1 00:00:02,220 --> 00:00:03,220 Good morning. 2 00:00:03,240 --> 00:00:07,100 Good morning. Jason, I just got my first fan letter from my column. 3 00:00:07,300 --> 00:00:09,200 Good. That's wonderful. What's it say? 4 00:00:09,900 --> 00:00:14,360 Dear Miss Malone, I've never really given much thought to kitty litter, but 5 00:00:14,360 --> 00:00:19,880 recent article opened my eyes. Now I swear by Tabby Fresh, perhaps one day 6 00:00:19,880 --> 00:00:20,880 get a cat. 7 00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:28,560 Morning. Morning. 8 00:00:28,860 --> 00:00:30,020 Um, Dad? 9 00:00:31,050 --> 00:00:33,870 I don't want you to be mad, but I can't find my history book. 10 00:00:34,150 --> 00:00:37,330 Why would I be mad? I'm not the one who has to go to class without a book, Ben. 11 00:00:37,710 --> 00:00:40,110 I'm not the one who has to take a test unprepared. 12 00:00:40,590 --> 00:00:43,530 No, but you're the one who has to cough up 25 bucks to replace it. 13 00:00:44,430 --> 00:00:47,670 No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm sorry you're not listening, Ben. No, I'm not going 14 00:00:47,670 --> 00:00:48,670 to bail you out this time. 15 00:00:50,990 --> 00:00:51,990 You're right, Dad. 16 00:00:52,130 --> 00:00:53,650 It's time for a tough love lesson. 17 00:00:54,570 --> 00:00:55,810 I'm going to drop out of fifth period. 18 00:00:57,330 --> 00:00:58,730 I can always sell Mary. Jerry K. 19 00:00:59,090 --> 00:01:00,090 I've got good skin. 20 00:01:01,410 --> 00:01:03,590 Enough, Ben. Jason, give him $25. 21 00:01:03,990 --> 00:01:07,330 I've only got two 20s. You're a prince. 22 00:01:08,730 --> 00:01:09,730 Hello. 23 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:11,070 Scramble, please. 24 00:01:11,710 --> 00:01:15,530 Hey, Mike, did it ever occur to you that your mother is not just some domestic 25 00:01:15,530 --> 00:01:16,530 drudge? 26 00:01:17,490 --> 00:01:18,490 No. 27 00:01:20,130 --> 00:01:23,010 Dad, listen, I'm having a little problem with one of my college classes. 28 00:01:23,730 --> 00:01:27,610 Attending? No, no, Dad. I just can't seem to find my sociology book. 29 00:01:29,740 --> 00:01:33,160 And you're probably going to have to sell Mary Kay if I don't come up with 25 30 00:01:33,160 --> 00:01:34,320 bucks to replace it. 31 00:01:34,980 --> 00:01:36,460 No, it was Thighmasters. 32 00:01:39,380 --> 00:01:41,240 But actually, it was $35. 33 00:01:41,860 --> 00:01:45,960 Mike, Ben just took your father's last $40 for his lost history book. 34 00:01:47,320 --> 00:01:48,740 That little leech. 35 00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:53,060 Well, I hope you can eat Mike's eggs, too. 36 00:01:53,380 --> 00:01:55,800 Sorry. Okay, I'll try. 37 00:01:57,690 --> 00:02:00,330 Debbie Tigard won the Pulitzer Prize for journalism? 38 00:02:00,690 --> 00:02:01,690 Debbie who? 39 00:02:02,250 --> 00:02:04,190 My old college roommate. 40 00:02:04,710 --> 00:02:06,350 Somebody you know won the Pulitzer? 41 00:02:06,670 --> 00:02:07,670 That's great. 42 00:02:07,790 --> 00:02:08,790 Oh, yeah. 43 00:02:09,070 --> 00:02:12,590 Just the kind of good news you want to start your day. 44 00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:27,780 of yours wins the Pulitzer and you puree the paper? 45 00:03:28,080 --> 00:03:32,500 Jason, don't you remember Debbie Tigard, the one who made my life a living hell 46 00:03:32,500 --> 00:03:33,459 for four years? 47 00:03:33,460 --> 00:03:34,460 Doesn't ring a bell. 48 00:03:34,500 --> 00:03:37,760 Debbie, if he's breathing, I'll jump him, Tigard. 49 00:03:39,580 --> 00:03:41,120 Oh, yeah. 50 00:03:41,540 --> 00:03:44,160 Yeah, short, short brunette, shag haircut. 51 00:03:44,460 --> 00:03:46,900 I knew it. I always said no. 52 00:03:49,360 --> 00:03:53,680 Jason, she'd do anything to get ahead. Remember my old journalism professor, 53 00:03:53,780 --> 00:03:57,530 Rutger? Oh, I bet she was sleeping in a canopy bed. 54 00:03:58,810 --> 00:04:01,370 Don't get mad, but I lost my spelling book. 55 00:04:03,870 --> 00:04:08,330 Would this, by any chance, cost, oh, say, $35 to replace? 56 00:04:09,130 --> 00:04:10,130 Uh -oh. 57 00:04:12,090 --> 00:04:13,350 Give it up, Mike. 58 00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:14,790 I had to try. 59 00:04:16,850 --> 00:04:19,209 No, Jason, life is funny. 60 00:04:19,769 --> 00:04:23,910 Here Debbie Tigard is picking up a Pulitzer and I'm picking up... 61 00:04:24,270 --> 00:04:25,370 Foggy Cheerios. 62 00:04:25,990 --> 00:04:28,050 You're also overreacting, Maggie. 63 00:04:28,670 --> 00:04:32,710 You are not just a person who does menial chores all day. 64 00:04:33,090 --> 00:04:34,090 Missed a spot. 65 00:04:35,210 --> 00:04:40,470 You're a great housewife, Maggie, but you're also a damn fine journalist. 66 00:04:40,790 --> 00:04:41,790 Oh, sure. 67 00:04:41,910 --> 00:04:46,930 Here Debbie's writing about acid rain and I'm writing about, well, I'll just 68 00:04:46,930 --> 00:04:48,370 it, kitty doo -doo. 69 00:04:49,750 --> 00:04:52,290 Yeah, but you wrote the hell out of that. 70 00:04:53,799 --> 00:04:57,760 Jason, I don't understand it. Debbie couldn't string two sentences together 71 00:04:57,760 --> 00:04:58,880 she wins the Pulitzer? 72 00:04:59,440 --> 00:05:01,540 She was probably sleeping with the judges. 73 00:05:04,220 --> 00:05:07,360 You think I'm being petty, don't you? No, no, no, no. 74 00:05:08,160 --> 00:05:09,560 You're right, I am. 75 00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:13,400 You know, maybe Debbie's turned herself into a real journalist. 76 00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:16,040 You know, I'm a big enough person. 77 00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:19,940 I'm going to call and congratulate her. That's better. 78 00:05:25,570 --> 00:05:27,390 Yes, Debbie Thai Garden Features, please. 79 00:05:28,130 --> 00:05:31,590 Yes, this is an old friend of hers, Maggie Malone from the Long Island 80 00:05:32,730 --> 00:05:33,730 Yes, seriously. 81 00:05:37,390 --> 00:05:39,290 She can return my call in August? 82 00:05:41,310 --> 00:05:42,950 Well, yes. 83 00:05:43,610 --> 00:05:46,650 Yes, I would like to leave a message. 84 00:05:57,710 --> 00:05:58,710 Let's go over this again. 85 00:05:59,110 --> 00:06:01,210 You're in the park. You see the babe. 86 00:06:01,450 --> 00:06:02,450 What do you say? 87 00:06:03,030 --> 00:06:04,830 I'm crispy and I'm lost. 88 00:06:05,470 --> 00:06:07,190 Can you help me find my brother, Ben? 89 00:06:07,630 --> 00:06:09,250 My studly brother, Ben. 90 00:06:10,890 --> 00:06:12,370 And then I get the ice cream? 91 00:06:12,630 --> 00:06:15,430 Tell you what. I'll get you some ice cream and you don't have to do anything. 92 00:06:15,810 --> 00:06:17,310 Great. I'll go get my coat. 93 00:06:18,430 --> 00:06:20,290 You find your own babes. 94 00:06:22,650 --> 00:06:25,470 Hey, what are you doing? You blew my scam, Sam. 95 00:06:26,010 --> 00:06:27,030 Now I'm blowing yours. 96 00:06:27,290 --> 00:06:31,030 You know I had a whole lost book thing ready. So, I got there first. 97 00:06:31,270 --> 00:06:32,270 Listen, Junior. 98 00:06:32,730 --> 00:06:36,110 I perfected that scam while you were still saying paschetti. 99 00:06:37,630 --> 00:06:39,070 Can I get Rocky Road? 100 00:06:39,910 --> 00:06:44,010 Absolutely. And remember, Chrissy, who do we ask for when we need a babysitter 101 00:06:44,010 --> 00:06:45,009 this Saturday night? 102 00:06:45,010 --> 00:06:46,410 My studly brother, Ben. 103 00:06:52,950 --> 00:06:53,950 What's all that stuff? 104 00:06:54,310 --> 00:06:55,510 Ah, some of my old... 105 00:06:58,120 --> 00:06:59,120 An award? 106 00:06:59,360 --> 00:07:00,900 Why isn't this on the wall? 107 00:07:01,300 --> 00:07:05,960 Oh, it's just a little award. But I did beat out students from 50 schools, 108 00:07:06,060 --> 00:07:07,480 including Harvard and Yale. 109 00:07:08,520 --> 00:07:10,300 Wow. 1969? 110 00:07:10,620 --> 00:07:11,860 This thing's an antique. 111 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:16,920 What's that? A list of goals I made when I was 20. 112 00:07:17,700 --> 00:07:19,660 Become the first woman war correspondent. 113 00:07:20,100 --> 00:07:21,220 Learn Swahili. 114 00:07:21,880 --> 00:07:23,880 Have a novel published by age 35. 115 00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:27,740 I can't believe you actually did all these things. 116 00:07:28,180 --> 00:07:29,200 Way to go, Mom. 117 00:07:29,620 --> 00:07:33,040 Well, not everything, I'm afraid. Just the ones that are checked. 118 00:07:33,820 --> 00:07:37,560 Oh, come on. I mean, you did a lot of things here. I mean, how many people 119 00:07:37,560 --> 00:07:41,600 actually, um... Um... 120 00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:45,860 Learned to drive a stick shift. 121 00:08:00,360 --> 00:08:01,360 got to join a gym. 122 00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:08,820 Oh, Maggie, not that old list again. 123 00:08:09,240 --> 00:08:12,360 Can you believe I never toured the Soviet Union? 124 00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:18,300 It's good you didn't. Now there is no Soviet Union. Check it off. 125 00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:22,640 Fallen nations don't count. 126 00:08:22,880 --> 00:08:23,880 It was a goal. 127 00:08:24,340 --> 00:08:27,540 Boy, this Debbie Tigard thing is really good to you. 128 00:08:27,780 --> 00:08:28,780 Not at all. 129 00:08:29,360 --> 00:08:34,159 I could care less that Debbie vacuum -lips Tigard, lucked into a stinking 130 00:08:34,159 --> 00:08:35,159 Pulitzer. 131 00:08:36,820 --> 00:08:38,640 Well, I'm glad to see it's out of your system. 132 00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:44,039 Jason, this may have started out with Debbie, but now it's about me, my failed 133 00:08:44,039 --> 00:08:47,260 goals. I bet you accomplished everything on your list. 134 00:08:48,260 --> 00:08:53,260 Well, Peggy, come on, I've had my share of pain and disappointment. 135 00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:56,800 What? You never got to meet Herb Albert and the Tijuana Brass? 136 00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:00,220 I met the brass. 137 00:09:01,720 --> 00:09:03,900 Thank you. That makes me feel so much better. 138 00:09:04,380 --> 00:09:08,960 Oh, you've had a lot of success, Maggie. You worked at Newsweek and Channel 19. 139 00:09:09,300 --> 00:09:12,620 That doesn't count. I quit both of them. Yes, but you made a decision to do that 140 00:09:12,620 --> 00:09:15,360 because you wanted to spend more time with your family and to write that book 141 00:09:15,360 --> 00:09:18,200 yours, which I know you're going to get around to someday. 142 00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:22,780 Jason, don't you see? This list was made by a woman with dreams who wasn't 143 00:09:22,780 --> 00:09:23,780 afraid to test herself. 144 00:09:24,260 --> 00:09:26,720 Now, I know exactly when I got off track. It was 1972. 145 00:09:26,980 --> 00:09:28,040 Do you remember that year? 146 00:09:28,689 --> 00:09:29,689 Not specifically. 147 00:09:30,770 --> 00:09:34,350 I was covering the election in South Dakota, and I had the chance to follow 148 00:09:34,350 --> 00:09:37,410 George McGovern into a helicopter and get an exclusive interview. 149 00:09:37,790 --> 00:09:39,270 I don't remember that interview. 150 00:09:39,690 --> 00:09:41,390 Because I didn't get the interview. 151 00:09:41,870 --> 00:09:45,710 I was too scared to get into the chopper. And I've been living in the 152 00:09:45,710 --> 00:09:49,970 zone ever since. Come on, Maggie, you've done all kinds of uncomfortable things. 153 00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:54,530 Such as? Such as you got tear gassed when you protested against apartheid. 154 00:09:54,530 --> 00:09:55,530 gave birth. 155 00:09:55,760 --> 00:09:57,960 You saw Mike in Streetcar Named Desire. 156 00:10:00,420 --> 00:10:02,200 Face it, Jason, I'm a quitter. 157 00:10:02,720 --> 00:10:06,480 You're not, Maggie. You're still a young woman. You've got all kinds of time to 158 00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:09,620 do whatever you want. Not if I put it off for one more day. 159 00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:13,680 Jason, I'm going to master the things on this list. Okay. 160 00:10:13,960 --> 00:10:15,740 Starting with number six. Number six. 161 00:10:16,040 --> 00:10:17,700 Rappel down a mountain. Whoa, no. 162 00:10:18,700 --> 00:10:20,580 I need to challenge myself. 163 00:10:21,330 --> 00:10:25,390 All right, yeah, well, then try number 18, learn to play the sitar. 164 00:10:25,650 --> 00:10:29,030 All the challenge of rock climbing and a much higher survival rate. 165 00:10:29,990 --> 00:10:33,690 Jason, I don't want to spend the rest of my life hiding from the things that 166 00:10:33,690 --> 00:10:37,390 frighten me. Okay, fine, fine, but rappelling down the mountain, Maggie, 167 00:10:37,390 --> 00:10:38,530 on, you can't be serious. 168 00:10:39,230 --> 00:10:41,590 Okay, you're serious, but do I have to go with you? 169 00:10:42,290 --> 00:10:46,170 Oh, now, see, this double figure eight, Maggie, this is great. I mean, you can 170 00:10:46,170 --> 00:10:48,070 hold an elephant with that. Oh, whoa! 171 00:10:51,240 --> 00:10:54,700 You've been practicing, haven't you? Oh, a little bit. A little. Every night 172 00:10:54,700 --> 00:10:56,440 this week, she's tied something up. 173 00:10:59,340 --> 00:11:00,920 Wipe that smirk off your face. 174 00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:05,040 Oh, whoa. 175 00:11:05,440 --> 00:11:09,580 Today's a big day, huh? Yeah, you bet. Today we conquer a sheer rock face and 176 00:11:09,580 --> 00:11:13,020 see what we're made of. As long as what we're made of doesn't end up spread all 177 00:11:13,020 --> 00:11:14,200 over the sheer rock face. 178 00:11:15,660 --> 00:11:18,620 Relax, Dr. Seaver. This is going to be a day that you'll always remember. 179 00:11:19,390 --> 00:11:21,010 And this time, I'm sure the ropes are going to hold. 180 00:11:24,250 --> 00:11:27,810 So, um, you guys are going to be gone all day and won't be back till tomorrow, 181 00:11:27,930 --> 00:11:31,610 right? Well, we'll last through to Monday if your mom decides to bag 182 00:11:31,610 --> 00:11:32,610 bar. 183 00:11:33,970 --> 00:11:35,070 Okay, let's get the gear loaded. 184 00:11:35,670 --> 00:11:40,070 Okay. Bye, boys. Take good care of each other. Have fun. Be safe. 185 00:11:40,350 --> 00:11:42,510 Be well. Make sure Chrissy goes to college. 186 00:11:42,770 --> 00:11:44,110 All right, 187 00:11:44,950 --> 00:11:45,950 we'll miss you. 188 00:11:57,550 --> 00:11:58,550 rock in my shoe. 189 00:11:59,510 --> 00:12:03,310 Oh, what a perfect day to conquer your fears. Take a deep breath and step off 190 00:12:03,310 --> 00:12:04,310 the edge of the world. 191 00:12:04,850 --> 00:12:06,950 Well, here we are. 192 00:12:09,790 --> 00:12:11,690 Well, it doesn't look as bad as I thought. 193 00:12:13,490 --> 00:12:14,490 Maggie? 194 00:12:15,330 --> 00:12:16,330 Maggie? 195 00:12:28,920 --> 00:12:31,840 Maybe you can't keep hugging this mountain all night long. 196 00:12:32,400 --> 00:12:33,400 Watch me. 197 00:12:34,340 --> 00:12:36,120 Jason, how could you let me talk you into this? 198 00:12:36,540 --> 00:12:38,100 I'm just here for moral support. 199 00:12:38,340 --> 00:12:39,340 Stop that! 200 00:12:39,480 --> 00:12:43,160 I want physical support. I want an elevator, a ski lift. I'll even get in a 201 00:12:43,160 --> 00:12:44,160 helicopter. 202 00:12:44,540 --> 00:12:45,540 She's panicking. 203 00:12:46,300 --> 00:12:50,020 Well, if worse comes to worse, I can always pry her off the rock with a 204 00:12:50,980 --> 00:12:53,540 Is there anything you could say to assuage your fears? 205 00:12:54,300 --> 00:12:55,300 Okay. 206 00:12:55,880 --> 00:12:57,280 What does assuage mean? 207 00:12:58,460 --> 00:12:59,740 You know what litigation means? 208 00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:03,160 Jason, don't blame Kent. I thought I could do this. 209 00:13:03,380 --> 00:13:06,120 Would you like me to give her my customary pep talk? That would be nice. 210 00:13:06,580 --> 00:13:07,580 Okay. 211 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:11,340 What goes up must come down. 212 00:13:14,520 --> 00:13:15,720 Remember that, Jason. 213 00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:17,580 I want it on my tombstone. 214 00:13:18,660 --> 00:13:20,840 Peggy, all I can tell you is what you were telling me. 215 00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:24,880 Conquering this mountain is the first step in getting everything else you 216 00:13:25,100 --> 00:13:26,900 Jason, how does that help me win a Pulitzer? 217 00:13:28,560 --> 00:13:29,720 Good point. You want to leave? 218 00:13:30,720 --> 00:13:32,020 Jason, you can't let me quit. 219 00:13:32,320 --> 00:13:34,500 I thought you wanted to quit. Well, of course I do. 220 00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:41,560 Which is exactly why I can't. That a girl. Touch me and you die. 221 00:13:43,300 --> 00:13:47,680 Okay, now this will be just like we practiced. You want to keep your knees 222 00:13:49,260 --> 00:13:50,600 You want to stay focused. 223 00:13:51,600 --> 00:13:52,600 Okay? 224 00:13:52,780 --> 00:13:54,400 Most of all, relax. 225 00:13:54,900 --> 00:13:56,040 Just like having a baby. 226 00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:57,840 Can I have an epidural? 227 00:13:58,980 --> 00:13:59,980 Ready? 228 00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:01,800 As ready as I'll ever be. 229 00:14:02,340 --> 00:14:06,060 Okay. I'm going to lower you down the mountain slowly, nice and easy. 230 00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:08,140 Okay, honey, I love you. I love you, too. 231 00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:09,480 You're going to be fine. 232 00:14:09,880 --> 00:14:10,839 You're fine. 233 00:14:10,840 --> 00:14:11,840 You practiced. 234 00:14:12,780 --> 00:14:14,040 Looking good. It's working. 235 00:14:14,280 --> 00:14:15,400 That's it. It's working. 236 00:14:16,260 --> 00:14:17,440 I'm not going to die. 237 00:14:17,660 --> 00:14:18,619 No. 238 00:14:18,620 --> 00:14:20,880 Honey, this could actually be fun. 239 00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:22,120 Yeah. 240 00:14:22,200 --> 00:14:24,200 Okay, now, you ready to try a push -off? 241 00:14:26,980 --> 00:14:28,540 Two. Three. 242 00:14:29,560 --> 00:14:30,560 Whoa. 243 00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:32,800 Whoa. 244 00:14:33,320 --> 00:14:34,320 Whoa. 245 00:14:34,820 --> 00:14:35,820 Whoa. 246 00:14:37,540 --> 00:14:39,720 I'm supposed to smack you into the rock like that? 247 00:14:41,620 --> 00:14:42,860 Honey, are you all right? 248 00:14:43,460 --> 00:14:44,460 I'm fine. 249 00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:45,840 Who are you? 250 00:14:47,160 --> 00:14:48,900 No, I think I'm stuck. 251 00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:50,180 She's stuck. 252 00:14:50,260 --> 00:14:53,080 She's stuck. You've got to do something. Well, her guideline's just tangled in 253 00:14:53,080 --> 00:14:55,800 that rock down there. One of us is going to have to go down there and free it 254 00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:56,860 up. Good plan. 255 00:14:57,140 --> 00:15:00,160 And the more experienced one is going to have to stay here and anchor the rope. 256 00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:05,000 They're jumping off a mountain? 257 00:15:05,340 --> 00:15:08,020 Their midlife crisis is my window of opportunity. 258 00:15:08,420 --> 00:15:12,260 You see, I rented the house to a film crew today for 500 bucks, and all I had 259 00:15:12,260 --> 00:15:13,540 do was show them we have fire insurance. 260 00:15:14,460 --> 00:15:15,460 Pretty smooth. 261 00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:18,220 Yeah, well, how are things in Arizona? 262 00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:19,920 Did your dad get that truck stop cafe? 263 00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:23,320 Yeah, I'm calling from our state -of -the -art kitchen. 264 00:15:26,540 --> 00:15:28,840 They got, uh, mobile phones and everything. 265 00:15:30,100 --> 00:15:31,660 Yeah? Well, how's your dad? 266 00:15:32,020 --> 00:15:33,140 Oh, he's fine. 267 00:15:33,540 --> 00:15:37,180 He just rented a crane to put the world's biggest coffee pot on the roof. 268 00:15:38,280 --> 00:15:40,000 Well, well, that should pull on the tourists. 269 00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:48,040 Yeah, and if that doesn't the world's biggest skylight will. 270 00:15:49,400 --> 00:15:52,900 I better get out of here before this turns into an outdoor cafe. I'll call 271 00:15:52,900 --> 00:15:53,900 next week. 272 00:15:53,960 --> 00:15:55,380 Okay, we miss you. Bye. 273 00:16:03,090 --> 00:16:05,090 Sorry, party dog, but you've been fixed. 274 00:16:06,010 --> 00:16:09,650 No way. Kenny's bringing a DJ and a bunch of party girls wearing too much 275 00:16:09,650 --> 00:16:11,210 makeup. This place is mine. 276 00:16:12,390 --> 00:16:14,290 All right, all right. I'll level with you, Ben. 277 00:16:15,070 --> 00:16:18,390 Now, listen, I don't need this place for me. I need it for a group of 278 00:16:18,390 --> 00:16:19,790 underprivileged inner -city kids. 279 00:16:21,450 --> 00:16:22,450 Really? What for? 280 00:16:23,270 --> 00:16:26,270 Well, it's kind of like a suburbia day trip for them, Ben. I mean, some of 281 00:16:26,270 --> 00:16:30,210 kids have never even seen a lawn sprinkler or so much as a refrigerator 282 00:16:32,700 --> 00:16:36,840 Wait, you don't care a rat's hat about underprivileged kids. 283 00:16:37,460 --> 00:16:42,020 Oh, yeah? Well, here, why don't you tell that to little Alfonso, Manuel, and 284 00:16:42,020 --> 00:16:43,020 Harvey? 285 00:16:45,320 --> 00:16:48,540 I wish you'd have told me this last week before I invited the whole school. 286 00:16:50,160 --> 00:16:52,320 Hey, that's Menudo. 287 00:16:54,560 --> 00:16:56,660 I was with you when you bought that wallet. 288 00:16:58,540 --> 00:17:01,360 Get ready for some babes in heavy eyeliner. 289 00:17:36,209 --> 00:17:38,790 Isn't that what got us into this predicament in the first place? 290 00:17:42,090 --> 00:17:44,390 Why are there red stains all over those rugs? 291 00:17:45,270 --> 00:17:49,790 Jason, stop that. I'm counting on you to be the rational one. Hard to be 292 00:17:49,790 --> 00:17:52,210 rational when you're dangling like a wind chime, Maggie. 293 00:17:53,290 --> 00:17:55,210 Jason, check my thinking here. 294 00:17:56,130 --> 00:17:59,650 Repelling is just symbolic. It doesn't make me a better person in and of 295 00:18:00,030 --> 00:18:01,030 True. 296 00:18:11,400 --> 00:18:14,180 Tell me it's okay to forget this and go home? Is that what you want me to say, 297 00:18:14,220 --> 00:18:16,020 Maggie? Work with me here, Jason. 298 00:18:16,740 --> 00:18:18,660 It's okay to quit and go home. 299 00:18:19,380 --> 00:18:20,600 Did you have to say quit? 300 00:18:21,060 --> 00:18:24,180 Couldn't you say hang in there or come to your senses? 301 00:18:24,820 --> 00:18:27,000 All right, Maggie, there are two ways out of this situation. 302 00:18:27,260 --> 00:18:28,260 Up or down. 303 00:18:28,520 --> 00:18:29,520 That's it? 304 00:18:29,860 --> 00:18:33,420 Well, we could spend our golden years here, but I doubt the kids would visit. 305 00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:36,020 Oh, Jason, I don't think that's very funny. 306 00:18:37,020 --> 00:18:39,300 Maggie, you want straight talk, sweetheart? Here it is, okay? 307 00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:43,540 You can either have Kent pull you back up into that comfort zone and be the 308 00:18:43,540 --> 00:18:47,760 person you've always been, which is fine, or you can be tough, Maggie. You 309 00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:50,980 show this mountain who's boss. You can have an adventure you'll remember till 310 00:18:50,980 --> 00:18:54,440 your dying day, which isn't for many years. 311 00:19:24,560 --> 00:19:25,620 More experience than you are. 312 00:19:25,940 --> 00:19:27,520 You're rusty and out of practice. 313 00:19:29,260 --> 00:19:32,880 Maybe you should ask yourself this. Where's your party? Where's your film 314 00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:34,880 They'll be here. 315 00:19:35,020 --> 00:19:39,200 But your party is history. I spread the word that you were having chaperones. 316 00:19:39,880 --> 00:19:40,900 You're so simple. 317 00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:46,160 I knew that and told everybody the chaperones were 19 -year -old au pairs. 318 00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:51,160 What you don't know is that I called your film crew and rescheduled for 319 00:19:53,550 --> 00:19:54,750 Poor deceived wretch. 320 00:19:55,710 --> 00:19:58,830 They know only to take instructions with a code word. 321 00:19:59,410 --> 00:20:00,410 Delta Dawn. 322 00:20:04,350 --> 00:20:07,690 You know, there are other extensions in this house. 323 00:20:08,970 --> 00:20:10,750 Hasta la vista, film crew. 324 00:20:12,830 --> 00:20:16,930 Well, before you gloat, maybe you should check out the front door. I think 325 00:20:16,930 --> 00:20:17,930 there's something out there. 326 00:20:18,270 --> 00:20:19,990 Well, there's something out there, all right. 327 00:20:20,410 --> 00:20:22,550 Instant party. Just add Ben. 328 00:20:26,570 --> 00:20:27,850 Police lines do not cross. 329 00:20:28,750 --> 00:20:29,750 Read the sign. 330 00:20:30,130 --> 00:20:32,350 Party is canceled due to the bubonic plague. 331 00:20:34,590 --> 00:20:36,270 Hasta la vista, party. 332 00:20:39,010 --> 00:20:40,470 What you going to do that for? 333 00:20:41,030 --> 00:20:44,070 When you went scamming freely in this house for years, when's it going to be 334 00:20:44,070 --> 00:20:46,750 turn? Hey, you had your turn. When I had my tonsils out. 335 00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:01,040 as mine. 336 00:21:01,120 --> 00:21:02,120 Are you kidding? 337 00:21:02,220 --> 00:21:03,600 I watched Star Search. 338 00:21:05,380 --> 00:21:09,680 Well, let's face it. I mean, I didn't get my $500. You didn't get to have your 339 00:21:09,680 --> 00:21:10,680 part. 340 00:21:11,140 --> 00:21:12,140 So what are you saying? 341 00:21:12,280 --> 00:21:16,720 Well, I'm saying that if I haven't used this game for one calendar year, it's 342 00:21:16,720 --> 00:21:17,679 all yours. 343 00:21:17,680 --> 00:21:21,120 Does that include taking Dad's card at the airport and using it as a gypsy cap? 344 00:21:22,660 --> 00:21:23,660 Who's here? 345 00:21:24,040 --> 00:21:25,820 Mom. Hey, guys. Dad, you're alive. 346 00:21:26,340 --> 00:21:27,480 Yep, and guess what? 347 00:21:31,050 --> 00:21:33,130 legs. I can't believe it. My parents repelling. 348 00:21:34,110 --> 00:21:36,610 Actually, a helicopter came for your father. 349 00:21:39,610 --> 00:21:41,610 Hey, repelling wasn't on my list. 350 00:21:42,770 --> 00:21:46,790 Well, I feel like a whole new Maggie. There's nothing that I can't do now. 351 00:21:46,990 --> 00:21:49,750 I'm just glad you made your list before they invented bungee jumping. 352 00:21:51,930 --> 00:21:53,030 Bungee jumping? 353 00:21:53,530 --> 00:21:56,930 What a great idea. I'm going to go make an appointment for us this evening. No, 354 00:21:56,930 --> 00:21:57,930 no, no. 355 00:21:58,800 --> 00:22:00,480 Do you remember last night at the lodge? 356 00:22:02,060 --> 00:22:03,060 Yes, I do. 357 00:22:06,460 --> 00:22:08,980 Mother and I are going bungee jumping. 358 00:22:32,330 --> 00:22:35,930 an inch in diameter, light enough for me to carry on my belt without noticing. 359 00:22:36,210 --> 00:22:42,130 But there I hung with only that rope between me and death. I saw my husband, 360 00:22:42,130 --> 00:22:43,910 family, my career. 361 00:22:44,630 --> 00:22:49,750 And I realized that I'm one of those lucky women who really does have it all.