1 00:00:44,910 --> 00:00:50,750 And it's Harvey Baines, six times winner of the Decathlon. And he breaks through 2 00:00:50,750 --> 00:00:57,390 the pain barrier and stuns this crowd with an amazing show of stamina and 3 00:00:57,390 --> 00:00:59,450 real hairy male virility. 4 00:01:00,830 --> 00:01:02,410 Brave you some days. 5 00:01:02,850 --> 00:01:04,250 No! No! 6 00:01:04,750 --> 00:01:05,750 Oh! 7 00:01:12,410 --> 00:01:13,810 Every Sunday. 8 00:01:14,700 --> 00:01:16,340 Every damn Sunday. 9 00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:18,840 I hate my life. 10 00:01:22,380 --> 00:01:28,280 It's just a question of mind over matter. You have to see your fist going 11 00:01:28,280 --> 00:01:29,480 through the tongue. 12 00:01:30,080 --> 00:01:31,080 I know. 13 00:01:32,540 --> 00:01:34,920 This ancient is an art. 14 00:01:35,120 --> 00:01:38,300 You can't tell me how to suck grandmother's eggs. 15 00:01:39,860 --> 00:01:40,860 What? 16 00:01:59,580 --> 00:02:01,260 Portuguese. Me. 17 00:02:01,900 --> 00:02:03,300 Real man. 18 00:02:13,460 --> 00:02:17,560 Go on, 19 00:02:19,440 --> 00:02:20,440 Basil, you show him. 20 00:02:37,260 --> 00:02:38,260 all going tomorrow. 21 00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:40,020 Yes, but that's for a funeral. 22 00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:42,840 Yes, but we don't want to wear God out. He'll get sick of us. 23 00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:45,000 Whose funeral? 24 00:02:45,660 --> 00:02:46,660 Sid Bingham Basil. 25 00:02:47,120 --> 00:02:48,120 Is he dead? 26 00:02:48,680 --> 00:02:51,560 I thought he was getting a bit slow at the old dominoes. 27 00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:54,920 Maybe they want to go with you. Don't be silly. 28 00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:57,720 Sunday morning follows Saturday night. 29 00:02:58,080 --> 00:02:59,940 And we all know what that means. 30 00:03:00,500 --> 00:03:02,040 Last tango in Bournemouth. 31 00:03:03,860 --> 00:03:08,580 I don't think sin is in any way humorous. Well, it depends how you do 32 00:03:10,380 --> 00:03:11,740 Come along, Marjorie. 33 00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:17,760 Who's Jane's chum? 34 00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:19,480 Marjorie Evans. 35 00:03:19,500 --> 00:03:20,820 She's a spiritualist. 36 00:03:23,180 --> 00:03:24,180 Oh, Harvey! 37 00:03:25,300 --> 00:03:26,300 Yeah! 38 00:03:27,220 --> 00:03:28,240 All right! 39 00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:29,520 Hello, Harvey! 40 00:03:30,780 --> 00:03:32,240 Anybody want a Sunday paper? 41 00:03:33,060 --> 00:03:34,060 They're in the ditch. 42 00:04:02,540 --> 00:04:03,580 Horace bites the dust. 43 00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:06,180 Do you want some tea, Tom? 44 00:04:08,440 --> 00:04:11,420 My God, I've made it through the night. 45 00:04:13,140 --> 00:04:14,440 What's the matter with you? 46 00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:18,920 Elapsed lung, broken elbow, slipped buttock. 47 00:04:19,579 --> 00:04:22,340 Grumble, grumble, grumble. Do you want one lump or two? 48 00:04:22,700 --> 00:04:23,720 Twenty -five, please. 49 00:04:24,900 --> 00:04:29,120 I feel like I've slept on a pile of rubble. 50 00:04:29,740 --> 00:04:30,900 Thank you very much. 51 00:04:36,650 --> 00:04:37,389 up on the floor. 52 00:04:37,390 --> 00:04:40,530 Because you don't have my stubborn determination not to end up on the 53 00:04:40,770 --> 00:04:42,690 I don't have your steel -tipped elbows. 54 00:04:44,510 --> 00:04:46,570 We must get a double bed. No. 55 00:04:47,070 --> 00:04:48,070 Why not? 56 00:04:48,250 --> 00:04:50,750 It's ridiculous, us bunking up like teenagers. 57 00:04:51,390 --> 00:04:53,170 It'll be the back of minis next. 58 00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:56,750 Why don't we get a decent -sized bed? 59 00:04:57,090 --> 00:05:00,110 Because I do not like sleeping with you. 60 00:05:00,490 --> 00:05:02,070 You have a funny way of showing it. 61 00:05:05,160 --> 00:05:07,440 no particular aversion to the old shake, rattle and roll. 62 00:05:07,680 --> 00:05:08,680 I can tell that. 63 00:05:09,100 --> 00:05:12,600 You're the only person I know who could actually sing the 1812. 64 00:05:13,640 --> 00:05:17,380 But I like to sleep alone. I don't know why, once you've done your bit for 65 00:05:17,380 --> 00:05:19,480 England, you can't shove off back to your own bed. 66 00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:22,360 What are you waiting for, the critics? 67 00:05:23,820 --> 00:05:27,160 I have a weak heart and I'm slightly diabetic. 68 00:05:28,780 --> 00:05:32,640 So? So, it takes me eight muesli bars to get as far as I do. 69 00:05:33,340 --> 00:05:36,570 Come the... final whistle, I'm damn nearly in a coma as it is. 70 00:05:36,950 --> 00:05:39,970 I'd never make it back to base camp in that condition. 71 00:05:41,190 --> 00:05:43,870 My God, you think you've got mobility problems. 72 00:05:44,250 --> 00:05:47,990 I tell you, after midnight it takes six mechanics of lock and tackle and a 73 00:05:47,990 --> 00:05:49,490 blowtorch to get me off me davit. 74 00:05:51,450 --> 00:05:56,490 Oh, I do so enjoy our gentle, loving relationship in the autumn of our year. 75 00:05:56,490 --> 00:05:58,930 yes, I know. It's a hoot, isn't it? 76 00:06:01,320 --> 00:06:03,360 what's in the social calendar for next week. 77 00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:05,500 Oh, let me think now. 78 00:06:05,760 --> 00:06:09,440 Lunch in Paris, tea at Windsor, cocktails in Antigua. What do you think? 79 00:06:09,440 --> 00:06:11,300 Nothing. Oh, come on, cheer up. 80 00:06:11,600 --> 00:06:14,140 There's a nice funeral at St. Matthias tomorrow. 81 00:06:14,460 --> 00:06:17,540 God, not another one. What's going on round here? Do people actually dump 82 00:06:17,540 --> 00:06:18,640 dead on our doorstep? 83 00:06:19,580 --> 00:06:23,040 Still, I'm fed up with funerals. They're no fun at all. 84 00:06:23,260 --> 00:06:24,420 They're not supposed to be fun. 85 00:06:25,020 --> 00:06:28,840 Just let's hope that the Reverend Dennis doesn't make a total arse of himself 86 00:06:28,840 --> 00:06:29,840 again. 87 00:06:30,990 --> 00:06:34,970 So nice to see so many familiar faces at this, our harvest festival. 88 00:06:35,190 --> 00:06:36,310 James Chubby Chum. 89 00:06:36,530 --> 00:06:37,570 Harvest funeral. 90 00:06:37,950 --> 00:06:40,130 No. Funeral. Don't know. 91 00:06:40,370 --> 00:06:45,430 A funeral, of course, makes us think of death. 92 00:06:45,950 --> 00:06:46,950 Fancy. 93 00:06:47,730 --> 00:06:51,950 Is death a beginning, or is it an end? 94 00:06:52,950 --> 00:06:59,030 Or is it the end of a beginning, or the beginning of an end? 95 00:06:59,980 --> 00:07:02,220 Or is it the beginning of a beginning? 96 00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:04,860 Or the end of an ending? 97 00:07:05,180 --> 00:07:06,260 Who knows? 98 00:07:06,500 --> 00:07:07,500 Who cares? 99 00:07:07,740 --> 00:07:08,740 Get on with it! 100 00:07:10,540 --> 00:07:13,520 Death is, of course, all of these things. 101 00:07:14,220 --> 00:07:16,180 Yet none of these things. 102 00:07:16,620 --> 00:07:17,620 Oh, my God. 103 00:07:18,720 --> 00:07:25,660 Death is merely a transition. The death of the body is immaterial, for the 104 00:07:25,660 --> 00:07:27,500 spirit is still with us. 105 00:07:27,900 --> 00:07:28,900 Oh, yes! 106 00:07:46,990 --> 00:07:49,430 Can we get a move on, please? I have a hair appointment. 107 00:07:50,090 --> 00:07:51,090 Yes, you do. 108 00:07:53,770 --> 00:07:56,490 Have some respect. Yes, have some respect. 109 00:07:57,570 --> 00:08:00,030 Dennis, you pull your finger out or we'll be here all night. 110 00:08:01,090 --> 00:08:07,750 Right. If there be any person present who knows the reason 111 00:08:07,750 --> 00:08:11,910 why these two people should not be joined... Oh, no. 112 00:08:13,490 --> 00:08:14,710 That's not right, is it? 113 00:08:17,450 --> 00:08:18,770 I feel so many vibrations. 114 00:08:19,270 --> 00:08:22,550 So many voices are trying to get through to me. 115 00:08:22,910 --> 00:08:24,030 Who? Who? 116 00:08:24,550 --> 00:08:30,010 Let me concentrate on you. 117 00:08:31,670 --> 00:08:34,789 Deirdre, did you know a Deirdre? 118 00:08:36,470 --> 00:08:37,470 Can't remember. 119 00:08:39,990 --> 00:08:44,710 Deirdre, did she have a dagger tattooed on her left buttock? 120 00:08:49,160 --> 00:08:50,160 It's rather confusing. 121 00:08:50,260 --> 00:08:54,500 Look, why don't you all come to Marjorie's show tomorrow? 122 00:08:55,580 --> 00:09:02,220 Gathering? Jane, we just gather and listen to the voices of the 123 00:09:02,220 --> 00:09:04,280 departed. Oh, wait a moment. 124 00:09:04,520 --> 00:09:08,180 I have a John coming through. John? Anyone? 125 00:09:08,420 --> 00:09:10,600 Oh, my John! 126 00:09:11,280 --> 00:09:13,200 Definitely a John. 127 00:09:13,620 --> 00:09:15,860 Now, was he tall? 128 00:09:16,100 --> 00:09:17,100 No. 129 00:09:17,960 --> 00:09:19,380 Very tall. What's going on? 130 00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:21,360 She's talking to dead people. 131 00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:22,820 I know how she feels. 132 00:09:25,400 --> 00:09:27,400 Don't leave it until my gathering. 133 00:09:27,640 --> 00:09:29,480 Oh, yes. And how much does that cost? 134 00:09:29,800 --> 00:09:32,220 Diana. Oh, wake up, you silly ducks. 135 00:09:32,660 --> 00:09:36,440 She's just going round recruiting for a concert. She's going round old folks' 136 00:09:36,560 --> 00:09:38,500 homes trying to get customers. Am I right? 137 00:09:38,700 --> 00:09:43,520 You're entitled to your opinion, my dear. Yes. And how much does it cost to 138 00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:44,620 to your gathering? 139 00:09:45,140 --> 00:09:46,140 Nothing. 140 00:09:46,380 --> 00:09:48,740 I do it because I can do it. 141 00:09:49,140 --> 00:09:52,080 And yes, of course, I go to the bereaved for my audience. 142 00:09:52,440 --> 00:09:55,120 There would be very little point in going to anyone else. 143 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:56,620 She's got you there, Diana. 144 00:09:56,880 --> 00:09:59,980 Well, don't you try getting through to any of my dead pals. 145 00:10:00,340 --> 00:10:03,080 They're all drunken journalists anyway. Couldn't find their way through the 146 00:10:03,080 --> 00:10:04,560 door, never mind that cosmic ether. 147 00:10:05,620 --> 00:10:07,860 You lot, do you want to get conned? Fine. 148 00:10:08,440 --> 00:10:09,540 Include me out. 149 00:10:10,300 --> 00:10:13,060 Did you have an American friend called Henry? 150 00:10:16,490 --> 00:10:17,490 I did not. 151 00:10:17,650 --> 00:10:18,710 Known as Hal. 152 00:10:21,910 --> 00:10:23,250 Must have got it wrong. 153 00:10:24,950 --> 00:10:29,790 Now, who had a wife called Maggie? 154 00:10:31,370 --> 00:10:32,370 No Maggie. 155 00:10:33,390 --> 00:10:37,450 I'm getting a very strong message from someone called Maggie. Tom! 156 00:10:37,970 --> 00:10:38,970 Maggie! 157 00:10:39,410 --> 00:10:40,410 Maggie! 158 00:11:07,340 --> 00:11:08,660 It's all passing me by. 159 00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:09,960 What is? 160 00:11:10,180 --> 00:11:11,180 Life. 161 00:11:11,340 --> 00:11:15,640 A few years ago, I was a young Turk. I was one of Thatcher's boyos. 162 00:11:16,220 --> 00:11:19,980 An operator, a man with an edge, a mover and a groover. 163 00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:22,560 Oh, God, I was marvellous. 164 00:11:23,720 --> 00:11:27,120 You still are, Harvey. Of course I'm not. I'm still here. 165 00:11:27,960 --> 00:11:31,080 My original business plan said that I should have just made my first damn 166 00:11:31,080 --> 00:11:35,080 payment on my own personal helicopter, not my last payment on my larder. 167 00:11:36,940 --> 00:11:39,420 I was at business school with. They're all in jail by now. 168 00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:41,300 But not me. Oh, no. 169 00:11:41,660 --> 00:11:43,960 No, I couldn't manage a massive fraud in a fit. 170 00:11:44,740 --> 00:11:46,820 You've always got me, Harvey. 171 00:11:47,320 --> 00:11:48,780 Don't kick a man when he's dying. 172 00:11:51,380 --> 00:11:55,900 Perhaps you should try seeking a more spiritual path. 173 00:11:56,300 --> 00:11:57,300 How? 174 00:11:57,500 --> 00:12:01,420 You also could seek guidance from your dear departed ones. 175 00:12:02,460 --> 00:12:06,260 Haven't you lost someone in your past to whom you were close? 176 00:12:06,990 --> 00:12:08,210 Yes, well, I suppose old Benny. 177 00:12:08,750 --> 00:12:10,470 Benny? Who is he? 178 00:12:10,990 --> 00:12:11,990 An uncle? 179 00:12:12,130 --> 00:12:14,270 No, just a kind old fellow I knew as a kid. 180 00:12:14,770 --> 00:12:17,530 Oh, well, let's try and get in touch with him. 181 00:12:17,910 --> 00:12:21,030 But every stupid Jane, I wouldn't be seen dead at a sound. 182 00:12:23,470 --> 00:12:26,070 Hello? Is that the Los Angeles Times? 183 00:12:26,770 --> 00:12:27,770 It is. 184 00:12:27,830 --> 00:12:29,790 And you are the editor's assistant. 185 00:12:31,270 --> 00:12:34,750 Yes, never mind. Have a nice day. This is long distance, so shut your face and 186 00:12:34,750 --> 00:12:35,750 listen. 187 00:12:38,120 --> 00:12:40,880 No, I have not thought of hostility aversion therapy. 188 00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:44,920 I just want you to tell me what has happened to an old colleague of mine who 189 00:12:44,920 --> 00:12:47,720 used to work on your paper called Henry Cheswick. 190 00:12:48,620 --> 00:12:49,620 Yes, that's right. 191 00:12:49,740 --> 00:12:50,740 Hal. 192 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:53,420 Right -o. Bye -bye. See you tomorrow. 193 00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:58,780 That's the sort of woman you want for the winter. 194 00:12:59,100 --> 00:13:00,100 That's enough, Basil. 195 00:13:00,740 --> 00:13:03,660 It's time you curved your lecherous and sexist ways. 196 00:13:04,120 --> 00:13:08,050 What? In fact, it's time we all changed our ways. 197 00:13:08,490 --> 00:13:12,530 I don't want to change my ways. I like being a grubby old stoat. 198 00:13:13,910 --> 00:13:15,050 Hello, Beryl. 199 00:13:15,250 --> 00:13:17,370 Fancy a couple of laps round the jacuzzi? 200 00:13:28,110 --> 00:13:29,110 Hello. 201 00:13:29,830 --> 00:13:31,310 Oh, off on your travels. 202 00:13:31,570 --> 00:13:32,650 Where have you gone? 203 00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:39,220 Maggie. Oh, off to see the wife. Fair enough. Say hello from me. 204 00:13:40,480 --> 00:13:42,300 I've just been talking to Maggie. 205 00:13:42,620 --> 00:13:43,620 Sorry? 206 00:13:43,920 --> 00:13:45,260 Through Marjorie Evans. 207 00:13:45,680 --> 00:13:49,120 Oh, Tom, give me a break. Marjorie Evans is a fraud. 208 00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:51,780 I don't think she can be. 209 00:13:52,480 --> 00:13:53,439 Come on. 210 00:13:53,440 --> 00:13:54,620 Tell Auntie Di. 211 00:13:55,300 --> 00:13:57,060 I was also sceptical. 212 00:13:57,560 --> 00:14:02,120 But through her, Maggie mentioned things that only she and I could possibly know 213 00:14:02,120 --> 00:14:03,280 about. Such as? 214 00:14:04,060 --> 00:14:06,110 Well... My favourite wireless programmes. 215 00:14:06,870 --> 00:14:11,230 Walks they used to go on. Special meals they used to cook for me. Yes, work, 216 00:14:11,350 --> 00:14:17,970 Tom. Favourite programmes are Itmar, Brainstrust, Walks, Cotswold, Favourite 217 00:14:17,970 --> 00:14:19,990 Foods, you, Worse Lamorous Beef. 218 00:14:20,290 --> 00:14:21,290 Pretty good. 219 00:14:21,330 --> 00:14:22,890 Oh, I see it is all nonsense. 220 00:14:23,550 --> 00:14:27,750 But she also knew that I brushed Maggie's hair while listening to the 221 00:14:27,750 --> 00:14:32,350 service. And she knew our secret names for each other. 222 00:14:33,670 --> 00:14:36,180 So? What did Maggie have to say? 223 00:14:37,400 --> 00:14:38,640 I've betrayed her. 224 00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:44,780 What? Just because she's gone these many years doesn't mean her spirit has tired 225 00:14:44,780 --> 00:14:50,380 of me. She said she gained comfort from my holding on to her memory, my being 226 00:14:50,380 --> 00:14:51,380 faithful to her. 227 00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:58,160 Tom, this is crazy. But now she feels that I have sullied our marriage through 228 00:14:58,160 --> 00:14:59,160 taking up with you. 229 00:15:00,109 --> 00:15:02,170 Tom, I know your wife. 230 00:15:02,430 --> 00:15:05,790 You do not. Yes, I do. I know her through you. She was a great woman. You 231 00:15:05,790 --> 00:15:09,870 incredibly lucky to have her. She had a heart the size of a football pitch. She 232 00:15:09,870 --> 00:15:12,110 would not begrudge you one second of happiness. 233 00:15:12,350 --> 00:15:15,470 She would rejoice in your thing with me. 234 00:15:15,690 --> 00:15:17,470 Maybe I've sanctified her. 235 00:15:18,110 --> 00:15:22,910 Maybe she wasn't so open and giving. All I know is that she has been certain 236 00:15:22,910 --> 00:15:28,770 by... My taking up of you. Tom, you have not sanctified her memory. She was a 237 00:15:28,770 --> 00:15:31,210 wonderful woman, and I will not hear one word against her. 238 00:15:31,490 --> 00:15:33,110 She wants us to split up. 239 00:15:33,390 --> 00:15:35,970 Oh, my God, I don't believe this. This is crazy. 240 00:15:36,750 --> 00:15:39,470 And I think I know who's behind all this. 241 00:15:39,690 --> 00:15:40,690 Oh! 242 00:15:40,830 --> 00:15:44,910 Tom, this is paranormal claptrap. 243 00:15:45,210 --> 00:15:47,090 What about your American friend, Henry? 244 00:15:47,690 --> 00:15:48,690 How? 245 00:15:49,430 --> 00:15:50,470 I'll see you later. 246 00:15:59,790 --> 00:16:01,590 Old people are very good at it. 247 00:16:01,810 --> 00:16:02,810 I beg your pardon? 248 00:16:03,050 --> 00:16:06,150 Getting in touch with the, uh, dear departed. 249 00:16:06,810 --> 00:16:09,890 I expect, uh, your family do it all the time. 250 00:16:10,370 --> 00:16:13,910 My family get in touch with the dead. They can hardly be bothered to get in 251 00:16:13,910 --> 00:16:15,390 touch with the living. What are you getting at? 252 00:16:17,550 --> 00:16:18,550 Voodoo. 253 00:16:19,970 --> 00:16:21,390 Voodoo? Yes. 254 00:16:21,710 --> 00:16:23,210 I've read all about it. 255 00:16:23,810 --> 00:16:26,670 You know, doing nasty things to chickens. 256 00:16:30,510 --> 00:16:32,950 Oh, yes, there's a lot of voodoo in Bournemouth. 257 00:16:33,310 --> 00:16:34,850 Really? Oh, yes. 258 00:16:35,270 --> 00:16:38,790 Chickens can't walk the streets of Bournemouth without being torn to shreds 259 00:16:38,790 --> 00:16:39,790 zombies. 260 00:16:40,110 --> 00:16:42,310 Zombies? I never knew. 261 00:16:44,770 --> 00:16:49,690 Come here, you malevolent little weasel. Oh, Diana, you can't treat me like 262 00:16:49,690 --> 00:16:51,530 this. I'm not Harvey. 263 00:16:52,730 --> 00:16:55,150 What have you been saying to that Marjorie creature? 264 00:16:56,840 --> 00:17:00,360 Well, somebody has been feeding her private information about Tom and his 265 00:17:00,360 --> 00:17:04,040 Maggie. I heard they'd been united across the void. 266 00:17:04,319 --> 00:17:09,680 Well, you will be chucked down the void if you don't... But what have I done? 267 00:17:10,040 --> 00:17:12,579 Well, you've always had the vapours about Tom and me shacking up together. 268 00:17:12,839 --> 00:17:17,780 And now you have got your bloody spooks woman to say that Maggie disapproves of 269 00:17:17,780 --> 00:17:20,480 our set -up and poor old Tom's so gullible he wants to break it off. 270 00:17:29,100 --> 00:17:30,280 She's not wicked, Diana. 271 00:17:30,580 --> 00:17:32,620 It's after the mouth, but never wicked. 272 00:17:32,920 --> 00:17:38,040 Well, somebody is spreading the poison, and I intend to continue my inquiries. 273 00:17:38,980 --> 00:17:39,980 What's for lunch? 274 00:17:40,580 --> 00:17:41,580 Shredded chicken. 275 00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:48,920 Oh, mighty Geoffrey, what fresh hell is this? 276 00:17:49,860 --> 00:17:51,280 This is our new home, Diana. 277 00:17:51,540 --> 00:17:53,040 But it is a waste land. 278 00:17:53,380 --> 00:17:56,360 We had to leave the last place because of complaints about Marion from the 279 00:17:56,360 --> 00:17:57,540 neighbours. So... 280 00:17:57,790 --> 00:18:00,890 Using lateral thinking, I decide that rather than get rid of Marion, we get 281 00:18:00,890 --> 00:18:01,849 of the neighbours. 282 00:18:01,850 --> 00:18:03,730 They're bound to group around you eventually. 283 00:18:04,370 --> 00:18:05,570 Not once they've met Marion. 284 00:18:08,330 --> 00:18:10,990 Where is the glue -sniffing little trollop? 285 00:18:11,610 --> 00:18:12,650 Yes, ma 'am, Diana. 286 00:18:13,310 --> 00:18:17,430 Yes. I want to talk to you about your mother, Maggie. 287 00:18:18,070 --> 00:18:20,190 Do you think she would have disapproved of me? 288 00:18:21,430 --> 00:18:23,450 Oh, mother was very unpredictable indeed. 289 00:18:24,070 --> 00:18:26,310 You answer the question, Geoffrey. 290 00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:28,280 Would she have taken a gin me? 291 00:18:28,820 --> 00:18:30,460 No, she could be very, very odd. 292 00:18:31,320 --> 00:18:32,960 You and she would probably have been great friends. 293 00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:34,800 Just as I thought. 294 00:18:35,860 --> 00:18:38,440 Do you know a spiritualist called Marjorie Evans? 295 00:18:38,680 --> 00:18:39,539 Not personally. 296 00:18:39,540 --> 00:18:40,820 What about old Dragon's Breath? 297 00:18:41,260 --> 00:18:44,540 She knows every alternative crackpot from here to Peking. I believe the Evans 298 00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:46,360 woman is currently top of her fad chart. 299 00:18:47,260 --> 00:18:48,260 Talk as much. 300 00:18:49,020 --> 00:18:52,200 Vicious little shrew. I should go and poke her eyes out right now. 301 00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:54,620 I'd rather you didn't, Diana. Driving's bad enough as it is. 302 00:18:56,330 --> 00:18:57,330 What's he done? 303 00:18:58,010 --> 00:18:59,550 Something very evil. 304 00:19:00,550 --> 00:19:01,630 Come inside, Geoffrey. 305 00:19:01,970 --> 00:19:04,410 We have to spread a little disinformation. 306 00:19:04,990 --> 00:19:07,990 Am I supposed to understand what you're talking about? Don't worry, Geoffrey. 307 00:19:08,010 --> 00:19:11,270 I'll write it all down for you in very big letters. That's very kind. 308 00:19:26,300 --> 00:19:27,300 Holidays, Tom? 309 00:19:28,300 --> 00:19:33,200 I'm moving into the guest apartment until I can decide what to do to atone. 310 00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:36,300 see. Do you have no regard for me at all? 311 00:19:36,880 --> 00:19:38,160 Of course I do. 312 00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:41,960 It's just that... It's just you thought you'd bugger off and leave me in the 313 00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:42,960 lurch. 314 00:19:43,100 --> 00:19:45,400 Our situation can't go on like this. 315 00:19:45,680 --> 00:19:47,520 You are a swine, Tom. 316 00:19:47,820 --> 00:19:50,780 I expect so. You have obligations to me. 317 00:19:51,020 --> 00:19:53,600 But I was married to Maggie. We made vows. 318 00:19:54,090 --> 00:19:55,730 So to hell with what you feel about me. 319 00:19:56,930 --> 00:19:59,170 I can't cut myself in two. 320 00:19:59,510 --> 00:20:05,010 Look, Tom, over the last few years, we have crawled across bloody minefields 321 00:20:05,010 --> 00:20:09,050 together. Fought the good fight and usually won. And when age and 322 00:20:09,050 --> 00:20:12,090 have tried to mug us, we've managed to fight back and rattle on for a bit 323 00:20:12,090 --> 00:20:16,290 longer. Now you want to just throw it all away. You want to wimp off like some 324 00:20:16,290 --> 00:20:20,450 frightened rabbit scared of the dark or some bogeyman. I was married to Maggie 325 00:20:20,450 --> 00:20:21,850 for 37 years. 326 00:20:22,270 --> 00:20:23,270 We had a son. 327 00:20:23,740 --> 00:20:25,300 I mean, you can't hold Geoffrey against her. 328 00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:27,980 Sorry, Diana. 329 00:20:29,020 --> 00:20:33,440 In here I know what's right, however much it hurts. 330 00:20:34,620 --> 00:20:36,500 Well, just one favour, Tom. 331 00:20:37,380 --> 00:20:38,380 Of course? 332 00:20:38,660 --> 00:20:42,600 Let's just investigate this Marjorie creature one step further. 333 00:20:42,860 --> 00:20:48,620 Why? She seems pretty good. Well, let's just make 100 % sure. Let's go to her 334 00:20:48,620 --> 00:20:49,740 little gathering. 335 00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:54,580 See if Maggie turns up again. And then ask her things that absolutely only you 336 00:20:54,580 --> 00:20:57,680 could know the details of. Things that only you and she can have experienced. 337 00:20:59,140 --> 00:21:00,140 Please, would you do that? 338 00:21:00,340 --> 00:21:01,340 For me? 339 00:21:03,240 --> 00:21:04,240 Yes. 340 00:21:05,420 --> 00:21:07,360 Yes, Diana. Of course I will. 341 00:21:13,940 --> 00:21:16,860 Sometimes I hate myself. 342 00:21:18,180 --> 00:21:19,180 But not much. 343 00:21:24,490 --> 00:21:27,950 Marjorie is a wonderfully sincere person, Harvey. 344 00:21:28,210 --> 00:21:29,210 Aren't we all, Jane? 345 00:21:30,350 --> 00:21:34,310 Let's hope she can contact your Benny. It's all I live for. 346 00:21:36,530 --> 00:21:39,130 You don't really have to come to this today. 347 00:21:40,190 --> 00:21:42,630 If this woman's in touch with Mum, I've got a question for her. 348 00:21:42,910 --> 00:21:45,410 What? Does marriage continue after death? 349 00:21:47,910 --> 00:21:50,470 I managed to sow the seeds. 350 00:21:50,890 --> 00:21:52,390 I don't know if they've been passed on. 351 00:21:55,180 --> 00:21:56,960 Maggie will come again today. 352 00:21:58,240 --> 00:21:59,940 I'd like a bit more proof. 353 00:22:00,460 --> 00:22:03,900 Well, ask her about something only you could know. 354 00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:06,200 The honeymoon, for instance. 355 00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:08,980 Yes, I do. 356 00:22:12,260 --> 00:22:13,740 Yes, Jimmy. 357 00:22:14,140 --> 00:22:16,380 I have a Jimmy here. 358 00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:18,440 Smokes a pipe. 359 00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:19,660 Jimmy Piper. 360 00:22:19,980 --> 00:22:23,100 That's it. Like I said, Jimmy Piper. 361 00:22:28,900 --> 00:22:32,720 Now, your Jimmy, he died of a heart attack, didn't he? 362 00:22:33,360 --> 00:22:35,100 No, it was a motorcycle accident. 363 00:22:35,900 --> 00:22:39,240 It was the heart attack that caused the accident. 364 00:22:40,060 --> 00:22:41,180 I didn't know. 365 00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:43,280 That's what Jimmy says. 366 00:22:43,880 --> 00:22:45,400 And he wishes you well. 367 00:22:45,880 --> 00:22:49,820 And he still loves you dearly. 368 00:22:52,860 --> 00:22:54,180 Oh, here's a Benny. 369 00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:56,000 Anyone know a Benny? 370 00:22:56,340 --> 00:22:57,700 Harvey, it's you. 371 00:22:58,060 --> 00:22:59,060 Come on. 372 00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:01,680 It's him here. It's him. 373 00:23:02,100 --> 00:23:04,260 I think we should go to this man. 374 00:23:04,760 --> 00:23:06,200 He's named Harvey. 375 00:23:06,420 --> 00:23:08,100 Do come down, Mr. Harvey. 376 00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:11,480 Jane, you're quiet. 377 00:23:12,120 --> 00:23:14,260 What does the spirit world have to say to him? 378 00:23:14,500 --> 00:23:15,720 Probably owes them money. 379 00:23:17,120 --> 00:23:20,200 Now, Benny was a friend from your childhood, wasn't he? 380 00:23:21,300 --> 00:23:22,300 Sort of. 381 00:23:22,670 --> 00:23:25,170 Well, Benny has a special message for you. 382 00:23:25,710 --> 00:23:26,850 I'm listening. 383 00:23:27,210 --> 00:23:29,750 Benny is your spiritual guide. 384 00:23:29,970 --> 00:23:36,130 He watches over you. And he sees love in your heart. 385 00:23:37,330 --> 00:23:40,250 Who is this love for? 386 00:23:40,950 --> 00:23:41,950 Himself. 387 00:23:44,210 --> 00:23:49,190 I hear the name... What is it, Benny? 388 00:23:49,530 --> 00:23:50,530 Joan? 389 00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:54,840 That's right. 390 00:23:55,860 --> 00:24:01,500 Benny says that deep down, though you may not be aware of it, you are in love 391 00:24:01,500 --> 00:24:02,520 with Jane. 392 00:24:03,260 --> 00:24:10,080 Well, you give Benny 393 00:24:10,080 --> 00:24:11,460 a message from me, will you? 394 00:24:12,000 --> 00:24:14,280 Benny is listening to you now. 395 00:24:15,180 --> 00:24:21,920 Benny, any more crackpot ideas like that, and there'll be no more bone, no 396 00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:22,920 walkie, 397 00:24:23,660 --> 00:24:24,880 Mash up your blinking kennel. 398 00:24:25,740 --> 00:24:27,340 You little dog. 399 00:24:27,860 --> 00:24:30,180 You're like a stupid little mutt. 400 00:24:35,960 --> 00:24:42,960 Well, Benny has obviously been through many lives, the last one being that 401 00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:44,980 unpleasant man's dog. 402 00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:52,060 We can't help everyone, can we? 403 00:24:54,250 --> 00:24:55,330 Hello, Tom. 404 00:24:56,190 --> 00:24:58,570 Maggie's here for you. Do stand up. 405 00:25:00,830 --> 00:25:01,830 What's that, Maggie? 406 00:25:03,970 --> 00:25:05,950 Is that your daughter -in -law, Tom? 407 00:25:07,450 --> 00:25:08,450 Yes. 408 00:25:08,830 --> 00:25:10,870 Maggie says you underestimate her. 409 00:25:11,090 --> 00:25:12,090 That'd be difficult. 410 00:25:13,490 --> 00:25:15,670 Says you should be nicer to her. 411 00:25:16,810 --> 00:25:17,810 What's that, Maggie? 412 00:25:18,330 --> 00:25:19,390 Nicer financially. 413 00:25:21,070 --> 00:25:22,110 Just a minute. 414 00:25:23,850 --> 00:25:26,070 How do I know that's Maggie? 415 00:25:27,150 --> 00:25:32,030 Oh, goodness. I thought we'd already established that. 416 00:25:33,550 --> 00:25:35,530 What do you want Maggie to tell you? 417 00:25:39,370 --> 00:25:42,890 Tell me about our honeymoon, Maggie. 418 00:25:44,670 --> 00:25:45,670 Yes. 419 00:25:47,470 --> 00:25:48,470 Yes. 420 00:25:49,610 --> 00:25:50,610 Mm -hmm. 421 00:25:50,870 --> 00:25:51,870 I'm fine. 422 00:25:53,610 --> 00:25:56,890 Maggie says you went on a long train journey across Europe. 423 00:25:57,610 --> 00:26:00,990 Maggie was arrested in Paris for punching a policeman. 424 00:26:01,990 --> 00:26:02,990 Yes. 425 00:26:03,270 --> 00:26:07,630 And you both got a bit tiddly, and Maggie accidentally stopped the train by 426 00:26:07,630 --> 00:26:10,110 hanging her umbrella on the communication cord. 427 00:26:10,850 --> 00:26:11,850 Yes. 428 00:26:13,070 --> 00:26:18,750 And she hit another policeman in Vienna, and you both got deported. 429 00:26:19,530 --> 00:26:21,070 Is that right, Tom? 430 00:26:28,580 --> 00:26:31,000 Diana, you are without shame. 431 00:26:31,580 --> 00:26:32,580 That's me. 432 00:26:33,460 --> 00:26:36,180 Was that correct, Tom? 433 00:26:36,640 --> 00:26:42,880 No, it isn't. That was my trip with Diana on the Orient Express three months 434 00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:43,880 ago. 435 00:26:45,360 --> 00:26:47,160 Awful, silly woman. 436 00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:48,700 So have I. 437 00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:51,360 Come on. 438 00:26:52,820 --> 00:26:53,820 Let's go. 439 00:26:59,530 --> 00:27:04,990 Oh, and I have a message for a Marianne. You'd better watch out, Marianne, or 440 00:27:04,990 --> 00:27:08,850 you might be run over by a boss and guess who'll be driving it! 441 00:27:12,270 --> 00:27:17,530 I want to say I'm sorry, not just to you, but also to my late wife, Maggie. I 442 00:27:17,530 --> 00:27:21,150 apologise for involving you both in such shabbiness. 443 00:27:21,450 --> 00:27:22,349 It's OK. 444 00:27:22,350 --> 00:27:23,350 Say no more. 445 00:27:25,640 --> 00:27:27,000 Let's just go to bed. 446 00:27:27,200 --> 00:27:28,440 Oh, great. 447 00:27:28,980 --> 00:27:30,320 Separately. It's only Tuesday. 448 00:27:31,720 --> 00:27:32,720 Okay. 449 00:27:33,800 --> 00:27:34,800 Night -night. 450 00:27:34,880 --> 00:27:35,880 Night -night. 451 00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:42,440 Diana, what about your American friend, Hal? 452 00:27:43,680 --> 00:27:45,640 How did she know about him? 453 00:27:45,900 --> 00:27:46,900 Oh, him. 454 00:27:46,940 --> 00:27:52,100 He died two days before she mentioned him. I expect he was just dropping by to 455 00:27:52,100 --> 00:27:53,100 bid me farewell.