1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:06,000 This programme contains adult humour, scenes of a sexual nature from the start and very strong language 2 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:10,400 SIGHING AND KISSING 3 00:00:16,760 --> 00:00:19,120 Oh, dear! Oh, Ty, no, no, no, no, no. 4 00:00:19,120 --> 00:00:21,480 Oh, God! Oh, my God! I'm so sorry! Whoa, whoa! 5 00:00:21,480 --> 00:00:23,040 CLATTER 6 00:00:23,040 --> 00:00:25,480 BUZZING 7 00:00:25,480 --> 00:00:27,920 Right, erm... Uh, maybe knock next time? 8 00:00:27,920 --> 00:00:30,640 Absolutely, yes, yes. Sorry. I will, yeah. 9 00:00:30,640 --> 00:00:33,800 Do you want me back in...seven mins? 10 00:00:33,800 --> 00:00:35,240 12? 11 00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:38,600 Sorry, it's just I know some people can go and go and go. 12 00:00:38,600 --> 00:00:40,440 BUZZING CONTINUES 13 00:00:41,880 --> 00:00:44,440 I think just pop it on the side. Yeah. 14 00:00:44,440 --> 00:00:46,000 BUZZING REVERBERATES 15 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:49,560 Oh, sorry. I'll call you later. Yep! Just keep me in the loop! 16 00:00:59,720 --> 00:01:01,320 Ah! 17 00:01:03,640 --> 00:01:05,640 SHE LAUGHS 18 00:01:10,440 --> 00:01:13,240 I just want to... God, you are everywhere! Ohh! 19 00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:14,640 Thank you. 20 00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:17,480 I do try to make myself both visible and invisible. 21 00:01:17,480 --> 00:01:19,680 Yeah. Definitely visible. 22 00:01:19,680 --> 00:01:21,160 Hey. 23 00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:24,360 I just want you to know I think what you're doing for Freya 24 00:01:24,360 --> 00:01:26,000 is amazing. 25 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:28,240 The whole father-figure thing. 26 00:01:28,240 --> 00:01:31,080 It's so heart-warming. 27 00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:34,440 I mean, if I were a middle-aged, greying, bankruptcy lawyer, 28 00:01:34,440 --> 00:01:37,400 and a hot, young Canadian artist moved in, 29 00:01:37,400 --> 00:01:39,600 I'd be beside myself with insecurity. 30 00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:42,080 But not you! And do you know why? 31 00:01:42,080 --> 00:01:45,480 Because you're one of the good ones, Abe. 32 00:01:45,480 --> 00:01:47,120 Thank you, Ty. 33 00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:48,920 Thank you. 34 00:01:48,920 --> 00:01:50,480 Here, I'll leave you to it. 35 00:01:50,480 --> 00:01:52,640 Oh! Let's try that. 36 00:01:52,640 --> 00:01:55,160 A whole year long distance? 37 00:01:55,160 --> 00:01:58,800 I mean, I struggle with my wax lady being 40 minutes away. 38 00:01:58,800 --> 00:02:01,400 But, I mean, look at you now! Hey? 39 00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:02,960 Miracles. 40 00:02:02,960 --> 00:02:05,800 They happen, people! 41 00:02:05,800 --> 00:02:08,360 Ty, I want to talk to you about last night. 42 00:02:08,360 --> 00:02:09,720 Oh... 43 00:02:09,720 --> 00:02:13,360 It was so cute to see you both enjoying each other's bodies. 44 00:02:13,360 --> 00:02:16,000 Honestly. I mean, I always wondered whether it worked 45 00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:18,200 with you down there. 46 00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:22,320 Oh, it... It works. Yeah, Ty, I don't really think that's.... 47 00:02:22,320 --> 00:02:23,600 CASE CLATTERS 48 00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:25,240 SHE GASPS 49 00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:28,920 Can you actually feel everything? 50 00:02:28,920 --> 00:02:30,160 Everything. 51 00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:32,320 And orgasm too, so... 52 00:02:32,320 --> 00:02:33,960 Wow. 53 00:02:33,960 --> 00:02:36,360 And can Abe feel it too? 54 00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:38,480 DOORBELL RINGS I'll get it! 55 00:02:38,480 --> 00:02:42,400 You know, I once orgasmed in three seconds on just salt alone. 56 00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:45,040 I know, I know. 57 00:02:46,120 --> 00:02:48,440 Abe, hey! Surprise! 58 00:02:48,440 --> 00:02:50,480 You're looking good, man. Hello, Jo. 59 00:02:51,760 --> 00:02:52,960 What you doing? 60 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:57,120 Oh, I'm sorry. I'm early but, you know, I thought I could go home 61 00:02:57,120 --> 00:02:58,960 or, you know, just come straight here. 62 00:02:58,960 --> 00:03:00,320 Or go home. 63 00:03:00,320 --> 00:03:01,760 The party's not for ten hours. 64 00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:04,640 Yeah, but what's, like, ten hours between friends? I mean, right? 65 00:03:04,640 --> 00:03:06,680 SHE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY About ten hours. 66 00:03:06,680 --> 00:03:08,760 Jo? Freya? 67 00:03:10,120 --> 00:03:11,240 Hello! 68 00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:12,720 Freya? 69 00:03:12,720 --> 00:03:15,000 Argh! Oh, my God, Jo! 70 00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:18,680 My God, it's so fucking good to see you. What...?! 71 00:03:18,680 --> 00:03:23,080 Congrats on, um, all your new...life decisions. 72 00:03:23,080 --> 00:03:24,280 Oh, thanks. 73 00:03:24,280 --> 00:03:26,240 I didn't know you were coming! 74 00:03:26,240 --> 00:03:28,040 Hi. I'm Ty. 75 00:03:28,040 --> 00:03:30,120 Freya's personal care assistant. 76 00:03:30,120 --> 00:03:31,840 And friend. Hey, Ty. 77 00:03:31,840 --> 00:03:34,280 Oh! House-warming! 78 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:37,720 Ah! Sorry, the Eurostar didn't have any big ones. 79 00:03:37,720 --> 00:03:39,320 Wow, thank you. 80 00:03:39,320 --> 00:03:42,600 So, how long are you sticking around for? Ugh, dude. 81 00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:45,800 I am literally homeless right now. I had to get the fuck out of Lille. 82 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:48,280 Oh, we'd love to have you stay, right? 83 00:03:51,760 --> 00:03:53,040 Absolutely. 84 00:03:58,920 --> 00:04:02,080 Stop. You're judging. She's my best friend. 85 00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:04,400 Ex-best friend, I thought. 86 00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:06,320 Been nearly a year, hasn't it? 87 00:04:06,320 --> 00:04:09,760 Freya, I'm laying out some dresses for your interview. 88 00:04:09,760 --> 00:04:11,920 Is it insane if we co-ordinate? 89 00:04:11,920 --> 00:04:14,080 WHISPERS: Oh, my God, she's going to make me commit a crime. 90 00:04:14,080 --> 00:04:17,840 I had a nightmare I was trapped in an escape room with her last week. 91 00:04:17,840 --> 00:04:18,880 Just her. 92 00:04:18,880 --> 00:04:19,960 TY SINGS 93 00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:21,320 What would her notice period be? 94 00:04:21,320 --> 00:04:24,480 You just want her fired because she saw your ball sack last night? 95 00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:27,160 No, I... I want to fire her because of... 96 00:04:27,160 --> 00:04:29,440 Her personality? Yeah! 97 00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:30,800 Well, no. 98 00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:32,400 Yeah. 99 00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:36,160 I'm sorry I come with such a highly irritating plus one. 100 00:04:36,160 --> 00:04:39,240 I'm just happy you're here. I don't care who you come with. 101 00:04:39,240 --> 00:04:43,120 And I know that my art stuff is quite, um... Big? 102 00:04:43,120 --> 00:04:44,440 Distinctive. 103 00:04:44,440 --> 00:04:47,680 Asshole. Go kick arse at your interview. 104 00:04:47,680 --> 00:04:49,160 I don't want to go. 105 00:04:49,160 --> 00:04:51,000 Don't do it, then. You don't need to do it. 106 00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:52,960 I don't want to be a kept woman. 107 00:04:57,920 --> 00:04:59,760 God, I love love. 108 00:05:10,840 --> 00:05:11,880 Can I just...? 109 00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:15,160 I wondered where these might look better on someone standing. 110 00:05:15,160 --> 00:05:17,320 So, what's this meeting? 111 00:05:17,320 --> 00:05:19,880 Uh, it's no big deal. 112 00:05:19,880 --> 00:05:23,600 Oh... Our Freya was scouted as a model. 113 00:05:23,600 --> 00:05:25,840 OK, that makes it sound impressive. 114 00:05:25,840 --> 00:05:28,840 I just, you know, hash-tagged wheelchair on Instagram, 115 00:05:28,840 --> 00:05:34,160 and this diversity agency slipped into my DMs. Mmm. 116 00:05:34,160 --> 00:05:38,000 Do you think it's going to be like America's Next Top Model? 117 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:40,360 God, this job! 118 00:05:42,240 --> 00:05:43,440 Wipes. 119 00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:45,240 TY SINGS 120 00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:47,720 Wow! She's, like, dolphin frequency annoying. Yeah. 121 00:05:47,720 --> 00:05:49,800 you should have seen the people that I didn't hire. 122 00:05:49,800 --> 00:05:51,200 I mean, at least she's... 123 00:05:52,520 --> 00:05:54,880 Extra wipes. ..efficient. 124 00:05:54,880 --> 00:05:56,840 So moodelling? Hmm. 125 00:05:56,840 --> 00:05:59,520 Doesn't that kind of, like, compromise your artistic integrity? 126 00:05:59,520 --> 00:06:01,040 Yeah, obviously, 127 00:06:01,040 --> 00:06:03,320 but I have to do it. 128 00:06:03,320 --> 00:06:06,360 I really need the money. Plus, disability's having a moment. 129 00:06:06,360 --> 00:06:08,600 Hey, you were disabled way before it was cool. 130 00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:11,360 I know, right? I've been doing this for years. 131 00:06:12,920 --> 00:06:15,040 Tell me where you've been? 132 00:06:15,040 --> 00:06:17,200 Look, it's been 11 months. 133 00:06:17,200 --> 00:06:20,240 It's so long my tits have grown a cup size. 134 00:06:20,240 --> 00:06:21,920 I've been busy! 135 00:06:21,920 --> 00:06:24,440 With what? Hey, did you make this catheter chandelier?! 136 00:06:24,440 --> 00:06:25,640 Yeah. 137 00:06:25,640 --> 00:06:27,240 SHE PLAYS A FANFARE 138 00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:29,440 I pissed out of those. Oh! 139 00:06:29,440 --> 00:06:30,640 Right. 140 00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:32,200 Honest to God, 141 00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:35,680 do you think it's presumptuous if I packed some headshots of my own? 142 00:06:35,680 --> 00:06:37,200 Knock yourself out. 143 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:39,000 I'm going to need two minutes. 144 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:40,920 DOORBELL RINGS 145 00:06:57,200 --> 00:06:59,640 It's fine. We've got, like, 20 minutes. Vroom-vroom. 146 00:06:59,640 --> 00:07:01,920 To make, like, a 55-minute journey? Beep-beep. 147 00:07:01,920 --> 00:07:04,440 Ty, can you not make the sounds, please? 148 00:07:04,440 --> 00:07:06,000 PHONE CHIMES 149 00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:08,600 Excuse me, sir, wheelchair waiting. 150 00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:10,680 PHONE CHIMES 151 00:07:14,840 --> 00:07:16,560 Crikey. Hey! Hey, what the fuck! 152 00:07:16,560 --> 00:07:18,960 Excuse me. What's up your arse? Pickle. What's that even mean? 153 00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:21,840 OK, so... 154 00:07:22,960 --> 00:07:24,720 So you're cleaning my house? No, no. 155 00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:27,400 You only do that when you're nervous. No. What is it? What? 156 00:07:27,400 --> 00:07:29,640 No, it's done. It's done. Stop. Done. 157 00:07:29,640 --> 00:07:32,320 So, what? What? It's nothing. 158 00:07:32,320 --> 00:07:35,440 It's nothing. Well, it's a couple of things. Um... 159 00:07:35,440 --> 00:07:39,880 One, um, I'm throwing Freya a little welcome-to-London party, 160 00:07:39,880 --> 00:07:40,960 and, erm... 161 00:07:42,280 --> 00:07:44,600 Yeah, I think I'd like you to come. 162 00:07:46,120 --> 00:07:47,920 Are you sure that's wise? 163 00:07:47,920 --> 00:07:49,400 Which bit? 164 00:07:50,560 --> 00:07:52,360 Oh, God. 165 00:07:52,360 --> 00:07:53,840 The innocence. 166 00:07:53,840 --> 00:07:55,120 OK. And two? 167 00:07:55,120 --> 00:07:57,880 Two is, um... 168 00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:01,680 ..I would like a divorce. 169 00:08:03,040 --> 00:08:04,360 Please. 170 00:08:06,120 --> 00:08:09,840 So I guess, for me, it's like disability is just a subject 171 00:08:09,840 --> 00:08:12,680 worth exploring, right, because it's kind of like... 172 00:08:12,680 --> 00:08:15,320 I mean, we all have needs, right, and requirements, 173 00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:18,320 so I guess through modelling, that's kind of what I'd want to do 174 00:08:18,320 --> 00:08:21,600 is like highlight that in more of a kind of like, 175 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:24,000 my body may be different to you, 176 00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:26,400 but, like, there's no difference, right? 177 00:08:26,400 --> 00:08:28,480 You know what I mean? Like, there's nuance. 178 00:08:32,720 --> 00:08:35,400 Sorry, I was completely out of it there. 179 00:08:35,400 --> 00:08:38,520 Yeah, I'll be honest. I was just staring at your jawline. 180 00:08:38,520 --> 00:08:40,520 So have you modelled much before? 181 00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:42,560 Oh, just some life drawing stuff in Canada. Oh! 182 00:08:42,560 --> 00:08:45,240 Comfortable with nudity? OK. Tick. 183 00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:48,280 If I may... Yes. I think what Olivia and I are most excited about... 184 00:08:48,280 --> 00:08:49,960 Sorry, wait a second, I thought... 185 00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:51,200 Aren't you Olivia? 186 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:53,000 BOTH: We're both Olivia. 187 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:54,920 ..is your raw talent. 188 00:08:54,920 --> 00:08:58,120 Yeah, I don't really know if I'm a model, so... Um... 189 00:08:58,120 --> 00:08:59,920 OK, can I just stop you there? 190 00:08:59,920 --> 00:09:02,600 You're the most fucking stunning woman I've ever seen in my life. Mm. 191 00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:07,000 Yeah. And in terms of sell-ability, right now, 192 00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:10,640 I mean as a proud white disabled woman... 193 00:09:10,640 --> 00:09:12,400 I'm not, er, white. 194 00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:13,800 Who is? 195 00:09:13,800 --> 00:09:16,440 Yeah, well, I mean, I guess I am a bit, 196 00:09:16,440 --> 00:09:18,840 but, like, also part Guyanese, part Chinese. 197 00:09:18,840 --> 00:09:21,120 Oh! An angel rolled in from heaven. 198 00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:26,440 So it's going well, then? Mm-hm. It's going really well. Yes. 199 00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:28,560 Yeah. It's complicated but... 200 00:09:28,560 --> 00:09:32,000 Well, I mean, I'd imagine it'd be complicated. Yeah. 201 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:34,520 She's not. I mean, she's not... She's not complicated, 202 00:09:34,520 --> 00:09:38,960 but it's the whole...the whole, you know, 24-hour PA thing and... 203 00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:41,560 What do you mean PA? Carer? Er, yes. 204 00:09:41,560 --> 00:09:44,280 You don't do a single thing for her? You LAZY fuck! 205 00:09:44,280 --> 00:09:48,960 Easy now. No, I would, but she needs 24-hour round-the-clock care 206 00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:51,200 from a professional. That's just how it is. 207 00:09:52,240 --> 00:09:53,360 Right. Hmm. 208 00:09:53,360 --> 00:09:54,800 That must be weird. 209 00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:56,600 It's an adjustment. 210 00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:00,040 So, how's the sex? 211 00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:02,480 The sex is the best sex I think I've ever... No! I was joking. 212 00:10:02,480 --> 00:10:04,320 And also, just fuck off! 213 00:10:04,320 --> 00:10:06,600 I mean, with a bit of shaping from us, 214 00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:10,480 I'm seeing Paris, Milan, Tokyo, 215 00:10:10,480 --> 00:10:12,320 Caracas. 216 00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:14,880 Yes. I'd just love to see a pay cheque! 217 00:10:14,880 --> 00:10:16,360 Oh. She's funny. 218 00:10:16,360 --> 00:10:18,280 Mmm. We can use that. 219 00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:19,680 Yeah. Yeah. 220 00:10:19,680 --> 00:10:21,360 Bottom line is, right, 221 00:10:21,360 --> 00:10:25,400 brands are dying to put someone like you in their ads. Hmm. 222 00:10:25,400 --> 00:10:28,680 And I am dying to be in them. 223 00:10:28,680 --> 00:10:30,160 Hey, Frey! 224 00:10:34,360 --> 00:10:36,200 Do you have any cigarettes? 225 00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:38,720 I'm so sorry, her English isn't great. 226 00:10:38,720 --> 00:10:41,080 Hola. Hola. 227 00:10:42,360 --> 00:10:44,720 TRANSLATION: 228 00:10:52,120 --> 00:10:53,360 Oh! Olivia! 229 00:10:53,360 --> 00:10:55,000 OLIVIAS GIGGLE 230 00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:57,960 I had a boyfriend from Granada. 231 00:10:57,960 --> 00:11:00,080 So, is this all I can do you for, then - 232 00:11:00,080 --> 00:11:02,800 a quick cuppa and a slice of divorce, or...? 233 00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:04,560 ANERICAN ACCENT: That's about it. 234 00:11:04,560 --> 00:11:07,240 I hate it when you do that voice. I know. 235 00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:09,280 How's your knee? Feeling bendy? 236 00:11:10,560 --> 00:11:12,480 You're not going to propose? 237 00:11:12,480 --> 00:11:13,560 Oh! 238 00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:14,880 Right... 239 00:11:14,880 --> 00:11:17,080 Oh. I'm on it. Shit, Abe. 240 00:11:17,080 --> 00:11:19,560 No, I've just got the parking. That's all. Abe. Abe... 241 00:11:27,960 --> 00:11:30,720 So, are you and Freya best friends? 242 00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:32,480 Er, yeah. 243 00:11:32,480 --> 00:11:34,240 We used to be. 244 00:11:35,360 --> 00:11:37,360 Oh. What happened? 245 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:47,960 Well, you know, um, Freya's whole...wheelchair...look? 246 00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:49,960 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 247 00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:51,360 Obviously. 248 00:11:51,360 --> 00:11:54,200 Um... And please keep this between us. Oh, yeah. 249 00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:55,880 Mm-mm... 250 00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:57,120 Thank you. 251 00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:59,120 When we were kids... Mm-hm? 252 00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:02,400 ..we were really, really close. We were, like, six or seven, 253 00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:06,800 and, um, there was this bridge that we used to play on, 254 00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:08,120 and it was... 255 00:12:08,120 --> 00:12:09,920 It was very, very high. 256 00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:12,800 And, I don't know, 257 00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:16,440 one day, something just, like, took over me... 258 00:12:18,080 --> 00:12:21,120 ..and I just...pushed. 259 00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:30,240 Wow... 260 00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:33,520 Oh, my God. 261 00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:36,800 If you want to tell someone you love them, you don't have to propose. 262 00:12:36,800 --> 00:12:39,480 You can just buy them flowers or a bath bomb. You all right, Dad? 263 00:12:39,480 --> 00:12:41,000 Hello, boy. 264 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:43,920 How's life with declining looks and intellect? 265 00:12:43,920 --> 00:12:47,920 Have you washed your hands since your last little wank-a-thon? 266 00:12:47,920 --> 00:12:50,720 Ooh, can I remind you this is a woman's space? 267 00:12:50,720 --> 00:12:52,200 How's your mistress? 268 00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:55,520 Freya's good, thank you. Yeah, settling in nicely. 269 00:12:55,520 --> 00:12:57,520 Hey! You can reduce your carbon cock print 270 00:12:57,520 --> 00:12:59,440 now you're not travelling back and forth to Canada 271 00:12:59,440 --> 00:13:01,320 to have intercourse with a woman my age! 272 00:13:01,320 --> 00:13:03,280 How about you and your failed East Asian odyssey? 273 00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:06,240 Indonesia? I mastered the art of the perfect nasi goreng, 274 00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:07,960 and then fucked a conservationist. 275 00:13:07,960 --> 00:13:10,320 I would like to call that a resounding success. 276 00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:13,080 Yeah, that white woman with dreadlocks. She was really lovely. 277 00:13:13,080 --> 00:13:14,920 We didn't really discuss her heritage. 278 00:13:14,920 --> 00:13:16,680 I thought you said she was Dutch. But all in all, 279 00:13:16,680 --> 00:13:19,680 it was a trip of a lifetime. Mm-hm. Until you got sectioned. 280 00:13:19,680 --> 00:13:21,560 Yeah, until I got sectioned. 281 00:13:21,560 --> 00:13:24,880 You're all right now, aren't you, darling? I'm doing fine, thanks. 282 00:13:24,880 --> 00:13:29,480 I'm not the one having a mid-life crisis, albeit a very inclusive one. 283 00:13:33,880 --> 00:13:35,520 WHISPERS: He's all right? 284 00:13:35,520 --> 00:13:36,640 I think so. 285 00:13:39,320 --> 00:13:41,920 Ground floor. You've reached the voicemail of Ty... 286 00:13:43,080 --> 00:13:44,840 Doors opening. 287 00:13:44,840 --> 00:13:46,920 Oh, hey, you're here. How did it go? 288 00:13:46,920 --> 00:13:49,160 Hey! Yeah. Where's Ty? She's not answering. 289 00:13:49,160 --> 00:13:52,040 Oh, I sent her out to get some cigarettes and paracetamol. 290 00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:54,360 You can't do that. Why not? She's a PA. 291 00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:57,960 Not your PA. Fuck, I need to pee. OK. 292 00:13:57,960 --> 00:14:00,600 Relax. Relax. I'll do your cath. What? 293 00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:02,600 What? I did it once at uni. 294 00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:05,000 Your hands were numb because you were on K! 295 00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:07,960 You peed! Um, excuse me, hi. 296 00:14:07,960 --> 00:14:10,920 Do you have a disabled bathroom? We do. Yes. 297 00:14:10,920 --> 00:14:14,080 Um, it is still technically being built, 298 00:14:14,080 --> 00:14:17,320 but we have one on the way, which I think is the headline. 299 00:14:17,320 --> 00:14:19,800 Fuck's sake. 300 00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:24,400 So, you sure you remember how to do...? Yeah. 301 00:14:24,400 --> 00:14:26,400 Catheterisation is my middle name. 302 00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:29,840 If you mess it up, I'm going to get a UTI. Yeah, I know. 303 00:14:29,840 --> 00:14:31,200 Um... 304 00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:33,560 So you're wiping there, right, yeah? 305 00:14:33,560 --> 00:14:35,520 Yeah. Wipe. 306 00:14:35,520 --> 00:14:37,320 There we are. Wiping. 307 00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:38,680 Yeah. 308 00:14:38,680 --> 00:14:40,680 OK. Do you see the urethra? 309 00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:42,520 Uh, yeah, of course I do. 310 00:14:42,520 --> 00:14:45,160 Ooh, there it is, sneaky little fucker! 311 00:14:45,160 --> 00:14:46,720 OK. 312 00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:50,600 Slowly! I know! Slowly. 313 00:14:50,600 --> 00:14:52,760 I'm a gentle lover. I doubt that. 314 00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:56,600 Ah! Ooh! It's in. See? 315 00:14:56,600 --> 00:14:59,040 I told you I could do it. I'm like the pied piper of piss. 316 00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:01,600 Ooh, shit. 317 00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:03,840 What? You've, uh... No. 318 00:15:03,840 --> 00:15:05,640 It's just a little... No, it's not. 319 00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:07,400 You're closing your right eye. 320 00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:09,240 Oh, it really stings. 321 00:15:09,240 --> 00:15:11,160 Don't lick your lips. Oh, and it's salty. 322 00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:12,960 SHE SPITS 323 00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:14,400 I've missed you. 324 00:15:14,400 --> 00:15:16,920 Agh, yeah, who wouldn't miss this? 325 00:15:18,080 --> 00:15:20,360 Jo, you're wiping piss on a model. 326 00:15:20,360 --> 00:15:22,400 Shut up! They signed you? 327 00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:25,560 Now you're finally just a pretty face! 328 00:15:25,560 --> 00:15:27,920 It's all I ever wanted to be. 329 00:15:27,920 --> 00:15:29,920 Uh... 330 00:15:31,640 --> 00:15:34,080 Can you close my legs? Yes. Yeah. 331 00:15:37,320 --> 00:15:39,080 For when the disabled loo's ready. 332 00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:41,600 Thank you. 333 00:15:43,880 --> 00:15:46,040 Jo! What you doing? 334 00:15:47,880 --> 00:15:51,920 Jo? I hate being late. 335 00:15:51,920 --> 00:15:54,440 I can't believe you haven't been up here. 336 00:15:54,440 --> 00:15:56,680 He could be living under a fake identity! 337 00:15:56,680 --> 00:15:59,720 I mean, I know you hate boundaries but this is ridiculous. 338 00:15:59,720 --> 00:16:02,480 Do you want me to call the police? What? No. 339 00:16:02,480 --> 00:16:04,240 She's my best friend. 340 00:16:04,240 --> 00:16:06,760 WHISPERS: But she did this to you. 341 00:16:06,760 --> 00:16:07,960 What? 342 00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:12,480 Freya, there's a room up here full of dolls that look just like you. 343 00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:14,280 And they have big boobies. 344 00:16:22,760 --> 00:16:24,200 Jo? 345 00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:25,640 Yeah? 346 00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:39,320 Right, listen, it's my responsibility 347 00:16:39,320 --> 00:16:41,920 to get you places on time. No, Ty, no. We have to go! 348 00:16:41,920 --> 00:16:45,320 What the fuck? Ty, stop! 349 00:16:45,320 --> 00:16:46,600 Fuck. 350 00:16:50,280 --> 00:16:51,320 We need to talk. 351 00:16:52,960 --> 00:16:54,880 Absolutely. 352 00:16:54,880 --> 00:16:57,040 It's just... It's not working out. 353 00:16:57,040 --> 00:16:59,200 You and Abe? 354 00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:02,320 No. Oh. 355 00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:04,360 It's about Jo. 356 00:17:04,360 --> 00:17:06,080 What about me? 357 00:17:06,080 --> 00:17:09,160 Uh, it's probably best it comes from Freya. 358 00:17:09,160 --> 00:17:13,640 No, Ty, it's just there have been a few instances when... 359 00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:19,440 ..and it's not an all-the-time thing, but I do wonder if... 360 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:23,000 Maybe we just... It would be better if we maybe took a... 361 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,640 Ty, you're fired. 362 00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:30,480 And there's two weeks' notice, 363 00:17:30,480 --> 00:17:34,000 so I obviously want you to come tonight... Oh. 364 00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:37,560 Right, yeah, that's totally, um... 365 00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:39,880 That's fair. I get it. 366 00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:45,520 I...I guess maybe since becoming such good friends, 367 00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:48,000 probably we shouldn't be colleagues anyway. 368 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:52,040 I agree. 369 00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:53,440 Great. 370 00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:55,880 I agree too. Yeah. 371 00:17:57,960 --> 00:17:59,720 Here she is. Oh... Hi. 372 00:17:59,720 --> 00:18:02,360 Didn't think you were going to show up. I fired Ty. 373 00:18:02,360 --> 00:18:04,040 What? I fired Ty. Yes! 374 00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:06,520 I mean, oh, no. How did she take it? 375 00:18:06,520 --> 00:18:08,360 Hi, Freya! Yeah. Well, I think. 376 00:18:08,360 --> 00:18:10,760 Hey. Who are all these assholes? 377 00:18:10,760 --> 00:18:12,840 Mainly Abe's friends and family. 378 00:18:12,840 --> 00:18:15,600 OK, that looks like... I'm going for a wazz. Hey! 379 00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:19,440 Have you found out how long Jo is planning on staying? 380 00:18:19,440 --> 00:18:22,600 This is so lovely. Look at all of this. 381 00:18:22,600 --> 00:18:24,960 I feel... Aw! ..so welcome. 382 00:18:24,960 --> 00:18:28,040 Oh, good. Shame you missed the national anthem. 383 00:18:28,040 --> 00:18:30,120 Oh, yeah? We sang it four times. 384 00:18:30,120 --> 00:18:32,120 OK. That's kind of disgusting. 385 00:18:32,120 --> 00:18:34,200 TOILET FLUSHES 386 00:18:38,920 --> 00:18:40,720 Thank you. 387 00:18:52,280 --> 00:18:55,200 Sorry, I prefer the ladies'. It's a better vibe. 388 00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:58,520 Clearly, mommy issues. No, actually it's because I've got a massive cock 389 00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:00,560 and in the urinals people stare. 390 00:19:01,760 --> 00:19:04,600 So, what was it - too much love or not enough? 391 00:19:04,600 --> 00:19:07,080 Neither. Hate women or idealise them? 392 00:19:07,080 --> 00:19:08,720 Hmm... Both. 393 00:19:09,760 --> 00:19:10,920 Why, what about you? 394 00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:13,280 Oh, that's easy. Daddy issues. 395 00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:16,160 I like it hard. 396 00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:21,880 OK, you got me. My mum left us when I was ten. Hmm. 397 00:19:21,880 --> 00:19:23,360 I knew it! 398 00:19:23,360 --> 00:19:25,840 Fuck you, Esther Perel! No, you didn't. 399 00:19:25,840 --> 00:19:28,840 Well, at least you got a big dick out of it, right? 400 00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:31,320 Massive. 401 00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:34,160 Who are you? 402 00:19:35,160 --> 00:19:37,080 Do you really care? 403 00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:38,960 Not particularly, no. 404 00:19:58,800 --> 00:20:00,000 Um... 405 00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:03,880 Thank you. 406 00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:13,880 You're welcome. 407 00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:16,280 MUSIC PLAYS 408 00:20:24,360 --> 00:20:25,880 Vodka martini. 409 00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:27,400 Slightly dirty. 410 00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:29,240 Excellent choice. 411 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:40,600 He's throwing some serious shapes. He's throwing ALL of the shapes. 412 00:20:40,600 --> 00:20:42,320 From 1998. 413 00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:45,680 Is he an old friend? 414 00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:47,760 Ex-husband, actually. 415 00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:50,440 Oh, shit! Oh shit is right. 416 00:20:50,440 --> 00:20:53,520 "Oh shit" could have been our wedding vows, actually. 417 00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:04,240 Cheers. 418 00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:09,600 Oh, fuck me, that is delicious. 419 00:21:09,600 --> 00:21:11,360 Why aren't you dancing? 420 00:21:11,360 --> 00:21:13,120 God, there are so many reasons. 421 00:21:13,120 --> 00:21:15,120 Oh, stop it, you'll school 'em. 422 00:21:15,120 --> 00:21:16,920 Doreen's drunk. 423 00:21:16,920 --> 00:21:20,080 Yeah. I saw that. Do you want me to...? Yeah. Would you? 424 00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:21,440 Yeah. 425 00:21:25,440 --> 00:21:27,920 Gin and tonic, please, Jo. 426 00:21:29,240 --> 00:21:30,960 Damn, we're all out. 427 00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:33,840 I didn't know you worked here. 428 00:21:33,840 --> 00:21:36,200 I didn't know you invited your ex-wife. 429 00:21:36,200 --> 00:21:39,120 OK, look, um, I know you guys are very close... 430 00:21:39,120 --> 00:21:41,600 Oh. Your ex-wife? No, I just met her. She's lovely, though. 431 00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:42,880 Very good. 432 00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:46,760 I know you don't have much of an opinion of me. 433 00:21:46,760 --> 00:21:50,040 I don't know you, Abe. When Freya met you travelling, 434 00:21:50,040 --> 00:21:52,160 I was basically pushed out of my London trip, so... 435 00:21:52,160 --> 00:21:53,800 OK. Listen, listen. 436 00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:56,840 I'm very happy to have you stay for a couple of days, 437 00:21:56,840 --> 00:21:58,800 but we are starting a life together, 438 00:21:58,800 --> 00:22:02,040 she's settling in, and whilst she does, the last thing she needs... 439 00:22:02,040 --> 00:22:04,760 Is a bat-shit marriage proposal in public? 440 00:22:06,760 --> 00:22:09,560 OK, I'm not going to see her get hurt again, Jo. 441 00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:11,320 Well, that makes two of us. 442 00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:14,960 A couple of days. 443 00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:21,040 Yeah, it's long distance. Oh, yes. 444 00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:23,800 All straight, bro? Special delivery. 445 00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:26,440 I've put four shots in this one. 446 00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:28,640 Um, I'm so glad you're here. 447 00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:31,040 Ty is like fucking blackout drunk, 448 00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:35,200 and I have no clue about what I'm going to do tonight. 449 00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:40,360 Cool. Listen, I really need to speak to you. 450 00:22:40,360 --> 00:22:42,120 SLURRED: You look gorgeous. 451 00:22:42,120 --> 00:22:44,800 You special thing. Oh-ho-ho. 452 00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:46,640 Now, tell me, hand on heart, 453 00:22:46,640 --> 00:22:49,640 can you get out of this thing? 454 00:22:49,640 --> 00:22:51,000 Um... 455 00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:53,760 So, do you still carry emergency coke? Yes! 456 00:22:53,760 --> 00:22:56,920 BANG ON DOOR BOTH: Occupied! 457 00:22:56,920 --> 00:22:58,560 I bet it's fucking Doreen. 458 00:22:58,560 --> 00:23:00,200 So, go on. 459 00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:03,240 Make your comments about how I'm moving too quickly, 460 00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:05,920 and how Abe's a boring old man. Yeah, I mean, I get it, 461 00:23:05,920 --> 00:23:09,840 he's ancient, so you've got to do it whilst he's still alive. Wah-wah! 462 00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:11,840 Uh... All right. 463 00:23:11,840 --> 00:23:14,480 Fuck. OK. I think maybe... 464 00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:18,560 ..you know, it's moving a little fast. Or like... 465 00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:21,800 ..he is, at least. What's that supposed to mean? 466 00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:24,280 Uh... Do you know what? Forget it, don't worry about it. 467 00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:27,040 Forget what? Go on. Tell me. 468 00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:28,840 Uh... 469 00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:30,680 SHE SNIFFS 470 00:23:30,680 --> 00:23:32,240 OK. OK. 471 00:23:32,240 --> 00:23:34,720 Um, so... 472 00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:41,840 I think that Abe is going to propose. 473 00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:45,720 What? 474 00:23:45,720 --> 00:23:47,280 Yeah. Like, maybe now. 475 00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:48,720 Uh... Uh, so... 476 00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:52,080 I'm sorry to... We'll get the music back on in just a...just a second. 477 00:23:52,080 --> 00:23:55,080 And, um, I will just say a few words if that's OK. 478 00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:58,080 But I will... I think I'm just going to wait until she... 479 00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:01,160 ..reappears. 480 00:24:02,200 --> 00:24:04,080 Yeah, this is OK. Yeah. 481 00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:07,040 The way I see it, you've got two options, right? 482 00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:08,800 Uh-huh. You can say yes. 483 00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:10,600 Like, that's a thing, right? 484 00:24:10,600 --> 00:24:13,640 Or...oh! We can leave right now. 485 00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:15,280 I'm serious, listen to me. 486 00:24:15,280 --> 00:24:17,240 We can leave right now, we can hit up Provence. 487 00:24:17,240 --> 00:24:20,200 I have access to an insane lake house. I mean, I'm... 488 00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:22,320 I'm fucking the guy I've always wanted 489 00:24:22,320 --> 00:24:23,920 in the house I've always wanted 490 00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:26,160 in the motherfucking city I have always wanted! 491 00:24:26,160 --> 00:24:28,920 Amen. This is... This is great. 492 00:24:28,920 --> 00:24:30,880 This is GREAT! Fucking great. 493 00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:33,400 You know, the louder you say it, the more I believe you. 494 00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:35,760 What the fuck? We just moved in together. 495 00:24:35,760 --> 00:24:40,800 It's so soon. I love him, but, like, in public? 496 00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:43,320 A little bit awkward but that's OK. 497 00:24:43,320 --> 00:24:45,840 Let's just talk amongst yourselves, I guess, till we're... 498 00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:47,880 Is she there? She's not even... 499 00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:50,760 Why are you here, anyway! 500 00:24:50,760 --> 00:24:52,440 I'm here for you, obviously! 501 00:24:52,440 --> 00:24:54,000 No, you're lying! 502 00:24:55,480 --> 00:24:57,480 I haven't seen you for a year, 503 00:24:57,480 --> 00:25:00,280 and you turn up to my place looking like fucking roadkill. 504 00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:02,200 Hey! Don't turn on me. 505 00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:05,080 I mean not now. You look great now. Yeah, OK. 506 00:25:05,080 --> 00:25:08,320 You want me to help you or not? Huh? 507 00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:11,000 Yeah. 508 00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:12,880 Do you want me to buy you some time? 509 00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:21,920 Freya! 510 00:25:21,920 --> 00:25:24,080 FIRE ALARM BLARES 511 00:25:36,200 --> 00:25:39,560 There you are. Hey, are you OK? Yeah. Where did you go? 512 00:25:39,560 --> 00:25:42,360 I was about to do my big speech. I just had to pee. 513 00:25:42,360 --> 00:25:44,400 Yes. Really? At that very moment? 514 00:25:44,400 --> 00:25:47,400 Yeah, that's generally how it works, Dad. 515 00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:49,080 Oh, uh, Levi, Jo. 516 00:25:49,080 --> 00:25:51,360 Jo, Levi. Levi is Abe's son. 517 00:25:51,360 --> 00:25:52,760 Hello. 518 00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:54,080 Hi. 519 00:25:59,040 --> 00:26:01,280 Your coat, madam. Oh. 520 00:26:01,280 --> 00:26:03,920 You just... You could have just been nice to me. 521 00:26:06,400 --> 00:26:08,120 Which way's north? 522 00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:11,160 OK, um... 523 00:26:12,400 --> 00:26:14,760 How long before we can get a replacement? 524 00:26:16,680 --> 00:26:18,360 Dude, no. 525 00:26:18,360 --> 00:26:20,400 No! 526 00:26:20,400 --> 00:26:22,440 Dude, no. 527 00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:24,440 You've got... You've got other things you need to be... 528 00:26:24,440 --> 00:26:26,360 ..moving on for, right? 529 00:26:26,360 --> 00:26:28,760 WHISPERS: I need you. 530 00:26:31,080 --> 00:26:32,880 Fine. I'll do it. 531 00:26:34,520 --> 00:26:36,640 I guess we have someone.