1
00:00:01,360 --> 00:00:04,200
{\an8}THIS FILM WAS MADE BEFORE THE
FULL-SCALE RUSSIAN INVASION OF UKRAINE

2
00:00:04,280 --> 00:00:05,080
{\an8}KYIV 2021

3
00:01:02,160 --> 00:01:03,280
{\an8}Whoa! Well, slowpoke,

4
00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:06,400
{\an8}you haven't even been married yet
and you're already so slow.

5
00:01:06,880 --> 00:01:09,280
{\an8}I grew older by a few
years, waiting for you.

6
00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:11,920
{\an8}You know, bike dude,
why don't you hurry up a bit slower?

7
00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:13,320
{\an8}Hurry up slower.

8
00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:18,120
{\an8}Look, you've had enough fun
riding that Porsche. A bet is a bet.

9
00:01:18,200 --> 00:01:21,520
{\an8}Whoever gets married first
gives away his wheels.

10
00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:23,080
{\an8}You bought the wedding ring,

11
00:01:23,160 --> 00:01:25,200
{\an8}and now you have
to hand over your keys, Oleh.

12
00:01:27,480 --> 00:01:29,360
{\an8}Listen, Pete,

13
00:01:29,880 --> 00:01:32,920
aren't you fed up with
our endless childish bets?

14
00:01:34,000 --> 00:01:36,800
- Alright, let's see who gets further?
- Piece of cake!

15
00:01:36,880 --> 00:01:37,760
Who can hang longer?

16
00:01:40,120 --> 00:01:41,080
The whole onion?

17
00:01:41,680 --> 00:01:42,520
All of it!

18
00:01:43,400 --> 00:01:45,000
And what do I get?

19
00:01:45,520 --> 00:01:47,480
- Tetris!
- Piece of cake!

20
00:01:52,360 --> 00:01:55,800
Uh! No, no. I was joking.
My dad just bought it for me.

21
00:01:57,120 --> 00:01:59,840
Help, Peter Pan has gone mad!

22
00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:03,520
The excuses are starting?

23
00:02:04,360 --> 00:02:07,080
Here we go: a special
Ukrainian cheapskate, am I right?

24
00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:10,199
Look here, old chap.

25
00:02:10,280 --> 00:02:13,160
What on earth
do you need that Porsche for?

26
00:02:13,960 --> 00:02:16,920
A ringed man has to think
about a family station wagon

27
00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:21,000
to fit the baby car seat
and transport the mother-in-law's plants.

28
00:02:24,680 --> 00:02:27,120
Here, choke on it!

29
00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:31,120
I'll buy two new ones, got it? By the way,
something's wrong with the engine.

30
00:02:31,200 --> 00:02:33,400
Really? You're scaring
a porcupine with your bare ass.

31
00:02:33,480 --> 00:02:36,880
As the owner of a chain
of car repair garages, I'll handle it.

32
00:02:37,920 --> 00:02:41,480
All right, park my fleet.

33
00:02:42,280 --> 00:02:44,400
We're going to have a grand party!

34
00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:47,920
The owner of a car repair garage.

35
00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:49,880
A car repair garage emperor!

36
00:03:04,120 --> 00:03:06,840
I want to drink
to true men's entertainment.

37
00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:08,920
Let's drink to fishing.

38
00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:12,200
- To working out.
- To football.

39
00:03:12,280 --> 00:03:15,400
- To saunas.
- To car racing.

40
00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:18,520
To safaris instead
of Egypt with her mother.

41
00:03:18,600 --> 00:03:21,360
- To freedom.
- You make me sick!

42
00:03:21,440 --> 00:03:24,840
Petro, you've been walking
this earth for over 30 years

43
00:03:24,920 --> 00:03:27,200
and still haven't learned that family life

44
00:03:27,280 --> 00:03:30,440
does not cancel out fun
but actually adds to it.

45
00:03:30,520 --> 00:03:33,720
But our pathological bachelor will never
be able to find out about this.

46
00:03:33,800 --> 00:03:36,680
Why so? Because you can't.

47
00:03:38,200 --> 00:03:40,120
Can't? Can't.

48
00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:43,520
You can't. You can't. You can't.

49
00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:46,080
Wait, stop, stop. What
do you mean "I can't".

50
00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:49,800
You can't be with one woman
for more than a single night.

51
00:03:49,880 --> 00:03:50,680
You can't.

52
00:03:50,760 --> 00:03:53,280
Hello idiots, don't go too far.
It's that I don't want to -

53
00:03:53,360 --> 00:03:54,440
those are different things...

54
00:03:54,520 --> 00:03:58,800
With a normal one, friend,
and not with one of these hooker types.

55
00:03:58,880 --> 00:04:00,480
Can't do it?

56
00:04:01,120 --> 00:04:02,360
For who? For me!?

57
00:04:02,440 --> 00:04:04,320
You can't. I can see it. Forget it.

58
00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:06,680
- Boys, it's a piece of cake!
- Piece of cake?

59
00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:10,080
Well then let's bet on my Porsche,
then I can win it back.

60
00:04:10,160 --> 00:04:15,400
You want to win your Porsche back,
I understand, but what's in it for me?

61
00:04:15,480 --> 00:04:17,480
- Yeah, what's in it for him?
- Yeah, what?

62
00:04:17,560 --> 00:04:22,000
You sly old Peter Pan. Lay off!

63
00:04:23,280 --> 00:04:25,320
Bingo! Bingo! Bingo!

64
00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:27,840
If Oleh loses,

65
00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:31,960
he gives all of us
foot massages in the sauna!

66
00:04:33,760 --> 00:04:35,000
No problem!

67
00:04:35,080 --> 00:04:38,640
And never call me Peter Pan again.

68
00:04:39,840 --> 00:04:41,840
How long do I have
to spend with the chick?

69
00:04:41,920 --> 00:04:46,560
- Two days? Three? I'm ready for five.
- No, no, no, Pete.

70
00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:48,360
You are so big but so shallow.

71
00:04:48,440 --> 00:04:49,920
Let's do a month.

72
00:04:50,400 --> 00:04:53,160
- What?
- A month. Handshake?

73
00:04:53,240 --> 00:04:55,360
Even a leg shake!
Let's go, boys, make it official.

74
00:05:29,080 --> 00:05:31,280
I'm already dead and in hell,

75
00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:36,160
but instead of screams
I hear the bloody doorbell.

76
00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:39,800
Hell is on its way.

77
00:05:41,120 --> 00:05:44,080
My sister Veronika is moving
in with you tomorrow. Remember?

78
00:05:44,160 --> 00:05:45,760
This bet is going to be the end of you.

79
00:05:45,840 --> 00:05:47,160
Your younger sister?

80
00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:49,520
Damn, the bet.

81
00:05:49,600 --> 00:05:51,320
She left her husband, you know,

82
00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:53,640
but I can't bring my sis to my place,

83
00:05:53,720 --> 00:05:55,920
my Yasya will kill me, you see?

84
00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:57,960
How did I fall for this?

85
00:05:58,040 --> 00:06:00,880
But, man, you've got enough
space even for a horse race.

86
00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:02,920
You got drunk and fell for it.

87
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:06,240
Veronika it shall be. Cheers!

88
00:06:07,720 --> 00:06:11,480
Go, go, your new neighbor must be waiting.

89
00:06:22,520 --> 00:06:23,880
Good morning.

90
00:06:28,240 --> 00:06:29,040
Hello.

91
00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:33,480
The little one really has
grown a bit. Veronika?

92
00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:44,720
I would rather kiss this frog
than your chubby tattle tale sister.

93
00:06:45,680 --> 00:06:48,000
I bet you won't kiss it. You can't do it.

94
00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:49,280
Piece of cake!

95
00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:03,400
Yes, Petro, it's me.

96
00:07:09,040 --> 00:07:11,200
Sorry for waking you up.

97
00:07:17,040 --> 00:07:18,600
Your highness.

98
00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:21,560
Coffee, tea, or pickle juice?

99
00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:25,120
Your sense of humor remains the same.

100
00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:27,520
Unique?

101
00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:32,720
Yes, I doubt someone could repeat it.

102
00:07:34,880 --> 00:07:38,560
Very original place.

103
00:07:39,160 --> 00:07:41,280
A humble bachelor shack.

104
00:07:42,560 --> 00:07:45,120
By the way, I'm very grateful,

105
00:07:45,200 --> 00:07:49,680
it's been
a very difficult time in my life.

106
00:07:56,920 --> 00:07:59,400
Good day. Veronika.

107
00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:00,280
I know.

108
00:08:02,240 --> 00:08:03,480
This is...

109
00:08:06,120 --> 00:08:07,080
Lana.

110
00:08:07,160 --> 00:08:10,000
Yes, Lana. My housekeeper.

111
00:08:12,480 --> 00:08:18,000
And my shift is over.
By the way, his mop is lame.

112
00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:24,640
So, why are we standing there?
Who are we waiting for?

113
00:08:24,720 --> 00:08:25,880
Our bedroom is over there.

114
00:08:27,680 --> 00:08:31,080
Just kidding. Come in
wherever Feng Shui takes you.

115
00:08:39,600 --> 00:08:43,440
Thank you for helping us out, we...

116
00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:44,680
Please, don't start,

117
00:08:44,760 --> 00:08:47,200
my head is still ringing
after the last night.

118
00:08:47,720 --> 00:08:50,480
Look, once I'm feeling a bit better,
then I'll come

119
00:08:50,560 --> 00:08:53,200
and make you feel a bit better
with eclairs and champagne.

120
00:08:53,280 --> 00:08:56,680
House warming party, after all, neighbor.

121
00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:08,600
Tea is like in Thailand.

122
00:09:08,680 --> 00:09:10,720
God, don't remind me about Thailand.

123
00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:13,600
What's up? What's up? What's up?

124
00:09:13,680 --> 00:09:16,440
So, did little sister Veronika move in?

125
00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:19,080
What can I say, boys?

126
00:09:19,160 --> 00:09:21,240
Ugly, right? I thought so.

127
00:09:21,320 --> 00:09:24,560
Well come on, show us. Is she cross-eyed?
Show us some pics.

128
00:09:24,640 --> 00:09:26,200
Take that, morons!

129
00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:28,400
What, a hot Mary Poppins, eh?

130
00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:29,880
Reminds me of my geography teacher.

131
00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:32,920
Agree. Right hemisphere. Left hemisphere.

132
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:37,000
What an intelligent face! And the cheeks.

133
00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:38,760
Petro hasn't seen her face yet.

134
00:09:38,840 --> 00:09:42,280
Listen, I'm ready to live
this family life for a month.

135
00:09:42,360 --> 00:09:44,160
Thanks for this, Oleh!

136
00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:46,360
Hey, hey, hey. Watch it, buddy.

137
00:09:46,440 --> 00:09:49,440
Hey, what's up? You settle
such a chick into my sexodrome,

138
00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:53,520
- and I'm supposed to declare celibacy?
- No promises, no forgiveness,

139
00:09:54,920 --> 00:09:58,400
everything happened by itself.

140
00:09:58,480 --> 00:10:00,840
Right, hello, idiots, that's my sister.

141
00:10:00,920 --> 00:10:02,280
She's not your mother.

142
00:10:02,360 --> 00:10:04,600
Petro, what did we bet on?

143
00:10:04,680 --> 00:10:07,480
Right, that you survive
under one roof with her,

144
00:10:07,560 --> 00:10:09,800
but nobody mentioned sex.
Although, you know,

145
00:10:09,880 --> 00:10:13,640
you're definitely not her type.

146
00:10:35,080 --> 00:10:41,400
Veronika, I'm home.

147
00:10:41,480 --> 00:10:42,280
What?

148
00:10:44,160 --> 00:10:46,400
Uncle Petro!

149
00:10:50,680 --> 00:10:53,800
Children, children,
what's with the manners?

150
00:10:53,880 --> 00:10:59,720
Come here and let's try again:
good day, uncle Petro.

151
00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:03,120
Good day, uncle Petro.

152
00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:05,240
- I'm Marta!
- I'm Marko!

153
00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:08,520
They heard a lot about you
and didn't expect you back so soon.

154
00:11:08,600 --> 00:11:12,720
I wasn't expecting to be back
either. Are they yours?

155
00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:13,920
Mine!

156
00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:18,080
Wow! I was only away for half a day.

157
00:11:18,880 --> 00:11:21,800
Listen, I dressed "yours" up a bit.

158
00:11:25,640 --> 00:11:27,840
Is that OK? Kids...

159
00:11:35,200 --> 00:11:36,320
Hello.

160
00:11:36,400 --> 00:11:38,200
Greetings, bro.

161
00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:40,400
You didn't say that she would
be coming with extra luggage.

162
00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:42,000
Nobody promised that it would be easy.

163
00:11:42,080 --> 00:11:43,640
Listen, Mr. Promise,

164
00:11:43,720 --> 00:11:45,520
I didn't sign up for this.

165
00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:50,760
You told me about one chick, I emphasize -
one, and not an entire scouts camp.

166
00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:53,200
So, the bet is off.
That's a violation of the agreement.

167
00:11:53,280 --> 00:11:55,040
That's it? Did you calm down?

168
00:11:55,120 --> 00:11:56,240
No, I didn't calm down.

169
00:11:56,320 --> 00:11:58,800
You didn't calm down?
Then let's call the guys

170
00:11:58,880 --> 00:12:01,280
and let them decide whether this is
a violation or not.

171
00:12:04,320 --> 00:12:06,000
Greetings, arbitration court.

172
00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:09,920
So tell me, isn't this cheating?
What did we agree to?

173
00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:13,760
One month with a woman and then Oleh
becomes my Thai massage woman, right?

174
00:12:13,840 --> 00:12:14,640
Yes, exactly.

175
00:12:14,720 --> 00:12:18,080
And if you lose,
you return the hot rod to Oleh.

176
00:12:18,160 --> 00:12:20,000
Yeah, I remember about your hot rod,

177
00:12:20,080 --> 00:12:21,840
but the chick didn't show up alone.

178
00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:25,480
- Who did she come with!?
- There's a few of them! I want the blonde!

179
00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:28,320
Quiet! Stop annoying me.

180
00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:30,840
She's showed up with
extra luggage. Double extra.

181
00:12:31,680 --> 00:12:33,240
Oh, oh, kids.

182
00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:36,200
Therefore, it's over.
The bet is off. Evacuation begins.

183
00:12:36,280 --> 00:12:38,520
Oleh, get rid of your refugees.

184
00:12:39,120 --> 00:12:42,840
On the other hand, wait,
there's just one chick, right?

185
00:12:42,920 --> 00:12:46,240
That's right. And her "luggage"
is a part of her.

186
00:12:46,320 --> 00:12:48,320
When someone brings a car to your garage,

187
00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:49,840
you don't empty the trunk, do you?

188
00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:52,920
- No, you don't.
- So, don't leave the chick.

189
00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:54,240
Hello, dumb asses,

190
00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:56,240
maybe you can stop
calling my sister a chick?

191
00:12:56,320 --> 00:12:58,600
No, no, no, we're just
saying it figuratively.

192
00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:02,680
And figuratively your little sister
is not bad, quite sexy!

193
00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:06,800
Although we only saw her rear bumper.

194
00:13:06,880 --> 00:13:09,440
Hey, idiots, I'll give you
such a rear bumper that you'll be

195
00:13:09,520 --> 00:13:12,240
forced to shove your
tailpipes into your gas tanks.

196
00:13:12,320 --> 00:13:14,040
Right, Petro, decide:

197
00:13:14,120 --> 00:13:18,320
either you continue
or you admit that you can't do it.

198
00:13:19,440 --> 00:13:21,520
Quiet, yes, I can.

199
00:13:21,600 --> 00:13:24,200
I'll make it through
this mommy with her little brats.

200
00:13:25,400 --> 00:13:26,560
But there is one "but"...

201
00:13:27,120 --> 00:13:28,520
What else?

202
00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:31,680
If they take off earlier, then I win?

203
00:13:32,160 --> 00:13:34,640
Well, basically, yes.

204
00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:36,680
A technical victory.

205
00:13:36,760 --> 00:13:41,120
So hey, good luck, Peter Pan!

206
00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:45,320
My feet are already waiting for you, Oleh.

207
00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:01,160
What's with the Disneyland in my loft?

208
00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:04,280
We just added some color,

209
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:07,600
so it won't be so gloomy.

210
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:08,560
Gloomy?

211
00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:09,600
Yes!

212
00:14:09,680 --> 00:14:11,280
It's only gloomy here in the morning!

213
00:14:11,360 --> 00:14:13,640
At night it's a real Las Vegas, wow!

214
00:14:14,560 --> 00:14:18,480
Yes, I swept a few gaming chips
out of your corners.

215
00:14:22,280 --> 00:14:24,400
Oh, I didn't know
people eat stuff like this.

216
00:14:24,480 --> 00:14:26,760
Children, come and eat.

217
00:14:26,840 --> 00:14:28,680
Hurray!

218
00:14:30,080 --> 00:14:31,280
Will you join us?

219
00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:34,920
Diet table number 6. Thanks,
but I don't eat hospital food.

220
00:14:50,280 --> 00:14:53,160
Which one should I eat?
This one or that one?

221
00:15:11,080 --> 00:15:13,680
Mom, can we have some eclairs?

222
00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:16,400
Sweets at night?

223
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:17,480
Of course not.

224
00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:20,080
We don't want to ruin our teeth, right?

225
00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:22,520
And, besides, they're packed
with trans fats.

226
00:15:22,600 --> 00:15:24,560
Which the body can't get rid of.

227
00:15:25,320 --> 00:15:28,640
Very, very tasty trans fats.

228
00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:33,080
Salted caramel flavor and strawberry.

229
00:15:36,720 --> 00:15:39,520
But you keep eating your broccoli,
you heard your mom?

230
00:15:55,600 --> 00:15:58,080
Hello, I need to tie
my horse, who's in there?

231
00:15:58,720 --> 00:16:01,480
Wait, I'll be fast, 15 minutes.

232
00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:04,600
The bigger they are the harder they fall.

233
00:16:04,680 --> 00:16:07,400
- Give it back, it's mine!
- I won't.

234
00:16:07,480 --> 00:16:09,200
I said: right now.

235
00:16:09,680 --> 00:16:13,640
Stop ordering me around, baby boss!

236
00:16:13,720 --> 00:16:15,080
Hey, I don't get it, hello!

237
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,640
What kind of bubble party is this?

238
00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:22,920
What? Is that my $100 bottle of Dior?

239
00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:25,640
We had to wash our duck.

240
00:16:25,720 --> 00:16:28,040
It was in the sandbox today.

241
00:16:29,480 --> 00:16:30,960
Give that to me!

242
00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:34,520
Your ducky says "Goodbye". Quack-quack.

243
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:40,600
Quiet!

244
00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:41,960
What's going on here?

245
00:16:42,040 --> 00:16:43,960
The aquarium overflowed its banks

246
00:16:44,040 --> 00:16:45,400
and my Dior went down the drain.

247
00:16:45,480 --> 00:16:49,600
Do they always bathe like a herd
of drunk beavers from Zhytomyr?

248
00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:53,440
- How could you take other people's stuff?
- Yeah.

249
00:16:55,600 --> 00:16:58,680
You are punished: two poems
from Sosura, three from Tychyna.

250
00:16:59,360 --> 00:17:02,800
<i>The tractor in the field goes "wroom"
For peace we vouch</i>

251
00:17:02,880 --> 00:17:07,400
Mom, he drowned our duck.

252
00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:37,080
Our car will be here
in four minutes. A Skoda Fabia.

253
00:17:37,160 --> 00:17:38,800
Skoda Fabia?

254
00:17:44,600 --> 00:17:46,440
Maybe we should take the subway instead?

255
00:17:46,920 --> 00:17:49,440
Couldn't you order a premium-class car?

256
00:17:49,520 --> 00:17:51,360
I did, Yasya, my dear, I did.

257
00:17:51,440 --> 00:17:55,040
There just weren't any available cars.

258
00:17:55,920 --> 00:17:58,520
Whatever was available
is what crawled to us.

259
00:17:58,600 --> 00:18:01,200
And when is our Porsche
going to crawl to us?

260
00:18:01,720 --> 00:18:02,840
Soon, soon, soon.

261
00:18:02,920 --> 00:18:06,880
I'm waiting for one part to come
from London. It's taking forever.

262
00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:09,280
But as soon as it comes,
I'll pick it up from the garage.

263
00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:10,840
A part?

264
00:18:11,880 --> 00:18:12,920
The little Porsche.

265
00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:14,200
The little Porsche.

266
00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:19,840
Yes. Oh, and here is our Skoda.

267
00:18:25,120 --> 00:18:26,440
What the hell is this?

268
00:18:31,200 --> 00:18:33,840
Alright, little ones,
get out of here quickly.

269
00:18:33,920 --> 00:18:36,200
This is my relaxing room.
Children are forbidden here.

270
00:18:36,280 --> 00:18:38,240
This is our playroom.

271
00:18:38,800 --> 00:18:40,080
It's my playroom.

272
00:18:40,160 --> 00:18:42,600
Do adults play?

273
00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:43,960
You bet!

274
00:18:46,320 --> 00:18:49,800
Do you like playing cops and robbers?

275
00:18:50,320 --> 00:18:53,160
One of my girlfriends likes
to play that game. Hand it over!

276
00:18:53,240 --> 00:18:55,040
What game is this for?

277
00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:58,440
That's Cossacks and Robbers.

278
00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:00,280
Have you ever seen
a Cossack without a whip?

279
00:19:00,360 --> 00:19:01,840
Where are your dolls?

280
00:19:01,920 --> 00:19:03,520
They're on holiday for a month.

281
00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:05,880
Hand it over, I said.

282
00:19:05,960 --> 00:19:08,640
Basically, our wigwam
didn't fit in mom's bedroom.

283
00:19:08,720 --> 00:19:11,560
Uncle Petro, do you mind if we sleep here?

284
00:19:11,640 --> 00:19:12,560
I mind.

285
00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:15,160
Turn off the lights before
our mother gets home.

286
00:19:15,240 --> 00:19:17,800
We're supposed to be sleeping by now.

287
00:19:18,880 --> 00:19:21,800
Damn it, I have nowhere
to go in my own home!

288
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:29,880
Damn all these drunk bets in this city.

289
00:19:47,800 --> 00:19:50,960
<i>Kitten! Coo-coo from Paris!</i>

290
00:19:52,080 --> 00:19:53,520
<i>Talk to me.</i>

291
00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:58,120
<i>I really want a new iPhone.</i>

292
00:19:58,680 --> 00:20:01,000
Hey cutie. Meow!

293
00:20:01,720 --> 00:20:03,520
<i>Look what's waiting for you.</i>

294
00:20:08,120 --> 00:20:09,440
And a bit lower?

295
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,600
I can go even lower.

296
00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:18,920
At least something enjoyable today.

297
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:22,600
<i>My plane arrives at Boryspil airport
in Kyiv, early in the morning.</i>

298
00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:26,200
<i>Wait for me with my favorite croissants.</i>

299
00:20:31,280 --> 00:20:33,880
Listen, kitten, I'm busy tomorrow.

300
00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:35,400
<i>What? Did you forget?</i>

301
00:20:35,480 --> 00:20:37,560
<i>Tomorrow we're having a "fucking" day.</i>

302
00:20:38,440 --> 00:20:40,960
Baby, I'm having a "fucking"
month here, sweetie.

303
00:20:42,880 --> 00:20:45,040
Wow! The kids are finally sleeping.

304
00:20:45,120 --> 00:20:46,560
Shall we celebrate the housewarming?

305
00:20:48,360 --> 00:20:50,200
- Hold these.
- Welcome.

306
00:20:50,280 --> 00:20:55,120
What a beautiful view
from your penthouse, wow!

307
00:20:56,280 --> 00:20:58,880
I see that you've become
a successful businessman.

308
00:20:59,360 --> 00:21:02,880
Having your own chain
of car repair garages is pretty big.

309
00:21:04,720 --> 00:21:08,840
But there's nothing odd about that,
you've always had hands of gold.

310
00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:13,320
I remember how you used to fix
all the bicycles on our street.

311
00:21:19,040 --> 00:21:21,120
There you go, junior. Ride!

312
00:21:21,720 --> 00:21:23,320
Are you sure it works?

313
00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:25,600
Maybe we can test it out?

314
00:21:25,680 --> 00:21:28,200
Test what out? Whether my hands
grow out of my ass?

315
00:21:28,280 --> 00:21:30,680
Piece of cake! Irka, get on.

316
00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:44,480
I also fulfilled my dream -

317
00:21:45,760 --> 00:21:47,080
I graduated from the Conservatory.

318
00:21:47,160 --> 00:21:48,880
But then I got married,

319
00:21:48,960 --> 00:21:51,400
had children and didn't work a single day

320
00:21:51,480 --> 00:21:55,120
because of that tyrant and psychopath.

321
00:21:55,200 --> 00:21:56,880
I lived with him for eight years.

322
00:21:59,120 --> 00:22:03,120
And now I'm holding online music lessons

323
00:22:04,520 --> 00:22:06,120
and I dream to one day...

324
00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:07,960
Listen, I'm not a very good psychologist.

325
00:22:08,520 --> 00:22:10,680
If you need to tell
someone about your troubles,

326
00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:12,920
then I can give you a phone
number of a professional.

327
00:22:15,360 --> 00:22:16,400
No, thanks.

328
00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:22,000
Thank you for letting us
live with you for a little,

329
00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:25,080
I will definitely find a job soon

330
00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:27,640
and we will free you from our presence.

331
00:22:30,080 --> 00:22:32,760
Woah! Let's drink to that, babe!

332
00:22:46,640 --> 00:22:49,240
Uncle Petro, let's learn some poems.

333
00:22:49,320 --> 00:22:52,840
Uncle Petro, make us some porridge.

334
00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:55,120
Check my math.

335
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:56,640
Make me a braid.

336
00:22:56,720 --> 00:22:57,880
Buy me a toy.

337
00:22:57,960 --> 00:22:59,520
Read us a book.

338
00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:01,120
Wipe my bum, I took a poo.

339
00:23:35,640 --> 00:23:36,440
Quiet!

340
00:23:36,520 --> 00:23:39,520
You jerk! And I thought
I rang the wrong door.

341
00:23:39,600 --> 00:23:42,360
Bunny, I mean, kitten, please, wait!

342
00:23:42,440 --> 00:23:45,000
Mom, a poor lady came
knocking at our door!

343
00:23:45,080 --> 00:23:47,640
Yes, very poor, totally naked,

344
00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:50,720
poor thing, she didn't even
have the money for clothing!

345
00:23:50,800 --> 00:23:55,240
Right, kids, don't worry,
that lady definitely knows

346
00:23:55,320 --> 00:23:56,800
how to make money to buy clothing.

347
00:23:58,800 --> 00:24:00,120
Little demons.

348
00:24:05,640 --> 00:24:06,920
What did that lady bring?

349
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:09,920
What did the lady bring?
They're some kind of pills!

350
00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:10,800
What do they cure?

351
00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:13,280
Having kids.

352
00:24:14,400 --> 00:24:16,120
Let's go! March to your mother.

353
00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:34,720
Damn kids!

354
00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:49,640
I won't give it!

355
00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:51,120
Give it to me!

356
00:24:51,840 --> 00:24:54,760
- Enough!
- Let go! I don't want!

357
00:24:54,840 --> 00:24:57,480
I'm telling you, enough.

358
00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:03,200
Shit! Where did you all come from?

359
00:25:06,200 --> 00:25:08,040
Hey, bro, how's life?

360
00:25:08,120 --> 00:25:11,640
How do you married losers survive, eh?

361
00:25:11,720 --> 00:25:15,520
How? Hey! You can just be
honest and admit your defeat,

362
00:25:15,600 --> 00:25:17,560
no one will judge you.

363
00:25:17,640 --> 00:25:20,320
Listen, don't you want
to take the kids to your place?

364
00:25:20,400 --> 00:25:21,520
They're your niece and nephew, after all.

365
00:25:21,600 --> 00:25:23,640
Your Asya can practice.

366
00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:25,440
No, no, no. No way, man.

367
00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:29,040
Look, either you get
the woman fully equipped,

368
00:25:29,120 --> 00:25:32,920
or you admit that you lost,
and I get the Porsche!

369
00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:34,440
Go to hell without your Porsche!

370
00:25:34,520 --> 00:25:38,320
Get ready to get the jojoba
butter scrub for my feet!

371
00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:41,880
Ok, ok, man, stop crying.

372
00:25:42,360 --> 00:25:46,400
Tonight, the guys and I are going to come
over and watch football at your place.

373
00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:48,640
Veronika is going to an interview tonight

374
00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:53,280
and asked me to look after the kids,
since she doesn't trust you.

375
00:25:53,880 --> 00:25:55,320
Oh, Yasya is calling, bye.

376
00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:58,120
Oh, Yasya's calling, my love, my love.

377
00:25:58,200 --> 00:25:59,600
You're henpecked!

378
00:26:07,400 --> 00:26:11,080
Freedom, freedom, soon!

379
00:26:11,160 --> 00:26:15,480
Old man, you can do it, I believe in you.

380
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:53,960
E is for experience!

381
00:27:06,120 --> 00:27:07,880
M is for morons!

382
00:28:15,440 --> 00:28:17,160
Please give me a minute.

383
00:28:23,920 --> 00:28:25,960
Sorry, can you turn it down?

384
00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:27,680
I've got a music lesson,

385
00:28:27,760 --> 00:28:31,880
real music: Mozart, Vivaldi, Bach.

386
00:28:31,960 --> 00:28:33,240
- Hm, Bach?
- Yes.

387
00:28:33,320 --> 00:28:37,800
Look: Bach, Bach, Bach, one more, Bach.

388
00:28:37,880 --> 00:28:40,600
Bach, Bach, Bach!

389
00:28:40,680 --> 00:28:43,200
This is my house and I'll listen
to whatever I want.

390
00:29:39,880 --> 00:29:42,120
Sorry, excuse me for a moment again.

391
00:29:50,520 --> 00:29:52,520
Isn't her cacophony unbearable?

392
00:29:52,600 --> 00:29:55,520
Is it fair to poison me with this music
in the twenty-first century?

393
00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:59,920
Sorry, I have a lesson,
and this person just can't understand

394
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:02,040
how exactly we call the trash

395
00:30:02,120 --> 00:30:05,080
he's been listening to his entire life.

396
00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:08,120
Hi neighbor.
I didn't know you got married.

397
00:30:10,400 --> 00:30:12,480
No, no, no, old man, she's not my wife.

398
00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:14,600
I'm just the neighbor.

399
00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:15,760
Veronika.

400
00:30:17,160 --> 00:30:18,560
Castro?

401
00:30:21,200 --> 00:30:22,480
Kind of.

402
00:30:22,560 --> 00:30:25,680
- Hammer.
- What?

403
00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:27,480
Lend me a hammer.

404
00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:39,680
He gave Gordon a hammer.

405
00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:48,880
Finally, the electricity was turned on.

406
00:31:18,640 --> 00:31:21,120
Don't worry, we dressed up
all of your naked ladies.

407
00:31:21,200 --> 00:31:23,000
And we didn't have enough men

408
00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:26,000
so we found some in your box
over there and cut them out.

409
00:31:26,080 --> 00:31:27,600
Look how beautiful it is!

410
00:31:28,680 --> 00:31:30,080
You cut them out, you say?

411
00:31:30,160 --> 00:31:31,800
We didn't just cut them out,

412
00:31:31,880 --> 00:31:34,960
we also played "border guards"
and put visas in your passport.

413
00:31:35,040 --> 00:31:36,000
Here.

414
00:31:42,440 --> 00:31:44,440
Oh, you damned kids!

415
00:31:45,520 --> 00:31:48,920
I'm going to give you
visa-free travel right now.

416
00:31:49,960 --> 00:31:54,560
Illegal immigrants!
I'm going to deport you.

417
00:31:54,640 --> 00:31:56,960
So, she tells me,
"You're going to be my first."

418
00:31:57,040 --> 00:31:59,400
And I say, "Aha,
if you count from the end."

419
00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:09,960
Interesting, what's with our bachelor?

420
00:32:10,040 --> 00:32:12,120
Has he given her a red rose?

421
00:32:13,440 --> 00:32:16,920
- What?
- Well, has he banged her or not?

422
00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:20,520
I'll bang you so hard
that your muzzle falls off.

423
00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:22,920
Choose your words carefully,
she's my sister.

424
00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:24,960
Artilleryman.

425
00:32:32,880 --> 00:32:34,200
Guys!

426
00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:38,880
Family life has really
flattened you out, yeah?

427
00:32:43,680 --> 00:32:46,800
Right, don't confuse me with Oleh.

428
00:32:46,880 --> 00:32:49,400
He's a pussy whipped family man,

429
00:32:49,480 --> 00:32:51,480
while I am a free wolf in my own home.

430
00:32:51,560 --> 00:32:52,720
Welcome.

431
00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:56,200
Come on, come on.

432
00:32:58,000 --> 00:33:01,400
- Hello.
- Oh, sister, hello.

433
00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:05,000
How are you getting along
with this goblin, is he offending you?

434
00:33:05,080 --> 00:33:07,720
No way, brother, your friend is pure gold.

435
00:33:07,800 --> 00:33:12,520
He's so responsive, with good taste
and the kids adore him.

436
00:33:13,400 --> 00:33:16,440
They're not kids. They're angels!

437
00:33:17,840 --> 00:33:20,400
Are you sure that you'll put them to bed
so that I won't worry?

438
00:33:20,480 --> 00:33:22,320
Yes, everything is under control.

439
00:33:22,400 --> 00:33:23,480
Uncle Oleh will handle everything.

440
00:33:24,800 --> 00:33:27,080
Hello, by the way. Have a good evening.

441
00:33:28,120 --> 00:33:29,080
Good luck.

442
00:33:30,560 --> 00:33:33,080
The sister is pretty sexy.

443
00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:36,080
Right, shut up.

444
00:33:39,320 --> 00:33:40,320
Never mind that, guys,

445
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:43,160
you're about to meet
her full demonic luggage.

446
00:33:45,680 --> 00:33:47,480
Good evening, dear gentlemen.

447
00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:52,040
Hey, little ones.

448
00:33:52,120 --> 00:33:54,120
Does she beat them hard?

449
00:33:54,200 --> 00:33:57,040
Kids, these goodies are for you.

450
00:33:58,640 --> 00:34:00,360
No, no. Thank you.

451
00:34:00,440 --> 00:34:05,120
Factory-produced sweets contain trans fats
that can cause cancer.

452
00:34:07,520 --> 00:34:10,920
She not only beats them,
she also starves them.

453
00:34:12,120 --> 00:34:13,520
Poor kids!

454
00:34:16,199 --> 00:34:18,400
Come on, come on!

455
00:34:18,480 --> 00:34:21,920
- He scored!
- He scored!

456
00:34:42,800 --> 00:34:46,320
Look, they want some,
but their mother forbids it.

457
00:34:46,400 --> 00:34:52,159
Here's a tip: don't eat yellow snow.

458
00:34:55,159 --> 00:34:56,600
What are you looking at?

459
00:34:56,679 --> 00:34:59,640
Actually, we are
waiting for the first signs

460
00:34:59,720 --> 00:35:03,320
of metabolic disorders,
obesity and heart attacks.

461
00:35:06,200 --> 00:35:07,920
Oh, it already started.

462
00:35:10,000 --> 00:35:11,280
Quiet!

463
00:35:14,440 --> 00:35:18,320
Yes, kitten. Nothing,
just watching football.

464
00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:21,600
Henpecked!

465
00:35:24,880 --> 00:35:29,200
Tell him, "Hey, junior."
And he'll say, "What?"

466
00:35:29,280 --> 00:35:30,680
And you say, "That's what!"

467
00:35:31,840 --> 00:35:32,760
Hey, junior!

468
00:35:32,840 --> 00:35:34,160
Yes, sir.

469
00:35:37,080 --> 00:35:38,400
Damn.

470
00:35:39,680 --> 00:35:42,760
Oh, say "rascal".

471
00:35:43,600 --> 00:35:44,560
Rascal?

472
00:35:44,640 --> 00:35:46,600
Your father is a "Maskal".

473
00:35:49,200 --> 00:35:51,840
Not a "Maskal" but a Moskal.

474
00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:53,720
You should read Taras Shevchenko.

475
00:35:53,800 --> 00:35:56,720
Listen, your niece and nephew aren't bad,

476
00:35:56,800 --> 00:35:59,200
they're quite smart, real wonderkids.

477
00:35:59,280 --> 00:36:02,440
You also used to be smart at school,
but look what's become of you!

478
00:36:05,600 --> 00:36:07,160
That's how it is, kids.

479
00:36:07,240 --> 00:36:08,840
Oh, it's nine p.m.,

480
00:36:08,920 --> 00:36:09,960
the kids have to sleep.

481
00:36:10,040 --> 00:36:11,880
Will you tell me a bedtime story?

482
00:36:19,560 --> 00:36:20,880
All clear.

483
00:36:21,800 --> 00:36:24,640
You kids were amazing tonight.

484
00:36:25,120 --> 00:36:29,040
Okay, special agents, give me a report
on how things are going.

485
00:36:29,120 --> 00:36:30,600
Everything goes according to the plan.

486
00:36:30,680 --> 00:36:31,840
We poured his colognes down the sink,

487
00:36:31,920 --> 00:36:34,040
ruined his passport so he wouldn't flee,

488
00:36:34,120 --> 00:36:36,280
threw a water balloon
at him off the balcony.

489
00:36:36,360 --> 00:36:39,080
Found his dollars in a hiding place
and destroyed them.

490
00:36:39,160 --> 00:36:40,480
Oh wow, how much?

491
00:36:40,560 --> 00:36:43,480
A few thousand. That was my initiative.

492
00:36:43,560 --> 00:36:45,640
Fantastic, right on!

493
00:36:45,720 --> 00:36:48,720
The plan to save planet Earth
from the mutant is in good hands.

494
00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:52,120
- Everything for humanity.
- Exactly, for humanity.

495
00:36:52,200 --> 00:36:54,640
Uncle Oleh, are you sure he's a mutant?

496
00:36:54,720 --> 00:36:56,440
He seems to be a normal man.

497
00:36:57,080 --> 00:37:00,240
Are you kidding,
he's pretending to be normal,

498
00:37:00,320 --> 00:37:02,520
but he really is a mutant.

499
00:37:02,600 --> 00:37:05,120
I've got additional weapons for you,

500
00:37:05,200 --> 00:37:07,880
secret stuff, new generation.

501
00:37:09,720 --> 00:37:12,320
Hide it until the time is right.

502
00:37:12,400 --> 00:37:13,920
And now sleep, sleep, sleep.

503
00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:19,960
Are we really going to get gifts
at the end of our mission?

504
00:37:20,040 --> 00:37:24,920
You bet! Eternal glory and the best gifts,
just as we agreed.

505
00:37:34,040 --> 00:37:36,520
Petro, we're off to school. Bye.

506
00:37:37,000 --> 00:37:40,240
Goodbye, uncle Petro.

507
00:37:40,320 --> 00:37:42,040
Have a nice day.

508
00:37:44,600 --> 00:37:46,280
Yes.

509
00:37:48,760 --> 00:37:50,400
Damn beer.

510
00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:07,480
Eat worms!

511
00:38:08,680 --> 00:38:11,040
You little bastards!

512
00:38:11,120 --> 00:38:14,800
May a dog lick your lips, goddamn!

513
00:38:38,560 --> 00:38:39,600
Greetings.

514
00:38:40,280 --> 00:38:44,000
Petro, what is that?
Some sort of beauty procedures?

515
00:38:44,080 --> 00:38:46,800
How much does it cost
and when does the effect disappear?

516
00:38:46,880 --> 00:38:48,840
Our machoman found himself
a tattoo master.

517
00:38:48,920 --> 00:38:51,360
And I see pigs are the trend now.

518
00:38:51,440 --> 00:38:53,800
This belly of yours is a pig trend.

519
00:38:53,880 --> 00:38:55,840
You're a bit aggressive, Pete,

520
00:38:55,920 --> 00:38:57,800
are they not feeding you well at home?

521
00:38:57,880 --> 00:38:59,720
Everything is fine at home.

522
00:39:00,600 --> 00:39:02,240
- Got it. The neighbor.
- She.

523
00:39:02,320 --> 00:39:03,400
She really annoys you?

524
00:39:03,480 --> 00:39:06,800
Nobody annoys me. Everything is fine.

525
00:39:06,880 --> 00:39:09,880
Easy, easy, Petro. Breath. Relax.

526
00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:12,400
I am calm! Like a Shaolin Monk.

527
00:39:12,480 --> 00:39:14,560
Let's just play. In silence.

528
00:39:15,680 --> 00:39:17,480
Play, Petro, play.

529
00:39:23,320 --> 00:39:25,120
Looks like little Pete isn't having fun.

530
00:39:25,200 --> 00:39:27,480
Maybe I should rent out
Veronika and her kids?

531
00:39:27,560 --> 00:39:29,720
So that they take care
of my neighbor at the cottage.

532
00:39:29,800 --> 00:39:33,040
Total asshole but he has
a really nice piece of real estate.

533
00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:36,960
Poor Petro, he really needs help.

534
00:39:37,040 --> 00:39:38,840
So let him speak with my Violetta.

535
00:39:38,920 --> 00:39:41,720
Why else did I pay for her
Instagram psychologist courses?

536
00:39:43,920 --> 00:39:48,600
Yeah, all the hot chicks used to want
to become models and TV anchorwomen,

537
00:39:48,680 --> 00:39:51,760
now they want to become
coaches and shrinks.

538
00:39:53,840 --> 00:39:55,680
Psychologist.

539
00:39:56,720 --> 00:40:00,440
Have you ever had someone
hit you on the head with a condom?

540
00:40:01,600 --> 00:40:02,720
Well, uh...

541
00:40:02,800 --> 00:40:04,920
How about gluing a pig to your face?

542
00:40:05,000 --> 00:40:06,040
No, it never happened.

543
00:40:06,120 --> 00:40:10,040
They came, seized my territory,
annexed half of my apartment

544
00:40:10,120 --> 00:40:11,720
and now even the water disappeared.

545
00:40:11,800 --> 00:40:14,000
You want to talk about it.

546
00:40:14,080 --> 00:40:17,040
Destroyed my bucks, ruined my passport

547
00:40:17,120 --> 00:40:18,800
and in front of their mother they say,

548
00:40:18,880 --> 00:40:20,560
"Gee, that's not us, we weren't there."

549
00:40:20,640 --> 00:40:22,520
Damned little green men!

550
00:40:24,200 --> 00:40:25,520
I understand everything.

551
00:40:25,600 --> 00:40:27,560
You're emotionally drained.

552
00:40:28,400 --> 00:40:31,600
And what does your inner child
tell you about this?

553
00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:34,800
My inner child
is bloody well silent right now

554
00:40:34,880 --> 00:40:38,360
and kicking the asses of those devils.

555
00:40:38,440 --> 00:40:39,880
Who the hell is it?

556
00:40:44,280 --> 00:40:47,960
And now, joining my inner child,
is my outer mother!

557
00:40:48,560 --> 00:40:49,800
Your mother, is it that bad?

558
00:40:49,880 --> 00:40:51,920
Of course, my mother is bad,

559
00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:54,040
because her hobby is driving people crazy.

560
00:40:54,120 --> 00:40:56,000
She can run anyone out of this world.

561
00:40:57,080 --> 00:40:59,440
She can run anyone out of this world?

562
00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:03,960
Mother, mother, that's good.

563
00:41:05,120 --> 00:41:08,920
Hello, mommy, I am
so desperately waiting for you!

564
00:41:13,400 --> 00:41:14,320
Would you like some borsch?

565
00:41:15,680 --> 00:41:16,880
Have you already tried it?

566
00:41:17,800 --> 00:41:19,000
- Don't be afraid.
- Yeah.

567
00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:23,720
Listen, Petro, I have
a little proposition.

568
00:41:24,280 --> 00:41:25,400
Yes.

569
00:41:25,480 --> 00:41:30,800
The day after tomorrow, the children have
a concert at school, a talent contest,

570
00:41:31,320 --> 00:41:33,560
but unfortunately
I have my final interview

571
00:41:33,640 --> 00:41:35,040
at the choir at the same time.

572
00:41:35,120 --> 00:41:39,560
And it's so important that
there's no way I can change it.

573
00:41:39,640 --> 00:41:40,600
Yes, yes, yes.

574
00:41:40,680 --> 00:41:43,280
We definitely won't be able
to make it to the concert.

575
00:41:43,920 --> 00:41:49,440
I wanted to ask for your help,
to drive the kids there, please.

576
00:41:49,520 --> 00:41:51,480
I'll arrive a little bit later.

577
00:41:52,000 --> 00:41:53,640
The borsch tastes just like my mom's.

578
00:41:54,440 --> 00:41:56,200
Thanks for the compliment.

579
00:41:56,280 --> 00:41:57,520
By the way, speaking of my mom,

580
00:41:59,200 --> 00:42:00,840
she is coming tomorrow.

581
00:42:01,440 --> 00:42:02,240
Your mother?

582
00:42:03,200 --> 00:42:05,520
Madame Vasilina,
who half the town was scared of?

583
00:42:05,600 --> 00:42:06,920
Exactly!

584
00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:10,880
So, okay, I'll cover you
with your little brats, if you wish,

585
00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:14,080
and drive them to school
but there is one "but":

586
00:42:14,160 --> 00:42:15,680
would you cover me for my mother?

587
00:42:15,760 --> 00:42:18,720
She and everyone
in Chortkiv are annoying me

588
00:42:18,800 --> 00:42:20,320
asking why I'm still not married.

589
00:42:20,400 --> 00:42:24,120
Even a priest visited me asking whether
I'm not one of those "interesting" people.

590
00:42:24,800 --> 00:42:26,800
So, if I understood you correctly,

591
00:42:26,880 --> 00:42:29,560
you want me to pretend
to be your girlfriend?

592
00:42:29,640 --> 00:42:32,240
Not my girlfriend, but my wife.

593
00:42:32,320 --> 00:42:34,240
And not to pretend but to be
convincing, so that my mother

594
00:42:34,320 --> 00:42:38,200
and her congregation will leave me alone.

595
00:42:38,280 --> 00:42:40,640
Do we have a deal?

596
00:42:44,400 --> 00:42:47,920
OK, it's a deal,
but you're driving my kids to the contest.

597
00:42:48,000 --> 00:42:50,280
Of course. Are you sure
you want me to bring them back?

598
00:43:13,280 --> 00:43:16,640
See! We got here in two
and a half hours, loser.

599
00:43:16,720 --> 00:43:19,040
With you driving we would have been
crawling around

600
00:43:19,120 --> 00:43:20,800
for a year, like a pregnant turtle!

601
00:43:22,080 --> 00:43:23,400
Here's a tip.

602
00:43:23,480 --> 00:43:27,000
How long can I do everyone's job?!

603
00:43:33,200 --> 00:43:38,600
Oh, right, and take
your jukebox and remember:

604
00:43:39,600 --> 00:43:44,440
if I said the music is bad, it's bad.

605
00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:48,080
I have to do everything
by myself! By myself!

606
00:43:53,320 --> 00:43:55,320
That's it. She's gone!

607
00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:03,520
- Thank God, she's gone!
- Let's go.

608
00:44:11,080 --> 00:44:12,080
Mom!

609
00:44:12,160 --> 00:44:15,320
Pete, my dearest son, Pete!

610
00:44:16,280 --> 00:44:17,520
Pete!

611
00:44:20,080 --> 00:44:24,280
Oh, Petro, why are you so skinny?

612
00:44:25,160 --> 00:44:26,120
Don't you eat anything?

613
00:44:26,680 --> 00:44:30,320
Are you on a diet? My dear! How shameful!

614
00:44:30,400 --> 00:44:34,400
There was this one guy who was always
on a diet, he died. He was so light

615
00:44:34,480 --> 00:44:38,000
that he only needed two people
to carry his casket to the grave.

616
00:44:38,080 --> 00:44:42,240
You must get married
so that your wife cooks dumplings for you.

617
00:44:42,320 --> 00:44:45,360
Mom, I'm so happy to see you.

618
00:44:45,440 --> 00:44:46,720
Let me take your bag.

619
00:44:46,800 --> 00:44:48,040
What's this?

620
00:44:49,240 --> 00:44:53,040
What, am I not capable
of lifting my own bag?

621
00:44:53,880 --> 00:44:58,400
Your mother is so old she can't lift
her own bag any longer.

622
00:44:58,480 --> 00:45:02,560
Mother is old,
mother is disabled, it's over.

623
00:45:02,640 --> 00:45:06,680
I understand, the years go by
like the dumb people go to court.

624
00:45:06,760 --> 00:45:07,800
Mother.

625
00:45:07,880 --> 00:45:12,200
Don't "mother" me! And now
mother is old and stupid.

626
00:45:12,280 --> 00:45:14,040
Mother, you're not stupid.

627
00:45:16,000 --> 00:45:17,240
Well, of course, I'm not stupid.

628
00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:23,520
Son, look what mother has done for you.
I think about you with my soul.

629
00:45:24,680 --> 00:45:26,240
Look, what a fine girl,

630
00:45:26,320 --> 00:45:28,400
and a real mother goose.

631
00:45:28,480 --> 00:45:32,640
She'll give birth to three kids
as easy as spitting them out.

632
00:45:34,680 --> 00:45:38,880
Or this one. Look, it's Mike's daughter.
Mike who lives across the river.

633
00:45:38,960 --> 00:45:41,520
Don't make faces.
I know she's not the best,

634
00:45:41,600 --> 00:45:44,840
but Mike's the mayor for now and later.

635
00:45:44,920 --> 00:45:49,360
This one made her own career,
head of the customs department.

636
00:45:49,440 --> 00:45:52,560
Yes, a bit old at 26 years of age,

637
00:45:52,640 --> 00:45:55,480
but the head of the customs department!

638
00:45:57,720 --> 00:46:00,040
Good morning, Madame Vasilina.

639
00:46:01,520 --> 00:46:03,920
Eternal glory to God!

640
00:46:05,880 --> 00:46:08,400
Mother, this is Veronika.

641
00:46:14,280 --> 00:46:16,280
Where does she know me from?

642
00:46:16,360 --> 00:46:19,440
From childhood. I'm Oleh
Pavliv's sister. Do you remember?

643
00:46:20,840 --> 00:46:22,200
Daughter!

644
00:46:23,720 --> 00:46:25,640
All the best to you!

645
00:46:26,520 --> 00:46:29,520
I got scared. I thought
you were a tax inspector.

646
00:46:30,920 --> 00:46:36,800
Daughter, how you've grown,
you lost weight, you look good.

647
00:46:37,920 --> 00:46:39,560
What brings you here?

648
00:46:39,640 --> 00:46:41,120
Because in Chortkiv we thought
that you are like

649
00:46:41,200 --> 00:46:43,800
all the other normal people
and went to Poland to get a job.

650
00:46:49,800 --> 00:46:53,720
And what are you, Veronika,

651
00:46:54,880 --> 00:46:58,520
Oleh Pavliv's sister,

652
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:04,480
doing in my son's house
at such an early hour?

653
00:47:10,480 --> 00:47:13,640
What, are you both living together,

654
00:47:15,120 --> 00:47:18,920
like husband and wife,

655
00:47:20,160 --> 00:47:21,320
in sin!

656
00:47:24,520 --> 00:47:27,480
I'll make coffee for everyone, okay?

657
00:47:27,560 --> 00:47:29,800
I like mine with cognac.

658
00:47:34,400 --> 00:47:37,080
- Good morning.
- Good morning.

659
00:47:37,160 --> 00:47:39,000
And Valerian drops...

660
00:47:39,080 --> 00:47:41,400
Don't tell me that these are
my grandchildren!

661
00:47:41,480 --> 00:47:47,400
Madame Vasalina, please meet
my kids from my first marriage.

662
00:47:47,480 --> 00:47:49,000
Only from the first?

663
00:47:49,080 --> 00:47:51,960
I hope you don't have any more
from your other marriages?

664
00:47:52,040 --> 00:47:54,160
- I'm Marta.
- I'm Marko.

665
00:47:54,240 --> 00:47:58,600
Just don't tell me that Sashko, Demko
and Levko are going to jump out at me?

666
00:47:58,680 --> 00:48:02,320
OK, kids, you've met and that's enough.
Now it's time to go.

667
00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:08,840
We've got our morning ritual.
Let's go before it gets too hot out!

668
00:48:08,920 --> 00:48:09,880
Where are you going?

669
00:48:10,520 --> 00:48:13,120
As always, to the playground.

670
00:48:13,200 --> 00:48:15,240
Our morning workout is our everything.

671
00:48:17,240 --> 00:48:19,720
Let's go, let's go.
It'll be fun. Tell them.

672
00:48:23,240 --> 00:48:24,600
He's so...

673
00:48:26,520 --> 00:48:27,600
caring.

674
00:48:37,960 --> 00:48:41,320
What's that? A cemetery for dirty plates?

675
00:48:41,840 --> 00:48:43,520
It's a dishwasher.

676
00:48:44,160 --> 00:48:45,800
Dishwasher?

677
00:48:46,920 --> 00:48:51,920
We can't wash anything with our
tender little hands anymore, can we?

678
00:48:52,000 --> 00:48:55,480
Just trying to waste Petro's electricity!

679
00:49:08,800 --> 00:49:10,920
Come on demons, go crazy.

680
00:49:16,360 --> 00:49:17,200
Got it.

681
00:49:43,880 --> 00:49:48,000
Hello, why are you sitting there
like grannies in the park?

682
00:49:48,640 --> 00:49:50,240
What else are we supposed to do here?

683
00:49:51,880 --> 00:49:52,920
Play.

684
00:49:53,680 --> 00:49:56,320
Play with what? It's boring here.

685
00:49:57,120 --> 00:49:58,560
You two are boring. You're outside.

686
00:49:59,320 --> 00:50:00,840
You're outside.

687
00:50:00,920 --> 00:50:04,320
When I was a kid,
we would beat poison ivy with a stick

688
00:50:04,400 --> 00:50:06,320
and it was so much fun.
But you guys have these

689
00:50:06,400 --> 00:50:08,880
fantastic carousels! So, come on!

690
00:50:08,960 --> 00:50:11,440
They're just metal bars.
What's so fun about them?

691
00:50:12,480 --> 00:50:15,400
You're really quite something,
the Instagram generation.

692
00:50:15,480 --> 00:50:18,240
Tik-Tok. Instagram
is for the elder people.

693
00:50:18,320 --> 00:50:19,480
Elder?

694
00:50:20,080 --> 00:50:21,080
Elder?

695
00:50:21,720 --> 00:50:23,200
I'll show you elder people.

696
00:50:25,920 --> 00:50:27,520
Look here,

697
00:50:28,200 --> 00:50:32,240
these are called homemade
cutlets, Petro loves them.

698
00:50:33,000 --> 00:50:35,360
Real homemade pies.

699
00:50:35,440 --> 00:50:38,760
You can smell the aroma of the dough.

700
00:50:38,840 --> 00:50:40,600
Homemade potato pancakes.

701
00:50:41,160 --> 00:50:42,880
A wife should be able to cook them.

702
00:50:42,960 --> 00:50:46,560
Cabbage rolls. Every wife
must know how to make them.

703
00:50:46,640 --> 00:50:49,240
Pigs ears the way Petro likes them.

704
00:50:49,320 --> 00:50:51,480
Smell the aroma!

705
00:50:53,200 --> 00:50:57,680
I can see that with a homemaker like you
my child is going to waste away.

706
00:50:58,480 --> 00:51:00,880
Let me see what's going on in your fridge.

707
00:51:03,840 --> 00:51:09,400
Sweet Jesus, save my child from an ulcer.

708
00:51:10,240 --> 00:51:12,520
What kind of a clown's cap is this?

709
00:51:12,600 --> 00:51:15,760
It's a Moroccan dish - Chicken Tajine.

710
00:51:15,840 --> 00:51:17,840
What, you have a Tajik
cooking chicken for you?

711
00:51:17,920 --> 00:51:19,200
No, I cook it myself.

712
00:51:28,800 --> 00:51:32,120
And this, what is it?

713
00:51:32,200 --> 00:51:34,640
This is Chia seed pudding.

714
00:51:34,720 --> 00:51:39,600
You can feed the chicken
with your seeds but not my son!

715
00:51:39,680 --> 00:51:43,520
I don't seem to remember you asking
for my permission to empty the fridge.

716
00:51:43,600 --> 00:51:45,520
My dear mother,

717
00:51:45,600 --> 00:51:48,120
as if I'm going to ask you
about that fridge.

718
00:51:51,280 --> 00:51:57,440
You can feed rabbits with this grass,
but not my only child!

719
00:51:57,520 --> 00:51:58,800
Because from this kind of food

720
00:51:58,880 --> 00:52:02,320
Pete will have grass
growing out of his rear end.

721
00:52:03,000 --> 00:52:05,080
Here's is your salad,

722
00:52:05,160 --> 00:52:08,040
chia, and your Tajiks!

723
00:52:08,120 --> 00:52:11,640
Lord, this is healthy food

724
00:52:11,720 --> 00:52:15,480
and not your fried fat stuffed with fat.

725
00:52:15,560 --> 00:52:20,040
You bandit! You came here
with your luggage

726
00:52:20,120 --> 00:52:23,040
and you're cooking up
spells against my child.

727
00:52:23,120 --> 00:52:25,720
I have not cooked up
spells against your child!

728
00:52:26,360 --> 00:52:29,200
You're a mother of fatherless orphans!

729
00:52:30,880 --> 00:52:34,280
You also raised your son without a father.

730
00:52:39,640 --> 00:52:41,040
Look and learn, little guy.

731
00:52:53,440 --> 00:52:54,800
Some woman is very lucky.

732
00:52:54,880 --> 00:52:57,280
My husband would only
hang out with the kids at gunpoint.

733
00:52:58,080 --> 00:52:59,560
At least you have someone.

734
00:52:59,640 --> 00:53:02,160
That dad is really sexy, of course.

735
00:53:04,080 --> 00:53:05,800
He's definitely a mutant.

736
00:53:05,880 --> 00:53:08,680
A real person could never do that.

737
00:53:08,760 --> 00:53:10,880
What do you think? Where is he from?

738
00:53:10,960 --> 00:53:12,520
Mom says he's from a car repair garage.

739
00:53:14,680 --> 00:53:15,920
How about that, junior?

740
00:53:16,000 --> 00:53:18,440
One month of training,
and you can do it too.

741
00:53:18,520 --> 00:53:20,120
What for?

742
00:53:20,880 --> 00:53:21,960
Well,

743
00:53:22,040 --> 00:53:23,680
you'll pump up your biceps
and all the girls

744
00:53:24,320 --> 00:53:27,880
in the neighborhood will
go crazy over you, a brutal macho.

745
00:53:27,960 --> 00:53:30,200
But who is a brutal macho?

746
00:53:30,760 --> 00:53:32,920
That's you in a month.

747
00:53:33,000 --> 00:53:35,120
I don't want to be a stupid body builder.

748
00:53:35,200 --> 00:53:38,040
You would rather be a boring geek, right?

749
00:53:38,920 --> 00:53:40,720
Remember what uncle Petro tells you,

750
00:53:40,800 --> 00:53:44,000
women like the strong and handsome men.

751
00:53:44,080 --> 00:53:46,840
But mother says that a real man must be

752
00:53:46,920 --> 00:53:48,840
gentle and responsible.

753
00:53:49,720 --> 00:53:52,840
That's why she's divorced.

754
00:53:53,920 --> 00:53:56,000
Junior, remember this:

755
00:53:56,080 --> 00:54:00,360
a real man owes nothing to no one.

756
00:54:02,400 --> 00:54:09,280
<i>- He does not know grief...
- He does not know grief...</i>

757
00:54:23,080 --> 00:54:27,240
There aren't any normal men left,
it's such a crisis of masculinity!

758
00:54:27,320 --> 00:54:30,960
No, no, no. Your Petro is not like that.

759
00:54:31,040 --> 00:54:33,920
Yes. Not like that.
And who raised him like that?

760
00:54:34,000 --> 00:54:36,560
Who exactly raised him like that?!

761
00:54:36,640 --> 00:54:40,680
Who if not you,
Madame Vasalina, who if not you?

762
00:54:41,680 --> 00:54:43,080
Let's drink to that!

763
00:54:44,960 --> 00:54:48,400
Listen, why do you keep
calling me "Madame"?

764
00:54:49,320 --> 00:54:51,280
What "Madame" am I to you?

765
00:54:52,320 --> 00:54:55,000
Call me... mother.

766
00:54:56,920 --> 00:54:58,120
Let's drink to that, mother.

767
00:55:00,800 --> 00:55:02,960
My sweet daughter.

768
00:55:15,120 --> 00:55:18,840
So that's how mommy helped
to get her out of my home.

769
00:55:19,560 --> 00:55:20,840
What, what?

770
00:55:21,360 --> 00:55:22,760
Chew your food properly.

771
00:55:22,840 --> 00:55:27,440
- I said, you should eat when you drink.
- What?

772
00:55:27,520 --> 00:55:30,800
Hey, why are you yelling at your wife?

773
00:55:32,000 --> 00:55:34,360
Well, look, my sweet children,

774
00:55:35,920 --> 00:55:41,680
I'm leaving you.
I'm catching a flight to Turkey today,

775
00:55:41,760 --> 00:55:43,200
an all-inclusive.

776
00:55:43,880 --> 00:55:46,960
I'll drive the animators crazy.

777
00:55:48,720 --> 00:55:50,440
Oh, my heavy sins.

778
00:55:52,880 --> 00:55:57,840
Petro, give her some
pickle juice in the morning.

779
00:55:59,160 --> 00:56:01,200
And you have some tomatoes.

780
00:56:01,720 --> 00:56:04,720
Exactly the kind you like, sonny.

781
00:56:04,800 --> 00:56:05,920
Bye.

782
00:56:21,520 --> 00:56:25,520
Don't worry, I'll clean everything up.

783
00:57:27,040 --> 00:57:30,240
Damn, why are you silent like a partisan?

784
00:57:30,320 --> 00:57:31,560
School!

785
00:57:33,800 --> 00:57:36,000
Little ones, we overslept, let's fly.

786
00:57:36,080 --> 00:57:38,160
You overslept, so you fly.

787
00:57:38,240 --> 00:57:40,400
I said, hurry up.

788
00:57:43,680 --> 00:57:45,920
Why do you scatter it everywhere?

789
00:57:46,000 --> 00:57:48,320
Your mom left you cucumber outfits,

790
00:57:49,040 --> 00:57:52,000
so put them on,
little green men, hurry up!

791
00:57:52,080 --> 00:57:54,160
I'm not going to wear
this idiotic costume.

792
00:57:54,240 --> 00:57:55,920
It degrades my human dignity.

793
00:58:00,040 --> 00:58:02,400
Little ones, why are you
dressed as cucumbers?

794
00:58:03,840 --> 00:58:05,640
Your cheeks are as red as beets

795
00:58:05,720 --> 00:58:07,400
and your noses are like carrots.

796
00:58:08,920 --> 00:58:11,000
What's going on at your school?
Are you making a vegetable stew?

797
00:58:12,280 --> 00:58:14,160
Uncle Petro, stop making fun of us,

798
00:58:14,240 --> 00:58:16,400
these costumes already make us nauseous.

799
00:58:17,240 --> 00:58:21,520
Let us begin our yearly school-wide
amateur talent competition

800
00:58:21,600 --> 00:58:24,000
"Your talent, our school".

801
00:58:25,880 --> 00:58:26,720
Louder.

802
00:58:27,800 --> 00:58:31,480
And we have guests from the District
Administration here today.

803
00:58:33,040 --> 00:58:37,280
Please welcome on the stage class 2-A,

804
00:58:37,360 --> 00:58:40,400
"The dance of the little swans".

805
00:59:13,520 --> 00:59:14,800
I feel sick.

806
00:59:17,200 --> 00:59:18,440
I understand.

807
00:59:18,520 --> 00:59:20,600
School used to make me sick as well.

808
00:59:22,080 --> 00:59:24,440
And our concert is gaining momentum.

809
00:59:24,520 --> 00:59:27,040
I hope you like everything?

810
00:59:27,120 --> 00:59:29,520
Mykola Viktorovych, I'm talking to you.

811
00:59:29,600 --> 00:59:34,240
Please welcome on stage, class 2-B

812
00:59:34,320 --> 00:59:37,840
performing "The pumpkin
walks in the garden".

813
00:59:40,600 --> 00:59:44,720
<i>The pumpkin walks in the garden
And he talks to his kind</i>

814
00:59:45,400 --> 00:59:48,680
<i>Are you alive, are you well
All the pumpkin's family?</i>

815
00:59:48,760 --> 00:59:53,000
<i>The yellow melon
The pumpkin's mistress, replied:</i>

816
00:59:53,080 --> 00:59:58,280
<i>Alive and well are all
The Pumpkin's family</i>

817
00:59:58,360 --> 01:00:02,480
<i>And the cucumbers replied
The Pumpkin's sons and daughters</i>

818
01:00:06,720 --> 01:00:08,120
Where are the cucumbers?

819
01:00:08,920 --> 01:00:10,920
Where are the cucumbers!

820
01:00:13,440 --> 01:00:17,680
Hey! Beauties, shall we race?

821
01:00:21,320 --> 01:00:22,440
What's in it for us?

822
01:00:24,280 --> 01:00:26,840
Let's put it this way: the winner,

823
01:00:26,920 --> 01:00:29,560
invites you out
for tasty cocktails tonight.

824
01:00:31,520 --> 01:00:32,400
Yeah?

825
01:00:41,400 --> 01:00:44,600
No, thanks.

826
01:00:45,720 --> 01:00:47,680
Sorry, dude.

827
01:00:49,600 --> 01:00:52,720
Where are those cucumbers?
They've let down the entire class.

828
01:00:52,800 --> 01:00:56,520
Had we known we would've given the role
to someone more responsible.

829
01:00:56,600 --> 01:00:59,240
What do you want?
Their mother is a divorcee.

830
01:00:59,320 --> 01:01:02,600
She's probably looking
for a new man and not after her kids.

831
01:01:02,680 --> 01:01:04,640
My God, what a disgrace.

832
01:01:04,720 --> 01:01:08,600
Please, stop worrying, Natalia Yuriyivna,
your blood pressure will rise.

833
01:01:20,280 --> 01:01:22,320
Cucumbers, what's up?

834
01:01:22,400 --> 01:01:23,480
Are you pickled? Hurry up!

835
01:01:24,480 --> 01:01:26,440
I'm telling you. It's a bad idea

836
01:01:26,520 --> 01:01:29,520
to come to this celebration
of tragedy and humiliation.

837
01:01:30,320 --> 01:01:32,200
And where have we been, dare I ask?

838
01:01:33,120 --> 01:01:36,680
Are you not ashamed to let down
your entire class like this?

839
01:01:37,920 --> 01:01:41,120
And now, the results of our talent contest

840
01:01:41,200 --> 01:01:45,360
from our honorable jury. Class 2-A.

841
01:01:45,440 --> 01:01:49,600
Seven, six, eight, five.

842
01:01:49,680 --> 01:01:52,160
Class 2-B.

843
01:01:53,640 --> 01:01:58,040
Three, three, three, two.

844
01:01:58,800 --> 01:02:03,120
Therefore, 26 versus 11.

845
01:02:03,840 --> 01:02:08,040
Congratulations
on the victory of class 2-A.

846
01:02:08,120 --> 01:02:11,520
Please, let's get the gifts on the stage.

847
01:02:12,880 --> 01:02:14,960
I didn't work
as an animal the entire weekend

848
01:02:15,040 --> 01:02:18,640
on these decorations and costumes

849
01:02:18,720 --> 01:02:22,040
just to lose because
of these fatherless orphans!

850
01:02:22,120 --> 01:02:24,160
- Tereshchenkos.
- Tereshchenkos.

851
01:02:24,240 --> 01:02:26,960
I feel that it would be fair to give

852
01:02:27,040 --> 01:02:30,600
both classes a grade of 20

853
01:02:30,680 --> 01:02:33,520
and not give
the Tereshchenko kids any rewards.

854
01:02:33,600 --> 01:02:36,640
Wait, wait, everything here
is honest and transparent.

855
01:02:36,720 --> 01:02:38,400
Everyone saw the grading.

856
01:02:38,480 --> 01:02:42,400
Wait, dear jury, please, please.

857
01:02:42,480 --> 01:02:45,720
What about a repeat
performance for class 2-B?

858
01:02:46,400 --> 01:02:49,440
Listen, even weightlifters
get a second chance.

859
01:02:50,280 --> 01:02:52,400
Please, let them perform one more time.

860
01:02:52,920 --> 01:02:54,840
I don't know about weightlifters.

861
01:02:54,920 --> 01:02:56,640
We are an educational institution.

862
01:02:57,320 --> 01:03:00,040
There are respectable people here,
and you are creating a ruckus.

863
01:03:00,120 --> 01:03:03,120
I demand a draw: 20 points to each team.

864
01:03:03,200 --> 01:03:06,720
But not for the Tereshchenkos
who were late and let everyone down.

865
01:03:06,800 --> 01:03:10,280
I'm sorry but who are you? A weightlifter?

866
01:03:11,800 --> 01:03:13,880
Don't shame our school
in front of the District...

867
01:03:13,960 --> 01:03:16,320
we can't hold up Mykola Vasylievych

868
01:03:16,400 --> 01:03:18,520
just because of some fatherless orphans!

869
01:03:22,120 --> 01:03:25,120
You're going to pay
for calling them fatherless orphans!

870
01:03:40,120 --> 01:03:42,600
Take this for cutting
my child's math grades!

871
01:04:05,160 --> 01:04:08,680
Let's go, let's go, little ones.
We're leaving, we're leaving.

872
01:04:08,760 --> 01:04:11,640
Mommy, mommy,
uncle Petro was so cool defending us!

873
01:04:11,720 --> 01:04:14,520
Did you see his right hook!?

874
01:04:14,600 --> 01:04:15,720
I saw it.

875
01:04:16,200 --> 01:04:18,040
But he was forced to use his hook,

876
01:04:18,120 --> 01:04:19,920
because you were late, right?

877
01:04:20,000 --> 01:04:22,080
Sorry. I'm remorseful.

878
01:04:22,680 --> 01:04:25,240
I'm just not used to waking up
to go to school anymore.

879
01:04:25,320 --> 01:04:28,760
But let's face it, this celebration
was just asking for a fight!

880
01:04:28,840 --> 01:04:31,720
It was the first time
we had fun at school!

881
01:04:31,800 --> 01:04:33,760
See, it was fun.

882
01:04:34,720 --> 01:04:39,440
So, hey, little ones, are we a gang now?

883
01:04:39,520 --> 01:04:40,760
Yes!

884
01:04:41,600 --> 01:04:43,360
Ok, let's go relieve our stress.

885
01:04:43,440 --> 01:04:47,320
But hey, no more vomiting
in the car, okay?

886
01:05:43,680 --> 01:05:44,520
Yes.

887
01:05:46,320 --> 01:05:48,440
Just don't tell me that the school called.

888
01:05:50,480 --> 01:05:54,160
I got my dream job in the best choir.

889
01:05:56,720 --> 01:05:59,560
Mommy, mommy, it's so tasty!

890
01:05:59,640 --> 01:06:01,960
- Give some to me.
- Here, try mine.

891
01:06:38,400 --> 01:06:40,440
Good night, uncle Petro.

892
01:06:40,520 --> 01:06:41,400
You're great.

893
01:06:41,920 --> 01:06:44,560
Yes, you're great,
even though you are a mutant.

894
01:06:44,640 --> 01:06:48,080
We don't want to save the planet from you.

895
01:06:48,160 --> 01:06:51,400
Maybe you'll think twice
before destroying humanity?

896
01:06:51,480 --> 01:06:52,280
What, what?

897
01:06:52,360 --> 01:06:55,600
We're tired of fighting you.

898
01:06:56,120 --> 01:06:58,800
I don't want any gifts from uncle Oleh.

899
01:07:02,120 --> 01:07:03,080
Wait,

900
01:07:03,720 --> 01:07:08,240
so all of your tricks
were actually uncle Oleh's ideas?

901
01:07:12,120 --> 01:07:15,080
The dollars, the passport,

902
01:07:16,200 --> 01:07:18,240
and the damned pig on my face?

903
01:07:18,320 --> 01:07:19,680
We were saving people on Earth.

904
01:07:19,760 --> 01:07:23,280
But we no longer believe
that you are dangerous.

905
01:07:26,520 --> 01:07:28,200
Good night, earthlings.

906
01:07:30,160 --> 01:07:32,480
The time has come for horrible truth.

907
01:07:37,320 --> 01:07:38,600
Veronika,

908
01:07:39,880 --> 01:07:43,200
I need to tell you something.

909
01:09:15,000 --> 01:09:17,399
I'll leave before the kids wake up.

910
01:09:17,880 --> 01:09:19,920
I need to make breakfast.

911
01:09:21,840 --> 01:09:22,880
Don't hurry,

912
01:09:27,720 --> 01:09:32,200
stay in bed for a while
and I'll go get some croissants.

913
01:09:33,840 --> 01:09:35,720
I know a great place.

914
01:10:33,000 --> 01:10:34,640
Did you forget your keys or something?

915
01:10:36,000 --> 01:10:37,440
No, not my keys.

916
01:10:37,960 --> 01:10:39,480
I forgot my choker.

917
01:10:40,080 --> 01:10:41,520
Cho... what?

918
01:10:42,040 --> 01:10:46,280
Ch, sh, yu, ya... choker.

919
01:10:46,360 --> 01:10:47,680
My decoration.

920
01:10:47,760 --> 01:10:49,360
Okay? We basically know each other.

921
01:11:06,200 --> 01:11:11,920
Oh, I've found my choker.

922
01:11:13,240 --> 01:11:15,440
Where's Petro? Is he still sleeping?

923
01:11:16,080 --> 01:11:18,520
No, he went to get some buns.

924
01:11:21,320 --> 01:11:25,120
You've got an idyllic family here.

925
01:11:29,200 --> 01:11:31,080
The bet really worked?

926
01:11:33,600 --> 01:11:34,520
What bet?

927
01:11:36,360 --> 01:11:38,080
Shake your mother.

928
01:11:38,160 --> 01:11:39,880
Do you people ever sleep!

929
01:11:41,800 --> 01:11:44,000
I've got unfed kids! Hello!

930
01:11:48,320 --> 01:11:50,720
Veronika, the croissants have arrived.

931
01:12:09,080 --> 01:12:10,120
Veronika!

932
01:12:12,640 --> 01:12:13,680
Kids!

933
01:12:30,360 --> 01:12:31,920
IT WAS A MISTAKE

934
01:13:20,400 --> 01:13:23,680
You finally woke up?
Because we're tired of tanning.

935
01:13:23,760 --> 01:13:25,160
What?

936
01:13:25,240 --> 01:13:28,160
Why is our Peter Pan so unhappy?

937
01:13:28,240 --> 01:13:29,720
Well, don't worry, don't worry,

938
01:13:29,800 --> 01:13:32,440
I'm ready to accept your capitulation.

939
01:13:33,120 --> 01:13:34,080
Good luck with the scrub.

940
01:13:34,160 --> 01:13:36,120
It looks like you've lost, Oleh.

941
01:13:36,200 --> 01:13:38,320
Aha, as if I'm going to believe you.

942
01:13:38,400 --> 01:13:39,760
Don't forget to wash the Porsche.

943
01:13:39,840 --> 01:13:43,880
I won't forget to wash my feet
before getting your priceless pedicure.

944
01:13:43,960 --> 01:13:45,520
That's quite the turnaround.

945
01:13:45,600 --> 01:13:47,680
How's that? The month is not over yet.

946
01:13:47,760 --> 01:13:48,800
Somehow like that.

947
01:13:49,640 --> 01:13:51,760
She disappeared
with the kids and their things.

948
01:13:51,840 --> 01:13:55,160
Look, empty. An empty till.

949
01:13:55,240 --> 01:13:57,200
That's strange.
Where did she disappear to?

950
01:13:57,280 --> 01:13:59,280
I have no idea,

951
01:13:59,360 --> 01:14:02,120
but the fact is that she
is no longer under my roof,

952
01:14:02,800 --> 01:14:03,880
therefore, Oleh, you lose.

953
01:14:04,560 --> 01:14:09,760
An unexpected turn in our bet,
she left and has not returned.

954
01:14:09,840 --> 01:14:12,640
A 100% win for Petro.

955
01:14:12,720 --> 01:14:14,400
It's not that he "couldn't", but she.

956
01:14:14,480 --> 01:14:16,360
Therefore, a technical,

957
01:14:16,440 --> 01:14:19,800
but still a defeat
for Oleh the Pedicure Guy.

958
01:14:19,880 --> 01:14:21,200
Do you have anything to say?

959
01:14:21,880 --> 01:14:25,360
It now looks like it's not
Peter Pan, but rather Oleh Pan.

960
01:14:27,120 --> 01:14:29,960
Petro, wait for us,
we'll bring the whiskey

961
01:14:30,040 --> 01:14:31,760
and Oleh will bring the cream.

962
01:15:52,880 --> 01:15:57,200
Well, I don't remember
Veronika ever not answering me.

963
01:15:57,280 --> 01:15:58,920
Where could she have gone?

964
01:15:59,920 --> 01:16:01,440
No,

965
01:16:01,520 --> 01:16:03,840
there's no way she would
have returned to that jerk.

966
01:16:03,920 --> 01:16:06,200
It's okay, Oleh, accept defeat.

967
01:16:06,280 --> 01:16:08,320
You'll soften Petro's feet
a bit and basically,

968
01:16:08,400 --> 01:16:12,080
after a month of practice,
you'll have learned a new profession.

969
01:16:12,160 --> 01:16:14,080
Being a "pedicurist" sounds proud.

970
01:16:14,160 --> 01:16:16,240
Right, calm down, I haven't lost yet.

971
01:16:16,320 --> 01:16:18,800
I'm 100% sure that Petro chased her. 100%.

972
01:16:18,880 --> 01:16:21,000
She didn't leave
on her own and I'll prove it.

973
01:16:21,080 --> 01:16:24,800
Pedicure Detective sounds much cooler.

974
01:16:42,080 --> 01:16:43,000
Yuck, damn.

975
01:16:48,480 --> 01:16:49,920
And what have you forgotten here?

976
01:16:50,000 --> 01:16:51,640
Well, I didn't come to look at you.

977
01:16:51,720 --> 01:16:53,320
Where are Veronika
and the kids? Call them.

978
01:16:54,080 --> 01:16:57,480
I could lie to you and tell you
that I'm interested where your sister is

979
01:16:57,560 --> 01:16:58,720
but, honestly, I don't care.

980
01:16:59,920 --> 01:17:01,400
Kitten, who's there?

981
01:17:03,560 --> 01:17:06,320
And what Veronika
are they looking for here?

982
01:17:07,760 --> 01:17:09,480
None at all.

983
01:17:09,560 --> 01:17:12,200
Go back to bed, I'll be there soon.

984
01:17:21,720 --> 01:17:24,160
What about the kids?
Were the kids here at least?

985
01:17:24,240 --> 01:17:27,200
I haven't seen the kids
since your sister left.

986
01:17:27,280 --> 01:17:28,520
But don't worry,

987
01:17:28,600 --> 01:17:30,000
I'll pay the child support,

988
01:17:31,120 --> 01:17:32,640
one day,

989
01:17:32,720 --> 01:17:34,080
possibly.

990
01:17:37,480 --> 01:17:39,160
You're lucky my hands are full.

991
01:17:40,000 --> 01:17:40,880
Jerk!

992
01:18:02,240 --> 01:18:05,960
Hey, Petro, welcome back to normal life.

993
01:18:06,040 --> 01:18:08,520
Honestly, we didn't expect it,
we didn't believe it.

994
01:18:08,600 --> 01:18:10,080
- Exactly.
- To you!

995
01:18:10,160 --> 01:18:12,960
To Petro, no longer a Peter Pan.

996
01:18:16,560 --> 01:18:17,560
We missed you!

997
01:18:17,640 --> 01:18:18,560
Me too.

998
01:18:19,520 --> 01:18:23,200
So, ylang-ylang? Jojoba oil?

999
01:18:24,280 --> 01:18:25,840
Go to hell with your jojoba!

1000
01:18:25,920 --> 01:18:28,000
Why are you so upset?
Everything was honest.

1001
01:18:28,080 --> 01:18:30,600
Petro outlasted a real chick with luggage.

1002
01:18:30,680 --> 01:18:32,120
Or, to be more exact, survived.

1003
01:18:32,200 --> 01:18:34,240
She's not a chick.

1004
01:18:34,320 --> 01:18:35,640
And the kids are not luggage.

1005
01:18:37,080 --> 01:18:41,360
I can't believe I'm asking this,
but did you fall in love, son?

1006
01:18:41,440 --> 01:18:43,040
Exactly, exactly!

1007
01:18:44,400 --> 01:18:47,640
Petro, did you fall in love? With whom?

1008
01:18:47,720 --> 01:18:49,840
I'll go get an autograph.

1009
01:18:49,920 --> 01:18:54,280
It's someone on the Red List
of Threatened Species.

1010
01:18:54,360 --> 01:18:57,400
Petro, tell us, did it happen or not?

1011
01:18:57,480 --> 01:18:59,440
- You make me sick.
- I can see that it happened.

1012
01:18:59,520 --> 01:19:02,480
Enough, enough. Come clean,

1013
01:19:02,560 --> 01:19:04,800
what did you do to my sister
and where did she go?

1014
01:19:04,880 --> 01:19:07,440
Let her tell you herself.

1015
01:19:07,520 --> 01:19:10,600
She's nowhere to be found.
She isn't answering her phone,

1016
01:19:10,680 --> 01:19:13,760
I paid a visit to her ex and she
wasn't there. She didn't return to him.

1017
01:19:14,360 --> 01:19:16,160
Tell me what happened, big mouth?

1018
01:19:16,240 --> 01:19:17,840
I'm the big mouth?

1019
01:19:17,920 --> 01:19:21,760
And who told the nieces that I'm a mutant
who wants to destroy humanity?

1020
01:19:21,840 --> 01:19:25,040
Who paid off the kids so that they would
unleash Armageddon upon me?

1021
01:19:25,120 --> 01:19:27,760
Hey, giving gifts
to the nieces is not a sin.

1022
01:19:27,840 --> 01:19:32,000
Oleh, you consider it honest
to force me out of my own home

1023
01:19:32,080 --> 01:19:34,800
for the sake of some Porsche? A friend?

1024
01:19:34,880 --> 01:19:38,560
Yes, a friend,
and for over 30 years, your best friend.

1025
01:19:39,280 --> 01:19:43,200
Okay, I confess, it was killing me
to give you the Porsche.

1026
01:19:43,280 --> 01:19:44,760
Yeah, I bet.

1027
01:19:45,600 --> 01:19:48,280
Look, to hell with the Porsche!

1028
01:19:48,920 --> 01:19:53,560
Petro, now you know
that you can live in a different way.

1029
01:19:53,640 --> 01:19:55,480
Now you know you can!

1030
01:19:55,560 --> 01:19:59,440
Or you can just shit your life away -

1031
01:19:59,520 --> 01:20:01,280
year after year -
on these wild drunken parties,

1032
01:20:01,360 --> 01:20:03,400
sex without obligations and all.

1033
01:20:03,480 --> 01:20:05,200
And a different life means what exactly?

1034
01:20:05,760 --> 01:20:08,000
Being dumped for no reason?

1035
01:20:09,200 --> 01:20:10,840
Them disappearing into thin air

1036
01:20:10,920 --> 01:20:13,120
and leaving you a note
on your bloody fridge?

1037
01:20:13,200 --> 01:20:16,000
Thanks, but I'm not
into soap operas. I prefer it like this.

1038
01:20:16,080 --> 01:20:17,280
With no obligations.

1039
01:20:18,440 --> 01:20:20,600
Sweetie, did you miss me?
Well, then let's go.

1040
01:20:20,680 --> 01:20:22,200
Oh, brother.

1041
01:20:41,360 --> 01:20:42,520
You're so fast.

1042
01:20:43,280 --> 01:20:46,920
Of course. Life is so short.

1043
01:21:07,000 --> 01:21:09,400
Wait, little one, quiet, quiet.

1044
01:21:12,720 --> 01:21:15,040
<i>You really are a mutant.</i>

1045
01:21:15,120 --> 01:21:18,640
<i>A real man would never
have offended our mother.</i>

1046
01:21:18,720 --> 01:21:20,960
<i>She thought that you wanted to help,</i>

1047
01:21:21,040 --> 01:21:23,360
<i>but you just did it for that car.</i>

1048
01:21:23,440 --> 01:21:26,320
<i>And how you lied that we're a gang. Yuck!</i>

1049
01:21:26,400 --> 01:21:27,800
<i>Mother is crying because of you.</i>

1050
01:21:28,680 --> 01:21:30,760
<i>You're even worse than our father.</i>

1051
01:21:55,080 --> 01:21:57,640
Petro, Petro, where are you going?

1052
01:21:58,280 --> 01:22:00,000
What do you think I'm doing?

1053
01:22:00,080 --> 01:22:02,520
She found out about our bet, bro.

1054
01:22:03,560 --> 01:22:04,840
Come on, let's go.

1055
01:22:09,680 --> 01:22:13,960
The last thing I heard was that she found
a job in some amazing choir.

1056
01:22:14,720 --> 01:22:16,280
What do you mean by "some amazing choir"?

1057
01:22:16,840 --> 01:22:19,040
Bro, I thought that you knew
where we were going?

1058
01:22:19,120 --> 01:22:21,280
Oleh, stop annoying me
and start googling choirs.

1059
01:22:21,360 --> 01:22:23,560
OK, I'm googling choirs.

1060
01:22:24,480 --> 01:22:25,880
Choirs.

1061
01:22:27,280 --> 01:22:32,880
Oh, if she said it was
the best one, then it's this one.

1062
01:22:32,960 --> 01:22:34,320
Here, a women's church choir.

1063
01:22:37,520 --> 01:22:39,000
I'll go alone.

1064
01:22:40,040 --> 01:22:46,440
<i>Angry wind is howling...</i>

1065
01:22:46,520 --> 01:22:47,960
Stop, stop, stop, stop!

1066
01:22:48,040 --> 01:22:49,920
Please, let's start again
from the beginning.

1067
01:22:50,920 --> 01:22:52,280
Who brought you here?

1068
01:22:55,000 --> 01:22:55,960
Please.

1069
01:22:57,160 --> 01:23:03,440
<i>It's roaring and moaning</i>

1070
01:23:03,520 --> 01:23:10,120
<i>The wide Dnieper River</i>

1071
01:23:13,080 --> 01:23:19,520
<i>The angry wind</i>

1072
01:23:19,600 --> 01:23:24,800
<i>Is howling...</i>

1073
01:23:24,880 --> 01:23:27,000
Stop, stop! What's that howling?

1074
01:23:27,080 --> 01:23:29,080
What's that howling?

1075
01:23:29,160 --> 01:23:30,200
What is that?

1076
01:23:30,280 --> 01:23:31,360
I...

1077
01:23:31,440 --> 01:23:33,600
Sorry, please continue, continue.

1078
01:23:33,680 --> 01:23:36,000
What was that? Who let him in here?

1079
01:23:37,000 --> 01:23:39,560
Maybe she became a nun because of you?

1080
01:23:39,640 --> 01:23:42,640
Oh, a woman's church choir.

1081
01:23:59,640 --> 01:24:02,200
Oops, sorry,

1082
01:24:03,680 --> 01:24:05,800
amen, pardon, my mistake. Oh, Lord!

1083
01:24:05,880 --> 01:24:08,680
My mistake. Oh, Lord!

1084
01:24:11,960 --> 01:24:13,080
One choir left.

1085
01:24:14,480 --> 01:24:17,600
I also feel like the last choir.

1086
01:24:17,680 --> 01:24:19,320
Well, then turn around.

1087
01:24:29,000 --> 01:24:30,920
The concert
has started, I won't let you in.

1088
01:24:52,720 --> 01:24:55,080
Where, what, are you blind? There she is.

1089
01:24:57,880 --> 01:25:01,640
Veronika, come back.

1090
01:25:04,440 --> 01:25:08,760
Sorry, I'm purposefully,
I mean, not on purpose...

1091
01:25:08,840 --> 01:25:11,040
- Stop climbing over my head!
- Sorry, sorry.

1092
01:25:12,720 --> 01:25:13,960
Careful!

1093
01:25:19,080 --> 01:25:20,560
I can't live without you!

1094
01:25:25,000 --> 01:25:26,400
Without you,

1095
01:25:27,440 --> 01:25:28,280
without all of you...

1096
01:25:33,360 --> 01:25:35,800
I was so afraid of children,

1097
01:25:35,880 --> 01:25:38,760
responsibility, broccoli
and that damned Bach,

1098
01:25:39,840 --> 01:25:42,080
but now I love all of that.
Can you imagine?

1099
01:25:42,720 --> 01:25:44,400
I love how you smile.

1100
01:25:44,480 --> 01:25:46,920
I love your reservedness.
I adore the children.

1101
01:25:47,000 --> 01:25:49,000
I'm ready to forgive them for everything!

1102
01:25:49,080 --> 01:25:51,960
For cutting up my dollars,
for destroying my passport,

1103
01:25:52,040 --> 01:25:54,880
for arranging Niagara Falls in my shower.

1104
01:25:56,400 --> 01:26:00,160
I've never wanted a family
because I didn't have you.

1105
01:26:04,440 --> 01:26:05,800
Become my family!

1106
01:26:10,520 --> 01:26:13,200
Mom, we agree.

1107
01:26:13,280 --> 01:26:14,640
Hear what our children are saying?

1108
01:26:17,440 --> 01:26:21,120
Sister, sorry, this was my mistake.

1109
01:26:21,200 --> 01:26:22,440
Please forgive me. Sorry,

1110
01:26:22,520 --> 01:26:25,720
I persuaded him to take part
in this damned bet.

1111
01:26:25,800 --> 01:26:26,640
Yes, it was him.

1112
01:26:26,720 --> 01:26:27,680
It was me.

1113
01:26:28,360 --> 01:26:32,120
But agree that it's so awesome
when the people closest to me

1114
01:26:32,200 --> 01:26:34,600
are going to be happy together.

1115
01:26:35,560 --> 01:26:38,560
By the way, I know that you've had
the hots for him since you were a kid.

1116
01:26:42,800 --> 01:26:43,880
What about that Porsche?

1117
01:26:44,600 --> 01:26:46,560
To hell with that Porsche!

1118
01:26:49,760 --> 01:26:51,960
Let's give it to your choir as a gift.

1119
01:26:54,200 --> 01:26:55,920
Right, Oleh?

1120
01:26:57,080 --> 01:26:59,560
Yes, of course,
let's give it to the choir.

1121
01:26:59,640 --> 01:27:02,120
Hurray! Hurray, people!

1122
01:27:02,200 --> 01:27:05,000
If we sell that Porsche,

1123
01:27:05,080 --> 01:27:09,480
then we'll definitely go
to the competition in Vienna.

1124
01:27:09,560 --> 01:27:11,600
Vienna!

1125
01:27:16,560 --> 01:27:19,600
Maybe we'll even have enough money
left for new costumes.

1126
01:27:29,400 --> 01:27:30,720
Sister!

1127
01:27:30,800 --> 01:27:32,200
Come on, Veronika!

1128
01:27:32,280 --> 01:27:33,920
Definitely, come on.

1129
01:27:34,000 --> 01:27:39,320
Come on, come on, come on, come on!

1130
01:27:39,400 --> 01:27:43,120
- Come on!
- Yeah, come on!

1131
01:27:43,200 --> 01:27:45,800
Come on!

1132
01:27:49,720 --> 01:27:54,520
<i>Let's sing</i>

1133
01:27:54,600 --> 01:27:59,520
<i>A happy song</i>

1134
01:28:00,360 --> 01:28:03,200
<i>About a young neighbor</i>

1135
01:28:03,280 --> 01:28:06,160
<i>Let's sing about a neighbor</i>

1136
01:28:06,240 --> 01:28:09,640
<i>Let's make our heart happy</i>

1137
01:28:09,720 --> 01:28:15,600
<i>Oh, neighbor-neighbor
Lend me a sieve</i>

1138
01:28:15,680 --> 01:28:21,320
<i>I will sift some flour
I will bring it to you tomorrow</i>

1139
01:28:21,400 --> 01:28:27,320
<i>I will sift some flour
I will bring it to you tomorrow</i>

1140
01:28:27,400 --> 01:28:33,320
<i>Let's sing a happy song
About a young lady</i>

1141
01:28:33,400 --> 01:28:36,120
<i>Let's sing about the lady</i>

1142
01:28:36,200 --> 01:28:41,880
<i>To make our heart happy</i>