1 00:00:02,503 --> 00:00:04,413 [relaxed music] 2 00:00:04,438 --> 00:00:05,568 [sighs] 3 00:00:05,606 --> 00:00:07,706 [laughs] 4 00:00:07,741 --> 00:00:09,681 That feels really good. 5 00:00:09,710 --> 00:00:11,550 I know what else can make you feel good. 6 00:00:11,579 --> 00:00:12,779 What? 7 00:00:12,813 --> 00:00:16,153 I'm thinking about tying you up. 8 00:00:16,184 --> 00:00:20,454 I'm gonna tie you up right now... 9 00:00:20,488 --> 00:00:22,088 [whispers] with spaghetti. 10 00:00:22,123 --> 00:00:23,623 Spaghetti? Really? 11 00:00:23,657 --> 00:00:26,757 Yeah, I love spaghetti. 12 00:00:26,794 --> 00:00:29,234 Okay, that's good. Just keep doing that. 13 00:00:29,263 --> 00:00:34,273 * 14 00:00:34,302 --> 00:00:35,272 [sighs] 15 00:00:35,303 --> 00:00:40,073 [phone ringing] 16 00:00:40,108 --> 00:00:41,138 [answering machine beeps] 17 00:00:41,175 --> 00:00:42,235 (man) Paul? 18 00:00:42,276 --> 00:00:43,336 It's grandpa. 19 00:00:43,377 --> 00:00:44,647 Why are you stopping? 20 00:00:44,678 --> 00:00:46,278 (man) I know you're there. 21 00:00:46,314 --> 00:00:47,584 Paul? 22 00:00:47,615 --> 00:00:51,085 Hello? Damn it. 23 00:00:52,353 --> 00:00:53,693 - Wonder what he wanted. - I don't know. 24 00:00:53,721 --> 00:00:55,491 You should call him back, Paul. 25 00:00:55,523 --> 00:00:57,833 Maybe somebody broke in and tied him up with spaghetti. 26 00:00:57,858 --> 00:00:59,188 - Good night. - What? 27 00:00:59,227 --> 00:01:00,627 What do you mean, good night? 28 00:01:00,661 --> 00:01:02,261 No, no, no, no, we're just getting started, babe. 29 00:01:02,296 --> 00:01:03,426 I lost it, Paul. 30 00:01:03,464 --> 00:01:04,874 Spaghetti, your grandfather... 31 00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:06,368 - No, no, no. - I think I smell old people. 32 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:08,240 - I really do. - You smell amazing. 33 00:01:08,269 --> 00:01:11,209 I got a big day tomorrow. Good night, sweetheart. 34 00:01:11,239 --> 00:01:14,409 Karen, are you seriously gonna leave me hanging? 35 00:01:14,442 --> 00:01:16,212 You know I have to go take care of myself now, right? 36 00:01:16,244 --> 00:01:17,614 Yeah, just turn the fan on in the bathroom 37 00:01:17,645 --> 00:01:18,705 so I don't have to hear it. 38 00:01:18,746 --> 00:01:20,306 You can hear me? 39 00:01:28,656 --> 00:01:30,116 [door rattles closed] 40 00:01:30,158 --> 00:01:33,158 [fan whirring] 41 00:01:37,331 --> 00:01:38,771 [fan clicks off] 42 00:01:38,799 --> 00:01:41,869 [Zeus' You Gotta Teller] 43 00:01:41,902 --> 00:01:45,212 [upbeat rock music] 44 00:01:45,239 --> 00:01:46,609 * 45 00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:48,380 (man) * You gotta tell her 46 00:01:48,409 --> 00:01:49,639 * 47 00:01:49,677 --> 00:01:50,877 * She's got to know 48 00:01:50,911 --> 00:01:52,651 Yeah! 49 00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:53,810 (man) * You gotta tell her 50 00:01:53,847 --> 00:01:55,477 * 51 00:01:55,516 --> 00:01:57,886 * She's got to know 52 00:01:57,918 --> 00:01:59,348 [skates scraping] 53 00:02:01,922 --> 00:02:03,392 [car horn honks] 54 00:02:03,424 --> 00:02:04,934 You are my favorite grandson. 55 00:02:04,958 --> 00:02:06,288 You know that? 56 00:02:06,327 --> 00:02:08,357 I'm your only grandson, Grandpa. 57 00:02:08,396 --> 00:02:10,726 Yeah, I know, but even so, 58 00:02:10,764 --> 00:02:13,534 your sister Janine is so self-involved, 59 00:02:13,567 --> 00:02:15,637 she hasn't been around to see me in three months. 60 00:02:15,669 --> 00:02:19,409 Oh, no, Janine is in the slums of Maharashtra, India, 61 00:02:19,440 --> 00:02:21,340 trying to bring clean water and sanitation 62 00:02:21,375 --> 00:02:22,535 to the children there. 63 00:02:22,576 --> 00:02:24,446 Which is a fancy way of saying 64 00:02:24,478 --> 00:02:26,608 she's banging some goddamn Indian. 65 00:02:26,647 --> 00:02:28,647 No, it's a school thing. 66 00:02:28,682 --> 00:02:30,922 Goddamn liberal Indian bang schools. 67 00:02:30,951 --> 00:02:33,191 I never liked her anyway. 68 00:02:33,221 --> 00:02:34,821 You, I like. 69 00:02:34,855 --> 00:02:37,425 - Well, thanks, Grandpa. - I've had a great life, Paulie. 70 00:02:37,458 --> 00:02:39,358 Nine or ten of them, if you count 'em up, 71 00:02:39,393 --> 00:02:40,433 really, I have. 72 00:02:40,461 --> 00:02:42,261 I'm tired. 73 00:02:42,296 --> 00:02:45,526 The chemo's wiped me out. I'm done. 74 00:02:45,566 --> 00:02:47,366 - You just need some rest. - No, no, no, no, no. 75 00:02:47,401 --> 00:02:49,571 You don't understand what I'm saying. 76 00:02:49,603 --> 00:02:50,703 Finito. 77 00:02:50,738 --> 00:02:53,308 Finale. I give up. 78 00:02:53,341 --> 00:02:55,511 I need you to put me out of my misery. 79 00:02:55,543 --> 00:02:58,853 I need you, my favorite grandson, 80 00:02:58,879 --> 00:03:01,919 to kill me for once and for all. 81 00:03:01,949 --> 00:03:03,549 You want me to kill you? 82 00:03:03,584 --> 00:03:04,754 I'm begging you. 83 00:03:04,785 --> 00:03:06,715 And how am I supposed to do this? 84 00:03:06,754 --> 00:03:08,664 You figure it out. Google it or something. 85 00:03:08,689 --> 00:03:10,889 But I need to be checked out by Sunday. 86 00:03:10,924 --> 00:03:12,564 Why Sunday? 87 00:03:12,593 --> 00:03:14,903 Because I can't bear to watch another Jets game. 88 00:03:14,928 --> 00:03:17,528 I don't know, Grandpa. 89 00:03:17,565 --> 00:03:19,865 I don't think I'm equipped to do this. 90 00:03:19,900 --> 00:03:24,640 It'll go a long way toward proving that you're not a homo. 91 00:03:24,672 --> 00:03:26,412 [sighs] 92 00:03:26,440 --> 00:03:29,740 [upbeat rock music] 93 00:03:29,777 --> 00:03:36,777 * 94 00:03:38,986 --> 00:03:40,416 (man) Yo, I got smashed the other night, 95 00:03:40,454 --> 00:03:41,664 and I hooked up with this chick 96 00:03:41,689 --> 00:03:43,389 who looked just like Wayne Gretzky. 97 00:03:43,424 --> 00:03:45,334 I hooked up with a girl looked like Eric Lindros. 98 00:03:45,359 --> 00:03:46,859 She was like 6'10". It was sick. 99 00:03:46,894 --> 00:03:48,904 I found out that Gretzky peed in his pants 100 00:03:48,929 --> 00:03:50,659 every game he played, just pissed. 101 00:03:50,698 --> 00:03:51,898 Oh, yeah. You didn't know that? 102 00:03:51,932 --> 00:03:53,632 - What, you knew that? - Obviously. 103 00:03:53,667 --> 00:03:55,267 When you get a Gretzky jersey, 104 00:03:55,303 --> 00:03:56,673 you ask for the one that has the urine in it. 105 00:03:56,704 --> 00:03:58,414 - Mm-hmm. - That's like his autograph. 106 00:03:58,439 --> 00:04:00,009 Like, he would pee in the jerseys before every game. 107 00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:01,610 Sometimes he's peed on the other guys' jerseys. 108 00:04:01,642 --> 00:04:02,712 He peed on the other guys' jerseys? 109 00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:04,013 Yeah, like, for luck. 110 00:04:04,044 --> 00:04:05,754 That's why the Rangers never won, 111 00:04:05,779 --> 00:04:07,419 because they didn't let him pee in his jerseys. 112 00:04:07,448 --> 00:04:09,478 Dude, he should piss all over us. We suck today. 113 00:04:09,517 --> 00:04:11,687 [banging] - There it is. 114 00:04:11,719 --> 00:04:13,349 Dickie, what'd you get, another new stick? 115 00:04:13,387 --> 00:04:14,887 Yeah, Bauer VAPOR 1X. 116 00:04:14,922 --> 00:04:17,332 Guaranteed to go top shelf with this bad boy. 117 00:04:17,358 --> 00:04:18,888 Yeah, top shelf of some guy's ass, maybe. 118 00:04:18,926 --> 00:04:20,056 Where's the stick from last week? 119 00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:21,633 I threw that away, dude. 120 00:04:21,662 --> 00:04:22,932 Oh, dude, I would've loved that stick. 121 00:04:22,963 --> 00:04:24,403 What would you have done with it, man? 122 00:04:24,432 --> 00:04:26,032 It would've been terrible for you. 123 00:04:26,066 --> 00:04:27,836 It recoils in the lower shaft, and it's too stiff. 124 00:04:27,868 --> 00:04:29,068 Sebalos loves his shafts stiff. 125 00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:30,542 Bang. Exploding. 126 00:04:30,571 --> 00:04:31,671 [guffaws] That's so original. 127 00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:33,005 Dude, what is with you? 128 00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:34,440 It's just some crazy shit went down 129 00:04:34,475 --> 00:04:35,675 with my grandpa this morning, so... 130 00:04:35,709 --> 00:04:36,909 Oh, really? I'm sorry, man. 131 00:04:36,944 --> 00:04:38,614 - Is he okay? - Yeah, kind of. 132 00:04:38,646 --> 00:04:40,746 I mean, actually, not really, no. 133 00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:41,821 Well, what's wrong? 134 00:04:41,849 --> 00:04:43,549 It's just he's shot. 135 00:04:43,584 --> 00:04:44,754 What is this world coming to? 136 00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:46,445 Who would shoot an old man? 137 00:04:46,487 --> 00:04:47,487 What? No, no. 138 00:04:47,521 --> 00:04:48,721 He's shot mentally. 139 00:04:48,756 --> 00:04:50,686 He wants to die. He's done. 140 00:04:50,724 --> 00:04:52,094 And he wants me to do it. 141 00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:54,425 Wait. Wait. Wait. Hold on. He wants you to do what? 142 00:04:54,462 --> 00:04:55,602 Kill him, basically. 143 00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:56,699 You're kidding, right? 144 00:04:56,730 --> 00:04:58,770 - No. - Dude, that is awesome. 145 00:04:58,799 --> 00:04:59,999 - Awesome? - Yeah. 146 00:05:00,033 --> 00:05:01,743 That is a serious honor, man, 147 00:05:01,769 --> 00:05:03,469 like some real samurai shit. 148 00:05:03,504 --> 00:05:05,644 He could've chosen anybody, but he chose you. 149 00:05:05,673 --> 00:05:07,513 Yeah, I think I'd prefer if he chose anybody. 150 00:05:07,541 --> 00:05:08,641 Well, how much is he leaving you? 151 00:05:08,676 --> 00:05:09,936 - What? - In his will, I mean. 152 00:05:09,977 --> 00:05:11,477 What are you-- what do you--I don't know. 153 00:05:11,512 --> 00:05:13,482 I don't even know if he has a will. 154 00:05:13,514 --> 00:05:15,084 Well, that's something you're gonna want to find out, dude. 155 00:05:15,115 --> 00:05:16,575 You have leverage right now. 156 00:05:16,617 --> 00:05:17,647 That's a conversation you want to have 157 00:05:17,685 --> 00:05:18,985 sooner than later. 158 00:05:19,019 --> 00:05:20,519 Dickie, you seriously are a twisted-ass person. 159 00:05:20,554 --> 00:05:21,994 Yeah, Dickie, you're a sick bastard. 160 00:05:22,022 --> 00:05:23,562 I would've loved that stick you threw out, 161 00:05:23,591 --> 00:05:24,631 you son of a bitch. 162 00:05:24,658 --> 00:05:25,788 Enough with the stick. 163 00:05:25,826 --> 00:05:27,596 Paul's got a real situation here. 164 00:05:27,628 --> 00:05:30,528 Well, money aside, I would definitely grant him his wish. 165 00:05:30,564 --> 00:05:31,904 Yeah, I mean, dude, if you think about it, 166 00:05:31,932 --> 00:05:33,132 it's not the craziest idea. 167 00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:34,666 I mean, he's gonna croak any day now. 168 00:05:34,702 --> 00:05:35,972 - What is he, like, 90? - 78. 169 00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:37,943 And, yes, this is crazy. 170 00:05:37,971 --> 00:05:39,571 I wouldn't even know where to start. 171 00:05:39,607 --> 00:05:41,507 (Randy) Cinnamon, bro. 172 00:05:41,542 --> 00:05:43,482 Dude, he's not having a bake sale, okay? 173 00:05:43,511 --> 00:05:45,551 He's murdering somebody, and it's not just anybody, 174 00:05:45,579 --> 00:05:47,579 for crap's sake. It's his own peepaw. 175 00:05:47,615 --> 00:05:49,875 That's not even funny, Dickie. Bro, relax. 176 00:05:49,917 --> 00:05:51,887 He's just trying to help, and, Dickie, it's not murder exactly. 177 00:05:51,919 --> 00:05:53,819 - Eeh... - No, it is. 178 00:05:53,854 --> 00:05:55,794 That's why you want to make it look like something else. 179 00:05:55,823 --> 00:05:58,033 See, you and your grandpa each take the cinnamon challenge, 180 00:05:58,058 --> 00:05:59,928 make it look like you wanted to play a game. 181 00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:01,960 He goes first. Shit dries up in his lungs. 182 00:06:01,995 --> 00:06:04,125 With his age and health, he'll drop like a rock. 183 00:06:04,164 --> 00:06:06,034 Then you're free and clear, bro. 184 00:06:06,066 --> 00:06:07,996 You want me to watch my grandfather 185 00:06:08,035 --> 00:06:09,965 gasp for his last breath? 186 00:06:10,003 --> 00:06:11,713 Oh, or you could do the Dexter thing 187 00:06:11,739 --> 00:06:13,609 and just wrap him in plastic and then chop him up. 188 00:06:13,641 --> 00:06:14,641 - Oh, yeah. - Yeah. 189 00:06:14,675 --> 00:06:16,475 I'm not gonna Dexter him, 190 00:06:16,510 --> 00:06:18,750 and I'm not gonna kill him with cinnamon, all right? 191 00:06:18,779 --> 00:06:20,749 Jesus, for someone who's about to kill his peepaw, 192 00:06:20,781 --> 00:06:21,951 you got an awful lot of rules. 193 00:06:21,982 --> 00:06:23,182 What about the ice bucket challenge? 194 00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:24,716 Is that still a thing? 195 00:06:24,752 --> 00:06:26,022 No, they cured ice bucket disease, dude, 196 00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:27,493 and, plus, that was just ice water anyway. 197 00:06:27,521 --> 00:06:28,761 Yeah, but you just replace the ice water 198 00:06:28,789 --> 00:06:29,989 with acid or something. It's perfect. 199 00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:31,963 - Ooh. - I hate you guys so much. 200 00:06:31,992 --> 00:06:33,662 You know who can help us? My uncle John. 201 00:06:33,694 --> 00:06:34,864 I'm gonna take you to go see him. 202 00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:36,095 Relax, buddy. We got your back. 203 00:06:36,129 --> 00:06:38,199 Don't even worry. Let's go. 204 00:06:38,231 --> 00:06:41,471 [upbeat rock music] 205 00:06:41,502 --> 00:06:46,142 * 206 00:06:50,644 --> 00:06:52,154 (man) Wait a minute. Every time I go to grab one 207 00:06:52,179 --> 00:06:54,079 and you tell me I can't have it, it makes a Pung. 208 00:06:54,114 --> 00:06:55,524 It's not your turn. 209 00:06:55,549 --> 00:06:56,649 You're making up your own rules. 210 00:06:56,684 --> 00:06:58,154 Wait your turn. It's not rules. 211 00:06:58,185 --> 00:06:59,885 But it's a Pung. You said it's like Go Fish. 212 00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:01,560 - It's the same-- - Uncle John. 213 00:07:01,589 --> 00:07:03,059 I'm not interrupting, right? 214 00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:04,890 Hang on a second. 215 00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:06,985 [rap music playing] 216 00:07:07,027 --> 00:07:10,027 It's lunch, and I'm on a roll, so make it fast, kid. 217 00:07:10,063 --> 00:07:12,573 - Pork bun? - No, I'm good. 218 00:07:12,600 --> 00:07:13,730 I just wanted to introduce you 219 00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:15,137 to my friend Paul. 220 00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:16,768 (Anthony) We had a question we wanted to ask. 221 00:07:16,804 --> 00:07:17,844 Yeah, what's that? 222 00:07:17,871 --> 00:07:19,911 Maybe we should go outside. 223 00:07:19,940 --> 00:07:21,680 Don't worry about the crouching tigers. 224 00:07:21,709 --> 00:07:23,709 They don't speak English. 225 00:07:23,744 --> 00:07:25,554 He's fine. 226 00:07:25,579 --> 00:07:28,019 Whatever you have to say to me, you can say in front of him. 227 00:07:28,048 --> 00:07:29,818 He has a very low retention rate. 228 00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:34,620 (Paul) Okay, um, Anthony? 229 00:07:34,655 --> 00:07:35,885 What, me? 230 00:07:35,923 --> 00:07:37,263 Dude, it's your grandfather. 231 00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:39,160 Yeah, but I don't do this a lot, so just... 232 00:07:39,192 --> 00:07:41,032 (Anthony) Okay, but you said that if I brought you here-- 233 00:07:41,061 --> 00:07:42,831 - Hey. [both speaking at once] 234 00:07:42,863 --> 00:07:44,233 We don't have all day. 235 00:07:44,264 --> 00:07:46,634 All right, fine. I'll go. 236 00:07:46,667 --> 00:07:50,097 Uncle John, we were wondering if you may know someone 237 00:07:50,137 --> 00:07:52,707 who could kill Paul's grandfather. 238 00:07:58,746 --> 00:08:00,176 I thought you said they don't speak English. 239 00:08:00,213 --> 00:08:01,723 What are you insinuating? 240 00:08:01,749 --> 00:08:03,679 That I'm, what, a murderer? 241 00:08:03,717 --> 00:08:05,287 No, no, no, no. It's not like that. 242 00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:08,818 It's--it's just that my grandpa's really sick. 243 00:08:08,856 --> 00:08:10,156 Apparently not as sick as you. 244 00:08:10,190 --> 00:08:11,660 (man) Let me ask you a question. 245 00:08:11,692 --> 00:08:12,992 What did this scumbag do to you, huh? 246 00:08:13,026 --> 00:08:14,796 Give you a little diddle when you were a kid? 247 00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:16,698 No, no, he didn't diddle me. 248 00:08:16,730 --> 00:08:18,930 You sure there wasn't a little tickle time late at night? 249 00:08:18,966 --> 00:08:20,626 It's okay. You can tell the truth. 250 00:08:20,668 --> 00:08:22,738 Yeah, I'm absolutely sure there was no tickle time. 251 00:08:22,770 --> 00:08:24,200 He's a great grandpa. 252 00:08:24,237 --> 00:08:25,807 Well, then, why do you want him dead? 253 00:08:25,839 --> 00:08:27,009 I don't. It's just-- 254 00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:28,740 I'm confused. Is it me? 255 00:08:28,776 --> 00:08:30,136 Do you understand what the hell he's saying? 256 00:08:30,177 --> 00:08:31,607 [speaking foreign language] [bleep]. 257 00:08:31,645 --> 00:08:33,205 [speaking foreign language] 258 00:08:33,246 --> 00:08:34,646 What? 259 00:08:34,682 --> 00:08:36,252 Guys, let me just explain, okay? 260 00:08:36,283 --> 00:08:37,853 Paul's his favorite grandson. 261 00:08:37,885 --> 00:08:39,885 - I'm his only grandson. - You know what? 262 00:08:39,920 --> 00:08:41,590 That's sweet, 263 00:08:41,622 --> 00:08:43,562 but I've had enough for one day. 264 00:08:43,591 --> 00:08:46,631 Why don't you guys go sharpen your skates or something? 265 00:08:46,660 --> 00:08:49,060 I got a few thousand yen to take here. 266 00:08:49,096 --> 00:08:51,596 (Anthony) Right, but-- 267 00:08:51,632 --> 00:08:53,702 Suck a dick, Anthony, 268 00:08:53,734 --> 00:08:56,174 and get lost...now. 269 00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:58,173 Absolutely. Sucking a dick. 270 00:08:58,205 --> 00:09:00,065 Thanks for your time, Uncle John. 271 00:09:00,107 --> 00:09:02,707 You would kill your papa? 272 00:09:02,743 --> 00:09:05,013 [speaking foreign language] 273 00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:07,005 You're right. 274 00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:08,877 Let's... Let's just get out of here. 275 00:09:08,916 --> 00:09:12,316 [bell jingles] 276 00:09:12,352 --> 00:09:13,652 Well, that went well. 277 00:09:13,687 --> 00:09:15,017 [whistles] Guys, guys. 278 00:09:16,690 --> 00:09:18,330 I think I can help you out. 279 00:09:18,358 --> 00:09:20,688 - Really? - Bro, that's awesome. 280 00:09:20,728 --> 00:09:22,728 Gonna run you about 25 grand. 281 00:09:22,763 --> 00:09:25,033 - Not that awesome. - Hey, hey, listen to me. 282 00:09:25,065 --> 00:09:26,965 It's worth it, okay? 283 00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:29,370 Your pervert grandfather won't know what hit him. 284 00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:32,972 He's not a pervert. He's, uh... 285 00:09:33,006 --> 00:09:34,876 Okay, yeah, maybe he is. 286 00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:36,638 You're right. Is this a good--this is good? 287 00:09:36,677 --> 00:09:39,077 No, no, this is better than good. 288 00:09:39,112 --> 00:09:41,252 I came across a couple of vintage grenades 289 00:09:41,281 --> 00:09:43,221 at a garage sale in Sayville. 290 00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:45,350 I'm gonna put two so far up his ass 291 00:09:45,385 --> 00:09:46,915 that when they explode, 292 00:09:46,954 --> 00:09:48,824 his colon's gonna soar through the sky 293 00:09:48,856 --> 00:09:50,956 like a [bleep] sonic jet. 294 00:09:50,991 --> 00:09:52,791 Boom, huh? 295 00:09:52,826 --> 00:09:54,086 How about we talk it over, 296 00:09:54,127 --> 00:09:55,827 and then we'll get back to you? 297 00:09:55,863 --> 00:09:57,203 All right, all right, you know what? 298 00:09:57,230 --> 00:09:59,130 For you, because this is John's nephew, 299 00:09:59,166 --> 00:10:01,226 I'll do it for 20 Gs, but we have to close right now. 300 00:10:01,268 --> 00:10:02,868 I got a schedule. 301 00:10:02,903 --> 00:10:05,273 Well, I appreciate the family discount, 302 00:10:05,305 --> 00:10:07,305 and I just feel like we need to have a discussion 303 00:10:07,340 --> 00:10:10,280 before we decide to blow my grandpa's asshole open 304 00:10:10,310 --> 00:10:13,050 with grenades, so thank you. 305 00:10:13,080 --> 00:10:14,920 You know, I can't hold on to these grenades forever 306 00:10:14,948 --> 00:10:16,048 for youse, right? 307 00:10:16,083 --> 00:10:17,723 You understand that? 308 00:10:17,751 --> 00:10:19,121 Well, that's just a chance we're gonna take, 309 00:10:19,152 --> 00:10:20,322 'cause we got to talk it over, so... 310 00:10:20,353 --> 00:10:21,353 - Go to go run. - Serious? 311 00:10:21,388 --> 00:10:23,088 - Yep. Thanks. - Yeah. 312 00:10:23,123 --> 00:10:24,763 All right, you know where to find me, though, right? 313 00:10:24,792 --> 00:10:25,862 - Uh-huh. - I do financing. 314 00:10:31,031 --> 00:10:33,801 (Paul) So, Grandpa, 315 00:10:33,834 --> 00:10:35,344 I've been thinking about what you said. 316 00:10:35,368 --> 00:10:37,168 I really have. 317 00:10:37,204 --> 00:10:38,974 I even spoke to Anthony here about it. 318 00:10:39,006 --> 00:10:40,236 How you doing, Mr. Rosenberg? 319 00:10:40,273 --> 00:10:42,143 [mouthing words] 320 00:10:42,175 --> 00:10:46,245 Anyway, I'm thinking you really don't want to die. 321 00:10:46,279 --> 00:10:49,049 Yeah, life seems like it's going downhill right now, 322 00:10:49,082 --> 00:10:51,422 but maybe you just need to change up your routine 323 00:10:51,451 --> 00:10:53,691 or get a new project. 324 00:10:53,721 --> 00:10:56,291 Yeah, like, I think, you know, the exterior of the house 325 00:10:56,323 --> 00:10:58,993 could use a new coat of paint. 326 00:10:59,026 --> 00:11:00,386 [murmurs and scoffs] 327 00:11:00,427 --> 00:11:01,857 (Anthony) Okay. 328 00:11:01,895 --> 00:11:03,425 All I'm saying is that, you know, 329 00:11:03,463 --> 00:11:06,033 if you're depressed, maybe you should talk to somebody. 330 00:11:06,066 --> 00:11:08,936 I told you I'm done. My friends are dead. 331 00:11:08,969 --> 00:11:11,099 My body's giving out. Shit, I had to go out 332 00:11:11,138 --> 00:11:13,468 and buy an extra high toilet seat the other day 333 00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:17,006 just to keep my sack from touching the water. 334 00:11:17,044 --> 00:11:18,354 Yeah, that might be a sign. 335 00:11:18,378 --> 00:11:19,848 This is not a debate, 336 00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:21,410 and it's not a request. 337 00:11:21,448 --> 00:11:23,448 Now, you went and thought about it, 338 00:11:23,483 --> 00:11:25,293 so what did you come up with? 339 00:11:25,318 --> 00:11:26,488 I can't do it. 340 00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:30,159 We spoke to a guy, and he wants 25 grand 341 00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:32,190 to put grenades up your ass. 342 00:11:32,225 --> 00:11:34,955 I'm sitting here putting my affairs in order, 343 00:11:34,995 --> 00:11:37,095 and you're telling me you're gonna get some stranger 344 00:11:37,130 --> 00:11:39,170 to put grenades up my ass? 345 00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:40,899 Jesus, Grandpa, this is new to me, okay? 346 00:11:40,934 --> 00:11:43,044 It's not like I went to college for assisted suicide. 347 00:11:43,070 --> 00:11:44,440 - What'd you go for? - Economics. 348 00:11:44,471 --> 00:11:46,071 Oh, that's boring as shit. 349 00:11:46,106 --> 00:11:48,136 I'm surprised you haven't killed yourself. 350 00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:50,405 Look, I'm gonna die, 351 00:11:50,443 --> 00:11:52,013 and you're gonna help me. 352 00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:53,775 - How? - Choke me. 353 00:11:53,814 --> 00:11:56,084 That'll be best for both of us. 354 00:11:56,116 --> 00:11:57,986 I'll be back in a second. 355 00:11:59,953 --> 00:12:01,523 Holy shit, bro. 356 00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:03,294 You may really have to do this. 357 00:12:03,323 --> 00:12:06,133 I mean, it seems like it's what he wants, right? 358 00:12:06,159 --> 00:12:08,199 So what? I want a big set of tits in my face. 359 00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:09,828 You gonna make my dream come true? 360 00:12:09,863 --> 00:12:11,503 Dude, this is murder, 361 00:12:11,531 --> 00:12:14,101 not to mention you're breaking, like, the first commandment. 362 00:12:14,134 --> 00:12:15,474 I don't think that's the first commandment. 363 00:12:15,502 --> 00:12:16,972 It's definitely the first commandment. 364 00:12:17,004 --> 00:12:18,944 All of a sudden you're a man of God? 365 00:12:18,972 --> 00:12:20,872 I don't think Moses was walking around with his stone tablets 366 00:12:20,908 --> 00:12:22,478 looking for a big set of tits in his face. 367 00:12:22,509 --> 00:12:24,139 Yeah, well, at least I'm not playing God. 368 00:12:24,177 --> 00:12:26,947 He's miserable. He's begging me. 369 00:12:26,980 --> 00:12:28,820 Well, morally it's wrong, so... 370 00:12:28,849 --> 00:12:30,549 Oh, you of all people are not gonna weigh in on morality. 371 00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:32,193 - All right, buddy? - Yeah, well... 372 00:12:32,219 --> 00:12:33,449 (Paul) What's this? 373 00:12:33,486 --> 00:12:35,086 This is my life insurance policy. 374 00:12:35,122 --> 00:12:36,962 I made you the beneficiary. 375 00:12:36,990 --> 00:12:38,360 It's 10 grand. 376 00:12:38,391 --> 00:12:39,431 Oh, I'll do it, Mr. Rosenberg. 377 00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:41,059 - Fine. - No prob-- 378 00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:42,904 I'll do it. 379 00:12:42,930 --> 00:12:44,100 Do me a favor. 380 00:12:44,131 --> 00:12:45,971 Keep him at home when you do it. 381 00:12:45,999 --> 00:12:47,269 [whispers] Okay. 382 00:12:47,300 --> 00:12:50,270 [upbeat music] 383 00:12:50,303 --> 00:12:52,873 * 384 00:12:52,906 --> 00:12:55,306 (Paul) Hey, where's Declan? 385 00:12:55,342 --> 00:12:57,282 I threw him to bed. He was being a lunatic tonight. 386 00:12:57,310 --> 00:12:58,380 Yeah, I can relate to that. 387 00:12:58,411 --> 00:13:00,211 I, uh-- I need to talk to you. 388 00:13:00,247 --> 00:13:02,047 Remember when my grandpa called the other day? 389 00:13:02,082 --> 00:13:03,452 - Yeah. - Okay. 390 00:13:03,483 --> 00:13:05,153 Well, I went over to see him, 391 00:13:05,185 --> 00:13:08,185 and he asked me to do something. 392 00:13:08,221 --> 00:13:09,521 He wants to die. 393 00:13:09,556 --> 00:13:10,816 Don't we all? 394 00:13:10,858 --> 00:13:11,988 Yeah, but he wants me to do it. 395 00:13:12,025 --> 00:13:13,355 He wants me to choke him to death. 396 00:13:13,393 --> 00:13:15,363 Are you serious? 397 00:13:15,395 --> 00:13:16,855 Yeah, I'm serious. 398 00:13:16,897 --> 00:13:19,267 Well, when you said no, he said what? 399 00:13:19,299 --> 00:13:20,529 I... 400 00:13:20,567 --> 00:13:21,967 What did he say when you said no, Paul? 401 00:13:22,002 --> 00:13:24,472 See, I didn't exactly say no. 402 00:13:24,504 --> 00:13:26,114 Honey, are you insane? 403 00:13:26,139 --> 00:13:29,109 You cannot choke him to death. 404 00:13:29,142 --> 00:13:30,512 I know, but he was begging me, okay? 405 00:13:30,543 --> 00:13:32,453 And he had a lot of really good arguments 406 00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:33,479 as to why I should do it. 407 00:13:33,513 --> 00:13:35,283 Wait a second. 408 00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:36,875 I don't even know why we're talking about this. 409 00:13:36,917 --> 00:13:38,847 I know you, 410 00:13:38,886 --> 00:13:40,346 and you can't pull this off. 411 00:13:40,387 --> 00:13:42,157 What, you don't think I have the mental strength? 412 00:13:42,189 --> 00:13:44,019 No, I don't think you have the physical know-how. 413 00:13:44,057 --> 00:13:46,487 Excuse me? Of course I do, okay? 414 00:13:46,526 --> 00:13:48,426 Okay, Chris Weidman, 415 00:13:48,461 --> 00:13:50,331 show me what you got. 416 00:13:50,363 --> 00:13:51,603 Choke me out. 417 00:13:51,631 --> 00:13:53,101 Okay. Fine. 418 00:13:53,133 --> 00:13:54,373 I'm not gonna go full speed. 419 00:13:54,401 --> 00:13:55,501 Okay, thanks. 420 00:13:55,535 --> 00:13:56,565 I love you. 421 00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:01,039 - Am I hurting you? - [laughs] 422 00:14:01,074 --> 00:14:02,644 Just stop. 423 00:14:02,675 --> 00:14:05,205 Okay, you really have no idea what you're doing. 424 00:14:05,245 --> 00:14:06,975 First of all, you don't do it from the front. 425 00:14:07,014 --> 00:14:08,884 You do it from behind. 426 00:14:08,916 --> 00:14:10,516 How long have I been taking self-defense? 427 00:14:10,550 --> 00:14:11,620 - A long time. - Yeah. 428 00:14:11,651 --> 00:14:13,591 Okay. Get behind me. 429 00:14:13,620 --> 00:14:15,020 - Okay. - Okay. 430 00:14:15,055 --> 00:14:16,185 - Now keep your body close... - Right. 431 00:14:16,223 --> 00:14:17,563 But your head back. 432 00:14:17,590 --> 00:14:19,360 - Take your left arm across. - All right. 433 00:14:19,392 --> 00:14:21,462 And press your left forearm against my neck. 434 00:14:21,494 --> 00:14:23,234 And now grip the inside of your right elbow. 435 00:14:23,263 --> 00:14:24,233 Okay. 436 00:14:24,264 --> 00:14:25,274 Then use your right hand 437 00:14:25,298 --> 00:14:27,098 to press my head forward. 438 00:14:27,134 --> 00:14:28,304 Oh, okay. 439 00:14:28,335 --> 00:14:30,435 - Hey, now. Hey. - Hey. 440 00:14:30,470 --> 00:14:32,240 Can you please stop grinding on me like that? 441 00:14:32,272 --> 00:14:33,942 Grandpa's not gonna sit still for you, Paul. 442 00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:35,284 Maybe so, but I don't think he's gonna be 443 00:14:35,308 --> 00:14:36,438 moving his ass like this. Hey. 444 00:14:36,476 --> 00:14:37,676 What, you don't like it? 445 00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:39,410 No, I do like it. That's the problem. 446 00:14:39,446 --> 00:14:41,646 Oh, my God, that feels good. 447 00:14:41,681 --> 00:14:44,321 [relaxed music] 448 00:14:44,351 --> 00:14:48,521 [phone ringing] 449 00:14:48,555 --> 00:14:49,915 Oh, no. 450 00:14:49,957 --> 00:14:51,487 [ringing continues] 451 00:14:51,524 --> 00:14:53,064 * 452 00:14:53,093 --> 00:14:54,233 [answering machine beeps] 453 00:14:54,261 --> 00:14:56,001 (Jerry) Paul, it's grandpa. 454 00:14:56,029 --> 00:14:58,129 I just wanted to thank you for everything 455 00:14:58,165 --> 00:15:01,195 and tell you I can't wait to see you tomorrow. 456 00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:02,604 Good night. 457 00:15:02,635 --> 00:15:04,395 Good night. 458 00:15:09,642 --> 00:15:12,612 [upbeat music] 459 00:15:12,645 --> 00:15:13,675 * 460 00:15:13,713 --> 00:15:17,283 You look good. 461 00:15:17,317 --> 00:15:18,587 But before we get started, 462 00:15:18,618 --> 00:15:20,248 take this. 463 00:15:20,287 --> 00:15:23,487 I made you my Facebook legacy contact. 464 00:15:23,523 --> 00:15:25,163 Here's all the information you'll need 465 00:15:25,192 --> 00:15:27,732 to keep my page updated and active. 466 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:29,030 Great. 467 00:15:29,062 --> 00:15:30,332 For how long? 468 00:15:30,363 --> 00:15:31,403 I don't know. 469 00:15:31,431 --> 00:15:32,971 At least until you're my age. 470 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:34,430 There's enough material there 471 00:15:34,467 --> 00:15:37,567 to carry it through the next three Muslim presidents. 472 00:15:37,604 --> 00:15:38,974 What is this other stuff? 473 00:15:39,006 --> 00:15:40,336 That's my legacy. 474 00:15:40,373 --> 00:15:42,383 My greatest hits, if you will. 475 00:15:42,409 --> 00:15:44,009 This is your greatest hits? 476 00:15:44,044 --> 00:15:45,584 Damn straight. 477 00:15:45,612 --> 00:15:47,582 This picture here was taken 478 00:15:47,614 --> 00:15:51,524 July 4, 1976, the bicentennial. 479 00:15:51,551 --> 00:15:56,661 Jack Smyth bet me I couldn't drink 76 cans of Schlitz. 480 00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:58,659 He lost. 481 00:15:58,691 --> 00:16:01,331 All right, let's get on with it. 482 00:16:01,361 --> 00:16:03,631 [sighs] 483 00:16:03,663 --> 00:16:05,133 You sure you want me to do this? 484 00:16:05,165 --> 00:16:06,625 How many times have we talked about this? 485 00:16:06,666 --> 00:16:08,736 I can't go on living this way anymore. 486 00:16:08,768 --> 00:16:11,738 Okay. Here goes. 487 00:16:11,771 --> 00:16:12,741 [sighs] 488 00:16:12,772 --> 00:16:14,112 (Jerry) Where you going? 489 00:16:14,141 --> 00:16:16,181 Just relax, okay? 490 00:16:17,410 --> 00:16:18,550 [sighs] 491 00:16:18,578 --> 00:16:20,048 Okay. 492 00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:21,350 [relaxed music] 493 00:16:21,381 --> 00:16:23,781 - [grunts] - Okay. 494 00:16:23,816 --> 00:16:26,586 - There you go. Okay. - [grunts] 495 00:16:26,619 --> 00:16:28,359 There you go. 496 00:16:28,388 --> 00:16:32,228 [both grunting] 497 00:16:32,259 --> 00:16:33,329 [grunts] 498 00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:35,400 What is this, Studio 54? 499 00:16:35,428 --> 00:16:36,758 I asked you to choke me, 500 00:16:36,796 --> 00:16:39,426 not diddle me like some back-alley queen. 501 00:16:39,466 --> 00:16:41,196 You're not supposed to be moving like that. 502 00:16:41,234 --> 00:16:44,104 I'm not gonna sit there on my way into the afterlife 503 00:16:44,137 --> 00:16:46,137 with your pecker up against my bunghole. 504 00:16:46,173 --> 00:16:48,543 Come around the front and do it the right way. 505 00:16:48,575 --> 00:16:50,775 Okay. I'm sorry. 506 00:16:50,810 --> 00:16:52,480 - [sighs] - I love you, Pappy. 507 00:16:52,512 --> 00:16:55,722 - Just get on with it. - [sighs] 508 00:16:55,748 --> 00:16:59,418 [grunting] 509 00:16:59,452 --> 00:17:02,662 [both grunting] 510 00:17:02,689 --> 00:17:05,129 [grunts] What did you stop for? 511 00:17:05,158 --> 00:17:06,458 Because you threw my hands off of you. 512 00:17:06,493 --> 00:17:09,133 It was a reflex, you moron. What did you expect? 513 00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:10,562 Can't I just put a pillow over your head or something? 514 00:17:10,597 --> 00:17:12,327 No, I want to look you in the eyes. 515 00:17:12,365 --> 00:17:14,325 Now, come on, you pussy. 516 00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:16,137 [grunts] Do it. 517 00:17:16,169 --> 00:17:17,499 - [whimpering] - [grunting] 518 00:17:17,537 --> 00:17:19,337 [growling] Yeah. Yeah. 519 00:17:19,372 --> 00:17:22,442 [both grunting] 520 00:17:22,475 --> 00:17:24,735 [gasping] 521 00:17:24,777 --> 00:17:26,607 [panting] 522 00:17:26,646 --> 00:17:28,816 [exhales] 523 00:17:28,848 --> 00:17:30,678 [sighs] 524 00:17:34,154 --> 00:17:37,164 [sobbing] 525 00:17:41,161 --> 00:17:43,731 [crying] 526 00:17:43,763 --> 00:17:46,603 Stop your crying. 527 00:17:46,633 --> 00:17:48,743 Grandpa, oh, my God. 528 00:17:48,768 --> 00:17:50,198 Thank God you're still alive. 529 00:17:50,237 --> 00:17:52,337 Oh, I don't know if it was God, Paulie. 530 00:17:52,372 --> 00:17:53,612 What do you mean? 531 00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:55,240 While we were thrashing around there, 532 00:17:55,275 --> 00:17:57,175 I started getting these flashing images 533 00:17:57,210 --> 00:17:58,580 in front of my eyes. 534 00:17:58,611 --> 00:18:00,151 - Of your family? - Nah. 535 00:18:00,180 --> 00:18:02,380 Of some of those broads on Facebook, 536 00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:05,885 and I thought I'd give the old lightsaber another chance. 537 00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:07,418 Wait a minute. 538 00:18:07,454 --> 00:18:08,524 That's what you were thinking about 539 00:18:08,555 --> 00:18:09,515 when you were dying, is-- 540 00:18:09,556 --> 00:18:10,816 Yeah. [chuckles] 541 00:18:10,857 --> 00:18:12,357 Not your family or your life? 542 00:18:12,392 --> 00:18:13,632 Nah, not at all. 543 00:18:13,660 --> 00:18:15,430 I just kept thinking about 544 00:18:15,462 --> 00:18:19,472 Ronda Green's fat, juicy ass. 545 00:18:19,499 --> 00:18:20,869 [both laugh] 546 00:18:20,900 --> 00:18:23,670 Well, I'm glad you're alive, Grandpa. 547 00:18:23,703 --> 00:18:26,713 Yeah, well, thank God you're such a weakling 548 00:18:26,739 --> 00:18:28,509 with pussy hands. 549 00:18:28,541 --> 00:18:30,781 [chuckling] 550 00:18:30,810 --> 00:18:33,810 [upbeat music] 551 00:18:33,846 --> 00:18:36,416 * 552 00:18:38,285 --> 00:18:40,185 Where's Rosenberg? 553 00:18:40,220 --> 00:18:42,520 I haven't seen him since he went to go murder his grandfather. 554 00:18:42,555 --> 00:18:43,815 Got to be rough. 555 00:18:43,856 --> 00:18:45,556 Heard he did that grenade challenge. 556 00:18:45,592 --> 00:18:48,432 What, he actually put grenades in his grandfather's ass? 557 00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:49,831 Dude, what do you expect, bro? 558 00:18:49,862 --> 00:18:51,262 He's the new Dexter. 559 00:18:51,298 --> 00:18:53,398 What's up, cock knockers? 560 00:18:53,433 --> 00:18:55,303 (Anthony) What the hell? Mr. Rosenberg? 561 00:18:55,335 --> 00:18:57,535 - Hey, fellas. - You look great, Mr. Rosenberg. 562 00:18:57,570 --> 00:18:59,770 I never felt better, Shitski. 563 00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:01,866 - Who taught him that name? - That would be me. 564 00:19:01,908 --> 00:19:04,738 (Anthony) Uh, so how have you two been? 565 00:19:04,777 --> 00:19:07,377 Well, for starters, it was a hell of a week, 566 00:19:07,414 --> 00:19:09,824 but I finally saw the light, fellas, 567 00:19:09,849 --> 00:19:11,649 and this guy right here, 568 00:19:11,684 --> 00:19:13,224 he helped me find it. 569 00:19:13,253 --> 00:19:14,893 (Anthony) Do you want to stay for the game? 570 00:19:14,921 --> 00:19:17,321 I mean, be nice to have some fans on our side for a change. 571 00:19:17,357 --> 00:19:18,757 I'm not here to see you guys. 572 00:19:18,791 --> 00:19:21,961 I came to watch my girlfriend's grandson PJ. 573 00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:24,704 - Whoa, you got a girlfriend? - Yeah. Ronda. 574 00:19:24,731 --> 00:19:27,501 She was my nurse when I had my gallbladder taken out. 575 00:19:27,534 --> 00:19:29,874 We just reconnected on Facebook. 576 00:19:29,902 --> 00:19:32,472 That's the greatest invention ever. 577 00:19:32,505 --> 00:19:34,505 There's a sea of lonely pussy out there 578 00:19:34,541 --> 00:19:36,741 just waiting to be poked. 579 00:19:36,776 --> 00:19:38,206 [Jerry chuckles] 580 00:19:38,245 --> 00:19:40,505 Hey, Paulie told me that you guys 581 00:19:40,547 --> 00:19:41,977 are having a rough season. 582 00:19:42,014 --> 00:19:44,454 That is no reason for you to just give up. 583 00:19:44,484 --> 00:19:45,924 Hell, a couple days ago, 584 00:19:45,952 --> 00:19:47,952 I was ready to give up on everything. 585 00:19:47,987 --> 00:19:50,587 I kept telling myself that life sucks. 586 00:19:50,623 --> 00:19:52,533 And then at the last second, 587 00:19:52,559 --> 00:19:55,699 I realized that we have to play the hand that we're dealt 588 00:19:55,728 --> 00:19:58,898 and play to whatever strengths we have left. 589 00:19:58,931 --> 00:20:01,331 So my advice to you guys is 590 00:20:01,368 --> 00:20:03,768 to live every moment like it's your last 591 00:20:03,803 --> 00:20:06,473 and do what you do best. 592 00:20:06,506 --> 00:20:09,406 For me, that's banging Ronda's juicy ass, 593 00:20:09,442 --> 00:20:10,982 and for you guys, 594 00:20:11,010 --> 00:20:14,610 the thing might just be sucking at hockey. 595 00:20:14,647 --> 00:20:16,377 [chuckles] 596 00:20:18,685 --> 00:20:20,345 - Um... - Uh... 597 00:20:20,387 --> 00:20:22,387 All right, well, are you guys ready to do this? 598 00:20:22,422 --> 00:20:23,592 Should we do this? 599 00:20:23,623 --> 00:20:24,823 I got to check in with Karen. 600 00:20:24,857 --> 00:20:27,827 - Yeah, of course you do. - Okay. 601 00:20:27,860 --> 00:20:29,260 We really are not very good. 602 00:20:31,898 --> 00:20:33,598 It's just weird, like, what-- 603 00:20:33,633 --> 00:20:34,773 to have, like, a small bladder like that. 604 00:20:34,801 --> 00:20:36,801 You wait 20 minutes, you just go pee. 605 00:20:36,836 --> 00:20:38,436 I know. You'd think the greatest player in NHL history 606 00:20:38,471 --> 00:20:40,471 would have a bit of a bigger bladder, but, I mean-- 607 00:20:40,507 --> 00:20:41,607 He's got a horrible bladder. 608 00:20:41,641 --> 00:20:42,781 I wonder how that jersey smelled. 609 00:20:42,809 --> 00:20:44,279 I wonder how much it cost. 610 00:20:44,311 --> 00:20:46,851 I would say Gretzky piss jersey, 75 grand. 611 00:20:46,879 --> 00:20:48,349 What if you got a Gretzky jersey, 612 00:20:48,381 --> 00:20:49,881 found out it didn't have his pee. 613 00:20:49,916 --> 00:20:51,576 Oh, I'd mail it right back to whoever gave it to me. 614 00:20:51,618 --> 00:20:52,988 Yeah, that's like-- 615 00:20:53,019 --> 00:20:54,549 I only want a Gretzky piss jersey, now that I know. 616 00:20:54,587 --> 00:20:55,557 That's better than an autograph. 617 00:20:55,588 --> 00:20:56,588 [scoffs] Yeah.