1 00:00:10,522 --> 00:00:12,003 OK, you can go. 2 00:00:14,563 --> 00:00:16,082 This is the last of it. 3 00:00:21,123 --> 00:00:22,458 Stop! 4 00:00:22,483 --> 00:00:24,419 We'll give you the money back! 5 00:00:24,443 --> 00:00:26,658 Please, we'll pay it back and more! 6 00:00:26,682 --> 00:00:29,722 More! Give us, uh, eight weeks. 7 00:00:38,362 --> 00:00:39,643 That's it. 8 00:00:40,682 --> 00:00:43,418 No. Count it all again. 9 00:00:43,442 --> 00:00:47,082 He's counted it three times already. That... is... it. 10 00:00:48,122 --> 00:00:50,738 We did it? We're done. 11 00:00:50,762 --> 00:00:52,618 Woo! 12 00:00:52,643 --> 00:00:56,523 ♪ This train is a clean train, you know this train 13 00:00:58,122 --> 00:01:00,658 ♪ This train is a clean train 14 00:01:00,682 --> 00:01:02,298 ♪ I said, this train... ♪ 15 00:01:02,323 --> 00:01:03,778 Oh, yes! 16 00:01:03,802 --> 00:01:06,418 ♪ This train is a clean train 17 00:01:06,442 --> 00:01:08,978 ♪ Everybody riding in Jesus' name 18 00:01:09,003 --> 00:01:12,442 ♪ Because this train is a cle-e-an train... ♪ 19 00:02:06,522 --> 00:02:07,563 Ma'am. 20 00:02:08,763 --> 00:02:12,098 Diane. How did you get into the police car park? 21 00:02:12,122 --> 00:02:14,259 Oh, I went up to the front desk, said I had information 22 00:02:14,282 --> 00:02:17,338 on the Somerset Stalker, desk sergeant went to get his notepad - 23 00:02:17,362 --> 00:02:19,242 bingo. Right. 24 00:02:20,522 --> 00:02:23,002 And can I help you with something? Yeah. 25 00:02:24,962 --> 00:02:26,643 Cluck-cluck-cluck. 26 00:02:27,923 --> 00:02:30,538 Excuse me? I found this little bad boy on a routine search 27 00:02:30,562 --> 00:02:33,699 of the community centre, carried out while I was on a date during which 28 00:02:33,723 --> 00:02:35,819 the guy said he was in love with me. 29 00:02:35,843 --> 00:02:37,418 After one date. 30 00:02:37,442 --> 00:02:39,819 You take evidence bags on dates? 31 00:02:39,843 --> 00:02:41,579 What, you don't? 32 00:02:41,603 --> 00:02:46,218 What do you imagine to be the significance of a plastic egg? 33 00:02:46,242 --> 00:02:50,139 Oh. Well, ma'am, these can be used to transport or conceal 34 00:02:50,163 --> 00:02:51,538 illegal drugs 35 00:02:51,562 --> 00:02:55,139 cos they can be inserted into various human orifices. 36 00:02:55,163 --> 00:02:58,938 Oh. You open the egg thusly, pop the drugs in, close the lid, 37 00:02:58,962 --> 00:03:00,859 then gently insert it 38 00:03:00,883 --> 00:03:03,923 into your anal or vaginal cavity. 39 00:03:06,203 --> 00:03:09,299 Like that, or there. 40 00:03:09,323 --> 00:03:12,362 Dealer's choice. Well, uh... Do you want to...? 41 00:03:14,483 --> 00:03:18,402 It's evidence. Thank you, Diane, I will see to this. Pleasure. 42 00:03:20,763 --> 00:03:22,483 Have a good day. 43 00:03:29,002 --> 00:03:30,522 Jesus Christ. 44 00:03:39,562 --> 00:03:42,259 Can I talk to you about something? 45 00:03:42,283 --> 00:03:44,778 Since they granted us the community centre, 46 00:03:44,802 --> 00:03:47,218 there are all these due diligence forms to fill in, 47 00:03:47,242 --> 00:03:49,978 and this one's about money laundering. 48 00:03:50,002 --> 00:03:53,459 Money laundering? Yes. Not-for-profits are a big target 49 00:03:53,483 --> 00:03:55,098 for money launderers, obviously, 50 00:03:55,122 --> 00:03:57,739 and we have to be whiter-than-white. 51 00:03:57,763 --> 00:03:59,498 That's not the phrase I'd use. 52 00:03:59,522 --> 00:04:03,139 So, I was checking our bank account and... 53 00:04:03,163 --> 00:04:04,739 What am I looking at, exactly? 54 00:04:04,763 --> 00:04:08,139 Here. Thousands of pounds going out 55 00:04:08,163 --> 00:04:11,362 to something called Laycock Logistical Services. 56 00:04:13,002 --> 00:04:16,218 Do you know what that is? Hmm. 57 00:04:16,242 --> 00:04:19,259 During my date with Gregory Dillard, I immediately noticed 58 00:04:19,283 --> 00:04:22,298 he shuffled into the pub with hunched shoulders and lowered head, 59 00:04:22,322 --> 00:04:24,459 as if he doesn't want to be seen by the world, 60 00:04:24,483 --> 00:04:27,019 like a paedo in a playground. I get that. 61 00:04:27,043 --> 00:04:29,899 What do you mean, you get that?! During our conversation, 62 00:04:29,923 --> 00:04:33,098 the subject told me he was so lonely he sometimes orders things 63 00:04:33,122 --> 00:04:36,283 from Amazon just so he can see humans over the weekend. 64 00:04:37,963 --> 00:04:39,858 Actually, here I've got written, 65 00:04:39,882 --> 00:04:42,259 "My vagina feels as dry as a camel's arse." 66 00:04:42,283 --> 00:04:45,579 This is good. Thank you so much, Diane. I mean, everything you are 67 00:04:45,603 --> 00:04:48,699 saying completely chimes with my own findings. Which are? 68 00:04:48,723 --> 00:04:51,899 Since his divorce, Greg has become so scared of rejection 69 00:04:51,923 --> 00:04:54,699 that to protect himself from it, he has made himself hideous. 70 00:04:54,723 --> 00:04:58,178 Mm. Yeah, I concur. I object. Overruled. Mm. 71 00:04:58,202 --> 00:05:02,978 Also I think all this repression is actually making Greg very dangerous. 72 00:05:03,002 --> 00:05:05,978 During our date on Friday, he kissed me 73 00:05:06,002 --> 00:05:08,418 without me giving him any sexual signals. 74 00:05:08,442 --> 00:05:11,218 You asked me to have intercourse with you! 75 00:05:11,242 --> 00:05:13,499 Yeah. As a test. 76 00:05:13,523 --> 00:05:16,139 Mm. What kind of test would that be?! 77 00:05:16,163 --> 00:05:18,379 He came at me with such terrifying lust, 78 00:05:18,403 --> 00:05:20,619 I was forced to pepper spray him. Seriously? 79 00:05:20,643 --> 00:05:22,298 Why do you think I came home in tears? 80 00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:24,923 I thought you were like that after every date. 81 00:05:33,562 --> 00:05:35,082 Look who's here. 82 00:05:37,403 --> 00:05:39,002 Hello, son. 83 00:05:41,122 --> 00:05:43,699 You look well. 84 00:05:43,723 --> 00:05:45,043 So do you. 85 00:05:48,122 --> 00:05:51,362 One month. She's clean. As a whistle. 86 00:05:53,362 --> 00:05:56,658 Good for you, Mum. Weird how it happened. 87 00:05:56,682 --> 00:05:59,019 I was buying gear from this kid and he handed me a leaflet 88 00:05:59,043 --> 00:06:01,538 for one of them drug support groups. 89 00:06:01,562 --> 00:06:04,738 Got to start listening when even your dealer's worried about you, eh? 90 00:06:04,762 --> 00:06:07,122 So, I want to move back in with Mum. No. 91 00:06:08,523 --> 00:06:10,322 Why not? She's better now. 92 00:06:12,043 --> 00:06:14,658 Look, I'm proper glad you're better and that, 93 00:06:14,682 --> 00:06:18,418 but we both know one month's just not a long time. 94 00:06:18,442 --> 00:06:20,459 One day at a time, son. 95 00:06:20,483 --> 00:06:22,002 I couldn't agree with you more. 96 00:06:23,322 --> 00:06:26,978 Esme, go and get ready for school, please. I got ages. 97 00:06:27,002 --> 00:06:29,963 Es. Please go and get ready for school. 98 00:06:41,002 --> 00:06:44,579 Do you know she's got a boyfriend now? Yeah, of course. 99 00:06:44,603 --> 00:06:47,603 Missy's all grown-up. Still my little girl, though. 100 00:06:51,963 --> 00:06:54,019 It's good to see you. 101 00:06:54,043 --> 00:06:56,603 Congratulations on the coin. I hope it all works out. 102 00:07:07,843 --> 00:07:09,322 Goodbye, Mum. 103 00:07:11,122 --> 00:07:14,338 He's not my legal guardian any more. So, I can move in with you 104 00:07:14,362 --> 00:07:16,483 if I want to. I can do what I want. 105 00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:19,843 Your brother only wants the best for you. 106 00:07:27,523 --> 00:07:29,362 You feel like a big man now? 107 00:07:43,202 --> 00:07:45,738 What in God's name are you doing, Frank? 108 00:07:45,762 --> 00:07:47,579 Ironing. 109 00:07:47,603 --> 00:07:51,178 Well, how'd you learn to do that? Tom showed me a video 110 00:07:51,202 --> 00:07:52,939 on the internet. 111 00:07:52,963 --> 00:07:55,459 I'm going to mow the lawn next. 112 00:07:55,483 --> 00:07:58,019 Who are you and what have you done with my father? 113 00:07:58,043 --> 00:08:00,699 I'll get it. 114 00:08:00,723 --> 00:08:03,843 It's sort of like making a pizza. Is it? 115 00:08:06,242 --> 00:08:09,178 How's your mom doing? Oh, she's much better. 116 00:08:09,202 --> 00:08:11,819 They think that she had an adverse reaction to some medication. 117 00:08:11,843 --> 00:08:14,002 She's back in the home now. That's good. 118 00:08:15,923 --> 00:08:18,418 We should visit again. 119 00:08:18,442 --> 00:08:20,459 I'd appreciate that, thank you. 120 00:08:20,483 --> 00:08:23,403 Grandpa, there's someone at the door for you. 121 00:08:30,043 --> 00:08:31,082 Hey. 122 00:08:33,082 --> 00:08:36,322 What's tickin', chicken? Don't call me chicken. 123 00:08:39,202 --> 00:08:43,938 There's this woman, Claire, she's my second-in-command at the BJC. 124 00:08:43,962 --> 00:08:47,698 Now that we've got our little situation under control, 125 00:08:47,722 --> 00:08:51,538 she's started snooping around in our finances. Why? 126 00:08:51,562 --> 00:08:53,979 She'll do anything to bring me down. 127 00:08:54,003 --> 00:08:57,178 That is, unless I can bring her down first. 128 00:08:57,202 --> 00:09:00,339 Is that something you could help with? 129 00:09:00,363 --> 00:09:04,019 Are you sure you want to start throwing innocent folks 130 00:09:04,043 --> 00:09:06,938 under the bus? Claire isn't innocent. 131 00:09:06,962 --> 00:09:09,139 She's trying to take control of my group. 132 00:09:09,163 --> 00:09:12,778 If I have to choose between Claire and the BJC, I choose the BJC. 133 00:09:12,802 --> 00:09:15,403 You sound like Stalin before the purges. 134 00:09:16,562 --> 00:09:21,538 Do you want to join me in jail if she carries on digging? 135 00:09:21,562 --> 00:09:23,019 You and your second-in-command, 136 00:09:23,043 --> 00:09:26,938 you both have BJC credit cards for expenses and whatnot? 137 00:09:26,962 --> 00:09:28,442 Yeah. 138 00:09:35,842 --> 00:09:39,722 Good. We'll run the old Windy City Railroad on her. 139 00:09:41,043 --> 00:09:43,298 I need you to... 140 00:09:43,322 --> 00:09:45,363 ..send her on a coffee run. 141 00:09:50,722 --> 00:09:54,178 OK. So, let's imagine this is a really hip cocktail bar and, 142 00:09:54,202 --> 00:09:56,202 Greg, let me see you walk in. 143 00:09:59,123 --> 00:10:02,418 You're right, he does walk like he's on the Sex Offenders Register. Yep. 144 00:10:02,442 --> 00:10:05,259 What? You know it's my sight that's bad, not my hearing? 145 00:10:05,283 --> 00:10:07,099 Let's try again. OK, turn around. 146 00:10:07,123 --> 00:10:09,058 Right, chin up. 147 00:10:09,082 --> 00:10:11,298 Shoulders back. Walk. 148 00:10:11,322 --> 00:10:13,058 You're too stiff, swing your arms. 149 00:10:13,082 --> 00:10:14,962 You look like a chimp. 150 00:10:16,003 --> 00:10:17,658 Put your thumbs in your belt. 151 00:10:17,682 --> 00:10:20,363 OK. Now, lead with your crotch. 152 00:10:21,842 --> 00:10:23,698 Yeah. Too much. Dial it back, dial it back. 153 00:10:23,722 --> 00:10:26,538 Add a bit of swagger, yeah, yeah, that's it. 154 00:10:26,562 --> 00:10:29,019 Easy there, cowboy. 155 00:10:29,043 --> 00:10:30,458 I mean, it's... 156 00:10:30,482 --> 00:10:32,938 ..it's... it's good enough? 157 00:10:32,962 --> 00:10:36,778 OK, imagine Diane, she's back in the pub, she's doing a crossword. 158 00:10:36,802 --> 00:10:40,938 Your date never happened, and then you walk over and chat her up. 159 00:10:40,962 --> 00:10:44,698 Yep. Come on. Lean, Greg, lean, let me see some lean. 160 00:10:44,722 --> 00:10:46,658 That's it, yes. 161 00:10:46,682 --> 00:10:48,859 Yes, that's it, Greg. 162 00:10:48,883 --> 00:10:50,482 And ask her out. 163 00:10:51,602 --> 00:10:55,163 How? Say something off the cuff and flirty. Oh. 164 00:10:56,322 --> 00:10:59,338 Apparently, eight across is "What's your number?" 165 00:10:59,363 --> 00:11:01,859 Oh, really? That's interesting. 166 00:11:01,883 --> 00:11:02,979 Yeah. 167 00:11:03,003 --> 00:11:05,538 Cos six down is "Fuck off, weirdo." 168 00:11:05,562 --> 00:11:07,339 Would that happen? 169 00:11:07,363 --> 00:11:10,058 It just happened, Greg. Roll with it. Hello? 170 00:11:10,082 --> 00:11:11,698 Hello, is that Lady Gabby? 171 00:11:11,722 --> 00:11:14,058 This is Claire from the Bristol Justice Collective. 172 00:11:14,082 --> 00:11:16,418 Oh, hi. How can I help? 173 00:11:16,442 --> 00:11:19,979 Have you heard of something called Laycock Logistical Services? 174 00:11:20,003 --> 00:11:22,899 Er, no. Should I have? 175 00:11:22,923 --> 00:11:26,178 Forgive me being so direct but can I ask why you chose to donate 176 00:11:26,202 --> 00:11:29,219 £100,000 to the BJC? I did what now?! 177 00:11:29,243 --> 00:11:32,099 Don't think we're ungrateful. Thanks to you, we didn't have to rely on 178 00:11:32,123 --> 00:11:34,778 a council grant, and we love our new office. I... 179 00:11:34,802 --> 00:11:36,979 I didn't donate £100,00. 180 00:11:37,003 --> 00:11:41,139 I realise you've asked to remain anonymous but I know it was you. 181 00:11:41,163 --> 00:11:44,019 Sorry, I-I... I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. 182 00:11:44,043 --> 00:11:46,899 My lawyer, Greg, handles the money matters. 183 00:11:46,923 --> 00:11:48,899 Why are you asking all of this? 184 00:11:48,923 --> 00:11:52,202 Because I think we could be the victims of money laundering. 185 00:11:56,643 --> 00:11:58,442 You still there? 186 00:11:59,643 --> 00:12:01,619 Let me look into it. 187 00:12:01,643 --> 00:12:04,043 That wasn't flirting, you just shot me in the face! 188 00:12:20,923 --> 00:12:24,298 So... how does it feel, 189 00:12:24,322 --> 00:12:28,979 letting John fly the coop? Well, it may not seem this way now but... 190 00:12:29,003 --> 00:12:32,899 ..what I did will eventually be viewed as a great kindness. 191 00:12:32,923 --> 00:12:35,739 What do you mean? He means, uh... 192 00:12:35,763 --> 00:12:38,962 He means letting me leave without a fight, don't you, Dad? 193 00:12:40,163 --> 00:12:42,099 Right. 194 00:12:42,123 --> 00:12:44,178 I always thought you'd pressed him into 195 00:12:44,202 --> 00:12:45,899 a kind of indentured servitude, 196 00:12:45,923 --> 00:12:48,938 so I was surprised when you let him have his freedom. 197 00:12:48,962 --> 00:12:52,298 Girls, did I hear something about a trifle? 198 00:12:52,322 --> 00:12:56,403 Yes. Come and help me put the sprinkles on the trifle. 199 00:12:57,602 --> 00:12:59,938 This is Daddy's favourite, isn't it? 200 00:12:59,962 --> 00:13:02,458 So, um, you didn't tell her 201 00:13:02,482 --> 00:13:04,322 how it went down, did you? 202 00:13:06,082 --> 00:13:09,979 Look, if you want to dress things up for the sake of your marriage, 203 00:13:10,003 --> 00:13:12,082 I understand. What are you doing here, Dad? 204 00:13:13,562 --> 00:13:16,499 I'm at lunch, what does it look like? 205 00:13:16,523 --> 00:13:18,938 Yeah. Just thought you'd pop in for lunch? 206 00:13:18,962 --> 00:13:21,139 Yeah, like I always do. 207 00:13:21,163 --> 00:13:23,123 See you and Ruth and the grandkids. 208 00:13:25,403 --> 00:13:27,043 You fired me. 209 00:13:28,643 --> 00:13:32,259 Like I said, it was nothing personal, only business. 210 00:13:32,283 --> 00:13:35,298 Ah, business. You are ruining me, do you know that? 211 00:13:35,322 --> 00:13:39,698 You have to be able to compartmentalise things, boy. 212 00:13:39,722 --> 00:13:41,899 Work and family are two different things. 213 00:13:41,923 --> 00:13:45,403 We're family, always will be. 214 00:13:47,043 --> 00:13:48,499 Here we are. 215 00:13:48,523 --> 00:13:52,139 Oh, my goodness. That is delicious. 216 00:13:52,163 --> 00:13:56,499 Son? Is that not delicious, son? 217 00:13:56,523 --> 00:13:58,938 It's whatever you say it is, Dad. 218 00:13:58,962 --> 00:14:01,722 I'll get some bowls. Yeah. 219 00:14:04,962 --> 00:14:07,739 Can I get six flat whites with oat milk, 220 00:14:07,763 --> 00:14:12,082 two mint teas and a masala chai for me? No worries, coming up. 221 00:14:16,802 --> 00:14:21,938 You're one thirsty lady. I drew the short straw for the coffee run. 222 00:14:21,962 --> 00:14:24,123 Oh! 223 00:14:26,923 --> 00:14:30,139 Uh... Oof... 224 00:14:30,163 --> 00:14:33,698 Are you OK? I'll be OK, I'm fine. 225 00:14:33,722 --> 00:14:35,043 Thank you. 226 00:14:37,363 --> 00:14:40,562 Low blood sugar. Thank you. 227 00:14:47,082 --> 00:14:49,698 I said to the bloke, "What is your problem?" 228 00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:52,499 "Nadger did a shit out of the window." 229 00:14:52,523 --> 00:14:55,578 Anyway, long story short, my Uber rating is down to a 4.3, so... 230 00:14:55,602 --> 00:14:58,139 Oh, hold on, chap, posh trim alert. Your Ladyship! 231 00:14:58,163 --> 00:15:00,739 How lovely to see you. I'm afraid Greg's not here at the moment. 232 00:15:00,763 --> 00:15:03,859 I know. It's you I wanted to see. Fuck off, chap. 233 00:15:03,883 --> 00:15:06,538 How can I help, Your Ladyship? I'd like to see my client account. 234 00:15:06,562 --> 00:15:09,499 Nay problemo. 235 00:15:09,523 --> 00:15:12,899 Um, I know you say you're a lesbian, 236 00:15:12,923 --> 00:15:16,139 and I am totally on board with that, 237 00:15:16,163 --> 00:15:21,019 but would you ever consider trying it with a bloke? 238 00:15:21,043 --> 00:15:22,259 Oh, here we go. 239 00:15:22,283 --> 00:15:25,099 Can you see if I've made any large donations 240 00:15:25,123 --> 00:15:26,938 to something called the BJC? 241 00:15:26,962 --> 00:15:31,338 Uh... yes, a very sizeable amount several months ago. 242 00:15:31,363 --> 00:15:33,818 And Laycock Logistical Services? 243 00:15:33,842 --> 00:15:35,859 Again, a number of large amounts. 244 00:15:35,883 --> 00:15:39,538 In fact, you have one such payment going out today. 245 00:15:39,562 --> 00:15:42,019 Freeze all payments this instant. 246 00:15:42,043 --> 00:15:44,739 What? Just do it. 247 00:15:44,763 --> 00:15:47,019 Who authorised these payments? 248 00:15:47,043 --> 00:15:49,578 Er, Greg. Why? 249 00:15:49,602 --> 00:15:51,538 What's going on? 250 00:15:51,562 --> 00:15:54,499 I need a drink. Want to go and grab a drink? 251 00:15:54,523 --> 00:15:57,219 Does a rocking horse have a wooden cock? 252 00:15:57,243 --> 00:16:00,123 Yeah, I would absolutely... Sorry! 253 00:16:01,763 --> 00:16:04,099 Apres-vous. 254 00:16:04,123 --> 00:16:07,778 How much is that ting, though? Expensive. Expensive. 255 00:16:07,802 --> 00:16:10,178 Oh, shit, you lot, stay there. 256 00:16:10,202 --> 00:16:13,818 Yo. One sec, one sec, one sec. 257 00:16:13,842 --> 00:16:15,163 See you later. 258 00:16:33,003 --> 00:16:34,643 There you go. Thanks. 259 00:16:39,523 --> 00:16:42,043 Right, get some rest. I'll take over. 260 00:16:52,923 --> 00:16:57,178 Margie, you ever start thinking about a big old lobster dinner? 261 00:16:57,202 --> 00:17:00,979 Mm, no, I've never had lobster. You never had lobster? Why? 262 00:17:01,003 --> 00:17:03,979 Well, I'm a single mum, not Camilla Parker Bowles. 263 00:17:04,002 --> 00:17:08,019 Well, tonight I'm taking you to dinner. 264 00:17:08,042 --> 00:17:10,739 A little fish restaurant I've had my eye on. 265 00:17:10,762 --> 00:17:13,378 It's Wednesday, we can't go to a restaurant, I've got a wash on. 266 00:17:13,403 --> 00:17:15,818 Table for four, seven o'clock, it's already booked. 267 00:17:15,843 --> 00:17:20,378 Young Tom, throw on a necktie. It's a high-class joint. 268 00:17:20,403 --> 00:17:22,818 Dad, is this some sort of Last Supper thing? 269 00:17:22,843 --> 00:17:25,098 Have you got test results you need to tell me? 270 00:17:25,123 --> 00:17:26,618 I'm fit as a fiddle. 271 00:17:26,643 --> 00:17:29,659 I just want to treat my family to the finer things. 272 00:17:29,682 --> 00:17:32,259 Make up for lost time. 273 00:17:32,282 --> 00:17:35,219 I totally want to try lobster. Yeah. 274 00:17:35,242 --> 00:17:40,378 I totally want to eat a lobster. Of course you do. Come on. 275 00:17:40,403 --> 00:17:43,138 Margie, put your best dress on. 276 00:17:43,163 --> 00:17:46,058 Let your old man treat ya. 277 00:17:46,083 --> 00:17:50,442 Lobster. Lemon. Mwah! 278 00:17:53,323 --> 00:17:54,778 Here we go! 279 00:17:54,802 --> 00:17:58,898 So, Yamani wants to leave her husband. Really? Yeah. 280 00:17:58,923 --> 00:18:01,979 Last weekend, Book Group, she told us that she would leave Raj 281 00:18:02,002 --> 00:18:04,659 for Benedict Cumberbatch at the drop of a hat. Her words. 282 00:18:04,682 --> 00:18:07,378 That doesn't mean she's going to leave her husband. That's like me 283 00:18:07,403 --> 00:18:09,979 saying I'd leave Ben for Michael B Jordan, 284 00:18:10,002 --> 00:18:12,843 or Dad saying he'd leave you for... Dame Helen Mirren. 285 00:18:14,123 --> 00:18:17,019 Celebrity crushes don't mean anything. 286 00:18:17,042 --> 00:18:19,979 I also fancy Dame Helen Mirren. 287 00:18:20,002 --> 00:18:24,083 Oh, no, Ben's leaving me for a national treasure! 288 00:18:27,482 --> 00:18:29,403 You're all idiots. 289 00:18:31,403 --> 00:18:33,699 Have you done a business plan? What? 290 00:18:33,722 --> 00:18:36,403 For your food stall in Weston. 291 00:18:38,083 --> 00:18:41,058 Rani's sorting that. Yeah, it's all in my head, 292 00:18:41,083 --> 00:18:43,138 I just need to get it down on paper. 293 00:18:43,163 --> 00:18:47,019 Well, I could help you with that. 294 00:18:47,042 --> 00:18:49,219 Your mother and I have been talking. 295 00:18:49,242 --> 00:18:53,019 We have some money put aside for when Rani went to university 296 00:18:53,042 --> 00:18:56,058 but, uh, as it's not happening... 297 00:18:56,083 --> 00:19:00,058 We would like to help both of you with the food stall. 298 00:19:00,083 --> 00:19:01,923 Really? Mm-hm. Mm-hm. 299 00:19:04,682 --> 00:19:08,578 Thank you! Thank you so much! 300 00:19:08,603 --> 00:19:10,979 Thank you. Thank you. 301 00:19:11,002 --> 00:19:14,778 Pleasure. Pleasure, pleasure. 302 00:19:14,803 --> 00:19:16,098 Hello? 303 00:19:16,123 --> 00:19:19,163 Time's up. Where's my money. 304 00:19:22,603 --> 00:19:24,858 We transferred the last of the money to you. 305 00:19:24,883 --> 00:19:27,618 No, no, you're 10,000 short. What? 306 00:19:27,643 --> 00:19:30,378 Deadline's today and I told you if you missed it, 307 00:19:30,403 --> 00:19:32,298 I start hurting people you love. 308 00:19:32,323 --> 00:19:35,538 You want cream or custard on your rhubarb crumble? 309 00:19:35,563 --> 00:19:37,818 I'll have custard, Mum. 310 00:19:37,843 --> 00:19:40,739 You having dinner with your mum and dad? 311 00:19:40,762 --> 00:19:45,538 Yeah. Mm-hm. That's lovely. My mum and dad have passed on. 312 00:19:45,563 --> 00:19:48,138 It's really important to treasure time with your mum and dad 313 00:19:48,163 --> 00:19:50,979 cos they'll be gone one day. Like tomorrow, 314 00:19:51,002 --> 00:19:53,499 if I don't get the rest of my fucking money. 315 00:19:53,522 --> 00:19:56,298 Your dad and Ben are having both cream and custard. 316 00:19:56,323 --> 00:19:59,338 Mum. I'm on the phone. It's a simple yes or no. 317 00:19:59,363 --> 00:20:01,499 Yes. I'll have both. Oh, fine. 318 00:20:01,522 --> 00:20:03,259 I don't understand what's happened. 319 00:20:03,282 --> 00:20:05,739 Maybe there was some sort of problem with the shell company. 320 00:20:05,762 --> 00:20:07,898 Not my concern. A deadline's a deadline. 321 00:20:07,923 --> 00:20:11,058 I'm going to need more time to figure out what happened. 322 00:20:11,083 --> 00:20:14,259 I warned you. No extensions, no negotiations. 323 00:20:14,282 --> 00:20:19,042 You have till tomorrow morning or you and I will both be orphans. 324 00:20:21,242 --> 00:20:27,739 ♪ Happy Birthday to you... ♪ 325 00:20:27,762 --> 00:20:30,323 Your crumble's getting cold. 326 00:20:32,962 --> 00:20:35,019 What's wrong? 327 00:20:35,042 --> 00:20:37,618 How is this happening? How is this happ...? 328 00:20:37,643 --> 00:20:39,419 Why didn't you transfer the money? 329 00:20:39,442 --> 00:20:42,979 I did but Gabby stopped it and froze her account. Unfreeze it. 330 00:20:43,002 --> 00:20:46,298 Only she can do that. Then find her, you lanky bastard! 331 00:20:46,323 --> 00:20:49,042 I dunno where she is and she's not answering her phone! 332 00:20:50,682 --> 00:20:52,979 We were done. We were done! 333 00:20:53,002 --> 00:20:55,979 Right. We're just going to have to ask for a bit more time. 334 00:20:56,002 --> 00:20:58,979 This isn't asking a teacher for an extension for an essay! 335 00:20:59,002 --> 00:21:02,259 He said he'd kill my parents! OK. Right. 336 00:21:02,282 --> 00:21:07,019 How do we make £10,000 by tomorrow? 337 00:21:07,042 --> 00:21:09,179 We could... hold up a bank? 338 00:21:09,202 --> 00:21:12,419 We're not holding up a bank. We could hold up... a petrol station. 339 00:21:12,442 --> 00:21:17,058 We're not holding up anything. We could kidnap somebody rich. 340 00:21:17,083 --> 00:21:19,179 Gabby's dad's loaded. We could kidnap Gabby 341 00:21:19,202 --> 00:21:21,898 and then threaten to cut off her fingers every hour. 342 00:21:21,923 --> 00:21:24,818 OK, let's calm down, all right? We're not in the Yakuza. 343 00:21:24,843 --> 00:21:28,019 And we'd run out of fingers before her father paid a penny. Oh! 344 00:21:28,042 --> 00:21:30,699 Tony Robinson from Blackadder lives locally. Is he rich? 345 00:21:30,722 --> 00:21:33,499 He's a white male actor. We're not kidnapping Baldrick! 346 00:21:33,522 --> 00:21:36,219 We're not kidnapping anyone! Do you have a better idea?! 347 00:21:36,242 --> 00:21:38,699 Pressure selling. What's pressure selling? 348 00:21:38,722 --> 00:21:40,778 Huh? Pressure selling? Yeah, what about it? 349 00:21:40,802 --> 00:21:43,098 You just brought it up. No, I didn't. Yes, you did. 350 00:21:43,123 --> 00:21:48,538 You just mentioned pressure selling as a way to make fast sales? Yes. 351 00:21:48,563 --> 00:21:50,778 We need to approach our client list with a time limit. 352 00:21:50,802 --> 00:21:54,019 That's what we need to do. Bulk offers, OK? And persistence closing. 353 00:21:54,042 --> 00:21:55,338 That's what we need to do. 354 00:21:55,363 --> 00:21:57,739 We don't let them go anywhere until they have bought fast 355 00:21:57,762 --> 00:22:00,298 and they have bought in bulk. I mean, it's a form of bullying... 356 00:22:00,323 --> 00:22:01,939 You'd know something about bullying, 357 00:22:01,962 --> 00:22:04,538 calling me a lanky bastard. Look in the mirror once in a while. 358 00:22:04,563 --> 00:22:06,898 Who's a lanky bastard? 359 00:22:06,923 --> 00:22:10,603 You just said I was a lanky bastard. What did you say? 360 00:22:16,442 --> 00:22:19,138 I will never be able to go back to tuna in a can. 361 00:22:19,163 --> 00:22:22,179 You want another lobster, I can tell. 362 00:22:22,202 --> 00:22:24,538 Do people have two in a row? 363 00:22:24,563 --> 00:22:27,138 One time in Maine, I ate five. 364 00:22:27,163 --> 00:22:30,019 For a bet, which I lost. 365 00:22:30,042 --> 00:22:32,499 How many did the other guy have? I'm not sure, 366 00:22:32,522 --> 00:22:34,843 I was wheeled out with butter poisoning. 367 00:22:37,603 --> 00:22:41,042 I might get a coffee. 368 00:22:43,603 --> 00:22:47,699 Oh! Masala chai. You have to try a cup. 369 00:22:47,722 --> 00:22:50,778 Nothing washes down shellfish better. 370 00:22:50,802 --> 00:22:54,083 OK, can we get two masala chais, please? 371 00:23:00,803 --> 00:23:04,298 What's up? It's Lady G, live from Bar Revelation, 372 00:23:04,323 --> 00:23:09,883 which is appropriate as I'm thinking about telling you... a secret. 373 00:23:30,202 --> 00:23:33,298 Yes, yes, but we are about to close up shop soon and I would hate 374 00:23:33,323 --> 00:23:34,778 for you to get to the weekend, 375 00:23:34,802 --> 00:23:37,419 not get your hands on a nice, strong macchiato. 376 00:23:37,442 --> 00:23:40,019 What if you find yourself real thirsty after we close? 377 00:23:40,042 --> 00:23:43,338 Yeah, fine, then - hang up. Still there, are we? 378 00:23:43,363 --> 00:23:45,298 Cos you know a great offer when you hear one, 379 00:23:45,323 --> 00:23:47,818 but this offer must end midnight. Look, if I were you, 380 00:23:47,843 --> 00:23:51,459 I would stock up for the holidays. Christmas. Easter. Half term. 381 00:23:51,482 --> 00:23:56,259 Take your pick. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. What? 382 00:23:56,282 --> 00:24:01,858 ..you might think that he was, you know, a nice sweet nerd. 383 00:24:01,883 --> 00:24:06,298 But he isn't. No. And this is a story of discovery 384 00:24:06,323 --> 00:24:10,098 but also of betrayal, and I'm not sure if I should tell it 385 00:24:10,123 --> 00:24:13,538 because if I do then, well, he won't have a flatmate any more, 386 00:24:13,563 --> 00:24:17,403 he will have a cellmate. Oh. Yeah. Shots fired. 387 00:24:18,883 --> 00:24:21,058 Is that live? Very. 388 00:24:21,083 --> 00:24:23,618 Does she know about the money laundering? Dunno. 389 00:24:23,643 --> 00:24:25,818 I bet Claire's told her something. 390 00:24:25,843 --> 00:24:28,939 She is trying to take the BJC away from me. 391 00:24:28,962 --> 00:24:32,419 She's not even from Bristol. She's bloody Scottish! 392 00:24:32,442 --> 00:24:34,338 Bloody foreigners. Coming over here, 393 00:24:34,363 --> 00:24:37,378 stealing our black civil rights groups, eh? Focus! 394 00:24:37,403 --> 00:24:41,058 You better find Gabby and stop her talking. 395 00:24:41,083 --> 00:24:42,363 Go! 396 00:25:04,883 --> 00:25:07,282 Business is booming all of a sudden. 397 00:25:14,242 --> 00:25:16,002 Oh, is any of that going spare? 398 00:25:21,282 --> 00:25:25,019 I'm back, unleashed. You know what? 399 00:25:25,042 --> 00:25:27,179 You shouldn't trust anyone. Don't... Don't... 400 00:25:27,202 --> 00:25:29,739 Don't trust your... your family, don't trust your friends, 401 00:25:29,762 --> 00:25:32,538 don't trust lawyers called Greg Dillard. 402 00:25:32,563 --> 00:25:34,939 Yeah, and do you know what? He's a fucking creep, actually. 403 00:25:34,962 --> 00:25:37,699 I went on his internet search history once, just for fun, and he 404 00:25:37,722 --> 00:25:40,659 searched "Viagra, how much is too much?" People need to know that 405 00:25:40,682 --> 00:25:46,219 they can't break my heart any more, don't they? I mean, really? 406 00:25:46,242 --> 00:25:50,219 Let me know in the comments if you think I should tell my story. 407 00:25:50,242 --> 00:25:52,858 Did she say Greg Dillard? Mm-hm. What is that? 408 00:25:52,883 --> 00:25:55,659 Remember Lady Gabby? Her live feed just popped up. 409 00:25:55,682 --> 00:25:57,058 She's on a massive bender, 410 00:25:57,083 --> 00:26:00,979 blabbering on about a criminal conspiracy. What a hot mess. 411 00:26:01,002 --> 00:26:04,338 Bring her in. Huh? Remember that kid who was in for armed robbery, 412 00:26:04,363 --> 00:26:06,098 we thought he had drug ties? Yeah. 413 00:26:06,123 --> 00:26:08,898 Well, the lawyer who magically showed up to take his case... 414 00:26:08,923 --> 00:26:09,979 Was Greg Dillard. 415 00:26:10,002 --> 00:26:12,979 The same lawyer we saw in court defending Christian Taylor. 416 00:26:13,002 --> 00:26:16,762 The same lawyer who's doing CS at Bennysfield. Go. 417 00:26:30,442 --> 00:26:34,858 OK, I'm putting you down for three flat whites and an expresso martini. 418 00:26:34,883 --> 00:26:38,659 I will offer you this at a reduced price if you buy in bulk. 419 00:26:38,682 --> 00:26:40,578 Well, then throw a party. 420 00:26:40,603 --> 00:26:44,499 You'll be Mr Popular. All right, cool. 421 00:26:44,522 --> 00:26:47,459 What are you going to say to Grandad? 422 00:26:47,482 --> 00:26:50,459 Thank you for my lobster. Thank you for my lobster. 423 00:26:50,482 --> 00:26:56,219 Yeah, thank you, Dad, for a lovely evening. Oh, sure. And this is? 424 00:26:56,242 --> 00:27:02,259 Masala chai. Cardamom. Cinnamon. 425 00:27:02,282 --> 00:27:04,843 Cloves. Delicious. 426 00:27:07,883 --> 00:27:09,002 Mm! 427 00:27:16,242 --> 00:27:17,603 Smell that. 428 00:27:20,123 --> 00:27:22,803 I'd like to pay with this, please. Of course. 429 00:27:50,442 --> 00:27:54,019 Where are you going? Inside? My friends are all expecting me. 430 00:27:54,042 --> 00:27:57,298 Nah, you're not coming in here. Why not? Cos the people we want in here 431 00:27:57,323 --> 00:28:00,939 look like they're going to provide glamour, not IT support. 432 00:28:00,962 --> 00:28:03,898 Step aside, mate. All right? 433 00:28:03,923 --> 00:28:05,858 Gabby! Mate, step away from the glass 434 00:28:05,883 --> 00:28:08,459 before I put your head through it. Seriously. Just let me in. No. 435 00:28:08,482 --> 00:28:10,722 Now, move. Come on. All right, I'm going. 436 00:28:12,083 --> 00:28:14,282 I could laugh at you if I want. 437 00:28:44,242 --> 00:28:46,123 Gabby! Ga... 438 00:29:13,042 --> 00:29:16,699 Cool. I'll send someone to you now. Ah, but this is a one-time deal. 439 00:29:16,722 --> 00:29:18,979 Yeah. Only for our most valued customers. 440 00:29:19,002 --> 00:29:23,298 You absolutely are, madam, yes, both you and your grandson. 441 00:29:23,323 --> 00:29:25,419 All right, so shall we say your usual? 442 00:29:25,442 --> 00:29:29,163 Oh, yeah. We've got our own dedicated delivery team. 443 00:30:01,563 --> 00:30:03,883 Karmacoma, Jamaica and Roma. 444 00:30:23,323 --> 00:30:26,898 Hiya. What? Can I come in, please? 445 00:30:26,923 --> 00:30:29,138 Password? 446 00:30:29,163 --> 00:30:31,123 Is it my mother's maiden name? 447 00:31:32,762 --> 00:31:34,323 Jesus! Woo! 448 00:31:37,762 --> 00:31:40,939 Don't mind me, I'm just... passing through. 449 00:31:40,962 --> 00:31:43,338 Greg? Yeah? 450 00:31:43,363 --> 00:31:44,858 It's Rosie. 451 00:31:44,883 --> 00:31:48,578 I was giving you a blowie when you reversed into that police car. 452 00:31:48,603 --> 00:31:51,179 Oh, right, yeah. How's it going? 453 00:31:51,202 --> 00:31:54,338 Yeah, yeah, mustn't grumble. Keeping busy. 454 00:31:54,363 --> 00:31:56,778 What happened that night with you, after? 455 00:31:56,802 --> 00:32:00,058 Cos I just got off with a warning. Did you? Yeah. Yeah, I got, um, 456 00:32:00,083 --> 00:32:03,459 120 hours of community service. Oh, no. Yeah. 457 00:32:03,482 --> 00:32:06,898 How did it go? Not great, if I'm honest. 458 00:32:06,923 --> 00:32:08,858 I ended up getting blackmailed 459 00:32:08,883 --> 00:32:11,459 and now I'm in hock to a ruthless London drug dealer. 460 00:32:11,482 --> 00:32:13,778 I'm sorry to hear that. Yeah. 461 00:32:13,803 --> 00:32:16,858 Oi! I'm sorry to break up this little reunion 462 00:32:16,883 --> 00:32:19,699 but I'm paying by the hour here, mate. Oh! 463 00:32:19,722 --> 00:32:22,818 Shut up, you little bitch! Yes, mistress. Eh, listen. 464 00:32:22,843 --> 00:32:25,338 I'm done here in 20 minutes if you want anything doing. 465 00:32:25,363 --> 00:32:28,338 We could finish that blowie that you never got. 466 00:32:28,363 --> 00:32:30,659 That's very good of you, but no, I can't, actually, 467 00:32:30,682 --> 00:32:33,459 cos I've got to quickly try and find one of my other clients before she, 468 00:32:33,482 --> 00:32:36,858 um, sends me to jail. Oh. You have been a bad boy. 469 00:32:36,883 --> 00:32:40,138 Anyway, lovely to see you. It's been good to see you. 470 00:32:40,163 --> 00:32:43,002 Thank you so much. Sorry for interrupting you. 471 00:32:44,083 --> 00:32:48,682 Woo! You've been a bad boy! Oh, yes, you have! 472 00:32:57,083 --> 00:32:58,242 Ooh! 473 00:33:00,123 --> 00:33:01,363 Evening. 474 00:33:05,803 --> 00:33:08,298 I don't suppose you've got a member of the landed gentry 475 00:33:08,323 --> 00:33:09,643 in here, have you? 476 00:33:14,403 --> 00:33:16,363 There's so many whips. 477 00:33:43,323 --> 00:33:44,802 Gabby! 478 00:33:46,323 --> 00:33:47,482 Gabby? 479 00:33:58,482 --> 00:33:59,682 Gabby? 480 00:34:07,682 --> 00:34:08,762 Gabby. 481 00:34:10,083 --> 00:34:13,018 Judas! Can we speak in private, please? 482 00:34:13,043 --> 00:34:14,579 Anything you have to say, 483 00:34:14,603 --> 00:34:17,978 you can say in front of my real friends here. 484 00:34:18,003 --> 00:34:19,498 There's a policeman here. 485 00:34:19,523 --> 00:34:22,338 Good. I have things to say to him. 486 00:34:22,362 --> 00:34:24,978 Just let me explain first. It's too late for explaining. 487 00:34:25,003 --> 00:34:28,378 Just hear me out. And if you still want to turn me in, 488 00:34:28,402 --> 00:34:29,922 I won't stop you. 489 00:34:32,362 --> 00:34:33,603 Please. 490 00:34:41,322 --> 00:34:43,659 Police. 491 00:34:43,682 --> 00:34:47,259 Has anyone seen Lady Gabriella Penrose-Howe? 492 00:34:47,282 --> 00:34:50,059 Right, then, you cheeky little monkeys. Guess who's brought 493 00:34:50,083 --> 00:34:52,898 the goods. We have got Chang and a lovely bit of MD... Mmm... 494 00:34:52,922 --> 00:34:56,018 ..mazing that you are here, Detective, 495 00:34:56,043 --> 00:34:59,818 because these are drugs. 496 00:34:59,842 --> 00:35:02,018 Yuck. 497 00:35:02,043 --> 00:35:04,603 Did you find my watch, by the way? 498 00:35:13,963 --> 00:35:17,579 We should get a move on, I think. I want an explanation, right now. 499 00:35:17,603 --> 00:35:18,898 Shall we do that at home over 500 00:35:18,922 --> 00:35:21,778 a cup of tea and a Mr Kipling? No, explain. What have you been doing? 501 00:35:21,802 --> 00:35:25,282 It's... It's so complicated, Gabby. Well, then un-complicate it, Greg. 502 00:35:27,043 --> 00:35:28,579 I've been using your client account 503 00:35:28,603 --> 00:35:30,922 to launder the proceeds of an illegal drug operation. 504 00:35:33,762 --> 00:35:36,619 Right. That's it, is it? Yeah. 505 00:35:36,643 --> 00:35:38,498 Cool. Great. 506 00:35:38,523 --> 00:35:42,898 Great. Shall we go? No, not great, Greg! Not cool! 507 00:35:42,922 --> 00:35:44,963 You've been using me to launder...?! 508 00:35:47,202 --> 00:35:51,498 So when you... when you said that everyone else in my life was a mooch 509 00:35:51,523 --> 00:35:54,938 and a hanger-on and I thought that that meant you really cared about 510 00:35:54,963 --> 00:35:57,018 me, that was bollocks? 511 00:35:57,043 --> 00:35:59,378 No, I do care about you. Of course. 512 00:35:59,402 --> 00:36:01,259 How can you say that?! 513 00:36:01,282 --> 00:36:05,483 Literally no-one in my life has used me more than you! 514 00:36:07,443 --> 00:36:09,202 I know. I'm sorry. 515 00:36:10,563 --> 00:36:12,362 You're my consigliere. 516 00:36:15,362 --> 00:36:18,898 I know you hired me to protect you and look after you 517 00:36:18,922 --> 00:36:20,882 and, uh, I betrayed you. 518 00:36:22,322 --> 00:36:25,418 But you have to know, I would never deliberately hurt you. 519 00:36:25,443 --> 00:36:27,739 You know, money laundering and exploiting you, 520 00:36:27,762 --> 00:36:29,818 that's not something I would choose to do. 521 00:36:29,842 --> 00:36:32,963 It's not just that you're my lawyer, Greg. 522 00:36:35,523 --> 00:36:38,259 I thought you were my friend. 523 00:36:38,282 --> 00:36:39,643 I am your friend. 524 00:36:43,523 --> 00:36:46,059 I know. I'm so sorry, Gabby. 525 00:36:46,083 --> 00:36:48,938 I don't even know how I ended up doing this. 526 00:36:48,963 --> 00:36:51,219 All I know is that there's guns, and threats, 527 00:36:51,242 --> 00:36:54,083 and everyone's lives are in danger if I don't do this. 528 00:36:56,202 --> 00:36:59,978 Whose lives? Who else is involved? 529 00:37:00,003 --> 00:37:03,083 Rani, Ben, Myrna, John, Frank. 530 00:37:05,202 --> 00:37:08,418 I'm the only one who doesn't know about this? 531 00:37:08,443 --> 00:37:09,483 Yeah. 532 00:38:26,563 --> 00:38:29,219 Yup, all here. 533 00:38:29,242 --> 00:38:31,563 Go on, kids, be on your way. 534 00:38:33,722 --> 00:38:35,818 Police are watching the building. 535 00:38:35,842 --> 00:38:37,219 What we going to do? 536 00:38:37,242 --> 00:38:39,202 Fuck. We're all fucked. 537 00:39:05,003 --> 00:39:08,579 Our humble thanks for attending Fight Back Bristol. 538 00:39:08,603 --> 00:39:10,059 We'll be back next week, 539 00:39:10,083 --> 00:39:12,458 so be sure to tell all of your friends. 540 00:39:12,483 --> 00:39:14,179 And remember - 541 00:39:14,202 --> 00:39:17,099 we will NEVER give up on you 542 00:39:17,123 --> 00:39:19,579 so, please, don't give up on yourselves. 543 00:39:19,603 --> 00:39:23,858 And if anyone should offer you drugs, what do we do? 544 00:39:23,882 --> 00:39:25,402 Just say no. 545 00:39:48,443 --> 00:39:51,579 Fight Back Bristol? What is that? 546 00:39:51,603 --> 00:39:55,259 Grassroots initiative. People like us with criminal records 547 00:39:55,282 --> 00:39:57,699 just trying to ensure that the kids 548 00:39:57,722 --> 00:40:00,219 don't make the same mistakes that we did. I mean, 549 00:40:00,242 --> 00:40:02,963 can't wait for the system to step in, can you? 550 00:40:06,043 --> 00:40:07,858 So you're all activists now? 551 00:40:07,882 --> 00:40:09,722 Just caring members of the community. 552 00:40:13,563 --> 00:40:17,362 You're feeling a deep ideological connection to the movement, are you? 553 00:40:20,922 --> 00:40:22,282 What's your home address? 554 00:40:27,523 --> 00:40:29,539 He lives in Clifton Towns. 555 00:40:29,563 --> 00:40:32,619 He can't speak for himself? Well, yeah, of course he can. 556 00:40:32,643 --> 00:40:35,259 But if what you're implying is that there's no place 557 00:40:35,282 --> 00:40:37,259 for a white, middle-class man in this, 558 00:40:37,282 --> 00:40:39,179 then you'd be wrong. In some ways... 559 00:40:39,202 --> 00:40:41,483 Spare me the lecture. Please. 560 00:41:03,762 --> 00:41:05,858 Are we OK? Everyone OK? 561 00:41:05,882 --> 00:41:08,978 John, are you OK? That was close! Ha! 562 00:41:09,003 --> 00:41:12,858 Yeah, way too close. Definitely way too close. 563 00:41:12,882 --> 00:41:16,619 Oh, come on, you've got to admit - it's a bit of a thrill. 564 00:41:16,643 --> 00:41:18,498 We weren't ziplining, Rani. 565 00:41:18,523 --> 00:41:20,938 Oh, my God. You're so boring! 566 00:41:20,963 --> 00:41:24,659 I don't want to run around with drugs and guns and money. 567 00:41:24,682 --> 00:41:26,898 That's different to being boring. 568 00:41:26,922 --> 00:41:29,099 Be careful, Rani. 569 00:41:29,123 --> 00:41:31,858 You know who told me this before? 570 00:41:31,882 --> 00:41:34,858 Who? Christian Taylor. 571 00:41:34,882 --> 00:41:36,539 And that's why he's in jail 572 00:41:36,563 --> 00:41:37,603 and I'm not. 573 00:41:39,523 --> 00:41:43,083 Hi, lovelies. How's the drug dealing going? 574 00:41:44,362 --> 00:41:46,123 You told her? 575 00:41:55,083 --> 00:41:58,659 My mum killed herself when I was six years old. 576 00:41:58,682 --> 00:42:00,139 My dad was never home 577 00:42:00,163 --> 00:42:05,059 so I was just passed from caretaker to caretaker. 578 00:42:05,083 --> 00:42:07,163 Never really had a real family. 579 00:42:09,443 --> 00:42:13,619 But all of us over the past few months, working together, 580 00:42:13,643 --> 00:42:14,963 laughing together... 581 00:42:16,802 --> 00:42:20,282 ..it's kind of felt like we were a family. 582 00:42:24,402 --> 00:42:26,619 I'm sorry, Gabby. We should never have involved you. 583 00:42:26,643 --> 00:42:30,298 I can only imagine how upsetting it must be to wake up 584 00:42:30,322 --> 00:42:35,259 and find yourself embroiled in a criminal conspiracy. 585 00:42:35,282 --> 00:42:37,378 I'm not upset because you've involved me 586 00:42:37,402 --> 00:42:39,858 in a criminal conspiracy. 587 00:42:39,882 --> 00:42:42,858 I'm upset because you haven't. 588 00:42:42,882 --> 00:42:45,938 What? I know everything about drugs. 589 00:42:45,963 --> 00:42:48,978 I've been using them since I was 12. 590 00:42:49,003 --> 00:42:50,818 I know what's good, I know what's bad, 591 00:42:50,842 --> 00:42:53,978 I know the jargon, the prices. 592 00:42:54,003 --> 00:42:55,938 I could help you. 593 00:42:55,963 --> 00:42:59,338 So you're saying you WANT to be a part of a criminal conspiracy? 594 00:42:59,362 --> 00:43:00,402 Yes! 595 00:43:02,043 --> 00:43:04,322 Now, which one of you is the Mr Big? 596 00:43:26,722 --> 00:43:28,563 What happened to you last night? 597 00:43:29,762 --> 00:43:31,579 I-I talked my way out of it 598 00:43:31,603 --> 00:43:33,139 but it was so awkward 599 00:43:33,163 --> 00:43:36,378 that even the bloke in the gimp mask couldn't look at me. 600 00:43:36,402 --> 00:43:39,699 Luckily, I managed to get away when an ambulance showed up. 601 00:43:39,722 --> 00:43:42,298 Some pervert got his fist stuck inside someone else. 602 00:43:42,322 --> 00:43:44,018 Did he lose his watch as well? 603 00:43:44,043 --> 00:43:47,539 I need to make a fresh transfer to Laycock Logistical Services. 604 00:43:47,563 --> 00:43:49,938 W—We froze the account. Well, now we need to thaw it out 605 00:43:49,963 --> 00:43:54,163 cos I've got a lot of logistics I need servicing. So, chop chop. Um... 606 00:44:26,523 --> 00:44:27,643 We did it. 607 00:44:36,163 --> 00:44:37,362 Ain't you happy? 608 00:44:38,963 --> 00:44:42,362 Yeah. Of course I am. Tell your face then. 609 00:44:46,603 --> 00:44:48,139 What's eating you? 610 00:44:48,163 --> 00:44:50,483 Nothing. Well, I... 611 00:44:52,242 --> 00:44:54,579 Ben said something but... 612 00:44:54,603 --> 00:44:56,882 ..it doesn't matter. It's fine. What did he say? 613 00:44:59,402 --> 00:45:01,059 He said I remind him of you. 614 00:45:01,083 --> 00:45:03,418 When you was in the sack? 615 00:45:03,443 --> 00:45:05,362 No. When we were arguing. 616 00:45:08,322 --> 00:45:10,858 I said he was boring, 617 00:45:10,882 --> 00:45:13,298 then he said that... 618 00:45:13,322 --> 00:45:15,842 ..I'm enjoying this gang shit too much. 619 00:45:18,242 --> 00:45:19,443 Are you? 620 00:45:20,802 --> 00:45:21,922 No. 621 00:45:25,762 --> 00:45:28,458 When me and Ben were just young guys, 622 00:45:28,483 --> 00:45:31,378 olders in our neighbourhood all had cars, 623 00:45:31,402 --> 00:45:35,619 nice jewellery and cash, working for The Dean. 624 00:45:35,643 --> 00:45:38,978 There was easy money to be made running with them. 625 00:45:39,003 --> 00:45:45,579 And on top of that, the status and respect and... 626 00:45:45,603 --> 00:45:49,163 ..you know, the hype gets addictive, right? 627 00:45:51,043 --> 00:45:54,858 Your boy Ben was smart. He resisted. 628 00:45:54,882 --> 00:45:58,338 Me? I started in country, 629 00:45:58,362 --> 00:46:00,458 then started running my own team. 630 00:46:00,483 --> 00:46:04,259 And the whole time, I'm thinking, "This isn't who I am." 631 00:46:04,282 --> 00:46:08,259 I'll just make some quick P's then go back to where I was. 632 00:46:08,282 --> 00:46:12,378 But one day, you wake up and it IS who you are. 633 00:46:12,402 --> 00:46:15,539 And it's too late to go back to where you was. 634 00:46:15,563 --> 00:46:19,018 And the next thing you know, you're wearing the same grey tracksuit 635 00:46:19,043 --> 00:46:21,539 with the same grey socks and the same grey underwear - 636 00:46:21,563 --> 00:46:24,378 because they're all washed together - 637 00:46:24,402 --> 00:46:28,938 spending 23 hours a day in the same four-square-metre room. 638 00:46:28,963 --> 00:46:30,563 Take it from me... 639 00:46:31,882 --> 00:46:33,483 ..that's boring. 640 00:46:47,083 --> 00:46:49,818 Four black Americanos, a masala chai 641 00:46:49,842 --> 00:46:51,659 and a piece of that cake. 642 00:46:51,682 --> 00:46:53,362 Right, two seconds. 643 00:46:55,842 --> 00:46:57,938 Morning. 644 00:46:57,963 --> 00:47:02,699 Right, there is a coffee there for you 645 00:47:02,722 --> 00:47:06,418 and a masala ch... Ooh! 646 00:47:06,443 --> 00:47:10,059 Shit! I am so sorry. Oh! 647 00:47:10,083 --> 00:47:12,202 Let's just get that off of there. 648 00:47:17,163 --> 00:47:19,219 Doesn't matter that it's a bit dry in there. 649 00:47:19,242 --> 00:47:21,762 Sorry about that. I'm more fingers than thumbs today. 650 00:47:23,163 --> 00:47:25,778 Right, let me get you some more tissues... Please. 651 00:47:25,802 --> 00:47:26,842 Coffee... 652 00:47:27,842 --> 00:47:30,523 Oh... Right, tissues, tissues. 653 00:47:33,483 --> 00:47:36,059 What was you doing in the house, all alone with a boy, 654 00:47:36,083 --> 00:47:38,778 without telling me? It's my house, too. Oh, it's your house? 655 00:47:38,802 --> 00:47:42,259 Do you pay bills? Do you know what? Furthermore, give me your phone. 656 00:47:42,282 --> 00:47:44,898 Why? Give me your phone. I want to know who the guy is. 657 00:47:44,922 --> 00:47:47,259 Give me your phone. He's none of your business. 658 00:47:47,282 --> 00:47:49,018 It was past midnight on a school night 659 00:47:49,043 --> 00:47:52,179 and you were here chilling with some boy. We were studying! 660 00:47:52,202 --> 00:47:55,259 This is why I want to live with Mum. Because she lets me do what I want. 661 00:47:55,282 --> 00:47:58,338 It's because she's a smackhead! Not any more! 662 00:47:58,362 --> 00:48:01,579 She just trusts me. 663 00:48:01,603 --> 00:48:02,882 Dickhead. 664 00:48:10,643 --> 00:48:13,059 You have to let her live her own life. Sometimes. 665 00:48:13,083 --> 00:48:17,978 Not yet I don't. She's 16. You can't protect her all the time. 666 00:48:18,003 --> 00:48:21,219 Yeah, well, I can try. Well, my parents tried. 667 00:48:21,242 --> 00:48:24,322 They tried to wrap me up in cotton wool my whole life. 668 00:48:26,003 --> 00:48:27,603 Look how I turned out. 669 00:48:28,963 --> 00:48:30,242 I'm a drug dealer. 670 00:48:36,322 --> 00:48:40,739 OK. You're not... boring. 671 00:48:40,762 --> 00:48:42,778 You're right. 672 00:48:42,802 --> 00:48:45,378 I was getting hooked on buzz. 673 00:48:45,402 --> 00:48:46,619 So, anyway, 674 00:48:46,643 --> 00:48:47,722 it... 675 00:48:48,842 --> 00:48:51,402 It's over. I'm back. 676 00:48:54,083 --> 00:48:55,523 I'm sorry. 677 00:49:01,242 --> 00:49:03,938 You were starting to scare me there. 678 00:49:03,963 --> 00:49:06,483 I thought I was sharing a bed with the Godfather. 679 00:49:11,043 --> 00:49:13,739 About Es. 680 00:49:13,762 --> 00:49:17,722 If things go wrong with your mum, she knows where to find you. 681 00:49:22,362 --> 00:49:26,043 Myrna? Claire? Um, have you got a minute? 682 00:49:27,443 --> 00:49:29,298 I just found something a bit odd, 683 00:49:29,322 --> 00:49:31,858 and I was wondering if you could help me get to the bottom of it. 684 00:49:31,882 --> 00:49:33,179 Something odd? 685 00:49:33,202 --> 00:49:35,739 Yeah, I was just going through the BJC bank account - you know, 686 00:49:35,762 --> 00:49:38,139 doing the money laundering due diligence and everything. 687 00:49:38,163 --> 00:49:42,739 I just found this payment on Claire's company card for £518. 688 00:49:42,762 --> 00:49:45,818 What? Let me see. Is that your card number? 689 00:49:45,842 --> 00:49:49,298 Yes, but what's Le Grande Poisson? 690 00:49:49,322 --> 00:49:51,699 I think it means "the big fish". It's, um, 691 00:49:51,722 --> 00:49:55,099 a fancy seafood place in Clifton. But did you use your BJC card 692 00:49:55,123 --> 00:49:56,898 to pay for a meal in there or anything? 693 00:49:56,922 --> 00:50:00,778 No, I've never even been there. No? It's probably some kind of mistake. 694 00:50:00,802 --> 00:50:03,402 Greg, could you call them, please? On it. 695 00:50:09,043 --> 00:50:10,938 Le Grand Poisson, how may I help? 696 00:50:10,963 --> 00:50:13,378 Uh, hi. Can I speak to your manager, please? This is he. 697 00:50:13,402 --> 00:50:15,418 Hi, my name's Myrna and I just wanted to check 698 00:50:15,443 --> 00:50:18,898 and see if a credit card was used in your restaurant last night. 699 00:50:18,922 --> 00:50:22,338 It ends in... 700 00:50:22,362 --> 00:50:23,739 Hold on, please. 701 00:50:23,762 --> 00:50:27,523 Someone probably stole your card. No, it's here. 702 00:50:28,643 --> 00:50:32,018 Yes. That card was used here last night. Right, um, 703 00:50:32,043 --> 00:50:34,018 can you tell me what it was spent on? 704 00:50:34,043 --> 00:50:36,259 Three dozen oysters, four lobster mains, 705 00:50:36,282 --> 00:50:39,018 a truffle mac and cheese, two bottles of champagne... 706 00:50:39,043 --> 00:50:42,563 Someone was peckish. ..and two masala chais. 707 00:50:44,242 --> 00:50:48,498 Right, so, that's your drink, isn't it? Yes, but... OK, thank you. 708 00:50:48,523 --> 00:50:50,139 You're welcome. 709 00:50:50,163 --> 00:50:54,219 Claire, if you were in my position, 710 00:50:54,242 --> 00:50:55,722 what would you do right now? 711 00:50:57,043 --> 00:51:00,858 This is... Someone has done this. Done what? 712 00:51:00,882 --> 00:51:02,778 I don't know. Made it look like... 713 00:51:02,802 --> 00:51:05,818 Claire, it gives me no pleasure to say this 714 00:51:05,842 --> 00:51:08,498 but, while we investigate this matter, 715 00:51:08,523 --> 00:51:11,418 I feel I have to suspend you. 716 00:51:11,443 --> 00:51:14,402 Suspend me? We need to be whiter-than-white. 717 00:51:17,123 --> 00:51:18,722 Erm... 718 00:51:20,362 --> 00:51:21,443 Yeah, sure. 719 00:51:54,003 --> 00:51:55,202 What? 720 00:51:57,483 --> 00:52:00,498 Activism is a fight. Sometimes, you have to fight dirty. 721 00:52:00,523 --> 00:52:02,483 What was I supposed to do? 722 00:52:17,083 --> 00:52:18,123 Hey. 723 00:52:20,282 --> 00:52:21,523 Hey. 724 00:52:24,762 --> 00:52:29,539 Hey, you were right. You know, about giving people second chances. 725 00:52:29,563 --> 00:52:32,682 About forgiveness. Seriously? 726 00:52:33,882 --> 00:52:35,978 If you ever need anything, 727 00:52:36,003 --> 00:52:40,242 just pick up the phone and I'll come, yeah? I'll be there. 728 00:52:43,603 --> 00:52:45,938 Come here. 729 00:52:45,963 --> 00:52:47,242 Thanks, Ben. 730 00:53:06,083 --> 00:53:08,523 We need to go for a little ride. 731 00:53:12,083 --> 00:53:14,179 You got me anything from the gift shop? 732 00:53:14,202 --> 00:53:17,659 All I've got for you is a deal. I'd prefer a muffin. 733 00:53:17,682 --> 00:53:20,659 I know Rani Rekowski and her friends are running your crew. 734 00:53:20,682 --> 00:53:24,099 And I know you're all in bed with The Dean. 735 00:53:24,123 --> 00:53:27,858 Do you know the numbers for this week's EuroMillions? 736 00:53:27,882 --> 00:53:30,259 Co-operate. 737 00:53:30,282 --> 00:53:32,378 Help me collar The Dean, 738 00:53:32,402 --> 00:53:36,539 and I'll get you out of here. How does that sound? 739 00:53:36,563 --> 00:53:39,402 Like a great episode of Line Of Duty. 740 00:53:43,483 --> 00:53:45,539 Do you think it hasn't been noticed by people in here 741 00:53:45,563 --> 00:53:48,018 how many times I've visited you? 742 00:53:48,043 --> 00:53:49,298 Do you know how easy it would be 743 00:53:49,322 --> 00:53:52,242 for me to spread the word around that you're my favourite informant? 744 00:53:54,163 --> 00:53:56,362 How long do you think you'd last after that? 745 00:53:59,882 --> 00:54:01,443 Think about my offer. 746 00:54:33,163 --> 00:54:35,458 Evening, all. 747 00:54:35,483 --> 00:54:37,739 I have good news 748 00:54:37,762 --> 00:54:41,322 and I have even better news. 749 00:54:42,802 --> 00:54:46,699 The good news is, I have received payment, in full, on time, 750 00:54:46,722 --> 00:54:49,978 as you promised. I'll be honest, I didn't think you'd make it. 751 00:54:50,003 --> 00:54:54,619 And my boys are livid. They dug ditches out the back for nothing. 752 00:54:54,643 --> 00:54:58,778 Now, on to the even better news. 753 00:54:58,802 --> 00:55:01,418 What's that? This, my dear, 754 00:55:01,443 --> 00:55:05,579 is ten kilos of pure uncut cocaine 755 00:55:05,603 --> 00:55:09,099 that you are going to shift for me. 756 00:55:09,123 --> 00:55:11,539 No. We're done. 757 00:55:11,563 --> 00:55:14,378 No, you're The Beatles of drug selling 758 00:55:14,402 --> 00:55:17,298 and I can't break up the band. Don't make me the Yoko. 759 00:55:17,322 --> 00:55:19,818 And think of this as your White Album. 760 00:55:19,842 --> 00:55:21,018 This isn't fair! 761 00:55:21,043 --> 00:55:22,619 We did what you asked! 762 00:55:22,643 --> 00:55:24,003 Fair? 763 00:55:25,603 --> 00:55:30,059 You're lucky your parents aren't on TV, in tears, 764 00:55:30,083 --> 00:55:35,659 asking for information of your fucking whereabouts. 765 00:55:35,682 --> 00:55:38,739 We're not doing it. This is over. 766 00:55:38,762 --> 00:55:42,139 This is over when I say it's over. 767 00:55:42,163 --> 00:55:43,778 And I'm sorry, 768 00:55:43,802 --> 00:55:46,842 but it ain't fucking over. 769 00:56:04,443 --> 00:56:05,978 He's never going to stop. 770 00:56:06,003 --> 00:56:09,938 Why would he? He's on to a good thing. 771 00:56:09,963 --> 00:56:14,259 I cannot deal drugs for the rest of my days. 772 00:56:14,282 --> 00:56:16,579 Obviously! None of us can. 773 00:56:16,603 --> 00:56:19,778 Right, what are we going to do? 774 00:56:19,802 --> 00:56:22,163 We'll kill him. Sorry, what? 775 00:56:24,083 --> 00:56:28,619 Well, any other ideas before we settle on murder? 776 00:56:28,643 --> 00:56:31,362 Anyone heard of the Brass Bunkum? 777 00:56:34,722 --> 00:56:39,498 Short Change Hero by The Heavy 778 00:56:39,523 --> 00:56:43,938 ♪ I can't see where you comin' from 779 00:56:43,963 --> 00:56:48,219 ♪ But I know just what you runnin' from 780 00:56:48,242 --> 00:56:53,219 ♪ And what matters ain't the "who's baddest" but the 781 00:56:53,242 --> 00:56:57,699 ♪ Ones who stop you fallin' from your ladder, when you're 782 00:56:57,722 --> 00:57:00,402 ♪ This ain't no place for no hero 783 00:57:02,202 --> 00:57:06,378 ♪ This ain't no place for no better man 784 00:57:06,402 --> 00:57:09,938 ♪ This ain't no place for no hero 785 00:57:09,963 --> 00:57:12,123 ♪ To call home 786 00:57:15,682 --> 00:57:18,882 ♪ This ain't no place for no hero 787 00:57:20,123 --> 00:57:24,778 ♪ This ain't no place for no better man 788 00:57:24,802 --> 00:57:27,858 ♪ This ain't no place for no hero 789 00:57:27,882 --> 00:57:30,043 ♪ To call home... ♪