1
00:00:12,570 --> 00:00:13,790
Yes, thank you.

2
00:00:14,070 --> 00:00:15,250
I'll get right back to you.

3
00:00:16,010 --> 00:00:17,010
You'll never believe this.

4
00:00:17,330 --> 00:00:20,310
Harvey Zack, the editor of the Glen
Falls Gazette, just offered me a job.

5
00:00:20,690 --> 00:00:22,570
Really, Hope? A paper route at your age?

6
00:00:22,850 --> 00:00:24,170
That is so lame.

7
00:00:24,850 --> 00:00:26,310
You're getting a paper route?

8
00:00:26,890 --> 00:00:29,450
Dilly, your mother's not getting a paper
route.

9
00:00:29,990 --> 00:00:30,988
Are you?

10
00:00:30,990 --> 00:00:31,990
No.

11
00:00:32,470 --> 00:00:35,990
Apparently, Mr. Zack has been so
impressed with my letters to the editor,

12
00:00:35,990 --> 00:00:37,410
offering me my own column.

13
00:00:38,010 --> 00:00:39,590
Life in the carpool lane.

14
00:00:39,830 --> 00:00:41,190
Or they could call it...

15
00:00:44,329 --> 00:00:45,329
That's great.

16
00:00:45,510 --> 00:00:49,310
It was always your mother's dream to be
a journalist. In fact, right after we

17
00:00:49,310 --> 00:00:52,370
got married, she got an offer to go work
at the Chicago Tribune.

18
00:00:52,630 --> 00:00:54,790
Mom, I think you should totally take the
job.

19
00:00:55,010 --> 00:00:56,430
But what about the Great American Bake
Sale?

20
00:00:56,930 --> 00:00:58,910
I'm the only one who knows how to make
pecan sandies.

21
00:00:59,930 --> 00:01:02,430
Don't worry. We'll follow your recipe to
the letter.

22
00:01:02,770 --> 00:01:05,770
Oh, that's the decoy recipe, in case we
ever get robbed.

23
00:01:06,210 --> 00:01:08,370
The real one's right up here.

24
00:01:09,890 --> 00:01:11,110
Let's keep that on the down low.

25
00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:13,680
We don't want the cookie elves torturing
it out of you.

26
00:01:15,020 --> 00:01:16,840
Honey, you're a great writer.

27
00:01:17,080 --> 00:01:18,340
You should take the job.

28
00:01:18,680 --> 00:01:20,780
I already have a job that I love.

29
00:01:21,060 --> 00:01:23,120
But don't you want to do something
important in the world?

30
00:01:23,440 --> 00:01:24,440
Whoa, whoa, whoa.

31
00:01:24,540 --> 00:01:27,340
Your mother has plenty of important
things to do around here.

32
00:01:27,780 --> 00:01:31,960
Like making my breakfast, folding my
laundry, folding my hand mirror while I

33
00:01:31,960 --> 00:01:33,040
pluck out my ingrown hairs.

34
00:01:36,160 --> 00:01:37,340
Hello? Mr. Zack?

35
00:01:37,540 --> 00:01:38,378
Hope Shanowski.

36
00:01:38,380 --> 00:01:39,480
I'd love to take the job.

37
00:01:39,880 --> 00:01:41,860
Fine. Take the stupid job.

38
00:01:42,420 --> 00:01:47,300
Justin, upstairs. Now, you, my friend,
are going to get acquainted with the

39
00:01:47,300 --> 00:01:48,300
tweezer.

40
00:01:48,500 --> 00:01:50,080
I want a bigger language.

41
00:01:52,180 --> 00:01:57,080
You know we don't have to talk about it.
We've got our different ways.

42
00:01:57,700 --> 00:02:02,960
But you know in the end we can laugh
about it. Even though we can drive each

43
00:02:02,960 --> 00:02:03,960
other crazy.

44
00:02:15,120 --> 00:02:16,620
I just want to thank you for such a
wonderful opportunity.

45
00:02:16,940 --> 00:02:19,880
I think you'll find that I'm a hard
worker, very enthusiastic, full of

46
00:02:20,020 --> 00:02:21,020
and I have a positive attitude.

47
00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:23,880
My mother used to say, it's not what
happens to you in life, it's your

48
00:02:23,880 --> 00:02:26,500
toward it. Why don't you save a little
something for the column?

49
00:02:27,780 --> 00:02:29,560
Now, for your first topic.

50
00:02:30,820 --> 00:02:31,820
Tattoos for teens.

51
00:02:32,280 --> 00:02:33,720
Yay or nay?

52
00:02:34,220 --> 00:02:35,400
Ah, that's easy.

53
00:02:35,700 --> 00:02:38,440
My daughter Sydney's friend Sally got a
tattoo without telling her mother Cindy,

54
00:02:38,640 --> 00:02:42,260
but Susie Sally's sister told Cindy
after Sally suffered a serious

55
00:02:42,260 --> 00:02:44,100
Nay.

56
00:02:44,820 --> 00:02:46,200
I want it by 5 o 'clock tomorrow.

57
00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:47,560
You got it? Yay.

58
00:02:48,100 --> 00:02:49,100
Sir.

59
00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:51,000
You dropped a little.

60
00:02:51,060 --> 00:02:52,060
There.

61
00:02:52,400 --> 00:02:53,400
I got it.

62
00:03:32,490 --> 00:03:35,230
If you're bucking for a promotion,
you're not flashing your good end.

63
00:03:36,710 --> 00:03:38,090
What are you doing here?

64
00:03:38,350 --> 00:03:40,950
I thought you'd like to take me out to
lunch to celebrate your first day on the

65
00:03:40,950 --> 00:03:42,410
job. It's 9 .30.

66
00:03:43,010 --> 00:03:44,390
Lunch isn't for another three hours.

67
00:03:44,750 --> 00:03:45,728
Okay, I'll wait.

68
00:03:45,730 --> 00:03:46,730
You can't wait.

69
00:03:46,930 --> 00:03:49,930
Fine. I'll just go have a few drinks,
come back and make out with your boss.

70
00:03:51,250 --> 00:03:52,250
Fine.

71
00:03:53,850 --> 00:03:54,850
You can stay.

72
00:03:55,250 --> 00:03:57,170
But you have to be quiet. I promise.

73
00:03:57,870 --> 00:03:59,370
I'll be as quiet as a church moose.

74
00:04:01,590 --> 00:04:02,590
Mouth.

75
00:04:02,670 --> 00:04:03,670
a church mouse.

76
00:04:03,750 --> 00:04:06,250
That doesn't make any sense. Why would
there be a mouse in church?

77
00:04:07,610 --> 00:04:08,650
Why would there be a moose?

78
00:04:10,170 --> 00:04:13,750
That's the whole point, Hope. If there
was a moose in church, people would

79
00:04:13,750 --> 00:04:15,150
notice, so it would have to be quiet.

80
00:04:17,110 --> 00:04:20,230
Fine. Be quiet as the church moose
thing.

81
00:04:35,020 --> 00:04:38,540
What? Justin said I could have him. I
can't believe I have to tell you this,

82
00:04:38,540 --> 00:04:39,820
no blowing bubbles.

83
00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:43,760
Fine.

84
00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:46,640
Church moves.

85
00:05:15,600 --> 00:05:16,780
and played with this thing in months.

86
00:05:19,980 --> 00:05:20,980
Mm.

87
00:05:28,780 --> 00:05:29,759
Mm.

88
00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:32,460
Those pecans, Sandy, smell delicious.

89
00:05:32,960 --> 00:05:33,960
Mm.

90
00:05:34,920 --> 00:05:35,920
Oh.

91
00:05:37,620 --> 00:05:41,600
Sidney, you do know you're supposed to
take the pecans out of the shell.

92
00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:45,640
But we use real... sand, right?

93
00:05:46,280 --> 00:05:50,800
Who stole my bubbles?

94
00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:58,580
Hey, there's my working girl. How was
your first day on the job? Oh,

95
00:06:00,260 --> 00:06:02,380
Justin, draw my bath.

96
00:06:02,820 --> 00:06:04,680
Oh, and make it a bubble bath.

97
00:06:05,680 --> 00:06:07,880
I knew it was an inside job.

98
00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:12,980
Faith came to work with you? You didn't
tell me they had daycare.

99
00:06:15,340 --> 00:06:17,220
First day on the job, and I got nothing
done.

100
00:06:18,020 --> 00:06:19,080
What am I going to do tomorrow?

101
00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:21,120
I got it.

102
00:06:21,300 --> 00:06:24,140
We'll get a sledgehammer and some rope,
and we'll keep her in the bed like that

103
00:06:24,140 --> 00:06:25,140
guy in Misery.

104
00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:27,600
Faith!

105
00:06:30,720 --> 00:06:34,440
What is it? I had a really hard day at
the office, and I need to decompose.

106
00:06:35,840 --> 00:06:40,800
Listen, the thing about my job is, it's
my job.

107
00:06:41,160 --> 00:06:44,440
Which means tomorrow, you're staying
home. But home is boring.

108
00:06:46,310 --> 00:06:49,310
Maybe. And I know this is a radical
suggestion.

109
00:06:49,990 --> 00:06:51,870
You can get your own job.

110
00:06:52,710 --> 00:06:53,710
My own job?

111
00:06:54,190 --> 00:06:55,129
Mm -hmm.

112
00:06:55,130 --> 00:07:02,050
Your own office, your own space, and
your own... booth.

113
00:07:07,090 --> 00:07:08,090
Excuse me.

114
00:07:15,980 --> 00:07:16,980
Excuse me?

115
00:07:17,140 --> 00:07:21,840
Is it that I'm trying to work here and
your music is just a goof too loud?

116
00:07:22,340 --> 00:07:23,340
Hey, co -worker!

117
00:07:25,020 --> 00:07:26,180
Guess who got a job?

118
00:07:26,440 --> 00:07:28,760
Who? Me! Where? Here! No!

119
00:07:29,020 --> 00:07:30,020
Yes!

120
00:07:35,300 --> 00:07:39,360
You're working here? Yep. I'm on the
beat. Stopped my own column.

121
00:07:39,580 --> 00:07:42,980
Went up to Mr. Zack's office and told
him on a fascinating idea. Point,

122
00:07:42,980 --> 00:07:46,710
counterpoint. The carpool lane meets
the... DAR pooling.

123
00:07:47,890 --> 00:07:49,110
You're not qualified.

124
00:07:49,630 --> 00:07:51,190
You haven't written a word in your life.

125
00:07:51,750 --> 00:07:54,930
Not according to my impeccable resume.

126
00:07:56,150 --> 00:07:57,570
First off, it's resume.

127
00:07:57,970 --> 00:08:00,390
And second, you're not Anchor 2020.

128
00:08:00,870 --> 00:08:03,630
Well, this reference letter from Hugh
Downs makes it different.

129
00:08:04,930 --> 00:08:06,270
Faith Anchor 2020.

130
00:08:06,570 --> 00:08:07,570
I swear.

131
00:08:09,390 --> 00:08:11,690
Sincerely, Hugh Downs.

132
00:08:12,390 --> 00:08:14,470
Ooh, we're late for the staff meeting.

133
00:08:14,840 --> 00:08:15,479
staff meeting.

134
00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:17,160
Hey, Judy! Debbie!

135
00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:20,580
Meet my sister, Hope. She's helping me
out with my column.

136
00:08:21,500 --> 00:08:22,500
So, Faith.

137
00:08:22,620 --> 00:08:27,460
What's Barbara Walters really like?
Well, working with a legend is very

138
00:08:27,460 --> 00:08:30,580
intimidating. But eventually, she got
over it.

139
00:08:32,059 --> 00:08:33,140
I'll tell you one thing.

140
00:08:33,380 --> 00:08:34,640
You'll never beat her in foosball.

141
00:08:36,120 --> 00:08:38,440
She's got the wrists of an 18 -year -old
frat boy.

142
00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:46,940
faces in the editorial page.

143
00:08:47,800 --> 00:08:50,220
Faith Fairfield and her sister.

144
00:08:52,200 --> 00:08:53,560
Let's give it up for the H -man.

145
00:08:55,780 --> 00:09:00,700
You know, I can't say that I've ever
worked for a newspaper or even read one,

146
00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:01,760
for that matter.

147
00:09:02,180 --> 00:09:06,960
But I'm a big fan in Freedom of the
Press and the freedom to knock a few

148
00:09:06,960 --> 00:09:09,140
lunch. Now, who's up for PJ
McGillicuddy?

149
00:09:18,320 --> 00:09:19,320
room when the check comes.

150
00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:24,460
Oh, would you like to say a few words?

151
00:09:25,120 --> 00:09:29,820
Just that I'm really looking forward to
a positive work experience and making a

152
00:09:29,820 --> 00:09:33,560
real difference and... What's up with
Wally's hat?

153
00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:40,280
He was kicked in the head by a horse.

154
00:09:40,700 --> 00:09:41,860
He almost died.

155
00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:43,240
Operation.

156
00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:45,540
But he's still a cheap ass...

157
00:09:54,640 --> 00:09:56,620
But you can't make him pay for lunch.

158
00:09:58,240 --> 00:09:59,240
Again?

159
00:10:00,440 --> 00:10:01,440
With the horse?

160
00:10:01,540 --> 00:10:02,800
What is wrong with you?

161
00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:05,160
That's all right, Wally.

162
00:10:05,520 --> 00:10:06,580
The hat looks great.

163
00:10:07,520 --> 00:10:09,180
Considering it only cost him two bucks?

164
00:10:11,700 --> 00:10:14,100
Okay. You make everything okay.

165
00:10:52,170 --> 00:10:52,989
Want to read it to me?

166
00:10:52,990 --> 00:10:55,950
Fake. I am trying to concentrate.

167
00:10:58,670 --> 00:11:01,070
Hey, have you had your byline photo
taken yet?

168
00:11:01,590 --> 00:11:02,610
Yeah. Where is it?

169
00:11:03,510 --> 00:11:05,070
Right here. Can I see it? No.

170
00:11:05,390 --> 00:11:06,049
Want to see mine?

171
00:11:06,050 --> 00:11:08,030
No. Want to see me see mine?

172
00:11:10,750 --> 00:11:11,750
Which do you like?

173
00:11:12,810 --> 00:11:14,990
Saucy, bossy, or glossy?

174
00:12:05,360 --> 00:12:06,079
That's your business.

175
00:12:06,080 --> 00:12:10,300
But they don't pay us to goof off. They
pay us to work. And I take my work very

176
00:12:10,300 --> 00:12:12,620
seriously. Oh, come on. Have some fun.

177
00:12:13,060 --> 00:12:13,879
This is work.

178
00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:15,220
Work isn't supposed to be fun.

179
00:12:16,560 --> 00:12:17,560
What if you're a clown?

180
00:12:17,680 --> 00:12:18,680
We're not clowns!

181
00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:21,160
All right, fine. You win.

182
00:12:21,500 --> 00:12:23,620
Let's just photocopy our butts and get
out of here.

183
00:12:39,440 --> 00:12:41,720
and I'll leave you alone the rest of the
day.

184
00:12:42,260 --> 00:12:43,260
No!

185
00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:45,720
Come on, Miss Jackson.

186
00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:47,600
Show me your pie pies.

187
00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:53,280
I do this.

188
00:12:54,900 --> 00:12:57,140
Do you promise to leave me alone?

189
00:12:57,380 --> 00:12:58,380
I promise.

190
00:13:00,160 --> 00:13:01,160
Ridiculous.

191
00:13:02,580 --> 00:13:05,500
All right, girl. Get your face in there,
too. What?

192
00:13:45,290 --> 00:13:46,290
this home to Charlie.

193
00:13:47,870 --> 00:13:49,550
Now, I'm going back to work.

194
00:13:50,130 --> 00:13:51,130
Alone.

195
00:13:51,830 --> 00:13:53,110
Hey, um, shut that door.

196
00:13:53,470 --> 00:13:55,370
I'm going to get a jump start on my
Christmas cards.

197
00:14:01,430 --> 00:14:05,150
Hey, Hope, can you move your car? You're
blocking Mr. Zackhead. Oh, sure. Right

198
00:14:05,150 --> 00:14:06,150
away.

199
00:14:12,390 --> 00:14:13,390
Hey!

200
00:14:13,450 --> 00:14:14,470
Need your byline photo.

201
00:14:14,750 --> 00:14:15,750
Oh, sure. Right here.

202
00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:18,510
Don't hate me because I'm beautiful.

203
00:14:19,210 --> 00:14:20,210
Oh,

204
00:14:20,990 --> 00:14:23,430
do you have hers? Because we're going to
press in an hour. Oh, yeah.

205
00:14:23,950 --> 00:14:25,070
It's right here.

206
00:14:26,230 --> 00:14:27,230
There you go.

207
00:14:28,670 --> 00:14:32,210
Oh, and, um... Merry Christmas.

208
00:14:46,410 --> 00:14:47,410
Champagne?

209
00:14:47,630 --> 00:14:48,830
But I already brushed my teeth.

210
00:14:50,650 --> 00:14:52,790
We haven't had a chance to celebrate my
new job.

211
00:14:53,350 --> 00:14:57,490
But I thought you were down on it now
that old Crazy Tunes is working there

212
00:14:58,850 --> 00:15:00,970
I'm at peace with that. Anyway, enough
about her.

213
00:15:01,350 --> 00:15:02,990
Tonight, it's about us.

214
00:15:28,680 --> 00:15:29,680
Mm -hmm.

215
00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:31,860
So I made you a little present.

216
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:38,120
What do you think?

217
00:15:38,900 --> 00:15:39,900
It's cute.

218
00:15:42,540 --> 00:15:43,519
That's all?

219
00:15:43,520 --> 00:15:47,160
Well, it's better than your passport and
not as good as your driver's license.

220
00:16:05,860 --> 00:16:07,400
SportsCenter. Stop the president!

221
00:16:08,300 --> 00:16:09,640
I've always wanted to say that.

222
00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:11,000
Man overboard!

223
00:16:11,240 --> 00:16:12,500
I've always wanted to say that, too.

224
00:16:12,740 --> 00:16:14,120
Mayday! Mayday!

225
00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:16,740
There's been a terrible mistake.

226
00:16:16,980 --> 00:16:19,720
You're about to publish the wrong
picture. The very wrong picture.

227
00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:20,699
Too late.

228
00:16:20,700 --> 00:16:21,840
We're already printing.

229
00:17:53,350 --> 00:17:54,350
To get away from you.

230
00:17:57,110 --> 00:17:58,110
I don't understand.

231
00:17:59,010 --> 00:18:00,450
Why would you want to get away from me?

232
00:18:01,390 --> 00:18:02,390
I'm a blast.

233
00:18:02,830 --> 00:18:05,210
There's a three -week waiting list just
to be my lunch buddy.

234
00:18:06,890 --> 00:18:08,230
But heck, you don't want to be with me.

235
00:18:08,870 --> 00:18:09,870
It's not that.

236
00:18:11,170 --> 00:18:18,070
I love being with you. It's just... Just
not all the time.

237
00:18:19,690 --> 00:18:21,910
This job was supposed to be for me.

238
00:18:22,510 --> 00:18:23,630
So I could feel special.

239
00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:29,630
Sometimes I feel like all I am is a
mother and a wife.

240
00:18:30,490 --> 00:18:33,550
But on my own, I'm just a big loser.

241
00:18:34,450 --> 00:18:35,450
A big nobody.

242
00:18:36,330 --> 00:18:37,330
No.

243
00:18:37,690 --> 00:18:39,470
You are not a nobody.

244
00:18:40,470 --> 00:18:42,790
You're Faith Fairfield's sister.

245
00:18:48,370 --> 00:18:51,010
And no one can ever take that away from
you.

246
00:18:57,290 --> 00:19:00,770
Remember how Dad used to say that Mom
was the hub of the wheel and we were all

247
00:19:00,770 --> 00:19:01,770
boat?

248
00:19:01,970 --> 00:19:02,970
Well, that's you.

249
00:19:03,290 --> 00:19:04,470
With Charlie and the kids.

250
00:19:04,970 --> 00:19:05,970
And me.

251
00:19:06,470 --> 00:19:08,070
We make all of our lives turn.

252
00:19:09,550 --> 00:19:12,790
If that's not contributing something to
the world, I don't know what is.

253
00:19:15,550 --> 00:19:16,550
You know something?

254
00:19:18,010 --> 00:19:20,170
I didn't even want this stupid job.

255
00:19:21,250 --> 00:19:22,250
Me either.

256
00:19:23,170 --> 00:19:24,730
I only did it to be with you.

257
00:19:26,060 --> 00:19:27,540
I don't even care about the company car.

258
00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:32,820
You're getting a company car?

259
00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:34,160
What? No.

260
00:19:35,560 --> 00:19:37,220
Let me see if there's a reverse switch.

261
00:19:39,680 --> 00:19:40,680
Oh, my God!

262
00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:42,380
I'm stuck, too.

263
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:48,000
Do you find the vibration of this
machine strangely erotic? No.