1
00:00:13,339 --> 00:00:16,260
One million students report back for
first day of school.

2
00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:20,700
Two million parents giggle hysterically
with glee.

3
00:00:21,880 --> 00:00:24,520
I bet it's so quiet around here you'll
miss them by noon.

4
00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:34,260
New pants?

5
00:00:36,060 --> 00:00:37,060
I'm sick.

6
00:00:39,260 --> 00:00:42,020
Well, you didn't seem so sick when you
ate those three waffles.

7
00:00:43,340 --> 00:00:44,880
Maybe I got wholesome bad syrup.

8
00:00:46,360 --> 00:00:47,360
You know what I think?

9
00:00:48,040 --> 00:00:49,420
Yeah, I'm going to school.

10
00:00:50,340 --> 00:00:52,460
All right, it's going to be a great day
or what?

11
00:00:53,140 --> 00:00:55,240
You're excited about the first day of
school?

12
00:00:55,740 --> 00:00:56,740
Yes.

13
00:00:57,320 --> 00:01:00,780
And look at Mike. Even he's anxious to
get back to school.

14
00:01:01,040 --> 00:01:03,720
Yeah, it's the beginning of my junior
year. Don't you know what that means?

15
00:01:04,060 --> 00:01:05,880
It means I'm more mature now.

16
00:01:06,140 --> 00:01:07,340
It means I'm more responsible.

17
00:01:07,680 --> 00:01:10,560
It means that in less than two years,
I'm going to be getting out of that

18
00:01:12,970 --> 00:01:15,770
Yo -Yo would be excited about the first
day of school.

19
00:01:16,310 --> 00:01:18,030
Good morning, all.

20
00:01:19,890 --> 00:01:21,910
Carol, your new outfit looks great.

21
00:01:22,230 --> 00:01:24,570
It's not too sexy.

22
00:01:25,370 --> 00:01:26,510
Maybe for Bulgaria.

23
00:01:28,830 --> 00:01:30,490
I think you look terrific.

24
00:01:30,990 --> 00:01:36,490
Yeah, well, I just want to get on the
right foot. I mean, a new year, new

25
00:01:36,490 --> 00:01:39,730
challenges, new clothes, new friends.
New bits.

26
00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:50,260
ready for school? Yeah.

27
00:01:50,580 --> 00:01:54,660
Well, your sister has your books,
notebooks, paper, pencils, binders,

28
00:01:54,660 --> 00:01:56,640
dividers. Mom, I know where you're going
here.

29
00:01:57,600 --> 00:02:01,420
Now, Carol's not the only one who's
prepared for school. I'm just not a

30
00:02:03,180 --> 00:02:05,760
Now, what have you done to prepare for
school?

31
00:02:06,400 --> 00:02:07,780
All right, all right.

32
00:02:08,199 --> 00:02:09,900
Tonight, there's a welcome back dance.

33
00:02:10,539 --> 00:02:11,980
I've already got myself a date.

34
00:02:25,740 --> 00:02:27,440
Spirit's ready to begin.

35
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As long as we got each other.

36
00:03:09,940 --> 00:03:10,940
Gentlemen.

37
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Oh, no.

38
00:03:12,960 --> 00:03:13,960
Hey,

39
00:03:16,340 --> 00:03:18,400
what's that on your face? That's a
mustache.

40
00:03:18,900 --> 00:03:20,500
A mustache? It wasn't there last week.

41
00:03:20,740 --> 00:03:21,740
I'm Italian.

42
00:03:22,660 --> 00:03:23,880
No, no, it's Toronto.

43
00:03:24,180 --> 00:03:25,520
It's not Toronto. It's Texas.

44
00:03:25,740 --> 00:03:29,440
It's a jungle of hair. What do your
parents think about this?

45
00:03:29,720 --> 00:03:30,720
They ain't noticed yet.

46
00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:34,400
Hi, Mike.

47
00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:37,100
Oh, hi, Elaine. Are we meeting at the
dance? Are you picking me up?

48
00:03:37,930 --> 00:03:39,810
Elaine, I'm a class dude. Of course I'm
going to pick you up.

49
00:03:40,070 --> 00:03:41,230
See ya. Bye -bye.

50
00:03:44,810 --> 00:03:47,690
Michael, Mikey, you're taking Elaine
Dooley to the dance?

51
00:03:48,070 --> 00:03:49,610
Oh, didn't I mention that to you guys?

52
00:03:49,870 --> 00:03:51,070
Would she, like, lose a bet or
something?

53
00:03:52,330 --> 00:03:56,150
You know, I have been working on that
girl all summer long, laying down the

54
00:03:56,150 --> 00:03:59,830
basis for a deep and meaningful
relationship that's built on trust,

55
00:04:00,090 --> 00:04:04,170
understanding, and a mutual, whoa, who's
that fox over there?

56
00:04:17,320 --> 00:04:18,319
I got dibs on her.

57
00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:19,320
Yeah, I said it first.

58
00:04:19,500 --> 00:04:21,120
Aw. You got a lane.

59
00:04:21,420 --> 00:04:23,780
If you'll excuse me, boys, I have to
meet this creature.

60
00:04:23,980 --> 00:04:26,980
Hey, Mike, I thought you had some deep
personal relationship going here.

61
00:04:27,280 --> 00:04:29,140
That's so nice. You learn as you grow
older, Eddie.

62
00:04:29,660 --> 00:04:31,440
Relationships just don't always work out
like you planned.

63
00:04:39,300 --> 00:04:43,380
Tough schedule, kid.

64
00:04:44,590 --> 00:04:47,910
It's a brand new year, and I wanted it
to be a challenge.

65
00:04:48,810 --> 00:04:50,070
Get out of here.

66
00:04:52,890 --> 00:04:54,350
What'd you get? Right. Uh -huh.

67
00:04:54,930 --> 00:04:57,410
Algebra 2, physics, conversational
Latin.

68
00:04:57,650 --> 00:05:00,310
Wow, you got the same. Right. Uh -huh.
Fifth year.

69
00:05:00,570 --> 00:05:01,570
Right. Uh -huh.

70
00:05:03,590 --> 00:05:04,590
Oh, good.

71
00:05:06,510 --> 00:05:08,430
Well, it's only 9 .30.

72
00:05:08,730 --> 00:05:09,750
Good things could start.

73
00:05:15,560 --> 00:05:18,600
This is a nicer classroom than you had
last year, isn't it, Ben?

74
00:05:20,200 --> 00:05:21,200
Ben?

75
00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:25,020
Honey, is something wrong?

76
00:05:26,300 --> 00:05:27,300
No.

77
00:05:28,360 --> 00:05:31,700
No! Well, don't play around. I want to
meet your teacher and I'm already late

78
00:05:31,700 --> 00:05:32,700
for work.

79
00:05:35,000 --> 00:05:38,660
Mark! Ben! You actually showed up. Is he
here?

80
00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:40,000
Hi, I don't see him.

81
00:05:41,020 --> 00:05:43,980
Hello, I'm Maggie Seaver, Ben's mother.
Maggie Seaver?

82
00:05:44,440 --> 00:05:45,460
You're Mike's mother.

83
00:05:46,220 --> 00:05:47,220
Yes.

84
00:05:47,840 --> 00:05:50,820
Oh, Mrs. Cutter, I didn't recognize you.

85
00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:54,280
But you remembered me. I remember Mike.

86
00:05:56,240 --> 00:05:58,380
Is Louis Vasco in this class?

87
00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:00,280
Louis Vasco? Big kid. No.

88
00:06:00,680 --> 00:06:01,680
All right!

89
00:06:02,920 --> 00:06:05,780
Cutter, I don't know what's going on,
but Ben's been a little hesitant about

90
00:06:05,780 --> 00:06:08,400
coming back to school. He is a lot like
Mike.

91
00:06:10,180 --> 00:06:11,540
Boy, are you lucky.

92
00:06:16,910 --> 00:06:17,910
It was ready.

93
00:06:18,930 --> 00:06:19,930
Fine.

94
00:06:20,950 --> 00:06:21,950
Are you all right?

95
00:06:22,170 --> 00:06:25,090
Great. Well, good. Bye, honey. Have a
good day. Bye.

96
00:06:26,050 --> 00:06:28,130
Ben! I just don't know.

97
00:06:28,430 --> 00:06:30,570
Louis Vasco is at this school.

98
00:06:30,950 --> 00:06:33,510
What? Yeah. He flunked.

99
00:06:34,470 --> 00:06:35,810
And he's still mean.

100
00:06:36,690 --> 00:06:38,030
He's gonna kill you, Ben.

101
00:06:39,670 --> 00:06:41,530
You're your summer fever state.

102
00:06:42,130 --> 00:06:45,750
Gonna be your last one when we get back
to school.

103
00:06:46,320 --> 00:06:48,260
You're dead meat. Hear me?

104
00:06:48,640 --> 00:06:49,880
Dead meat.

105
00:06:51,060 --> 00:06:52,060
Dead meat.

106
00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:54,960
Dead meat.

107
00:06:57,880 --> 00:07:01,340
Hey, what's the rush, cowboy? Look,
Eddie, I got no time, right? Oh, of

108
00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:03,100
You don't want to be late for biology on
frog day.

109
00:07:03,360 --> 00:07:04,600
Eddie, Eddie the blonde.

110
00:07:05,160 --> 00:07:06,520
Again? Eye contact.

111
00:07:19,150 --> 00:07:20,150
things to get better.

112
00:07:22,110 --> 00:07:23,110
Come on.

113
00:07:24,670 --> 00:07:26,550
Oh, Carol, did you drop your books?

114
00:07:27,870 --> 00:07:29,850
Hey, I'm sorry. Here, let me help,
Carol.

115
00:07:30,390 --> 00:07:32,990
Well, speaking of help, I need to know
the name of the blonde in your history

116
00:07:32,990 --> 00:07:33,990
class.

117
00:07:34,130 --> 00:07:36,630
Well, there's Roger Froman.

118
00:07:37,510 --> 00:07:39,010
No, Carol, I mean the girl.

119
00:07:39,910 --> 00:07:41,070
Oh, Becky Dworkin.

120
00:07:42,330 --> 00:07:43,330
Bucktooth Becky.

121
00:07:44,410 --> 00:07:46,630
Don't you agree to eat corn on the cob
through a knot hole?

122
00:07:48,430 --> 00:07:50,170
Carol, this girl was a living dream.

123
00:07:50,990 --> 00:07:51,990
She's new.

124
00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:22,640
Cheech locked me in. I think he was
jealous of my mustache.

125
00:08:23,980 --> 00:08:24,919
What a jerk.

126
00:08:24,920 --> 00:08:25,920
Got me out of history.

127
00:08:27,420 --> 00:08:31,060
Oh, come on, Mike. We got biology
chemists two in a row. There she is. See

128
00:08:31,060 --> 00:08:33,140
later, Bone. Mike, I don't want to go to
biology alone.

129
00:08:33,380 --> 00:08:34,380
Cheech is there.

130
00:08:52,110 --> 00:08:52,689
Sure, people.

131
00:08:52,690 --> 00:08:58,570
I'm Coach Lubbock, and I'll be covering
French 3 while Mademoiselle Goldstein is

132
00:08:58,570 --> 00:08:59,830
a little bit under the weather.

133
00:09:01,850 --> 00:09:03,750
Grab a desk, mon chure.

134
00:09:06,130 --> 00:09:07,530
Tres bon, sport.

135
00:09:08,710 --> 00:09:14,370
Okay, I believe today is a little review
of French 2, so what I'm going to

136
00:09:14,370 --> 00:09:19,230
speak... Mademoiselle Goldstein fait
toujours trop court tout en français.

137
00:09:29,520 --> 00:09:30,820
conducts the entire class in French.

138
00:09:31,260 --> 00:09:33,520
Bon, very trust, Bon.

139
00:09:34,880 --> 00:09:39,100
Tell you what we'll do, we'll have this
young lady stand up here and tell us

140
00:09:39,100 --> 00:09:40,620
what she did for her summer vacation.

141
00:09:42,180 --> 00:09:44,180
Come and tell -y -vous them.

142
00:09:44,620 --> 00:09:45,620
Okay.

143
00:09:59,070 --> 00:10:00,770
Johnny est très amusant.

144
00:10:01,530 --> 00:10:05,870
Oh, j 'ai rencontré un garçon qui s
'appelle... I'm sorry, but I just had

145
00:10:05,870 --> 00:10:07,490
Shh! Not now, Mike.

146
00:10:08,150 --> 00:10:09,150
You heard me?

147
00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:11,510
Shh! Later.

148
00:10:12,290 --> 00:10:13,290
Ah, when?

149
00:10:14,510 --> 00:10:16,330
Mimi had to dance tonight at 8.

150
00:10:16,610 --> 00:10:18,130
Ah, okay. She had to dance.

151
00:10:18,390 --> 00:10:19,430
She had to dance.

152
00:10:19,830 --> 00:10:21,490
Wait a minute. I don't even know your
name.

153
00:10:21,950 --> 00:10:22,950
Hey, buddy.

154
00:10:23,330 --> 00:10:25,910
You talk French so good you don't need
this?

155
00:10:28,970 --> 00:10:30,050
You mean this isn't biology?

156
00:10:31,250 --> 00:10:32,250
Out.

157
00:10:33,030 --> 00:10:34,030
Out.

158
00:10:34,630 --> 00:10:36,810
Bonjour, monsieur, adios.

159
00:10:38,850 --> 00:10:39,850
Are you done?

160
00:10:40,070 --> 00:10:42,690
Oui, oui. No, no, you should have
thought of that before class.

161
00:10:44,830 --> 00:10:48,730
All right, Stevie, you have got yourself
one hot date for the day.

162
00:10:49,010 --> 00:10:49,969
Hi, Mike.

163
00:10:49,970 --> 00:10:50,970
See you tonight.

164
00:10:51,030 --> 00:10:52,030
Hey, you bet.

165
00:11:01,040 --> 00:11:02,040
I got a problem.

166
00:11:02,240 --> 00:11:03,480
What kind of problem?

167
00:11:09,060 --> 00:11:11,020
Lift those legs, girl.

168
00:11:11,280 --> 00:11:12,280
I'm lifting.

169
00:11:12,440 --> 00:11:13,500
Tighten those thighs.

170
00:11:14,320 --> 00:11:15,320
I'm tightening.

171
00:11:15,400 --> 00:11:17,220
Firm up that bottom.

172
00:11:17,460 --> 00:11:18,460
I'm still tightening.

173
00:11:18,640 --> 00:11:19,640
Oh, very good.

174
00:11:20,660 --> 00:11:22,000
Now, the chest.

175
00:11:23,520 --> 00:11:27,120
Let's make up for all those years of
going braless, shall we?

176
00:11:35,590 --> 00:11:36,590
Hello.

177
00:11:37,090 --> 00:11:38,310
Yeah, this is Ben's father.

178
00:11:40,870 --> 00:11:42,310
Well, that doesn't sound like Ben.

179
00:11:44,110 --> 00:11:45,310
All right, I'll be right over.

180
00:11:48,950 --> 00:11:50,450
Where did I leave my bra?

181
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:12,200
the new year, and I thought that we'd
been together at lunch for so long that

182
00:12:12,200 --> 00:12:16,380
new people would be good for us. Wow,
you're like... Dumping us? Right. Uh

183
00:12:17,740 --> 00:12:20,740
Because it wouldn't be the same. I mean,
we've eaten lunch together since the

184
00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:22,560
fifth grade. Of course. Right. Uh -huh.

185
00:12:22,840 --> 00:12:25,420
And I don't deal well with major change.

186
00:12:26,640 --> 00:12:27,499
I'm sick.

187
00:12:27,500 --> 00:12:28,500
Sick. Right.

188
00:12:29,860 --> 00:12:32,740
Wow, that must be great to find two
women who'll show you like that.

189
00:12:37,920 --> 00:12:38,980
stupid. I'm stupid?

190
00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:41,860
You've got a date with two girls and I'm
stupid?

191
00:12:43,860 --> 00:12:44,860
I am stupid.

192
00:12:46,180 --> 00:12:47,520
So who are you going to cut loose,
Mikey?

193
00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:51,340
Look, Eddie, I'm going to go over there
and I'm going to talk to Elaine and I'm

194
00:12:51,340 --> 00:12:54,400
going to let her down very gently, very
easily. Into the dumperoo, right.

195
00:12:55,420 --> 00:12:56,420
Watch me.

196
00:12:58,080 --> 00:12:59,400
Not kidding. Here he comes.

197
00:12:59,860 --> 00:13:00,860
Elaine?

198
00:13:01,160 --> 00:13:02,340
Oh, Mike. Hi.

199
00:13:02,620 --> 00:13:04,120
Hi. Can we talk for a minute?

200
00:13:08,140 --> 00:13:09,140
Did you want to sit?

201
00:13:09,340 --> 00:13:11,040
Uh, no, no, I can't sit.

202
00:13:13,060 --> 00:13:14,060
So... What?

203
00:13:14,820 --> 00:13:17,660
You know, I should just tell you... Is
it about the dance? Yeah.

204
00:13:17,900 --> 00:13:20,740
I'm so excited. Wait until you see the
new outfit I got.

205
00:13:21,020 --> 00:13:22,140
You got a new outfit?

206
00:13:23,360 --> 00:13:26,600
Yeah, and it's really hot. I got it at
Chadwick's department store.

207
00:13:27,780 --> 00:13:30,760
Great store. You know, very liberal
return policy.

208
00:13:32,040 --> 00:13:34,640
All I've been able to think about all
day is the dance.

209
00:13:36,380 --> 00:13:37,380
What a coincidence.

210
00:13:40,400 --> 00:13:42,840
Mike, I found her at Dream Girl, room
204.

211
00:13:43,180 --> 00:13:44,039
Thanks, great.

212
00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:46,900
Now, if I were you, I wouldn't dust the
blonde. I'd dump Elaine.

213
00:13:48,760 --> 00:13:52,060
I'm not dusting the blonde. I'm just
putting her on hold until next week, all

214
00:13:52,060 --> 00:13:54,580
right? Hey, Eddie, here, tell me, how's
it sound like, okay?

215
00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:57,200
Hi.

216
00:13:57,740 --> 00:13:59,740
Call me crazy, but this just can't wait.

217
00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:03,320
You know, I think that we've got
something really special here between

218
00:14:03,710 --> 00:14:06,530
And I don't want to share that with a
bunch of high school kids in dance.

219
00:14:07,230 --> 00:14:09,670
I'm going to say you and me go out
instead next week.

220
00:14:10,010 --> 00:14:11,010
That's cool.

221
00:14:19,650 --> 00:14:20,650
Hi.

222
00:14:21,090 --> 00:14:22,090
Hi.

223
00:14:22,370 --> 00:14:25,110
Look, call me crazy, but this just
couldn't wait.

224
00:14:25,390 --> 00:14:26,830
You know, I think we've... Hi, Mike.

225
00:14:27,410 --> 00:14:28,410
Hi, Elaine.

226
00:14:32,590 --> 00:14:33,710
He could wait after all.

227
00:14:41,150 --> 00:14:45,390
You can talk to him in here till recess
ends. Thanks.

228
00:14:45,950 --> 00:14:49,530
Boy, when you're small, people don't
even ask you if you want your parents

229
00:14:49,530 --> 00:14:52,890
called. So I understand you want to be
transferred to another school.

230
00:14:53,750 --> 00:14:55,890
Yeah, well, this place is getting kind
of old.

231
00:14:56,770 --> 00:14:59,570
Well, that would be difficult. You see,
for you to go to another school, we've

232
00:14:59,570 --> 00:15:00,730
got to move to another district.

233
00:15:01,180 --> 00:15:02,180
Is that a problem?

234
00:15:03,040 --> 00:15:04,040
Yes.

235
00:15:04,540 --> 00:15:06,620
I got it. How about Hebrew school?

236
00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:11,160
How about you telling me why some kid
wants to fight with you?

237
00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:12,439
You heard?

238
00:15:12,440 --> 00:15:13,440
Mm -hmm.

239
00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:16,560
See, there's this big mean kid, Louis
Vasco.

240
00:15:16,760 --> 00:15:18,860
And last year I wouldn't let him cheat
off me.

241
00:15:19,080 --> 00:15:20,080
Well, good for you.

242
00:15:20,340 --> 00:15:21,540
He sent a message.

243
00:15:21,800 --> 00:15:23,280
Three o 'clock, boys' bathroom.

244
00:15:26,020 --> 00:15:27,680
Ben, this is so strange.

245
00:15:29,860 --> 00:15:31,850
Well, it wouldn't be. me in the girls'
bathroom.

246
00:15:32,490 --> 00:15:34,050
No, I mean this whole situation.

247
00:15:34,490 --> 00:15:36,810
Would you believe the same thing
happened to me?

248
00:15:37,130 --> 00:15:38,130
Come on, Dad.

249
00:15:38,630 --> 00:15:39,710
You don't believe me?

250
00:15:39,970 --> 00:15:44,510
You're going to do like you always do
and tell me some story of how you didn't

251
00:15:44,510 --> 00:15:46,370
run and you ended up being friends.

252
00:15:47,790 --> 00:15:48,790
No, I ran.

253
00:15:49,570 --> 00:15:52,950
What? I was 11 years old and I was
trying out for this baseball team, the

254
00:15:52,950 --> 00:15:56,470
Oilers. Well, it came right down to me
or this other boy for the third base

255
00:15:56,470 --> 00:15:57,470
position.

256
00:15:57,979 --> 00:16:00,620
Well, boy wasn't really right. This kid
was a gorilla.

257
00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:02,560
They called him Killer.

258
00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:04,480
What'd you do?

259
00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:06,240
I quit.

260
00:16:06,740 --> 00:16:08,520
I didn't play baseball that whole year.

261
00:16:10,360 --> 00:16:14,280
Anyway, I didn't see Killer again for,
well, 15 years.

262
00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:16,240
And I saw him at a reunion.

263
00:16:16,800 --> 00:16:18,180
He had a big beer belly.

264
00:16:18,660 --> 00:16:21,200
All athletes end up with beer bellies.

265
00:16:22,540 --> 00:16:26,780
And I was there with your mom. And
Killer, whose real name was Ralph...

266
00:16:27,680 --> 00:16:28,680
What's your point?

267
00:16:29,220 --> 00:16:32,840
Well, the point is he told me he was
glad that I didn't fight him that day.

268
00:16:33,180 --> 00:16:36,520
Why? Because he was just as afraid of me
as I was of him.

269
00:16:37,860 --> 00:16:39,600
Big guys are afraid, too?

270
00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:40,920
Yeah.

271
00:16:41,740 --> 00:16:44,420
So you're saying I should face this guy
like a man?

272
00:16:44,660 --> 00:16:45,660
That's right.

273
00:16:45,980 --> 00:16:49,940
Then if that doesn't work and he starts
to hit you, then you run like the wind.

274
00:16:52,280 --> 00:16:54,280
Excuse me, do my chins have a date for
tonight's dance?

275
00:16:55,160 --> 00:16:56,500
Pardon me, but I, uh...

276
00:16:58,900 --> 00:17:00,920
Hi. Why won't anyone go to the dentist?

277
00:17:01,260 --> 00:17:04,560
Oh, sorry, Carol. I thought you was just
a regular girl.

278
00:17:04,900 --> 00:17:07,280
2 p .m. and things are not getting
better.

279
00:17:08,579 --> 00:17:12,140
I give up. I'm sorry. I thought I'd try
something new, but it didn't work.

280
00:17:12,599 --> 00:17:15,420
Tell me about it. Nothing ever changes
for me.

281
00:17:16,380 --> 00:17:17,380
Homer?

282
00:17:18,540 --> 00:17:20,920
I know exactly how you feel.

283
00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:22,460
I'm like dog drool.

284
00:17:26,349 --> 00:17:28,650
I was expecting today to be different,
too.

285
00:17:29,090 --> 00:17:31,490
I was stupid enough to even think I
could get it, Dave.

286
00:17:31,870 --> 00:17:34,130
All I wanted was something new.

287
00:17:34,410 --> 00:17:37,550
Something different. Something unusual.

288
00:17:42,490 --> 00:17:47,710
If I did agree to go to this dance with
you, which I have... Right, right,

289
00:17:47,750 --> 00:17:48,750
right.

290
00:17:50,110 --> 00:17:51,530
You'd have to agree to certain
conditions.

291
00:17:51,850 --> 00:17:52,850
Anything.

292
00:17:53,170 --> 00:17:54,310
No hand -holding.

293
00:17:55,129 --> 00:17:57,790
No slow dancing, no fast dancing.

294
00:17:58,630 --> 00:18:01,330
And if you agree to go with me, I don't
even have to show up.

295
00:18:01,570 --> 00:18:02,570
Do I?

296
00:18:02,630 --> 00:18:03,630
No.

297
00:18:04,570 --> 00:18:06,210
Okay, you've got your date.

298
00:18:06,930 --> 00:18:08,610
And you've got something unusual.

299
00:18:49,139 --> 00:18:51,200
Louis? Do you see your face?

300
00:18:52,180 --> 00:18:54,220
I hear you've been looking for me.

301
00:18:54,820 --> 00:18:55,820
Yeah.

302
00:18:56,060 --> 00:18:57,300
So I'm here.

303
00:18:57,760 --> 00:18:59,700
What's the matter? Afraid to come in?

304
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:01,700
You're afraid to come out.

305
00:19:02,440 --> 00:19:03,440
Louis?

306
00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:07,840
Hey, Dad was right.

307
00:19:08,580 --> 00:19:12,820
All right, you little... You. You grew.

308
00:19:13,320 --> 00:19:16,360
You didn't. I think that's my bus.

309
00:19:20,300 --> 00:19:21,980
Who's actually afraid of you?

310
00:19:22,940 --> 00:19:27,960
Yeah, well, Mark, everybody's a little
bit afraid, even big guys like me.

311
00:19:29,200 --> 00:19:32,240
Now, I don't want to break Elaine's
heart, and I sure don't want to upset

312
00:19:32,240 --> 00:19:36,380
blind, but it's out of my hands, so the
next girl that walks around the corner

313
00:19:36,380 --> 00:19:37,380
is history.

314
00:19:39,580 --> 00:19:41,720
Ha, boner, boner. I know, get lost.

315
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:49,560
Ah, gym class. I misfired on a power
squat.

316
00:19:51,500 --> 00:19:54,740
Yeah, look, I have to see a doctor
tonight.

317
00:19:55,480 --> 00:19:59,760
The dance is out. Yeah, I am really
sorry, Elaine, but I promise we will go

318
00:19:59,760 --> 00:20:00,780
just as soon as I'm home.

319
00:20:02,140 --> 00:20:03,180
I hope you understand.

320
00:20:03,740 --> 00:20:04,740
Of course I do.

321
00:20:05,280 --> 00:20:06,600
Is there anything I can do to help?

322
00:20:06,840 --> 00:20:09,680
No, no, I'd rather not have you see me
like this, okay?

323
00:20:09,880 --> 00:20:11,640
Okay. Take care.

324
00:20:11,860 --> 00:20:12,940
You too. Bye -bye.

325
00:20:18,850 --> 00:20:19,850
You!

326
00:20:19,970 --> 00:20:20,970
Me.

327
00:20:23,830 --> 00:20:28,570
Look, I'm a class dude, and I don't want
to meet my date at the dance, so what

328
00:20:28,570 --> 00:20:29,610
do you say I pick you up?

329
00:20:30,030 --> 00:20:32,110
Date? We don't have a date.

330
00:20:32,830 --> 00:20:34,230
Yes, we do, for the dance tonight.

331
00:20:34,830 --> 00:20:36,530
No, I just said I'd see you there.

332
00:20:37,990 --> 00:20:38,990
Oh, wait a minute.

333
00:20:39,170 --> 00:20:42,190
I get it. You found someone you like
better, and you dumped me, huh?

334
00:20:42,430 --> 00:20:45,310
Oh, no, I could never do something like
that. Could you?

335
00:20:48,330 --> 00:20:49,810
Don't change the subject here.

336
00:20:50,250 --> 00:20:51,290
Mike, you misunderstood.

337
00:20:52,110 --> 00:20:55,090
Misunderstood? Do you have any idea what
I gave up for you?

338
00:20:55,290 --> 00:20:58,390
I didn't ask you to give anything up.
I'll tell you what. I gave up Elaine

339
00:20:58,390 --> 00:20:59,870
Dooley for a date with you.

340
00:21:04,310 --> 00:21:08,630
Mike, I couldn't date you. I don't even
trust you.

341
00:21:09,930 --> 00:21:13,130
Look, before you mistrust me, I suggest
you get to know me.

342
00:21:14,890 --> 00:21:16,370
I do know you, Mike.

343
00:21:16,610 --> 00:21:17,610
From where?

344
00:21:17,760 --> 00:21:19,440
Do you remember the class picnic last
year?

345
00:21:19,760 --> 00:21:23,160
No, no, no, you weren't there. I would
have remembered you. I can prove I was

346
00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:27,840
there. You did that really funny
impression of Bucktooth Becky's work,

347
00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:28,840
remember?

348
00:21:29,620 --> 00:21:31,020
Pass the corn, please.

349
00:21:31,800 --> 00:21:32,800
Very funny.

350
00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:35,920
Becky?

351
00:21:37,520 --> 00:21:38,520
Boy,

352
00:21:38,880 --> 00:21:40,500
you have had quite a summer.

353
00:21:41,280 --> 00:21:43,320
And you have had quite a fall.

354
00:21:53,420 --> 00:21:55,740
So, Jason, were you lonely today?

355
00:21:59,420 --> 00:22:00,420
And Ben,

356
00:22:01,780 --> 00:22:03,180
what did you learn your first day back?

357
00:22:03,500 --> 00:22:06,300
I learned that Hebrew school is not the
answer.

358
00:22:07,880 --> 00:22:08,980
I'll explain later.

359
00:22:14,440 --> 00:22:17,300
So, Carol, was today everything you
hoped it would be?

360
00:22:17,660 --> 00:22:21,380
Well, it started out a little shaky, but
it ended up okay. Ah, good.

361
00:22:22,010 --> 00:22:23,370
I even have a date for the dance.

362
00:22:24,130 --> 00:22:28,630
Great. And the best part is, I don't
even have to go.

363
00:22:36,030 --> 00:22:37,690
Mike, you're late. Where have you been?

364
00:22:37,950 --> 00:22:39,450
Mom, I've been doing some thinking.

365
00:22:40,050 --> 00:22:42,110
Girls have feelings just like regular
people.

366
00:22:43,330 --> 00:22:44,330
Uh -huh.

367
00:22:44,790 --> 00:22:47,950
You know, Mom, I think I've learned more
today than I have in my entire

368
00:22:47,950 --> 00:22:49,030
educational career.

369
00:22:49,510 --> 00:22:51,050
Well, that's great, Mike.

370
00:22:51,580 --> 00:22:52,580
So you have good teachers?

371
00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:55,280
Uh, maybe. I'll find out tomorrow when I
go to class.

372
00:22:59,720 --> 00:23:00,720
Jason?

373
00:23:02,840 --> 00:23:05,540
Mike, seven o 'clock comes early. Let's
go, pal.

374
00:23:06,320 --> 00:23:07,320
All right.

375
00:23:09,500 --> 00:23:11,160
Carol, honey, school in the morning.

376
00:23:11,420 --> 00:23:12,420
All right.

377
00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:16,140
Ben, you're long overdue. Lights out
now.

378
00:23:16,740 --> 00:23:18,960
No way. I'm afraid of the dark.

379
00:23:19,160 --> 00:23:21,000
You know, Ben, this is interesting.

380
00:23:21,340 --> 00:23:24,440
When I was your age, I too was... Ben?

381
00:23:25,320 --> 00:23:27,520
Forget it, Dad. I love the dark.