1 00:00:12,040 --> 00:00:19,080 This programme contains some scenes which some viewers may find upsetting and strong language 2 00:00:23,160 --> 00:00:25,439 As Robert Graves wrote, in the final 3 00:00:25,440 --> 00:00:28,479 stanza of his poem Two Fusiliers, 4 00:00:28,480 --> 00:00:32,159 "Show me the two so closely bound, as we 5 00:00:32,160 --> 00:00:34,919 "By the wet bond of blood 6 00:00:34,920 --> 00:00:38,160 "By friendship, blossoming from mud 7 00:00:39,240 --> 00:00:42,519 "By death we faced him 8 00:00:42,520 --> 00:00:44,280 "And we found beauty in death 9 00:00:45,520 --> 00:00:48,199 "In dead men breath." 10 00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:50,239 Thank you. 11 00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:53,239 APPLAUSE 12 00:00:53,240 --> 00:00:55,160 PHONE CHIMES 13 00:01:17,360 --> 00:01:19,000 Hello? 14 00:01:20,520 --> 00:01:21,959 Iona? 15 00:01:21,960 --> 00:01:24,279 In the bath, babe. 16 00:01:24,280 --> 00:01:26,199 PHONE RINGS 17 00:01:26,200 --> 00:01:29,279 Good evening, Tullygarven, Townland of Ulster. 18 00:01:29,280 --> 00:01:30,839 So, what's the sketch? 19 00:01:30,840 --> 00:01:34,239 Noodles, I need to see you. 20 00:01:34,240 --> 00:01:35,559 Tully, what is it? 21 00:01:35,560 --> 00:01:37,639 Meet me at the caravan tomorrow afternoon. 22 00:01:37,640 --> 00:01:39,799 Don't piss about, just come. 23 00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:42,719 Well, it's not as if you writers ever do any work. 24 00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:44,640 Just, just tell me now. 25 00:01:46,520 --> 00:01:48,480 Get yourself home, Noodles. 26 00:01:57,800 --> 00:01:59,320 MUSIC BEATS 27 00:02:02,480 --> 00:02:04,400 CROWD CHEERS 28 00:03:21,960 --> 00:03:23,879 Why didn't you just go in? 29 00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:25,879 You've got a key. 30 00:03:25,880 --> 00:03:27,519 I wanted to wait for you. 31 00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:30,399 I stopped off in Saltcoats, got us a bottle. 32 00:03:30,400 --> 00:03:31,919 Half a bottle, 33 00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:33,439 you tight bastard. 34 00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:36,640 I was worried we wouldn't have time to finish it. 35 00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:40,120 What's going on? 36 00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:50,080 I'm fucked, Noodles. 37 00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:54,960 I didn't want to tell you on the phone. 38 00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:02,160 Well, I'm here now. 39 00:04:03,280 --> 00:04:05,040 Just take your time, all right? 40 00:04:06,720 --> 00:04:08,479 Anna and I were on holiday a few 41 00:04:08,480 --> 00:04:09,799 months ago in Cuba. 42 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:11,359 God, I love Cuba. 43 00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:13,879 I was, I was hiccupping a hell of a lot. 44 00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:15,839 Indigestion, it was the drink, I'd 45 00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:17,919 been caning it. 46 00:04:17,920 --> 00:04:20,639 So, I tell Anna when I get home 47 00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:22,079 I'm going to screw the nut, 48 00:04:22,080 --> 00:04:23,880 you know, that well-worn refrain. 49 00:04:25,080 --> 00:04:26,959 But I didn't tell her about the pain. 50 00:04:26,960 --> 00:04:28,959 And if I'm completely fucking 51 00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:31,399 honest, I'd been in pain for months. 52 00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:33,399 So I get home, go to the doctors, 53 00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:35,800 she sends me for a scan... 54 00:04:37,640 --> 00:04:39,920 ..and the rest, as they say, is cancer. 55 00:04:41,960 --> 00:04:43,919 Where? 56 00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:46,999 Oesophagus, liver, stomach and lymph nodes, 57 00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:49,759 whatever the fuck they are. 58 00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:51,879 I've got four months 59 00:04:51,880 --> 00:04:53,680 and that's the short of it. 60 00:04:56,800 --> 00:04:58,040 Don't believe it. 61 00:04:58,960 --> 00:05:00,799 We'll get another opinion. 62 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:02,879 It's not a matter of an opinion. 63 00:05:02,880 --> 00:05:04,439 You can go private, I'll sort it. 64 00:05:04,440 --> 00:05:07,839 I'd rather die than go private. No! 65 00:05:07,840 --> 00:05:10,639 It can't be four month, you look fine. 66 00:05:10,640 --> 00:05:11,879 They must've got it wrong. 67 00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:14,279 You sound like Anna. She wants me to have chemo - 68 00:05:14,280 --> 00:05:15,559 I'm not doing it. 69 00:05:15,560 --> 00:05:16,759 Tully, you have to! 70 00:05:16,760 --> 00:05:19,199 You cannot just check out, you've got responsibilities. 71 00:05:19,200 --> 00:05:21,439 Like what? Who to? Us! 72 00:05:21,440 --> 00:05:24,080 Your family, the people who love you. 73 00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:31,520 I'm doing this my way. 74 00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:44,599 You'll have everything you need, all right? Just... 75 00:05:44,600 --> 00:05:46,880 ..just ask - anything. 76 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:54,159 Don't let me die like a prick. 77 00:05:54,160 --> 00:05:56,200 We all die like pricks. I mean it. 78 00:05:57,200 --> 00:05:58,480 What's your quote? 79 00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:01,880 The Anthony and Cleopatra one. 80 00:06:03,640 --> 00:06:06,759 "Make death proud to take us"? 81 00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:09,360 That's it. That's the one. 82 00:06:23,320 --> 00:06:25,280 Does Fiona and your mum know? 83 00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:29,199 Fiona does. 84 00:06:29,200 --> 00:06:31,640 That was hard, telling her and the kids. 85 00:06:33,200 --> 00:06:34,999 They're so great. 86 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:36,880 The young are going to save us. 87 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:40,999 I haven't told Barbara and I'm not going to. 88 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:42,279 She's your mother. 89 00:06:42,280 --> 00:06:44,800 Get you, pontificating about mothers. 90 00:06:51,440 --> 00:06:53,599 Do you want to see Barbara? 91 00:06:53,600 --> 00:06:55,519 When? 92 00:06:55,520 --> 00:06:56,640 Now. We can walk. 93 00:06:59,120 --> 00:07:00,760 She'll be having her tea. 94 00:07:01,760 --> 00:07:03,280 It's soup tonight. 95 00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:08,640 Come on. 96 00:07:50,960 --> 00:07:54,439 ♪ Into the valley 97 00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:57,479 ♪ Betrothed and divine 98 00:07:57,480 --> 00:08:00,759 ♪ Realisations no virtue but who can define 99 00:08:00,760 --> 00:08:02,799 ♪ The soldiers go marching 100 00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:04,400 ♪ Those masses align... ♪ 101 00:08:06,280 --> 00:08:08,359 THEY LAUGH 102 00:08:08,360 --> 00:08:11,759 We're selling Barbara's house to pay for the home. 103 00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:13,559 That's brutal. 104 00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:17,119 She worked hard to pay for that house. She did. 105 00:08:17,120 --> 00:08:20,520 She wanted to leave us something after Woodbine died. 106 00:08:28,640 --> 00:08:31,040 I mean it, Jimmy, I don't want her to know. 107 00:08:37,040 --> 00:08:38,920 There she is. 108 00:08:43,040 --> 00:08:45,440 You got your glad rags on, Mum? 109 00:08:50,760 --> 00:08:52,480 Oh, you look nice today. 110 00:08:56,240 --> 00:08:58,040 Look who's come to see you. 111 00:08:59,320 --> 00:09:00,800 You all right, Barbara? 112 00:09:01,920 --> 00:09:05,840 It's Noodles, Mum. He's come all the way up from London. 113 00:09:07,920 --> 00:09:09,399 She won't eat it, Tully. 114 00:09:09,400 --> 00:09:11,400 It's vegetable, it's good for her. 115 00:09:13,080 --> 00:09:14,640 See if you can make her. 116 00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:20,719 Angela, this is my old friend, Jimmy Collins. 117 00:09:20,720 --> 00:09:22,639 He's a very posh writer. 118 00:09:22,640 --> 00:09:23,839 Not really. 119 00:09:23,840 --> 00:09:25,000 Good for you. 120 00:09:27,440 --> 00:09:29,320 Let's have a go at this soup. 121 00:09:36,480 --> 00:09:39,039 You used to make me soup, Barbara. 122 00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:41,440 Jimmy's broth, do you remember? 123 00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:46,480 Noodles. 124 00:09:48,600 --> 00:09:50,200 Oh, my. 125 00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:58,999 You want your music on, Mum? 126 00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:00,520 Here, Jimmy. 127 00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:06,000 PIANO MUSIC PLAYS 128 00:10:11,840 --> 00:10:14,039 How's your mum and dad, Jimmy? 129 00:10:14,040 --> 00:10:15,519 I don't know. 130 00:10:15,520 --> 00:10:17,279 Dad's gone off to find himself. 131 00:10:17,280 --> 00:10:18,759 Mum said he should have started 132 00:10:18,760 --> 00:10:21,319 by looking up his own backside. 133 00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:23,399 Her and I live separate lives now. 134 00:10:23,400 --> 00:10:25,879 How can you live separate lives in these wee houses? 135 00:10:25,880 --> 00:10:27,519 You can't swing a cat in them. 136 00:10:27,520 --> 00:10:29,999 People don't need space to be alone. 137 00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:32,199 You shouldn't be talking like that, 138 00:10:32,200 --> 00:10:33,959 not at your age. 139 00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:35,639 I'm filing for divorce. 140 00:10:35,640 --> 00:10:36,999 Don't talk daft. 141 00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:39,399 You can't divorce your mum and dad. 142 00:10:39,400 --> 00:10:40,919 How would you manage? 143 00:10:40,920 --> 00:10:43,519 I'll get a job, go out on my own, it's no big deal. 144 00:10:43,520 --> 00:10:44,599 Don't worry, Ma. 145 00:10:44,600 --> 00:10:48,159 Noodles gets things done. He'll get himself a fancy pants lawyer. 146 00:10:48,160 --> 00:10:50,039 Why do you need a lawyer, Jimmy? 147 00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:52,599 Been nicking vegetables again? 148 00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:54,279 You look nice, pet. 149 00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:56,919 You meeting Scott? Uh-huh. 150 00:10:56,920 --> 00:10:59,239 We're going to the youth meeting at the church. 151 00:10:59,240 --> 00:11:00,599 God is dead, Fiona. Tully! 152 00:11:00,600 --> 00:11:02,039 You'll upset your sister. 153 00:11:02,040 --> 00:11:03,200 He won't. 154 00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:05,919 What are you making, Mum? 155 00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:07,319 Jimmy's broth. 156 00:11:07,320 --> 00:11:08,640 DOOR OPENS 157 00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:14,839 Doesn't he have a home to go to? 158 00:11:14,840 --> 00:11:16,159 Aye. 159 00:11:16,160 --> 00:11:17,200 It's here. 160 00:11:21,200 --> 00:11:22,880 Happy families. 161 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:26,840 These boys are taking over my house. 162 00:11:28,000 --> 00:11:29,640 I'll bring you up a tray. 163 00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:36,920 Jimmy, you come here any time you want - Ewan doesn't mind. 164 00:11:43,800 --> 00:11:46,799 Mum, let's take some more, eh? Go on. 165 00:11:46,800 --> 00:11:48,720 No. 166 00:11:50,480 --> 00:11:53,440 MUSIC: Look For The Silver Lining 167 00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:16,639 Oh, my. 168 00:12:16,640 --> 00:12:19,360 You're not a bad dancer for 21. 169 00:12:32,080 --> 00:12:33,439 How long has she been like that? 170 00:12:33,440 --> 00:12:34,959 A while. 171 00:12:34,960 --> 00:12:37,079 It is what it is. 172 00:12:37,080 --> 00:12:38,519 I don't know what's worse, dying 173 00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:41,680 before your time or living beyond it. 174 00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:45,319 We've got a campaign to plan though. 175 00:12:45,320 --> 00:12:47,559 I could murder a pint. 176 00:12:47,560 --> 00:12:49,159 Let's walk. 177 00:12:49,160 --> 00:12:50,839 It's a decent hike. 178 00:12:50,840 --> 00:12:52,720 I can still walk, arsehole. 179 00:13:05,640 --> 00:13:09,039 Hang on a sec, yeah? Just... 180 00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:10,719 ..need a fag. 181 00:13:10,720 --> 00:13:11,960 Aye, that's a great idea. 182 00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:15,800 Are you sure you should be smoking? 183 00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:18,960 That nag has bolted. 184 00:13:20,360 --> 00:13:24,359 It's weird to think this dump is where you started teaching. 185 00:13:24,360 --> 00:13:27,960 It's weird to think this dump was the start of your great escape. 186 00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:37,399 Things are desperate, Miss O'Connor. 187 00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:40,319 I can't get a single job interview. 188 00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:43,440 I don't know what I'm going to do with my life. It's a disaster area. 189 00:13:44,640 --> 00:13:46,280 Sit down, James. 190 00:13:52,280 --> 00:13:54,679 That fact is, you're only 17. Nearly 18. 191 00:13:54,680 --> 00:13:56,439 And you've read more books than I have. 192 00:13:56,440 --> 00:13:59,160 You must have read some to have ended up in this dump. 193 00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:04,279 The other day you mentioned Edith Sitwell. 194 00:14:04,280 --> 00:14:06,119 James, nobody in the history of this 195 00:14:06,120 --> 00:14:09,199 school has ever mentioned Edith Sitwell. 196 00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:10,839 You know, all I know about her is 197 00:14:10,840 --> 00:14:13,519 she had a long nose and wore a lot of rings. 198 00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:15,039 You should be going to university 199 00:14:15,040 --> 00:14:17,039 with people who know who Edith Sitwell is. 200 00:14:17,040 --> 00:14:18,240 University? Yes. 201 00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:20,760 So why aren't you? 202 00:14:23,920 --> 00:14:25,160 I can't because... 203 00:14:26,680 --> 00:14:28,280 ..because... 204 00:14:29,280 --> 00:14:31,079 ..things are... 205 00:14:31,080 --> 00:14:33,359 Rough at home? 206 00:14:33,360 --> 00:14:35,200 I didn't say that. 207 00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:42,200 It's no big drama, Miss O'Connor. 208 00:14:44,280 --> 00:14:46,199 James... 209 00:14:46,200 --> 00:14:48,519 ..get out of here. 210 00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:51,800 Pass your exams, then go and do not turn back. 211 00:14:56,520 --> 00:14:58,400 We'll start with this next term. 212 00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:02,440 You're a weirdo. 213 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:06,000 And weirdos have to get out. 214 00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:10,159 Your Mrs O'Connor did you proud, you weirdo. 215 00:15:10,160 --> 00:15:13,519 I wonder how many weirdos you've done the same for. 216 00:15:13,520 --> 00:15:16,160 I guarantee they don't have another teacher like you. 217 00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:20,679 Hang on. 218 00:15:20,680 --> 00:15:22,919 FAUX AMERICAN ACCENT: You think I'm a weirdo? 219 00:15:22,920 --> 00:15:24,839 FAUX AMERICAN ACCENT: Yeah, but so what? 220 00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:27,079 Everybody's weird. 221 00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:30,679 Stand by Me, Rob Reiner, 1986. Ten points. 222 00:15:30,680 --> 00:15:33,039 Five. Fucking cheapskate. 223 00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:34,999 "I can't stand people who laugh at other people. 224 00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:37,119 "They'd get a bigger laugh if they laughed at themselves." 225 00:15:37,120 --> 00:15:38,479 Taste of Honey, predictable. 226 00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:40,599 Is it fuck predictable. Shelagh Delaney's a genius. 227 00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:43,319 I'm not talking about the words, I'm talking about the messenger. 228 00:15:43,320 --> 00:15:45,079 "Oh, God, make me good, but not yet." 229 00:15:45,080 --> 00:15:46,239 ALL: Disallowed! 230 00:15:46,240 --> 00:15:48,319 It's a fucking novel. Novels are not permitted, 231 00:15:48,320 --> 00:15:50,560 unless you're Noodles and they're your lifeblood. 232 00:15:55,720 --> 00:15:59,200 Limbo! Off to get wasted again. Where's he going? 233 00:16:05,200 --> 00:16:07,079 Do the boys know yet? 234 00:16:07,080 --> 00:16:09,959 Nope. 235 00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:13,079 I'm not ready for the onslaught of sentiment. 236 00:16:13,080 --> 00:16:14,919 You're my campaign manager, 237 00:16:14,920 --> 00:16:16,720 so you can tell them. 238 00:16:18,160 --> 00:16:21,439 No. Well, you said I only had to ask. 239 00:16:21,440 --> 00:16:23,959 I wouldn't know what to say. 240 00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:25,840 You call yourself a writer? 241 00:16:31,280 --> 00:16:35,239 I'll have an apple pie, followed by pizza. 242 00:16:35,240 --> 00:16:37,719 You mean pizza, followed by apple pie? 243 00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:41,199 I mean an apple pie followed by a pizza pie. 244 00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:42,679 Capeesh? 245 00:16:42,680 --> 00:16:45,199 Cheers. 246 00:16:45,200 --> 00:16:47,239 You're a bad bastard. 247 00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:49,319 I'm just stating my wants with clarity. 248 00:16:49,320 --> 00:16:51,759 No time to waste, Mr Writer. 249 00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:55,319 Let's do what we love best, make a plan, do a list. 250 00:16:55,320 --> 00:16:56,920 HE SIGHS 251 00:16:58,480 --> 00:16:59,560 Right. 252 00:17:02,120 --> 00:17:04,159 What's first? 253 00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:05,480 Anna. 254 00:17:06,760 --> 00:17:08,719 What am I going to do about her? 255 00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:11,199 Marry her. I mean, that's what I would do. 256 00:17:11,200 --> 00:17:13,199 You're already married. 257 00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:15,679 Don't you think it's a bit weird to do it now? 258 00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:17,679 I mean, we won't have time for a honeymoon. 259 00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:19,559 You will. 260 00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:21,119 I don't want to leave her a widow. 261 00:17:21,120 --> 00:17:23,799 She's going to be a widow whether you're married or not. 262 00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:25,400 It'll mean everything to her. 263 00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:31,439 I love her so much. 264 00:17:31,440 --> 00:17:32,639 Well, it's settled then. 265 00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:33,759 And we'll do it properly. 266 00:17:33,760 --> 00:17:35,199 No holding back, all right? 267 00:17:35,200 --> 00:17:37,359 Anna's big day. 268 00:17:37,360 --> 00:17:39,359 Yeah, but no sit-downy shite with 269 00:17:39,360 --> 00:17:42,720 150 speeches and grannies in daft hats bullshit. 270 00:17:58,440 --> 00:18:00,759 Item two. 271 00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:02,799 Chemo. 272 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:05,039 Nope. 273 00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:06,999 Seriously, what's the point? 274 00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:09,079 Extra time. 275 00:18:09,080 --> 00:18:11,879 I was always shit at penalties. 276 00:18:11,880 --> 00:18:13,360 Very true. 277 00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:22,400 Unlucky, mate. 278 00:18:23,680 --> 00:18:25,960 What did the doctor say about chemo? 279 00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:29,519 It might give me seven months. 280 00:18:29,520 --> 00:18:30,879 Fuck's sake, Tully, do it! 281 00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:33,519 Nah, a don't fancy it. It sounds like a total nightmare. 282 00:18:33,520 --> 00:18:35,200 It's seven more months with Anna. 283 00:18:37,360 --> 00:18:40,120 Look, this is my plan. Cross that out. 284 00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:43,879 It'll turn me into somebody I'm not. 285 00:18:43,880 --> 00:18:46,399 It might not, and you and Anna can use the time. 286 00:18:46,400 --> 00:18:47,679 No. 287 00:18:47,680 --> 00:18:49,679 I want control. 288 00:18:49,680 --> 00:18:51,439 So write this down. 289 00:18:51,440 --> 00:18:52,840 Item two... 290 00:18:54,160 --> 00:18:55,919 ..Switzerland. 291 00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:57,279 What, a holiday? 292 00:18:57,280 --> 00:18:59,239 The last place I'd ever go on holiday 293 00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:03,159 is the land of fence-sitting and fucking cuckoo clocks. 294 00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:05,719 You said ask you anything. 295 00:19:05,720 --> 00:19:07,839 As soon as this gets bad, and it will soon, 296 00:19:07,840 --> 00:19:10,320 get me to Switzerland for the Hitler chow-down. 297 00:19:14,360 --> 00:19:15,639 The what? 298 00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:17,359 The chow-down, the suicide bullet. 299 00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:20,799 When the bad time comes, I want to end it myself and not go skelly. 300 00:19:20,800 --> 00:19:23,360 I want to go to Switzerland and I need you to sort it. 301 00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:29,280 Are you saying... 302 00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:33,359 ..assisted dying? 303 00:19:33,360 --> 00:19:35,560 That's exactly what I'm saying. 304 00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:38,559 What does Anna say? 305 00:19:38,560 --> 00:19:40,639 I'll tell her when it's sorted, she'll be fine. 306 00:19:40,640 --> 00:19:42,999 I want you to help me. No! 307 00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:45,359 Fuck, no. 308 00:19:45,360 --> 00:19:47,999 Tully, I love you, but you can't ask me to do that. 309 00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:49,480 "Make death proud to take us." 310 00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:53,960 You said it, you gave me my last quote, you have to. 311 00:19:57,200 --> 00:19:59,000 Is that why you got me up here? 312 00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:02,840 So I got all nostalgic and say yes? 313 00:20:06,480 --> 00:20:09,119 Well, you can fuck off. 314 00:20:09,120 --> 00:20:10,520 No. 315 00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:26,280 Why me? 316 00:20:29,160 --> 00:20:31,200 You get things done, Noodles. 317 00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:47,079 Hey, darling. Hey. 318 00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:48,279 I can't talk for long. 319 00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:49,759 Second half's about to start. 320 00:20:49,760 --> 00:20:51,280 You sound so good. 321 00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:55,839 Jimmy, what is it? 322 00:20:55,840 --> 00:20:57,799 Tully's got terminal cancer. 323 00:20:57,800 --> 00:20:59,599 Oh, Jimmy, I'm so sorry. 324 00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:01,280 And he w... 325 00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:06,519 He wants me to help plan their wedding. 326 00:21:06,520 --> 00:21:09,359 Oh, poor Anna. 327 00:21:09,360 --> 00:21:11,199 I cannot... 328 00:21:11,200 --> 00:21:14,320 I mean, they love each other so much. It's hellish. 329 00:21:16,320 --> 00:21:19,599 I better go, he's, he's in the caravan, he wants to watch a film. 330 00:21:19,600 --> 00:21:21,359 He wants everything to be normal. 331 00:21:21,360 --> 00:21:23,000 Fucking normal. 332 00:22:02,760 --> 00:22:06,240 Top three films starring Robert DeNiro, go. 333 00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:09,960 Godfather Part II. Yeah. 334 00:22:11,520 --> 00:22:12,800 Taxi Driver. 335 00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:16,400 Once Upon A Time In America. 336 00:22:18,320 --> 00:22:20,920 Noodles, man alive. 337 00:22:22,160 --> 00:22:26,480 Only a lover of stone-washed jeans would leave out Raging Bull. 338 00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:30,480 Do you think Robert DeNiro's a family man? 339 00:22:31,760 --> 00:22:34,879 In dreams, aye, everyone is in dreams. 340 00:22:34,880 --> 00:22:37,039 My folks ain't. 341 00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:38,879 I am going to divorce them. 342 00:22:38,880 --> 00:22:41,079 Aye, do it. 343 00:22:41,080 --> 00:22:43,560 And come to mine whenever you like, my mum loves you. 344 00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:50,640 You're in charge, Noodles. 345 00:22:52,280 --> 00:22:54,200 Do life the way you want. 346 00:23:11,040 --> 00:23:14,879 ♪ Crow's feet are engraved on my face. 347 00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:17,280 ♪ And I'm living too late... ♪ 348 00:23:20,080 --> 00:23:21,799 Tibbs, if Karl Marx was in The Fall, 349 00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:23,399 what instrument would he play? 350 00:23:23,400 --> 00:23:25,599 Glockenspiel. 351 00:23:25,600 --> 00:23:27,559 Glockenspiel? 352 00:23:27,560 --> 00:23:29,639 Don't be daft, that's a hippy contraption. 353 00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:30,959 It's metal, industrial, 354 00:23:30,960 --> 00:23:33,719 fits with what he says about the means of production. 355 00:23:33,720 --> 00:23:35,759 It's a bourgeois piece of shite. 356 00:23:35,760 --> 00:23:37,679 Mark E would boot him out on his arse. 357 00:23:37,680 --> 00:23:40,119 Noodles, help these boys out. 358 00:23:40,120 --> 00:23:42,279 Marx would be a solid bass player. 359 00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:43,599 How come you were late? 360 00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:44,839 I was finishing my homework. 361 00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:46,320 Priorities, Noodles. 362 00:23:49,560 --> 00:23:52,720 MUSIC: Living Too Late 363 00:23:59,280 --> 00:24:01,439 Come on, drink it. 364 00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,079 I fucking hate blueberries. 365 00:24:03,080 --> 00:24:04,919 I know, but I don't care. 366 00:24:04,920 --> 00:24:06,880 Just drink it, get it down you. 367 00:24:08,120 --> 00:24:10,239 Oh, you big baby. 368 00:24:10,240 --> 00:24:12,399 I hope you didn't use your feet to mulch them. 369 00:24:12,400 --> 00:24:16,679 Why would I do that when I've got a shiny new juicer? Hmm. 370 00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:18,999 And just so as you know - 371 00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:21,319 I'm not going to let you die without a battle 372 00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:24,880 that involves the intervention of an electrical appliance. 373 00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:27,720 Come on. 374 00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:30,920 Slange. 375 00:24:32,720 --> 00:24:34,319 Oh. 376 00:24:34,320 --> 00:24:38,000 Oh, don't worry, it'll freeze. 377 00:24:39,120 --> 00:24:42,319 So, how is Iona's play? 378 00:24:42,320 --> 00:24:43,479 Good, I think. 379 00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:44,799 And when are you heading back? 380 00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:48,600 Not yet. We've got stuff to do, haven't we, Noodles? 381 00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:51,959 What stuff? 382 00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:54,959 Well, he's my campaign manager. Oh, campaign manager. 383 00:24:54,960 --> 00:24:57,919 So, er, you're running for office, Tully? 384 00:24:57,920 --> 00:25:00,759 Well, I thought I'd pass a few good laws before I croak. 385 00:25:00,760 --> 00:25:03,239 What's on your manifesto? 386 00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:04,959 Chemo, I hope. 387 00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:07,119 No chemo, I told you. 388 00:25:07,120 --> 00:25:09,119 But the first thing on the list 389 00:25:09,120 --> 00:25:11,839 is Anna's big day. 390 00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:13,120 What big day? 391 00:25:15,360 --> 00:25:17,280 Your big fuck off wedding day. 392 00:25:19,320 --> 00:25:20,640 WHISPERS: Oh. 393 00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:23,359 And who decided this? 394 00:25:23,360 --> 00:25:25,280 We did. 395 00:25:26,520 --> 00:25:29,200 And you didn't think to ask me first? 396 00:25:31,320 --> 00:25:33,520 Well, if you don't want to, then... 397 00:25:41,440 --> 00:25:45,640 Why would I marry a big baby that doesn't eat his blueberries? 398 00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:49,999 I'm sorry. 399 00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:51,680 I love you with all my heart... 400 00:25:52,880 --> 00:25:56,359 ..the only one of my organs that still functions. 401 00:25:56,360 --> 00:25:58,360 Hey. 402 00:26:00,680 --> 00:26:03,280 So, do you fancy it? 403 00:26:05,800 --> 00:26:07,280 Have the chemo... 404 00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:10,399 ..and I'll think about it. 405 00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:12,000 HE SIGHS 406 00:26:13,160 --> 00:26:16,359 You lawyers, you've got me bang to rights. 407 00:26:16,360 --> 00:26:18,119 You win. 408 00:26:18,120 --> 00:26:19,599 Do you mean it? 409 00:26:19,600 --> 00:26:22,759 I never say anything I don't mean. 410 00:26:22,760 --> 00:26:25,559 THEY LAUGH 411 00:26:25,560 --> 00:26:29,039 Oh! 412 00:26:29,040 --> 00:26:31,519 I love it, I love it, I love it, my beautiful ring! 413 00:26:31,520 --> 00:26:33,159 I love you with all of my heart! 414 00:26:33,160 --> 00:26:35,240 If I don't see you again, I'm going to die! 415 00:26:39,160 --> 00:26:40,759 How do you think he looks? 416 00:26:40,760 --> 00:26:42,319 Good. 417 00:26:42,320 --> 00:26:43,799 Yeah, I know. 418 00:26:43,800 --> 00:26:45,320 Jammy bastard. 419 00:26:48,600 --> 00:26:51,679 The wedding was your idea, wasn't it? 420 00:26:51,680 --> 00:26:53,239 Absolutely not. Really? 421 00:26:53,240 --> 00:26:54,439 Honestly. Really? 422 00:26:54,440 --> 00:26:57,159 Tully suggested it, telling you. 423 00:26:57,160 --> 00:26:58,800 It's what he wants. 424 00:27:00,520 --> 00:27:01,959 But I want to pay for it, right? 425 00:27:01,960 --> 00:27:03,559 It's my gift. No! 426 00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:05,199 No. 427 00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:07,159 We've got money. 428 00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:08,839 What are you like, coming here, 429 00:27:08,840 --> 00:27:10,600 flashing your money about? 430 00:27:11,600 --> 00:27:13,520 Just let me do it. 431 00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:18,240 I'm losing him, too. 432 00:27:27,360 --> 00:27:31,240 You know what he's like, though, all front. 433 00:27:33,040 --> 00:27:35,400 He's in a lot of pain. 434 00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:38,479 The chemo will help. 435 00:27:38,480 --> 00:27:40,400 Yeah. 436 00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:44,359 God, he's such a bugger. 437 00:27:44,360 --> 00:27:47,640 I have been literally begging him to do it and... 438 00:27:48,760 --> 00:27:51,959 ..you come along and... 439 00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:54,000 What did you say to him? 440 00:27:55,960 --> 00:27:57,960 That he'd have more time with you. 441 00:28:03,760 --> 00:28:06,160 So how much do I owe you? 442 00:28:09,600 --> 00:28:12,399 He has to do everything he can to stay with me. 443 00:28:12,400 --> 00:28:14,119 Yeah. 444 00:28:14,120 --> 00:28:16,240 He will. 445 00:28:40,640 --> 00:28:43,479 Hello. 446 00:28:43,480 --> 00:28:45,560 Iona. 447 00:28:52,240 --> 00:28:53,960 I couldn't leave you by yourself. 448 00:28:58,960 --> 00:29:00,360 Brutal. 449 00:29:02,040 --> 00:29:04,160 But refreshingly honest. 450 00:29:05,320 --> 00:29:08,159 Mr Dawson, how are you doing? 451 00:29:08,160 --> 00:29:09,920 Never better. 452 00:29:13,560 --> 00:29:16,799 So, our job now is to keep you, 453 00:29:16,800 --> 00:29:19,919 as well as possible for as long as we can. 454 00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:22,639 The chemo won't make the cancer go away, 455 00:29:22,640 --> 00:29:25,519 but it should help you stay around for a bit longer. 456 00:29:25,520 --> 00:29:27,079 Good. 457 00:29:27,080 --> 00:29:28,839 Well, I've got an important gig coming up 458 00:29:28,840 --> 00:29:31,080 and I wouldn't want to disappoint my public. 459 00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:37,479 How could this happen? 460 00:29:37,480 --> 00:29:39,400 I wish I knew, Tibbs. 461 00:29:41,480 --> 00:29:44,359 He's having chemo though, so... 462 00:29:44,360 --> 00:29:45,839 ..that should help, yeah? 463 00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:49,720 That's what we're hoping, but he's not keen though. 464 00:29:52,080 --> 00:29:55,160 OK. So... 465 00:29:57,840 --> 00:30:00,279 ..we take it as it comes. 466 00:30:00,280 --> 00:30:01,639 We rally. 467 00:30:01,640 --> 00:30:03,719 We let him be Tully. 468 00:30:03,720 --> 00:30:06,239 Do everything we can to help him stay around, 469 00:30:06,240 --> 00:30:08,440 just as long as its humanly possible. 470 00:30:10,040 --> 00:30:12,839 We do for Tully... 471 00:30:12,840 --> 00:30:14,960 ..what we should have done for Limbo. 472 00:30:18,280 --> 00:30:20,240 Limbo! 473 00:30:22,640 --> 00:30:24,040 Limbo? 474 00:30:26,640 --> 00:30:29,080 Don't drink any more, OK? 475 00:30:30,440 --> 00:30:32,879 We had a good time though, 476 00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:34,400 didn't we? 477 00:30:44,440 --> 00:30:47,759 You haven't changed, Tyrone Lennox. 478 00:30:47,760 --> 00:30:50,959 And you've sorted your life out, like we always knew you would. 479 00:30:50,960 --> 00:30:53,879 There's no secret to it. 480 00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:55,680 I just get on with it. 481 00:30:57,240 --> 00:30:58,839 Stay in touch, OK? 482 00:30:58,840 --> 00:31:01,679 And tell him... 483 00:31:01,680 --> 00:31:03,040 ..I'm here. 484 00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:41,640 Let me be on my own. 485 00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:47,359 I'm better in the tunnel on my own. 486 00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:49,199 OK. 487 00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:50,799 I've... 488 00:31:50,800 --> 00:31:52,399 ..got far more important things 489 00:31:52,400 --> 00:31:54,480 to be doing anyway, so, you know...? 490 00:31:57,000 --> 00:32:01,680 I'll just be in the kitchen if you need me, though, OK? 491 00:32:02,920 --> 00:32:04,840 Okey dokey. 492 00:32:16,920 --> 00:32:18,759 ♪ I hear footsteps 493 00:32:18,760 --> 00:32:21,120 ♪ Won't be long before we meet 494 00:32:22,480 --> 00:32:25,119 ♪ It's obvious 495 00:32:25,120 --> 00:32:27,679 ♪ Don't count me in and count me out 496 00:32:27,680 --> 00:32:30,599 ♪ And I'll be waiting for the show 497 00:32:30,600 --> 00:32:35,240 ♪ Oblivious! ♪ 498 00:32:45,360 --> 00:32:47,079 Do you know what I think we should do? 499 00:32:47,080 --> 00:32:49,159 We should kid on that we've booked 500 00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:51,519 a Kajagoogoo tribute band. 501 00:32:51,520 --> 00:32:53,559 You're evil. No way. 502 00:32:53,560 --> 00:32:56,799 Hey, do you need something to drink? 503 00:32:56,800 --> 00:32:58,519 Go back to bed, I'll get it for you. 504 00:32:58,520 --> 00:33:01,199 I don't need you to fucking get it. I can get it myself. 505 00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:03,039 DOORBELL RINGS 506 00:33:03,040 --> 00:33:04,239 I'll get that. 507 00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:07,559 No, no, no, no, I'll get it, it's probably the air purifier I ordered. 508 00:33:07,560 --> 00:33:09,479 Just go back to bed, you're annoying me now. 509 00:33:09,480 --> 00:33:10,679 DOORBELL RINGS 510 00:33:10,680 --> 00:33:11,839 I'm coming. 511 00:33:11,840 --> 00:33:13,919 Take that fucking thing away. 512 00:33:13,920 --> 00:33:17,159 We don't need a fucking air purifier. 513 00:33:17,160 --> 00:33:19,439 We don't want it, we've got enough shite! 514 00:33:19,440 --> 00:33:20,799 Just sign there, thanks. 515 00:33:20,800 --> 00:33:25,039 Sorry, he's, he's not very well at the moment. Thanks. 516 00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:27,439 Look, I know you're in a lot of pain right now, 517 00:33:27,440 --> 00:33:29,159 but I'm not your cat to kick. 518 00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:31,319 Then don't fucking apologise for me then. 519 00:33:31,320 --> 00:33:35,640 I'm dying, end of, and I wish you'd just let me get on with it! 520 00:33:51,240 --> 00:33:53,239 I love you. 521 00:33:53,240 --> 00:33:54,880 I'm sorry. 522 00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:58,560 I'm sorry. 523 00:34:05,120 --> 00:34:08,119 While the war poets express disgust 524 00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:10,519 at the unbearable horrors of war, 525 00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:15,920 they also see a glory in the sacrifice of these young soldiers. 526 00:34:21,760 --> 00:34:24,199 But their disgust... 527 00:34:24,200 --> 00:34:26,279 ..it didn't go far enough. 528 00:34:26,280 --> 00:34:28,360 There's no glory in any of it. 529 00:34:29,840 --> 00:34:32,679 All wars are a catastrophe. 530 00:34:32,680 --> 00:34:34,800 All deaths are a catastrophe. 531 00:34:36,440 --> 00:34:38,960 But to die young is always a waste. 532 00:34:42,360 --> 00:34:45,000 Life, to be sure, is nothing much to lose... 533 00:34:46,880 --> 00:34:48,560 ..but young men think it is. 534 00:34:51,080 --> 00:34:53,119 He seems to be doing quite well on the chemo. 535 00:34:53,120 --> 00:34:54,759 He hates it, though. 536 00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:56,960 You'll have notice, I'm sure. 537 00:34:58,640 --> 00:35:01,479 Been talking about other things, too, mostly about when we were kids. 538 00:35:01,480 --> 00:35:03,279 Mum always said the best times were 539 00:35:03,280 --> 00:35:05,399 when you were both hanging about the house. 540 00:35:05,400 --> 00:35:07,400 Your dad didn't like it, right enough. 541 00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:10,199 Well, he wasn't well then. 542 00:35:10,200 --> 00:35:13,879 He wasn't like that when Tully was little, he loved being round him. 543 00:35:13,880 --> 00:35:16,040 Tully just doesn't remember. 544 00:35:17,520 --> 00:35:19,719 Jimmy, he shouldn't have asked you 545 00:35:19,720 --> 00:35:21,439 to take him to Switzerland, 546 00:35:21,440 --> 00:35:23,359 not without telling Anna. 547 00:35:23,360 --> 00:35:24,520 So you know then? 548 00:35:25,680 --> 00:35:27,519 He's not gone about it the right way. 549 00:35:27,520 --> 00:35:29,039 He can't just... 550 00:35:29,040 --> 00:35:30,519 ..leave her out of it and make it 551 00:35:30,520 --> 00:35:32,800 a secret between you and him. I've said no. 552 00:35:34,400 --> 00:35:36,400 Then just let that play out. 553 00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:41,279 Just... 554 00:35:41,280 --> 00:35:43,560 ..I feel bad, you know? 555 00:35:44,560 --> 00:35:47,800 He's my best friend and he's asked me to help him. 556 00:35:48,880 --> 00:35:50,879 I know. 557 00:35:50,880 --> 00:35:52,480 You love him... 558 00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:56,999 ..but Anna does too and she's hurting, Jimmy. 559 00:35:57,000 --> 00:36:00,599 She wants him to go into a hospice and they're wonderful places, 560 00:36:00,600 --> 00:36:02,679 they would make sure that he wasn't in any pain. 561 00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:05,079 He wouldn't suffer, I've told him this. 562 00:36:05,080 --> 00:36:07,919 That's not what he wants, is it? 563 00:36:07,920 --> 00:36:09,279 No. 564 00:36:09,280 --> 00:36:10,959 And you don't want him to go to 565 00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:12,879 Switzerland either, do you? 566 00:36:12,880 --> 00:36:14,560 You don't know my feelings. 567 00:36:15,760 --> 00:36:17,039 You have a faith, Fiona. 568 00:36:17,040 --> 00:36:18,399 That's irrelevant, Jimmy. 569 00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:20,280 It's Tully's life, it's not mine. 570 00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:24,879 He is terrified he's going to end up gasping like Woodbine. 571 00:36:24,880 --> 00:36:27,239 Doesn't matter how many times I tell him 572 00:36:27,240 --> 00:36:29,360 it won't be like that, he has decided. 573 00:36:31,000 --> 00:36:33,639 So if that is his choice... 574 00:36:33,640 --> 00:36:35,479 ..then we will stand by it. 575 00:36:35,480 --> 00:36:36,839 We're taking our lead from him. 576 00:36:36,840 --> 00:36:39,200 We just want him to do right by Anna. 577 00:36:47,200 --> 00:36:49,799 They have their secrets, don't they? 578 00:36:49,800 --> 00:36:51,999 No. 579 00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:55,000 They're completely transparent, they just don't know it. 580 00:36:57,720 --> 00:36:59,239 I resent their "thing" 581 00:36:59,240 --> 00:37:01,279 sometimes, Iona, I really do. 582 00:37:01,280 --> 00:37:03,000 I resent the fact that... 583 00:37:04,000 --> 00:37:06,479 ..that Jimmy's had all these years 584 00:37:06,480 --> 00:37:07,959 with Tully and I don't. 585 00:37:07,960 --> 00:37:09,320 I won't. 586 00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:12,839 Oh, Anna... The wedding... 587 00:37:12,840 --> 00:37:14,400 ..it was Jimmy's idea, wasn't it? 588 00:37:15,960 --> 00:37:17,999 Er, not that I know of. 589 00:37:18,000 --> 00:37:19,720 Yeah, come on, it was. 590 00:37:21,040 --> 00:37:23,640 I know Tully, he doesn't want all the fuss. 591 00:37:26,360 --> 00:37:28,559 But I do. 592 00:37:28,560 --> 00:37:30,679 I really do. 593 00:37:30,680 --> 00:37:32,759 So... 594 00:37:32,760 --> 00:37:35,599 ..I'm grateful that he suggested it. 595 00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:38,399 Good. It's your day. 596 00:37:38,400 --> 00:37:41,279 Oh, it's funny, the first time 597 00:37:41,280 --> 00:37:44,559 Tully Dawson crashed into my life, 598 00:37:44,560 --> 00:37:47,240 all I wanted to do was marry him and have his kids... 599 00:37:48,880 --> 00:37:51,800 ..like I'd been waiting for him my whole life. 600 00:37:53,200 --> 00:37:54,880 You and Tully, you just... 601 00:37:56,600 --> 00:37:58,240 ..you just fit. 602 00:37:59,600 --> 00:38:01,359 I'm sorry. 603 00:38:01,360 --> 00:38:03,439 We know how awful this is for you, Anna. 604 00:38:03,440 --> 00:38:05,680 Sorry. We do. 605 00:38:06,760 --> 00:38:10,280 The chemo is so tough, Iona, it really is. 606 00:38:11,360 --> 00:38:13,199 Hey. Hey. 607 00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:18,120 You don't want him to die, that's not bad, yeah? Mm-hm. 608 00:38:20,160 --> 00:38:22,599 Yeah, his, his oncologist says that 609 00:38:22,600 --> 00:38:26,279 a strong reaction can mean that it's working. 610 00:38:26,280 --> 00:38:29,599 I can see a difference in him, I really can, it's... 611 00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:31,560 ..it's, er, it's quite apparent. 612 00:38:32,760 --> 00:38:34,839 And the chemo could give him another year, 613 00:38:34,840 --> 00:38:36,919 I don't know, maybe, maybe two. 614 00:38:36,920 --> 00:38:38,440 So... yeah... 615 00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:41,680 ..I'd settle for that. 616 00:38:43,680 --> 00:38:46,239 This is the place. 617 00:38:46,240 --> 00:38:48,319 We can do drinks in the drawing room... 618 00:38:48,320 --> 00:38:51,439 ..do the vows and eat through there. 619 00:38:51,440 --> 00:38:53,319 Just a buffet, though, Tully won't 620 00:38:53,320 --> 00:38:54,759 want any sit-downy shit. 621 00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:57,199 Then he can eat or not. 622 00:38:57,200 --> 00:38:59,079 And music - 623 00:38:59,080 --> 00:39:01,119 that's Tully's bit. 624 00:39:01,120 --> 00:39:03,639 And I want photographs, loads of Tully - 625 00:39:03,640 --> 00:39:06,320 not formal though, just, just candid. 626 00:39:08,240 --> 00:39:11,879 Thank you... for this. 627 00:39:11,880 --> 00:39:13,319 It's nothing. 628 00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:14,560 It's everything. 629 00:39:15,920 --> 00:39:18,559 He's always relied on you, hasn't he? 630 00:39:18,560 --> 00:39:20,280 We relied on each other. 631 00:39:21,200 --> 00:39:23,159 He took care of me. 632 00:39:23,160 --> 00:39:26,799 He said it was all music and comedy. 633 00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:28,879 And a few films. 634 00:39:28,880 --> 00:39:30,999 Now it's all silence and death. 635 00:39:31,000 --> 00:39:32,639 Hey. 636 00:39:32,640 --> 00:39:35,799 It's not Tully when he snaps at you like that, he's just frustrated. 637 00:39:35,800 --> 00:39:37,519 I know, I know. 638 00:39:37,520 --> 00:39:39,319 And I'm OK with that, 639 00:39:39,320 --> 00:39:41,519 as long as he keep's doing the chemo, we've still, 640 00:39:41,520 --> 00:39:43,159 still got a chance. 641 00:39:43,160 --> 00:39:46,319 We've just need to hold our nerve. 642 00:39:46,320 --> 00:39:49,040 Hey, let's have another look around. 643 00:39:57,920 --> 00:40:00,400 MUSIC: Totally Wired 644 00:40:02,240 --> 00:40:03,559 Get tae! 645 00:40:03,560 --> 00:40:06,199 These babies are mine! 646 00:40:06,200 --> 00:40:08,279 Jesus. 647 00:40:08,280 --> 00:40:10,799 Whatever you're on, can we have some?! 648 00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:12,279 Steroids! 649 00:40:12,280 --> 00:40:13,799 Who knew? 650 00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:18,199 Dexamethasone AKA Dexy's Midnight Madness! 651 00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:20,679 Who knew?! 652 00:40:20,680 --> 00:40:22,279 Drop your bag, come on! 653 00:40:22,280 --> 00:40:23,559 Get involved! 654 00:40:23,560 --> 00:40:25,240 I'm totally wired! 655 00:40:39,920 --> 00:40:41,879 Well, you look better. 656 00:40:41,880 --> 00:40:44,280 I'm on Class A drugs, Noodles. 657 00:40:45,720 --> 00:40:48,359 But we know there's always a come down, don't we? 658 00:40:48,360 --> 00:40:50,480 Nothing's changed, pal, nothing. 659 00:40:53,800 --> 00:40:55,999 Crossed a lot of stuff off. 660 00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:58,639 Your future bride and I are a well-oiled machine. 661 00:40:58,640 --> 00:41:01,559 Though, why we need posh cars is beyond me. 662 00:41:01,560 --> 00:41:02,799 To get us there, 663 00:41:02,800 --> 00:41:04,279 unless you want to get the bus. 664 00:41:04,280 --> 00:41:05,840 Happily. 665 00:41:09,760 --> 00:41:11,520 This place has changed, eh? 666 00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:16,359 Yep. 667 00:41:16,360 --> 00:41:19,159 Old Woodbine wore a very particular 668 00:41:19,160 --> 00:41:21,560 groove in these floorboards. 669 00:41:35,160 --> 00:41:37,400 Woodbine took his shame out on us. 670 00:41:38,760 --> 00:41:40,240 My dad did the same. 671 00:41:42,600 --> 00:41:44,280 All the reluctant fathers. 672 00:41:46,600 --> 00:41:48,200 Shit. 673 00:41:49,200 --> 00:41:52,119 Why didn't I call my band that? 674 00:41:52,120 --> 00:41:54,639 Eh? 675 00:41:54,640 --> 00:41:56,720 That's a great name for a band. 676 00:42:10,480 --> 00:42:12,759 I can't believe Anna's going along with Switzerland. 677 00:42:12,760 --> 00:42:16,119 It's against everything she believes in. 678 00:42:16,120 --> 00:42:17,599 She doesn't know, 679 00:42:17,600 --> 00:42:20,159 not yet. 680 00:42:20,160 --> 00:42:21,719 For fuck's sake. 681 00:42:21,720 --> 00:42:23,519 I know. 682 00:42:23,520 --> 00:42:26,079 I know. 683 00:42:26,080 --> 00:42:28,240 It's illegal, you could get arrested. 684 00:42:30,080 --> 00:42:33,200 Jimmy, he's asking you to help him kill himself. 685 00:42:35,840 --> 00:42:39,479 Imagine how you'll feel, after, when it's over. 686 00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:41,000 You'd have to live with it... 687 00:42:42,040 --> 00:42:45,519 ..knowing you were the one that took him there. 688 00:42:45,520 --> 00:42:49,479 She'll never forgive you - either of you. 689 00:42:49,480 --> 00:42:51,040 You can't. 690 00:42:52,400 --> 00:42:54,599 It'll break her heart. 691 00:42:54,600 --> 00:42:56,360 Her heart is going to break either way. 692 00:42:59,560 --> 00:43:00,920 He's my friend. 693 00:43:03,800 --> 00:43:06,560 But Anna's going to be his wife on Saturday. 694 00:43:09,200 --> 00:43:10,680 Would he do it for you? 695 00:43:13,200 --> 00:43:14,840 Without hesitation. 696 00:43:19,840 --> 00:43:21,520 I don't care. 697 00:43:23,360 --> 00:43:25,199 You can't. 698 00:43:25,200 --> 00:43:26,519 You can't. 699 00:43:26,520 --> 00:43:27,759 I've said no. 700 00:43:27,760 --> 00:43:29,720 Good. 701 00:43:36,560 --> 00:43:37,879 I'm getting out. 702 00:43:37,880 --> 00:43:39,759 I'm getting the fuck out! 703 00:43:39,760 --> 00:43:41,599 Strathclyde University - 704 00:43:41,600 --> 00:43:43,439 English and Russian. 705 00:43:43,440 --> 00:43:45,559 Guess Susan did the business then? 706 00:43:45,560 --> 00:43:47,199 It was you and Barbara too, 707 00:43:47,200 --> 00:43:51,839 letting me stay at yours and making me study - all of it. 708 00:43:51,840 --> 00:43:55,239 Thanks. I owe you everything, Tully. 709 00:43:55,240 --> 00:43:57,720 Shut it, weirdo. 710 00:44:13,600 --> 00:44:14,959 I gather you got a place. 711 00:44:14,960 --> 00:44:16,599 Strathclyde, English and Russian. 712 00:44:16,600 --> 00:44:18,479 Oh, that is grand. 713 00:44:18,480 --> 00:44:19,599 Susan. 714 00:44:19,600 --> 00:44:21,280 Mrs O'Connor to you! 715 00:44:22,440 --> 00:44:24,279 You don't have to say anything. 716 00:44:24,280 --> 00:44:25,639 It's all good. 717 00:44:25,640 --> 00:44:27,839 Now, go and do not come back, 718 00:44:27,840 --> 00:44:29,200 you hear me? 719 00:44:30,920 --> 00:44:32,839 She had two brothers, you know? 720 00:44:32,840 --> 00:44:33,999 Who did? 721 00:44:34,000 --> 00:44:35,839 Edith Sitwell, you know, the one 722 00:44:35,840 --> 00:44:37,759 with the long nose and the rings? 723 00:44:37,760 --> 00:44:40,439 They were called Osbert and Sacheverell. 724 00:44:40,440 --> 00:44:42,880 Sacheverall, your tea's ready! 725 00:44:57,960 --> 00:45:00,159 Noodles! 726 00:45:00,160 --> 00:45:02,639 We're going to celebrate your great escape. 727 00:45:02,640 --> 00:45:04,239 Now, we can go and see these Neds at 728 00:45:04,240 --> 00:45:06,199 the Barrowlands playing for 15 minutes 729 00:45:06,200 --> 00:45:08,079 with their backs to the fucking audience, 730 00:45:08,080 --> 00:45:11,359 or we can go to Manchester for the best gig in fucking history. 731 00:45:11,360 --> 00:45:14,039 The Shop Assistants at The Workshop on the Friday. 732 00:45:14,040 --> 00:45:16,719 Then on Saturday, New Order, The Smiths, 733 00:45:16,720 --> 00:45:18,479 The Fall, and the fucking rest. 734 00:45:18,480 --> 00:45:20,239 If we miss this, we might as well be dead. 735 00:45:20,240 --> 00:45:21,799 We're going to Manchester, 736 00:45:21,800 --> 00:45:23,399 you, me, Limbo, Tibbs and Hogg, 737 00:45:23,400 --> 00:45:25,039 the Ayrshire boys. 738 00:45:25,040 --> 00:45:26,279 Manchester, come the fuck on! 739 00:45:26,280 --> 00:45:28,359 The land of Ian Curtis and Shelagh Delaney. 740 00:45:28,360 --> 00:45:31,159 Wait. Right, pick one. 741 00:45:31,160 --> 00:45:32,999 Noodles... 742 00:45:33,000 --> 00:45:34,480 ..it's a present... 743 00:45:35,480 --> 00:45:38,160 ..for passing your exams and getting out. 744 00:45:48,560 --> 00:45:50,479 Come on, let's go to Limbo's flat! 745 00:45:50,480 --> 00:45:52,439 Woo! 746 00:45:52,440 --> 00:45:54,720 CHANTING: England's getting rode! 747 00:45:55,760 --> 00:45:59,080 ALL REPEAT: England's getting rode! 748 00:46:08,840 --> 00:46:10,359 You bored, Davie? 749 00:46:10,360 --> 00:46:14,560 I'm making something monumental. 750 00:46:18,640 --> 00:46:20,639 We need a plan for when we get off the bus. 751 00:46:20,640 --> 00:46:22,319 Noodles, make a list. 752 00:46:22,320 --> 00:46:24,279 First, we head to the best record 753 00:46:24,280 --> 00:46:26,919 shop in the history of record shops, straight there. 754 00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:29,199 Straight there, record shop, beers. 755 00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:30,639 Grub on the way to The Workshop, 756 00:46:30,640 --> 00:46:33,239 then Shop Assistants. Don't know where we'll sleep. 757 00:46:33,240 --> 00:46:35,119 Then Saturday... Go round the shops? 758 00:46:35,120 --> 00:46:37,079 Fuck the shops, we see Manchester 759 00:46:37,080 --> 00:46:38,399 in all its majesty. 760 00:46:38,400 --> 00:46:40,999 Then the festival, the best time anyone's ever had. 761 00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:42,319 Then the Hacienda. 762 00:46:42,320 --> 00:46:44,839 Then we lie down... 763 00:46:44,840 --> 00:46:46,639 ..and then we die. 764 00:46:46,640 --> 00:46:47,999 Where do you wash, Limbo? 765 00:46:48,000 --> 00:46:49,559 I go to the baths every day. 766 00:46:49,560 --> 00:46:52,159 You swim every day? I don't swim. 767 00:46:52,160 --> 00:46:53,519 If God had meant me to swim, 768 00:46:53,520 --> 00:46:56,599 he'd have given me the shoulders and buttocks of Mark Spitz. 769 00:46:56,600 --> 00:46:58,599 I'll need to be numb to survive this night. 770 00:46:58,600 --> 00:47:00,519 Please make full use of all the facilities. 771 00:47:00,520 --> 00:47:04,199 Mi casa es su casa. 772 00:47:04,200 --> 00:47:05,639 There's only one rule. 773 00:47:05,640 --> 00:47:07,079 If anybody draws a cock and balls 774 00:47:07,080 --> 00:47:08,519 on my forehead when I'm asleep, 775 00:47:08,520 --> 00:47:09,799 I'll fucking kill them! 776 00:47:09,800 --> 00:47:12,079 STRANGE CRASH 777 00:47:12,080 --> 00:47:14,040 What the fuck is Hogg doing? 778 00:47:19,560 --> 00:47:22,039 I'm the Jackson of Pollok. 779 00:47:22,040 --> 00:47:24,240 You're the Prick of Pollok. 780 00:47:26,920 --> 00:47:29,480 MUSIC: Age of Consent 781 00:47:39,840 --> 00:47:43,159 It's the burning embers of British Imperialism, 782 00:47:43,160 --> 00:47:44,639 so fuck the Commonwealth Games. 783 00:47:44,640 --> 00:47:46,959 We need sanctions and a boycott. 784 00:47:46,960 --> 00:47:48,479 That'll be bad for Edinburgh. 785 00:47:48,480 --> 00:47:49,639 How old are you, 50? 786 00:47:49,640 --> 00:47:51,239 Just cos you drive a poser mobile. 787 00:47:51,240 --> 00:47:52,559 It's a silver Capri. 788 00:47:52,560 --> 00:47:54,200 It's a dick mobile. 789 00:48:00,320 --> 00:48:01,639 You all right, Tullygarven? 790 00:48:01,640 --> 00:48:04,279 Aye, just pacing myself. 791 00:48:04,280 --> 00:48:06,360 This won't be our last big weekend. 792 00:48:08,120 --> 00:48:10,600 Limbo's right, Hogg, you drive a shagging wagon. 793 00:48:28,000 --> 00:48:30,919 Did the Prick of Pollok ever get back to you? 794 00:48:30,920 --> 00:48:33,079 Nope. Didn't reply to the invite. 795 00:48:33,080 --> 00:48:35,399 His loss. 796 00:48:35,400 --> 00:48:38,079 You scrub up well but you still can't do a tie. 797 00:48:38,080 --> 00:48:40,199 It's only a wedding. Sort yourself out, mate. 798 00:48:40,200 --> 00:48:43,000 What is this, Queer Eye? 799 00:48:46,680 --> 00:48:48,519 You OK? 800 00:48:48,520 --> 00:48:50,759 I've never felt better. 801 00:48:50,760 --> 00:48:53,040 It's going to be perfect. 802 00:48:55,160 --> 00:48:58,199 How's it going, all right? 803 00:48:58,200 --> 00:49:01,079 Well, you look incredible. 804 00:49:01,080 --> 00:49:02,720 So do you. 805 00:49:08,720 --> 00:49:11,479 This is going to be hard. 806 00:49:11,480 --> 00:49:12,880 Yeah. 807 00:49:14,600 --> 00:49:16,040 Come on. 808 00:49:25,000 --> 00:49:27,320 You all right? You all right? 809 00:49:30,200 --> 00:49:32,559 Give a kiss. 810 00:49:32,560 --> 00:49:34,480 I love you. I love you. 811 00:49:47,560 --> 00:49:49,600 Thought you said you were fine? 812 00:49:51,760 --> 00:49:53,800 That's what you wanted me to say. 813 00:49:57,400 --> 00:50:00,200 This isn't getting any better any time soon, Jimmy... 814 00:50:02,240 --> 00:50:05,439 ..no matter how much you and Anna wish it. 815 00:50:05,440 --> 00:50:08,160 MUSIC: Pearly Dewdrops 816 00:50:33,640 --> 00:50:35,319 Hello, you. 817 00:50:35,320 --> 00:50:37,640 Hello. Hello, you. 818 00:50:39,240 --> 00:50:41,479 I know this might feel like a wedding, 819 00:50:41,480 --> 00:50:43,359 but, in fact, it's a convention 820 00:50:43,360 --> 00:50:44,959 for all the poor fuckers who've 821 00:50:44,960 --> 00:50:46,639 had their lives blighted by the 822 00:50:46,640 --> 00:50:49,639 madness of Tully Dawson. Come on. 823 00:50:49,640 --> 00:50:53,159 We're missing a couple of those poor unfortunates tonight, 824 00:50:53,160 --> 00:50:54,959 but they're with us in spirit. 825 00:50:54,960 --> 00:50:57,919 A lot of spirits. 826 00:50:57,920 --> 00:50:59,479 Show us your arse! 827 00:50:59,480 --> 00:51:01,759 That's the encore, Tibbs. 828 00:51:01,760 --> 00:51:03,519 So, Tully Dawson, 829 00:51:03,520 --> 00:51:05,239 we all know he's this big and 830 00:51:05,240 --> 00:51:09,719 annoyingly, ridiculously handsome bastard. 831 00:51:09,720 --> 00:51:13,280 He's a unique mix of Carrot Top and Rob Lowe. 832 00:51:16,720 --> 00:51:19,359 Some people are just stars... 833 00:51:19,360 --> 00:51:21,879 ..and Tully Dawson's the brightest. 834 00:51:21,880 --> 00:51:24,479 He's given me some of the biggest laughs of my whole life 835 00:51:24,480 --> 00:51:27,639 and I know that might sound like a small thing... 836 00:51:27,640 --> 00:51:29,919 ..but it's fucking huge. 837 00:51:29,920 --> 00:51:32,119 There's nothing greater, 838 00:51:32,120 --> 00:51:34,160 so I want to thank him for that. 839 00:51:35,360 --> 00:51:37,479 Anna. 840 00:51:37,480 --> 00:51:40,919 Anna, she's the one we really have to thank. 841 00:51:40,920 --> 00:51:43,239 She's gorgeous, wise, 842 00:51:43,240 --> 00:51:46,279 smart, bossy. Oi. Oi. 843 00:51:46,280 --> 00:51:49,199 But, most of all, she puts up with Tully's nonsense. 844 00:51:49,200 --> 00:51:50,879 In fact... 845 00:51:50,880 --> 00:51:53,159 ..she's put with all our nonsense. 846 00:51:53,160 --> 00:51:54,639 And she's loved Tully like no 847 00:51:54,640 --> 00:51:58,800 person could ever hope to be loved in their whole lifetime. 848 00:52:05,080 --> 00:52:07,999 Right, let the dancing commence! 849 00:52:08,000 --> 00:52:10,519 ALL CHEER 850 00:52:10,520 --> 00:52:13,080 MUSIC: Street Fighter 851 00:52:42,080 --> 00:52:44,439 I once applied to Napier to study journalism, 852 00:52:44,440 --> 00:52:46,159 did you know that? 853 00:52:46,160 --> 00:52:49,679 They asked me to suggest a title for a column and I did - 854 00:52:49,680 --> 00:52:52,239 "Britain Is A Ropey Old Cow" - 855 00:52:52,240 --> 00:52:55,959 and I proceeded to dictate aforementioned column. 856 00:52:55,960 --> 00:52:57,879 British Steel is dead, British coal is dead, 857 00:52:57,880 --> 00:52:59,239 British rail is dead. 858 00:52:59,240 --> 00:53:00,759 Ergo... 859 00:53:00,760 --> 00:53:02,719 ..Britain is a ropey old cow. 860 00:53:02,720 --> 00:53:05,399 And then... 861 00:53:05,400 --> 00:53:07,480 ..I mooed. 862 00:53:14,200 --> 00:53:15,680 Never change. 863 00:53:18,200 --> 00:53:19,959 Ah. 864 00:53:19,960 --> 00:53:21,839 It's weird, innit? 865 00:53:21,840 --> 00:53:23,240 No Limbo. 866 00:53:24,440 --> 00:53:26,439 I think about him a lot, 867 00:53:26,440 --> 00:53:28,839 in that flat... 868 00:53:28,840 --> 00:53:31,320 ..a halo of white powder, all alone. 869 00:53:34,440 --> 00:53:36,280 Nobody should die alone. 870 00:53:38,400 --> 00:53:40,239 Fuck me... 871 00:53:40,240 --> 00:53:41,760 ..is that Hogg? 872 00:53:45,240 --> 00:53:47,239 Fuck, it is. 873 00:53:47,240 --> 00:53:49,039 Jimmy. Hogg. 874 00:53:49,040 --> 00:53:51,559 Tibbs. Hogg. 875 00:53:51,560 --> 00:53:53,239 You never replied to your invitation. 876 00:53:53,240 --> 00:53:54,719 No, I'm sorry I didn't, 877 00:53:54,720 --> 00:53:56,679 but, you know... 878 00:53:56,680 --> 00:53:59,079 ..I couldn't not come. 879 00:53:59,080 --> 00:54:01,439 Is it true, that you've got six wains and three ex-wives? 880 00:54:01,440 --> 00:54:03,480 Three wains and six ex-wives. 881 00:54:05,280 --> 00:54:07,159 Manchester... 882 00:54:07,160 --> 00:54:09,599 ..that must have been the last time we were all together. 883 00:54:09,600 --> 00:54:11,520 Didn't I try and batter you? 884 00:54:12,720 --> 00:54:15,879 You're just children. 885 00:54:15,880 --> 00:54:17,359 Manchester? 886 00:54:17,360 --> 00:54:18,440 Transmission. 887 00:54:19,560 --> 00:54:20,880 The festival. 888 00:54:22,280 --> 00:54:23,800 I don't remember. 889 00:54:25,720 --> 00:54:27,079 Tully. 890 00:54:27,080 --> 00:54:28,319 Oh, ho, ho! He made it. 891 00:54:28,320 --> 00:54:30,000 Good to see you. You, too. 892 00:54:31,920 --> 00:54:33,839 Thought I would pop in, say hello. 893 00:54:33,840 --> 00:54:35,799 And wave cheerio? 894 00:54:35,800 --> 00:54:38,159 Tibbs, take Hogg and get him arseholed, will you? 895 00:54:38,160 --> 00:54:40,439 Come on, son, let's get on it. 896 00:54:40,440 --> 00:54:42,240 Don't let him near any paint. 897 00:54:46,800 --> 00:54:49,160 Do you ever miss Iona when she's on tour? 898 00:54:52,640 --> 00:54:54,479 There's one good thing, 899 00:54:54,480 --> 00:54:57,799 I won't miss Anna because I won't exist. 900 00:54:57,800 --> 00:55:01,120 It's you poor fuckers that'll do all the missing. 901 00:55:02,320 --> 00:55:04,119 Thank you for today. 902 00:55:04,120 --> 00:55:06,919 You've done us proud. 903 00:55:06,920 --> 00:55:08,680 I won't forget it as long as I live. 904 00:55:11,400 --> 00:55:13,240 You know what I mean. 905 00:55:17,600 --> 00:55:22,079 I don't want you to feel bad about Switzerland, Noodles, I get it. 906 00:55:22,080 --> 00:55:24,080 It doesn't change anything between us. 907 00:55:27,000 --> 00:55:29,680 Fiona said it was asking too much of you. 908 00:55:33,400 --> 00:55:35,280 She's very wise, my sister. 909 00:55:37,400 --> 00:55:39,040 Why did you ask me? 910 00:55:46,520 --> 00:55:48,560 I needed you to say it was OK. 911 00:55:53,720 --> 00:55:55,240 Is it OK?