1 00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:06,480 Today we take a look behind the scenes and under the blanket 2 00:00:06,560 --> 00:00:10,000 and reveal the truth about Rupert Campbell-Black. 3 00:00:10,080 --> 00:00:12,920 The evening before he asks voters him as a member of parliament 4 00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:15,360 to vote for Chalford and Bisley, 5 00:00:15,440 --> 00:00:20,560 we ask ourselves how such a man reached the highest state offices. 6 00:00:20,640 --> 00:00:23,520 Rupert Campbell Black, Show jumper and self-promoter, 7 00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:25,400 Charlatan and impostor, 8 00:00:25,480 --> 00:00:28,320 raised to a safe constituency, maintains a relationship with ... 9 00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:30,240 - She has nothing. - ... Prime Minister ... 10 00:00:30,320 --> 00:00:32,040 - Nothing new. - ... especially for him 11 00:00:32,120 --> 00:00:33,800 created the office of Minister of Sports. 12 00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:36,760 Tony said, This week it's Joan Collins' turn. 13 00:00:36,840 --> 00:00:39,400 ... hides scandalous ones, hastily covered up affairs 14 00:00:39,480 --> 00:00:42,080 with the wives of several Tory colleagues, 15 00:00:42,160 --> 00:00:44,040 including our Sarah Stratton, 16 00:00:44,640 --> 00:00:47,200 lately the woman by MP Paul Stratton. 17 00:00:47,280 --> 00:00:50,840 And Amanda, the wife by Foreign Minister Rollo Hamilton. 18 00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:54,120 Secretly recorded tapes, which were recently sent to us, 19 00:00:54,200 --> 00:00:57,720 show how careless Campbell-Black deals with it. 20 00:00:57,800 --> 00:00:58,800 Oh, shit. 21 00:01:00,320 --> 00:01:03,360 Mandy Hamilton wanted to that I spank her ass. 22 00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:05,600 She called the hairbrush “Daddy”. 23 00:01:06,120 --> 00:01:07,840 Oh God, Beattie. 24 00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:10,760 Earlier I was talking to a woman the one in an art studio 25 00:01:10,840 --> 00:01:13,720 in Soho in the mid-1960s on a... 26 00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:15,760 - What's wrong? - ... group sex meeting. 27 00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:16,840 Tape off. 28 00:01:16,920 --> 00:01:20,040 Can you say who was present at this meeting? 29 00:01:20,120 --> 00:01:24,080 Some rock stars, at least one of the Stones. 30 00:01:24,160 --> 00:01:25,840 A few footballers. 31 00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:27,800 The American actor, Johnny ... 32 00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:29,520 - Johnny Friedlander? - Yes. 33 00:01:29,600 --> 00:01:32,920 And Rupert Campbell-Black. You won't forget that velvety voice. 34 00:01:33,520 --> 00:01:36,720 And has Mr Campbell-Black participated in group sex? 35 00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:38,320 With enthusiasm. 36 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:40,600 Let's put it this way: no one was disappointed. 37 00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:44,480 And I have to ask, in times of AIDS... 38 00:01:44,560 --> 00:01:46,840 Was anyone there using contraception? 39 00:01:46,920 --> 00:01:47,920 Preventive measures? 40 00:01:48,960 --> 00:01:50,320 We were all stoned. 41 00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:54,240 I've always said it, Fred-Fred. Now he's infecting us all with AIDS. 42 00:01:54,320 --> 00:01:57,760 These sexual excesses were in the divorce from his ex-wife 43 00:01:57,840 --> 00:01:59,400 given as a reason. 44 00:02:00,200 --> 00:02:02,200 I don't talk about him. Goes away. 45 00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:04,680 - May I ask why? - Go away! 46 00:02:04,760 --> 00:02:05,840 Mrs Gordon! 47 00:02:05,920 --> 00:02:07,400 - Oh my God! - Mrs Gordon! 48 00:02:08,400 --> 00:02:09,880 That probably means: No comment. 49 00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:12,800 Helen Gordon, formerly Helen Campbell-Black, 50 00:02:12,880 --> 00:02:14,920 had with Campbell-Black 51 00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:17,960 and two show jumping colleagues a foursome on vacation in Kenya. 52 00:02:18,040 --> 00:02:20,200 - What is a foursome? - Why don't you sleep? 53 00:02:20,280 --> 00:02:22,640 Now we reveal some inconvenient truths... 54 00:02:22,720 --> 00:02:25,240 That's another word for a quartet. 55 00:02:26,800 --> 00:02:28,480 While at the same time 56 00:02:28,560 --> 00:02:31,920 Corinium's former program director Cameron Cook seduced, 57 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:34,360 chased Mr Campbell-Black also in your own environment 58 00:02:34,440 --> 00:02:37,480 and started a relationship with Declan O'Hara's daughter Agatha, 59 00:02:37,560 --> 00:02:39,680 a woman 17 years younger. 60 00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:42,720 - Such shit. - What does that say about a man, 61 00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:46,320 the one on the young daughter his friend is hunting? 62 00:02:46,400 --> 00:02:48,440 And what does the Prime Minister think? 63 00:02:48,520 --> 00:02:51,200 from the politician, whom she once called her favorite? 64 00:02:52,160 --> 00:02:55,320 Unfortunately took from Mrs Thatcher's office no one's position. 65 00:02:56,320 --> 00:03:00,880 But this photo from 1985 shows that he probably doesn't return her respect. 66 00:03:00,960 --> 00:03:02,280 Tape off. 67 00:03:02,920 --> 00:03:04,440 They call her a milk thief. 68 00:03:04,520 --> 00:03:08,280 Not because she steals children's milk, but because she has such a milky pussy... 69 00:03:10,640 --> 00:03:12,560 The polling stations will open in ten hours. 70 00:03:12,640 --> 00:03:16,640 We ask ourselves: How can such a lusty newt like Rupert Campbell-Black 71 00:03:16,720 --> 00:03:20,680 the honorable citizens Be allowed to represent Great Britain? 72 00:03:21,280 --> 00:03:24,760 Shit! 73 00:03:36,280 --> 00:03:37,280 ELECTION SPECIAL 74 00:03:50,120 --> 00:03:51,520 FIGHT FOR TV SPOT 75 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:52,600 HEAD-TO-HEAD RACE 76 00:04:09,240 --> 00:04:11,160 According to the "RUTSHIRE CHRONICLES" by Dame Jilly Cooper 77 00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:20,960 {\an8}RESTRAIN YOURSELF, RUPERT 78 00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:25,040 WITHOUT RUBBER! CAREFUL HANDLING WITH AIDS EPIDEMIC 79 00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:30,760 POLLING STATION 80 00:04:33,680 --> 00:04:35,560 {\an8}ELECTION OF THE MEMBER OF PARLIAMENT 81 00:04:37,880 --> 00:04:38,880 {\an8}BOTCH BOX 82 00:04:41,280 --> 00:04:42,400 Here. Turn around! 83 00:04:42,480 --> 00:04:44,160 PAUL BUXTON FOR COTCHESTER 84 00:04:44,240 --> 00:04:46,000 Great. One more thing. 85 00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:53,360 Lord Baddingham! Lord Baddingham, sir! Over here! Quick, sir! 86 00:04:57,600 --> 00:04:58,680 And go! 87 00:04:58,760 --> 00:05:02,200 We are here in front of the house by Rupert Campbell Black 88 00:05:02,280 --> 00:05:03,480 Sports Minister 89 00:05:03,560 --> 00:05:06,320 and subject of explosive Revelations from yesterday. 90 00:05:06,400 --> 00:05:08,360 We will try him upon his arrival 91 00:05:08,440 --> 00:05:11,680 today on election day to elicit a few words. 92 00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:14,680 Mr. Campbell Black? Hello. Good morning, sir. Mr. Campbell Black. 93 00:05:14,760 --> 00:05:16,960 A comment about yesterday's episode of Uncensored? 94 00:05:17,040 --> 00:05:18,760 Good morning, happy election day. 95 00:05:18,840 --> 00:05:20,160 Why so disappointed? 96 00:05:20,240 --> 00:05:22,120 A comment on yesterday's broadcast? 97 00:05:24,880 --> 00:05:25,880 Morning. 98 00:05:27,320 --> 00:05:29,440 Message from party headquarters. 99 00:05:29,520 --> 00:05:32,600 Rupert's performances today will take place, not a word about the show, 100 00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:35,400 everything for mobilizing voters. 101 00:05:35,480 --> 00:05:37,440 How is he? He doesn't answer the phone. 102 00:05:37,520 --> 00:05:38,800 See for yourself. 103 00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:42,240 While the whole country today goes to the parliamentary elections, 104 00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:44,760 no one asks themselves anymore, 105 00:05:44,840 --> 00:05:48,840 whether Mrs Thatcher's Conservative government can stay in power, 106 00:05:48,920 --> 00:05:54,600 but like Rupert Campbell-Black this one should survive the devastating revelation. 107 00:05:57,800 --> 00:05:59,680 Has he been drinking all morning? 108 00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:01,280 All night long, in fact. 109 00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:02,640 He wasn't in bed. 110 00:06:02,720 --> 00:06:04,120 But it's election day. 111 00:06:04,200 --> 00:06:05,680 Yes. 112 00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:07,800 Couldn't you stop him? 113 00:06:07,880 --> 00:06:09,160 Seriously now? 114 00:06:13,320 --> 00:06:15,040 - I'll call Helen again. - God. 115 00:06:15,120 --> 00:06:18,640 - He's been trying all morning. - She'll wring my neck. 116 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:36,000 Yes. 117 00:06:36,080 --> 00:06:37,280 - Rupert, please! - Rupert. 118 00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:38,840 - What... Rupert. - I'll be right back. 119 00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:50,440 Minister, a comment about yesterday's broadcast? 120 00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:52,880 A comment on... 121 00:06:53,640 --> 00:06:55,640 Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. 122 00:07:00,200 --> 00:07:01,600 Don't forget to vote. 123 00:07:04,480 --> 00:07:06,280 Thanks. Thanks. 124 00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:20,320 Hey! 125 00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:25,600 CAMPBELL-BLACKS SEX SCANDAL 126 00:07:25,680 --> 00:07:26,680 AIDS POSTERBOY? 127 00:07:29,600 --> 00:07:31,320 I'm picking Caitlin up from school. 128 00:07:31,400 --> 00:07:32,400 OK. 129 00:07:37,240 --> 00:07:39,200 Is this journalism now, daddy? 130 00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:41,960 Destroying people’s private lives? 131 00:07:42,040 --> 00:07:44,720 Beattie is as a journalist not as brilliant as she thinks. 132 00:07:46,760 --> 00:07:49,720 A shame, that he dragged you into this. 133 00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:53,240 What does this mean for venturers? 134 00:07:54,600 --> 00:07:55,600 I don't know. 135 00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:58,360 I don't know. 136 00:08:00,760 --> 00:08:02,800 I'm disappointed, Tony. 137 00:08:02,880 --> 00:08:06,040 If you do something like that, then too in my name, not just in yours. 138 00:08:06,120 --> 00:08:09,000 We are a team, a unit. And we are strong. 139 00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:11,840 And we agreed that such tricks are over. 140 00:08:11,920 --> 00:08:15,600 I know you have your differences, but his poor wife and children. 141 00:08:16,320 --> 00:08:17,320 Who is that? 142 00:08:18,160 --> 00:08:19,320 Your gift. 143 00:08:28,600 --> 00:08:29,800 Oh, Tony. 144 00:08:31,120 --> 00:08:34,560 - Happy wedding anniversary. - It's only on Tuesday. 145 00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:36,040 Then I'll be early. 146 00:08:36,120 --> 00:08:38,000 I thought you hated peacocks. 147 00:08:38,640 --> 00:08:41,720 You always say they look like rats in ball gowns. 148 00:08:41,800 --> 00:08:44,520 The Falconry Estate has no more peacocks for ages. 149 00:08:44,600 --> 00:08:46,400 I want to improve that now. 150 00:08:46,480 --> 00:08:48,560 Mummy would be delighted. 151 00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:52,400 I will at night have to be careful with the car. 152 00:08:53,960 --> 00:08:55,800 I don't have anything for you yet. 153 00:08:56,720 --> 00:08:59,760 Come with me tonight to Nora or A Doll's House. 154 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:01,600 I'll buy you some ice cream during the break. 155 00:09:01,680 --> 00:09:04,640 You want me to do to Ibsen on election day? 156 00:09:04,720 --> 00:09:07,800 Do we just want to wait? until the polls close? 157 00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:11,200 We spend the evening together. This will be nice. 158 00:09:13,080 --> 00:09:15,240 You know how much I love theater. 159 00:09:24,560 --> 00:09:25,560 Hum, hum. 160 00:09:27,160 --> 00:09:28,240 Such beautiful birds. 161 00:09:28,320 --> 00:09:29,320 POULTRY AND BIRD NEEDS 162 00:09:29,400 --> 00:09:32,720 Helen! Helen, open the door! 163 00:09:33,880 --> 00:09:36,880 You can't forbid me to see my children! 164 00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:40,000 Helen, I swear to God I'm kicking down the door! 165 00:09:40,560 --> 00:09:41,840 Stop now! 166 00:09:42,920 --> 00:09:46,120 Would you please use your finger take it off my doorbell? 167 00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:48,880 Malise. 168 00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:50,960 Helen is at school with Tabitha. 169 00:09:51,520 --> 00:09:52,960 You probably don't even know 170 00:09:53,040 --> 00:09:56,040 something as banal as the date from your daughter's sports festival. 171 00:09:56,680 --> 00:09:59,680 - You're not running in the fathers' race? - I'm not eligible for that. 172 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:05,400 You weren't in bed, were you? 173 00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:08,120 Today I'm leaving you alone Don't preach, Malise. 174 00:10:08,200 --> 00:10:10,960 Fuck you. Fuck Helen. I have to see my children! 175 00:10:11,560 --> 00:10:13,560 I am her father. You know how it is. 176 00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:32,560 Don't you dare to talk to me about being a father. 177 00:10:33,880 --> 00:10:35,680 Get sober first. 178 00:10:39,160 --> 00:10:40,840 You didn't know what he was up to? 179 00:10:40,920 --> 00:10:43,280 I can't be alone anymore take care of mother, 180 00:10:43,360 --> 00:10:46,360 so I took some time off to bring them into a home. 181 00:10:46,440 --> 00:10:48,200 Tony was so understanding. 182 00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:50,720 He said I should take all the time necessary 183 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:52,680 although we had to prepare Uncensored. 184 00:10:52,760 --> 00:10:54,800 Understanding or calculating? 185 00:10:54,880 --> 00:10:58,280 I thought he wanted to help me. The fraud weighs heavily on me. 186 00:10:58,360 --> 00:11:01,600 You have to go back to work, find out what Tony is up to. 187 00:11:01,680 --> 00:11:04,800 But he still has what he wanted. Rupert is at the end. 188 00:11:04,880 --> 00:11:06,960 That will never be enough for Tony. 189 00:11:07,040 --> 00:11:08,880 He'll get us too. 190 00:11:11,960 --> 00:11:13,720 Do you believe? What do you mean? 191 00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:18,960 Devilish of you, all the time having a tape recorder under the bed. 192 00:11:19,040 --> 00:11:22,520 It's amazing what men do spill everything after coming. 193 00:11:23,840 --> 00:11:24,840 What can I say? 194 00:11:24,920 --> 00:11:28,240 You are real the guardian of national morale. 195 00:11:28,320 --> 00:11:29,320 You're welcome. 196 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:32,760 Your energy is like that of an atomic bomb. 197 00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:36,000 - I serve the public. - Like a public toilet. 198 00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:41,320 - Didn't you think it was a bit cruel? - You don't know what he did to me. 199 00:11:41,400 --> 00:11:44,440 Appropriate response, Joyce. Good job, everyone. 200 00:11:44,520 --> 00:11:45,920 And on we go. 201 00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:51,760 Are you hungry? 202 00:11:52,560 --> 00:11:55,520 Such a big kill always makes me very greedy. 203 00:11:55,600 --> 00:11:58,520 I would have a murderous desire for a martini and bloody steak. 204 00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:04,640 I know a small hotel, very discreet. 205 00:12:05,640 --> 00:12:08,640 We would be back more than in time for the election broadcast. 206 00:12:10,400 --> 00:12:11,920 What a tempting offer. 207 00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:16,160 But I'm afraid I'm leaving tonight to the theater with my wife. 208 00:12:24,360 --> 00:12:26,800 The blow to the head really changed you. 209 00:12:30,400 --> 00:12:31,440 Elegantly solved. 210 00:12:31,520 --> 00:12:34,640 Like stripping off a scorpion, before he stabs. 211 00:12:37,520 --> 00:12:39,560 Ok, everyone please calm down a bit. 212 00:12:41,080 --> 00:12:43,720 I regret that our first Venturer board meeting 213 00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:46,120 must take place in such a crisis. 214 00:12:46,680 --> 00:12:50,920 I ask for an orderly discussion. I know this can get emotional. 215 00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:52,880 So, Declan? 216 00:12:52,960 --> 00:12:54,240 Thanks, Freddie. 217 00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:57,160 So, the bad news first. 218 00:12:58,240 --> 00:13:00,280 The BBC canceled our Yeats documentary. 219 00:13:00,880 --> 00:13:03,640 - What? - They don't want anything to do with us. 220 00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:06,440 Also, Charles told me that Lady Gosling 221 00:13:06,520 --> 00:13:09,360 with me about the franchise application wants to speak. 222 00:13:09,440 --> 00:13:11,600 - That's not... - Is someone finally saying it? 223 00:13:11,680 --> 00:13:14,440 - Rupert should resign from the board. - Thanks. 224 00:13:14,520 --> 00:13:15,680 - No! - Now slowly. 225 00:13:15,760 --> 00:13:18,000 The IBA is led by a woman, and as a woman 226 00:13:18,080 --> 00:13:21,920 I have to say that some of the what we heard on TV yesterday, 227 00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:23,280 was difficult to bear. 228 00:13:23,360 --> 00:13:26,600 These were private statements. He didn't know there was a tape playing. 229 00:13:26,680 --> 00:13:30,400 She really liked it when he told about other women. 230 00:13:30,480 --> 00:13:34,160 If it were about anyone else, we would not also demand his resignation? 231 00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:38,520 For what values are we actually standing as a group? 232 00:13:42,680 --> 00:13:43,720 Okay, continue. 233 00:13:43,800 --> 00:13:45,200 Be careful, very slowly. 234 00:13:45,280 --> 00:13:46,360 NATIONWIDE TREND 235 00:13:46,440 --> 00:13:49,440 We proceed in the order where they come in. James? 236 00:13:49,520 --> 00:13:51,200 - First Cotchester, then... - Yes. 237 00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:53,000 - ...Rutminster... - Rutminster, Gloucester, 238 00:13:53,080 --> 00:13:55,680 Chalford and Bisley, Trend towards the Tories, blah, blah, blah... 239 00:13:55,760 --> 00:13:58,800 Beattie Johnson hosts the show... Be careful with your feet. 240 00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:01,920 And James Vereker again, of course on his trend barometer. 241 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:04,840 Everyone listen, this is Mrs Menzies-Scott, 242 00:14:04,920 --> 00:14:07,560 who will be next to Lady Gosling in the future sits on the IBA board, 243 00:14:07,640 --> 00:14:10,520 after ten years chaired the rural women's association. 244 00:14:11,440 --> 00:14:14,040 She is used to big decisions. 245 00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:15,600 Everything ready for tonight? 246 00:14:15,680 --> 00:14:18,120 Yes, hopefully there is today no big rash. 247 00:14:18,200 --> 00:14:19,200 THE DUEL 248 00:14:19,280 --> 00:14:20,280 And, Reverend Penney... 249 00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:24,120 Congratulations on yours Campbell Black disclosure report. 250 00:14:24,200 --> 00:14:28,160 "I will put an end to pride and humiliate the majesty of tyrants." 251 00:14:29,360 --> 00:14:32,960 "He who is without sin among you let him throw the first stone at her." 252 00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:34,760 Thank God Campbell-Black has himself 253 00:14:34,840 --> 00:14:38,400 for the small venturer and against the Corinium board decided. 254 00:14:38,480 --> 00:14:42,160 The IBA will be safe for the public follow and condemn his behavior. 255 00:14:42,240 --> 00:14:44,440 I'll be Mr. O'Hara speak at an appropriate time. 256 00:14:44,520 --> 00:14:46,280 I would be interested in one. 257 00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:47,440 Yes? 258 00:14:47,520 --> 00:14:49,400 As a prominent supporter the government, 259 00:14:49,480 --> 00:14:52,600 Isn't it more of an own goal? Destroying Campbell-Black's reputation 260 00:14:52,680 --> 00:14:55,400 of all evenings, before the country votes? 261 00:14:55,920 --> 00:14:59,440 Sally, as someone whose reputation is ours political system is important, 262 00:14:59,520 --> 00:15:03,320 I would say it is crucial that we make it clear to the country 263 00:15:03,400 --> 00:15:05,120 that for a behavior 264 00:15:05,200 --> 00:15:07,800 like Campbell-Black's in a modern government, 265 00:15:07,880 --> 00:15:11,120 which is of course bigger than any single member, there is no space. 266 00:15:11,200 --> 00:15:13,360 Mrs Thatcher will certainly agree. 267 00:15:14,160 --> 00:15:17,640 Rupert's humor was always razor sharp. Milk thief. 268 00:15:18,640 --> 00:15:20,120 I spit out my sherry. 269 00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:23,720 I'm sorry. 270 00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:28,040 Archie writes to me at school. 271 00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:29,440 Archie Baddingham? Caitlin. 272 00:15:29,520 --> 00:15:33,080 He sent me a mixtape! Lots of metal, but also “Caravan of Love”. 273 00:15:33,160 --> 00:15:35,320 He loves me, or he wants sex in the trailer. 274 00:15:36,480 --> 00:15:40,440 It's not just about Rupert's reputation. If it costs us orders, that's bad. 275 00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:43,560 I'm here to make television. The Yeats documentary is your baby. 276 00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:46,240 - We sell them. - Is anyone else taking it now? 277 00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:49,560 The Archbishop of Canterbury called me. 278 00:15:49,640 --> 00:15:51,880 This is a delicate situation for us 279 00:15:51,960 --> 00:15:55,480 as moral advisors on the board. 280 00:15:55,560 --> 00:15:57,080 That's all nonsense. 281 00:15:57,160 --> 00:16:00,960 Unfortunately it's all true. I was with Friedlander at the party, and believe me, 282 00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:03,120 Rupert was never monogamous in his life. 283 00:16:04,840 --> 00:16:05,840 So, until now. 284 00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:07,840 Even the foursome thing? 285 00:16:07,920 --> 00:16:09,480 It certainly sounds tiring! 286 00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:12,840 Just look at you. You're not any better. 287 00:16:12,920 --> 00:16:14,200 Giggling schoolboys! 288 00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:15,800 It takes more than 289 00:16:15,880 --> 00:16:18,200 a smear campaign, to tear us apart. 290 00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:20,000 Freddie? 291 00:16:21,080 --> 00:16:22,080 You are very quiet. 292 00:16:22,920 --> 00:16:24,640 It's difficult without Rupert. 293 00:16:25,320 --> 00:16:29,040 It's not just about image, we need also his financial participation. 294 00:16:29,680 --> 00:16:30,680 But? 295 00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:35,240 But a good reputation in public is crucial for a company. 296 00:16:35,320 --> 00:16:38,480 And Rupert has our reputation just flushed down the toilet. 297 00:16:39,480 --> 00:16:42,360 - I spoke to my father. - What did he say? 298 00:16:44,080 --> 00:16:45,240 Toshi... 299 00:16:58,640 --> 00:17:03,040 So Toshi's father takes over Rupert's share. 300 00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:07,080 But he has to know that Rupert is no longer part of the company. 301 00:17:09,120 --> 00:17:10,200 Phone, daddy. 302 00:17:10,280 --> 00:17:11,280 Not now, darling. 303 00:17:11,360 --> 00:17:13,640 Mommy's turn. She says it's urgent. 304 00:17:14,280 --> 00:17:18,080 - Go. - Just press pause, okay? 305 00:17:21,760 --> 00:17:23,800 It's okay, day. Hi darling. 306 00:17:23,880 --> 00:17:25,800 Nathalie Perrault is sick. 307 00:17:26,520 --> 00:17:28,720 - She can't perform. - I can't right now... 308 00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:31,320 I am the understudy. I'll step in for you... 309 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:34,200 ...as Nora. 310 00:17:34,840 --> 00:17:38,080 Can you come? If you start now, you can do it. 311 00:17:38,160 --> 00:17:39,520 Have you read the newspaper? 312 00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:42,320 This is Rupert. 313 00:17:42,400 --> 00:17:44,880 He's constantly stuck in some mess. 314 00:17:44,960 --> 00:17:46,360 I need you. 315 00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:49,120 - Please. - Don't worry, darling. You can do it. 316 00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:51,800 My people are tearing themselves apart here just each other. 317 00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:53,280 If I leave now, everything will fall apart. 318 00:17:53,360 --> 00:17:55,800 - You're not coming? - It's about Venturer, darling. 319 00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:03,720 But that's not dishonest. Rupert is just Rupert. 320 00:18:03,800 --> 00:18:05,600 It was always like that with him. 321 00:18:05,680 --> 00:18:07,640 I believe people find that refreshing. 322 00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:08,840 Not the archbishop! 323 00:18:08,920 --> 00:18:10,440 Doesn't he have anything better to do? 324 00:18:10,520 --> 00:18:13,880 How narrow-minded and prudish you have to be to consider this a problem? 325 00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:16,400 Not seeing that is thoughtless and ignorant. 326 00:18:16,480 --> 00:18:19,160 Aren't you a free spirit? Don't you have a past? 327 00:18:19,240 --> 00:18:21,320 Nobody has one, that Beattie would find exciting. 328 00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:23,160 She doesn't seem to visit Glyndebourne often. 329 00:18:23,240 --> 00:18:25,240 Sorry, either him or me. 330 00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:27,520 -Where has the loyalty gone? -Cameron. 331 00:18:27,600 --> 00:18:30,520 Us against the rest of the world? Shall we put up with this? 332 00:18:30,600 --> 00:18:33,920 Let's allow an attack without a fight by Tony Baddingham? 333 00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:35,680 I am for love and forgiveness, 334 00:18:35,760 --> 00:18:39,040 but I don't see how ours Franchise application that should survive. 335 00:18:39,120 --> 00:18:41,840 How about a vote? Living democracy. 336 00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:43,240 Screw democracy! 337 00:18:48,280 --> 00:18:49,800 You know what I mean. 338 00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:53,160 You can abstain, Cameron. 339 00:18:53,880 --> 00:18:55,680 Better get out while we're voting. 340 00:18:56,560 --> 00:19:00,480 Mike, Patrick, you are not on the board, so please go out too. 341 00:19:01,760 --> 00:19:04,360 That's not the Venturer, which I wanted to join. 342 00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:11,320 Rupert would go through swim in a shark tank, 343 00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:13,840 if it were the other way around, for each of you. 344 00:19:13,920 --> 00:19:15,000 Whatever you decide, 345 00:19:15,080 --> 00:19:18,720 please at least have the decency to wait until after the election, 346 00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:21,440 before you tell him that he was voted on again. 347 00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:29,600 Everything OK? 348 00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:31,440 This is a fucking mess. 349 00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:34,920 - Why are you defending him? - Because I love him. 350 00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:38,280 Because he fought for me. 351 00:19:38,360 --> 00:19:40,560 Now it's my turn to fight for him. 352 00:19:45,160 --> 00:19:46,360 OK. 353 00:19:48,120 --> 00:19:49,120 How do we do that? 354 00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:08,040 Coffee. 355 00:20:09,160 --> 00:20:10,160 No thanks. 356 00:20:11,200 --> 00:20:12,440 Wasn't a question. Sit down. 357 00:20:14,120 --> 00:20:15,200 {\an8}RESTRAIN YOURSELF, RUPERT 358 00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:17,200 {\an8}The Times, The Telegraph, 359 00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:20,080 Today, The Mail, The Mirror and The Scorpion. 360 00:20:20,160 --> 00:20:22,560 You're on every front page. 361 00:20:22,640 --> 00:20:26,640 The photographers are already camped outside and wait for you to come out. 362 00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:29,120 You dressed up nicely for my lecture. 363 00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:31,200 For heaven's sake, grow up! 364 00:20:35,720 --> 00:20:41,360 We're tired of dissolute schoolboys, who makes a joke out of everything. 365 00:20:42,120 --> 00:20:44,360 With a young hopper might that be charming, 366 00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:46,760 but for a man in his 40s 367 00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:49,160 that's just it now... 368 00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:51,840 ... pathetic. 369 00:20:51,920 --> 00:20:53,200 Understand. 370 00:20:54,280 --> 00:20:56,000 Of course Helen is pissed. 371 00:20:57,640 --> 00:20:58,800 Was to be expected. 372 00:20:58,880 --> 00:21:01,440 She knew that you were her cheated during your marriage 373 00:21:01,520 --> 00:21:05,120 but not to what extent you humiliated her. 374 00:21:05,200 --> 00:21:07,520 Thank God did you save her from me? 375 00:21:08,360 --> 00:21:11,440 We both know that I am Helen I didn't take it away from you. 376 00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:16,600 You had already broken her, for a long time before I stood her up again. 377 00:21:17,560 --> 00:21:20,120 And I won't let you that you break them again. 378 00:21:20,200 --> 00:21:21,600 Come on, Malise! 379 00:21:22,760 --> 00:21:24,520 Who doesn't have sexual sins? 380 00:21:25,680 --> 00:21:28,480 Helen likes it more harmless, but your riding stick came safely 381 00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:29,760 also already in use. 382 00:21:29,840 --> 00:21:32,160 Your daughter was in tears this morning... 383 00:21:33,080 --> 00:21:37,240 ... because she's afraid that you are dying of AIDS. 384 00:21:39,240 --> 00:21:43,200 You lost your wife and soon you will lose your children too, 385 00:21:43,280 --> 00:21:47,040 because your fucking cock you can't keep it in your pants. 386 00:21:47,120 --> 00:21:50,520 The irony of the whole thing is... 387 00:21:53,520 --> 00:21:55,000 ... that I stopped. 388 00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:58,720 What they in the show discovered was years ago. 389 00:21:58,800 --> 00:21:59,840 Oh yes? 390 00:21:59,920 --> 00:22:02,600 Sarah Stratton? Nathalie Perrault? 391 00:22:03,200 --> 00:22:04,400 Months ago. And ... 392 00:22:06,440 --> 00:22:07,800 ... those were the last ones. 393 00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:14,080 I don't want to apologize what happened... 394 00:22:16,640 --> 00:22:20,720 but I was allowed to trust Beattie with things, when I needed that, 395 00:22:20,800 --> 00:22:25,080 and I had no idea that she recorded everything to use later. 396 00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:27,640 Of course I have hers told good things about Helen, 397 00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:30,520 but they didn't send any of it. 398 00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:34,360 But don't worry, I'll get what I deserve. 399 00:22:35,840 --> 00:22:37,520 I'm losing my mandate tonight. 400 00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:40,520 Yes, very likely. 401 00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:44,040 But you're already out of it National team flew and came back. 402 00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:47,320 You learned something back then and pulled you together. 403 00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:49,800 When Timmie died... 404 00:22:54,280 --> 00:22:55,840 ... I swore to myself I would 405 00:22:55,920 --> 00:22:58,440 at least good for the young riders care in the team. 406 00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:01,280 hold you close to me, 407 00:23:01,360 --> 00:23:04,440 so that you don't keep coming back make the same mistakes. 408 00:23:06,280 --> 00:23:07,720 But that was hopeless. 409 00:23:09,160 --> 00:23:10,840 I used to blame myself 410 00:23:11,600 --> 00:23:15,320 but the damage in you was already deep, before I even joined. 411 00:23:16,080 --> 00:23:18,840 Your father was yours the worst possible role model. 412 00:23:18,920 --> 00:23:21,040 You could be a better role model. 413 00:23:21,760 --> 00:23:23,880 Your children love you, the poor little ones. 414 00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:28,200 For me? 415 00:23:30,280 --> 00:23:34,320 Put these on and vote with dignity. 416 00:23:50,920 --> 00:23:52,120 Thanks. 417 00:23:57,240 --> 00:23:59,520 I hope I can count on your vote? 418 00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:03,960 I will vote for the Liberals. 419 00:24:05,680 --> 00:24:06,840 ST JAMES THEATRE 420 00:24:12,920 --> 00:24:14,080 Nathalie doesn't play. 421 00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:15,160 Nora or A Doll's House 422 00:24:15,240 --> 00:24:17,920 "Today is the role of Nora played by Maud O'Hara." 423 00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:20,520 It's getting worse and worse. Let's go eat instead. 424 00:24:20,600 --> 00:24:23,400 No, let's give her a chance, while we're here. 425 00:24:23,480 --> 00:24:25,280 At home we would just wait. 426 00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:27,400 Darling... 427 00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:32,400 Tonight we bring you 428 00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:35,000 all live updates from the Central South West region. 429 00:24:35,080 --> 00:24:38,120 In addition, well-founded analyses of the incoming results, 430 00:24:38,200 --> 00:24:40,920 served with a good portion Corinium charm. 431 00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:43,400 Look, there's Daddy. 432 00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:46,240 But first let’s switch gears to the ITN newsroom. 433 00:24:46,320 --> 00:24:47,600 Good evening. 434 00:24:47,680 --> 00:24:50,360 The election campaign is over, the polling stations are open... 435 00:24:58,240 --> 00:25:01,560 I know I shouldn't be here. I just wanted to talk to you. 436 00:25:01,640 --> 00:25:03,920 It was a terrible day. 437 00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:08,600 When James is on TV, he can't be here, so... 438 00:25:10,160 --> 00:25:11,920 I make dinner for the children. 439 00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:15,200 Of course, I'm sorry. 440 00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:16,680 Is that a potato waffle? 441 00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:18,400 Because... 442 00:25:18,920 --> 00:25:19,920 Here. 443 00:25:20,840 --> 00:25:22,400 Haven't eaten anything all day. 444 00:25:23,400 --> 00:25:27,360 We argued about Rupert. Declan let us vote. 445 00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:29,080 How did you vote? 446 00:25:30,160 --> 00:25:32,440 - For Rupert to stay. - Good. 447 00:25:32,520 --> 00:25:34,320 Sure, he behaved terribly, 448 00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:37,400 but I always thought it was our job, to stick with him as friends 449 00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:39,760 and him again to get on the right path. 450 00:25:40,360 --> 00:25:41,880 We've all messed up sometimes. 451 00:25:44,680 --> 00:25:46,720 I knew you'd say something smart like that again. 452 00:25:47,960 --> 00:25:50,160 Val is afraid that he asks us to have a threesome. 453 00:25:50,240 --> 00:25:52,360 She has before the pampas grass ripped out. 454 00:25:54,440 --> 00:25:55,680 But Rupert stays? 455 00:25:56,280 --> 00:25:58,920 Well, Declan is the deciding factor. 456 00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:00,680 I'm gone. Felt wrong. 457 00:26:00,760 --> 00:26:02,040 Mummy! 458 00:26:04,280 --> 00:26:05,640 I'm going home. 459 00:26:10,640 --> 00:26:12,000 Do you like fish fingers? 460 00:26:14,280 --> 00:26:15,880 I never get enough of them. 461 00:26:24,800 --> 00:26:27,440 Ok, let's go upstairs to brush your teeth, please. 462 00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:29,000 - No! - No! 463 00:26:29,080 --> 00:26:32,080 Better listen to your mother, otherwise all your teeth will fall out. 464 00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:35,200 Oh no, I don't have any teeth. 465 00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:38,080 Where have my teeth gone? 466 00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:40,000 You're funny, Mr. Jones. 467 00:26:40,080 --> 00:26:41,640 Thank you, Mr. Vereker. 468 00:26:41,720 --> 00:26:43,840 - I'm Sebastian. - I'm Freddie. 469 00:26:43,920 --> 00:26:46,240 - Freddie! - Ok, now let's go upstairs! 470 00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:47,360 Come on. 471 00:26:51,120 --> 00:26:53,920 - Sebastian, how noble. - We're not posh. 472 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:55,560 You are more distinguished than me. 473 00:26:57,760 --> 00:26:59,000 Oh dear. 474 00:26:59,080 --> 00:27:01,800 - Everything OK? - Yes. 475 00:27:01,880 --> 00:27:03,760 Do you have a wheelchair? 476 00:27:03,840 --> 00:27:05,560 Well, James treats me like one. 477 00:27:05,640 --> 00:27:08,000 Something he will lean on as he gets older. 478 00:27:12,960 --> 00:27:14,360 Why did you marry him? 479 00:27:18,400 --> 00:27:19,680 Because he asked me. 480 00:27:26,040 --> 00:27:27,480 Why did you marry Valerie? 481 00:27:29,920 --> 00:27:31,240 I loved her. 482 00:27:35,880 --> 00:27:37,400 Mummy! 483 00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:40,160 I should go. 484 00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:02,360 Roar. 485 00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:29,160 Where are you? 486 00:28:37,240 --> 00:28:38,640 Goodnight, Freddie. 487 00:28:40,240 --> 00:28:41,720 Good night, Lizzie. 488 00:29:02,440 --> 00:29:04,080 Tada! 489 00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:06,640 My goodness. 490 00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:07,760 Look at you. 491 00:29:08,280 --> 00:29:10,800 Doesn't he look fantastic? 492 00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:13,640 We were there all day at the school supplier. 493 00:29:13,720 --> 00:29:15,080 A real gentleman. 494 00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:18,560 - He looks like a penguin. - Sharon, stop it! 495 00:29:21,400 --> 00:29:24,040 Look what we've done. 496 00:29:25,360 --> 00:29:26,560 Our boy. 497 00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:29,360 I'm proud of you. 498 00:29:31,200 --> 00:29:32,920 We bought everything on the list. 499 00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:35,760 cricket kit, football kit, swimming kit, 500 00:29:35,840 --> 00:29:39,400 Tennis stuff, rugby stuff, Fencing gear, everything. 501 00:29:39,480 --> 00:29:41,360 I'm proud of you. 502 00:29:41,440 --> 00:29:44,600 There won't be many Jones boys Be on the rugby team, huh, son? 503 00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:47,960 You are allowed at Eton do not visit in the first month, 504 00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:49,720 so you have to be brave, Wayne. 505 00:29:49,800 --> 00:29:52,200 Clear? No whining like a wimp. 506 00:29:52,280 --> 00:29:56,120 Most of the other guys are been away from home since they were babies. 507 00:29:56,200 --> 00:29:58,600 Sharon, come on now, don't be so lazy, 508 00:29:58,680 --> 00:30:01,200 and help me with the bags, you oaf. 509 00:30:01,280 --> 00:30:02,480 Honest. 510 00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:11,520 How can I stand it? 511 00:30:11,600 --> 00:30:14,000 as long as that cheeky little visage not visible? 512 00:30:15,200 --> 00:30:16,280 Are you sure you want this? 513 00:30:17,960 --> 00:30:19,160 It makes mom happy. 514 00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:23,920 - Can I take this off now? - Yes, my son. Go ahead. 515 00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:33,720 PARQUET and BOXES 516 00:30:33,800 --> 00:30:36,000 Wasn't she wonderful? 517 00:30:36,080 --> 00:30:37,440 A revelation. 518 00:30:38,600 --> 00:30:41,360 I believe you have found your Titania. 519 00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:43,840 I can't cast Maud O'Hara. 520 00:30:43,920 --> 00:30:45,920 Declan would be furious. 521 00:30:46,000 --> 00:30:48,240 Let's go to her, shall we? 522 00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:56,600 Congratulations! The woman of the hour. 523 00:30:58,000 --> 00:31:00,400 More like a woman of the last half hour. 524 00:31:01,120 --> 00:31:04,960 I didn't expect that. That's really nice. I already thought 525 00:31:05,040 --> 00:31:06,840 I'm not getting any visitors today. 526 00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:09,080 It's a shame that no one from the family was there. 527 00:31:09,160 --> 00:31:10,680 - I don't think so. -Tony! 528 00:31:10,760 --> 00:31:11,960 Isn't he terrible? 529 00:31:12,480 --> 00:31:16,080 I'm not complaining. The wine is excellent. 530 00:31:16,160 --> 00:31:19,000 Otherwise there is just the sticky table at Coach and Horses. 531 00:31:19,080 --> 00:31:20,880 But not for long. 532 00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:23,000 - Tony, tell her. - Yes. 533 00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:25,040 Monica has an idea. 534 00:31:25,920 --> 00:31:27,640 And I think they're pretty good. 535 00:31:27,720 --> 00:31:29,960 I would like to offer you a role 536 00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:33,360 in Corinium's production from A Midsummer Night's Dream. 537 00:31:33,440 --> 00:31:36,920 The main role: Titania, Queen of the Fairies. 538 00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:39,840 I think Maud knows Shakespeare, darling. 539 00:31:39,920 --> 00:31:42,960 It is our prestige project, filmed at Corinium, 540 00:31:43,040 --> 00:31:45,240 with an audience on site, broadcast on the network, 541 00:31:45,320 --> 00:31:49,600 followed by a video release for schools across the country. 542 00:31:49,680 --> 00:31:51,280 This reaches a large audience. 543 00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:53,520 Oh god... 544 00:31:54,600 --> 00:31:57,040 I mean, thank you. Thanks. 545 00:31:57,880 --> 00:32:00,480 Of course I first have to talk to my... 546 00:32:00,560 --> 00:32:01,880 your husband. Yes, of course. 547 00:32:02,480 --> 00:32:04,560 I wanted to say with my agent. 548 00:32:06,360 --> 00:32:08,280 Oh, Ibsen would be proud. 549 00:32:09,760 --> 00:32:10,920 Thanks. 550 00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:32,600 Get everyone ready for the live broadcast. 551 00:32:32,680 --> 00:32:38,760 Countdown to handover to ITN in five, four, three... 552 00:32:38,840 --> 00:32:39,840 {\an8}RECORDING 553 00:32:39,920 --> 00:32:41,920 ELECTION SPECIAL 554 00:32:42,000 --> 00:32:43,000 Good evening. 555 00:32:43,080 --> 00:32:45,600 Welcome to the election special the Cotswold Round. 556 00:32:45,680 --> 00:32:46,680 {\an8}BOTCH BOX 557 00:32:46,760 --> 00:32:49,760 We're switching gears now to our outdoor unit in Cotchester. 558 00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:52,720 As I'm hearing now... 559 00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:56,760 Yes, Paul Stratton will retain his seat for the conservatives. 560 00:32:56,840 --> 00:32:59,920 I want all of mine Thank supporters, 561 00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:05,520 my helpers in the constituency and Samantha, my great secretary. 562 00:33:05,600 --> 00:33:08,040 And of course I thank you 563 00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:10,720 my daughters Penelope and Cressida. 564 00:33:10,800 --> 00:33:15,920 My father, Crown Attorney Desmond Stratton, for his wise advice during this election campaign, 565 00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:20,600 and finally my schnauzer Sultan, for being there. 566 00:33:21,280 --> 00:33:22,920 Good boy, Sultan. Thank you. 567 00:33:23,520 --> 00:33:26,120 Paul Stratton holds Cotchester for the conservatives. 568 00:33:26,200 --> 00:33:28,120 Now everyone is looking to Chalford and Bisley, 569 00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:30,560 where Rupert Campbell-Black's seat is on the brink 570 00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:32,840 after yesterday's shocking revelation. 571 00:33:32,920 --> 00:33:34,600 To James and his trend barometer. 572 00:33:34,680 --> 00:33:38,200 Paul Stratton maintains his majority with over 15,000 votes. 573 00:33:38,280 --> 00:33:40,480 A clear victory. 574 00:33:40,560 --> 00:33:43,000 Oh no, not like that... No, not that... No, no... 575 00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:44,720 I'll keep it simple. 576 00:33:46,120 --> 00:33:48,360 Without the right trend the thing is no good. 577 00:33:48,440 --> 00:33:49,440 Beattie. 578 00:33:51,120 --> 00:33:52,240 Cheer up, okay? 579 00:33:52,320 --> 00:33:55,360 Act like it's nothing, then people believe that too. 580 00:33:55,440 --> 00:33:59,880 However it turns out, It was an honor to be with you... 581 00:33:59,960 --> 00:34:02,120 It's okay, Gerald, don't overdo it. 582 00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:04,840 Ready? 583 00:34:06,480 --> 00:34:07,560 Ready. 584 00:34:25,400 --> 00:34:27,280 Chalford and Bisley are about to announce. 585 00:34:27,360 --> 00:34:29,200 Stand by for external switching. 586 00:34:30,240 --> 00:34:33,040 We're switching gears now to Chalford and Bisley for the announcement 587 00:34:33,120 --> 00:34:34,680 today's results. 588 00:34:34,760 --> 00:34:36,720 You're back, Tony. 589 00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:38,560 I won't miss this. 590 00:34:39,960 --> 00:34:41,800 And now the external switch. 591 00:34:44,040 --> 00:34:47,560 As returning officer for the constituency Chalford and Bisley 592 00:34:47,640 --> 00:34:48,720 I hereby declare, 593 00:34:48,800 --> 00:34:52,880 that the total number of votes for each candidate is as follows. 594 00:34:52,960 --> 00:34:59,400 Michael Seaborne, Labor candidate: 5,342. 595 00:35:00,440 --> 00:35:04,760 David Edwards, known as Baa Baa Woolly Ramsbottom, 596 00:35:04,840 --> 00:35:07,720 Cotswold Loony Party: 283. 597 00:35:09,960 --> 00:35:11,200 Yes! 598 00:35:11,280 --> 00:35:13,840 Margaret Baldwin, Liberal Party. 599 00:35:13,920 --> 00:35:17,200 24,292. 600 00:35:19,000 --> 00:35:22,560 Rupert Campbell Black, Conservative Party. 601 00:35:26,960 --> 00:35:30,240 36,272. 602 00:35:31,120 --> 00:35:32,240 Wow! 603 00:35:32,320 --> 00:35:35,280 I hereby declare that Rupert Campbell Black 604 00:35:35,360 --> 00:35:39,080 properly to the MP elected for Chalford and Bisley... 605 00:35:40,720 --> 00:35:44,960 ... and the seat for the Conservative Party holds. 606 00:35:45,040 --> 00:35:47,080 Conservatives hold Chalford and Bisley 607 00:35:47,160 --> 00:35:48,560 Up, up. 608 00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:54,200 - We did it! - Well done, Gerry! 609 00:35:59,560 --> 00:36:01,240 Thank you. Thank you all. 610 00:36:01,320 --> 00:36:04,440 I will really do anything to earn your trust. 611 00:36:05,920 --> 00:36:07,040 Forward. 612 00:36:07,120 --> 00:36:09,240 - Forward! - Rupert Campbell-Black, 613 00:36:09,320 --> 00:36:12,040 again as a member of parliament elected for Chalford and Bisley, 614 00:36:12,120 --> 00:36:15,480 kisses his girlfriend, TV manager Cameron Cook. 615 00:36:18,080 --> 00:36:21,920 {\an8}If you are just switching on now: So far there are 88 results. 616 00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:25,880 He has just fallen out of favor fallen sports minister 617 00:36:25,960 --> 00:36:29,320 Rupert Campbell-Black surprising Chalford and Bisley held... 618 00:36:46,240 --> 00:36:48,080 It was announced. 619 00:36:48,160 --> 00:36:49,440 He won, right? 620 00:36:52,320 --> 00:36:53,880 How does he do that? 621 00:36:53,960 --> 00:36:58,040 - He's still the Olympic hero. - Not for those who really know him. 622 00:36:59,120 --> 00:37:01,400 He even has you on his side. Look. 623 00:37:01,480 --> 00:37:05,240 -He needs a father figure sometimes. - Or you need a son. 624 00:37:07,680 --> 00:37:09,680 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 625 00:37:10,920 --> 00:37:14,200 Sometimes I think you see Rupert through rose-colored glasses, 626 00:37:14,280 --> 00:37:16,320 because you miss Timmie. 627 00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:20,280 And that hurts because I'm sure that Rupert is not a replacement. 628 00:37:20,360 --> 00:37:23,800 Rupert is dangerous for everyone, when he freaks out. 629 00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:26,480 Good thing he kept his seat. 630 00:37:26,560 --> 00:37:28,600 If Rupert were a woman, 631 00:37:28,680 --> 00:37:31,880 he would be tarred and feathered and on the hair 632 00:37:31,960 --> 00:37:34,000 - grind through Cotchester. - God, Helen. 633 00:37:34,080 --> 00:37:37,640 He gets a seat in parliament. I just get the shame. 634 00:37:37,720 --> 00:37:41,720 I'm the stupid one because I was his wife and am the mother of his children. 635 00:37:41,800 --> 00:37:46,560 No matter what I do, I always stay the disgraced ex of the Olympic hero! 636 00:37:51,480 --> 00:37:52,640 Come here. 637 00:38:00,600 --> 00:38:02,200 What happened to you in Kenya? 638 00:38:04,840 --> 00:38:05,920 What? 639 00:38:06,920 --> 00:38:10,560 You never said anything about Kenya. What happened to you there? 640 00:38:12,320 --> 00:38:13,920 No, I... I didn't. 641 00:38:16,720 --> 00:38:19,480 I knew Otherwise you will think differently about me. 642 00:38:21,480 --> 00:38:22,480 You already do. 643 00:38:23,960 --> 00:38:26,160 You're sleeping in the guest room today. 644 00:38:29,480 --> 00:38:30,480 In which? 645 00:39:11,080 --> 00:39:12,400 What the hell is that? 646 00:39:13,120 --> 00:39:14,760 This is the "Chicken Song". 647 00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:16,200 What? 648 00:39:16,280 --> 00:39:17,280 By Spitting Image. 649 00:39:17,360 --> 00:39:19,000 - A parody. - On what? 650 00:39:19,080 --> 00:39:20,240 Rupert! 651 00:39:22,560 --> 00:39:24,680 - Okay, come on. We're going home - What? 652 00:39:24,760 --> 00:39:27,720 I just fucking won the election! 653 00:39:27,800 --> 00:39:32,160 Actually, Mrs Thatcher has just won the damn election. 654 00:39:32,240 --> 00:39:34,720 darling, I need to talk to you about Venturer. 655 00:39:34,800 --> 00:39:36,600 No no no. We celebrate. 656 00:39:36,680 --> 00:39:38,960 Venturer won the election! 657 00:39:41,840 --> 00:39:42,840 I'm going to bed. 658 00:39:44,200 --> 00:39:45,440 Good, good, good. 659 00:39:45,520 --> 00:39:47,600 - I'm coming with you. - No no no. 660 00:39:48,160 --> 00:39:49,160 Celebrate quietly. 661 00:39:50,360 --> 00:39:51,760 It's your party. 662 00:40:13,920 --> 00:40:15,440 Take that, Dimbleby. 663 00:40:16,280 --> 00:40:18,800 As always, the British people voted for Mummy. 664 00:40:18,880 --> 00:40:20,960 How about we go party? 665 00:40:21,040 --> 00:40:23,040 - You and me? - Why not? 666 00:40:23,120 --> 00:40:25,320 I look under the bed for tape recorders. 667 00:40:27,320 --> 00:40:28,320 All right. 668 00:40:28,400 --> 00:40:29,400 - Really? - No. 669 00:40:29,480 --> 00:40:30,680 Listen... 670 00:40:30,760 --> 00:40:31,880 WARDROBE 1 671 00:40:31,960 --> 00:40:34,720 I thought you were great, James. 672 00:40:38,200 --> 00:40:39,200 Hey people. 673 00:40:39,280 --> 00:40:41,040 Who wants to celebrate? 674 00:40:41,120 --> 00:40:42,840 A drink would still do. 675 00:40:44,400 --> 00:40:46,680 Daysee, where are you going today? 676 00:40:46,760 --> 00:40:48,760 Nightcap with the team at the Cotchester Arms. 677 00:40:48,840 --> 00:40:50,520 What, cider with the camera guys? 678 00:40:50,600 --> 00:40:53,280 I have Bolly in my dressing room. 679 00:40:53,360 --> 00:40:54,480 No thanks. 680 00:40:54,560 --> 00:40:56,720 Come on, Daysee. Why so sad? 681 00:40:56,800 --> 00:40:59,240 - You used to like to party. - Fuck off. 682 00:41:00,400 --> 00:41:01,640 I should fuck off. 683 00:41:07,760 --> 00:41:08,760 Deirdre? 684 00:41:08,840 --> 00:41:10,560 Yes, James? 685 00:41:11,160 --> 00:41:12,640 Please call me a taxi, okay? 686 00:41:20,200 --> 00:41:22,480 ... because he has his seat in Chalford and Bisley 687 00:41:22,560 --> 00:41:24,840 defended with an overwhelming majority. 688 00:41:27,240 --> 00:41:28,240 Where is Rupert? 689 00:41:28,320 --> 00:41:30,560 At the party where he makes a fool of himself. 690 00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:35,920 What's going on now? 691 00:41:36,000 --> 00:41:37,560 Paul won his seat. 692 00:41:39,360 --> 00:41:41,160 Do you want to be his wife or not? 693 00:41:41,240 --> 00:41:44,600 If so, stop crying and go back to your house. 694 00:41:46,360 --> 00:41:49,480 - You can't talk to me like that. - Yes, I can. 695 00:42:02,960 --> 00:42:04,880 This thrill, the nation the result 696 00:42:04,960 --> 00:42:06,720 to proclaim their little crosses. 697 00:42:06,800 --> 00:42:08,640 You were brilliant. 698 00:42:08,720 --> 00:42:13,000 And that stupid Beattie Johnson takes all the credit. 699 00:42:14,440 --> 00:42:16,640 Maybe there will be next year a larger pendulum. 700 00:42:16,720 --> 00:42:17,920 Yes. 701 00:42:20,160 --> 00:42:21,440 Speaking of pendulums... 702 00:42:24,160 --> 00:42:26,960 Looks like my elective erection wants play again. 703 00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:28,720 Yes, that's right. 704 00:42:37,200 --> 00:42:38,360 I brushed my teeth. 705 00:42:39,440 --> 00:42:41,320 Good. Then just sex. 706 00:42:41,400 --> 00:42:42,440 OK. 707 00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:46,600 Come on. 708 00:42:47,600 --> 00:42:49,800 You know, the people really underestimate me. 709 00:42:49,880 --> 00:42:51,920 I would be amazed if venturer me after today 710 00:42:52,000 --> 00:42:55,320 doesn't want to poach. Or better yet, recruits me as a mole. 711 00:42:56,120 --> 00:42:57,600 I would be a good double agent. 712 00:42:58,200 --> 00:42:59,760 Open up a little more, Lizzie. 713 00:42:59,840 --> 00:43:00,840 I'm not coming in. 714 00:43:02,320 --> 00:43:04,680 James "The Mole" Vereker. So. 715 00:43:05,560 --> 00:43:06,560 That's all right, Lizzie. 716 00:43:06,640 --> 00:43:08,240 Well-behaved. Open the building. 717 00:43:10,680 --> 00:43:14,080 I am a mole and live in a burrow 718 00:43:14,160 --> 00:43:16,760 I am a mole and live in a burrow 719 00:43:16,840 --> 00:43:19,080 I am a mole and live in a... 720 00:43:22,000 --> 00:43:23,280 ...hole 721 00:43:31,360 --> 00:43:32,360 Lizzie. 722 00:43:35,920 --> 00:43:39,120 I am a kite and you are my bollard. 723 00:43:57,240 --> 00:43:58,960 Darling. You are home. 724 00:44:00,920 --> 00:44:03,440 Congratulations. You won. 725 00:44:03,520 --> 00:44:04,520 Made breakfast. 726 00:44:04,600 --> 00:44:07,240 You must be exhausted after all the celebrating. 727 00:44:10,360 --> 00:44:14,680 I'm so sorry because of our stupid argument. 728 00:44:15,920 --> 00:44:17,760 It was just my hormones. 729 00:44:17,840 --> 00:44:19,480 You couldn't do anything about it. 730 00:44:19,560 --> 00:44:21,240 - But the baby? - Your baby. 731 00:44:22,960 --> 00:44:25,240 I was so mean to you, Paulie. 732 00:44:25,320 --> 00:44:27,960 I just want, that we are a small family. 733 00:44:29,920 --> 00:44:32,200 I'm so happy. 734 00:44:38,440 --> 00:44:39,640 Do you know, 735 00:44:40,400 --> 00:44:44,800 some women find that the second trimester... 736 00:44:46,360 --> 00:44:49,040 ... the hottest three months of their lives. 737 00:45:06,600 --> 00:45:08,800 Gerald. I was lying in bed. 738 00:45:09,480 --> 00:45:11,600 Well, I... wanted to lay down with you. 739 00:45:23,560 --> 00:45:27,120 It's unbelievable that Rupert really did that has managed. He is Superman. 740 00:45:27,200 --> 00:45:28,840 Should I be jealous? 741 00:45:28,920 --> 00:45:31,720 I would do anything for Rupert, but I'm in love with you. 742 00:45:32,240 --> 00:45:33,360 Into you and Mrs Thatcher. 743 00:45:34,920 --> 00:45:36,520 I think my erection is gone. 744 00:45:36,600 --> 00:45:38,000 Oh no. Really? 745 00:45:38,080 --> 00:45:40,480 just stop, to talk about Mrs Thatcher. 746 00:45:40,560 --> 00:45:41,560 I'm sorry. 747 00:45:42,880 --> 00:45:45,040 You know I want to go to Parliament, Charles. 748 00:45:45,120 --> 00:45:47,440 That's why you're getting married a woman you don't love 749 00:45:47,520 --> 00:45:50,760 and throw away all your principles, to work for a party, 750 00:45:50,840 --> 00:45:55,280 that denies gay men the right to be considered human. 751 00:45:55,360 --> 00:45:57,280 I'm going to change things. 752 00:45:58,440 --> 00:45:59,760 From the inside out. 753 00:46:03,320 --> 00:46:05,120 - Really? - Why not? 754 00:46:15,880 --> 00:46:20,720 Gerald congratulated me last night. I am the perfect politician's wife. 755 00:46:21,880 --> 00:46:23,400 Gerald was very drunk. 756 00:46:24,720 --> 00:46:26,920 What is that even supposed to look like? 757 00:46:27,000 --> 00:46:28,520 Swallow and shut up? 758 00:46:28,600 --> 00:46:30,600 That's not your style, is it? 759 00:46:35,240 --> 00:46:39,080 You know I had your back, because that was just unfair. 760 00:46:40,160 --> 00:46:42,480 I can't deny what Beattie said. 761 00:46:44,440 --> 00:46:45,800 It's all true. 762 00:46:45,880 --> 00:46:47,120 You don't have to. 763 00:46:48,720 --> 00:46:50,440 You are more than all of that. 764 00:46:53,320 --> 00:46:54,720 And I love you. 765 00:47:05,600 --> 00:47:07,000 I go out with the dogs. 766 00:47:13,520 --> 00:47:16,280 I adore you. Thank you for sticking with me. 767 00:47:26,720 --> 00:47:27,920 Yes! 768 00:47:28,000 --> 00:47:29,120 Yes! 769 00:47:29,200 --> 00:47:31,160 Do you want to leave me alone? 770 00:47:32,320 --> 00:47:35,120 Okay, okay, okay. 771 00:47:38,920 --> 00:47:42,720 Downing Street was on the phone at the moment. Mrs Thatcher wants to see you. 772 00:47:57,200 --> 00:48:00,880 I know it bothers you, darling, but no matter what you think of Rupert... 773 00:48:00,960 --> 00:48:03,360 I could do all of that not at all without your help. 774 00:48:04,640 --> 00:48:05,960 All your ideas. 775 00:48:06,040 --> 00:48:08,120 You are my secret weapon. 776 00:48:08,200 --> 00:48:11,680 The same goes the other way around, darling. We are a team. 777 00:48:12,200 --> 00:48:15,960 I think we're out of this trouble emerged stronger than ever. 778 00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:18,320 Look at him. Who does he actually think he is? 779 00:48:18,400 --> 00:48:19,800 Damn Sir Lancelot? 780 00:48:19,880 --> 00:48:21,000 Sir Fickalot. 781 00:48:26,920 --> 00:48:30,800 You end this feud with Rupert now, yes? 782 00:48:32,200 --> 00:48:33,480 Please. 783 00:48:34,880 --> 00:48:37,360 I will end the feud with Rupert. 784 00:48:50,640 --> 00:48:52,040 How did it go with your mother? 785 00:48:52,120 --> 00:48:54,240 - Did she call? - She didn't call. 786 00:48:56,360 --> 00:48:58,960 - Eggs, daddy? - No, I can't get anything down, day. 787 00:49:01,040 --> 00:49:03,640 Mrs Thatcher's third landslide win. 788 00:49:03,720 --> 00:49:07,760 Poor Mr Kinnock should give up. She will probably remain prime minister forever. 789 00:49:07,840 --> 00:49:09,560 Change is hard 790 00:49:09,640 --> 00:49:13,280 and scare people so you stay with the status quo. 791 00:49:14,360 --> 00:49:15,560 How depressing. 792 00:49:17,240 --> 00:49:19,440 - This is Freddie. - Are you going to talk to Rupert? 793 00:49:21,160 --> 00:49:22,600 What have you decided? 794 00:49:26,000 --> 00:49:28,360 I mean if he has the choice won, then... 795 00:49:30,200 --> 00:49:31,200 You should know: 796 00:49:31,280 --> 00:49:33,800 Downing Street a press conference begins. 797 00:49:33,880 --> 00:49:35,760 Let's hear what Maggie has to say. 798 00:49:35,840 --> 00:49:37,920 Not Mrs Thatcher. It's Rupert. 799 00:49:44,760 --> 00:49:46,360 Thank you, gentlemen and ladies. 800 00:49:47,480 --> 00:49:51,160 I spoke to Mrs Thatcher the day before yesterday about the episode ofUncensored 801 00:49:51,240 --> 00:49:55,240 and the response it triggered. 802 00:49:55,920 --> 00:49:59,640 I said I took my seat I won the election, 803 00:49:59,720 --> 00:50:02,880 but I don't want to that the scandal surrounding me 804 00:50:02,960 --> 00:50:04,320 distracts us from our work. 805 00:50:05,640 --> 00:50:10,400 Therefore, it is with deep regret my resignation as a member of parliament 806 00:50:10,480 --> 00:50:14,640 and ministers submitted. The Prime Minister accepted this. 807 00:50:16,920 --> 00:50:19,400 A further explanation follows, gentlemen. 808 00:50:19,480 --> 00:50:20,480 Thank you very much. 809 00:50:21,080 --> 00:50:23,400 You've probably won after all, my lord. 810 00:50:30,520 --> 00:50:34,880 One down, three left. 811 00:50:45,960 --> 00:50:46,960 OK, tell me. 812 00:50:48,520 --> 00:50:49,600 Should I go? 813 00:51:00,760 --> 00:51:01,960 It was my pleasure. 814 00:52:11,280 --> 00:52:13,280 Subtitles by: Dennis Paluch