 01:44:25,595
♪ As I slept and knew you ♪

1700
01:44:25,678 --> 01:44:29,432
♪ You didn't leave it all ♪

1701
01:44:29,515 --> 01:44:33,061
♪ You made an even call ♪

1702
01:44:33,144 --> 01:44:36,773
♪ My belly released the stars ♪

1703
01:44:36,856 --> 01:44:43,070
♪ And tears between the scars ♪

1704
01:44:47,742 --> 01:44:48,826
♪ Ooh! ♪

1705
01:45:02,673 --> 01:45:06,927
♪ Below this we'll end here
Until the end of time ♪

1706
01:45:07,011 --> 01:45:11,056
♪ Beyond the moment
That ends our bondage ♪

1707
01:45:11,140 --> 01:45:14,351
♪ I am your failed
Husband contender ♪

1708
01:45:14,435 --> 01:45:17,730
♪ I'm your loan shark of bliss ♪

1709
01:45:17,813 --> 01:45:21,317
♪ This dream you've ridden on ♪

1710
01:45:21,400 --> 01:45:25,529
♪ Turns your world
To explosions ♪

1711
01:45:25,613 --> 01:45:29,325
♪ I need to be alone ♪

1712
01:45:29,408 --> 01:45:35,080
♪ To heal this bleeding stone ♪

1713
01:45:35,164 --> 01:45:40,294
♪ Now, smell
The rain of London ♪

1714
01:45:40,377 --> 01:45:44,215
♪ It still insists ♪

1715
01:45:44,298 --> 01:45:49,136
♪ That we beg for our ♪

1716
01:45:49,595 --> 01:45:53,224
♪ Purity ♪

1717
01:45:53,891 --> 01:46:00,523
♪ As if we are pure ♪

1718
01:46:00,606 --> 01:46:06,111
♪ In the reign
Of our contentment ♪

1719
01:46:06,195 --> 01:46:12,326
♪ As if I can think of ♪

1720
01:46:12,409 --> 01:46:15,788
♪ This ♪

1721
01:46:15,871 --> 01:46:19,667
♪ No more ♪