1
00:00:03,070 --> 00:00:05,037
<i>Ladies and
gentlemen I'd like to direct</i>

2
00:00:05,039 --> 00:00:07,072
<i>your attention to the screen
in front of you.</i>

3
00:00:07,074 --> 00:00:09,608
<i>We'll be showing a brief
safety demonstration.</i>

4
00:00:09,610 --> 00:00:12,678
<i>While boarding the flight
please keep the aisle clear</i>

5
00:00:12,680 --> 00:00:15,080
<i>- and find your designated seat.
- Argh!</i>

6
00:00:15,082 --> 00:00:17,316
<i>In the event of a water landing
Chloe Bridges lips</i>

7
00:00:17,318 --> 00:00:20,119
<i>can be used as
a flotation device.</i>

8
00:00:20,121 --> 00:00:22,621
<i>Please enjoy one
complementary drink.</i>

9
00:00:25,459 --> 00:00:27,126
<i>Please store
your carry on in one of</i>

10
00:00:27,128 --> 00:00:28,761
<i>the overhead compartments.</i>

11
00:00:28,763 --> 00:00:31,030
<i>If you need to flee the aircraft
beware of sharp objects</i>

12
00:00:31,032 --> 00:00:33,632
<i>as they can puncture
the evacuation slide.</i>

13
00:00:33,634 --> 00:00:35,534
<i>We ask that all seat
backs and titty tassels</i>

14
00:00:35,536 --> 00:00:37,503
<i>are in their full
upright positions.</i>

15
00:00:37,738 --> 00:00:40,372
<i>If you have to smoke,
please disable the lavatory smoke detectors</i>

16
00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:42,474
<i>so as not to wake
the other passengers.</i>

17
00:00:42,710 --> 00:00:46,378
<i>The flight attendants will now
demonstrate proper safety procedures.</i>

18
00:00:46,380 --> 00:00:48,580
<i>Pull the cord
to inflate the safety chest.</i>

19
00:00:48,582 --> 00:00:51,750
<i>As a reminder racial profiling
is strictly tolerated,</i>

20
00:00:51,752 --> 00:00:54,686
<i>please report
any suspicious ethnicity.</i>

21
00:00:54,688 --> 00:00:58,424
<i>If you do not have a selfie stick,
one will be provided for you.</i>

22
00:00:58,626 --> 00:01:00,793
<i>Please keep your seat belts
fastened at all times</i>

23
00:01:00,795 --> 00:01:04,096
<i>as we may experience
unexpected flatulence.</i>

24
00:01:04,098 --> 00:01:06,632
<i>As a reminder there is no
crying allowed on this flight,</i>

25
00:01:06,634 --> 00:01:11,403
<i>please silence your baby at this time or it
will be checked to your final destination.</i>

26
00:01:15,409 --> 00:01:19,678
<i>Thank you for choosing
Koalair, koality you can trust.</i>

27
00:01:19,680 --> 00:01:23,182
<i>At this time your portable
electronic devices must be set...</i>

28
00:01:23,184 --> 00:01:24,704
<i>...to airplane mode.</i>

29
00:01:41,635 --> 00:01:43,368
<i>You're on
the other side of the world,</i>

30
00:01:43,370 --> 00:01:45,237
<i>how can we possibly
make this work?</i>

31
00:01:45,239 --> 00:01:46,538
Let's just make things simple

32
00:01:46,540 --> 00:01:48,440
like when we first met
on Chatroulette.

33
00:01:48,442 --> 00:01:50,476
When we first connected,
fell in love,

34
00:01:50,478 --> 00:01:52,845
and the sparks flew
when I asked you those deep,

35
00:01:52,847 --> 00:01:55,747
personal questions like,
what were those? Oh yeah,

36
00:01:55,749 --> 00:01:58,117
- age, sex, location?
<i>- Yeah.</i>

37
00:01:58,119 --> 00:02:01,220
Hey Logan, I'm ready to take
this to the next level.

38
00:02:04,291 --> 00:02:05,457
Oh yes, here we go.

39
00:02:08,796 --> 00:02:09,828
Come on, old friend.

40
00:02:10,531 --> 00:02:11,797
Who are you talking to?

41
00:02:11,799 --> 00:02:13,665
Just a second freshening up.

42
00:02:16,370 --> 00:02:21,173
Okay, okay, babe, now
these are for your eyes only.

43
00:02:21,175 --> 00:02:23,842
Yeah, don't worry babe,
it's just me.

44
00:02:28,449 --> 00:02:30,215
Do you have any almond milk?

45
00:02:31,619 --> 00:02:33,719
Uh... you were jerking off.

46
00:02:33,721 --> 00:02:37,523
Come on man! You shouldn't just
burst into people's rooms like that.

47
00:02:37,525 --> 00:02:39,391
And you shouldn't be jerking
off in the middle of the day

48
00:02:39,393 --> 00:02:41,894
with your door unlocked
and all your friends downstairs.

49
00:02:42,296 --> 00:02:44,263
Now, do you have
almond milk or not?

50
00:02:44,532 --> 00:02:47,499
Come on man, it's next
to my socks, you know that.

51
00:02:47,501 --> 00:02:48,767
Yo we're drinking up.

52
00:02:52,406 --> 00:02:53,772
Sorry about that babe.

53
00:02:54,375 --> 00:02:55,741
Okay.

54
00:02:57,211 --> 00:02:59,645
- Who was that?
- Oh.

55
00:02:59,647 --> 00:03:02,314
That would be Juanpa,
my foreign exchange brother

56
00:03:02,316 --> 00:03:04,416
who's overstayed
his welcome by a decade!

57
00:03:04,785 --> 00:03:07,186
What about your real
brother, Jake?

58
00:03:07,188 --> 00:03:08,453
Oh.

59
00:03:08,455 --> 00:03:10,889
Disney got him. Okay.

60
00:03:11,292 --> 00:03:14,459
- Argh. The moment's ruined babe, don't you think?
- No, no babe, um...

61
00:03:14,461 --> 00:03:16,562
Okay, just, okay... How about
this? Take a deep breath.

62
00:03:16,564 --> 00:03:18,830
Asasasa!

63
00:03:18,832 --> 00:03:21,767
Okay close your eyes, close your
eyes, that's right okay. Now...

64
00:03:22,703 --> 00:03:26,471
Imagine our second date, remember all
the sexy shit I was typing to you?

65
00:03:26,473 --> 00:03:28,373
I sent you that sexy
picture with the pineapple

66
00:03:28,375 --> 00:03:31,210
over my penis and I blamed it
on auto correct.

67
00:03:31,212 --> 00:03:33,278
- <i>Yeah.</i>
- It wasn't auto correct.

68
00:03:33,581 --> 00:03:35,380
- I said it.
- Okay, okay.

69
00:03:35,382 --> 00:03:40,285
My turn, imagine
we're together... alone.

70
00:03:40,921 --> 00:03:42,955
I'm standing right next to you.

71
00:03:43,457 --> 00:03:45,857
you can feel my body on yours

72
00:03:45,859 --> 00:03:49,261
- and I whisper in your ear...
- Smile, you're on camera!

73
00:03:49,263 --> 00:03:51,383
Lele,
what the actual fuck?

74
00:03:51,699 --> 00:03:53,865
This is gonna be the best video ever!

75
00:03:53,867 --> 00:03:55,334
Delete that now!

76
00:03:55,336 --> 00:03:56,868
No, it's gonna get
a million likes.

77
00:03:56,870 --> 00:03:58,303
It's not all about likes
you know.

78
00:03:59,540 --> 00:04:00,700
What, are you fucking stupid?

79
00:04:15,456 --> 00:04:18,323
Delete, delete,
delete it, Lele, delete it!

80
00:04:18,325 --> 00:04:19,992
Logan, are you all right?

81
00:04:28,335 --> 00:04:31,436
Suck it, bitch!

82
00:04:40,648 --> 00:04:42,648
- Delete.
- I hate you!

83
00:04:42,650 --> 00:04:45,050
- I hate you.
- You're girlfriend's a computer!

84
00:04:45,052 --> 00:04:47,386
Jesus.

85
00:04:48,055 --> 00:04:49,388
Oh my god.

86
00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:52,624
Thanks buddy.

87
00:04:53,827 --> 00:04:55,961
Sorry about that, babe.

88
00:04:55,963 --> 00:04:58,964
Oh man can't get
any privacy around here.

89
00:05:00,501 --> 00:05:02,634
- Okay.
- Hey Logan, you seen the email?

90
00:05:02,636 --> 00:05:04,870
What! Ow! Ah!

91
00:05:04,872 --> 00:05:09,441
- I'll talk to you later, Logan.
- No, no, no, no, no.

92
00:05:10,511 --> 00:05:12,911
Fuck, man.
I was getting somewhere.

93
00:05:12,913 --> 00:05:15,781
Bro what are you... what are you in
here doing man, I worry about you.

94
00:05:16,083 --> 00:05:18,517
That's not your girlfriend,
she's not a real girlfriend,

95
00:05:18,519 --> 00:05:20,419
she's a computer girlfriend.

96
00:05:20,421 --> 00:05:22,754
Huge difference,
real girlfriend, ump-ump

97
00:05:22,756 --> 00:05:25,057
computer girlfriend, eh-eh-eh,
you know what I'm saying?

98
00:05:25,059 --> 00:05:26,992
- Yeah.
- And I hate to break it down

99
00:05:26,994 --> 00:05:28,727
but your girlfriend
probably got a dick.

100
00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:31,430
This convention is gonna
be the fucking tits!

101
00:05:31,432 --> 00:05:32,831
What convention?

102
00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:34,833
You didn't hear about

103
00:05:34,835 --> 00:05:37,402
Bro it's the biggest social
media convention ever.

104
00:05:38,339 --> 00:05:41,640
Yeah man,
Everyone's gonna be there.

105
00:05:42,042 --> 00:05:44,876
It's gonna be awesome.
How do you not know about this?

106
00:05:48,415 --> 00:05:50,749
Okay, uh, seriously,
what is

107
00:05:50,751 --> 00:05:53,018
Who the hell cares,
people get laid at conventions.

108
00:05:53,020 --> 00:05:54,119
- Yeah they do.
- Okay.

109
00:05:54,121 --> 00:05:55,387
- Really?
- Huh.

110
00:05:55,389 --> 00:05:58,890
- Is that like a thing?
- Is that what, was that English?

111
00:05:58,892 --> 00:06:01,059
Like a thing,
sorry, I was born in Mexico.

112
00:06:01,061 --> 00:06:03,862
Yeah, that's literally why they
invented conventions, so you can fuck.

113
00:06:03,864 --> 00:06:06,631
It's like the only place you can cheat
on your wife and get a free gift basket.

114
00:06:06,633 --> 00:06:09,034
The gift baskets,
uh, but the cheating.

115
00:06:10,371 --> 00:06:12,704
- So this means...
- You can have sex finally.

116
00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:13,638
Ooh.

117
00:06:16,577 --> 00:06:18,410
No more virginity!

118
00:06:20,681 --> 00:06:23,115
- Yeah Juanpa.
- I'm not gonna be a virgin, Logan!

119
00:06:23,117 --> 00:06:26,017
Let's do it!

120
00:06:26,019 --> 00:06:28,120
We're all gonna be on
the same fucking flight.

121
00:06:28,122 --> 00:06:30,021
- Are you ready, man?
- What, no, no, no. What...

122
00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:32,491
We...
Do we have to fly?

123
00:06:32,493 --> 00:06:34,893
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah Logan, yeah.

124
00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:36,728
Uh, then I can't go.

125
00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:39,598
No Logan,<i> por favor</i> not again.

126
00:06:39,600 --> 00:06:41,967
<i>Why can't you fly Logan?</i>

127
00:06:44,471 --> 00:06:47,539
You can
do it, Logan, you can do it!

128
00:06:47,541 --> 00:06:49,975
It's gonna go on YouTube.

129
00:06:50,544 --> 00:06:52,544
I don't know,
looks pretty high from up here.

130
00:06:52,546 --> 00:06:55,580
You're wearing a helmet,
use your wings, you big pussy.

131
00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:57,149
Alright, here it goes.

132
00:06:57,151 --> 00:06:59,985
My foreign exchange brother
Logan is going to fly.

133
00:07:00,587 --> 00:07:01,853
Oh shit!

134
00:07:04,591 --> 00:07:06,024
Logan!

135
00:07:06,025 --> 00:07:07,625
- How bad is it?
- You broke your femurs.

136
00:07:15,969 --> 00:07:16,885
That's how I got these.

137
00:07:17,805 --> 00:07:20,672
- Whoa.
- That's the dumbest story I've ever heard.

138
00:07:20,674 --> 00:07:23,809
You ain't the fucking Wright
Brothers motherfucker, alright?

139
00:07:23,811 --> 00:07:26,578
And pull your pants up,
the scars bring out the bitch in you.

140
00:07:28,549 --> 00:07:30,215
You a nasty bitch,

141
00:07:30,217 --> 00:07:32,184
you a nasty bitch.

142
00:07:32,186 --> 00:07:33,952
Come on stop,
stop, guys, stop.

143
00:07:34,188 --> 00:07:36,888
Guys, I'm not going and stop
jumping, we have termites!

144
00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:38,490
Shut the fuck up
and jump with us!

145
00:07:38,492 --> 00:07:40,125
The termites!

146
00:07:40,127 --> 00:07:42,527
Termites?
Fuck the shitty termites.

147
00:07:43,130 --> 00:07:44,930
Ain't anybody worried
about no goddamn termites.

148
00:07:51,905 --> 00:07:54,940
Seriously, everyone needs
to stop jumping now!

149
00:07:57,077 --> 00:08:00,479
Yo, stop being
a biggity bitch okay?

150
00:08:00,781 --> 00:08:02,581
- Sorry.
- Ain't no termites gonna chew through

151
00:08:02,583 --> 00:08:04,516
this floor on my watch,
I ain't gonna let it happen.

152
00:08:04,518 --> 00:08:06,117
And second off you ain't
gonna tell a black man

153
00:08:06,119 --> 00:08:08,687
that he can't jump,
I know my rights motherfucker

154
00:08:08,689 --> 00:08:11,923
and I'm gonna jump.
I'm gonna jump!

155
00:08:11,925 --> 00:08:13,225
I'm gonna jump.

156
00:08:17,798 --> 00:08:19,097
- What the fuck?
- You guys good?

157
00:08:19,099 --> 00:08:20,131
- What happened?
- My dick.

158
00:08:20,133 --> 00:08:21,132
How did you land like that?

159
00:08:21,134 --> 00:08:24,169
It's time to get over
your fear of flying, man.

160
00:08:24,171 --> 00:08:26,671
If you won't do it for her,
do it for my virginity.

161
00:08:26,974 --> 00:08:28,240
Please.<i> Por favor.</i>

162
00:08:28,242 --> 00:08:30,709
Not gonna happen buddy, sorry.

163
00:08:31,011 --> 00:08:33,144
Oh, it just would have been fun
to tear up Australia with you.

164
00:08:35,282 --> 00:08:37,048
- Australia?
- Yeah, but it's fine,

165
00:08:37,050 --> 00:08:38,984
I'll just call a hooker
she can do the job.

166
00:08:38,986 --> 00:08:41,586
- It's in Australia?
- Yeah, bro, Australia.

167
00:08:41,588 --> 00:08:43,555
Imagine all the stuff
we can do there, man,

168
00:08:43,790 --> 00:08:47,058
- kangaroos, wallaby's, shrimp on the barbie.
- Shrimp on the barbie.

169
00:08:47,060 --> 00:08:50,595
Marsupials, motherfucker,
dingo's eating babies,

170
00:08:50,597 --> 00:08:52,964
and you get to see the girl
who lives in your computer.

171
00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:56,535
Real titties, soft nipples, uh?

172
00:08:56,537 --> 00:08:58,281
Hey, you talking about
computer titties in there?

173
00:08:58,305 --> 00:08:59,204
Hey, let
me tell you something about

174
00:08:59,206 --> 00:09:00,572
these Australian hoes.

175
00:09:00,574 --> 00:09:02,140
They're crazy,
they're like boomerangs.

176
00:09:02,142 --> 00:09:03,975
You throw them away
they come right back

177
00:09:03,977 --> 00:09:05,310
and suck your dick, mate.

178
00:09:05,746 --> 00:09:07,679
"Hey, can I suck your
dick, mate?" I'm like,

179
00:09:07,681 --> 00:09:08,813
"Yeah, you can do it.

180
00:09:08,815 --> 00:09:10,248
Now put your back into it".

181
00:09:11,118 --> 00:09:12,617
- Alright.
- Uh-huh.

182
00:09:12,619 --> 00:09:13,885
I know I'm gonna regret this.

183
00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:15,620
But let's do it!

184
00:09:21,128 --> 00:09:23,595
Oh, sh... Okay.

185
00:09:23,597 --> 00:09:27,198
Ah! That's amazing, babe,
you're gonna love it here, I promise.

186
00:09:27,601 --> 00:09:29,668
I dunno I heard actually
it's pretty gnarly.

187
00:09:30,003 --> 00:09:33,271
<i>- What do you mean?</i>
- Like deadly spiders, and snakes and shit.

188
00:09:33,273 --> 00:09:35,674
Oh yeah, we've got
a lot of spiders.

189
00:09:35,876 --> 00:09:39,678
- But they're not like everywhere, right?
- Yeah, look it.

190
00:09:42,616 --> 00:09:44,115
Holy shi...

191
00:09:47,955 --> 00:09:50,221
This is my spider stick.

192
00:09:50,857 --> 00:09:53,158
You're so brave for coming
to Australia, Logan,

193
00:09:53,160 --> 00:09:57,028
- I can't believe you're coming.
- I am absolutely terrified but I'm coming.

194
00:09:57,030 --> 00:10:00,298
Crikey, I have to go, bye.

195
00:10:03,804 --> 00:10:05,070
Okay.

196
00:10:05,606 --> 00:10:06,938
Time to say goodbye, old friend.

197
00:10:10,210 --> 00:10:12,043
One more time
for old time's sake.

198
00:10:12,045 --> 00:10:15,080
No. You're making this
harder than it has to be.

199
00:10:15,082 --> 00:10:17,082
That's what I was hoping for.

200
00:10:17,851 --> 00:10:21,019
- Fine, but don't tell Ariel.
- I never would.

201
00:10:21,855 --> 00:10:24,155
- Thanks.
- That bitch is gonna die.

202
00:10:25,859 --> 00:10:29,361
- What?
- I mean... Uh... I was made to fly.

203
00:10:29,363 --> 00:10:31,930
Anyways, er,
rub me on your cock.

204
00:10:35,335 --> 00:10:37,068
- What?
- Did I stutter?

205
00:10:37,069 --> 00:10:39,509
- No.
- Then fucking rub me on your fucking cock!

206
00:10:40,273 --> 00:10:41,339
Wee!

207
00:10:41,341 --> 00:10:44,709
<i>Super
psychedelic stuff from Stones</i>

208
00:10:44,711 --> 00:10:47,178
<i>and the groovy A-M-V-N.
The moment...</i>

209
00:10:47,180 --> 00:10:48,725
You boys want some water?

210
00:10:48,749 --> 00:10:50,115
- No, thanks man.
- Nah, we good fam.

211
00:10:50,117 --> 00:10:51,249
Appreciate you.

212
00:10:51,251 --> 00:10:53,685
- Then maybe some cocaine?
- Sure.

213
00:10:53,687 --> 00:10:55,920
What?
Juanpa what the f... What the fuck?

214
00:10:55,922 --> 00:10:58,056
I mean he's offering.
Shut, shut the fuck up.

215
00:10:58,058 --> 00:10:59,357
- You're not doing cocaine on the way to the airport.
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

216
00:10:59,359 --> 00:11:01,660
Holy shit. Yo,
Vitaly's on our flight.

217
00:11:01,962 --> 00:11:03,828
Apparently he's gonna
Australia to stand trial.

218
00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:06,364
Wait.
Why is Vitaly going to stand trial?

219
00:11:06,366 --> 00:11:07,932
Look if you weren't
so knee deep in

220
00:11:07,934 --> 00:11:09,434
computer pussy you'd
know what's going on.

221
00:11:18,345 --> 00:11:21,046
I'll take it
from here, blind side.

222
00:11:24,151 --> 00:11:26,951
Welcome to hell.

223
00:11:27,821 --> 00:11:29,788
Augh! Two for flinching.

224
00:11:31,858 --> 00:11:32,924
- Bye mom.
- Bye.

225
00:11:32,926 --> 00:11:34,225
- Bye dad.
- Bye.

226
00:11:35,429 --> 00:11:36,429
Have a great time.

227
00:11:47,808 --> 00:11:49,688
- I'm gonna miss you, Mom.
- I'm gonna miss you.

228
00:11:53,814 --> 00:11:55,094
Now that's
a close family.

229
00:11:55,415 --> 00:11:56,881
Must be European.

230
00:11:56,883 --> 00:11:58,049
Must be nice.

231
00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,451
Must be down to fuck.

232
00:11:59,453 --> 00:12:01,720
Hey, ya'll wanna
adopt a black man?

233
00:12:02,322 --> 00:12:03,855
I'm gonna go shove
this weed in my ass.

234
00:12:04,324 --> 00:12:05,890
I got to check in
with immigration.

235
00:12:07,327 --> 00:12:08,993
- You good?
- Not really.

236
00:12:12,032 --> 00:12:14,165
Hide your knives,
hide your drugs,

237
00:12:14,167 --> 00:12:16,801
and hide your liquors
'cause we searching everybody around here.

238
00:12:25,412 --> 00:12:26,412
Step out.

239
00:12:28,381 --> 00:12:31,983
- Do you possess any explosives?
- Nope just this bomb ass pussy.

240
00:12:33,186 --> 00:12:34,875
- How you going, buddy? That's adorable that bag.
- Here you go.

241
00:12:34,876 --> 00:12:36,565
Thank you,
it's actually brand new.

242
00:12:36,566 --> 00:12:38,255
- I just got it from the store.
- Oh yeah?

243
00:12:38,258 --> 00:12:39,390
- Yeah.
- Cool story man.

244
00:12:39,392 --> 00:12:42,160
Be, be...

245
00:12:42,162 --> 00:12:44,195
Come on man, what the fuck?

246
00:12:44,197 --> 00:12:46,030
Next.

247
00:12:46,032 --> 00:12:47,298
- What was that?
- Here you go.

248
00:12:47,868 --> 00:12:48,800
Whoa.

249
00:12:52,339 --> 00:12:53,972
My uterus.

250
00:12:53,974 --> 00:12:56,141
- Hey where's Juanpa?
- Immigration.

251
00:12:57,811 --> 00:12:58,543
Deported.

252
00:13:00,247 --> 00:13:02,280
Hey, how are ya? Deported.

253
00:13:04,384 --> 00:13:07,552
Oh sweet Jesus,
definitely deported.

254
00:13:09,856 --> 00:13:12,223
Well, hello young man,
are you a citizen

255
00:13:12,225 --> 00:13:14,959
- of these United States of America?<i>
- Si.</i>

256
00:13:14,961 --> 00:13:19,097
- I smell bullshit, deported.
- No! Ow! Wait, look,

257
00:13:19,099 --> 00:13:21,533
I wanna have sex,
just send me to Australia.

258
00:13:23,069 --> 00:13:25,336
- That can be arranged.
- Ah, thank you, sir.

259
00:13:26,807 --> 00:13:29,007
Whoa. Benny?

260
00:13:29,009 --> 00:13:31,142
Oh my god, long time no see.

261
00:13:33,246 --> 00:13:35,847
Um. Is...
he's supposed to be sleeping?

262
00:13:35,849 --> 00:13:36,948
Chill, Logan.

263
00:13:42,055 --> 00:13:43,055
Bag check.

264
00:13:43,857 --> 00:13:45,023
What, why?

265
00:13:45,025 --> 00:13:46,491
- Sir.
- I just have a laptop.

266
00:13:46,493 --> 00:13:48,026
You've been randomly selected

267
00:13:48,028 --> 00:13:50,228
by our advanced safety algorithm

268
00:13:50,230 --> 00:13:53,064
for an extensive anal
cavity search.

269
00:13:54,467 --> 00:13:57,202
I got 911 reasons not
to trust this guy.

270
00:13:59,506 --> 00:14:02,373
Whoa. You know you have
to ex-ray that bird.

271
00:14:03,043 --> 00:14:05,310
Well, he's, er,
like a lapdog, he can't fly.

272
00:14:05,312 --> 00:14:07,612
I don't know
if that bird is a terrorist.

273
00:14:08,014 --> 00:14:10,915
Check the damn bird. Thank you.

274
00:14:16,623 --> 00:14:19,357
Sir, the bird, it's over
three fluid ounces,

275
00:14:19,359 --> 00:14:20,625
you're gonna have to check it.

276
00:14:20,627 --> 00:14:23,294
- Come on, he's got scoliosis.
- Hum.

277
00:14:23,296 --> 00:14:25,263
Ma'am no twerking in my machine.

278
00:14:25,265 --> 00:14:27,432
- I wasn't twerking.
- I'm just making sure.

279
00:14:47,988 --> 00:14:50,054
No, you can't make me!

280
00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:51,589
You can't make me!

281
00:14:51,591 --> 00:14:55,093
No, no, no, no!

282
00:14:55,095 --> 00:14:56,628
Ow, ow!

283
00:14:56,630 --> 00:14:58,463
Okay, okay.

284
00:14:58,465 --> 00:15:00,398
I'm scared.

285
00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:02,166
Wait guys, wait for me.

286
00:15:07,908 --> 00:15:10,308
Wait, stop, hey!

287
00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:12,610
Wait.

288
00:15:17,083 --> 00:15:19,050
As passengers in the emergency
row are you willing

289
00:15:19,052 --> 00:15:21,386
and capable to assist
in the event of an emergency?

290
00:15:24,090 --> 00:15:25,189
Alright, good enough.

291
00:15:25,625 --> 00:15:27,926
No, no I'm fucking not!

292
00:15:28,628 --> 00:15:31,029
Well, luckily for you
the passenger in 2E

293
00:15:31,031 --> 00:15:33,551
just passed away so I can upgrade
you to first class if you like.

294
00:15:33,633 --> 00:15:35,300
- Passed away?
- Mm hm.

295
00:15:35,502 --> 00:15:36,935
What do you mean passed away?

296
00:15:43,677 --> 00:15:47,111
One for you, there you are.

297
00:15:47,113 --> 00:15:49,314
Yeah, mm-hum, hi there you go.

298
00:15:49,316 --> 00:15:51,616
Alright,
there you are, sir.

299
00:15:53,086 --> 00:15:55,186
Hey, Juanpa you made it.

300
00:15:55,188 --> 00:15:56,721
They searched my cavities man.

301
00:15:57,357 --> 00:15:59,424
I've never been to a dentist
like this before.

302
00:15:59,426 --> 00:16:01,025
Alright,
move it along, here we go.

303
00:16:01,027 --> 00:16:02,393
Keep going, all the way back.

304
00:16:02,395 --> 00:16:05,063
Frosty, uh,
my last taste of America.

305
00:16:13,506 --> 00:16:14,506
Ah, shit.

306
00:16:20,213 --> 00:16:21,213
Ew.

307
00:16:24,351 --> 00:16:25,516
Auto correct.

308
00:16:25,518 --> 00:16:28,686
- Are you looking at naked pictures on your phone?
- No.

309
00:16:29,189 --> 00:16:30,555
Yeah, yeah you were.

310
00:16:30,557 --> 00:16:34,258
No, I... I mean, yeah I was
but it's my mom.

311
00:16:34,260 --> 00:16:36,160
You're staring at a naked
photo of your mom?

312
00:16:36,363 --> 00:16:39,197
- No! Yes. Look I... I mean...
- Oh my gosh.

313
00:16:39,199 --> 00:16:40,999
- Ugh.
- Technically yes, it was my mom, technically

314
00:16:41,001 --> 00:16:42,667
yes she was naked
but it's not like...

315
00:16:44,604 --> 00:16:46,237
I don't think we've met,
hi, I'm Logan.

316
00:16:48,141 --> 00:16:50,308
- Jenna.
- Hi Logan, I'm Jenna.

317
00:16:51,211 --> 00:16:53,478
- What?
- Okay, well, I'm...

318
00:16:55,615 --> 00:16:57,515
- I think we got off on the wrong foot.
- Cool.

319
00:16:58,618 --> 00:17:01,152
Really looking forward
to the next 17 hours of this.

320
00:17:01,154 --> 00:17:02,453
Yeah, me to.

321
00:17:04,157 --> 00:17:05,790
- Let me just move in.
- If that helps.

322
00:17:13,333 --> 00:17:18,369
Welcome aboard Koalair flight
1524 to Sidney, Australia.

323
00:17:18,571 --> 00:17:21,272
- Koality you can trust.
- Trust.

324
00:17:21,274 --> 00:17:25,176
This is your captain
Trussell with co-pilot Penis.

325
00:17:26,813 --> 00:17:29,247
<i>First of all
it's pronounced Penis,</i>

326
00:17:29,249 --> 00:17:31,416
<i>I come from a proud
Celtic heritage.</i>

327
00:17:31,418 --> 00:17:34,352
- I'd like to thank you for choosing Koalair.
<i>- Shut up.</i>

328
00:17:34,354 --> 00:17:36,487
We know you have many
choices in air travel

329
00:17:36,489 --> 00:17:39,090
and we are always surprised
when you choose us.

330
00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:41,526
- Argh.
- I think that went pretty well.

331
00:17:41,528 --> 00:17:43,628
That was killer
annunciation bro.

332
00:17:43,630 --> 00:17:46,531
You know I've been taking
this new speech therapy class

333
00:17:46,533 --> 00:17:49,067
and I think my lisp is gone.

334
00:17:49,069 --> 00:17:50,435
I can
barley notice it.

335
00:17:50,437 --> 00:17:51,602
You're so handsome,

336
00:17:51,604 --> 00:17:54,205
you look just like your daddy.

337
00:17:54,641 --> 00:17:56,774
Even though he ran off
with that cheating whore

338
00:17:56,776 --> 00:17:59,544
but your so cute, yes you are.

339
00:17:59,546 --> 00:18:01,479
We're gonna find
you a new daddy.

340
00:18:01,481 --> 00:18:04,182
Yes we are, with way more money.

341
00:18:04,184 --> 00:18:06,717
So, er, you gonna
the social media convention?

342
00:18:06,719 --> 00:18:10,855
- Oh, no, I'm visiting my sweetheart from the war.
- Oh.

343
00:18:10,857 --> 00:18:12,657
He's on his deathbed

344
00:18:12,659 --> 00:18:14,559
- and I promised him...
- Oh I'm sorry.

345
00:18:14,561 --> 00:18:18,396
one more ride on
the merry go around.

346
00:18:18,398 --> 00:18:19,630
Ah, cool.

347
00:18:20,333 --> 00:18:23,668
Oh, by the way I don't
mean to scare you

348
00:18:23,670 --> 00:18:27,205
but I sleep with my eyes open.

349
00:18:31,811 --> 00:18:34,312
- Hello? Uh...
- Oh.

350
00:18:34,781 --> 00:18:37,515
- Oh. Oh boy.
- Lick your lips.

351
00:18:37,517 --> 00:18:39,750
- Oh!
- Uh-oh.

352
00:18:39,752 --> 00:18:42,587
- Mwah.
- Whoa. Fucking A.

353
00:18:42,589 --> 00:18:44,655
And I was left with...

354
00:18:45,592 --> 00:18:46,891
these bad boys. Yeah.

355
00:18:46,893 --> 00:18:48,860
Oh my god.

356
00:18:48,862 --> 00:18:50,728
You probably think
I'm an idiot, huh?

357
00:18:50,730 --> 00:18:51,796
Check this out.

358
00:18:51,798 --> 00:18:55,733
Oh my god!
You have femur scars.

359
00:18:55,735 --> 00:18:57,802
- Matching femur scars.
- Oh yeah, we have matching femur scars.

360
00:18:57,804 --> 00:19:00,638
- This is weird, this is weird.
- It is weird,

361
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:02,573
most people don't even know what a femur is.

362
00:19:02,575 --> 00:19:04,142
How do we...? Ah.

363
00:19:04,144 --> 00:19:05,710
- Keep it down up there.
- It's fine.

364
00:19:05,712 --> 00:19:07,211
How did you get yours?

365
00:19:07,914 --> 00:19:10,181
Not to freak you out
but plane crash.

366
00:19:12,252 --> 00:19:14,218
Like a... Like the fucking...

367
00:19:14,821 --> 00:19:15,753
Uh...

368
00:19:15,755 --> 00:19:18,222
What the fuck?
God, what the fuck.

369
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:21,559
I'm kidding,
I'm kidding, I'm kidding,

370
00:19:21,561 --> 00:19:24,228
no one survives those, no.

371
00:19:24,230 --> 00:19:27,498
- I like to play out in your head though. That was funny.
- Okay.

372
00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:28,866
Aah.

373
00:19:28,868 --> 00:19:32,170
- No.
- You got me good, you got me good.

374
00:19:32,172 --> 00:19:33,905
You have a weird sense of humor.

375
00:19:33,907 --> 00:19:35,239
But I like it.

376
00:19:35,241 --> 00:19:38,242
- But how'd that happen actually?
- Ah. Drug deal went south,

377
00:19:38,244 --> 00:19:39,610
they brought hammers, so.

378
00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:43,781
Y... What kind of drugs?

379
00:19:43,783 --> 00:19:45,650
Whoa look at all this leg room.

380
00:19:45,652 --> 00:19:47,251
It's crazy.

381
00:19:47,253 --> 00:19:48,920
I can't even reach
my tray table.

382
00:19:51,758 --> 00:19:52,890
Jesus Christ.

383
00:19:56,196 --> 00:19:57,662
Hey, fucking stop having fun!

384
00:20:18,351 --> 00:20:21,485
<i>Look at you, my
little fluffy haired cum scarf.</i>

385
00:20:23,356 --> 00:20:26,357
<i>- Oh.</i>
- Am I following along at the right place?

386
00:20:26,526 --> 00:20:28,226
<i>That seat back
isn't gonna be the only thing</i>

387
00:20:28,228 --> 00:20:29,760
<i>in the upright position.</i>

388
00:20:30,863 --> 00:20:32,830
- I dunno.
<i>- I'm gonna break you in</i>

389
00:20:32,832 --> 00:20:35,967
<i>like a new pair of sneakers,
Vans, damn Daniel.</i>

390
00:20:35,969 --> 00:20:37,635
<i>I'm gonna ride you
like a pogo stick</i>

391
00:20:37,637 --> 00:20:40,004
<i>and fill you up like
you forgot to say when.</i>

392
00:20:40,006 --> 00:20:43,507
<i>I'm gonna fist you at the Four
Seasons pool in broad daylight.</i>

393
00:20:43,509 --> 00:20:46,544
<i>I'll stretch your tight
little ass like goatskin drum.</i>

394
00:20:47,347 --> 00:20:48,379
I can hear you.

395
00:21:01,494 --> 00:21:02,827
Mmm.

396
00:21:03,896 --> 00:21:04,896
Aww.

397
00:21:05,365 --> 00:21:08,799
Oh, whoa, stop, stop.

398
00:21:11,604 --> 00:21:15,273
Hey, you can do this.

399
00:21:18,611 --> 00:21:20,511
Don't be
a little bitch, alright?

400
00:21:20,513 --> 00:21:22,813
Please turn your cellular

401
00:21:22,815 --> 00:21:27,051
and electronic devices
to airplane setting.

402
00:21:27,053 --> 00:21:28,719
Hey fuck that.

403
00:21:28,721 --> 00:21:31,055
I'd rather die than turn my shit off.

404
00:21:31,057 --> 00:21:34,525
- I'm ready to die so you kill me motherfucker.
- We want full cell service!

405
00:21:34,527 --> 00:21:36,761
<i>♪ Say what you want fools
That's right fools ♪</i>

406
00:21:36,763 --> 00:21:38,529
<i>♪ I'd call you out
But it's not news ♪</i>

407
00:21:38,531 --> 00:21:40,665
<i>♪ The world knows it
Your girl knows it ♪</i>

408
00:21:40,667 --> 00:21:42,033
<i>♪ You not one of them
Tight dudes ♪</i>

409
00:21:42,035 --> 00:21:43,901
<i>♪ We watch you
We know the type ♪</i>

410
00:21:43,903 --> 00:21:45,836
<i>♪ Loud mouth like a motor bike ♪</i>

411
00:21:45,838 --> 00:21:47,538
<i>♪ I don't know why
We let you live ♪</i>

412
00:21:47,540 --> 00:21:49,407
<i>♪ Chalk it up to an over sight ♪</i>

413
00:21:49,409 --> 00:21:51,008
<i>♪ A real man makes up his mind ♪</i>

414
00:21:51,010 --> 00:21:52,877
<i>♪ Don't cry about it
He'll laugh about it ♪</i>

415
00:21:52,879 --> 00:21:54,779
<i>♪ Real men live forever ♪</i>

416
00:21:54,781 --> 00:21:56,580
Aw shit, we're going
the wrong way.

417
00:21:56,582 --> 00:21:58,015
Oh my goodness, I believe

418
00:21:58,017 --> 00:21:59,817
we are going
in the wrong direction.

419
00:21:59,819 --> 00:22:00,818
We got to flip a bitch.

420
00:22:00,820 --> 00:22:02,753
We will now flip a bitch.

421
00:22:02,755 --> 00:22:05,923
The aviation term
for turning the plane around.

422
00:22:06,359 --> 00:22:07,558
Coming about!

423
00:22:11,964 --> 00:22:13,964
It's a video, got your dumb ass.

424
00:22:17,603 --> 00:22:19,086
I fly all the time.

425
00:22:19,087 --> 00:22:20,570
I can't talk right now mom,
I'm on a fucking plane!

426
00:22:20,573 --> 00:22:22,773
- What the hell is going on?
- Aw.

427
00:22:22,775 --> 00:22:25,042
What... Did you spill
on the console again?

428
00:22:25,044 --> 00:22:26,677
No I didn't spill, dad.

429
00:22:29,549 --> 00:22:31,682
We are getting
major satellite interference

430
00:22:31,684 --> 00:22:34,118
- for some reason.
- No, that's no satellite interference.

431
00:22:34,120 --> 00:22:36,087
Wait, do you think that they...?

432
00:22:36,823 --> 00:22:38,022
It's the cell phones.

433
00:22:41,761 --> 00:22:43,060
They didn't turn off
their cell phones.

434
00:22:43,062 --> 00:22:44,995
Everyone knows
that you put your phone

435
00:22:44,997 --> 00:22:46,597
in<i> airplane mode.</i>

436
00:22:46,966 --> 00:22:48,966
Don't be so fucking naive Penis.

437
00:22:48,968 --> 00:22:50,601
My name is Penis.

438
00:22:50,603 --> 00:22:52,069
It is a Celtic name.

439
00:22:52,071 --> 00:22:54,538
God damn it,
what the hell is going on.

440
00:22:54,540 --> 00:22:57,575
Hey you motherfuckers, turn off
your fucking cellphones.

441
00:22:57,577 --> 00:22:58,909
Dad!

442
00:23:05,618 --> 00:23:07,451
<i>♪ We're gonna live forever ♪</i>

443
00:23:18,531 --> 00:23:19,864
Flying ain't so bad.

444
00:23:20,933 --> 00:23:22,099
Hey, look at my little doggie.

445
00:23:22,101 --> 00:23:23,401
- Aw.
- Isn't he cute?

446
00:23:23,403 --> 00:23:24,902
- Yeah, he is.
- Yeehaw.

447
00:23:24,904 --> 00:23:26,384
- Yeah, that's my baby.
- That's good.

448
00:23:26,672 --> 00:23:27,638
- Whoa, whoa.
- Oh.

449
00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:28,973
- Yeah. Yeah.
- No. Um...

450
00:23:28,975 --> 00:23:30,508
Who is that shirtless hunk?

451
00:23:30,510 --> 00:23:32,610
I'm getting as far away
from that cheating prick

452
00:23:32,612 --> 00:23:34,445
as possible, hence Australia.

453
00:23:35,148 --> 00:23:37,615
Oh damn, my bad.

454
00:23:39,986 --> 00:23:41,866
You know I know what it's
like to be cheated on.

455
00:23:42,855 --> 00:23:44,655
Yeah this one time during
midterms this Asian girl

456
00:23:44,657 --> 00:23:46,090
kept looking over
at all my answers.

457
00:23:46,859 --> 00:23:48,959
Which I ironic you know
because she's Asian,

458
00:23:52,131 --> 00:23:52,913
I should be cheating off of her.

459
00:23:52,914 --> 00:23:53,696
But it... I see how
that's different now

460
00:23:53,699 --> 00:23:56,434
that the words have come
out of my mouth.

461
00:23:56,702 --> 00:23:57,702
What's your Instagram?

462
00:23:58,771 --> 00:23:59,970
I don't have social media.

463
00:24:01,007 --> 00:24:02,706
What do you mean
when you say that?

464
00:24:02,975 --> 00:24:05,476
I mean like I'd rather just
be living my life instead of

465
00:24:05,478 --> 00:24:09,613
- worrying if people are gonna like and comment on it.
- Wow.

466
00:24:10,016 --> 00:24:12,983
- Are you with the
- No, no, kind of, no.

467
00:24:12,985 --> 00:24:15,753
- Wow.
- No, no. I'm actually going to Australia

468
00:24:15,755 --> 00:24:17,087
to visit my girlfriend
for the first time.

469
00:24:17,089 --> 00:24:18,622
Your girlfriend's
a computer!

470
00:24:18,624 --> 00:24:19,990
Fuck you, Lele.

471
00:24:19,992 --> 00:24:21,659
Check out how pretty she is.

472
00:24:21,661 --> 00:24:24,128
- Home screen.
- Whew! Home screen official.

473
00:24:24,130 --> 00:24:26,030
Yeah, she's, she's gorgeous.

474
00:24:32,839 --> 00:24:34,505
Hey, boys.

475
00:24:34,707 --> 00:24:36,640
Oh my god. Oh!

476
00:24:36,909 --> 00:24:41,011
I am so sorry. Oh jeez,
sorry, sorry about that okay.

477
00:24:44,116 --> 00:24:45,516
Oh. Huh.

478
00:24:45,518 --> 00:24:47,751
This would happen to me
on my first day.

479
00:24:47,753 --> 00:24:49,153
Humph.

480
00:24:56,896 --> 00:24:58,863
<i>Attention, all
passengers. We have reached</i>

481
00:24:58,865 --> 00:25:01,232
our cruising altitude
of 38,000 feet,

482
00:25:01,234 --> 00:25:03,601
it is now safe to
unfasten your seat belts.

483
00:25:03,603 --> 00:25:06,203
Unfasten? You mean turn up?

484
00:25:17,850 --> 00:25:19,850
<i>♪ Come here we go
Through the rhythm move ♪</i>

485
00:25:19,852 --> 00:25:22,152
<i>♪ You ain't got a lot ass
You got a little bit though ♪</i>

486
00:25:22,154 --> 00:25:24,855
<i>♪ Always ignore my phone
When I'm sick of a hoe ♪</i>

487
00:25:24,857 --> 00:25:27,525
<i>♪ I take a white bitch
Back home when I'm alone ♪</i>

488
00:25:32,698 --> 00:25:35,065
<i>♪ Sower's in the back seat
Louis riding shotgun ♪</i>

489
00:25:35,067 --> 00:25:37,701
<i>♪ Girl on the rebound
I'm Dennis Rodman ♪</i>

490
00:25:37,703 --> 00:25:39,970
<i>♪ These girls get mad
When they chasing me ♪</i>

491
00:25:39,972 --> 00:25:42,706
<i>♪ True Hollywood story
Let's take some heat ♪</i>

492
00:25:42,708 --> 00:25:45,209
<i>♪ Friends try to cock block
like Chris Hanson ♪</i>

493
00:25:45,211 --> 00:25:47,912
<i>♪ Straight to the bathroom
I'm done dancing ♪</i>

494
00:25:47,914 --> 00:25:50,147
<i>♪ Posers in the stall
'Cause I'm bring romance ♪</i>

495
00:25:50,149 --> 00:25:53,083
<i>♪ I murder girls 69
Like Charles Manson ♪</i>

496
00:25:58,090 --> 00:26:00,591
<i>♪ Bass getting louder
Sounds like a bullet ♪</i>

497
00:26:00,593 --> 00:26:02,927
<i>♪ Nose full of powder
Mouth full of bullshit ♪</i>

498
00:26:02,929 --> 00:26:06,830
<i>♪ Dick never prouder sly that
A girls fit tits falling out ♪</i>

499
00:26:06,832 --> 00:26:09,099
<i>♪ Don't stop it's working
Undress us with your eyes ♪</i>

500
00:26:09,101 --> 00:26:11,969
<i>♪ And you can't stop drooling
Keep it in your pants girl ♪</i>

501
00:26:11,971 --> 00:26:13,837
<i>♪ Who are you fooling
But you may give you</i>

502
00:26:13,839 --> 00:26:15,306
<i>♪ A flight you'll never forget ♪</i>

503
00:26:24,750 --> 00:26:26,684
<i>You can't hear
my thoughts.</i>

504
00:26:26,686 --> 00:26:29,219
- Yes I can, Bruce.
<i>- Stop it.</i>

505
00:26:37,763 --> 00:26:41,298
Oh score, oh my god,
alright, well.

506
00:26:43,669 --> 00:26:46,937
Oh, hey, bulimic, get out of
there. that stuff costs money.

507
00:26:47,340 --> 00:26:49,773
What... What am I...

508
00:26:49,775 --> 00:26:52,276
I speak goat to,
you are a basic bitch.

509
00:26:52,278 --> 00:26:54,712
What if I let you lick
one of my nipples?

510
00:26:54,714 --> 00:26:57,147
I wouldn't fuck your brother
even if we was hot.

511
00:26:57,350 --> 00:26:59,617
Okay, what about
if I told you I had a penis?

512
00:26:59,619 --> 00:27:02,152
Here's the deal, you are
a skinny, ratchet ass,

513
00:27:02,154 --> 00:27:04,755
basic bitch who goes
to Cancun for spring break

514
00:27:04,757 --> 00:27:07,024
- and will put anything in her mouth, got it?
- What?

515
00:27:07,026 --> 00:27:10,060
Take your brunette
extensions, your skinny,

516
00:27:10,062 --> 00:27:12,296
weird, Selena Gomez
look alike bullshit,

517
00:27:12,298 --> 00:27:15,766
- go get on your phone and go find a cock to suck.
- Well...

518
00:27:15,768 --> 00:27:18,402
Shhh. You're a basic bitch,
get out of my liquor.

519
00:27:36,188 --> 00:27:38,389
- Coffee, sir?
- Yes please.

520
00:27:38,891 --> 00:27:41,058
Okay and how would you like it?

521
00:27:41,060 --> 00:27:44,294
Like I like my women,
black and full of cream.

522
00:27:48,067 --> 00:27:49,266
You kiss like my dad.

523
00:27:49,268 --> 00:27:53,003
- Let's just pretend you didn't say that, okay?
- Okay.

524
00:27:55,675 --> 00:27:56,675
There you go.

525
00:27:58,077 --> 00:27:59,077
The fuck?

526
00:28:04,784 --> 00:28:05,784
You're next.

527
00:28:07,787 --> 00:28:09,153
Hey, guys just wanted
to let you know

528
00:28:09,155 --> 00:28:11,889
I didn't see anything,
you're still going.

529
00:28:11,891 --> 00:28:13,824
You're still going
at it. Okay, sorry.

530
00:28:13,826 --> 00:28:15,159
I still didn't see anything.

531
00:28:16,729 --> 00:28:21,432
Oh, ho-ho-ho. There you are.

532
00:28:21,434 --> 00:28:25,703
Oh, you're an escape artist
just like your daddy.

533
00:28:25,705 --> 00:28:26,870
Mm. Huh?

534
00:28:29,408 --> 00:28:30,574
Yeah.

535
00:28:30,575 --> 00:28:31,741
Oh, I'm sorry.
Where are my manners,

536
00:28:31,744 --> 00:28:33,377
you must be hungry comrade, huh?

537
00:28:33,946 --> 00:28:35,746
You want some banana, huh?

538
00:28:35,748 --> 00:28:37,381
You want a little banana?
Here you go.

539
00:28:37,917 --> 00:28:39,883
Why don't you eat that,
there you go.

540
00:28:39,885 --> 00:28:41,151
Why
don't you take that all?

541
00:28:41,153 --> 00:28:42,419
Yeah that's what I thought,

542
00:28:42,421 --> 00:28:43,821
that's what I thought.

543
00:28:43,823 --> 00:28:46,757
You want some cheese, pal,
you got cheese in Russia?

544
00:28:47,026 --> 00:28:48,826
Oh, you got a built in
cheese grater right there,

545
00:28:48,828 --> 00:28:50,094
look at you, huh, look at you.

546
00:28:50,096 --> 00:28:52,029
What does that
taste like, borsht?

547
00:28:52,031 --> 00:28:54,732
What else? Oh, Choco-taco.

548
00:28:54,734 --> 00:28:57,267
I hope you're not dairy
intolerant there, Ruski.

549
00:28:57,269 --> 00:29:01,438
How's that? Oh yeah, oh yeah.

550
00:29:03,342 --> 00:29:05,075
What the fuck you
looking at, Aladdin?

551
00:29:05,077 --> 00:29:06,410
Nothing, what's your problem?

552
00:29:06,412 --> 00:29:08,245
I got no problem,
I'm just racist.

553
00:29:08,514 --> 00:29:11,448
I do respect queers though.
They've been through a lot.

554
00:29:11,450 --> 00:29:13,050
Now you got that gay marriage.

555
00:29:13,252 --> 00:29:14,692
Used to be what they'd do
is illegal.

556
00:29:14,887 --> 00:29:16,007
Now they got shows about it.

557
00:29:16,789 --> 00:29:18,756
- I binge watch.
- Okay, dude.

558
00:29:20,493 --> 00:29:22,192
Is he still looking? Yeah.

559
00:29:26,232 --> 00:29:29,066
And that's how I lost 15
percent of my right testicle.

560
00:29:29,802 --> 00:29:32,402
Yup, a dwarf in a Godzilla
costume, can you imagine?

561
00:29:32,404 --> 00:29:35,372
I don't have to imagine,
you just told me every last detail.

562
00:29:35,775 --> 00:29:38,086
There's nothing more I could
possibly learn about your balls.

563
00:29:38,110 --> 00:29:41,879
Oh you'd be surprised, they could do a
whole 60 minute special on my balls.

564
00:29:41,881 --> 00:29:44,481
Does your Internet girlfriend know
about your deflated testicle?

565
00:29:45,117 --> 00:29:47,151
It's not deflated and no,

566
00:29:47,153 --> 00:29:48,919
we have not crossed
that bridge yet.

567
00:29:48,921 --> 00:29:50,821
Alright, I'm sorry I got to ask,

568
00:29:50,823 --> 00:29:53,524
how can you love someone
you never actually met?

569
00:29:54,226 --> 00:29:57,261
- She makes me snort.
- What?

570
00:29:57,263 --> 00:29:59,296
She's funny, she's got
a great sense of humor,

571
00:29:59,298 --> 00:30:02,299
- I know it's cheesy but...
- Bro, I could make you snort in two seconds.

572
00:30:02,301 --> 00:30:03,901
No you could not, okay.

573
00:30:03,903 --> 00:30:05,903
It's practically impossible
to make me laugh.

574
00:30:06,272 --> 00:30:09,239
It takes someone creative,
it takes someone original.

575
00:30:09,241 --> 00:30:11,241
- Got to make a good joke to make me laugh.
- Argh!

576
00:30:17,049 --> 00:30:20,951
- Aw. Does this mean that you love me?
- Ah...

577
00:30:28,260 --> 00:30:31,428
By the way, thanks
for pepping me up earlier.

578
00:30:32,498 --> 00:30:34,431
I know it may not have seemed
like much but it really helped.

579
00:30:34,433 --> 00:30:35,966
Yeah, yeah, no problem Logan.

580
00:30:36,402 --> 00:30:38,602
Alright, I am going to
try to get some sleep

581
00:30:38,604 --> 00:30:40,437
and hopefully
not dream of dwarfzilla.

582
00:30:40,439 --> 00:30:41,605
Or swollen balls.

583
00:30:41,607 --> 00:30:43,907
- Yeah.
- Am I right?

584
00:30:43,909 --> 00:30:45,509
Yeah, okay goodnight.

585
00:30:46,412 --> 00:30:51,014
I'm gonna nominate your
shoulder as my pillow, okay.

586
00:31:03,629 --> 00:31:05,963
Did you really just wipe
your snot on my shoulder?

587
00:31:07,266 --> 00:31:08,266
No.

588
00:31:08,934 --> 00:31:10,000
Is this shit?

589
00:31:12,204 --> 00:31:13,604
Oh, okay, thank God.

590
00:31:29,655 --> 00:31:34,191
Hey, I have noticed that
the seatbelt sign has been off

591
00:31:34,193 --> 00:31:37,227
for the last several hours
and I just think that... Oh!

592
00:31:37,529 --> 00:31:39,229
That is very unprofessional

593
00:31:39,231 --> 00:31:41,531
and unsafe and Jesus Christ

594
00:31:41,533 --> 00:31:43,967
are you gonna suck his dick
all the way to Australia?

595
00:31:44,436 --> 00:31:45,936
Fuck it! I'll finish him off.

596
00:31:50,009 --> 00:31:51,074
Oh my god!

597
00:32:04,290 --> 00:32:05,989
We need your assistance
in the cockpit, sir.

598
00:32:05,991 --> 00:32:07,257
Are you fucking kidding me?

599
00:32:07,259 --> 00:32:11,328
Sir, we<i> really</i> need your
assistance in the cockpit.

600
00:32:11,330 --> 00:32:12,963
You're crazy
if you think I'm gonna let

601
00:32:12,965 --> 00:32:15,098
this soviet psychopath
sit back here alone.

602
00:32:15,634 --> 00:32:18,268
Sir, with all due respect
this is more important.

603
00:32:19,204 --> 00:32:20,537
Do you know what this
guy's capable of?

604
00:32:20,539 --> 00:32:22,639
He is the reason you have
your privates scanned

605
00:32:22,641 --> 00:32:25,676
at the airport, and I hate
having my privates scanned.

606
00:32:26,178 --> 00:32:28,412
I had my dick lobbed off
by a pottery wheel.

607
00:32:29,114 --> 00:32:31,248
Now my dick looks like the stump
at the end of the giving tree.

608
00:32:31,250 --> 00:32:32,250
Oh.

609
00:32:34,520 --> 00:32:36,119
If you so much as flinch

610
00:32:36,121 --> 00:32:38,555
I will make you a member
of the dick stump club.

611
00:32:40,492 --> 00:32:41,558
There are three of us.

612
00:32:43,662 --> 00:32:44,728
We meet on Wednesdays.

613
00:32:45,698 --> 00:32:46,698
Damn it.

614
00:33:06,719 --> 00:33:09,519
- What the fuck is on his mouth?
- I just thought they were making oral love,

615
00:33:09,521 --> 00:33:12,122
- I had no idea that they were...
- Oh you had no idea.

616
00:33:12,324 --> 00:33:13,657
- You had no idea?
- No.

617
00:33:13,659 --> 00:33:16,159
TAS article 1219 clearly states

618
00:33:16,161 --> 00:33:19,730
- no pilot shall engage in dick suckery without a spotter.
- What?

619
00:33:19,732 --> 00:33:21,999
- Dick suckery?
- How would I know that?

620
00:33:22,001 --> 00:33:24,401
- Cause that's your job.
- It's not my job. - Is everything okay?

621
00:33:24,636 --> 00:33:25,435
Hey, go back to your seat. ok?

622
00:33:25,437 --> 00:33:26,703
Go back to your seat now

623
00:33:26,705 --> 00:33:28,071
or I'm gonna tase
you till you shit.

624
00:33:28,073 --> 00:33:29,106
What happened to the pilots?

625
00:33:29,108 --> 00:33:30,307
Hey look, just be quiet, okay,

626
00:33:30,309 --> 00:33:31,742
we don't want
the rest of the plane

627
00:33:31,744 --> 00:33:33,243
to know the pilots are dead,
we're fucked.

628
00:33:33,245 --> 00:33:35,312
Dead, the pilots are dead?

629
00:33:36,215 --> 00:33:38,682
- Holy fucking shit.
- I came in here. And I found them like that and I was like,

630
00:33:38,684 --> 00:33:40,684
"Oh my god what do I do",
and then I went and got him.

631
00:33:40,686 --> 00:33:42,252
- And now it's...
- Alright listen. Shut up, shut up

632
00:33:42,254 --> 00:33:43,787
both of you calm down,
okay? Listen to me.

633
00:33:43,789 --> 00:33:46,656
- Hey over here, over here, over here.
- Ok, ok.

634
00:33:46,658 --> 00:33:49,693
Listen to me, okay, I'm trained
for situations like this.

635
00:33:49,695 --> 00:33:51,361
You go get me a car battery,

636
00:33:51,363 --> 00:33:53,397
a tourniquet, and a bendy straw.

637
00:33:53,399 --> 00:33:55,465
I'll have these zombie
pilots flying in no time.

638
00:33:55,467 --> 00:33:59,102
Sir, we don't have
anymore bendy straws.

639
00:33:59,104 --> 00:34:01,038
- Oh fuck!
- Fuck.

640
00:34:01,040 --> 00:34:02,506
- Alright.
- We are so fucked.

641
00:34:02,508 --> 00:34:04,174
I'm just gonna have
to land this plane myself.

642
00:34:04,176 --> 00:34:07,210
- You can fly?
- There are two things in my life that I love.

643
00:34:07,513 --> 00:34:08,779
Flying jets and pottery.

644
00:34:08,781 --> 00:34:10,614
- I gave my dick for it.
- Oh.

645
00:34:10,616 --> 00:34:13,250
I'm gonna land this plane
and we're gonna be just fine.

646
00:34:13,252 --> 00:34:15,085
Argh!

647
00:34:17,556 --> 00:34:18,622
Holy shit.

648
00:34:27,332 --> 00:34:29,699
- Ahh.
- Hey boss had a bit of radio silence

649
00:34:29,701 --> 00:34:31,668
from flight 1524
from Los Angeles.

650
00:34:31,670 --> 00:34:35,172
Oi, well you know what they say,
"Silence is golden", huh,

651
00:34:35,174 --> 00:34:38,141
especially from Los Angeles.
Bunch of fucking hippies.

652
00:34:38,710 --> 00:34:42,112
Hipsters. What the fuck
is Coachella anyway?

653
00:34:44,083 --> 00:34:45,315
Where's my baby?

654
00:34:49,788 --> 00:34:53,356
Is that a baby? Is that a baby?

655
00:34:55,127 --> 00:34:56,293
Oh shit.

656
00:34:57,262 --> 00:34:58,228
Have you seen my baby?

657
00:34:58,230 --> 00:34:59,396
A baby.

658
00:35:03,135 --> 00:35:04,134
Hi baby.

659
00:35:04,136 --> 00:35:05,469
Have you seen my baby?

660
00:35:06,271 --> 00:35:07,304
Have you see my baby?

661
00:35:07,306 --> 00:35:09,106
What did I find?

662
00:35:09,641 --> 00:35:13,410
Aw, you look starving. Come on.

663
00:35:15,681 --> 00:35:19,616
Sir, sir... hi, as much as
I love that Versace blouse

664
00:35:19,618 --> 00:35:22,152
you are cannot breast feed
that baby right here.

665
00:35:22,888 --> 00:35:23,888
Really?

666
00:35:24,456 --> 00:35:26,223
Well I think I can breast feed

667
00:35:26,225 --> 00:35:30,127
this random baby
wherever the fuck I want.

668
00:35:30,129 --> 00:35:31,728
- No you can't. No you can't.
- Okay?

669
00:35:31,730 --> 00:35:34,231
God gave me nipples
and I'll be damned

670
00:35:34,233 --> 00:35:35,665
if I don't use them, okay?

671
00:35:35,667 --> 00:35:37,517
Okay, well,
little science lesson,

672
00:35:37,518 --> 00:35:39,368
men don't produce breast milk
incidentally so, ah.

673
00:35:39,371 --> 00:35:41,338
Aw, oh, no.

674
00:35:42,541 --> 00:35:44,274
It's a miracle.

675
00:35:44,476 --> 00:35:45,909
Oh God, you're a squirter.

676
00:35:45,911 --> 00:35:48,178
Yeah, yeah milk facial.

677
00:35:48,514 --> 00:35:50,213
Who wants a milk mask?

678
00:35:50,215 --> 00:35:51,681
I didn't, uh, sir
I didn't realize.

679
00:35:51,683 --> 00:35:53,650
Wait, open your mouth
one more time. Ah.

680
00:35:53,652 --> 00:35:55,452
Oh, oh, okay. Oh.

681
00:35:55,454 --> 00:35:57,554
What's that?
That's not diet Coke, bitch.

682
00:35:58,357 --> 00:36:00,690
A little in the mouth,
okay never mind thank you.

683
00:36:01,460 --> 00:36:02,460
Idiot.

684
00:36:04,796 --> 00:36:05,796
Hi, how are you?

685
00:36:06,565 --> 00:36:07,731
This is my baby.

686
00:36:09,568 --> 00:36:10,568
You want some milk?

687
00:36:11,904 --> 00:36:13,624
I got two of these motherfuckers
right here.

688
00:36:30,822 --> 00:36:32,355
Oh shit, I have a boner.

689
00:36:34,760 --> 00:36:38,929
Oh no, no, no, no.
Oh no, no, no.

690
00:36:39,765 --> 00:36:43,567
No, sir, please wake up
sir, please wake up sir.

691
00:36:43,569 --> 00:36:46,736
Please wake up sir, oh God, sir!

692
00:36:46,738 --> 00:36:48,438
Okay, okay.

693
00:36:48,974 --> 00:36:49,974
Alright look.

694
00:36:52,911 --> 00:36:55,645
One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight.

695
00:36:55,647 --> 00:36:58,481
Please wake up, please wake up,
please wake up, please wake up.

696
00:37:00,452 --> 00:37:03,687
Oh God, no, no, no, no.

697
00:37:04,990 --> 00:37:08,325
Okay, okay, sir, please wake up.

698
00:37:08,327 --> 00:37:10,660
Please wake up, sir,
one, two, three, four,

699
00:37:10,662 --> 00:37:13,330
five, six, seven, eight.

700
00:37:25,310 --> 00:37:30,680
Please sir, please.

701
00:37:33,652 --> 00:37:35,018
Fuck!

702
00:37:40,792 --> 00:37:43,760
Some day all of this
will be yours.

703
00:37:56,375 --> 00:37:57,707
- Juanpa.
- What do you want?

704
00:37:57,976 --> 00:37:59,542
It's getting to the best part,

705
00:37:59,544 --> 00:38:01,645
she's putting the tongue,
oh, look at it, oh yeah.

706
00:38:02,814 --> 00:38:04,514
Damn it, Log,
what do you want bro?

707
00:38:05,617 --> 00:38:06,549
Can get that crow
bar back?

708
00:38:06,551 --> 00:38:08,051
Juanpa, we need to talk.

709
00:38:08,954 --> 00:38:11,321
Now. Now!

710
00:38:12,824 --> 00:38:13,857
Oh shit.

711
00:38:17,296 --> 00:38:18,395
You taking a selfie?

712
00:38:18,397 --> 00:38:21,064
Yeah it's lit. Argh!

713
00:38:21,433 --> 00:38:22,832
Should we try CPR?

714
00:38:23,302 --> 00:38:24,734
No man, I already tried that.

715
00:38:25,337 --> 00:38:27,037
Wait, wait, wait, wait.

716
00:38:27,039 --> 00:38:28,838
So this means
you made out with a guy?

717
00:38:29,508 --> 00:38:31,808
- Juanpa, this is not the time.
- Was it nice? Um...

718
00:38:31,810 --> 00:38:32,942
- What?
- It must be nice.

719
00:38:32,944 --> 00:38:35,478
- Dude, focus please.
- Yeah.

720
00:38:41,420 --> 00:38:42,500
They're actually dead, bro.

721
00:38:43,388 --> 00:38:44,721
Aw, nah, nah, nah.

722
00:38:46,925 --> 00:38:48,692
What, what should we do?

723
00:38:48,694 --> 00:38:51,061
I don't know.
Maybe someone else has a plan.

724
00:38:51,596 --> 00:38:54,597
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah
that's a great idea, Log,

725
00:38:54,599 --> 00:38:56,099
who should we get,
oh Brittany Furlan?

726
00:38:56,101 --> 00:38:58,601
Who wants a body shot?

727
00:38:59,404 --> 00:39:01,571
Or the guy who makes me
doubt my sexuality, huh?

728
00:39:03,408 --> 00:39:05,008
Maybe King Bach,
he's your buddy right?

729
00:39:05,010 --> 00:39:07,043
Ah, ah, ah, ah!

730
00:39:07,045 --> 00:39:08,478
Think straight.

731
00:39:08,480 --> 00:39:09,646
You're right,
everyone will panic.

732
00:39:09,648 --> 00:39:11,614
I need you to figure
this out, okay?

733
00:39:11,616 --> 00:39:15,485
I need to put my seed into
a woman's vagina before I die.

734
00:39:15,487 --> 00:39:17,354
Okay, you go do that,
you go do that,

735
00:39:17,356 --> 00:39:19,122
because I'm probably
gonna crash this plane.

736
00:39:19,124 --> 00:39:21,825
- Alright, one of us has to succeed, okay?
- Yeah.

737
00:39:21,827 --> 00:39:23,993
- Yeah. Okay.
- One of us will.

738
00:39:23,995 --> 00:39:25,528
- One of us.
- Yeah.

739
00:39:25,530 --> 00:39:26,530
Probably you.

740
00:39:35,040 --> 00:39:36,740
<i>♪ Don't that feel
Real funky ya'll ♪</i>

741
00:39:44,383 --> 00:39:47,951
Brittany, I want
to take a body shot.

742
00:39:47,953 --> 00:39:49,052
Okay, come here, bitch.

743
00:39:52,624 --> 00:39:53,624
Jenna?

744
00:39:54,826 --> 00:39:58,428
Hey, Jenna?

745
00:39:58,430 --> 00:40:00,563
- Hey.
- Oh, hey stranger, where you been?

746
00:40:00,899 --> 00:40:03,833
Um... Can we talk for a second?

747
00:40:06,638 --> 00:40:09,773
Are you seriously asking
if you can say something to me?

748
00:40:09,775 --> 00:40:11,841
You're talking to me
while you're saying this.

749
00:40:12,744 --> 00:40:14,010
So, so can we or...

750
00:40:16,581 --> 00:40:18,882
Amber alert,
we've got a missing person

751
00:40:18,884 --> 00:40:21,918
aisle in seat 2E, suspect,
looks like he's been crying.

752
00:40:22,554 --> 00:40:23,720
I'm not crying.

753
00:40:28,860 --> 00:40:31,027
Vitaly killed them and both
of the pilots are already dead

754
00:40:31,029 --> 00:40:32,762
and I'm really scared right now,

755
00:40:32,764 --> 00:40:34,497
'cause no one is flying
this plane right now Jenna

756
00:40:34,499 --> 00:40:35,765
and I'm really scared and you're

757
00:40:35,767 --> 00:40:37,167
the only person
I can trust to help.

758
00:40:37,469 --> 00:40:39,169
Okay that's adorable
and a really good story

759
00:40:39,171 --> 00:40:41,171
but we land in a few hours.
I'm gonna try to sleep - No, no.

760
00:40:41,173 --> 00:40:42,806
- ...and you're gonna try to get your shit together.
- No, no, no.

761
00:40:42,808 --> 00:40:44,007
Please, please, please, Jenna

762
00:40:44,009 --> 00:40:45,842
please just follow me, okay?

763
00:40:47,646 --> 00:40:48,711
You need to see this.

764
00:40:49,614 --> 00:40:51,080
These pilots better be dead.

765
00:40:55,120 --> 00:40:59,923
- Oh shit. I jinxed it.
- Yeah, I know right, what are the odds?

766
00:40:59,925 --> 00:41:02,792
Hey, you wouldn't by chance know
how to drive a 767, would ya?

767
00:41:04,863 --> 00:41:06,729
We're all gonna die!

768
00:41:06,731 --> 00:41:07,997
Calm down, calm down, calm down.

769
00:41:07,999 --> 00:41:10,233
Calm down, calm down.

770
00:41:10,235 --> 00:41:12,902
Do you know how to drive a 767?

771
00:41:12,904 --> 00:41:14,938
You unlucky bastard!

772
00:41:14,940 --> 00:41:16,773
Okay.

773
00:41:16,775 --> 00:41:18,775
Okay, breath Jenna
breath, breath, breath.

774
00:41:18,777 --> 00:41:20,210
Okay, Namaste, Namaste.

775
00:41:20,212 --> 00:41:22,245
Namaste, yeah, yeah,
that's right, that's good.

776
00:41:22,247 --> 00:41:23,847
Okay, okay.

777
00:41:23,849 --> 00:41:25,181
There's a murderer on this plane

778
00:41:25,183 --> 00:41:26,816
and I'm gonna have
to die with this loser

779
00:41:26,818 --> 00:41:29,185
and all his loser friends
but that's fine.

780
00:41:29,187 --> 00:41:32,021
I know my god it's not fine,
I'm not even having a good hair day.

781
00:41:32,257 --> 00:41:34,891
What about my open casket,
this plane will probably fuck my face up.

782
00:41:34,893 --> 00:41:36,960
- Jenna, Jenna, Jenna, Jenna!
- I need my face, what!

783
00:41:36,962 --> 00:41:38,628
We need to figure this out.

784
00:41:38,630 --> 00:41:40,997
Now, for the last time,

785
00:41:40,999 --> 00:41:43,900
do you know how to drive a 767?

786
00:41:45,036 --> 00:41:49,939
- No, I don't know how to fly a 767.
- Come on.

787
00:41:49,941 --> 00:41:51,808
So I'm just gonna
go back to my seat

788
00:41:51,810 --> 00:41:54,143
and look at pictures
of my dog until we crash.

789
00:41:54,145 --> 00:41:56,846
Until
we crash, we crash, we crash...

790
00:41:56,848 --> 00:42:00,550
Hey buddy. I heard you took
quite the little crash.

791
00:42:00,819 --> 00:42:02,619
Okay, let see what
the problem is.

792
00:42:05,123 --> 00:42:07,624
You puked on my bones!

793
00:42:07,626 --> 00:42:11,528
I'm so sorry, I don't
know what came over me.

794
00:42:11,963 --> 00:42:12,996
Ew.

795
00:42:14,699 --> 00:42:15,699
Are you okay?

796
00:42:21,006 --> 00:42:21,938
What was that?

797
00:42:21,940 --> 00:42:24,841
The flight attendants,
they'll know what to do.

798
00:42:25,710 --> 00:42:26,710
Did you just fart?

799
00:42:27,679 --> 00:42:29,145
But where did they go?

800
00:42:29,881 --> 00:42:30,914
We got to find them.

801
00:42:38,023 --> 00:42:39,088
Surprise.

802
00:42:45,597 --> 00:42:47,564
What the hell is wrong with you?

803
00:42:47,566 --> 00:42:49,699
What's wrong,
you don't like pranks?

804
00:42:49,701 --> 00:42:52,001
We don't like what,
I couldn't understand you, what?

805
00:42:52,237 --> 00:42:53,937
Amber alert, somebody's missing

806
00:42:53,939 --> 00:42:55,805
a sense of humor
down in the luggage.

807
00:42:55,807 --> 00:42:57,340
Amber Alert was my drag name.

808
00:42:59,244 --> 00:43:00,176
Okay.

809
00:43:00,178 --> 00:43:02,712
The flight attendants
are nowhere to be found

810
00:43:02,714 --> 00:43:05,432
- but I'm sure everything's gonna be fine, right?
- How is it gonna be fine, Logan?

811
00:43:05,433 --> 00:43:08,151
I don't know but they probably
figured out how to save the day.

812
00:43:08,153 --> 00:43:09,919
We're in an emergency
right now, you can't,

813
00:43:09,921 --> 00:43:11,788
you can't just sit there.
We need to do something.

814
00:43:11,790 --> 00:43:13,756
Press this button and
the flight attendants will come.

815
00:43:13,758 --> 00:43:15,825
Don't press the button,
that's not for emergencies,

816
00:43:15,827 --> 00:43:17,267
- that's for fucking water.
- Please.

817
00:43:17,729 --> 00:43:20,029
Wow, okay, at least have
the balls to do something.

818
00:43:22,067 --> 00:43:26,202
Oh my god, I just
hit the jackpot.

819
00:43:27,606 --> 00:43:28,805
How is this all free?

820
00:43:28,807 --> 00:43:30,139
You're a mother.

821
00:43:30,141 --> 00:43:31,908
- Oh, fuck.
- Give me these.

822
00:43:31,910 --> 00:43:34,110
- Jesus.
- Damn, you have a baby.

823
00:43:34,913 --> 00:43:37,380
You're supposed to have
seven of those but, you know.

824
00:43:37,382 --> 00:43:39,282
Taking care of business.

825
00:43:39,985 --> 00:43:42,885
<i>You can do it,
Logan, you can do it.</i>

826
00:43:42,887 --> 00:43:45,154
<i>If you won't do
it for her, do it for my virginity.</i>

827
00:43:45,156 --> 00:43:48,691
<i>Use your wings
you big pussy, pussy...</i>

828
00:43:49,861 --> 00:43:50,927
What are you doing here?

829
00:43:50,929 --> 00:43:52,161
I'm gonna drive this plane.

830
00:44:00,038 --> 00:44:02,205
Whoa, whoa, whoa, do you
even know what you're doing?

831
00:44:02,207 --> 00:44:04,073
No, but I'm a fast learner.

832
00:44:09,347 --> 00:44:11,681
Great, well, I hope
that wasn't important.

833
00:44:12,317 --> 00:44:16,019
Hey, hey check it out I think
I've figured out the radio.

834
00:44:16,221 --> 00:44:18,321
<i>Air traffic
control to flight 1524?</i>

835
00:44:18,323 --> 00:44:20,323
Air traffic control
to flight 1524?

836
00:44:20,325 --> 00:44:22,358
Oh my god you're there, hello.

837
00:44:22,360 --> 00:44:23,960
Aye, Benji here.

838
00:44:23,962 --> 00:44:25,862
Been trying to talk
to you guys for ages.

839
00:44:25,864 --> 00:44:27,296
Yeah Benji, we're here man.

840
00:44:27,298 --> 00:44:28,931
I take it
you're not the pilots?

841
00:44:28,933 --> 00:44:31,000
Uh, no, no,
my name is Logan Paul.

842
00:44:31,202 --> 00:44:32,735
You're not a terrorist,
are you mate?

843
00:44:32,737 --> 00:44:36,305
No, I'm
a social media sensation.

844
00:44:37,842 --> 00:44:40,043
We're a bit full
of ourselves, aren't we, mate?

845
00:44:40,345 --> 00:44:42,679
Why don't you stroke
the tip a bit more?

846
00:44:43,348 --> 00:44:45,248
- What?
- What happened to the pilots, mate?

847
00:44:45,817 --> 00:44:47,450
- They're dead.
- No worries, mate.

848
00:44:47,452 --> 00:44:50,253
- What happened to the flight attendants?
- They're missing.

849
00:44:50,255 --> 00:44:54,290
-<i> Slight worry but don't worry, we'll take care of ya.</i>
- Really?

850
00:44:54,292 --> 00:44:57,727
Amber Alert, missing flight
attendants of flight 1524.

851
00:44:59,297 --> 00:45:00,997
What was that? Aussie joke mate,

852
00:45:00,999 --> 00:45:03,066
you wouldn't get
the reference. Okay.

853
00:45:03,068 --> 00:45:05,435
It appears you guys
are a bit off course

854
00:45:05,437 --> 00:45:07,770
so I'm gonna punch in
some new coordinates,

855
00:45:08,073 --> 00:45:10,139
all you have to do
is engage the auto pilot

856
00:45:10,141 --> 00:45:12,709
and the plane will
literally land itself.

857
00:45:12,711 --> 00:45:15,144
Oh. That's great news, yeah.

858
00:45:15,146 --> 00:45:16,713
<i>You'll be a bloody hero, mate.</i>

859
00:45:16,715 --> 00:45:19,849
Yeah, yeah!

860
00:45:19,851 --> 00:45:21,484
Now you've got to raise
the auto pilot lever

861
00:45:21,486 --> 00:45:22,719
and engage the system.

862
00:45:22,721 --> 00:45:24,153
Okay, what does it look like?

863
00:45:24,155 --> 00:45:26,255
Big orange stick mate,
can't miss it.

864
00:45:29,894 --> 00:45:33,062
Um, can you be a little
more specific?

865
00:45:33,064 --> 00:45:36,799
It literally says autopilot
right on the thing there, mate.

866
00:45:37,736 --> 00:45:38,736
Um.

867
00:45:39,971 --> 00:45:41,237
Is that all it says?

868
00:45:42,807 --> 00:45:45,208
Big orange lever,

869
00:45:45,210 --> 00:45:48,244
center console, are you
bloody color blind?

870
00:45:48,246 --> 00:45:51,748
<i>It's the only thing
between you and certain death.</i>

871
00:45:53,918 --> 00:45:54,917
I broke it.

872
00:45:54,919 --> 00:45:59,422
- I'm sorry what?
- I broke off the autopilot by accident.

873
00:46:05,363 --> 00:46:06,363
Sir?

874
00:46:07,766 --> 00:46:08,431
Sir, you there?

875
00:46:11,169 --> 00:46:15,938
Crikey. It would appear there
are now a few more worries

876
00:46:15,940 --> 00:46:18,541
than my original estimate
of no worries.

877
00:46:19,978 --> 00:46:22,211
- How bad is it?
- You're fucked, mate.

878
00:46:22,881 --> 00:46:24,847
Oh my god.

879
00:46:25,416 --> 00:46:26,816
Oh my god.

880
00:46:26,818 --> 00:46:28,017
What do you mean I'm fucked?

881
00:46:28,019 --> 00:46:29,085
That's a great question.

882
00:46:29,320 --> 00:46:33,055
Well, you're
all types of fucked!

883
00:46:33,057 --> 00:46:36,159
You're totally fucked,
you're completely fucked.

884
00:46:36,161 --> 00:46:38,127
You're like a parrot
getting raped.

885
00:46:38,129 --> 00:46:40,863
- <i>You're fucked, I'm fucked.</i>
- Yeah.

886
00:46:40,865 --> 00:46:42,832
You're a little boy
in a windowless van,

887
00:46:42,834 --> 00:46:44,333
you're fucked
and you're gonna die.

888
00:46:44,836 --> 00:46:47,003
<i>Speaking of which I don't
like talking to dead people,</i>

889
00:46:47,005 --> 00:46:49,806
it really bums me out
so I'm gonna cut out early

890
00:46:49,808 --> 00:46:52,875
for lunch if no one minds
and, uh, grab a quick bite.

891
00:46:52,877 --> 00:46:54,076
Right, feeling a bit peckish.

892
00:46:54,078 --> 00:46:56,312
I mind, I definitely do mind.

893
00:46:56,314 --> 00:46:59,048
Well, too bad you're going
to be dead soon, Benji out.

894
00:47:00,151 --> 00:47:01,818
Alright, who wants tacos?

895
00:47:04,255 --> 00:47:06,823
- What a dick.
- How could you break the autopilot?

896
00:47:06,825 --> 00:47:08,157
It's not like
I did it on purpose.

897
00:47:08,159 --> 00:47:10,526
Oh, oh you didn't
do it on purpose?

898
00:47:10,528 --> 00:47:12,428
Well, that's great,
everything's just fine then,

899
00:47:12,430 --> 00:47:14,897
right, 'cause Logan
didn't do it on purpose.

900
00:47:14,899 --> 00:47:16,532
Give me this stupid thing.

901
00:47:17,268 --> 00:47:21,571
No, no, no. Um, pay, pay no mind
to the sound of struggle.

902
00:47:22,574 --> 00:47:24,540
<i>We are fine and smooth as silk.</i>

903
00:47:24,542 --> 00:47:26,823
- <i>Logan, they need to know.
- Jenna, no they don't.</i>

904
00:47:27,045 --> 00:47:29,245
I know you're probably terrified
right now and I am too,

905
00:47:29,948 --> 00:47:32,048
but what you're doing
is not helping.

906
00:47:33,051 --> 00:47:37,353
So just give me
the intercom, just hey.

907
00:47:37,989 --> 00:47:41,157
<i>Aw fuck, hey guys
if you look to your right</i>

908
00:47:41,159 --> 00:47:43,159
<i>and also to your left
you will notice</i>

909
00:47:43,161 --> 00:47:45,261
<i>the vast expanse of
the Pacific Ocean.</i>

910
00:47:45,263 --> 00:47:49,198
Oh, the ocean
that's so romantic.

911
00:47:49,200 --> 00:47:51,500
Okay, take
your fucking shot, Juanpa.

912
00:47:52,904 --> 00:47:55,338
Woohoo!

913
00:47:55,340 --> 00:47:57,073
We have to do something.

914
00:47:57,075 --> 00:48:00,109
Yeah, yeah I mean
it can be that hard, right?

915
00:48:01,646 --> 00:48:03,012
We'll first we can move
these bodies I mean

916
00:48:03,014 --> 00:48:04,294
they're really starting
to smell.

917
00:48:05,216 --> 00:48:06,949
Yeah. Up we go.

918
00:48:06,951 --> 00:48:08,551
Oh, I'm impressed.

919
00:48:08,553 --> 00:48:10,019
Yeah, moving corpses is easy.

920
00:48:11,656 --> 00:48:13,389
Oh no, just dry heaves.

921
00:48:13,391 --> 00:48:14,924
- Okay.
- I won't throw up.

922
00:48:17,962 --> 00:48:19,328
I'm sorry.

923
00:48:19,330 --> 00:48:20,330
Nice.

924
00:48:26,237 --> 00:48:27,237
Ew.

925
00:48:27,906 --> 00:48:29,472
Get the fuck out of my way.

926
00:48:30,141 --> 00:48:31,307
Have you seen my baby?

927
00:48:32,010 --> 00:48:33,010
No?

928
00:48:33,144 --> 00:48:34,477
Oh your breath stinks.

929
00:48:34,479 --> 00:48:35,912
Have you seen my baby?

930
00:48:37,181 --> 00:48:38,214
No.

931
00:48:38,216 --> 00:48:40,950
Oh sir, have you seen my baby?

932
00:48:41,953 --> 00:48:42,985
Your baby's missing?

933
00:48:42,987 --> 00:48:43,987
Yeah.

934
00:48:45,056 --> 00:48:48,157
I know your plight,
I'm a new mother myself.

935
00:48:49,093 --> 00:48:50,960
I'll help you find him,
what does he look like?

936
00:48:50,962 --> 00:48:54,096
Uh, he's a baby and he's white

937
00:48:54,365 --> 00:48:56,399
and he's got little arms.

938
00:48:57,201 --> 00:48:58,334
Is this your baby?

939
00:49:00,705 --> 00:49:01,705
Hey.

940
00:49:02,573 --> 00:49:03,573
Uh...

941
00:49:04,242 --> 00:49:05,374
I don't think so.

942
00:49:06,444 --> 00:49:08,144
I don't think so.

943
00:49:08,446 --> 00:49:11,480
Look lady, I'm not Dog
the fucking baby hunter.

944
00:49:11,482 --> 00:49:13,215
Okay, this baby that
I found simply doesn't have

945
00:49:13,217 --> 00:49:14,717
the wherewithal to raise itself

946
00:49:14,719 --> 00:49:16,152
and that's where I come in.

947
00:49:16,387 --> 00:49:17,987
That really looks...

948
00:49:17,989 --> 00:49:19,155
Why you touch baby?

949
00:49:19,424 --> 00:49:20,957
Who do you think you are?

950
00:49:20,959 --> 00:49:24,193
Walking around drunk around
this plane losing babies.

951
00:49:24,195 --> 00:49:26,395
You smell like
Jack Daniels's dick.

952
00:49:26,397 --> 00:49:28,130
I'm so sorry.

953
00:49:28,132 --> 00:49:31,167
You get the fuck out of our face
and you leave us alone.

954
00:49:32,236 --> 00:49:34,403
Why do men hate me so much?

955
00:49:34,405 --> 00:49:36,472
Because it's so easy.

956
00:49:37,709 --> 00:49:40,343
Boo fucking hoo.

957
00:49:43,147 --> 00:49:46,248
Do you know what would
be a hilarious prank?

958
00:49:49,187 --> 00:49:52,388
If we poisoned every
passenger on this plane.

959
00:49:52,390 --> 00:49:56,726
- No, no.
- Tell me where the emergency oxygen supply is.

960
00:49:56,728 --> 00:49:57,660
Never.

961
00:49:57,662 --> 00:49:58,594
- Never?
- Never.

962
00:49:58,596 --> 00:49:59,662
- Never?
- Never.

963
00:50:02,166 --> 00:50:03,432
- Never?
- No.

964
00:50:03,434 --> 00:50:05,735
Tell me how I access the oxygen,

965
00:50:05,737 --> 00:50:08,270
or I'll feed this dog cat food.

966
00:50:11,042 --> 00:50:12,575
Never! God no!

967
00:50:14,278 --> 00:50:15,278
Whoa!

968
00:50:16,114 --> 00:50:18,547
The poor dog, no.

969
00:50:19,550 --> 00:50:20,416
Good doggy.

970
00:50:22,020 --> 00:50:24,587
That's not what he's
supposed to eat.

971
00:50:24,589 --> 00:50:26,722
It's in the safety
glass by the door.

972
00:50:26,724 --> 00:50:28,624
- Why did you tell him, bitch?
- It's by the door.

973
00:50:28,626 --> 00:50:31,560
- You're going to pay for that.
- Thank you, thank you.

974
00:50:32,163 --> 00:50:34,063
You're going
to pay for that.

975
00:50:38,236 --> 00:50:40,036
Oh God, no.

976
00:50:42,740 --> 00:50:44,206
One for me.

977
00:50:47,412 --> 00:50:48,811
One for you.

978
00:50:48,813 --> 00:50:50,513
What are you doing?

979
00:50:52,550 --> 00:50:55,451
By the way it was dog food
the whole time.

980
00:50:56,621 --> 00:50:59,822
What kind of a man feeds
a dog cat food?

981
00:51:01,659 --> 00:51:04,393
How sick do you think I am?

982
00:51:08,266 --> 00:51:09,732
It's just a prank.

983
00:51:11,069 --> 00:51:12,802
You're probably not gonna
believe me when I tell you this

984
00:51:12,804 --> 00:51:17,440
but you know most people
think I'm this huge slut.

985
00:51:19,377 --> 00:51:21,677
But I've actually never
even been with a man before.

986
00:51:21,679 --> 00:51:24,480
Really? Maybe I can
help you with that,

987
00:51:24,482 --> 00:51:26,582
I've got some experience
in that arena.

988
00:51:29,520 --> 00:51:30,719
Aren't you like 16?

989
00:51:30,721 --> 00:51:32,154
Seventeen.

990
00:51:32,356 --> 00:51:35,858
Oh sorry, 17, my god.
You're still illegal.

991
00:51:35,860 --> 00:51:37,460
Hey, so what,
we're all gonna die.

992
00:51:37,795 --> 00:51:40,663
- What?
- Okay, look my dick can't handle anymore.

993
00:51:40,665 --> 00:51:42,765
The pilots are dead
and Logan's flying the plane.

994
00:51:44,535 --> 00:51:48,137
- What?
- You're so cute, and funny, and Mexican.

995
00:51:53,211 --> 00:51:55,178
That's not funny,
I, I took a picture.

996
00:51:55,179 --> 00:51:57,357
- Who is flying the plane?
- Logan's flying the fucking plane, alright.

997
00:51:57,381 --> 00:51:59,615
Listen, we've got nothing
else left to lose.

998
00:52:00,251 --> 00:52:02,218
This is either the most
elaborate pick-up line

999
00:52:02,220 --> 00:52:04,320
I've ever heard or we are
really all gonna die.

1000
00:52:04,322 --> 00:52:05,821
Either way you're fucked.

1001
00:52:06,791 --> 00:52:07,656
Good point.

1002
00:52:16,334 --> 00:52:17,600
Oh my god.

1003
00:52:25,276 --> 00:52:27,743
Fuck is going on
back there? Shit.

1004
00:52:28,346 --> 00:52:31,347
Son of a bitch.
Hey, how the fuck you sleeping through this?

1005
00:52:31,349 --> 00:52:33,749
Wake your ass up. I'm sure
we about too down in this bitch.

1006
00:52:33,751 --> 00:52:35,818
Wait, wait, I'm not on the pill.

1007
00:52:36,721 --> 00:52:37,786
Neither am I, neither am I.

1008
00:52:37,788 --> 00:52:39,455
<i>♪ Oh shit ♪</i>

1009
00:52:39,457 --> 00:52:41,557
Oh, oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

1010
00:52:41,559 --> 00:52:42,758
Yeah oh.

1011
00:52:58,543 --> 00:53:00,376
Oh, shit!

1012
00:53:16,694 --> 00:53:18,761
There's a solution
to any problem.

1013
00:53:18,763 --> 00:53:21,430
A wise woman once said,
"Shake it off..."

1014
00:53:25,536 --> 00:53:26,536
Simba!

1015
00:53:31,676 --> 00:53:33,776
Give this video a thumbs up!

1016
00:53:44,255 --> 00:53:46,922
Give me that selfie stick,
give me that selfie stick.

1017
00:53:47,491 --> 00:53:48,791
This is what panicking
looks like.

1018
00:54:00,338 --> 00:54:03,672
Yo, flight 1524 we are out here.

1019
00:54:03,674 --> 00:54:06,709
Your boy came back
like a movie star.

1020
00:54:06,711 --> 00:54:08,544
Follow me on Twitter at...

1021
00:54:09,380 --> 00:54:11,247
Fuck you Vitaly!

1022
00:54:14,352 --> 00:54:15,718
Brittany?

1023
00:54:15,720 --> 00:54:17,620
Brittany, Brittany, wake up.

1024
00:54:17,955 --> 00:54:19,388
Wake up, wake up.

1025
00:54:20,925 --> 00:54:23,459
You're being selfish
I need this.

1026
00:54:23,461 --> 00:54:24,660
I can tell you're breathing.

1027
00:54:27,665 --> 00:54:28,764
Are you there?

1028
00:54:28,766 --> 00:54:30,599
Leave Brittany alone.

1029
00:54:38,676 --> 00:54:39,942
Hey guys, Nick Bateman here.

1030
00:54:40,378 --> 00:54:41,610
Now, all my life

1031
00:54:42,313 --> 00:54:44,480
people would tell me
I'm really good looking.

1032
00:54:44,482 --> 00:54:47,683
That I turn straight guys gay,
lesbians straight.

1033
00:54:47,685 --> 00:54:49,818
Gay guys, gayer.

1034
00:54:49,820 --> 00:54:51,854
But you know what, there's more

1035
00:54:51,856 --> 00:54:54,890
to me than just a pretty face.
I'm also a junior pilot.

1036
00:54:56,794 --> 00:54:58,560
I don't know what's
going on back there

1037
00:54:58,929 --> 00:55:02,331
but I'm either gonna
save the day or die trying.

1038
00:55:02,333 --> 00:55:04,800
Fuck yeah man, fucking do it.

1039
00:55:05,336 --> 00:55:07,336
- Hooray!
- Hooray!

1040
00:55:07,338 --> 00:55:10,606
Yeah, let's do this,
let's do this!

1041
00:55:21,052 --> 00:55:22,851
Hey you, Yakuza.

1042
00:55:23,587 --> 00:55:25,454
Did you see anything, hum?

1043
00:55:26,557 --> 00:55:27,557
Jackie Chan?

1044
00:55:27,792 --> 00:55:29,925
Jackie, you, you see anything?

1045
00:55:30,494 --> 00:55:31,860
No? Shh.

1046
00:55:44,675 --> 00:55:47,876
<i>Hello everybody,
it's the homosexual flight helper.</i>

1047
00:55:47,878 --> 00:55:50,679
<i>The cabin pressure
is still so low,</i>

1048
00:55:50,681 --> 00:55:54,350
<i>please put you oxygen
masks back on. Thank you.</i>

1049
00:56:07,498 --> 00:56:08,797
<i>Don't do it, Logan.</i>

1050
00:56:08,799 --> 00:56:10,833
<i>Vitaly kazed the oxygen supply.</i>

1051
00:56:11,435 --> 00:56:12,968
<i>Godspeed my little cream pie.</i>

1052
00:56:13,504 --> 00:56:14,937
Jenna wait, don't put that on.

1053
00:56:15,506 --> 00:56:16,438
Why?

1054
00:56:16,440 --> 00:56:17,673
Something's wrong
with the oxygen.

1055
00:56:18,909 --> 00:56:19,909
How do you know?

1056
00:56:20,711 --> 00:56:21,711
I hear gay people.

1057
00:56:24,982 --> 00:56:26,048
I have to go find him.

1058
00:56:26,550 --> 00:56:29,451
Logan no. Please, don't.

1059
00:56:32,056 --> 00:56:33,056
Damn it.

1060
00:56:33,924 --> 00:56:35,090
Hey you.

1061
00:56:41,599 --> 00:56:43,832
Argh.

1062
00:56:46,670 --> 00:56:47,803
Ah, my dick.

1063
00:57:07,992 --> 00:57:10,092
My asshole, my asshole!

1064
00:57:10,928 --> 00:57:12,528
Argh!

1065
00:57:12,530 --> 00:57:15,097
I think it turned inside out!
Oh my god.

1066
00:57:21,038 --> 00:57:22,038
Nick!

1067
00:57:26,844 --> 00:57:28,043
Ah, great.

1068
00:57:35,686 --> 00:57:36,785
Not the vodka.

1069
00:57:36,787 --> 00:57:38,587
Ow!

1070
00:57:40,157 --> 00:57:42,124
Ow shit!

1071
00:57:42,126 --> 00:57:44,593
Holy shit,
what the hell are you doing?

1072
00:57:44,595 --> 00:57:45,994
Completing my master prank.

1073
00:57:46,564 --> 00:57:50,098
There's no social media
convention with all of you dead,

1074
00:57:50,100 --> 00:57:53,235
all of your followers
will be mine. Imagine the power.

1075
00:57:59,910 --> 00:58:01,610
Wait, you've been pranked.

1076
00:58:02,546 --> 00:58:04,947
- What are you talking about?
- It was just all a prank, bro.

1077
00:58:05,683 --> 00:58:08,750
Look closely, all these
people are acting, see?

1078
00:58:09,553 --> 00:58:10,619
Look at this guy.

1079
00:58:12,156 --> 00:58:14,790
Hello, I'm okay.

1080
00:58:15,192 --> 00:58:16,658
You have been pranked.

1081
00:58:16,861 --> 00:58:19,628
- Nick?
- See? Even that girls in on it.

1082
00:58:26,637 --> 00:58:27,903
Fuck you Vitaly!

1083
00:58:34,645 --> 00:58:36,144
Oh shit, I have a boner.

1084
00:58:36,146 --> 00:58:38,680
Argh! Wha... Wake up
you chiseled brute.

1085
00:58:38,883 --> 00:58:40,582
Oh, we are so fucking mcfucked.

1086
00:58:40,584 --> 00:58:42,284
This crazy Russian,
he's gonna crash the plane

1087
00:58:42,286 --> 00:58:44,720
and he threw out all
the parachutes except one.

1088
00:58:44,722 --> 00:58:45,722
Holy shit.

1089
00:58:46,857 --> 00:58:48,156
Is that dog eating cat food?

1090
00:58:50,861 --> 00:58:55,797
Logan, baby, it's dog
food in a cat food can.

1091
00:58:56,100 --> 00:58:57,766
Oh thank God.

1092
00:58:59,703 --> 00:59:01,737
With a hint of Nick Bateman.

1093
00:59:01,739 --> 00:59:04,773
It's just a prank, bro,
but I can assure you

1094
00:59:04,775 --> 00:59:07,242
your death will be very real.

1095
00:59:07,745 --> 00:59:10,546
Thanks for covering
my tracks, Logan Paul.

1096
00:59:11,615 --> 00:59:12,648
I owe you one.

1097
00:59:12,650 --> 00:59:17,853
No, no, no, no, no,
not the button, no, no that...

1098
00:59:28,132 --> 00:59:31,667
If I die I'm taking you
with me, you fuck.

1099
00:59:34,939 --> 00:59:38,240
Oh God I'm only 23, sort of.

1100
00:59:40,711 --> 00:59:41,843
I can't hold on anymore!

1101
00:59:50,054 --> 00:59:53,121
Tell my boyfriend Steve
to hide all the pornography.

1102
00:59:54,825 --> 00:59:57,926
Maverick, no, no, no!

1103
00:59:58,762 --> 00:59:59,962
Maverick!

1104
01:00:05,035 --> 01:00:06,735
That's my bird!

1105
01:00:11,709 --> 01:00:15,744
Oh God, thank you,
thank you, we're all together.

1106
01:00:17,181 --> 01:00:19,181
Hey, hey, hey, it's okay, hey.

1107
01:00:19,183 --> 01:00:21,149
<i>Save
the day cum sponge.</i>

1108
01:00:24,288 --> 01:00:25,921
Hey Bruce.

1109
01:00:26,790 --> 01:00:28,470
Any final advice on
how to land this plane?

1110
01:00:29,059 --> 01:00:31,927
If you can get to the cockpit,
engage the autopilot.

1111
01:00:31,929 --> 01:00:34,863
The plane will literally
land itself.

1112
01:00:37,001 --> 01:00:38,834
Okay. Erm...

1113
01:00:45,876 --> 01:00:47,342
Vitaly, where is Jenna?

1114
01:01:05,729 --> 01:01:07,195
Nice try, ha.

1115
01:01:08,432 --> 01:01:10,766
- Ah!
- Oh, shit, I am so sorry,

1116
01:01:10,768 --> 01:01:12,234
I thought I could
jump kick Vitaly

1117
01:01:12,236 --> 01:01:13,301
and save the day, it would
have been really cool.

1118
01:01:13,303 --> 01:01:15,137
Yeah, shut up and stop him!

1119
01:01:17,708 --> 01:01:18,708
Here.

1120
01:01:22,046 --> 01:01:24,246
- I hope you die!
- Argh!

1121
01:01:24,248 --> 01:01:26,181
This is just a flesh wound,

1122
01:01:26,784 --> 01:01:29,351
have a safe flight, captain.

1123
01:01:29,353 --> 01:01:31,453
- Oomph!
- Aww!

1124
01:01:31,955 --> 01:01:34,122
Oh shit.

1125
01:01:48,072 --> 01:01:50,189
You'll be missed.

1126
01:01:50,190 --> 01:01:52,307
Do you get it? The jet engine
turned him into mist.

1127
01:01:53,811 --> 01:01:54,811
Okay.

1128
01:01:59,116 --> 01:02:00,315
You got a plane to land.

1129
01:02:01,452 --> 01:02:02,451
I got this.

1130
01:02:05,856 --> 01:02:08,123
- I don't got this.
- Oh no, you do got this.

1131
01:02:08,125 --> 01:02:11,293
- I don't know if I got this.
- I mean if you don't got this, then who got this?

1132
01:02:11,495 --> 01:02:12,961
I guess I'm gonna
need to get this.

1133
01:02:12,963 --> 01:02:15,030
Oh this best going
to get got then.

1134
01:02:15,032 --> 01:02:17,866
It will, it's best gone got and
there ain't nobody better to go

1135
01:02:17,868 --> 01:02:20,302
- and get this than get me.
- You got to get it while the goings good.

1136
01:02:20,304 --> 01:02:23,004
Oh the goings good and I'm at
get it while the getting's good.

1137
01:02:23,006 --> 01:02:25,474
- You got to get it.
- I'm gonna get it.

1138
01:02:25,476 --> 01:02:28,009
What the fuck are you
people talking about?

1139
01:02:29,813 --> 01:02:31,379
- Get out there, come on.
- I'm a get it.

1140
01:02:31,381 --> 01:02:32,781
You're gonna get it.

1141
01:02:44,261 --> 01:02:45,193
Okay.

1142
01:02:45,195 --> 01:02:49,164
<i>You can
do it, Logan, you can do it.</i>

1143
01:02:49,166 --> 01:02:53,001
<i>You're not supposed
to look down, just do it.</i>

1144
01:02:53,003 --> 01:02:55,937
<i>It's gonna go on YouTube.</i>

1145
01:02:55,939 --> 01:02:58,273
<i>YouTube, YouTube...</i>

1146
01:02:58,275 --> 01:03:00,542
You two, you two, you two

1147
01:03:00,544 --> 01:03:02,344
need to land this fucking plane.

1148
01:03:02,346 --> 01:03:04,780
I did not get laid Logan!

1149
01:03:07,818 --> 01:03:11,453
- Jenna, do you have service yet?
- Er... Yeah. Yeah, yeah here.

1150
01:03:11,989 --> 01:03:13,555
Oh, well, this is great service.

1151
01:03:16,493 --> 01:03:18,860
<i>Go on get the last
scoop out of the carton.</i>

1152
01:03:18,862 --> 01:03:21,863
<i>With the squatty potty you
get complete elimination.</i>

1153
01:03:21,865 --> 01:03:23,799
- Skip the ad.
- I can't, it won't let me.

1154
01:03:23,801 --> 01:03:26,281
<i>Yes, it will give you the best
poop of your life, guaranteed.</i>

1155
01:03:26,470 --> 01:03:28,503
Argh! If I die
because of this shit!

1156
01:03:29,006 --> 01:03:31,039
<i>Umm. They're good at pooping.</i>

1157
01:03:31,341 --> 01:03:33,308
Hey guys, it Connor
and today I'm gonna

1158
01:03:33,310 --> 01:03:35,410
be teaching you
how to land a passenger jet.

1159
01:03:35,979 --> 01:03:38,180
Flying is easy
and with the right education

1160
01:03:38,182 --> 01:03:39,581
and guidelines almost anyone

1161
01:03:39,583 --> 01:03:41,149
can learn the secrets of flight.

1162
01:03:41,151 --> 01:03:42,818
- Amazing. Ok.
- It's easy.

1163
01:03:42,820 --> 01:03:44,186
All you have to do
is pay attention...

1164
01:03:44,188 --> 01:03:46,087
Nobody will watch
your stupid videos.

1165
01:03:46,089 --> 01:03:47,189
Leave me alone, Becky.

1166
01:03:47,191 --> 01:03:48,890
Fuck you, Becky!

1167
01:03:48,892 --> 01:03:50,826
I'm telling mom about
your abortion.

1168
01:03:50,828 --> 01:03:51,827
Fuck you.

1169
01:03:51,829 --> 01:03:53,962
<i>Cool, okay, here are the basics.</i>

1170
01:03:53,964 --> 01:03:56,031
This is the yoke, it's
like the steering wheel

1171
01:03:56,033 --> 01:03:57,399
but here's the thing
you need to know,

1172
01:03:57,401 --> 01:03:58,867
the controls are inverted

1173
01:03:58,869 --> 01:04:01,036
so, up is down, and down is up.

1174
01:04:01,338 --> 01:04:02,504
Oh.

1175
01:04:03,907 --> 01:04:05,407
This knob controls
the flaps.

1176
01:04:05,409 --> 01:04:07,375
The flaps give
the plane lift and drag.

1177
01:04:07,377 --> 01:04:10,011
When landing you want
the flaps fully extended.

1178
01:04:10,013 --> 01:04:12,414
Remember, were going
for maximum air resistance.

1179
01:04:12,416 --> 01:04:14,883
- Turn the knob.
- Okay, okay.

1180
01:04:17,154 --> 01:04:19,487
The most important part of
landing is of course the...

1181
01:04:19,489 --> 01:04:21,256
Connor, your sister said you're

1182
01:04:21,258 --> 01:04:22,891
looking at anime porn again.

1183
01:04:22,893 --> 01:04:24,626
- She's lying.
- That's gross.

1184
01:04:24,628 --> 01:04:26,962
- God damn it, Connor!
- Fuck you, Becky!

1185
01:04:26,964 --> 01:04:28,930
When you get your own house
you can masturbate then.

1186
01:04:28,932 --> 01:04:31,299
- Okay, let's just skip ahead here.
- Yeah, skip that.

1187
01:04:31,301 --> 01:04:34,269
Once you've done that it's
time to engage the auto pilot,

1188
01:04:34,271 --> 01:04:37,939
the plane with literally land
itself, how cool is that?

1189
01:04:40,577 --> 01:04:41,577
It's okay.

1190
01:04:42,546 --> 01:04:45,013
No, my phone.

1191
01:04:45,015 --> 01:04:46,348
Okay.

1192
01:04:46,350 --> 01:04:48,216
Hey what's that? What is...?

1193
01:04:51,655 --> 01:04:53,521
<i>By the grace
of Steve Irwin</i>

1194
01:04:53,523 --> 01:04:55,624
<i>you're still
magically on course.</i>

1195
01:04:55,626 --> 01:04:58,226
<i>- Way to go, mate.</i>
- Benji, is that you?

1196
01:04:58,896 --> 01:05:01,029
Sure is, mate,
and by the look of it

1197
01:05:01,031 --> 01:05:02,898
you're still not out
of the woods yet.

1198
01:05:03,233 --> 01:05:05,634
- What?
- You're still quite fucked.

1199
01:05:05,636 --> 01:05:08,270
- How fucked?
- Mate, you're missing an engine, you're running out of fuel,

1200
01:05:08,272 --> 01:05:10,972
and you're dropping like
a dead albatross with diabetes.

1201
01:05:10,974 --> 01:05:13,108
Now normally I'd say
check the cross winds,

1202
01:05:13,110 --> 01:05:14,409
20 knots from the southeast

1203
01:05:14,411 --> 01:05:15,677
but I'd bet my last dollar I do

1204
01:05:15,679 --> 01:05:17,078
you don't understand
a word of that.

1205
01:05:17,080 --> 01:05:19,047
Yeah no shit I don't, Benji.

1206
01:05:19,049 --> 01:05:21,416
Just try to land on the white
line, fly straight and pray

1207
01:05:21,418 --> 01:05:24,085
you don't explode
on contact. And Logan.

1208
01:05:24,554 --> 01:05:26,454
- <i>What?</i>
- You owe me a dollar you do.

1209
01:05:26,456 --> 01:05:30,158
- I fucking hate you Benji!
- Hey lose the tude, mate.

1210
01:05:30,160 --> 01:05:32,994
Benji, I swear to God
if I survive this I'm...

1211
01:05:32,996 --> 01:05:35,463
Oi, wait a second,
would you look at that?

1212
01:05:35,465 --> 01:05:37,198
That koala looks like
Hugh Jackman.

1213
01:05:37,668 --> 01:05:39,301
I got to go bag me that koala.

1214
01:05:39,937 --> 01:05:41,236
Man the fort, Hansen.

1215
01:05:43,140 --> 01:05:45,340
Fuck the baby, I don't
want to die.

1216
01:06:04,161 --> 01:06:06,962
Aw! What...

1217
01:06:07,331 --> 01:06:10,598
- What the fuck?
- Get this fucking monkey off me.

1218
01:06:12,402 --> 01:06:13,402
Don't touch her.

1219
01:06:33,557 --> 01:06:35,290
Oh my god, Logan, Logan.

1220
01:06:35,726 --> 01:06:37,492
- Logan, we landed.
- What?

1221
01:06:37,494 --> 01:06:40,095
- We landed.
- Oh shit, oh my god.

1222
01:06:42,032 --> 01:06:43,032
We did it.

1223
01:06:45,202 --> 01:06:48,036
Oh, wait we're not stopping,
why aren't we stopping?

1224
01:06:48,038 --> 01:06:49,037
<i>All you have to do.</i>

1225
01:06:49,039 --> 01:06:50,071
Connor!

1226
01:06:50,073 --> 01:06:52,040
<i>Okay, once you've landed</i>

1227
01:06:52,042 --> 01:06:54,275
you're gonna want to hit
the breaks with both feet.

1228
01:06:55,145 --> 01:06:56,611
Brakes.

1229
01:07:03,453 --> 01:07:06,388
Thanks for watching and
don't forget to subscribe.

1230
01:07:15,332 --> 01:07:16,798
Oh my god, you did it.

1231
01:07:19,669 --> 01:07:21,703
No Jenna, we did it.

1232
01:07:22,305 --> 01:07:25,073
Please don't ruin the moment
with your cheesy bullshit.

1233
01:07:35,352 --> 01:07:36,651
We should probably
get off this thing.

1234
01:07:36,653 --> 01:07:38,219
Following a hijacking

1235
01:07:38,221 --> 01:07:41,489
and an engine failure
on board flight 1524

1236
01:07:41,491 --> 01:07:44,325
an incredible chain of events
has led to the rescue...

1237
01:07:44,327 --> 01:07:46,294
Fuck her right in the pussy.

1238
01:07:48,498 --> 01:07:50,665
Awesome!

1239
01:07:58,175 --> 01:07:59,307
Aye, mate.

1240
01:07:59,743 --> 01:08:00,642
Benji?

1241
01:08:00,644 --> 01:08:02,410
You're actually alive.

1242
01:08:02,412 --> 01:08:04,245
I owe you a dollar I do.

1243
01:08:04,247 --> 01:08:05,613
Don't worry about that.

1244
01:08:05,615 --> 01:08:07,782
Genuinely surprised
to see you alive.

1245
01:08:07,784 --> 01:08:10,452
Took a lot of guts
to do what you did today.

1246
01:08:16,860 --> 01:08:18,126
Hey buddy.

1247
01:08:18,128 --> 01:08:19,194
Hey man.

1248
01:08:19,196 --> 01:08:20,196
So?

1249
01:08:22,165 --> 01:08:25,700
- I failed, Log, I failed.
- Aw.

1250
01:08:26,703 --> 01:08:29,437
- Oh, come on.
- I guess blue balls is real.

1251
01:08:29,439 --> 01:08:30,705
It hurts, it hurts man.

1252
01:08:30,707 --> 01:08:33,174
No, eh, eh, don't say that man.

1253
01:08:33,510 --> 01:08:35,543
- You're still alive.
- I guess.

1254
01:08:36,513 --> 01:08:39,881
Your foreign exchange brother
is still a virgin.

1255
01:08:40,484 --> 01:08:43,852
No man, my brother
is still a virgin.

1256
01:08:47,524 --> 01:08:48,890
Such a tender moment.

1257
01:08:49,693 --> 01:08:50,693
Hey.

1258
01:08:51,228 --> 01:08:51,893
Hey.

1259
01:08:58,268 --> 01:09:00,869
Eugene, is that really you?

1260
01:09:01,571 --> 01:09:03,705
It's been 70 years.

1261
01:09:03,707 --> 01:09:07,408
The last orgasm I had
was in Normandy in your mouth.

1262
01:09:07,410 --> 01:09:10,311
Consider it VD day.

1263
01:09:16,253 --> 01:09:17,552
Bombs away.

1264
01:09:19,589 --> 01:09:20,589
Uh...

1265
01:09:21,291 --> 01:09:22,824
So Australia's pretty nice huh?

1266
01:09:23,593 --> 01:09:24,593
Yeah.

1267
01:09:26,563 --> 01:09:27,563
Yeah.

1268
01:09:29,199 --> 01:09:29,931
Er...

1269
01:09:29,933 --> 01:09:32,567
- Does it like hurt? Aw.
- Ow, ow, no I'm fine.

1270
01:09:32,569 --> 01:09:34,202
- Okay.
- I got a bandage.

1271
01:09:35,539 --> 01:09:37,705
- You did good driving that plane.
- Thanks.

1272
01:09:38,875 --> 01:09:40,515
Couldn't have done it
without my co-pilot.

1273
01:09:41,645 --> 01:09:43,545
What did I tell you
about being cheesy?

1274
01:09:43,747 --> 01:09:46,514
- To not be cheesy.
- Yeah, definitely stop.

1275
01:09:50,287 --> 01:09:53,788
So I've looked everywhere
and I can't find him.

1276
01:09:54,524 --> 01:09:55,524
Aw!

1277
01:09:56,760 --> 01:09:59,661
I think it safe to say
that your baby's gone.

1278
01:10:03,500 --> 01:10:05,266
Have you considered
adoption maybe?

1279
01:10:06,736 --> 01:10:10,738
I mean no, I, I thought I'd find
him on the plane, you know?

1280
01:10:10,740 --> 01:10:13,641
Right. That's horrible.

1281
01:10:14,411 --> 01:10:15,877
Well, here's some good news.

1282
01:10:16,813 --> 01:10:18,713
When that plane was going down

1283
01:10:18,715 --> 01:10:20,381
and I thought we were all dead,

1284
01:10:21,251 --> 01:10:24,819
I had one split second to
ejaculate into this Tupperware

1285
01:10:25,555 --> 01:10:27,422
so I could let my seed live on.

1286
01:10:27,924 --> 01:10:29,524
I made this out of my penis.

1287
01:10:29,926 --> 01:10:32,860
Put it in your vagina,
make a new baby.

1288
01:10:34,231 --> 01:10:37,565
Oh my god,
this is the nicest thing

1289
01:10:37,567 --> 01:10:39,300
any man's ever done for me.

1290
01:10:39,302 --> 01:10:40,302
It's pretty great.

1291
01:10:42,872 --> 01:10:43,871
- Thank you.
- Yeah.

1292
01:10:43,872 --> 01:10:45,432
But it still doesn't
bring my baby back.

1293
01:10:45,909 --> 01:10:47,308
What your old baby?

1294
01:10:47,744 --> 01:10:49,577
- Yeah.
- This is a brand new baby.

1295
01:10:50,380 --> 01:10:52,513
You ungrateful bitch.

1296
01:10:52,515 --> 01:10:54,749
Give me my seed back
you don't deserve it.

1297
01:10:55,018 --> 01:10:56,451
You do not deserve...

1298
01:10:57,654 --> 01:11:01,856
No I'm sorry, spit it out, spit
it out put it back in my vagina.

1299
01:11:01,858 --> 01:11:04,292
- Too late! It's too late!
- I'm sorry!

1300
01:11:04,294 --> 01:11:05,727
You've wasted my seed!

1301
01:11:05,729 --> 01:11:10,398
No, I'm sorry, put it back
in my vagina please.

1302
01:11:10,400 --> 01:11:11,666
Please, please.

1303
01:11:11,668 --> 01:11:17,939
It's going back into my penis,
I can feel it.

1304
01:11:18,375 --> 01:11:21,276
I have nothing else to live for.

1305
01:11:21,544 --> 01:11:23,411
I'm getting hard!

1306
01:11:24,447 --> 01:11:25,647
I guess this is goodbye.

1307
01:11:25,649 --> 01:11:28,616
Yup, I hope everything works
out with your girlfriend.

1308
01:11:29,686 --> 01:11:30,686
That was really brave.

1309
01:11:30,854 --> 01:11:33,021
- Come here.
- Bye.

1310
01:11:33,490 --> 01:11:35,857
Thank you so much,
I woke up on the toilet.

1311
01:11:35,859 --> 01:11:36,758
Jenna wait.

1312
01:11:36,760 --> 01:11:37,992
Thank you so much.

1313
01:11:39,596 --> 01:11:40,762
I don't even know you people.

1314
01:11:40,764 --> 01:11:42,397
- I'm your brother.
- I know you.

1315
01:11:51,641 --> 01:11:53,441
Okay, here we go.

1316
01:11:58,615 --> 01:11:59,615
You're excited?

1317
01:12:01,651 --> 01:12:03,685
- Yeah.
- This is it, right?

1318
01:12:03,687 --> 01:12:04,752
This is it. This is it.

1319
01:12:09,025 --> 01:12:10,425
Are you sure about this?

1320
01:12:11,628 --> 01:12:14,595
I've never been so sure
about anything in my life.

1321
01:12:16,866 --> 01:12:17,866
Logan!

1322
01:12:18,702 --> 01:12:20,535
Eh, yeah, it's me.

1323
01:12:20,770 --> 01:12:22,070
Er, I'm Logan.

1324
01:12:22,972 --> 01:12:25,373
Wait, you're not Logan.

1325
01:12:26,476 --> 01:12:28,643
- You sound different.
- Yeah.

1326
01:12:29,746 --> 01:12:32,714
I'm his foreign
exchange brother Juanpa.

1327
01:12:33,016 --> 01:12:34,882
- Mexico.
- So?

1328
01:12:35,919 --> 01:12:37,085
And I have an accent.

1329
01:12:43,026 --> 01:12:46,060
What? No, no, I can't
understand you though.

1330
01:12:46,062 --> 01:12:47,628
Can you say that again?

1331
01:12:48,698 --> 01:12:50,665
One more time, just,
just say it one more time.

1332
01:12:54,003 --> 01:12:57,638
Okay, okay, don't say
anything cheesy.

1333
01:12:58,742 --> 01:13:02,076
Jenna? It took me traveling half
way around the world to realize

1334
01:13:02,078 --> 01:13:04,512
- that I love you.
- I'm sorry your accent is just gnarly,

1335
01:13:04,514 --> 01:13:05,980
can you please just
repeat yourself?

1336
01:13:05,982 --> 01:13:08,383
Okay, uh, I guess you worked out

1337
01:13:08,385 --> 01:13:09,625
everything with your boyfriend.

1338
01:13:10,053 --> 01:13:12,854
Oh, yeah, the guac is extra,

1339
01:13:12,856 --> 01:13:14,589
I got it, I got it, I got it.

1340
01:13:14,791 --> 01:13:18,059
<i>Who was
that guy, he's fucking hot.</i>

1341
01:13:21,398 --> 01:13:24,165
You're gay,
you're a gay man, yeah!

1342
01:13:24,167 --> 01:13:26,634
Oh my god, so are you.

1343
01:13:26,636 --> 01:13:29,137
- No, no, I'm, I'm here for her, so.
- Logan?

1344
01:13:29,139 --> 01:13:31,572
But, but, but just one kiss,
that's all I ask.

1345
01:13:31,908 --> 01:13:34,075
Okay, fine,
but then you have to leave.

1346
01:13:35,979 --> 01:13:37,779
Now get out.

1347
01:13:38,181 --> 01:13:39,480
Wait, how did you
hear my thoughts?

1348
01:13:46,456 --> 01:13:48,990
Whoa yeah, I guess I always
thought you were a little bit...

1349
01:14:01,571 --> 01:14:03,471
- Yeah, take it off.
- Yeah.

1350
01:14:03,473 --> 01:14:05,139
- Hurry up.
- I will, I will.

1351
01:14:05,141 --> 01:14:07,208
Oh yeah. I'm going there.

1352
01:14:07,210 --> 01:14:09,076
- Oh yeah.
- Hurry up.

1353
01:14:09,746 --> 01:14:12,747
- Why can't you get it off?
- Yeah, yeah I got it.

1354
01:14:13,716 --> 01:14:16,784
- Is... er... aw... Wait, stop.
- Trying.

1355
01:14:17,620 --> 01:14:18,920
- Is this the right hole?
- No, no,

1356
01:14:18,922 --> 01:14:20,655
- no, no.
- No, no? Yes?

1357
01:14:20,657 --> 01:14:22,123
- No? Okay, yeah.
- There it is, yeah.

1358
01:14:22,125 --> 01:14:23,791
- Yeah, no, this one?
- Yeah, right there.

1359
01:14:23,793 --> 01:14:25,226
Okay, okay, okay.

1360
01:14:25,962 --> 01:14:28,563
Juanpa, Juanpa.

1361
01:14:28,565 --> 01:14:30,731
Oh, oh this feels amazing.

1362
01:14:30,733 --> 01:14:33,568
- I love your accent.
- I love<i> your</i> accent.

1363
01:14:33,570 --> 01:14:35,236
Talk dirty to me in Mexican.

1364
01:14:35,238 --> 01:14:37,118
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1365
01:14:55,992 --> 01:14:57,925
Wait I, I have to know.

1366
01:14:57,927 --> 01:14:59,727
What happened, like,
did she have a penis?

1367
01:15:03,833 --> 01:15:05,500
What the fuck?

1368
01:15:05,502 --> 01:15:08,069
Daddy, I thought you were gone.

1369
01:15:08,538 --> 01:15:13,174
Oh my god, your dad is black.
I mean that's, that's cool, he's black.

1370
01:15:13,877 --> 01:15:15,977
I can't stop, I can't stop.

1371
01:15:19,616 --> 01:15:22,016
Daddy you have...

1372
01:15:22,018 --> 01:15:23,918
- Your dad's black.
- I'm adopted.

1373
01:15:23,920 --> 01:15:27,288
Oh my god, I'm adopted too,
we have so much in common.

1374
01:15:27,290 --> 01:15:29,524
Swear I'm gonna kill
your dumb ass.

1375
01:15:29,526 --> 01:15:30,925
I love you, Juanpa.

1376
01:15:30,927 --> 01:15:32,793
It's pronounced Juanpa.

1377
01:15:32,795 --> 01:15:33,895
I'm whooping your ass.

1378
01:15:33,897 --> 01:15:35,530
Run Juanpa, run.

1379
01:15:35,532 --> 01:15:38,099
Daddy stop, run, go, go.

1380
01:15:42,972 --> 01:15:44,906
Get it off, please!

1381
01:15:49,312 --> 01:15:51,712
I love you, Juanpa.

1382
01:15:53,249 --> 01:15:56,117
- I love you my awesome princess.
- You're just like your mother.

1383
01:15:56,119 --> 01:15:57,885
- I love you so much.
- Put some clothes on.

1384
01:15:57,887 --> 01:16:00,187
- I have clothes on.
- Nice to meet you, sir.

1385
01:16:00,189 --> 01:16:03,090
I'm gonna cut your dick off
and feed it to the drop bears.

1386
01:16:03,092 --> 01:16:04,792
Motherfucker
I'm going to kill you.

1387
01:16:04,794 --> 01:16:06,994
- Daddy, stop it.
- Get back here.

1388
01:16:06,996 --> 01:16:09,964
Run, Juanpa run!

1389
01:16:10,800 --> 01:16:12,900
Well not bad.

1390
01:16:13,303 --> 01:16:17,171
<i>♪ Jungle life
I'm living in the open ♪</i>

1391
01:16:17,774 --> 01:16:21,676
<i>♪ Native beat that carries on ♪</i>

1392
01:16:22,145 --> 01:16:25,613
<i>♪ Burning bright
A fire that blows the... ♪</i>

1393
01:16:25,615 --> 01:16:27,915
Hey Mr. Kangaroo,
I just had sex,

1394
01:16:27,917 --> 01:16:30,718
go tell all your kangaroo
friends I just had sex.

1395
01:16:30,720 --> 01:16:32,720
Come on give me a fist bump.

1396
01:16:32,722 --> 01:16:34,355
Alright, let's go,
let's go man, let's celebrate.

1397
01:16:34,357 --> 01:16:39,293
<i>♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪</i>

1398
01:16:39,295 --> 01:16:42,930
<i>♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪</i>

1399
01:16:44,000 --> 01:16:46,133
Today we're gonna learn
how to make a hang glider

1400
01:16:46,135 --> 01:16:48,769
out of cardboard,
duct tape, and a chin up bar...

1401
01:16:48,771 --> 01:16:51,238
No one's gonna watch
your stupid videos, Connor.

1402
01:16:53,610 --> 01:16:54,775
Logan Paul!

1403
01:16:54,777 --> 01:16:56,143
You're a fucking hero, Connor.

1404
01:16:56,145 --> 01:16:58,279
- Logan, I love you.
- Shut up, Becky!

1405
01:16:58,281 --> 01:17:01,148
- Let's make that hang glider, buddy.
- Yeah!

1406
01:17:04,854 --> 01:17:09,857
Argh! My femurs.
Aw! I can see my bones!

1407
01:17:09,859 --> 01:17:13,628
<i>♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪</i>

1408
01:17:13,630 --> 01:17:18,065
<i>♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪</i>

1409
01:17:18,067 --> 01:17:22,236
<i>♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪</i>

1410
01:17:22,238 --> 01:17:27,308
<i>♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪</i>

1411
01:17:29,646 --> 01:17:30,662
<i>♪ Night tonight ♪</i>

1412
01:17:30,663 --> 01:17:31,679
<i>♪ Give me the other
Give me the other ♪</i>

1413
01:17:31,681 --> 01:17:32,681
<i>♪ Chance tonight ♪</i>

1414
01:17:34,017 --> 01:17:36,083
<i>♪ Give me the other
Give me the other ♪</i>

1415
01:17:36,085 --> 01:17:37,718
<i>♪ Night to night ♪</i>

1416
01:17:38,287 --> 01:17:43,391
<i>♪ Give me the other
Give me the other world! ♪</i>

1417
01:17:44,427 --> 01:17:48,029
<i>♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪</i>

1418
01:17:57,373 --> 01:17:58,439
Ow!

1419
01:18:02,211 --> 01:18:03,878
Bitch, you saved my life.



  
  
 
 


 
  

 

 
  
 
 

