1 00:00:14,290 --> 00:00:16,082 Woman: Tavi, I can't believe you just did that. 2 00:00:16,165 --> 00:00:18,207 Tavi: Well, he-- I told you! (slaps) 3 00:00:18,290 --> 00:00:20,123 Stacy: All right, forget it. We're going. 4 00:00:20,207 --> 00:00:21,873 Come on, Elexa, let's go. 5 00:00:21,957 --> 00:00:23,748 (girl crying) 6 00:00:23,831 --> 00:00:25,165 Woman: You have to maintain yourself. 7 00:00:25,249 --> 00:00:27,332 Tavi: Don't ever bring your son here. 8 00:00:27,415 --> 00:00:28,915 (crying continues) 9 00:00:28,998 --> 00:00:30,374 Shut up! (crying) 10 00:00:30,457 --> 00:00:32,415 Hey! I'm upset! I'm upset! 11 00:00:32,499 --> 00:00:34,831 I don't care! You don't hit her! 12 00:00:34,915 --> 00:00:37,665 Really! No, 'cause you don't know what the fuck is why! 13 00:00:37,748 --> 00:00:39,540 Damn it! Stop it! 14 00:00:39,623 --> 00:00:41,499 (crying continues) Stop! 15 00:00:41,581 --> 00:00:43,374 Now! Ow. Stop. 16 00:00:43,457 --> 00:00:45,457 'Cause I'm not in a good mood... Okay! 17 00:00:45,540 --> 00:00:47,623 ...is the hell why. (screams) 18 00:00:47,706 --> 00:00:49,290 Stop! Stop. 19 00:00:49,374 --> 00:00:51,082 Oh my God. Elexa! 20 00:00:51,165 --> 00:00:53,957 Damn it, Ethan, knock it-- knock it off now. Now! 21 00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:57,540 No, don't. No, Ethan! Why don't you guys get the fuck outta here, dumbass! 22 00:00:57,623 --> 00:01:00,082 I'll kick your ass! Shh! God damn it. Stop. 23 00:01:00,165 --> 00:01:01,790 Stacy: ...hit the chair with? Ethan: Shut up! 24 00:01:01,873 --> 00:01:03,123 (Elexa crying) 25 00:01:03,207 --> 00:01:05,123 Stacy: What did you do that for? 26 00:01:05,207 --> 00:01:06,915 Stop! Ethan: I'm upset! 27 00:01:06,998 --> 00:01:09,082 Okay. You can be angry at Uncle Tavi. 28 00:01:09,165 --> 00:01:11,623 You don't need to be angry at Elexa. 29 00:01:11,706 --> 00:01:13,790 Ethan: Because I'm not in a fricking asshole mood. 30 00:01:13,873 --> 00:01:15,207 Stacy: Okay, but she didn't do anything-- 31 00:01:15,290 --> 00:01:16,998 Ethan: I'm not in a fricking asshole mood! 32 00:01:17,082 --> 00:01:18,165 (crying) 33 00:01:22,207 --> 00:01:24,249 ♪ ♪ 34 00:01:31,082 --> 00:01:34,415 (whines) 35 00:01:36,499 --> 00:01:40,581 (crying) 36 00:01:57,040 --> 00:02:00,915 Liza Long: I'd been trying for years to get help for my son. 37 00:02:01,915 --> 00:02:04,207 I... I was desperate, 38 00:02:04,290 --> 00:02:07,665 and I thought I was the only mother in the entire world 39 00:02:07,748 --> 00:02:10,290 who felt the way I did, the only mom. 40 00:02:10,374 --> 00:02:12,581 How can I not get my child help? 41 00:02:12,665 --> 00:02:13,873 Surely all the other mothers 42 00:02:13,957 --> 00:02:15,415 are getting their child help. 43 00:02:15,499 --> 00:02:17,831 Why not me? What's wrong with me? 44 00:02:21,706 --> 00:02:23,415 Creigh Deeds: You know, I used to worry that-- 45 00:02:23,499 --> 00:02:27,374 that Gus was gonna wind up at a jail or a hospital 46 00:02:27,457 --> 00:02:29,790 or-- or homeless. 47 00:02:29,873 --> 00:02:33,123 Um, all of those would be preferable 48 00:02:33,207 --> 00:02:35,123 to the situation I'm in now. 49 00:02:36,207 --> 00:02:39,040 If a state senator, 50 00:02:39,123 --> 00:02:40,790 um, someone who's run for governor, 51 00:02:40,873 --> 00:02:44,374 whose name's been in every paper of the commonwealth-- 52 00:02:44,457 --> 00:02:46,040 if I can't get the help, 53 00:02:46,123 --> 00:02:49,998 what does that say about ordinary people? 54 00:02:50,082 --> 00:02:53,332 We don't treat mental illness the way we treat other diseases, 55 00:02:53,415 --> 00:02:55,873 and so the care is just not available. 56 00:02:55,957 --> 00:02:59,873 (Elexa crying) 57 00:03:04,915 --> 00:03:06,998 (crying continues) Stacy: All right. 58 00:03:07,082 --> 00:03:09,415 Thomas Insel: Somebody once said that a serious mental illness 59 00:03:09,499 --> 00:03:12,748 is any mental illness that affects somebody you love. 60 00:03:12,831 --> 00:03:14,831 And in a way, there's something to that. 61 00:03:14,915 --> 00:03:18,665 ♪ ♪ 62 00:03:21,581 --> 00:03:23,123 I'm not in a good mood! 63 00:03:23,207 --> 00:03:26,915 Thomas: For people who have serious mental illness and who are not treated, 64 00:03:26,998 --> 00:03:28,332 there's a tendency to violence, 65 00:03:28,415 --> 00:03:31,249 especially towards the people that they're closest to 66 00:03:31,332 --> 00:03:33,831 and, most of all, towards themselves. 67 00:03:35,581 --> 00:03:39,123 And only about half of the children who have a mental disorder 68 00:03:39,207 --> 00:03:42,290 are going to receive any kind of care whatsoever. 69 00:03:42,374 --> 00:03:46,415 ♪ ♪ 70 00:03:54,873 --> 00:03:56,706 (rain pattering) 71 00:04:06,665 --> 00:04:09,915 All I get is people that want to just sit there and lecture me. 72 00:04:09,998 --> 00:04:13,374 I need to do this. "Do you understand that your son's gonna do this 73 00:04:13,457 --> 00:04:15,332 and that your son is this way? Do you understand?" 74 00:04:15,415 --> 00:04:17,374 As if I'm in denial of something, 75 00:04:17,457 --> 00:04:21,831 as if I might be able to get some extra help, but I'm just not wanting to. 76 00:04:21,915 --> 00:04:25,790 And it is so frustrating and so exhausting. 77 00:04:27,374 --> 00:04:29,998 I can only stick to my guns so far, Tavi, 78 00:04:30,082 --> 00:04:31,540 because it becomes too dangerous, 79 00:04:31,623 --> 00:04:35,915 and that is why you're right. Giving in to him in the end-- in the end 80 00:04:35,998 --> 00:04:39,332 isn't the best idea, because it does make him more manipulative 81 00:04:39,415 --> 00:04:43,748 and more worse. Yes, but not giving into him when he's really persistent 82 00:04:43,831 --> 00:04:45,207 is also just as dangerous. 83 00:04:45,290 --> 00:04:47,665 And that is why the behaviorist already said 84 00:04:47,748 --> 00:04:49,831 that he doesn't believe that-- anything I can do at this point, 85 00:04:49,915 --> 00:04:51,581 he doesn't believe there are any consequence-- 86 00:04:51,665 --> 00:04:54,998 he doesn't believe I can do anything, myself, at this point. 87 00:04:57,790 --> 00:04:59,957 You think that-- Tavi, you think that, 88 00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:03,040 but I hate to say it, you think that, but it isn't same. 89 00:05:03,123 --> 00:05:05,748 You can train a dog easier that a child like this. 90 00:05:05,831 --> 00:05:06,831 (scoffs) 91 00:05:08,207 --> 00:05:10,040 Stacy: When he started being aggressive, 92 00:05:10,123 --> 00:05:13,207 he was only about two and a half, three. I was worried then. 93 00:05:13,290 --> 00:05:17,082 You ask a doctor, they can't tell you what he'll be capable of. 94 00:05:17,165 --> 00:05:20,581 They don't know where he's gonna go or what direction he's gonna take. 95 00:05:23,374 --> 00:05:25,957 (sighs) I just can't help myself, 'cause... 96 00:05:26,957 --> 00:05:29,040 it's just what I usually do. 97 00:05:29,123 --> 00:05:31,290 I don't know how to control my anger. 98 00:05:34,831 --> 00:05:37,332 (mumbles) Gosh, only if someone was a lifeguard. 99 00:05:39,665 --> 00:05:40,873 Man: What'd you say? 100 00:05:40,957 --> 00:05:43,998 I said if only there was a lifeguard who could... 101 00:05:45,207 --> 00:05:46,207 help me... 102 00:05:47,332 --> 00:05:48,915 try to control myself. 103 00:05:48,998 --> 00:05:52,374 'Cause you know lifeguards are good, right? 104 00:05:52,457 --> 00:05:55,665 Yeah, they save everyone, even when they drown. 105 00:05:57,249 --> 00:05:59,123 ♪ ♪ 106 00:05:59,207 --> 00:06:01,290 (kids chattering) 107 00:06:01,374 --> 00:06:02,374 Boy: No. 108 00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:22,290 Cora: Vontae is 12. 109 00:06:22,374 --> 00:06:24,748 Well, he'll be 12 in October. 110 00:06:24,831 --> 00:06:26,623 (gunfire) 111 00:06:26,706 --> 00:06:29,623 Cora: In the beginning, he was talking about he just wanted to die. 112 00:06:29,706 --> 00:06:33,623 Now he's talking about hurting other people. 113 00:06:33,706 --> 00:06:35,374 He don't express himself verbally, 114 00:06:35,457 --> 00:06:38,374 but he's real good expressing himself at writing. 115 00:06:38,457 --> 00:06:41,207 So if he gets upset, and I'll go in the room 116 00:06:41,290 --> 00:06:43,665 and I'll see all these signs all over the bed-- 117 00:06:43,748 --> 00:06:47,457 "I hate myself," "I can't control myself," 118 00:06:47,540 --> 00:06:50,831 and just stuff like, "I'm no good," 119 00:06:50,915 --> 00:06:55,123 and "I'm better off dead," and stuff like that. 120 00:06:55,207 --> 00:06:57,706 I don't never take stuff like that as just talk. 121 00:06:57,790 --> 00:07:02,415 I feel like if it's in you and you saying it, then it's a possibility. 122 00:07:02,499 --> 00:07:04,040 That's how I feel. 123 00:07:04,123 --> 00:07:06,665 'Cause why would you say something like that? 124 00:07:06,748 --> 00:07:08,748 ♪ ♪ 125 00:07:12,706 --> 00:07:15,332 I'm just doing my part on my end 126 00:07:15,415 --> 00:07:18,123 to make sure he knows that I love him 127 00:07:18,207 --> 00:07:20,540 and to know that I'm there for him. 128 00:07:23,581 --> 00:07:26,998 ♪ ♪ 129 00:07:27,082 --> 00:07:29,207 At the time of the school shootings, 130 00:07:29,290 --> 00:07:32,790 my son had been in an acute care psychiatric hospital for two days. 131 00:07:32,873 --> 00:07:36,332 Newswoman: It is the scene of one of the worst school shootings in the history 132 00:07:36,415 --> 00:07:38,790 of the United States, and we can report to you 133 00:07:38,873 --> 00:07:40,415 that police have now identified 134 00:07:40,499 --> 00:07:43,540 a school shooter as Adam Lanza. 135 00:07:43,623 --> 00:07:45,873 Newswoman 2: Police are trying to determine a motive. 136 00:07:45,957 --> 00:07:47,499 They say the shooter killed his mother, 137 00:07:47,581 --> 00:07:50,457 then broke into Sandy Hook Elementary Friday morning, 138 00:07:50,540 --> 00:07:52,581 killing 20 children and six women 139 00:07:52,665 --> 00:07:54,332 using an assault-style rifle. 140 00:07:54,415 --> 00:07:56,040 Newsman: Even before the shooting, 141 00:07:56,123 --> 00:07:59,457 Adam Lanza, seen here in a photo taken seven years ago, 142 00:07:59,540 --> 00:08:02,499 was known in the neighborhood as a troubled child, 143 00:08:02,581 --> 00:08:04,040 with an overbearing mother. 144 00:08:04,123 --> 00:08:06,040 My son played with him when they were young, 145 00:08:06,123 --> 00:08:10,332 and... in her home, I know she was very particular. 146 00:08:11,581 --> 00:08:13,623 I just think she... 147 00:08:13,706 --> 00:08:17,082 maybe had too high of standards or something. 148 00:08:18,415 --> 00:08:20,040 Liza: That day of Newtown... 149 00:08:21,623 --> 00:08:24,374 something broke. I... 150 00:08:24,457 --> 00:08:27,123 I sat down, and I wrote my truth, 151 00:08:27,207 --> 00:08:31,581 the truth that my family was living-- that I was living-- 152 00:08:31,665 --> 00:08:33,207 that I was afraid of my son. 153 00:08:33,290 --> 00:08:34,915 And the mother of a mentally-ill child 154 00:08:34,998 --> 00:08:37,957 getting backlash for a blog posting with the title, 155 00:08:38,040 --> 00:08:41,623 "I am Adam Lanza's Mother." The post went viral. 156 00:08:41,706 --> 00:08:45,499 In it, Liza Long says her aim was to describe the challenge 157 00:08:45,581 --> 00:08:49,540 or raising a child who she says is seriously disturbed. 158 00:08:49,623 --> 00:08:50,790 Most people with autism 159 00:08:50,873 --> 00:08:52,290 and most people with schizophrenia 160 00:08:52,374 --> 00:08:53,998 are not inherently dangerous, 161 00:08:54,082 --> 00:08:56,082 but we do ourselves a grave disservice 162 00:08:56,165 --> 00:08:58,748 if we deny the fact that some people 163 00:08:58,831 --> 00:09:02,499 in these communities behave in ways that are traumatic, 164 00:09:02,581 --> 00:09:05,665 and I think we need to support their families. 165 00:09:05,748 --> 00:09:07,957 Liza: I knew right where the dialog was gonna go. 166 00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:09,831 They were gonna say, "This was Nancy Lanza's fault. 167 00:09:09,915 --> 00:09:11,374 "Why didn't she get her son help? 168 00:09:11,457 --> 00:09:13,581 Why didn't she this? Why didn't she that?" 169 00:09:13,665 --> 00:09:18,332 But I felt immense empathy for Nancy Lanza. 170 00:09:19,665 --> 00:09:22,457 Andrew: I think people insist on the narrative of blame. 171 00:09:22,540 --> 00:09:24,831 In part, because they want to believe 172 00:09:24,915 --> 00:09:27,374 that these things were caused by poor parenting, 173 00:09:27,457 --> 00:09:29,499 because if it's caused by poor parenting, 174 00:09:29,581 --> 00:09:33,415 then you can know that you're a good parent and it won't happen to you, 175 00:09:33,499 --> 00:09:35,581 and I think that's a false comfort. 176 00:09:38,540 --> 00:09:40,374 Alison: Where is he going? I'm going to the room. 177 00:09:40,457 --> 00:09:42,706 Stacy: Let's go upstairs and play with Ethan. 178 00:09:42,790 --> 00:09:43,831 Stacy: Can you...? Okay. 179 00:09:43,915 --> 00:09:46,332 Alison: You want me to go with you? All right. 180 00:09:46,415 --> 00:09:47,665 Stacy: Elexa, come upstairs. 181 00:09:47,748 --> 00:09:49,499 Murray, out. (clicks tongue) Go. 182 00:09:49,581 --> 00:09:51,790 Murray's a good boy. (Murray whines) 183 00:09:51,873 --> 00:09:53,831 All right, well, then you keep him contained. 184 00:09:53,915 --> 00:09:55,873 You're the good boy. 185 00:09:55,957 --> 00:09:57,207 Alison: You wanna sit down, Ethan? 186 00:09:57,290 --> 00:09:58,457 Really-- he really bothers everyone. 187 00:09:58,540 --> 00:09:59,957 Stacy: No, he's not bothering everybody. 188 00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:02,332 I know, but he-- see-- Elexa: Hi! 189 00:10:02,415 --> 00:10:03,831 Will you just tell Murray to leave? 190 00:10:03,915 --> 00:10:06,290 (rock music plays) Oh my God! 191 00:10:06,374 --> 00:10:08,082 I love this song! 192 00:10:10,290 --> 00:10:13,165 Alison: You like Ozzy? No, I like this song. 193 00:10:13,249 --> 00:10:14,831 What song is this? Alison: It's Ozzy. 194 00:10:14,915 --> 00:10:16,332 No, it's-- Man: Pink Floyd. 195 00:10:16,415 --> 00:10:18,415 Stacy: It's Pink Floyd. I was gonna say this is Pink Floyd. 196 00:10:18,499 --> 00:10:20,540 Alison: Yeah, I was thinking of another song. 197 00:10:20,623 --> 00:10:22,831 Oh yeah, I-I-I-- I love this song. 198 00:10:22,915 --> 00:10:25,831 Alison: Is this Is this Dark Side of the Moon? Seriously, I like this song. 199 00:10:25,915 --> 00:10:28,623 No, not the Dark Side. No, shush, you guys. I like this song. 200 00:10:28,706 --> 00:10:30,706 Alison: She just wants you guys to listen. Shut up. 201 00:10:30,790 --> 00:10:32,873 Elexa: Stop! Stacy: Stop. 202 00:10:32,957 --> 00:10:36,165 Shut up, Elexa! Stacy: Stop. We're not gonna yell. 203 00:10:36,249 --> 00:10:38,165 All right? I hate her! That's why. 204 00:10:38,249 --> 00:10:40,249 Stacy: That's your sister-- Shut up! 205 00:10:40,332 --> 00:10:42,790 Shut up! I will kill you! 206 00:10:42,873 --> 00:10:44,873 Ethan, do you wanna go outside, honey? 207 00:10:44,957 --> 00:10:46,540 Shut up! (women chatter) 208 00:10:46,623 --> 00:10:49,040 God damn it, I will-- I'm gonna-- 209 00:10:49,123 --> 00:10:52,623 I'm gonna fricking punch you, Elexa, if you don't... stop. 210 00:10:52,706 --> 00:10:55,415 No, you stop it! Stop. Now. 211 00:10:55,499 --> 00:10:57,040 Stacy: Elexa. Elexa, move. 212 00:10:57,123 --> 00:10:59,123 Ethan: Whatever! Go! Go! Go! Stacy: Stop. 213 00:10:59,207 --> 00:11:01,998 Stacy: Damn it. Ethan: I don't want to be touched! 214 00:11:02,082 --> 00:11:03,249 (Elexa whimpers) 215 00:11:03,332 --> 00:11:04,748 (sighs) 216 00:11:04,831 --> 00:11:07,040 Stacy: I just can't handle this. 217 00:11:08,623 --> 00:11:09,623 Eth? 218 00:11:12,082 --> 00:11:14,706 (sighs) I don't know what to say. 219 00:11:15,915 --> 00:11:18,706 One wrong word sends me into a psychotic rage 220 00:11:18,790 --> 00:11:20,706 where I've got no control over myself, 221 00:11:20,790 --> 00:11:23,998 and it's like... watching myself... 222 00:11:25,499 --> 00:11:28,082 do things that I didn't want to do. 223 00:11:28,165 --> 00:11:32,457 And then afterwards, I-- I either completely forgot, 224 00:11:32,540 --> 00:11:34,499 like I'd block all the memories, 225 00:11:34,581 --> 00:11:36,915 because it was too painful to remember, 226 00:11:36,998 --> 00:11:40,290 or I would remember and that would be even more painful, 227 00:11:40,374 --> 00:11:44,581 because I would have memories of myself doing it, 228 00:11:44,665 --> 00:11:47,957 even though I didn't want to, even though I had no control, 229 00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:50,623 I still accused myself of doing it. 230 00:11:50,706 --> 00:11:53,706 (channels switching) 231 00:11:53,790 --> 00:11:55,790 There's just been countless episodes with him, 232 00:11:55,873 --> 00:11:59,082 and I just see, uh, the anger and the, um... 233 00:12:00,499 --> 00:12:03,040 the violence getting progressively worse. 234 00:12:03,123 --> 00:12:05,790 Can he turn to family? Well, sure, 235 00:12:05,873 --> 00:12:07,957 but when he acts like that, no. 236 00:12:08,040 --> 00:12:10,957 I can't have my child exposed to that, 237 00:12:11,040 --> 00:12:13,457 and I have to be protective of my child. 238 00:12:13,540 --> 00:12:16,040 I think my-- my nephew needs professional help. 239 00:12:16,123 --> 00:12:19,915 I don't even know if it's anything Stacy can do anymore. 240 00:12:19,998 --> 00:12:21,457 I can't keep defending him. 241 00:12:21,540 --> 00:12:23,540 I can't-- I can defend him so far, 242 00:12:23,623 --> 00:12:25,374 but I can't expect the rest of the world 243 00:12:25,457 --> 00:12:28,957 to not get upset or just forgive him or just deal with it. 244 00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:31,665 I can't expect that, I never did. 245 00:12:31,748 --> 00:12:34,165 He constantly threatens he's going to kill somebody, 246 00:12:34,249 --> 00:12:37,207 and when people hear that, it sends them into a mode. 247 00:12:37,290 --> 00:12:38,665 You don't know if he's serious. 248 00:12:38,748 --> 00:12:40,665 If somebody comes up to you and gets mad at you 249 00:12:40,748 --> 00:12:42,415 and tells you, "I'm gonna effing kill you. 250 00:12:42,499 --> 00:12:46,499 I'm gonna beat your ass. I'm gonna find a gun and shoot you," 251 00:12:46,581 --> 00:12:48,499 whether he would do it or not, you don't know. 252 00:12:48,581 --> 00:12:50,998 But the fact that somebody would say that to you, 253 00:12:51,082 --> 00:12:53,415 and you're sitting there wondering, "Are they capable of it?" 254 00:12:59,581 --> 00:13:03,082 "Mom! Come here!" 255 00:13:03,165 --> 00:13:05,040 "Hold on!" 256 00:13:05,123 --> 00:13:06,581 "Mom!" 257 00:13:07,665 --> 00:13:09,665 "Be quiet, Ethan!" 258 00:13:09,748 --> 00:13:11,790 "No, you!" (grunts) 259 00:13:13,665 --> 00:13:18,249 And he hits me, and he pulls my hair... 260 00:13:19,665 --> 00:13:21,998 and he kicks me... 261 00:13:23,790 --> 00:13:25,623 and he... 262 00:13:26,581 --> 00:13:27,957 pulls my arm... 263 00:13:29,040 --> 00:13:30,082 to the wall, 264 00:13:30,165 --> 00:13:32,332 and he pushes me to the wall. 265 00:13:33,499 --> 00:13:34,499 And... 266 00:13:36,499 --> 00:13:38,623 he beats me up... 267 00:13:40,332 --> 00:13:41,957 like that. 268 00:13:45,123 --> 00:13:46,499 And one time... 269 00:13:47,581 --> 00:13:51,748 um, Josh, my mom's boyfriend, 270 00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:54,290 he got really mad at him-- 271 00:13:54,374 --> 00:13:58,457 Ethan, he got really mad at him, and so... 272 00:13:59,665 --> 00:14:03,915 um, Josh has guns that he hides only from bad guys, 273 00:14:03,998 --> 00:14:07,207 and Ethan found one, so he picked it up. 274 00:14:07,290 --> 00:14:09,082 And it had no bullets in it, 275 00:14:09,165 --> 00:14:10,831 but he picked it up. 276 00:14:13,665 --> 00:14:15,457 The very last thing that I want to do, 277 00:14:15,540 --> 00:14:17,040 that any parent wants to do, 278 00:14:17,123 --> 00:14:18,623 especially at 10 years old, 279 00:14:18,706 --> 00:14:21,581 is think about or have to put their child in a... 280 00:14:21,665 --> 00:14:23,915 in an institution or in a home, 281 00:14:23,998 --> 00:14:25,082 to give him up. 282 00:14:25,165 --> 00:14:26,415 That's not what I want to do, 283 00:14:26,499 --> 00:14:29,082 but I am at the point, and it is as bad 284 00:14:29,165 --> 00:14:31,207 that if-- if nothing else, 285 00:14:31,290 --> 00:14:32,790 I don't know that I have a choice. 286 00:14:32,873 --> 00:14:34,790 It's becoming more than a safety issue. 287 00:14:34,873 --> 00:14:37,873 I have a daughter. I have to protect her, and I can't. 288 00:14:38,998 --> 00:14:41,040 ♪ ♪ 289 00:15:20,123 --> 00:15:25,040 Creigh: The whole deinstitutionalization process was driven by two things: 290 00:15:25,123 --> 00:15:27,165 One, we wanted to save money, 291 00:15:27,249 --> 00:15:30,998 and, second, we wanted to restore people's civil rights 292 00:15:31,082 --> 00:15:32,581 and treat them in the community. 293 00:15:32,665 --> 00:15:34,790 Well, we closed the institutions down, 294 00:15:34,873 --> 00:15:37,499 but we didn't really adequately follow through 295 00:15:37,581 --> 00:15:40,748 with ensuring that there are adequate supports in the community. 296 00:15:41,873 --> 00:15:43,332 And the problem is we don't-- 297 00:15:43,415 --> 00:15:45,457 we just don't have enough beds right now. 298 00:15:45,540 --> 00:15:48,499 Thomas: We went from about 600,000 beds, 299 00:15:48,581 --> 00:15:51,165 today there are less than 60,000 public beds 300 00:15:51,249 --> 00:15:53,165 for people with serious mental illness. 301 00:15:53,249 --> 00:15:57,915 It's raised the question about, "Does there need to be a new kind of institution?" 302 00:15:57,998 --> 00:16:02,332 Maybe not like the old asylums, but places where 303 00:16:02,415 --> 00:16:06,374 kids, young adults, or even older adults could go for short periods of time 304 00:16:06,457 --> 00:16:07,873 to get more comprehensive care. 305 00:16:07,957 --> 00:16:11,623 I think there aren't enough options available to people. 306 00:16:11,706 --> 00:16:14,623 There is the sense that rehabilitation 307 00:16:14,706 --> 00:16:17,374 is a luxury for people who have a lot of money 308 00:16:17,457 --> 00:16:19,082 or who live in states in which there are 309 00:16:19,165 --> 00:16:22,748 particularly good programs because we have regional networks, 310 00:16:22,831 --> 00:16:24,748 and in some places there's rehabilitation 311 00:16:24,831 --> 00:16:27,123 and in some places there's almost none. 312 00:16:35,499 --> 00:16:36,623 (door closes) 313 00:16:38,998 --> 00:16:44,207 William. This is the first time that I've gotten a chance to meet with you in... 314 00:16:44,290 --> 00:16:47,915 we determined the other day, like since January. Like months. 315 00:16:47,998 --> 00:16:49,374 Yeah, months. 316 00:16:49,457 --> 00:16:52,457 Gosh, you have had a really... 317 00:16:52,540 --> 00:16:54,915 a very busy year, huh? William: Rough time. 318 00:16:54,998 --> 00:16:58,249 It has been a rough time. It's been a really rough time. 319 00:16:58,332 --> 00:17:00,165 Uh-huh. Yeah. 320 00:17:00,249 --> 00:17:01,540 Yeah. Man: And you really wanna get back 321 00:17:01,623 --> 00:17:03,249 to kind of a more normal life, huh? 322 00:17:03,332 --> 00:17:07,123 Yeah. Why can't I? Man: Yeah. 323 00:17:07,207 --> 00:17:09,623 Well, you know what? That's a very good question. Edie: Yeah. 324 00:17:09,706 --> 00:17:12,290 Brian: I met William at the age of 12. 325 00:17:12,374 --> 00:17:14,332 He has a mild intellectual disability, 326 00:17:14,415 --> 00:17:17,748 and also, in addition, a mild autism spectrum disorder. 327 00:17:17,831 --> 00:17:21,082 He's also diagnosed with a schizoaffective disorder, 328 00:17:21,165 --> 00:17:24,499 and that is the condition where he can, 329 00:17:24,581 --> 00:17:26,249 especially when really emotional 330 00:17:26,332 --> 00:17:27,915 and really elevated, and... 331 00:17:29,207 --> 00:17:31,415 well, we also say dysregulated... 332 00:17:32,748 --> 00:17:35,249 he can really start to lose touch with reality 333 00:17:35,332 --> 00:17:38,457 and have some pretty delusional thinking, 334 00:17:38,540 --> 00:17:40,957 can experience auditory hallucinations. 335 00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:46,998 Since January, you've been down to... 336 00:17:47,082 --> 00:17:50,374 William: It was first Children's Hospital, and then Jefferson Hills, 337 00:17:50,457 --> 00:17:52,581 and then Denver Children's Home, 338 00:17:52,665 --> 00:17:54,957 and then Denver Health, and then El Pueblo. 339 00:17:55,040 --> 00:17:57,415 Brian: Wow. That's a lot. (chuckles) 340 00:17:57,499 --> 00:18:00,457 Yeah, that's been a rough time, hasn't it? 341 00:18:00,540 --> 00:18:01,998 Yeah. Brian: Yeah. 342 00:18:02,082 --> 00:18:04,540 Yeah. William: 'Cause I wasn't eating anything at all. 343 00:18:04,623 --> 00:18:07,748 Mm-hmm. I was getting skinny to the point of mal-- 344 00:18:07,831 --> 00:18:10,082 All I was doing was watching my videos, 345 00:18:10,165 --> 00:18:12,957 staying up all night. I was in horrible shape. 346 00:18:13,040 --> 00:18:16,332 By the time I got there, they noticed I was skinny-- 347 00:18:16,415 --> 00:18:19,332 dangerously skinny to the point of malnutrition. 348 00:18:19,415 --> 00:18:21,165 Mm-hmm. What was going on 349 00:18:21,249 --> 00:18:23,915 that made all of those trips to Children's Hospital 350 00:18:23,998 --> 00:18:25,790 and El Pueblo and Denver Children-- 351 00:18:25,873 --> 00:18:28,581 why were all those places necessary? 352 00:18:29,581 --> 00:18:31,665 'Cause my behavior went downhill. 353 00:18:31,748 --> 00:18:33,790 Yeah, what kind of behavior? 354 00:18:35,915 --> 00:18:37,082 Damaging property. 355 00:18:37,165 --> 00:18:39,290 Cops had to come over. Brian: Yeah. 356 00:18:39,374 --> 00:18:42,457 I was constantly kicking and screaming and hitting. 357 00:18:42,540 --> 00:18:44,540 Brian: Yeah. Yeah. 358 00:18:44,623 --> 00:18:47,499 I was scared to death. 359 00:18:47,581 --> 00:18:51,249 We end up calling the police when he is so out of control 360 00:18:51,332 --> 00:18:53,706 that he's not listening to reason anymore 361 00:18:53,790 --> 00:18:56,623 and he's becoming, um... 362 00:18:56,706 --> 00:18:58,581 dangerous to himself or us. 363 00:18:58,665 --> 00:18:59,790 Or his sister. 364 00:18:59,873 --> 00:19:03,540 And so, when he starts throwing lamps 365 00:19:03,623 --> 00:19:05,790 or throwing the TV or things like that, 366 00:19:05,873 --> 00:19:07,123 then we have to call the police. 367 00:19:07,207 --> 00:19:11,040 So, remember when we, um, when we were at Children's? 368 00:19:11,123 --> 00:19:13,665 William: Yeah. And we said from Children's, 369 00:19:13,748 --> 00:19:17,457 we were probably gonna step down to a residential? Yeah. 370 00:19:17,540 --> 00:19:19,873 And then work our way home? Yeah. 371 00:19:19,957 --> 00:19:23,457 So, we started that process when we were at Children's. Yeah. 372 00:19:23,540 --> 00:19:27,249 And when you got out of Children's, the home wasn't ready. 373 00:19:27,332 --> 00:19:30,748 Yeah. It became ready. 374 00:19:30,831 --> 00:19:35,123 What do you mean? That the home that's right before 375 00:19:35,207 --> 00:19:38,831 you staying home with us is ready for you now. 376 00:19:38,915 --> 00:19:40,499 (gasps) Brian: It's available. 377 00:19:40,581 --> 00:19:43,915 And it's-- a good thing. I'm going? 378 00:19:45,332 --> 00:19:47,706 Yeah. It's the best thing for right now. 379 00:19:47,790 --> 00:19:50,748 It's the step down from going to Children's 380 00:19:50,831 --> 00:19:52,831 to staying home... full-time. 381 00:19:52,915 --> 00:19:55,998 Okay. Okay? And it's really close to home, William. 382 00:19:56,082 --> 00:19:57,581 Man: It's very close to home. What is it? 383 00:19:57,665 --> 00:20:00,207 It's a-- it's a house. You have your own bedroom. 384 00:20:00,290 --> 00:20:02,082 What is it? It's a home. 385 00:20:02,165 --> 00:20:03,831 William: I don't wanna go. 386 00:20:03,915 --> 00:20:05,915 What-- what is it that you are worried about? 387 00:20:05,998 --> 00:20:08,332 I'll behave at home. I've been doing great. 388 00:20:08,415 --> 00:20:11,831 I really don't-- You have been doing really well... 389 00:20:11,915 --> 00:20:13,957 Brian: You've been doing better. 390 00:20:14,040 --> 00:20:18,790 ...but there's still some things that need to mature and get completely safe. 391 00:20:18,873 --> 00:20:20,374 Question. Brian: Yes. 392 00:20:20,457 --> 00:20:24,581 Why are you trying to make my parents more strict with me? 393 00:20:24,665 --> 00:20:27,457 Brian: Strict? Am I trying to make them more strict? 394 00:20:27,540 --> 00:20:29,332 Yeah. What does strict mean? 395 00:20:29,415 --> 00:20:32,457 What are they doing that mean-- that's strict? 396 00:20:32,540 --> 00:20:36,082 I don't know, but-- but you've been doing this 397 00:20:36,165 --> 00:20:38,207 since we've started seeing you. 398 00:20:38,290 --> 00:20:39,623 Yeah. Can you tell me why? 399 00:20:39,706 --> 00:20:41,790 Brian: This is big news, huh? 400 00:20:41,873 --> 00:20:45,415 Yeah. I'll do anything not to go. 401 00:20:45,499 --> 00:20:47,457 Brian: You've been working really, really hard. 402 00:20:47,540 --> 00:20:49,290 Edie: We know you've been working hard, William, 403 00:20:49,374 --> 00:20:52,165 and I know your intention is to behave. 404 00:20:52,249 --> 00:20:55,374 There's just still some things that you can't quite help, 405 00:20:55,457 --> 00:20:58,082 and they're there to help you with that. I don't wanna go. 406 00:20:58,165 --> 00:21:00,540 I'm gonna ask you to do something, okay? What? 407 00:21:00,623 --> 00:21:02,499 I want you to trust us... 408 00:21:02,581 --> 00:21:04,415 'cause right now... 409 00:21:04,499 --> 00:21:06,540 you-- Don't make me go. 410 00:21:06,623 --> 00:21:10,123 I want you to just trust that we're making the best decision. 411 00:21:10,207 --> 00:21:12,665 I'm gonna act up there and get restrained. 412 00:21:12,748 --> 00:21:14,457 Edie: This is the step that we need to take 413 00:21:14,540 --> 00:21:16,040 to get home. (whimpers) 414 00:21:16,123 --> 00:21:17,873 Okay? We're almost there. 415 00:21:17,957 --> 00:21:20,249 Brian: And use your skills right now, okay? 416 00:21:20,332 --> 00:21:22,957 'Cause we want you to remain safe. Yeah. 417 00:21:25,748 --> 00:21:27,332 We'll just give him a little bit of a break. 418 00:21:27,415 --> 00:21:30,165 That's a lot. Let him digest a little bit. Yeah. 419 00:21:30,249 --> 00:21:32,249 (indistinct chatter) 420 00:21:34,957 --> 00:21:39,499 He needs somebody there 24 hours a day 421 00:21:39,581 --> 00:21:43,915 to help him through the emotional roller coasters he goes through. 422 00:21:43,998 --> 00:21:45,873 You know, we can only do so much. 423 00:21:45,957 --> 00:21:49,207 We have... you know, work, and we have a daughter, 424 00:21:49,290 --> 00:21:52,665 and other things to tend to, and, um... 425 00:21:54,290 --> 00:21:57,748 He needs this amount of care right now. 426 00:21:57,831 --> 00:22:00,415 Residential treatment is, sometimes, the only option, 427 00:22:00,499 --> 00:22:02,207 and I think the hard part for parents-- 428 00:22:02,290 --> 00:22:04,332 I've watched some of my own friends go through this-- 429 00:22:04,415 --> 00:22:06,207 is to accept it again, 430 00:22:06,290 --> 00:22:08,873 to say, "No, this isn't that you were a bad parent. 431 00:22:08,957 --> 00:22:12,540 This is the appropriate treatment for your child." 432 00:22:12,623 --> 00:22:15,706 In the very worst cases, sometimes states will require you... 433 00:22:16,831 --> 00:22:17,915 Nobody likes to hear this. 434 00:22:17,998 --> 00:22:19,415 Sometimes states will require you to sign 435 00:22:19,499 --> 00:22:21,831 your child over to the state, so you're-- 436 00:22:21,915 --> 00:22:24,082 You're giving up your child, 437 00:22:24,165 --> 00:22:26,957 just so your child can get care. 438 00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:29,790 ♪ ♪ 439 00:22:42,374 --> 00:22:44,290 (indistinct chatter) 440 00:22:59,082 --> 00:23:03,332 I'm here, and we wanted an update on that case you talked about. 441 00:23:04,415 --> 00:23:05,998 Our bureau responds to all 442 00:23:06,082 --> 00:23:08,957 the critical incidents in LA County. 443 00:23:09,040 --> 00:23:12,623 The most commonly known thing that we have 444 00:23:12,706 --> 00:23:14,540 is our psychiatric mobile response team, 445 00:23:14,623 --> 00:23:18,374 which provides evaluations of individuals 446 00:23:18,457 --> 00:23:20,873 who are suicidal, homicidal, or gravely disabled. 447 00:23:20,957 --> 00:23:22,873 (woman speaks on phone) 448 00:23:31,706 --> 00:23:33,998 Tony: But he's also talking about killing himself, right? 449 00:23:34,082 --> 00:23:36,581 Woman: Yeah, yeah. No, no. Yeah, he's-- 450 00:23:49,415 --> 00:23:51,249 Hi, Ms. Cora. How you doing? Hi. Fine. 451 00:23:51,332 --> 00:23:52,748 Can I come in? Yes, come in. 452 00:23:52,831 --> 00:23:53,915 Great, great, great. 453 00:23:53,998 --> 00:23:56,165 This is Vontae. 454 00:23:56,249 --> 00:23:58,249 What's his first name? Vontae, with a "V." 455 00:23:58,332 --> 00:23:59,665 Vontae, how you doing? Mm-hmm. 456 00:23:59,748 --> 00:24:01,207 Tony: Do you know who I am? No. 457 00:24:01,290 --> 00:24:03,665 Never met me. Me neither. My name's Tony. 458 00:24:03,748 --> 00:24:06,915 Well, the reason we came by is that 459 00:24:06,998 --> 00:24:10,249 we're really, uh, interested in what's going on with you 460 00:24:10,332 --> 00:24:13,249 and trying to figure out how we can help you and your mom. 461 00:24:13,332 --> 00:24:16,915 Maybe we can start by you telling me, 462 00:24:16,998 --> 00:24:19,499 what's going on. Nothing. 463 00:24:19,581 --> 00:24:22,332 Everything's okay? Mm-hmm. 464 00:24:22,415 --> 00:24:25,873 Well, that's not what we heard, and that's why we're here. 465 00:24:25,957 --> 00:24:30,665 I feel like he's a kid with so much bottled up inside of him, 466 00:24:30,748 --> 00:24:33,957 so much anger, and some of the things he writes in the letters 467 00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:38,581 and on the paper is saying, "Okay, something is wrong. I need some help. 468 00:24:38,665 --> 00:24:41,831 There is something going on with me. Somebody please help me." 469 00:24:41,915 --> 00:24:44,706 Tony: Yeah, your mom said that you got a lot of anger inside. 470 00:24:44,790 --> 00:24:46,374 You think that's what it is? Vontae: No. 471 00:24:46,457 --> 00:24:48,581 I ain't got no anger. Tony: What do you think it is? 472 00:24:51,957 --> 00:24:53,873 I don't know. Tony: Maybe a lot of hurt? 473 00:24:53,957 --> 00:24:56,374 Probably. Tony: Yeah, miss daddy? 474 00:24:56,457 --> 00:24:58,499 Yeah, of course. Tony: Yeah. 475 00:24:58,581 --> 00:25:01,873 That's tough, you know? You've been through a lot. 476 00:25:04,040 --> 00:25:06,915 What-- what worries you the most? 477 00:25:06,998 --> 00:25:10,623 (sighs) You know, what worries me the most is... 478 00:25:14,082 --> 00:25:16,374 I don't want... 479 00:25:16,457 --> 00:25:20,123 to see him on the news as one of those kids 480 00:25:20,207 --> 00:25:23,457 that didn't get the help that he was supposed to get 481 00:25:23,540 --> 00:25:26,290 and-- and it leads to destruction. 482 00:25:26,374 --> 00:25:28,957 Just-- that's what I don't want to happen. 483 00:25:29,040 --> 00:25:32,415 I mean, that's what I'm afraid of. 484 00:25:32,499 --> 00:25:34,165 (chattering) 485 00:25:34,249 --> 00:25:35,915 Cora: He didn't really know his father, 486 00:25:35,998 --> 00:25:41,082 but I think his father has such a great impact on me and the kids. 487 00:25:41,165 --> 00:25:43,915 (kids chattering) 488 00:25:43,998 --> 00:25:46,374 Cora: Well, it wasn't a shoot-out. The police shot him, 489 00:25:46,457 --> 00:25:48,499 though he wasn't-- he didn't have no gun. 490 00:25:49,457 --> 00:25:51,623 His father went to the fish market 491 00:25:51,706 --> 00:25:56,249 on Crenshaw and... Manchester, 492 00:25:56,332 --> 00:26:01,290 and I guess he fit one of the profiles of a gang member, 493 00:26:01,374 --> 00:26:05,623 and they had him-- had him get against the car, 494 00:26:05,706 --> 00:26:07,457 had his hands on the car, 495 00:26:07,540 --> 00:26:11,415 and he turned around and told them that-- he didn't like wearing belts. 496 00:26:11,499 --> 00:26:14,623 And he was a pretty big man, so they told him-- 497 00:26:14,706 --> 00:26:18,123 Well, he was telling them that he needed to pull his pants up. 498 00:26:18,207 --> 00:26:19,457 And when he pulled 'em-- 499 00:26:19,540 --> 00:26:21,332 when he was reaching to pull his pants up, 500 00:26:21,415 --> 00:26:25,748 I guess they thought he had a gun, and then they started shooting. 501 00:26:25,831 --> 00:26:28,332 And then when they went to look, it wasn't a gun. 502 00:26:28,415 --> 00:26:31,790 He was pulling up his pants, and he was like-- he was-- 503 00:26:31,873 --> 00:26:33,665 he had some alcohol in a bag, 504 00:26:33,748 --> 00:26:36,415 but it wasn't alcohol, it was a soda. 505 00:26:39,332 --> 00:26:40,873 And... 506 00:26:46,374 --> 00:26:48,665 He does have a lot of strikes against him, 507 00:26:48,748 --> 00:26:50,457 so there's no doubt about that. 508 00:26:50,540 --> 00:26:53,457 But the question becomes, what can we wrap around him, 509 00:26:53,540 --> 00:26:56,165 so that he can have the right kind of guidance 510 00:26:56,249 --> 00:26:58,831 as things get a little more complicated? 511 00:26:58,915 --> 00:27:01,499 Well, he has the predisposition of substance abuse as well. 512 00:27:01,581 --> 00:27:03,207 Tony: Yeah, the whole thing. He's got everything. 513 00:27:03,290 --> 00:27:04,665 So, he's got the dad's death in his head 514 00:27:04,748 --> 00:27:08,040 and the ultimate solution-- suicide by cop. Right? Mm-hmm. 515 00:27:08,123 --> 00:27:11,623 You know, one of the things that we are going to push 516 00:27:11,706 --> 00:27:16,207 is for-- in September, for a more... 517 00:27:16,290 --> 00:27:19,706 I would say, comprehensive assessment of Vontae. 518 00:27:19,790 --> 00:27:22,207 I don't know if there's some kind of psychosis or not. 519 00:27:22,290 --> 00:27:24,623 Right now, he's got the diagnosis of bipolar, 520 00:27:24,706 --> 00:27:27,748 but, you know, it's still something that 521 00:27:27,831 --> 00:27:30,123 they really need to tease out. 522 00:27:36,415 --> 00:27:38,249 Edie: Hey, William. William: What? 523 00:27:38,332 --> 00:27:41,540 What? I've been doing so good at home! You're being unreasonable! 524 00:27:41,623 --> 00:27:44,706 Bill: William. Hey. It's only-- Edie: Okay. 525 00:27:44,790 --> 00:27:47,040 Why do you want me to go so bad? 526 00:27:47,123 --> 00:27:49,249 Be re-- be-- Negotiate! 527 00:27:49,332 --> 00:27:51,249 I've been doing so good at home! 528 00:27:51,332 --> 00:27:54,082 (Bill speaks indistinctly) 529 00:27:54,165 --> 00:27:56,581 William: Yes. Yes. 530 00:27:56,665 --> 00:27:58,415 I'm not going. 531 00:27:58,499 --> 00:28:00,249 No, you're-- (spits) 532 00:28:00,332 --> 00:28:01,457 No. 533 00:28:02,998 --> 00:28:05,623 (sighs) 534 00:28:05,706 --> 00:28:08,374 We know this, that illnesses 535 00:28:08,457 --> 00:28:09,998 that involve psychosis, 536 00:28:10,082 --> 00:28:11,457 where people become irrational, 537 00:28:11,540 --> 00:28:12,915 they may become frightened, 538 00:28:12,998 --> 00:28:15,748 they may become highly, highly paranoid-- 539 00:28:15,831 --> 00:28:17,249 they can be dangerous. 540 00:28:17,332 --> 00:28:19,332 That's part of the disorder. 541 00:28:19,415 --> 00:28:20,623 We understand that. 542 00:28:20,706 --> 00:28:23,207 That's why it's so important that they be treated, 543 00:28:23,290 --> 00:28:25,249 because when they are treated, 544 00:28:25,332 --> 00:28:28,123 there is a profound reduction in risk. 545 00:28:28,207 --> 00:28:30,123 And in fact, at that point, it's much more likely, 546 00:28:30,207 --> 00:28:32,082 they're going to be hurt by somebody else 547 00:28:32,165 --> 00:28:33,706 rather than them hurting somebody else. 548 00:28:33,790 --> 00:28:36,290 (William screaming) I thought I was staying home! 549 00:28:36,374 --> 00:28:39,831 William. (screaming) 550 00:28:39,915 --> 00:28:42,290 Call the cops, have them come over and take me. 551 00:28:42,374 --> 00:28:43,706 Okay, you don't have to do that. 552 00:28:43,790 --> 00:28:46,457 Aah! I thought I was staying home! 553 00:28:46,540 --> 00:28:48,873 William. I thought I was staying home! 554 00:28:48,957 --> 00:28:52,457 Let me stay home or I'll start threatening to hurt myself! 555 00:28:52,540 --> 00:28:57,040 (screaming) 556 00:28:57,123 --> 00:28:59,957 Don't take me. Edie: I can't drive with you like that. 557 00:29:00,040 --> 00:29:01,665 (William crying) Edie: The police are here. 558 00:29:01,748 --> 00:29:03,249 (siren wailing) 559 00:29:03,332 --> 00:29:05,165 (crying continues) 560 00:29:10,374 --> 00:29:14,207 I wanna live at home! I wanna be at home! 561 00:29:14,290 --> 00:29:17,499 Edie: Help! I wanna be at home! 562 00:29:17,581 --> 00:29:20,540 I miss home! I wanna be at home! 563 00:29:20,623 --> 00:29:23,457 I wanna be at home! I wanna be at home! 564 00:29:23,540 --> 00:29:24,998 I wanna live at home! 565 00:29:25,082 --> 00:29:28,123 Officer: Come here, buddy. (William crying) 566 00:29:28,207 --> 00:29:29,748 Liza: I can tell you there's nothing harder 567 00:29:29,831 --> 00:29:32,499 than watching your 11-year-old child 568 00:29:32,581 --> 00:29:37,040 be handcuffed and pushed into the back of a police car... 569 00:29:38,290 --> 00:29:40,374 because of what you know... 570 00:29:40,457 --> 00:29:42,665 is just a behavioral symptom. 571 00:29:42,748 --> 00:29:45,457 I can't tell you how many parents have described to me 572 00:29:45,540 --> 00:29:47,831 having to call the police on their kids 573 00:29:47,915 --> 00:29:50,873 and have said to me, "It was the hardest, saddest thing 574 00:29:50,957 --> 00:29:52,957 "that I ever had to do in my life. 575 00:29:53,040 --> 00:29:56,332 "To call the police to come in to discipline my own child, 576 00:29:56,415 --> 00:30:00,706 whom I couldn't control felt to me like the biggest failure I had ever known." 577 00:30:00,790 --> 00:30:04,665 ♪ ♪ 578 00:30:04,748 --> 00:30:07,082 (William crying) 579 00:30:18,748 --> 00:30:20,249 (crying) 580 00:30:20,332 --> 00:30:23,623 ♪ ♪ 581 00:30:30,457 --> 00:30:34,290 I mean, this has been just about every month for-- 582 00:30:34,374 --> 00:30:39,082 I don't know-- almost a year now. 583 00:30:39,165 --> 00:30:43,165 And Bill's going there, and then I'm gonna... 584 00:30:44,123 --> 00:30:46,665 take over for Bill. We do shifts, so... 585 00:30:47,831 --> 00:30:49,374 he'll stay with him in ER, 586 00:30:49,457 --> 00:30:52,915 until I get there, and then I'll relieve him for a few hours, 587 00:30:52,998 --> 00:30:54,957 so that he can get a little bit of work done. 588 00:31:00,249 --> 00:31:03,290 When puberty hit, he just went into mental illness. 589 00:31:03,374 --> 00:31:07,165 It was more a mix between autism... 590 00:31:07,249 --> 00:31:09,873 and anxiety disorders and things like that, 591 00:31:09,957 --> 00:31:13,415 and then somewhere around puberty, he started hearing voices. 592 00:31:13,499 --> 00:31:17,581 And, um, pretty scary voices, actually, 593 00:31:17,665 --> 00:31:19,540 like telling him... 594 00:31:20,998 --> 00:31:22,915 "I want you to do what James Holmes did." 595 00:31:24,873 --> 00:31:26,790 William is fascinated with James Holmes. 596 00:31:26,873 --> 00:31:28,998 He's fascinated with the story. 597 00:31:29,082 --> 00:31:32,457 I think it scares him, because he stayed at Children's Hospital, 598 00:31:32,540 --> 00:31:35,415 and he knew that James Holmes lived nearby. 599 00:31:36,415 --> 00:31:37,998 And, um... 600 00:31:38,082 --> 00:31:40,040 and I think in a way, he's kind of testing 601 00:31:40,123 --> 00:31:42,457 to see-- is he as bad as James Holmes? 602 00:31:42,540 --> 00:31:44,123 'Cause he's asked that a few times. 603 00:31:44,207 --> 00:31:46,623 "Am I as bad as him? Am I gonna end up like him?" 604 00:31:46,706 --> 00:31:48,915 Newsman: His hair still bright orange, 605 00:31:48,998 --> 00:31:51,998 James Holmes stared blankly and yawned in court today 606 00:31:52,082 --> 00:31:55,665 where, for the first time, his lawyers claimed he is mentally ill. 607 00:31:55,748 --> 00:31:57,665 The past several weeks have seen 608 00:31:57,748 --> 00:31:59,873 another deadly outbreak of mass shootings, 609 00:31:59,957 --> 00:32:02,665 part of an epidemic of senseless violence 610 00:32:02,748 --> 00:32:05,499 that's now occurring on a regular basis. 611 00:32:05,581 --> 00:32:08,457 It's become harder and harder to ignore the fact 612 00:32:08,540 --> 00:32:10,915 that the majority of the people pulling the triggers 613 00:32:10,998 --> 00:32:13,415 have turned out to be severely mentally ill. 614 00:32:14,706 --> 00:32:16,998 There's every reason to think that there's something 615 00:32:17,082 --> 00:32:18,790 about the way the brain's functioning 616 00:32:18,873 --> 00:32:21,040 that leads to the symptoms that you see. 617 00:32:21,123 --> 00:32:23,831 That's important to us, because what we've learned 618 00:32:23,915 --> 00:32:25,581 in the case of heart disease is 619 00:32:25,665 --> 00:32:27,957 that you have to get past the symptoms 620 00:32:28,040 --> 00:32:30,998 You have to begin to look at the mechanisms of disease. 621 00:32:31,082 --> 00:32:34,540 It's like giving painkillers to someone who's got chest pain. 622 00:32:34,623 --> 00:32:38,082 You can give them a way to relieve the short-term pain, 623 00:32:38,165 --> 00:32:41,374 but what you really wanna do is figure out what's wrong with their heart 624 00:32:41,457 --> 00:32:42,706 and figure out how to make sure 625 00:32:42,790 --> 00:32:46,706 that they're getting the best heart function possible. 626 00:32:46,790 --> 00:32:48,831 The same can be said for mental illness. 627 00:32:48,915 --> 00:32:50,957 (rock music plays on computer) 628 00:32:51,040 --> 00:32:53,665 (gunfire, explosions) 629 00:33:05,040 --> 00:33:08,290 (TV playing indistinctly) 630 00:33:11,873 --> 00:33:15,665 I'm going to be meeting with the case manager 631 00:33:15,748 --> 00:33:17,040 and the two people from the program. 632 00:33:17,123 --> 00:33:18,623 Just-- it's a meet-and-greet pretty much. 633 00:33:18,706 --> 00:33:20,665 They're gonna come over, tell me about the program, 634 00:33:20,748 --> 00:33:22,374 what to expect, what's gonna be going on. 635 00:33:22,457 --> 00:33:24,998 I mean, I would like if you guys would look at his medicines, 636 00:33:25,082 --> 00:33:27,540 and if you felt like you might want to try something else, 637 00:33:27,623 --> 00:33:29,415 whether it'd even be with the ADHD-- 638 00:33:29,499 --> 00:33:32,748 'cause it's like, I-- For a long time, I guess I was hoping 639 00:33:32,831 --> 00:33:34,457 there'd be a medicine that would fix it. 640 00:33:34,540 --> 00:33:37,332 When people are like, "Abilify has this calming nature and da-da-da." 641 00:33:37,415 --> 00:33:40,415 When I don't see that, I'm like, "How do I know if it's working? 642 00:33:40,499 --> 00:33:43,249 "I don't know. Is he supposed to be breaking his doors 643 00:33:43,332 --> 00:33:45,040 and having these meltdowns?" 644 00:33:45,123 --> 00:33:46,873 Right. I-- I don't know. 645 00:33:46,957 --> 00:33:49,415 Ethan has attention deficit disorder, 646 00:33:49,499 --> 00:33:52,499 hyperactive attention deficit disorder, ADHD, 647 00:33:52,581 --> 00:33:56,415 and oppositional defiance disorder, known as ODD, 648 00:33:56,499 --> 00:33:59,249 and with the underlying diagnosis of autism-- 649 00:33:59,332 --> 00:34:00,748 so he's on the spectrum. 650 00:34:00,831 --> 00:34:04,499 He's high-functioning but just on the spectrum. 651 00:34:04,581 --> 00:34:06,706 It's almost like I kind of feel like at times, 652 00:34:06,790 --> 00:34:09,249 I forced the other symptoms into play with the doctor, 653 00:34:09,332 --> 00:34:12,581 saying, "Look, obviously, there's something else going on." 654 00:34:12,665 --> 00:34:15,998 Like right now, they say they won't diagnose him with bipolar, he's too young, 655 00:34:16,082 --> 00:34:19,165 but even if, he's on meds that are-- 656 00:34:19,249 --> 00:34:20,915 that people with bipolar would take. 657 00:34:20,998 --> 00:34:24,249 It's almost like a Ouija board experience, right? 658 00:34:24,332 --> 00:34:26,706 Where you take your child into the specialist, it's like, "Ooh!" 659 00:34:26,790 --> 00:34:29,123 They interview him for a while, they give him a bunch of little tests, 660 00:34:29,207 --> 00:34:32,540 and then I don't know, they're like, "Ooh! 661 00:34:32,623 --> 00:34:35,457 Oppositional defiance disorder! That's what it is today." 662 00:34:35,540 --> 00:34:37,332 You're like, "Okay, what do we do for that?" 663 00:34:37,415 --> 00:34:39,457 "Well, we're gonna take this drug and this drug and this drug," 664 00:34:39,540 --> 00:34:42,957 And my child-- I think he'd been on 12 or 13 different drugs, 665 00:34:43,040 --> 00:34:44,374 again, by the time he was 12 years old. 666 00:34:44,457 --> 00:34:46,873 A lot of these medications aren't tested in children, 667 00:34:46,957 --> 00:34:48,374 many of 'em are off-label-- 668 00:34:48,457 --> 00:34:50,957 sometimes they're like for blood pressure or something-- 669 00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:53,998 and that's a frightening experience for a parent. 670 00:34:54,082 --> 00:34:56,290 At this point, a lot of the time, 671 00:34:56,374 --> 00:34:59,457 someone guesses at a diagnosis, medicates for it, 672 00:34:59,540 --> 00:35:01,499 "Oh, the medication didn't work, 673 00:35:01,581 --> 00:35:04,748 therefore you probably don't have that syndrome. Let's try another one." 674 00:35:04,831 --> 00:35:06,706 And it feels like the child is a dartboard, 675 00:35:06,790 --> 00:35:09,165 and you're sitting there thinking, "We'll throw this. We'll throw that. 676 00:35:09,249 --> 00:35:11,831 Oh, look, that one seems to help. Okay, I guess he must have this," 677 00:35:11,915 --> 00:35:15,040 and the diagnosis is the result of a medication response 678 00:35:15,123 --> 00:35:18,457 rather than the basis for the assignment of a medication. 679 00:35:18,540 --> 00:35:20,457 Hey, Ethan. Hey, why don't you sit down? 680 00:35:20,540 --> 00:35:22,332 They're gonna leave soon. We want to tell you something. 681 00:35:22,415 --> 00:35:24,207 I wanna go. I wanna leave. Wait, wait, we want to talk-- 682 00:35:24,290 --> 00:35:26,290 No, I need to talk to you about something with them. 683 00:35:26,374 --> 00:35:27,957 Sit down. I want to use my Wii. 684 00:35:28,040 --> 00:35:30,207 Okay, I'll tell you what. You can, but first they're gonna leave, 685 00:35:30,290 --> 00:35:32,165 and we need to talk to you about something important, 686 00:35:32,249 --> 00:35:33,415 so could you just sit down? 687 00:35:33,499 --> 00:35:36,123 I wanna go on a ride. Okay. Listen. Listen. 688 00:35:36,207 --> 00:35:38,374 Listen, first let me talk to you. 689 00:35:38,457 --> 00:35:42,123 So, these are gonna be your new counselors. 690 00:35:43,123 --> 00:35:45,581 Okay? And then-- this is the thing, honey-- 691 00:35:45,665 --> 00:35:49,790 you're gonna start seeing them next Monday, but... 692 00:35:52,290 --> 00:35:54,374 they are actually in Lakewood, 693 00:35:54,457 --> 00:35:58,581 which is past Tacoma, okay? 694 00:35:58,665 --> 00:36:01,581 And you're gonna go and stay with them for a while. 695 00:36:01,665 --> 00:36:03,915 Stay with them? Like, live with them. 696 00:36:03,998 --> 00:36:05,957 They're gonna try and help you... 697 00:36:07,040 --> 00:36:10,249 control those anger problems you have... 698 00:36:10,332 --> 00:36:12,207 'cause you always say you want to try and control yourself, 699 00:36:12,290 --> 00:36:14,873 and you don't know how, and they're gonna try to help you. 700 00:36:14,957 --> 00:36:16,499 So you're gonna stay there for a while. 701 00:36:16,581 --> 00:36:18,581 'Cause they're just helping. They are, 702 00:36:18,665 --> 00:36:20,998 so you're gonna live with them for a couple months. 703 00:36:21,998 --> 00:36:24,748 All right. Wait. Is there gonna be everyone? 704 00:36:24,831 --> 00:36:28,165 No. It's not a hospital. It's a house. 705 00:36:28,249 --> 00:36:29,998 It's a house. Man: It's a nice house. 706 00:36:30,082 --> 00:36:31,748 Woman: It's a very nice house. 707 00:36:31,831 --> 00:36:34,873 So do you think you are gonna be... 708 00:36:36,540 --> 00:36:40,374 a big boy and you're gonna let them help you? 709 00:36:42,123 --> 00:36:44,290 I'm gonna take you to this place, okay? 710 00:36:44,374 --> 00:36:46,082 What? To their place. 711 00:36:46,165 --> 00:36:47,457 Next Monday. Next Monday. 712 00:36:47,540 --> 00:36:50,207 You're gonna start living there for a little while. 713 00:36:50,290 --> 00:36:51,915 Until three months? 714 00:36:51,998 --> 00:36:53,457 Or six. We don't know. 715 00:36:53,540 --> 00:36:56,123 Is it days? It depends on you. No, months. 716 00:36:56,207 --> 00:36:59,415 Like 90 days to 180 days. 717 00:37:03,207 --> 00:37:04,706 All right. 718 00:37:04,790 --> 00:37:06,290 Yeah, I don't think it's really sinking in, 719 00:37:06,374 --> 00:37:08,249 but at least he's taking it pretty well. 720 00:37:08,332 --> 00:37:09,415 Woman: That's good. 721 00:37:24,290 --> 00:37:25,540 Mitch's dog... 722 00:37:27,706 --> 00:37:29,915 is always in trouble. 723 00:37:29,998 --> 00:37:33,499 So, this poor thing is always staying at Red Hill. 724 00:37:33,581 --> 00:37:36,790 This is the facility that Mitch's dog is in. 725 00:37:36,873 --> 00:37:39,998 He has all these reports... 726 00:37:40,082 --> 00:37:41,748 for all the people that come in here. 727 00:37:41,831 --> 00:37:44,332 He processes his experiences, 728 00:37:44,415 --> 00:37:48,249 so, um, and how he does that is he role-plays. 729 00:37:48,332 --> 00:37:51,040 So he's made this into a residential facility, 730 00:37:51,123 --> 00:37:53,998 and the dog, you know, needs to fill this out-- 731 00:37:54,082 --> 00:37:57,290 name, gender, age, and why he's here. 732 00:37:57,374 --> 00:38:00,332 And then sometimes they go to juvenile home, 733 00:38:00,415 --> 00:38:05,665 sometimes they're going to Children's Hospital, things like that. 734 00:38:05,748 --> 00:38:08,290 So he role-plays in order to process, I think. 735 00:38:08,374 --> 00:38:11,290 ♪ ♪ 736 00:38:25,123 --> 00:38:26,290 (sighs) 737 00:38:35,374 --> 00:38:37,207 Hug? Here hug. 738 00:38:38,706 --> 00:38:41,165 (indistinct chatter) 739 00:38:45,165 --> 00:38:47,915 ♪ ♪ 740 00:38:47,998 --> 00:38:50,831 (Ethan shouting) No! No! 741 00:38:50,915 --> 00:38:53,873 No! Oh God. Ethan, knock it off. 742 00:38:53,957 --> 00:38:56,873 Ethan! Oh my God! Stop! 743 00:38:56,957 --> 00:38:59,249 (mutters) Shit. You bitch! 744 00:38:59,332 --> 00:39:02,873 Knock it off now! You want me to turn around and pull your hair? 745 00:39:02,957 --> 00:39:06,165 ♪ ♪ 746 00:39:16,915 --> 00:39:18,790 You make me angry! 747 00:39:18,873 --> 00:39:21,207 Stacy: Ethan. We're on the way to the place 748 00:39:21,290 --> 00:39:24,082 you're going to be staying, you're not gonna see me for a long time, 749 00:39:24,165 --> 00:39:26,957 and you want to act like this in the car? I don't want to see you. 750 00:39:27,040 --> 00:39:29,540 You don't want to see me? Okay. Well, guess what. 751 00:39:29,623 --> 00:39:32,123 You're not gonna get to, Ethan. Why don't you think about that? 752 00:39:32,207 --> 00:39:35,790 ♪ ♪ 753 00:39:37,540 --> 00:39:40,374 Look, Ethan, that's the house you're gonna stay at. 754 00:39:42,290 --> 00:39:43,623 Stacy: Okay. (phone chimes) 755 00:39:45,998 --> 00:39:48,415 Hey, Ken. This is Ethan. 756 00:39:48,499 --> 00:39:55,540 Just trying to call you, 'cause today, I'm not being with Mom anymore, 757 00:39:55,623 --> 00:39:58,415 and I'm not allowed to bring my electronics. 758 00:39:58,499 --> 00:40:02,165 I-- I have to leave, 759 00:40:02,249 --> 00:40:07,415 and I'm not gonna be with Mom anymore, maybe. Right. 760 00:40:07,499 --> 00:40:10,790 I live so-- I live super far away, 761 00:40:10,873 --> 00:40:13,040 with someone else, 762 00:40:13,123 --> 00:40:17,915 and that's all I wanted to say. So, bye, Ken. I'm gonna miss you. 763 00:40:20,040 --> 00:40:21,374 It's my turn. 764 00:40:21,457 --> 00:40:25,040 (kissing) Mmm. 765 00:40:25,123 --> 00:40:29,123 I love you and I'm gonna miss you so much. (Ethan cries) Me too. 766 00:40:31,123 --> 00:40:34,581 I really am gonna miss you. You're my baby boy. 767 00:40:37,873 --> 00:40:38,915 (Stacy coughs) 768 00:40:50,457 --> 00:40:51,457 (sniffles) 769 00:41:03,374 --> 00:41:08,706 (rock music plays on radio) 770 00:41:08,790 --> 00:41:10,165 Hey, William. What? 771 00:41:10,249 --> 00:41:13,665 Remember what I said. This is temporary. 772 00:41:13,748 --> 00:41:18,165 Yeah. I'm gonna find a place for us, okay? 773 00:41:19,831 --> 00:41:21,706 And... 774 00:41:21,790 --> 00:41:24,040 Okay. You're gonna be fine. You've done this before. 775 00:41:24,123 --> 00:41:25,790 Where is it? It's right here. 776 00:41:25,873 --> 00:41:27,374 That it? Mm-hmm. 777 00:41:27,457 --> 00:41:29,290 Look at me. It's gonna be fine. 778 00:41:29,374 --> 00:41:30,873 Okay. Okay? 779 00:41:32,790 --> 00:41:34,290 Gonna get out and walk around a little? 780 00:41:34,374 --> 00:41:35,915 Can you come with me? Of course. 781 00:41:35,998 --> 00:41:37,540 Okay. All right. 782 00:41:39,915 --> 00:41:42,790 This isn't permanent, is it? No. 783 00:41:42,873 --> 00:41:45,082 No. Not at all. 784 00:41:45,165 --> 00:41:48,249 You are grieving, you know, not your child 785 00:41:48,332 --> 00:41:51,165 so much as the dream associated with the child. 786 00:41:52,040 --> 00:41:53,831 Definite feelings of guilt, 787 00:41:53,915 --> 00:41:55,790 and then you play it over and over again, 788 00:41:55,873 --> 00:41:59,207 and then you think about, "Okay, well, should we have not have gotten divorced? 789 00:41:59,290 --> 00:42:01,249 "Should we have worked harder on our marriage? 790 00:42:01,332 --> 00:42:05,040 Did that, you know, make it harder on him?" 791 00:42:05,123 --> 00:42:07,873 So there was all these things along the way where it was like, 792 00:42:07,957 --> 00:42:09,665 "If I had kept him on a steady diet, 793 00:42:09,748 --> 00:42:12,082 "more holistic from the beginning, 794 00:42:12,165 --> 00:42:13,457 "could this have been... 795 00:42:14,623 --> 00:42:16,499 changed or the outcome could have been different?" 796 00:42:16,581 --> 00:42:18,290 So... 797 00:42:18,374 --> 00:42:19,957 As a parent, you will be blamed. 798 00:42:20,040 --> 00:42:23,290 You'll be blamed for your child's struggles. You'll be told, 799 00:42:23,374 --> 00:42:26,040 "Oh, you should just take parenting classes. That will fix it." 800 00:42:26,123 --> 00:42:29,415 For decades, we claimed 801 00:42:29,499 --> 00:42:31,207 that children developed autism 802 00:42:31,290 --> 00:42:33,998 because they had cold refrigerator mothers 803 00:42:34,082 --> 00:42:36,290 who are somehow pushing them into autism, 804 00:42:36,374 --> 00:42:38,998 that they had schizophrenia because they had parents 805 00:42:39,082 --> 00:42:42,040 who nurtured an unconscious wish that they not exist. 806 00:42:42,123 --> 00:42:43,831 If we go back a few hundred years, 807 00:42:43,915 --> 00:42:47,957 we insisted that parents caused dwarfism and other deformities 808 00:42:48,040 --> 00:42:52,165 which were a manifestation of the mother's unexpressed lascivious longings. 809 00:42:52,249 --> 00:42:56,415 And we've dropped the narrative of blame in all of those situations, 810 00:42:56,499 --> 00:43:00,249 but we still blame parents when their children are deeply troubled, 811 00:43:00,332 --> 00:43:02,957 and especially if they're deeply troubled in ways 812 00:43:03,040 --> 00:43:05,540 that involve criminal or destructive behavior. 813 00:43:05,623 --> 00:43:08,790 ♪ ♪ 814 00:43:12,998 --> 00:43:14,706 Liza: If your child has cancer, 815 00:43:14,790 --> 00:43:17,332 the whole community rallies around you, 816 00:43:17,415 --> 00:43:20,499 but mental illness is not a casserole disease. 817 00:43:20,581 --> 00:43:24,998 Nobody brings you a casserole when your child's in the acute care psychiatric hospital. 818 00:43:25,082 --> 00:43:27,082 ♪ ♪ 819 00:43:27,165 --> 00:43:30,831 Creigh: There was a time when you spoke only in hushed terms 820 00:43:30,915 --> 00:43:34,082 of people with serious physical illnesses like cancer. 821 00:43:35,207 --> 00:43:36,706 "She's got cancer, you know?" 822 00:43:36,790 --> 00:43:38,915 And... today, 823 00:43:38,998 --> 00:43:41,123 you know, anywhere you go, 824 00:43:41,207 --> 00:43:43,540 somebody's having a fundraiser for somebody with cancer, 825 00:43:43,623 --> 00:43:47,623 you know, we're having rallies. We're going things that are very, very in inspiring, 826 00:43:47,706 --> 00:43:49,581 and people give great testimonials 827 00:43:49,665 --> 00:43:52,040 about the way they fought battles and overcome 828 00:43:52,123 --> 00:43:53,998 these serious physical ailments, 829 00:43:54,082 --> 00:43:56,082 whether its cancer or diabetes 830 00:43:56,165 --> 00:43:59,249 or-- or any sort of disease. 831 00:43:59,332 --> 00:44:02,581 We need-- we need to do the same thing with mental illness. 832 00:44:02,665 --> 00:44:05,290 ♪ ♪ 833 00:44:08,123 --> 00:44:11,540 Cora: I would like to see him in some after-school programs. 834 00:44:11,623 --> 00:44:14,374 I think he needs to be around other kids his age, 835 00:44:14,457 --> 00:44:16,665 'cause he's never had anything like that. 836 00:44:16,748 --> 00:44:18,207 I think he needs to be out more, 837 00:44:18,290 --> 00:44:20,457 but I want him out with some structure. 838 00:44:20,540 --> 00:44:24,165 I don't want to just-- I don't want him just out on the streets. 839 00:44:26,998 --> 00:44:31,748 The reason I'm afraid is because before I got help 840 00:44:31,831 --> 00:44:34,706 and before I got on medication, I was like that. 841 00:44:34,790 --> 00:44:37,706 I would just snap and things would happen, 842 00:44:37,790 --> 00:44:39,374 and I'm sitting in jail like... 843 00:44:41,249 --> 00:44:43,123 "Wow. How did I get here? 844 00:44:43,207 --> 00:44:46,123 How did this happen? What exactly did happen?" 845 00:44:47,374 --> 00:44:49,040 Everything Vontae... 846 00:44:51,123 --> 00:44:53,123 is going through, I've been through that, 847 00:44:53,207 --> 00:44:57,581 and I'm still kind of going through it, you know, but I'm older now. 848 00:44:57,665 --> 00:45:00,207 You know? I am-- I'm older now, 849 00:45:00,290 --> 00:45:02,249 and he's still young, and I'm like, 850 00:45:02,332 --> 00:45:06,581 "If I had've got the help at his age, I think I'd be okay today." 851 00:45:06,665 --> 00:45:10,040 I think I'd be okay today, but I can't get... 852 00:45:11,249 --> 00:45:15,082 his mental health team to step it up 853 00:45:15,165 --> 00:45:17,748 or get him into some programs. 854 00:45:19,207 --> 00:45:21,123 They not hearing me. 855 00:45:21,207 --> 00:45:23,540 ♪ ♪ 856 00:45:44,415 --> 00:45:47,415 "My name is..." Both: "Ethan..." 857 00:45:47,499 --> 00:45:49,040 "And I am a great kid." 858 00:45:50,332 --> 00:45:52,706 "Sometimes Mom, Dad or my teacher 859 00:45:52,790 --> 00:45:55,207 "will tell me to clean up or do my work. 860 00:45:56,249 --> 00:45:57,915 Sometimes they will tell me..." 861 00:45:59,623 --> 00:46:00,915 Ethan: "What to do." 862 00:46:00,998 --> 00:46:02,581 "Sometimes I get mad." 863 00:46:04,915 --> 00:46:07,165 Mmm. Yeah. 864 00:46:10,415 --> 00:46:12,581 Ethan: I'm going home in three months. 865 00:46:14,290 --> 00:46:16,457 It's up to the staff... 866 00:46:16,540 --> 00:46:20,457 so, I don't go home for a while... 867 00:46:20,540 --> 00:46:23,499 'cause you know, I'm never gonna go home yet 868 00:46:23,581 --> 00:46:26,915 until, you know, I keep working on my behavior. 869 00:46:27,915 --> 00:46:30,415 But, you know, I'm still learning and... 870 00:46:31,665 --> 00:46:33,665 Yeah. 871 00:46:33,748 --> 00:46:37,499 I swiped my belt, but then they took my belt away. 872 00:46:37,581 --> 00:46:42,290 At least they let me keep my other belt, but only if I'm safe. 873 00:46:43,581 --> 00:46:45,706 Woman: Why'd you swipe your belt at the door? 874 00:46:45,790 --> 00:46:49,123 'Cause I got super angry and... 875 00:46:49,207 --> 00:46:51,915 But that was a long time ago, so... 876 00:46:53,457 --> 00:46:54,499 Yeah. 877 00:46:58,957 --> 00:47:01,457 What happens if you're good? Can you go to heaven? 878 00:47:03,998 --> 00:47:06,457 Even if you weren't, can you go to heaven? 879 00:47:08,499 --> 00:47:10,873 I mean, even if you aren't good, 880 00:47:10,957 --> 00:47:13,957 you still can go to heaven? 881 00:47:15,540 --> 00:47:18,581 Woman: I don't know all the answers to those questions. 882 00:47:18,665 --> 00:47:20,790 Well, you could go to hell... 883 00:47:22,165 --> 00:47:23,415 when you don't behave. 884 00:47:23,499 --> 00:47:26,165 I mean, hell's underground. 885 00:47:30,415 --> 00:47:32,748 Woman: Is that something you're worrying about? 886 00:47:32,831 --> 00:47:36,873 Well, what do you mean? I'm-I'm-- I'm not worried about nothing. 887 00:47:36,957 --> 00:47:38,581 Woman: Okay. So... 888 00:47:38,665 --> 00:47:40,165 (knocks on door) 889 00:47:41,623 --> 00:47:43,748 Come in. (door opens) 890 00:47:45,165 --> 00:47:46,457 Woman: Hi. 891 00:47:46,540 --> 00:47:50,165 It's two o'clock. Are you ready to move on with your schedule? 892 00:47:54,457 --> 00:47:59,332 Creigh: Gus was probably the most capable person I've-- I ever knew. 893 00:47:59,415 --> 00:48:01,873 He was-- he was able to do anything he wanted to do 894 00:48:01,957 --> 00:48:03,831 and do it at a high-- at a very high level. 895 00:48:03,915 --> 00:48:06,040 He made movies with his friends, 896 00:48:06,123 --> 00:48:09,957 and he-he-- he could speak any language he put his mind to learning. 897 00:48:10,040 --> 00:48:12,040 He could play any instrument he wanted to learn. 898 00:48:12,123 --> 00:48:14,540 He-- he was-- he was unbelievable. 899 00:48:15,831 --> 00:48:17,623 You go through pictures, you look at things, 900 00:48:17,706 --> 00:48:20,706 you think about things, lots of times with Gus, 901 00:48:20,790 --> 00:48:22,957 he-he-- he contributed a lot, 902 00:48:23,040 --> 00:48:25,748 and he-- he impacted so many lives. 903 00:48:25,831 --> 00:48:29,873 ♪ ♪ 904 00:48:32,249 --> 00:48:35,915 Nobody else in the family really thought there was a problem. 905 00:48:37,040 --> 00:48:41,332 In October of 2013, you know, 906 00:48:41,415 --> 00:48:45,499 I noticed on Facebook he-- he was just, you know-- 907 00:48:45,581 --> 00:48:47,957 he was concerned about... 908 00:48:49,040 --> 00:48:51,415 professors gang-- ganging up on him, 909 00:48:51,499 --> 00:48:54,957 and I was, um, I knew that wasn't Gus. 910 00:48:56,415 --> 00:48:59,623 But he started cutting his friends off... 911 00:48:59,706 --> 00:49:03,290 and then he just started behaving erratically. 912 00:49:03,374 --> 00:49:07,540 The next thing I know, he's decided to come home, to leave school. 913 00:49:08,790 --> 00:49:12,040 Maybe I didn't accept how sick he was. 914 00:49:12,123 --> 00:49:13,957 I mean, I-I-- I know that I didn't... 915 00:49:15,623 --> 00:49:18,581 but I-- I didn't expect violence. 916 00:49:30,123 --> 00:49:32,040 Hi. How are you? Is Mommy home? 917 00:49:32,123 --> 00:49:34,831 (child speaks softly) Can I talk to Mommy? 918 00:49:34,915 --> 00:49:36,207 Can you go get Mommy? 919 00:49:36,290 --> 00:49:37,581 (child speaks softly) Okay. 920 00:49:37,665 --> 00:49:38,706 Do you want to go get her? 921 00:49:38,790 --> 00:49:40,207 (child speaks softly) Maria: Thank you. 922 00:49:40,290 --> 00:49:43,457 I'll wait. Go ahead, go get Mommy. 923 00:49:43,540 --> 00:49:45,290 (child speaks softly) 924 00:49:45,374 --> 00:49:46,748 I think Cesar spoke to you. 925 00:49:46,831 --> 00:49:49,623 He went to the school on the 28th of October, 926 00:49:49,706 --> 00:49:51,499 and Ivanka was still here. 927 00:49:51,581 --> 00:49:53,873 Mm-hmm. So what happened? 928 00:49:53,957 --> 00:49:56,123 I know that you were struggling with him, right? 929 00:49:56,207 --> 00:50:00,040 Yeah, that's it. I just came downstairs from with the manager, 930 00:50:00,123 --> 00:50:03,790 because, you know, since she found out who's been lighting the fires... 931 00:50:03,873 --> 00:50:07,457 Mmm. Uh-huh. ...now I gotta pay for all the carpet that's been burned. 932 00:50:07,540 --> 00:50:10,082 And when I talked to another little boy in the building... 933 00:50:10,165 --> 00:50:13,623 Mm-hmm. ...he did admit that Vontae was setting fires. 934 00:50:13,706 --> 00:50:16,915 Wow. So I'm like, "He can't come back here. 935 00:50:16,998 --> 00:50:19,790 We'll get evicted." She already got a report 936 00:50:19,873 --> 00:50:22,207 that's to the owner, so I don't know what they're gonna do with us. 937 00:50:22,290 --> 00:50:23,706 We're gonna have to pay for the damages, 938 00:50:23,790 --> 00:50:26,082 which I don't have money to pay for the damages. 939 00:50:26,165 --> 00:50:27,706 What happened with the therapist? 940 00:50:27,790 --> 00:50:29,581 Was that even helpful? 941 00:50:29,665 --> 00:50:31,790 Was she still coming here? Uh-huh? You know what they tell me? 942 00:50:31,873 --> 00:50:33,873 They tell me 'cause I been getting on they case, 943 00:50:33,957 --> 00:50:36,915 I'm like, "You guys--" 'cause he started spiraling down. 944 00:50:36,998 --> 00:50:38,623 I'm like, "You guys gonna have to do something." 945 00:50:38,706 --> 00:50:42,165 I was like-- I been really emphasizing and really pushing them 946 00:50:42,249 --> 00:50:44,665 to get him in some after-school programs. 947 00:50:44,748 --> 00:50:47,207 I was like, "He needs to be in an after-school program..." Right. 948 00:50:47,290 --> 00:50:49,998 "...and he needs to be in something to keep him busy on the weekends." 949 00:50:50,082 --> 00:50:53,790 I've been saying it, saying it, saying it. Nobody's doing anything. 950 00:50:53,873 --> 00:50:57,249 Mm-hmm. So when they come over, when I start talking to them 951 00:50:57,332 --> 00:51:01,165 and really pressing them, they was like, "Well, we don't know what to do with him, 952 00:51:01,249 --> 00:51:04,499 'cause he won't open up to us," and you know, I'm like, 953 00:51:04,581 --> 00:51:08,540 "Well, if you can't do it, find somebody that can do it." Mm-hmm. 954 00:51:08,623 --> 00:51:10,457 You know, if you saying you can't reach him, 955 00:51:10,540 --> 00:51:13,581 he's not opening up, then refer him somewhere else. 956 00:51:13,665 --> 00:51:15,623 He has not seen a psychiatrist. 957 00:51:15,706 --> 00:51:18,165 Obviously, he's crying out for help. 958 00:51:18,249 --> 00:51:21,748 I'm not a professional, so I can't give-- all I can do is be a mother. 959 00:51:21,831 --> 00:51:23,915 Right. You know, that's all I can be, 960 00:51:23,998 --> 00:51:25,748 but he needs more than a mother. 961 00:51:25,831 --> 00:51:28,457 He needs some serious professional help. 962 00:51:32,998 --> 00:51:35,665 (sighs) You know, I just learned right now 963 00:51:35,748 --> 00:51:39,165 that, um, there was a conference call 964 00:51:39,249 --> 00:51:42,165 with the therapist, and one of the recommendations 965 00:51:42,249 --> 00:51:44,332 was to increase his mental health services 966 00:51:44,415 --> 00:51:46,374 and also a referral to a psychiatrist, 967 00:51:46,457 --> 00:51:48,165 and it doesn't seem like it happened, 968 00:51:48,249 --> 00:51:50,665 and so I'm gonna call right now and find out what happened with that. 969 00:51:50,748 --> 00:51:53,665 Yeah. I'm calling in regards to a minor 970 00:51:53,748 --> 00:51:56,665 who I've been working with-- him and his mother. 971 00:51:56,748 --> 00:51:59,998 It-- its been a while. Probably about maybe two months ago, 972 00:52:00,082 --> 00:52:03,581 there was a-- a teleconference with one of our supervisors 973 00:52:03,665 --> 00:52:08,457 and Cesar in regards to making a referral to a psychiatrist. 974 00:52:08,540 --> 00:52:10,998 So what happened with that referral? 975 00:52:11,082 --> 00:52:13,457 And see, if we would've had that information, 976 00:52:13,540 --> 00:52:16,457 it would've been very helpful, because if we had to take Mom 977 00:52:16,540 --> 00:52:20,040 to get the physical exam that Vontae needed, we would've done that. 978 00:52:20,123 --> 00:52:21,873 If in the future, you get a case 979 00:52:21,957 --> 00:52:23,374 and you have a problem with that, 980 00:52:23,457 --> 00:52:25,332 please let us know, and we'll do that, 981 00:52:25,415 --> 00:52:27,415 because... it's been a year 982 00:52:27,499 --> 00:52:29,165 and he hasn't been seen by a psychiatrist. 983 00:52:29,249 --> 00:52:30,748 That's pretty-- Yeah. 984 00:52:30,831 --> 00:52:33,123 (phone clatters) (sighs) 985 00:52:33,207 --> 00:52:35,082 So it was all based on the paperwork, 986 00:52:35,165 --> 00:52:39,915 on a-- on a-- on a... physical exam that was never taken place. 987 00:52:41,207 --> 00:52:42,540 Woman: What do you mean, "It was all"-- 988 00:52:42,623 --> 00:52:45,499 Well, I mean-- I mean that him being seen by a psychiatrist, 989 00:52:45,581 --> 00:52:48,040 it was-- they were just waiting for a physical exam, 990 00:52:48,123 --> 00:52:49,831 like the results of a physical exam. 991 00:52:49,915 --> 00:52:51,499 That's all they were waiting for. 992 00:52:52,748 --> 00:52:57,123 ♪ ♪ 993 00:53:05,998 --> 00:53:08,873 Woman: Okay, first, close your eyes and take a couple deep breaths... 994 00:53:10,332 --> 00:53:12,706 while I get this other paper out. 995 00:53:14,165 --> 00:53:15,249 (clatters) 996 00:53:15,332 --> 00:53:16,623 So throughout this whole thing, 997 00:53:16,706 --> 00:53:19,123 don't forget to breathe, okay? (inhales sharply) 998 00:53:19,207 --> 00:53:20,332 (soft flute music playing) 999 00:53:20,415 --> 00:53:23,623 Clench your fists. Real tight! (exhales) 1000 00:53:24,623 --> 00:53:26,332 And hold it for 10 seconds. 1001 00:53:26,415 --> 00:53:30,082 Nine, eight, seven, 1002 00:53:30,165 --> 00:53:34,665 six, five, four, 1003 00:53:34,748 --> 00:53:38,457 three, two, one. 1004 00:53:38,540 --> 00:53:40,790 Tense the muscles around your forehead 1005 00:53:40,873 --> 00:53:44,249 by raising your eyebrows as far as you can. 1006 00:53:44,332 --> 00:53:46,623 Just like that. And hold it. 1007 00:53:46,706 --> 00:53:48,290 Hold it right there, real tight. 1008 00:53:48,374 --> 00:53:49,873 Don't forget to breath. 1009 00:53:49,957 --> 00:53:53,706 10, nine, eight-- Thomas: The problem that we face most of all 1010 00:53:53,790 --> 00:53:57,332 is that we're still in love with the magic bullet. 1011 00:53:57,415 --> 00:53:59,040 We still think there's gonna be a pill 1012 00:53:59,123 --> 00:54:00,457 or there's gonna be a psychotherapy 1013 00:54:00,540 --> 00:54:02,290 or there's gonna be a critical insight. 1014 00:54:02,374 --> 00:54:04,831 If somebody says the right thing to the right person 1015 00:54:04,915 --> 00:54:06,998 at the right time, they're gonna be well. 1016 00:54:07,082 --> 00:54:08,915 That works great in Hollywood. 1017 00:54:08,998 --> 00:54:10,998 Doesn't actually work that well in real life. 1018 00:54:11,082 --> 00:54:13,581 These are really complicated problems. 1019 00:54:13,665 --> 00:54:16,998 It takes time, but it also takes 1020 00:54:17,082 --> 00:54:20,831 a lot of different converging kinds of interventions, 1021 00:54:20,915 --> 00:54:23,706 and that could include medicine, education, 1022 00:54:23,790 --> 00:54:27,290 skill building, what we call cognitive retraining. 1023 00:54:27,374 --> 00:54:30,957 That's what you need for recovery. It's not going to be simple. 1024 00:54:32,415 --> 00:54:35,040 ♪ ♪ 1025 00:54:38,249 --> 00:54:40,207 Ethan (on phone): Hello? Stacy (on phone): Hi, Ethan. 1026 00:54:42,374 --> 00:54:45,540 Ethan: Mom? Stacy: Hi, Baby. I miss you. 1027 00:54:45,623 --> 00:54:47,957 Ethan: Hey, Mom. How is your day going? 1028 00:54:48,040 --> 00:54:50,123 Stacy: It's going good. How's your day going? 1029 00:54:51,332 --> 00:54:52,706 Ethan: Oh, my day... 1030 00:54:53,998 --> 00:54:59,040 Some parts were bad, and some parts were good. 1031 00:54:59,123 --> 00:55:00,915 Stacy: Are you working on your behaviors? 1032 00:55:00,998 --> 00:55:02,165 (man speaks indistinctly) 1033 00:55:02,249 --> 00:55:03,957 Ethan: Some parts, yeah. 1034 00:55:05,623 --> 00:55:09,831 Stacy: Do you think you're, like, learning to try to not get so angry 1035 00:55:09,915 --> 00:55:11,748 or control that a little bit more? 1036 00:55:12,748 --> 00:55:14,123 Ethan: Well, kind of. 1037 00:55:15,415 --> 00:55:16,665 May I say hi to Elexa? 1038 00:55:16,748 --> 00:55:18,499 Stacy: Oh, honey, you could say hi to Elexa, 1039 00:55:18,581 --> 00:55:20,581 but Elexa's outside playing. 1040 00:55:22,040 --> 00:55:24,957 Okay, well, I love you, baby. Mwah! 1041 00:55:25,040 --> 00:55:26,123 Ethan: Mwah! 1042 00:55:27,790 --> 00:55:31,165 Bye, Mom. I love you. Stacy: Bye, baby. I love you too. 1043 00:55:31,249 --> 00:55:35,082 ♪ ♪ 1044 00:55:43,374 --> 00:55:45,915 Hey, why don't you tell me how your therapy's going 1045 00:55:45,998 --> 00:55:47,499 with Wendy. What do you mean? 1046 00:55:47,581 --> 00:55:49,457 Good. I haven't really talked to you about it. 1047 00:55:49,540 --> 00:55:52,374 So, what do you like about her? She's nice. 1048 00:55:53,665 --> 00:55:55,415 That's good. What do you guys do? 1049 00:55:55,499 --> 00:55:57,165 Play a board game. 1050 00:55:57,249 --> 00:55:58,581 You play board games? 1051 00:55:58,665 --> 00:56:01,040 And we talk. What do you talk about? 1052 00:56:01,123 --> 00:56:02,998 My diary, Mommy. 1053 00:56:03,082 --> 00:56:04,415 I can't tell you. 1054 00:56:04,499 --> 00:56:06,415 No. Okay, when I said that she's like your diary, 1055 00:56:06,499 --> 00:56:08,290 I meant that she can't tell me what you talk about. 1056 00:56:08,374 --> 00:56:10,499 That doesn't mean you can't tell me if you wanted to tell me. 1057 00:56:10,581 --> 00:56:12,915 I can't tell you what I said to her. 1058 00:56:12,998 --> 00:56:15,540 Well, you can tell me if you want to tell me. 1059 00:56:16,831 --> 00:56:18,540 Well, I don't want to tell you. 1060 00:56:18,623 --> 00:56:19,915 Nothing? Not anything? 1061 00:56:19,998 --> 00:56:22,706 Do you feel like you cannot talk to me about stuff? 1062 00:56:22,790 --> 00:56:23,957 Yeah. Why? 1063 00:56:24,040 --> 00:56:26,457 Because you always say comments about it. 1064 00:56:26,540 --> 00:56:28,165 No, I don't. Mm-hmm. 1065 00:56:28,249 --> 00:56:29,374 What I mean is... 1066 00:56:31,207 --> 00:56:32,831 I hope you don't feel you can't tell me things, 1067 00:56:32,915 --> 00:56:33,957 'cause you can. I do. 1068 00:56:34,040 --> 00:56:36,165 Can you explain to me why you... 1069 00:56:36,249 --> 00:56:37,665 want to take medicine and think it's so cool? 1070 00:56:37,748 --> 00:56:40,082 'Cause everyone else does. Who's everyone? 1071 00:56:41,249 --> 00:56:42,457 All my friends. 1072 00:56:42,540 --> 00:56:45,581 Ethan takes medicine every day because it helps him calm down. 1073 00:56:45,665 --> 00:56:50,207 Then can I do that? No, because you don't need that kind of help. 1074 00:56:50,290 --> 00:56:53,415 Well, I can't calm down sometimes. 1075 00:56:53,499 --> 00:56:57,207 Yeah, all people get angry and sad and hyper. 1076 00:56:57,290 --> 00:57:00,165 Mad. And mad. Well, that's angry. 1077 00:57:00,249 --> 00:57:02,499 Because of their mother? 1078 00:57:02,581 --> 00:57:03,873 I'm kidding. (giggles) 1079 00:57:15,332 --> 00:57:19,332 It kind of feels like they favor him over me. 1080 00:57:19,415 --> 00:57:22,581 But I know that they kind of have to... 1081 00:57:23,623 --> 00:57:25,165 put a lot of time and effort 1082 00:57:25,249 --> 00:57:27,082 into dealing with him. 1083 00:57:28,374 --> 00:57:30,998 Sometimes, like, I would want them to, like-- 1084 00:57:31,082 --> 00:57:33,123 I would-- for example, like, show them... 1085 00:57:34,082 --> 00:57:35,123 something I did at school, 1086 00:57:35,207 --> 00:57:37,290 like homework or a project or something, 1087 00:57:37,374 --> 00:57:40,957 but it... kind of would be like they were always busy, 1088 00:57:41,040 --> 00:57:43,748 had something with William, busy with William, 1089 00:57:43,831 --> 00:57:47,332 just always something with him. Always. 1090 00:57:50,623 --> 00:57:52,748 Edie: I think she needs a lot more attention 1091 00:57:52,831 --> 00:57:56,290 than a typical person her age. 1092 00:57:56,374 --> 00:57:58,748 It's really important that we give it to her, 1093 00:57:58,831 --> 00:58:02,457 or it's really upsetting to her, you know? Like, "Watch me do this, 1094 00:58:02,540 --> 00:58:05,207 and watch me do that." And he gets special treatment. 1095 00:58:05,290 --> 00:58:07,457 You know, he doesn't get grounded like she gets grounded. 1096 00:58:07,540 --> 00:58:10,915 The rules are different, and I think that's the one thing she resents, 1097 00:58:10,998 --> 00:58:13,040 is that the rules are different for him 1098 00:58:13,123 --> 00:58:15,249 than they are her, and they have to be. 1099 00:58:17,165 --> 00:58:18,332 Stacy: "Answer." 1100 00:58:18,415 --> 00:58:21,123 Elexa: A-N-S-W-E-R. 1101 00:58:21,207 --> 00:58:22,332 "State." 1102 00:58:22,415 --> 00:58:24,499 Elexa: S-T-A-T-E. 1103 00:58:26,249 --> 00:58:27,332 "Several." 1104 00:58:28,665 --> 00:58:30,748 Elexa: I know this one. 1105 00:58:30,831 --> 00:58:33,873 S-E-V-E-R-A-L. 1106 00:58:34,790 --> 00:58:37,207 I'm excited he's coming home, 1107 00:58:37,290 --> 00:58:39,290 and I'm kind of worried 1108 00:58:39,374 --> 00:58:42,374 that he's gonna... be bad still. 1109 00:58:43,873 --> 00:58:48,499 Like... he's gonna yell and stuff and hit me. 1110 00:58:49,831 --> 00:58:51,123 (sighs) 1111 00:59:08,123 --> 00:59:09,873 I did get the door replaced. 1112 00:59:09,957 --> 00:59:12,249 It was broke... hole on the side, 1113 00:59:12,332 --> 00:59:14,415 and I did fix the hole in the wall that he made, 1114 00:59:14,499 --> 00:59:17,957 so he had punched a hole in the wall, and I did get that fixed. 1115 00:59:18,040 --> 00:59:21,207 So, yeah, I tried to make it look nice and clean and new again 1116 00:59:21,290 --> 00:59:24,415 as much as I could for him when he came home, 1117 00:59:24,499 --> 00:59:27,998 and I hope that he doesn't re-destroy anything 1118 00:59:28,082 --> 00:59:30,748 after all the work I've put in and the money I'm spending, but... 1119 00:59:32,581 --> 00:59:34,957 you know, I wanted him to, hopefully-- 1120 00:59:35,040 --> 00:59:37,998 I wanted to have kind of a fresh start and a clean start-- 1121 00:59:38,082 --> 00:59:40,915 a clean slate so to speak, so. 1122 00:59:40,998 --> 00:59:44,415 This is really sad. Now that I have to fold all these clothes, 1123 00:59:44,499 --> 00:59:49,165 I can absolutely see, in these past six months just how much weight I've put on. 1124 00:59:49,249 --> 00:59:51,207 I don't think any of these fit me anymore. 1125 00:59:54,082 --> 00:59:55,915 I think it was... 1126 00:59:55,998 --> 00:59:59,165 the feeling of... you know, 1127 00:59:59,249 --> 01:00:01,499 having six months of thinking you needed 1128 01:00:01,581 --> 01:00:03,457 to start marking things off your bucket list. 1129 01:00:03,540 --> 01:00:05,998 To like feel like that because your son 1130 01:00:06,082 --> 01:00:09,040 is away from home is something else. 1131 01:00:15,374 --> 01:00:16,748 Ethan: I'm going home today. 1132 01:00:17,998 --> 01:00:19,207 (rock music plays) 1133 01:00:19,290 --> 01:00:21,165 I've heard this song before. (laughs) 1134 01:00:21,249 --> 01:00:23,457 Yeah, turn it up, please. Turn it up? 1135 01:00:23,540 --> 01:00:25,082 A little bit, okay? 1136 01:00:25,165 --> 01:00:26,165 ♪ ♪ 1137 01:00:26,249 --> 01:00:27,998 Yes, I like this song. Do you? 1138 01:00:28,082 --> 01:00:29,706 I miss this song. (laughs) 1139 01:00:29,790 --> 01:00:34,415 (vocalizing music) 1140 01:00:34,499 --> 01:00:37,581 ♪ Baby, baby, ooh, baby, baby ♪ 1141 01:00:37,665 --> 01:00:39,873 (laughs) ♪ Ooh, baby, baby ♪ 1142 01:00:39,957 --> 01:00:41,374 ♪ Baby, baby ♪ 1143 01:00:41,457 --> 01:00:45,123 ♪ Ooh, baby, baby, b-b-baby, baby ♪ 1144 01:00:46,581 --> 01:00:49,998 Can you do this? Oh! (vocalizes music) 1145 01:00:50,082 --> 01:00:52,249 (laughs) ♪ Make a film ♪ 1146 01:01:14,748 --> 01:01:15,831 Hi. Hey. 1147 01:01:15,915 --> 01:01:18,915 Stacy: Your hair's all wet. Yeah, I spiked it. 1148 01:01:18,998 --> 01:01:21,581 Can I have a hug? Someone spiked it for me. 1149 01:01:21,665 --> 01:01:24,290 Do I get a hug? Hi. Yeah. 1150 01:01:24,374 --> 01:01:28,123 Are you okay? No, I'm okay. I'm... 1151 01:01:28,207 --> 01:01:30,915 I thought you'd be excited to be home. No, no, I am. 1152 01:01:30,998 --> 01:01:32,374 Stacy: Can you read that for me? 1153 01:01:32,457 --> 01:01:34,415 (paper rustles) 1154 01:01:34,499 --> 01:01:36,374 "Home expectations. 1155 01:01:36,457 --> 01:01:38,415 "I will listen to adults. 1156 01:01:38,499 --> 01:01:40,790 "I will respect everyone and their property, 1157 01:01:40,873 --> 01:01:43,706 "and will not take things without asking permission. 1158 01:01:43,790 --> 01:01:47,082 "I will always be safe. I will keep my hands to myself. 1159 01:01:47,165 --> 01:01:49,165 "I will use my inside voice. 1160 01:01:49,249 --> 01:01:52,457 When I get upset, I will ask for a break." 1161 01:01:52,540 --> 01:01:55,540 Stacy: I need you to try to remember these rules... 1162 01:01:56,540 --> 01:01:58,499 and your coping skills. Are you looking at me? 1163 01:01:59,915 --> 01:02:01,040 Can I have a kiss? 1164 01:02:03,207 --> 01:02:04,332 I missed you. 1165 01:02:05,581 --> 01:02:07,581 Can you believe you're home? 1166 01:02:08,873 --> 01:02:10,290 Are you staying overnight? 1167 01:02:10,374 --> 01:02:13,040 Mm-hmm! I'm staying forever. (laughs) 1168 01:02:13,123 --> 01:02:16,873 I hope so. My God, how much gel did you use? The bottle? 1169 01:02:21,249 --> 01:02:23,915 (bird chirping) 1170 01:02:43,457 --> 01:02:45,332 Edie: William's been home about two months, 1171 01:02:45,415 --> 01:02:48,831 and at the beginning he was doing great, 1172 01:02:48,915 --> 01:02:50,873 and he was happy and... 1173 01:02:52,082 --> 01:02:54,165 really controlling his behavior. 1174 01:02:54,249 --> 01:02:56,249 We had some set up structure 1175 01:02:56,332 --> 01:02:58,415 for him that he followed really well. 1176 01:02:59,706 --> 01:03:02,998 And then slowly he started wanting to take back his... 1177 01:03:03,082 --> 01:03:07,957 personal freedoms and decided to... put up more of a fight, 1178 01:03:08,040 --> 01:03:10,499 and so some of the nights were... 1179 01:03:10,581 --> 01:03:14,290 pretty intense. We've had to call the police a couple of times on him. 1180 01:03:20,457 --> 01:03:23,748 Yeah, pretty much the money issue is the main reason 1181 01:03:23,831 --> 01:03:27,415 why William was let go from the home. 1182 01:03:27,499 --> 01:03:29,540 Medicaid doesn't want to pay. 1183 01:03:29,623 --> 01:03:32,374 When we had our meetings... 1184 01:03:32,457 --> 01:03:37,415 you have Brian who's saying, "This child needs to be in a home... 1185 01:03:37,499 --> 01:03:40,915 at least a year, you know, if not until he's 18," 1186 01:03:40,998 --> 01:03:43,873 because he wants to see long-term progress. 1187 01:03:43,957 --> 01:03:46,665 You know, Brian's thinking... 1188 01:03:46,748 --> 01:03:49,540 "Who is this person going to be when he's 25? 1189 01:03:49,623 --> 01:03:52,873 And what's the best way to make him a productive member of society?" 1190 01:03:52,957 --> 01:03:56,082 And that would be a long-term retraining 1191 01:03:56,165 --> 01:03:57,915 of everything that-- 1192 01:03:57,998 --> 01:04:00,998 that he's had to unlearn and relearn. 1193 01:04:01,082 --> 01:04:05,040 The county is looking at, "Well, he's been in for 120 days. 1194 01:04:05,123 --> 01:04:08,415 He's been in for 186 days." And they're counting days, 1195 01:04:08,499 --> 01:04:10,581 and to them, the days are dollar signs. 1196 01:04:10,665 --> 01:04:13,415 And so it seemed every time we had a meeting, 1197 01:04:13,499 --> 01:04:17,706 it was... the mental health professionals saying 1198 01:04:17,790 --> 01:04:20,957 "This is what he needs," and then the people paying it saying, 1199 01:04:21,040 --> 01:04:23,082 "You know, well, he's not hurting anybody. 1200 01:04:23,165 --> 01:04:24,915 He's not hurting himself. Let's send him home." 1201 01:04:24,998 --> 01:04:26,623 Man (on iPad): Kidding! Your ass isn't that-- 1202 01:04:26,706 --> 01:04:30,499 Well, it's pretty big, but I'd still do you with the lights off. 1203 01:04:30,581 --> 01:04:33,540 (clatters) Where the (bleeps) did that come from? 1204 01:04:33,623 --> 01:04:35,998 (continues indistinctly) 1205 01:04:38,332 --> 01:04:41,998 ♪ ♪ 1206 01:04:46,665 --> 01:04:48,332 Creigh: Sometime that spring, 1207 01:04:48,415 --> 01:04:51,123 Gus was agitated and twitchy... 1208 01:04:51,207 --> 01:04:54,957 and, um, one-word answers at best. 1209 01:04:55,040 --> 01:04:58,706 His behavior was just very erratic, very erratic. 1210 01:04:58,790 --> 01:05:01,457 You know, and by that I mean, you know, he would just-- 1211 01:05:01,540 --> 01:05:05,415 he would, um, he was... skin and bones then. 1212 01:05:05,499 --> 01:05:08,873 ♪ ♪ 1213 01:05:08,957 --> 01:05:11,207 One morning, I was coming out of the feed room 1214 01:05:11,290 --> 01:05:14,207 and Gus was just walking across the yard. 1215 01:05:14,290 --> 01:05:16,249 And I said, "Hey, bud, how'd you sleep?" 1216 01:05:16,332 --> 01:05:19,123 Or I said, "Hey, bud, good morning," or something like that. 1217 01:05:19,207 --> 01:05:21,332 I said, "Hey, bud, how'd you sleep?" 1218 01:05:21,415 --> 01:05:23,873 And he said, "Fine." 1219 01:05:23,957 --> 01:05:27,581 And I turned around, and-- and I went-- I-- 1220 01:05:27,665 --> 01:05:30,998 He was on me, and I-- I turned around-- 1221 01:05:31,082 --> 01:05:34,040 Once I-- You know, I guess I dropped the feed bucket, 1222 01:05:34,123 --> 01:05:36,998 but I got back around, and I said, you know, 1223 01:05:37,082 --> 01:05:39,082 I said, "What's going on, bud? 1224 01:05:39,165 --> 01:05:41,332 I love you so much." 1225 01:05:41,415 --> 01:05:43,748 And he didn't say anything. 1226 01:05:43,831 --> 01:05:45,165 ♪ ♪ 1227 01:05:45,249 --> 01:05:48,415 Newsman: As we speak right now, he is in critical condition. 1228 01:05:48,499 --> 01:05:52,831 State Senator Creigh Deeds has been stabbed inside of his home. 1229 01:05:52,915 --> 01:05:55,540 And the death of his son in what police are investigating 1230 01:05:55,623 --> 01:05:57,581 as an attempted murder-suicide. 1231 01:05:57,665 --> 01:06:00,581 Newswoman: Behind the blue lights blocking the Deeds' driveway 1232 01:06:00,665 --> 01:06:03,332 is a case that perplexes even police 1233 01:06:03,415 --> 01:06:06,998 as investigators search for answers. 1234 01:06:07,082 --> 01:06:11,290 Creigh: That night before, and it was just very clear he was in crisis. 1235 01:06:11,374 --> 01:06:13,665 He said to me-- at one point, he just-- 1236 01:06:13,748 --> 01:06:15,457 he-- he just talked about-- 1237 01:06:15,540 --> 01:06:17,082 he talked about suicide. 1238 01:06:18,207 --> 01:06:19,790 I brought Gus to the hospital, 1239 01:06:19,873 --> 01:06:22,040 and Gus was examined, and they determined 1240 01:06:22,123 --> 01:06:24,623 that he needed-- he was in crisis, 1241 01:06:24,706 --> 01:06:25,957 and he needed a bed, 1242 01:06:26,040 --> 01:06:27,790 but that there weren't beds available. 1243 01:06:27,873 --> 01:06:29,581 Newswoman: Deeds had to get a court order, 1244 01:06:29,665 --> 01:06:32,831 but the emergency custody would run out in six hours, 1245 01:06:32,915 --> 01:06:35,831 and a representative of the local community services board 1246 01:06:35,915 --> 01:06:38,706 told Deeds they couldn't find a bed. 1247 01:06:38,790 --> 01:06:42,082 I looked at the guy, I said, "The system failed my son tonight." 1248 01:06:42,165 --> 01:06:44,873 He said, "What?" He got very-- really defensive about it, 1249 01:06:44,957 --> 01:06:48,332 but, you know, but it-- it did. 1250 01:06:50,623 --> 01:06:52,499 I knew Gus would not be happy with me. 1251 01:06:52,581 --> 01:06:54,499 He would feel like I betrayed him... 1252 01:06:55,457 --> 01:06:56,915 so I was worried. 1253 01:06:56,998 --> 01:06:59,873 I was-- I was a little scared coming back. 1254 01:06:59,957 --> 01:07:01,665 I didn't expect the sort of... 1255 01:07:02,957 --> 01:07:05,706 situation-- I didn't expect that. 1256 01:07:05,790 --> 01:07:09,332 But I-I-- I was a little worried. 1257 01:07:09,415 --> 01:07:12,374 ♪ ♪ 1258 01:07:13,623 --> 01:07:14,831 I can't get Gus back. 1259 01:07:14,915 --> 01:07:16,748 No matter what I do, I can't get him back. 1260 01:07:16,831 --> 01:07:18,998 He's gone. 1261 01:07:19,082 --> 01:07:23,249 I know that-- that he would've been alive for longer 1262 01:07:23,332 --> 01:07:25,540 if we could've found him a bed that night. 1263 01:07:25,623 --> 01:07:28,165 ♪ ♪ 1264 01:07:28,249 --> 01:07:30,957 But I was blessed, so fortunate 1265 01:07:31,040 --> 01:07:33,415 to have him in my life for 24 years. 1266 01:07:46,290 --> 01:07:49,415 (man speaks indistinctly on phone) 1267 01:07:49,499 --> 01:07:51,082 Ethan: Oh God. 1268 01:07:52,873 --> 01:07:55,499 Uh-oh. I gotta-- Bill, I've gotta go right now. Ethan: Oh-ho-ho! 1269 01:07:55,581 --> 01:07:57,873 Stacy: You're not allowed to watch TV, Ethan. 1270 01:07:57,957 --> 01:07:59,374 Why are you in here? 1271 01:07:59,457 --> 01:08:01,457 It's just showing me something-- 1272 01:08:01,540 --> 01:08:03,290 It doesn't matter. You don't do that. 1273 01:08:03,374 --> 01:08:04,790 And as soon as I got off the phone with dad, 1274 01:08:04,873 --> 01:08:06,748 it was your power of choice time. Do you want to lose it? 1275 01:08:06,831 --> 01:08:08,915 This is my room! No, this isn't your room! 1276 01:08:08,998 --> 01:08:10,623 Don't spy on me like that! 1277 01:08:10,706 --> 01:08:12,665 Okay. That's enough. 1278 01:08:12,748 --> 01:08:15,290 Don't you touch the damn TV. 1279 01:08:15,374 --> 01:08:16,957 That is enough. Give me-- give-- 1280 01:08:17,040 --> 01:08:20,499 Don't touch the damn TV. One. Give me the controller now. 1281 01:08:20,581 --> 01:08:25,499 Two. Remember when you said you could go back to CCSS? You... piece of shit. 1282 01:08:25,581 --> 01:08:27,165 I don't have a TV in there. 1283 01:08:27,249 --> 01:08:28,790 Yeah, you do. Stop it, right now. 1284 01:08:28,873 --> 01:08:30,581 I will use this gun. 1285 01:08:30,665 --> 01:08:32,748 Oh my God. Get... 1286 01:08:32,831 --> 01:08:34,581 I'll fricking-- ...out of my room! 1287 01:08:34,665 --> 01:08:37,915 You get-- You fucking want me to shoot your gun? Stop. 1288 01:08:37,998 --> 01:08:41,165 I'll shoot that fricking gun. Okay! Enough! 1289 01:08:41,249 --> 01:08:43,249 Stop that, frickin' bitch! 1290 01:08:46,332 --> 01:08:48,457 (Ethan mutters) Stacy: You're-you're-- you're hurting me. 1291 01:08:48,540 --> 01:08:51,540 You realize that? Then don't you turn my Wii off! 1292 01:08:51,623 --> 01:08:53,706 What was the first rule? You lost your Wii. 1293 01:08:53,790 --> 01:08:55,332 You will not have it tomorrow, 1294 01:08:55,415 --> 01:08:58,706 and you will not have the TV. You are not gonna tell me-- boss around! 1295 01:08:58,790 --> 01:09:00,957 I will. Going in my room. I'm gonna get the gun 1296 01:09:01,040 --> 01:09:03,540 if you don't shut the fuck up! 1297 01:09:03,623 --> 01:09:05,040 I-- One! 1298 01:09:05,123 --> 01:09:07,873 Don't! Shut the fuck up! Two! 1299 01:09:07,957 --> 01:09:09,040 Go! 1300 01:09:09,123 --> 01:09:10,290 Shut up! 1301 01:09:13,790 --> 01:09:18,623 You need to calm down! 1302 01:09:18,706 --> 01:09:20,499 Man: Are you okay? Stacy: Let go! 1303 01:09:20,581 --> 01:09:21,748 Man: Do you need anything else? 1304 01:09:21,831 --> 01:09:23,249 Ethan: You want me to make you cry? 1305 01:09:23,332 --> 01:09:24,706 Then shut the fuck up. 1306 01:09:24,790 --> 01:09:26,499 Stacy: You're hurting me. 1307 01:09:29,249 --> 01:09:31,207 I tell my students that-- I'll ask them the question: 1308 01:09:31,290 --> 01:09:35,249 Let's say that you have a breakdown, what would you do? 1309 01:09:35,332 --> 01:09:38,249 What would your family do? And they invariably say, 1310 01:09:38,332 --> 01:09:40,998 "Oh, well, we'd-- we'd call the-- the doctor, 1311 01:09:41,082 --> 01:09:43,748 and you'd go to the hospital." 1312 01:09:43,831 --> 01:09:45,207 And I say, "This isn't true. 1313 01:09:45,290 --> 01:09:48,082 "You'd call 911, and the police would come, 1314 01:09:48,165 --> 01:09:50,165 "and if you were lucky, you'd live through that encounter, 1315 01:09:50,249 --> 01:09:51,540 and they'd take you to jail." 1316 01:09:51,623 --> 01:09:56,499 There really isn't a good way to get help for people. 1317 01:09:56,581 --> 01:10:00,915 I mean, my dad put me in juvenile detention, 1318 01:10:00,998 --> 01:10:04,374 and he said he did it because he was trying to help me 1319 01:10:04,457 --> 01:10:06,249 and he loved me. 1320 01:10:06,332 --> 01:10:09,040 At the time, I didn't understand what he was saying, 1321 01:10:09,123 --> 01:10:11,457 and I hated him for it. 1322 01:10:11,581 --> 01:10:15,457 But now I realize that 70 percent of people 1323 01:10:15,540 --> 01:10:19,332 in juvenile detention had a severe mental illness. 1324 01:10:23,831 --> 01:10:24,915 Tiara (on phone): Hello? 1325 01:10:24,998 --> 01:10:26,457 Cora: Tiara. Tiara: What? 1326 01:10:26,540 --> 01:10:28,457 Cora: You need to come and take care of Tristan. 1327 01:10:28,540 --> 01:10:30,123 I'm falling to pieces over here. 1328 01:10:30,207 --> 01:10:33,165 I'm-I'm-- I'm falling to pieces. 1329 01:10:33,249 --> 01:10:35,165 I can't keep it together in here. 1330 01:10:35,249 --> 01:10:36,873 I am falling. I'm crumbling, 1331 01:10:36,957 --> 01:10:39,540 falling to pieces, and I need for somebody 1332 01:10:39,623 --> 01:10:42,082 to take care of Tristan. (sniffles) 1333 01:10:42,165 --> 01:10:43,415 All right. 1334 01:10:45,457 --> 01:10:46,665 (sniffles) 1335 01:11:02,082 --> 01:11:03,499 Man: Where is Vontae? 1336 01:11:03,581 --> 01:11:04,998 I don't know. 1337 01:11:05,082 --> 01:11:06,831 I tried to call the social worker, 1338 01:11:06,915 --> 01:11:09,249 but he not answering, so I don't know. 1339 01:11:09,332 --> 01:11:13,540 All I know is, they was taking him to a command post... 1340 01:11:13,623 --> 01:11:16,581 last night, so I don't know where he's at. 1341 01:11:16,665 --> 01:11:20,748 Actually, I won't know until either he calls or the social worker calls. 1342 01:11:22,082 --> 01:11:23,540 Yeah, he called me... 1343 01:11:25,082 --> 01:11:28,540 about 12:30, and, um... 1344 01:11:28,623 --> 01:11:31,873 he left a message saying that he got put out of the group home, 1345 01:11:31,957 --> 01:11:36,207 and that he was at a gas station, at a pay phone, 1346 01:11:36,290 --> 01:11:38,457 and he didn't have nowhere to go. 1347 01:11:40,249 --> 01:11:43,165 So the next morning I got up, and I called the group home, 1348 01:11:43,249 --> 01:11:45,706 and the group home-- the guy answered the phone, 1349 01:11:45,790 --> 01:11:47,540 and he said that... (sniffles) 1350 01:11:47,623 --> 01:11:50,665 Vontae wasn't no longer with them 1351 01:11:50,748 --> 01:11:53,207 and that he AWOL'ed. 1352 01:11:53,290 --> 01:11:58,540 And he told me it was better-- best for me to call the social worker. 1353 01:11:58,623 --> 01:12:02,998 So I called the social worker, and Mark says... 1354 01:12:03,082 --> 01:12:05,207 you know, he don't know anything about this, 1355 01:12:05,290 --> 01:12:07,207 and he was like, "So where is Vontae?" 1356 01:12:07,290 --> 01:12:11,457 And I'm like, "I don't know. I called you 'cause I thought you knew where he was." 1357 01:12:13,332 --> 01:12:15,415 This is Mark, the social worker. 1358 01:12:17,540 --> 01:12:18,831 Hello? 1359 01:12:18,915 --> 01:12:20,581 (on phone) Hey, Cora. It's Mark. 1360 01:12:20,665 --> 01:12:22,040 Hi, Mark. 1361 01:12:22,123 --> 01:12:23,415 Mark: Hey. What's going on? 1362 01:12:23,499 --> 01:12:25,748 Where is Vontae? 1363 01:12:25,831 --> 01:12:27,540 Mark: I can't hear you. You gotta speak up. 1364 01:12:27,623 --> 01:12:29,873 I said where is Vontae? 1365 01:12:29,957 --> 01:12:31,374 Mark: He's back at the office. 1366 01:12:31,457 --> 01:12:33,165 He's at your office? 1367 01:12:33,249 --> 01:12:34,457 Mark: Yeah, they couldn't find a place 1368 01:12:34,540 --> 01:12:36,332 for him last night, so they brought him back. 1369 01:12:36,415 --> 01:12:39,374 Okay, so, um, so what happens now? 1370 01:12:40,332 --> 01:12:43,374 (Mark speaks indistinctly) 1371 01:12:43,457 --> 01:12:46,249 Oh, is there a number where I can call, so I can-- 1372 01:12:46,332 --> 01:12:48,040 'Cause I need to make sure that he's okay, 1373 01:12:48,123 --> 01:12:49,831 and I need to be able to keep in touch with him, 1374 01:12:49,915 --> 01:12:51,748 'cause I don't want him lost in the system. 1375 01:12:51,831 --> 01:12:54,374 Mark: I can't hear you. You gotta speak up. What now? 1376 01:12:54,457 --> 01:12:56,374 I don't want him lost in the system, 1377 01:12:56,457 --> 01:12:58,165 so I would like a number or something 1378 01:12:58,249 --> 01:13:01,748 where I can keep up, you know, where he's at. 1379 01:13:04,082 --> 01:13:06,040 ♪ ♪ 1380 01:13:06,123 --> 01:13:07,706 (sniffling) 1381 01:13:22,957 --> 01:13:25,748 ♪ ♪ 1382 01:13:25,831 --> 01:13:28,207 (geese squawking) 1383 01:13:38,332 --> 01:13:40,415 (indistinct chattering) 1384 01:13:50,581 --> 01:13:53,207 William: Do you know what jail is really like? 1385 01:13:54,249 --> 01:13:55,374 Do you have any clue? 1386 01:13:56,249 --> 01:13:57,665 Edie: I've seen some shows. 1387 01:13:57,748 --> 01:13:58,706 William: Yeah. 1388 01:13:58,790 --> 01:14:01,665 Edie: Jail is almost like... 1389 01:14:01,748 --> 01:14:04,831 punishment more than it is a place to get better. 1390 01:14:04,915 --> 01:14:06,207 William: I know. 1391 01:14:06,290 --> 01:14:09,374 'Cause in jail, you have to do hard work. 1392 01:14:09,457 --> 01:14:11,540 You have to work for the cops. 1393 01:14:11,623 --> 01:14:13,748 So basically in jail, you basically become 1394 01:14:13,831 --> 01:14:16,457 a slave... to the community. 1395 01:14:16,540 --> 01:14:17,540 Edie: Mm-hmm. 1396 01:14:17,623 --> 01:14:20,374 William: What they do is basically just slavery. 1397 01:14:20,457 --> 01:14:22,706 It's overnight slavery. 1398 01:14:22,790 --> 01:14:24,332 Edie: It's kind of true, honey. 1399 01:14:25,790 --> 01:14:28,207 And I think part of the reason there's a jail, honey... 1400 01:14:28,290 --> 01:14:31,207 Yeah? ...is to keep people like that... 1401 01:14:31,290 --> 01:14:32,290 Yeah? 1402 01:14:33,915 --> 01:14:35,998 ...away from the public, 1403 01:14:36,082 --> 01:14:37,581 to keep the public safe... 1404 01:14:37,665 --> 01:14:39,290 Yeah. ...from people like that. 1405 01:14:39,374 --> 01:14:41,581 That's what I think. Okay. 1406 01:14:43,790 --> 01:14:45,748 Edie: He's fascinated with jail. 1407 01:14:45,831 --> 01:14:49,040 I think, on some level, he feels like some day he'll be there, 1408 01:14:49,123 --> 01:14:51,540 and so its almost like he's preparing himself. 1409 01:14:51,623 --> 01:14:53,207 Um... 1410 01:14:53,290 --> 01:14:56,915 And because he knows that his behaviors... 1411 01:14:56,998 --> 01:14:59,540 would be jail behaviors if he wasn't special needs. 1412 01:14:59,623 --> 01:15:03,957 There's gonna come a time where they're not gonna give him that kind of grace. 1413 01:15:10,415 --> 01:15:12,706 (groaning) 1414 01:15:12,790 --> 01:15:14,499 Are you all right? 1415 01:15:14,581 --> 01:15:15,831 Get away! (woman screams) 1416 01:15:15,915 --> 01:15:18,748 Man: Look at that. He looks like a girl... 1417 01:15:18,831 --> 01:15:21,290 Elexa: Yeah, in this video he does. 1418 01:15:21,374 --> 01:15:23,499 Yeah. That's where we were hiding, Elexa. 1419 01:15:23,581 --> 01:15:26,748 Elexa: That must hurt so bad. Ethan: A cat? 1420 01:15:26,831 --> 01:15:29,082 ("Thriller" playing) All right. 1421 01:15:32,665 --> 01:15:34,665 (animal howls) 1422 01:15:36,957 --> 01:15:39,831 Stacy: I'm 20 weeks, five months. 1423 01:15:41,207 --> 01:15:43,207 Still kind of surreal really. 1424 01:15:43,290 --> 01:15:46,873 I'm only just barely starting to feel her move and... 1425 01:15:46,957 --> 01:15:48,790 Either way, it's a very big gap 1426 01:15:48,873 --> 01:15:50,207 between the two kids I have now, 1427 01:15:50,290 --> 01:15:53,748 so, it just feels all brand-new again. 1428 01:15:53,831 --> 01:15:57,165 He has not laid a hand on me, anything like he ever did before 1429 01:15:57,249 --> 01:15:58,790 since I told him I was pregnant. 1430 01:15:58,873 --> 01:16:00,457 He has really shown a lot of strength. 1431 01:16:00,540 --> 01:16:02,873 I mean, I've... I've got him in situations 1432 01:16:02,957 --> 01:16:05,290 where normally he would've-- he would flip out on me, 1433 01:16:05,374 --> 01:16:07,748 and he's really showed a lot of restraint. 1434 01:16:09,873 --> 01:16:11,706 Bail Bonds. (phone beeps, ringing) 1435 01:16:11,790 --> 01:16:15,165 Hold on just a moment. Bail Bonds. 1436 01:16:15,249 --> 01:16:16,790 You know, I'm brutally honest about things, 1437 01:16:16,873 --> 01:16:18,540 and I really don't try to sugarcoat anything, 1438 01:16:18,623 --> 01:16:21,499 and I don't try to hide anything, and I... 1439 01:16:21,581 --> 01:16:23,957 I'm not gonna say he's a hundred percent better. He's not. 1440 01:16:24,040 --> 01:16:25,290 I'm really happy that he-- 1441 01:16:25,374 --> 01:16:27,665 I feel like he's come a little ways. 1442 01:16:27,748 --> 01:16:30,457 I just am being honest that he still has a long ways to go. 1443 01:16:30,540 --> 01:16:34,623 You know, I don't think I'm doing anything so different 1444 01:16:34,706 --> 01:16:37,581 as far as how I'm talking to him or the way I am with him... 1445 01:16:37,665 --> 01:16:41,374 but he's becoming a little calmer at times, 1446 01:16:41,457 --> 01:16:43,332 and, I don't know, we changed his medicine too, so. 1447 01:16:43,415 --> 01:16:45,748 I think the medicine he's on now is a lot better, 1448 01:16:45,831 --> 01:16:50,165 and I think that probably is playing a little bit of a part in it as well, 1449 01:16:50,249 --> 01:16:51,457 um... 1450 01:16:51,540 --> 01:16:53,457 but I'm sure it's a combination of everything. 1451 01:16:53,540 --> 01:16:56,581 ♪ ♪ 1452 01:17:19,706 --> 01:17:21,748 Cora: I worry about him a lot. 1453 01:17:22,873 --> 01:17:24,873 Especially if he's getting-- 1454 01:17:24,957 --> 01:17:27,540 wherever he's getting these toy guns from. 1455 01:17:27,623 --> 01:17:31,374 What I'm afraid of is because he's tall and-- 1456 01:17:31,457 --> 01:17:34,123 and Vontae, because of his height, 1457 01:17:34,207 --> 01:17:36,790 can be very intimidating to other people, 1458 01:17:36,873 --> 01:17:41,249 so I'm afraid that they're gonna take the wrong perception of him 1459 01:17:41,332 --> 01:17:43,957 because of his height and his record 1460 01:17:44,040 --> 01:17:45,665 and all the trouble that he gets into, 1461 01:17:45,748 --> 01:17:49,540 and he's going around, carrying toy guns and stuff like that. 1462 01:17:49,623 --> 01:17:51,040 Oh God. 1463 01:17:52,665 --> 01:17:54,457 I don't like-- I don't like it. 1464 01:17:54,540 --> 01:17:56,332 I don't like it. 1465 01:17:58,623 --> 01:18:03,082 I'm like at a place now where I can help my kids. 1466 01:18:03,165 --> 01:18:06,207 You know, now I can be, I can be... 1467 01:18:06,290 --> 01:18:08,915 I feel like now I can be a mom. 1468 01:18:08,998 --> 01:18:10,748 You know, I can be a mom now, 1469 01:18:10,831 --> 01:18:13,415 and I want Vontae to experience that. 1470 01:18:13,499 --> 01:18:16,040 I want him to see the-- be able to experience 1471 01:18:16,123 --> 01:18:18,040 the new side of me, 1472 01:18:18,123 --> 01:18:20,207 because I think it would help him. 1473 01:18:20,290 --> 01:18:23,332 ♪ ♪ 1474 01:18:31,581 --> 01:18:35,207 Woman: What's your-- what's your biggest fear for William? 1475 01:18:36,457 --> 01:18:39,415 An accident... something like that. 1476 01:18:39,499 --> 01:18:41,415 That makes me cry, yeah. 1477 01:18:42,957 --> 01:18:43,998 Yeah. 1478 01:18:45,040 --> 01:18:46,831 That I'll get a call... 1479 01:18:51,040 --> 01:18:52,790 So... 1480 01:18:52,873 --> 01:18:56,374 You know, when he threatens, sometimes, you know, cutting himself-- 1481 01:18:56,457 --> 01:18:58,665 what if he does it too hard one time? 1482 01:18:58,748 --> 01:19:02,457 Um... or, uh... 1483 01:19:02,540 --> 01:19:04,706 he's hanging out with kids that are no good for him 1484 01:19:04,790 --> 01:19:06,374 and something goes wrong? 1485 01:19:06,457 --> 01:19:10,748 Um... So, he's like a lamb. You know, he's innocent. 1486 01:19:10,831 --> 01:19:13,249 (indistinct chatter) 1487 01:19:15,540 --> 01:19:19,332 Edie: In my most hopeful moments, I see a brilliant mind. 1488 01:19:19,415 --> 01:19:22,998 I see... a sweetheart... 1489 01:19:23,082 --> 01:19:25,457 and I see somebody that is so unique 1490 01:19:25,540 --> 01:19:29,915 that there's nobody on the face of the Earth like him, and... 1491 01:19:31,415 --> 01:19:36,207 if we could somehow channel that into something creative 1492 01:19:36,290 --> 01:19:38,831 that he can actually make a living for himself, 1493 01:19:38,915 --> 01:19:40,915 and then he can maybe live... 1494 01:19:40,998 --> 01:19:45,374 you know in a carriage house behind our house or something, 1495 01:19:45,457 --> 01:19:46,998 and actually have a decent life. 1496 01:19:47,082 --> 01:19:50,249 You know, maybe even go to college or something like that. 1497 01:19:52,831 --> 01:19:55,706 In those moments, I'm hopeful for him, 1498 01:19:55,790 --> 01:19:57,790 you know, when I dream that. 1499 01:19:57,873 --> 01:20:03,873 So... cautiously hopeless or hopeful, yeah. 1500 01:20:03,957 --> 01:20:05,165 So... 1501 01:20:07,706 --> 01:20:10,748 ♪ ♪ 1502 01:20:27,207 --> 01:20:28,957 Liza: As I looked at Adam's path 1503 01:20:29,040 --> 01:20:30,374 and the trajectory he was on, 1504 01:20:30,457 --> 01:20:32,790 it was so similar to my son's, 1505 01:20:32,873 --> 01:20:36,123 and the only thing where it started to change 1506 01:20:36,207 --> 01:20:38,040 was with my blog post, 1507 01:20:38,123 --> 01:20:39,915 when I screamed to the world 1508 01:20:39,998 --> 01:20:42,665 and said, "Hi, I need help. 1509 01:20:42,748 --> 01:20:45,499 All of our-- all of these moms, we all need help." 1510 01:20:45,581 --> 01:20:48,457 There is a sort of politics 1511 01:20:48,540 --> 01:20:51,873 and a reality that are often in conflict. 1512 01:20:51,957 --> 01:20:54,581 Most people with mental illnesses, 1513 01:20:54,665 --> 01:20:56,915 most people with autism, 1514 01:20:56,998 --> 01:21:00,249 most people with any of this variety of conditions, 1515 01:21:00,332 --> 01:21:03,040 which we largely describe as brain diseases 1516 01:21:03,123 --> 01:21:05,665 of one kind or another, will never hurt anyone. 1517 01:21:05,748 --> 01:21:09,831 If we talk too much about those dangerous situations, 1518 01:21:09,915 --> 01:21:11,915 we stigmatize people we shouldn't. 1519 01:21:11,998 --> 01:21:14,082 If we take a politically correct standpoint 1520 01:21:14,165 --> 01:21:16,332 and we don't acknowledge those situations, 1521 01:21:16,415 --> 01:21:19,123 then we end up with families in which a child is 1522 01:21:19,207 --> 01:21:21,790 terrifying and violent and nobody believes them, 1523 01:21:21,873 --> 01:21:24,499 and they don't understand what it is they have to deal with. 1524 01:21:24,581 --> 01:21:27,540 It's a very fine balance we need to strike. 1525 01:21:27,623 --> 01:21:30,123 I think what we forget most of all 1526 01:21:30,207 --> 01:21:32,082 when someone is violent 1527 01:21:32,165 --> 01:21:35,499 and when they have a serious mental illness, 1528 01:21:35,581 --> 01:21:37,290 is that we've failed them. 1529 01:21:37,374 --> 01:21:39,748 It's a little bit like if someone had diabetes 1530 01:21:39,831 --> 01:21:41,332 and they go into a coma. 1531 01:21:41,415 --> 01:21:43,415 That's part of the illness, right? 1532 01:21:43,499 --> 01:21:45,831 But if they get treated, that should never happen-- 1533 01:21:45,915 --> 01:21:47,290 if they get treated well, 1534 01:21:47,374 --> 01:21:50,457 and that's where we've-- we've let people down. 1535 01:21:50,540 --> 01:21:54,123 We need to understand that treatment before tragedy 1536 01:21:54,207 --> 01:21:58,457 is not only possible, but it should become our reality. 1537 01:21:58,540 --> 01:22:02,748 And that's-- it's gonna take some tough conversations. 1538 01:22:02,831 --> 01:22:04,249 ♪ ♪ 1539 01:22:04,332 --> 01:22:06,873 Liza: This is about helping people who are suffering, 1540 01:22:06,957 --> 01:22:11,332 and we know that if we can get children treatment, 1541 01:22:11,415 --> 01:22:13,040 we can change the whole course, 1542 01:22:13,123 --> 01:22:14,915 not only of a child's life, 1543 01:22:14,998 --> 01:22:16,998 but of an entire family's life. 1544 01:22:17,082 --> 01:22:20,082 Stacy: Oh, over here. What kind of penguins are there? 1545 01:22:20,165 --> 01:22:22,998 Hi, penguin. Stacy: Hey. I wish one of them would go in right now. 1546 01:22:23,082 --> 01:22:24,374 Ethan: Hey, Mom, watch. 1547 01:22:24,457 --> 01:22:26,165 Stacy: Absolutely. I see. Elexa: Look at the-- 1548 01:22:26,249 --> 01:22:28,165 Ethan: Look, I see one over there. 1549 01:22:28,249 --> 01:22:29,748 Good afternoon. 1550 01:22:31,040 --> 01:22:32,790 It's always polite to say that. 1551 01:22:32,873 --> 01:22:34,374 You want a taste? 1552 01:22:35,957 --> 01:22:37,873 Mmm. You're welcome. 1553 01:22:39,415 --> 01:22:42,540 I wouldn't go to heaven if I didn't share. 1554 01:22:42,623 --> 01:22:44,332 Mm-mmm. 1555 01:22:44,415 --> 01:22:46,499 If I don't share, I can't go to heaven. 1556 01:22:46,581 --> 01:22:48,998 No, I can't, actually. 1557 01:22:49,082 --> 01:22:51,082 Well, you know why? 1558 01:22:51,165 --> 01:22:53,665 Because in hell, they're controlling you. 1559 01:22:53,748 --> 01:22:55,540 Here you want me to hold yours? 1560 01:22:55,623 --> 01:22:57,831 Stacy: Well, that's very nice of you, Ethan. 1561 01:22:57,915 --> 01:23:00,540 Here, let me see the spoon. Do you want-- do you want-- 1562 01:23:00,623 --> 01:23:03,790 sorry. Oh, 'cause you want to play with it? 1563 01:23:05,665 --> 01:23:06,665 Elexa: Mmm! 1564 01:23:06,748 --> 01:23:10,457 ♪ ♪ 1565 01:23:45,915 --> 01:23:47,957 ♪ ♪ 1566 01:24:26,873 --> 01:24:28,831 ♪ ♪ 1567 01:24:52,790 --> 01:24:55,790 ♪ ♪ 1568 01:25:18,873 --> 01:25:22,123 (firecracker sizzles, pops)