1 00:00:00,840 --> 00:00:16,800 Welcome to my lecture, and welcome to my lecture, and 2 00:00:16,800 --> 00:00:17,080 welcome 3 00:00:17,080 --> 00:00:27,140 to 4 00:00:27,140 --> 00:00:31,520 my lecture, and 5 00:00:31,520 --> 00:01:00,940 welcome to 6 00:01:00,940 --> 00:01:09,040 my lecture, and welcome to my lecture. 7 00:01:09,700 --> 00:01:10,660 lays on the buses. 8 00:01:10,920 --> 00:01:12,580 Marvellous, we're not going to carry any more passengers. 9 00:01:13,960 --> 00:01:15,680 I tell you what, they're going to get rid of him. 10 00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:17,280 Sweet. 11 00:01:18,480 --> 00:01:23,080 The company in their infinite wisdom have decided that each bus will have two 12 00:01:23,080 --> 00:01:25,220 -way radio installed in its cab. 13 00:01:25,320 --> 00:01:27,000 What's that got to do with us conductors then? 14 00:01:27,500 --> 00:01:30,480 Well if anything happens to the driver, the conductor will still be there to 15 00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:31,760 get through to the base, won't he? 16 00:01:32,420 --> 00:01:37,880 Right, and the first bus to have one installed will be your number 11, the bus 17 00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:38,840 to the cemetery gates. 18 00:01:38,980 --> 00:01:40,200 Well why pick on us then? 19 00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:44,640 Because a time and motion survey has shown it to be the slowest and most 20 00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:46,260 unpunctual in the whole town, that's why. 21 00:01:47,500 --> 00:01:50,780 Oh blimey mate, you should see the traffic from the high street to the cemetery 22 00:01:50,780 --> 00:01:51,980 gates, it's packed mate. 23 00:01:52,100 --> 00:01:55,360 It's got nothing to do with it, the survey shows that the hearses are getting 24 00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:56,040 there before you. 25 00:01:58,320 --> 00:02:00,820 Blimey mate, they don't have to stop to pick up passengers. 26 00:02:02,400 --> 00:02:04,620 Well only one and he couldn't care less where he's going. 27 00:02:07,780 --> 00:02:08,800 Listen to this will you? 28 00:02:09,660 --> 00:02:12,720 Each bus will be fitted with a two-way radio receiver like this. 29 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:13,380 Thank you Miss Woodhall. 30 00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:17,760 Now then, there will be a central control in my office there, manned by Miss 31 00:02:17,760 --> 00:02:20,120 Woodhall, who will serve directly under me. 32 00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:26,180 Now this is the basic two-way receiver. 33 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:28,100 You have to learn the controls. 34 00:02:28,220 --> 00:02:29,840 That is the on position, that is the off. 35 00:02:30,100 --> 00:02:31,520 That's known as the on-off button, right? 36 00:02:31,740 --> 00:02:33,660 I'm glad you told us that, otherwise we wouldn't have known. 37 00:02:36,580 --> 00:02:46,520 Now then, when you hear me call, you will acknowledge by lifting up the 38 00:02:46,520 --> 00:02:49,180 microphone here and pressing the button on the left there like that. 39 00:02:49,500 --> 00:02:53,260 So, right, now before you can use this apparatus, you have to learn a code to 40 00:02:53,260 --> 00:02:54,100 identify yourself. 41 00:02:54,180 --> 00:02:55,120 Well what code's that then? 42 00:02:55,240 --> 00:02:56,680 Just a moment Miss Woodhall, thank you. 43 00:02:57,460 --> 00:03:02,640 Now then, this code here is used to avoid any confusion whatsoever over the 44 00:03:02,640 --> 00:03:02,860 air. 45 00:03:03,940 --> 00:03:06,980 A for Abel, B for Bertie, C for Charlie. 46 00:03:07,460 --> 00:03:09,560 Sorry sir, C only stands for one thing. 47 00:03:09,700 --> 00:03:09,980 What's that? 48 00:03:09,980 --> 00:03:19,780 B for Georgie, H for Otel, I for Idle, that's you two, 49 00:03:19,960 --> 00:03:24,540 J for Juliet, K for Katie. 50 00:03:25,380 --> 00:03:29,140 Oh Sam, you have to go on repeating those words over and over again. 51 00:03:29,580 --> 00:03:32,640 Mind you, I find it a lot more stimulating than his usual conversation. 52 00:03:33,060 --> 00:03:34,860 Well I don't know why he has to learn them all. 53 00:03:35,100 --> 00:03:38,920 I've told you before mum, we're having radio control in the cabs and I've got 54 00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:40,000 to learn this code. 55 00:03:40,580 --> 00:03:42,200 Oh for instance, you don't understand it do you? 56 00:03:42,340 --> 00:03:42,440 No. 57 00:03:42,440 --> 00:03:44,740 If I was referring to Olive, I'd call her Oscar. 58 00:03:45,120 --> 00:03:48,240 Well I don't think that's very nice, calling Olive Oscar. 59 00:03:48,560 --> 00:03:50,480 I don't know, I think it suits her rather well. 60 00:03:53,060 --> 00:03:55,040 Look, you haven't got it at all have you? 61 00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:55,300 No. 62 00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:59,380 Look, her name's Olive and it's spelt O-L-I-V-E, right? 63 00:03:59,540 --> 00:03:59,940 Right. 64 00:03:59,980 --> 00:04:03,720 So in the code I'd say Oscar, Love, Idle, Victor, Easy. 65 00:04:04,380 --> 00:04:04,600 Eh? 66 00:04:04,740 --> 00:04:05,740 Sounds most appropriate. 67 00:04:05,740 --> 00:04:06,960 Oh shut up. 68 00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:08,740 What would Arthur be? 69 00:04:08,940 --> 00:04:10,000 Do you really want me to tell you? 70 00:04:10,180 --> 00:04:10,560 Stan? 71 00:04:11,040 --> 00:04:15,820 No, let me see then, A-R-T-H, now he would be Abel Romeo. 72 00:04:16,279 --> 00:04:16,640 Him? 73 00:04:16,880 --> 00:04:17,740 Abel Romeo? 74 00:04:18,560 --> 00:04:20,240 That's a laugh for a start. 75 00:04:20,620 --> 00:04:23,520 Yeah well it's rather difficult being a Romeo when you happen to be married to 76 00:04:23,520 --> 00:04:24,780 a woman who happens to be an Oscar. 77 00:04:26,940 --> 00:04:30,400 Come on Stan, love, eat up, your stew is getting all cold. 78 00:04:30,440 --> 00:04:34,100 Anyway, I think the whole thing is rather childish. 79 00:04:34,100 --> 00:04:35,180 Bussman's Code? 80 00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:38,260 I mean why don't you just learn to speak the message properly? 81 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:42,980 Because it would easily be misunderstood. 82 00:04:44,420 --> 00:04:51,360 I mean, if I had to report a bad fog, I would say, here we are, Thursday, 83 00:04:52,300 --> 00:04:59,480 rightly Abel's out, oh, really Oscar's off to go and do yo-yo, and that makes 84 00:04:59,480 --> 00:05:00,180 it clear. 85 00:05:01,140 --> 00:05:04,580 What a lot of rot you do talk, I didn't catch a single word of that. 86 00:05:05,300 --> 00:05:06,280 Oh well, shut up. 87 00:05:07,660 --> 00:05:13,300 Let me get on with it, here we are, now then, R for Romeo, S for sugar, T for 88 00:05:13,300 --> 00:05:15,400 er, I can't see that here. 89 00:05:15,680 --> 00:05:16,620 T for tomato. 90 00:05:18,440 --> 00:05:18,840 Tomato? 91 00:05:19,060 --> 00:05:20,520 I can't remember tomato in it. 92 00:05:20,540 --> 00:05:24,280 Tomato ketchup mate, you've also got a bit of G for gravy and S for stew. 93 00:05:26,260 --> 00:05:28,120 What does all that mean then? 94 00:05:28,360 --> 00:05:29,440 He's a messy eater. 95 00:05:33,080 --> 00:05:36,760 It's T for tango, that's it, I knew it wasn't tomato, T for tango. 96 00:05:36,980 --> 00:05:38,360 Now I'm going to practise on you now mum. 97 00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:38,800 I don't like it. 98 00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:39,760 Now I'm going to ask for it. 99 00:05:39,800 --> 00:05:43,280 Mum, would you mind passing me the Romeo Oscar love loves? 100 00:05:43,280 --> 00:05:43,660 Eh? 101 00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:45,120 You ain't got it, see? 102 00:05:45,300 --> 00:05:45,580 No. 103 00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:45,880 Have you? 104 00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:46,380 No. 105 00:05:46,500 --> 00:05:48,740 Romeo Oscar love loves, that's the roles. 106 00:05:49,180 --> 00:05:50,940 Oh, well I don't think that's decent. 107 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:55,460 I'm not going into Baker's asking for that anyway, I don't see what difference 108 00:05:55,460 --> 00:05:57,100 this is going to make to the bus service. 109 00:05:57,300 --> 00:05:59,080 Well they couldn't be much worse than they are now. 110 00:05:59,460 --> 00:06:02,540 I mean you stand there for an hour in a queue, then you get a dozen buses all 111 00:06:02,540 --> 00:06:03,620 following one behind the other. 112 00:06:03,840 --> 00:06:06,240 Yeah, well there's a reason for that mate, and it's very technical. 113 00:06:06,480 --> 00:06:06,960 Eh, what's that? 114 00:06:07,300 --> 00:06:09,220 Well the bloke in front's the only one who knows the way. 115 00:06:11,660 --> 00:06:14,240 You may laugh mate, you may laugh. 116 00:06:14,600 --> 00:06:16,740 I mean you're the driver, you always get a seat, don't you? 117 00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:17,060 Yeah. 118 00:06:17,460 --> 00:06:19,260 I mean you're crammed in there in a rush, eh? 119 00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:21,140 You're stacked together like cattle. 120 00:06:21,300 --> 00:06:22,640 Oh yes, he's right love. 121 00:06:22,700 --> 00:06:24,660 Packed like sardines, it's not decent. 122 00:06:25,020 --> 00:06:27,980 Well only the other day a man tried to pinch me. 123 00:06:29,060 --> 00:06:29,460 Eh? 124 00:06:30,140 --> 00:06:31,500 You should have gone for him Mark. 125 00:06:31,620 --> 00:06:32,320 Oh I did. 126 00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:34,960 He said he was fumbling for his change. 127 00:06:37,260 --> 00:06:39,520 Wasn't his change he was fumbling for? 128 00:06:40,920 --> 00:06:42,000 That's quite right. 129 00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:43,800 There was a man on the number nine bus. 130 00:06:44,280 --> 00:06:45,240 He kept touching me. 131 00:06:45,380 --> 00:06:46,420 He was after me alright. 132 00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:47,740 I had witnesses. 133 00:06:48,620 --> 00:06:50,820 You should have reported him, he could have got three months. 134 00:06:51,060 --> 00:06:54,600 Well if I'd been after her, he'd have been found guilty but insane. 135 00:06:56,380 --> 00:06:58,520 You should have gone plain to the conductor. 136 00:06:58,920 --> 00:07:00,760 He was a real nasty type. 137 00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:04,940 He put his hand down on the seat just as I was about to sit down and I sat down 138 00:07:04,940 --> 00:07:05,320 on it. 139 00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:06,940 It was a terrible shock. 140 00:07:07,240 --> 00:07:07,860 I bet it was. 141 00:07:08,640 --> 00:07:09,920 Must have broken his wrist. 142 00:07:10,860 --> 00:07:12,100 Move, move, move. 143 00:07:12,340 --> 00:07:13,060 Stop, stop. 144 00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:16,260 Don't start on each other, leave your brother alone. 145 00:07:16,260 --> 00:07:18,240 Pick on someone your own size. 146 00:07:18,920 --> 00:07:21,040 I'll shout at a lot of you, let me learn this will you. 147 00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:21,380 Right. 148 00:07:22,600 --> 00:07:26,840 F for Freddy, G for Georgie, H for hospital. 149 00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:31,300 I don't know why you bother. 150 00:07:31,800 --> 00:07:34,380 I mean why don't you learn yourself to speak properly? 151 00:07:34,860 --> 00:07:36,200 My stance speaks lovely. 152 00:07:36,440 --> 00:07:37,480 Oh don't talk wet. 153 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:39,280 Your voice types you mate. 154 00:07:39,760 --> 00:07:42,840 In this country you can tell what a man is immediately he opens his mouth. 155 00:07:42,840 --> 00:07:44,540 Oh can you, can you. 156 00:07:44,620 --> 00:07:45,680 Here well just a minute now. 157 00:07:45,980 --> 00:07:48,540 What about that lovely poem you recited at school? 158 00:07:49,260 --> 00:07:49,740 Yeah. 159 00:07:50,420 --> 00:07:52,040 The reckoning Hesperus. 160 00:07:53,720 --> 00:07:57,080 My dear man that word is Hesperus. 161 00:07:57,920 --> 00:08:00,760 I mean how are you going to be understood over the radio if you continue to 162 00:08:00,760 --> 00:08:01,680 drop your H's? 163 00:08:02,780 --> 00:08:04,920 You're a snob, that's what you are. 164 00:08:05,320 --> 00:08:07,000 I can speak properly if I want to. 165 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:08,240 All right, all right. 166 00:08:08,300 --> 00:08:09,460 Repeat after me. 167 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:14,820 Hunting hounds have hardly ever hearkened to handsome Harold's hunting horn. 168 00:08:18,060 --> 00:08:20,100 It's a bit of cake mate. 169 00:08:20,220 --> 00:08:21,020 Go on then, go on. 170 00:08:22,020 --> 00:08:27,900 Hunting hounds have hardly ever hearkened to handsome Harold's hunting horn. 171 00:08:27,980 --> 00:08:28,700 How about that then? 172 00:08:28,700 --> 00:08:29,940 There you are, there you are. 173 00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:32,580 Look, you dropped an H on hardly. 174 00:08:33,360 --> 00:08:34,840 But he picked it up on heather. 175 00:08:36,500 --> 00:08:38,580 No, you shut up now. 176 00:08:39,240 --> 00:08:41,980 Now whether you lot like it or not I've got to learn this gospel. 177 00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:46,740 A for A, B for Bertie, D for Doctor, F for Oscar. 178 00:08:47,420 --> 00:08:52,360 Hunting hounds have hardly ever hearkened to handsome Harold's hunting horn. 179 00:08:52,880 --> 00:08:58,080 Hunting hounds have hardly ever hearkened to handsome Harold's hunting horn. 180 00:08:58,720 --> 00:09:00,780 Handsome Harold's hunting horn. 181 00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:04,040 Oi, who the hell's handsome Harold? 182 00:09:04,900 --> 00:09:06,780 I was just brushing up on the code mate. 183 00:09:06,860 --> 00:09:08,960 We've got to get right for our first radio trip, haven't we? 184 00:09:09,260 --> 00:09:10,740 That's a bloody nuisance, that is. 185 00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:11,680 It's not, you know. 186 00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:12,960 We've got company. 187 00:09:13,620 --> 00:09:14,620 Have we? 188 00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:14,760 Who? 189 00:09:14,760 --> 00:09:16,740 Yeah, Joyce and Edna, they're coming with us. 190 00:09:16,940 --> 00:09:17,620 Sort of training. 191 00:09:18,140 --> 00:09:19,740 They're thinking of issuing them with new equipment. 192 00:09:22,500 --> 00:09:23,500 Well I don't see why. 193 00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:25,180 Their old equipment looks good enough to me. 194 00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:27,440 Here's ten. 195 00:09:27,780 --> 00:09:30,280 When we turn around at the cemetery gates we'll have them to ourselves for 196 00:09:30,280 --> 00:09:30,840 twenty minutes. 197 00:09:33,220 --> 00:09:33,940 Hello darlings. 198 00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:36,760 Welcome aboard at number eleven minus ten. 199 00:09:37,140 --> 00:09:38,800 Jack, Jack, Jack, get aboard. 200 00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:39,560 I'll tell them we're leaving. 201 00:09:40,400 --> 00:09:42,340 Here, mate, get your hand off that radio. 202 00:09:42,480 --> 00:09:44,280 The way you're acting, you'll probably blow a fuse. 203 00:09:45,700 --> 00:09:46,180 Hello? 204 00:09:46,180 --> 00:09:46,660 Hello? 205 00:09:46,800 --> 00:09:49,180 Control here, calling Sugar Bertie eleven. 206 00:09:49,460 --> 00:09:50,560 Are you receiving me? 207 00:09:50,880 --> 00:09:52,560 This is the final check before leaving. 208 00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:52,960 Over. 209 00:09:53,340 --> 00:09:54,680 Hey, who's Sugar Bertie? 210 00:09:55,560 --> 00:09:56,300 That's me. 211 00:09:57,740 --> 00:09:58,860 I'm Sugar Bertie. 212 00:09:59,580 --> 00:10:00,640 Sugar Bertie. 213 00:10:00,960 --> 00:10:02,460 S.B. stands for Stan Butler. 214 00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:03,480 Sugar Bertie, that's me. 215 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:04,720 Sugar Bertie? 216 00:10:06,720 --> 00:10:08,440 All right, that's so you're dear. 217 00:10:08,560 --> 00:10:09,200 Go on, sit down. 218 00:10:11,320 --> 00:10:14,540 Sugar Bertie, Sugar Bertie, are you receiving me? 219 00:10:14,620 --> 00:10:14,860 Over. 220 00:10:15,500 --> 00:10:17,360 Sugar Bertie to Control. 221 00:10:17,740 --> 00:10:19,260 I'm ready to leave the depot. 222 00:10:19,380 --> 00:10:19,640 Over. 223 00:10:20,280 --> 00:10:23,040 Sugar Bertie eleven, why aren't you acknowledging me? 224 00:10:23,100 --> 00:10:23,340 Over. 225 00:10:23,700 --> 00:10:25,440 I am acknowledging you. 226 00:10:25,560 --> 00:10:25,900 Over. 227 00:10:25,900 --> 00:10:26,040 Over. 228 00:10:30,840 --> 00:10:33,140 Sugar Bertie eleven, why aren't you answering me? 229 00:10:33,780 --> 00:10:36,200 Sugar Bertie eleven, here I am answering you. 230 00:10:36,260 --> 00:10:36,460 Over. 231 00:10:36,780 --> 00:10:38,620 Well, why aren't I receiving you then? 232 00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:38,920 Over. 233 00:10:39,480 --> 00:10:40,940 Because you had the door shut. 234 00:10:41,080 --> 00:10:41,340 Over. 235 00:10:46,100 --> 00:10:49,280 Look, go back inside and I'll start again. 236 00:10:51,020 --> 00:10:52,560 Oh, there's no time now. 237 00:10:52,640 --> 00:10:53,960 Sugar Bertie eleven, you're clear. 238 00:10:54,080 --> 00:10:54,300 Over. 239 00:10:54,300 --> 00:10:55,840 Okay, Control. 240 00:10:56,760 --> 00:10:58,620 Here, just a minute, don't go yet. 241 00:10:59,100 --> 00:11:01,300 I just found out why it wasn't working. 242 00:11:01,720 --> 00:11:02,360 What technique? 243 00:11:02,920 --> 00:11:04,840 I didn't have the switch pressed down. 244 00:11:06,280 --> 00:11:07,440 Look, I'll show you. 245 00:11:08,100 --> 00:11:08,540 Oi! 246 00:11:09,440 --> 00:11:09,880 Oi! 247 00:11:13,660 --> 00:11:14,560 Oh, that's it. 248 00:11:14,940 --> 00:11:15,460 Here you are, darling. 249 00:11:15,540 --> 00:11:16,180 Oh, thank you. 250 00:11:16,480 --> 00:11:17,840 Do you want one of my maroons? 251 00:11:17,940 --> 00:11:19,060 No, thanks, not just now. 252 00:11:19,140 --> 00:11:19,620 All right. 253 00:11:20,060 --> 00:11:22,900 Right, I'll just get back to Control and tell Blake we've arrived at the 254 00:11:22,900 --> 00:11:23,460 cemetery gates. 255 00:11:23,460 --> 00:11:23,700 Yeah, that's right. 256 00:11:24,060 --> 00:11:24,660 Hey, Stan. 257 00:11:25,040 --> 00:11:25,180 Yeah? 258 00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:25,600 What? 259 00:11:25,820 --> 00:11:27,360 Tell him we won't be here for another ten minutes. 260 00:11:27,820 --> 00:11:28,700 What are you talking about? 261 00:11:28,780 --> 00:11:29,040 We're here. 262 00:11:29,340 --> 00:11:31,180 Yeah, give us more time to chat up the birds, see? 263 00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:42,880 Sugar Bertie eleven, Sugar Bertie eleven to Control. 264 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:43,240 Over. 265 00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:48,560 Hello? 266 00:11:49,540 --> 00:11:49,940 Control here. 267 00:11:50,300 --> 00:11:51,480 Come in, Sugar Bertie. 268 00:11:51,660 --> 00:11:52,300 Where are you? 269 00:11:52,360 --> 00:11:53,140 What is your position? 270 00:11:54,420 --> 00:11:58,120 We're stuck in the traffic jam at Acker Street and we won't be at the cemetery 271 00:11:58,120 --> 00:11:59,520 gates for another twenty minutes. 272 00:12:01,120 --> 00:12:01,680 Over. 273 00:12:02,580 --> 00:12:04,360 Message received, Sugar Bertie. 274 00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:04,900 Over. 275 00:12:05,620 --> 00:12:06,180 See? 276 00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:08,340 The system works. 277 00:12:09,240 --> 00:12:10,740 I know exactly where they are. 278 00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:15,680 These'll keep me in order. 279 00:12:18,500 --> 00:12:20,860 Message received, eleven forty-two, Miss Woodhall. 280 00:12:21,300 --> 00:12:21,420 Right. 281 00:12:22,560 --> 00:12:23,620 Hello, Sugar Bertie. 282 00:12:24,520 --> 00:12:26,180 Proceed to the cemetery gates. 283 00:12:26,640 --> 00:12:27,880 Wait there for seven minutes. 284 00:12:28,540 --> 00:12:30,540 When you're ready to leave, call me back. 285 00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:31,160 Over. 286 00:12:35,940 --> 00:12:37,380 It worked a treat! 287 00:12:37,640 --> 00:12:41,280 Yeah, look, I'll be chatting up Joyce, so it is all yours, you lucky bee. 288 00:12:41,300 --> 00:12:42,240 She fancies you. 289 00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:42,920 Yeah, yeah, you sure? 290 00:12:43,020 --> 00:12:43,760 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 291 00:12:44,060 --> 00:12:47,820 You take her off somewhere and I'll get in the bus with my bit. 292 00:12:49,380 --> 00:12:50,100 Hang on! 293 00:12:50,700 --> 00:12:52,140 Blimey, you've got all the bus! 294 00:12:52,960 --> 00:12:54,420 This is a cemetery, you know! 295 00:12:55,820 --> 00:12:58,960 What am I supposed to do, snog her up against one of the tombstones? 296 00:13:00,740 --> 00:13:03,260 Listen, mate, inside of the bus is my pitch. 297 00:13:03,300 --> 00:13:04,020 You've got the cab. 298 00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:06,660 What could I do inside a cab? 299 00:13:06,820 --> 00:13:07,900 Well, use your imagination. 300 00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:13,380 Whoa! 301 00:13:15,460 --> 00:13:17,220 Yeah, well, we've just been out to Blakey. 302 00:13:17,360 --> 00:13:17,960 There's no hurry. 303 00:13:18,860 --> 00:13:22,800 Edna, love, we've got another ten minutes and I thought you'd come in. 304 00:13:22,960 --> 00:13:24,900 I'll show you how to work the radio in a cab like for like. 305 00:13:25,160 --> 00:13:25,920 Yeah, all right then. 306 00:13:25,960 --> 00:13:26,560 Come in, Joyce. 307 00:13:26,840 --> 00:13:27,440 You're joking. 308 00:13:27,920 --> 00:13:28,960 I think I'll stay here. 309 00:13:29,020 --> 00:13:30,620 I'll go inside with Jack. 310 00:13:31,900 --> 00:13:32,600 Go on, love. 311 00:13:33,640 --> 00:13:36,220 Yeah, well, I'll take off my ticket machine then. 312 00:13:38,720 --> 00:13:41,720 You'll have to get inside, love, you see, because I can't show you outside. 313 00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:42,560 Oh, all right then. 314 00:13:42,600 --> 00:13:43,520 Give us a hand up. 315 00:13:43,540 --> 00:13:44,260 Right, I'll help. 316 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:46,340 Oh, excuse fingers. 317 00:13:49,300 --> 00:13:52,900 I'll have to get inside, darling, because it's a bit... 318 00:13:52,900 --> 00:13:53,840 You'll be squeezing it. 319 00:13:53,860 --> 00:13:54,340 Oh, look at that! 320 00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:55,460 The door's shut behind me. 321 00:13:57,400 --> 00:13:59,180 You've never been in a driving suit before? 322 00:13:59,180 --> 00:14:01,820 No, I've never had a passenger before, I tell you the truth. 323 00:14:02,640 --> 00:14:04,020 Here, hold on, Stan. 324 00:14:04,060 --> 00:14:05,260 You're squashing me. 325 00:14:05,260 --> 00:14:07,100 Yeah, well, I can't help it, darling, because it's only... 326 00:14:07,100 --> 00:14:08,500 Oh, look, I tell you what. 327 00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:10,260 Look, put your arm round there. 328 00:14:11,360 --> 00:14:12,020 See what I mean? 329 00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:13,340 More room for us then, you see. 330 00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:15,140 What's that hissing noise? 331 00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:16,560 Well, that's the radio. 332 00:14:16,680 --> 00:14:18,460 It's got to be kept on all the time, you see. 333 00:14:18,700 --> 00:14:20,740 Do you mean he can hear everything we're saying? 334 00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:21,640 No, no, no. 335 00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:25,100 No, he can get through to us any time he likes, but, you see, he can't hear me 336 00:14:25,100 --> 00:14:27,060 until I press the switch on the microphone. 337 00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:28,000 Oh, yeah? 338 00:14:29,480 --> 00:14:30,000 Yeah, yeah. 339 00:14:37,700 --> 00:14:40,700 I think it's about time I checked to see whether that number 11 got the 340 00:14:40,700 --> 00:14:41,520 cemetery gates yet. 341 00:14:42,300 --> 00:14:42,880 Thank you. 342 00:14:45,600 --> 00:14:47,300 Marvellous, this system, you know, Miss Woodall. 343 00:14:48,100 --> 00:14:49,560 I can check on them any time I like. 344 00:14:51,520 --> 00:14:52,680 I thought of this, you know. 345 00:14:54,820 --> 00:14:55,240 Hello? 346 00:14:55,980 --> 00:14:58,020 Control here, calling Sugar Bertie 11. 347 00:14:58,460 --> 00:14:59,500 Are you receiving me? 348 00:14:59,820 --> 00:15:00,500 Where are you? 349 00:15:00,540 --> 00:15:01,340 What is your position? 350 00:15:01,540 --> 00:15:02,380 Are you receiving me? 351 00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:03,420 Lovely. 352 00:15:07,540 --> 00:15:10,440 Sugar Bertie 11, are you there yet? 353 00:15:10,620 --> 00:15:10,820 Over. 354 00:15:11,620 --> 00:15:12,120 Not yet. 355 00:15:12,180 --> 00:15:13,400 I don't work that fast. 356 00:15:15,820 --> 00:15:16,620 Oh, Stan! 357 00:15:17,720 --> 00:15:19,460 Sugar Bertie, Sugar Bertie. 358 00:15:19,680 --> 00:15:21,680 Are you sure he can't hear us? 359 00:15:21,820 --> 00:15:23,460 Of course he can't, darling. 360 00:15:23,540 --> 00:15:25,620 Not until I put the switch down on the microphone. 361 00:15:25,900 --> 00:15:27,180 I've got to show you how it works anyway. 362 00:15:27,400 --> 00:15:28,100 Here we go, look. 363 00:15:28,660 --> 00:15:29,780 Now, I've got it like this, you see. 364 00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:31,020 Right, that's it. 365 00:15:31,040 --> 00:15:32,200 Press the button down like this. 366 00:15:33,440 --> 00:15:35,400 Sugar Bertie 11 to Control. 367 00:15:35,940 --> 00:15:36,380 Over. 368 00:15:37,100 --> 00:15:38,920 Sugar Bertie 11, Control here. 369 00:15:39,120 --> 00:15:41,540 Listen, but you keep in closer contact, you understand? 370 00:15:41,700 --> 00:15:41,880 Over. 371 00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:43,080 Yeah, the closer the better. 372 00:15:45,900 --> 00:15:48,040 We've arrived at the cemetery gates. 373 00:15:48,320 --> 00:15:49,780 Don't, no, don't, don't, don't. 374 00:15:51,600 --> 00:15:52,520 I know, I know. 375 00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:55,280 Oh, it's just a bit of local interference. 376 00:15:56,960 --> 00:15:58,000 That's very funny. 377 00:15:58,100 --> 00:15:59,780 None of the other busmen have had any of that. 378 00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:01,160 You're not having my luck. 379 00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:02,580 Over and out. 380 00:16:04,020 --> 00:16:06,000 Here, are you positive he can't hear? 381 00:16:06,260 --> 00:16:08,580 Oh, how many more times have I got to tell you, darling? 382 00:16:08,680 --> 00:16:11,180 Of course he can't, not until you put the switch down. 383 00:16:11,740 --> 00:16:14,260 Now, look, sweetheart, we've only got another seven minutes. 384 00:16:15,140 --> 00:16:16,400 Oh, come on. 385 00:16:17,140 --> 00:16:19,380 Oh, I'm all for this radio control, you know. 386 00:16:19,900 --> 00:16:21,540 Now, this is what I call radio control. 387 00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:22,860 Hello? 388 00:16:23,880 --> 00:16:24,300 Hello? 389 00:16:24,880 --> 00:16:25,920 That was Butler's voice. 390 00:16:26,140 --> 00:16:26,320 Hello? 391 00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:27,380 Are you receiving me? 392 00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:28,760 Are you receiving me? 393 00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:29,600 Over. 394 00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:33,400 You know, you see, you get lonely in a cab, you know. 395 00:16:34,040 --> 00:16:34,860 I do know some of you. 396 00:16:37,760 --> 00:16:38,460 Fancy June. 397 00:16:39,120 --> 00:16:41,320 The first time I saw you in a debt, I fancied you. 398 00:16:41,960 --> 00:16:43,120 You've got lofty eyes. 399 00:16:44,080 --> 00:16:45,180 You look really in there. 400 00:16:45,380 --> 00:16:46,680 Because you're different, you see. 401 00:16:47,580 --> 00:16:47,860 Yeah. 402 00:16:48,660 --> 00:16:50,860 I bet you've got a lot of boyfriends, ain't you? 403 00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:52,620 He's going mad. 404 00:16:54,420 --> 00:16:56,340 Oh, Stan, give over talking. 405 00:16:56,620 --> 00:16:58,020 Give us another kiss. 406 00:16:58,020 --> 00:16:59,100 I wouldn't do that. 407 00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:00,780 You take over talking. 408 00:17:02,960 --> 00:17:04,740 I'll pick up that bus on the way back. 409 00:17:05,440 --> 00:17:06,920 Come on, then, break it up. 410 00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:09,339 Ah, Blimey, what's the matter now? 411 00:17:09,420 --> 00:17:11,000 Ah, there's some passengers who want to get on. 412 00:17:11,180 --> 00:17:12,319 Oh, ain't it marvellous, eh? 413 00:17:12,640 --> 00:17:15,619 If it wasn't for the passengers, we should be a decent sort of a job. 414 00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:16,099 Come on, love. 415 00:17:16,460 --> 00:17:19,400 Here, Stan, can you get any music on that radio of yours? 416 00:17:19,480 --> 00:17:20,359 No, of course you can't. 417 00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:21,500 Oh, yes, you can. 418 00:17:21,560 --> 00:17:22,920 A bloke at the depot shoved me out the door. 419 00:17:23,020 --> 00:17:23,760 You got a nail folder? 420 00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:24,579 We can do it. 421 00:17:24,760 --> 00:17:25,119 It's quite easy. 422 00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:26,619 All you do is shove it in the back there. 423 00:17:26,980 --> 00:17:29,280 Hey, listen, mate, I'm responsible for that, you know. 424 00:17:29,280 --> 00:17:29,680 That's all right. 425 00:17:30,020 --> 00:17:30,960 Well, don't mess about. 426 00:17:32,060 --> 00:17:34,380 Delta Tango 14, are you receiving me? 427 00:17:34,440 --> 00:17:37,200 Delta Tango 14, are you receiving me, over? 428 00:17:38,060 --> 00:17:40,800 Hey, that must be one of our blokes on the 14 route. 429 00:17:41,720 --> 00:17:44,140 Tango 14, are you receiving me, over? 430 00:17:47,320 --> 00:17:49,160 Blimey, he's got his la-di-da voice, hasn't he? 431 00:17:49,940 --> 00:17:51,220 Let's see if we can chat with him. 432 00:17:51,900 --> 00:17:55,440 Sugar Bunny 11 here, are you receiving me, number 14, over? 433 00:17:56,080 --> 00:18:01,320 Delta Tango 14, we are going to Chicago via London, New York and Boston, over. 434 00:18:06,180 --> 00:18:11,220 Sugar Bunny Tango, if you take my advice, mate, you go to the gasworks by the I 435 00:18:11,220 --> 00:18:11,520 Street. 436 00:18:12,100 --> 00:18:13,360 Otherwise, they'll get me on here. 437 00:18:14,320 --> 00:18:17,080 Tango 14, will you get off my wavelength, please? 438 00:18:17,120 --> 00:18:19,500 Otherwise, I'll report you to Central Control, over. 439 00:18:20,440 --> 00:18:21,280 Cheeky devil. 440 00:18:21,420 --> 00:18:22,320 Go on, give him a mouthful. 441 00:18:22,420 --> 00:18:23,600 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 442 00:18:23,600 --> 00:18:29,000 Sugar Tango here, you can go and get Sugar Tango Uncle Freddy Freddy Easy 443 00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:29,460 Delta. 444 00:18:32,260 --> 00:18:34,640 Delta Tango 14, what code are you using, over? 445 00:18:35,580 --> 00:18:37,540 The busman's code, of course, over. 446 00:18:38,860 --> 00:18:40,360 Delta Tango 14. 447 00:18:40,900 --> 00:18:42,180 Delta Tango 14. 448 00:18:43,260 --> 00:18:44,040 Where are you? 449 00:18:44,120 --> 00:18:44,920 What is your height? 450 00:18:45,080 --> 00:18:45,740 What is your height? 451 00:18:45,840 --> 00:18:46,740 You'd better keep clear of it. 452 00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:47,820 What is your height, over? 453 00:18:48,460 --> 00:18:50,260 Five foot two in me socks, what's yours? 454 00:18:54,260 --> 00:18:56,740 Delta Tango 14, will you get off my wavelength? 455 00:18:56,960 --> 00:18:58,760 I'm coming in for my final approach. 456 00:18:59,660 --> 00:19:00,340 Final approach? 457 00:19:00,440 --> 00:19:02,020 Blimey, that's not a bus, that's a plane. 458 00:19:02,220 --> 00:19:03,020 That'd be dark. 459 00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:04,220 Can't get aeroplanes on here. 460 00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:05,160 Look, he's up there, look, mate. 461 00:19:06,120 --> 00:19:07,360 God, blimey, he is, too. 462 00:19:07,860 --> 00:19:09,120 God, look at him. 463 00:19:10,220 --> 00:19:12,540 Hey, look, that's what the Delta Tango is, you see? 464 00:19:12,760 --> 00:19:13,920 DT on his wings, see? 465 00:19:13,920 --> 00:19:14,180 That's right. 466 00:19:15,500 --> 00:19:17,860 Quick, quick, get this back to normal before I get shot. 467 00:19:19,120 --> 00:19:21,180 Sugar Birdie 11, are you receiving me? 468 00:19:21,260 --> 00:19:22,620 Please acknowledge, over. 469 00:19:22,620 --> 00:19:23,800 That's it, that's it, that's it. 470 00:19:23,860 --> 00:19:25,440 Yeah, I'll twiddle it and get her better than that. 471 00:19:25,540 --> 00:19:26,740 Oh, no, you won't, mate. 472 00:19:27,080 --> 00:19:29,800 Blimey, first you get aeroplanes, next you'll have the police, the ambulance and 473 00:19:29,800 --> 00:19:30,920 the lifeboat from Beachy Head. 474 00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:31,360 Get going. 475 00:19:32,340 --> 00:19:32,940 Come on, then. 476 00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:53,140 Hang about, hang about. 477 00:19:53,260 --> 00:19:54,200 I'm going to have a word with your driver. 478 00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:54,940 Butler? 479 00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:55,420 What? 480 00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:58,620 What do you mean by sending out them filthy messages over the radio? 481 00:19:58,840 --> 00:19:59,880 It's not a tie, you know. 482 00:20:00,220 --> 00:20:01,160 What are you talking about? 483 00:20:01,160 --> 00:20:03,500 Oh, yeah, oh, yeah. 484 00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:05,120 Blimey, I was only joking. 485 00:20:05,600 --> 00:20:05,880 Joking? 486 00:20:06,480 --> 00:20:08,200 You said I had nice eyes. 487 00:20:09,900 --> 00:20:12,160 Well, if I said that, mate, I must have been joking. 488 00:20:12,940 --> 00:20:15,320 You also said you fancied me. 489 00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:17,960 I'm reporting you for that, Butler. 490 00:20:18,300 --> 00:20:20,400 No busman's ever said anything like that to me before. 491 00:20:20,540 --> 00:20:22,000 You must be using the wrong sort of soap. 492 00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:24,940 Delta Control, Delta Control. 493 00:20:25,300 --> 00:20:26,560 Warning, Sugar Birdie 11. 494 00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:30,060 Sugar Birdie 11, Sugar Birdie 11, over. 495 00:20:30,060 --> 00:20:32,460 There's a burst water main in Market Street. 496 00:20:32,700 --> 00:20:34,300 Please divert to avoid hold-up. 497 00:20:35,140 --> 00:20:36,320 Hey, did you hear that, Blackie? 498 00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:38,300 You've any passions on board? 499 00:20:38,340 --> 00:20:39,560 No, I slung them off at the last stop. 500 00:20:39,840 --> 00:20:41,880 Right, turn left into Hackney Street and get a move on. 501 00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:42,920 Hang on, hang on. 502 00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:44,620 I don't know that district very well. 503 00:20:44,820 --> 00:20:45,760 I'm not getting a move on. 504 00:20:45,780 --> 00:20:46,600 I'm taking it easy. 505 00:20:46,780 --> 00:20:49,240 Never mind about taking it easy or running late as it is. 506 00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:49,920 You get a move on. 507 00:20:49,960 --> 00:20:51,160 I'm getting on the back to see you do. 508 00:20:51,340 --> 00:20:51,780 All right, then. 509 00:20:51,820 --> 00:20:52,800 That's the way you want it, mate. 510 00:20:53,060 --> 00:20:53,620 All right, then. 511 00:20:53,660 --> 00:20:54,280 That's it, then. 512 00:21:33,870 --> 00:21:34,970 Jack, you all right, mate? 513 00:21:34,990 --> 00:21:35,430 You all right? 514 00:21:36,590 --> 00:21:38,490 What do you want to go and do that for? 515 00:21:38,850 --> 00:21:40,350 God, you nearly killed us. 516 00:21:40,850 --> 00:21:41,910 Bloody hit the top, mate. 517 00:21:42,130 --> 00:21:43,410 I nearly went through the windscreen. 518 00:21:43,630 --> 00:21:44,790 Yeah, well, what about me? 519 00:21:44,850 --> 00:21:46,350 I was thrown at the ground. 520 00:21:46,530 --> 00:21:48,410 Oh, blimey, at least you fell on something soft. 521 00:21:48,490 --> 00:21:49,290 Thank you. 522 00:21:50,650 --> 00:21:52,390 Well, anyway, let's argue in a toss like this. 523 00:21:53,250 --> 00:21:53,730 Where's Blackie? 524 00:21:53,810 --> 00:21:54,550 Oh, he's all right. 525 00:21:54,570 --> 00:21:55,070 He's upstairs. 526 00:21:56,170 --> 00:21:56,530 Upstairs? 527 00:21:57,490 --> 00:21:58,610 Have you seen the... 528 00:21:59,830 --> 00:22:01,410 Blackie, Blackie, are you all right? 529 00:22:08,350 --> 00:22:10,470 Oh, blimey, Blackie, I've got to be honest. 530 00:22:10,830 --> 00:22:12,590 That's the first time I've been glad to see you. 531 00:22:13,110 --> 00:22:14,390 You did it on purpose, didn't you? 532 00:22:14,730 --> 00:22:15,970 You tried to kill me. 533 00:22:16,190 --> 00:22:17,050 No, I didn't, mate. 534 00:22:17,230 --> 00:22:18,950 It was your idea to go round that way. 535 00:22:19,430 --> 00:22:21,390 I mean, this ain't a single deck of bus, you know. 536 00:22:21,730 --> 00:22:22,610 It is now. 537 00:22:23,770 --> 00:22:26,570 I'll get you for this, but I'll never forget that. 538 00:22:26,610 --> 00:22:28,830 As long as I live, I saw that arch coming at me. 539 00:22:30,190 --> 00:22:31,710 I just tucked down in the nick of time. 540 00:22:32,810 --> 00:22:34,830 Oh, well, thank God we've got a radio on board anyway. 541 00:22:35,410 --> 00:22:38,410 Get in that cab, get back to base, tell them we're marooned out here stuck 542 00:22:38,410 --> 00:22:38,990 under a bridge. 543 00:22:39,310 --> 00:22:41,270 It's a good idea, but there's only one thing wrong with that. 544 00:22:41,430 --> 00:22:41,650 What? 545 00:22:41,950 --> 00:22:43,330 Radios don't work under a bridge. 546 00:22:48,730 --> 00:22:50,050 All right, get on, Sam. 547 00:22:50,190 --> 00:22:50,990 What did the manager say? 548 00:22:50,990 --> 00:22:51,930 Well, what could he say? 549 00:22:52,270 --> 00:22:55,250 I mean, it was Blakie's idea I went round that way, so I told him it was an act 550 00:22:55,250 --> 00:22:55,630 of God. 551 00:22:56,610 --> 00:22:59,610 Well, I see they've taken the radios out of the buses, then. 552 00:22:59,750 --> 00:23:00,290 Yeah, yeah. 553 00:23:00,470 --> 00:23:02,830 Mind you, the damage, god blimey, you know, cost a bit. 554 00:23:03,070 --> 00:23:04,270 It cost about 10,000 quid. 555 00:23:04,990 --> 00:23:06,170 Don't be daft, mate. 556 00:23:06,210 --> 00:23:08,330 I mean, a whole new bus only costs 3,000. 557 00:23:08,670 --> 00:23:10,490 Oh, I see you haven't got the message, have you? 558 00:23:10,790 --> 00:23:14,070 Well, you see, our bus was stuck under that bridge harder than I thought. 559 00:23:14,210 --> 00:23:14,530 Oh, yeah? 560 00:23:14,790 --> 00:23:15,230 What do you mean? 561 00:23:15,610 --> 00:23:17,710 Well, when they took the bus away, the bridge fell down. 562 00:23:28,990 --> 00:23:51,170 Oh, I 563 00:23:51,170 --> 00:23:51,270 see.