1 00:00:13,555 --> 00:00:15,890 [♪ Marcus Latief Scott "Got Me In A Trance"] 2 00:00:33,450 --> 00:00:34,409 [Music stops] 3 00:00:34,576 --> 00:00:38,329 [Woman reporter] It seems like only yesterday the party would go on forever. 4 00:00:38,497 --> 00:00:40,206 But in just 12 short months, 5 00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:43,376 the place known as America's spring break capitol 6 00:00:43,544 --> 00:00:45,878 has become a virtual ghost town. 7 00:00:47,131 --> 00:00:50,007 Who can forget the devastating attack on Lake Victoria 8 00:00:50,175 --> 00:00:53,928 that left scores of young people dead and a community in shock? 9 00:00:54,430 --> 00:00:56,431 And who could have guessed that this hell on earth 10 00:00:56,598 --> 00:00:59,267 would be wrought by a species of piranha 11 00:00:59,435 --> 00:01:02,854 believed extinct for the last two million years? 12 00:01:03,021 --> 00:01:05,940 A massive eradication program has left these waters, 13 00:01:06,108 --> 00:01:10,445 once teeming with life, silent and dead. 14 00:01:10,612 --> 00:01:13,698 After a massive exodus that left most property abandoned, 15 00:01:13,866 --> 00:01:16,576 the local economy fell into ruin. 16 00:01:16,744 --> 00:01:20,246 Lake Victoria is now a quarantine area. 17 00:01:20,414 --> 00:01:25,126 Only weeds grow on the beaches where thousands once soaked up the sun. 18 00:01:25,294 --> 00:01:29,714 And the only boats that remain are dusty relics littering the shoreline. 19 00:01:30,424 --> 00:01:33,551 As we look back on the anniversary of this tragic event, 20 00:01:33,719 --> 00:01:36,220 we're left to wonder if it happened here, 21 00:01:36,388 --> 00:01:37,805 can it happen again? 22 00:01:37,973 --> 00:01:39,474 And if so... 23 00:01:39,641 --> 00:01:41,100 ...where? 24 00:02:43,914 --> 00:02:46,666 [Dog barking in distance] 25 00:03:02,641 --> 00:03:04,392 Sarah! 26 00:03:06,061 --> 00:03:07,228 [Muffled] Sarah! 27 00:03:07,396 --> 00:03:11,232 [Man 2, muffled] Hollering ain't gonna do you a damn bit of good, Clayton. 28 00:03:11,400 --> 00:03:14,485 Yeah. [grunts, groans] 29 00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:18,030 [Sighs] 30 00:03:49,605 --> 00:03:51,606 [Grunts, shouts] 31 00:03:51,773 --> 00:03:54,358 I got my foot stuck in a rut. 32 00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:10,124 There she is, right there. She's dead. 33 00:04:10,292 --> 00:04:14,086 [Grunts] OK. All right. 34 00:04:17,215 --> 00:04:18,007 [Grunts] 35 00:04:21,303 --> 00:04:23,095 That's a big old heifer, ain't it? 36 00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:26,140 Yes, she took second place at County last year. 37 00:04:29,144 --> 00:04:30,728 - [Exclaiming] - Damn it! What the hell? 38 00:04:30,896 --> 00:04:33,564 Shine the light on her belly. Shine the light on the belly. 39 00:04:33,732 --> 00:04:35,441 [Muffled] Something's going on. 40 00:04:40,656 --> 00:04:41,822 [Exhales] 41 00:04:43,408 --> 00:04:45,076 There's something in there. 42 00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:52,208 - [Farting] - [Screams] 43 00:04:53,251 --> 00:04:54,961 Holy flying baby shit! 44 00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:57,588 God damn piece of crap! 45 00:04:57,756 --> 00:04:59,465 I got a lighter. 46 00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:02,176 That smell would knock a buzzard off a gut truck. 47 00:05:08,016 --> 00:05:10,685 - [Farting] - [Screaming] 48 00:05:10,852 --> 00:05:13,521 - Fuck! - That's the gassiest damn cow I ever... 49 00:05:17,192 --> 00:05:18,234 [shouts] 50 00:05:25,617 --> 00:05:28,077 Ow! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! 51 00:05:29,454 --> 00:05:30,663 Whoa! Shit! 52 00:05:32,541 --> 00:05:36,210 - Dang it! - Clayton! 53 00:05:37,379 --> 00:05:39,380 [Screams] Get away! 54 00:05:39,548 --> 00:05:41,215 [Screaming] 55 00:06:02,654 --> 00:06:04,905 [Grunting] 56 00:06:06,408 --> 00:06:07,742 Aah! 57 00:06:09,244 --> 00:06:11,787 - [Growling] - [Crunches] 58 00:06:11,955 --> 00:06:13,080 [Spits] 59 00:06:24,259 --> 00:06:26,385 [♪ Twirl: "Summer School"] 60 00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:33,434 Hey! It's time to get wet again! 61 00:06:33,602 --> 00:06:35,519 - Woo! - Come on down! 62 00:06:35,687 --> 00:06:38,022 Our lifeguards are hot, single, 63 00:06:38,190 --> 00:06:40,691 and ready to party with someone like you! 64 00:06:40,859 --> 00:06:42,860 - You! - Wet 'em down, boys. 65 00:06:43,028 --> 00:06:43,944 [Cheering] 66 00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:47,948 So if you wanna cool off, come on down to the hottest hole in town. 67 00:06:48,116 --> 00:06:50,910 - Three words for you... - [all] The Big Wet! 68 00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:54,246 Remember, double D swims free! 69 00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:02,254 Oh, boy. Hold on, cut it, cut it. Cut it. 70 00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:03,380 - [Music stops] - [Man] Cut. 71 00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:06,425 [Women chattering, laughing] 72 00:07:11,098 --> 00:07:13,682 - [Woman] Hey. - Hi! 73 00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:15,976 I gotta cut somethin' off at the pass. 74 00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:18,813 Here you go. Keep 'em wet. 75 00:07:18,980 --> 00:07:20,689 And are you guys friends of someone...? 76 00:07:20,857 --> 00:07:22,983 Maddy. 77 00:07:23,151 --> 00:07:25,319 Get over here and give your stepdad a hug. 78 00:07:25,487 --> 00:07:28,030 Chet, tell me you did not fire our old lifeguards 79 00:07:28,198 --> 00:07:30,991 and replace them with... strippers. 80 00:07:31,159 --> 00:07:34,161 - Water-certified strippers. - Really? 81 00:07:34,329 --> 00:07:35,830 - More than that, pumpkin. - Unbelievable. 82 00:07:35,997 --> 00:07:38,374 Listen. Before your sweet mama died, God rest her soul, 83 00:07:38,542 --> 00:07:41,210 she made me promise her to keep this water park running, 84 00:07:41,378 --> 00:07:44,880 and I am just gonna make sure that I provide for you as well as she did. 85 00:07:45,048 --> 00:07:48,843 I'm your daddy now. We're so lucky to have each other. 86 00:07:49,803 --> 00:07:50,845 Wow, Chet. 87 00:07:51,012 --> 00:07:53,556 Sometimes I think you really believe what's coming out of your mouth. 88 00:07:53,723 --> 00:07:56,642 Come here, doll. You are gonna love this. 89 00:07:56,810 --> 00:07:58,519 [♪ The One and Only's: "Chemical Kings"] 90 00:07:58,687 --> 00:08:00,020 [Maddy] "Adult Pool"? 91 00:08:00,188 --> 00:08:01,981 [Chet] Go ahead. 92 00:08:04,693 --> 00:08:07,528 We are gonna make bank on this! 93 00:08:12,993 --> 00:08:14,243 What do you think? 94 00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:16,412 I think this is a very expensive joke. 95 00:08:16,580 --> 00:08:18,747 [Chet] The world's first strip bar at a water park? 96 00:08:18,915 --> 00:08:21,500 That's a stroke of genius. Franchising, baby. 97 00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:24,378 - No, no, no, no. - Oh, don't worry about that. 98 00:08:24,546 --> 00:08:26,172 You just throw a little extra chlorine 99 00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:28,757 and sulfuric acid in the pool, sanitizes everything. 100 00:08:28,925 --> 00:08:31,886 Hey, Kiki, why don't you get your shapely ass out of the pool. 101 00:08:32,053 --> 00:08:34,388 [Speaking foreign language] 102 00:08:34,556 --> 00:08:37,558 Russian. Huh? She's a doctor. 103 00:08:37,726 --> 00:08:40,186 Now keep your eyes over there on the flat screen TV. 104 00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:43,397 I call this the "Cooch Cam," but I'm open to suggestions. 105 00:08:43,565 --> 00:08:45,524 Check it out. Oh... 106 00:08:48,278 --> 00:08:50,863 - That's disgusting. Absolutely not. - Do not touch it. 107 00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:53,073 - I'm getting rid of it. - Don't you touch it! 108 00:08:53,241 --> 00:08:54,783 That's not your call. 109 00:08:54,951 --> 00:08:57,411 Don't you forget that I'm still half owner of this place. 110 00:08:57,579 --> 00:09:02,082 Oh, is that right? Raise your hand if you own 51 percent 111 00:09:02,250 --> 00:09:05,419 of this water park. [Pops lips] 112 00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:09,423 Now raise your hand if you're a 49 percent minority owner. 113 00:09:09,591 --> 00:09:10,591 That's you. 114 00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:25,272 [Fireworks whistling, popping] 115 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:28,776 [♪ All The Right Moves: "The lmpatient, The lmperfect, The lmpossible"] 116 00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:36,492 [Whooping, laughing] 117 00:09:41,164 --> 00:09:43,332 - Hey! Hi, ladies. - Hi, Maddy. 118 00:09:43,500 --> 00:09:46,627 - Hey, Maddy. - How are you? What's new? 119 00:09:46,795 --> 00:09:50,256 Well, this is the summer Shelby finally abstains from abstinence. 120 00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:52,007 - Ah! - Shut up! [chuckles] 121 00:09:52,175 --> 00:09:53,467 She's afraid to have sex 122 00:09:53,635 --> 00:09:56,637 because her slutty cousin gave birth to a flipper baby. 123 00:09:56,805 --> 00:09:58,681 Stop it! You're not supposed to say that. 124 00:09:58,848 --> 00:10:01,850 - That didn't happen. - Ooh, here he comes. 125 00:10:02,018 --> 00:10:03,686 The boy who's gonna pop her cherry. 126 00:10:03,853 --> 00:10:07,273 - He just doesn't know it yet. - [Both giggling] 127 00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:11,652 Hey, Maddy. What do you think of all the new changes around here? 128 00:10:11,820 --> 00:10:13,362 - Josh, meet me at the lake. - Hi. 129 00:10:13,530 --> 00:10:16,156 - Come on. [giggling] - All right. See ya. Cool. 130 00:10:16,908 --> 00:10:18,367 What, am I the last guy to know you're back? 131 00:10:18,535 --> 00:10:19,827 - Hi! - Hey there! 132 00:10:19,995 --> 00:10:21,954 - How are you? I missed you. - Oh, me too. 133 00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:24,164 Bet you wish you were still in grad school for the summer, huh? 134 00:10:24,332 --> 00:10:26,583 - I can't believe what Chet's done. - I know. 135 00:10:26,751 --> 00:10:27,876 [Chuckles] 136 00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:29,670 This place is everything to me. 137 00:10:29,838 --> 00:10:31,672 Working here, hanging out. 138 00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:35,009 I know. I miss those moments, too. So, look, now that you're back... 139 00:10:35,176 --> 00:10:37,386 Hey, you guys, are you sure that's such a good idea? 140 00:10:37,554 --> 00:10:40,431 - [Exploding, whistling] - Ho! 141 00:10:40,598 --> 00:10:43,642 - [Explosion, splashing] - Whoa! 142 00:10:43,810 --> 00:10:46,020 There better not be any underage drinking going on here. 143 00:10:46,187 --> 00:10:51,692 - Hello, Kyle. - Hey, come on, man. I'm on duty. 144 00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:53,193 I can't be drinking. 145 00:10:53,361 --> 00:10:56,530 We got fireworks, indecent exposure... 146 00:10:56,698 --> 00:10:59,033 - [man coughing] - [Kyle]... probable drugs. 147 00:11:02,412 --> 00:11:05,706 Definite drugs. [exhales] 148 00:11:05,874 --> 00:11:07,291 I may just have to write you up. 149 00:11:07,459 --> 00:11:09,543 - Hi, Kyle. - [Chuckling] 150 00:11:13,715 --> 00:11:14,923 [Groaning] 151 00:11:15,091 --> 00:11:16,550 I don't see what he has that I don't have. 152 00:11:16,718 --> 00:11:19,219 Six inches and a badge. [laughing] 153 00:11:19,387 --> 00:11:21,889 I heard you were back in town, 154 00:11:22,057 --> 00:11:24,266 so I figured I'd stop by and say hey. 155 00:11:24,434 --> 00:11:27,269 And I also feel like I should 156 00:11:27,437 --> 00:11:29,563 say something about the last time we talked. 157 00:11:29,731 --> 00:11:33,025 No, you don't have to. Long-distance relationships, they're weird. 158 00:11:33,193 --> 00:11:35,569 - But you're back now. - For the summer. 159 00:11:35,737 --> 00:11:37,571 Should be an interesting summer. 160 00:11:39,866 --> 00:11:41,700 I... I... 161 00:11:41,868 --> 00:11:44,078 - I'm still on duty, so... - OK. 162 00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:45,120 Welcome back. 163 00:11:50,377 --> 00:11:51,752 [Shelby] I had fun at the party tonight. 164 00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:53,587 [Josh] Yeah, yeah. Me too. 165 00:11:56,091 --> 00:11:57,424 I love the water. 166 00:11:57,592 --> 00:11:58,926 It's, uh, really... 167 00:12:00,428 --> 00:12:01,428 ...wet. 168 00:12:07,352 --> 00:12:08,769 What are you thinking about? 169 00:12:11,272 --> 00:12:13,107 - Nothin' much. - [Chuckles] 170 00:12:13,274 --> 00:12:16,318 Hey, let's take off all our clothes and go swimming. 171 00:12:16,486 --> 00:12:17,778 Uh... 172 00:12:19,155 --> 00:12:21,073 OK, cool. Sure. Yeah, all right. 173 00:12:26,121 --> 00:12:29,289 - Turn around. - Oh, right. Sorry. 174 00:12:38,591 --> 00:12:39,925 [Splashes] 175 00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:50,978 Shelby? 176 00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:53,772 Shelby! 177 00:12:55,942 --> 00:12:58,026 - You coming in or what? - Yeah, I'm coming. 178 00:13:03,074 --> 00:13:04,992 No funny stuff, OK? 179 00:13:16,337 --> 00:13:17,546 All right. 180 00:13:17,714 --> 00:13:19,840 [Laughing, chattering] 181 00:13:20,008 --> 00:13:21,842 You want some of this? You want some, huh? 182 00:13:22,010 --> 00:13:23,343 You're not supposed to splash me back! 183 00:13:23,511 --> 00:13:25,512 [Muffled chattering continues] 184 00:13:28,933 --> 00:13:30,976 [Laughing, panting] 185 00:13:36,149 --> 00:13:37,816 [Gasps] 186 00:13:37,984 --> 00:13:40,027 - What? - I just felt something against me. 187 00:13:40,195 --> 00:13:41,653 [Chuckles] 188 00:13:41,821 --> 00:13:44,823 - Is that you? - What? What are you talking about? 189 00:13:52,081 --> 00:13:55,000 Ow! What are you...? What are you doing? 190 00:13:55,168 --> 00:13:57,211 - I didn't... - Well, whatever it is, I don't like it! 191 00:13:57,378 --> 00:13:59,213 I didn't do anything. 192 00:14:01,925 --> 00:14:03,050 Shelby, where are you going? 193 00:14:03,218 --> 00:14:05,052 I'm cold. I'm getting out. 194 00:14:14,229 --> 00:14:15,395 [♪ The Limousines: "Very Busy People"] 195 00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:18,565 - [Woman] Wait. You have to do it. - [Man] OK, fine. 196 00:14:18,733 --> 00:14:21,902 - OK. - [Panting] 197 00:14:22,070 --> 00:14:23,737 Dear Lord. 198 00:14:25,907 --> 00:14:29,576 - Come on. - OK. Dear Lord. 199 00:14:29,744 --> 00:14:32,746 Please forgive us for what we are about to do. 200 00:14:32,914 --> 00:14:36,750 We each know that having relations before marriage is a sin, 201 00:14:36,918 --> 00:14:38,252 but... 202 00:14:39,587 --> 00:14:42,881 ...we know that we will be forgiven... 203 00:14:43,049 --> 00:14:45,425 ...for it because... 204 00:14:45,593 --> 00:14:48,053 ...we're praying about it. 205 00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:50,430 - Amen. - Amen. 206 00:14:51,975 --> 00:14:54,601 - You can fuck me now. - Amen! 207 00:14:54,769 --> 00:14:59,147 Oh, look at this. [chuckles] 208 00:14:59,315 --> 00:15:01,817 - Do you like that? - [Exhales] 209 00:15:01,985 --> 00:15:04,278 [Chuckles] Aw... 210 00:15:06,447 --> 00:15:08,240 Mine. 211 00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:10,117 Ah. [chuckles] 212 00:15:10,285 --> 00:15:11,827 Don't make me cuff the other one. 213 00:15:15,290 --> 00:15:17,291 [Brake releasing] 214 00:15:22,213 --> 00:15:23,630 We're moving, Travis. 215 00:15:23,798 --> 00:15:25,632 - I know, I know. - No! 216 00:15:28,970 --> 00:15:30,470 Look, you idiot! 217 00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:35,475 [Both grunting] 218 00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:37,019 [Ashley groans] 219 00:15:37,186 --> 00:15:39,021 - Ashley! You OK? - Yeah. 220 00:15:39,188 --> 00:15:41,356 Water's coming in. Shit! 221 00:15:43,109 --> 00:15:44,818 Give me the key for the cuff! 222 00:15:44,986 --> 00:15:47,821 - Uh, it must've fallen out. - Find it! Now! 223 00:15:47,989 --> 00:15:49,990 - [Ashley] Where is it?! - [Travis grunts] 224 00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:52,826 [Ashley] Shit, shit, shit, shit. Shit. Damn it! 225 00:15:57,498 --> 00:15:59,166 Where's the key for the damn cuff?! 226 00:15:59,334 --> 00:16:01,043 - I should go for help. - No! 227 00:16:01,210 --> 00:16:03,670 - I can't see anything! I'm sorry! - Ashley! 228 00:16:03,838 --> 00:16:05,380 Hit the dome light and keep looking. 229 00:16:08,176 --> 00:16:09,217 Shit! 230 00:16:10,553 --> 00:16:12,679 What are you doing?! Get over here! 231 00:16:12,847 --> 00:16:14,681 - Ashley! - I'm gonna go for help! 232 00:16:14,849 --> 00:16:17,809 Get back here! What are you doing?! 233 00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:20,646 Ashley! Damn! 234 00:16:24,651 --> 00:16:26,985 [Travis screaming] 235 00:16:32,784 --> 00:16:36,244 - [Screaming continues] - Travis? 236 00:16:36,412 --> 00:16:37,871 [Growls] 237 00:16:38,039 --> 00:16:39,414 Travis? 238 00:16:39,582 --> 00:16:41,541 - Travis! - [Screaming] 239 00:16:44,128 --> 00:16:46,004 Ow! [grunts] 240 00:16:46,172 --> 00:16:49,549 - There's something in the water! - [Hissing] 241 00:16:49,717 --> 00:16:51,593 Help! 242 00:16:51,761 --> 00:16:54,388 Anybody! [sobbing] 243 00:16:55,682 --> 00:16:58,809 Somebody help me! Ashley! 244 00:16:58,976 --> 00:17:02,604 [Screaming] 245 00:17:05,233 --> 00:17:08,026 Travis? Come on, are you there? 246 00:17:08,194 --> 00:17:09,903 Travis? [panting] 247 00:17:10,071 --> 00:17:11,780 Travis! 248 00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:17,494 - Ashley! - [Shrieks] Oh, my... Oh, my God. 249 00:17:17,662 --> 00:17:21,707 Oh, my... Help! Oh, my God! 250 00:17:21,874 --> 00:17:25,252 Please! Is anybody out there? 251 00:17:25,420 --> 00:17:28,255 [Echoing] Anybody?! 252 00:17:28,423 --> 00:17:29,715 I'm sorry. I just... 253 00:17:29,882 --> 00:17:32,384 No, it's cool. I don't mind hanging out. 254 00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:34,594 No, it's not you. It's just that... 255 00:17:35,972 --> 00:17:38,890 Do you think Ashley's prettier than me? 256 00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:41,435 - No. - Most guys do. 257 00:17:41,602 --> 00:17:44,146 Yeah, well, I've never really been into girls with big breasts. 258 00:17:44,313 --> 00:17:46,440 Aw. [chuckles] 259 00:18:17,430 --> 00:18:18,805 [Door opens] 260 00:18:27,648 --> 00:18:29,691 Welcome back, Maddy. 261 00:18:41,162 --> 00:18:43,330 [Growling] 262 00:18:44,499 --> 00:18:46,666 [♪ Cellphish: "Before I Die"] 263 00:18:51,881 --> 00:18:54,299 [Screaming, cheering] 264 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:31,044 [Man grunting, laughing] 265 00:19:31,212 --> 00:19:33,004 - Dave? - [Laughing, indistinct] 266 00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:34,381 What the fuck you doing? 267 00:19:34,549 --> 00:19:37,926 The hole where the water comes out. [Grunts] 268 00:19:38,094 --> 00:19:40,720 - Oh, God, man. - She's so wet! 269 00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:43,223 [Groans] 270 00:19:46,227 --> 00:19:48,603 Hey, Shelby, have you seen Ashley or Travis? 271 00:19:48,771 --> 00:19:50,355 Neither one of them punched in this morning. 272 00:19:50,523 --> 00:19:52,274 No, I haven't seen either of them. 273 00:19:53,067 --> 00:19:54,276 I don't know. 274 00:19:54,443 --> 00:19:56,862 Just a sec. 275 00:19:57,029 --> 00:20:00,615 - You OK? - I just feel a little weird. It's OK. 276 00:20:00,783 --> 00:20:03,743 - Here, let me help you. - No, no, I'm fine. Really. 277 00:20:10,293 --> 00:20:12,460 - [Gasping, coughing] - You OK? 278 00:20:12,628 --> 00:20:16,548 Whoa! Look who has morning sickness! 279 00:20:16,716 --> 00:20:19,718 [Chuckling] 280 00:20:19,886 --> 00:20:21,636 Nice work, papa. 281 00:21:03,346 --> 00:21:06,973 [Kyle] Nobody was inside, Shel. I'm sure they're fine. 282 00:21:07,141 --> 00:21:11,311 Probably just shaken up and scared they're gonna get in trouble. 283 00:21:12,939 --> 00:21:16,650 - Oh, my God. Come on, Ash. Pick up! - [Line ringing] 284 00:21:16,817 --> 00:21:20,195 - Hey, it's Ash. Leave a message. - Shit! Call me! 285 00:21:20,363 --> 00:21:22,364 Is there... Is there anywhere else they might've gone or...? 286 00:21:22,531 --> 00:21:25,033 No, I don't... I'm just... I'm just gonna go. 287 00:22:03,572 --> 00:22:04,572 [Sniffles] 288 00:22:06,701 --> 00:22:08,535 Ashley's my best friend. 289 00:22:08,703 --> 00:22:11,538 I mean... I know she's kind of a slut, 290 00:22:11,706 --> 00:22:15,083 and she's stolen 11 of my ex-boyfriends and... 291 00:22:15,251 --> 00:22:16,751 [growls] 292 00:22:16,919 --> 00:22:19,045 ...I'm pretty sure she also stole a pair of earrings 293 00:22:19,213 --> 00:22:21,715 that my grandmother gave me before she died, but... 294 00:22:21,882 --> 00:22:23,675 ...we were like sisters. 295 00:22:27,555 --> 00:22:28,763 [Gasps] 296 00:22:31,017 --> 00:22:32,183 What is that? 297 00:22:33,436 --> 00:22:34,561 [Boards thumping] 298 00:22:34,729 --> 00:22:35,729 Oh, my God. 299 00:22:35,896 --> 00:22:38,440 We have to get off of this thing right now. Hurry! 300 00:22:40,067 --> 00:22:41,401 Come on, Shelby! 301 00:22:42,403 --> 00:22:44,237 [Screaming] 302 00:22:51,078 --> 00:22:51,995 [Growling] 303 00:22:52,163 --> 00:22:53,621 - Get out! Come on! - [Shelby whimpering] 304 00:22:53,789 --> 00:22:55,540 - Shelby, grab my hand! - [Growling] 305 00:22:58,294 --> 00:22:59,419 Quick, come on, I've got you! 306 00:23:00,796 --> 00:23:02,422 - [Shrieks] - Hurry, come on. Let's go! 307 00:23:03,799 --> 00:23:05,133 [Screaming] 308 00:23:07,928 --> 00:23:09,262 Come on! Quickly! 309 00:23:12,391 --> 00:23:13,767 Let's go! We're almost there! 310 00:23:14,935 --> 00:23:16,936 [Shrieking] 311 00:23:19,815 --> 00:23:21,608 - [Shrieking] - Careful! 312 00:23:28,157 --> 00:23:29,324 [Screaming] 313 00:23:29,492 --> 00:23:31,409 No, no, no! Come back, Shelby! 314 00:23:31,577 --> 00:23:34,329 - [Whimpering] - Come here! Come this way, quick! 315 00:23:34,497 --> 00:23:35,663 You're gonna have to jump! 316 00:23:40,544 --> 00:23:43,797 - Come on, you're gonna have to jump. - Maddy, I can't jump from here! 317 00:23:43,964 --> 00:23:47,342 - Let's go! - [Shelby screaming indistinctly] 318 00:23:48,803 --> 00:23:50,303 Come on, it's just a foot! 319 00:23:53,140 --> 00:23:55,350 - Grab my hand! I got you! - [Shrieks] 320 00:23:58,145 --> 00:24:00,021 [Both screaming] 321 00:24:12,701 --> 00:24:15,036 [Both grunting, panting] 322 00:24:17,206 --> 00:24:20,125 [Both screaming] 323 00:24:30,678 --> 00:24:32,512 [Both shrieking] 324 00:24:33,848 --> 00:24:35,140 [Gasps] 325 00:24:35,307 --> 00:24:36,683 What is this thing? 326 00:24:36,851 --> 00:24:38,560 Maddy? 327 00:24:38,727 --> 00:24:40,186 What the fuck is that? 328 00:24:47,069 --> 00:24:48,069 Ugh. 329 00:24:49,655 --> 00:24:51,656 [Panting slowly] 330 00:24:54,493 --> 00:24:55,827 - [Growls] - [Screams] 331 00:24:55,995 --> 00:24:57,537 - Fuck. Oh, shit. - [Shelby] Oh, my God! 332 00:25:03,169 --> 00:25:04,878 Is that a fucking piranha? 333 00:25:05,212 --> 00:25:09,924 My father worked construction on Carson Dam. 334 00:25:10,092 --> 00:25:14,387 They found fossils like this when they first broke ground. 335 00:25:14,555 --> 00:25:16,764 He gave me this one for my eighth birthday. 336 00:25:16,932 --> 00:25:18,558 I'm telling you, man, it was a piranha. 337 00:25:18,726 --> 00:25:20,935 How'd they get from Lake Victoria to our lake? 338 00:25:21,103 --> 00:25:22,896 That's what we've gotta find out. 339 00:25:24,064 --> 00:25:27,400 - [Chuckling] - What? 340 00:25:30,070 --> 00:25:31,905 Look at us. 341 00:25:32,072 --> 00:25:34,073 The cop and the marine biologist. 342 00:25:34,742 --> 00:25:37,202 I'm sorry. That just sounds like a shitty sitcom. 343 00:25:37,369 --> 00:25:40,705 - The Cop and The Marine Biologist. - [Clicks on siren] 344 00:25:42,583 --> 00:25:43,625 [Siren stops] 345 00:25:46,086 --> 00:25:47,545 You're still wet. 346 00:25:49,590 --> 00:25:50,924 A little, yeah. 347 00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:55,428 [Indistinct police radio chatter] 348 00:25:55,596 --> 00:25:57,597 [Engine races] 349 00:26:18,285 --> 00:26:20,995 [Car approaches, slows] 350 00:26:28,337 --> 00:26:30,630 Guys, can one of you open the door? 351 00:26:30,798 --> 00:26:33,174 Kyle, open the door. 352 00:26:33,342 --> 00:26:34,801 Little man. 353 00:26:36,095 --> 00:26:37,971 That's funny. 354 00:26:38,138 --> 00:26:39,180 Dick. 355 00:26:41,684 --> 00:26:43,226 [Gasps] 356 00:26:46,105 --> 00:26:48,147 Who are you? Why are you here? 357 00:26:48,315 --> 00:26:54,320 - Sir, we saw you on YouTube. - You and 11 million, 486 other people. 358 00:26:54,697 --> 00:26:57,282 I have 700 more hits 359 00:26:57,449 --> 00:26:59,492 than the Laughing Diarrhea Baby. 360 00:26:59,660 --> 00:27:02,287 Uh, we need your expertise, Mr. Goodman. 361 00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:06,207 Why? 362 00:27:07,376 --> 00:27:09,127 We think they're back. 363 00:27:15,968 --> 00:27:19,554 Cross Lake isn't even connected to Lake Victoria. 364 00:27:19,722 --> 00:27:24,517 The piranha must be migrating through underground lakes and rivers. 365 00:27:24,685 --> 00:27:28,563 I've studied this specimen for almost a year. 366 00:27:30,024 --> 00:27:32,025 - [Tank thumps] - [Laughs wildly] 367 00:27:32,192 --> 00:27:33,609 Here, Meanie. 368 00:27:33,777 --> 00:27:36,696 [Speaking gibberish] 369 00:27:36,864 --> 00:27:38,823 - [Tapping tank] - [Growls] 370 00:27:38,991 --> 00:27:41,326 I think you might find this interesting. 371 00:27:42,745 --> 00:27:45,413 - You need some help? - Yeah. [grunting] 372 00:27:45,581 --> 00:27:49,375 OK, this is galvanized steel, 373 00:27:49,543 --> 00:27:53,504 like ordinary household plumbing. 374 00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:56,382 There we go. 375 00:27:56,550 --> 00:27:59,052 Aha! Now, for some incentive. 376 00:28:01,388 --> 00:28:02,597 - [Frog croaking] - Yeah, yeah, yeah... 377 00:28:02,765 --> 00:28:05,058 No, no, no, not the frog. Aah! 378 00:28:05,225 --> 00:28:08,186 Sorry, I... sold out of puppies this morning. 379 00:28:08,896 --> 00:28:10,772 OK... 380 00:28:11,732 --> 00:28:16,277 Now, I think this is quite resourceful. Watch. 381 00:28:17,905 --> 00:28:18,946 - [Thumps] - [Gasps] 382 00:28:26,080 --> 00:28:27,413 Come on, come on, come on. 383 00:28:41,178 --> 00:28:43,554 Now it's got something to grab. 384 00:28:53,399 --> 00:28:54,774 - [Grunts] - Oh, dear! Fuck! 385 00:28:54,942 --> 00:28:57,110 Barry, are you crazy?! You almost lost a hand! 386 00:28:57,277 --> 00:28:58,945 I had a pet frog once. 387 00:28:59,113 --> 00:29:00,238 [Sighs] 388 00:29:01,281 --> 00:29:03,699 Come on. OK. Come here. 389 00:29:03,867 --> 00:29:05,076 Really? 390 00:29:06,120 --> 00:29:08,871 Now check out some data. 391 00:29:09,039 --> 00:29:10,123 What were you thinking? 392 00:29:17,673 --> 00:29:20,633 These piranha spent eons 393 00:29:20,801 --> 00:29:24,512 living in underground lakes and rivers 394 00:29:24,680 --> 00:29:30,268 full of sulfur dioxide from all the geothermal activity. 395 00:29:30,436 --> 00:29:33,604 That's how they come back to spawn. 396 00:29:33,772 --> 00:29:35,982 - They follow the rotten egg smell. - Yes. 397 00:29:37,693 --> 00:29:42,530 Problem is, sulfur dioxide is commonly released 398 00:29:42,698 --> 00:29:45,491 during the treatment of chlorinated water. 399 00:29:45,659 --> 00:29:49,704 So it's conceivable that the fish could become... 400 00:29:49,872 --> 00:29:51,789 ...confused... 401 00:29:51,957 --> 00:29:55,209 ...and try to enter man-made drainage systems. 402 00:29:55,794 --> 00:29:59,005 Especially with all the shocking 403 00:29:59,173 --> 00:30:01,841 abundance of backyard pools. 404 00:30:04,595 --> 00:30:06,721 Our water park drains directly into Cross Lake. 405 00:30:06,889 --> 00:30:09,015 That's like the equivalent of a thousand swimming pools. 406 00:30:09,183 --> 00:30:11,684 Oh, that would be a very bad thing. 407 00:30:11,852 --> 00:30:14,353 Did you tell anyone that this could happen? 408 00:30:14,521 --> 00:30:18,191 I tried. Unfortunately, I lost some credibility 409 00:30:18,358 --> 00:30:23,696 after my last book foretold a dreadful plague of walking fish. 410 00:30:23,864 --> 00:30:25,531 Oh, that's right! 411 00:30:25,699 --> 00:30:28,034 You wrote Fish Walk Among Us. I loved that book. 412 00:30:28,911 --> 00:30:30,703 That's really great. 413 00:30:30,871 --> 00:30:32,580 Why, thank you... 414 00:30:32,748 --> 00:30:35,208 ...kindred spirit. 415 00:30:36,043 --> 00:30:37,376 Mm-hm. 416 00:30:37,544 --> 00:30:39,045 [Chuckles] 417 00:30:39,213 --> 00:30:41,422 [Goodman mutters indistinctly] 418 00:30:43,217 --> 00:30:45,718 [Laughs] Thanks. 419 00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:49,889 Barry... you, uh... 420 00:30:50,599 --> 00:30:52,391 You read a marine biology book? 421 00:30:52,559 --> 00:30:54,268 Well, I wanted to see what you're so interested in. 422 00:30:55,604 --> 00:30:57,355 [Sighs] 423 00:30:59,233 --> 00:31:02,818 Guys, we've gotta check the drains over the outflow pipes in the lake, tonight. 424 00:31:02,986 --> 00:31:05,154 I could get a dive team up here from Tempe by tomorrow. 425 00:31:05,322 --> 00:31:06,489 No, that's too late. 426 00:31:06,657 --> 00:31:10,326 The water park opens tomorrow, that place is gonna be packed. 427 00:31:10,494 --> 00:31:12,078 If the fish are getting through the drain system... 428 00:31:12,246 --> 00:31:16,165 That would make Lake Victoria look like an appetizer. 429 00:31:16,917 --> 00:31:19,043 Guys, we've gotta get out there right now. 430 00:31:19,962 --> 00:31:21,712 Thank you so much for your help, Mr. Goodman. 431 00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:23,339 Thank you. Thank you. 432 00:31:23,507 --> 00:31:24,715 [Barry] Thank you, sir. Honor. 433 00:31:24,883 --> 00:31:27,426 - OK. Be well. - It's a pleasure... 434 00:31:30,556 --> 00:31:35,101 - Aha! 11 million, 888 hits! - [Door closes] 435 00:31:35,269 --> 00:31:39,313 Take that, Laughing Diarrhea Baby! 436 00:32:02,462 --> 00:32:03,796 [Growls] 437 00:32:05,966 --> 00:32:08,634 [Man] Two Merkin teens, Ashley Sorby and Travis Mitchell, 438 00:32:08,802 --> 00:32:10,303 were reported missing this morning 439 00:32:10,470 --> 00:32:13,472 after their van was pulled out of Cross Lake. 440 00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:15,641 Thanks for letting me stay here. 441 00:32:15,809 --> 00:32:17,143 It's totally cool. 442 00:32:18,145 --> 00:32:19,312 How you feeling? 443 00:32:20,147 --> 00:32:22,023 - A little better. - You don't seem any better. 444 00:32:23,483 --> 00:32:25,318 - [Sobs] - Hey, what is it? 445 00:32:25,485 --> 00:32:28,362 It's just the stress of the whole Ashley thing and... 446 00:32:33,327 --> 00:32:34,994 Make love to me. 447 00:32:36,997 --> 00:32:39,832 - Please. - Right now? 448 00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:41,459 Please, Josh. 449 00:32:41,627 --> 00:32:43,836 Right now. I... 450 00:32:44,004 --> 00:32:45,713 I think something's really wrong with me, 451 00:32:45,881 --> 00:32:48,007 and I... if I don't... 452 00:32:48,175 --> 00:32:50,968 If I don't get better, I don't want to die a virgin. 453 00:32:52,846 --> 00:32:55,348 [Panting] Please, Josh. 454 00:32:55,515 --> 00:32:57,350 I want it to be with you. 455 00:33:02,814 --> 00:33:05,024 Just come inside me. 456 00:33:05,192 --> 00:33:07,360 Come inside me, I'll do whatever you say after that. 457 00:33:10,572 --> 00:33:12,907 The outflow pipes down there link directly to the water park. 458 00:33:13,075 --> 00:33:13,866 I've gotta check them out. 459 00:33:14,034 --> 00:33:16,535 You've considered how batshit crazy this is, right? 460 00:33:16,703 --> 00:33:18,954 I've gotta take a look. I'll be quick. 461 00:33:19,539 --> 00:33:22,583 Um, look, about what I was trying to say last night... 462 00:33:22,751 --> 00:33:24,543 Are you coming in? Because I could really use a spotter. 463 00:33:24,711 --> 00:33:27,588 - What? - I mean, if you're... It's OK. 464 00:33:27,756 --> 00:33:31,008 No, no, no, I'm not scared. It's just, um... 465 00:33:31,176 --> 00:33:33,010 ...I can't swim. [nervous chuckle] 466 00:33:33,178 --> 00:33:35,221 You work at a water park and you can't swim? 467 00:33:35,389 --> 00:33:37,056 Ding-ding. 468 00:33:37,224 --> 00:33:38,808 What about all the beach parties in high school, 469 00:33:38,975 --> 00:33:42,436 or the parties at the park? You never...? 470 00:33:42,604 --> 00:33:44,939 My God, Barry, I totally would've taught you how to swim. 471 00:33:45,107 --> 00:33:47,692 No, yeah, I know. You seemed kind of busy at the time. 472 00:33:48,944 --> 00:33:51,070 Not a big deal. 473 00:33:51,863 --> 00:33:53,406 Toss me that flashlight. 474 00:33:55,075 --> 00:33:59,078 [Kyle, quietly] Yes, I know. That's what I said, Chet, but she won't listen. 475 00:33:59,246 --> 00:34:00,913 All right, I'll find you. 476 00:34:07,045 --> 00:34:09,714 Are you sure you wanna do this? 477 00:34:09,881 --> 00:34:11,048 [Whispers] No. 478 00:34:42,789 --> 00:34:44,540 [Grate rattles] 479 00:34:50,297 --> 00:34:53,841 You, uh, let her go in there alone? 480 00:34:54,843 --> 00:34:56,135 Fuck off, Kyle. 481 00:34:56,303 --> 00:34:59,305 Oh, yes, Barry can't swim. 482 00:35:13,987 --> 00:35:16,155 [Growls] 483 00:35:21,203 --> 00:35:23,496 - Maddy! - [Screaming] 484 00:35:23,663 --> 00:35:24,371 - Maddy! - Maddy! 485 00:35:26,541 --> 00:35:28,167 [Barry] Swim, Maddy! 486 00:35:29,920 --> 00:35:31,337 [Screams] 487 00:35:43,975 --> 00:35:46,060 - Shit. - Get out of the way! Get back! 488 00:35:54,903 --> 00:35:57,363 - Are you OK? - I think so. 489 00:36:04,037 --> 00:36:06,705 [♪ The Limousines: "Flaskaboozendancingshoes"] 490 00:36:06,873 --> 00:36:09,750 Don't worry. I won't break. 491 00:36:12,254 --> 00:36:13,504 - [Gasps] - I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 492 00:36:13,672 --> 00:36:15,881 No, it's OK, it's OK. I like it. 493 00:36:16,049 --> 00:36:17,424 Go on. 494 00:36:17,592 --> 00:36:18,884 [Sighs] 495 00:36:20,220 --> 00:36:23,722 - Oh, God, Shelby. - Fuck me. [exhales] 496 00:36:26,226 --> 00:36:29,270 - Aah... - Oh, my God. Yes! 497 00:36:29,437 --> 00:36:31,063 - Oh, God. - Oh, God, Shelby. 498 00:36:31,231 --> 00:36:33,607 No, something's not right. No, please! 499 00:36:33,775 --> 00:36:36,151 No, something's wrong, something's wrong! 500 00:36:36,319 --> 00:36:37,444 [Josh] Oh, my God. 501 00:36:37,612 --> 00:36:40,573 - [Both screaming] - No, something's wrong! 502 00:36:40,740 --> 00:36:42,741 Almost there! Almost there! 503 00:36:42,909 --> 00:36:44,952 [Flesh ripping] 504 00:36:46,204 --> 00:36:48,414 - What the fuck? - [Gagging] 505 00:36:48,582 --> 00:36:50,249 What the fuck is on my dick?! 506 00:36:51,334 --> 00:36:52,459 Oh, my... 507 00:36:52,627 --> 00:36:54,295 Oh! Oh, my God! 508 00:36:55,755 --> 00:36:59,258 What the fuck?! Oh, my God! 509 00:36:59,426 --> 00:37:01,927 - Oh, shit! - [Glass breaking] 510 00:37:02,095 --> 00:37:04,763 [Panting, screaming continues] 511 00:37:13,815 --> 00:37:17,026 Oh, fuck. Oh, Jesus Christ. 512 00:37:18,111 --> 00:37:20,321 [Growling] 513 00:37:22,157 --> 00:37:23,282 [Screaming] 514 00:37:23,450 --> 00:37:26,076 - [Slicing] - Oh, Jesus! 515 00:37:26,244 --> 00:37:28,495 [Screaming] 516 00:37:29,623 --> 00:37:30,748 [Knife clatters] 517 00:37:30,916 --> 00:37:32,875 [Body thuds] 518 00:37:34,127 --> 00:37:35,878 [Gasps] 519 00:37:40,300 --> 00:37:41,425 Josh? 520 00:37:42,510 --> 00:37:43,928 [Moans] 521 00:37:44,095 --> 00:37:46,096 I'm feeling a little better now. 522 00:37:46,264 --> 00:37:51,477 Josh? 523 00:37:53,813 --> 00:37:55,481 I think I had an accident. 524 00:37:58,610 --> 00:37:59,985 Josh? 525 00:38:08,828 --> 00:38:10,621 Josh, what are you doing? 526 00:38:13,291 --> 00:38:15,000 Oh, my God. 527 00:38:16,962 --> 00:38:18,045 [Gasps] 528 00:38:21,174 --> 00:38:23,634 [Shrieking, panting] 529 00:38:26,805 --> 00:38:38,983 Josh? 530 00:38:40,527 --> 00:38:43,696 What the hell did you do to me?! 531 00:38:45,407 --> 00:38:47,032 [Siren blaring] 532 00:38:48,702 --> 00:38:50,703 [♪ Bobot Adrenaline: "Blast"] 533 00:38:59,337 --> 00:39:02,381 - [Music stops] - Oh... 534 00:39:02,549 --> 00:39:04,675 You were almost going 70 back there, buddy. 535 00:39:04,843 --> 00:39:06,260 Don't you have someplace better to be? 536 00:39:06,428 --> 00:39:08,053 Like boning my stepdaughter? 537 00:39:08,221 --> 00:39:11,056 I'll get to that. First things first. 538 00:39:23,069 --> 00:39:24,945 You're all good. 539 00:39:25,113 --> 00:39:27,448 - For now. - Oh, you looking for a raise? 540 00:39:27,615 --> 00:39:29,450 With any luck, your little theme park's gonna take off, 541 00:39:29,617 --> 00:39:32,369 and I won't have to live off a deputy's salary forever. 542 00:39:32,537 --> 00:39:35,372 So... we're good here? 543 00:39:35,540 --> 00:39:37,750 Yeah. Did you check those outflow pipes at the lake? 544 00:39:37,917 --> 00:39:40,461 Maddy did. [scoffs] Nearly got herself killed. 545 00:39:40,628 --> 00:39:42,463 What about the grates? Are they still intact? 546 00:39:42,630 --> 00:39:45,591 Should be good. Unless there's another way into the park. 547 00:39:45,759 --> 00:39:47,301 Like that bootleg well you drilled. 548 00:39:47,469 --> 00:39:49,970 - Don't you worry about that. - I do worry, Chet. 549 00:39:50,138 --> 00:39:51,972 I'm the one protecting your unlawful ass. 550 00:39:53,224 --> 00:39:55,225 Let me tell you something. 551 00:39:55,393 --> 00:39:58,979 Why don't you worry about keeping Maddy and Johnny Law off my ass, all right? 552 00:39:59,147 --> 00:40:01,482 - I'll take care of my water park. - OK. 553 00:40:01,649 --> 00:40:04,902 - Have a nice night, Deputy. - You, too, Chet. 554 00:40:05,070 --> 00:40:07,279 Oh, by the way... 555 00:40:07,447 --> 00:40:09,782 - What in the hell's this? - I told you you were speeding. 556 00:40:09,949 --> 00:40:12,451 - Are you shitting me? - Just doing my job. 557 00:40:12,619 --> 00:40:14,620 [Sirens wailing] 558 00:40:14,788 --> 00:40:16,121 You're a crooked cop. 559 00:40:30,470 --> 00:40:32,304 [Barry] What a night, huh? 560 00:40:32,472 --> 00:40:36,433 [Inhales] So, um... you and Kyle. 561 00:40:36,601 --> 00:40:38,602 You guys are gonna get back together, or...? 562 00:40:38,770 --> 00:40:40,354 No. Definitely not. 563 00:40:40,522 --> 00:40:44,274 I don't... I don't think so. Probably not. 564 00:40:45,985 --> 00:40:47,861 You really ran the gamut of indecisiveness on that one, 565 00:40:48,029 --> 00:40:50,781 - you know that, right? - Yeah, I kind of did, didn't I? 566 00:40:53,701 --> 00:40:57,329 Josh cut off his penis because something came out of my vagina. 567 00:41:00,792 --> 00:41:04,503 He should be coming to shortly, so the nurse is gonna take you guys back there. 568 00:41:05,839 --> 00:41:07,506 You guys can probably go. 569 00:41:07,674 --> 00:41:11,301 Josh is still sedated, and I'm gonna stick around to get a statement. 570 00:41:11,469 --> 00:41:13,512 I'll let you guys know if I find anything out, OK? 571 00:41:13,680 --> 00:41:14,805 How's Shelby? 572 00:41:14,973 --> 00:41:16,974 She's not making a whole lot of sense right now, 573 00:41:17,142 --> 00:41:19,726 but I'll keep an eye on her, too. 574 00:41:19,894 --> 00:41:22,980 - What about you? You all right? - I'm pretty tired. 575 00:41:23,148 --> 00:41:24,731 Get some rest and I'll call you. 576 00:41:37,036 --> 00:41:38,203 [Sighs] 577 00:41:51,217 --> 00:41:53,218 [Water running] 578 00:42:11,070 --> 00:42:12,070 [Faucet squeaks] 579 00:43:01,663 --> 00:43:02,663 [Gasps] 580 00:43:24,686 --> 00:43:26,645 [Sportscast plays over TV] 581 00:43:26,813 --> 00:43:28,814 [Sighs] 582 00:43:48,835 --> 00:43:49,835 [Electronic tone plays] 583 00:43:51,170 --> 00:43:53,463 [Hums] 584 00:43:54,674 --> 00:43:56,675 ♪ I'm the love hunter 585 00:43:56,843 --> 00:43:58,885 ♪ Hear what I say 586 00:43:59,053 --> 00:44:00,846 ♪ Get on your knees 587 00:44:01,014 --> 00:44:02,848 ♪ Learn how to pray 588 00:44:03,016 --> 00:44:05,058 ♪ 'Cause the love hunter's comin' 589 00:44:05,226 --> 00:44:07,978 ♪ To take you away 590 00:44:08,146 --> 00:44:11,189 ♪ The love hunter's comin' 591 00:44:11,357 --> 00:44:13,525 ♪ Today... 592 00:44:13,693 --> 00:44:15,360 [woman] That is so sad. 593 00:44:17,030 --> 00:44:20,157 Come to bed, Hoffy. It's nappy time. 594 00:44:20,325 --> 00:44:22,534 ♪ I am the love hunter 595 00:44:22,702 --> 00:44:24,536 ♪ Hear what I say 596 00:44:24,704 --> 00:44:26,038 ♪ Looks like Dawn 597 00:44:26,205 --> 00:44:28,206 ♪ Is ready to play... 598 00:44:28,374 --> 00:44:29,875 I'm Rochelle. 599 00:44:31,044 --> 00:44:32,669 I'm Dawn. 600 00:44:32,837 --> 00:44:34,421 Right. 601 00:44:35,673 --> 00:44:37,716 ♪ I am the love hunter 602 00:44:37,884 --> 00:44:39,843 ♪ Two chicks for me 603 00:44:40,011 --> 00:44:43,347 ♪ 'Cause I am the biggest star on TV ♪ 604 00:44:43,514 --> 00:44:46,683 Yeah! Yeah, let's party! 605 00:44:46,851 --> 00:44:49,895 [♪ Moros Eros: "Quit, You're Being Thoughtless"] 606 00:45:07,914 --> 00:45:09,956 Welcome to rock bottom. 607 00:45:15,088 --> 00:45:17,923 Excuse me. Can we...? Please? Thank you. 608 00:45:21,719 --> 00:45:23,887 [Indistinct chatter] 609 00:45:29,143 --> 00:45:30,394 Wait. 610 00:45:39,153 --> 00:45:40,737 I don't know if I can do this. 611 00:45:40,905 --> 00:45:42,823 All you gotta do, take baby steps. 612 00:45:42,990 --> 00:45:44,825 Just little baby steps. 613 00:45:44,992 --> 00:45:47,619 What the hell you talking about baby steps for? 614 00:45:47,787 --> 00:45:50,831 In case you haven't noticed, fish ate my damn legs. 615 00:45:50,998 --> 00:45:52,958 I hate the water. I hate it. 616 00:45:53,126 --> 00:45:54,459 Remember what Dr. Smith said. 617 00:45:54,627 --> 00:45:56,795 This is all about our road to recovery. 618 00:45:56,963 --> 00:45:59,756 We'll start out with a harmless little kiddie pool. 619 00:45:59,924 --> 00:46:01,633 I mean, what's the worst that can happen? 620 00:46:01,801 --> 00:46:04,302 A couple kids whizzing, that's all. 621 00:46:04,470 --> 00:46:05,971 Kids whizzing? 622 00:46:07,598 --> 00:46:09,307 I can handle that. 623 00:46:09,475 --> 00:46:12,602 [♪ Automatic Music Explosion: "C'mon I Can't Wait"] 624 00:46:22,155 --> 00:46:28,493 I'm not afraid of some punk-ass water. 625 00:46:31,789 --> 00:46:33,206 I can't. 626 00:46:33,374 --> 00:46:35,041 Don't worry about it. We'll figure out something else. 627 00:46:35,209 --> 00:46:37,002 - Uh... - No, it's weak. 628 00:46:37,170 --> 00:46:38,837 [Panting] Dump me in the water. 629 00:46:40,131 --> 00:46:41,465 - What? - You heard what I said. 630 00:46:41,632 --> 00:46:43,884 Get behind the chair, grab the handles, 631 00:46:44,051 --> 00:46:46,678 and dump my sorry ass in the water. 632 00:46:46,846 --> 00:46:49,306 The way that parents toss their kids into the pool when they wanna swim? 633 00:46:49,474 --> 00:46:50,849 That's a great idea. OK. 634 00:46:51,017 --> 00:46:52,559 All right, I can do this. Here we go. 635 00:46:52,727 --> 00:46:54,811 - One, two... - Just stop! 636 00:46:54,979 --> 00:46:56,521 OK. OK, right. What happened? 637 00:46:56,689 --> 00:46:58,815 - Why'd you stop? - You said stop. 638 00:46:58,983 --> 00:47:00,692 No, don't listen to my pussy-ass mouth. 639 00:47:00,860 --> 00:47:03,028 No matter what I say, dump me in the water. 640 00:47:03,196 --> 00:47:05,906 OK, got it. Not gonna listen to your pussy-ass mouth. 641 00:47:06,073 --> 00:47:07,699 I mean, you don't have a pussy-ass mouth, I'm just saying... 642 00:47:07,867 --> 00:47:09,868 - Dump me in the water. - OK, OK. Here we go. 643 00:47:10,036 --> 00:47:13,872 - One, two... - Ah, shit. No, no, I changed my mind! 644 00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:15,916 - No, no, no, you're going in. - No, I changed my mind. 645 00:47:16,083 --> 00:47:17,375 - I don't wanna go in the water. - You're going in. 646 00:47:17,543 --> 00:47:19,169 - No, I don't wanna go in! - Hey! 647 00:47:19,337 --> 00:47:20,378 - You're going! - No! 648 00:47:20,546 --> 00:47:22,881 - Leave him alone! - No, no, no, he wants to go in. 649 00:47:23,049 --> 00:47:24,925 No, the hell I do. I don't wanna go in. 650 00:47:25,092 --> 00:47:28,720 What's wrong with you? Don't push that poor legless stump into the pool. 651 00:47:28,888 --> 00:47:31,264 Yeah, that's right, don't dump this poor legless stump in the pool. 652 00:47:31,432 --> 00:47:33,391 OK, you know what? You're gonna go into the water. 653 00:47:33,559 --> 00:47:35,894 - No, I don't wanna go! - [Screaming] 654 00:47:37,897 --> 00:47:40,857 [Gasps] Not cool, man. 655 00:47:41,025 --> 00:47:43,109 I'm not afraid of some punk-ass water. 656 00:47:43,277 --> 00:47:44,528 Not cool at all. 657 00:47:52,787 --> 00:47:54,913 Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, 658 00:47:55,081 --> 00:47:57,582 hot moms of all ages, 659 00:47:57,750 --> 00:48:01,962 - welcome to The Big Wet! - [Cheers, applause] 660 00:48:04,632 --> 00:48:08,969 And now, the moment you've all been waiting for. 661 00:48:09,136 --> 00:48:12,722 The most famous lifeguard of all time. 662 00:48:12,890 --> 00:48:15,308 Who wants to party with the Hoff? 663 00:48:15,476 --> 00:48:19,604 Welcome, David Hasselhoff! 664 00:48:21,941 --> 00:48:28,071 - [Crowd cheering] - [♪ Jason Scheff: "I'm Always Here"] 665 00:48:28,239 --> 00:48:31,491 Here he is, David Hasselhoff! 666 00:48:31,659 --> 00:48:32,617 Ladies. 667 00:48:32,785 --> 00:48:35,161 You know, ladies, if you play your cards right, 668 00:48:35,329 --> 00:48:38,415 you might get some private mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. 669 00:48:38,583 --> 00:48:40,750 - [Chuckles] - [Cheering] 670 00:48:40,918 --> 00:48:43,128 All right, without any further ado... 671 00:48:44,297 --> 00:48:47,340 ...let's all get wet and wild! 672 00:48:47,508 --> 00:48:50,468 - [Cheering] - I'll show you to your stand. 673 00:48:51,804 --> 00:48:54,681 How you ladies doing? Good? Yeah! 674 00:48:54,849 --> 00:48:57,684 Oh, yeah. Look at this. Whoa, I'm in love! 675 00:48:57,852 --> 00:49:00,145 Come on, take a photo with me. Get over here, come over here. 676 00:49:00,313 --> 00:49:02,814 Right here. Come right here. Yeah, baby! 677 00:49:02,982 --> 00:49:04,524 Yeah, you're beautiful. 678 00:49:04,692 --> 00:49:06,985 You will never drown, and you're beautiful. 679 00:49:07,153 --> 00:49:08,695 Do a little mouth-to-mouth. 680 00:49:08,863 --> 00:49:10,697 - No way! - [Laughter] 681 00:49:10,865 --> 00:49:13,408 - [Woman] Woo! - [Shouting] 682 00:49:13,576 --> 00:49:16,369 ["Summertime" playing] 683 00:49:18,497 --> 00:49:20,957 All right. All right, ladies, thank you very much. 684 00:49:21,125 --> 00:49:23,001 Good-bye now. 685 00:49:28,674 --> 00:49:30,675 [Engine clattering] 686 00:49:40,519 --> 00:49:42,687 [Engine stops] 687 00:49:42,855 --> 00:49:43,897 [Maddy] I knew it. 688 00:49:45,358 --> 00:49:47,317 [Chet] What are you doing back here, Maddy? 689 00:49:48,319 --> 00:49:50,362 I saw this when I was taking inventory, 690 00:49:50,529 --> 00:49:52,489 but I didn't think to ask why it was here until now. 691 00:49:52,657 --> 00:49:55,367 We pump our own water now. Fuck the utilities, right? 692 00:49:55,534 --> 00:49:57,202 You can't fill this water park off a well. 693 00:49:57,370 --> 00:49:59,204 [Laughing] It's not a standard well. 694 00:49:59,372 --> 00:50:02,540 We drilled down a whole lot further, hit an underwater lake. 695 00:50:02,708 --> 00:50:04,876 We got enough water to last us till kingdom come. 696 00:50:05,044 --> 00:50:07,712 - You have no idea what you've done. - Oh, sure I do. 697 00:50:07,880 --> 00:50:10,215 - Got us a nice big fat profit. - You don't understand! 698 00:50:10,383 --> 00:50:12,759 You could be pumping piranha straight through the water intake pipes! 699 00:50:12,927 --> 00:50:14,886 Maddy, it's opening day. 700 00:50:15,054 --> 00:50:17,722 I have shelled out $100,000, 701 00:50:17,890 --> 00:50:20,558 and you want me to close shop because there might, 702 00:50:20,726 --> 00:50:23,395 just might, be piranha in the pipe? 703 00:50:23,562 --> 00:50:26,606 What else? Ghosts? Bogeymen? 704 00:50:26,774 --> 00:50:30,068 Sharks? Snakes? You're laughable. 705 00:50:30,236 --> 00:50:31,903 Laughable. 706 00:50:32,071 --> 00:50:33,905 Come on, kid. 707 00:50:34,073 --> 00:50:35,740 You've been watching too many movies, little girl. 708 00:50:35,908 --> 00:50:38,535 - You should read romance novels. - [Engine starts] 709 00:50:40,538 --> 00:50:44,040 Are we done? I got work to do. 710 00:50:53,884 --> 00:50:56,219 [Thumping] 711 00:51:12,820 --> 00:51:14,779 [Growls] 712 00:51:22,747 --> 00:51:25,457 - Mommy, I got bit. - Let me see. 713 00:51:26,625 --> 00:51:28,460 Oh, honey, you just scraped yourself on something. 714 00:51:28,627 --> 00:51:30,420 Go tell the lifeguard, he'll get you a Band-Aid. 715 00:51:30,588 --> 00:51:33,131 - No, no, it was a piranis. - It was not a piranha. 716 00:51:33,299 --> 00:51:36,009 You've heard too many people talking about piranha. Now scoot. 717 00:51:41,140 --> 00:51:42,807 [Boy] Hello. 718 00:51:42,975 --> 00:51:43,850 Hello. 719 00:51:44,018 --> 00:51:45,643 - Hey! - Hey. 720 00:51:45,811 --> 00:51:47,604 I got bit by a piranis. 721 00:51:47,772 --> 00:51:49,481 - What's your name, kid? - David. 722 00:51:49,648 --> 00:51:50,982 David? 723 00:51:52,443 --> 00:51:53,985 That's pretty cool. That's my name, too. 724 00:51:54,153 --> 00:51:56,196 - Here you go. - What... 725 00:51:56,363 --> 00:51:58,698 - What's this? - It's an autograph. 726 00:51:58,866 --> 00:52:00,492 Can I just have a Band-Aid? 727 00:52:00,659 --> 00:52:01,826 Wait a minute. 728 00:52:01,994 --> 00:52:04,996 - You don't know who I am? - No. 729 00:52:05,164 --> 00:52:06,998 - You never saw Baywatch? - Mm-mm. 730 00:52:07,166 --> 00:52:08,374 Running in slow motion? 731 00:52:08,542 --> 00:52:09,834 How about Knight Rider? 732 00:52:10,002 --> 00:52:11,669 - No. - Talking car? 733 00:52:11,837 --> 00:52:14,130 Anaconda 3? Jekyll and Hyde on Broadway? 734 00:52:14,298 --> 00:52:15,507 - Hey, hey! - What? 735 00:52:15,674 --> 00:52:17,467 - Mr. Hasselhoff! - Back off, Toro! 736 00:52:17,635 --> 00:52:21,054 I'm talkin' to my main man here. Huh? It's OK. 737 00:52:21,889 --> 00:52:24,182 You really have no idea who I am? 738 00:52:24,350 --> 00:52:27,352 Yeah. You're a lifeguard. And I need a Band-Aid. 739 00:52:27,520 --> 00:52:31,856 Can I get a Band-Aid for my main man David here, please? 740 00:52:32,024 --> 00:52:33,233 SpongeBob? 741 00:52:33,400 --> 00:52:35,819 I'm just gonna get a Band-Aid somewhere else. 742 00:52:38,155 --> 00:52:39,739 I'm a lifeguard. 743 00:52:41,367 --> 00:52:42,659 [Boy laughing] 744 00:52:57,591 --> 00:52:59,551 [Woman shrieks] 745 00:53:04,014 --> 00:53:07,016 - Are you OK? - I saw a fish, in the splash pool. 746 00:53:07,184 --> 00:53:09,602 I know this is crazy, but it was a piranha like the ones on the news. 747 00:53:09,770 --> 00:53:11,896 I swear to God! 748 00:53:12,064 --> 00:53:14,065 Hey! Everybody out of the pool! Out of the pool! 749 00:53:14,233 --> 00:53:17,569 Hey, hey! You have to get them out of the pool right now! 750 00:53:18,571 --> 00:53:20,029 [Scoffs] 751 00:53:20,197 --> 00:53:21,906 Hey! No running! [Whistle trills] 752 00:53:25,619 --> 00:53:27,912 Game over, Chet. We gotta shut the water park down right now. 753 00:53:28,080 --> 00:53:29,914 What part of "no fucking way" don't you hear? 754 00:53:30,082 --> 00:53:32,417 A woman saw a piranha in the splash pool. 755 00:53:32,585 --> 00:53:34,544 Did you see it? 756 00:53:34,712 --> 00:53:36,880 - Did you see it? - No, but... 757 00:53:37,047 --> 00:53:38,715 You've got nothing. That's what but. 758 00:53:38,883 --> 00:53:41,092 I'm evacuating this water park whether you like it or not. 759 00:53:41,260 --> 00:53:43,887 - Maddy, Maddy, Maddy, Maddy. - Take care of this, will you? 760 00:53:44,054 --> 00:53:46,806 Chet's right, OK? You're just gonna cause more panic. 761 00:53:46,974 --> 00:53:49,434 - I'm sorry. Whose side are you on? - I'm on the side of being calm. 762 00:53:49,602 --> 00:53:51,144 Let's just go check things out, OK? 763 00:53:51,312 --> 00:53:53,605 You don't believe me. I'm the one who called you 764 00:53:53,772 --> 00:53:55,732 and you don't fucking believe me? 765 00:53:55,900 --> 00:53:57,609 Come on, kids, get out of the pool. 766 00:53:57,776 --> 00:54:00,111 Please, get out of the water park. Please just get out of the water. 767 00:54:00,279 --> 00:54:02,113 - Hang on, I can't... - [shrieks] 768 00:54:02,281 --> 00:54:04,949 - I can't let you do that. OK? - Let go of me! 769 00:54:05,117 --> 00:54:06,492 [Barry] What the fuck you doing, man? Let her go. 770 00:54:06,660 --> 00:54:09,162 Hey, what are you gonna do, Shark Boy? Huh? 771 00:54:09,330 --> 00:54:11,456 Poke me with your fucking trident? 772 00:54:11,624 --> 00:54:13,458 Let me give you a little piece of advice, buddy. 773 00:54:13,626 --> 00:54:14,792 You're gonna need a bigger one. 774 00:54:16,086 --> 00:54:17,128 Come on! 775 00:54:26,305 --> 00:54:28,014 [Shrieking] 776 00:54:38,484 --> 00:54:40,485 [Wind whistling] 777 00:55:03,509 --> 00:55:04,842 [Screaming] 778 00:55:05,010 --> 00:55:06,636 [Crunching] 779 00:55:07,680 --> 00:55:10,098 Oh, my God. [Whistle trills] 780 00:55:26,490 --> 00:55:28,866 [Screaming] 781 00:55:29,034 --> 00:55:30,535 Get out of the water! 782 00:55:45,175 --> 00:55:47,218 Come on, go! Go! 783 00:55:47,386 --> 00:55:49,554 I can't believe it. They're back! They're back. 784 00:55:49,722 --> 00:55:53,057 They'll find you. They'll always fucking find you. No matter where you go! 785 00:55:53,225 --> 00:55:54,350 [Tires screech] 786 00:55:58,105 --> 00:55:59,772 [Echoes] Help! 787 00:56:02,234 --> 00:56:03,943 Bring me my legs. 788 00:56:18,625 --> 00:56:20,752 - [Clangs] - Titanium, motherfuckers. 789 00:56:21,628 --> 00:56:22,795 Eat this. 790 00:56:24,423 --> 00:56:27,633 - [Gunshots] - [Slow choral music plays] 791 00:56:43,275 --> 00:56:44,275 Get out of there! 792 00:56:53,243 --> 00:56:54,786 [Gunshots continue] 793 00:57:00,292 --> 00:57:03,086 - I hate the water. - I hate the fish. 794 00:57:03,420 --> 00:57:06,130 Help me! Help! Help me! 795 00:57:10,344 --> 00:57:13,971 Hey! People are dying! You're a lifeguard, do something! 796 00:57:14,139 --> 00:57:15,932 I'm not a lifeguard, never was one. 797 00:57:16,100 --> 00:57:20,645 Help! Help me! Help, lifeguard! 798 00:57:20,813 --> 00:57:22,647 There's still kids going down those slides! 799 00:57:22,815 --> 00:57:25,274 Once these idiots get out of the water, 800 00:57:25,442 --> 00:57:27,360 it's not as if the fish are gonna follow them home. 801 00:57:28,487 --> 00:57:31,489 [Little David] Help me! Help! 802 00:57:37,496 --> 00:57:39,705 Help me! 803 00:57:39,873 --> 00:57:42,333 You went back in the water. 804 00:57:42,501 --> 00:57:45,628 You little ginger moron. 805 00:57:45,796 --> 00:57:48,840 [Little David] Mitch! You're a lifeguard, Mitch! 806 00:57:49,007 --> 00:57:51,467 [♪ Jason Scheff: "I'm Always Here"] 807 00:58:03,897 --> 00:58:05,356 [Shouts] 808 00:58:06,525 --> 00:58:08,192 [Music warps, stops] 809 00:58:09,194 --> 00:58:10,987 Holy fuck! 810 00:58:11,155 --> 00:58:13,197 I'm getting old. 811 00:58:13,365 --> 00:58:16,200 - [Music resumes] - [Shouts] 812 00:58:17,911 --> 00:58:19,036 I got ya! 813 00:58:19,204 --> 00:58:21,455 [Grunts] Yeah! 814 00:58:22,166 --> 00:58:23,666 I made a rescue. 815 00:58:24,668 --> 00:58:27,670 I actually made a rescue. 816 00:58:29,047 --> 00:58:31,716 Can you put me down now? 817 00:58:32,885 --> 00:58:35,094 [Screaming continuing] 818 00:58:52,946 --> 00:58:54,071 Chet! 819 00:58:55,407 --> 00:58:57,575 - Chet! - [Grunting] 820 00:58:58,911 --> 00:59:01,245 Do you see 'em? Do you see 'em now? 821 00:59:01,413 --> 00:59:03,539 [Groaning] 822 00:59:03,707 --> 00:59:05,583 [Maddy] We've gotta drain the pools. 823 00:59:11,089 --> 00:59:12,798 Hey, Barry! Since you can't swim, 824 00:59:12,966 --> 00:59:14,759 I need you to go to the pump house and force-drain the pools. 825 00:59:14,927 --> 00:59:16,093 - I've never done that before. - It's easy. 826 00:59:16,261 --> 00:59:18,471 The levers, they're all the way down. You push 'em straight up. 827 00:59:18,639 --> 00:59:19,972 - OK, got it. - All right, thank you. 828 00:59:20,140 --> 00:59:21,432 Wait, wait. 829 00:59:21,600 --> 00:59:23,059 I just want you to know that whatever happens, 830 00:59:23,227 --> 00:59:25,937 I've loved you since seventh grade. I always will. 831 00:59:26,104 --> 00:59:27,271 I thought you were gay. 832 00:59:28,440 --> 00:59:29,565 Really? 833 00:59:42,996 --> 00:59:44,497 [Chet] I've gotta get out of here. 834 00:59:44,665 --> 00:59:45,957 It's not my fault. 835 00:59:47,167 --> 00:59:48,501 - [Gasping] - Ah! 836 00:59:48,669 --> 00:59:50,169 - What the fuck?! - [Shouts indistinctly] 837 00:59:50,337 --> 00:59:53,172 - Get off me. - [Growling] 838 00:59:54,508 --> 00:59:56,759 Barry, dude, come over here, please, man! 839 00:59:56,927 --> 00:59:57,802 Look at my ass! 840 00:59:59,346 --> 01:00:02,265 - Holy shit! - Whatever it is, just get it out! 841 01:00:02,432 --> 01:00:03,975 [Barry] OK. This is gonna hurt. Ready? 842 01:00:04,142 --> 01:00:05,810 One, two... 843 01:00:07,479 --> 01:00:08,980 [screaming] 844 01:00:10,983 --> 01:00:12,525 OK, come on! We gotta get to the pump! 845 01:00:12,859 --> 01:00:14,902 [Screaming continuing] 846 01:00:35,340 --> 01:00:36,674 Sorry, kid. 847 01:00:38,802 --> 01:00:40,136 It's not my fault! 848 01:00:46,476 --> 01:00:49,687 - [Girl screams] - Oh, shit! 849 01:00:52,232 --> 01:00:54,025 [Chet] Move out of the way! 850 01:00:54,192 --> 01:00:56,402 Move it! Move it! 851 01:00:56,570 --> 01:01:00,114 [Slow choral music plays] 852 01:01:04,619 --> 01:01:06,871 [Metallic tinging] 853 01:01:07,039 --> 01:01:09,040 [Slow choral music continuing] 854 01:01:16,006 --> 01:01:17,548 [Screaming] 855 01:01:27,559 --> 01:01:29,727 [Growling] 856 01:01:35,692 --> 01:01:37,526 OK, listen. I need you to get all the first aid supplies 857 01:01:37,694 --> 01:01:40,905 and bring 'em outside. Got it? You got it, go. 858 01:01:41,073 --> 01:01:42,865 I need first aid. 859 01:01:43,033 --> 01:01:45,701 [Inhales, grunts] 860 01:01:45,869 --> 01:01:47,411 [Screaming continuing] 861 01:01:58,465 --> 01:02:00,466 [Growling] 862 01:02:18,735 --> 01:02:20,611 - [Kyle] Maddy! - Ah! Help me! 863 01:02:20,779 --> 01:02:24,281 - Maddy! Maddy! Maddy, come here! - Help me! 864 01:02:24,449 --> 01:02:26,325 I didn't know. I promise you, I didn't know. 865 01:02:26,493 --> 01:02:28,119 - What are you talking about? - The well. 866 01:02:28,286 --> 01:02:30,788 Chet promised me that he'd give me 35 percent of the profits 867 01:02:30,956 --> 01:02:32,456 if I turned a blind eye. 868 01:02:32,624 --> 01:02:34,417 Just help me. Get me out of here, please! 869 01:02:34,584 --> 01:02:36,919 - I didn't know that... - Kyle, please! 870 01:02:37,087 --> 01:02:38,963 - Please, just help me! - The blood. 871 01:02:39,131 --> 01:02:41,257 - Help me! - The blood! 872 01:02:41,425 --> 01:02:44,385 - Kyle, please! - I can't. I can't do this. 873 01:02:44,553 --> 01:02:47,847 - I'm sorry. - No, no, don't, don't! 874 01:02:48,014 --> 01:02:50,015 Please help me! [grunts] 875 01:02:50,183 --> 01:02:52,476 - Where's Maddy? Where's Maddy?! - She's gone, I couldn't save her! 876 01:02:52,644 --> 01:02:55,604 - Help me! Help! - Maddy! Maddy! 877 01:03:08,160 --> 01:03:09,285 OK... 878 01:03:11,872 --> 01:03:14,832 [panting] 879 01:03:15,000 --> 01:03:17,042 Be a man, Kyle. Be a man. Be a man. 880 01:03:17,210 --> 01:03:18,836 Be a man, Kyle! 881 01:03:19,254 --> 01:03:20,838 Maddy! 882 01:03:24,176 --> 01:03:26,719 Oh, I can't swim! Help! 883 01:03:34,519 --> 01:03:35,936 Oh! 884 01:03:43,987 --> 01:03:45,196 This was a bad idea. 885 01:04:28,573 --> 01:04:30,407 [Growling] 886 01:04:50,095 --> 01:04:53,264 [Engine slows, stops] 887 01:06:05,170 --> 01:06:06,462 [Coughing] 888 01:06:06,630 --> 01:06:07,838 Barry? 889 01:06:46,169 --> 01:06:48,712 Save a life, save a life. Save a life, Kyle. 890 01:06:48,880 --> 01:06:52,883 Be the hero! [screaming] 891 01:06:53,051 --> 01:06:55,719 I got you! Oh, my God! 892 01:06:55,887 --> 01:06:59,723 Get out of the pool! Oh, my God! 893 01:07:01,267 --> 01:07:03,227 Medic! 894 01:07:03,395 --> 01:07:05,729 I need a medic! 895 01:07:06,564 --> 01:07:08,065 Maddy! 896 01:07:10,068 --> 01:07:11,944 [Splashes] 897 01:07:13,905 --> 01:07:14,947 Maddy. 898 01:07:16,074 --> 01:07:17,574 [Grunts] 899 01:07:22,288 --> 01:07:26,542 [Laughs] 900 01:07:26,710 --> 01:07:29,420 Nobody munches on Big Dave's ass, bitch! 901 01:07:31,089 --> 01:07:34,049 IAdiós, pescados! 902 01:07:39,764 --> 01:07:41,306 [Exploding] 903 01:07:45,437 --> 01:07:48,272 [Slow choral music plays] 904 01:08:59,844 --> 01:09:02,513 [Choral music continuing] 905 01:09:24,327 --> 01:09:26,161 [♪ Amber Pacific: "It's a Good Life"] 906 01:09:26,329 --> 01:09:28,872 Woo hoo-hoo-hoo! 907 01:09:50,562 --> 01:09:53,564 How the hell did you buy that shotgun leg? 908 01:09:53,731 --> 01:09:56,233 With the money I saved on socks. 909 01:09:56,401 --> 01:09:57,901 [Phone ringing] 910 01:09:58,069 --> 01:10:00,237 - Hello? - Maddy! 911 01:10:00,405 --> 01:10:02,030 You're not gonna believe this. 912 01:10:02,198 --> 01:10:06,535 I was right. They're evolving. 913 01:10:06,703 --> 01:10:09,413 They're learning to walk. 914 01:10:10,540 --> 01:10:12,958 Yeah, I know. 915 01:10:16,754 --> 01:10:18,589 [Growls] 916 01:10:22,552 --> 01:10:24,219 [Woman] David! 917 01:10:24,387 --> 01:10:26,471 David! Get away from that thing! 918 01:10:26,639 --> 01:10:29,933 Mom, it's OK. They're slow on land. 919 01:10:31,144 --> 01:10:33,395 [Screaming] 920 01:10:33,563 --> 01:10:36,607 [Screams] 921 01:10:36,774 --> 01:10:38,317 Oh, my God! 922 01:10:38,484 --> 01:10:40,444 [Sobbing] 923 01:10:40,612 --> 01:10:43,238 Little ginger moron. 924 01:10:43,573 --> 01:10:45,449 [♪ Amber Pacific: "It's a Good Life"] 925 01:12:19,836 --> 01:12:21,878 [♪ Hasselhoff: "Love Hunter"] 926 01:12:22,046 --> 01:12:24,339 ♪ I'm the fish hunter 927 01:12:24,507 --> 01:12:26,675 ♪ You are my prey 928 01:12:26,843 --> 01:12:29,011 ♪ Swim all you want 929 01:12:29,178 --> 01:12:31,513 ♪ You won't get away 930 01:12:31,681 --> 01:12:34,057 ♪ 'Cause the fish hunter's comin' 931 01:12:34,225 --> 01:12:37,060 ♪ To catch you today 932 01:12:37,228 --> 01:12:41,106 ♪ Fish hunter's comin' your way 933 01:12:41,274 --> 01:12:46,862 ♪ With my trident I'm comin' to slay 934 01:12:47,030 --> 01:12:52,242 ♪ I'm the fish hunter You are my prey ♪ 935 01:12:52,410 --> 01:12:54,536 Fish hunter! 936 01:13:39,916 --> 01:13:42,125 [Screaming] 937 01:13:43,169 --> 01:13:44,836 [Screams, spits] 938 01:13:45,671 --> 01:13:48,256 ...lakes, rivers... 939 01:13:48,424 --> 01:13:51,927 ...full of sulfur... oxide. - [Woman sneezes] 940 01:13:52,095 --> 01:13:54,971 [Laughter] 941 01:13:55,139 --> 01:13:58,100 Look, guys, we've gotta check the grates over the outflow pipes... 942 01:13:58,267 --> 01:13:59,434 [blows raspberry] 943 01:13:59,602 --> 01:14:02,979 Look, guys, we've gotta check the drains over the outflow... 944 01:14:03,147 --> 01:14:03,980 Fuck me. 945 01:14:04,148 --> 01:14:06,441 [Slow choral music plays] 946 01:14:15,827 --> 01:14:18,286 [♪ The Limousines: "Internet Killed the Video Star"] 947 01:14:34,262 --> 01:14:35,345 [Sings note] 948 01:14:35,513 --> 01:14:36,805 Fish hunter! 949 01:14:36,973 --> 01:14:40,350 [Laughing] Jesus Christ. OK. [grunts] 950 01:14:40,518 --> 01:14:42,644 [Man] Can we get a little tighter? 951 01:14:46,649 --> 01:14:49,109 - [Grunts] - [Man] He's gonna take his glasses off. 952 01:14:49,277 --> 01:14:52,529 [Drum beats] 953 01:14:57,034 --> 01:14:59,202 Right, either that or I was gonna wait for the drums to come and... 954 01:14:59,370 --> 01:15:00,704 [drum beats]... do that. 955 01:15:01,706 --> 01:15:03,707 You ginger little moron. 956 01:15:03,875 --> 01:15:05,834 You ginger... You... [laughing] 957 01:15:06,002 --> 01:15:08,378 - [Man] "You little ginger moron." - [Woman] "You little ginger moron." 958 01:15:08,546 --> 01:15:09,754 OK. Fuck. All right. 959 01:15:09,922 --> 01:15:12,632 You ginger little moron. 960 01:15:13,718 --> 01:15:14,634 Why are you laughing? 961 01:15:14,802 --> 01:15:16,052 - I don't know. - [Chuckles] 962 01:15:16,220 --> 01:15:18,346 ♪ I'm the love hunter ♪ 963 01:15:18,514 --> 01:15:22,267 [choking sound] Oh, God! 964 01:15:22,435 --> 01:15:24,728 - [Phone clattering] - [Woman] Hello? 965 01:15:24,896 --> 01:15:26,146 Hello? 966 01:15:26,314 --> 01:15:28,398 [♪ The Limousines: "Internet Killed the Video Star"] 967 01:15:53,758 --> 01:15:56,468 The camera, where is it? There it is. 968 01:15:57,929 --> 01:15:59,804 [Laughter] 969 01:15:59,972 --> 01:16:03,099 [Man] Action. 970 01:16:03,267 --> 01:16:04,809 We're the place with no fish... 971 01:16:04,977 --> 01:16:07,229 Oh, here we go again. One, two, three, ready? 972 01:16:07,396 --> 01:16:11,441 We're the place with no fish, but plenty of tail. 973 01:16:11,609 --> 01:16:13,568 Piranha? What? 974 01:16:13,736 --> 01:16:16,738 That's the wrong place to put it, right? OK, here we go, once again. 975 01:16:16,906 --> 01:16:18,323 What's the line? 976 01:16:18,491 --> 01:16:21,493 Come on down and cool off at the hottest hole in town. 977 01:16:22,495 --> 01:16:24,955 - Ready? Come on down... - [cell phone rings] 978 01:16:25,122 --> 01:16:28,291 Are you serious? $15! $15! 979 01:16:28,459 --> 01:16:30,961 Are you serious? Film him now! 980 01:16:33,464 --> 01:16:36,424 [Man over speaker] And just keep your hand in the middle like that. 981 01:16:36,592 --> 01:16:40,095 OK, don't do the hand because that became too 3D. 982 01:16:40,263 --> 01:16:43,473 - Do you want me to start with it out? - It was 3 double-D! 983 01:16:45,643 --> 01:16:46,685 [Chuckles] 984 01:16:46,852 --> 01:16:49,479 How the hell did they get in here? 985 01:16:49,647 --> 01:16:52,649 Even if they're the same grizzly bears? 986 01:16:56,028 --> 01:16:58,196 - Winky face! - I hate you both. 987 01:16:59,532 --> 01:17:00,490 [Josh] I'm OK with that. 988 01:17:00,658 --> 01:17:02,325 - Oh! - [Man] Action. 989 01:17:02,493 --> 01:17:04,995 Give me five, brother. 990 01:17:05,162 --> 01:17:08,164 - Who's that? - My mom. 991 01:17:08,332 --> 01:17:12,002 - She's kind of cute. - Yeah, she's got some talent. 992 01:17:12,169 --> 01:17:17,674 - She what? - She has some talent. 993 01:17:17,842 --> 01:17:20,677 Your mom has talent? Wow. 994 01:17:20,845 --> 01:17:22,220 She's pretty hot. 995 01:17:22,388 --> 01:17:24,222 Yeah, don't even try it. 996 01:17:34,525 --> 01:17:36,860 [Psychedelic rock] 997 01:17:52,877 --> 01:17:55,086 [Hip-hop] 998 01:18:01,427 --> 01:18:03,553 Best sticks in the business. 999 01:18:04,722 --> 01:18:07,098 ♪ Years ago... ♪ 1000 01:18:07,266 --> 01:18:10,060 I'm wet all the time. You wanna get wetter, 1001 01:18:10,227 --> 01:18:13,104 come on down and cool off at the hottest hole in town. 1002 01:18:13,272 --> 01:18:16,232 Mine! Ooh, that won't make the movie. 1003 01:18:16,400 --> 01:18:17,942 We should add that to the movie. 1004 01:18:18,110 --> 01:18:20,779 ♪ Two chicks for me 1005 01:18:20,946 --> 01:18:22,864 - ♪ 'Cause I'm the biggest star on... ♪ - [indistinct chatter] 1006 01:18:23,032 --> 01:18:25,241 Who are you? What are you doing? 1007 01:18:25,409 --> 01:18:27,243 Wha... Oh, my God, you're not Dawn. 1008 01:18:27,411 --> 01:18:30,413 - The flying squirrel. - [Indistinct chatter] 1009 01:18:30,581 --> 01:18:32,207 The Hoff in bed. 1010 01:18:32,375 --> 01:18:33,917 [Man] That's why I'm in this wheelchair. 1011 01:18:34,085 --> 01:18:36,086 [Woman] Guys, we're rolling. Camera is rolling. 1012 01:18:36,253 --> 01:18:37,796 We are set. Let's do this thing. 1013 01:18:37,963 --> 01:18:40,090 For God's sakes, watch the... 1014 01:18:40,257 --> 01:18:43,093 - [man] Settle down. - I'm down, man, I'm so fucking down. 1015 01:18:43,260 --> 01:18:45,095 Action! 1016 01:18:46,555 --> 01:18:49,307 David! David, get away from that thing! 1017 01:18:49,475 --> 01:18:51,601 Mom, it's OK, they're slow. 1018 01:18:55,314 --> 01:18:58,066 - [Indistinct shout] - [Screaming] 1019 01:18:58,234 --> 01:18:59,317 [Crying] 1020 01:19:01,779 --> 01:19:04,781 Stand up, stand up. Go, "Help me!" 1021 01:19:04,949 --> 01:19:09,244 Help me! 1022 01:19:09,412 --> 01:19:12,747 - And... cut. - [Boy] Nice. 1023 01:19:19,338 --> 01:19:22,465 - [Screaming] - [Whistle trills] 1024 01:19:32,143 --> 01:19:36,146 That, my darling, is what natural selection's all about.